#also no offense but how is the mc such a fucking dumbass and everyone’s like ‘ooooo she’s so special and quirky and psychic’

[twistedappletree]

i really wanted to like longlegs but this has gotta be one of the shittiest movies i’ve ever seen in my life 😭

[thedepthsremember]

TRR 3.21: “Taken” aka ten minutes before this chapter dropped I woke up abruptly so I was shaky from adrenaline LET'S DO THIS

Ahhhh we're starting off with the SAD MUSIC oh boy :( 

Ah yes. We are definitely kidnapped. IF Y'ALL HURT MAXWELL I AM BURNING YOU TO THE GROUND 

This place is giving me flashbacks to the dungeons in Dragon Age: Origins. Where’s my dumbass buddy Jowan? god I really have a type huh

Wassup, Anton? Oooo he got a new outfit! He kinda looks like a priest with my glasses off.

I'm gonna put my glasses on.

My skin crawls hearing him describe Olivia as his wife. Olivia agrees and threatens dismemberment. Stab him, STAB HIM GIRL

The people love me, he can't make me a martyr and expect the people to just go with it. 

He disregards this. But he honestly likes Riley, which I guess is...….. nice... But not worth much since he’s still trying to murder her and everyone she cares about. :////

Also hurts to hear him say that in front of Maxwell who honestly liked Justin. :/ Maxwell just kinda. quietly sad in his corner. 

Liam's coming for us, and sounds like they've got Gladys locked up, now that she's done playing her part. Oh dear. I’m betting diamond choice for if we get her out or not.

Wassup Claudius. So this is the SOB who shot Drake (and almost me).

As a Hufflepuff and admittedly a bit removed from the situation, I remain more offended that he shot my friend than me. Riley doesn't share my feelings and is still rather personally offended. 

Sure, remove your mask from your face so I can punch it. 

Oh he's older than I thought he’d be. Hello jerk Zaeed. 

Do I defend Drake or do I insult his dumb face. Ughhh fine I'll be slightly more mature, I bet it’s cooler anyway. [it is]

Yep. Here's what this whole story comes down to. Are Liam's emotions his strength that's going to make him the King who’s right for Cordonia, or a weakness that'll doom us all?

If you have any doubt, you haven’t been following along. (But it’s fun to worry about it anyway.)

Claude: *calls Olivia a shrew*

SHREW?? SHREW MOTHERUFCKER ESCUSE ME I am about to rip myself free from these ropes and scratch out your eyes.

Ooo TCATF reference~ (this is like the only one I’m going to catch, I’m only 2 chapters in)

Olivia’s trauma conga line continues. :( God, it hurts me to think about how she grew up trying to live up to her name and her parents’ legacy, and of course loving them and wanting to know more about them... and now the more she finds out about it the more it only hurts her. 

Way back in chapter 10, if you ask Olivia’s aunt what Olivia’s parents were like: 

Sorry I just had to drag someone down that road with me to know what I was thinking about when...…. 

OLIVIA CALLED ME HER FRIEND. HER ONLY FRIEND. (sorry Liam you're out I'M IN) I'M HONESTLY CRYING HARDER THAN FOR THE WEDDING.

ahhhhhh, she’s just come so far. 

Anton gets in close to gloat. Idiot is in HEADBUTTING RANGE and I am TAKING IT. 

DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH MAXWELL DON'T YOU DARE 

THEY KNOCKED HIM OUT. OLIVIA FIND ME A SWORD, NOTHING WILL SAVE ANY OF YOU NOW. 

They leave us alone. Olivia says this isn’t how she expected the evening to end. Considering it is Riley’s wedding day, I have to say she had a fairly different idea of how she wanted this night to go as well. 

Yes Olivia, mediate on the image of PUNCHING ANTON'S STUPID FACE in a nice lovely field with a breeze. :) :) :) ahhh. relaxing.

(If you panic instead, MC cries that they’ll never kiss their LI or wear another fancy hat again!!! Olivia is unmoved by our nonsense.) 

Riley remembers her Cinderella roots and considers asking the mice for help chewing through the ropes. Dude, you’re trapped with Olivia. In this dress her earrings are knives. I think we'll be okay.

It is possible to mess up the escape real bad and get Olivia stabbed twice before you leave. It is hilarious, but throughout this whole thing my best efforts never got Riley killed. Bummer. 

MAXWELL'S OKAY!!! excuse you Olivia, this display of affection is totally necessary, did you not see the soulmate point. The game agrees with me.

Nggghh we have to solve a riddle to get outta here. Or else deadly traps. "The best offense requires a personal touch...” Shield because heraldry? But also like all Nevrakis stuff is stabbing, but here our only option is a sword and not knife. Uhhhhhhhhh ok sword.

Holy shit I did it! 

[Even if you mess up and hit all the options, the traps mostly stab at you a bit. Nobody actually dies. Bah.]

But if we did... How awkward. They come down to take us to mock Liam and we’re dead already. ‘mmm yes this is uhhh exactly as planned.’ 

Hey it's the lighthouse background! NIKOLAI WE'RE COMING FOR YOU Oh wrong book.

GLADYS?!!! Guys it’s Gladys! Wait uh no i’m not happy to see her. She tarnished my Rogue Leader title. 

*sighs* ........Guys I am such a fucking sap. I've forgiven her already. It's ok just like, stop using the sad sprite. 

THAT’S RIGHT YOU MADE MAXWELL SAD sympathy retracted.

My priorities are so messed up, guys. What even.

*sighs* Ok Gladys, just take us to the weapons.

If she stabs me in the back again, I deserve it at this point. 

“Olivia is it just me or does this look like your armory?” Yes guys, it is the Same Background.

Aww Gladys. It’s about what I thought. You got a crap deal and were very foolish and trusting about finding a way out of it. She didn’t even realize she was working for Anton. This was dumb and you're still super fired but I can’t really be mad. 

It’s a good look at how wacky nobles with their silly obsessions can actually hurt people without thinking about it. You’re in a position of power, you’ve gotta think about more than yourself. 

Looking at the different playthroughs, each of the LIs chooses a different weapon. Maxwell got a fancy knife (it kinda looks like it swings from the handle?? wild). Hana gets the double-bladed sword (hot). Drake picks up a sword (and they mention his duel with Neville). Neat detail. 

EYYY Olivia picked the pretty dagger that iirc looks like the one I used to open champagne at the Beaumont Bash :D bestiesssss 

....Damn. This means I can’t use it. I personally also prefer either the small stabbables or a bow, but I considering the boutique battle, I guess Riley's style is more swing vigorously. Axe it is! The other ones are too heavy and I’d probably be more likely to hurt myself than someone else honestly. 

Riley finds your weaponry expertise hot, Olivia. Maxwell probably does too. 

…...Oh my god for a minute I thought Olivia was going to stab Gladys in front of me.

I'm doing what's probably the dumb thing and letting her go to cause a distraction but WHELP. Gotta stay true to my brand. i just wanna trust!!!!

Gladys pulls through and keeps guards away from us! I hope she’s okay. [oh my god wait do we ever find out what happens to her??? Gladys??????]

(If you don’t let her go, you see a guard and accidentally almost stab your friends but there isn’t really danger. boooo)

speaking of friends IT’S DRAAAAKE AND HANAAAAA

MY BUDDIES MY GOOD DUDES ♥__♥ *GRABS BOTH OF THEM AND CRIES* 

LIAM YOU BIG.... DUMB.... GRYFFINDOR 😭 He’s gone off BY HIMSELF to stall Anton while Hana and Drake try to find us. Clearly none of them trust the king’s guard and who can blame them. but GOD I AM STRESSED. 

Anton: 'you want to see the hostages? Well uh I... would too, fuck where are they. Guysssss who was watching the hostages D:'

CLAUDIUS DON'T YOU TOUCH LIAM WITH YOUR FILTHY DRAKE SHOOTING HANDS 

Olivia says to wait for the right moment. Uh Olivia is now the moment LIAM'S GONNA GET HIMSELF SHOT

goddddddd he really doesn’t care if he dies as long as it gives us time to get out. L I A M

……… I just realized, if we hadn’t already freed ourselves and Hana and Drake were still looking for us, Liam would’ve definitely gotten himself killed. NO

Oh man Olivia and I vaulting over the banister, weapons in hand, dresses trailing behind us........ What an image 😍

Wh. Why. How could you make me choose who to help WHY I CRY

Ok we're going with Maxwell but if ANY OF THE REST OF YOU ARE DEAD I'M GOING TO BURN CORDONIA TO THE GROUND

“THIS ONE’S FOR RILEY. AND THIS ONE’S ALSO FOR RILEY.” God I love him. I’d be willing to bet that doesn't even change if you're not romancing him either. [I looked it up and it doesn’t! he is so ride or die]

Anytime Riley or Maxwell call each other partner my heart swells and I want to die. ♥

ANTON PULLS A GUN AND MAXWELL JUMPS IN D: Flashbacks to Maxwell being sad he couldn't protect us at the Homecoming ball like Drake did. Noooo baby you don't gotta 

Maxwell: [john mulaney voice] THAT’S MY WIFE!

If we get outta here you know he’s doing that all the time. 

Riley jumps in AND --- what she doesn’t chop Anton's arm off with her freaking battle axe? i guess she didn’t wanna get too gory while she’s wearing white. i mean. knocking things over on him works too.... i guesssss

Riley: AND STAY DOWN Anton: [immediately gets up] Riley: …..godddd dude learn to listen.

What kind of.... secret fighting dance move nonsense is this :'D 

[Drake voice] self defense and dancing aren’t all that different! 

Friends team up and talk the goons out of fighting us. Goons sense we are ANGRY and HOPPED UP ON WEDDING CAKE and VENGENCE and are prepared to BITE OUR WAY OUT OF HERE IF NECESSARY. 

Fukkin Claudius is still here and Drake …… recognizes his voice or something, I’m guessing. 

(dramatic inner monologue about how Drake probably hears that voice in his nightmares when he flashes back to that night... oh no) 

Hell yeah DRAKE REVENGE HEADBUTT!!!

Part of me deeply appreciates him being more vengeful for himself (who actually got shot) than me (who got scared but not at all shot). Everyone here cares about me way too much. 

WHOA

NO

YOU DO NOT STAB OLIVIA ON MY WEDDING DAY ABSOLUTELY NOT D8 

IF YOU CAN BREATHE YOU CAN STAND

AND IF YOU CAN STAND YOU CAN FIGHT

TEARS

(sidenote since I’m pretty sure like. everyone picked that option (and you should it’s hella good), but if you pick “You can’t kill her you need her!” Anton muses that he can just say you did it, and he can get sympathy points from the public for avenging his dead wife. he’s the fucking worst god stab him already Olivia THANKS YOU DID GREAT)

Olivia: “Riley, I’m hurt...” oh god the fact that she’s even admitting that …….. my eyes just won’t stop leaking. 

Oh god ALL these one liners are so fucking good AUGHHHH can I just say them all in succession as he's being dragged off????

YOUR PUN LEVEL IS NOTHING AGAINST MAXWELL, FAKE JUSTIN. NOTHINGGGG

~~~~~VICTORY GROUP HUG~~~~~~

Olivia is horrified by this show of affection. Drake, unwilling group hug veteran, comforts her.

This is all very touching but I wonder who Olivia's bleeding on. It had better not be me. We should probably get her medical attention.

HEY LOOK IT'S THE KING’S GUARD late as always.

I think it's all those edits but I cant help interpreting Liam's neutral face as sarcasm now. ‘Yes Bastien. We're here and fine :| So nice of you to show.’

Nah Bastien, screw propriety, you go ahead and yell at your foolish king. You can be his dad now. He at least should’ve had some kind of backup plan.

Honestly I’m thinking Bastien’s gotten so rusty not having to watch out for Leo that sneaking away was probably super simple for Liam.

Whelp, back the party! 

Awwww Reginaaaa ;-; Liam YOU JERK IF YOU DIED YOU WOULD HAVE LEFT HER ALL ALONE

Well. Alone with Leo. ...well. 

BERTRAND IS HUGGING US BOTH. ON PURPOSE. THIS DAY IS SO BLESSED. 

My dog! hi baby!!!! 

I am a sucker for every time they pull the “who’s a good boY!!!??” ":o?” “IT’S YOUUU” god I love doggos. 

Hell YES THIS IS THE TIME FOR DANCING. It’s called a victory dance for a reason. 

Drake just said the words "Maxwell is right." While smiling. what even is this day

We get some pairs interacting! 

Penelope and Kiara are always the best :D 

neville is like still fukkin here for some reason??? roast him madeline 

Regina and Olivia share a nice moment :) 

Olivia is still bleeding and annoyed about it. Olivia..... babe........ maybe like....... lie down a bit.............

Team Riley has another sweet moment~~~ 

Ok this is all very nice but Riley has gotta be getting tired and she still needs to bang Maxwell to within an inch of his life. When is that happening. 

FINALLY Madeline comes up like “hey ok I’m resigning my position as your official cockblocker, go, leave.”

girl ARE you serious. Are you. I GOT KIDNAPPED PROBABLY BC YOUR COCKBLOCKING SHENANIGANS WORE MY GUARD DOWN, AND NOW HERE YOU COME ok you know what I'm taking it

Riley: *GRABS MAXWELL AND THROWS HIM OVER HER SHOULDER* BYEEEEEE

Finally alone!!!! bless 

You have the option to succumb to giggles or tears or jump in his arms, and while I picked laughter because this whole thing is absurd as hell if you go for tears, he is very comforting and he gets many points for that. ♥

whelp, here they go. (this isn’t going to get detailed, don’t worry/sorry) (lol)

Different music than normal! It's the sexy club track instead of the '😏 yee we're getting busy 😏' ones. I like it! Sets the tone for this very well, it's celebratory! We are well past anyone needing to be seduced. In one option Maxwell jokes he's glad you guys got advance practice in (lol), and the difference here does show. Neither of them are trying to impress each other, this is pure culmination of 'I love you, I want you, we went through hell for this, get over here.'

I appreciate that even though Maxwell likes to be on top, every time he brings them to the floor or here with the couch, he cushions her fall. Sweet as hell. 

He's back in his fucking jeans I can't djdjjfjgjgjg 

if they’re so determined not to make him one with boxers, at least get one with the fancy pants. It doesn’t even have to be the same fancy pants, just like. try slightly harder. 

There's no way I was wearing that bra under that dress. 

Ok this recap is going to fade to black here.

...

Maxwell, I know we’ve got to work on your self-esteem, but you can’t give me credit for the sex, it’s a team effort. (and let’s be honest it kinda seems like he does most the work. Not that I’m complaining.)

Maxwell, whilst being adorable, accidentally flings his ring off and freaks out. Don’t even worry about it man, do you know how many rings I’ve just left on sinks in public bathrooms? I was happy with the dang twig 

.............he got 

he got us ROSES im

Mmdmmfmdn

this almost makes up for that dirty trick  they pulled on us at the beginning of book 2. 

Did

He

Write us a poem???

Flowers and champagne and mood lighting... babe it’s like you're about to propose all over again.

ok it was not a poem but it was...……………...very good and destroyed me

G o o d b y e  I love him so much

I want to physically fight the entire Cordonian court for making him think he wasn’t worth it. 

The amount of self-depreciating things he says with a smile on his face is.... unacceptable. 

Luckily he has Riley now and she’s damn well going to spend the rest of her days helping him build up that confidence he deserves. 

this entire scene is my cause of death. it’s been an honor and a privilege. 

♥♥♥

♥♥

♥

actually

speaking of 

the logical part of my mind felt like 3 books was a good place to bring the story to completion, but now that it’s becoming a reality...……… I’m not ready. :( 

[jackalsprey]

Shit, guess it's my turn XD Yeah, I singled you out, you're the only person I know with a completely unique universe you created! No offense, Mac, Shu, and Dusty, your ocs are awesome, but Pen's the only one with something like Paper Guard. Anyway! My things! Now I'll finally get to rant about Pharaoh and Greek Tragedy! The Pharaoh Chapters haven't gotten that much attention, should I plug my original stuff more? DAMN IT I'M ALREADY SIDETRACKED. QUESTIONS. GO. Also, major spoilers in case you are interested in these stories.

Can I quickly point out? Aside from Zeratina, ALL MY CHARACTERS I REFERENCE HERE ARE VARYING FORMS OF POC! Mario's Latino, Ashari's Hindi, Minerva's a mix of a lot of different races, Kaiba's Egyptian. So, if by some miracle, you guys make art of my characters, DO NOT WHITEWASH THEM. ONLY THREE OF MY CHARACTERS, ACROSS ALL MY STORIES, ARE COMPLETELY WHITE. AND I WILL SPECIFY THEIR ETHNICITY. GET IT RIGHT.

Favorite kind of hero? Tragic, unexpected, anti-hero, etc?

A well-written anti-hero. Examples: Discord from MLP, Deadpool from the MCU. Someone who has a decent moral compass, but also has no scruples in doing what they need to get the job done. They can cause harm but still feel bad. but, because they're probably a dumbass, they'll do it again. If we're going by DnD alignments, Chaotic Neutral.

2. Favorite kind of villain? Insane, sympathetic, the one who's actually right, etc?

A villain who didn't ask to be a villain. This character type fascinates me to no end, especially since it's not one I see often. Someone who got possessed, or twisted by manipulation or promises of power, and ended up being the villain in everyone else's story. I'll go back to MLP for this one, King Sombra. Specifically in the comic FIENDship is Magic #1. Spoilers, but in that, when he was like, 9, it was prophesied that he would become a vicious monster. And he tried to fight that fate. But in the end, his fate was chosen for him by others. That kind of villain is so interesting, I wish more people would utilize it.

3. Favorite character you've created, personality wise?

Gotta be my girl, Zeratina. I haven't talked too much about Greek Tragedy, but it's a story I'm so fucking proud of. Again, can't spoil too much, but I'll say enough. Zeratina is a fucking BADASS. This girl is only 16 and she lives as a thief in Ancient Greece with her massive, dumbass older brother, who is GORGEOUS, can fight better than her ultra-strong brother, and is a sass machine. She takes no shit, she's a jokester and a prankster, a bit flirty, and she KNOWS she's a total catch. I love her so much.

4. Favorite character design? (Does not have to be the same as 3.)

This is a tie between two characters from Pharaoh, ironically mortal enemies: Ashari and Minerva. Both of them are badass threatening ladies who are both ex-girlfriends of my MC Kaiba. Ashari's design is good in just how simple it is. She wears a brown long-sleeved top, brown combat pants, and knee-high brown boots. Also fingerless gloves. That's it. But she still stands out; she's got cherry red hair, and bright green eyes that have fire for pupils. (Not literally, they're just shaped like flames.) Under her eyes are tattoos with an odd shape, but look kinda like fire too. She's gorgeous in both her uniqueness and her understatement of herself. (Also, she's really buff.)

Minerva is different. She's a princess of the Greek underworld and dresses the part with a long navy blue cloak over her blue dress, a necklace with real-life skulls hanging off it, gold bracelets, the whole enchilada. She's gorgeous too. Shoulder-length black hair, dark skin REALLY tall, like, 6 foot, but the most interesting thing about her is her eyes. They're all blue. And I don't mean just the irises, I mean EVERYTHING is blue. The sclera, the pupils, everything is varying shades of blue. It's both beautiful and kinda terrifying to look at. She's got the beauty of a supermodel: incredible, but way too intimidating. She's also buff, not as much as Ashari, but still really buff.

5. Least favorite character you've ever created/designed? As in, the most unsatisfied with the final product.

Selma. Selma is Kaiba's head servant and pretty much her best friend. I love Selma, don't get me wrong, she's a sweetheart and I lover her interactions with Kaiba, but I feel like I haven't developed her herself. It feels like she's not a human being, just a tool for Kaiba to have an outlet. And that goes against what I'm trying to cause their backstory is they're trying to build a more friendly relationship cause Kaiba treated Selma like a bitch in the past. I want to make her into her own person, not just her pharaoh's therapy dog.

6. Any characters you used to love when you made them, but now cringe at the thought of them? (We all have that embarrassing furry OC we made when we were twelve...)

Eh, mine's not a furry OC, but it's about as embarrassing. A Ninjago OC by the name of Icelyn Rosenburg. (I still love her name.) I thought she was cool when I made her, but dear god, she was a Mary Sue if I ever saw one. Cringeeeeeeee.

7. Other way around; any characters you didn't like when you made them, but now love?

Funnily enough, my main OC! A lovely half-human, half-jackal pyromaniac by the name of Mario! Don't even think about making the joke. I get enough of it from the idiots in VPV as is. He's basically me if I was cooler, hotter, had fluffy ears and a tail, and I had access to lots of bombs. I just doodled some crappy doodles one day and lo and behold, he was born! I didn't like the doodles, but the idea stuck.

8. Favorite species of character? Human, elf, fairy, etc. You can also include species you've created, you'll just have to explain what it means.

People with animal parts. Ears, tails, wings, etc, as evidenced by Mario and Kaiba. Yes. It's cringey. I know.

9. Favorite attributes to give a character. Physical ones, I mean.

10. Any tips for character creation that other people might want to know?

DON'T LET IDEAS PASS YOU BY! Some of my best characters have been made by me just fucking around with random story and idea generators. Even if it seems like shit at first, put it somewhere you'll stumble on later! It may turn out to be one of your best ideas yet.

YO! @penname-artist

I’M TAGGING YOU WITH CHARACTER SHIT! ANY CHARACTER, PAPER GUARD, WOC OCS, ANYBODY, GO

Favorite kind of hero? Tragic, unexpected, anti-hero, etc?

Favorite kind of villain? Insane, sympathetic, the one who’s actually right, etc?

Favorite character you’ve created, personality wise?

Favorite character design? (Does not have to be the same as 3.)

Least favorite character you’ve ever created/designed? As in, the most unsatisfied with the final product.

Any characters you used to love when you made them, but now cringe at the thought of them? (We all have that embarrassing furry OC we made when we were twelve…)

Other way around; any characters you didn’t like when you made them, but now love?

Favorite species of character? Human, elf, fairy, etc. You can also include species you’ve created, you’ll just have to explain what it means.

Favorite attributes to give a character. Physical ones, I mean.

Any tips for character creation that other people might want to know?

Anyone else who sees this, you may do this if you so wish! And Pen, I swear to god, IF YOU BACKTAG ME-