#also neil needs an outlet and since he will never ever go to therapy i think he would find relative peace in songwriting

[casstelli]

neil josten needs a hobby that isn’t exy or his boyfriend so i’ve decided he plays the guitar. neil josten in a band. neil josten playing silly duets with his lesbian best friend. r u catching my drift. do you understand the vibe

[elizabethvargassays]

A princess stepsister in therapy 1

DISCLAIMER: this little story I wrote was my first attempt at writing something and actually finishing it. It is an assignment during Neil Gaiman’s Masterclass. It’s kind of long, so I’ll post it in 2 or 3 installments. I hope this can be an enjoyable read for someone. 

1

Today, I have a new patient.

I was told by my assistant that someone working for the Royal Family had made the appointment and asked for discretion even though there is no need for that. As a professional, I never disclose anything the patients tell me in therapy with no one other than them but, I must admit I was curious, I have never heard of someone in the royal family, or someone related to them going to therapy.

However, given the recent events, I think many of them have been left feeling with conflicting emotions. I like the “progressive” approach of seeking therapy than to burying it all in secrecy. It sets a good example. I don’t think this will be public knowledge, but I like that they are actively searching for assistance in mental health.

The kingdom at large has been celebrating the prince’s wedding. For me, as public, it gave me the impression that the family was supportive, as unconventional the union is, it seemed it was a joyous occasion. The groom and bride seemed happier than ever.

My assistant buzzed in announcing that she had arrived and was filling the standard forms that we require to register her as a patient in our clinic. I’ll have a few minutes to check her history before seeing her in person.

Anastasia.

Truth be told, I do not know all the names of the Royal Family members, but that doesn’t matter, what matters is that I want to help her.

She was a young woman, her forms noted that she was on her early twenties. Never had seen any therapist before. She had a living mother and sibling; her father was deceased. Uh!, that’s interesting. It seems she wrote that she had more than one sibling, but she crossed it. Noted.

-Mina, please send her in-

She was a pretty girl, dressed in a light pink ensemble. She seemed tired and that she was having a bad time.

-Hello Anastasia, my name is Dr. Alice Lidell, how are you?- She didn’t reply but looked at me with a sad expression. I talked a little more, told her how I approached therapy, that we could make progress and my goal was to give her tools to be able to feel better. She stayed silent.

It’s true that this can be intimidating. Having someone you don’t know asking questions you may find invasive. It is more of a shock when it was not your idea of attending any session. I wonder if she was forced into coming and see me. The idea of it made me weary, as if this was the case I may not be able to do anything at all.

-Don’t you want to talk to me? If you don’t share this with me, I can’t help you. I don’t want to pressure you. You do seem to be tired and maybe this is not the right moment. We can reschedule if you like. Maybe another time would be better-

She seemed to consider this for a moment. Finally, she answered.

“I don’t know where to start”

-Maybe you could tell me a little about yourself and the reason you are visiting me. –

“Well, my name is Anastasia. Anastasia Tremaine. I admit, it was not my idea coming here and seeing a doctor, but my sister insisted. She said that she didn’t like to see me so sad and that she was scared for me. Even after everything that went down, everything we – I- did, she found in her heart the desire to help me. She cares for me and I don’t understand why.”

-She seems to love you. Families are supposed to support each other. I know sometimes this is not the case, but you seem to have a good support system in her. I’m glad you took her word-

“I am not comfortable with this, to be honest. But is the least I can do. I hope this will help me. The king told them to send us away. He already had somewhere where we would stay and I consider that pretty generous. My mother and sister accepted the offer. I was about to accept when Ella asked me if I wanted to stay.”

She started to cry. I handed her a box of tissues and let her cry. I noticed she tried to regain composure but failing to do so. I told her to let it all out and to breathe, she was in a safe place.

I had already made the connection, and, even if I can’t show it, the revelation only amazed me more. I knew who she was, at least by what the papers published. She is our new princess’s sister. Well, half-sister to be precise. In the days leading up to the royal wedding, which was quite an event, the streets were filled with gossip about the new princess to be.

Everybody wanted to know everything about her. She was quite an enigma for a long time, since her disappearance from the ball and the following campaign to find her. It was an entertaining time, almost every woman, no matter how different she was to the description given, was telling her best friends that she was the one and that the prince will soon marry her. There were many broken dreams (and hearts) once the slipper didn’t fit.

When it was announced that she had been found, the public reaction was of glee and celebration. And intense curiosity. I may say it was a little unhealthy but being in the public eye mostly is.

However, little was known about the soon to be royal. The information given was sparse, at best. We knew her name, Ella. She was the orphan daughter of a wealthy merchant and his wife. And she had a stepmother and two step sisters, who, according to the royal decree, chose to live privately and asked for their names to not be disclosed.

This only caused a storm of gossip and unfounded rumors that my loyal secretary bothered in keeping me up to. I found all of them to be baseless and exaggerated. Overall, the people seemed pleased with the new addition to the Royal Family. She is pretty and seems kind. And the mystery surrounding her upbringing makes her even more appealing for the masses. Maybe the whirlwind of events that happened in the past days are a factor in what has my patient so distraught.

Anastasia had composed herself. She apologized for the “scene I witnessed”. That alone spoke volumes. It showed a person that was taught to always show a particular image and she felt insecure now that she couldn’t show it.

-You don’t have to apologize to me, I feel you have a lot of pressure on you. The healthy thing is not to keep it hidden, they will come out one way or another. I can help you with that, to find a good outlet to all these emotions. And to find the root of the negative feelings you have, the ones bringing you down.-

She nodded.

-Good, then let’s just talk and we’ll go from there. You told me that your sister asked you to come. I had someone from the palace made the appointment. I want you to know that nothing you say here leaves this room. I want to ask you a question. Is your sister the new princess?-

“Ella, yes. She is my stepsister. My mother married her father some years ago. We were little, all 3 of us. But Ella and I are the same age. Griselda is a year older than us.”

-Ok, you also mentioned that your sister, the princess, insisted in you to come see me despite everything you did. What are you referring to?-

“I was very mean to her, treated her badly since the day we met her.”

-How old were you when you met?-

“I would have been around 10 years old”

-You just didn’t get along then. Or was there something that bothered you that made you react this way towards her?-

She felt silent for a moment, clearly giving thought on what to respond. Maybe she never ask herself that.

“It’s not because we didn’t get along, I simply didn’t give her a chance. She was really sweet from the starts and I always feel guilty over this. I feel terrible about it. I was scared all the time when I was little. I was afraid that she was going to be favored over us because that’s what my mother always told Griselda and me. That my stepfather would never love us the way he loved Ella because we weren’t his children. That Ella was an egoistic spoiled girl that didn’t wanted to share her father with us and didn’t wanted us there to begin with.

You believe this kind of things when they come from the adults you trust and supposedly care for you. I think I resented Ella even before meeting her. But when I did, she seemed happy to see us. She wanted us to be friends. And I was conflicted.

Also, I discovered that she was lonely, her father would travel a lot and she stayed, surrounded by the staff of the house, all adults, no children to play with.”