#also my first zine!!! cant wait till it gets here

[gammija]

I'm so glad to finally be sharing my piece for the @mycupofteafanzine! Martin is the blorbo of all time so i had a lot of fun drawing him in so many scenes at once, do zoom in to view them

[salfordiansiren]

Interview Questions for Ren Harvieu, God is in the TV ‘In Conversation with…’article

We do like to ask some ‘off-the-wall’ questions, also some slightly tongue-in-cheek and left-field ones not connected to the music business at all. There are also a few multiple questions and I’ve mixed them up a bit so that the subjects keep changing. Many of them are open-ended, giving you the opportunity to be as verbose as you wish.  Please ignore any question you do not wish to answer.

Hi Lauren, my name is David Bentley, I write for a UK-based e-zine God is in the TV (GIITTV).

The objective of this interview, which will be published in GIITTV within a week of receiving your responses, is to introduce you to a new audience in the UK and abroad and to promote your forth on ming album.

The interview will also feature some embedded videos and/or audio unless you ask us not to do that.

There will be an ‘introduction’ to the interview but that will be written after its completion.

Thanks for agreeing to take part.

So, here we go…

 

Hi Lauren, thanks for joining us today. How are you?

I’m in a great mood today thanks. I had foot surgery last week and so I cant leave the house or really move for 6 weeks but I feel strangely calm about the whole thing, I dont mind bein

 

For the benefit of readers who may not be familiar with you, how would you describe yourself as an artist, in a paragraph?

 

 

You have released two singles, ‘Teenage Mascara’ and just now ‘Yes, Please’ from your second album, ‘Revel in the Drama’ which is scheduled for next April and the first one was well received by broadcasting ‘tastemakers’. How does the album differ from the first one, ‘Through the Night?’

 

The difference between Revel In The Drama and Through The Night is that this is a much more personal album. I spent the last couple of years honing my songwriting craft and these lyrics have come straight from my gothic salfordian brain. Its darker, more intense, stranger but still has the beauty of Through The Night. I think both albums sit nicely together.

 

 

Since 2015 you’ve been co-writing with Romeo Stodart of the Magic Numbers and he appeared on stage with you at your recent concerts. Will that relationship continue? Do you prefer to control the songwriting process yourself, or are you content to work with other music or lyric writer(s) into the future? If the latter, who has the final say?

I’ll keep writing with romeo till I die if he wants to. He’s the best of the best, and he understands me. I never really felt understood as an artist till I met him. I feel so comfortable in his presence that I let it allllll out, not just the versions of me t

 

You signed with Universal, a huge corporation, as a 17-year old. Is that too young, or are there any benefits in being ‘bloodied’ in the industry at such a tender age?

I think I was too young, although Universal were great that wasn’t the problem. But there was a lot going on behind the scenes that I was dealing with. I wasn’t a show biz kid from a showbiz family and I had real problems that seemed bigger than singing about about being dumped by some boy. I felt too young and overwhelmed but also too streetwise and smart for it all. It was a confusing time.

They say that everything happens for a reason. In 2011 you suffered a life-changing event, just as your debut album was about to be released, and one which set you back several years. Eight years on do you think the dreadful accident in which you broke your back has had any positive repercussions?

I think there had been positive repercussions,I dont think I would have started writing if it wasn’t for the accident. I dont

 

What attracted you to signing with Bella Union for your new album?

Well

 

Do you have any role models in the music business? A hero or heroine? Anyone you would enjoy being “mentioned in the same breath” with? (Dusty Springfield comes to mind, also perhaps Shirley Bassey).

 

I really admire Fiona apple because she does whatever the hell she wants. And her records are stunning, unique and completely un compromising.

You are compared occasionally with Elkie Brooks (I’ve done it myself!), a different kind of singer perhaps but a highly respected one who hails from the same city, and even the same suburb as you. And she’s still performing, in her seventies. Is there anything you feel you can learn from her and, indeed, are you ever in contact with her?

I dont know Elkie personally but I love her shes a legend. Rising Cost Of Love is my jam!

 

 

You left Salford and relocated to London a while ago. Do you miss it? How did the move impact on your creativity?

I really miss the north, everything about it but I needed to leave because I was really sad and I knew if i didnt do something soon I was going to slip down the back alleyof my mind and maybe disappear forever. I have memories on every street, bus stops make me emotional. Corner shops where me and my friend would try and get booze in our school, theres just memories everywhere and I needed a clean break. To create some distance so I could write about it

When you’re writing, how do most of your songs start life? A piano part? A chord? A melody? Does inspiration simply come, or do you have to seek it?

I feel inspired everyday by everything. When writing a song I like to visualise it, like a film, frame by frame. Sometimes I move around, dance, put on voices. Romeo will play something off the cuff that’s so beautiful that I’ll just start shouting and laughing and hugging him. Its the closest I get to spirituality. Writing wise, I want the narrative to have as much depth as possible, I want to feel something and I feel it is my duty to give the emotion and the stories the respect they deserve. I take it very seriously.

 

Do you see yourself as a live artist, or a recording artist, or both?

I see myself as both. I get to appease the introvert in me by being in the studio and attend to the outrovert by playing live.

 

How would you personally measure ‘success’? By ‘breaking’ America? Or something more modest?

Success to me would mean I get to create and perform music for all time and make a living on it. Success to me would mean that people are touched and moved by my music. I would love to be a voice to someone that can comfort them, just as say Rufus Wainwirght was to me when I was a depressed 14 year old. I’m not doing this just to stroke my own fragile ego, I genuinely want to reach o

 

When I saw your show at the Deaf Institute in Manchester recently, in one song (I think it was ‘Cruel Disguise’), you reached and sustained a note that convinced me and those in my company that you could probably tackle opera singing. Do you have any ambitions to perform in that or any other genre?

I would love to learn opera. I think

 

Back in 2012, while you were recovering, you performed several James Bond film theme tunes with the BBC Philharmonic Orchestra, including ‘You only live twice’ and ��Nobody does it better’, both of which arguably could be applied to you. Do you picture yourself as a ‘Bond girl’ in the sense of recording the theme to a future movie, or do you even have any acting ambitions to actually play such a role? After all, the new album is constructed so that you can “revel in the drama of my life” as you say. (Incidentally, a female friend of mine – also from Salford – commented that you look like a 1950s Hollywood movie star).

Tell your friend I said thanks a lot! I would love to sing a Bond theme, I feel like it could happe

Acting wise I’m open to it, why not?

 

I saw one of your Christmas Special shows at the Soup Kitchen in Manchester in 2015. During the show you told a story about how a school choirmaster prevented you joining a musical assembly on four occasions for no better reason than that there was something about you that he didn’t like. Your rejoinder to that was “Well, fuck him” and of course you soon went on to release demos on MySpace which were picked up by a local manager and sent on to Amy Winehouse’s producer. The rest is history. A new song, ‘Little Raven’ was written cathartically as one to your younger self when you had no label and didn’t know if it would ever be recorded. What advice would you give to young people who find doors being slammed in their face as that schoolmaster did to you?

If anyone is picking you, school teachers, other kids, parents, anyone i would say to

If schoolmasters are singling you out and picking on you, its probably because your different and they cant stand

 

 

What touring plans do you have to support the release of the new album?

We are organising a tour right now around the UK, quite a big one its really exciting. I also cant wait to tour outside of England, I’ve never done that.

 

If you weren’t a musician what would you be? Do you ever aspire to being ‘something else’ entirely (model, politician, footballer, train driver…?!)

I think I’d try and be a fiction writer. I love books and stories and characters. I heard Donna Tartt say something life ‘as much fun as it is to read a book, writing one is one level deeper’ There’s something about losing myself into another world entirely that really appeals to me.

 

The environment. Whose viewpoint are you closest to? Donald Trump or Greta Thunberg?

 Greta or course.

United or City?

United

 

Coronation Street or EastEnders?

Corrie

 

Thanks again and good luck with the album and your future career.

[amazingjackthefactfinder-blog]

It has begun. The blog that will bust the doors wide open.

I’m sure you’ve heard of muck raking and I am not one for buck taking so the buck stops here. I am going out into the world to finally once and for all get to the bottom of all the nonsense and do some cold hard journalism. Pie a la mode style. Meaning i may have a cold creamy gal riding on top of my crisp apples... but watch out she bites. She is one icy B and a half. Nevertheless I will go on to announce that as a promise to my never ending ever growing swarm of listeners I never sacrifice my integrity for a back alley handy and a warm plate of dessert. One other thing I would like to mention is that my theme songs will be extensions of my soul and eventually will amass to form a discography intent on making any record collection obsolete whether it be a slew of Blondie and Barbara Streisand Albums or the record collection owned by Kenny “The Tits” Daffledinger. When asked why they call him “The Tits”, “The Tits” replied “Well Jack, I’m what you could call a connoisseur. I don’t buy nothin’ unless it makes this phrase pop out of my mouth, ‘Oh lawdy lawdy I do declare these be the tits what my eyeballs oogly googly googling at’ I must say that 8 or 9 times a week, and that’s just while I’m out with my grandma.  I am also a certified fan of the female anatomy particularly of the booby area so I’m goin’ for a 25% tranny swap under the hood if you know what I mean.” I reply, “No Kenny, but go on, I am enthralled.” Kenny adamantly exclaims, “Well tell me this now Jack, WHY is it that girls get to have sweater puppies when my apartment complex wouldn’t even let me have a pet rock. WHY is it that man has not yet evolved to lactate? AND WHY have you never just racked on a pair of 36 C donkey pillows and gone with the partial sex change. Aint got shit now Jack where are your answers? Well ill tell you what, my chesticles will never see the light of day with you in the room that much is for sure. These are my Tits. I am The Tits. My tits are the Tits so call me Tits, remember... The one with the bangin butterscotch hard candy nipples.” And that was all “The Tits” was willing to share with us that day he said something about pollen in the air and ran off to get some alkaline water from the water store just adjacent of the senior citizen version of hooters, droopies on Mackeral Blvd.

An introductory message and guarantee of service by The Amazing Jack himself.

This is the Amazing Jack reporting for reporter duty. This is my Manhattan Project. An adventure so death defying and deplorable yet heart warming and soul filling it will shape the fate of the world in the same fashion Chicken soup for the Soul gave you a faster decision on what to read while dropping brown. Remember Heroes live forever. But legends never die. And the hallowed reporters creed states “Never shy away from a task so daunting it seems like trying to floss a lion’s back molar when the lion is suffering from a toothache.” (Reporter Creed: subsection 34N-fi-alpha-4) Danger and a story so juicy you’ll be asking if this is an expose on Wrigley’s Juicy Fruit gum. But thats far from the case this path on which we are about to embark is something much more life threatening and repulsive. And we reporters get off to that shit. So to recap Heroes forever, legends immortal. Reporters? They just inject the Novocaine and root canal that overgrown house cat till our restless minds are at peace once more.

With great power does not come great responsibility in reality alongside great power comes manslaughter government corruption and if youre lucky a sweet chopper with a wicked amount of horsies pumpin through the engine. All of which I have leads on and the resulting stories will eventually put your ass where your hat goes with the shistorm of raw unfiltered news that comes in your ears and plops its balls on your favorite addition of home and garden. “Ah hell no not my dream house ‘zine, it’ll be weeks until the next edition, I’m going to march on Washington” You’ll cry as you rally your multiracial family and tell them the news you just heard. But it will be too late old news is cold news so go drink a cold brew and wait for the next delightfully painful kick to the groin that we call current events.

With vengeance,

The Amazing Jack

Legal Disclaimer

(The Amazing Jack is not a registered trademark and is not held down by any one career. Journalistic skills may be lacking as The Amazing Jack is mainly shoe salesman at a shoe store in Southern California, cannot guarantee the sole proprietor  ownership of this title: The Amazing Jack, Amazing is a subjective term, Jack  may possibly not astonish or excite you, Call your doctor if you experience dry heaves or scabies, toxic chemicals have been used in the production of this blog, all animals may seem hurt but realistically that female miniature pincer was just being a little bitch that day, vengeance may fall upon you by someone other than The Amazing Jack and in such cases, swift blows to the kidneys and spleen have been experienced, Warning do not repeat anything you have read on this blog or listened to in our respective fact finding missions, this is of course if you care whatsoever about your social status or the way people rate your intelligence, otherwise take your “given up sweat pants” out of there secret hiding place and binge on all of The Amazing Jack’s content, talk excessively about obscure insider information, and purchase any and all of our non explosive merchandise [Warning product Amazing Jack DIY Dynamite assault charges mislabeled DIY Dynamite Dance Party and military grade explosives were sold in children’s activity aisles all across 8 countries including the US  Mexico and Many Nordic locations.  All sales are final, yes, even for merchandise our LLC charged to any stolen credit card you left in our flagship store/roller derby rink, The owner will find a place for the 17 7XL Amazing Jack Daygo Lyfestyle Signature Tube Top Wife beater as it is illegal in all 50 states and us Territories to throw away materials rated with exceedingly high uranium and lead content. [This is a specific but public message about your “stolen” credit card, we are holding a VISA Platinum credit card for Gino Togenclap who claims we here at the The Amazing Jack Production Team have been misusing his identity. This ungrateful piece of filth lives on 3853 Hermdiddle Coast Way, Sweet Lips, Tennessee 38340 Gino tends to be home in the mornings and evenings so for all you scavengers out there only case his residence at this time don’t get those sticky fingers just yet. Use excessive force if necessary to acquire Mr. Togenclap’s  valuables and burn his family photos for good measure. Gino we don’t regret to inform you the new season of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt has come out on streaming networks but our office has been swamped with murky mud water and what looks like alligators and air boat parts so the mail people don’t pick up our packages anymore, this means we must continue our subscription in your name to hulu, nfl sunday ticket, netflix, amazon prime, Omaha steak delivery, the office wide Disneyland yearly passes we each got as bonuses last quarter, also our CFO Tommy Rimshot was saying he was experiencing some mild to sever spinal pain so we had you hook him up with the deluxe weekly package down at Attitude Adjustment, it’s that new chiropractor that took the idea of being sarcastically really mean and bad at his job like the folks down at dicks last resort, Tommy goes down there first thing they do is just hit him with a baseball bat right below his 7 cervical spine vertebrae and they fracture his hole spinal column, then they yell just kidding! Tommy was laughing so hard he was screaming in pain, 6 months of physical therapy with a lifetime of Oxycontin and he keeps saying he cant believe how dedicated the employees are to providing a comical and impacting experience for every customer, he has no idea how they knew he didn’t have insurance and would have to pay out of pocket, well we just put it on your card, you’ve got to try it out Gino, maybe when you get your credit card back, which I highly doubt will be any time this winter, possibly 2019. I can get you a good referral have em fuck up your back real good then fix it, That’s what we do to all of our friends and associates who “Talk too much” anyway this is meant to be a legal document that will hold up in court I better hold all the fraud extortion robbery and forgery chitchat for when i face time you, gotta jet talk to you soon Big G]  Remember we also have a you break it you buy it policy on The Amazing Jack’s patented mustache If you break it you must pay the yearly $89,000 disabled severance from mustache package and if The Amazing Jack may happen to pass away from a sudden spelunking accident, act of nature, act of God, or point blank bullet wound to the facial area after severance from said official patented Amazing Jack Mustache the person/person’s responsible must pay out The Amazing Life Insurance policy Jack took out at age 26. Which is $5,000,000 to each of his 4 children and $800,000 to his pet brown bear to cover room and board along with the domesticated brown bear’s stamp collecting habit.)

Sincerely,

Ron Gotabitabeli

Head of Amazing Jack’s Crackpot Legal Defense Squadron (trademark)