#also more alcohol was involved in this one and that's prob apparent
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Rating BG3 Ladies Oral Game
By popular (1 anon) demand. With a bonus segment, Does She Eat Ass?
Ratings based on vibes and also facts opinions (controversial: not everyone can be a sex god).
all the main and supporting women + my background babes: Florrick, Talli, Alfira, Lakrissa, Araj, Nocturne, Skoona, Adrielle, Z'rell, Nine-Fingers, and special guest star Philomeen
*Sex is like pizza, so average results are in fact still pretty good. Only 2, 1, and 0/10 are truly trash head. So a 5 or 6 is still a compliment!*
Lae'zel: 10/10. Her appetite is voracious. Her will is steel, and her tongue is silver. As a lifelong try-hard, Lae'zel can't settle for anything less than stellar, and eating out is no exception. She can be a bit too clinical with it at the start, but once her heart is freed from its stone prison, her sensuality comes pouring out her lips and tongue.
Shadowheart: 9/10. This is her wheelhouse. This is what she's been up to for the last 30 years. She loses a point because her brand of teasing and/or being coy occasionally doesn't translate; there's a difference between a slow burn and letting a lover go cold, and she can slip up sometimes and forget she's pleasuring, not torturing. But overall? Who knew such a delicate touch could make you come apart like that.
Karlach: 11/10. She's a natural, and she's ravenous. For touch. For affection. To please, to be good. She tunes all the way in. No notes. She's all up in and/or on that thang, front, back, side to side, not a drop left when she's done with it. The most finesse? No, but a hammer doesn't need frills and lace to knock in a nail.
Minthara: 12/10. Even better than her stroke game. It feeds her ego like no other, and what feeds Minthara's ego is also good for her lover. Dominant even when giving head, and she puts that nose and chin to werk. You're done when she's done, not the other way around. Eats 110% of it, leaves no crumbs.
Jaheira: 6/10. Frankly, Jaheira is just not that horny and so, while her skills are well-honed, she just doesn't have that killer instinct to catapult her into higher tiers. She's too busy to spend two hours between someone's legs, so she aims to get it done nice and quick, but thorough. She's no quitter, after all, and her dedication to the goal is unshakeable.
Isobel: 8/10. A little too much of a tease for anyone who's not an edging enthusiast, but she puts her money where her mouth is. She's incredibly in-tuned with a partner, so once she's zoned in, she's got it locked down. Her focus is unbreakable. Doesn't have the most stamina, but she more than knows how to make up for it. You don't need hours and hours for Isobel to take you apart.
Aylin: 7/10 or 100/10 IF her face is being sat on. My controversial take for this post. But I think that while Aylin's tongue is GOATed and she loves pleasing her partner, it's just an act that isn't enough for her. She wants to touch, feel, suck, lick, caress, tease it all, not just a fraction of her beloved. Her hands and tongue wander. She flits around, sampling it all. Keeping her in that one place, on-task, can require some input from her partner, so they can't quite relax all the way and melt under her. This is where the face-sitting specification comes in. Surrounded so, held down (even by someone MUCH smaller), being taken as much as she gives--------- that's where she really shines.
Mizora: -100/10. Again... get real.
Orin: 5/10. She is a rolling stone. She is a whimsical sort. Eating out requires focus that she certainly has, but can she employ it on a dependable enough basis? She can also get too artful with it. Sometimes A->B is the right path and you don't need to murder someone and stash their corpse in an abandoned one-room house inbetween licks, ya know?
Florrick: 9/10. Look at that profile. That nose. That chin. Those lips. Observe her delusional confidence, her endless fidelity, her relentless pursuit of her goals. Did you feel that tremble? It was your [preferred genital word]. She comes home from a long day of bossing people around and serving the greater good, ready to pamper someone, to serve herself, and she's hungry. Her only downside is that she can be a bit efficient with it; it takes her time to warm up emotionally, and not treat you like just another item on her to-do list.
Talli: 8/10. Happy to be of service, always. A very thorough, straightforward, good-game-giving mouth. Lacks creativity, but completely consistent, reliable, and (if desired) romantic.
Alfira: 8/10. A little clumsy, a little distractible, but you can't beat the dedication. Amazing breath-holding capacity. Unlike some other be-fanged women, she loves her teeth and knows how to deploy them. She keeps ya guessing, which does have a few negatives, but overall? More than makes up for her complete lack of stroke game.
Lakrissa: 6/10. She talks a big bigger game than she actually has, surprisingly. She's a little too restless, a little too fidgety. She likes to use more of her body than she can while going down, so it's kind or boring for her tbh. She likes the taste and the emotional/mental experience for herself, more than she likes actually doing it. But for her love? Anything. She'll sit down there for hours if need be.
Araj: 2/10. The future Matron Mother of the Restored House Oblodra does not get on her knees. You try to tell her that there are many other options, but she doesn't listen. Only goes down when she's trying to steal your secretions for her alchemy. It's not worth it.
Nocturne: 7/10. Like Shadowheart, she had to be entertaining herself somehow for all the decades in the cloister so her skills are above average. But she's a little more submissive, and tends to pigeonhole herself; she can't quite pull off a toppy tongue sesh. If she's not on her knees, she doesn't quite know how to do it. Certified biter, interested in the intersection between pleasure and pain.
Skoona: 7/10. A little self-conscious of her tusks, but she's always found the act romantic and fulfilling. Likes to hold hands during.
Adrielle: 3/10. She's a little self-conscious, a little too intimidated. A little too desperate to be good. In one's own head is the worst place to be when trying to go down on someone, and that's where she is. Will get you there, but hardly a world-shaking experience.
Z'rell: 1 Billion/10. Look, it's still not for YOU, but in case you were wondering: at least 17 someones out there are getting it ATE. Front, back, side to side, axes that don't even exist in our plane. You're missing out. Pathetic.
Nine-Fingers: 7/10. Makes your legs shake, but can be a little too intense. She can come on too strong. She can make it feel like a competition, or like there's something else on her mind that's not you. Keeping her engaged is a You problem, but if you can? Very good.
Philomeen: ?/10. She does not go down, ever; she's made that mistake before long ago (making the hoes think she cares about them) and she's nawt gonna make it again!!
In addition: Does she eat ass?
Eats ass completely unprompted: Lae'zel, Minthara, Orin, Z'rell Offers to eat ass: Shadowheart, Karlach, Aylin, Florrick, Nocturne Eats ass if asked: Jaheira, Isobel, Lakrissa, Nine-Fingers Considers it, but decides eating ass isn't for her: Alfira, Talli, Skoona Definitely doesn't eat ass: Mizora, Araj, Adrielle, Philomeen
#nsft#overall these skew high bc these women mostly all have that ��neurotic repressed freakâ vibe that lends itself to throatGOAT status#also more alcohol was involved in this one and that's prob apparent
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tattoos together (2) // tyler seguin
(PART ONE)Â
pairing: tyler seguin x reader
summary: itâs been three years since the fourth of july on the cape with tyler and youâve finally made the trip down to dallas for a visit. some things have changed, some remain the same...Â
(2016 dallas stars and 2/3 of tylerâs dogs, apologies if some details arenât accurate about the stars season. i was too lazy to do my research.)
word count: 5k+
authorâs note: hereâs part two of this fic!!! more to come... please leave me feedback or whatever and reblog/like. thank you for the reaction on the first part! love u <3333333
warnings: more alcohol, more tattoos, prob cursing
June 2016
âDo you really have to go? I mean, you literally just saw him when he was visiting Boston in April.â
When the comment falls from your current boyfriendâs lips, youâre glad that you have your back to him because the eye roll that came after was not pretty. You had to wonder how many times Dan was going to get insecure about your friendship with Tyler before he gave it up. Tyler wasnât going anywhere, in fact he already had. But, apparently, the distance between Boston and Dallas still wasnât enough for your fragile boyfriend.
âThat was two months ago, and it was only one night,â you point out. You shove a sweatshirt into the suitcase and look up at him. âBesides, Iâve never visited him in Dallas.â
âOkay, but two weeks?â he asks. âIt seems like an unnecessary amount of time to visit him.â You donât respond. This is a conversation the two of you have had too many times and itâs exhausting. But, Dan continues, âItâs just weird to me. I mean, he bought you first class tickets to visit. I wouldnât do that for someone I wasnât dating.â
âTyler has been my best friend since 2011. Heâs been with me throughout my undergraduate degree and most of my Masters. Heâs been there each time Iâve been left heartbroken by insecure guys, like youâre being right now,â you state. His eyes widen at the tone of your voice. You take a step closer, crossing your arms over your chest. âHeâs basically a member of my family and he was devastated when he couldnât make it to my graduation last month.â
âCan you just let him have his moment and celebrate with me?â you ask. âYou have me every day and we spent a week celebrating in Cancun. Let him celebrate with me for two weeks and then you get me back.â
Danâs face softens. He reaches out and tugs you forward by the waistband of your sweatpants. You fall into him, fitting yourself between his legs as his hands trail up your sides. He captures your face in his hands and says, âFine. As long as you promise that I get you back, I donât care.â
âOf course,â you state. He tilts his head up to kiss you and you oblige. Itâs short and lacking in passion. When you pull away to grab your toiletry bag from the bathroom, you find yourself wiping his kiss from your lips.
Dan is the second guy youâve dated since Tyler left and heâs outlasted the other one, but you know heâs not your forever. Youâve only been together for six months or so and the fire has already started to burn out.
Besides, you have big plans that donât really involve him, ones that you havenât even disclosed to him yet because youâve been holding out on speaking them into existence until youâre with Tyler again.
Maybe itâs unfair to string Dan along like this, but you figure heâs a nice enough guy that if things really donât go your way⌠At least youâll have him. And, seeing as the past three years have been shit, things donât like to go your way.
You share one kiss with your best friend and, suddenly, youâve thrown off the balance of the universe.
Instead of waking up late on the Fifth of July to make breakfast with Tyler and steal another kiss or two, you woke up at 7 a.m. by a call from your mother. Your dad, whoâd always been in good shape, had gone on his usual morning run and suffered a heart attack just half a mile from your house.
The next few days were a whirlwind of hospital food and neck cramps from sleeping by his bedside. Soon enough, the kiss with Tyler was long forgotten, pushed back to a corner of your mind that you werenât willing to access any time soon.
Tyler was a little ticked. Timing had never been right between the two of you and he finally got the kiss heâd been working so hard for, only for it to be forgotten about hours later. But, he also loved your dad like he was his own.
Tyler showed up on the afternoon of the fifth with lunch for your entire family and ended up staying well into the night, past visiting hours, with you. The next few weeks were much of the same. He even managed to get a few hours alone with your dad when everyone else was at work. The two of them watched baseball on the little TV in the corner for hours on end.
The night before his departure from the city, you went to eat Chinese food on his floor one last time. You hardly made it through your chicken lo mein before sobbing until you couldnât breathe. Tyler had to remove the cartons from your hands for you before pulling you into his chest and holding you against him like a human weighted blanket.
Adjusting to life without Tyler was harder than expected. You never realized just how much time you spent with him until he was gone. You threw yourself into your classes and started spending more time at home with your parents, especially once your dad was back home.
FaceTime was a daily occurrence until it wasnât possible because of hockey season, but you didnât go more than an hour without a text from Tyler and that made it a little bit better.
The two of you counted down the days between his visits to Boston for games and he always managed to get tickets for your entire family to come. You made it a point to grab dinner the night before or the day after his games. Then, he jetted off home or to the next city and the countdown began again.
Itâs not that you didnât want to make the trip to Dallas, in fact youâd had flight itinerary to go on three separate occasions. After your dad was healthy again, the problem with visiting was entirely school related. On the off-chance of freedom during the summers, subsequently his off-season, you were wrapped up in internships and job interviews and family vacations. He begged you to let him visit, but you made sure he spent the summer with his family in Canada.
Your graduation in May meant you had a period of downtime and Tyler wasnât letting it go unused. The night of graduation, Tyler sent you the itinerary for a flight out of Boston in June to visit him for two weeks with a text that read: Happy Graduation, smartass.
Your flight landed around noon in Dallas and, after collecting your bag from baggage claim, you stood outside the terminal waiting for Tyler. It didnât take long for him to find you, dodging around groups of tourists and airport employees to get to you.
As soon as heâs close enough, your suitcase is on the floor and your feet are in the air. Tyler nuzzles his face into your neck, taking in the scent of your perfume. The feather light touch of his lips against your skin stirs something in your stomach that you try to shove down as he murmurs, âI canât believe youâre here.â
After he places you back on your feet, you brace both hands against his chest and trail them up his neck to his cheeks. You hold him in place, studying every inch of the face youâve been missing. He watches your eyes trail over his face, his lips in a soft smile. From an outsiderâs perspective, the two of you probably look like a couple reuniting after far too long a part.
âEvery time I see you, you look older.â Your fingers trail over his jaw line and the stubble decorating it. Tyler barks out a laugh. âHonestly, Iâm pretty sure FaceTime adds a few pounds because you still look like baby Ty whenever you call me.
At this, Tyler shoves you away.
âIâm kidding!â He rolls his eyes at your exclamation, grabbing your suitcase from the floor to tug it with him out the doors of the airport. You chase after him, lacing your fingers in his free hand as he walks. The movement is muscle memory. It feels so normal that your mind doesnât even go to the man waiting for you back home.
You gaze down at his arms, both filled with tattoos now. The whiteness of his t-shirt is a stark contrast against the dark tattoos on his arms.
âYou look great, Ty.â
âThanks,â Tyler responds, lifting your hand to his lips to kiss your knuckles. Heâs about to drop your hands back to your sides, but instead lifts them to look at your wrist. A warm smile finds its way to his lips when he sees the stars on your skin.
The moment doesnât feel platonic, but it is. It needs to be. And there arenât supposed to be butterflies after all this time, but theyâre back. After all this time, theyâre still coming back.
Tyler pulls you out to the Dallas sun and drops your hand when your feet hit the pavement. You follow him to his car, sliding into the passenger seat as he stores your bag in his trunk. When he climbs in beside you, your fingers instinctively reach up to his cheek and poke at his smile lines. He chuckles.
âHow was your flight?â
âIt was fine,â you answer. âFirst class was a little extra, I wonât lie.â
âYou deserve it,â he states. âYouâre a two-time college graduate.â
âYou say that like Iâm a Stanley Cup champion.â Tyler laughs. Using your best sportscaster voice, you say, âYFN YLN, two-time college graduate, spends her bye week in Dallas, Texas with one-time Stanley Cup Champ, Tyler Seguin.â
âHow lucky am I?â
âI have something important to tell you,â you announce as he pulls out of the parking lot. He glances at you, waiting for you to continue your thought. âLetâs just get home first.â
He tries to get it out of you the entire way home, but all you want to do is catch up, so you make him wait.
When you get back to his house, which is bigger than it seems through FaceTime, Tyler pushes the door open and lets out a holler which is met by the sound of paws on the hardwood floors. His two dogs round the corner, butts shaking at the force of their tails. You drop to the floor immediately and embrace them. Tyler watches in amusement, his heart fluttering at how right this feels. It feels like all the pieces of the puzzle are together.
After allowing the dogs to get a good sniff in, you stand upright. You kick your shoes off and walk into his living room, taking in the dĂŠcor and the furniture. Youâd be lying if you said you werenât impressed, but you also knew his sisters and his mother. There was no way theyâd let him leave a place like this undecorated.
Tyler follows you, watching the way you look around and wondering if you like what you see, if this is a place you could see yourself coming home to. But, heâs itching to know what you have to tell him. He clears his throat, calling your attention back to him, and asks, âWhatâs your news?â
âI havenât told anyone,â you say. âNot even Dan.â
âReally?â Tyler asks. He hates the way your admission makes him feel cocky, like a winner. Take that Dan. âGo on. Tell me.â
âI just accepted a job at a publishing house in LA!â
âWhat?â
âIâm not full-time yet,â you inform him. Tyler is grinning like heâs just won the lottery, but he doesnât speak so you continue, âItâs going to get my foot in the door, though, which is huge. Iâve been coming up empty in Boston and Iâve always wanted to live out in California.â
Tyler steps forward and wraps his arms around your waist. You sway as he squeezes you, taking in the warmth of his body and the silence of the room. When he pulls away, itâs just enough to look down at you. His hands stay on your waist. Platonic.
He drops his forehead to press against your own, like heâd done that night in July three years ago, and says, âI am so proud of you.â
âThank you,â you whisper. âIâm excited, but Iâm nervous.â Tyler steps back and falls onto the couch. You join him, sitting sideways to face him. âItâs so far from home.â
âTrust me, I know about being far from home.â
âI know,â you state. âI just feel like itâs different for you. I donât mean to minimize the situation, but you have a team. You spend every day with those guys like theyâre a family for you. Iâll be moving to California alone and itâs not like I can just adopt my coworkers as my family. They have families of their own.â
Tyler doesnât really know what to say, but he tries.
âYN, if anyone can move somewhere and start fresh⌠Itâs you,â he says. âThis is an awesome opportunity and you donât have to stay there forever. Itâs just a stepping stone. Besides, California is beautiful and warm and Iâm already excited to visit you when weâre on the west coast.â
âI needed to hear you say that,â you admit. Your cheeks feel hot and your certain that thereâs a dark red blush on your skin. Tyler notices it and canât stop the smirk that comes to his lips. âMy parents have been waiting to hear about the job offers and my decisions. Theyâre super excited for me. But, I needed you to give me that vote of confidence.â
âYou came to the right place.â He drops his hand to Marshallâs head and scratches, detaching his eyes from your face so his next statement doesnât feel as loaded. âIâm your biggest fan. You could tell me that youâre moving to Mars and Iâd still back you up. You can literally do anything.â
âThanks,â you murmur. Your eyes are still watching him as he vigorously scratches the dogâs head. He doesnât look back up at you. Cash jumps up and places his paws on your thigh. You lean down and place a kiss on the top of his head. The moment you share with Cash catches Tylerâs attention. He watches you stare at his dog before he finally asks, âWhat are you going to do about Dan?â
You sigh, dropping your head into your hands and respond, âBreak up with him.â
âJust like that? No long distance?â
âItâs not my cup of tea,â you state, glancing up at him. âThe long-distance thing is doomed.â
âYou do it with me.â
âYouâre different.â
Tyler smirks to himself before standing up off the couch. He grabs your bags from the floor and slings them over his shoulder. Then, he turns back to you and extends his hand.
âLet me give you the grand tour.â
Tyler tugs you along with him, hand-in-hand, through the halls and into each room. The dogs follow closely behind, stopping short each time you step foot into a new room. Theyâre obsessed with Tyler and you canât say you blame them.
âYou can stay in here, if you want,â Tyler states, motioning the guest room. âYou know I donât mind sharing a bed with you, but Iâm not sure Dan would like that.â
The last stop is his bedroom. He pushes the door open to reveal a light grey room with a king size bed in the middle. His walls are bare except for some Stanley Cup memorabilia, including his old Bruins jersey framed and hung over his dresser. He drops your hand as you walk through the threshold.
Tyler plops your bag on the floor at the end of his bed before dropping himself onto the mattress to watch you scan his room. He asks, âWhat do you think?â
âI love it. Who decorated?â you ask. You poke the head of a Tyler Seguin bobble head and giggle as it nods at you. Tyler chuckles.
âWell, I gathered all the things to put in here, but my mom was the one who organized it all,â he explains. Then, he stands up and walks over to the television stand across the room. He picks up a black picture frame and waves it in the air. âThis is the best part though.â
You walk over and take the picture frame from his hand, smiling fondly at the memory. Youâre sandwiched between Tyler and Jamie Benn in the picture. It was taken the first time he came back to play in Boston after his trade. Heâd been talking about Jamie for weeks, teasing you by saying heâd already replaced you. You told Tyler to bring Jamie to dinner, so you could see what all the hype was about.
Turns out the hype was warranted. You loved Jamie as much as Tyler did.
âMy two besties,â Tyler muses at the photo. You laugh. âSpeaking of Chubbs, he wants to grab dinner and drinks with us tonight.â
âThank God!â you exclaim, placing the picture frame back on the dresser. âThatâs the reason I even came here.â
Tylerâs jaw drops in shock and, moments later, his hands are gripping your waist. He flips you onto to bed, tickling your sides until your eyes are watering from laughing so hard. He grabs your hands and pins them above your head. Itâs then that you realize what a compromising position youâre in with him settled between your legs.
If heâs thinking about it too, he doesnât let on. Instead, he lowers his face so that heâs just inches from your lips and says, âTake it back.â
âDid I bruise your ego?â you tease. He raises his eyebrows, not backing down. âWhat if I meant it?â
âYou didnât,â Tyler pushes. âSo just take it back.â
You stare at him with a grin, but he stares back with his mouth in a tight line. You try to pull your wrists from his grip. It only gets tighter. Then, you stop struggling and allow your arms to fall limp against the mattress. He smirks as your eyes flit across his face, down to his lips, then to his bicep where you see part of his star peeking out.
This isnât platonic, youâre sure of it, but you like how it feels.
You glance back up at him with a mischievous smile and state, âWe canât stay like this forever. Eventually youâll get tired.â
âThen Iâll just lay on top of you until you run out of air,â he answers. Itâs like heâs thought through it all. âYou underestimate me. I have a fragile ego and I donât take insults lightly.â
âYouâd think I wouldâve learned this by now.â
âYouâd think,â he repeats. You sigh. âSay it.â
âI didnât mean it,â you murmur. He smirks and releases your hands, rolling onto his back beside you. You stand up, out of his reach, and say, âI really just came here because you bought me the tickets and I didnât want them to go to waste.â
Jamie Benn played a huge part in the friendship you had with Tyler. When Tyler introduced you to each other during his first season with the Stars, you and Jamie just clicked. He was sarcastic, a little bit mean, but all teddy bear underneath the layers. Think of him like an ogre.
He was brought along every time Tyler hung out with you during their roadies to Boston. At first, you figured it he just wanted you to get to know his new Dallas friends. But, after a while, it felt like maybe there was another reason Jamie came. It felt like Jamie was a buffer.
When Tyler was playing in Boston, there were no boundaries between the two of you. You held hands all the time (Tyler was obsessed with your fingers). He found ways to kiss you whenever he could (usually on the top of the head because that was what he felt was most platonic). You even shared a bed on nights you had sleepovers (which made sense at your place where you only had one bedroom, but Tyler had a whole guest room for you. What was the whole point in sleeping with him then?).
As soon as the kiss happened, and the discussion about it didnât, Jamie was always around. Tyler stopped playing with your fingers, he only ever kissed your cheek hello and goodbye, and you never had sleepovers anymore. It was like Jamie was his own personal conscience come to life.
âAre you still with that guy?â Jamie asks, taking another sip of his wine. You nod in response, mouth too full of wine to answer. Tyler had slipped away to the bathroom just before your food arrived and it took Jamie all of one minute to start his interrogation. âDan, right? How does he feel about you being here with Ty?â
âHeâs a little insecure about our friendship. Well, maybe more than a little, but itâs something he just needs to deal with. Tylerâs not going anywhere. Heâs outlasted even my college friends.â
âInsecure because of that kiss?â Jamie asks. You choke on the wine in your mouth, but quickly grab your napkin to dab at the corners of your mouth so he doesnât register your reaction. He does register it, though. Jamie is all knowing when it comes to what goes on between you and Tyler.
âNo, not insecure because of the kiss,â you answer. âHe, uh, doesnât know about the kiss.â
âNo?â You shake your head. âHow come?â
âI just never thought it was something that needed to be discussed,â you state. âNothing ever came of it. Tylerâs here, Iâm there. It was just a kiss. Itâs not something I need to talk about with him because it meant nothing.â
Jamie doesnât respond, opting to watch you scramble over your words instead. He knows youâre full of shit. That kiss meant everything to the both of you. Tyler admitted it to Jamie himself and, although you never have, Jamie finds you incredibly easy to read.
Tyler comes back to the table, bringing the conversation to a screeching halt. He sits down, blissfully ignorant to the fact that Jamie has shattered the bubble of friendship once again. No one says anything. Tyler just takes another swig of his wine and smiles at you.
When the check comes, all three of you fight over it. Jamie grabs at it first, then Tyler, and when you reach forward to take it, they bark at you.
âYouâre broke,â Tyler remarks while Jamie simultaneously murmurs, âYeah, right, YN.â
The fight for the check is quickly reduced to the two of them. Until, finally, Tyler grunts, âChubbs, Iâm trying to impress her. Let me pay.â
Jamieâs entire body shakes with laughter at the sight of both of your red cheeks.
The check is paid and the two of them whisk you off to a local hole-in-the-wall type of bar. The bartender knows them and even points out a signed photo of himself with them when you sit at the counter. He announces, âMy favorite Stars players!â
âDonât tell Esa,â Jamie warns the bartender who chuckles in return before grabbing two drinks for the boys.
âWhatâll you have, sweetheart?â he asks with a sweet Southern drawl to his words. Your eyes scan down the drinks on tap before settling on a locally brewed ale. Itâs brought to you with a wide smile and a wink.
The next two hours fly by. People come and go, occupying the seats around the three of you and occasionally asking for selfies with the two superstars. With each drink, the line drawn between you and Tyler that separates your friendship from a relationship starts to blur. It isnât until you relocate to a booth on the other side of the bar that you realize whatâs going on.
Tylerâs hand settles on your thigh and he honestly doesnât even realize what heâs doing because it feels so natural for him to touch you again. Dan is out of sight, out of mind for him. Apparently, the distance between Texas and Massachusetts is enough for Tyler to forget.
Youâre hyper aware of the way his calloused palm feels against your skin, unable to stop your mind from wandering when you recognize how large his hand is against you.
When you look up, you meet Jamieâs eyes. He gives a quick look at the palm on your thigh and then raises his eyebrows at you. Subtly, you slide out of the booth to âuse the bathroomâ, but not quick enough to avoid hearing Jamie warn Tyler, âYou gotta stop.â
The bathroom is one single stall. You get in there and look at yourself in the mirror in an effort to pep talk yourself. Either you needed to set some boundaries with Tyler for the next two weeks and squash the tension, or you needed to just deal with the overly touchiness of your friendship without being a shitty person to Dan.
Boundaries never needed to be a thing back in Boston. How are you even supposed to make them now, especially after 5 long years of friendship?
Do you even want to?
Maybe just having Jamie around would be enough to delay the conversation.
As if he knows youâre feeling guilty, Danâs contact pops up on your screen while youâre on the way to the bathroom. You glance up at the boys. Tyler notices your hesitation in approaching the table and watches as you turn away to press the phone to your ear.
âHey,â you greet. âWhatâs up?â
âI havenât heard from you,â he states. âHow are you? Are you having fun?â
âYeah, we grabbed dinner with Jamie and now weâre just catching up over drinks,â you answer. You swing your body back around to glance at the booth. Both boys are staring at you until Jamie diverts his attention back to Tyler and says something. Tyler glances at him quickly, nods, then looks back at you. âHowâs your night?âÂ
âBoring,â he grunts. âI miss you.â
âIâll be back soon!â
âNot soon enough,â he complains. You chuckle at him, but donât reply. âI really wanna keep you on the phone, but I know the boys are just waiting for you to hang up. Iâll let you go. Have fun. Tell them I say hello.â
âWill do,â you lie. You wonât tell them because you know that neither of them really care if Dan says hello or not. âIâll text you later tonight.â
âI love you.â
âLove you, Dan,â you respond. Before he can say anything about the way you dropped the âIâ, youâre hanging up the phone and shoving it into your back pocket.
Back at the booth, Tyler has his back against the wall on the other end of the bench. His arm isnât even within reach of your thigh and Jamie looks like a proud Dad when Tyler doesnât immediately reach over to embrace you.
Around 9:30 p.m., the three of you leave to wander the streets around the bar. Itâs a pretty busy area, filled with bars and restaurants, so people are bustling around the streets either just starting their night or ending it. You walk beside Tyler, inches apart from each other so that youâre close enough, but not too close. Jamie walks behind you two, preoccupied by his phone.
The back of Tylerâs hand keeps brushing along yours and itâs driving him crazy that he feels like he has to stop himself. After Jamieâs scolding at the bar, he knows he canât keep touching you like this, even though he wants to. He falls back a step and pretends to ask Jamie something. Really, he just needs to step away from you for a moment.
You continue walking ahead of them alone. Itâs so warm out, comfortable, and the streets are beautifully lit with string lights. Thereâs music floating from the nearby bars that you find yourself humming along to. You walk two blocks like that, the two of them just a few steps behind you.
Until, suddenly, the wind is knocked out of you as a pair of arms come around your waist. Jamie Benn be damned.
âLetâs get more tattoos!â Tyler exclaims. He pulls you into his chest, bringing your ass against a part of him you try not to think about. The light from the tattoo shop beside you shines on the pavement. You glance behind you and find his eyes fixed on you. âIn honor of your big accomplishment.â
Jamie catches up to you two, stopping short to glance at the shop before looking back at Tylerâs arms around your waist with a knowing smile. You slip out of Tylerâs arms under his watchful gaze and announce, âWeâre getting tattoos. Are you in?â
âI think Iâm out on that tonight,â Jamie says with a chuckle. âBut, Iâll come watch.â
Tyler grabs your hand and tugs you into the shop. Almost immediately, the tattoo artists recognize him. They jump up to greet him and Jamie, praising the two of them for the hockey season. Once theyâre settled, Tyler informs them of the decision you two have made to get a spontaneous, drunk tattoo. And, crazily enough, they agree to the last-minute appointment.
âTyler, what are we even going to get?â you ask. You flip through one of the books of art they have displayed at the counter. Everything is so intricate, beautiful, but theyâre not tattoos meant for your body. You like the small, delicate tattoos.
âYou picked last time,â he reminds you. âI wanna pick this time.â
âDonât pick anything stupid,â you warn. He chuckles, sliding his arm around your back to pull you closer to him. He lowers his face to yours and presses the tip of his nose against the tip of your nose.
âI would never,â he says seriously. He stands straight again, pulling his arm away as you settle back onto the floor. He pulls his phone from his back pocket. âIâm going to Google some ideas.â
âTipsy Tyler and Google are helping you make this decision?â Jamie asks with a grin. âYouâre very trusting of him.â
Tyler rolls his eyes and sits on the leather couch in the front of the shop to browse the internet. He knows what you like, so he doesnât ask many questions for your input. Nothing flashy, nothing big, something that screams YN, he thinks.
While Tyler scrolls through his phone, Jamie leans both of his elbows on the counter beside you. He flicks through the art book and points out ones that he likes, making small talk about what types of tattoos you usually look for. He drops his voice to a whisper, âI canât believe you and him are going to get a second set of matching tattoos.â
âThey donât match.â
âYes, they are,â Jamie argues. âYour tattoos are like pairs of socks. They go together.â
âI never match my socks.â
âI have an idea!â Tyler pipes up. Everyoneâs attention is back to the boy with backwards hat. He stands up from the couch and walks over, Pinterest on full display. You giggle at his method of finding your tattoo. He hands the phone to you and leans against the counter as you look at it. âTheyâre California poppies.â
âItâs pretty,â you remark. The tattoo is a thin black line creating three California poppies in a small bouquet. Itâs delicate, pretty, and totally you. You look back up at Tyler with a smile. âWell, what are you going to get?â
âOne small California poppy,â he answers. Jamie chuckles beside you, thinking how absolutely nuts it is that Tyler is going to get a flower etched onto his skin for a girl. You send a quick elbow to his stomach, but Tylerâs oblivious to the moment shared between the two of you. âI have a spot near my shoulder that needs to be filled.â
You decide to get the tattoo on your ribs, which means youâll have to take your shirt off. Jamie immediately excuses himself to sit on the couch up front. Tyler just stands there dumbly, unsure of what to do with himself.
âDo you want me to go sit with Jamie?â
âNah,â you answer. You pull the shirt up and over your head. Tyler swallows, forcing himself to keep his eyes above your neck. âOh, relax. Youâve seen me in less than this before.â
And itâs true. One time you got so drunk that Tyler picked you up from a bar after a girlsâ night out and you stripped out of your clothes as soon as you entered his apartment. That was four years ago now and ages before the kiss.
You lay on your side, leaving your ribs on full display and tuck your hands under your head. Tyler grabs a chair and sits beside you, finally at eye level.
âI honestly thought you werenât going to pick something this pretty,â you admit. Tyler chuckles, leaning back in the chair to scratch at his stubble.
âOnly pretty things for you,â he says softly. You let out a breathy laugh, shaking your head at the sweetness of his comment. You close your eyes as the tattoo artist draws on your skin with a pen, marking up the spot where your newest art will go.
Tyler watches you, eyes soft and wide. He rests his elbow on the arm of the chair heâs sitting in and drops his head into the palm of his hand, staring shamelessly and without a care that you might open your eyes to see him admiring you.
âAre you going to fall asleep?â
âI might,â you answer. Your lips turn up at the corners just before you pretend to start snoring. Tyler laughs at you and your eyes pop open to the sound. They close again after you get a good look at his giggly face.
When the artist starts inking your skin, Tyler walks around the table to get a better look. He watches the black ink stain your skin and he feels the same way he felt when you got the stars three years ago. He wants to run his fingers along the lines, trace the ink. And, secretly, he wants to kiss it.Â
#tyler seguin#tyler seguin x reader#tyler seguin fic#tyler seguin story#tyler seguin imagine#dallas stars#dallas stars hockey#hockey imagine#dallas stars imagine
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clicks my fingers to no humanly discernible rhythm as i strut bk onto the dash w chara number two!! (itâs me nai bk again bt this time wearing a stick on moustache). bradleyâs pinterest is HERE n u kno the drill mre abt her under the cut n like this fr those Sweet Sweet plots!!
MARGARET QUALLEY / CIS-FEMALE â donât look now, but is that bradley milligan i see? the 23 year old psychology student is in their junior year and she is a rochester alum. i hear they can be brave, resilient, destructive and ruthless, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet she will make a name for themselves living in off campus. ( nai. 23. gmt. she/her. )
aesthetics: singeing a hole in your fishnets with the cherry of a menthol, spitting a pistachio behind the bar just to hear it ping off the nozzle top bottles, lemon in a fresh cut, a war torn poppy standing alone in an empty field, poking bruises, stomping over flowerbeds when thereâs a path right next to it, dangling over ledges just to feel your chest jolt, a snarling rottweiler that should be muzzled, limp feet poking out behind a door, âI PROMISE I DONâT BITEâ scrawled on a name tag, slapping a bald head in front of you at the cinema like itâs a bongo, not owning a single jacket that isnât stolen, driving a stolen car in the wrong lane against the traffic, blowing coke in someoneâs face after asking âhey, does this smell funny to you?â, hair more feral than a wolf cub and eyes smudgier than a coal mine. Â
BACKGROUND:
father runs a gang n strip club in queens called âno angelsâ tht fronts an affluent drug trade, primarily coke. his name is tony milligan n his gang is p infamous around there fr being jst likeâŚ. completely cutthroat n awful. they were nicknamed âtonyâs rottweilersâ by locals bc he bsically has all of these trained dogs on leash at his command n theyâre still a growing organisation tday
heâs pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs likeâŚ.. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse
in terms of more family bkground info her mumâs name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst likeâŚ. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially âguess she didnât love us enough to stayâ. as bradleyâs got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, itâs become pretty clear there was far more to the story.
they had a horrible marriage n tony ws quite violent at the best of times, which didnât help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just⌠not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else on top of tht, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much⌠would look after her a lot n theyâd both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole mess.
anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradleyâs dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just⌠got rid. bradleyâs kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didnât jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt sheâs too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him
when her mum went all of her dadâs cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jstâŚ. a steep downhill decline frm tht point onwards
she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they werenât healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like itâs the only way to remind her sheâs alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n sometimes gets other ppl in trouble too bc sheâs so insatiably reckless
she hdâŚ.2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging sheâs been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly doesâŚ. not kno how to properly emotion
CUT TO!!!! huntington beach. sheâs currently living in a spacious loft above a rly busy bar tht i picture like. p close to campus so a lot of students prob frequent it?? she loves it bc she can sit on the window sill smoking n argue w ppl tht walk past drunk. jst randomly callin out like. nice chest hair Loser. i feel like she hasnât even paid fr wifi she jst uses the barâs free one n like. goes in there expecting free drinks all the time?? is jst like erm? i live here? let me drink? this is my house? aka sheâs. a lot.
her dadâs opening up a new strip club (also called no angels bc heâs trying to lowkey make it like a chain) n heâs only allowed her to make the move bc sheâs overseeing it kind of???? as well as a few guys tht worked fr him back in queens. one in particular called billy hs made the move n heâs a menace so. three cheers fr anarchy!
PERSONALITY:
the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for
once drank a bottle of whiskey, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old manâs front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried
barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%
if she was a coffee sheâd be black with five grains of sugar that you couldnât taste until the last sip
high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin
loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u and u murder a man in cold blood sheâll brawl anyone that says ur guilty
honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes sheâll jst be having a bad day n sheâll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. a minefield!
has the worst luck in romanceâŚ. ever. the majority of her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she kind of has the âromance is dead n love is a lieâ mentality
speakin of which i feel like sheâs bi bt wldnt have dated a girl or anythin. like guys r probablyâŚ. her preference just bc historically theyv treated her worse n she hs a very self destructive personality like that. sexy!
dresses like courtney love, 2014 sky ferreira and a character from this is england had a baby. mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hd kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently sheâs allergic to combs and generally looking presentable⌠relatable content
sheâs v sarcastic. sometimes blunt. kind of has a habit ofâŚ. assessing a person n sheâs quite perceptive bc sheâs been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dadâs expression fr the slightest emotion change. sheâs quite confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever. sort of independent too like she hs a bunch of friends bt she doesnât care abt going out places alone if sheâs in a certain mood n jst wantsâŚâŚ to get into chaos. sheâs probably kind of known around campus bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy
likes: fishnets, stealing cars, throwing watermelons off rooftops and whiskey
dislikes: amy schumer, honesty, yellow tulips and going home
PLOTS:
someone tht got a job at the new strip club her dad opened up in town?? either as a dancer or bartender or whtever. just a forewarning itâs probably gna b a pretty..... seedy and Not That Pleasant environment bc itâs like. a crime hotspot inevitably bc itâs a gang hangout so. ur chara wld truly be in fr a rollercoaster ride to say the least
she deals coke fr her dadâs gang bt itâs more like. a hobby than a steady source of income tht she Needs bc she just likes the thrill of the fact tht encounters in tht line of work can turn sour tbh. a Thrill Seeker! mayb she deals to ur muse??
anyoneâŚ.. sheâs brawled in the past like. sheâs literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someoneâs face fr no reason bc sheâs bored. sheâs probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think thtâs a sexy prospect!
fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship wteverâŚ. ur muse is like like bradley is. a handful)
mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like thereâs probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily Sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n kicked the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it
ppl sheâŚâŚ. Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination
on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesnât kno hw to compute it
um. honestly the worldâs our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!
#huntingtonintro#depression tw#abuse tw#drugs tw#alcohol tw#alcoholism tw#hospitalisation tw#disappearance tw#death tw#grief tw#murder tw#self harm tw#addiction tw#so sry there r so many tws bradleys life hs been. An Experience to say the least
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So a hot take apparently
Aggretsuko season 2 was super weird and i feel wasnt as good as season one??
Spoilers obv ahead
Haida and Fenneko are basically demoted to side characters this season. They are barely involved in the main story other than in 2 eps at the beginning and the very end. Plus they get like, one scene together when in season 1 they were pretty much always hanging out. Plus its weird how Haida is literally told by Retsuko she doesnt wanna date anyone yet, and then she dates in season 2 and hes just not even involved???
Also the other side characters for the most part are forgotten about? Its so weird how many of them just vanish from the show or have maybe a few lines all season.
The drinking also is gone which is bizarre because Haida clearly had alcoholism in season 1. It was affecting him badly and then its just GONE in season 2??
I dunno ill probs say more later.
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numbers divisible by 2 or 3 but not both
sick you Know it was a continual challenge to remember what tf this entails!
2. Favorite thing to wear to sleep?
oh keepin it comfy. like, naked sleeping is fine. shorts n shirts that are lightâŚ..socks i GUESS if itâs cold, i hate winter
3. What song really gets you going?
i have no go-to Anythings. i was just listening to vimh and oh boy that frenetic outroâŚ..it Has the energy
4. Where do you usually eat your meals?
im feral. bed.Â
8. Soft or hard tacos?
Hard
9. Worst way to break up a fight?
you start physically attacking both parties
10. Best thing to say in an elevator of strangers?
nothing!!! elevators are for collective tense silence
14. Socks or bare feet around the house?
in an ideal world i can be barefooted as much as possibleâŚ
15. Favorite board game?
aggravationâŚ..so little strategy, itâs beautiful
16. Do you sleep with the fan on or off?
off unless itâs Real hotâŚi do appreciate some white noise though
20. Last thing you cried about?
well i got teared up about stagedorks again, and will roland
21. At what age did you first have alcohol?
idk it was prior to 21 though that i first consumed spirits
22. Relationship status?
solo production i call it!!
26. Gum or breath mints?
gum
27. Favorite shoes?
i like sandals where youâre pretty strapped in there
28. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
this lâanxiety is a pain
32. Most embarrassing thing your parents have caught you doing?
idk, singing? enjoying things?? at any given time i was just probably reading or something, very uninteresting. for example i could never be grounded b/c i was just always at home probably reading.
33. Last time you had an orgasm?
iâve never come (lmao) closeâŚ.primary anorgasmia club, aka godâs prank!!
34. Celebrity crush(es)?
anytime i like a celebrity well enough itâs like well letâs file this one away as a celeb crush, thatâs the usual order of thingsâŚ. shoutout to all the times i get misty-eyed abt william roland like oh godâŚ..beautiful contentâŚ
38. What color do you wear the most?
uh i guess white but thatâs just like, coincidence. usually i go for blue! yet probably look best in green! lol
39. Favorite season?
summer! b/c i hate winter
40. Umbrella or rain coat?
umbrella
44. Are you a competitive person?
i kinda can be, but i basically never want to be so i just choose to not be competitive lmfao
45. Least favorite color?
uhh i guess if itâs like rainbow rules, either red or yellow. just kinda can be a bit much yknow
46. First pet youâve ever owned?
well as soon as i was born i think there was already two cats around. oh also a border collie
50. Talk about something youâre passionate about.
iâm the haterâŚ.iâm just thinking of things i can go on off the cuff Hater Rants for like 23 min about. everything iâm passionate about iâve already been not shutting up about so like
51. What are some of your hobbies?
thinking about drawing. iâm doing that right now
52. Caffeine? If so, what kind?
iâve never had caffeine Work for me
56. Something that ruins your appetite?
ooh itâs hard. iâm pretty much good re: anything. something put me off for a moment a few weeks ago and thatâs so remarkable i took mental note of it and forgot it.
57. Favorite labels about you?
wow labelsâŚ..all the gay ones are pretty great. and the trans ones
58. Are you a religious person?
no
62. Have you ever told someone you loved them first?
probably?? but i donât really know
63. Have you ever had sex on the first date?
iâve never had the first date, so no
64. Heroes or villains?
uhh heroesâŚthey tend to be betterâŚ..
68. Least favorite vegetable?
i like corn on the cob but not like, creamed corn or just when itâs not on the cob as much. once i had like, steamed lettuce or spinach or something leafy and later on my mom said this never happened and i was like oh it happened. i remember. b/c the texture is a nightmare
69. How many plates can you eat at a buffet?
oh probs a solid three at any given time. or more
70. Favorite dessert?
ice cream
74. Whatâs one interesting thing about your culture?
itâs really a stretch to think i have any culture thatâs actually a culture uhâŚâŚhow about regional linguistics in that iâm from the east coast / near dc but my parents lived in the midwest for ages so thereâs just fun lil things like when you take a store/restaurant name and add __âs to the end and other stuff where i donât realize itâs apparently a midwestern thing even though iâm not from the midwest
75. Whatâs one annoying thing about your culture?
christmas
76. What job would you be terrible at?
anything involving surgery. i Donât have steady hands. all these people around? you have to talk to them?? also, you have to pay attention??? no thanks. also, i donât know how to do it
80. Has your opinion changed on something recently?
not that i can think of
81. Do you always order the same thing at a restaurant or order something different each time?
if itâs a place i frequent enough yeah i like to find the thing i Like and then just order it always
82. Whatâs something youâve always wanted to try but havenât yet?
donât get me started! lol!
86. Whatâs one amazing thing you did that nobody was around to see?
well the first time i parallel parked i had never even like, practiced it before, just read The Theory, and i was alone in a minivan on an incline but i did it anyways
87. If you could change your height, would you?
nah
88. Whatâs something you would rate 10/10?
the way winston says âQ is for âquantitative,â babyâ as well as the fact that he says it
92. Whatâs something you would get arrested for?
not gonna tell on myself like thatâŚâŚ
93. Whatâs your spirit animal?
i couldnât have one
94. Whatâs the luckiest thing thatâs ever happened to you?
probably like never dying in a car crash. oh also eventually having legal ownership of a car
98. Thoughts on the oxford comma?
it only ever clarifies things so iâm pro-
99. What do you hope never changes?
the world having not endedâŚour existence ykno
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Like Space Opera Romance? Do I have a book series for you!
Seeing that Sherrilyn Kenyonâs Born of Blood is going to be published next week, I thought itâs a good time to give push to one of my all time favorite romance series - Kenyonâs The League series aka space opera romance extraordinaire!
Space opera and fantasy are probably my favorite genres and so is romance. And a good space opera romance is very very hard to find. So imagine my love for The League, which features space pirates, intergalactic organizations, aliens, space ships, assassins, genetic modifications, bounty hunters, galactic emperors and the rest. There are only a couple of books in that series that get less than âutter and complete loveâ from me, and even there, I do like them. Featuring Kenyonâs trademark super-tortured heroes and tough ladies who love them, here are the books in order with my very biased fangirl thoughts:
*Â Born of Night - first and arguably still my favorite. Our hero is a half-alien League assassin. OK, make that former League assassin - nobody ever leaves the League (think a military/political organization that controls lots of stuff) but heâs managed, even if heâs been on the run ever since. He does take random jobs to help him survive and the latest one is a doozy - to protect a daughter of some planetary president who various enemies want killed. CAN YOU SAY, BODYGUARD ROMANCE? I knew you could! Oh God, I love this book! Heâs hulking, terrifying, barely verbal and with a horrid background of scrabbling for everything. She is a tiny petite dancer who looks on the bright side but can hold her own in a fight (sort of. She is no assassin.) IS HE WORTHY? (Ummm yes.) Are there birth secrets and space emperors? (Ummmm yes.)
* Born of Fire - Itâs not one of my faves in the series, but I do like it. Hero is alcoholic space doctor (and BFF of BoN hero), heroine is female bounty hunter set to bring him in, things donât go as planned blah blah. I have never loved romances with medical protagonists and apparently space setting is not an exception. itâs a solid book, even if not one of my faves.Â
* Born of Ice - this one is weird because she wrote it before she knew she could continue the series so it involves the next generation and is out of chronological order. Itâs a lighter romance so if bags of angst arenât your thing (though why are you reading Kenyon then?), this is a good bet.Â
* Born of Shadows - space pirates! Amazons! Seriously, do you need to know anything else? Itâs yet another lighter entry thatâs pretty darn fun. Not a fave (angst junkie here) but solid.Â
* Born of Silence - ummm, ummmm, ummm. THIS WHOLE BOOK IS ONE GIANT TRIGGER WARNING AND I ADORE IT. (Also, we now know where BoShadows angst went - here! This book has more angst than five other books put together.) OK, so our hero is named Darling Cruel, so we already know this book doesnât give any f**** what you think and if you are not ready to follow its blend of delicious insanity. Anyway, Darling is a Caronese (planet) Emperor. Which is all well and good except his position is held in regency by his monstrous uncle who has no plans to give it up any time soon. Heâs torturing the populace, and mistreating Darling and fam and is just generally a horrid person. So Darling needs to figure out a plan to get his family safely off-world before any coup and meanwhile heâs doing the Scarlet Pimpernel thing and working with the rebels, wearing combat armor so nobody knows the rebel hero is actually the useless royal everyone thinks he is. He also has a passionate relationship with a lady rebel leader, Zarya who also doesnât know about his double identity. All is OK except due to a bunch of really bad luck, before he can evacuate his family and do in his evil uncle, he gets captured by rebels as himself. They have no idea heâs their big helper and proceed to gruesomely torture him for weeks. (This is probably a good time to reiterate the trigger warning is real - between stuff in his past, which is prob one of the worst romance novel pasts ever, and rebel torture stuff, this is probably the most triggery romance novel Iâve ever read - think Kenyonâs Acheron or Styxx only hero does not have divine healing powers. Or maybe Robin Schoneâs The Lover) His girlfriend, aka the rebel leader, basically pays no attention as to what is going in her dungeons and lets them do whatever. He eventually gets rescued and stitched up by his friends but by that point, the little of his sanity he was holding on to has fled the building and he goes on a well-deserved murder spree, starting with doing in his uncle and culminating with building a tower of skulls of his enemies outside the palace. Man knows how to cheer self up! Anyway, his friends are all !!!!!! and bring back Zarya (who they dumped far far away) in hopes of trying to calm him down...This is delish and angsty and very very insane and I love it, maybe the most in this series because itâs a hardcore h/c angstfest with the whole âheroine is his sole link to sanityâ theme.Â
* Cloak and Silence - Darlingâs gay BFF Maris gets his own book and romance. YESSSS! Maris is one of the few sane people in this series :P
* Born of Fury - a little less angsty that BoS :P OK, a lot less angsty. Hero is sexy rebel alien, heroine a League assassin that is targeting him, true love. Itâs actually a perfect combo of not too much angst and ton of awesomeness.Â
* Born of Defiance - another one of my faves! (I think this, BoS and BoN are my three favorites, though maybe BoL below also belongs.) Our hero is an outcast - who has no social standing or position due to the circumstances of his birth in the very rigid/class-structured alien society (yes, hero is a humanoid alien, so is heroine.) He is basically a tough, unbeatable boxer. Heroine? Felicia is a delicate and beautiful courtesan.Yes, itâs a boxer x h*oker romance. YES PLS. There are royal plots, angst, rescues, and the whole âhe can kill anyone with a pinkie but turns into a leaf in her delicate presenceâ is my kryptonite. Â
* Born of Betrayal - Talynâs parents...I like it but donât love it, tbh.Â
 * Born of Legend - Ohhhh, this book. This book! On one hand I adore it, on the other, continuity-wise it gives me a headache. The protagonist is Julian, the evil twin of the hero from BoN, who also appears and does evil things in some other books. Kenyon tried to do the same thing here she did with Styxx (show evil twin of loved hero is actually not evil) and it worked a lot better in Styxx because she had to bend her continuity in insane fashion and turn some secondary characters from normal to headcases to do it. However, taken alone, this is a fun angsty book.  And I do mean ANGSTY!!! (Not as much as BoS but nothing could be.) Also a doorstopper. Also I am rereading it right now. Itâs so gooooood!
* Born of Vengeance - love princes recovering their stolen inheritances? So do I!
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What it's really like to have an IV vitamin drip like Rihanna
Jet lag. Oh jet lag. For my job I routinely travel to LA and also my god do I experience the transatlantic flight. My body clock is around the store. Wide awake at 3am? Tick. Passing out at the table at 6pm? Yep. Failure to string a sentence with each other for weeks after my return? Aha. As well as no matter just how much I spend/waste on homeopathic oils, immune booster shots and green juices to attempt as well as eliminate jet lag, nothing appears to function.
So when I returned from a particularly difficult trip to LA just recently, which included four days of torrential rain (I know, it never ever rains in LA) and I was provided an IV VitaDrip at The Elixir Center in London to help me conquer it, I couldn't say yes fast enough. Well as quick as was possible given my discombobulated brain.
I have actually constantly intended to experiment with a vitamin drip, which the similarity Cara Delevingne, Rihanna as well as Rita Ora are all followers of. So it must be great right? It involves vitamins being injected straight right into your bloodsteam via an intravenous drip for a choice me up.
The Elixir Clinic offers 17 various therapies, each with a different cocktail of nutrients, which guarantee to deal with hangovers, cholesterol and also even help hair growth (I'm assuming of the head selection). Normal infusions are advised for the best outcomes.
I had actually presumed I would go with the Jet Lag VitaDrip but when I get to 6pm after job (pre a drinks party) the resident registered nurse has various other suggestions. After reviewing my signs (failure to sleep, dull skin, dehydration, queasiness, unclear head ...) she advises I opt for the Mood Assistance VitaDrip (⤠300). This includes high dosages of "really feel good" B vitamins, magnesium, and takes a hr. Apparently it is ideal for "cleansing the body as well as general wellness, leaving you really feeling excellent". Bingo.
Vitamin drip picked I take a seat in a comfy elbow chair in the treatment space. For some unusual reason I had not registered until now that having an IV drip would involve having a needle penetrated a vein in my arm for 60 mins. So it's a little bit of a shock when the nurse tells me she's going to pop one into my appropriate arm. It stings a bit. She holds it in position with clinical tape to ensure it doesn't vacate location throughout my hour treatment.
The needle is attached to a bag filled with orange liquid-- my vitamins. As well as the nurse gives me some publications and says to shout if I need anything.
5mins: Nothing has actually happened.
10 mins: I still really feel absolutely nothing as well as scroll with my Instagram feed to eliminate the boredom.
14 mins: Strange. I begin getting a fizzy effervescent sensation in my nostrils. The only point I can contrast the feeling to is having a Berocca tablet computer pushed up your nose as well as it dissolving there. Not that I have ever tried this yet it's what I envision it can seem like.
20mins: Points are beginning to get interesting. This sensation continues and it really feels rather strange, yet not undesirable, and also the vitamins are plainly going in. Not long after I start to feel very worn out as well as sluggish. I'm so grateful I'm taking a seat as I feel extremely weird, like my entire body is heavy.
35 minutes: Currently the exhaustion goes the opposite way as well as I begin really feeling extremely light headed and spaced out. That am I? Am I truly in the area? Ooh it's intense in right here.
45 mins: The unusual spaced-out sensation has lifted and now I simply feel actually good. That Berocca up the nose point is still there, however in addition to that, I feel outstanding. I'm actually anxious currently to leave the structure and also to satisfy my friends. I feel way much more energised than when I got here. The final 15 mins drag on as well as on and also every time I look at the IV bag it doesn't appear to have actually decreased. Begin.
1hr: The registered nurse comes in and asks me how it was. I feel rather clear-headed and that the taste of vitamins at the rear of my throat is rather odd - evidently this is quite typical. She takes my drip out of my arm and also places a big plaster on my arm to quit any blood loss.
I am still fairly doubtful concerning the entire process as well as for how long this euphoric sensation will certainly last however in all honesty as I walk out of the building I feel far better than I have in months. I have power, I really feel fresh, I am top of the world.
Later on that evening ... When I reach my drinks celebration my friends inform me that my skin looks outstanding as well as I am beautiful. I commemorate my new-found energy and also glowy skin by consuming alcohol every one of the red wine in bench.
The following early morning: I wake up with a horrible hangover-- seems IV drips can not stop that.
Was it worth it? If you don't like needles or are intending on going out boozing, probs avoid. Yet in all the pictures from the night prior to I do look healthy and balanced and also bright eyed, as well as for the next couple of days (as soon as I have actually abandoned the merlot head) I do feel better, and also I sleep better. While I'm most likely not mosting likely to make this a routine point (Zara sale > vitamin drips, soz), it's certainly something I 'd take into consideration if I was really feeling especially drained and also had a big conference or heavy job week ahead.
The post â What it's really like to have an IV vitamin drip like Rihanna â was first seen on Cosmopolitan by Lottie Lumsden
In Toronto? The IV Lounge is a full service IV vitamin therapy clinic offering intravenous infusions such as Myers cocktail, Hangover IV, and high dose vitamin C just to mention a few.
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so the other day i got drunk with coworkers and one said they were probably leaving and i cried because i was drunk and tired and theyve been nice to be since day one even when others werenât
later karaoke which meant more alcohol
after we all split up and i went home and coworker asked if he and another dude could come around which was fine but i was gonna meet them at the station but they ended up at my house
except it was only dude 1
apparently dude 2 was on the phone so i let 1 in
he was saying stuff and idk why but i asked if he was married when i knew he was and he said yes but he hasnât spoken to his wife in half a year and she lives on a completely different island
he then decided it was the perfect time to confess he liked me???
i did say i liked him in return but made it pretty clear that i wouldnt get involved while he had a wife but i think it may have sounded like an ultimatum (me or her) which isnât what i intended (keep in mind we were both drunk, but not completely off our face, it was almost 2am and the whole thing was in japanese so i cant explain myself fully - they dont teach you this shit in textbooks lmao)
like he was saying if he left his wife would i date him??
i didnt outright say no for some reason (i think i was shocked??) but i was like âwell, id feel bad for your wife, itd be difficult, i dont think my boss would approveâ (they want us to stay in the city but not permanently lol)
dude your going to be moving back with your wife (more than likely), you think its okay to cheat on her so why wouldnt you cheat on me? also what if you have a kid? (hes 10 ish years older) like i dont want to be responsible for any kid at my age, let alone one that is probably half my age! also, divorce isnt super common and if the kids classmates (assuming he has a kid) found out that his parents divorced so his dad could go fuck a foreigner that much younger than him, theyd probably be super bullied
when i told my friends they acted like it wasnt a big deal and if he left his wife it wouldnt be my fault, but this shit has been eating at me since thursday. in all honesty hes staying with his wife just because, so he probably should leave if his heart isnt in it, but i also dont know if its true that he hasnt spoken to her
i dont want to over react, but i think its kinda shitty that he used the other guy as an excuse to come over (because i would not have said yes to one guy alone coming over) and that hes willing to be such a shitty person. also, the fact that he thought i would hook up when his married says a lot about what he thinks about me. and who wants to start a long distance relationship? like, changing from ânormalâ to long distance is fine, but starting like that is weird imo
my friends said he probs just wants to get to know me better and its?? we sit across from each other at work, there was no excuse to not get to know me before hand? and they were like âisnt it nice to have someone like you?â well sure. but if we struggle to communicate thats an issue, right? and tbh, if hes willing to leave his wife, thats a big step for just dating
i dont know maybe im rambling or whatever but its got me shook and i dont appreciate being put in this situation :/ hopefully hes sobered up and realised it was a bad idea (its been four days since ive seen him and we havent messaged) and he wont bring it up again. so i hope hes moving so i dont have to deal with it because i honestly dont know how to say âhey youre being kinda shittyâ in japanese and explain the whole thing :/
if youve got thoughts im happy to hear them lmao
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He Was Never Mine to Have
Iâm gonna get this off my chest.
I broke up with Cyrus a week before tech week for my collegeâs theater. I wasnât happy and wanted to break up. Thatâs about all I have to say about the matter.
So tech week happens and the show happens and Friday night after our first show we have a cast party. Thereâs booze. And traditions that involve booze. So I get a little bit drunk, but not really because it stings bad.
Thereâs a boy I kinda had a crush on, but I was like âmeh, he probs likes my friend Al better than me since heâs known her better for longer so ye not gonna do shit about this plus I just broke up with Cyrus so timing is not that good.â Gonna call him Tech cause heâs a techie like I am.
Traditions come and go and Iâm a little bit unsteady but bored sitting in a chair in the corner so I go into the kitchen where Tech is, along with a bunch of other people I know, and I get water, talk to people. I eventually end up kinda in a corner, against a wall. Tech is on one side of me, pretty drunk by this point, and weâre chatting with a circle of people I/we know. And as weâre chatting, Tech keeps sliding his arm around my waist and such, and Iâm kinda like âholy fuckâ but donât do or say anything cause itâs not like I mind.
At some point Tech goes around to my other side so Iâm more in the corner now and keeps pulling me close and such, while meanwhile Iâm given a shot of vodka because people think Iâm lame when it comes to drinking. (I am. I accept this fact and I really donât mind.). And when I was hesitant about drinking the shot (it smelled kinda like rubbing alcohol tbh (and another kid said it was shit vodka but heâs also kinda an alcoholic in my opinion so whateves)) Tech just kinda pulled me against his side and was like âItâs okay. Iâm right here for you.â Like fuck man okay.
Then Tech leaves to go do something, and a boy I know from physics class takes his place startlingly quick, and starts pulling the same moves as Tech. Iâm just like âokay dude, Iâm not really feeling itâ and move away as best as possible seeing as Iâm in the corner, weâre talking to other people, and I donât want to make a scene. He got the point and laid off. Not really the entire point of this story but just another thing to get off my chest.
Tech doesnât return to the corner, but I see him go back into the living room (sorta. The only thing separating the kitchen from the living room was a counter, and he sat kinda by the counter but not at it). Iâm kinda bored with this conversation and a little bit wanting more cuddling with Tech so I excuse myself with the intent of rescuing a plate of popcorn I had procured earlier in the night. (I later realized that was basically the last of the popcorn, so yay for that staying untouched XD).
I get the popcorn and cross the room to Tech and offer some to him. I have a bit of reputation of hoarding food and offering it to people at these parties, so it wasnât really a weird thing to do. Tech, being a major klutz (he tripped up the stairs going to the party before he was even drunk) managed to spill it and we laugh about how klutzy he is, since he had relayed the sober tripping story to me at the beginning of the night. I sit down next to a tv stand that holds the stereo, next to the (low) chair Tech is in, and he slides down so heâs sitting next to me and wraps his arm around my waist again. Iâm just like âfuck it, Iâm drunk enough and single again, Iâm going to enjoy whatever happens,â and just lean against him a bit.
My memory is a bit fuzzy so I donât quite remember how it happened, other than Tech was touching me, and then at some point he just pulled me close and kissed me. And Iâm like âwelp even in best case scenarios this wouldnât be happeningâ and I kiss him back because yeah Iâm kinda pretty attracted to him, Iâm drunk, so why the hell not. He ends up falling over so heâs leaning against his former chair, drags me with him, so weâre kinda spread over the floor and Iâm laying on top of him, basically cuddling him and occasionally kissing him and kinda making out. And he mumbled stuff in my ear, and I couldnât hear most of it because of the music, but I remember him mumbling, âI really like you.â And Iâm eloquent as hell so decide to say back âsame,â meaning, yeah I kinda really like you too, but I donât think he really heard or cared cause he kissed me again like two seconds later.
So itâs about 1:30 in the morning and my parents are coming the next day to see me, so Iâm thinking I should go soon. Tech tries to get me to go home with him and I say no because of the parents (and thank god I did). He asks if I want to go out to the lobby (weâre in a dorm) and I say fuck it and tell him sure, but I wonât be coming back to the party. So I gather up my shit and say goodbye and we leave, Tech stumbling down the hallway as I laugh at how uncoordinated he is. The lobby was one way from the room we were in, my exit was the other, and I naturally went towards my exit because I wasnât very familiar with the dorm. We realize our mistake at the end of the hallway, but eh whateves. The hallway ends in a little L, with the housekeeperâs room at the end of the L, so Tech pulls me back there and we end up making out. Heâs unsteady so he slides down the wall and pulls me on top of him. Gonna be honest that was the most fun Iâve had kissing a boy, because we were teasing each other and he was sweet and called my eyes pretty and we told each other we really liked each other and sometimes when we kissed he would yank me close and make little moaning sounds and it was pretty fucking nice. And Iâm basically flirting my heart out with him, even as I reluctantly start untangling myself from him. He teased me for being responsible. I said I tried.
I remember at one point we were standing again cause I was trying to leave and heâs probably a head taller than me, so I was on tip toes to kiss him and he was leaning down, and I just mumble âYouâre too ridiculously tall.â âShould I get on your level then?â Tech kinda smirked and slid down so he was level with me. âFight me.â I mumbled the words while he pulled me close to kiss me again âAlright. How you gonna do that?â âIâll punch you in the face.â âGo ahead then.â He was smirking again. âI donât particularly want to right now. Thereâs better things to doâŚâ I just trailed off and didnât finish my sentence in favor of kissing him.
Iâm about to leave, finally have my jacket on and zipped and purse over my shoulder. âDo you have to go?â Weâre still leaning against each other and heâs tugging me close to keep kissing me. âI should try and be responsible and sleep.â I let him pull me back. âPlus parents.â âYou donât want to leave, do you.â âMaybe.â I kissed him again. He tried to get me to stay, to put down my things and sink back to the floor, but I pulled away with a laugh, teasing about how he was trying to keep me there. I started to walk off, but decided against it halfway to the door and walked back to kiss him hard. We made out until he nearly fell over (and dragged me with) and we laughed, kissed a couple more times, and I finally said goodbye and left.
Iâm bad at confronting people. I tried not to make things awkward, but I also didnât bring anything up when I saw Tech the next day. There was a party at the tech directorâs house that night, and during the show while none of us booth people had anything to do (Tech was run crew and therefore had no part in this conversation), the tech director jokingly said, âWeâre going to have to make sure Lilly and Tech behave themselves.â Thank god it was dark otherwise my face would have been bright red. âSheâs a party animal,â teased another booth person. âI have been to two parties my entire time at college so far (which was nearly two trimesters) and both of them have been cast partiesâ I defended myself. Thank god for cues getting me out of awkward situations.
Tech offered me a ride to the tech directorâs house. In hindsight he probably wanted to talk to me about the cast party. I was like âmeh?â and ended up going with the SM and her boyfriend who had offered me a ride earlier (it was fun. He has a âmafia carâ for anybody who cares and the SM apparently likes giving him shit for it).
Tech directorâs party nothing much happens. A group of about 7 of us play Cards Against Humanity and thereâs snacks and a CAT (I was hella excited about the cat and she was adorbs). I kinda had a plan to maybe flirt with Tech a little bit, but that ended up not happening because of the cat (thank you kitty). End of the night comes and Tech offers me a ride back. I know this is out of his way since he lives off campus and town is in the opposite direction from campus, but Iâm bad at making decisions so Iâm like âI donât really care?â I end up going with him. He parked hella far away not realizing that there was a lot of parking close to the house, so we walked along the alley and he jokes about a friend running him over, and Iâm like âIâm closer to the road so it would be me first.â
And then the cast party comes up. âSorry about last night by the way.â âItâs fine,â I said, maybe a little bit too quickly. I only had a crush on him, but making out kinda maybe hella amplified those feelings. âItâs something I tend to do when drunk.â Shit. âShould really stop doing that, especially since Iâm hoping to date Al.â Double shit. Initial readings were correct. Abort mission abort mission NOW. âYeah probably.â Iâm still trying to tease him, because I donât want to make things weird now when heâs about to bring me back to campus and heâs about my last chance now since I feel like everybody else already left. âSo, um, if you could not mention that to her that would be greatâŚâ Dude who do you think I am honestly. âI wonât. I mean I wasnât going to tell anybody anyways, but yeah.â Fuck Iâm rambling.
The car ride back was kinda awkward, but to his credit, Tech did keep up a little bit of conversation. I was mostly like fml man.
We get back to my dorm, and after a little bit of small talk about the hellish stairs as heâs pulling up, I get out and thank him for the ride, because I know itâs out of his way and Iâm polite to the point of aggression thank you very much. âSee you tomorrow kiddo.â Boom. So apparently Tech knows just what to say to shove a knife in my heart when Iâm trying to convince myself he was never mine to have. Fuck it, whateves. âSee ya!â Shuts door, runs across grass (very much *gasp!* at our school) and books it up stairs and into dorm.
Still have barely seen him, donât think Iâve talked to him since then (more because our tech jobs are pretty separate and I spent most of my down time having a very internal panic attack about a project for class, plus itâs only Sunday night (this happened Friday night for the making out and Saturday for the CAH party)). Gonna have to spend a good chunk of next Saturday with him because heâs in pep band with me and we have another show. Fuck it, maybe I can get him to take me out to food so we donât starve because pep will go until 4 or 5 and call time is 5:45
Anyways to wrap up this hour of rambling, Thanks for the nice night of making out Walt and helping me figure out maybe what I want from a relationship since my last one wasnât very good. And honestly, fuck you for telling me to stop caring about what the world thinks and then pulling that out on me.
I really fucking like you, but you were never mine to have
#he was never mine to have#i'll never post this#he asked me not to tell#but it feels good to get this off my chest#Fuck you Walt#I like you but I shouldn't#(ps from much later. i'm a liar about not posting it but eh blame my roommate asking and this being the only way i was gonna tell her lol)#writing#storytime with lilly#rant blog status: reinstated
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What Your Favorite Beer Says About You Because Itâs Apparently National Beer Day
Unless youve taken a three-year-long break from social media, you know that every fucking day is some kind of national holiday. Anything you can possibly think of has its own goddamn day. Siblings? Yup. But you cant forget only children because god knows theyd pitch a fucking fit, so theres a National Only Child Day too. National Margarita Day, National Iâm Obnoxious And Basic I Love My Poodle Day. You name it. So of course today is no different. Happy National Beer Day, everyone! And while Id prefer vodka soda or pinot noir day, Im def celebrating because at least it involves some form of alcohol. And since yall should celebrate too, heres what your fave type of beer says about you because Buzzfeed quizzes are over.
Local Craft Beer
If you only drink craft and local, lets be honest, youre annoying and pretentious about it. You say shit like hoppy on the reg and if someone tosses you a Bud Light at a party youre a dick and turn it down and make some snarky-ass comment about how you only drink âthe real stuffâ. Youre definitely a mega hipster and have a shit ton of bumper stickers on your car, probs of all your favorite breweries around town. You also voted for Bernie in the primaries and are still bringing up Hillaryâs emails every chance you getâCorrupt Clintonâ might as well be your Tinder bio at this point.
Michelob Ultra
Youre definitely a skinny betch if this is your go-to. You probs would rather have a vodka soda (wouldnt we all) but you occasionally want to come off as the cool girl who can hang with the guys, even if we all see right through it immediately. Ariana from is def a fan Michelob Ultra. You dont drink beer with the guys and have a body like that.
Guinness And Other Dark Shit
Guinness drinkers are blackout betches. You probs are just starting off the night and plan on working your way up to something way harder but instead of starting with a casual light beer, you dont waste any time and hit the ground running. Because of this commitment to the buzz, youre also a BSCB. You get in fights at the bar and your friends have bailed you out of jail at least twice. Be careful tonight.
Bud Light, Coors Light, Miller Light, etc.
Tbh, everyone drinks this shit so its hard to classify you as a specific type of betch. But Im just gonna focus on the people who designate it as their favorite. A lot like your beer choice, you are completely and totally average. Theres nothing terrible about you, but youre not memorable either. Youre the friend that the group forgot came out until they scrolled through drunken Instas, and if you had a nickname it would probably be âEgg Whites.âÂ
Seasonal Beer
The beer of the basics. Jambo! From grapefruit and lemon in the summertime to pumpkin in the fall, there is a beer for every fucking time of year and extras love them, because is it even a winter month if you dont have a peppermint beer to drink and/or post a pic of?
Mexican Beer
If you drink this, you have a Salt Life sticker on your Jeep and all your posts involve you on vacay in front of a body of water. Youre probs naturally hot (fucking bitch) and like shit like surfing. We get it, you went to Cabo one timeand no, despite how much you post about it, we are not going to âtake you back.â
European Beer
Betches who prefer only European beer studied abroad for one summer and never miss a chance to tell you about it. And ordering a European beer is the perfect segue to do that. After one sip, you start talking about how it reminds you of that month they spent on the Amalfi Coast and how it opened your eyes to a whole new world and bunch of other shit weve all heard a million times and DGAF about. Never mind the fact that everybody in Italy drinks wine so you kind of sound like an idiot.
Natty, Busch, etc.
First of all, what are you doing reading this? You probably need your parentsâ permission to be on this site right now seeing as you are most likely an actual child. Natty Light and its equivalents taste like actual piss water (not like we would know for sure), and if youre over the age of 15 and drink this you need to really reevaluate where your life is headed. Maybe take National Beer Day as an opportunity to broaden your horizons.
Sours
If you drink sours, youre a whole different level of hipster. Youre the hipster thats so committed to doing the cool new hip thing that you dont even care that what youre drinking is nasty af and tastes like straight vinegar. Tbh, I admire that level of dedication.
Cider
A cider is good and all, but its not a fucking beer. If this is your drink of choice on a day that honors BEER, youre phony afa lot like your beverage. You pretend to be one thing when really youre something totally different and trust me, we can all tell that youâre basically just apple juice with a slight kick.Â
Read more: http://betches.co/2oeViC5
from What Your Favorite Beer Says About You Because Itâs Apparently National Beer Day
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guess whoâs bk.... bk again..... shadyâs bk...... tell a friend... bradley struts onto the scene w a bleached blonde n shaven head wearin a white eminem vest. itâs she! more abt her under the cut u kno the drill
pinterest can b found here!!
MARGARET QUALLEY / CIS-FEMALE. â bradley milligan is really making a name for themselves as a tier 4 shepherd. i think that she is studying psychology in their junior year at lockwood, living in off campus. originally from queens, bradford pear is known to be brave & resilient, but can also be ruthless & destructive. â nai / 23 / gmt / she/her.
the kind of sour cherry only certain people have a taste for
once drank a bottle of whiskey, insisted she could still do a cartwheel and accidentally kicked an old manâs front tooth out in the process. proceeded 2 collapse into a flower bed and laugh so much abt it that she cried
barely takes anything seriously 50% of the time and is angry the other 50%
if she was a coffee sheâd be black with five grains of sugar that you couldnât taste until the last sip
father runs a gang n strip club in queens called âno angelsâ tht fronts an affluent drug trade, primarily coke. his name is tony milligan n his gang is p infamous around there fr being jst likeâŚ. completely cutthroat n awful. they were nicknamed âtonyâs rottweilersâ by locals bc he bsically has all of these trained dogs on leash at his command n theyâre still a growing organisation tday
heâs pretty much the worst human being alive n bradley hs likeâŚ.. a lot of issues with herself as a result of years of toxicity n abuse
in terms of more family bkground info her mumâs name was alyssa n she vanished when bradley was 12. jst likeâŚ. into thin air. nothing. no note. zilch. gan! n when bradley asked her dad abt it his response was essentially âguess she didnât love us enough to stayâ. as bradleyâs got older tho n become (without intention) more involved in the business side of things, itâs become pretty clear there was far more to the story. they had a horrible marriage n tony ws quite violent at the best of times, which didnât help the fact tht alyssa ws struggling a lot w severe depression n rly just⌠not in the mindset to b dealing w anything else on top of tht, even where motherhood ws concerned. bradley p much⌠would look after her a lot n theyâd both b scared of her dad n it was just a whole mess. anyway im rambling bt basically tony (bradleyâs dad) gt wind of alyssa sleeping w men tht worked fr him n he just⌠got rid. bradleyâs kind of worked out over the yrs tht her mum didnât jst leave on her own accord n tht something must hav happened to her bt sheâs too scared of her dad to ever directly accuse him
when her mum went all of her dadâs cruelty pretty mch got channelled straight onto her. it ws diluted between two before bt as u can probably imagine her upbringing was jstâŚ. a steep downhill decline frm tht point onwards
she learnt ways 2 deal w the incurring trauma bt they werenât healthy ones at all! bsically jst. will do or take anything fr the distraction. chases a thrill like itâs the only way to remind her sheâs alive. has absolutely no regard fr her own wellbeing n sometimes gets other ppl in trouble too bc sheâs so insatiably reckless
high functioning alcoholic. if u ever see her w a coffee cup u jst kno tht one sniff will confirm high alcohol percentage. honestly idk hw she does it her liver must b yellin
she hdâŚ.2 separate stints of psychiatric hospitalisation n she never tlks abt it. like ever. acknowledging sheâs been vulnerable is her worst nightmare n bc of the way her dad raised her she always thinks any sign of struggling within herself is weakness. truly doesâŚ. not kno how to properly emotion
honestly. im probably missing a million things bc i kind of feel like a microwaved shrimp as i write this bt. basically her life is jst the worst a true⌠abomination! bc im evil like tht sometimes
loyal to a point of fault. if she cares abt u and u murder a man in cold blood sheâll brawl anyone that says ur guilty
honestly wld probably fight a person over anything. sometimes sheâll jst be having a bad day n sheâll burst n take it out on whoever says the wrong thing. a minefield!
has the worst luck in romanceâŚ. ever. the majority of her past bfs hav been absolute beasts n as a result she kind of has the âromance is dead n love is a lieâ mentality
speakin of which i feel like sheâs bi bt wldnt have dated a girl or anythin. like guys r probablyâŚ. her preference just bc historically theyv treated her worse n she hs a very self destructive personality like that. sexy!
dresses like courtney love, 2014 sky ferreira and a character from this is england had a baby. mostly wears stolen clothes from strangers and jackets that swamp her. hair is p much always a wild mess n she usually hd kind of smudgy/smoky makeup bcos apparently sheâs allergic to combs and generally looking presentable⌠relatable content
personality wise sheâs v sarcastic. sometimes blunt. kind of has a habit ofâŚ. assessing a person n sheâs quite perceptive bc sheâs been trained to b by the way she always has to monitor her dadâs expression fr the slightest emotion change. sheâs quite confident n can p much mke a conversation out of whatever. sort of independent too like she hs a bunch of friends bt she doesnât care abt going out places alone if sheâs in a certain mood n jst wantsâŚâŚ to get into chaos. sheâs probably kind of known around campus/town bt itd b a 50/50 balance between bein known as intimidating n bein known as that one girl tht always gets into anarchy
where the app is concerned!! iv made her a tier 4 shepherd bc i feel like she deals fr her dads gang thru the app n like. they probably have something incriminating held over her head about pearl winters (shoutout 2 pand love u icon) whoâs her best friend n she wldnt want her to go to jail or anything so. i havenât rly decided fully what it might be?? mayb...... this hit and run they were involved in bt. bradley ws in the passenger side n pearl ws in the bk n this guy sawyer ws driving n they told him to stop bt he jst like. purposefully ran this man jason dwn. it ws super traumatic obviously n bradley feels responsible even tho she cldnt rly do anything abt it so. ya sheâs prob bein blackmailed w something to do w tht perhaps
likes: fishnets, stealing cars, throwing watermelons off rooftops and whiskey
dislikes: amy schumer, honesty, yellow tulips and going home
in terms of Plots
hm. mayb someone tht knows her frm home/queens??? like tht frequents no angels (her dadâs strip club) or picks up frm there or smthn
she deals coke thru the app n probably other drugs too like pills n whtever..... bt feel like coke is her main sell. she doesnât even need the money she jst does it bc itâs like.......... the culture sheâs been raised into n also she finds the risk of it all entertaining so. mayb she deals to someone
anyoneâŚ.. shes brawled in the past like. sheâs literally a menace i cnt express this enough. wil jst randomly throw a drink in someoneâs face fr no reason bc sheâs bored. sheâs probably pissed off 1000 diff ppl in 1000 diff ways. the possibilities r endless n i jst think thtâs a sexy prospect!
fwbs perhaps??? exes??? (probably ws a tumultuous relationship wteverâŚ. ur muse is like like bradley is. a handful)
mayb someone tht she met at an aa meeting when she hd to go fr a court mandated thing one time after bein arrested fr public indecency. i feel like thereâs probably a rly expensive statue somewhere thts fancily Sculpted n she like. did a flying kick n kicked the dick of it off n gt arrested fr it
ppl sheâŚâŚ. Goes Wild Goes Crazy w. truly jst the most self destructive person alive so anyone w a similar mindset wld b a hellish bt fun combination
on the contrary a gd influence cld b nice perhaps? like someone tht genuinely cares abt her n she jst doesnât kno hw to compute it
um. honestly the worldâs our oyster. hmu n we cn brainstorm if none of tht catches ur eye!
#wshintro#depression tw#hospitalisation tw#abuse tw#alcoholism tw#drugs tw#addiction tw#disappearance tw#murder tw#death tw#grief tw#self harm tw#alcohol tw#god thts a hefty amt of tws to say the least bt. wht can i say. bradleys life is abysmal#hit and run tw
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