#also me: ...well in the right circumstances and situation with the right manner and dosage...

[viperwhispered]

Okay but... Why is it so hot to think of Jamil calling himself your slut 🙈😳

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[ironandmagic]

The Eagle

I spend most of my time in psychiatric hospitals. I talk with wanderers, rock stars, mathematicians, drunks, victims of extraterrestrial plots, and people who at first, and often even at second glance, seem quite all right in every way. The top psychiatrists in the city have met with me more often than they'd like, and many patients know me on a first name basis. Just the other day I met a man who was convinced that he was, in some ways, an eagle. He asked if I'd like to hear his cry. Sure, why not? So he jumped up on his bed, spread his arms, tilted back his head, and let loose. It was loud. I mean really loud. The crackling shriek was so real it sent shivers up my spine. (He thinks he's an eagle – what if he thinks I'm a rodent?) But then he stopped, smiled, and asked how I thought he had done. Apparently he made these same noises in the local park a few days ago and picnicking families didn't appreciate the performance. The police were called, and they decided within 30 seconds that he should be taken to the hospital.I told him I had never heard anything so life-like in my life. He seemed pleased.

More people than you think are hospitalized in this manner. A person is brought in and, after being questioned by a physician, is told that he will be held in hospital as an involuntary patient. He no longer has the right to leave. He is "certifiable." If he considers himself an eagle, he can consider himself caged.

What would you do in this situation? Angry, confused, and scared, you might yell out something like, "I'll kill you if you lock me up in here!" The attending physician will use this as evidence of homicidal ideation should you retain a lawyer to challenge your detention. Which is why I'm in hospital. I'm the lawyer.

With So, you end up being held and treated against your will – because your will has been called into question. What are the odds of getting out? Well, on paper, here in the city of Toronto, about 10 percent of challenges to involuntary status succeed. Much of the time, my role isn't so much to win as it is to ensure you are treated with respect.

On admission, it is often strongly suggested that you take some benzodiazepines: medication the staff tells you will help you relax.

Whether you think this is a good idea or not is beside the point – you'll be getting pro re nata medication (Latin for "according to circumstances") until you calm down. The drugs make you feel drowsy and dizzy. More medication is offered later in the day. By now, you're likely to accept it.

Two days later, you might no longer wish to receive any medication at all. You're asleep all the time and you want to get back home so you can tackle that mathematical equation that you've been working on for years. Or perhaps your best friend is performing in a play tomorrow evening. Or you're simply fed up with being denied the right to enjoy a beautiful day. Physicians sometimes mistake your refusal to take medication as an indication of incapacity.

And so the eagle is handed a piece of paper indicating that the physician has found him incapable of consenting to treatment. The doctor is trying to contact his mother, to whom he has not spoken in years. She has never appreciated his love of nature, his obsession with birds of prey. She's tired of dealing with his illness. That afternoon, she consents, on his behalf, to a long-acting injection of halperidol – a typical antipsychotic medication. Side-effects are not discussed, though they may turn out to be pronounced. But not to worry, the physician has a variety of medications to deal with any problems.

Some clients ask to see their naturopath. Others ask for the marijuana that they use to keep the anxiety or the voices at bay. Many physicians will see such people as holistic quacks or drug addicts, and will check for "street drugs" in their urine each time they return from a pass to the outside world. The same doctors will not hesitate to order increased dosages of benzodiazepines and antipychotics. Sometimes my clients are so medicated that I am unable to communicate with them. Sometimes all they can do is grab my arm, pull me close, and whisper, "Get me out of here." Of course, many patients choose not to challenge their detention. Many others find themselves in those hospitals that do not make the necessary effort to help a person understand their rights. I've helped some clients get out of hospital on "technicalities" – physicians can't stand that. A technicality, though, is usually something so fundamental to the process of involuntary detention that its bypass is an affront to human dignity.

After a brief stay in hospital, the eagle is considered manageable. Despite the involuntary muscle spasms, restlessness, shakiness, drowsiness, slower gait, blurred vision, and sexual dysfunction, and the fact that he can no longer express himself as an eagle, his treatment is considered a success and he is ready to return to the community. But not as a free person.

In the province that I live in, Ontario, the government has passed a bill that expanded the criteria for involuntary detention, but also introduced the "community treatment order." The order is a legal mechanism that allows a person to live free in the community only as long as they agree to take prescribed medication. Failure to do so can result in involuntary detention. What if a person wants to refuse the drugs? On paper, a legal challenge has a two to three percent chance of success.

But let's be clear. Medication and involuntary hospitalization have helped many people in the mental health system regain control of their lives. But for others, the loss of the fundamental civil rights that we often take for granted is a lingering shock and assault. They have no choice but to refer to themselves as psychiatric survivors. Mental health laws worldwide use the justification of people's "best interests" to deprive law-abiding citizens of their rights and freedoms, but as the court declared in one landmark case, "History has shown that the road to injustice is frequently lit with the light of good intention."

Outside the hospital, my clients face troubles far more challenging than the ones inside their heads. There is stigma, of course, often compounded by the crippling effects of poverty. There is the growing sense that the public needs protection from people with mental health problems. There are economic policies that brush aside the people who struggle hardest in day-to-day life. There is environmental degradation, the postmodern religion of unsustainable growth, consumption, and production. Do you suppose the mentally ill fail to recognize these problems?

The eagle leans close to my ear. "Crazy is working 70 hours a week at a job you can't stand," he says.

[purkinje-effect]

The Anatomy of Melancholy, 23

Table of Contents. Go to previous. Go to next.

TW: drug use, insect imagery

‘Choly’s... finally getting to where he’s had enough.

Melancholy popped a Mentat under his tongue and squared up to the hubeine task once again. He rubbed his hands together. When he couldn’t locate any mercaptan agent on hand, he collected from the shelves hydrochloric acid, acetone, phosphorus, and pyridine. A breath finally came to him once the bottles were all set out in front of him on the lab equipment counter, and he chewed up what remained of the Mentat. He barely remembered to turn on the hood fan and put on gloves before getting started.

Staring at the bottles, ‘Choly sighed and slouched in his chair. I don’t know, cook some in the back yard before you leave. The creeping tightness in his back flesh wrapped into his rib muscles and tickled at his already unsteady breathing. He shook his head in an attempt to dislodge the lucid nightmare, and backed up from the lab counter to let himself breathe mindfully. Unlike the Abraxo Powder, he couldn’t afford to drop most of these--and it had next to nothing to do with the scarcity of the stuff. The extraction of the alkaloids from the hubflower remained a relatively safe process, provided he kept on top of maintaining water levels as it steeped, but changing the chemical properties of one specific alkaloid from that process posited all manner of dangers. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his skills or knowledge, despite how far estranged from the act he’d become, both in time and cause. He distrusted his constitution, his faculties, his dexterity. If he spilled the hydrochloric acid, it had the capacity to exact him real harm. There would be no easy way to go about this. Or was there?

The trip downstairs to the break room got him contemplating Angel’s proselytizing self-patience. He didn’t have to pull up the addictions tab of the health screen of his Pip-Boy to remember what it listed. Even if a shell-shocked state hadn’t brought about his flightiness and dissociation, he might still benefit from the same treatment for such a circumstance. Perhaps he could owe the free-flowing psychedelic drug to his smooth operation the past few months. After all, since the Jet rig had pulled its first batch, he could count on one hand his episodes since.

The outfit hadn’t since found more ampuoles to fill and reuse since the project went live, and he used Jet far less than anyone else in the outfit, so he didn’t keep many doses of Jet to himself. Just like anyone else in Lexington, his having more than a few at a time would hinder others’ access to the chem. Still, it couldn’t hurt to try to trial a low-dose regimen. Especially if--he collected the clean silver tablespoon from the utensil drawer--he kept to realizing small, granular steps, to minimize missteps along the way. He fetched an ampuole from Angel, confirming he had three, and returned upstairs.

He took a half-hit off the inhaler, and set the spoon and also a box of syringes with the components already on the counter while he waited for the hallucinogen to take. With the spoon a third filled with hubeine salts, he used a scoopula to add in an equal amount of the phosphorus, then droppered in the paint thinner and hydrochloric acid in an exact ratio. He held it over a bunsen burner until the mixture turned a waxy yellow-grey. His senses cross-wired in the vapors, and as he slowly added the clear pyridine, he relished the satisfying crisp palate of achieving the specific requisite vibrant clarity. He poured off the clear solution that had separated to the top of the spoon, into a waste bowl, then drew the chem into the syringe, collared the needle, and capped it. Finally, he flipped it over and primed the pneumatic mechanism. It took no time at all this way, and he could guarantee precision like this. Even moreso, the process seemed to go even more smoothly than with cyclomorphine. He made four more in this way, whistling to himself to the lugubrious, comfortable tune the sequence of the chemicals’ colors played in his mind.

The moment of ease sublimated. An oversight, he had spent all his attention on synthesizing the agent, without considering how to include the constituent parts that made a dose bearable, and had sealed off the syringes. There was only one part to this injection he’d concocted. No saline to ease it into the tissue, no Stimpak to ease tissue necrosis. In a twinge of whimsy, he weighed whether pure cyclohubeine fit the definition of Jared’s invoice. Technically speaking, he’d derived this substance from hubeine and not morphine, so already he couldn’t in full conscience call what he’d made Psycho, even if hypothetically he fit it with all its triumvirate syringes. Was it the truly moral thing to do, in his position, to complement the dosage with supplementary substances which softened the damage if they didn’t prevent the damage altogether? Slow rot or fast rot, a Psycho addiction was lethal all the same, and without the accessory doses, he could manufacture the chem far more readily and with far fewer resources.

Up until that moment, the larvae had left him to work in solitude, but he found a speckling of them trying to appreciate the luxury of his lap as though minute pets. With a knit brow, he smiled down at them in wistful defeat. In their tiny non-verbal way, their wriggling reminded him of the Merrick Index pages Berries-and-Jet Carey had proposed to supplement, of the nihilistic stillness of the ‘Fly-Blown’ story, and of how his alleged Bloatfly Syringes used straight cyclomorphine absent of any Stimpak. He thought back to the day before, when he’d dismissed Angel’s threatening Jared’s life with what amounted to not if I get to him first. Again, the morality of the situation pulled at him, and he wondered how humane it was to continue letting Jared run this deranged metaphysical experiment, no matter the fibre of the unaware people he wrangled into his trials.

But how different was what Jared was doing, to what ‘Choly had done at Deenwood? He was just as tired of not standing up to Jared as he was of remembering that he hadn’t stood up to Hawthorne. History didn’t have to repeat itself here, he told himself. Flipping in the Merrick Index to the added pages he’d tucked in its back cover, the chemist deliberated the logistics of what would be the most humane way to administer this potent alkaloid to Jared’s raiders. As he wondered how many Berserk Syringes it would take to turn the whole outfit in on itself, the memory of Hawthorne’s misshapen, jawless, rotting face clawed at his rationality. He took the other half of the ampuole in the hopes of chasing it away, the vapors escaping his nose with a strong dismissive exhale. The lichinka had not misguided him before. He simply hadn’t listened to them as attentively as was healthy or right of him.

“No. No, I’ll behave. For one day longer, at least.” With a phlegmy agitation, he told the larvae his intentions. “The test batch must be as advertised. To prove it works as expected. Compare cyclohubeine to cyclomorphine. Maybe doing tandem darts would suffice. It won’t be a waste to break down a Stimpak for this. First, the Psycho. Then immediately chasing it with a Stimpak. With the Calmex, I’m a good enough shot to get both injection sites in about the same proximity to one another. The next batch, I will do this.”

Discontent with his backpedaling, the lichinka crawled up his pants legs to go wherever they pleased. He let out a pathetic whine as he started at dismantling the plunger head of a Stimpak, and tried to still himself all the while. Yet somehow, their gentle and diligent nettling made the task nearly pleasant, and he found himself smiling to himself as he lapsed again into daydreaming about the viability of making a Bloatfly Syringe for self-administration.

The enormity of a fully prepped batch of fresh-made Psycho sobered him almost instantly once he had two Syringer cases loaded for two sets of five doses each. Two hundred years after the war, and he was still making this poison. He nearly threw them as hard as possible at the ground, and snarled in a halted motion, instead setting them on the counter in front of him and backing off once more, narrowly preventing himself from wasting hours of hard work. All moral contention resumed once the Jet no longer gripped him, and he sniveled.

“My word, Mister Carey, what has you so animated!” Angel came up to inspect both its owner’s disposition and activities. When ‘Choly jumped and froze at the interruption, the Mister Handy’s ocular lenses scrutinized the various bottles still sitting out from the project. It couldn’t meet eye contact, lingering in a hard pause. “...What’s brought all this on again, then?”

“It’s not what it looks like,” was the best he could muster, lousy and frowning in uncertain terror.

“Well it certainly can’t look like too many things, no matter how small the quantities are you’ve crafted here. I’m not dull, Sir. Need I remind you, that in all your time working for Major Johnston, and even for Miss Gretchen, I assisted you in synthesizing many things, and I could never forget the constituents you have at the ready here. It wounds me, to think you needed to lie to me about this. But even more, I’m disappointed there’s a circumstance you’ve felt it necessary to resort to making more of the horrible stuff.” It stopped pacing, but still did not make eye contact. “Please swear to me in total confidence you don’t intend it for self-administration, at the very least. At least tell me you’re simply trying to find more beneficial purposes for cyclomorphine. That this isn’t going to be a repeat of the circumstances all those years ago that injured you so.”

“It’s cyclohubeine, if it assuages your nerves, or whatever you have.” Shakily, he steadied himself in the wheelchair, and whet his lips. He couldn’t keep his voice from cracking. “It’s not for me. I swear it. Hhhi could never. Jared thinks-- thinks it’s going to help. That there’s a medical benefit to this stuff. And he won’t listen to me, that I know otherwise from personal, extensive patient testing. But he doesn’t want to use it in any of the ways we tested at Deenwood. ...Bozhemoy, Angel. I don’t know how much, but he knows about Deenwood. He--”

“Slow down, Sir.” Angel regretted its disappointment in him, and it returned to his side, to offer him a canister of condensated water, which he accepted and opened to sip with weak gratitude. “He... does now? How did he come upon it?”

“He has some prewar history book.” The nausea of withdrawal mixed with dread needled his heart. As he spoke, he brightened, understanding Angel wanted him to act as informant to uncover the origin of a confidentiality breach. “He dug it out to show me because he recognized my uniform, I suppose. There’s a picture of me in it. It only contains the most rudimentary civilian-level information, but he... he knows about MK Excel. Not even I know all that much about it. It was still in testing phases when the Anchorage treaty resolved the conflict. I haven’t said a word about anything of the sort. Done everything I could to dissuade him, even as far as promising to craft him anything but.”

“No need to feel threatened by me. This doesn’t warrant reporting anything to the Defense Intelligence Agency. I was woefully mistaken, to believe for a second you’d ever relinquish your highly classified skill set.” Its abrupt entendred tone suggested it understood full well the stakes in play, and the reason for its owner’s behavior. “We can handle this point of conflict ourselves. You’re a varied and talented chemist, Captain Carey. If Mister Jared believes you are Lexington’s savior, so be it. Provided you’re up for it, Sir.”

‘Choly nipped at the skin of his lip with an anxious smile, and he wondered if he were still hallucinating as his morality, camaraderie, and spirit converged in agreement of what had to be done.

“Truest blue, moy angel.”

“And you as well! Is the uncertainty with Mister Jared all that’s got you upset?”

“I... I need to test this batch,” he finally said. Provided you’re up for it. The proximity to his military contract abraded him. Recollection twinged at him, that what turned his stomach so badly during his active duty, more than any other aspect of the Deenwood Project, was administering the chem--and that what had for years settled his stomach and nerves had been his heavy reliance on the Melancholia. “I need volunteers. I refuse to force anyone this time.”

“I suspect you know exactly where you’d like to start,” it vaguely encouraged.

Tired but emotionally reconstituted, he nodded, then nodded more certainly.

By the time the two headed out of the pharmacy, the sun had set. Having scaled the building with the overturned freighter atop it, ‘Choly dismounted from Angel to approach Jerry, who had just started her evening shift on the catwalk overlooking the Battle Green. He swallowed, stared down by the woman in power armor. He’d never noticed before, but she wielded a Fatman as her weapon of choice--a portable launcher rigged specifically to shoot miniature nuclear artillery shells. He wondered a tic whether her lack of patience ever caused her to waste what had to be among the scarcest ammunition in the post-apocalypse, but decided even moreso that the requisite of picking whom she blew up and whom she didn’t must have emotionally compromised her.

“What do you want, Chemist?” the blonde nagged. “I’m busy.”

“I know it’s a bad subject, but when I was up here the first time we met, I couldn’t help but notice you had a personal chem stash. You... wouldn’t happen to ever have Psycho in it, w-- ould you?”

“Oh, shit, it’s my fav,” she replied without skipping a beat.

“--Ah.” He sniffed, adjusting his glasses. “Good. My hunch was right. I need you to do something for me, then.”

Jerry squinted at him, and checked something at ground level from her vantage before resuming eye contact.

He continued, “I need you to gather up everybody in the outfit that you know also uses Psycho. I’m doing a free rooftop sample tomorrow. Experienced Psycho users only. I need to test my first batch before I start doing large batches.”

All he had to do was mention ‘free’ and ‘Psycho’ in the same breath to have her bent over backwards, and then he went and tacked on the insinuation Psycho would soon flow as freely as the Jet. Her eyes went wide and her jaw dropped despite her lips pursed tight in surprise.

“Fuck me, sometimes Jared proves why he’s the leader,” she blurted out, jerking animate to giddily pace to one end of the catwalk and back. “You’ve got it. The usual time?”

“The usual time,” he nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

“Good fuckin’ night, you beautiful weirdo. I could kiss you if I wasn’t so fond of the twilight hours.”

“Save it for somebody special,” he laugh-cried as he remounted Angel.

“Sir, I can’t help but notice you don’t seem yourself,” Angel commented at a hush as they descended the stairs. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Everything had gone so much more smoothly when he nursed his withdrawals instead of fought them. First, the Mentats, and after today, the Jet as well.

“While we’re out, I want to scout the Jet rig, to pull a batch for myself. Jared said he’s going to stop working with it, once the... other project gets in full swing, so I don’t feel quite so bad running off with a few extra ampuoles for myself.” He held his Syringer to his chest and gripped the rein in one hand to stroke the Handy’s sky blue chrome shell appreciatingly. “Jet’s helped me so tremendously, Angel. I can’t even begin to describe how much good it’s done me. The documentation was so limited for it before owing to how new it was before the world ended, but I have every proof just how much of a medical miracle it can be. I’ve finally started putting my hands on chems that fix what’s wrong with me.”

“It’s a bit late to be going to work, but let’s see what we can do for you.”

As to be expected, Jared still had surveillance out on him, and two raiders cut them off at the side entrance to the Corvega Assembly Plant. At gunpoint, he returned the favor, and squinted through the spotlight which he found directed squarely on him.

“What do you need, Chemist? Isn’t it a bit late to be bothering the boss? He told us you should be at home working on that little project of yours, not gallivantin’ around town an’ chattin’ people up.”

“I, I just came for--” His bleary eyes sifted the area for something to smokescreen why he’d come, and he laughed it off when they wouldn’t stand down. A bucket, and several dozen sacks of brahmin manure, piled up at ready access. “I came for-- for some fertilizer for my hubs! Yeah, I just need a bucket full or so. Manure is great for gardening. Hahahahh.”

The second raider snorted in displeased dismissal, and rolled his eyes at him.

“Sure thing. Just be quick about it.”

‘Choly got down and collected the stuff himself from one of the recently-abandoned sacks, and his stomach greatly disliked recalling what filling a five-gallon bucket with manure felt like after everything that had transpired, but he powered through it with his eyes shut for most of the task. He handed off the prize to Angel, who held it in a pincer at a full limb’s length away from itself, and remounted.

“Thank you!” he shot off waving to them, not suspiciously at all, as they left.

“Go! Home!” they both yelled at him.

“Well that could have gone better,” Angel began, put off.

“...I think they might have thought I was casing the assembly plant,” ‘Choly worried. “Or that they might be getting wise to my dissatisfaction of my job position.”

“Then we’ll just have to win them over in spades tomorrow! Come along, then! I have dinner to get into you before you get some rest. Might I jettison this horrid mess yet, Sir?”

“I. No. No, I said it to smokescreen myself, but it’s not a half bad idea. I’ve done my share of working toward taking better care of myself. I should pamper my garden, too. And you. You’re too good to me.”

“So be it, but I insist you take it right upstairs. I don’t have to be able to smell it to know it’s absolutely teeming with nastiness.”

“Tochno.”

“--In English, Mister Carey!” it ejaculated at a whisper.

“Without hesitation.”

Go to Next »»»

[alvaradoaudrey1993]

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Granddaddy crimson, aka Grand Daddy Purp or GDP, is a hybrid that become first propagated in Northern California in 2003 via breeder Ken Estes. A cross between purple Urkle and big Bud, GDP was then backcrossed into itself. to be had in clone shape from Northern California’s dark coronary heart Nursery, the stress produces short, compact plants with tight internodal spacing. all through its flowering cycle, leaves have a tendency to display excessive shades of crimson, blue, inexperienced and orange. Granddaddy purple can be cultivated interior or out, however grows nice in a climate-managed surroundings. at the same time as the flowering cycle takes roughly 65 days to finish whilst cultivated indoors, out of doors growers can anticipate to harvest through late September or early October within the Northern Hemisphere, and late March to early April in the Southern Hemisphere. A genetic winner, GDP’s buds gained first area in 2015 on the Denver high times hashish Cup for excellent U.S. Indica. Granddaddy pink has a mean THC content of approximately 17 percentage, and is typically excessive in Caryophyllene, alpha-Pinene, and Humulene.

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classification: Sativa parents: Panamanian landrace developing environment: Indoor/outdoor garden abilities: novice Flowering Time: 11–12 weeks Yield: moderate THC content: Low clinical makes use of: depression, anxiety, irritation, nausea Breeder: Reeferman Seeds

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The taste of the Martian suggest green and the yields of the Shrom makes this cross the ideal blend of mythical traces. Buds or Hash you cant free with this strain. 1st Legends of Hash Dinner 2011 1st Legends of Hash Dinner 2010 3rd outdoor Highlife Cup 2009

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Hybrid lines include a mix of sativa and indica genetics and, depending on their lineage, can take on traits from both strain households.

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it is able to act as both a earlier than-mattress and mid-day weed. however, novice people who smoke need to be conscious. headaches and dizziness are a commonplace side impact. Strawberry Diesel will hit you want a baseball and it will hit you rapid. you might need to take a seat down for this hit of weed. otherwise, you might become falling down and can even severely harm your self.

Strawberry Diesel is a good combination of Sativa and Indica. those seeds are ideal for growing interior. They also can be grown exterior but best if the weather is moderate. They don’t do properly with warm climates. Flowering takes about 9 to 10 weeks and within the late few days, the fruity odor of strawberry and the powerful aroma of diesel will be extra outstanding than ever, making it ideal for just everybody accessible.

Strawberry Snow Cone is a heavy yielding sativa as a way to make a room smell like sour strawberries. The scent is loud and the taste is unbelievably delicious and in contrast to something i’ve encountered in every other plant.

when i used to be operating with our IBL bitter Diesel line, i discovered an superb male. a pal who was also a breeder had a quite coveted and protected Strawberry Cough that he didn’t supply out to every person. His SC produced 2-liter bottle sized powerfully fragrant colas. We found this awesome plant from that go.

The bitter Diesel male delivered bitter but did not add any diesel. For this cross, that changed into precisely what i used to be searching out. The bitter compliments the strawberry flawlessly.

when handling the plant, even touching the stems and leaves will depart your palms lined with sticky, strawberry smelling resin. For human beings that think flavor is essential to them, this is a pressure that may be a ought to try.

The bitter Diesel stress, sometimes called sour D, is an invigorating sativa-dominant strain named after its smelly, diesel-like aroma. This rapid-performing strain can provide energizing, dreamy cerebral outcomes which have pushed sour Diesel to its mythical reputation. stress, ache, and depression fade away in lengthy-lasting relief that makes bitter Diesel a pinnacle desire amongst scientific patients. This pressure took root inside the early 90’s, and it is believed to have descended from Chemdawg ninety one and super Skunk.

sour Diesel has round, medium-sized buds with leaves that appear yellowish-inexperienced. pink hairs called pistils, systems that perform to seize pollen from male vegetation, contrast with the densely-packed leaves. while well cured, the vegetation are rather sticky — the dusting of trichomes isn’t as without delay obvious as it is on more resinous traces like White Widow. however, breaking open buds reveals trichomes coating the insides of the dense flora. The buds have an overpowering odor that, true to this stress’s call, is very much like gas.

Where to buy Strawberry Diesel Strain Online

The odor additionally has a few suggestions of orange. Breaking open or grinding the buds intensifies this fragrance, and adds additives of musk and pine sap. bitter Diesel has a notoriously harsh, acrid smoke that can reason customers to cough or make their sinuses water. The smoke has a bitter and vaguely skunky taste that may describe as unpleasant; on the exhale, the diesel and almost ammonia-like tang stings the palate and might linger for a long time afterward. people who smoke looking to stay discreet should be warned that this is a totally pungent pressure whose odor can carry for quite a distance.

[thewolfofwallstreetposts-blog]

Character & Humour

The Wolf of Wall Street can be viewed as a novel worthy of being a bestseller due to the characterisation present within its writing. The format of the writings as a memoir is beneficial, as it allows for the reader to truly get a sense of who Jordan Belfort was and now is. The fact that, as a memoir, it was written by him, truly gathers a clear picture of his personality and perspective on the situations at play.

The Jordan Belfort that is presented to the reader through the recollections of past events is definitively an immoral character. To begin, he holds zero respect for others and acts as if the world and everyone in it owes him his desires. This is most prominently shown through Jordan’s treatment of his wife, Nadine, as he spends countless paragraphs commenting on her physical appearance in a crude manner and expecting sexual favors from her. His descriptions are vulgar and uncomfortable, often making Nadine sound like a piece of meat he is eager to devour. Despite this he proclaims that he loves his wife… and then continues to cheat on her with prostitutes throughout their marriage. This represents how his needs come before his commitments and the obvious way in which he holds himself higher than those around him. From a characteristic standpoint, Jordan Belfort is cocky, selfish and vile, focussed on superficial wants and vanity. This is best represented in the novel through his constant mention of the costs of his possessions and expenses, such as, “... taupe $12,000 Edward Fields carpet…” (Belfort 24) and “... nothing that couldn’t be fixed with $10,000 and a sharp scalpel…” (Belfort 25). This reminder throughout the novel goes to show that Jordan Belfort holds a superiority complex through his money and as such explains his tendency to parade his mass amounts of wealth around.

However, despite these deeply negative characteristics that are established, Jordan Belfort is far from a one dimensional characterisation of the American elite. In his childhood, he was fairly poor and often picked on by other well-off children for his class and Jewish heritage. As a result, his constant flaunting of wealth and materialistic tendencies stem from his past. These behaviours are his assertion of superiority, as he has been taught from a young age that the richer you are, the better you are. This causes the character to also be plagued with a personality trait of self doubt and gives reasoning to his cocky and troubled behaviour. He is determined to prove himself to those around him by flaunting his wealth and status in every way, thus resulting in the persona of the ‘Wolf of Wall Street’. This mentality of a need to behave inappropriately to assert his status is best exemplified through the quote, “I felt like I was being driven to do things, not because I really wanted to do them but because they were expected of me. It was as if my life was a stage, and the Wolf of Wall Street was performing for some imaginary audience, who judged my every move and hung on my every word” (Belfort 130). The character thus feels pressured to do immoral deeds in his life as it is is expected of him, as a rich and powerful man, and as such his actions are produced by his inner weakness and doubt. 

 Belfort is given further depth as he is also displayed as an addict, both to substance and power. He writes, “Under those circumstances, I would have to say that the appropriate dosage of methaqualone should be small, perhaps 250 milligrams, or one Lude, taken now, thirty minutes before lunch, which would give me just the right buzz to enjoy my pasta while allowing me to escape detection at the hands of the Cobbler, who’d been sober for almost five years. A killjoy. Then I would snort a few lines of coke just before I got behind the helicopter’s controls…” (Belfort 328). This represents the weaker side of the character, as he is dependant on substances to live his life to an extreme degree, as is exemplified through his multitude of attempts to get sober throughout the novel, only to fall back off the wagon within the week. Time and time again he gives into temptation as is further asserted through his lust for power. He feeds off the satisfaction of being in charge and well respected among his employees. He could leave the immoral and taxing he leads behind, as he promises and attempts to do throughout the novel,  but he ultimately fails due to his addictions. This is shown when Nadine states, “You’re addicted to all the power - and to all those idiots who call you the King and the Wolf!” (Belfort 214). Through the inclusion of these character defects and  life issues, Jordan Belfort is made a more relatable character despite his large wealth and status. This makes it easier for the reader to relate to him as a person as they can see themselves through any shared problems and behaviours. Thus, the novel is amplified through its character, as it is not a story being told from an incomprehensible place, but one of personal struggle and merit that anyone can relate to, when boiled down to its most basic forms of feeling inadequate and being subject to temptation. Through these inner conflicts, the reader begins to form an understanding of Belfort’s mentality and actions. While they may not condone his behaviour, they will understand it and, along with their formed pity, they can begin to hope for him to turn his life around and become a better man.

Lastly, the characters voice does a great deal to benefit the novel. Throughout his narration of his life’s story, Jordan Belfort often explains the outlandish and often immoral or disgusting situations he finds himself in with a humorous edge. For example, Belfort writes, “It was sad, I thought, that a guy as sharp as Elliot would throw his life away to drugs… That was the problem with someone like Elliot, who refused to accept the fact that drugs had gotten the best of them” (Belfort 328). This is humorous through its irony, as Belfort comments on the wasted potential of one of his friends due to drugs and their inability to accept it, while conveniently disregarding his own issues with substance abuse. It is passages like this that best showcase the humorous tone of the novel, thus making it an easy read as the story is typically told on a lighter note. This method of storytelling is also refreshing, as it deals with an immoral and typically dramatic subject matter with humour.

Therefore, the main character of the novel really goes a long way in asserting why The Wolf of Wall Street is a bestseller. Since the story revolves around Belfort, it is also fairly dependant on him to be successful. As such, his relatability through flaws, coupled with his fast paced, humourous style makes the novel both  grounded for the reader while also remaining immensely entertaining.

[epchapman89]

The Dark Truth About Goth Lattes

A few short weeks ago we reported on the emergence of a new beverage trend: the Goth Latte, a latte made using activated charcoal. The results are visually stunning, but it turns out enjoying these drinks—or any of today’s multitude of ice creams and lemonades spiked with charcoal—could pose serious health risks for those on certain kinds of medications.

They were whipping up all manner of activated charcoal drinks out in Venice Beach at Menotti’s Coffee Stop, one of LA’s best cafes, when I visited a few weeks ago. Founder Christopher “Nicely” Abel Alameda is not shy about his enthusiasm for activated charcoal beverages, and his shop’s signature drink menu features riffs like the “Darth Mocha,” featuring Valrhona chocolate, Maldon salt, and activated charcoal, and the “Charcoalate Milk,” made with charcoal (natch), hemp milk, and house ganache.

The drinks are delicious and striking, drawing oohs and ahhs from the perpetual motion machine of customers coursing in and out of the tiny cafe, just a block from the Venice Beach boardwalk. “What is that?” a patron asks. “That’s a #2 Pencil,” Nicely replies. Folks start ordering the drinks in place of their usual iced lattes, and before we know it there’s a crowd gathered as the next drink lands on the bar.

Each activated charcoal drink at Menotti’s contains just a gram of activated charcoal, and that dosage is typical across other foodstuff applications of AC—like, say, the Charcoal Lemonade you might find for sale a few blocks away on Abbot Kinney. Nicely’s use of charcoal on the menu is about more than visual appeal and fad chasing—he’s used the ingredient in his own holistic health regimen for several years, to help combat problems related to stomach acidity. “Once I started integrating charcoal into my diet,” Nicely tells Sprudge, “I saw the benefits of it right away. That’s what compelled me to want to share it with people.”

But there is a darker side to the Goth Latte. Rumors abound around these drinks, and a growing chorus of voices are speaking out warning about the potential dangers they pose.

Most of the information on this topic is pretty scattered, ranging from poppy doctor chats to wacky trend pieces to glorified reblogs. Sprudge wanted to know some facts about the supposed charcoal risks, starting with a practical first question: what was the dosage necessary to interrupt the absorption of medication? I reached out to a doctor friend of mine—Dr. Ross Martini of the Oregon Health Sciences University (OHSU) in Portland, Oregon. (Dr. Martini, it should be disclosed, is the partner of Sprudge co-founder Zachary Carlsen.) Dr. Martini told me that a wide variety of factors influenced whether or not a drug could be disrupted by charcoal: pH of the stomach, where in your GI tract the pill breaks down for absorption, and the drug molecule itself—how big it is, what charge it has, and so on.

Okay, so no magic bullet. But in overdose situations—when charcoal is used for emergencies in hospitals—how much is typically administered? Dr. Martini checked with his toxicology colleagues at OHSU and determined that 50 grams of activated charcoal would be typically administered to combat toxins and prevent absorption.

50 grams! Well if my Goth Latte has just one gram, it’s probably fine, right? That’s 1/50th of the medical dose used to disrupt absorption. And according to the available medical scholarship, the introduction of something like milk—say, in a Goth Latte—could further diminish the effectiveness of activated charcoal:

The addition of some flavoring agents (e.g., milk, ice cream, sherbet, marmalade) are known to reduce the adsorptive capacity, and therefore the efficacy, of activated charcoal and should be avoided in preference to activated charcoal-water slurries; nevertheless, these flavoring agents do not completely compromise the effectiveness of activated charcoal and may be necessary in some circumstances (e.g., administration in pediatric patients) to enhance compliance (Cooney 1995; Dagnone 2002).

So maybe Goth Lattes—not unlike my own experience during my The Cure phase in high school—are just misunderstood.  At such a small dose, mixed with milk, what could possibly be the harm? Turns out the bigger issue relates back to what sorts of medications you’re taking, specifically medications made of very small molecules such as birth control.

When we ran our own admittedly poppy trend piece back in June, a few folks with deeper knowledge of the risks posed by charcoal in drinks reached out in response. One of them is a practicing hospitalist in the Seattle area, Dr. Matthew Powell, who goes by @cocktailmd on Instagram. Dr. Powell helped clear up some of the misconceptions I had about grams and dosage amounts when administering AC in a hospital setting. “The OHSU folks are correct that [doctors] use activated charcoal (AC) in certain types of overdose by administering a 50g dose,” he says. “That megadose is meant to prevent absorption of a megadose of a toxin or medication. It turns out that with all of the microscopic pores in AC there is an extraordinarily high surface area in even just one gram of it—about the same as three or four tennis courts. That surface area is where other substances stick (“adsorption”) to prevent them getting into the system (“absorption”).”

“Not everything sticks,” Dr. Powell says, “but everything that does stick passes through the system and out the other end without adversely affecting the person.” Dr. Powell continued (bold emphasis from Sprudge):

“What does stick well? Lots of different medications. The ratios matter, so one gram of AC wouldn’t have as much effect on half a gram of medication, but that same dose of AC is 10,000 times the weight of a common dose of birth control (100mcg) and could potentially adsorb that medication in its entirety,” Powell says.  “Many studies have looked at the reduction in medication effectiveness, and this effect is far from theoretical. For example, 1g of AC taken within five minutes of 500mg of Ciprofloxacin reduces that antibiotic’s effectiveness by about 10%. However, a different antibiotic that was only a 100mg dose was reduced by about 90%. Imagine the effect on birth control pills that are 1/1000th that dose!”

Imagine, indeed! This has been a hot topic of conversation in the cocktail world for years, prompting one doctor to quip to Imbibe, “I’m going to make a cocktail called the See Ya in Nine Months.” And it’s not just The Pill—many medications, including those for issues with depression, anxiety, and thyroid imbalance are made up of lightweight molecules and are especially susceptible to being absorbed by charcoal.

The doctors had spun my head around. I went from thinking that the Goth Latte was a bit of moody, synth-drenched fun, like the A-side of “The Head on the Door” to a realization that the drink was far more frightening and consequential than I could even fathom, like the B-side of “Seventeen Seconds.” But it’s not all tears dripping through dark eyeliner: Dr. Powell notes that activated charcoal can only disrupt medications it’s in direct contact with. “Medication taken four hours before or after AC wouldn’t be likely to come in contact with it,” he told me, “but the closer they are taken together, the stronger the interaction. Just think how many people take their medication in the morning before heading out the door to grab a coffee before work and you can imagine that many people will fall well within that four-hour window.”

Egads, this sounds like a public health risk! Surely this stuff must be regulated? Surely doctors are warning their patients not to ingest activated charcoal when prescribing medications that might be impacted by it? I asked Dr. Martini, is charcoal something doctors are starting to discuss with their patients? “Never,” he tells me. (Actually, it was in all-caps via text: “NEVER”.) “It would have to be a blanket statement given for all drugs, and since charcoal is unregulated, it’s impossible to tell what you’re really ingesting.”

But surely the FDA must be involved and have some oversight? “Even for herbal medications, the FDA just needs to know that what you are putting in it is literally not poison,” says Dr. Martini. “It’s about as regulated as McDonald’s.”

Unregulated, potentially harmful to a wide variety of medications, with no warning by the modern medical community. So what’s the moral of this story? Charcoal in foodstuffs are undeniably cool-looking, and the Goth Latte speaks for a forgotten generation of emotional outcasts—this much we know. But if you take certain medications, you should really, really be careful about consuming this stuff, whether it’s in your coffee drink, curated artisanal pre-squozen lemonade, Instagram ice cream cone, suspender-y urban apothecary cocktail parlo(u)r, Eater Steam List neo-artisan pizza pop-up, or what-have-you.

Meanwhile back at Menotti’s, Nicely is still offering charcoal drinks to curious customers—including enthusiastic nutritionists who champion the health benefits of charcoal—albeit with an updated caveat, and a new warning. “I think we need to appreciate why [charcoal] is used for medical purposes, and that’s why I’ve been using it myself,” he tells me. “When people order these drinks, I can tell them how it’s helped me—it comes from a true place of inspiration—but I’ve also put an asterisk on the menu to warn people to be careful if they’re taking medication.”

If you’re one of the millions of perfectly normal people who take medication regularly, for any reason, you should talk to your doctor about the risks of consuming activated charcoal, because there definitely are some. The truth is out there.

Jordan Michelman is a co-founder and editor at Sprudge Media Network. Read more Jordan Michelman on Sprudge. 

Photos by Jordan Michelman for Sprudge Media Network. 

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