#also lost a pill bottle but i found it (also my glasses just now) so yeah

[999moreyears]

*girls who are so brave forever

[ironstrange1991]

Baby, I'm the lucky one

Pairing: Defender!Strange x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: Defender is having a rough day and his wife comes to help him to relax.

Word Count: 5,9k

Warnings: SMUT: Thigh riding, blow job, cum eating, p n v sex, creampie.

A/N: It's finally here! It took me a long time to finish this one and I really hope it's worth the wait. I made it very romantic and although it had already appeared in some of my headcanons, seeing Eric inspired me with the glasses thing and is Vincent in the pic, but I can only see Defender in it so bare with me and have a nice reading ;)

The sound of approaching footsteps in the hallway informed Stephen that he was no longer alone in the Sanctum. He thought he heard the creaking of a portal and now the sound of boots on the floor confirmed it. Sighing, he closed the huge old book he was reading and took off his glasses, placing them on the desk and pressing the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger.

Defender Strange was having a rough day, to say the least. It was actually a rough week that came right after a terrible mission. It seemed that the problems were piling up and he could no longer keep up with them, much less solve them before another one came up. To make matters worse, in addition to the feeling of helplessness he felt with each new impossible situation that was brought to him hoping he would magically find a solution for them, he also felt guilty for being so busy the last few days that he could barely pay attention to his pregnant wife.

The recently discovered pregnancy had been quite a surprise and was definitely not planned, but Stephen was happy with it, he just wished it had happened at a calmer time, but then again, there would ever be some calmer time in his life since he took on the position of Sorcerer Supreme and leader of the Defenders? Of course not.

The sound of footsteps got closer then stopped and Stephen heard a soft knock on the door to which he responded with a quick "Come in."

Wong entered the room with an expression in his face that told Stephen the master was bringing bad news.

"Tell me" Defender asked, putting on his glasses again and rummaging through the desk drawers for the pack of painkillers he had left there days before. It was true to say that excessive work combined with worries and poor diet over the last few days were contributing to his migraines. This time he decided to take a pill as soon as the first symptoms appeared in the hope of being spared of another terrible one.

Upon finding the pack, he took the pill and got up, heading towards the small corner table where he left a bottle of whiskey and two glasses arranged on a tray. He poured a dose and took it in one gulp along with the pill while listening to Wong explaining how preparations for the next mission had been halted because two of the masters who were supposed to go with the Defenders ended up injured in a battle against an interdimensional entity that had been released into the Kamar Taj by a curious student.

"I'm afraid we'll have to postpone it or else..."

Wong didn't finish what he was going to say, but Stephen added, "I'll have to go."

Wong sighed "It's been a rough few days for sure, but things will calm down like they always do."

Defender sat down again and pointed to the book he was reading "I haven't found any spell that can repair the damage caused by Nightmare in the passages of the Dream Realm. If we can't fix that we will have more problems in our world and that is something that I cannot allow. Lives have already been lost."

"It was not your fault." Wong stated and then suggested the same thing that Stephen had spent all afternoon considering.

"Perhaps it is time to request an audience with the Vishanti. You are the Sorcerer Supreme and only you can do it."

He nodded, "I don't think there will be any other alternative, but in any case I will continue my research into the night. Why would I rest, right?" He said bitterly and watched Wong's lips form a thin line.

"I feel like I'm failing you, my friend, especially at this time when your personal life is changing."

"But a Sorcerer Supreme must place his duties above his personal life, Wong. You know this very well because you were the one who told me this so many times." Defender responded dryly and then shook his head and spoke again in a calmer voice. "I'm sorry. You're a good mentor and a great friend, Wong. You've never failed me. You never could."

Wong nodded but pressed the issue "Strange, you need to take care of your pregnant wife. She needs you now more than ever."

Stephen ran his hand over his face, sighing heavily. "And how do you suggest I do that while jumping from mission to mission, meeting to meeting, and spending days and nights studying magic books in this office?"

Wong's answer was firm and decisive, "You need to delegate some tasks, Strange. These books, I can take them to the Kamar Taj with me and have them examined by our librarian. If anything important is found, you will be notified. Regarding the mission... I can go in your place if you wish."

Stephen shook his head "You belong at the Kamar Taj, Wong. The place would be a mess without you."

"Do you have a better idea? Besides, Master Hamir can take care of the place in my absense;." Wong insisted. "You already said you don't trust anyone else to do the job. Let me take over this mission and you can have some calmer days to rest."

Stephen knew his friend was right and no matter how much his pride and sense of duty said no, he ended up giving in.

"Fine, but I'll stick with the books tonight. I doubt I'll be able to sleep anyway. You can come get them by the morning."

Wong nodded "I will immediately return to the Kamar Taj to finish the preparations."

"What about the student?"

"Oh, he'll be punished. Don't worry."

Defender nodded watching Wong leave the office and close the door. The footsteps moved further away until they disappeared and the Sanctum was once again plunged into complete silence. IStephen sighed feeling the tiredness of the day hitting him. His eyes felt heavy as he tried to return to his reading, but it wasn't sleep that afflicted him, but an exhaustion so great that it seemed to consume him. He turned his attention back to his books, anyway, and barely noticed the hours passing by.

...

The Sanctum was plunged into darkness when you got home from work and you wondered if Stephen was still at the Kamar Taj at that hour. It was way past 8pm and you were working overtime almost everyday of the week since last week. It was safe to say that the last few weeks had been challenging for you as much it had been for your husband, but although you said everything was okay and that you understood, you knew he blamed himself for spending so little time with you, especially now that you found out about the pregnancy.

It was recent. Your belly wasn’t  showing yet and you hadn't told anyone. Not even your parents knew because you wanted to complete your first trimester before telling the news. Stephen had promised that he would try to spend more time with you, but since then so many things had been happening and demanding his immediate attention that it had become impossible for him to keep his promise and although you said you understood, you knew he blamed himself.

You went straight up to your room, took a shower and changed into comfortable pajamas before looking for Stephen around  the Sanctum and finally finding him in his office leaning over one of his huge books reading until exhaustion.

He tried to smile at you when you opened the door, but you could clearly see that he was not well, tiredness taking over every expression on his beautiful face, his always blue eyes, now darkened behind the lenses of his reading glasses.

"Don't tell me you spent all day here." You said, already knowing the answer.

"Pretty much." He replied sheepishly watching you approach, but instead of sitting in one of the chairs facing him, you walked around the desk and stood next to him waiting for him to turn around and then bending down to kiss him. You tasted whiskey on his lips which wasn't a good sign. Stephen only drank if he was very happy or very upset.

"Tell me how your day was, baby." He said before you had time to ask anything.

You grimaced, “Tiring and boring, but okay.”

He chuckled, "I guess that sums mine up too. Don't we make quite a pair?"

You nodded, watching him bring his hand to your belly and gently feel it. "And the baby?"

You smiled, "You know it's too early for me to feel anything, right? But overall I think it's okay. The morning sickness is killing me though."

He nodded, bending forward and placing a small kiss on your belly that made your heart flutter in your chest.

"I know I've been really busy the last few days, but I promise things will calm down." He said looking away as if he felt too guilty to look at you. You cupped his face and lifted his chin making him look at you.

"Stephen, it's okay. I get it. We've been together long enough for me to understand how things work." You assured "Besides, I have been working a lot too."

"I made you a promise..." He started to say, but you interrupted him by placing your index finger on his lip.

"I won't hold it against you, baby. I knew full well what I was getting myself into when I married the Sorcerer Supreme. It's not a job you drop anytime you want and get vacations from."

He allowed himself a sigh and you realized how much he needed to hear those words. In fact, looking at him closely you noticed how much more tired he seemed, how dark circles were appearing under his eyes and the lines on his forehead seemed deeper.

"Did you eat something?" You asked, again, already knowing the answer. He just shook his head.

"You've barely slept lately, Stephen. You know you need to rest or your body will end up forcing you to stay in bed one way or another." You said as your hand tugged on his hair tie and let his soft hair fall down his shoulders in a cascade of dark and silver strands.

"I care about you, baby." You confessed, placing the hair tie on your wrist and combing the strands with your fingers, gently undoing the knots. That small gesture that you had already repeated countless times was always enough to disarm him and as you expected, he hummed contently and moved the chair away from the desk, enough to pull you by the wait waist to position you in front of him. You straddled one of his thighs and he wrapped his strong arms around your waist and leaned forward to kiss you harder this time.  You cupped his face feeling your body melt before him and your stomach turned in that specific way that only he made you feel.

When you broke the kiss he glanced at you from behind the lenses of his glasses and you smiled "You look super cute with glasses, you know that?"

He blushed and instinctively reached to take them off as if only at that moment he had realized that he was wearing them in front of you, but you stopped him and kissed him again, feeling his hands return to your waist and the sensation in your stomach increased. You buried your face in his neck admitting. "I miss you, baby. You've barely touched me this last week and I know it's not your fault, but I really miss it."

"I know. I miss you too. Come here, kiss me."

You kissed him hard, your fingers immediately tangling themselves in his hair and a soft moan escaped his throat. The sound made you lose your composure. Without you realizing exactly what you were doing, your hips began to move back and forth, riding his muscular thigh and desperately looking for some friction.

You and Stephen had an amazing sex life and you weren't used to going without sex for a long time and eight days was a lot for you.  You needed him like air to breathe and your body searched for him instinctively.

He sighed contentedly as his hands slid from your waist to your bare thighs, his fingers digging into the soft fat there helping you move.

"You know I wasn't absent for lack of desire, don't you? I was just very tired." Stephen made a point of explaining and you smiled and bit your lower lip as you increased the movements of your hips and a moan escaped your lips. "I know. But I can help you relax a little if you let me."

Stephen nodded, raising one of his hands to your ass and squeezing your cheek as he lifted your chin and made you look into his eyes while grinding yourself shamelessly in his thigh. "I'm sure you can, but right now it seems like you're more interested in seeking your own pleasure, right?"

You knew he was just teasing. Stephen's altruism extended to bed as well. He was always more concerned about satisfying you than satisfying himself.

"Its been too long" You complained. "I spent the whole week thinking about making love to you. You barely slept by side this week. I even tried to resolve the issue myself, but I couldn't cum, it's as if my body refused to have pleasure without you there."

Stephen eyes glanced at you in complete awe "That's so beautiful, baby. You have no idea how happy you make me by telling me this."

"But now I want to make you relax, to give a little bit of a special attention to my beloved husband." You insisted, cupping his face and moaning again, but contradicting what you just said, you started to move faster, rotating your hips and looking for the delicious pressure that Stephen's thigh muscle provided on your clit and feeling yourself getting wetter between your legs, the wetness soaking his pants and making him hiss in pure surprise and satisfaction.

"It's okay love, you know I love providing pleasure for you. You have no idea how hard I am right now." He confessed lacing his fingers in your hair and tugging then a little bit.

"You're going to show me, aren't you? Tell me what you want me to do to make you feel better, baby."

Stephen smiled humming contemplatively to himself. "You're already doing it."

Resting both hands on Stephen's shoulders, you forced yourself against him, increasing the intensity of the friction and moaning, surrendering to your pleasure and a wave of heat took over you as your body found the ecstasy you were so desperately looking for.

Stephen kissed you passionately, his tongue searching for yours, sucking it lightly. He broke the kiss with a teasing bite on your lower lip and when you finally opened your eyes and allowed yourself to look at him there was a beautiful smile on his face that showed perfect teeth while also showing the crow's feet around his eyes. God, your man was so handsome.

"Satisfied?" He teased to which you immediately shook your head.

"Not until I make you forget all your worries."

"And who said I'm worried?" He replied, caressing your cheek with the back of his hand.

"The whiskey I tasted in your tongue."

He hummed "You know me way too much for me to lie to you, isn't it?"

"I don't even know why you try." You said, placing a strand of hair behind his ear.

"Want to tell me about it? I know there's not much I can do to help, but I can listen. You don't have to be the leader of the Defenders or the Sorcerer Supreme when you're with me. You can be just Stephen."

He listened silently glancing at you with tenderness and then nodded "I thank you every day for that." He said and then smiled and you noticed a slight flush in his cheeks. "I know it's cheesy to say this, but I really am a lucky man to have you as my wife, Y/n. I could never ask for a better woman."

You smiled broadly. You were used to your husband's constant compliments and it was safe to say that although he wasn't given to public displays of affection, behind close doors he was the most affectionate man in the world.

"Maybe it's a little cheesy, but I never get tired of hearing you say it." You confessed, getting up from his lap and feeling your face heat up when you saw the wet circle on his pants.

"Let's go to bed. You need to rest." You said, taking his hand and pulling lightly, hoping he would agree easily, but he didn't move a muscle and shoot you an apologetical glance.

"I promised Wong I would finish this tonight."

You sighed "Stephen..."

"I know, but Wong will take my place on the next mission and that will give me a few days off to rest. I promise things will be calmer and we will have plenty of time for both of us."

You smiled, surrendering to his charm, but not completely convinced.

"Sounds good, but it doesn't change the fact that you need some rest tonight." You said looking angrily at the gigantic books on his desk as if they were your most hated enemies and then you smiled to yourself "Perhaps... I think I can help you with that."

"With my reading?" He asked, knowing full well that it wasn't what you meant.

But you just smile, pushing his chair back to give you more space and kneeling between his legs. The act itself was self-explanatory and Stephen let out a satisfied groan.

"Will you give me your mouth, baby girl?" He asked with a dose of extra sweetness in his voice.

You bit your lower lip feeling your heart flutter with the pet name. "Do you want it?"

"Always." Defender replied watching you unbuckle his belt and unbutton his pants. The gesture was enough to make his dick throb.

"You're so hard, Stephen." You said taking it in your hands. His cock was so beautiful, big and thick, veiny with a red tip. There was a drop of precum leaking from his slit and you licked it slowly, letting it stick to your tongue in a string and then sucking it into your mouth.

"You did this to me, baby. Seeing you ride my thigh left me like this." He said caressing your face and moving his fingers down to your chin, lifting your face to make you look directly at him. "You are so beautiful. From the moment I met you I knew I would be yours."

You smiled and as if you wanted to prove to him that he was right, you gave a slow and long lick on the back of his cock ending with a light suck on the sensitive head and you kept your eyes locked with his all the time. He moaned and his hips jolted against your mouth involuntarily. You placed light kisses on the side of his length, teasing him.

"Such a tease..." He whimpered, giving in to the desire. "I need to be inside your mouth. I want to feel the heat, the wetness. Such a sweet mouth."

You surrendered to his pleas and took him into your mouth, sucking him slowly and bobbing your head up and down while swirling your tongue around him to give him maximum pleasure.

Maybe Stephen didn't know, maybe he was so selfless that he lacked the ability to understand that you loved him just the same. That he was worthy of being loved in that proportion and even more.

He considered himself the luckiest man in the world to have you in his life, but you knew that in reality, you were the lucky one to have the love of a man so decent, so courageous and most importantly, so caring and attentive.

His moans filled the room and reached your ears like music as you pleasured him slowly, rotating your hand along what you couldn't take in your mouth without gagging.

"So good to me, baby... doing so good to me." He muttered softly almost as if speaking to himself.

You let go of his cock to use both hands to brush your hair out of your face and twist it into a bun and then direct one of Stephen's hands to your head to keep it there. Stephen complied by grabbing your hair in a fistful, but he didn't push, he just accepted what was being given to him willingly.

You returned your attention to your work, working your mouth and tongue along the entire length of his cock, stopping only to draw a breath of air into your lungs and then returning to pleasure him.

"Oh baby it's so good." He said as his dick pulsed in your mouth. "Can I cum in your mouth?" He asked. He always asked even if the answer was always yes.

You hummed positively feeling the weight of his other hand on your head and hot cum filling your mouth as he moaned and gasped for air. "Oh baby..." He let out a loud groan when you took him out of your mouth. "Fuck, such a sweet mouth. You are so good to me." He said caressing your cheek affectionately. "This was amazing. Thank you."

You gulped his cum down unceremoniously and responded with a proud smile as you put his cock back inside his pants.   You stood up, taking his hand again and pulling him to stand up too, but he gave you that apologetical look again making you roll your eyes.

"I know you don't want to leave here before you finish your work, but we can stay. Your office is comfortable enough. I just need you and I think you need me too."

He hesitated for a moment, but then something in your face, probably the way you batted your eyelashes at him, made him chuckle and get up from the chair.

"You know you can get anything from me when you give me that look, don't you?" He said pinching your cheek.

"Anything? Really?" You confirmed.

"Anything." He said wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him. You chuckled and wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him softly. "Then leave work for later and make love to me."

Stephen hummed allowing himself to be pulled across the room. There was a small two-seater recamier in front of the unlit fireplace and that was exactly where you led him.

The night was particularly cold so Stephen lit the fireplace with a quick and almost imperceptible gesture of his fingers and in the same way he locked the door to his office. At the beginning of your relationship he tried not to use magic in front of you, but now, years later, you were used to small things like this.

You touched his face and pulled him to your lips, kissing him like you haven't done it in days, hungrily, thirstily and most of all passionately. And oh, how he loved it when you kissed him like that.

Your hands began to unbuckle his belts and he let himself be undressed slowly, piece by piece while you devoured him with your eyes. There was something about the passion with which you looked at him that made him feel like the luckiest man on earth.

Stephen never had trouble getting a lay. Women used to throw themselves into his arms in the days when he worked as a surgeon at the hospital and he had fucked pretty much every woman that worked there, but none of that could be compared to what he had with you. You were the first woman Stephen made love to. And before, he swore that the term was nothing more than a silly romanticization of sex, but you changed his mind. You changed him completely and he knew that no sex in the world could compare to making love with someone who truly loves you.

"What is it?" You asked, probably noticing the way he looked at you as you helped him get rid of his underwear, leaving him completely naked for you. Your eyes left his for a second to see what you should already know. He was ready for you again. In fact, there was no way he wouldn't be when your eyes seemed to burn his skin with desire.

"I love you, Y/n. I know I've said this a million times, but I..."

You kissed him again, interrupting him and then nodded "And I love you. You have no idea how in love I am with you and every day I feel like I love you more."

He smiled feeling your hand running down his chest and going to where he needed you most at that moment. You grabbed him and pumped him slowly up and down and he cupped your face with both hands resting his forehead on yours "These hands..."

You just smiled, squeezing your hand around him a little tighter and then gently pushing him to sit down and proceeding to undress yourself for him. You were so beautiful. Your hair, Your eyes, the shape of your body, everything was so inviting.

You started by taking off your pajama top. You weren't wearing anything underneath it, so he was treated to the wonderful view of your breasts, the nipples hardened by the cold night air. You caressed one of your breasts to tease him, knowing full well how much he loved them. Then you reached down and took off your shorts and panties, quickly kicking them to the side on the floor and walked over to him with a proud smile on your lips. 

You knew. You knew exactly what the sight of your naked body did to your husband and you liked it.

"Come here, baby. Let me touch you. You said you miss my touch." He said.

You nodded holding the hand he extended to you and straddling his thighs.

You took both hands to the temples of his glasses and gently took them off and put them on with a smile plastered on your face. Stephen couldn't help his own smile.

"What do you think?" You asked with a cute pout.

"Charming. It looks much better on you than it does on me, that's for sure."

You shook your head, removing the glasses and placing them to the side. "I like you with glasses, even though you don't like me to see you wearing them."

Stephen stroked your cheek. "I'm a vain man. It's hard to accept that I have to wear them, let alone that you see me with them."

 "Silly." You said, leaning in to kiss him and Stephen wasted no time, he needed to be inside you. He missed you as much as you missed him.

He spat into his hand and rubbed the saliva over the red, extremely sensitive head and directed it towards your entrance. You both moaned loudly as you let yourself sink down onto his cock, the penetration easy but tight. Stephen loved how you felt so warm and wet around him, it felt so good. To be inside you always felt like home.

There was nothing in the world that compared to the feeling of having Stephen inside you. He was big, thick, but not only that, he was the love of your life.

His hands grabbed your waist as you began to move slowly, rotating your hips sensually and feeling him fill every inch of you. You closed your eyes and increased the pace, your hand seeking support on his shoulder, the other twisting a nipple between your fingers.

"Just like that, baby. You look so beautiful riding me like this. Feels so good."

He pulled you to his lips and kissed you hard, his hips thrusting up which made you moan between his lips. He brought one hand between you and started circling your clit with it which made your entire body shake on top of his and he hummed in satisfaction. "So sensitive. Tell me, was it that touch you were missing so much?"

You nodded vehemently "Oh yes" You responded increasing the pace of your hips as you moved up and down, fucking him, but it didn't feel like It was enough, you needed more.

"Baby please..." You murmured between countless tireless kisses "...need more."

He immediately held your waist and started thrusting up, going deep and giving you the relief you wanted. A little scream left your lips as he reached that special spot inside you.

"Yes, yes, yes..." You screamed amid the sound of your bodies colliding "Oh my god, baby..." But he interrupted your cries with a hungry kiss as he held you tight in his arms and got up dragging you to the floor.  Your back touched the plush rug and his lips trailed down your chin and neck until they found their destination on your breasts. He held them with both trembling hands as he sucked one nipple and then the other and gave small bites to your skin, hiding his face between them and moaning as he did so.

"Stephen..." You begged and he surrendered. He directed his dick back to your entrance and slowly penetrated you, burying his face in the crook of your neck while your legs were intertwined behind his back and he began to thrust slowly, but putting more strength and intensity with each thrust until he reached a hard rhythm.

You wrapped your arm around his back, nails digging into his flesh while the other got lost in the sea of ​​dark and silver hair, fingers tangling in the soft strands, pulling them with each thrust that was quickly taking you to your limit.

Your moans right in his ear and your fingers tugging at his hair in rhythm with each thrust were triggers that were driving Stephen to his limit. He could feel his balls tightening, his cock was pulsing deliciously and he didn't want to fight it. He was in paradise, lost between your legs he felt like the happiest man in the world. He searched for your lips and kissed you hard feeling your walls contract around him.

"Baby tell me you're close" He asked between your lips and you nodded.

"Yes baby, so close. No need to hold it. Just give it to me." You said between desperate kisses on his lips. You knew him so well, he even needed to tell you that he was about to cum. You simply knew how to read all the signs on his body.

Stephen moaned loudly surrendering to his own pleasure. He gave three more strong thrusts and then stopped, burying his face in your neck and moaning deliciously in your ear. The sound was the ultimate trigger that launched you straight into your high as you felt him filling you with hot cum and your walls contracted around him as your legs trembled beneath him.

"Oh baby I love you." He whispered in your ear before allowing himself to look at you. There was a beautiful smile on his lips and tenderness in his blue eyes. All the tiredness you saw in them seemed to have disappeared.

...

The Sanctum was dark and silent when Wong stepped through the portal into the main hall. However, the light emanating through Defender's office door showed that the Sorcerer Supreme was still engrossed in his tireless work.

That made Wong sigh. A man needed to recognize that he was just a man and needed rest like any other human being.

Wong devoted himself to the duty that brought him there in the first place and was about to leave when he decided to beg Stephen to go to sleep. He knocked and waited. The sorcerer's voice came soon after.

"Yes."

Wong tried the handle, but the door was locked, which was strange.

"Can I come in?" He asked and when he heard a chuckle coming from the room he understood.

"I don't think it would be appropriate at the moment." Defender replied and another chuckle was heard. "Is it something important? Give me two minutes. I'll meet you in the lounge."

Wong smiled to himself. All his worries melting away. "No. It's okay. I talked to everyone involved and we managed to work out the latest plans for the mission. We'll leave tomorrow night. I'll keep you informed. Take the opportunity to rest, Stephen."

He turned to leave and then he heard Y/n's familiar voice "Good night, Wong."

"Indeed, my dear." He muttered to himself opening a portal back to Kamar Taj. The Sorcerer Supreme would be fine as long as he had his wife to make sure that happened."

...

"He's going to be traumatized." You said, laughing softly.

Although the night was cold, the heat coming from the fireplace combined with the heavy blanket Stephen had conjured and his own body heat were more than enough to keep you warm.

He was lying with his back on the rug and his arm extended to support your shoulders. Your legs were tangled with his lazily.

"He should be pretty used to it by now." He responded caressing your cheek with the back of his hand. "He was worried about me, just like you. That's why he offered to go on the mission in my place."

You nodded, lifting your head to stare at him. "I know things get difficult sometimes, but you need to learn to delegate, Stephen. Especially now."

"I know." He sighed and you noticed how he looked less tired now. You didn’t really think you could save him of all his problems, but it was undeniable that he felt better when he spent quality time with you.

"He knows." Stephen confessed.

You smirked knowing exactly what he was talking about. "I thought we agreed to keep it a secret until the end of the first trimester."

He nodded. "I needed to tell him. Wong is my best friend and my right-hand man. He helps me manage this madness that is Kamar Taj. He needed to know and besides, I know you two are going to be okay and I can't wait to see it growing inside of you."  He said, lowering his hand to your belly and keeping it there.

"Still, I'd rather wait before telling anyone else. Promise me you won't tell anyone else."

"I promise."

You smiled "Are you really happy with it? I know we weren't planning on it."

"I'm very happy. And terrified." He said chuckling and you cupped his face and kissed him.

"Me too. But I know we can do this because we have each other."

Stephen nodded and tilted his head up to kiss you again, this time harder and then turned around putting you underneath him, his hips pushing his way between your legs, his face lost in the sea of ​​your hair taking a deep breath and then kissing you again .

"You're like medicine to me, you know? It's incredible how you can make me feel better when I'm having a hard day. I was on the verge of a terrible migraine, but now I'm cured."

You held his face in your hands and smiled proudly "It's good to know that I have such power over the great Sorcerer Supreme."

He kissed you and lightly bit your lower lip "You have no idea" He said grounding his fast hardening cock against your core, which made you moan softly into his lips.

"Again?" You confirmed, watching him bring a hand between you. He rubbed himself a few times and then entered you again.

“Fuck yes.” He responded with a groan.

It seemed that the books had been long forgotten.

Reblog please! Leave a comment if you liked it. Interact! I will love to read all of your comments and opinions. It inspires me to keep writing!

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[behindthescenesoftaylor]

The Person I Used To Be.(Kyle x reader)

(I did not proofread this or edit because I’m lazy so if there is any mistakes or things that seem weird, tell me. Also if you have any tips or requests send those my way PLEASE.

Warning: This story contains mature themes including drug use, self-harm, and underage drinking. Reader discretion is advised. It may be triggering for some individuals.

(Characters are 17, this was based off deftone’s- Change.)

After (y/n)’s mom dies from an overdose, (y/n) finds herself lost in drug and alcohol. Kyle is concerned with this, she’s changed, she’s not the person she used to be

Kyle stood there against the wall with his arms crossed, an unpleasant feeling settling deep in his stomach. he was looking at (y/n), she was surrounded by people, younger and older. They cheered for her as she took another shot, the burn making her flinch but oh how she loved the feeling.

“Yes (y/n)!!!”

“Atta girl!”

“Get it hottie!”

She slammed the glass back onto the table and put her arms up in unison. The now empty glass was put aside as the 12th graders pulled out pill bottles and blade. The people around her started cheering once again.

“Hey! Does anybody have a bill?” A 10th grader asked and Kyle could see (y/n) getting out a single 5$ bill. They boy put the pills onto the table and began to crush them before formatting them into multiple single lines.

“I get to go first, since i won the shot contest!” (Y/n) slurred, a fat smile spreading onto her lips. Kyle hated the way the other boys looked at her, as if she was just an object. (Y/n) took the bill and rolled it up before placing it at the beginning of the line and sniffing all the way down. She took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, feeling the adrenaline.

“Fuck that was hot” a boy said, others nodding in agreement. Kyle furrowed his eyebrows in a silent anger, a flashback coming to him.

(Y/n) and Kyle sat in the waiting room, his hand was over her thigh as she chewed on her nail nervously. Her mother had been admitted after she found her on the floor, pill bottles in her hand. Tears leaked down her face as Kyle tried to comfort her, to his disappointment, it wasn’t working.

“Fuck, Kyle she told me she quit! She- she told me she was sober?! This is all my fault- it’s all my fault, i should have looked m-“

Her talking stopped as the doctor walked out of the door, his hands to his side. (Y/n) immediately stood up and rushed to the doctor.

“How is she? Is she okay?” She questioned. The doctor stood there with a frown for a second, the words leaving his mouth as soon as he saw the little girl, alone, sobbing.

“IS SHE OKAY?” She repeated frantically

“Ms. (L/n), I’m sorry to say this-“ the world went silent as he said the words, her hand flew over her mouth in shock as she back upped in disbelief until she couldn’t no more, hitting the wall. She slid down, and Kyle walked to her, sitting beside her and wrapping her in a huge hug as she sobbed and sobbed. Her cries echoing, leaving the day feeling empty for everyone who could hear.

Kyle shook his head, leaving his thoughts as a the song changed. (Grind on me by pretty ricky) He looked back and saw (y/n) getting up with Clyde . They went to the middle of the floor and started to dance, she turned with her back facing the clydes front and began to rub against him. (Y/n) was too high from the drugs and too drunk to process what she was doing, she was just caught in the moment. She tuned back around and Clyde began to kiss her neck as she continued to sway her hips.

Kyle freaked at this, this was his last straw, you were way to under the influence for this. He marched up to you and grabbed you by your arm roughly, pulling you away from Clyde and outside into his car. “Ow Kyle, what the fuck?!”

“Your coming to my house until this shit wears of (y/n), this is so irresponsible of you, I’m disappointed.” He says, quickly buckling in his seatbelt and starting the car.

“Dissapointed? Okay mother” she said back. Kyles head tuned back and forth as his eyes focused on the road infront of him. The ride to his house was short, taking less than 3 minutes to get there, and as soon as they parked Kyle was out of the door pulling (y/n) along with him.

Her footings were stumbled and she struggled to walk without tripping, Kyle had to hold her up for her to actually get in his house, unharmed. He was lucky that his family wasn’t home, they were currently in another state, for ikes hockey tournament.

They reached the living room before she lost her footing and she fell, hitting her head on the couch and her arm on the table.

“Goddammit, (y/n) are you okay?” Kyle questioned.

(y/n) got up and began to spin around, a feeling of bliss enlightening her. “I’m amazing Kyle! It’s so calming.”

Kyle shook his head and took her by the arm again, they got to the kitchen and suddenly, he picked her up.

“Wee!” (Y/n) said, it might just have been a couple feet but to her it felt like she was flying, the effects of the cross fade getting to her. Kyle placed her on the counter, making sure she was steady, and he hurriedly got the first aid kit, hoping she wouldn’t fall in the meantime.

Once he got it he went back and set it down beside her. She sat there looking into the distance, smiling. Kyle opened the box, took out the alchohol, and light pored it onto a cotton ball. His hands gently held her face as he bagan to dab it on the cut from the fall.

He then placed a bandaid on it, but unlike before, this time she gripped his arm. Her hands venturing up until she reached his cheek, Kyle sat there staring into her eyes. She spreads her legs, giving him room to stand between and pulled him in close, but before their lips could meet, he pulled away.

“Your drunk, (y/n)” he turned away, staring to the floor.

“So? I’m also high of coke, what about it?”

“Are you serious right now (y/n)?! What about it?!”

By this point Kyle was straight on yelling, his emotions getting the better of him.

“Your such a fucking party pooper kyle!” She hopped off the counter and began to walk out of the door, with the intention of going back to the party. She was not in the mood to deal with this.

He pulled her by her sleeve away from the door and took her to the bathroom, blocking the exit, she wasn’t going to get away this time.

“Party?! (Y/n) all that was, was a drug fest! You know it and i know it.”

“Kyle move!” She yelled trying to push him out of the way. He just shook his head no, refusing to let her out until she composed herself.

“Fine if i can’t go to the party, I’ll bring the party to me.” (Y/n) exclaimed as she slammed open the medicine cabinet and pulled out a random bottle. Kyle quickly grabbed her and pinned her to the ground, ripping the bottle out of her hand.

“(Y/n) are you serious? What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He yeld, holding her down. She struggled against him and tried to pry herself from his hands.

“Kyle i need it, I need it Please” she begged, longing for the feeling of the pills. “Please ky”

“(Y/n) don’t you see, this is how your mom died, i don’t want that to happen to you!!”

“Ky, it numbs me, all the pain leaves and even if just for a few hours! I don’t want to feel anymore pain, please Kyle, please.” She began to sob, her chest bouncing against him. He picked her up bridal style when she went limp, carrying her to his bed as she continued to cry.

“Shh” he said while setting her down under the covers and laying next to her, he took her smaller figure into his arms and wrapped tight as she just stared at the wall. Soon after, she fell asleep.

—

The next day she awoke still in his arms, hearing little snouts pouring out of his mouth. The headache from the hangover began as she moaned loudly and rolled out of the bed, away from his arms.

Kyle woke up, confused, seeing her on the ground holding her head. He realized that she was probably hungover, so he got up and got some medicine for her and placed it next to the water he placed on the table.

“Here” he said gently, his smooth voice making her heart flutter. She slowly grabbed the pills and the water and gulped them down, she then slid to sit against the wall with her knees to her chest, leaving an awkward silence around the room.

“So last night was eventful, I’m guessing” she said. She couldn’t really remember anything, just Kyle taking her here.

“(Y/n), this needs to stop. It’s unhealthy and dangerous.” He declared, looking at her from the bed. “It’s changing you.”

“Changing me? How? Because i don’t give a fuck now?!” She said, her voice slowly rising. He let out a sigh and ran his hands through his hair.

“People aren’t Supposed to feel numb, (y/n), that’s why the drugs are fucking illegal. You dyed your hair, got piercings, and your attitude has just changed! You’re doing the one thing you promised you wouldn’t ever do!”

“well people fucking change Kyle!” She yelled angrily, a scowl on her face.

“Not like this (y/n)! Your changing too much and unnaturally!! Your not the person i used to love anymore.”

Her angry facial expression immediately left, he used to love her? He got up from the bed and raced out of the room. “Kyle- Kyle wait!”

He ignored her and grabbed his keys, rushing inside his car. The car began to back up as she exited the house, leaving her there by herself, with the thought of him saying he used to love her, alone.

[daily-jin-madebygenius]

P- Poli!

As Jin was about to connect Poli to the dropper, his trembling body stopped shaking and started slipping further from her.

The inventor felt her eyes fill with tears, not minding the chaos happening behind her. Her mind brought her back to the first time Poli ever got shot. His body weak and cold.

But this was worse.

Regulus! Come on Regy-- You can't do this to me now!

He lost too much blood.

Too much... And Jin wasn't sure if she could keep him with her.

The pain from treating his wounds must've also done its job.

There must be something to help him!

The girl began looking around her. She refused to give up on her brother. Her prayers seemed to be heard as she found an untouched bottle of water in her kit and... Paracetamol?

How was that to help? But it's worth a try.

Grabbing the objects Jin helped Poli drink a couple of pills. Here.. These should help.

You'll feel better once I connect you to the dropper.

She returned to the bag of oil, finally piercing the needle through the vein in the least damaged place. Holding her hand with the bag as high as possible, she watched the black blood travel the tube toward the vein.

The vein of her brother. He looked awful. So cold compared to his still warm oil. The only thing giving away the fact that he was still alive was his breathing. But even it was quiet yet heavy and uneven.

Jin couldn't fight back her tears anymore. With one hand still raised in the air holding the dropper, the sun buried her face into the star's shoulder, staining itself further with blood. Even though she couldn't shine anymore, the sun tried to give whatever remained of her warmth to her brother with desperate pleas.

Poli... Please. It's over. It's all over. We won... You can't die now! What about about the others?! Roy, Amber, Helly. How should they l-live without you?... How should I live without you?

My saviour.

My family.

My brother.

She buried her face further into his shoulder, staining herself where her scars were. She pressed her lips and forehead again the wound and shattered glass, hoping that somehow would heal what her hands couldn't. She saw many mothers do that, maybe that'll work for them.

Jin switched her cries to Korean. She didn't want to think about it, but if those were really Poli's last moments, she could at least offer him some more comfort.

G- God, Regy... Stay. I beggin' you! I'm so sorry for everything I said! You're nothing like him... You're the family I never had, and I'm so grateful for that!

Just stay...

Please, Regulus...

@daily-rcp-poli

Poli wearily sighed out of mere exhaustion arriving at the place. He had injured himself dozens times during a rescue, so why did a self-reflected injury on his hand wear him down so much?

He leans against a pole in the middle of the street, letting him at least relax for a bit. He shudders at the october breeze gently brushing past his metal. It typically never gets cold for him. It.. was really cold now. Even with such a simple gust of air, it still messed with his system.

Andras wasn't here yet.. It felt weird to be one on one like the old times. Painful memories ingrained into his mind as his teacher constantly reprimanded him for his health despite giving it his all.

Lost in own thoughts, he stares into the sky. What was he going to say? What was he going to do?

..And Jin. He felt terrible. He never yells at her like that. He was so angry his voice raised without his command. He wanted to cry. Cry to her.

A figure chuckles in the distance.

Hi, Poli. What seems to be troubling you? You just seem so.. lost there. Has anything gotten onto your mind? I'm your former teacher after all,

Speak of the devil..

Andras grins.

A teacher is supposed to handle a student with care.

Poli doesn't reply. Andras wasn't far off when he said he was lost. His confidence to face him was also long gone, now finding his spirit of his first year stuck in a leader. Pathetic, that's what he was.

Poli rolls his eyes and stares off to the other direction when he opens his mouth.

What do you want?

Now that's no way to speak to me. Did you not want to talk?

Right.. His mind was so dazed, he had forgotten about finally confronting him about his crimes. Even if the plan was made messy on the last minute, he was sure he could let justice rise.

Even when events could take a turn for a drastic change when he leasts expects it. Still unaware of the other figures following after him to ensure his safety.

@daily-jin-madebygenius @annintheclouds

[bluewinnerangel]

Here i found a good analysis of Angels Fly and how its a response to Harry's Falling.

Harry: "There's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hands"

Louis: "There were problems in this empty bottle at the bottom but we drained all that"

--

Harry: "What am I now? What am I now?" - crying out

Louis: "You'll be okay, we can talk tomorrow" - it'll be ok

--

Harry: "And it kills me 'cause I know we've run out of things we can say"

Louis: "You'll be ok, we can talk tomorrow, I'm on my way with some time to borrow"

--

Harry: "And I get the feeling that you'll never need me again"

Louis: "I'll knock on your door, it'll save me from callin'" - ill always need you

--

Falling - Harry panicing that he is loosing control. Song is laced with a feeling of panic.

Angels Fly - You will be okay. We will be okay. I am here if you need me.

--

Harry : Im falling

Louis : No babe, youre an angel and youre flying, not falling!

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Credit

Okay I thought I'd try to find parallels myself... I think they're both generic enough that this can work coincidentally but yeah let's entertain it, I guess as Angels Fly as a response to Falling

I'd like to apologize for this use of colors laksjdlksj anyway. Things that stand out to me

Both songs have this duality of not wanting to talk about it and very much wanting to talk about it. Basically we can't talk about it right now but this isn't over there is more to say, just right now I feel like there isn't. Falling is someone stuck in a downwards spiral and Angels Fly could be read as someone trying to be there for someone who is.

The repeating of "I'm falling I'm falling I'm falling" vs "angels fly, high, you'll see angels fly, high" uuf

I highlighted the "and I get the feeling that you'll never need me again" vs "put the pain behind you now you don't need it anymore" because I thought it was a good contrast of someone lost in their thoughts vs someone with some more clarity of what is needed

I also think this one verse in Face The Music fits in this with "Close your eyes and count to ten / If you’re standing on the edge of falling / Open up and looking down / Everything that matters is forgotten" like lines 1/3/4 parallel Angels Fly and then the 2nd drops a falling. It fits with Saved By A Stranger too.

I. fucking. love. "but we drained all that" in Angels Fly. It might be my favorite thing of the whole song. So he's like "there were problems in this empty bottle, at the bottom, but we drained all that", so here he's using "problems in this empty bottle" which makes you think there was substance abuse, whether it was alcohol or pills, then "at the bottom" works in multiple ways already, like you're down-and-out as falling describes but also literally the bottle's empty and you're seeing the bottom, but then "but we drained all that", gives you the visual of throwing the contents of the bottle away, flushing it down the toilet, draining it down the sink, but in the context of the rest of the verse it's "but we've already gone over that and we're past it and about specifically that there's nothing to say anymore", and drained when someone is just completely depleted, exhausted, not much left, but now for my lil larriebrain specifically in relation to falling I'm seeing Harry's affinity to water, I'm seeing nautical watery splashsplashness I'm seeing the Falling music video where the entire concept is him drowning in a room that is being filled with water, that then will need to be drained lol. There's this reoccurring imagery in both their discographies where they're talking about a glass or a swimming pool being in various stages of filled and it's just giving this extra layer for me of draining being both positive and negative here. The glass is empty, they're at the bottom, and it's drained. There's no water. But then it's spun to positive that they drained the problems? yeah something like that.

But as always keep in mind this is just one interpretation of the song, we're just entertaining the thought of one being a response to the other. Or maybe that's not described right, rather that they both have written a song sparked from the same situation.

[jrob64]

Always in My Heart - Ch. 2,  A CS Modern AU story

Here is Chapter 2 of my CS Gift Exchange story for @nachocheese-itsmycheese​, including a new pic set. This chapter has some fluff and special moments, but fair warning, it also contains some serious angst.

Many thanks to @hookedmom​ for being my beta, @cs-rylie​ for being another set of eyes on the story and @kmomof4​ for helping me plot. 

Story Summary: As children in the same foster home, Emma Swan and Killian Jones became best friends. After being separated, they lost touch for 14 years and thought they would never see each other again. 

A chance meeting in London changes everything. 

*Trigger Warning* - cancer

Rating: M (for smut in the last chapter - but can be skipped if that’s not your comfort zone)

Words: (Ch. 2) 8362

Chapter 1 found here on Tumblr

Also posted on Ao3 & ffn

*********

The second time Emma Nolan shared a bed with Killian Jones, she was twenty years old and he was twenty-two. They were best friends reunited after years apart.

Killian began to wake up when he heard whimpers coming from Emma. He pushed up to his elbow and looked at the nightstand, where the green digital clock numbers read 4:33.

“Swan?” he whispered, cautiously scooting a little closer to her.

She didn’t answer, but let out another soft whimper. He could tell she was still asleep, but seemed to be in a bit of discomfort from her injuries.

“Emma?” he tried again, gently nudging her right shoulder.

“Hmm?”

“Are you in pain?”

Her eyes cracked open and she turned her head on the pillow, but he could tell she wasn’t fully awake. “Yeah...it hurts.”

“You need to take more medicine.”

“Uh-uh. It’s dark and I don’t remember where I left the bottle.”

“You should stay ahead of the pain and it’s been several hours since you took anything. I’ll look for it, okay?”

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly. After several seconds, she breathed out a heavy sigh before her eyes popped back open and she said, “Okay.”

Killian slid out of bed and used the light on his phone to look around the room, then went into the bathroom, coming back momentarily with a glass of water and a couple of pills. Setting them on the nightstand, he gently eased his arm around her back and helped her sit up enough to swallow the medicine.

“Thanks,” she murmured, as he lowered her back to the mattress.

He climbed back into bed on his side, moving toward the middle. Reaching over, he massaged her shoulder. ”Sleep now, Swan.”

Closing her eyes, she hummed. “Feels good.”

Happy to bring her some comfort, he continued to rub her arm until he heard her breathing deepen, signifying her return to sleep. He followed soon after.

 *********

During the next three days, Emma and Killian enjoyed the amenities of the ski resort to occupy their time. They spent time in the lodge game room playing darts, billiards and air hockey, enjoyed the hot tub, and watched movies or sat in front of the gas fireplace in the living area of the suite. No matter what they were doing, they carried on lengthy and effortless conversations, filling in the years they missed with each other and remembering all the things they did when they were at the foster home together.

On the final day of the trip, Emma came out of the bathroom after soaking in the large, whirlpool tub, to find the room empty. She checked her phone for a message from Killian, but didn’t find one. Just as she was getting ready to call him, the door opened and he walked in wearing a huge grin.

“What have you been doing that made you so happy?” she questioned good naturedly.

“I just ordered tickets for us to go on the gondola today. The person down at the front desk said they have a shuttle that can take us there. Is that alright with you, Swan?”

“That sounds like fun! I’ve been watching it move up and down the mountain, but didn’t think about going on it ourselves. Will I be able to ride it with my leg like this?”

“I checked into it and it shouldn’t be a problem. The cars are enclosed and look quite spacious.”

“Well, what are we waiting for then?” she asked excitedly.

He helped her don her winter gear and put on his own, then they rode the elevator down to the lobby. As they made their way outside, the shuttle pulled up in front of the building.

It was a short drive down the road to the gondola site. After they purchased their tickets, Emma was permitted to use the handicap access and was boarded promptly. Killian helped her settle into the car before it began gliding up the mountain, giving them a spectacular view of the surrounding scenery. The skiers and snowboarders below looked miniscule, but Emma still tried to locate Mary Margaret in her bright pink snowsuit.

They both thought the ride was over far too quickly, so when they disembarked, Emma offered to buy tickets for another trip. Killian readily agreed and helped her over to the ticket booth. The second time was just as enjoyable, as they pointed out beautiful sights to each other.

After the gondola returned to base, they went into the little snack shop and treated themselves to warm apple dumplings with ice cream, and hot chocolate.

By the time they returned to the resort, it was midday. They went straight up to their room to change out of their heavy winter outerwear, then watched a movie until Mary Margaret and David knocked on their door. The four of them walked over to the lodge and ate together, talking and laughing into the evening.

Once Emma and Killian returned, they packed their suitcases as much as possible, because they were leaving early the next morning. Killian would be taking an Uber to the airport for a flight back to England, and after seeing him off at the lodge, the other three would leave to drive back to Maine.

A sense of melancholy settled over the room as they silently folded their clothes and stuffed them into their bags. Killian made a sweep of the living room area and the bathroom, while Emma double checked all of the dresser drawers and the closet. When they were satisfied that everything was packed except for what they needed in the morning, they sat together on the sofa, the only light coming from the fireplace in front of them.

He draped his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m going to miss you so much,” she sighed.

“I’ll miss you, too,” he agreed sadly, “but I’m very glad we had this time together. And of course we can continue texting and calling each other.”

“Yeah, that’s true. I’m going to bug you so much, you’ll get tired of it.”

He chuckled. “Not a chance. I’ll look forward to it.”

They lapsed back into silence, each lost in their thoughts.

“You’ll let me know what you find out from your MRI, won’t you?” he asked.

“Absolutely. I really hope there are no tears.”

“I pray there aren’t.”

“And you’ll let me know when you get a job, right?”

“Aye. Hopefully, it won’t take long.”

“I pray it won’t.”

She turned her face up to him and smiled. He returned it, then rested his forehead against hers momentarily.

They remained on the sofa, quietly conversing, for another half hour before deciding to go to bed. Once there, both of them had trouble falling asleep, knowing they would be saying goodbye to each other again in just a few hours.

*********

The next morning was a flurry of activity with final packing, a quick breakfast, and loading the bags into David’s car, while Killian waited for the arrival of his Uber. When he received notification that it was two minutes away, he said his goodbyes to Mary Margaret and David, then turned to Emma.

“Let me know when you arrive back home,” he said, taking her hand and giving it an affectionate squeeze.

“You do the same,” she replied. Leaning her crutches against the wall beside her, she wrapped her arms around him. “Please stay in touch, Killian. I don’t want to lose you again.”

“You have my solemn promise, Swan.”

“Thank you for coming. It was the best surprise ever!”

“Thank you for allowing me to crash your vacation.”

Her arms loosened and she looked up at him. “This whole vacation would have sucked if you hadn’t shown up. You’re the only reason I was able to enjoy it at all!”

He chuckled. “Happy to be of service, milady.”

A dark blue SUV pulled up the driveway and stopped in front of them. “Looks like my ride is here,” Killian commented. He hugged her tightly one more time, before releasing her to bend down and pick up his duffle bag.

The driver exited the vehicle and greeted Killian, taking his bag to put it in the back. Killian’s eyes lingered on his friend for several moments. “Goodbye, Emma,” he finally said.

“Goodbye, Killian. I hope I’ll see you again soon.”

“Me, too.” Unable to think of anything else to say, he raised his hand to give her a little wave, then slipped into the back seat of the waiting SUV. He knew she couldn’t see him through the tinted window, but when he looked at her, she was waving and bravely trying to give him a smile anyway.

As the vehicle started down the winding driveway, he watched Emma out the back window until she faded from view, then settled back into the leather seat with a sigh. He had plenty of time to think during the twenty-five minute drive to the airport, and pondered why it hurt more to say goodbye to Emma this time, than it did in London. Maybe back then it was easier because he was already making plans to surprise her in Vermont, but now he thought it was more than that.

His feelings toward his friend had changed in the days he spent with her and he wasn’t exactly sure when it happened. He simply knew the longer he was with her, the harder it was to keep from kissing her. Their long conversations allowed him to see the woman his childhood friend had become, and he liked what he saw. He was attracted to her wit, humor, intelligence and beauty.

Now the question was, what could he do about it from thousands of miles away?

*********

Emma stood, rooted to the spot, as she watched the SUV disappear, taking Killian away from her yet again. The pain she felt in her heart was almost as bad as the pain in her injured leg, and she wasn’t sure she was ready to examine the reason why.

She wasn’t a person who made friends easily. As a child, it didn’t take her long to come to the conclusion it wasn’t worth the effort. After Killian left, she was never in one place long enough for anyone to get to know her. She was always the ‘new girl’ who warranted stares and whispers, but rarely a genuinely warm welcome from classmates or foster siblings.

When she was adopted by the Nolans, she tagged along with David, and eventually his friends became her friends, too. They all thought of her as their little sister and included her whenever they played sports in the backyard. By the time she entered junior high, she was one of the best female athletes in her grade and began making friends with some of her teammates.

No matter how many friends she made though, none of them took Killian’s place in her heart. He was her first friend, her best friend, but the feelings she felt now had her thinking she wanted him to be more than just a friend, which was crazy, right?

“Ready to go, Sis?”

Emma startled at David’s voice, not realizing how long she had been standing there contemplating her feelings. “Oh, yeah, I’m ready. Let’s get on the road.”

*********

A week after they parted ways, Killian was happy to learn Emma’s MRI showed no signs of tears in her knee or ankle, and that she was using a cane instead of crutches. He was able to share his good news about being offered a job at one of the architectural firms where he had done an internship.

Their daily texts never failed to lift his spirits as he hunted for an apartment and settled into a new routine. He felt very blessed to have Emma in his life again.

*********

Spring semester for Emma was the most busy and demanding of her entire college career. She had more projects, papers and reading to do than in her previous two semesters combined. It didn’t help that getting around was still slow and awkward. If it wasn’t for the daily texts and occasional FaceTime calls from Killian, she didn’t know how she would have made it through. His encouragement lifted her up and calmed her down. He knew just the right things to say to make her laugh when she felt like screaming with frustration. It seemed he could tell how she was feeling just by reading her texts or hearing the tone of her voice.

By mid-April, she had come to two conclusions: she was going to survive the semester from hell, and she was falling hard for her best friend.

*********

Killian rolled his chair away from his desk, stretching his arms above his head. He was thoroughly enjoying the challenge of his job, but being hunched over a computer screen most of the day took its toll.

Pulling out his phone, he saw a message from Liam and grimaced after reading it.

L: We’re trying to get a head count for the wedding reception. Are you bringing a date or not?

He would love to say he was bringing a certain beautiful, blonde-haired lass who was his best friend, and then a sudden thought struck him - what would it hurt to ask? He would pay her airfare and offer her the spare bedroom in his new flat. After the semester she was going through, he felt she deserved some time away. The wedding was two weeks after she finished classes, and he knew she wasn’t planning to start her summer job until the first week of June.

Not wanting to overthink it and talk himself out of it, he pulled up their text thread and typed out a message.

K: Would you consider being my date for my brother’s wedding on May 20? Please?

Glancing at the time, he knew she would be in the middle of her Advanced Composition class and wouldn’t be able to answer for at least another hour. He tried to tamp down the excitement over the prospect of seeing her again, knowing it was a distinct possibility she might say no.

Switching back to Liam’s text, he sent a vague answer.

K: I’ll get back to you on that in a couple of days.

Laying his phone back on the desk, he rose from his chair, grabbed his favorite mug and went to the break room for his afternoon cup of coffee.

*********

Emma sat down at a small table beside the front window of the Student Union and massaged her knee. Even after three months, her injuries still bothered her from time to time, and she still needed physical therapy to strengthen her leg. She took a sip from her Diet Coke and opened a bag of chips, munching on one as she pulled her phone from the pocket of her messenger bag and unlocked it.

When she read the message from Killian, she inhaled sharply. The chip went down sideways and she began coughing, glancing around to make sure no one was rushing over to give her the Heimlich maneuver. She finally caught her breath, tears in her eyes and a sting in her throat from where the chip scraped it.

He was asking her to come to England for his brother’s wedding? As his date?

Did this mean that…could he possibly have feelings for her that went beyond friendship? Or was she reading too much into it? Did he know she thought about him that way? Maybe he just didn’t want to go to the wedding by himself. But if that was the case, wouldn’t he just ask one of his friends who lived in England? Surely any woman he asked would happily jump at the chance to go on a date with such a gorgeous and sweet guy.

She was probably overthinking it. He more than likely just sent her the invitation on the spur of the moment and asked her as his friend, nothing more.

Her initial response was to refuse, as she ran through the excuses in her mind. She was a poor college student and it would be an expensive trip. She needed time to decompress after this semester, before beginning her summer job waitressing, and taking online classes so she could graduate in December. She also promised Mary Margaret to help her with wedding plans.

No matter how many excuses she came up with, another thought overrode them all - she had an opportunity to be with Killian again. How could she say no to that?

Her thumbs hovered over the keyboard as she chewed on her lip. Before sending a reply, she pulled up her banking app and checked her finances. Doing a quick calculation, she realized she could just about afford an airplane ticket and hotel room, but what about meals and transportation?

As if summoned by her deliberation, her phone vibrated with a text from none other than the man whose question was currently making her mind race.

K: I neglected to mention that I will pay for your plane ticket and you’re welcome to stay in my spare bedroom. Never let it be said that Killian Jones is anything less than a gentleman when asking a lady to be his date. I wouldn’t hear of you paying your own way.

Ah, so now that excuse was taken out of the equation. Still, she hesitated. What if she really was reading too much into it? What if his feelings toward her were the same as always, while hers had moved past friendship to… something more… for him? She couldn’t bear to have her heart broken and lose her best friend all in one fell swoop.

She could just go to England, see her friend again, go to the wedding and come back home, never telling him how her feelings had changed. And who knows? Maybe when she saw him again, she would realize her feelings really hadn’t changed, that it was just her mind…and heart… playing tricks on her.

She was definitely overthinking it.

Bringing up the calendar app on her phone, she was surprised to see nothing scheduled for May 20 or any of the days before and after. A smile teased the corners of her lips as that final piece of the puzzle fell into place. Everything was pointing to the idea that she was destined to accept Killian’s invitation.

So she did.

*********

Emma tried to get comfortable in the airplane seat, putting her earbuds in and exhaling a happy sigh. She was very relieved to be finished with the semester that nearly did her in, and even happier that her high GPA was still intact. She reminisced again about how thankful she was for Killian’s support and encouragement throughout the past five months. Now she was just a few hours away from seeing him in person and she could hardly wait.

The last time she was on a plane to England, she was equal parts excited and nervous, and found this time wasn’t any different. She was anxious to see how she reacted to being with Killian again, not really sure if she wanted to confirm that her feelings had deepened.

Trying to put the turmoil of thoughts out of her mind, she tugged a paperback book out of the messenger bag on her lap and started reading.

*********

Killian paced the arrivals area of the airport, checking his phone after every few steps. Emma said she would text him when her plane began disembarking and it was supposed to have landed five minutes ago.

His stomach was in knots, and he couldn’t help but compare it to how he felt when he was planning to go to Vermont. He had been excited to see his friend then, but what he felt now was completely different. He wanted to be more than a friend to Emma and wondered if she reciprocated his feelings.

The phone buzzed in his hand and he sucked in a quick breath. Hopefully before her visit was over, he would find out the answer.

*********

Of course her piece of luggage had to be one of the last to appear on the carousel. When she finally spotted it, Emma impatiently pushed between two people who were texting on their phones instead of watching for their baggage. She snagged her navy blue bag, raised the handle, and turned to exit the area.

Suddenly she heard, “Swan! Over here!” and saw Killian heading her way.

It took them a few moments of dodging people until they were finally hugging each other.

“It’s great to see you again,” she said into his neck, inhaling his unique scent.

They were separated when a man rushing past them bumped his shoulder bag into Emma’s hip, nearly knocking her off her feet, but Killian's strong arms kept her stable. Tossing a brief apology over his shoulder, the man continued on while Killian glared at him.

“Alright there, Swan?” he asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why is it that every time I see you, I’m either almost being knocked on my ass or have injuries from doing just that?”

He laughed, taking the handle of her suitcase from her, while his other hand clasped hers. “I don’t know, but I’m happy to see you walking on your own two feet. Let’s get out of here before that changes.”

Playfully slapping his arm with her free hand, she allowed him to lead her through the throng of people outside to where his car was parked. He stowed her bag in the 'boot' while she circled around to the left side of the car, remembering the passenger seat would be on the opposite side.

As he drove to his apartment, he asked about her flight, and she inquired about the wedding preparations. Their conversation flowed easily, as always, and Emma relaxed more and more as the miles churned away. Her heart was still beating at an accelerated pace, but Killian didn’t seem to notice anything different about her.

But there was something different. Being with him again proved to her that her feelings had gone beyond simple friendship. She was falling in love with her best friend.

*********

It was all Killian could do to keep his focus on the road in front of him. He thought he was prepared to see Emma after five months, hundreds of texts and numerous FaceTime calls, but seeing her beauty in person again was a very pleasant jolt to his system.

When they arrived and he parked his car, he retrieved her luggage and led her inside the building. Upon entering his apartment, she complimented him on the bright, modern space, then followed him down the hallway to the spare room, which was sparsely furnished with a twin bed and small dresser.

“I’m afraid it’s not much,” he apologized, rubbing at a spot behind his ear.

“You forget that I lived in a cramped dorm room for two years,” she laughed. “This is fine. Thank you for providing a place for me to stay and paying for my plane ticket. I probably wouldn’t have been able to come otherwise.”

“My pleasure, Swan. I’m very happy you were able to work it out. Liam and Louise are excited to meet you and to have you join me at the wedding.”

“I look forward to meeting them, too. I’ll finally be able to put faces to their names after hearing so much about them.”

Killian showed her around the rest of his flat, giving her a towel and washcloth when she expressed an interest in taking a shower. While she did, he ordered pizza to be delivered and called Liam to let him know Emma had arrived safely.

After she emerged from the bathroom, hair damp and dressed in casual, comfortable clothes, they ate and caught up with each other some more. He wondered if there would be some awkwardness between them because of the romantic feelings he was developing for her, but was happy to find it was just as easy as always.

*********

Killian took Emma to his brother’s house the next day, where Liam and his fiancée would be attending to last minute details for the wedding. Although she was a little apprehensive to meet Killian’s beloved older brother, Liam set her at ease by greeting her with a broad smile and warm hug.

“Ah, so you’re the famous Emma Swan! My little brother has sung your praises for as long as I can remember. I’ve never seen him happier than when he found you again.”

“You know I’m an adult now, don’t you, Liam?” Killian grumbled. “I’m not your little brother anymore.”

Emma laughed. “I’m very happy we found each other again, too, and to finally meet you, Liam.”

Once Louise arrived, they set to work making small bags of sugar almonds to be placed as favors for the wedding guests. Killian and Liam’s Aunt Aggie stopped in with her homemade Scotch eggs for lunch, greeting Emma just as warmly as Liam and Louise. By the time they left later that afternoon, Emma felt like she had been accepted as an honorary member of the Jones family.

When they got back to Killian’s apartment, Emma unpacked the accessories she brought to wear to the wedding and discovered she forgot to pack her nude heels. He took her shopping to buy a new pair, then they went out to eat at a local pub. Knowing the next day was going to be a busy one with the wedding and reception, they went to bed early; Killian bidding her goodnight with a hug and kiss on the cheek.

Emma lay in bed, recalling the events of the day and wishing she would have acted on her instinct to turn her head into his kiss, so it would have been on the lips instead.

*********

Killian awoke the next morning to a misty, overcast day. He had hoped Liam and Louise would have warm, sunny weather for their special day, but figured since the ceremony wasn’t until late afternoon, there was time for it to clear up.

He went into the kitchen to start the coffee and decided to make English pancakes for breakfast. Just as he was plating up three of the thin, crepe-like treats, Emma came stumbling into the room, yawning and rubbing her eyes.

“Something smells delicious,” she mumbled.

He chuckled. “Are you talking about the coffee or the pancakes?”

“Yes,” she answered with a sly grin.

“Well, help yourself to the coffee. You can have these pancakes as soon as I sprinkle them with powdered sugar. Would you like some strawberries on them, too?”

“Sure,” she said, moving toward the coffee pot.

He set the plate in front of her as soon as she was seated with her mug of coffee. While he was cooking his own pancakes, he heard her moan with pleasure, making him bite his lip to keep from moaning himself. He imagined her making that sound as she was in the throes of passion, and silently admonished himself to get a grip and focus.

When he joined her at the table with his plate, she said, “These are amazing! You’ll have to teach me how to make them sometime.”

He liked how she made it sound like it was inevitable for them to be together again. “I can do that. They’re really quite easy.”

“Maybe for you, but I’m not the greatest in the kitchen,” she commented, before taking another large bite. After chewing and swallowing, she asked, “What’s the schedule for today?”

“We need to be at the church by two o’clock for pictures. The wedding is at three-thirty, with the meal and reception afterwards.”

“I hope what I brought to wear is okay.”

“I’m sure it will be, Swan. There isn’t a specific dress code, except for those of us in the wedding party.”

After they finished eating, they cleaned up the kitchen. “You can take your shower first, Emma. I’m going to call Liam to see if he needs anything,” Killian said, once it was put to rights.

They spent a lazy morning together, watching television and talking. After a light lunch, they maneuvered around each other for the next two hours, getting ready for the big event. As Killian slipped into his white tuxedo shirt, he was happy to notice the sun filtering through the blinds in his room. It looked like Mother Nature was going to cooperate after all.

When he entered the living room, adjusting his cufflinks in the buttonholes, he came to a complete stop. Emma was already there waiting, wearing a knee-length, lace sheath in plum. The dress had a strapless lining, but the lace overlay crossed over one shoulder, giving Killian full view of the other. Her golden hair was swooped back into a low bun, showing off the creamy expanse of her slender neck.

Realizing he was staring, he cleared his throat. “You look…stunning, Swan.”

She self-consciously ran her hands down her sides. “Thank you. My mom bought this dress for me for my induction into an academic sorority last year. I haven’t had an opportunity to wear it again until now. Are you sure it looks alright?”

He took two more steps toward her. “It’s perfect. You’ll be the most beautiful woman there.”

Breathing out a small laugh, she said, “I think that title will belong to Louise, don’t you? All eyes are supposed to be on the bride, after all.” Just as Killian opened his mouth to answer, she added, “Oh, I need to put a few things into my clutch before we go. Give me a couple of minutes.”

“We don’t have to leave for another fifteen, so take your time.” Watching her walk down the short hallway to the bedroom, he couldn’t help thinking that while all eyes were on the bride, he would have a hard time taking his eyes off of Emma.

*********

Emma had made the excuse to leave the room before she began to drool over seeing Killian in a tuxedo. The man was gorgeous to begin with, but put him in a tux and his hotness factor went through the roof.

There was another reason for taking some time to gather herself, though. The adoring way he was looking at her made a thrill of hope run down her spine. Perhaps he did feel something for her besides friendship.

She glanced through the contents of her purse and snapped it shut, determined to tell Killian before she left England how her feelings toward him had changed.

*********

The wedding was beautiful and filled with so much love between the bride and groom, it brought tears to Emma’s eyes. Every time she looked at Killian, he was smiling broadly, clearly happy for his brother. She caught him more than once looking back at her where she sat in the audience beside his Aunt Aggie, and it made the warmth rush into her cheeks.

After enjoying a delicious meal at the reception, they watched Liam and Louise have their first dance together. When the next song began, Killian turned to Emma and held out his hand. “May I have this dance, Swan?”

Placing her hand in his, she commented, “Such a gentleman.”

“If I wasn’t, I would severely disappoint my aunt,” he quipped, winking at the woman herself, who gave him an approving smile.

They moved to the middle of the dance floor, where the newlyweds were continuing to sway, completely oblivious to everyone else around them. Emma put her right hand on his shoulder and felt his arm wrap around her waist, their other hands still clasped together.

Her eyes darted around the room, taking in the other couples on the dance floor and the guests who were standing around the perimeter of it. Then they scanned up to connect with Killian’s, losing herself in their blue depths.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” he asked, the words spoken close to her ear.

“I really am, and I want to thank you, Killian, for asking me to come to the wedding. I’m sure you could have found a cheaper date here, after all!”

“I never even considered asking anyone else.”

“Why not?”

He ducked his head and she was sure he would be scratching behind his ear if both of his hands weren’t occupied. After several moments, he looked back up at her with determination shining in his eyes. “Because no one else is as special and important to me as you, Swan. You…I…” He hesitated and her heart started pounding, wondering what his next words were going to be. “I’ve come to think of you as more than a friend, Emma. My feelings…are changing, becoming…bloody hell, I’m making a right mess of this.”

She exhaled slowly, her hand on his shoulder moving to thread her fingers through the ends of his hair. “I think I know what you’re trying to say, Killian, because…it’s gone beyond friendship for me, too. I…really like you.”

“Truly?” he asked, his eyes hopeful.

“Yeah”, she confirmed.

“So, you’re onboard to see where this goes?”

“I mean, I know it’s not going to be easy because of the distance, but…I think it would be worth a try.”

Before she was finished speaking, his hands were framing her face and he was gazing at her with a warm gleam in his fathomless eyes. Then his lips met hers, soft and sweet, and she knew she made the right decision.

*********

By the time they returned to his flat after the reception, Killian’s feet were sore, but his heart was full. He and Emma danced together for nearly every song. He relished having her in his arms and took the opportunity to kiss her at regular intervals.

After parking the car outside his building, they slowly walked inside, with Emma’s heels dangling from Killian’s fingertips and her arm threaded through his elbow. She had been intuitive enough to know she wouldn’t last the day in her new shoes and tucked a pair of ballet slippers into her clutch.

After he unlocked the door, she entered and flopped down onto the sofa. “Tired, Love?” he asked.

“Yes, but it was so much fun! It’s the best time I’ve ever had at a wedding.”

He sank down beside her. “I had a great time, too. I’m sure it had something to do with the fact it was my brother getting married, but I think it was mostly because of the beautiful lady who was my date.”

She rolled her head sideways to look at him. “I don’t know about you, but I’m relieved to have my feelings for you out in the open.”

“Aye, Love, me too. It makes me very happy you’ve made a place in your heart for me.”

Reaching over to take his hand, she said sincerely, “You’ve always been in my heart, Killian, ever since we were kids. I just hope we can work things out.”

He leaned in to brush a kiss across her lips. “I have confidence we will, Emma.”

She smiled and sighed contentedly. “David and Mary Margaret are getting married next March. Do you think you’ll be able to be my date for their wedding?”

“I’ll be sure to put in for the days off once the new year starts.”

Kissing him again, she said, “Good. You’ll get to meet my mom then.”

“Perhaps I could work something out at Christmas, so I can meet her sooner.”

Emma sighed. “Even Christmas seems very far away. We’re always being separated for months at a time.”

“They do say absence makes the heart grow fonder,” he tried to soothe.

“I hate that saying already,” she growled.

He chuckled, then turned to check the clock on the microwave. “It’s getting rather late, Swan. We should probably go to bed. Would you like to leave early for the airport and stop to get some breakfast on the way?”

“That would be really nice. What time do you think we should leave?”

Looking down at their hands where he was tangling his fingers through hers, he said, “By seven o’clock, I suppose. This time with you has gone far too fast.”

“I know. It always does.” She sighed and squeezed his hand. “I wish this night didn’t have to end, but you’re right - we need to go to bed.”

Rising from the couch, he pulled her to her feet and into a hug. “Goodnight, Swan. Pleasant dreams.”

“Goodnight, Killian,” she mumbled into his shoulder. “See you in the morning.”

He reluctantly released her and watched her walk down the hall, turning at the doorway to give him a smile. Feeling his heart swell, he checked to make sure the door was locked, switched off the lights, and went into his own bedroom, hoping to dream, as he so often had, about his friend across the hall, who was now more than his friend.

*********

The next two months after Emma’s trip to England saw the couple continuing to FaceTime and text, though their conversations were longer and more intimate than before. They seemed to never run out of things to share with each other.

Then one afternoon in early August, an hour before he got off work, he received a text from her.

E: Please call me ASAP.

Emma had been telling him for the past few weeks how concerned she was about her mother. Ruth had developed a persistent cough, was having pain in her chest and didn’t have any energy. David and Emma insisted she see a doctor so she finally gave in and made an appointment. The doctor had ordered more tests, which Killian knew she underwent the previous week. He was instantly concerned and went into the empty break room to place the call.

As soon as he heard Emma’s voice, it felt as though a rock dropped into his stomach. It was anguished in a way he’d never heard before. “Swan, what is it? What’s wrong?” he asked anxiously.

“M-my mom…has…cancer,” she choked out, and he closed his eyes, the memory of that same word impacting his life so brutally when he was a little boy. “It…it’s bad, Killian. Stage four lung cancer, inoperable.” Her voice broke on the final word and he gripped the phone tighter, wishing with all his heart he was there to hold her.

“Emma, I’m so, so sorry. How do they plan to treat it?”

 He could hear her quiet sobs before she spoke again, her voice clogged with tears. “They…they’re trying to…decide what to do, but…M-Mom says she’s not sure she…” Her voice cut off again and he could feel tears trickling down his own cheeks over his girlfriend’s deep sorrow. “She just…wants to l-live long enough to see D-David and Mary Margaret get married.”

Closing his eyes, he asked the next dreaded question. “Have they given her a prognosis?”

He could barely understand her when she answered. “Three to…six m-months. With treatment…maybe a couple more…”

Killian sank into a chair, his legs unable to hold him any longer. “Emma, I…I don’t know what to say. I wish I could be there with you right now.”

She sniffed and whispered, “So do I. I-I’m taking the Fall semester off. David and Mary Margaret are planning to…move their wedding up, probably to late September or early October. Do you…do you think you would still be able to come if they change the date?”

“I promise I’ll be there, Sweetheart. No matter what it takes, I will definitely be there.”

“Thank you, Killian. I…I should let you get back to work. I’m sorry I bothered you.”

“Emma, Love, please don’t apologize,” he said. “I’m here for you whenever you need me - anytime, day or night. Never hesitate to call me, aye?” He heard her exhale a shaky breath, and took it as a sign of relief that she had a source of support.

“Okay,” she said, her voice a bit stronger. “I have to go. David and Mary Margaret are coming over for dinner tonight and I need to help Mom cook.”

“Would it be alright if I call you later this evening?”

“Yeah, that would be great, if you don’t mind.”

“You know I don’t. I’ll talk to you then.”

“Thanks again, Killian. Goodbye.”

“Goodbye, Swan.”

He hung up and sunk his head into his hands. He and Emma had spoken numerous times about how many things they had in common. He really hoped both of their mothers succumbing to cancer wouldn’t be added to that list.

*********

Killian exited the airport, his eyes anxiously searching for his girlfriend. When he didn’t see her immediately, he began walking down the sidewalk in search of the yellow VW from the picture she sent to him.

“Hey, handsome.”

He turned quickly to see Emma standing behind him. Dropping his duffle to the ground, he wrapped her tightly in his embrace. For almost two months, he had longed to hold her, giving her some small degree of comfort for her pain.

“Sorry. I had trouble finding a parking space,” she explained, her voice muffled by his chest.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve only been out here a few minutes.” Pulling back to look into her face, he asked, “How are you doing, Love?”

“I’m, uh, okay, I guess,” she said, not meeting his eyes. “Are you ready to go?”

“Aye.” He slung the strap of his duffle bag over his shoulder, then clasped her hand in his. “Lead on, Milady.”

On the drive to Storybrooke, she filled him in on the plans for the wedding, which would be taking place in two day’s time.

“David is staying at the house until after the wedding, and the house has become ‘wedding central’. I’m pretty sure Mary Margaret is trying to keep all of us busy, so we have less time to think about…Mom.” She paused, swallowing hard before continuing. “Unfortunately, even though David has twin beds in his room, the extra bed is completely covered with silk flower arrangements, and Mom sleeps in the living room when she can’t get comfortable in her bed, so you’ll have to…share a bed with me.”

“Is that alright with you?”

She hummed and nodded. “To be honest, I think Mary Margaret arranged it that way on purpose. I haven’t been sleeping very well, and she probably thinks being with you will help.”

He placed his hand over hers where it rested on the gear shift. “I hope it will.”

Briefly turning her head to look at him, she smiled weakly. “Mom is feeling pretty good today. She’s excited to meet you.”

Ruth had started chemo treatments two weeks after her diagnosis, but they made her very sick and lethargic. The doctors hadn’t been optimistic about the effectiveness of the treatments anyway, so after lengthy discussions with her children, she decided to discontinue them. She was still having more good days than bad, and everyone was hopeful the day of the wedding would be one of her ‘good days’.

Killian could tell by the set of Emma’s shoulders and the tension in her voice that she was carrying a heavy burden of emotions. He was already dreading leaving her on Monday. His supervisor, a kind older man named Marco, had been generous in giving him four days off after working there for less than a year, but he had to report to the office on Tuesday or have his pay docked.

When they pulled up in front of a two-story white colonial, Emma cut the engine and looked over at him. “Well, this is home.”

He gave the house and huge yard surrounding it an appraising look, before turning back to her to say, “It looks warm and welcoming. I’m glad you had such a wonderful place to grow up, Love.”

“Yeah, it was great. David and I spent a lot of time outside. Over there,” she said, pointing to a spot at the back of the yard, “is our garden. I thought it was magical being able to grow our own food. Nothing is better than sweet corn fresh from the garden.”

“After everything you’ve told me about your home, it’s nice to see it in person.”

Emma unbuckled her seat belt and opened her door, while Killian did the same. He retrieved his bag from the back seat, then walked hand-in-hand with her up the sidewalk and porch steps.

“We’re here,” she called out, leading him through the front door. He barely had a chance to take a look around the living room before Mary Margaret emerged from the room to their left.

“Hi, Killian,” she said, initiating a hug with him. “We’re so happy you’re here.”

“I’m very happy to be here,” he replied.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw another figure enter the room and heard Emma say, “This is my mom, Ruth.”

Mary Margaret stepped aside to let him approach their matriarch. She looked wan and weak but gave him a warm smile. “Welcome to our home, Killian.”

He wasn’t quite sure how to greet her, so he offered her his hand as he expressed his gratitude for opening her home to him.

She ignored his offer of a handshake, placing her hands on both sides of his face instead. “My Emma has told me so much about you. How wonderful that the two of you were reunited after so many years apart!”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Nolan,” he smiled.

Patting his cheeks, she said, “Please call me Ruth. Now, we thought you would be hungry when you got here, so we’ve prepared a late lunch. Come eat with us.”

Upon entering the kitchen, he greeted David, who was putting filled water glasses on the table. The five of them ate and chatted for twenty minutes before Emma looked at her mother and said, “You look tired, Mom. Why don’t you go lay down and we’ll clean up?”

Ruth nodded wearily and pushed herself up to her feet. “I think I’ll do that. Please wake me in time to help cook dinner, will you?”

They agreed and watched her shuffle out of the room. Mary Margaret broke the silence by speaking in an overly cheery voice, “Killian, I hope you don’t mind, but you’ll have to stay in Emma’s room while you’re here.”

“She already told me and that’s fine with me, as long as David approves,” Killian said with a smirk.

David fixed him with a scowl. “My bedroom is on the other side of the wall, so I better not hear anything that will force me to come over there and defend my sister’s honor.”

All of them shared a laugh before Emma offered to show him to her room. Grabbing his duffle bag out of the living room, he followed her up the stairs.

Ushering him in the door, she said, “It hasn’t changed much since I was a teenager. I asked my dad to paint it yellow a couple of years after I moved in.”

He looked around to take in the pale yellow walls, dotted with posters of music groups and TV shows, and furniture consisting of a double bed, nightstand, dresser, and desk. Dropping his bag on the floor at the foot of the bed, he turned and pulled her into his arms. “Alright there, Swan?”

She nodded into his neck, tightening her grip around his waist. “She’s getting weaker every day. She tries to put up a good front, but we can see it. I…I don’t want to lose her, Killian.”

“I know, Love. I’m so sorry. What can I do to help?”

“Just hold me,” she whispered.

It was the easiest thing he had ever done.

*********

The evening ended up being very pleasant. They enjoyed one of Ruth’s signature dishes of chicken and dumplings, prepared by Emma and Mary Margaret with Ruth’s guidance. Later, they taught Killian how to play the card game ‘Hearts’. He caught onto it so quickly, he ended up winning the last game and David teasingly accused him of cheating.

Ruth tired easily, due to frequent bouts of coughing, but she insisted on staying up until David left to take Mary Margaret home.

Once they were alone, Emma and Killian remained in the living room, enjoying the quiet stillness, while cuddling on the couch. She concentrated on tangling and untangling her fingers with his, her head resting on his shoulder.

After several peaceful moments, she spoke softly, “Killian?”

“Hmm?” he hummed, pressing his lips to her hair.

“I’ve been…waiting to tell you something until I could do it in person.” Leaning back, she looked into his face.

“What’s that, Sweetheart?” he asked, his eyes searching hers.

“You’ve always had a special place in my heart and now that we’ve found each other again, you’ve become very important to me. Even though it’s only been a few months since you came back into my life, I can’t imagine not having you in it.”

When she paused, he assured her, “I feel the same way, Emma.”

She smiled at him before continuing. “What I’m trying to say is…I…I’ve fallen in love with you, Killian.”

His hands came up to cradle her face, with so much joy radiating in his smile. “That’s wonderful to hear, because I’m in love with you, too.”

“You are?” she asked, though she could see the confirmation in his eyes.

“Aye, and I didn’t want to tell you over the phone, either. I wanted to say it while I was holding you in my arms.”

Dipping his head, he brushed his lips against hers twice before deepening the kiss, the gentle pressure of his lips making her melt. His exploring tongue traced the seam of her lips and she welcomed him without hesitation.

The kiss was slow, sweet and undemanding, expressing their love, but not growing heated. They both knew this was not the time or place to take the next big step in their relationship.

Resting his forehead against hers after the kiss, he murmured, “My heart is yours, Emma.”

“I’ll take very good care of it, Killian. I promise.”

*********

Thanks so much for reading, liking, reblogging and commenting, if you’re so inclined. Chapter 3 is on its way to being written, but I can’t state a time frame for when it will be posted yet. 

Tagging: @xsajx @hookedmom @kymbersmith-90 @kmomof4 @lassluna @pirateherokillian @teamhook @stahlop @elizabeethan @whimsicallyenchantedrose @resident-of-storybrooke @therooksshiningknight @jennjenn615 @lfh1226-linda @ilovemesomekillianjones @killianswannn @stories-enchanted @eleveneitherway @withheartfulloflove @kday426 @djlbg @kristi555 @laschatzi @xarandomdreamx @wyntereyez @goforlaunchcee @yasbio2015 @tiganasummertree @winterbaby89 @wefoundloveunderthelight @hollyethecurious @let-it-raines @jonesfandomfanatic @searchingwardrobes @oncechicagolove @andiirivera  @gingerchangeling @everything-person @klynn-stormz @qualitycoffeethings @enchanted-swans @ohmakemeahercules @donteattheappleshook @bluewildcatfanatic @the-darkdragonfly @demisexualemmaswan @grimmswan @spartanguard @flslp87 @ultraluckycatnd @thisonesatellite @captainswan21 @zaharadessert @mariakov81 @snowbellewells @kiwistreetswan @batana54 @nadine200179 @probalicious17 @courtorderedcake @julesep3026 @jackieorioncat @whatthehell102082 @jarienn972 @sthonour @linda8084  @pirateprincesslena @daxx04 @artistic-writer @cocohook38 @captainswan4life85 @molly958 @itsfridaysomewhere @fallingforthecaptain  @onceratheart18 @strangestarlighttree @justanother-unluckysoul @mrs-potato-but-likes-tomato @anothersworld @deckerstarblanche @purplehawkcaptain  @superchocovian @k-leemac @citygirlscowboy @laughterandbooks @sotangledupinit @apiratewhopines @huntressandlioness1 @gingerpolyglot @motherkatereloyshipper @cs-rylie @anmylica @paradiselady19 @pawshapedheart @vampcoffeegyrl23 @elfiola @softkilly @nachocheese-itsmycheese @iverna​ @booksteaandtoomuchtv​

[herofics]

I thought of another one. Izuku, Ejiro, and Mirio (seperatly) with an s/o who they know has depression. When they are called on some task that would last for the day or more, s/o is pushed to far down by their thoughts. S/o overdoses, fear, pain, everything, thinking they would finally die. When the boys come back they see s/o on ground with pills everywhere, s/o slowly starts coming to, and the boys realize, they weren't there. They could've lost s/o. They got so scared.

I didn’t do Mirio this time because I wanted to get the post out, but I’ll try to remember to write this for him some other time. I have some other scenarios on a similar situation for Dabi and Todoroki. This has happened to me a couple of times. I had just taken way too many meds and my dad barely got me to talk in the morning when he tried to wake me up, so this is very much based on my own experience. No one should ever overdose on purpose and I’m not glorifying it in any way and if it happens, always get them to a hospital/ER. I guess this is again in their twenties and living together. I would also like to mention that while some mentally ill people might need a lot of help in everyday life, I don’t mean this to come off like we all need a babysitter all the time, or we’ll do something stupid. Decided to put this under the keep reading thing, because they’re so long

~Midoriya Izuku~

Being the number one hero wasn’t easy, but Midoriya had always found it to be very fulfilling work, even if it sometimes kept him away from home for days. He knew you were always waiting for him and that he always had you to come back to. He wasn’t going to make it home tonight, so he decided to give you a call.

“Hey” you answered as you picked up the phone.

“Hey, I just wanted to check in, let you know I’m still alive an all” he said.

“Good to know, are you gonna be home tonight?”

“Sorry, but no, I can’t make it until maybe early tomorrow morning. Are you doing okay? You sound a bit off”

“I’m fine, I promise” you tried to reassure him.

“Good, I have to go now” Midoriya said, and took the phone off ihs ear.

“I lo-” you said into the phone, but the line disconnected before you could finish your sentence.

That’s how you had been feeling lately too, disconnected. Disconnected from everything, especially from Izuku. He had been working so hard lately, trying to keep the peace, making the world a better place, the things he’d always wanted to do. You just felt like you’d been left behind, Izuku was fulfilling all his dreams and ambitions and you felt like you were doing nothing, like you had achieved nothing

You didn’t want to live like that, you didn’t want to live doing nothing, achieving nothing. You didn’t want to feel useless, you didn’t want to be useless. So you decided you wouldn’t be anything.

You set down the phone and looked at the sight in front of you. You had three bottles of different medications on the edge of the sink. You filled your glass with water and downed the first handful, and then a second one, and then a third one. You leaned against the sink and looked in the mirror. Your vision was going blurry and your hand slipped off the edge of the sink, hitting the glass that still had a little water in it. It dropped on the tile floor of the bathroom and shattered.

You staggered backwards and slid down to the floor, leaning your back against the wall. You hadn’t even noticed you were crying when you looked in the mirror, but you could feel the tears streaming down your cheeks. You hit the floor next to you, and your fist made contact with one of the shards from the broken glass. You didn’t care about the pain, you just kept hitting the floor.

At some point you passed out. You weren’t really sure when it happened, since you just kind of drifted off gradually. you didn’t know how much time had passed when you awoke to someone shaking you. Well you weren’t fully awake, more like barely conscious.

Midoriya had come home to find you slumped against the wall next to the bathroom door, with your hand bloody and you not responding to his pleas to wake up.

“Oh god, nononononono” he muttered before he checked for your pulse. It was there, a bit weak but there. “Thank goodness” he sighed.

Midoriya called an ambulance and you were transported to the hospital. He was sitting in the back of the ambulance with you, holding your hand while you drifted in and out of consciousness.

You remembered Izuku picking you up and carrying you outside. It was a bit chilly, but his warm arms were wrapped around you. He laid you down somewhere, probably an ambulance since you could hear a siren. You passed out again a little bit after the ambulance stopped.

You were taken away by the nurses and Midoriya was left just standing on the hallway, totally lost for what he should do.

“Sir, you can follow me to the waiting area” a nurse said, and he did as he was told.

Midoriya sat down in the waiting room, and he waited, and waited, and waited. After some hours a nurse came to tell him that you had had to have your stomach pumped, but you were going to be okay. The amount of pills you had taken wasn’t lethal, but it was still dangerous. You were wheeled into one of the patient rooms and Midoriya pulled a chair next to your bed and once again he waited.

When you woke up, you were in bed. For a moment you thought you were sleeping at home so you instinctively reached for Izuku who usually slept on your right side, but there was no one there, just the edge of the bed.

“(Name), are you awake?” you heard Izuku ask from the other side of you.

“Mmmmhhmm” you mumbled in the affirmative and sat up stretching your arms towards the ceiling.

The motion made your hand hurt, so you checked why. Your hand was wrapped in bandages, and the side opposite to your thumb hurt the most.

“They had to give you some stitches, your hand was a bloody mess when I found you” Midoriya said quietly.

You finally looked at him. He had been crying, his eyes were puffy and his cheeks red.

“I’m sorry” you whispered.

“Do you remember what happened?” he asked, with a serious tone, ignoring your apology.

“Not much, I know I took some pills, but I don’t know how much, or how I hurt my hand, let alone how much time has passed between then and now”

“The assumption is you took them last night, I found you early in the morning, and you were brought here. So it’s probably been almost 24 hours”

“I was out for quite a while then, huh” you said.

“Yeah” Midoriya said and leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms in front of himself 

“You’re disappointed with me, aren’t you?” you had to force yourself to ask.

“No, I’m just really worried” he sighed.

“I think… we should break up” you said.

You didn’t actually want to break up with him, but you couldn’t bear to see him in so much pain because of something you did.

“What are you talking about?”

“I don’t want you to have to deal with this, you don’t deserve it” you sniffled.

Midoriya wasn’t sure if he could get you to change your mind. He knew you were the kind of person that didn’t want to hurt anyone, especially him, but this suggestion was just plain stupid.

“Do you really think that I’m the kind of person who would just leave you alone with this?”

“I know you’re not, but-”

“No buts, you’re not getting rid of me that easily”

“I don’t want to be a cause of pain for you, Izuku. I don’t want you to cry because of me or sit in the hospital because I couldn’t deal and did something to hurt myself”

“Hey” he grabbed your hand. “I’m in this for all of it, all of you. It doesn’t matter what we’ll have to go through, we’ll survive it together”

“I love you so much” you started sobbing and squeezed his hand.

“It’s gonna be okay” Midoriya said and kissed you on the forehead.

~Kirishima Eijirou~

You didn’t know what came over you again. It wasn’t like things had been going too well for you lately, but suddenly it seemed to increase tenfold. You felt so incredibly overwhelmed and exhausted. You had barely slept at all during the last week, and had called sick into work. They would probably fire you soon, but at that moment, you couldn’t care less.

You walked into the bedroom, and sat on your side of the bed. You opened the top drawer in your nightstand. There they were, all your medications in their little bottles and boxes. You took out the two strongest ones and set the bottles on the nightstand. You just looked at them for a while, not touching them, but you knew what you were going to do, what you very strongly felt like you had to do.

You took the first bottle and screwed off the child safety cap. You moved closer to the middle of the bed and poured the contents of the bottle in front of you on the bed. You reached for the other bottle and almost dropped it, but managed to keep your grip. You opened that one too and poured it next to the other pile of pills.

The medications were a bit different in color but almost identical in shape. Again you paused to just look at them and take in what you had decided to do. You just sat there on the bed for like ten minutes, before you scooped up the first handful of pills. You grabbed your water bottle from the nightstand and downed the pills with no hesitation. You couldn’t swallow them all at once so there was a bitter taste in your mouth, before you took another mouthful of water.

When you had downed what was probably half of the amount of pills you had poured on the bed, you started to feel woozy and weak. You accidentally dropped the water bottle onto the floor, but you couldn’t be bothered to pick it up. It didn’t matter anymore, nothing did, everything was about to be gone for you.

Kirishima had been away for the last day. He had been doing a big sting on a gang of villains with some other pro heroes, and the whole thing had stretched way longer than he thought. He had to debrief with the police afterwards of course and give a status report at the agency he was working at. So when he finally got home, it was early the next morning.

He snuck into the apartment quietly, figuring you were still asleep. Kirishima decided to take a look in the bedroom, but you didn’t seem to be in bed. He was a bit confused now, where were you if not still in bed?

Kirishima was about to leave the room when he noticed something weird on the bed. Something white and round, multiple of those actually. He rounded the bed, and found you laying on the floor next to the bed.

“(Name)?” he whispered as he hurried to you.

You weren’t moving. He took you into his arms and sat down on the bed. Maybe you had just hit your head when falling off the bed, maybe the pills had nothing to do with this.

“(Name)?” he said louder this time.

It was like you were underwater. You heard someone calling your name, but it sounded like it was coming from very far away, too far away. Why couldn’t you just sink in peace? Why couldn’t whoever it was just let you drift deeper?

Kirishima knew you hated hospitals, but he didn’t see any other choice than calling an ambulance. He hated feeling so useless.

“Hang in there, okay (Name)? I’m getting you help” he said, tearing up.

Suddenly you didn’t feel like you were underwater anymore. You heard Eijirou’s voice and your eyes fluttered open.

“(Name)!”

You reached your hand to touch his cheek, but you didn’t have the strength to lift your arm all the way. Kirishima grabbed your hand and placed it on his cheek, holding it there and placing a kiss on your palm.

“Hey beautiful” he said with a smile, tears streaming down his face. “I was so scared for you”

“Eiji” you said weakly.

“I know you don’t want to, but I should really get you to a hospital” he said.

“No” you argued.

“You’re in a bad way and you need help”

“I’m fine” you muttered.

You couldn’t really get your thoughts together. It was like you couldn’t grab onto them and make them stick together. You just knew the last thing you wanted to do was to go to the hospital. You’d been through this before, last time you had been alone but you had been through this. With the amount of pills you had managed to take you weren’t in a life threatening situation, but you were sure to be pretty out of it for quite a while

“You’re not fine babe” he wiped his cheeks dry with his sleeve.

“No hopstial” you mumbled.

Kirishima didn’t really know what to do. He wanted to respect your wishes, but he also wanted to make sure you were okay. It might have been unwise but he decided not to take you to the hospital after all. He was terrified of what could’ve happened to you, of what you could’ve done to yourself, and quite honestly he wasn’t entirely sure how he could help you, but he would try his best.

[link4eva]

Kiro’s Seeking Date Translation [CN]

Hey, everyone! Just a couple of things before you begin reading. I don’t actually know any Chinese so this translation was done through the power of Google Translate. A HUGE shout-out to @keliosyfan and @cheesy09 for helping me with edits and revising. Thank you!!! 💛

Here’s a link to the date video uploaded by @keliosyfan​ that you can follow along with.

 Also, here’s a link to the call that comes before the date.

*TW: I feel like I should note that this date has mentions of human trafficking.*

This translation contains spoilers for a date that has not yet been released to the ENG server. If you wish to not be spoiled, please don’t look below the cut. 

Hope you enjoy~ 💛

*Spoilers for future content below!*

[First Part]

??: What are you doing kidnapping her, idiot?! 

??: She has been with Helios for so many years, she must be his most important woman.

??: With this woman, we can make him write off his debts and also crush his spirit as a gift to those foreigners.

In the dimness, two male voices drifted into my ears.

My hands were tied behind me, and the rope bore through the cloth on my body. The rough and wet touch made me very uncomfortable.

??: If he really cared about this woman, would he always keep her by his side? Tell everyone that she is his weakness?

??: This woman is a target he bought four years ago to get rid of trash and see who in the city found him unpleasant!

Although I was very certain that these people were telling the truth, after hearing those words, my heart still couldn’t help but ache.

??: This is the end of the matter. This woman can’t stay.

??: Sooner or later, that beast Helios will know what you have done. He would never let us get away with it. *Changed some wording*

??: This person has just been taken away, and Helios won’t be so fast.

The icy sound of a knife unsheathing made me clench my teeth. My whole body shook.

The hemp rope had been cut with the blade hidden in my sleeve, and I waited for the opportunity as it gradually approached.

Even though I closed my eyes, I could always see that person’s face and a pair of indifferent blue eyes.

If I died, would he be sad? 

??: Hope... is the most precious thing in this world. 

??: Do you want to go with me?

I can’t die yet.

But just before I acted, someone ended up being faster than me.

With a “shink”, it seemed that a sharp weapon pierced the glass and embedded itself into the wooden board. The sudden noise made my heart constrict.

??: Don’t open your eyes.

After an extremely cold and commanding voice sounded, there were shrill screams. In the continuous plethora of sounds, there was the harsh sound of bones being twisted.

I closed my eyes and curled up tightly, worried that this was just a dream.

Until I was hugged in a strong and warm embrace, with the fragrance of smokey tobacco wrapping around me. 

I opened my eyes blankly and caught sight of the silver hair that was eye-catching and dazzling in the gloomy thatched house.

Those blue eyes, which were normally calm, were now mixed with a little anger.

MC: ...Am I dreaming?

Helios: Do you often dream of me? 

The man gave me a look, held me, and walked out the door. It seemed to be the warehouse of a wine shop.

(Cut to outside)

Suddenly his figure stopped, and I lowered my eyes to find that a man was holding onto his trousers tightly.

??: Mr. Helios, boss, please forgive us this time. We will soon have a big deal, and then we will be accommodated…. 

Helios: Is the restaurant I run like an orphanage?  

Helios: Repaying debts is justified.

He turned a deaf ear to the man’s pleading and the whispers from the bystanders. He moved his long legs, and the man fell to the ground.

At the same time, a group of people began to move in and out of the store.

MC: Should I first….

Helios: Don’t move. 

His voice sounded impatient. I blinked and didn’t speak anymore.

After the fight was over, Helios raised the corner of his mouth and gave a slight retort to the kneeling man.

Helios: Mr. Cao, you’re welcome to visit Spring Moon Pavillion next time. 

??: You foreign devil, don’t lie! Go to hell! 

The curse echoed behind us, and the sound of a solid, steady heartbeat fell upon my ears.

Here, people called him many things-- Mr. Helios, the boss, foreign devil. 

No one knew his origins. There was a rumour that seemed to say he was of mixed race.

Most of the restaurants, diners and pawn shops in the city were under his name, and there were many other shady places.

Countless people ate his meals, and countless people enjoyed his turf. They were his business partners, his subordinates, and his debtors.

He was the unspoken ruler of this city.

Everyone here respected him and feared him.

MC: Are you hurt?

I felt the person stepping forward seem to pause, but it was only momentarily.

Helios: No. 

I leaned into that somewhat cold embrace, and in my sorrow, it seemed to overlap with the heavy snow from four years ago.

[Second Part]

(Flashback)

I stretched my arms strenuously, trying to grab the flying photograph.

The man behind me tightened the chain on the back of my neck, leaving only the muddy photo in my blurred vision, which ended up crushed with shoe prints on the ground.

Like unforeseen freedom, it broke free, but also decayed. Like my freedom, slowly slipping away with each step.

The world was covered with a film and the insults behind me were drowned out, and only cold white noise remained.

Suddenly, a pair of delicate leather shoes stopped next to the photo, and someone picked it up in the next second.

I blinked slowly, and found an eye-catching and sharp silver light under the extremely gloomy sky.

It was like the first speck of snow that one would find stunning in the late winter, burning straight into people’s eyes, beautiful and cold.

The boy looked around the same age as me, and a pair of azure blue eyes met my own.

The biting cold caused my reaction to delay and another pair of distant and similar pupils appeared before my eyes.

But they were warmer and brighter.

??: Snap out of it!

When my consciousness was pulled back to reality by the pain, I heard screams that did not belong to me. The force that restrained me suddenly disappeared, and I fell directly to the ground.

I reluctantly raised my eyes and found that the silver-haired boy had come over at some point, twisting the man’s wrist with one hand. His gaze shifted from the photo in his hand to me.

??: Did you stay in the orphanage in the east of the city as a child? 

I looked at him dumbfoundedly and lost my voice for a moment.

??: Answer me.

MC: [flustered] ….Ye-yes! I stayed there for a year.

The boy’s eyes seemed to light up for a moment because of my answer, and then became alienated in the blink of an eye.

He threw the man aside, lowered his eyes and wiped off the mud from the photo with his white sleeves, then squatted down and handed it to me.

??: I’ll only ask once.

??: Come with me?

I stared at him in a daze, and the roaring from the outside world came to an abrupt end. Only the voice of the boy in front of me and my own heartbeat could be heard.

MC: Ok.

As soon as I spoke, the boy threw a few silver bills at the man.

The heavy snow fell silently, and I was taken into his arms, like a fragmented snowflake.

The blood, water and frost all mixed together, and I heard his voice in the dizziness.

??: Starting today, you are mine. 

??: My name is Helios.

??: But I don’t like this name, so don’t call me that.

MC: My name is MC….Then um….what should I call you?

His attitude left me a little perplexed.

Helios: If you have something to say, I will acknowledge it.

Helios: Is that photo important?

In the heavy snow on the quiet road, I lifted my head laboriously, trying to muster a smile.

MC: [smiling affectionately] Very important. He was my best friend in the orphanage and a big star in the city.

MC: Everyone loved to hear him sing. He never cared about who his audience was; he shined nonetheless. 

MC: It’s just… He went abroad six months ago, so he must be an even better person now.

The boy’s footsteps froze for a moment as if his feet were bound in ice and snow.

Helios: He’s just an actor. 

Helios: A useless profession.

MC: But….it was his smile that gave me strength.

Without him, I would not have been able to hold on till the day I met you.

(End of flashback)

I opened my eyes and turned my head to see Helios sitting on the sofa, casually reading the newspaper. As usual, he should be in the restaurant at this time.

Looking at his profile, the dream I had just now made me a little confused.

It turned out that I had stayed by his side for so long.

He took me back to the small restaurant, healed my injuries and taught me all kinds of things.

Literacy, singing, dancing, medical skills, business….

He was the most ruthless and sharp blade. I had witnessed how he, with his own power, had expanded this small restaurant to its current size in just a few years.

Helios: Get up and eat if you’re awake. 

The sudden words interrupted my thoughts. Helios didn’t look up as he slowly took a sip of tea from his teacup. Seeing him frown, I immediately got up from the bed.

The food had been arranged on the wooden table, the temperature just right; neither too hot nor too cold--

Obviously, the people who prepared this had carefully taken time into consideration.

I looked at the man sitting aside from the sidelines and saw the teacup he put aside. I was a little puzzled.

MC: Is that pot of tea not brewed?

Helios: It’s poisoned. 

Helios: Tastes terrible. 

I almost choked on the spring rolls in my mouth and sighed inwardly at his calm demeanour.

I went up to the cabinet, skillfully took out the bottle of medicine and poured out a pill. I walked up to him and handed it over.

Helios: I won’t die.

After hearing the expected answer, I picked up the pill and brought it to his mouth.

He didn’t open his mouth but stared at me coldly.

MC: You don’t need to stare at me. I’m not afraid of you.

With that said, I continued to pry open his mouth with the pill.

Probably moved by my fearlessness, his mouth finally opened slowly and swallowed the pill.

I smiled with satisfaction and when I turned around to continue enjoying my spring rolls, a pair of cool palms swept over my waist.

The incense stick burned quietly, and a small sigh and familiar body temperature covered me closely from behind.

Helios: Don’t you blame me for using you as bait? 

He closed his eyes. His long eyelashes were covered with sunlight and his brows were furrowed.

MC: You taught me that there is no meaningless business in this world.

MC: You bought me. My life is yours.

Helios: That’s the spirit. 

The person behind slowly opened his eyes, his pupils full of jest and scrutiny.

MC: Today I just wanted to go to the temple to ask for a peace charm like in previous years. 

MC: I was going to go there by myself, but I didn’t want to cause you trouble.

He probably didn’t believe me. Even so, I explained it word by word.

A cool finger stroked my neck and entangled a few strands of my hair.

Helios: How many years have you been with me?

His sudden question had me stunned for a moment.

MC: ….Three years and two hundred and seventy-five days.

Helios: It’s three years and two hundred and seventy-six days.* 

*This is a little Easter egg that @keliosyfan spotted.  “When Helios asked MC how long she has been with him, she says "3 years, 275 days" but he corrects her saying "3 years, 276 days". If you put the numbers together you get 3276 which in CN numeric slang means "love Qiluo(Kiro) for life" or "生爱棋洛"So in a way, he wants MC to say "I love Kiro for life"(3276/生爱棋洛). 🥺😭🤧”

Although his voice was faint, it was conclusive.

I thought about it and didn’t argue with him. For me, there was no difference between one more day and one less day.

Helios: Want to leave?

MC: ….?

He laughed suddenly, but only slightly mocking this time.

Helios: I can teach you enough to live a better life.

After that, he stood up. The sudden drop in temperature made me feel a little cold in this midsummer weather.

Helios: Since you want to leave, I won’t stop you.

Helios: But leave before the seventh day of July. 

[Third Part]

Helios left after saying this, leaving me alone in the room in a daze. 

Compared to his sudden expulsion, I was more concerned about another thing.

The seventh day of July.

What was going to happen on that day?

The annexed restaurants, and suppressed merchants….I know what Helios has been doing for several years.

Would my existence cause him any trouble?

I looked at my bare wrists and couldn’t help laughing at myself.

Maybe I was locked in place by a pair of invisible shackles.

I pursed my lips and walked to the closet to take out the bag hidden in its depths. Perhaps it was just my illusion, but it seemed to have been turned over by someone.

(Outside of room)

Outside the dark room, late at night, I tiptoed over with my bag. There were faint sounds of firm punching and kicking coming from inside the room. 

Helios stayed alone here every night, not letting anyone come close.

But this was my hidden secret, and I could secretly monopolize Helios at this moment.

As usual, I opened the window a crack.

In the room, Helios was half-naked, and the small old silver locket hung with silver bells, reflecting sharp lines of bright silver light in the cold moonlight.

His movements were swift and fierce, harder than usual as if he was venting out something.

His wet hair was weighed down, and sweat dripped slowly from his lower jaw and down his strong and undulating chest.

He stood at the junction of light and shadow, with most of his face hidden in the darkness.

The sound of cicadas in midsummer made people feel a little restless, and the silver locket on his chest heaved slightly as he panted hard.

Helios stood there and didn’t move. I don’t know what he was waiting for. *The music from the first Valentine’s Day event starts playing so it’s getting steamy 😏*

In the next second, those blue eyes passed through the window and were firmly locked on me.

MC: ….!

I instantly withdrew my head and squatted down.

Helios: ….Come in. 

Helios: I’ll only say it once. *Don’t need to tell me twice!! 😩😩 *

Hearing the slightly stiff tone, I stood up, lowered my head, and pushed the door open. I only took a single step in and then stopped.

Helios: I don’t see you this compliant on weekdays.

MC: ….You knew?! Then why did you never let me go before….

Helios: For my own pleasure. 

I suddenly raised my head and found that he had positioned himself right in front of me. His scorching body temperature seemed to be able to cross the distance between us and set me on fire.

MC: I-I didn’t come here today to take a peek, I just….

He lowered his eyes and his gaze flicked across the bag I was holding behind me. His smile melted into a bit of a smirk.

Helios: If you’re saying goodbye, you don’t...

MC: I want you to teach me some martial arts.

I held my breath and did not miss the momentary surprise that flashed through his eyes.

MC: What you taught me isn’t enough.

Helios looked at me condescendingly, his eyes dim. A breeze flitted past my ear as his hand smacked against the door frame behind me.

Helios: Not enough? 

In this tense atmosphere, I tried my best not to avoid his gaze.

MC: You taught me a lot, but….it felt like things had become even serious today.

MC: So I…. I still need you.

Before I finished speaking, Helios suddenly grabbed my left wrist from the outside and at the same time stretched out his leg to hook behind me. 

When I lost my balance, his left hand instantly reached out to support my waist, and his right hand came out from under my arm and clasped my wrist from the front again.

When I came back to my senses, I found that I had been directly pinned to the floor, and the bag in my hands had been tossed aside.

The entire movement was executed clean and smooth, and there was only the faint sound of the silver bell on the old silver locket swaying in the silent air.

Helios: There are many people who need me in this city. 

Helios: I can teach you. Want to learn?

He lowered his head slightly, and the old silver locket grazed my chest, which made me take in a sharp inhale. My entire heart and lungs seemed to be occupied by his breath.

I tried to lift up my wrists and lower limbs, but it wasn’t enough to shake off the person above me.

MC: In this bag is the money that I have saved over the past few years. The money you bought me for back then, plus four years’ worth of interest, will be given to you.

Helios: I’m not short on cash.

MC: If you accept the money, I won’t owe you anything, but I will still help you.

I tremblingly stroked the old silver locket on his chest. It carried his body temperature and made my fingertips hot.

It coincided with the seventh day of the seventh month of the first year we met. For the first time, I heard someone cursing him and wanting him to die.

I had cried and went to the temple to ask for a peace charm and an old silver locket. When I got home, I gave them to him together.

I knew that many people in this city hated him, but I wanted him to be safe.

He had just smiled sarcastically at the time, and I threw it away when he turned around. Who knew that I’d see it dangling on his chest here that night.

The silver bells chimed, just like my unstoppable heartbeat. 

MC: You still wear this old silver locket.

Helios: I forgot to remove it.

His hot breath fanned my face, entangling with my own breath in the scorching air.

My fingers followed the silver chain of the old silver locket and stroked his chest. I could clearly feel his taut muscles under my fingertips.

MC: There are many orphans like me in the restaurant.

MC: Those merchants who were suppressed by you could always open new shops.

MC: Underground, the losers will always be the bureaucrats who usually bully others and gain funds out of ill will. 

MC: I don’t know why you want to be a bad person in the eyes of the city, but what I see is different from others.

Helios: Ridiculous.

MC: This is what you taught me.

Looking at my smile, he snorted coldly, but the moonlight sneaking in illuminated the faint smile in his eyes.

Helios: You just said it wrong. 

He glanced at my bag and lowered his body even further.

Helios: Don’t owe me anything?

Helios: The three years and two hundred and seventy-six days with me were enough for you to repay me?

MC: [confused] You didn’t even see how much there is inside…. 

Helios: I’ve seen it.

He pulled slightly hard, making me stand up instantly.

Helios: You owe me too much. 

Helios: I’ll ask you to settle the tab later.

Helios: However, you do need to learn some self-defence skills.

Unlike his usual touch, his fingertips caressed my eyes, ears, nose and neck.

Helios: People have many weaknesses.

Helios: Eyes, ears, throat, heart…. *The way he said this sent shivers down my spine 😳🥵*  

As he whispered, his fingertips kept moving downwards, making me nervously hold onto that hand.

Helios: [more sexy whispering] What’s the matter? Don’t you want to learn? 

Helios: I gave you the chance to leave.

Helios: But you refused. 

[Fourth Part]

Helios implemented his teaching method, “diligently” teaching from the most basic style, which made me extremely embarrassed.

MC: [flustered] ….Can you put on some clothes next time? *MC, no!! What are you even asking?! You enjoy it and you know it! 🥵

Helios: I can wear what I like. 

Seeing the obvious teasing in his eyes, I ran away completely.

Finally, I asked him about what would happen on the seventh day of July, and his expression became a little solemn under the clear moonlight.

Gradually, I became even more sure that this was related to what he had done for so many years.

(Cut to store)

In the early morning of the seventh day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar, a few foreigners in suits and arrogant expressions came to the store.

These people seemed to be a little unkind, and my heart felt uneasy.

Waiter: Miss MC, a guest of the boss, made a reservation at Spring Moon Pavillion.

MC: Let me take care of it.

With a smile, I went to the foreigners and led them to the booth. I didn’t expect that Helios would already be waiting there.

The moment he saw me, his brows lightly furrowed and he tilted his head slightly.

“Leave.”

I blinked and instantly understood what he meant. After the foreigners walked into the booth, they positioned themselves again at the door.

MC: Boss, your guests are here.

After that, I took a step back and then ridicule suddenly rang out.

??: Leaving already?

Unexpectedly, a foreigner walked over, grabbed my wrist and dragged me directly into the booth.

??: Helios, you must have misunderstood.

??: What is the meaning of a group of men when talking about business?

The foreigner smiled sarcastically. I restrained the urge to shoot and looked at Helios cautiously.

In the next second, an invisible cold front flew past my face, grazing the wrist of the foreigner and leaving behind a small, bloody wound. 

No one knew when he fired the shot, and Helios was still leaning on the sofa, lazily looking at the wailing foreigner. He made no effort to hide his coldness and murderous intent.

Helios: Next time, it’ll be your head. 

Helios: Come here.

I stood cautiously behind Helios, and saw a man in a white suit standing up with a feigned smile.

Foreigner: Just kidding. Don’t get upset, Helios.

Helios: Is that what you learned by spying on me every day?

My heart sank and I tried my best to calm my nerves.

Have these people been spying on him?

Foreigner: Don’t say that, we just need to confirm whether you are worthy of our cooperation.

Foreigner: After all, with this kind of business, ordinary people are not eligible to participate.

Foreigner: But….we also have to look at the sincerity of the boss.

His eyes moved from Helios to me with an arrogant smile.

Foreigner: I heard that you have a well-trained girl who is clever and easy to use. I wonder if you are willing to share?

I was shocked and couldn’t move. I waited quietly for Helios’ answer.

Helios: I can. 

The cicadas kept humming noisily, and for an instant, I seemed to be back to that moment from four years ago, when there was only haziness left in this world.

But I just blinked and walked respectfully from the back of the sofa to the foreigners.

It sounded like a serious matter. Maybe he wanted me to be an undercover agent for these foreigners?

Or maybe he just changed his mind again and didn’t need me anymore.

My vision became a little blurred.

Helios: Did you really think I would say that? 

Helios’ arms encircled me from behind. His familiar breath came over me, and his voice was filled with pure mockery.

Foreigner: Helios, what do you mean?

Helios: Your nonsense... will anyone still want it?

The foreigner was stunned as if he didn’t expect him to say that. But in the next second, his expression became fierce again.

Foreigner: So it was you who brought those people…!

In the horrified eyes of those foreigners, Helios’ smile became even more ruthless.

Helios: I’ve been tired of looking at the faces of you idiots for a long time now. 

Helios: I asked you to come today to settle the account.

At Helios’ signal, I slowly withdrew from the booth.

(Cut to lobby)

I didn’t know what would happen to them next, but maybe something would briefly end today.

I returned to the lobby and asked for the guestbook from the front desk. I wanted to distract myself but there was one face that was stuck in my mind.

Helios won’t get hurt, right?

Helios: ….MC.

Did I trouble him again just now?

Helios: MC.

An impatient sigh sounded in my ears and I felt my figure tilt, and in the next moment, I was trapped in someone’s arms.  

Helios: Didn’t you hear me calling you?

MC: Helios….!

Helios: I should’ve said that only you can’t call me by that name.

In this lighted corner, the ambiguous gazes of the other guests in the lobby wandered over to us.

MC: Did you just call me? Wait… Has your matter been resolved?

MC: And let me go first. Th-there are other guests here.

Helios: This is my restaurant.

His fingertips rested on the guestbook, and a faint chilly scent emanated from him.

Helios: Did you really think I would give you to those people just now?

MC: ….

He narrowed his eyes, his voice carrying with it some faint, dangerous warning.

MC: …. I didn’t.

Helios: You’re a terrible liar.

Helios: Why did you walk over?

MC: Because I believe in you. I know you have your reasons.

I couldn’t help holding onto his drooping lapels. At this moment, Helios seemed to reveal all those sharp edges and corners of his heart. 

There were only some unfamiliar ones left, which belonged to the insecurities of youth.

Helios: Ridiculous.

As he said this, he pulled me up and walked into the depths of the lobby.

MC: ….Sorry.

Helios: I’m talking about myself. 

I looked up in surprise and saw his slightly ironic expression.

Helios: They have a large munitions factory behind them.

His voice was indifferent, but what he said was like a time bomb, going off in my brain.

MC: Munitions factory?!

Helios: Those foreigners have been smuggling arms into the city.

Helios: I couldn’t find the buyers and sellers, but there was always a steady stream of arms that kept coming into the city.

Hearing this, I felt cold sweat ooze from my back.

I knew what the meaning was behind all of this.

I remembered the unfinished words under the hideous faces of those foreigners just now.

Helios had found those people now.

MC: Why…. are you telling me this?

Helios: Because I want to.

In the midst of my wildly racing heartbeat, his words were sure and firm, as if something seemed to be coming to light. 

MC: The merchants and bureaucrats that you suppressed were all related to this, right?

Helios’ silence secretly confirmed my suspicions, and my heart couldn’t help but race.

He always carried all the dangers by himself; walking alone in silence.

Why not ask other people for help?

Just as I was about to ask, I immediately thought of the answer.

With the continuous delivery of arms, both buyers and sellers were in the dark, and easy actions against them would only be a surprise.

Did he destroy those arms?

Helios: Strength and weapons are necessary. 

Helios: Those who really need it will use them to protect important things.

He said this matter of factly with determined eyes as if understanding what I was thinking in my heart.

We walked through the corridor of the hotel and came to the street from the side door.

The dusk was heavy, the red lanterns softly brightening the sights of the entire street, and it was full of liveliness.

The girls blushed as they cuddled up with their partners under the lights and the crescent silver moon.

Such a quiet night made my nose itch.

MC: If those goods were sold to the original sellers.

MC: What would tonight have been like?

I turned my face to look at Helios by my side. The warm yellow lights shone on the side of his stern face. He didn’t say a word, probably accepting something reluctantly.

MC: What you said about this world… What do you think it will look like in the future?

Helios: There is only brief peace at the moment. 

Helios: But suffering will bloom into a flower. (Sidenote: what he means to say is "no pain, no gain." It's one of Kiro's character themes :>)

He raised his head slightly, and the cold moonlight reflected in his blue eyes, like the sea under the moon. 

Silent and immense, as if it could contain everything.

Seeing him like this reminded me of those distant eyes.

In a ghostly manner, I took out the crumpled old photo from my purse and held it beside his face.

Helios: Why do you carry this person’s picture with you everywhere?

MC: [smiling affectionately] Because he is special to me.

Helios: And yet you still follow me?

MC: This is different.

Looking at his teasing smile, I snorted at him and looked at the boy in the photo with a warm smile.

MC: You said that when technology advances in the future, this photo will definitely become the colour in my memory.

Under the blue sky, the blond boy was like a passionate golden sun under the eyes of the crowd.

He smiled and seemed to be able to become a source of invincible courage.

He could gather endless amounts of enthusiasm as long as he stood there.

His voice turned into notes and tunes, dancing along with the wind, driving some of the darkness away.

In this devastated generation, he was like a burning flame.

Kiro: I’m Kiro. 

Kiro: Thank you for listening to my song. 

Helios looked at the yellowed black and white photo, looking a bit dazed for a while, and a little lonely.

Helios: No one in this city remembers him anymore. 

MC: I still remember.

MC: Even if the whole world doesn’t, I will remember him.

In those turbulent years, I had always remembered the embers left behind by that meteor.

Once, there was a young man named Kiro who helped me through countless dark and dull times with a smile.

Until the day I met Helios. I gained the strength to live again from this person.

MC: I think you are very similar.

MC: Although your methods are different, you are both using your own strength to illuminate and empower others.

Helios’ pupils contracted unconsciously, and became deeper with my words.

The slowly rising paper lanterns glowed with a gentle light, quietly surrounding us, like a tender embrace.

Helios: You haven’t asked for this year’s peace charm.

Hearing what he said, I suddenly remembered that because of the previous kidnapping, I couldn’t find a peace charm.

MC: Seeing your attitude before, I thought that there was something that was making you anxious, so I kept following you.

Helios: What attitude?

MC: You said I should leave before the seventh day of July. I asked you about it later, but you didn’t say anything. Wasn’t it about that serious matter?

Hearing my question, Helios froze for a moment and then turned his face to the side, his earlobes slowly turning red.

MC: Was that not what it meant?

Helios: …. 

He pursed his mouth and the lights shone behind him like a splendid landscape painting.

Helios: Because “weakness” really does become a weakness.

MC: Huh?

Helios: You are the only person here who wants me to be safe and live a long life.

Helios: I was reluctant to wait until the Qixi Festival this year.

Helios: Although, I don’t understand why you would want to wish for peace during the Qixi Festival.

My heart was beating fast, and seeing Helios’ face turned to the side, I found his eyes to be brighter than the stars.

MC: [blushing] Because, because I just happened to run into you at that time. *Changed some wording*

MC: And if it’s the New Year, the wishes would all pile up on top of each other, and God won’t be able to hear them.

MC: During the Qixi Festival, maybe God is used to hearing the wishes for marriage, so he can hear my request for peace without needing it to unheard.

Helios: Then today, in addition to asking for peace, you can also wish for marriage.

Helios smiled slightly with some clarity and sincerity.

MC: ….In that case, a name is needed.

MC: But you never let me call you by this name.

I held my breath nervously and saw his face slowly leaning towards me. I didn’t mind the attention around me, and his breath slowly entangled with mine. 

Helios: Let me see.

His protracted tone was a bit tempting and bewitching as if it had lost a thick shell; more naked and intimate than usual, and finally landed on my lips.

Helios: Ki-Ro. 

Helios: Please use that name.

End

 You can find the call that comes after this date here!

[gotham-ruaidh]

Little Bit Better Than I Used To Be

Catch up: Chapter 1 (Starry Eyes) || Chapter 2 (Save Our Souls) || Chapter 3 (Dancing On Glass) || Chapter 4 (Merry-Go-Round) || Backstage (1) || Backstage (2) || Chapter 5 (Danger) || Backstage (3) || Chapter 6A (Love Walked In) ||| Also posted at AO3

—

Chapter 6B: Without You

Without you in my life // I'd slowly wilt and die But with you by my side // You're the reason I'm alive...

Soundtrack: “Without You,” Mötley Crüe, 1989 [click here to listen]

Six A.M. – Claire quietly shut her door and softly padded down the hallway toward the dining room.

The Ridge’s sleeping quarters reminded her of her college dorm – a long hallway of single rooms, with a shared bathroom at the end of the hall. Women were up here on the second floor – men were in a separate wing on the other side of the dining room, which with the therapy rooms and administrative offices sat at the middle of the large building.

As she entered the dining room, she smiled a hello at Glenna, a kind middle-aged woman who organized breakfast, among dozens of other jobs. Glenna had had a terrible addiction to pills – “just like you, dear, and I overcame it, so you can too” – and had found a home at The Ridge keeping the whole operation running.

“You’re up early,” Glenna remarked as Claire poured herself a cup of coffee.

Claire stirred in cream and sugar. “I haven’t been able to sleep.”

Glenna set down a tray of piping hot cinnamon buns. “It will be a while before you do. Remember, your body is still in shock. It will take longer than you want, to find a new rhythm. Be patient.”

“I will. Thanks, Glenna.”

Glenna gestured with her head toward the porch. “He’s out there.”

Claire frowned. “Who?”

Glenna smiled. “Who do you think? It’s none of my business – but you’re well-suited.”

Claire piled two cinnamon buns on a plate, her heart beating a bit faster. “There’s nothing going on between us. Besides, isn’t it against the rules?”

Glenna set one hand on her hip. “Not yet there isn’t. And since when did the rules ever stop either of you?”

Claire smiled and shook her head, already crossing the empty dining room.

As soon as she popped her head outside, she saw him – alone in the corner of the porch.

As she approached, she saw he had an acoustic guitar on his lap, strumming quietly, scribbling in a notebook.

“Good morning.”

He looked up at her, suddenly beaming. “Early to bed, early to rise, hmm?”

She held out the plate, and he took a bun. “I figured, might as well get up.” She sat down next to him, set down the plate, and took a long sip of coffee. “Do you always get up this early?”

Chewing, he turned back his guitar, plucking quietly at the strings. “Yeah. Being here is the first regular sleep schedule I’ve had in years. This may sound terrible – but I realize now that I’d forgotten how to fall asleep.”

She wrapped her hands around the coffee mug. “What do you mean?”

He tapped the side of the guitar. “I was drinking two bottles of Jack a day, Claire. I’d have it with breakfast, throughout the morning, before a gig, after a gig. I’d just pass out at some early hour, with some girl who I’d picked up at the gig or at a strip club after the gig, and then wake up sometime the next day. And when I wasn’t touring – I’d still drink a lot. Hang out with my friends, or with the band – go out, hit the clubs, maybe do a few bumps of coke. But it would always end the same way, passed out on a floor or a couch or, on better nights, my bed.”

She watched a blue jay flit from tree to tree, down below in the forest.

“I had so many chances over the years to wake up. It’s so clear to me now. There was one day when we were in the studio, laying down a new track – and I needed to take a break, so I’d gone to a smaller practice studio next door. With a speedball in my pocket. So I helped myself to it, and I don’t remember what happened next, but my producer tells me that a few minutes later I’d buzzed him on the intercom, and asked him for a gun so that I could shoot the men in top hats who were coming out of the speakers.”

Claire swirled her half-empty coffee cup. “I’d work three days on, three days off. It’s a punishing schedule – but I knew that going in. After a long day with several surgeries, I’d crash. Sometimes I’d have to be on call, so I’d sleep in this little room we had upstairs in the staff area. It had two sets of bunk beds and a shower – all a body needs. But I’d be so wired from the adrenaline – from needing to focus so much on the patients – that I couldn’t sleep, you know?”

He nodded. “I know. I know exactly what you mean.”

“The pills helped me sleep. That’s what I told myself at first. And I didn’t feel terrible when I woke up – especially if someone was banging on the door, giving me a five minute warning to get back downstairs. I could get all of the sleep with all of the alertness on the other end. But then…well.” She sighed. “Then it got to the point where I told myself I couldn’t sleep at all if I didn’t have the pills – even on my days off. Because I had to sleep, to make up for the sleep I’d lost when I was on call. And then I was taking them during the day, to calm down.”

He turned a new page in his notebook, pulled out a pen from behind his ear, and scribbled something.

“I guess you’re working on something new?”

He nodded. “Sometimes the music comes first. Sometimes it’s the lyrics that come first. But if I don’t write it down, I won’t remember it the next day.” He frowned. “Come to think of it – it must be because my memory was so shot from the booze, that I wasn’t even capable of remembering.”

He cleared his throat, and set down the guitar, and picked up a cup of coffee. “What do you think? You’re a doctor, after all.”

She smirked. “I’m a surgeon, not a neurologist. But it sounds plausible. Can you remember things better now, that you’re sober?”

He nodded. “It’s crazy. I just feel so much…clearer. In control. It’s good to be in control.” He took another bite of cinnamon bun. “Are you feeling that?”

She sighed. “I’m feeling. I didn’t want to feel anything for the longest time. But now I’m feeling…just feeling.”

Footsteps on the deck behind them – Rupert, shuffling in his bathrobe, blearily waving hello, clutching a gigantic cup of coffee.

A beat.

How to find common ground outside of their addictions?

“Can you tell me more about that song you’re writing?”

He set down his coffee and picked up the notebook, flipping back to the previous page. Set it on the table between them. Picked up his guitar. Looked down at his notes. Started to sing – his voice quiet, clear, strong.

Without you, there's no change My nights and days are grey If I reached out and touched the rain It just wouldn't feel the same

Without you, I'd be lost I'd slip down from the top I'd slide down so low Girl you never, never know...

Without you, without you A sailor lost at sea Without you, woman, the world comes down on me

“I don’t know where to go from there,” he said, continuing to play slow notes on his guitar. “Need more verses, of course. Maybe a space for a guitar solo. I don’t know.” He looked up at her. “What do you think?”

Rupert clapped and hooted from across the porch. Giving Claire enough time to find her voice.

“I think you’ve got a keeper there,” she said softly.

He held her gaze. “I’m glad you think so.”

“Play Freebird!” Rupert shouted.

They shared a smile.

Claire’s world tilted just a little.

[rockthingsbymeg]

A couple drinks

Pairing: Slash / Saul Hudson x reader

Info: fluff and smut and 5 seconds or so of angst; 4231 words;

A/N: Hey guys. Here’s another fic for you. I am doing my best to work on the last requests, but I’m also working on a multi-chapter fic that I hope you guys enjoy <3

Y/N's head spun, her vision was blurry and the music seemed way too loud but to say that she wasn't having a great time would be a lie. She had a nearly finished bottle of Daniel's in her hand and was talking to a few of her friends, laughter echoing around their group.

Her attention, however, was not entirely on the friends by her side. It was, instead, on the guy that had invited them to the party in the first place.

He was sitting on the couch talking with two of his bandmates, all of them good friends of Y/N, and somewhere along the night he had lost his shirt and jacket, much to Y/N's happiness. He was a bit sweaty, probably due to the amount of people gathered in such a small space, and his torso shone under the red light that illuminated the room.

His hair was wild and free, voluminous curls all over the place, covering his eyes as usual but this time not covering the wide and a bit drunk smile that he had on his lips.

God. That smile did things to her...

Her eyes continued to scan him, taking a look at how good his legs looked with those leather pants clinging to them. She could make out the faint outline of his dick, since he always skipped underwear, and it made her mouth water and her teeth sink down on her bottom lip to stop an involuntary groan from coming out.

All she wanted to do was straddle him and fuck him right on the couch, in front of everyone.

So, in her drunk bliss and courage, that became her plan. She turned away from her friends without a word, leaving them looking at her a bit confused but quickly going back to their conversation, downed the remainder of her whiskey in record time, threw the bottle onto the floor and confidently made her way to the couch where he sat on.

She was swaying with each step, bumping into strangers who paid her no mind, until she finally made it to him.

"Hey." He grinned up at her, curls falling from his eyes.

Y/N said nothing as she moved closer to him and sat down on his lap.

Slash jumped a bit at the action, surprisingly way soberer than her, and looked at her with furrowed eyebrows as she placed one of her hands on his shoulder and the other on his chest. His hands instinctively fell on her thighs, but he quickly moved them to her hip bones, stopping her from moving too close to him.

"What are yo-" He began to ask, only to be cut off as Y/N glued her lips to his without hesitation.

His eyes widened to the size of billiard balls as Duff and Steven immediately cheered them on. The entire band knew Slash liked her, though he would never admit it (or so he thought; he never seemed to remember the power that alcohol held over people in love), and it was clear she liked him back, but none of them had ever taken action.

His immediate reaction was to push Y/N off. She was drunk and if he hadn't been able to tell that by the way she swayed as she got closer to the couch, he could tell either by the way she clumsily fell on his lap or by the intense flavor of alcohol on her lips.

He swore he was going to push her off, but then her tongue licked his lips and ventured inside his mouth and against his own just as her hand moved down on his body, stopping right on his dick. He moaned at the action, eyes falling closed and mind losing itself on the kiss for a bit, but then Y/N tried to rock her hips forward and he was quickly brought back to the reality that she was drunk.

"Y/N-" He spoke, pulling her hands from his body and breaking the kiss. "Stop. I think it's time you go home." He smiled tenderly at the girl, doing his best to avoid looking at her pouty, kiss-swollen lips.

"I want you." She mewled, trying to kiss him again.

Slash felt his steadily hardening dick twitch at the words and the syrupy tone in which they dripped from her lips. "C'mon, lets get you home." He stated, more to himself, and got up from the couch, steadying her on her feet and putting her left arm around his neck while his right one wrapped around her waist. He managed to get his leather jacket on his body as he helped Y/N walk.

"Look at him doing the right thing..." Duff teased, taking a swing from his bottle of vodka. He knew Slash would never take advantage of a girl as wasted as Y/N if he wasn't just as drunk, but it didn't stop him from joking.

"Shut the fuck up..."Slash groaned with a faint blush on his cheeks, walking over to Y/N's friends to let them know he was taking her home which, thankfully, was only a block away from his own.

Y/N was smaller than him and that helped a little with the task of dragging her down the street. It was quite the trip, with Y/N either giggling like mad at nothing or trying to pull him for a kiss. It really tested his willpower...

He managed to get her home and had to, very unceremoniously, shove his hand down her back pockets in order to find her keys, but he wasn't going to say he was exactly mad about that. Why would he be mad for touching her ass?

He opened the door and helped her inside, closing it behind himself a bit louder than intended. Y/N slipped from his grip and fell right on her ass in the middle of the floor, but was totally unfazed by the events, simply laying down and looking up at him with her lower lip trapped between her teeth, hooded eyes scanning him up and down.

"Why are you so hot?" She asked, giggling a little as his fingers brushed over sensitive places on her side while he picked her up again. "Like, you're so hot-" She continued, being interrupted by a hiccup. "It hurts. I get so wet just thinking about you..."

Those words left her lips right when she leaned on him, hot breath fanning over the sensitive skin of his neck and velvety voice dripping with filth right by his ear.

"Fuck me..." He mumbled lowly, picking her up bridal style and walking the short distance to her bathroom.

He sat her on the toilet and helped her out of her top. His eyes stopped on her breasts, considering Y/N had decided to skip the bra, but he quickly turned his head away and focused on removing the rest of her clothes.

He really loved to see her legs in leather pants, but he had never hated said article of clothing this much. He had already removed her shoes and was now left with the hard task of pulling the skin-tight pants from her body.

Y/N was not being very helpful, but it was expected. She was just sitting there, bare breasts still looking very tempting, looking down at him on his knees, in front of her, with hooded eyes.

He avoided looking up as much as he could and after many attempts, he finally managed to pull her clothes from her body. He got up from the floor and walked to her shower, leaving the water to warm up while he helped on her feet again.

"Y/N, look at me." He spoke softly, trying his hardest not to groan at the sight and feeling of her breasts pressing against his chest as soon as she tumbled forward and fell against him. "You're going to take a quick shower okay? Don't get your hair wet. Can you do that for me?" He smiled.

"You want to get me all wet for you?" She giggled seductively (well, as seductively as as someone as drunk as her could).

Slash groaned at her words. "C'mon, Y/N."

"I'll make you a deal, poodle boy." She spoke, straightening herself up, trying to sound serious. "I'll be a good girl for you and shower, if you fuck me after that."

"Okay, deal." He lied. There was no deal, much to the dismay of the rock hard dick between his legs.

Y/N grinned like a kid on Christmas morning and pulled her panties off. Slowly but less clumsily than before she got under the water and used the smaller shower head to wash herself.

As much as Slash would love to just stand there and watch her hands roam her body, he forced himself to leave the bathroom to go in search of some medicine that she always kept near her booze to help with hangovers in the morning.

He filled a glass with water and took out two pills, bringing them to her room and leaving everything on her nightstand. He then went back to her bathroom, standing by the door and waiting for her to finish.

Over a minute after she closed the water off, he heard her tumble against the wall and immediately rushed inside, finding her trying to balance herself out with her soaking feet sliding across the tiles.

He picked up her towel and wrapped it around her body, steadying her while she dried off as best as she could. Once she got herself clean enough, he picked her up again, searching his mind for the biggest turn offs so he wouldn't think about her naked body pressed against him.

He sat her down on the bed and pulled out one of the large t-shirts she always slept in, pulling it over her head. Before he allowed her to lay down under the covers, he made her drink a few sips of water.

Sleep was already taking over her body and the deal she made had slipped away from her mind, thankfully. He helped her snuggle herself under the covers and pressed a kiss to her forehead before leaving the room.

He didn't feel like going back to the party, especially not with his dick fully hard and nearly leaking, so he decided to sleep on her couch for the night. He flipped through channels on her TV until he found some shitty porn, settling himself for it while he pulled his dick out and let his eyes slip closed, picturing a very naked Y/N in the dirtiest scenarios he could, the high pitched moans coming from the TV helping out.

[...]

Y/N woke up that morning to a pounding head and an urge to throw up. She didn't move for the next ten minutes, allowing the urge to leave her body, and only then she carefully sat up on her mattress.

She did not remember how she got home or how she managed to take a shower, judging by the white towel left carelessly on the floor and the no longer existent sweat on her body. She turned her head to the side and saw the pills and the water on her nightstand, which led her to the conclusion that someone had taken her home and helped her out. She took them and slowly got up, trying to recollect some of her memories from the previous night (with little to no success).

She had made her way to the kitchen, the thought that whoever helped her last might still be on her home not even crossing her mind, and started to make herself some breakfast.

Slash woke up to the noise she made and sat up on the couch. Looking over to the kitchen, he found Y/N in the exact same clothes he left her last night, no more no less, while bent over her fridge to pick whatever she was looking for.

The t-shirt she was in was large, but not large enough to cover her ass if she bent like she did. Her pussy was completely exposed to him until she straightened herself, and honestly, Slash could not have asked for a better sight to wake up to.

"Morning." He greeted in his raspy morning voice, making Y/N scream and nearly drop the box of juice in her hands.

"Jesus fucking... You asshole!"

Slash laughed at her reaction, wrapping the blanket he stole last night around his waist and walking over to her. "Sorry..."

He was leaning against the counter, arms crossed over his chest as he watched her reach one of her cabinets in search of a glass. "You want some?" Slash was too busy looking down at the exposed skin of her ass to notice she had spoken. "Slash?" Y/N asked, turning around to look at him.

As soon as he was no longer able to see her ass, his eyes snapped back up at her face. Hopefully, she wouldn't notice. "What?"

"You want some juice too?" She asked again.

"Sure, thank you." Slash smiled, watching her stand on her toes, her shirt riding up one more time. "I'll get it." He mumbled, reaching for the glass himself, consequently pressing his half hard dick against the side of her leg.

Y/N bit on her lower lip at the feeling, tugging slightly on her shirt to fully cover her ass. Slash blushed as he noticed her action, taking a seat on the counter and putting one of his bare feet up as well, so his hard on wouldn't be so visible.

She poured them juice in the glasses and handed him his, reaching for a box of cereal on the lower cabinet and eating bits of cereal out of the box. She was sitting on top of the table, in front of Slash, and silently extended him the box, letting him eat as well.

The awkward silence eventually melted and soon they were talking about random things, though Y/N was far less talkative than usual.

"Your head still hurts?" He asked while stuffing his mouth with cereal.

Y/N rolled his eyes at his behavior, containing the soft smile that threatened to settle itself on her lips. "Yeah. Not as bad as I thought it would though."

"I'm glad." He smiled at her.

[...]

Slash spent the entire day lazing around with her. Shortly after breakfast, Y/N had put on shorts but while they covered her pussy, they did little to nothing to cover her ass. Not that he minded of course.

He watched a bit of TV while Y/N took a nap in her bed and around noon she got up and they ordered pizza. During the afternoon, they played a few board games that Y/N owned.

While she played, her mind was trying to create a timeline for last night's events. After her nap a few memories had come back to her and all of them had her moving her eyes away from Slash.

She remembered glimpses of the night. The first one was a close up of Slash's face with his eyes wide. The second one was of her face buried in his curls while he carried her somewhere. She remembered being naked -or almost- and being pressed up right against him and also remembered him carrying her to her room and then helping her onto the shirt she currently wore, but nothing after that.

Did they do something that she didn't remember?

When she had gone to the bathroom shortly before the pizza arrived, she had found last night's clothes on the floor, but all of Slash's were in the living room, which could mean that they weren't naked "together". That did not eliminate the chance that they had sex, but it was something.

"You're thinking too loud, Y/N." Slash joked, throwing one of the dices they were using to play in her direction.

"Sorry." She chuckled, shaking her head as if trying to get rid of her thoughts.

"What were you thinking about?" He asked while she played, nudging her leg with his foot.

"Oh, just about the party. Nothing important." She assured with a soft smile.

"What about it?"

Y/N hesitated for a bit, nibbling on her lower lip. "We didn't... We..." She stuttered, not sure about what to ask exactly. "What happened last night?"

Slash sensed her hesitation and smiled reassuringly at her. "You had a lot to drink. Out of nowhere you came up to me and sat down on my lap..." He spoke, holding a chuckle as he saw her hide her blush. "And then you kissed me."

"Oh my God..." She mumbled hiding her face in her hands.

"If it helps, that was not the worst part..."

Her head shot up and her eyes widened. "What?!"

"I brought you home and when I was taking you to your bathroom you told me you got really wet thinking about me, after asking me why I was so hot." He said sheepishly, knowing she was mortified by her own actions. A weird feeling made his heart ache.

Was all of that a drunk urge?

"Then I helped you undress and told you to shower, and you asked me if I wanted to get you all wet for me. And then agreed to be a good girl for me if I fucked you after you showered." He said, wanting to be fully honest with her.

Slash had never seen a blush so deep on someone's cheeks until this day.

"I'm so sorry..." She whispered, barely able to speak through the embarrassment. "I... I wasn't thinking..."

"Hey." He spoke, reaching a hand out for her when he noticed tears pooling on her eyes. "It's okay, Y/N."

She hastily cleaned her eyes before any tears spilled but kept her head lowered. A suffocating silence fell upon them, no one sure about what to say or do.

The same question he asked himself a little over a minute ago echoed again in his head. He needed an answer.

"Did you... Did you do all that just because you were drunk?"

Y/N looked up at him. He wasn't exactly avoiding her eyes, but it was clear that he was uncomfortable. "What?"

"All of the things you did and said... Did you do them just because you were drunk or was it something... that you thought about in other moments?" He tried his best to explain.

If anyone else had asked her about this, she would have lied and said it was purely a drunk urge. But this was Slash. She had never lied to him, partially because she didn't want to, partially because she literally couldn't. She wanted to be true to him at all times, no matter how embarrassing or sad or whatever it was for her.

Despite that, she could not speak. Her brain refused to form a coherent sentence. 

So she acted instead of speaking.

She crawled around her coffee table and sat by his side. With shaky hands, she cupped his cheeks and turned his face to her, joining their lips in a soft, shy kiss.

Slash had been longing for her lips from the minute they left his own at the party. He didn't hesitate to pull her closer, helping her pass one of her legs over his body and straddle him.

His hands moved down her side and to the small of her back, keeping her body flush against his as her tongue entered his mouth and rolled softly against his.

During the day, it hadn't even crossed his mind to put on his clothes, so all that separated them were her flimsy clothes and his thin sheet. That thought made his dick get harder faster that it had previously been doing, and it only got worse as she tangled her hands in his hair and began to softly rut her hips.

They could both feel the lust pooling inside their bodies, a hot fire burning deep in their abdomen. Slash's hands got more adventurous and moved under her shirt, once again feeling her soft skin under his calloused fingertips. Her own had wandered lower down his body, short nails lightly scraping against stomach.

Her hips began to pick up speed, making the soft fabric of the sheet move against his now fully hard cock.

"Y/N..." He moaned softly, breaking the kiss and hiding his face on her neck, groping her ass and helping her move. Slash had thought that when she changed clothes she had put on underwear and well, but he now realized that she didn't. "Forgot your panties?" He joked, leaving a soft bite on her neck.

"Slash..." She breathed out, doing her bet to pull the sheet away from his body and free his cock.

He got her clue and picked her up, walking the short distance to her couch and placing her down on it, pulling the blanket away from his body. Y/N was going to pull off her clothes, but Slash stopped her.

"Don't take 'em off..." He said, pulling her shorts to the side. The piece of clothing was small but thankfully loose, so it easily gave him access to her wet core.

"Fuck me, Slash... C'mon." She moaned, looking at him with lust blow pupils.

He pushed himself inside her in one smooth thrust, groaning at the warmth of her pussy around him. Her legs wrapped themselves around his waist in instinct, but he brought them up to his shoulders and stroked the skin of her thighs. Her hands held on to the pillow behind her, lips parted and letting out short breaths.

"You good?" He asked, desperate to move.

"Yeah. Fuck me, come on..." She urged, clenching down on him voluntarily and locking her gaze with his.

He groaned at the sudden tightness and set a harsh pace, pulling all the way to the tip then fucking back strongly into her, hitting her g-spot with scary precision. Her breasts accompanied the thrusts, the shape created by them on her t-shirt driving Slash up the walls.

"You're so hot, Y/N." He moaned, gripping her thighs tightly and picking up his speed. "Fucking wish you could see yourself, baby..."

Y/N, however, was pretty happy with her own view. She loved the sight of Slash's hands on her thighs and the feeling of his bare abs hitting her legs as he slammed into her, low groans and moans leaving his parted lips. His eyes were darker than usual, looking down at her with such an intense stare that it made her insides burn harder.

"Rub your clit for me..." He moaned, moving his hands to her waist and slightly lifting her up, pushing himself even deeper inside her.

She shoved one of her hands down her shorts and began rubbing circles on her clit, making her moans get higher in pitch and frequency, soon overpowering the sound of his hips snapping against her body.

Her orgasm was getting closer and closer, and the sight of Slash throwing his head back as she clenched down on him was definitely a great fuel.

His own orgasm was close too, his cock twitching inside her with each thrust, his body eagerly chasing release like an animal in heat.

"Fuck, Slash... I'm close..." She moaned, arching her back, which made the shape of her breasts get even more defined on her shirt.

"Cum on my dick, Y/N... Fucking do it..." He groaned, thrusting as fast and hard as he could.

Her fingers matched his speed and soon her orgasm was crashing down on her. Her legs shook violently against his body, her pussy becoming impossibly tight and the rest of her body freezing up as wave after wave of pleasure overtook her.

Slash held himself back, letting her ride out her high before getting to his own. It was a hard thing to do, but as soon as he felt her body grow limp against his he was moving her legs to the sides of his body and pulling out, wrapping his hand around himself.

"Where?" He asked between moans, watching her pull her hand from her clit and then pulling her shorts to the side, exposing her pussy.

"Coat it with your cum, Slash, please..." She breathed out, watching him release rope after rope of cum on top of her pussy, some of it landing on her clothes.

The warm liquid made its way between her already slick folds, the feeling of it absolutely sinful. Slash watched with hungry eyes as it coated her fluttering entrance, mixing with her own juices and continuing to slide lower and lower.

She reached for his hands and pulled him down for a kiss, humming against his lips as his tongue ventured inside her mouth and rubbed softly against her own.

He reached for the sheet that was thrown on the floor by their side to clean off their bodies, not breaking the kiss, and then rested his body on top of hers, gently cupping the side of her left breast on his hand and just stroking it.

"Stay over again?" She suggested, breaking the kiss for a few seconds.

"Why not?" He smirked, kissing her again.

------

Thank you so much for reading. Likes, reblogs, comments and any kind of way you show me you liked this are endlessly appreciated💛

Requests are closed.

Taglist: @curly-hudson​; @agroupiewhore; @littlemisscare-all​

Thank you @dustnbones​ for beta-reading💛

[thran-duils]

Doll Me Up (P.8)

Title: Doll Me Up (Part Eight) Summary: Fem!Reader x Dark Mob!Tony Stark. On good days, you and Tony were a power couple. You, a perfect trophy wife with your hands in local charities to promote a wholesome image. Tony, business man but sullied with organized crime. He indulged in his illegal gambling, extortion, and political corruption. And he indulged in his escort business. Hell, that is where he had found you. You were a brat, and he loved a challenge. Words: 2,487 Warnings: Unhealthy relationships, smut, daddy kink, dom/sub, manipulation, death, violence, possessive behavior, drug use Author’s Note:  **More mentions of Tony doing cocaine and with RDJ’s past, that may be offensive to some! Head’s up! You have been warned**

Part Seven || Part Nine || Masterpost (mobile) || Fanfic masterpost

Three months ago (cont.)…

Tony was fidgeting in the seat next to you and you stayed silent, knowing he was riled up and giving him any type of poke was going to set him off again. Granted, you really did not have to do anything yourself to set him off; he was good enough at doing that himself.

His gaze fell on you beside him and he gestured fiercely at Mikhail driving in the front seat. “See? This is how you get faded and take a joy ride! Speaking of which.”

He pulled a baggy out of his pocket and muttered under his breath angrily. “So fucking stupid, Y/N.” He took a pinch out of the bag. “Don’t be a fucking idiot. Don’t get your rocks off and then fucking…” he inhaled the small bump and leaned back, stuffing the closed baggy back in his pocket. It took a few minutes for him to say, “Fucking take a car that I paid for. And then try to kill yourself!”

Angrily, you responded, “I didn’t try to kill myself! I was going to my friend’s! I just wanted to be away from you being a dick for a while!”

Tony pinned you up against the seat, his fingers digging in. “You are reckless! You drive me fucking insane sometimes! You are going to be on a very short leash, you understand me? And me being a dick? Because I told you no? You know, I am right telling you that! You can’t even conduct yourself well at home under supervision. What would you do if I wasn’t there to watch out for you? Huh?”

You tried to look away from him and his hand left your chest and came up to force you to look back at him. “You better count yourself lucky that there are people over cause that means I’m not gonna spank you just yet. When we get back, you’re going to walk that ass of yours out to the pool and sit right where I can see you. You got me?” You took more than a few seconds to answer, and he demanded again, “I said you got me?”

“Yes,” you forced out.

He let you go roughly and sat back against his seat, still glaring daggers through you. You turned your eyes away and you still felt him staring at you for a few moments before he shifted, and you saw out of the corner of your eye that he had pulled his phone out. Tony busied himself on his phone the rest of the way home and you sat with your arms crossed, staring out the window.

“Pull up out front, we’ll get out there and then you can go down into the garage,” Tony told Mikhail as he pulled into the driveway.

When you got out of the car out front of the house, Tony was at your side, holding on tight. Like he did not expect you to follow what he had ordered you to do. The music was still playing outside, and you heard chatter; the party was still going in the two of your absence.

Coming through the living room, the two of you met Happy coming back from what you assumed was the bathroom.

Happy looked relieved to see you. “Oh, so you found her.”

“Unfortunately,” you snapped at him, yanking your arm away from Tony, just wanting to walk on your own.

He was quick though and grabbed you back, turning and pushing you up against the wall, holding you in place with a hand on your chest, his other finger pointing in your face.

“You are being a fucking brat! Cut the shit! Shape the hell up. I won’t have you embarrassing me out there! I know you can act better!”

Tony let you go and gestured for you to walk on. You sucked your teeth and went forward, shooting a look at Happy who was watching you closely. He looked as unimpressed as Tony was. Tony was at your back as you walked outside, and you went straight for the alcohol.

“Yeah, good idea. More alcohol. But you know, maybe it’ll chill you the hell out,” he said quietly, annoyed to you. He took the bottle from you and poured the shots for you. Picking it up, he shoved one into your hand and took the other for himself. Clinking your shot glasses, he downed it, you following his lead.

His hand snaked around your hips and he gave you a push to start walking. You did not miss some of his men at the table watching the pair of you approach. He gave you a forceful shove to sit in one of the chairs at the poker table and you fell back into it. Hands gripping the arms, you did your best to not clench your jaw as he sat down next to you. Tony knew you would be embarrassed to be out here – no doubt everyone knowing something had to have happened if Tony and you both left, even if they were not privy to the details – and that was the form of punishment he was choosing for now. Everyone knowing that you had done something to piss him off and now you were being forced to sit there and be obedient.

<><><>

Later that same night…

“I still can’t believe she pulled that shit,” Tony spat, rubbing at his mouth furiously.

Him, Mikhail, and Happy were sitting around the fire pit. The party had long since died down and it was just the three of them outside in the dark, still having some drinks. Tony had sent Y/N upstairs an hour ago and told her if she opened the bedroom door, F.R.I.D.A.Y. would notify him.

“She’s got a wild streak,” Happy commented, taking a long inhale off his cigar.

“Something I’m simultaneously attracted to and also wanna smack her a good one over,” Tony muttered. He shook his head and sighed, “Fucking scared the shit out of me. The thought of losing her. Especially like that.”

“Get her pregnant. Lock her down,” Mikhail said simply. Happy and Tony stared at him and Mikhail rose an eyebrow. “What? She’ll have to be more cautious and then you don’t have to be worried about her going anywhere. I mean, another tie to you too.”

“C’mon. Tony with a kid?” Happy laughed and then noticed Tony was not sharing in on the laugh. His laugh subsided slowly, smile shrinking. He stared at Tony in disbelief, who was lost in thought. “What? Boss, really?”

Tony shrugged and took a drink. “We’ve been together for almost two years.”

“Tony, you had to go retrieve her after she went drunk driving today,” Happy said slowly.

“She’s not usually that rash. Isolated incident.”

Happy threw his hands out weakly, throwing a desperate look at Mikhail for help. Mikhail shrugged and Happy sighed sharply. He straightened up in his chair, “So if she’s not usually that rash, why the talk of a kid? Look, has this ever come up in conversation? Does she even want a kid? I mean, not to be completely rude, but do we think we can trust her to raise one?”

“I want a kid. At least one,” Tony said at the same time that Mikahil spoke.

“She won’t have to raise it by herself. That’s what nannies are for. Give the parents a break,” Mikhail chimed in and Happy set his jaw, looking like he wanted to sock him.

Tony nodded slowly, taking that in.

Mikhail continued, “Women think they don’t want it but if you get them pregnant, the hormones just take over. And they’re immediately momma bear.”

“I don’t think that’s exactly how it works,” Tony said cocking his head, giving Mikhail an odd look. “But I get your overall point. Just… give her some responsibility. Focus on her projects and a baby. Refocus her energy.”

Happy could see the wheels turning and he knew that when Tony set his mind to something, there was very little that could dissuade him from that path.

“Well, she’s already not on birth control,” Tony said, taking another drink.

“Are you joking?” Happy asked.

“She got the IUD taken out a couple months ago. Just been using condoms… most of the time,” Tony replied, smacking his lips. “She didn’t want to get another one. An IUD. Talked about pills. But never followed up on it…”

Happy blew a raspberry and shrugged, “Well… that’s fortuitous I suppose.”

“Yeah… seems like it,” Tony said, staring off into nothing.

<><><>

“So, I overheard something…” Happy said, trailing off.

“What?” Tony questioned, leaning back in his chair.

“I think you and the missus need to have a little chat. Just to nip something in the bud,” Happy said, tapping his fingers on the desk.

Tony had just hung up with a business partner and Happy was sitting across the desk from him. The meeting had been relatively short, about twenty minutes. Happy did not waste time to bring the conversation he had overheard between Pepper and Y/N to Tony. Especially since the meeting had gone well, he would be in a better mood to hear it.

“I only caught the end of the conversation but sounded like she’s trying to figure out how to… get rid of the baby.”

Tony was silent, staring across the desk at Happy. His expression was unreadable. When he did speak though, it was not a secret he was pissed.

“Who the hellwas she talking to?”

Happy sucked his teeth and admitted, “Pepper.”

“Pepper?”

“Yes.”

Leaning forward quickly, Tony slammed his finger on the call button for her office. “Pepper!” Tony barked into the intercom on his phone.

“Yes?”

“Can you come to my office for a second.” It was not a question. It took her a few since her office was down the hall but Pepper walked into the office, standing by the door, and Tony gestured at her saying, “Closed.” She closed the door behind her and turned back to him, looking curious.

“You got anything to tell me?” Tony asked. She stared at him dumbly, shooting a look at Happy. He was returning a blank stare. Tony gestured impatiently. “Here, I’ll help. About my wife.”

Pepper shot Happy another look and he was returning a hard stare now. She surmised that he knew that Y/N had talked to her – had overheard it – and she had no opportunity to lie here.

She shrugged, “About her talking to me?”

“Mhmm,” Tony nodded, his gaze burning into her.

“She wanted me to talk to you. She thinks you’d listen to me.”

“About?”

“Not having a baby,” Pepper said plainly. Tony’s mouth fell open in anger hearing it confirmed and she said quickly, “I don’t know why she thinks you would listen to me. But I told her that’s a conversation she should be having with you, not me.”

It took Tony a few moments to gather himself before he spat, “Does she have a plan?”

“Not that I know.”

“What else did she say?” Pepper bit her bottom lip, silent. Tony demanded, “What else did she say, Pepper?”

Shrugging, Pepper treaded carefully, “She��s worried you’re gonna divorce her after ‘her body gets completely destroyed’ and then she’s ‘just gonna be stuck with a baby that she has no idea what to do with’.” She noticed the baffled looks on both Tony and Happy’s faces and sighed. “I’m assuming you didn’t hear the entire conversation,” Pepper directed at Happy. His expression said everything, and she sighed heavily again, looking back at Tony. “She is extremely insecure Tony. I don’t get it. It’s actually a little alarming. Do you get off on that?”

“No, Pepper, I don’t ‘get off’ on that,” Tony said tightly, looking offended.

Pepper closed her mouth, recognizing the anger on his face. After a few moments, she stated, “She’s scared, Tony.”

Tony was silent for an uncomfortable amount of time, pique still evident in his expression. He cleared his throat, shrugging, “Sounds like it. Anyway, I wish you would have brought this to me unprompted.”

“Tony, that conversation just happened like a half hour ago,” Pepper told him slowly.

“And you didn’t come to me immediately?”

Unamused, Pepper said, “No. I figured if she was serious she would talk to you like I told her she should. And she told me she was going to. She hasn’t had much opportunity to do so though since then and now.”

Tony snorted, “Y/N is not one for mature conversations most of the time anyway. She’s got a flair for the dramatics and gets in these moods, has outbursts. Trust me. She’s a goddamn handful. I mean, you know! The running off and starting fights.” Pepper was staring at him incredulously and he noticed. He rose a brow in return, “What?”

“Nothing,” she said flatly.

“Hmm. Well..” he exhaled deeply, smacking his lips. “Looks like I’ll just have to have a chat. Thank you for being honest, Pepper. Even if it was forced. You’re a doll.”

“Yeah.”

She turned away from him and began walking towards the door. Pepper stopped her stride and exhaled sharply before turning back around to face Tony. “You know, Tony, maybe it would serve you well to listen to her.” Tony stared at her reproachfully in return and she added forcibly, “Seriously. She sounded worried.”

“You don’t think I listen to her? What do you think I do every day, Pepper? I might miss some things admittedly because it’s very hard to keep up with her. Sometimes it changes every hour. The only things she seems to be sure on are: cuddling with me whenever possible and her charity work.”

Pepper ended with, “Well, I don’t think her ‘outbursts’ come from nowhere.”

Without another word, she turned on her heel and walked out.

Tony’s gaze slid to Happy, the two of them locking eyes, put off by her attitude.

“What… the hell just happened?”

“I don’t know, boss,” Happy admitted.

“Fucking women…” Tony trailed off, looking lost in thought. He then asked curiously, leaning forward towards Happy, “Do you think I don’t listen?” Happy gave him a knowing look and Tony snorted, waving it off. “That’s what I thought. If anything, it’s Y/N that doesn’t listen to me. Well, I am not having any more unpleasant conversations on an empty stomach.” He leaned back across his desk towards his phone again. Clicking the button to his secretary, he said, “Angelica, tell Y/N I’ll be out in a second to go to lunch.”

“She’s not out here, Mr. Stark. But—”

“What?” Tony demanded.

“She’s not—”

“I caught that,” Tony interrupted irritated.

“But I can page downstairs. She went down there with Mr. Rogers.”

“Why the fuck is Star Spangled here?” Tony grated, shoving himself away from his desk. “And why is he taking her all over the building?”

~~~

Forever tags: @coconutqueen21, @undecidedsworld

Fic tags: @kvzctam @farihafangirls, @teenageregression @mrsnegan25 @lilacs-lavender @agustdowney @kind-of-crazy-butthatsokay @emmariexx

[noladyme]

La Cuervo - Chapter 15

She is used to the biker-life, having grown into a woman in the familiar embrace of SAMCRO. A bad decision and a gun-shot later, she gets whisked off to Santo Padre, and put under the protection of another club. What is supposed to be a short stint in the Mayan headquarters just north of the border to Mexico, turns into something more; when la quervo begins to develop feelings for el angel - and he seems to return them in kind...

TW: violence, blood, drug use, alcohol, smut, fluff, angst

In the spirit of "The Crown Princess of Charming", this is a story about O.C. Nina and Angel Reyes. It is obviously non-canon, as characters who have passed on on Mayans M.C. are present in it, and others have been excluded completely. Nina is written as a cis-female, but I have tried to keep her race and looks as ambigous as possible. Should you find any of this story offensive, please let me know.

15.

“What the fuck did you do?”, Nina almost screamed. Filip moved his hands in a calming gesture. “Calm down, las’. There’s still a shitload of 7-year-olds downstairs”, he said. “I’m sure the mom is over the hills at the Mayan parade you’ve had set up!”, Nina snarled. She panicked, and began heaving for breath. She almost tripped over her own feet to reach her bag with her inhaler, but Tig made it to it before her, dug it out, and threw it to Filip; who pressed the canister top, and held it to Nina’s lips. She sucked in the powder, and felt air returning to her lungs. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck!”. “It’s fine, Nina. Everything is fine”, Filip said, and rubbed her back soothingly.

Nina ran for her bag. ”I can’t be here right now”, she said. “Good, because you won’t be for long”, Filip said. “What are you talking about?”. “You’re going home, little sister”, he smiled. She scoffed at him, and grabbed her bag. Before she could reach the stairs, T.O. once again blocked her way. “My knee. Your balls. Move!”, Nina growled. “Try me, kid”, T.O. grinned. She tried for pleading instead. “You don’t know… Please just let me go. I can’t go back. I can’t do that to… Please!”. The sound of feet on the stairs made Nina’s knees buckle, and T.O. swept her away to go sit on a stool by the bar. “Please, Taddarius…”, Nina whispered. “This is how it has to be”, T.O. replied. “Now keep your ass in that seat until we tell you otherwise”.

The Sons all gathered to greet the incoming guests. Bishop came up first, giving Filip a half hug. “It’s cold as fuck up here”, he said. “It’s 70 degrees, you didn’t come to Alaska”, Filip laughed. Bishop gave him a friendly smile, before greeting Tig. The rest of the Mayans came up behind Bishop, each in turn greeting the Sons. Nina wanted to crawl into a hole, but they all seemed to pretend like she didn’t exist; at least for now. Only EZ shot her a half smile, as he came up behind the full patches. She looked down at her hands, unable to return the gesture. When she finally lifted her eyes again, she scanned the faces of the Mayans. She saw that neither Gilly, Creeper or Angel was among them; and she was unsure whether to feel relieved or distraught at the fact that her former lover wasn’t there. Of course he doesn’t want to see me, she thought to herself. Nina didn’t know why they were there. It would be in MC fashion to throw her into a van, and drive her back to Santo Padre, to force her to fulfill her one-year promise, or lock her up in a dark room with a couple of rattlesnakes as punishment for going back on her deal; but she was also sure that SAMCRO wouldn’t let her get hurt, so the snakes seemed less likely.

Rat came up the stairs. “The mom decided to take the kids to the Chuck-E-Cheese down the road instead”, he said. “Good riddance”, Filip grinned. “Means we can break out the whiskey. Nina…?”. He looked at her meaningfully. Take you place behind the bar, he seemed to be saying. She slowly got to her feet, and slipped behind the counter, taking down the top shelf scotch. It was set up next to the framed picture of Jackson and her, at Nina’s no-baby-on-the-way-shower. Jax had a cigarette hanging from his lips, and his arm hung casually over her shoulders. In his free hand, he held a packet of condoms and birth control pills; and his grin was brighter than the sun. She’d always been impressed at how he’d managed to smile so widely, without letting his cigarette fall from his lips. Nina looked happy and a bit drunk in the picture, and her eyes were locked on her brother; full of awe and familiar love. Tearing herself from the memory of one of the happiest nights of her life, Nina lined up a row of glasses, and began pouring. Her hands were shaking, and she spilled some of the whiskey on the counter.

“Let me do that”, EZ said, having appeared next to her. Nina swallowed thickly, and handed him the bottle; before wiping her hands. “It’s a long ride to take from San Pad”, she said quietly. “We made a pitstop in San Bernardino”, EZ said, and shot her a look. “Oh…”, Nina said, and had to swallow again to wet her throat. “And Creeper, Angel and Gilly are holding down the fort at the scrapyard, I take it…?”. She deliberately didn’t mention Angel first or last, to make her seem indifferent. “Not exactly… Creep and Gilly are”. He sounded like he wanted to say more, but decided against it. Nina sighed deeply. “EZ, I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I’m just sorry”, she said bellow her breath. “I know, hermanita”, he said. “We’re good”. He shot her a smile, that reminded her how too precious for this world he was, and she couldn’t help but smile back at him.

Gathering the glasses on a tray, she went over to serve the bikers, who had gathered around a couple of tables. Serving first Filip and Bishop, her eyes met the Mayan’s for a split second. His gaze was enough to make her want to fall to her knees and plead for forgiveness. He didn’t look angry, or even like he wanted an apology; but he did look like he had a couple of things he wanted to say – it just wasn’t the time. Once she got to Coco, he looked up at her, and winked slyly. A smile ghosted her face, and she went back behind the bar.

The bikers all sat and shared road-stories for a while, with the Mayans needing to relax and feel solid ground under their feet. Nina grabbed her cigarettes, and started for the stairs. Tig got in her way, and gave her a knowing look. “Not running… I just need a moment”, she said. She held out her little finger. “Pinky-swear”, she added. He smiled, crooked his own finger with hers, and kissed her forehead; before letting her pass, and walk down the stairs.

---

A couple of broken balloons and an unused piñata littered the floor of the ice-cream shop. She picked up the brightly-colored cardboard mule, and set it down on the counter, before getting behind it, and lighting a cigarette. Digging through the freezer, she found the strawberry-marshmallow ice-cream, and scooped a couple of spoonfuls into a bowl; immediately digging in. She sat for a while, smoking and eating the ice-cream, and stared into the dead eyes of the piñata. It was probably full of small packets of organic raisins, and Nina frowned at it; before punching it, and making it fly across the room. It broke open, and revealed bags of dried apricots. “Would have been better with condoms…”, she muttered to herself, and put some more ice-cream into her mouth.

“What did he ever do to you?”, Taza said from the doorway. Nina gulped down the frozen treat, and smiled embarrassedly. “She was full of shit…”, Nina replied. Taza chuckled, and went to sit across from her. “Got any pecan?”. She dug through the freezer again, and fixed a bowl for the VP; topping it off with some whipped cream and a bright cherry. “Dig in”, she smiled. Taza took a spoonful in his mouth, and smiled brightly. “This place sure as hell beats the scrap-yard”, he said. “Just wait until I whip out the sprinkles”, Nina grinned.

It was strange sitting there with Taza. They’d spoken when she was with the Mayans, but they hadn’t been especially close. She respected and liked him though; and knew that she would have come to care for him deeply, if she’d stayed longer in Santo Padre. “How have you been, kid?”, Taza asked. Nina couldn’t lie. “Not good”, she muttered. “All of this… I feel like shit for going back on my promise to you”. Taza raised a meaningful brow at her. “And you miss Angel”, he said. Nina nodded. “But this is how it has to be. I can’t go back to Santo Padre. It’s not safe”. “We’ll keep you safe”, Taza said. “It’s not about me”, she replied.

Tazza sighed. “I was in love once… He was my one and only; and when I lost him… I was destroyed. I threw in my patch, and gave up…”. Nina was surprised at the sudden sharing of heart. “But you’re still Mayan", she said. “This isn’t the first patch I’ve worn", Taza said. “Years ago, I rolled with Palo. I was a Vato”. “You?”, Nina askes disbelievingly. Taza gave her a soft smile. “I wasn’t always the intelligent gentleman outlaw you see before you now”. Nina let a smile ghost her face. “Well, if you were going to pick up a cut again, you chose the right patch, in my opinion”, she said, before frowning deeply. “If my opinion even matters anymore”. “It does, kid. You’ve become family to us”, Taza said. He took her hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze. "But the reason I’m telling you this, is because Angel is family as well. And he’s not doing very good right now”. A jolt of pain and fear went through Nina’s body. “What did he do?”, she whispered. “He did what I did, when I lost my Davíd…”, Taza said, and let go of her hand.

Realization struck, and Nina felt her already broken heart break even more. “He left the club?”, she croaked. Taza sighed deeply. “He came on the lot a few nights ago, drunk off his ass… He threw his cut at Bishop’s feet”, he said. “I believe his exact words were; None of this shit means shit anymore. Fuck this shit”. Nina frowned deeply. “He’s not exactly eloquent when he’s drunk, is he…?”. Taza chuckled. “No… But he was speaking from the heart. He seems to have lost his meaning to everything”, he said. “To Angel, his path with the club lead to you. When you left… that path didn’t make sense anymore”. “I didn’t want to hurt anyone else. That’s why I left”, Nina said quietly. She chewed her lips for a moment. “And I hate that he is in pain… but at least my leaving didn’t get him killed. If I’d stayed…”. “He would have died?”, Taza asked. “Not him”, Nina croaked. “Hmm”, Taza said shortly.

Before tears could reach her eyes, Nina turned around, and threw her bowl into the sink. She cleared her throat, and shook herself. “Besides, Daniella will get him back on track… In whatever way she can. She’s pretty dead-set on being in his life”. Taza frowned. “You should come upstairs; listen in on the meeting”. Nina felt a chill go through her. “What did you do?”, she croaked. “She wasn’t the snitch!”. “We know… Still; come on”. He got to his feet, gave the piñata a slight kick; and went towards the back door. Nina followed behind him; heart racing, and worried about what she was about to hear.

---

“Welcome to church!”, Filip said, as all the bikers had sat down. Nina slipped through the door as quietly as she could, and went to take her designated seat by the door. She had her own chair there, for when she was asked to join a meeting for one reason or another. It wasn’t often, but it would happen on occasion, when SAMCRO were planning to receive out of town guests, and they needed her to set up the party; or when they needed to prove to themselves how very gender-inclusive they were. She still couldn’t sit at the table though. EZ was stood next to the chair, leaning against the wall, as he had the time, she’d been called in to templo at the scrap-yard.

Filip continued. “So, you’ve come to take away our girl again”, he said. “We have, yeah”, Bishop replied. He sat at the opposite end of the table, facing Filip. The great presidents were convening. “She promised us a year, and she left after less than a month”. He shot Nina a look, and she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “Is that all? Because if it is, I’m sure we can come to some monetary agreement”, Filip said. “Nina claims it would be unsafe for her to return to San Pad. I know we agreed that we’d let you take her back there; but we’re not about to force her to go anywhere, unless we’re absolutely positive she’ll be in no danger”. “We kept Nina perfectly safe while she was with us. Any fear she felt was unfounded”, Taza said.

“You’re wrong!”. The words fell from Nina’s mouth, before she was able to stop them. “I’m sorry”, she muttered. “No, my love. Continue”, Filip said. Tig nodded encouragingly at her. “I can’t go back… It’s not about my own safety… Just, please!”, Nina pleaded. “You year is not up, and we need you at the clubhouse”, Bishop said calmly. “That’s it? You came to Charming six man strong, driving for 8 hours; just for Nina’s well served whiskey sours?”, Filip chuckled. “Might be her perky attitude”, Tig said, and looked at Nina. She grimaced at him. “Look! So cute…”. Nina desperately tried to make up a reason why she couldn’t go back to Santo Padre. Daniella would call Sala the moment she saw her; she was sure of it. Those two little boys would be dead within hours. In the end she sighed. “Ok… I’ll go with you… But not to Santo Padre. Take me somewhere else, lock me up in the dark and… sell my kidneys. I don’t care, I just can’t be seen in San Pad!”.

Bishop frowned deeply. “We’re not gonna hurt you, Nina. We care about you… But our club is in deep shit without you”. “What are you talking about?”, Quinn asked. It was one of the first times Nina had heard him speak at the table. He was still growing into his confidence as a member of SAMCRO; after his years as a nomad. Bishop looked at Nina. “Someone killed Daniella. We believe it was the Vatos Malditos”, he said. Nina gasped, and almost slid from her chair. “Oh god… Oh fuck!”, he croaked. “She was… What happened?”. “Someone let it slip to the Vatos that the woman who killed Palo’s primo was hooking up with Angel; and publicly, that was Daniella”, Hank said. Nina shot an angry look at Bishop, reminded of his master plan of making Angel treat Daniella as his old-lady. “Involved; like…?”, Rat asked. His pureness was almost too much to handle. “What, you wanna know the positions?”, Coco chuckled. “Probably doggy… reversed cowgirl… Sixty-nine…”. Nina pulled off her sneaker, and threw it at the Mayan’s head. He ducked, and narrowly escaped her attack. “That’s my sister you’re talking about”, Filip growled. “She’s a lady. Good old-fashioned missionary is more like it. Good access to the tits…”. Nina took off her other sneaker, and threw it at Filip, hitting him in the chest. “Ow!”, he exclaimed, and threw the shoe back at her. The was a rumble of chuckles around the table. “Are you done laughing at my sex-life?”, she sneered. “Fucking wannabe man-whores probably wouldn’t know a good wheelbarrow if it hit you in the face!”. “Are you sure you want her back?”, Happy chuckled. She shot him a venomous look. “What’s a wheelbarrow?”, Rat muttered. T.O. whispered in his ear, and Rat visibly blushed.

After a moment of heavy breathing, Bishop’s former words hit Nina again. “Daniella’s dead? Do you know if she talked to anyone before she did?”. “As in ratted?”, Riz said. She nodded. “She didn’t. We know she wasn’t the snitch”, Bishop said. “A couple of days after you left, Angel broke a bottle of tequila, and threatened to shove it up her infected cunt, if she didn’t talk about what she knew about you. She spilled the beans on what she’d figured out, but swore up and down your secret was safe with her”. “It was kind of sickening to watch, actually”, Riz said. “Angel was taking her home, when he was crammed between two vans on the road. One of the drivers shot Daniella in the head with a .38”, Bishop said. “Angel…?”, Nina rasped. “He’s fine… physically. His bike was pretty banged up, because one of the vans bumped in to him”, Taza said. “He managed to drive it away, but it died out about two miles from Daniella’s body”.

Nina got to her feet, and began pacing the floor. She was hyperventilating, and shaking her hands in front of her; feeling a prickling sensation under her skin. “She… made me leave”, she rasped. “Daniella made me leave”. “How, niña?”, Coco said. Nina met his serious expression, and tears began falling from her eyes. “She found out about Abel and Thomas”, she said, and looked at Filip. “She said that if I didn’t break it off with Angel, and left Santo Padre, she’d let VM know about them…”. Once again heaving for breath, EZ came over to her and pulled her into his arms. “Do you need your inhaler?”, he whispered. “No, I’m just… Fuck”, Nina replied, and let herself be enveloped in his embrace.

“That absolute gash!”, Filip roared. Nina heard something break, and turned to see that Happy had picked up his chair and slammed it against the wall; making the legs shatter into small wooden splinters. Rat got up, and found a new chair for Happy. “I’ll call SAMDINO. Make sure Nero’s farm has some security for a while”, he muttered, and slipped out of the room. Happy sat down, and Quinn patted his shoulder calmingly. Tig looked like an actual nuclear bomb had gone off inside his head, and he had murder written all over his face. “Did they bury her yet? Because I want to rape her corpse with a knife!”. “She was cremated two days ago”, Taza muttered.

“Who are Abel and Thomas?”, Riz asked. “Jackson’s sons”, Filip said, his face grim. “He sent them to Norco with his ex-wife before he died; to keep them safe from the life… Hurting them – even threatening them – is a death sentence”. “Well, VM got there ahead of you”, Bishop said. “Nina, I’m sorry that you felt the need to keep this from us. We would have helped”. “Daniella had Sala on fucking speed-dial. You wouldn’t have been able to do anything”, Nina said. She pulled out of EZ’s arms, and stepped over to the table. Without another thought, she sat down on Rat’s free chair. Filip gave her a short nod. “I was just trying to protect my nephews”. “I get that”, Bishop said. “And I hope you know that we hold no grudge against you for leaving. I just wish we’d known, so this could have been cleared up sooner”. She gave him a sad but thankful smile. “And we still need you back”, Taza said.

Rat reentered the room, and when he saw Nina in his seat, he simply got another chair, and sat down next to Coco. The Mayan gave him a crooked smile, and nodded. “Packer is on his way to Norco”, he said. “I called Nero too, and he’s on high alert. He’s gonna call in his old gang-relations. The boys are safe”. Nina sighed deeply. Abel and Thomas would be safe; she knew it. Now she just needed to know the next step for herself. “What do you need me for?”, she asked Bishop. “Well, first of all, we want our brother back at the table”, Coco said. Bishop shot him a look, which Nina couldn’t quite read. “Palo figured out Daniella wasn’t Gael’s killer either”, Bishop said. “How?”, Nina asked. “Because the snitch sent him a picture of you and Gael dancing the night of his death”.

“Fucking hell…”, Filip said, receiving agreeing groans from the rest of the table. “Does he know where Nina is?”. “No, he hasn’t linked her to SAMCRO, but he remembers her from the party”, Taza replied. “He wants us to hand you over, Nina”, Bishop said. “It’s either that, or war”. Nina let out a muffled whimper. “Well, that’s not happening”, T.O. said. “Nina is our family, and we’re not handing her over to be killed”. “And neither will we”, Bishop said. “She’s family to us too; and beyond any unwritten rule about not letting family get hurt, we don’t want her dead”. “So what are you suggesting?”, Tig asked. “Well, as you’ve probably figured out, we’ve got a snitch in our clubhouse”, Taza said. “We know it’s a woman, because Palo let it slip that she’s been in contact with him on the regular”. “We need to draw her out; get rid of her somehow”, Bishop said. “And what better way than give her to Palo, letting him think it’s Nina…?”. Nina’s eyes widened at his words. “We’ll bring Nina and the snitch to a location we’ll set up with the Vatos; show Nina to Palo; and then switch her for the snitch, last minute”. “What is this? Mission Impossible? You can’t just put a Nina’s face on a different woman…”, Tig said. “That’s your problem with this plan? You want to let another woman get killed because of me!”, Nina said. “No! I can’t spend the rest of my life looking for women to take my place in front of Palo’s gun, whenever he figures out, he killed the wrong person…! I’m done. No one else is getting hurt on my account”.

She stood up, and stormed out of the room. Filip followed her, waving at the others to wait in church. He closed the door to church, to give them some privacy. “Look, whoever this woman is, she was willing to let you get killed. For money or whatever; I don’t care”, he said. Nina went over to face the bar, and took a firm hold of the railing in front of it; as if it would keep her from exploding in rage. “I am not letting this happen. I swear on Jax’s grave, I will run back to the border on my bare fucking feet; and throw myself in front of Palo’s gun. I’m done! I can’t have another life on my conscience!”. “Nina Teller!”, Filip growled. He only ever used her full name when he meant business. “You owe your Jackson to live! He loved you and cared for you; had you take his name when he got guardianship of you, to get you out of that loveless place you called a home up until you were 16… You are his sister! If he were here, he would not let you throw away your life like this”. He put his hands on her shoulders, and forced her to look at him. “And I won’t let you either. I love you, kid! Like a sister… like a fucking daughter; and you know what that means…”. Tears were forming in his eyes, and Nina threw her arms around his waist, and buried her face in his shoulder. “I’m sorry… but I can’t let this happen. There has to be another way”, she said.

“You have to”. Nina pulled away from Filip, and saw that EZ had come out of church to join them. “If you don’t, Angel’s gonna get himself killed”. Nina shook her head confusedly. “What are you talking about?”, she asked. “Angel’s planning on crossing the border to kill Palo. He wants to keep you safe, and he thinks taking out Palo and VM will do that”, EZ said. “He won’t make it within 10 miles of Palo, before he’s dead!”, Nina exclaimed. “You’re right…”, EZ replied. “But he’s gonna do it anyway… He’s broken, Nina. Doesn’t give a fuck about himself or anything else anymore. You have to come back with us, and convince him that this plan is better than his own. He made me swear not to tell Bishop, but…”. “I’m not gonna let him hurt himself…!”, Nina exclaimed. “He’s already hurt”, EZ said. “But this is suicide”.

Nina went to sit down on a chair, feeling her knees beginning to give under her. “So… either I let someone die in my place, or Angel kills himself; is that what you’re saying?”. “It’s the only plan we have… And going through with it – keeping you alive like this – is the only way I know to keep my brother alive”, EZ said. He sat down across from her, and took her hands. “I’m begging you… For me; for our pap… Please…”. “What if he already…”, Nina began in a panicked voice. “He promised to wait until I came back. Pap is keeping an eye on him”, EZ said. “Does he know you’re here?”, Filip asked. “No. If he knew there was a chance, we’d bring Nina back, he’d shoot out the tires of all our bikes, and probably set them on fire”, EZ replied. “He thinks she’s in danger in San Pad”. He gave Filip a meaningful look. “She’s not. You’ve got my word… if that means anything coming from a prospect”.

Filip stepped over to the table, and EZ got up to face him. “What is this woman to you, prospect?”, he asked. “She’s my hermanita. My little sister… and I love her”, EZ replied. “Then your word matters, brother”, Filip said, and placed a firm hand on EZ’s shoulder. He looked at Nina. “You are getting on the back of this Mayan’s bike, and letting him take you back to Santo Padre”. “Filip, I’m…”, Nina began. “No discussions! When I saw you in San Pad, you were alive… happy, for the first time in forever. You’ve been a fucking wreck this last week; even worse than I’ve ever seen you before”, Filip said. He took her hands, and pulled her up to stand. “Relight that flame inside you, luv’. Fucking shine!”.

Her Angel was in pain, and he was going to get himself killed. Nina couldn’t let that happen; and now that she knew that Abel and Thomas were ok, she wasn’t ready to let the chance of any kind of future with him slip through her fingers. She knew that she wanted to find a way to avoid anymore death, but for now, Angel was her focus. “Tell them I’ll go”, she said. EZ sprang for the door to church, closing it behind him. She heard muttering from inside, before it opened again, and the Mayans all streamed out; the Sons at their heels. Coco came straight up to her, and pulled her in for a tight hug. “I fucking love you, ma’”, he said, and kissed her temple. Nina smiled at him, before she turned to face Bishop. “I’m sorry I left the way I did; but my reason was valid. I know you know that”, she said. “I’ll give you your year, and whatever time after that makes sense; and I’ll go ahead with your plan for now… As long as you admit that your plans have a tendency to suck!”. “Yeah, pimping out Angel was not my best move”, Bishop admitted with a smile. “We love you, kid. I love you. And I promise to do whatever I have to do to keep you safe…”. “Are you fishing for a hug?”, Nina smirked. “No, he doesn’t hu…”, EZ began. Bishop put his arms around Nina, and pulled her in for a tight embrace; taking every Mayan in the room by surprise. “Tiggy, call Lyla, and make them clear out of Nina’s place, before she comes by to get her things”, Filip said. Nina winced. “You know what? No… After what’s probably gone on there today, just burn that shit”, she said. The Sons all laughed.

Nina looked around at the faces of her Mayan family. “Let’s go home”.

---

[classysassy9791]

Fandom: Inuyasha Genre: Romance/Humor/Fluff Pairing: InuKag Rating: T

The conclusion for this little fic that has waited 6 years for completion. Hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think!

Thank you to @akitokihojo for being such a stellar beta for this fic, and helping it come to its completion. Couldn't have done it without you!

For @inukag-week Day 6: Transformation.

Part 1 l Part 2 l Part 3 l

Part 4 Word Count: 2,000

Can also be found on FFN and AO3

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It had been a very long time since Kagome had experienced a hangover.

The buzzing in her brain soon became too much to ignore as it beckoned her to consciousness. She opened her eyes to the dimly lit room. Sunlight peeking from beneath the closed curtains indicated it was daytime and she silently thanked herself for being smart enough to close them before leaving her apartment the evening before.

Kagome wrapped the duvet around herself and tried to grasp a hold on the fleeting darkness of unconsciousness. She knew nothing would cure a hangover except time, and she would rather spend it floating through dreamless sleep than deal with the repercussions head-on. Waves of nausea added to her misery and she could faintly smell whiskey with each exhale - a scent that was intoxicating last night, yet this morning it only caused her stomach to twist further.

Her phone pinged with a message, but she didn't dare even try to reach for it, the annoyingly bright glare of her phone not exactly something she wanted to sabotage herself with. As the minutes passed by, she became more acutely aware of her brain feeling like it would swell beyond the capacity of her skull, and her dehydration became too obvious to ignore. Her tongue felt like cotton as she licked her dry, cracked lips. Damn, why did the morning after always have to remind her of what a bad decision the night before was?

She squinted and finally set her gaze on her nightstand. A surprising wave of relief washed over her. Drunk Kagome must have had an intelligent moment, for on her nightstand stood a bottle of painkillers and a glass of water. As quickly as she dared, she propped herself up on one elbow, trying to ignore the slight spin of the room, before greedily popping two pills and finishing the water. Even so, her thirst was far from quenched.

As Kagome tried to sort through her memories of the night before, she quickly registered that she had no memory of coming home last night. The last, clear recollection she could come up with had her sitting at the bar with Inuyasha and sharing a shot with the bartender.

"Shit," she groaned, hanging her head before precariously pulling her legs from beneath her blanket. Blacking out from drinking had been a favorite past time of hers back in her early college days. It wasn't because she didn't know her own limits when it came to being intoxicated, but back then, she simply didn't care. Drinking had been her favorite vice when it came to dealing with the pressures of school, boyfriends, and girl drama. It had been years since she had felt the need to get obliterated so completely.

Finally finding her courage, Kagome reached over and unlocked her phone. The red battery sign at the top meant it was almost dead, so she quickly scrolled through all the alerts on her phone. There had been way too many messages and missed calls from Hojo, which triggered the memory of the picture she had sent him. Her nausea increased ten-fold. Regret was a spiteful bitch.

Hojo was going to be the afternoon's problem. Maybe even tomorrow's problem. All Kagome knew was that it wasn't going to be a now problem.

Kagome plugged in her phone and once she was on her feet, the room swayed, almost causing her to lose balance. She stumbled out into the hallway to her bathroom to relieve herself. When she finished, she washed her hands and splashed cold water on her face just to feel something refreshing. The person's face who greeted her in the mirror no longer resembled the glamorous girl of the night. Only a woman's face awash with guilt, a wrinkled set of pajamas, and hair that was far from attractive.

From the other end of the apartment, Kagome suddenly heard a key turning in her front door. Immediately, she felt panic rise in her throat, eyes going wide. No one had a key to her apartment, not even Hojo, so unless she had been robbed last night - which she very may well have considering she had very little memory of it - no one should be coming over.

She swallowed thickly against her cotton throat and grabbed the first weapon at her fingertips - a plunger. Yeah, she wasn't winning any awards for being clever, but she was hungover and scared for her life.

Kagome crept down the hallway toward the front door and nearly lost her breath at who she saw standing in her entryway. The man from the bar last night - Inuyasha? - was making his way to her kitchen with a carrier filled with coffee and a bag from her favorite breakfast joint down the block.

"Good morning," he greeted casually, not at all thrown off by her presence as he set down his packages on the counter. "I brought you breakfast."

Rage and astonishment swelled in her chest. "What the fuck are you doing in my apartment?!"

He winced and held his hands over his ears before turning to glare at her. "If you could wait until after eight in the morning to start yelling, I'd really appreciate it."

"You didn't answer my question," she seethed, wide eyes sweeping the rest of the apartment for evidence as to what exactly happened last night?!

Inuyasha studied her from across the room and laughed at her dumbfounded expression. "Did you think I was a burglar or something? What's with the plunger?"

Kagome looked down at the plunger she held in his direction like a sword, and felt a blush bloom across her cheeks. She hurriedly hid it behind her back. "W-What was I supposed to think?"

He simply rolled his eyes. "Do you want breakfast or not?"

She bit her lip, but couldn't deny the ravenous hunger eating away at her stomach. Probably half the reason why she was so nauseous. Without saying another word, she slipped back into the bathroom to put away her weapon before meeting him in the kitchen. The sweet aroma of coffee and fresh bagels greeted her. She could've kissed him all over again.

"I didn't know how you liked your coffee, so I got cream and sugar just in case."

Kagome slowly sat down in the chair across from him, watching him slather some cream cheese on his bagel and drink his black coffee. She racked her brain as to exactly why Inuyasha was in her apartment, and then flashes of the night before came rushing back, of sloppy passionate kisses and tangled sheets.

Her heart dropped to her stomach.

Inuyasha studied the array of emotions that flickered across her face while he slowly chewed his bite of bagel and then swallowed. "Kagome, how much do you remember of last night?"

She bit her lip, shameful eyes lifting to his. "Um, well…" Her gaze fell to her person, realizing she was no longer wearing the sequined black dress she had gone out in. All the evidence pointed to a girl she wanted no relation to, making decisions that were very, very regrettable.

"We didn't sleep together."

Kagome's eyes flew to Inuyasha's, his deep voice quelling her fears. "We-We didn't?"

Amber eyes watched her carefully before turning back to his bagel. "No, we didn't. I'm not the kinda guy who beds a girl when she's drunk. Not my style."

A breath Kagome didn't know she had been holding escaped her lips. She had never been the type of girl to have one-night-stands. Her friends always teased her about it, but it was something she prided herself in. Having sex with someone wasn't something she did on a whim. She wanted to know she meant more to someone than an easy lay.

Her brows furrowed as she sipped on her coffee. "If we didn't sleep together, then why are you here?" she questioned. It would've been one thing if she had woken up with a naked man in her bed and kicked him out because of sheer embarrassment. It was another thing entirely that a man she didn't sleep with would bring her breakfast in the morning.

Inuyasha shrugged. "I was too tired to get another ride home last night, so I slept on your couch."

Kagome glanced over the breakfast bar to see a blanket and pillow on her couch as evidence that it had been occupied the night before.

"You know, you probably shouldn't drink so much."

She threw him a glare. "Did I ask for your judgement?"

He shrugged. "I'm just sayin'. Letting a stranger take you home because you're too drunk isn't exactly attractive."

Kagome scoffed. "Oh, thanks for the help," she snipped sarcastically. "What would I've done without you?"

Inuyasha grinned. "Probably throw a party to celebrate my absence."

"Probably, yeah," she hotly agreed. "I would've been just fine on my own."

"Maybe."

She frowned, flashes of last night starting to come back. They had been two heartbroken strangers in a bar who found comfort in their shared misery. Under the neon flashing lights and upbeat techno music, they gravitated toward one another like moths to a flame. But by morning they had transformed; she no longer represented the alluring woman who bewitched him, and he no longer appeared as the mysterious man who captivated her.

Now, she was simply Kagome Higurashi - a woman who was dumped by her fiance and had a mile-long to-do list regarding cleaning up their frayed relationship. And he was simply Inuyasha.

Kagome inwardly cringed. She didn't even know his last name. Or what he did for work. Or anything about him really.

Just fucking great.

"Look, Inuyasha," she began, setting down her coffee. "I appreciate everything you, er, did for me, but-"

"When we're done here, we should go on a real date."

Her mouth fell open. "What?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "Why not?"

"You have got to be joking," Kagome said while shaking her head. "One-night stands are literally just for one night, and we definitely would not work out."

He grinned. "Damn. That's a quick deduction there."

Kagome blushed. "I just mean that, last night… it was great and all, but…"

"It's daytime and the whole world's changed?" Inuyasha finished for her.

She sighed and looked away. He was right. Things were different. Last night didn't happen often for her, and bringing home a guy to her apartment never happened. If it were up to her, she'd stuff last night in a box as a precious memory and then forget it ever happened.

"I'm not saying I'm over Kikyou."

Kagome met his gaze. His eyes locked onto her, and held not an ounce of mirth. He was serious about this. He wanted to see if this could become something.

"And I doubt you're over your ex-fiance," he continued. "But, last night was fun. You're different and piss me off to no end-"

"Is that supposed to be a compliment?" she asked with narrowed eyes.

He sighed and after a moment finally stood up. "Look. You seem like a great girl. But I'm not one to beg. Thanks for the couch." Slipping his phone into his back pocket, he turned to leave.

"Inuyasha, wait!" Kagome called as she chased after him.

Dammit. This guy was so infuriating! He insulted her, and called her names, and angered her enough to make her slap him upside the head. But he also made her laugh, and feel alive, and made her want to kiss him again and again.

She couldn't deny that she wanted to see him again.

Grabbing his elbow, she made him stop in his tracks and look over his shoulder at her. "What?"

"This…" she started, fumbling for the right words. "This is never going to work. You and I."

He gave her a lopsided smile. "I'll pick you up at six."

And then he was gone, closing the door behind him.

Within a moment of him leaving, Kagome realized something: Meeting Inuyasha was either going to be the best luck she ever had, or the very worst. At least, on the bright side, he had already witnessed her at her lowest.

How bad could it be?

[miekasa]

and i found them! the actual ac unit snippet was hiding with the last one, so i thought i’d just drop them both here 😅 your appreciation means the world to me 🌼

💉the broken ac unit snippet [not the previous choppy summary, but the actual snippet that was hiding with erwintholomew’s]

it’s summer—dry heat, humidity, and warm winds all around. oc has been working in the outdoor makeshift hospital for her month’s rotation shift. tents of covid cases have been overflowing. it’s patient after patient, and she’s in PPE—full-on hazmat suit for 8 hours (sometimes more). food and water breaks between shifts aren’t feasible because they’re saving suits, bathroom breaks are timed before or after she suits up. it was literally hell.

levi’s been noticing his roomie coming home even more exhausted than usual. sometimes, she just goes to the kitchen and drinks down two glasses of water before heading for a nap. he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t worried. she looked like she’s lost a bit of weight. she was always a little paler and seemed to be wilted these days. he’s been trying to quietly shoulder a bit more of her chores, but he’s also pretty amazed at how she manages to keep up.

it was on a saturday afternoon when he found out. he had work and errands to run and some packages to send to his mom. he knocks on his roomie’s door to ask if she wanted him to do anything for her. he’s willing to do her groceries or make her dinner if it meant seeing her eat something other than instant ramen or a peanut butter sandwich. her muffled voice bids him to come in.

oc: oh heya

she gives him a tired wave. she’s sitting on her bed, reading something on her tablet. the first thing levi notices is that it’s way too fucking hot. her room is neat with a bit of a mess, a few notebooks strewn around her bed and a shirt hanging on the study chair, but obviously clean. the fan she has turned on was doing nothing to alleviate the heat though.

levi: you know you can turn your ac up in this heat right?

oc gives a tired chuckle at that.

oc: it’s been broken for a few weeks, but don’t worry! i already got a new one

levi is pretty speechless, considering that the heat wave has only been getting worse for the past month. she points to the unopened giant box crowding the space by her work desk.

oc: work’s just been exhausti—busy lately, but i’ll get around to it. i just need to switch them out and take the old one to recycling downstairs.

levi honestly doesn’t have anything to say to that because what the hell—

oc: did you need something?

he snaps out of it.

levi: i’m—i’m going out for errands. want me to get you anything?

oc: oh, are you passing by the pharmacy?

he wasn’t planning on it, but levi nods.

oc: yeah hang on, lemme just write the prescription for my pills. thank you!

levi shuts her door and speedwalks to his room. he knows he’s being irrational, and he knows that it isn’t his fault but fuck, she’s been living like that for weeks on top of all her work. he turns up his ac unit, rolls down his blinds, and fluffs the pillows on his bed before pulling the covers down. he knows that he could offer the suggestion of sleeping on the couch in their living room (they had an ac unit there after all), but no. she deserves better than that.

when levi walks back to her room, oc’s head peeps out of the door.

oc: here, i just need three boxes and i can cashapp you the payment.

levi grunts, taking the prescription and folding it into his pocket.

levi: come with me.

oc is pretty taken aback at his gruff tone, and she wonders what’s gotten him in a twist. she’s on the verge of passing out because work has been brutal and she has a golden weekend, so she was planning to catch up on a lot of rest. she follows quietly, wanting to quickly resolve whatever this was. her roomie’s always been a little...weird. it gets weirder when she realizes that he’s leading her to his room. cold air hits her when he opens the door and ushers her in, and she feels reborn.

levi: you can rest here for now

oc’s eyes widen at that. they’ve been roomies for over a year now, and respecting personal spaces has always been a huge factor contributing to their civil harmony as roommates.

oc: levi, it’s fine! i can’t, really! i don’t want to intrude, and besides, it’s fine, i—i’ve been alright anywa—

she’s cut off when he starts nudging (pushing) her towards the bed.

levi: seriously, i’ll be out the whole afternoon.

her but’s and what-if’s and i’m-fine’s fall on deaf ears. her roomie maneuvers her expertly and practically trips her to make her fall onto the bed. when her back hits the soft mattress, she feels a wave of fatigue hit. then he’s guiding her head towards the pillows while she mumbles about feeling like she’s overstepping, but levi’s room was cold and comfortable. the bed was a cloud, cool and soft and dragging her further into sleep. she feels the covers pulled up around her shoulders, and darkness claims her.

levi leaves quietly after shutting down the fan in her room. his afternoon is spent running some on-the-ground tasks for projects for work and personal errands. he does take an impromptu trip to the old deli near their place to buy some cuts of beef and a cheap bottle of red wine for a stew. he wonders if he’s breaching boundaries, but he makes an impulsive decision for once. he’ll drag her to dinner if he has to, she looks like she hasn’t had a decent meal in days. when he gets home, it’s late afternoon, but the sun was still up in all its scorching heat. he disinfects the goods thoroughly before heading for a shower himself. oc is still sleeping soundly when he checks in on her [levi thoughts: good, she really fucking needs it]. he goes into her room and replaces her broken ac unit, easily installing the new one and padding up the sides tightly. he brings the old one down before sweeping up the dust in her room that has settled from his handiwork. he turns it on to test it, and her room cools in minutes. satisfied, he leaves the ac unit on and starts dinner.

oc comes to slowly, mind still clouded and heavy from sleep. everything around her is blurry and she’s engulfed in softness smelling of black tea and spearmint. the realization of where she is hits like a freight train and this wakes her right up. the time on the clock by the bed says it’s almost half-past seven, and oc panics. she’s overstepped, her roomie’s gonna be pissed, and oh god, she didn’t mean to take that long of a nap. she practically runs out of his room. levi is setting two places at their table when she dashes in. a pot of stew was simmering on the stove. he looks up and just points to her meds.

levi: it’s already been disinfected.

oc opens her mouth for what was going to be a long apology when levi interrupts her before she even begins.

levi: i also installed your new ac unit. the broken one’s already at recycling.

oc’s eyes widen and she can feel tears welling up because it’s been weeks of exhaustion and uncomfortable hot nights and she’s been trying to find enough strength to do that and—

levi goes tomato-red when his roomie launches herself at him and wraps her arms around his shoulders tightly. he can hear her voice quivering, tone hovering on about-to-blubber-and-cry, repeatedly thanking him and apologizing for overstepping and he kind of just stands there for a moment. he pats her back awkwardly, wondering how to respond to her and decides to keep quiet and let her break the hug first. she might actually cry if he pushes her away.

oc lets him go gently, a little embarrassed at her outburst but she gives him a small smile and mutters a soft “sorry.”

levi: cut the apologies, brat. i offered. it’d be inhumane to let you sleep in that heat.

oc is about to argue when he fixes her with a glare that makes her sigh. she presses her palms into her cheeks in resignation.

levi: come on, i made dinner. you really need to eat something other than synthetic garbage and peanut butter.

oc sniffles and giggles. levi sets the food down and takes a seat beside her. he freezes when she grasps his hand.

oc: really, levi, thank you

levi shrugs (absolutely melting at her smile). he doles out servings of stew and rice, and they have a quiet dinner.

💉erwin’s own private gym in his penthouse snippet [in which erwin’s not even in this snippet, but he and his gym are catalysts of sorts]

it’s a rare occurrence that oc wakes before noon on her days off. so when she bumbles into the kitchen at 7am, craving for some tea and the little tiramisu her patient from work gave her, she bumps into levi. levi—also fresh out bed and only clad in boxer shorts. plaid dark pink ones that did wonders for his ass.

oc, completely forgetting that she’s in an oversized shirt that goes past her shorts and that her hair is a mess, stops mid-stride. her jaw drops. levi is built. not to any extreme body-builder kind to any extent. but he was fit and holy fuck his back alone was oh wow. yeah, she’s awake. levi turns at the sound of footsteps and has to suppress his smirk because oc’s appraisal was very very distracting, affirming, and ego-boosting. he thinks his roomie doesn’t even realize she is gawking [levi thoughts: she looks way too fucking cute and soft for someone half dead from a toxic shift yesterday and he wants to run his hands through her hair and knead the knots out of her shoulders and feel those legs—].

he truly has to hold in his laughter when oc literally goes “what the fuck” while waving around her hands gesturing to his abs and pecs. oc squints in the midst of her appraisal.

oc: how do you maintain all that in a pandemic??

levi sets down another mug and pours out more tea while explaining that erwin, who lives in the penthouse suite of the complex, has his own home gym. levi, hange, and moblit have exclusive access to it because they’re friends, they live in the same complex, they all work from home plus they clean up and help him maintain it.

levi: it’s a lot safer than public gyms.

oc is still chewing on this information while now blatantly staring at his thighs.

levi: i’m pretty sure erwin will let you use it too if you’re looking for someplace to work out. i can ask him if you want.

he adds some milk to her tea before walking over to oc and handing her a steaming mug of chai. he does this on purpose just to get a reaction out of her because he is absolutely basking in this. she is usually very composed and almost nothing fazes her, and he thinks he’s never seen her flush this deep. oc snaps out of it as she thanks him for the tea. she just nods, her eyes a little glazed over and unfocused.

oc: oh, th—that’s nice. i’ll think about it.

she primly grabs her tiramisu and walks back to her room, leaving levi smirking in their kitchen. she has thoughts that need processing.

oc thoughts: erwin happens to be filthy rich and roomie-free and can afford a penthouse. he dedicated a room in his penthouse to a fully-equipped gym. this is some really good chai. she pretty much stared at her roomie, with his knowledge, very disrespectfully at seven in the morning. her roommate is hot. pretty. cute. sexy. his voice—how has she never noticed? arms? abs? those thighs?? all of the above??? anyway, that v down his hips, his chest—yeah, her vibrator’s batteries die that night, and she’ll have to remember to get new ones after work. this is very for her, very bad indeed.

this was the h-word snippet 🥵 LMAO i had to give oc a little something because this isn’t one-sided after all 😌

SDKJSGHLF;DS ANON YOU’RE OUT OF YOUR MIND YOU’RE A LITTLE GENIUS YOU KNOW THAT!!! INCREDIBLE!!

when levi walks back to her room, oc’s head peeps out of the door.

oc: here, i just need three boxes and i can cashapp you the payment.

levi grunts, taking the prescription and folding it into his pocket.

levi: come with me.

THIS PART!! IS SO LEVI!! I’M OBSESSED!! I’m obsessed with the whole concept of him just... affectionately forcing her to nap in his room because it’s the least he can do to help ease her pain, and show that he cares; but this right here!! The way he had no intentions of going to the pharmacy, but is going to help her out anyway!! Begrudgingly taking the perscription, and immediately changing the subject away from the topic of her paying him back!! So good!! (And why do I get the feeling that he never accepted her cashapp lmaooo). 

oc is about to argue when he fixes her with a glare that makes her sigh. she presses her palms into her cheeks in resignation.

levi: come on, i made dinner. you really need to eat something other than synthetic garbage and peanut butter.

oc sniffles and giggles. levi sets the food down and takes a seat beside her. he freezes when she grasps his hand.

oc: really, levi, thank you

levi shrugs (absolutely melting at her smile).

ALSO HERE!! I don’t know I don’t know I don’t know but the casual insulting her dinners lmaoo only to help her out; it’s the showing affection without outright saying it’s affection that’s so GOOD!! I’M OBSESSED!!

AND THE WHOLE GYM SEQUENCE!! YEAAAAAAAAAAAAH!! LOVE LEVI BEING JUST A LITTLE COCKY!! GOOD FOR HIM!! HE’S ATTRACTIVE!! HE SHOULD KNOW IT!! PLS but oc being just a little shameless and telling him how good he looks and just staring without feeling guilty LMFAOO GOOD FOR HER TOO!! GOOD FOR THEM!!

[gammacousin]

Okay. I’m ready to real talk Black Widow. I don’t want to but as an activist there’s an obligation I have to share and educate. I nerd to forget but I suppose it shows the power of this movie if it brings something real into the light.

*Spoiler Warning. Trigger warning for everything.*

There are some things I want to say that could potentially spoil aspect of the Black Widow film. I also would advise you to skip this post if you have a darker past, if you aren’t interested in getting serious, or wish to skim by, I’m sincerely not judging! I come on here to avoid the universe as well. You do you, I totally still love you if you don’t read this and want to move onto something nerdy or more fun. This isn’t the post for you.

It’s taken me a while to process and organize my thoughts. Skip if you don’t want to hear deep, raw stories.

3

2

Okay. Nerd review first.

The level of girl power and any and all glass ceilings… There is SO much left to do. So much that needs to still be addressed. But seeing 3 women run this show: Yelena, Natasha, and Melina was an absolute joy to observe. This isn’t the end of some hard waged war, it’s the beginning and I beg you; Disney/Marvel. Please give us more of this? It’s so important for young girls to see other girls kicking butt and winning. Quick summary of nerd feelings; Losing Nat still burns. Yelena is a boss.

Okay…Real talk.

I have to get a little deeper here now. My personal story absolutely played into how I felt about this film and I wish I saw some trigger warnings about the material covered. Do I know Black Window’s story? Yes. In and out. I can read it, I can write my FF on it. However. Little to no one knows my story and so absolutely no one is to blame for not warning me. I was not expecting to come out this shook.

I’m sharing this because it’s happening now, today. In the real world. I doubt the film makers had this mind over other social issues, but after feeling like it’s irrelevant, that my pain is somehow less than, I’m realizing through my activism it’s not.

I grew up in a cult where women are not relevant. You matter up to a point. You are useful, to a point. If you’re giving 24/7, you’re not giving enough. If you’re not smiling as you’re doing cult stuff, you’re complacent. In addition to why I’m about to share, my house growing up was not a safe space which is a story for another time. So it’s a stack…this janga-ish game that eventually just comes crashing down.

My trigger started moments after the film started the handing over of the kids. When Alexei chooses the job over the welfare of the girls. Alexei put his two “daughters” in danger to save ‘face’. To put the job ahead of two children…it hit home. In the group I’m from, fathers, mothers, grandparents, siblings will absolutely choose the group over blood. You are nothing and you mean nothing if you ‘defect’. If you break a rule. If you complain. If you say ‘no’. If you put in a bad review for a leader, if you have anything bad at all to say about the organization as a whole. You can confide something deep in someone you trust and it absolutely will come back to hurt you.

The title song shook me completely. This collage of video and images of brainwashing, treating these girls like absolute objects is disgusting in itself. But when you’re raised in this other world, there’s a level of brainwashing that is absolutely unmatched. Videos, books, quizzes, 12 hour lectures, weekly meetings.

People are unified to the point where you lose your own identity. There’s a language- a literally language- words you start to misuse. Verbiage only people in the cult use. Kids of any age will watch any rated film. Frequently the themes are about obedience and or cooperation and the consequences if you do not cooperate/obey. Death is a such a common theme that either you become petrified of your own shadow, petrified of breathing wrong, or turn completely numb. In sharing these videos, the goal is to instill this fear that you will never be enough. That you will die- turn into a charred hot dog of a figure if you do not obey 8 white men - the leaders, in New York. That your friends, classmates, neighbors, family will die if they don’t believe what you do. That you’re held accountable if you can’t bring them to your side.

The song for the credits hit me. I cannot listen to it. I have no idea what it was about.

When I watched the film, I couldn’t focus at this point at gosh barely 15 minutes in. I had already checked out. I heard keywords. “Entertainers,” “I feel stupid and contagious…”

In my world, I did not matter. What mattered was, what was presented to the public. To your group. Meeting some checklist of this perfect family at any cost. You’re not an individual, you’re a number. Literally. Your records are documented by men in the back room- your actions, your track record. But ultimately? You’re part of a numeral equation reported to headquarters. And if you’re a woman, you do not have a say in how you look, dress, act or in what you say. You are as the title song says, …“Entertainers”. You smile. You do your job, and you are ‘happy’ about it. Your job is to dedicate x amount of hours cleaning the room you gather in, and in recruitment of other members…

There’s a ‘job’ in the cult called a “pioneer”. Okay. No, we might not have been trained assassins. But you are trained to manipulate emotionally. To prey on the weak. You get books, magazines, movies, speeches, lectures- you rarely get a free Saturday. Oh and the job isn’t paid. So make sure you’re working (part time because full time secular work isn’t acceptable) at a desk job (because college and getting an education is not allowed). Don’t make friends with the people who work with you, they’re out to get you. Back at the club; You answer questions like it’s some schoolastic quiz every week and quote what your reading. It’s a brainwashing tactic. If you say something enough times, you remember it. You start to believe it. You spend hours reading these things, training… Your job is to target people who have lost- and have lost a lot because they’re vulnerable. You learn to go to cemeteries, and literally stalk people who are grieving. Like Val. If you can catch someone when they’re weak, senses are dulled. They’re desperate. And you bait them with this false promise. This idea that all THEY have to do is change all that they are, join you, and they’ll see their dead loved ones again. That they are doomed if they don’t change. Most pioneers draft 2-4 people per lifetime. If you’re a great saleswoman, you can draft more into this horrific world. And I regret the hours I spent lying, torturing people. For some cult that doesn’t give two cents about me.

I 100% believed of I didn’t convince my classmates, neighbors, to join my side they would either turn me in or they would be killed by a divine being. From 2 years old I was supposedly handing out pamphlets. The doom is not a quick painless death, no. You have visuals. You have men getting up to talk in detail about what your ‘friends’ will look like as corpses. Visually descriptive to the point where I still feel a bit numb to it all. That you will have to bury their bodies after the whole divine destruction. That you will have to “clean up” the earth. You are numb- convinced- bullied to the point where you believe this is true.

If you’re hurt as MANY WOMEN AND CHILDREN ARE, and you don’t have two people to testify and say they saw it- it never happened. Abuse is the norm. And if you speak up about it? You’re called a liar. Your friends cut you off. They think you’ll die along with everyone else if you put in a ‘bad review’ or leave. You’re bullied into submission and taught from a young age that you are not in control of your own decisions. You relinquish yourself under the pretense that the men you have such reverence toward are under some divine being’s control.

Your parents hurting you is acceptable. And don’t you dare speak against your father if he’s deeply involved. Don’t even think about approaching if he’s on a phone call. If you’re hit you take it- because you “deserved” it. And you smile. You shove that pain deep down. You hide the bruise, the cut lip, the depression, the bottles of pills you’re swallowing the whatever….You’re screwed if you faint, throw up, pass out, because you’ve missed a meeting. You better be dying for that to happen…

The idea that is portrayed in the movie (IMO) is that you can forgive family who hurts you. I see people forgiving Alexei and what’s her name. Look- that’s great. It’s a fun film. Alexei is funny. Here’s what I saw; it’s a toxic man- nay- father who can’t accept responsibility. He takes pride in what the girls have become- monsters. Not in who they are at their core. He has no idea who they are. And the mom has this photo album…I’m tearing up. She remembers this a certain way, a wishful thought. I’ve confronted my own mother about our past and had an album thrown at me, “We were happy. You were happy.” The fact is I was told the smile. You’re forcing this perception that everything was normal. That it’s okay to go back. (I’m not taking away Yelena’s view that everything was real to her, that’s fine for the sake of the story, and sweet. The moment between her and Alexei..fine. Milena turns and takes their side at the end, great.) The problem with how I saw this, is that’s not how the real world works. I don’t owe my parents forgiveness when I didn’t mean shit to them. When people leave the cult they’re cut off. Treated like they’re dead. I didn’t find these moments cute, I found them horrific. Hugging me, saying he’s proud of me is the toxic sh** my father would pull. Ignoring the holes in the wall, in my skull, the phony impression he gives to the rest of the group. Hugging me…after sweeping everything he did not only to me, but countless others under the rug because the cult…because 8 men in NY will protect him. Legally. Or otherwise.

I don’t need to forgive my parents. If you’ve been mistreated, you don’t owe anyone anything. They can “try” to do the right thing, that doesn’t somehow block out years of mistreatment. Years of trauma. Sheetrock only patches the surface of the broken walls. Wounds heal but some scars stay with you forever. Metaphorically or otherwise.

‘Entertainers’ was a trigger word because if you’re high enough in the ranking system you’re asked to “testify” or share a story. It’s in front of a couple thousand. It’s an “honor”. What it really is, is a three ring circus. You will only see women on the sidelines reading from the cards while only men stand at the main podium. They’re reading what they have told them to say. Stories are manipulated, cut, changed to fit a narrative that better suits the group of a couple thousand members.

Dreykov. I hate this. But I have to go there. I’m neck deep already, might as well. I think the worst part of all of it is that you can’t touch the person who made you this way. Those 6-7-8 leaders are untouchable. It doesn’t matter what you try. What legal entities, ex groups have tried. There’s a term for us and we are considered ‘mentally diseased.’ Members are told to avoid us. And in case you were curious, no, they can’t just break their nose on a table to be free- if only it were that simple. Gosh that got me. I would cut a limb, split my skull open, if it meant I could just cut a chord. It takes years of therapy and I still have nightmares. Urges to just, go. I’m OKAY. But most escapees are not. If you manage to escape with your life and don’t end it because the pressure, guilt, abuse that comes with leaving is too much. (This is sadly the fate of MANY LBGTQ+ members.)

The only hope is either the group eventually runs out of money or they’re taken down legally. Both of which are impossible since many older members will leave all they have to the group rather than to their family. It’s a complex billion dollar publishing company that plays monopoly with people’s investments, homes, and lives.

If you speak up, you’re the liar. So you cannot free your friends, who have turned on you, already cut you off, and discarded you the day you walked out and didn’t come back.

Watching Natasha, and Yelena free their sisters made me think of every woman who is stuck in this cult. For every woman, child, currently being sexually/physically abused and can’t say sh** because they literally believe god will kill them. If I say anything to them, they block me. If I expose what’s happening they will lie in court. That’s what is happening. And it’s not in the news, it’s not talked about. Because you can’t. You’re forced into silence. There’s a block. A literal legal force field that you cannot penetrate. They have their own lawyers. You can’t break into it. You’ll lose every, single, legal battle you try to fight.

Was this a decent movie? Yes. Was I expecting to share this days after release, no. I’ve been forced into silence for so long, told that people have it far worse and that I shouldn’t talk about it. But just today I saw a grown ass couple in an escapee group, talking about how one trigger word sent them into a depressive spiral. Wondering if some god damn lightening will come out of the sky and knock them dead. And we frickin struggle in silence. People will just shrug and go “oh it can’t be that bad,” while my gay best friend can’t catch an effing break. While someone else suffers at home because god wants it that way. Someone else will bury their kid today, maybe not even hold a funeral for them if they were ‘mentally diseased.’

For people like that couple I met today, like me, if you don’t just see a fun film but a darker past or maybe it’s brought up some memories for you, I’d honestly love to chat!!! Message me! I feel like for as painful as this is to hash out not too many people know about what goes on behind a group of smiling, well dressed woman who come knocking on your door. “It’s just a religion.”

I guess I didn’t realize…the criminal aspect of what happened to me. You’re so ingrained to keep quiet. To smile. To ignore, to suppress. I can smile, joke laugh, but visualizing…inadvertently seeing this mirror was so unbelievably uncomfortable. I would always rather help someone else because it takes me out of my head. Live in a bubble where I can call my trauma a ‘fantasy’. What’s real is when someone like me has a bad day? Lol! Look, my husband literally checks his phone to make sure a conversation never touches a couple hundred trigger words that will absolutely send me into the closet with a gallon of ice cream or a bottle of whiskey. I can’t imagine what someone else, what some other traumatized individual goes through. (Maybe that’s why the Bucky stuff makes me all angry She-Hulk too..)

Look, talking people ex members of this group, out of suicide is a daily endeavor to the point where it’s borderline on autopilot. But having this, I suppose, brilliant, piece of cinema turn the camera around left me raw and writhing and angry. Not for me, but for everyone else still stuck. With every year you spend in that cult, add ten more to therapy.

If you feel like me at all, you’re not alone. Not anymore. We were raised to feel alone in the world. That the universe is somehow out to get us and that’s simply not true. You don’t need the people who raised you if they were absolute shit bags. And you DO NOT have to forgive them for keeping you in that environment. Family isn’t family if they’ve hurt you. You owe them nothing. It is healthy to feel your feelings (and you and your feelings are valid. )

Anyways! I hope to be able to talk about more fun Marvel topics soon. But this felt important so thanks for listening. I’m really not hating guys, this is just…it’s heavy. And I beg you to do your research into cults and to help out where you can.

Love and light,

-M

[honey-dewey]

(Hold me Closer) Tiny Dancer

Chapter 2

Pairing: Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels/Reader

Word Count: 1,293

Fic Warnings: Non-sexual age regression, split perspective, classification AU, canon-typical violence

Chapter Warnings: none? 

Taglist: None for this fic. If you want to be added, just ask, but I know this is an odd topic and therefore will not tag anyone unless they ask

Jack’s not exactly the most stable human being on the planet, but when he tests as a Caregiver, all hell breaks loose as someone who was just his work partner suddenly becomes so much more.

Multi-chapter story. Chapter 2 of ? Read Chapter 1 Here

-Whiskey- Two days later, Jack was sitting through the new recruits initiation. As each recruit came through the door and earned their name, Ginger texted him about each one through his glasses. 

That one’s a flirt. You two should get along.

Jack snorted under his breath as Agent Gin was given his name. 

She’s a sweetheart. Young too. Barely 25. 

Agent Jägermeister sat across from Jack, nodding to him. He nodded back. 

The final recruit came through the door, and Jack’s breath hitched in his throat. 

That’s the Little.

“And finally,” Champ handed the newest agent their hat. “Agent Mojito.” 

Agent Mojito sat next to Jack, on his left. He gave them a small nudge. “Welcome to Statesman.” 

Mojito smiled a tiny smile and nodded their thanks. 

Jack eyed Champ, who shrugged, as if reading his mind. 

Standing, Jack held a hand out to Mojito. “Why don’t I show you ‘round. Being new here, it’s a bit of a maze.” 

Mojito stood, brushing their shirt off. “Thank you,” they said. “But I have an appointment with Ms. Ginger. I’m sure I’ll see you around Mr. Whiskey.” 

And just like that, Jack was left alone in the conference room, wondering exactly how this would all shake out in the end. 

-Mojito-

To say you were nervous about working at Statesman was an understatement. You had passed each and every test with flying colors, completely shattering the last marksman record. However, the only hitch had been your classification. Ginger had pronounced you Little, a fact you already knew. She’d seemed nervous upon telling you Statesman had no Little agents, and you’d pretty much resigned yourself to failure then and there. 

But apparently Champ saw something in you, because he insisted upon you being a recruit. This meant earning your hat, glasses, and name. 

Agent Mojito. 

Heading down towards the lab, you met with Ginger, who was waiting in the consultation room. You slid into a chair, nerves bundling in your stomach. 

“So,” Ginger passed a few papers your way. “Those are prescription forms. Check all the data over and then sign at the bottom. Once you’ve done that, we can talk about your pills.” 

You signed with ease, and once you handed Ginger back the papers, she pulled out an orange bottle. “Strongest dose I can give someone of your size. Take one in the morning, preferably with food. They’re 24 hour, so you only need one a day. This bottle has thirty pills, come back when you get down to five and I’ll authorize a refill. Everything is written on the side of the bottle, so don’t worry about remembering it.” She handed you a plastic card. “That will get you access to the lab, where I will refill your pills.” 

You nodded, putting the pills in your pocket. “What if I miss one?” 

“One should be fine,” Ginger reassured. “But if you miss more than one, then you could possibly crash. So I suggest you keep those safe. And if you go on any missions, be sure to plan ahead with refills. If you want to drop during weekends to relax or not put too much pressure on your body, not taking your pills from Friday to Monday will work. Just be sure to take a pill Monday morning, or else all hell may break loose.” 

Again, you nodded. 

Ginger stood. “That should be all,” she said. “Why don’t I show you out. Statesman headquarters are a bit of a maze.” 

“That’s what Agent Whiskey said,” you remembered softly. “He’s nice.” 

“Huge flirt,” Ginger said with a shrug. “Just mind yourself around him, and it should be fine.” 

You two walked out together, Ginger smiling at you. “I can’t wait to work with you, Agent Mojito.” 

Smiling, you got into your car, heading towards your small apartment. Today had been one hell of an experience, and you couldn’t wait to get some sleep. 

----

Your first official day at Statesman was a disaster. 

Well, it wasn’t actually a disaster. It just seemed like one. 

You took your pill during breakfast in the cafeteria, sitting alone with a book. However, your glasses pinged before you could even finish your chapter. 

Champ wants you down at the shooting range. Seems important.

Sighing, you pocketed your book and picked up your travel mug of coffee. Today was already shaping up to be very interesting. 

The shooting range was easy enough to find, and before you knew it, you were face to face with Whiskey once more. 

“Fancy seein’ you here,” he said in that thick southern drawl you found surprisingly interesting. “I suppose you’re responsible for breakin’ my shootin’ record.” 

You smirked, confidence welling in your chest. “I suppose I am.” 

Whiskey whistled. “Well. Let’s see it then. Champ wants to know what you got. And honestly, so do I.” 

You nodded, picking up your weapons of choice. Two beautiful custom flintlock pistols. They were Kingsman guns, a gift from your neighbors across the pond. Both were fitted with technological advances that were appropriate for someone of your status. The right pistol shot regular bullets. You could reliably get six shots out before needing to reload, and the actual flint mechanism was automatic, unless you turned it to manual. The left pistol shot specialized bullets. Electric, tracker, exploding, If Statesman made it, you could shoot it. The left pistol could also, in a pinch, be loaded with regular bullets, just as it was right now. 

“Target?” You asked sweetly, watching Whiskey pick up his revolvers. 

Whiskey pointed down towards the far end of the range. “Those seven dummies in blue.” 

You nodded. You took some time lining yourself up on the red X taped to the floor, and when you were ready, you wiggled your stance a tiny bit more, raised your guns, and fired. 

Whiskey blinked as the seven shots rang out in such quick succession he didn’t even have time to count them. All of the dummies had perfect bullet holes through them, each and every one shot with deadly accuracy. 

“Fuck,” he breathed. “Forget what Champ said. That hat was well earned. I ain’t even gonna try.” 

You let out a breath, turning to face Whiskey. “Why thank you,” you said, calm as ever on the outside. On the inside, you were giddy with pride. 

That giddiness died at lunchtime. 

“Agent Mojito.” Champ approached your lunch table, and you looked up from your book. “I saw your shooting results. Heard about ‘em too. It seems we have a new best sharpshooter.” 

You nodded, smiling. “Thank you.” 

“That’s why I’m not hesitant about sending you on your first mission.” 

Shit. 

“With all due respect,” you said slowly. “Am I really ready?” 

Champ raised his eyebrows. “Why don’t you tell me.” 

Eventually, you agreed, and Champ handed you the file of information for the mission. Instead of reading your book, you ate your lunch and poured over the papers you’d been given, tucking the file under your arm to report to Champ’s office once you’d finished eating. You had a partner on the job, but the file didn’t mention who. It simply said a senior agent and a new recruit. 

You entered Champ’s office after knocking three times, suddenly filled with nerves. 

“Come in.” 

“Sorry I’m late,” you apologized softly, opening the door. “I got a bit lost.” 

Champ smiled. “It’s all good,” he said. “Why don’t you say hello to your partner for this mission.” 

You turned to the other side of the room, veins running cold upon seeing the other agent sprawled in an armchair. 

Agent Whiskey stood, adjusting his hat and nodding to you with a smirk. “Well this is gonna be interesting.” 

Blinking, you softly agreed with him. “Yes. I believe it will be.”