#also listening to euclid by sleep token inspired a lot of this

[pararennial-archived]

*‵ ･ comets & cicadas ･ ′

There is something chilling about Benjamin Banneker's poetic assessment of cicadas and their likeness to comets. Excerpts of the analogy flash occasionally in her mind, like sepia-toned memories playing beneath closed eyes.

"... but they, like the comets, make but a short stay with us..."

She is on the rooftop, knees tucked against her chest while her eyes scan the night sky. The soft purple of dusk clings to the edge of where land meets the heavens before surrendering to the inky dark of night's domain. Constellations are captured within cobalt depths, mapping out pieces of her history ⏤ transmission signals between past and present. The line of communication is not apparent, but it's there is dialogue in the form of thin wires suspended within the atmosphere, wavering to and fro like waves. Eventually these strings start to tighten, she feels it pull within her. She cannot stay where she is for long. Something calls.

"... their lives are short, they are merry. they begin to sing or make a noise from first they come out of the earth till they die..."

When a butterfly emerges from its chrysalis, it is rebirth. It rises from the broken rind of its former life anew. From beneath, when gold emerges in the form of cracks along her skin, is this something new? Or something she forced herself to bury like some unknown precious mineral? Or something she lets sleep, dormant until it can't any longer and emerges out screaming?

She remembers how it burned when ichor overtakes blood ⏤ striking lightning, forming roots and branches out of gold ( is it no coincidence that they all look the same, as though Nature intended it? ). That was before it became as natural as a snake shedding its skin. She doesn't know what to make of it, and thus, she lets herself soar, as above, but tethered, so below.

"... the hindermost part rots off, but it does not appear to be any pain to them..."

Flowers, fungi, or bones. It's hard to determine on weathered marble bas-reliefs of women reverently holding the potential aforementioned aloft, bewitching many scholars alike. However, what still remains to be translated are the mysteries of which the ephemeral incessantly reoccurs, like a once-bare branch exalted in bloom in spring after winter. Perhaps incessant isn't quite the right world, but rather, inevitable.

Roxanne would have to guess that inevitability extends to cicadas having to dig their way past mulching petals, mycelium, and hollowed, splintered bone to breach the surface only for a short taste of freedom and merrimaking before they too, must return to the earth rotting away. She would also figure that it goes the same for comet tails pinching off and dissipating into the void of space when they return for their short, appointed hour in dramatic fashion. One would think borrowed time is a sad waste... a loss, but no, it's a small victory. At least to her it is. It doesn't hurt anymore.

"... for they continue on singing till they die..."

For now, she can celebrate what she leaves behind in the wake of the days she mourned what she thought she lost. She feels there is no sense of feeling the weight of being so disproportionate to the rest of the world, like an incorrect measurement of whatever this is. Bearing the burden of ancient ills on her shoulders and carrying out good will in the creases of her palms felt normal to her, at least now she thinks it should... while relieved, at times she wonders if such serenity in embracing this is as limited as the lives of comets and cicadas.

The soft cool of the summer evening and the chirping of crickets ground her again, edges of roof tiles softly digging into her legs to remind her that such familiarity is still to be found. Her neck starts to strain from her fervently staring past the Moon's pale face to the stars twinkling beyond. Message received. The wires run slack and she finds her way down with ease, pulling imaginary wavelengths close to her heart. This is something new.

[rangerbeads]

ficwip

fic writer asks

What’s something new that you tried in a fic this year? How did it turn out and would you do it again? - I broke up my multi-chapters into one-shots and shorter fics. It worked out so far! Makes it much easier to work on.

How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!) - Five. Four are published, I've got the fifth one almost ready to go. I'm hoping to have it finished before the new year, but it's... long now.

What’s something you learned about yourself as a writer? - I am really drawn to damaged characters, I like to explore them and try and bring them some peace and healing. While also doing that writer thing and poking them with a stick.

What piece of media inspired you the most? - Hannibal the TV series. That will become readily apparent later.

What fandom(s) did you write for this year? - Marvel (Blackhill) and Harry Potter (Fleurmione)

What ship(s) captured your heart? - Fleurmione!

What character(s) captured your heart? - Listen, I didn't know I liked Hermione Granger, at all. It was very surprising to all of us.

Did you write for a new fandom or ship this year? - Yes, see above. Harry Potter and Fleurmione. I even joined a Discord server!

What fic meant the most to you to write? - Ooof. It's probably still Red Sorrow, but Life Signs is really fun.

What fic made you feel the happiest to work on? - Wash Out The Salt From My Hands and this Christmas fic "My Arms Are Open" that I'm still working on.

What fic was the most satisfying to finish writing? - Red Sorrow, for sure. It's so long and I'm really proud of it.

What fic was the most difficult to write? Did you finish it? - Red Sorrow was probably the most difficult, because it's time consuming and is requiring a lot of editing work. Life Signs is also difficult, though, because it's in a new area for me.

What fic was the easiest to write? - Wash Out The Salt From My Hands.

What were your shortest and longest fics this year? - There Is Something Beneath is the shortest, Red Sorrow is easily the longest.

Rec a fic you wrote or posted in 2023 - Red Sorrow for Blackhill. Life Signs for Fleurmione.

What were you go-to writing songs? - According to Apple Music... Sleep Token, Bad Omens, Evanescence, I Prevail, and Asking Alexandria are my top bands. Which isn't surprising in the slightest. Top songs were Take Me Back To Eden, Euclid, Just Pretend, Alkaline, Rain. All are Sleep Token tracks except for Just Pretend... Shocker.

What were your go-to writing snacks? - I'm not much of a snacker? I like pistachios if I'm going to snack.

What was the hardest fic to title? - None of them were hard to title. I guess the Christmas one took me the longest to narrow down from my options?

Share your favorite opening line - "The pain would never end."

Share your favorite ending line - "I'll remember that."

Share your favorite piece of dialogue - Oh no, I don't think I can pick a favorite. I love all of the banter in Red Sorrow so much. Maybe "... Do you know that you look like a Star Wars villain?" in the beginning?

Share an excerpt from your favorite scene - My favorite scene of Red Sorrow hasn't been posted yet... have this one:

“So you looked up something someone said and it pulled up porn.” Maria waved a dismissive hand. “Case closed. At least now you know what NSFW stands for.”

“It’s everywhere,” Rogers said, transitioning seamlessly to his thousand-yard-stare. “Like a minefield - and that’s when people aren’t actively sending it to you! I was shocked at just how much it, just, pops up. Stark was trying to help me with the internet and social media but then I kept getting messages about thirst traps and… it spiraled.”

“Ah ha, it was Stark! Should have known.” Barton slumped back down into the couch and returned his attention to the television. “That guy lives to push buttons. Especially yours. Maybe even more so than Fury’s.”

“Maybe we should put a parental lock on Cap’s devices,” Natasha added, a familiar mischief in her eyes and that lopsided grin of hers when she looked at Maria. “Commander, can we make that happen? We really can’t have his respectability violated. Imagine if the world found out that Captain America watches porn.”

“I’ll get right on it,” Maria said and nodded gravely. “I’m so sorry that happened to you, Rogers. Rest assured that I will punish the filthy miscreant and we will make sure to protect you from smut from now on. Can’t have our paragon sullied.”

“At least he isn’t in the porn.” Clint grinned. “Yet.”

“Very funny,” Rogers said with a huff. “You’re all so hilarious.”

“We know.” Natasha groaned and turned away from the laptop. “Change of subject. Are you ready to start the questioning? Rock-paper-scissors for who goes first?”

“Excuse me! You can’t just kidnap me. I want my lawyer!”

23. Share the final version of a sentence or paragraph you struggled with. What about it was challenging? Are you happy with how it turned out? - "The pain would never end. The intricate agony Bellatrix weaved for her, like the conductor of a torment symphony, reached deep, touching and torching everything. Every nerve and fiber, every stray thought, it burned through her synapses and fried her emotions, her rigid control to ash. Her torturer's masterpiece of anguish seized and strangled her lungs, stabbed through her belly, poured on her tongue and down her throat like honeyed acid. It twisted around her spine, pooled in her joints, and snapped every finger and toe." - I was trying to get the horrendous torture across without being too graphic and gory about it. As a horror fan and someone who loves a good action movie, too, I don't usually shy away from writing violence, but I wanted to be gentle here and I had to find a way to do that. I'm actually really happy with how it turned out. To me, it's much, much nicer than the more detailed version I originally had written.

24. What's something that surprised you while you were working on a fic? Did it change the story? - I had some interesting ideas pop up while I was outlining Vigilante (I haven't published that Fleurmione fic yet.) It didn't change that story so much, but I did end up going back and creating 5 other fics that will be precursors to it.

25. What did you use to write? (e.g. writing programs, paper & pen, etc.) - I use Novel Factory to track my word counts and keep all of my details in one place. Very handy. I usually draft in Word and paste into NF when I'm finished. This is all on my laptop, unless I'm breaking down a scene or taking notes, then I use my reMarkable tablet.

26. If you had to choose one, what was THE most satisfying writing moment of your year? - When I posted a chapter of Red Sorrow and a chapter of Life Signs one right after the other! Two fics going at the same time! WILD.

27. Did you do anything special to celebrate finishing a fic? - I went to bed early LOL

28. How did you recharge between fics? - I consume a lot of media. If I'm feeling depleted I give myself permission to watch something like Brooklyn99 or a dumb slasher movie, maybe Lord of the Rings if I have the time. Just to watch something for fun instead of studying or seeking inspiration.

29. If this were an awards show, who would you thank? - Sarah, Seamount, AJ, thank you so much for reading things that I've thrown at you and finding all of my missed or incorrectly used commas. - My new friends on the Fleurmione Discord, thank you for being so welcoming. It's been a crazy year and I really appreciate you taking me in so readily!

30. What’s something that you want to write in 2024? - Oooh. Okay. I want to start the Fleurmione fic "A Ghost In The Hallway Grinning," and my really fun Blackhill fic "Everyone Goes Home." I've got a lot of things outline and ready to go, just haven't had the time to knock them all out yet. I hope 2024 will be a fun and prolific year! Maybe I'll even get around to finishing a WonderCroft fic or my Supercorp fic.

[switchelsweets]

Am I about to shotgun this album for the 16th time this month? Yes I am.

Am I going to cry when Euclid hits again like it’s my first time hearing it? You bet your ass.

Sleep Token is an alt metal group led by the character Vessel, whose lore states that he has a relationship with a mysterious entity called Sleep that inspires him to make his music, but is also slowly consuming his life. The lyrical themes often blur the lines between religious and personal devotion as Vessel loses more of himself to this state of being.

This album is more pop-inspired than previous ones, but generally swings between minimalist piano and vocal arrangements and something more akin to metalcore. It is a concept album with lots of musical callbacks to earlier tracks on the album and even to previous albums. Fully worth a full listen-through. (TW for lyrical themes of toxic relationships, religion, self-harm, existentialism. Particularly for self-harm, the track Are You Really Okay may be skipped)