#also it doesn't say in the book she's aroace he just did not want to write romance he wanted to write dinosaurs

[ai-dont-care]

I'm reading the book my now boyfriend wrote and he said he made the main character aroace because he didn't want to write romance and he's annoyed that so many people (in the very small fandom so right now it's mostly just one guy) are shipping the main character with the antagonist BUT he also gave the main character a best friend and oh my god these bitches gay

[lousypotatoes]

What A Glorious Feeling

This chapter takes place after the pilot but before the first episode of the series.

Reader is a falcon demon, doesn't have a beak, wings drape over her kinda like Valentino's (i want him dead), reader has gray skin, usually wears a black tube top, black and white pinstripe pants, black boots, and has a daisy in her hair. Reader has the eyes and ears of a falcon and is also slightly cannibalistic.  Reader can summon any weapons at will and can move things with her mind, whenever she does this, her eyes glow red. Like Alastor, reader can also summon anything at will. If you had something else in mind for how the reader looks, you are more than welcome to imagine something different. 

I know Alastor is canonically aroace, but obviously, in this story he is not. Also, in this book, nobody knows the Radio Demon's name unless he decides to tell them. Sorry I should of said this earlier.

Song Recommendation:

I Did Something Bad - Taylor Swift

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12

Present day...

"Ah Dustin," Y/N said, walking over to the man, who was cowering in the corner. "You broke our deal. You know what happens to people who don't keep their word with me, don't you?"

"Please," he begged. "Give me one more month I promise-"

"You said the exact same thing six months ago," she spat angrily, her wings unfolding. 

"I swear-thi-this is the last time," he stuttered. "I just need-"

She summoned red chains, that latched onto Dustin's neck. Tugging the chains over to him, she grabbed his face, digging her claws into his cheeks. He let out a yelp of pain. 

"The deal was that if I killed your pathetic wife, I'd get your soul, and you would get me what I needed from that idiot overlord who thinks he's the shit, just because he's a pimp!" Y/N snarled, digging her claws in harder, drawing blood. "I have been more then generous towards you, and this is how you repay me?"

"I'm trying!" he cried out, tears running down his face. "Please just don't kill me!"

She had a small frown on her face. "I should rip you apart limb by limb," she said, calmly but in a deadly voice. "But I'm not goin' to do that," She removed the chains from his neck and put him down. 

"Thank you so much Assassin," Dustin said, wiping the blood off his cheeks. "I swear I will-"

He never finished his sentence. As fast as lighting, she summoned an axe and chopped his head clean off. 

"Instead, I'll make this is as quick and painless for you," she giggled, licking off the blood from the axe. "I'll have to thank Carmilla for the angelic steel at the next overlord meeting."

Using the axe, Y/N chopped up his limbs and stuffed them in a trash bag she had brought with her. 

"Cannibal town here I come," she smiled once she was done.

"Knock, knock," she said, knocking at the parlor door. 

"Y/N!" Rosie exclaimed upon seeing you. "What are you doing here so soon?" 

"I brought you a little somethin' to snack on," Y/N said, holding up the trash bag. 

"Oh you spoil me so much, my dear," Rosie said, licking her lips. 

"Anything for my closest friend," Y/N said, handing her the trash bag. 

"This is the fifth one this month," Rosie said, opening up the bag. "Sinners know better than to break a deal with you."

"They'll never learn, Rosie," she giggled as she took a seat on the couch. "Did you see the news the other day?"

"The Princess sure does have her hopes up for this hotel," Rosie answered, pouring herself a cup of tea. "Tea, Y/N?"

"No thank you," Y/N answered. "Do you think anyone would actually check in to that hotel?" 

"Who knows at this point," Rosie said, sipping her tea. "But judging by how people reacted, I don't think it's going to work out," 

"Shame," Y/N said. "It's a good idea, if it's actually possible."

"Say Y/N," she said, setting her cup down. "A friend of mine just recently got back into town. He's staying at this hotel," 

"Oh yeah?" Y/N asked curiously. "Who is it?"

"The Radio Demon," she said simply. 

Y/N's eyes widened in surprise. "He's been gone for seven years," she said. "Why on Earth would he return now? And why would he be stayin' at the Princess's hotel?"

"Satan knows," Rosie replied. "Y'know, you and him would really hit it off."

Y/N's eyebrow rose up. "Sorry my darlin'," she said, lightly chuckling. "The Radio Demon is most certainly not my type."

"You don't even know him," Rosie said, a slight frown on her face. 

"I don't need too," Y/N said curtly. "From what I know, he seems like a self-absorbed prick."

"Oh c'mon," Rosie nudged you. "The both of you have so much in common! You both like whiskey, you both like jazz, you both like killing people-"

"Why all of a sudden are you tryin' to play matchmaker?" Y/N interrupted. "And why The Radio Demon out of people?"

"Because you need to get out there!" Rosie said, smoothing out her dress. "Ever since I've known you, one of the main things you talk about is how in love you were when you were alive. What was his name again?" 

"His name was Alastor," she said, her heart hurting. "I've searched all of Hell Rosie. Either he's up in Heaven, or the Exorcists got to him."

"That's why I want you to meet him," Rosie said, patting Y/N's shoulder. "Please? Do it for little ol' me?" 

"I suppose so," she sighed. "I was already thinkin' about checkin' out the hotel anyway."

"Marvelous!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands together "I promise, you won't regret it!"

Landing in front of the hotel, she knocked at the door, feeling nervous, her wings fluttered behind her. 

"I'm coming!" chirped a feminine voice from behind the door. 

Fiddling with the hem of her top, Y/N waited until the person opened up the door. 

 The princess herself opened the door. "Hello! And welcome to the Hazbin Hot-"

Upon seeing your face in the doorway, she immediately slammed the door shut. 

"Vaggie!" Charlie cried out. 

"What is it?" Vaggie asked, coming down the staircase. 

"The Assassin is at the door," Charlie panicked, pointing at the door. "What do we do?" 

"Really? Another fucking overlord?" Vaggie angrily said, walking over to the door. "I'll handle this."

The door opened up a second time. Instead of the princess, a girl with a large X over her eye appeared in the doorway. 

"What the hell do you want?" she asked suspiciously. 

"There's no need to be so hostile," Y/N said, putting up her hands. "I'm here to simply offer up my services."

"We don't need you to kill anyone,"

"Not those kinds of services," she laughed. "I want to help with your hotel."

"Thanks, but we already have an overlord helping us," Vaggie said, eyeing her up and down. 

"The Radio Demon, yes I know," she said, crossing her arms. "I still want to help,"

As Vaggie was about to close the door, Charlie popped up beside her. 

"Wait Vaggie, we could use her help," she said, smiling. "With two overlords helping us, we can get a lot more done!" 

"You have a point," Vaggie grumbled. "But I'm keeping my eye on you," 

Charlie beckoned you to come in. "Thank you, Princess Morningstar," Y/N said, stepping inside.

"Oh please, just call me Charlie," she waved off. "This is Vaggie," she gestured to the girl with the X.

"It's a pleasure to meet you both,"

"Thank you!" Charlie gushed. "Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel-er-"

"Y/N," she said. "My name is Y/N."

"Right! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel Y/N! Would you like a tour?"

"Of course,"

"Why does the bar look like that?" Y/N asked after the tour was over. 

"Someone blew it up a few days ago," Charlie said simply. "Our facility manager fixed it up so it's nothing to worry about!" 

"Oh-uh-" Y/N didn't know was to say. "I'm glad it's all fixed."

"Oh my gosh!" she exclaimed. "I have to introduce you to everyone! C'mon!" Charlie grabbed her arm and dragged her away. 

"This is Nifty, our maid," she said gesturing to the small demon, cleaning the floor. "Nifty, this is Y/N, she'll be staying with us 

Nifty turned around and her eye widened and she smiled in a scary way. 

"Ooooo! I've never seen a bad girl before!" she said menacingly as she crawled up on you. "Do you want to punish some bad boys with me?"

"Just give me the time and place, sweetie," Y/N said, putting Nifty down. Nifty quicky ran off.

"She's mostly harmless," Charlie said nervously. "Just don't let her bite you."

"I'll keep that in mind," she laughed. 

"This is Husk, our bartender," she said gleefully. 

Husk was drinking from a bottle, he nodded at Y/N but didn't say anything. 

"It's nice to meet you, Husk," she said politely. 

Husk recognized her at second glance, almost spitting out his booze, he decided not to say anything about it, though. 

"Oooooo heya Y/N~" said a voice. 

Y/N turned around and grinned. "It's nice to see you again Angel Dust,"

"Ohhh it's nice to see you too baby~" he said seductively. 

"Oh that's wonderful!" Charlie exclaimed, her eyes sparkilng. "You two know each other!"

"Yeah, we met at a party a while back," Y/N explained. "He kept wantin' to look at a sword that I had just got."

"Y'know babycakes," Angel said, walking over to her. "I could show you my sword, if you want~"

"Another time, Angel," Y/N laughed, Charlie laughed awkwardly with her. 

"Well, I think that's it!" Charlie said, clapping her hands together. "I'll show you to your room and if there's anything you need, just-"

"Oh, we have a new guest?  Heavens, why didn't anyone tell me?" said a staticky voice. 

Y/N turned and saw the infamous Radio Demon standing right behind her. Upon closer inspection, there was a look in his eyes that seemed familiar. 

Too familiar. 

Y/N had loved looking into those eyes, it had brought comfort to her. 

"Oh my gosh! How could I forget!" Charlie said. "Y/N is going to be helping us around the hotel just like you!" 

At the mention of her name, something pulled at Alastor's heartstrings. 

"Well, we need all the help we can get, that's for certain," Alastor laughed.

That laugh, Y/N had imagined it every single day when she arrived in Hell.

"Y/N, this is our facility mana-"

"Alastor?"

Her voice, it sounded like an angel. Alastor remembered the first time he heard it. Everything clicked into place for the both of them.

"Y/N?"

Sorry if all the characters are a little ooc. I need to rewatch the show lmao. 

THERES AN ECLIPSE TODAY!!!

stay safe out there you little rascals <33

xoxo, Izzy

[saccharineomens]

i've been poking at this too long to care how visually appealing it is anymore. My headcanons for the main characters' sexualities, based on canon information! (has no bearing on ships.) Canon speculation below the cut.

marcille (bi): fascinated by romance and loves romance. we only see her show explicit interest in a male (fictional character (General Halleus from the book series she loves)), but i don't think she's fully straight.

falin (aro? ace? lesbian? genderqueer?): falin's only interest in relationships in canon is 'she considered accepting shuro's proposal because she was afraid nobody else would want her, but felt it'd be unfair to him because she had no feelings for him'. i consider whether she's aroace or a lesbian or maybe bi/pan, and she also seems like she might have some genderqueer feelings, based on some of her discomfort with her body and wearing certain types of femme clothing. (Also the fact that she‘s part male dragon.) Since she ends the story going on a journey for herself, it feels like she'll finally get the chance to figure out what she wants.

laios (pan, demi): he hasn't shown explicit interest in men, but similar to marcille, i don't feel he's fully straight. He’s aesthetically attracted to monsters, at the very least, so gender probably doesn’t factor in for him. romance/sex just don’t seem to be much of a high priority to him in general, but he did think his ex-fiance was cute and didn't seem uncomfortable with the idea of marriage (just seemed unhappy with being trapped in his hometown), so i feel like demisexuality fits him well.

About his succubus: He was very noticeably not stopped in his tracks by it like Chilchuck and Marcille, but that could possibly be because it just….looked exactly like Marcille, not an obvious fantasy. He started blushing and stammering heavily when it turned into a monster, which like….this boy is definitely a furry/monsterfucker, if anything, but that doesn’t speak on his attraction to actual humans.

I think it speaks for something that the succubi are able to literally read minds and craft the perfect fantasy for their specific target. And for Laios, it wasn’t just “his friend Marcille”. It was a version of his friend Marcille that wasn’t grossed out by monsters, didn’t think he was weird for wanting to be one, and was able to turn Laios into one. It was a Marcille who understood him at his deepest level that made him become a blushing, stammering mess to rival Chilchuck. Which is why I think he’s Demi, and needs a strong emotional connection with someone before he finds them attractive.

kabru (pan): his special interest is people, and he's bold enough with his sexuality to kiss rin despite not being in a relationship with her. so being pan/bi feels appropriate.

chilchuck (bi): he has a wife, and they were childhood friends, so he's definitely allo. but his comments and behavior towards senshi makes me suspect he might be bi, and just never considered the possibility due to being in a committed relationship.

senshi (gay, ace): this is 90% off of vibes. he keeps to himself in the dungeon and doesn't seem to have any need for social company, he's a complete hermit. Being ace makes sense to me, but so would him just having a low social drive. His succubus was 'a woman he hadn't seen since he was a child', but his journal implies it wasn't a romantic/sexual attraction.

namari (bi/lesbian): she is at the very least attracted to women, given her behavior with kiki, but she does make a point to say that kaka is also attractive to her, and her friends at the bar tease her about Kaka being her “new” boyfriend (implying previous boyfriends).

shuro: the token straight (in love with falin, asked her to marry him). i love you shuro <3 (but i can also see him being into men. there's no evidence to the contrary)

izutsumi: aroace. literally no question. her succubus is her mother.

[jamiedc-they-them]

Rest (Platonic)

Summary: Travelling the universe is something you adore, with your sister and newfound best friend, but old demons still haunt you, no matter what...

Notes: Bad headspace, needed a comfort fic and it turned into a vent fic I'm sorry :))) Also in this, R is Nb and Aroace, but it barely plays in. So do substitute what you wish :))))) topics covered in the case of trigger: Depression; Suicidal Ideation; Premature Birth; survivor guilt.

You couldn't remember the name of the system you were in, but it looked breathtaking. a shimmering horizon. It reminded you of your favourite book series, Dune, with the number of stories going on at once, and yet the small scale it seemed to have in such a vast galaxy. That, and the beauty of the shimmer of the sun as it ran off the planet, this one being a shade of red instead. It was odd, how despite the distance things seemed to rhyme. It reminded you of one of the things you heard the Doctor say:

"No job. No boss..." Yeah, that was you, but not by choice. You were looking. Looking with all you had in you. Ruby used to joke with you. "you're putting in a full-time effort to at least be paid for it."

You leant your head on the Tardis door, sighing. You wish you had the freedom he had, and yet you were human and tired. So, very tried.

"Hey," you jumped at the sudden voice. Turning, you saw the Doctor. He smiled at you, "you alright over here, babes?"

You snorted at the nickname. Your asexual-aromantic nature, along with just how your brain worked in a desperate attempt to fit in with society, made you read it the wrong way when he first used the nickname. He, seemingly with second nature, spoke to you about it. He was open, that was one of the many things you loved about him. He was open. You could go to him about anything and everything. And you did. You, him, and Ruby had good chats on your adventures, sometimes just having a picnic and talking. Hell, he was the one who helped you feel at home in your gender expression as a non-binary person, showing you some dresses to wear. Whatever you wanted to wear on the day, he was there to help. Ruby helped with a bit of makeup when you wanted it, and the three of you became inseparable.

But still, all this running around. Ruby had already gone to bed. Yet, here you were, mind still running amok.

"Can I ask you something?" you ask. The Doctor nods, leaning against the other door, his full attention is on you, "do you ever sleep?"

He smiles, part of him knows you're joking, but it doesn't fully meet his eyes. How can he read you so well? Are you that predictable?

He looks out at the system you're in as well, "I do," he says, "should see me on that console some days. Just out like a light," he even clicks his fingers to emphasise the point. You hum.

He then turns serious, "But I do. Don't worry. I mean, it took 15 generations, but I do rest, Y/N. Just, the hyperactive mind sometimes," he taps his head, "always onto the next thing, you know?"

You nod, not meeting his eyes and looking out at the system again.

"Ruby ever tell you about how I came to be in this world?"

The Doctor shook his head, "she didn't," he said, "but I always felt she thought that it wasn't her place to. I never wanted to pry."

You nod, appreciative of your two friends, "Premature. Didn't weigh much at all, like a pound or so, can't remember UK measurements for babies," you smile, "but yeah, not a lot at all."

The Doctor nods, smiling a bit at your humour, but stays silent as he lets you continue, "Some of the kids on my ward didn't make it...and I just, I don't know. With all we've seen, you know? Fate and all that? With Ruby's snow and everything...maybe it's like, like - I don't know, sorry," you put your face in your hand. Your hand goes into a fist, and you knock it on your head a few times.

"Hey. Hey, no," The Doctor says, voice gentle but having a bit of firmness to it, as he pauses your movements, "it's ok," he says, "take your time. I'm here," he puts your hand to his chest, and you can feel the two hearts beating, "I'm listening," he promises, "I'm right here. Take all the time you need."

You don't even clock the accidental pun. You just look at the eyes of your best friend. How you've grown to care and love this man in such a space of time, you don't know, but you have grown attached to him, and him to you. His earnest gaze, love of life and all around him, and time he makes for you and himself, you think it is. Someone who just has this comforting aura around him and how he exudes it to all who need it.

You don't deserve -

"Hey," he says again, dragging you out of your mental hell, "I'm here, Y/N."

"I just -" You can feel the emotions inside of you - they may not always come out externally, but here they are. Tears, you can feel the tears pricking at your vision, "why did I make it, you know?"

The Doctor softens. His gaze went from concerned, to protective, to loving, to sadness. The emotions all dance around each other at once, then coalesce.

Physically, that comes in as a hug.

"Oh, honey," he says, hand going to your head, "I may have met many a human, but none like you. They're all unique people in their way, and I am so, so, sorry that one way that you are is with this pain."

"Who's in pain?" a tired question is asked. You both part, seeing Ruby rubbing her eyes and stretching. Her eyes are still shut, and she's wearing some pyjamas she found in the wardrobe.

She locks eyes with The Doctor first, a silent moment of communication passing by in an instant, before she looks at you:

"What's wrong, Y/N?"

"I, uh -" you stutter. The Doctor puts a hand on your shoulder. He feels you shake under it.

Ruby softens as well, "oh, sweetheart," she says, holding out her hands, "why don't we take a seat, yeah? All of us?"

The Doctor looks at you: your call.

You sniffle a bit, before nodding. Before you move, you put a hand to The Doctor's, giving a squeeze. You move to your sister. He shuts the doors.

Ruby takes your hands, giving them a soft squeeze, before sitting with you on a sofa that the Tardis had recently added to itself near the console. You had passed out a few times on there, and it (or she? you weren't sure how to refer to the TARDIS) created it for you.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"Oh, no, don't apologise," Ruby says, trying to meet your eyes as you look everywhere but your sister, "I'm not angry at you. Not ever. Not with this, especially. I'm not expecting you to just be ok with what happened."

"Trauma never fully goes away," The Doctor says, crouching down near you and putting a hand on your knee.

"It feels like it should though, right?" You argue, "You said that, like, you're the one who is more open."

The Doctor smiles a soft one, "I am," he says, "but that doesn't mean it just goes away. It never does. It lingers. What I'd say though," he says, "is it's leaning on people and talking about it that can help you take a step forward if you ever stumble. It can manifest in different ways and feelings."

"It's just --" you look at Ruby, her face falling more at the pain in your eyes, "you're trying to solve your birth mother's identity. And" you look to The Doctor, "you have your pain. I just - I don't want to add to that."

The two best friends look at each other, before you. Ruby holds you tightly to her. The Doctor sits next to you on the sofa, hugging you as well.

"Oh, love," Ruby says, "I'll say it as many times as needed, you're never a burden. Ever. We've always got time for you. And" she pushes back a bit - The Doctor with his hands around your shoulders - and puts her hands on your cheeks, "you are always going to be my sibling. And you are always going to be one of the best people I know, ok?"

You bury yourself in Ruby's shoulder. She kisses your head before holding you tightly.

The Doctor and her meet eyes. They'll make good on this promise.

You pull away from Ruby, the pair having a hand on your back.

"I'm tired," you say. Despite the meaning going both ways, given the way you rub at your eyes, they can tell which way the pendulum swings right now.

"Understandable," The Doctor says in a non-judgemental tone. He looked at Ruby, and she nods.

"Here," The Doctor says, holding out a blanket. You take it. You then notice that he's given a blanket to Ruby as well and holds his one.

"What -" you sniffle, "what are you doing?"

"Sleeping here, of course," Ruby says.

You look between the two, "Guys, no -"

"This is your safe space," The Doctor says, "and I love that. We're your safe space, too. I know you're tactile and love deeply. So, why not combine the two?"

You chuckle. You don't know what to say.

You look to Ruby, and she just nods, before getting up.

Ruby lays down near the sofa on one side, The Doctor on the other.

"Thank you," you say.

"Always," they say in sync.

You all rest. Or find it, in the end.

The Doctor is right, the trauma may never fully leave you. But this is your safe space. It holds value to you and has helped you both find yourself and through many a crisis. And it always would.

As they always would.

[hi-i-love-u-bitch]

I have a kind of funny/kind of tragic AU idea bubbling in my head for the past few weeks.

So like in this AU Alastor isn't under a contract/deal, he's still insane and wants to cause chaos BUT ALSO he's lonely and wants to make friends. He's still very much AroAce in this AU so no romance or sex but that doesn't mean he doesn't want an honest connection with people. But he's also a psychotic serial killer with a very warped sense of morality which most people tend to find very creepy, so it's very difficult for him to actually get to know people when they don't want to approach you. Mimzy he's known since he was alive while Rosie and Zestiel have been in hell much longer and have seen and done shit much worse so its easy for Alastor to make friends with them.

Like he genuinely had a very close friendship with Vox up until Vox confessed his feelings and asked Alastor to join the Vees. Alastor of course said no but since he still wanted to be friends with Vox he tried to reject him as nicely as possible. Vox of course DID NOT take that well and a fight ensues between them. He considered Vox his best friend and was absolutely devastating when it all went down. That of course did not help with his already waning sanity.

When Alastor met Niffty he was overall charmed by her eccentric and chaotic nature. They got along like a house on fire, sometimes literally. She wasn't even offended when Alastor rejected her romantic advances, cheerfully stating that it was fine as long as she could stay by his side. "You wouldn't be able to get rid of me anyways!" A statement that would strike fear onto even the bravest of men but instead brought Alastor immense amounts of comfort and relief. Even so, he needed to assure that Niffty would never leave him, so he offered a contract. Alastor didn't even need to do all that much convincing to get her to sign, just say that as long as her soul was his they'd be together forever. Niffty was lonely too, an outsider even amongst the dammed of hell itself. Kindred spirits now forever intertwined by soul and contract.

Alastor didn't think much of Husk when they first met, just another pompous overlord drunk off power. In some ways he was right but also Husk was witty and charming and liked jazz and wasn't at all startled by Alastor's creepy demeanor and "unique" hobbies. He laughed at Alastor's jokes even if he said they were god awful, was probably the only other person living or dead that could drink Alastor under a table, and he didn't at all mind Alastor's distaste for technology passed the 1930s. Niffty liked him too which was a pretty good sign in Alastor's book and they got along swimmingly. The void that Vox left when they had inevitably parted ways was beginning to fill itself with whiskey, smoke, and card games. Alastor was determined NOT to lose it this time.

Alastor cheated of course, there was no way in hell he'd beat the gambling overlord fairly. He disguised his plan with a few stiff drinks and a seemingly playfully bet not ment to mean anything more than a joke. Husk was furious, if Alastor hadn't had him chained down he was sure the cat man would have shreded him to ribbons. He let Husk have a bit of space after that, let him cool down a bit, and it nearly made Alastor regret the whole thing because Husk refused to talk to him for MONTHS. Alastor did feel a bit guilty, not for tricking Husk into a contract but for cheating. Because Husk cheated all the time with anything and everything, from the most innocent card game between acquaintances to soul deals and contracts, but he never once cheated Alastor ever.

Husk did come around eventually, reluctantly, in that way people usually do when they finally give up and find they're in a situation they can't get out of. He was bitter, grumpy, and still incredibly pissed off about everything but at least he as talking to Alastor again. Albeit if only just to tell him off, but Alastor took it as a win anyway. He's lucky that he's Alastor's best friend (again, not by choice) because if anyone else were to speak to him like that they'd be dinner.

When Alastor hears about the hotel he thinks its the stupidest idea anybody has ever come up with. When he heard that it came from the princess of hell herself it made it that much funnier to him. Alastor loved messing around with people, his favorite kind being powerful people that were too much of a doormat to realize how powerful they actually are. That's what Charlie was to Alastor: a powerful being reduced to a meek and naive girl. At least, at first. Charlie was...kind. Far too kind for someone born and raised in hell. She genuinely cared and worried for the dirty filth of this wretched land as if there was actually something to save. That is to say: she was kind to him. She was still slightly creeped out by his overall demeanor but she was still kind and sweet and caring. She liked to talk to him even though Alastor would sometimes say some disturbing shit, she thanked him for his help even though he told her to her face that he thought her dreams where foolish, and she overall seemed to actually enjoy his company.

She reminded him of his mother.

That's it! That's all I'm giving you guys because if I keep going I'm gunna end up writing a whole fic about it 😅

[acemakes-art143]

WOOOO THE NEW UPDATE'S HERE!!!! I have been waiting oh so long for this and I'm so glad it's here! After going through all main pages on the site and clicking on most (or all) of the secrets, here are my thoughts.

WALLY IS SILLIER THAN I COULD'VE EVER IMAGINED!! he's so goofy and clueless and it's so freaking adorable!!! That interview audio had me screaming!!! The part where the interviewer asked wally about a romantic interest in anyone and wally was kinda just like "??" Was so cute oh my goshhhh!!!! "I love everyone! I love my friends" AAAAAA AROACE WALLY HC GO BRRRRRRRR!!! Also the Eddie book recording thigy when wally was like "I'm on the ground again :D" AAAAAAAA!!

Frank's Neuro is so diverging. The just so recording was just absolutely funky brain moments. He doesn't have to explain his heckin he just let him be.

In the recording with Sally and Julie, I want to point out that at the very end when it cuts off, I could've sworn that Sally was about to call wally "waliver". Like oliver. IS THAT HIS NAME?? IS IT NOT WALLACE???? IS WALLY'S NAME WALIVER???? I heard that and my reaction was pretty much "what did she just call him? Is that his name? Wha????" I was so absolutely surprised and I have no idea if I misheard it but after watching through a second time and hearing it again I'm now just left questioning this. Did anyone else notice that???

Also I noticed that all the "bug" recordings end when someone mentions wally. Idk what it means, maybe it's just highlighting the significance of him, but he also never speaks in any of those recordings, but from a few of the videos containing wally's hands in the frame, I suspect that they're filmed either by or from the prospective of wally.

I've come to the conclusion that Barnaby and frank have a similar relationship to sans and papyrus. The voices are even similar! Barnaby always making puns and frank just wanting him to stop, very good amazing love it

That's all I can think of for things to say about the wh update in regards to the actual characters themselves, but WOW! There was so much there! All the cute art! All the secrets! We have voices for them all now!!! I was just overflowing with excitement the whole time I was going through the site!!

[kehideni]

There is one thing i'm really wondering about.

When did Rayla fall in love with Callum? I mean i get the why, and i ship it "yay" but she was so good at hiding her emotions i can't really pinpoint when she tipped over from "Callum is a friend." to "I can't lose him."

You can pinpoint when she turned from weird ally to friend. It was when Callum asked her to go to the Banther Lodge, his "heartfelt speech" was relatable to her.

We know she was already aware of her own feelings regarding Callum by the time he did dark magic.

We also know she was already very protective of Callum by the time Villads had to stop the Ruthless because of the storm. "If you die out there, i swear i'll kill you."

Before that they were flying on Phoe-Phoe, and before that they were staying with Lujanne where the only thing remotely suggesting any of her feelings was that she was disgusted by Claudia's clear approach to Callum. Which i hardly accept as Soren was also disgusted eventhough he showed support for Callum's approach to Claudia before. And also because... as an aroace i did find it cringe too. Somehow Claudia's romantic relationships end up being cringe.

I'm sorry, idk how to say it nicely but she doesn't seem to do well in romantic relationships. She is very Azula-esque in many ways(i mean... duh) They are both very close family oriented characters, both are essencially victims of their broken family, both are incredibly talented and powerful despite being hella childish because parents forgot to raise them, oops. And being raised so fked up they seem to be unable to form actually functioning romantic relationships.

Even with Terry, i felt like Terry loves her and Claudia is just happy to have a mostly yes-man by her.

But this is a Rayla post, sidenote over.

On Callum's part i'm fairly sure by the time he used dark magic he returned Rayla's feelings, as unaware of it as he was. I mean dude pretty much decided on a whim to throw his principles out the window for Rayla's sake(and ended up corrupting his own soul in the process but he didn't know that)

You'd think that he didn't love Rayla when they were still with Lujanne because he still had a crush on Claudia, but that's not entirely correct.

In the novelization of season 2, when he hangs out with Claudia he is acutely aware of Rayla's whereabouts and opinions and doesn't want Rayla to see him with her even in pretty normal circumstances. The guy just... didn't think it's weird to be hyper aware of someone who he apparently has no feelings for.

So... what's my guess on when Rayla started feeling more than friendship towards Callum?

Hmmm.

Probably when they made up on the frozen lake where they dropped Zym's egg.

And Callum eeeehhh probably earlier he just didn't know? I mean in chapter 14 "the sad prince" he was completely unaware he drew Rayla and he quickly hid it from her when she returned, eventhough Callum is not shy of his drawings.

Siiigh... book 3's novelization is still months away, i wonder what insight that's gonna give.

[forgottenspring]

Mild rant on Alastor bc I'm tired.

*takes deep breath*

I was going to stay out of this so rip to my inbox.

Does anybody remember the whole ace doxing list on here? The whole discussion of not shipping gay characters with the opposite gender? The rep for pan/bi representation and the steps to do it right? Does anybody remember when ppl on here discussed how aros and aces aren't a part of the queer community bc they're not 'gay enough' in a way? Bc I do. That was about a decade ago. And I remember when Alastor was first introduced in the pilot and ppl not accepting he was aroace back then.

It doesn't matter if Alastor is entirely aroace and if he's capable of dating or not.

What matters is we still have so little ace representation and acceptance, especially aroace rep, that a few years ago when a real person Jaiden Animations came out as aroace, ppl tried to destroy her, bc even with a perfect valid explanation of her just saying aroaces are their own thing and she just doesn't want to date, ppl treated it like she was lying or was trying to sneak into the queer community and was straight or all the other horrible things yall might remember "fans" did to her.

Alastor being aroace isn't about being the rep of "Aroaces can feel attraction!!!" bc be real honest.

How many aroace popular characters can ppl list that a regular person on the street is going to know? Bc I've heard all their arguments to invalidate their representation.

Jughead? Oh you mean Cole Sprouse who made out and got it on with Lili Reinhart playing Betty bc he found her sexy? Oh but in the old comics he's a gay character whose in denial. Yelena Boleva? Who? Oh that woman? She's hot she's just traumatized and needs to find the right person. Charlie Weasley? Oh he was only in the books? He was confirmed as aroace through a passive comment most ppl didn't know about from the author that never used the term? Luffy? You mean one of the most shipped characters in One Piece? No he's just an idiot/childish so he doesn't understand girls are pretty. Caduceus Clay? Sorry I didn't watch Critical Role whose that? Are you sure he's aroace? He feels gay to me.

I can list more ppl, but I'm sure most ppl couldn't.

I remember the whole discussion of the pan/bi representation argument of "Yes! We know pan/bi ppl can date the opposite gender. But straight ppl don't know about pan/bi nearly at all or don't accept it," so showing it as gay, who know the term more, until it's shown clearly the character is queer and not "confused straights" they then can have opposite gender attraction. Bc sooooo many pan/bi characters end up "straight" at the end of their show/book. Bc I remember when ppl refused to accept that Deadpool is pan bc of his wife and started freaking out when he dated a nonbinary person in the comics or helped that one genderqueer person he knew.

Representation is about showing to ppl what they're not understanding about the identity in the plainest sense of the words of the identity, then when there's enough rep to show they're not all the same, then you can have the ones that break the rules.

Alastor whether or not he wants to date doesn't matter. What matters is this whole situation blew out of proportion bc ppl refused to accept that some ppl don't feel comfy shipping him. Bc they see themselves in him and don't want that. BUT! Also ppl under the aro and ace umbrella also have no rep and wanted to see him breaking the stereotype they probs have yelled at them of "You can't have a partner you're aroace I forbid it" and wanted to see thru their own experiences how that would be done.

Here's the problem.... As someone who has read a lot of aroace headcanon fanfics as an aroace....... A lot of ppl who are allo don't realize aroace "crushes" are missing emotions... That's why they're aroace. And they'll write them like they're the same just "muted" or "needs to warm up" kinda thing. Or make the character's love "childish" to explain the lack of romance/sex. Which is messed up. And that's the problem here.

Alastor didn't need to be this blown out of proportion of a situation. The problem is ppl found him sexy and the classic "But aroace hot, they can't be aroace bc why hot?" discussion got brought back up without the gentle post format discussions and instead it was a lot of shippers on tiktok with tiny word counts arguing a complex issue.

Ppl should be allowed to ship whatever (except problematic I know yall too well), especially if they see themselves in the characters and especially if they have the same identity and want to explore that!!

The truth of the matter is this is such a huge issue that just keeps happening bc ppl are too used to fandom queer spheres where ppl already know aroace means "off the table" and so they want to play with qprs or grayromantics/sexuals not knowing what that entails bc there's sooooo lil aroace rep that actually explores being aroace and a lot of ppl don't know the basics, and even how very different aroace "off the table" is when you aren't the classic "uwu I'm just innocent and have no friends or importance to the plot so just ignore me and have me be adopted by one of the main couples as a 'kid' figure."

Not to mention that a lot of ppl still think ace means aroace. That aces can't date bc there's ppl who don't know that romantic and sexual attraction are different!

I'm just.... So tired. So very tired of having ppl shout at me what it means to be aroace and being unable to look up the lil aroace rep we have bc of this issue I've seen a million times is all.

[alteregomp4]

Lets talk about Lestat and Gabrielle relationship...

HUGE TRIGGER WARNING: for talks of incest. and spoilers for The Vampire Lestat I guess, but once again... talks of incest.

FYI: In no way am I trying to villainize Gabrielle and if it comes off that way that is not my attention as she is also clearly a victim, I view her as such and her story is an interesting one to also dive into especially with the aspects of gender and how society sees gender identity. But we should also acknowledge that victims can sometimes become perpetrators unknowingly sadly, especially due to external factors and deep seated trauma stemming from childhood or events that have happened to that person that are clearly established in the book The Vampire Lestat and throughout the whole series even if unintentional on Anne Rice part. And once again, this is just my point of view and how I interpreted it. I truly just wish people would approach a topic like this with nuance, seriousness, and finally respect as most of the time in the books these subjects are not.

Possible controversial opinion since people love joking about it and even want it in the show which I think that's rather odd to do or want since like you guys do know that victims of this actual stuff exist as well as the fact they could be consuming said media for multiple reasons but I think people in the interview with the vampire/the vampire chronicles fandom especially book readers and ESPECIALLY those that are also Anne Rice d riders should realize that the relationship between Lestat and his mother was and is emotional incest... something that is not often talked but just as harmful as overt incest. It is also very codependent but I will just be high-lighting the convert incest here, though the two overlap a ton in these types of relationships.

This is something that affects someone for life and isn't really that funny and something that shouldn't be seen as sexy like it has been in media recently due to House Of The Dragon plus some other things that's came out in recent years, it's quite gross how normalized it's getting to find it hot because incest of any kind affects not only the development of the child but how they handle their personal relationships after they've grown. Something that is very clear in Lestat's character throughout the whole series.

I do not think me picking up on this is far fetched since the term was coined in the 1980s by psychologist Kenneth Adamswhen (I will be pulling stuff from a interview he did about the subject which I will link as it's a interesting reading) when people first started looking into the subject and the book came out in 1985, though knowing Anne Rice she just probably had a fetish for this thing as it often appears in her books which is whole another thing on it's own. It appears a lot doesn't excuse btw since the topic of abuse of any kind is not handled well. (also before people start saying that these books are gothic fiction and that incest is a staple of the genre still doesn't excuse it in my opinion since there is better ways to handle the topic than make it obvious fetish work. Yes, art is supposed to make you uncomfortable and I actively consume art that does exactly that to the consumer but there is the line that can be easily crossed when dealing with certain subjects if you at least don't treat them seriously and with care like they need to be.)

Their relationship is not enmeshment, something people confuse emotional incest to be and often mix the two up. But their relationship fits so many boxes of emotional incest that it is maddening I have seen no one else bring up the subject and just chalk it up to plan ole incest because of the kissing as well as blood sharing symbolizing sex for vampires in these works. (Which I have huge criticisms on how vampires are in the series plus I may be biased to not see kissing as inherently sexual due to being aroace and by the time the kisses happen Lestat has already faced stalking, literally being kidnapped by a strange man who had been watching him as well as talking to him through his mind referencing the fact he was known as wolf-killer plus having corpses that looked just like Lestat in a tower that Lestat had to stay in, turned Lestat against his will then watched said man kill himself after becoming a vampire, and sexual trauma from said man as well. So it is not surprising to me that Lestat would seek out some sort of affection from an older trusted figure in his life, even if it is negative and harmful. Most victims do this unconsciously or because the trauma makes them feel like this is the only way they feel like they can seek out validation and affection from others.)

"Any time there is physical sexual contact, and that includes things like inappropriate kissing or touching, we’re talking about overt incest. Basically, you’ve moved past playing a role and into being an object. It can be both, of course. When that happens, usually the overt incest lasts a much shorter time than the longer-term surrogate partner role. I should also state that in cases of overt and covert combined, it isn’t uncommon to see the victims involved as adults with incestuous fantasies – mother and son or father and daughter stuff online, or power differential relationships where a boundary is crossed. Or their lovers tend to be much older or younger, so much so that the age difference raises some people’s eyebrows. So, the incestuous dynamic is played out in some way."

"Frankly, I try not to draw too fine a distinction here because there is definitely a blurry line between things like sitting too close and making a child uncomfortable vs. kissing that child on the lips too long. Either way it feels icky. And the result might be that even though nobody touched my penis or breasts or vagina, when my lover tries to kiss me, I withdraw. That withdrawal is your evidence that something happened that was inappropriate and not welcome."

In the book we are shown things that check off boxes on known clear signs of emotional incest, and this is the first few pages of the book when Lestat first starts talking about his up-brining. Before I list five signs that I think fit and how I see Lestat and Gabrielle relationship as well as explain why I feel that way but let us learn what emotional incest aka also known as convert incest is.

"Covert incest describes a relationship between a parent and child in which the child feels more like a romantic partner. Typically the parent is motivated by the loneliness and emptiness of a troubled marriage, so he or she turns the child into a surrogate partner. There is not necessarily any kind of overt sexual touching, but the relationship feels too close for comfort to the child. The boundaries are such that there is an incestuous feeling. The child feels used and trapped, the same as with overt incest."

"Later on, covert incest victims tend to continue functioning in the role of a surrogate partner where they’re overly enmeshed with the parent [or] over-involved as a caretaker, even though they may have long forgotten the icky part that was present early on — usually during adolescence. As adults, instead of feeling icky, they might just feel frustrated, angry, obligated, and way too involved. This type of enmeshment is very common in terms of the adult-life characteristics. Basically, enmeshment describes the nature of the ongoing relationship; covert incest defines the earlier sexual inappropriateness."

In the first few pages after the opening of The Vampire Lestat once he begins to work on his novel we learn that his home life as a child and upbringing was not great to say the least. An abusive father, living clearly in poverty, brothers who couldn't care less if Lestat lived or died, and finally a mother who was often emotionally absent, avoided showing physical affection towards her children, and that also hindered her children's skills of being able to read as well as write out of spite because of the unfilling marriage she was forced into as well as life that she had to have because of being a woman in 1700s society.  Also I feel the disconnect she has from motherhood and being a mother affects her relationship with Lestat from the start as it is clear that she lives vicariously through him due to him having gotten most of her features and traits unlike his brothers, also because of her own struggles with womanhood as well as how society sees has always seen women and what it is to be a woman.

This situation is just brewing for a codependent relationship to happen, especially between mother and child as it's clear they both hold resentment towards the father. A simple codependent relationship can quickly turn abusive especially in a household like this and most of any kind of abuse that children can face is commonly more likely to be from family or people they know than strangers.

The five signs I wanted to point out that really struck me of fitting the two (only doing five as this post is already so long and I do not feel comfortable on trying to score points on it like how psychologists do for cases like these as I am clearly not one.):

Talking about sexual encounters or even dreams of one with your child: Gabrielle in page 39 of the book shares a dream she has of basically having a train run on her by the whole town, this is just after Lestat has opened up about his fears and nightmares he has of killing his brothers and father like he did to the wolves earlier in the forest. That he isn't the same Lestat he was and has come back as a killer instead of her son. He is still in the bloody clothes that he killed the wolves in when she shares this.

"'You know I imagine,'' she said, looking towards me again. ''Not so much the murdering of them as an abandon which disregards them completely. I imagine drinking wine until I'm so drunk I strip off my clothes and bathe in the mountain streams naked.'' I almost laughed. But it was a sublime amusement. I looked up at her, uncertain for a moment that I was hearing her cor-rectly. But she had said these words and she wasn't finished. ''And then I imagine going into the village," she said, ''and up into the inn and taking any men that come there-crude men, big men, old men, boys. Just lying there and taking them one after another, and feeling some magnificent triumph in it, some absolute release without a thought of what happens to your father or your brothers, whether they are alive or dead. In that moment that I am purely myself. I belong to no one." - Page 39, The Vampire Lestat

This is something really weird to just open up about with your child, especially after they open up about their fear of harming others and feeling like they aren't the same person they were after a traumatizing experience. I understand that she was trying to relate in a way about how she also feels these types of feelings towards Lestat's father and brothers but I full on had to put the book down out of pure shock that this was written right after a character was talking clearly about intrusive thoughts with your own ones that inherently sexual in nature, especially to your own child for that matter.

Sharing responsibility for adult decisions such as finances, employment, or where to live: Lestat and Gabrielle are the sole providers for the household. Lestat being the one that often brought in food due to finding comfort in hunting after being taken out of church as Gabrielle provided him the tools like his pet mastiffs, guns, and horse while Gabrielle was the sole reason they had any sort of money in the first place due to coming from a rich family, often selling her own jewelry to help get gifts for Lestat and just have money for the family. With this she also helped him run away to Paris with Nicki.

Because of this Lestat and Gabrielle have been sharing sole responsibility for adult decisions in the household and especially financial ones, which no child should be or feel responsible for.

Missing out on child-appropriate activities such as extracurriculars or time with friends: Lestat life was sheltered. To the point he didn't know how to write or read till he went to the church to study under the priest. The only friends he has had outside of his family up to this point are the people at the church, his dogs, the traveling theater company, and soon Nicki.

"I loved the monastery school. I loved the chapel and the hymns, the library with its thousands of old books, the bells that divided the day, the ever repeated rituals. I loved the cleanliness of the place, the overwhelming fact that all things here were well kept and in good repair, that work never ceased throughout the great house and the gardens. When I was corrected, which wasn't often, I knew an intense happiness because someone for the first time in my life was trying to make me into a good person, one who could learn things. Within a month I declared my vocation. I wanted to enter the order. I wanted to spend my life in those immaculate cloisters, in the library writing on parchment and learning to read the ancient books. I wanted to be enclosed forever with people who believed I could be good if I wanted to be. I was liked there. And that was a most unusual thing. I didn't make other people there unhappy or angry. The Father Superior wrote immediately to ask my father's permission. And frankly I thought my father would be glad to be rid of me. But three days later my brothers arrived to take me home with them. I cried and begged to stay, but there was nothing the Father Superior could do. And as soon as we reached the castle, my brothers took away my books and locked me up. I didn't understand why they were so angry. There was the hint that I had behaved like a fool for some reason. I couldn't stop crying. I was walking round and round and smashing my fist into things and kicking the door. Then my brother Augustin started coming in and talking to me. He'd circle the point at first, but what came clear finally was that no member of a great French family was going to be a poor teaching brother. How could I have misunderstood everything so completely? I was sent there to learn to read and write. Why did I always have to go to extremes? Why did I behave habitually like a wild creature? As for becoming a priest with real prospects within the Church, well, I was the youngest son of this family, now, wasn't I? I ought to think of my duties to my nieces and nephews. Translate all that to mean this: We have no money to launch a real ecclesiastical career for you, to make you a bishop or cardinal as befits our rank, so you have to live out your life here as an illiterate and a beggar. Come in the great hall and play chess with your father." - Pages 20 and 21, The Vampire Lestat

"When I woke up the next morning, she was gone and so were all the players, and my brothers were there. I never knew if my friends had been bribed to give me over, or just frightened off. More likely the latter. Whatever the case, I was taken back home again. Of course my family was perfectly horrified at what I'd done. Wanting to be a monk when you are twelve is excusable. But the theater had the taint of the devil. Even the great Moliere had not been given a Christian burial. And I'd run off with a troupe of ragged vagabond Italians, painted my face white, and acted with them in a town square for money. I was beaten severely, and when I cursed everyone, I was beaten again. The worst punishment, however, was seeing the look on my mother's face. I hadn't even told her I was going. And I had wounded her, a thing that had never really happened before. But she never said anything about it. When she came to me, she listened to me cry. I saw tears in her eyes. And she laid her hand on my shoulder, which for her was something a little remarkable. I didn't tell her what it had been like, those few days. But I think she knew. Something magical had been lost utterly. And once again, she defied my father. She put an end to the condemnations, the beatings, the restrictions. She had me sit beside her at the table. She deferred to me, actually talked to me in conversation that was perfectly unnatural to her, until she had subdued and dissolved the rancor of the family. Finally, as she had in the past, she produced another of her jewels and she bought the fine hunting rifle that I had taken with me when I killed the wolves." - Pages 34 and 35, The Vampire Lestat

Alternating feelings of love and hatred for your parent(s): This is shown in the first book as well as in this one, but now we get to see these feelings he has towards his mother rather than his father as well as brothers.

"She was silent for a while. And as I sat there, looking past her at the fire, I wanted to tell her a lot of things, how much I loved her particularly. But I was cautious. She had a way of cutting me off when I spoke to her, and mingled with my love was a powerful resentment of her. All my life I'd watched her read her Italian books and scribble letters to people in Naples, where she had grown up, yet she had no patience even to teach me or my brothers the alphabet. And nothing had changed after I came back from the monastery. I was twenty and I couldn't read or write more than a few prayers and my name. I hated the sight of her books; I hated her absorption in them. And in some vague way, I hated the fact that only extreme pain in me could ever wring from her the slightest warmth or interest. Yet she'd been my savior. And there was no one but her. And I was as tired of being alone, perhaps, as a young person can be. She was here now, out of the confines of her library, and she was attentive to me. Finally I was convinced that she wouldn't get up and go away, and I found myself speaking to her." Page 25, The Vampire Lestat

"And she almost laughed herself. Maybe in her own quiet way she was laughing. Curious moment. Some almost brutal sense of her as a human being quite removed from all that surrounded her. We did understand each other, and all my resentment of her didn't matter too much." - Page 27, The Vampire Lestat

Your parent(s) turned to you, instead of their partner or another adult, to unburden any feelings of emotional distress they experienced: Gabrielle is only open and shows any emotional towards her children if it is Lestat that she is talking to, she is closed off to everyone else in the household but him due to own her contempt and feelings around of being a wife and a mother. He is the first and only person to be told that she is sick and dying, that she doesn't expect to make it through another winter at best. This is a lot to put on anyone at any age, especially someone who is your child and after they have opened up a bit as well as their own traumatizing event.

"I made some little anguished sound. I think I leaned forward and said, "Mother! " "Don't say any more," she answered. I think she hated to be called mother, but I hadn't been able to help it." - Page 27, The Vampire Lestat

"I just wanted to speak it to another soul, " she said. "To hear it out loud. I'm perfectly horrified by it. I'm afraid of it. " I wanted to take her hands, but I knew she'd never allow it. She disliked to be touched. She never put her arms around anyone. And so it was in our glances that we held each other. My eyes filled with tears looking at her. She patted my hand. "Don't think on it much, " she said. "I don't. Just only now and then. But you must be ready to live on without me when the time comes. That may be harder for you than you realize. " I tried to say something; I couldn't make the words come. She left me just as she'd come in, silently. And though she'd never said anything about my clothes or my beard or how dreadful I looked, she sent the servants in with clean clothes for me, and the razor and warm water, and silently I let myself be taken care of by them." - Page 27, The Vampire Lestat

"I began to feel a little stronger. I stopped thinking about what happened with the wolves and I thought about her. I thought about the words "perfectly horrified, " and I didn't know what to make of them except they sounded exactly true. I'd feel that way if I were dying slowly. It would have been better on the mountain with the wolves. But there was more to it than that. She had always been silently unhappy. She hated the inertia and the hopelessness of our life here as much as I did. And now, after eight children, three living, five dead, she was dying. This was the end for her. I determined to get up if it would make her feel better, but when I tried I couldn't. The thought of her dying was unbearable. I paced the floor of my room a lot, ate the food brought to me, but still I wouldn't go to her. But by the end of the month, visitors came to draw me out." - Page 27 and 28, The Vampire Lestat

"She did not laugh often. She could look profoundly cold. Yet she had always a little girl sweetness. Well, I looked at her as she sat on my bed-I even stared at her, I suppose-and immediately she started to talk to me. "I know how it is, " she said to me. "You hate them. Because of what you've endured and what they don't know. They haven't the imagination to know what happened to you out there on the mountain. " I felt a cold delight in these words. I gave her the silent acknowledgment that she understood it perfectly. "It was the same the first time I bore a child, " she said. "I was in agony for twelve hours, and I felt trapped in the pain, knowing the only release was the birth or my own death. When it was over, I had your brother Augustin in my arms, but I didn't want anyone else near me. And it wasn't because I blamed them. It was only that I'd suffered like that, hour after hour, that I'd gone into the circle of hell and come back out. They hadn't been in the circle of hell. And I felt quiet all over. In this common occurrence, this vulgar act of giving birth, I understood the meaning of utter loneliness." - Page 24 and 25, The Vampire Lestat

Finally to conclude this post, this is just my point of view on their relationship and how I interpreted it but I really hope the show handles something like this with care instead of making a joke out of it or making it seem like a normal vampire thing since that's what Anne Rice did. I would love if they went at with this angle of emotional incest or even just a strong codependent relationship between mother and son as I feel like it could open a lot of great conversations on the topic as bring it more into the spotlight which could lead to others realizing their not alone. But we'll see when season three is released.

Important links:

Kenneth Adamswhen interview

RAINN

[lalaloobzy]

Random aspec fictional character HCs

Matthew Cuthbert (Anne With an E)

Asexual + aromantic

Lived his whole life unmarried like his sister but, unlike Marilla, never had any relationships in the past. Doesn't reciprocate Jeannie's feelings and tells her his love for his adopted daughter (Anne) is the only love he has room for. Was TERRIFIED when Anne tried to set him up with Jeannie.

*(this is specific to AWAE but I think it can apply to book Matthew as well)

Selah Summers (Selah and the Spades)

Asexual + aromantic

Tbh this one might be canon (or at least heavily implied). Never has been in a relationship. Admits to Paloma that she's just never been interested in anyone in a romantic or sexual way.

Monkey D. Luffy (One Piece)

Asexual + aromantic

Just doesn't seem remotely interested in romance or sex. Gets grossed out/ annoyed when people kiss in front of him.

*(this is specific to the anime, idk about the manga or live action adaptation)

**(I am not caught up on the anime, this may turn out to be incorrect)

Willie Jack Sampson (Reservation Dogs)

Asexual + aromantic

Never had a love interest or showed attraction in the show (to the best of my knowledge. If she did, I missed it). Also, THIS OUTFIT SPECIFICALLY. Her hoodie is aroace colors and her socks look like a mix of the asexual flag and the aromantic flag.

Lucy Wells (Harlots)

Grey asexual/ greysexual (+possibly aromantic? Maybe demiromantic? I haven't decided yet)

Born into prostitution but HATES sex. Avoids it as much as she can and by the last season finds a way to do her job without having to have sex. The reason I said grey ace is because she DOES seem sexually attracted to Fallon after some time of being with him (I think? I was a little confused about how she felt tbh).

Birdy (Birdy)

Asexual + demiromantic

Everyone in his life thinks it's weird that he's so interested in birds and not girls. Admits to Al he doesn't see the appeal of sex at all. Very reluctant to go to prom with Doris and had no idea what to do when she parked the car and offered him sex. I can see him developing romantic feelings after close friendship (like with Al) which is why I think he's demiromantic.

Bilbo AND Frodo Baggins (The Hobbit/ The Lord of the Rings)

Both asexual (+ maybe demiromantic, though I can also see Bilbo as aro)

Both remained bachelors all their lives. Bilbo lived alone and later with Frodo who was like an adopted son. Frodo lives for a long time with Sam and Sam's wife Rosie. I personally think that Sam and Frodo are in a romantic relationship, while Sam and Rosie are in a sexual relationship. Frodo seems content with this arrangement which is why I believe he's ace.

Ted Buckland (Scrubs)

Asexual

Simply because of the part where Carla says "I don't want any MAN filming me giving birth unless he's completely asexual" and then Ted walks in with a camera and Carla smiles and says "oh hi Ted!". (I think this was a poorly-aged joke about him being "ugly" more than anything but I'm still claiming it). Also when he sings the duet with Gooch and Gooch says "I want to screw you" while Ted says "I want to kiss you.

Fabian Rutter (House of Anubis)

Asexual

He's nerdy and into space (I know this is a stereotype but representation is scarce I take anything I can get... you get it right). Also his relationship with Nina is very innocent and I can't see him developing sexual attraction even when he becomes an adult.

Dirk Gently and Bart Curlish (Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency)

Dirk- Asexual

Bart- Aromantic

Neither of them have love interests in the show (although Bart/Ken may have been implied) so this is just how I felt about the characters personally. I think Dirk definitely had a crush on Todd and is gay but I don't think he gets sexual attraction. Bart is the opposite. I can see her developing sexual attractions and feelings but being repulsed by kissing/ dating etc.

*(this is specific to DGHDA, idk about any other versions of these characters)

Anybody feel free to add thoughts and your personal aspec character hcs <3

[storkmuffin]

Finished Ink Blood Sister Scribe and had what might be my first experience that's analogous to aroace people feeling repulsed by the thought of romance and sexuality. Because it happens in this book! But more on that later.

I've already said that I like the genderflips that the author has decided to make. It's a boy with magic blood being exploited and trapped inside a gothic mansion as an adventurous girl who can't stay anywhere more than 364 days or be truly intimate with anyone travels the world, having scary adventures, all the way to antarctica. He's very fussy about shoes and cashmeres and cologne and is very sheltered. She's an electrician who can get a job at a base in Antartica. And so on.

This fantasy novel is a cobbling together of all the stuff that's been in this author's childhood popular culture, given her birth year (1987). -

There are two sisters of differing magical / powers who are separated by lies told to protect them by their parents and long for each other (Do you want to build a snow man?)

There's an evil type of book that drains people of blood (HP's Monster Book of Monsters with the PG 13 rating taken off).

There's the one legal instrument firmly embedded in the long term memories of all daughters of E.L.James (It's a silencing spell, that's all it is, but everyone calls it an N.D.A).

There's mirror portals (Alice in Wonderland, The Matrix, Dr. Norris and Mr Strange).

Both the male and female protagonists are bisexual (Ao3).

The boy keeps fainting (hot frail boys are hot) while the girl knows a bunch of martial arts (girlboss etc).

One of the most powerful ways of being magical is to be completely immune to magic (Hi Bella Swan, is that you?).

There are name drops of random singers that signify what kind of cool girl this author is - Kurt Cobain and Fiona Apple. Oh, and Smells like Teen Spirit is actually sung acapella in an attempt to create a magical connection (it doesn't work lol).

The fancy english laird doesn't want to return the priceless artifacts bought and stolen from all over the world to their country of origin because he can take care of it better. (Very topical).

The mommy who gives birth to you is not as much as the mommy who adopted you and raised you. (Very modern, very Angelina Jolie).

There are lovingly rendered details of hand crafts like ink-making and bookbinding (very cottage core), as well as an adoration of huge libraries inside big English estate houses (Harry Potter, again, and also Mortal Istruments, which is Harrry Potter).

I liked this very much, by the way. The fact that all these ideas are not in any way original and simply competently assembled did not at all diminish my enjoyment of the story being told. The thrilling, scary bits were thrilling and scary. The magical bits did invoke a sense of wonder or at minimum, curiosity.

THE PROBLEM THOUGH WAS THE STRAIGHT PART OF THE STORY. There's the sister who travels and the sister who stays in the homestead, guarding her dad's library of magical books. The bodyguard of the fussy Englishman, Colin, who is from Boston, is the first man that the librarian sister allows into her home. They ...immediately.... have the true love true blue heterosexual attraction to each other. And they have terrible horrible flirty talk and they kiss and it's like, Wait, What?

Joanna wasn't aroace and somehow didn't go insane living isolated in her house for ten years with just her dad??? She fell hard for the first man not related to her by blood that was ever invited to her house? Plus why the fuck did the author set up all this chemistry beteween Colin and his fancy English charge, the fainting magic blood having boy, who is canon bi???

The no homo of it was so, so awkward and weird. Joanna even asks Colins if he and Nicholas, his charge, aren't a thing and Colins says no, because he likes long hair. He doesn't say he's straight, or that he prefers women, which makes me think the author didn't want to say those things, because it's not true. GIVE ME GAY COLINS. GIVE ME COLINS AND NICHOLAS EXPLORING THEIR BODIES IN THE LIBRARY OF MAGIC BLOOD BOOKS. The quality of the writing for the very gross Joanna and Colin courtship had me writhing with secondhand embarassment as well as disappointment, whereas the rest of the book is snappy and polished.

That tacked on hetero romance, that happens for no reason, kind of ruined the book for me, sad to say. I was so repelled.

[thetooclevermartian]

need to get on my a-spec soapbox for a bit

something that's been on my mind and bothering me is the fact that people are, in a way, gatekeeping characters from being headcanoned as aro/ace. most often i see it manifesting as "this character can't be aro/ace/aroace because they did x!" and it really really bothers me because we a-spec people have such little representation, and when we try to find some for ourselves, even through headcanons, that's taken away from us too.

for example, i saw a post about how katniss everdeen can't be aroace because she married peeta and had kids. (no hate to op btw, i'm just explaining why i disagree strongly). but that statement negates several things. 1) sexual and romantic attraction are spectrums. meaning that some people are going to be on them and still experience sexual and romantic attraction to a degree. they're still a-spec. personally, i headcanon katniss as demiromantic demisexual, meaning she'd need a close emotional bond with someone before she could be attracted to someone in either way. which fits with canon that she is attracted to peeta and also doesn't acknowledge experiencing attraction to anyone else (except maybe platonic attraction with gale but that's another thing). anyway. 2) ATTRACTION IS NOT REQUIRED FOR A RELATIONSHIP. or marriage. or kids. or sex. or kissing. or anything, really. to say katniss can't be a-spec because she does these things erases the experiences of aroaces that do do these things. plus, for younger me, an aroace kid who didn't know he was aroace, seeing a character that wasn't focused on romance at all was important to me. even now, it's still important to me! i'll stand by a-spec katniss because of that!

one that also bothers me, though i see where people are coming from, is kaz brekker and inej ghafa. and though i completely understand not headcanoning them as a-spec, i have seen people shaming the fact that others would interpret them as such. (not to mention i have a-spec headcanons for them both that are supported by canon, but that's a post for another time). in a world where a-spec people have such little representation, why would you try and make us feel bad for looking for it? who does it harm if we headcanon characters as such? i've also seen other people say, "you have tolya and harshaw [other grishaverse characters if you don't know], who are either confirmed or heavily implied, why would you headcanon kaz and inej?" and again, no hate to these people, but have you ever considered that a) i want a wide variety of aro/ace spectrum characters. this includes characters that experience sexual/romantic attraction to some degree, or not at all but still engage in sexual or romantic actions. b) aro and ace people are never the main characters. (and in the case of tolya and harshaw, i'd like there to be more than just two minor characters who are in only 4/9 books combined). because in typical literature and media, main characters have to have romance. they have to have sex, or sexiness, at least. and behind that, they have to have attraction. if they have these things without attraction, they're a slut or a whore or an emotionless robot. c) so often, i am looking for myself in characters, because i know if i don't search, i will almost never explicitly find them.

all this big long stuff to say that i cannot put into words the exact, deep, acute ache i feel when i think about aroace representation and about how little we have. who does it benefit to keep us from finding ourselves and our unique experiences in characters we like? i'm just so exhausted of having my identities' representations stolen from me just because people don't understand what it means to be aromantic or asexual. so for the love of all things, please just let me find happiness in my favorite characters, cause god knows we aren't getting good, varied, common representation anytime soon.

[paradoxcase]

Chapter 25 of Harrow the Ninth

So, the Nook app has decided that now it's going to open on my bigger monitor, which is a bit annoying, since I can't browse the book and write the tumblr post at the same time, but since it doesn't have a windowed mode I'm not sure how to switch it back to my laptop

Ok, never mind, while I was writing that, the Nook app crashed again, and when I re-opened it it opened on my laptop

Aroace rep, but from the character whose main role in the story so far is that he's trying to kill the protagonist for no reason?

Although, speaking of Pyrrha, who we so far don't know anything about except that she was Gideon's cavalier, since Gideon the First is a regular Lyctor he must also be Pyrrha on some level, so possibly some of his odd actions are actually Pyrrha's actions, or are because of Pyrrha in some way, and that's why John thinks they are out of character for Gideon

I guess it could be technically possible that Harrow hallucinated that whole thing, but honestly, it would be boring if all of the weird stuff in this book turns out to be a baseless hallucination. I guess the mystery part of this book is figuring out how much of this Cytherea-related stuff is hallucinations and how much is real

So I guess this means that on the fourth or maybe last day of this ultimatum, Harrow will make Ianthe a bone arm and this problem will be solved?

I can't decide if Ianthe has some sort of Plan to get Harrow to make her a bone arm, or if pretending like she doesn't care is just her way of coping

So Ianthe burns the onions (or at least she says she does) and Harrow just doesn't cook them at all. Also, I get that Harrow wouldn't be familiar with brightly colored vegetables, but wouldn't she also not be familiar with brightly colored candy? Even if they had candy on the Ninth, candy is made in bright colors because people expect good food to be bright colors and that makes the candy look more appetizing. If denizens of the Ninth are not used to brightly-colored food, it doesn't make sense that they'd have brightly colored candy, either

So, I mean, everyone disliked or hated this soup, and we've heard previously that Lyctors don't actually need to eat. I can see the others eating the soup to be polite, but Gideon the First has kind of crossed the line where politeness is going to have any effect by repeatedly trying to kill her. So why did he eat the soup?

Beautiful. If I've understood what John has said about Lyctor mortality well enough, I think he shouldn't have been able to survive this if John hadn't magicked him better, even if I'm wrong and he has no trouble with the necromancy part of Lyctorhood

Please, John, tell us about the last time you ate human being

Unless he's just talking about when Cassiopeia cut off her finger while cooking?

This is a really odd reaction to finding out that Harrow can't sleep for fear of Gideon the First so she is trying to kill him so she can live a normal life? Like, she is his Lyctor, she is blindly devoted to him, he should be pleased that she is this capable in the face of this impossible situation, especially if he really doesn't want Gideon to kill her, because her being capable means she would be better able to protect herself. I wonder if he also is afraid of her hurting him for some reason, for the same reason Gideon the First is? And Mercy's job was not so much to teach her as to do surveillance? Only, if he considered her a legitimate threat, I'm sure he could have just killed her himself at any point, right? Maybe that would wreck the persona of a kindly god that he's projecting, but I almost feel like he could get away with justifying anything at this point. And he asked Mercy if they could put her in the room with him when they fought Number Seven, and Mercy pointed out that that would kill her, there's no way he could have not known that, right?

Also, I'm amused that every time Mercy talks about how young Harrow is, the age gets younger and younger. But her horror that Harrow is so young has definitely made her underestimate her

So I guess this incident reminded Augustine of one of the dead Lyctors? Or Anastasia

Or: "Yeah, that's fair"

Now I'm interested to see if he gets some more characterization in the future

[edwinspaynes]

hey I saw on twitter someone called you a racist , can you post thah anon? I cant believe it how can people be like that

or did you delete the ask?

Hey anon! Thanks for coming to me directly. You're a sweetie <3

You know what, I wasn't going to address this because it's so stupid, but I figure I have nothing to hide.

What happened was I made a joke that was like "if you voted for thomastair (in the least popular ship poll), you're a monster block me." It was intended in the same tone as Will telling Tessa she's a monster for hating chocolate, or me telling one of my best friends she's a monster for not liking ice cream. This did not go over well online since it's hard to indicate tone, and I am an awkward person. I got this anon. You can read my response beside it.

I am sincerely sorry to those who were hurt by my initial comment.

However, this still sits poorly with me because Thomas and Alastair literally have sex on page and are all over each other throughout the book. My intention wasn't to accuse anyone of homophobia, it was to shed light on the way that this was perceived because I quite frankly see no way to perceive Thomastair as platonic.

Even if you don't like them. They're all over each other.

Anyway, I then got this anon:

I didn't reply to it because I was sincerely sorry for hurting their feelings and I didn't want any drama. So I deleted the offending posts, having apologized.

Also, this response has a lot of really obvious flaws, and I originally didn't feel like picking apart the anon in ways that I think are just common sense.

But if I have to reply to this ask, fine.

I don't think Kit is aroace because he's neurodivergent, I think he's aroace because he consistently shows a lack of interest in relationships. Other neurodivergent characters like Henry and Ty are obviously not aroace.

I don't think Grace is aroace because she was abused. Abuse doesn't always make you aroace. I just like her in a qpp with Kit. As for Alastair, he's canonically gay. Attracted to men. They're incomparable in the text.

I do not think Charles is violent. I have specifically said "STATUTORY rape." Alastair was a kid he groomed when he was 14-16. I don't think it was violent, but it's statutory rape.

I fail to see how my thinking that a woman of color (Cordelia) who I adore could do better than a specific white man is racist. I also am not denying that they're in a relationship as anon is doing with Thomastair. Also I'm not a Jordelia anti, I like them fine since Cordelia is happy. I just don't find their dynamic interesting.

As for Jem, don't care. I just don't care about this character. And I never said I wanted to erase him from existence, I just said he's overused in current content and I wish he'd be utilized less frequently.

I also was linked to a post where I'm apparently being fileted for this shitpost:

I don't think this post is controversial, and it also wasn't directed at any one person. In fact, the individual who took offense to it was totally off my radar until like 2 days ago when I was sent the post. They could not be less relevant to me and I definitely have never thought of them when making a post.

Thomastair is just a ship that is to me- and apparently many other people, considering my engagement- synonymous with hope and happiness. Because that's what they represent, hope and second chances and healing. Generic posts like this are just... generic. If someone I haven't thought about in months feels personally attacked, that's not my problem.

This is all I'm going to say about this. I will not be answering more anons about it or addressing any juvenile callout posts that anyone chooses to make. Honestly this experience is mostly funny to me because, like, I am just some random blogger on the internet at the end of the day. The block button is great. Use it.

[theloststarboy]

Hey there, I’m Ian or milo (whatever you prefer they’re both two syllables…) and I’m a film nerd! I’m also a regular nerd, so I wrote a script to scenes from the goldfinch book, that eaither should have been in the movie or I wanted to rewrite.

These scenes were originally written with a freind in mind but they are not capable of filming it, and was intended to be shot with only one actor as I didn’t have a friend that fit well for Theo so I made it seem like it was purely a artistic idea. Not to mention my freind is aroace and I rewrote the kiss scene with the knowledge that she would not feel comfortable doing anything! Yet it can be rewritten for other people to be in it that aren’t voice actors or just out of frame etc.

I Hope y’all enjoy this and I plan on filming it but,..it probably won’t exist for a while haha. (Editing, finding actors, filming, audio and lighting design,..but maybe I can do this as a project for my film class,..)

It’s best seen on computer so formatting may be off if you’re using tumblr mobile, Also tumblr fucks up format all the time script below the cut!!

Warnings for gore, drugs, alcohol, implied abuse.

Note: I google translated some Ukraine for Boris’s scene with his father, if anyone knows Ukrainian please correct me as I only partially know Russian!! Once again ignore formatting issues haha

GOLDFINCH ‘DELETED SCENES’ FILM PROJECT

Written, directed, filmed, and, edited by: Milo G

Boris pavloski: (??? Was gonna be karina…)

SCENE: classroom, you can hear voices talking about the book; walden. bringing up points and counterpoints but the camera focuses on a boy with shaggy black hair, deep sunken cheeks and dark eyebags, his hair is greasy and looks hard to tame, he sat looking bored and uninterested. A student says something.

Boris: Twat.

(He shakes his head like he couldn't believe these people, the camera doesn't leave from the boys face)

Teacher: Did somebody say something back there?

Boris: like thoreau gave a toss about roads

Teacher: thoreau was the first environmentalist

Girl: he was also the first vegetarian

(talking continues and eventually boris lets out a sharp laugh, the teacher and other students continue talking as boris starts to slunk in his chair, grumbling and playing with the leather bracelets on his wrist, the camera faces boris head on.)

(the shot changes to Boris sitting down on the bus, when he sits, he bounces almost like he has no control of his lanky limbs and bones. Like he had just grown into this body. Boris looks over to the seat next to him, and laughs)

Boris: hah, harry potter

(you cant see the boy next to boris, but boris is enamored, clearly wanting to keep the conversation going)

Theo: fuck you

(boris barks out a laugh)

Boris: Where's your broomstick?

Theo: left it at hogwarts. What about you, where's your board?

Boris: eh?

(boris leans into the boy, cupping his ear as to convey that he can't hear him)

Theo: your shirt, there's not much boarding in the desert.

(the boy was wearing a snowboarding shirt, black with some kind of clipart of a man snowboarding(describe better when i actually have the shirt))

Boris: nyah. I just hate the sun

(boris adjusts his hair and leans back in his seat, he seems comfortable with where he is, and doesn't feel the need to adjust to let theo have room on the seat, he wraps his arm around the back of the seat and grins dopily)

(the SCENE moves to boris, he laid awake staring at the ceiling in a dimly lit room the camera is above his head, as if it were on the ceiling, there's a body next to him, but it's too zoomed into him that you cant see him, but you know it's theo. Boris’s eyes are wide as if he's in thought before he shifts his head, facing to where the boy is)

Boris: Potter, you awake?

Theo: Can I ask you something?

(Beat)

Theo: What does the moon look like in Indonesia?

Boris: What are you on about?

(Boris stares at Theo with adoration, a small smile visible through the dim lights)

Theo: or…I don’t know… Russia? Is it just the same here?

(Boris props himself up on his elbow still staring at Theo off screen, he yawns he reaches over and his hand moves off screen, rapping his knuckles onto theos temple a sign for ‘idiot’)

Boris: same everywhere. And why?

Theo: dunno.

(boris rolls his eyes, you can hear yelling in the background, as boris adjusts to look back up at the camera, bouncing softly on the mattress.)

(the SCENE changes once more to boris’s house, still set on boris, he's walking confidently, without worry until he tenses up, and stops walking, the camera stops moving with them abruptly, as if it were expecting them to continue walking.)

Theo: hi.

(Theos voice should sound nervous, shaky. Meanwhile Boris looks terrified, glancing from beside him to theo, to beyond the camera, he takes a step forward, protectively.)

Boris’s dad: hello

(they exchange something in ukrainian,boris should seem confident and formal when speaking ukrainian the translation should be something like “who is this?” “a friend.” “the boy?” “yes.” “ah! Tell him he is welcome anytime, and for holiday, you will stay at his house, yes?” “yes” “where does he live, fathers name?” “four blocks down, big house, under renovation. Larry potter.” translation: "хто це?" "друг." "хлопець?" "так." «ах! Скажи йому, що він завжди рад, а на відпустку ти залишишся в його будинку, так?» «так» «де він живе, ім’я батька?» «Чотири квартали нижче, великий будинок, на ремонті. Ларрі Поттер»).

(Boris watches in a look of disgust, as his dad talks to theo, and he starts to tear up, just a bit when he mentions that theo is like his son, soon after the exchange they leave to boris’s room)

Theo: What was that about?

Boris: believe me. You don't want to know.

Theo: Is he loaded all the time? How does he keep his job?

Boris: high official in the company or something

(Boris was previously looking out a window, he stops when he hears the sound of his dads truck leaving the curtain closes in front of the camera but is quickly changed over to Boris sitting in a chair in the corner of his room.)

boris(continued):”he won't be back for a while. He feels bad for leaving me so much alone. He knows a holiday is coming up, and asked if i could stay at your house”

Theo: well, you do that all the time anyway

Boris: he knows that, that's why he thanks you, but-i hope you don't mind- i gave him your wrong address

Theo: why?

Boris: because I think maybe you don't want him rolling up drunk at your house waking your dad and Xandra up out of bed. Also-if he ever asks-he thinks your last name is potter

Theo: why?

(he seems serious, as if he knows something bad can, and will happen.)

Boris: is better this way. Trust me

Scene: playground.

(boris is swinging softly on the swings, if the ground is shown, a bottle of vodka is placed there. boris is covered in blood and bruised his nose is bloody, and it should be dripping down soaking his shirt. his hands and knees are scraped, his eye is bruised and his hair is sticking to his head due to the amount of blood, and sweat.)

Theo: that was the weirdest thing ive ever seen

(boris leaves the swings to sit onto the ground resting on his scraped hands, staring up at the sky, he sings)

Boris: wszystkie dzieci nawet złe

Pograzone sa we snie

A ty jedna tylko nie

A-a-a a-a-a

He's killed a man once. Beat a man to death in a mine. It's true, in New guinea. He made it look like rocks fell and killed the man. But we still had to leave right after. Not fists. With a uh

(he gestures to hitting like a baseball bat)

boris(cont.): pipe wrench

(beat)

Theo: does it hurt

Boris: What do you think?

(he stands and starts walking, he laughs, a small chuckle that turns to furious laughter before he's gagging on the side of the road he gets up quickly and starts singing again)

Boris:

A-a-a a-a-a

Były sobie kotki dwa

A-a-a kotki dwa

Szarobure--

(he jerks slightly as theo has kicked him)

Theo: english!

Boris: Here I'll teach you. A-a-a a-a-a--

Theo: tell me what it means

Boris: Alright I will, there once were two small kittens, they both were a grayish brown a-a-a oh sleep my darling, and I'll give you a star from the sky. All the children are fast asleep, all others, even the bad ones, all children are sleeping but you. A-a-a a-a-a there once were two small kittens--

(The SCENE changed Boris is staring up , he is on his knees Boris is on the floor of a bathroom whrn he seizes a bloodied hand, it was Theos and the knuckles are bleeding blood dripped down his fingers and dried, cracked. He looks up past the camera, presumably where Theos face was and looking up, presses a soft kiss to his knuckles.)

(the SCENE changes, this time, a side profile of boris, hes talking to theo late at night, outside, theo is speaking frantically, a light illuminates boris’s face softly and his eyes widen, he looks uncomfortable, almost as if he's hiding something, you can still see remnants of his fathers beating, no bruises but on the side of his head is a light scar.)

Boris: potter

(theo stops speaking, and boris leaves the frame, the camera doesn't follow him, his eyes are wide, terrified, he opens his mouth as if to say something, but instead he runs, and the camera doesn't bother to follow him this time, instead, the screen fades to black, and credits roll)

[encrucijada]

wip inspiration tag.

the tag was started by @goose-books

you know i Love to talk. so i might reblog this various times with other wips to show you what inspired them. starting with my current main wip.

i'm kinda bad at keeping track of my inspirations, especially because i tend to take things in parts to inspire my own stories (see: not taking the entire premise of the magnus archives but instead just the concept of things like the hunt or the lonely). so i did my best here!

EVERGREEN LUNG; ezra borja died, then she undied. woke up in the local forest with no memory of what happened and she returns to find out what felt like passing out overnight was a year of being gone, she's missed high school graduation and there is a disconnect now between her and her best friend. with something taking root inside ezra. a story where being aroace is represented through a sentient forest.

HELL FOLLOWED WITH US: i hadn't read hell followed with us before conceptualising the concept of evergreen lung, in part because the book wasn't even out yet. hell followed with us is "queerness as monstrosity for the trans" and evergreen lung is "queerness as monstrosity for the aroaces". both ezra and benji perceived the thing inside them as something separate but we all know that's just a metaphor for who they are inherently. seraph transforms benji's body and the forest makes it so ezra has trouble connecting with people. hell followed with us is just a little more brutal in its body horror because that's part of the book's appeal. but suffice to say i think benji and ezra would get along.

THE RAVEN CYCLE: okay. i would be lying if i said the whole sentient forest idea didn't come from the raven cycle. adam parrish is my favourite character and 90% of it is because he has magic powers linked to a sentient forest. ezra doesn't have psychic powers, though, and her "deal" with the forest has fewer rules and a more blurry line of consent. also not to mention the character of juan diego is adam parrish inspired just because. it's mostly aesthetic though.

MY NEIGHBOUR TOTORO & KIKI'S DELIVERY SERVICE: i included these for the ~vibes~ mostly. my neighbour totoro has some gorgeous nature imagery (that really most studio ghibli movies have i could just include lots of scenery stills from various movies tbh) and i hope to capture that energy of a forest that feels like it could give you a hug. there's also something about the soft and quaint life of the characters. evergreen lung is a very tender book, focusing a lot on atmosphere. ursa from kiki's delivery service is ezra's ideal. both movies also have wholesome family dynamics which ezra has with her parents. you get a sense of how much they mean to each other.

OVER THE GARDEN WALL: there isn't a lot of the vibe of otgw in evergreen lung per se. the vibes of otgw are a little too dark. otgw, however, is the inspiration for the story ezra's parents originate from. so i'm adding it to the roster. i won't be going into detail about what the parents get up to, though those events are technically canon and did happen to ezra's parents. it isn't important and i would rather it stay a mystery you'll only get hints of through the small fantasy aspects of xiomara, katalina and caleb.

tagging: @saltwaterbells @chayscribbles @thelittlestspider @moonssugar @derridaspectres @coffeeandcalligraphy anyone else who wants to do this is welcome to!