#also in s1 when she was pressured/guilted into going on that first date with eldon when james (i think) said how mean she was being to
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Something about Emily being called rude and harsh for the way she handled Eldon basically harassing her, before being guilt tripped for hurting his feelings and then pressured into going on a date with him.
Something about Emily trying to gain Amanda’s trust by pretending to turn against the team, having to to portray herself as incredibly cruel and selfish, and struggling to cope with how easily everyone believed it.
Something about Emily saying goodbye to Michelle, tears streaming down her face, admitting to thinking she’s not kind or compassionate enough on her own, and scared that she won’t be able to be a mentor and a role model without Michelle to guide her.
Something about being a good person at your core, but nobody ever acknowledges it so you don’t even know that you are.
Something about this character who, despite the countless number of times she’s felt it break, genuinely believes she might not have a heart.
#i am having a lot of feelings about emily rn#i just rewatched michelles goodbye episode and this one part really stood out to me#she was like#‘i know i have this (*gestures to brain*) but i don’t know about this (*puts hand on heart*). everyone knows you cant survive without this’#and idk i was reminded of when the team votes for michelle as dance captain in s1 and emilys ‘does everyone really hate me that much?’#also in s1 when she was pressured/guilted into going on that first date with eldon when james (i think) said how mean she was being to#eldon and how much it upset him#which just…. ew#plus in s2 when she’s pretending to be mean to riley to turn the team against her and shes so upset by how easily everyone bought it#like i never realised until i rewatched the goodbye girl today but i think emily really internalised a lot of those moments and genuinely#worries that she’s a horrible person#……#this was heavier and angstier than i meant it to be lol sorry#thanks for reading if you made it this far haha#the next step#emily tns
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