#also i think most of you guys forget poet uses he/they pronouns

[askthe-littlepoet]

"IT SEEMS I'VE MADE A MISTAKE, CAN THE UNIVERSE, SEND ME THE SAME EVIL BISEXUAL ENBY!?"

"I MAY NOT BE HEALED BUT I'M READDDAAYYYYY"

- Imora, 2024

[crestapex]

Hello! I saw a post saying COD matchups are open! If not, please ignore this ^^ Also, I haven't fone a matchup ask in forever, so sorry if I'm rusty...

I'm punk and it really shows in my appearance. I got a red mohawk, and some piercings and tattoos. I like to customise my clothes as much as possible, so battle jackets, studs, chains, pins and patches with slogans and band icons/names are my daily wardrobe.

I'm nonbinary, panromantic asexual and I go by they them pronouns. I'm trilingual and I love learning about stuff, mostly languages and time zones. I am very probably autistic, so I have issues with social interactions as well as sensory issues and I have tics, motoric and vocal. Usually I just chirp, repeat phrases or wave my hands around, twist my neck etc. But sometimes, when I'm anxious, my tics get more violent and I often punch/pinch myself. I struggle with depression a lot as well as some unhealthy coping mechanisms that involve pain, to put it lightly.

I love art, I consider myself a poet, I got one book published and I like to attend poetry competitions. I also draw a lot and paint. I like crafting as well, I have tons of little projects either going on or in my head. I have to journal a lot, because if I don't write it down you can bet I'll forget it :D I also like cooking :)

I love animals, I used to have pet rats and would want them in the future.

I think I'm kind, maybe a bit too much, I would do anything for my loved ones. My MBTI type is INFJ if that helps. I try to make others laugh and feel comfortable, I'm kind of a mix between the parent friend and the clown friend. My love language is words of affirmation and quality time. I tend to get into arguments, because a) people usually take me seriously when I'm being sarcastic or playful (another tism trait), b) because when it comes to things I'm passionate about, I always think I'm right and I have the need to convince the other person that my opinion is better. Also because I get frustrated when people don't get what I mean exactly.

My special interests are horror, in all forms, horror movies, horror books, video essays, deep dives...I like true crime as well and I like to collect bones and other things people often deem creepy (I have a bird skeleton/mummy in a jar).

I think that's it, take as much time as you need, and again, if matchups aren't open, feel free to just delete this <3

You’re all good 👍 (I’m not too familiar with the whole MBTI type of stuff, so I tried my best to look into it, lol.)

I match you with: Rodolfo ‘Rudy’ Parra!

I think he’d be pretty into watching video essays and deep dives with you. Rudy would have no problem setting himself on the couch right beside you, claiming that it keeps him educated and his mind sharp. But really he’d end up passing out in 30 minutes, one of his arms wrapped tightly around you as if you were to magically grow wings and fly away from him. The other resting gently on your arm or thigh if you find yourself sitting practically in his lap. It’s one of the few times he finds himself at true peace and serenity.

Having any shared friends means you guys are definitely referred to as the parents of the group. Drama at the grocery store? Off to go gossip with the two of you! Looking for relationship advice? Once again, off to you and Rudy. And when you guys get into a small, tiny even, slight disagreement in front of your friends? All of sudden it’s the end of the world and everyone is talking about having two christmases. 😐

But also most likely to be the one to bring you down from confrontation or arguments. He will tell you when it’s time to take a step back and calm down, and he’ll continue to talk you down from it and put a comforting hand on your lower back. And if you want to take a moment to continue ranting about it? Go for it, he’ll listen, only to voice his opinion on the situation if you ask for it and/or after you’ve come back down to earth. He’s pretty level headed (especially compared to someone like Alejandro… *side eye*…) and tends to have good judgment like that, so I think that would balance out your relationship, especially if you’re more on the temperamental side.

I can picture him as some sort of gift giver, which I’d imagine would go pretty well with someone who has strong collector tendencies. And they wouldn’t always be the most elaborate and luxurious gifts—though it’s not out of the question—it be something small or something he just found interesting and made him think of you. Think of a gem or crystal he found be sold at a little gift stand, or a small drawstring bag full of bottle caps from all around the world and from all kinds of bottles (that, or he’d be the one to gift you the bottle caps to add a collection, lol).

Loves your artistic side, especially your poetry. Write him little pieces of poetry on a sticky note or torn corner of a piece of paper and he will most definitely keep it in his pocket, only pulling it out to read when he’s alone and missing you—“Oh, mi cielo…” he’d whisper to himself and bring the piece of paper right over his chest, on top his beating heart. He’d close his eyes and let himself be overrun with thoughts of you, even if it’s just for a quick minute before he would have to return back to work. And while you may not believe it’s your best work, Rudy will think it’s one of the most beautiful things he’s ever read.

mi cielo = “my sky” or “my Heaven”

[caveartfair]

The Sad Boys of the Renaissance

Isaac Oliver, Young Man Seated under a Tree, 1590–5. Royal Collection Trust. © Her Majesty the Queen Elizabeth II 2019.

Nicholas Hillard, Young Man among Roses, ca. 1587. © The Victoria and Albert Museum

In 1574, when archetypal Renaissance man Sir Philip Sidney—an English scholar, soldier, aristocrat, diplomat, and prominent Elizabethan poet—was traveling in Italy, he sat for a portrait by the Venetian artist Paolo Veronese. The now-lost painting would have been an invaluable record of a commingling between two giants of the Renaissance. All that remains of their meeting, however, is the testimony of French diplomat Hubert Languet, who found the depiction of his friend too “sad and thoughtful.”

In 16th century Europe, it was fashionable for men to be sad and thoughtful. “Generally the world, as a settled thing, is pleased to grace [sorrow] with a particular esteem,” wrote the French essayist Michel de Montaigne in his aptly titled article “Of Sorrow” (1580). This was doubly the case in England; other nations would come to refer to the phenomenon of male melancholy as “the English malady” or “the Elizabethan malady.”

Male poets including Sidney wrote large bodies of work about their feelings of alienation, isolation, and rejection in love. The English composer John Dowland, famous throughout the continent, is frequently remembered as the first tortured singer-songwriter. His lyrics frequently relate his sadness. In one piece, Dowland describes being locked in a dark prison of his dejection. His self-given motto was Semper Dowland semper dolens: “Always Dowland, always grieving.”

Isaac Oliver, The Three Brothers Browne, 1598. Image via Wikimedia Commons.

In addition to verse and song, fashionable, powerful men wanted their vulnerability captured in paint. Aristocratic sitters who once sought to appear respectable, collected, and straight-backed now let their emotions affect their expressions and demeanors. They stare out at us from paintings by the English artist Nicholas Hilliard and his French-born pupil Isaac Oliver. Their sitters’ intensity is heightened by the intimate medium of the miniature, small paintings meant to be seen by only a few eyes.

In Oliver’s A Young Man Seated Under a Tree (1590–95), a young gentleman dressed predominantly in black, like Shakespeare’s Prince Hamlet, slouches against a tree. His face is serious, conveying both the intensity of his mental state and his desolation. In the background is a stately home with a cultivated Elizabethan garden—genteel but also restrictive. A distant couple walks through the hedge mazes. The sitter, though, is alone.

One of the most familiar and characteristic images of fragile Elizabethan masculinity is Hilliard’s portrait miniature Young Man among Roses (ca. 1587). This flamboyantly dressed man rests a hand on his heart in a display of fidelity as he leans, smolderingly, against a tree, thorny rose vines climbing them both. His pose, situation, and expression evince a poised, possibly self-imposed loneliness. The sitter is thought by many to be Robert Devereux, Second Earl of Essex. A favorite of Queen Elizabeth, Essex was considered the most fashionable man in England—and for a time, the most powerful. He was also known for writing despondent poetry that cast him as particularly unfortunate and lamented his frequent falls from royal favor and affection.

Unknown English artist, John Donne, ca. 1595. © National Portrait Gallery, London.

How did melancholy become so chic? In Elizabethan times, illnesses and one’s own personality were thought to be determined by the balance of four bodily fluids, or humors: blood, yellow bile, black bile, and phlegm. It was an excess of black bile from the spleen that led to a person becoming melancholic in temperament, though sometimes vapors from certain organs were also blamed, as was planetary alignment. Now we are inclined to see melancholy as a catch-all for various types of mental health issues, along with the states of everyday sadness that permeate especially bleak times.

During the Renaissance, mortality rates were high and plagues frequent; constant religious wars caused internal as well as civil unrest. Seasonal Affective Disorder was certainly a factor. In the middle of the 16th century, Europe underwent a period of cooling now called the Little Ice Age. England—never flush with sun—was even grayer and colder than usual, with shorter days. During this time, suicide rates were at an all-time high.

While it was often considered a serious malady, for the most part, melancholy became a desirable, romantic disposition for a young man. Those afflicted were supposed to be pale (caused by blood rushing away from the head to the heart, a belief promoted by the English physician Thomas Willis). They were often found to stare into space, their eyes fixed. They got no sleep. In an anonymous portrait from around 1595, the English Metaphysical poet John Donne looks abstractedly yet intensely away from the viewer. His face is framed by the darkness of his hat, his clothes, and the background, which seem to move over him in a black mist.

Nicholas Hilliard, Unknown man against a background of flames, c. 1600. © Victoria & Albert Museum.

Nicholas Hilliard, Portrait of Henry Percy, Ninth Earl of Northumberland, c. 1594–5. Image via Wikimedia Commons.

Melancholics were liable to obsession; love was spoken about as a sickness that could only be cured by the submission of its object of affection. Encoded in this amorous attitude was a certain brand of misogyny and toxic masculinity—the women who didn’t return these mens’ amorous feelings are cast as villains. As to habitat, you’d find these somber boys wandering alone, sighing in gardens and hedged labyrinths, in forests and by streams. Forgetting to dress oneself—a sign of distraction or desolation—was turned into a studied style.

The pale lover with an earring in An Unknown Man (ca. 1600), attributed by different scholars to both Hilliard and Oliver, not only has his collar undone, but wears no doublet—a wanton gesture that was essentially the equivalent of sending a nude—as he stands among the flames of his own passion. He stares with eyes eternally “fixed” on the onlooker, presumably the paramour who owned the miniature. Though his damp hair betrays that he is visibly affected by the heat, it doesn’t yet have the strength to overwhelm his facial pallor. The lovesick young man turns his locket toward his chest—the source of his exquisite pain—thereby bringing the face of his beloved to his own flaming heart.

In Oliver’s cabinet miniature of Lord Herbert of Cherbury (ca. 1613–14), who was another one of those overachieving poet-scholar-soldiers, the subject holds a shield brandished with a flaming heart. A compendium of melancholic symbols of romantic despair, the work pictures Lord Herbert reclining by a brook in a solitary wood. His shirt is open, tassels hanging, and his head rests in his hand.

Albrecht Dürer, Melencolia I, 1514. Courtesy of The Metropolitan Museum of Art.

Unknown Artist, Man in Mourning for Sir Philip Sidney, c. 1587. Image via Wikimedia Commons.

As well as the mark of a lover, melancholy was seen as proof of other accomplishments and innate qualities like intellect, seriousness, and nobility. In his 1621 book Anatomy of Melancholy, Robert Burton says there “is no greater cause of melancholy than idleness.” It was socially useful, then, to appear melancholic if you aspired to give off an air of moneyed leisure.

Hilliard wrote one of the first English-language books about visual art, The Arte of Limning, around 1600. In it, he categorized himself as suffering from episodes of “mallancholy” and “passions of sorrowe and greefe.” He was an ambitious man, keen for painting to be considered a gentleman’s art rather than a laborer’s craft. That he cast himself as depressed in some ways proves his aspirations.

The Aristotelian principle that genius and melancholy were linked was perfectly suited to ideals of Renaissance humanism. Early 16th-century depictions of melancholy—usually as an allegorical woman—are mysterious. They exude a poised intellectualism, but employ levels of symbolism that are now lost on us. In Albrecht Dürer’s famous 1514 engraving Melencolia I, an androgynous, winged figure with a furrowed brow and skillfully shadowed face in hand, sits with the trappings of various humanist disciplines around her.

Melancholy, 1532. Lucas Cranach the Elder Statens Museum for Kunst

The figure is usually described with feminine pronouns, but the hair and facial features are similar to that of Dürer himself, who, in his autobiography, cast himself as a child prodigy. Many subsequent thinkers of his time tended to agree with the artist’s self-assessment. One of his admirers was Hilliard, for whom Dürer was a guiding spirit. For many art historians today, this work represents the moment the idea of the melancholy genius was solidified in Western art. From that point on, melancholy seems to have become a decidedly masculine affair.

The pose of the gloomy intellectual has remained a fashionable one for men ever since. So, too, has that of the alienated man whose sense of rejection, whether social or romantic, is somehow flipped to make him seem more eligible or desirable. The body of visual art that captures this way of thinking seems especially relevant again in an age of increased awareness about men’s mental health and social conditioning, but also the employment of their sensitivity and vulnerability as “nice guys.”

As they peer out at us from their portraits, these Elizabethan sad boys seem to embody John Donne’s immortal opening words from his poem “Witchcraft by a Picture”: “I fix mine eye on thine, and there / Pity my picture burning in thine eye.”

from Artsy News

[cuddlingsun]

hello @ciaoloueh​ (or her phansona, danielbear) has tagged me to do this thingy and it’s long bUT THATS FINE BECAUSE I FIXED IT SO NOW I CAN MENTION PEOPLE AND DO A READ MORE AND LIFE IS BEAUTIFU

Rules: Once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. At the end, choose 25 people to tag!

THE LAST… 1. Drink: water! I tried to drink some after waking up (and another sip just now) because who knows if I drink enough it might be a step to being healthier

2. Phone call: my mom, who called to ask what kind of math my brother has

3. Text message: cbs™ got a very excited text about how i can mention people now, it’s truly revolutionary 

4. Song you listened to: green light by lorde i think

5. Time you cried: i remember crying in my dream last night but can’t remember the actual time sorry

HAVE YOU EVER… 6. Dated someone twice: nope

7. Been cheated on: nope

8. Kissed someone and regretted it: nope

9. Lost someone special: yup

10. Been depressed: well I think so, but like it wasn’t officially diagnosed and all, do feel tons better rn even if it isn’t all that amazing yet

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS:

12. dark red

13. dark blue

14. the purple/olive green/brown aesthetic that hana gave me lmao

I JUST LOVE A LOT OF THINGS OKAY FIGHT ME

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… 15. Made new friends: yes! though the real life ones aren’t proper friends but the online ones are I guess :D

16. Fallen out of love: sort of??? maybe it was before this past year so idk let’s say no so I feel better about it

17. Laughed until you cried: i’d sure hope so

18. Found out someone was talking about you: ha yes but not that i care too much about it, trying to not have any contact with those people anyway

19. Met someone who changed you: not sure, don’t think so

20. Found out who your true friends are: sort of? i kind of decided to not try too hard for people that don’t try for me? like there’s a difference between being scared to start conversations and just generally not caring abt me as a person u know

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: nope

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: i’m going to count it hold up -- 44 out of the 51 

23. Do you have any pets: sadly no

24. Do you want to change your name: sort of did but not anymore? i like to use bus because it’s easy and a nickname but i can live with my name i guess (though maybe change the official spelling lmao)

25. What did you do for your last birthday: i had some friends over and had a chilled out get together (and my mom had cooked dinner) which was nice I guess (also two of my friends got me a book which nearly made me cry but all right)

26. What time did you wake up: around nine I think? woke up around 6.25 then around 8.06 and then somewhere before 9.30 (i’m being specific if u care to read this far you won’t mind anyway)

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: trying to sleep by daydreaming 

28. Name something you cannot wait for: I cannot wait for a bunch of things but myself aside i can’t wait for one direction to come back?? which sounds selfish i mean i love their solo careers but boys i miss u 

29. When was the last time you saw your mother: last night when she had made some tea but it was too sour for me and then i went to bed (i just went downstairs and saw her again, if that makes u happier)

30. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: we can’t get into this now fully, but i feel like having tons of money could make a big change to my current situation

31. What are you listening to right now: nothing tbh (also changed to green light when i came back, i was halfway through)

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: lmao yes he helped teach maths at uni which was cool i guess

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: me but also in general the state of the world, but also me a lot

34. Most visited website: tumblr probably lmao 

35. Elementary: was cool I guess, i had a real good year and then it was shitty again but overall could have been worse

36. High School: wasn’t the best, could’ve been worse. i don’t really feel any type of Big Feelings towards any of these

37. College/university: sadly didn’t finish the one thing, so next year i’m starting law? (wish me luck tbh) and afterwards i want to genuinely study physics/chemistry at some point again but who knows if it will happen and when 38. Hair colour: brown

39. Long or short hair: short, but it’s been growing quite a lot

40. Do you have a crush on someone: not that i know of and boy is it good i love it finally time to focus on MYSELF am i rite ladies

41. What do you like about yourself: my mind mostly, physically i don’t LIKE anything but i’m not in full hatred either so there’s that 

42. Piercings: i had my ears pierced but i don’t wear jewelry so 

43. Blood type: i believe O but i’m not sure and don’t know the positive/negative thingy

44. Nickname: lmao hana literally referred to me as bus here so that, don’t really have any others?? bush but i don’t really like that one so

45. Relationship status: single and v v v v happy with that

46. Zodiac sign: libra

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favourite TV show: brooklyn nine-nine, merlin, elementary (and well doctor who, victoria and dirk gently too) (also liked selfie?? and atlantis, galavant, agent carter)

49. Tattoos: none  50. Right or left hand: right (though i want to learn writing with both hands tbh)

FIRST… 51. Surgery: i think they did something with my ears when i was really really young so I don’t even remember it (and i’m scared of surgery so let’s keep it this way)

52. Piercing: the one but also none u feel 

54. Sport: i did ballet which i loved but then i had to stop or go on with people who were like two or three years older than me and were way better so i quit

55. Vacation: i mean i went to turkey every year even as a tiny baby i think so that probably? 

56. Pair of trainers:  i was a tiny child, how should i remember this

57. Eating: ah okay not first so um had a tiny bit of chocolate but still deciding on breakfast 

58. Drinking: the water is still there, i’ll take a sip now

59. I’m about to: figure out what to read whilst i hide from the cleaning lady for three hours (and probably eat something first) 

60. Listening to: currently it’s royals also by lorde 

61. Waiting for: a simple thing rn because we’re not that deep yet: a burst of motivation to go shopping tonight with my sister and her friend

62. Want: general Big Life Things, but also just books??? i fucking love books NO FUCK I WANT TIME LOTS OF TIME SO I CAN DO EVERYTHING I WANT TO DO

63. Get married: not planning to but who knows life is weird

64. Career: okay look the most ideal one would be a scientist and an author but we all know studying law won’t get me there so we’re still figuring it out, but scientist and author??? especially scientist??? id die for that man

YOUR TYPE… 65. Hugs or kisses: currently feeling a good hugs (woah, we would never have guessed tumblr user cuddlingsun)

66. Lips or eyes: eyes i guess?? 

67. Shorter or taller: taller??? look I don’t Know these things 

68. Older or younger: probably older??? but also like younger is fine??? idk

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: I DON’T KNOW EITHER HANA whichever one that person wants??? like i’m not very specific on these things

71. Sensitive or loud: sensitive I guess but like hana said, you could be both

72. Hook up or relationship: relationship lmao what would i get out of a hookup except for years of pining

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant, but also a teeny bit mischievous otherwise i’d get bored  --------- keeping hana’s answer here

HAVE YOU EVER… 74. Kissed a stranger?: nope

75. Drank hard liquor?: nope

76. Lost glasses contact/lenses: i lost a lens once when i slept with them in accidently, but later found it on my pillow (i think) which was quite odd

77. Turned someone down: HA if we’re HONEST yes but like,,, i was twelve,,, he was weird,,, let’s forget it ever happened 

78. Sex on first date: um no -- hana catching my feelings perfectly

79. Broken someone’s heart: well that would be a maybe but i hope not lmao

80. Had your heart broken: L M A O yes way too easily

81. Been arrested: nope

82. Cried when someone died: yes, though it usually takes other people crying for me to Get There

83. Fallen for a friend: yes? no? idk what came first but honestly i’d like to have it be a friend rather than a stranger lmao

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… 84. Yourself: in all honesty no, but i’m trying to

85. Miracles: yes, in a way

86. Love at first sight: sort of?? like not love exactly but a feeling that turns into actual love yeah that’s possible i guess 

87. Santa Claus: nope, but i dont remember if i ever believed in him to begin with so i should ask me mum probably

88. Kiss on the first date: idk??? 

89. Angels: yeah i mean yeah with the religion thing and stuff i guess that’s a yes 

OTHER… 90. Current best friend’s name: honestly idk like i have many best friends and i don’t really have a solid best friend anymore but that’s fine because i lov so many people anyway

91. Eye colour: also brown

92. Favourite movie: don’t??? but all righty some time ago i’d have said spongebob the movie so that, hidden figures, prisoner of azkaban, dead poets society, brave (also pride and prejudice & austenland probably)

i tag @bothhappy--andsad because she usually wants to do these kinds of tags and if they want to: @ryanperch @floralaesthetlc @klainederful cus u guys are super cool and i wanna know if you care to do it (and anyone else that wants to do it can say i tagged them cus i wanna READ)