#also i feel like ppl must have been intimidated by me bc they never tried to do anything to me and they were generally respectful

[straightlightyagami]

being a Known Snitch in high school was a somewhat isolating experience . yall dont know how hard we annoying teachers pets had it…

[crossdressingdeath]

This isn't necessarily abt LSZ, byt it annoys me when ppl are like " you must forgive the ppl who wronged you in order to be a good person"

Bcs some were raised passive, some are used to letting go, and learning to love yourself enough to be angry abt what happened is a rlly important and powerful message

I won't argue abt canon, bcs i have fic for it, but, as healthy as it is, it's also frustrating. LSZ has never been shown as a particularly assertive person, and him being angry at what happened would have been satisfying and shown that he's learned the lesson of not tearing yourself down for other's comfort ( which is more WWX to learn than his tbh, but whateves)

JL, on the other hand, who's angry and assertive and doesn't listen to anyone, him choosing to forgive and forget ( WWX) feels more powerful narratively, bcs it's an active choice, not something that's been trained into him, he chose to let go of the anger before to be more happy

So yeah, I've seen a lot of arguments, but i think this is what boils down to. We want passive characters, those who stood and suffered to get angry and validated, because so few of us ever get the chance to

Except... here's the thing. LSZ didn't learn to "tear himself down for others' comfort". He's a peacemaker, yes, he tries to resolve fights, yes, but that's just because he's the sort of person who prefers peaceful resolutions. Come on, that kid was raised by LWJ. I don't doubt for a second he was spoiled rotten. I think people forget that someone preferring to be quiet and gentle isn't the same as being passive; LSZ doesn't assert himself because... well, he doesn't particularly want to. He lets LJY do it for him, most of the time. I have on multiple occasions seen people insisting there's something wrong with LSZ/WWX and LWJ's parenting because LSZ doesn't like to start fights over things that don't matter at the end of the day, and like... there's nothing wrong with being the type to forgive others and let things go, so long as it isn't taken into doormat territory. LSZ chooses to forgive the Lans for their part in his family's deaths, because the Lans a) played a pretty small part on balance and b) have raised and protected him with love and care his entire life when they didn't actually have to do that; I'd argue that's just as powerful as JL forgiving WWX. It's just quieter. And LSZ does assert himself; he's just quiet about it. He doesn't shout like JL does, but he doesn't let himself be ignored either! Remember, it's LSZ who keeps the juniors from making a huge thing about LWJ tying WWX up with the forehead ribbon; the fact that he did it with a smile on his face and without ever raising his voice doesn't make that not assertive! In fact he seems to be the leader of the multi-sect duckling contingent; they all listen to him, even JL at least some of the time (which is more than most people get). Assertiveness and aggression are not synonymous.

So I guess what I'm saying is... why is it that JL is seen as assertive when he shouts and cries but can never get people to do what he wants (he can't even get LJY to stop calling him 'young mistress'!), while LSZ is seen as passive when he actually does get people to do what he wants without ever raising his voice? Why are screaming, crying tantrums (I love JL but. they are tantrums) assertive while calmly taking control of the group and leading them down the path you've decided is passive? Why should LSZ have to scream his anger to the heavens for it to be real? He's not angry at LWJ and WWX, because why would he be? He's not angry (or at least not more angry than anything else) at the Lans, because they're the family that raised him well. Why does it follow that he's not angry at the people actually responsible, people he never talks to and so has no opportunity to openly tear down for causing his family's deaths? And remember, LSZ temporarily leaves the sect to travel with WN (which he as a disciple would've had to get permission to do, by the way; I'd argue that going to LQR and saying "Hey, I'm gonna fuck off to Qishan with my fierce corpse uncle to learn more about my birth family" counts as asserting yourself!); it's partly to learn about his birth family, but I don't doubt he also wanted time to think about things away from the Lans.

You say his "passivity" is something LSZ was trained into, but... come on, look at the Lans. These are the most stubborn assholes in all the sects. They wouldn't be teaching him to be passive, they'd be teaching him to keep his cool while verbally eviscerating his enemies. He was raised to be polite and to show his elders the deference due to their age and experience; that doesn't make him passive. The only time we see him being anything close to passive is when Madam Mo is hurling insults at him, and I'd say that's more "customer service" than any actual passivity. He's expected not to make demands of his elders (hence why he doesn't go off on JC beyond the bounds of "Hanguang-jun says"), but I say again: he's clearly the social leader of his group. He's not passive, he just follows the example of his uncle (who once got two men who hated each other to swear oaths of brotherhood to make him happy; it wasn't a wise move in the long run, but it's impressive he got as far as he did!) and gets what he wants through diplomacy, rather than being intimidating enough to force people to do what he wants.

I... don't actually know where I'm going with this. I guess I just get annoyed whenever people talk like there's something wrong with LSZ (usually something about him being too passive) when... he's probably one of the mentally healthiest characters in the whole cast! This boy was raised well among people who love and care for him and because of that he's doing really well! He doesn't yell and cry when things don't go his way like JL because he was raised in an environment where he was treated with respect as a person, and he forgives the Lans not because he's been raised to passively take whatever's done to him as deserved (like WWX) but because he loves them, because they earned that love by being good to him. Why should that be seen as passive just because he doesn't yell about it?

[surejo]

( victoria pedretti, cis woman ) hey ! have you seen JOSEPHINE “JO” CORMAC around ? SHE works at the HOT COCOA STAND at big bear resort, but they must be off their shift by now. well, if you do see them can you let me know ? they’re 24 years old & they’ve been working here for TWO YEARS. they tend to be +OPTIMISTIC & +EMPATHETIC, but can also be -IMPRACTICAL & -PASSIVE. the other employees have labeled them THE IDEALIST. thanks a lot ! ( the few nights the stars can be seen, books worn down by dog-ears and marks left throughout the years, the first crisp breeze of autumn, the duality… of t.s. eliot ) 

OK. a few notes before i get started:

1) i hope everyone loves how i literally j copied my ivan stuff. url format? ‘sure jan’ lives on. theme? too lazy to find a different one that’s easy to work with. luv that for me. 2) speaking of this theme i forget if i addressed this on ivan’s blog but tabbed bullets don’t appear tabbed.... so if anything seems like it doesn’t make total sense.... it is supposed to be tabbed™. 3) get ready for drama!!!!! you may ask yourself “but the app looks so tame! there will be no drama!” but you are wrong........ because she loves cats. the t.s. eliot book......... the musical........ even the movie.

ok jo,, is also a resurrected character,,, hence how i already kno,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, that she loves cats. anyway ! let’s begin ! (listen,,,, the intro format will at least be a little different from ivan’s ok im evolving)

QUICK FACTS:

full name: josephine “jo” rose cormac

date of birth: march 6, 1995

*does not perfectly reflect the below big three zodiac chart because that’s too much math

zodiac big three: pisces sun, gemini moon, cancer rising

gender & pronouns: cis woman & she/her

sexual orientation: bisexual ( preference for women bc we luv that for her but we also luv leaving things open to chemistry )

education: bachelor in english - literature that she is doing nothing with

enneagram: 2w1

mbti: infp

various inspirations: eleanor crain ( the haunting of hill house ), dolores price *as a child and towards the end of the book ( she’s come undone ), fox 8 ( fox 8: a story ), “why try to change me now?” - fiona apple (cover), “be still” - the killers

BACKGROUND INFO:

triggers: verbal/mental/emotional abuse/gaslighting, very slight implication of spousal abuse, brief mention of car accident/death & drowning

( ivan and jo’s breakout pop-punk single: “fuck happy backstories!” stream it on spotify ! )

jo......... was born into the wrong family, let’s get that out of the way.

it was pretty clear she was a ploy to save the marriage of her parents ( who have names: lucy and benjamin, luv that for them ). it didn’t seem like they’d ever picked up a parenting book, gone to a parenting class, rly prepped for being a parent at all...... in their entire lives.

that being said, her mom was actually decent at parenting. her major flaw, though? ok, so you know how kids usually have that one bedtime story that they love and want it to be read to them over and over? well lucy complied ! but y’all wanna know what that book was ?

t.s. eliot’s “old possum’s book of practical cats” whfeiuldjkn

anyway ! when jo was seven, after many failed attempts and simple threats, her mom was finally divorcing benjamin for realz. due to his volatile nature, it was becoming very clear that she was the more fit parent and she almost got sole custody ( the only reason benjamin was motivated for it in the first place was the power so?? )! how exciting!

but the keyword is ‘almost’!

alexa, play ‘my heart will go on’ but the off-tune flute version

just as the proceedings were going through, jo’s mother was hit by a drunk driver on new year’s eve. the car skidded onto some ice, minimal damage done... then the ice broke.

jo and benjamin both devolved after that. jo withdrew more into herself and pretty much coped by..... just reading old possum’s a LOT (hate that for her). all mopey, benjamin became much less outwardly violent. the keyword is ‘outwardly.’

ya, instead of j bein like “i will just chill” he was like “i will just make my rage more subtle because in this house, we love intimidation, manipulation, hostility, the blame game, and gaslighting! uwu” managed to convince jo that her mother’s death was somehow her fault, that he was the only person she could trust, that she will never be able to live without someone else, etc., etc.

a few years in and a cycle of many impromptu sleepovers began. luv that for her. hate that for her, but luv that for her. 

there is a lot i cld talk abt here, but it all seems like it cld j be tl;dr’d as: “basically became the surrogate daughter of a bunch of other people”

as for things that r not tragique™, jo was v much a drifter when it came to friends. managed to make a fair amount bc she does not seem like she will put a tadpole in ur hand like ivan. also j a people-pleaser but that’s starting to get into her personality which is another section.

did go to college. luv that for her. has NO CLUE what she’s going to do with her degree, but she can make some really sick niche william faulkner jokes. 

began seasonally working at big bear during the winter break of her last year in college because bitch needed some money!! wound up loving it and was like “i think,,,, i will continue to do this,,,, the people here,,,, r cul,,,,”

still visits benjamin every once in a while. not a way to say that uwu you should forgive ur abusive parent(s) uwu rather that jo.... still has slight belief in him. just to end on something emo.

THE REST IS HISTORY!!!!

TL;DR:

started life out as a saddie, not a baddie. still not a baddie, but no longer as much of a saddie. loves “cats” and there is no irony to that statement. can make good niche literary jokes, but that’s about it.

PERSONALITY/MISCELLANEOUS INFO:

a child. a literal child. a child to the point that she should have supervision when she goes on grocery trips because she falls for marketing ploys so easily. can’t believe she hasn’t fallen into a pyramid scheme yet.

an absolute dumbass. again, can make some great niche william faulkner jokes, but ask her the order of the planets? “...well mars is somewhere in there.”

unironically LOVES cats - both the musical and movie. thinks jennifer hudson’s grizabella is the best. will start sharing random facts about it or old possum’s book of practical cats if she runs out of things to talk about but feels pressured to keep talking. was broken when she first read a different t.s. eliot poem and realized he was actually super dark. the only thing that got her through it was a comparison to batman :\ bruce wayne is old possum’s, batman is everything else.

to take a brief break from fun personality facts, v down on herself bc benjamin’s words rly!! stuck with her!! convinced she is an absolute idiot and does not trust her own memory. v indecisive bc of this and always longs for someone to help her figure things out. tries to distance herself from memories of her mother because, again, benjamin got to her. her love of cats doesn’t help that, but... can you believe that’s her coping mechanism? makes up for it by giving all of her love 2 everyone else!! we love tragedy!! and needing to go to therapy!!

secretly knows her love of cats is weird and dumb. a part of her knows why it’s considered one of the worst musicals ever. but LISTEN. we luv rly weird coping mechanisms!

big dreamer. will develop the most impractical goals. she usually knows they are impractical, but still..... uwu

has decided everyone is good until proven bad! except for,,,, like,,, murderers and rapists,,,,

is #StraightEdge for the most part,,,, literally has a drink maybe three times per year

says “like” a whole lot for someone who majored in english with a concentration in literature and should therefore be more eloquent.

i am not great at these sections!! feel free 2 j refer to her zodiac, personality tests, and character influences!!

literally fox 8. i put the others there bc she’s similar but wow,,,, if u read fox 8 (it’s a short story i recommend it i luv george saunders u can find a pdf online),,,, she is fox 8. 

here u go here is a sample that doesnt need context: "Fox 4 woslike: No ofense, Fox 8? Your ideas are not super praktikal. Dreem, dreem, dreem, said Fox 11. Fox 41 woslike: Fox 8, does this honestly never get old for you?"

OH ALSO. she has a slet. a cat,,,,, named asparagus,,,, whom she calls “gus”,,,,, and y’all know WHY.

recent development: has downloaded tor so she can get on the dark web. why? because she thinks there will be more funny animal videos on there. is shockingly good at navigating it.

CONNECTION IDEAS:

close friends bc we luv that –– roman (nuanced), aylie (nuanced), hazel (nuanced), cleo (nuanced), vic (nuanced), marco (nuanced)

childhood friends whom she possibly had impromptu sleepovers with bc that is v soft and,,,,, y’all i left the city blank for a reason. –– hazel, marco, 

on that note, the person who was like “wait,,,,,,, u know that book was turned into a musical right,,,,,, like,,,,, a musical literally everyone knows” and shook jo’s world

good influence / bad influence –– cleo, vic, 

~*confidant*~

roommate

exes –– ian,

reciprocated pining

unreciprocated pining

someone..... who has accepted..... that she likes cats.... in a way that is not ironic. will see the movie with her. –– aylie, 

an enemy,,,,,, aka this person was like “cats is literally the worst thing in the entire world” and now they r on jo’s very short hit list –– riley

idk!!! im also obvs up for brainstorming!!! luv that!!!

** descriptive connections page is here ( only people who i’m messaging are on it, but i ?? would love to plot w everyone ?? so don’t make the short list make u think i’m trying 2 limit it 2 these ppl auhfoeidla )

LIKE THIS OR HMU TO PLOT !

[jungnoir]

NCT Lucas bullet point headcannon as a bad boy or bodyguard you can pick

a/n: alright here we go with this loser

bad boy!yukhei,,, thinks he’s hot shit

he is Not

definitely can walk the walk of a bad boy being what,,, six foot,,, a Beanpole,,, also those strong ass eyebrows are kinda intimidating all on their own

and while yeah, he totally pulls off the all black look and has probably mentioned his pocket knife like five times in conversation with another guy who also thinks he’s hot shit, yukhei has never been one to really do anything serious

he has a loud and authoritative voice that, when paired with his towering height and death glare, makes any fool run for the hills

but it’s like,, it’s always the people who he doesn’t know that think he’s some ruffian

meanwhile, his closest friends could flick him in the forehead and yukehi would probably crumble into a heap on the floor

jungwoo is his best friend, and when ppl see the two of them hanging out, they’re always super confused bc??? sweet and soft-tempered jungwoo?? whose laugh is equivalent to a thousand fairies singing lullabies and who is head of his school’s gardening club?? friends with big bad boy wong yukhei? it’s more likely than you think

whenever ppl ask jungwoo what yukhei is really like yukhei is always like “hey,,, dude,,, pls tell them i can bench press 350,,,” and jungwoo is like “man i saw you almost collapse under the weight of my fat cat the other day, be realistic”

so instead of lying to save yukhei’s pride, jungwoo just tells them that they should get to know yukhei for themselves and find out on their own

and, well, that’s all fine and dandy but getting to know yukhei is harder than just saying hello and starting a conversation like you would other ppl

after all, he has a reputation to uphold

and that sometimes means that he keeps the cold, indifferent attitude turned up all the way at all times

but this isn’t helpful when you’re tasked with inviting people to join your friend jisung’s new gaming club because the only people that had joined so far were you, chenle, jeno, and mark out of pity

so jisung is like hey!!! can you look around for some people to invite to my club? and you end up coming across jungwoo because you know he’s relatively friendly and who knows, maybe he likes games too

but when you ask him he’s like oh! i know someone who likes games

and you get really excited bc a lot of the ppl you’ve asked so far don’t really care about gaming, so if you could find at least one person who was willing to check out the club, jisung wouldn’t totally roast you for your recruiting skills

but then jungwoo is like “yukehi is a big fan of video games, you should ask him” and your mood just drops

but jungwoo, used to the reactions people get when he talks about yukhei, is already prepared for the look on your face and quickly begins to reassure you

“i know he looks like this big scary dude, but i swear he’s just fronting. the dude wouldn’t hurt a fly, and definitely not you. just ask and if he says no, you can at least say you had the guts to go near him, alright?”

you tell him you will, if only to not diminish the hope in his eyes, and then slink off, totally set on just going back to jisung empty-handed rather than facing the possibility of yukehi biting your head off for bothering him

only,, to bump into yukhei,, on your way back to the classroom

yukhei was staring at his phone when he turned the corner and bumped you, making the item fly out of his hand and onto the floor between the both of you

immediately, you apologize and proceed to drop down to grab his phone but he does too

and your heads unceremoniously knock into the other’s with such force that you fall out on the floor due to the momentum of the hit

you immediately cry out in pain and then you suddenly feel arms curling underneath you…. hoisting you into a lap

there’s a soft voice in your ear and you raise a hand to your forehead to stop the sudden swimming feeling you feel, your vision a little blurry as you try to blink away the pain. you can’t discern what’s being said, just that someone sounds very panicked and worried

finally, you feel a little more together and your vision focuses

and there is yukhei, arms under you and tucking you into his chest as he looks over you in worry, his words a little clearer as he says “please tell me i didn’t kill you”

you hum and frown, squinting at him as the fluorescent lights above the both of you sting your eyes

“i’m not…… dead…. u just hit me really hard… your skull is extremely tough…..” you grumble, and you really must not be in your right mind if you’re talking to wong yukhei like this, someone you would avoid eye contact with if you ever passed him in the halls

despite your preconceived notions about him however, he just breaks into a really boisterous laugh that catches you off guard

he laughs so hard that he has to cover his mouth to muffle the sound, removing one of the arms he has holding you to him from underneath you to do so

“you sound an awful lot like my best friend” he says, still snickering

when you feel like you’ve regained yourself once more, you suddenly feel embarrassed for laying in his lap, staring up at him as he checks you over and makes sure you won’t suddenly pass out on him “you really are good, right? you won’t faint on your way home and then sue me later, will you?”

you furrow your brows, “n-no, I really am okay… actually, I was meaning to talk to you”

he blinks at you, tilting his head to the side, “what about?”

patting around your pocket on your pants, you reach a hand down into your pocket and pull out the small flyer that jisung had created for his club, holding it out to him

yukhei takes it and looks it over before his eyes widen, “you’re in a gaming club??”

and you just nod slowly, waiting in worry for what he might say next

“i didn’t know the school had one! i have to join, i’m so sick of playing against jungwoo. he really sucks at multiplayer games ya know…… hey are you headed there?” he’s spouting off his words in excitement, and while you have a little trouble keeping up with him, you definitely catch the last part

you affirm that you’ll show him where it is and begin to slide out of his lap, ready to get up and lead him to the room when yukhei suddenly moves in front of you and crouches

you stare at his leather jacket clad back and lose a little of your breath when he cranes his neck over his shoulder and beams at you with the brightest smile you’ve ever seen, something you never would have thought wong yukhei of all ppl would ever be capable of showing, “aren’t you gonna climb on? you’re in no condition to walk like that”

and you’re just like,,, i didn’t break my legs yukhei i can walk

but also,,, how many ppl can say they got a piggy back ride from the wong yukhei in their lifetime

plus the fool won’t get tf up off the floor

so you relent and climb on, all the while v much flustered

he takes a hold of your thighs with an iron grip and honestly, you might’ve believed jungwoo if he told you yukhei could bench press 350

and so you end up walking into jisung’s club with yukhei piggy-backing you, eyes all wide and excited as he walks up to the much younger boy and is like “hey!! i ran - literally - into your friend here and they told me about this club, can i join???”

jisung doesn’t quite know what to process first: yukhei wanting to join his gaming club, the big bad boy at school who looked like he stole children’s candy for fun, or the fact that you were riding on his back like it was another day in the life for you

you just make an “i don’t know either” face over yukhei’s shoulder at jisung and the younger boy gets up and starts to smile nervously, welcoming yukhei to the club

and so, weirdly, from that day on, yukhei is just part of jisung’s gaming club

it becomes part of your daily routine to see him hanging around jisung, discussing some game from the 90′s and bantering like “it’s a classic!” “you weren’t even born when that game came out, jisung” “neither were you!” or seeing yukhei with his legs kicked up on a chair in the club meeting room as he tries to throw popcorn into his own mouth (because once donghyuck joined the club, they were constantly trying to one up the other in everything)

and ppl really start to notice

suddenly you start seeing people talk to yukhei more and vice versa

slowly, yukhei begins to let down that weird bad boy aura and just starts being friendly

starting with you

at first, the tall boy teasing you and running up to you in the hallways would always shock you, but after you had gotten used to his presence, it was like he was just another one of the boys

and yukhei would always make fun of you and the day you first officially met, always saying that you’d really “fallen” for him

followed by a chorus of disbelieving and disgusted groans amongst the group of all your friends

even some of your friends who had no want to join jisung’s club would sometimes just come by to hang out with yukhei

it peeved jisung at first, but even he found that he enjoyed talking to yukhei and the rest of you more than sitting around trying to defeat chenle in mortal kombat

you guys had gotten so close that you all had even welcomed yukhei into your group chat

you would often wake in the day to yukhei flooding the gc with memes and other silly musings throughout the day that had all of you always somewhere between blocking him and physically fighting him next time you saw him

you had never known yukhei would be so open and lively, and now that you did it was like you couldn’t see him any other way

jungwoo really wasn’t kidding!!

and it’s one night that you all stayed a little longer than you usually did after classes, and you know you’ve got to walk yourself home in the dark and you’re really not looking forward to it

usually, you’d ask one of the boys to take you home but they’re all busy and have to bail but they tell you to text the group chat when you’ve made it home safely

but that,,, that really doesn’t sit right with yukhei

and since he has nowhere to be, he just grabs your backpack for you and slings it over his shoulder and says that you guys should walk home together

at first, you’re really surprised and kind of don’t know what to say but he just quickly assures you that it’s no biggie and that he’d been meaning to get a little more fresh air in lately. an extra long walk home would be fine for him

so you let him walk you

it’s kind of chilly out so you naturally gravitate closer to yukhei, hoping he wouldn’t think it was too weird

and about five minutes into your walk home yukhei just laughs and wraps an arm around you, tucking you into the warmth of the fur lining inside his leather jacket

you’re surprised by the sudden touch but he doesn’t seem nearly as blushy as you

“you were practically curling into my side. i thought i’d save you the effort” he says

you don’t notice because you’re still so surprised, but even yukhei has turned a pretty shade of pink while you fumbled over your feet as you tried to walk in the new position

the walk home is relatively silent, him not saying much despite your expectation he would

after all, he was always a chatterbox around the boys

but it’s not like you’re uncomfortable with the silence and it’s not like you don’t enjoy it

and so you embrace the silence and let him hold you close while he lets you lead him toward your place

by the time you arrive, your mother is waiting for you and is surprised at your strange partner walking you so you quickly begin to introduce yukhei but he beats you right to it, dropping his arm from your shoulders as he does so

“hello mrs. (l/n), i’m wong yukhei. i go to (y/n)’s school and i’m a friend of theirs. we and a few of our other friends stayed at school a little later than usual so i thought i should walk them home. it’s nice to meet you” yukhei steps up and holds out his hand for a handshake, that of which she takes with a small smile forming on her mouth as she greets him back

“thank you, yukhei. i would have been upset if i found them coming home all alone. in fact, i was just about to come pick them up myself”

yukhei grins, “you won’t have to worry. i’ll be happy to walk them home whenever… that’s… if they allow me…?” yukhei suddenly turns to you, and he’s such an unbelievable sight compared to the yukhei you usually saw

i mean, how many layers did this guy have??

he stands tall and straight, hands folded in front of him and smiling politely at you under his ash blond fringe, batting his eyelashes at you as he awaits your response

unable to think of anything else to say, you just quietly nod at him

he grins wider and then looks back at your mother, “and is it okay with you, ma’am?”

and OFC your mom is like yes!! please handsome young man!!! go right ahead!!!!

“great! i should be heading home now, but it was nice meeting you,” yukhei bows his head at her and then walks back up to you, grinning wickedly as he stands so that your mother can’t see you or his face, “same time and place tomorrow night, then?”

“w-what?” you splutter, not at all affected by his proximity

that was sarcasm

you were definitely malfunctioning with how close he was to you lol

he tilts his head and nudges your shoulder, “when i walk you home tomorrow! it can be our thing”

you blink up at him “but.. isn’t that usually a couple thing?”

he leans imperceptibly close, so much so that while your mother probably can’t sense it, you absolutely can, “it can be if you want it to be… but i’ll let you sleep on it. night, (y/n)”

and then he walks off, inhaling your exhale and your peace of mind in the palm of his hands

and starting that night, the “bad boy” who you’d grown to see change over time had pulled another surprise out of the hat for you

your mother laughs as you rush upstairs and gather your bearings with a quick scream into your pillow and a stupid grin plastered on your face, right before sending a quick message to yukhei and tossing your phone across the room in case you tried to take what you said back in nervousness

yukhei feels a vibration in his pocket as he begins his trek home, ears red as he attempts to catch his own breath because where did he even get the balls to do something like that? was he out of his mind???

he pulls his phone out of his pocket, hands shaking slightly as he fumbles to read the notification on his screen

💕(y/n) 💕: i think i’d like it to be a couple thing

if you thought he had stolen your breath, you should’ve seen him

[sapphirescales]

anyways, ive been thinkin abt my rp exp on raven for ages and how its not always been a positive experience??? and how a lot of ppl talk shit abt me behind my back for Certain Decisions i made w this blog but like lmao dont fucking talk to me like you weren't part of the problem when i joined as xm//fc raven in 2012, the xrpc fuckin HATED HER. there were basically NO GIFSETS, NO META of her ANYWHERE, her entire tag was filled w people who hated and despised the movie version of her bc they either resent jen's Success™ or bc they thought she was Weak and Useless and Childish and Selfish -- EVEN THO xm//fc was an origin story. they preferred xtrilogy raven who had a total of like 4? 5? lines? and no characterisation to her other than blue, naked and subservient to erik. what a fckn surprise. like SORRY TO BE SALTY AF but the rpc pissed me tf off. i had to deal w SO MUCH SEXISM AND MISOGYNY not just from the non rp side of fandom but also from potential rp partners. from charles and erik rpers who either wanted an infantile ravne or a Bitch™ as an antagonist in their ch*rik stories. from random male ocs and canons -- ppl from the mcu and 616 alike -- who were only interested in writing ships or using raven as fodder and support for their chara's emotional Angst™ bc obvs shes female and so she MUST naturally give a shit abt everyone, even ppl she's never met every time i reblogged a vaguely intimate image, or a text post, or talked abt sex hcs or even just discussed her body image, i would get unsolicited invitations for ships and abt how "my muse would **** and ****** and ********* raven, would love it if raven also ** and **** and ***". and it is STILL HAPPENING TODAY, in 2017. i am STILL getting messages like this from ppl i have never rp'd with, never followed, sexually explicit and unasked for. i'd get unfollowed and shamed by Prominent Members of the xrpc (only real 2012-2014 era rpers will know which blogs im talkin abt) as being sex-focused and ship-focused for making raven even the slightest bit sexual. like sry 2 sound like a bitch but i guess i am one?? i had to work fckn HARD to establish raven as a character to be taken seriously in the rpc even tho she was a movie version. she only started getting popular after do//fp, and even now she still gets a lot of shit. i had to work fckn hard to be taken seriously, and protect the investment of my time and energy which means im exclusive and selective and mutuals preferred and even then!!!! i STILL can't reblog or talk abt raven's sexuality, no matter how important it is (esp to me a lgbtqia woman), because the Moment™ i ever made her a sexual person she stopped being taken seriously and it STILL happens. ppl clamour around male muses who talk sex hcs but when female muses do, theyre immediately taken less seriously. you'll immediately get hounded for ships w ppl you've never written with tht suddenly feel like they can harass you bc you stop being intimidating when you show the sexual interests of yr muse so like, while i know Some Of You are out there bitching abt how i dont rp w everyone, tht i make myself deliberately unapproachable, and abt how Toxique™ i am bc im exclusive and mutuals prioritised, remember i fckn tried to get along w you ppl and ya'll did me SO DIRTY repeatedly. fuck you.

[icespyders]

Kenma and Futakuchi for the character thing?

thank you aaaa!!! :’)))))

kenma! (also hey anon who also asked me for kenma, this is for you too!!!

First impression: “oh it’s that one from the rival team my sister likes”

Impression now: hilarious smartass who simultaneously doesn’t suffer fools and yet hangs out with ppl like kuroo and hinata and lev, why does he do this to himself. and while i’m asking questions, how come i’ve written about him so much and so easily lmao

Favorite moment: i LOVE that part in that first nekoma-karasuno practice match where kenma saves the game diving for that last receive; for me it really cemented the notion that, despite his apparent apathy for volleyball, he actually does care and he’ll go the extra mile to support the team in crisis moments.

Idea for a story: every time i regain consciousness i have a new idea for a kuroken story. here’s one that’s literally one opening scene of a college au and nothing else so i haven’t been able to write it properly: stressed liberal arts student kenma is in danger of flunking his chemistry core class and ends up with kuroo tutoring him. kuroo walks in for their first session late, looking stupid hot, and immediately sits down, pins his bangs back with cutesy novelty clips and puts on huge dork glasses, probably makes a lame science pun to break the ice, and cheerfully asks “ok so what are you having trouble with?” kenma, torn between attraction and confusion: “…everything.”

Unpopular opinion - i don’t like when kenma’s portrayed as totally emotionless…he’s definitely not a heart on his sleeve kinda guy but he has to have feelings! i like exploring the contrast between his interior life and external persona, that’s way more interesting to me.

Favorite relationship - me, with 50,000 words of kuroken fics flying out of my pockets, sweating: uh i may have slight bias here. i love childhood friends dynamics, esp kuroken, bc they’re so different but clearly understand and care abt each other so much!!! i like how they balance each other out and nudge each other to be their best. i think i include kuroo and kenma’s habit of going like “do not” “do so” at each other in every fic i write lol

Favorite headcanon - kenma for nekoma captain next year!!! he loves nekoma and he might complain but i think he’d be a good leader, he has everyone’s trust and he’s got the right mind for it. :’)

futakuchi!

First impression - annoying scene kid (have you seen those bangs??? my god. if he wasn’t a volleyball jock he’d be writing poems about The Burden Of The Human Condition in stairwells at dateko)

Impression now - annoying scene kid but i love him for it. futakuchi is so annoying and hilarious, he makes me laugh so much

Favorite moment - favorite funny moment is from that dateko-karasuno practice match after spring high when futakuchi rallies his team by basically going like “alright guys let’s go ahead and fuck with their heads!! go get ‘em!!!” but my favorite serious moment is from the end of the inter high dateko-karasuno match, when futakuchi tries to save that that last play…how you can see his expression changing as he realizes he’s not gonna make it and it’s gonna lose dateko the game, how it demonstrates he’s serious about this deep down inside. like that’s the moment that explains why he’s the captain now, yknow? he’s an annoying shitheel but he’s still giving it his all out there!

Idea for a story - i’ve never written futakuchi before so idk! i gotta fit him into an ensemble fic someday, just to try and get a feel for it. although i haven’t forgotten this little inkling of an idea, it still makes me laugh

Unpopular opinion - i feel like the prevailing feelings abt futakuchi in the fandom are “futakuchi must be stopped” and “never stop futakuchi” and tbh i play both sides of this argument at the same time all the time. he needs to be stopped but also i’ll kill anyone who tries to stop him. shine on, u crazy diamond

Favorite relationship - i don’t see content for this ship a lot but i like aone/futakuchi for the sheer comedy potential of futakuchi talking shit to everyone else in miyagi from behind his intimidating boyfriend’s shoulder lmao

Favorite headcanon - futakuchi is a sap deep down inside and there are certain things in life he won’t mock. like he’d cry at weddings and get a nice gift, whoever invited him is vaguely suspicious of his goodwill but there’s no catch, he just likes weddings ok

[bwicblog]

AA: spoilern alernt, flarnping in the rnain fucking S U C K S.

AA: got mud all the way up to my goddamn flaps.

AA: n, p surne I've got mud I N them, ugh.

ID: clearly you need me to show you how it's done. =:P

AA: lmao, y, mb when yrn off bedrnest, dude. >:}

AA: I'm playing forn bodies, but that doesn't mean I want Y R N S.

ID: psh not wanting my hot bod, i'm crushed. =:'(

ID: tho i get what you mean, the mud is the fucking worst.

AA: lmaoooo. soz, soz. am I supposed to say yrn hella hot now to soothe yrn poorn ego?

ID: obvs. =:P

ID: my ego has been brushed enough at this fair! =>:(

ID: ...bruised.

AA: too late.

ID: =>:I i'm working with one hand here, i demand a break.

AA: it's been brnushed and now you gotta polish it, orn shit'll just look fucking tacky.

AA: lmaoooo.

AA: I offerned you a wornm, dude.

AA: you C Ö U L D be, wtf did prni say AA: 8/10 hot A N D w two frnonds, but n, you gotta go and get squicked on me. >:P

ID: i think i lost enough blood without feeding it to a worm too.

AA: blood comes back, suck it uppp.

AA HAS ATTACHED lolheded.jpeg! It is a troll trying to wrench his leg out of a bog. AA: lmaoooo, evernyone sucks at this sO harnd. AA: wtf you up to?

AA: feeling bettern yet?

ID: i mean. define better. i'm not feeling like i'm about to die.

ID: i'm on my way to pheres' cart for some bandaging and a shirt. and pay.

AA: k, good. >:} AA: make him buy you food too!!

AA: when's the last time you ate??

ID: uhhh.

ID: the pizza night?

AA: soz forn ditching, btw, totes was like.. not thinking abt

AA:

AA: lmfao, what the fuuuuuck.

AA: congrnats, yrn a trnashcan firne, brnah.

AA: y, make him feed you.

ID: at least i'm not a fucking mud monster. =:P

ID: i mean i'm preparing myself for a whole lot of fussing, don't worry. he's already trying to talk me in to getting a room.

AA HAS ATTACHED godkingmudmonstertoyou.jpeg!

ID: did you fucking roll in the mud?

ID: you oinkbeast.

AA: he is a fussy fangs. >:P AA: and y! well, n. Ï HID in the mud and then jumped out.

AA: tactics, mothernfuckern.

ID: okay godking oinkbeast. =:P

SS: (Wtf, Hads, I thought you were food acquisition extraordinaire. (\ene/) You tellin me a temp -3 to CHA courtesy a lookin like you already been culled's enough to stop you??) SS: (Ain't you supposed to, like, work that ish for pity?)

ID: uh actually i think looking like i do makes peeps want to help me more.

AA: y, y, that's the joke, gj.

AA: >:P

ID: i was just feeling like garbage too much to take advantage.

ID: =>:P

ID: let a one-handed guy finish sips.

ID: you're just all too fast for me. =:P

AA: lmaoo. well, I can manage arnd stabbing folks, so I think you oughta manage just fine. >:P

ID: well if you finish up soonish, hit me up around pheres'. probably take him a while to patch me up. especially if i can get him to get the fucking stitches out.

AA: mm, mb, mb!! will drnop by, at least. >:} AA: laaal. you wanna come with??

ID: well now you gotta, or else my pumper will get all crushed. =:P

AA: yrn pushern is so frnagile, omggg. >:}

ID: it's been through a lot okay. =:'(

AA: y, y, will come. AA: you taking a whale back orn staying up herne, btw??

ID: haven't decided yet. still got time. depends how much i've healed too.

ID: rather not be in this huge-ass city all busted up.

AA: y, well, come rnide W me and lal. it'll be fuuuuuun.

AA: and i totes will just keep my phone on voice2text. >:} since he whined abt it so much last time.

ID: got my lusus to worry about remember. =:P

AA: oh, lame. laaaaame. AA: .. I can drnive supern fucking slow. >:P

ID: sorry we can't all have easily portable lusii. =:P maybe! i don't want to slow you and lal down if you both need to be back or whatever.

AA: naaah. mb?? AA: .. eh, if you can't rnide w us, you should totes rnide w prni. trnavelling is, like, waaaaay morne fun w ppl. AA: also, you'll, like, look less like cullbait, js. >:}

ID: fucking rude. =:P

ID: pri is a ways away in the wrong direction i think. idk. we'll see!

SS: (Wait, where am I gettin wigglernapped to?)

SS: (Soz, missed some ish through Sipa's unique and charmin quirk accent. (\ eue/) )

SS: (Aka dropped my palm husk in a hay pile.)

AA: dude, when they say a quick rnoll in the hay, it's not supposed to be lits. js. >:} AA:and we'rne gonna go watch hads get bits rnipped out by phern.

AA: it'll be fuuuuuun.

ID: if he doesn't do it you will, right sips? =:P

ID: stitches don't agree with my fragile lil bod.

SS: (Define 'bits,' omfg - I'm delicate, my constitution can't handle straight up guro ish and the bleatbeast!) SS: (Guro or furry ish, pls limit to one.)

AA: n, dude, half the fun is seeing you go grneen when you find out.

ID: just no barfing on me lal.

AA: bc spoilern alernt, yrn totes going grneen.

SS: (No reverse vore, got it.) (\unu/) )

SA: laledy, I believe in you. You were okay for the fight weren't you?

SS: (And shit, pal, here I thought I was gonna go violet!)

SS: (Give or take a stab wound!)

SS: (Nah, I totes swooned! Didn't you see 'em valiantly carry the greenblood away? That was totes me.)

AA: n, n, that only happens when you stay in the trnap forn morne than fourn hourns, soz.

SA: wasn't Hadean in the bathtub for several hours over four when we first met.

SA: I don't remember.

ID: was that when we first met? i did spend a lot of time in a tub.

SA: swooned... laledy, you should get a costume. Maybe you will have fun with Sipara and the others acting

SS: (N, def me! Like we totes said, I'm going violet!)

ID: no gills. =:'(

SA: it's a scientific fact that non seadwellers are softer to the touch anyways

SA: so it's for the best

SA: no scales

AA: oh my god, y. AA: pls get a costume. frnom phern.

SA: 😄

AA: it'll be grn8. >:}

AA: and eyy, you and hads can M A T C H.

SA: please don't put laledy in a stripper outfit. I think they at least deserve better than that.

SS: (Shit, pal, I'm down to be a booth babe.)

SS: (Y, SA's got it right! Gimme the hooker outfit like I deserve. (\unu/) )

ID: i will forever be the booth babe master, let's be real.

SA: I-- oh, well, if that's what you really want. 😮

AA: hads, my dude, you can't just say that.

AA: you gotta C'O M P E T E.

ID: fite me lal.

AA: lmao. >:} y, exactly.

SA: what if others want to compete

SA: a booth babe tournament

SA: Sipara, go

SS: (I nominate Sipa to be my champion.)

AA: n, no one else is prnetty enough, soz. AA: and fuck off, it'd be totes unfairn forn M E to compete, dude.

SS: (For fightin, not for babe-ness.)

AA: do you see these abs?? shit's unrneal.

SA: I think im pretty enough 😠

ID: i'll beat all of you any night. anyways, pris! pheres is at the greenblood circle now. so go there and not the maroon circle or where ever he was before. i'm gonna get walking. and i want my eyes free to watch anyone who wants to mess with me.

SA: Sipara wins on abs alone

SS: (Shit, wait, can we have Pheres judge? He's, like, got a thing for green, right?)

SA: I will.

AA: soz, prni, you totes ain't. yrn, like, qt.

SS: (Sipa wins on accounta I'm p sure she can, like, pick me up with one frond and I'm p sure I'm too intimidated to fight that ish.)

AA: like a barnkbeast.

SA: but I wanted to be handsome

AA: totes diff genrne.

SA: but will you fight her in a contest of looks laledy

SA: that's the most important part

AA: ... idk abt one frnond, but now we'rne totes gonna have to see. >:}

SA: oh. Now you've done it 🙃

SS: (Omfg.)

SS: (I demand a one-fronded Sipa carriage to tote me around.)

SS: (And, SA, think of it this way: if you're up an competin with someone on, like, any front.)

SS: (And they can up and do that.)

SS: (D'you really wanna challenge 'em?)

SA: perhaps at a safe distance, with a required boundary line.

SS: (Zactly!)

SA: but I also weigh little enough anyone could pick me up. I am sure Sipara could lift you and I together

SS: (You hear that, Sipa??)

AA: boundarny lines arne forn cheaters and cowa

SS: (He's totes sure!!)

AA: !!!!!!!!!!!!!

SS: (Are you gonna let him down??)

AA: now we gotta fucking do it. way2babully, prni, jfc.

SA: what is... babully..

AA: ugghhh

AA: I've got some chucklehead trnying to fucking get back up. brnb, brnb. lal, you explain!!SA: be careful Sipara

SS: (Well, you see.)

SS: (When a troll and her ability to talk proper-like love each other v v much, they hook up!)

SS: (But trolls ain't made for datin abstract concepts, so it inevitably goes real sideways-like, and results in ish like trolls decidin they ain't never gonna have ish to do with talkin proper-like again.)

SS: (And that's why Sipara doesn't know how to talk right.)SA: but... what does babully mean

SA: I understand Sipara may have a strange quirk and not speak with perfect grammar or syntax

SA: so is your relationship with the abstract concept of language doing alright?AA: is that also why i'm gonna say you should go pail yrn lusus?? yrn the wornst, omfg. and stfu, prni, you know my quirnk is  G RN8. >:P

SA: :thinking:

SA: :laughing:

AA: it's a bb bully, duuuh.

SA: oh

SA: I'm a good person, I'm not a bully

SA: :lying_face:

AA: that's a box 2 me, brnah, dd.

SA: oh...

SA: I tried

AA: omggg, don't go all glum.

AA: yrn so a bully. bc you darned me and ppl gotta take darnes.  >:}

SA: it was an emoji that was saying j was lying

SA: you could also say no and tell me to hush

SA: another option

AA: LMAO WHAT

AA: omfg, yrn trneachernous. >:'{

SA: :hugging:

SA: now let me hug you with my traitorous hands

SA: I promise nothing bad will happen

SA: this is a joke

SS: (That's, like, the least ominous ish I've heard tonigh twixt the bleatbeast ish and the stitch-pulling, negl.)

AA: oh my god, yrn nevern getting a hug again, jsyk.

SA: I will ask Hadean for one

SA: :cry:

SA: since you won't share hugs

SS: (Sipa, quick, go hide Hads. (\qnq/) )

SA: does that mean I win, laledy?

SS: (Depends, pal, if you win does that mean you ain't gonna go all Bewear on me??)

SS: (Cos I ain't a man of pride, pal, I'm down to forfeit for, like, my life. (\unu/) )

SA: oh I wouldn't do that anyways.

SA: :smiley:

SA: you are all safe with me

SS: (I totes believe you. (\qnq/) )

SA: I'm glad

SA: I must rest now. I will see you later laledy

SS: (See ya laters! (\eue/) )