#also i feel like i pretty much just ripped off all of Ever After (1998)

[majasleeps]

Ice Breaker

(first fanfic on here so idk how to format it but it'll be fine. also i'll be mainly making shit up so if anyone plays hockey... my apologies in advance lol)

Tim Lafleur x gn!reader

summary: you're a hockey player and a damn good one at that. You've loved being on the ice as long as you can remember and ever since discovering hockey it's been difficult to get you off the ice! You play in a local team for a college in Virginia and one day you encounter a particular boy on an opposing team.

1991

It's a few weeks before the high school tournaments start and your hockey team is in the rink practicing.

"FUCK!" the person you just slammed into the edge of the rink lets out a series of curses. You hear a whistle from your coach and you roll your eyes already knowing the reason. Yet he still yells it out for everyone to hear, "L/N! Excessive violence! Last warning or you're getting pulled."

You groan to yourself but nod at him in acknowledgement anyway and skate back to your post. Of course you help the person you technically assaulted since he was your teammate after all.

Yup, this was just practice but why shouldn't you give it your all here too? At least that's your reasoning. Especially seeing how you'll be up against actual other teams in just a few weeks. You had to be ready!

Well anyway you go on to train more, get a few warnings here and there, actually get put on the bench after causing one of your team player's nose to bleed. And the weeks pass by like it was nothing.

You're in the rink, getting ready in your position as you stare down some of the members of the opposing team, 'the enemies', as you dubbed them in your head.

And even though all of the players are 15 year olds, one stands out to you, mainly because he's quite a bit taller than the other kids, even compared to your team. But no time to think on that as the start signal is given. Everyone shoots in action and you're thriving in the competition. One person gets tackled, then another, someone shoots and misses and the other scores. It feels exhilarating especially looking at the board and seeing you're one point ahead.

Time's almost up and that tall kid from before seems to think he's gonna get a final puck in before the timer goes off. Well not on your watch. As he skates closer, evading the offensive lines on your team, he's getting ready to shoot. But just before he gets the chance you slam him to the ground with your own body, and a whistle and airhorn signal that 1) you got a warning (what a surprise) but 2) time's up. And your team won.

You celebrate inwardly for a quick second before getting up and stretching out your hand to the boy you tackled out of good sportsmanship. Although he doesn't seem to appreciate it, he smacks your hand away, gets up while ripping of his helmet, "What is your problem?!" he semi-yells.

You take off your own helmet so he can see your disgruntled expression. You shrug and say "Losing, losing is my problem so I won't lose."

He scoffs and skates away and you do the same to go celebrate with your team.

And even though this first impression was pretty sour, you can't tell if it bettered or not throughout the years. Neither of you ever knew each other that well, always different schools, always different districts yet somehow you two would always end up facing each other on the ice.

Years went by and you actually started to enjoy this rivalry between the two of you. Sometimes you won and he'd be pouty but sometimes you lost and he couldn't stop smirking. In the beginning that for sure bothered you but as this went on you didn't mind losing to him anymore. As you grew older of course you started learning things about him as well, like that his name is Tim Lafleur and a weird kid in general, at least according to every teammate he's ever had.

1998

Now he is in a university and you're in college and with busy life styles it doesn't leave much room for socializing. But you could always count on the ice to bring the two of you together. Over the years most of the original teams miraculously stayed pretty much the same. Here and there someone left and someone else took their place but amongst both your teams it had become a sort of unspoken rule that in the rink, no one gets to tackle you except Tim, and no one tackled Tim but you.

You're in the game playing against Tim's team and it's going great. The score is 2-2 and you're thrilled whenever you get closer to the goal because Tim would of course try to prevent you from getting even closer. And if you didn't know better, you'd think he was enjoying himself as much as you were.

Another goal scored by your team so you're now in the lead. Tim has the puck and is getting awfully close to a good position to score a goal. So you head straight for him, however you suppose the new fella in your team didn't get the memo about that unspoken rule. Because as you're almost there, the new guy slams Tim into the wall and a nauseating crack can be heard. Now usually when it's you, sure you're rough but Tim had always been smiling and gotten up within a few seconds.

But now... he lay there, silently groaning and not making a move to get up. A shock had not just overcome you but both teams and the entire crowd, everyone was silent. You were the first to snap out of it and rush to Tim.

"Jesus fuck! Are you alright Tim? Are you hurt?" you question him as you get down on your teams and turn him on his back. When you do he lets out a sharp gasp and you see that something is definitely wrong with his wrist...it's bend, and not in the right direction.

You turn to your teammate and yell out at him, "What is wrong with you?! You broke his fucking wrist, dickbag!!"

Another groan from Tim and your head immediately flies to him, speaking softly and reassuring him he'll be fine. By this time the coach has already come up to you two and informed the stand-by medics. People shot in action and in seemingly no time, Tim got carried away, and you were left to stand alone on the cracked ice.

After everything has calmed down, you go up to your coach.

"Hey coach? Is Tim gonna be alright?" He looks at you and lets out a slow breath.

"He'll be fine, Y/N. Going to take a while to recover from a broken wrist and some fractured fingers though so I doubt he'll be on the ice much"

You mull over his words for a bit before gathering up the courage to ask, "Is there any way I can visit him?" The tone in your voice almost makes you sound sheepish, as if this is taboo to ask, he IS your 'rival' after all.

He gives you a faint smile, "I'll talk to their coach to see if we can arrange anything yeah?" You smile back at that answer and nod your head.

Thanks to the coaches you're able to visit him at his apartment a few days later, though you're a bit self-conscious about it. Showing up at his apartment without him ever having told you the address might seem a bit weird.

But your worries melt away when you knock on the door and that white haired boy with all the piercings opens up. And when he notices it's you, he's smiling.

"Hey Y/N! Didn't expect you to visit me of all people", he laughs a bit.

You roll your eyes but nonetheless smile up at him, somehow he's gotten even taller over the years.

"How's the wrist doing? Heard it was a nasty surgery?" you asked him.

"Oh yeah blood and flesh everywhere" he's making exaggerated hand motions with his good hand causing you both to giggle. "Umm, anyway you wanna come in?" he offers looking at you expectantly.

"Yeah sure!" you didn't mean your face to light up when you accepted and you hope he didn't notice. He thinks it's cute you're happy to be around him.

He leads you to his bedroom, quickly introducing you to his roommate Darryl. He flops on the bed and hisses out as the motion was a tad too violent for his arm.

You hurry next to him on his bed, trying to make sure he's okay. "You good there?" you ask as you take his arm carefully.

He grimaces a bit at first but it soon turns into a playful smirk. "No it hurts so much Y/N!" he exclaims dramatically, "I think the only thing that could heal my wounds is a kiss" He looks at you as he says that, his smile never fading but now there's a slight anxiety in his eyes. You don't notice that and just roll your eyes. You decide to play along, "okay there big guy, but I don't think my kisses are magical enough to heal broken bones", and you kiss the cast around his wrist.

"There, feel better?" you laugh along with him. He seems to get a glint of confidence in his eye as he bites his lip hard around to draw a bit of blood.

"You think you could kiss this wound too?" as he point at his lower lip.

You're speechless for a moment and it's enough for him to backtrack. He starts rambling that you don't have to and it was a dumb idea, etc. Before he can go on, you lean in and give him a peck on the small puncture wound in his lip.

Now it's his turn to be stunned as you sit there equally flustered. A moment of silence before the two you start smiling like idiots in love, which frankly, you were.

"I think I need a bit more of those magic lips, love." He says and you silently agree as you lean in again, this time slower, for a proper kiss. Like two ice skaters in the rink, your lips graciously glide together to form an amazing symphony of fireworks in your head and heart. The both of you are still smiling in the kiss and you can still taste the bit of blood but neither of you mind it.

You're probably softly kissing each other for a few minutes before finally breaking away and taking the chance to get a proper breath.

You grin at him and say "I guess I'll be seeing you off the ice more often then right?"

He grins back "Oh absolutely"

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

The things I wanted to see in CARS...

I'm one of the few weirdos out there who actually digs, no... Not just digs, **loves** CARS.

Time to turn in my "animation fan" card, huh?

Yes that's right, the 2006 Pixar film that was largely conceived and mapped out by the incredibly talented Jorgen Klubien, but highjacked by a very overzealous John Lasseter, who pretty much wrote Jorgen's contributions to the movie out of the official production history. Anyways- Yeah, whoever actually made that movie, I love it.

And it's honestly very refreshing to see a generation who grew up watching that movie regarding it as "top tier Pixar" or "cinema". I was there from the start, I knew back then that it was pretty cool. CARS came out when I was 13 years old, and that young animation enthusiast back then loved it every bit as much as previous Pixar darlings like the TOY STORY movies, FINDING NEMO, and THE INCREDIBLES... While everyone else around them jeered that it was their first misstep, or it just was not as good as their previous movies. That it was just a DOC HOLLYWOOD rip-off. (A movie that no one would've ever thought of, until Pixar made something... See also, HERMAN'S HEAD being dredged up from the past when INSIDE OUT was being released.) Even THE SIMPSONS made a joke about CARS being regarded as a Pixar black sheep. Oh, and the endless discussion, "How does that world work??? It makes no sense???" (Please don't show these people 1940s and 1950s talking vehicle cartoons, lol.)

The previous whipping post/designated "weak link" was A BUG'S LIFE. No surprise, a relatively "simpler" fable that wasn't interested in reinventing the wheel... (And that too has been reclaimed, particularly for its not-so-subtle parallels.) Interestingly, CARS was conceived in the mid-1990s, and in another timeline it would've been the third Pixar movie *after* A BUG'S LIFE. I feel both movies had a lot in common, so this linking just confirms that for me.

Anyways, yeah... I knew it all along, but it's cool to see younger folk have held onto it since seeing it as kids and hold it up in high regard. The kids are alright, they know don't they? Just like they did with animated financial flops of the 2000s such as THE EMPEROR'S NEW GROOVE, and critical duds like ATLANTIS: THE LOST EMPIRE. But that's what happens when adults go into an animated feature expecting something that specifically caters to their tastes, eh?

So, yeah, CARS of course spawned a massive franchise - and remained a thorn in the side of AH-dult animation fans and anal-retentive types who insist that Pixar only put out one specific kind of movie. CARS' success in 2006 lead to two theatrical sequels, two spin-offs produced by Disney's defunct animation studio Disneytoon (who handled direct-to-video movies and such), a ton of short films, and even a Disney+ series that came out last year.

However, I find it rather unusual that two of my favorite things pertaining to automobiles were *never* in these movies...

A) One of my all-time favorite cars...

Dodge Vipers.

The Viper was in production from 1991 to 2010, a short hiatus occurred, then it returned in 2013... But then the Viper ceased to be in 2017. It's seemingly a relic now, a car contained to the 1990s... But I'll always love the Viper, no two ways about that. Video games I had and played religiously starting in 1998 had a Dodge Viper option, and I fell in love with that car right off the bat.

And yet, not a single CARS movie, show, short, etc.... Had a Dodge Viper in it... Why you do me dirty like that, Pixar? I know that the series could only have so many kinds of real-life licensed vehicles in it, but the Viper was still a thing when the first movie came out and when the second movie was in production... And the third movie, for that matter...

Why no Vipers?

Ah well, Lightning McQueen kind of looks like a late '90s/early '00s Dodge Viper GTS Coupe anyways. The curvy front, the back spoiler, I kinda think so. No?

So yeah... No Vipers... I'm sure Pixar will continue this franchise in some way or another. CARS ON THE ROAD debuted in September 2022, which was five years after the release of CARS 3... The only new CARS stuff that came out in those five years were... Shorts, I think? There was at least one PIXAR POPCORN short dedicated to it. And it's very possible that show gets a second season, even if one of the people instrumental in it and other CARS media - Steve Purcell - got let go from Pixar.

Thing is, CARS 3 didn't really do all that good. Lowest grossing mainline movie in the series, and one of Pixar's lowest grossing in the pre-COVID years at that. $383m isn't terrible by any means, but against a $175m production budget... And when you compare that to what CARS 1 made in 2006 *without* the aid of 3D or IMAX or any premium formats... 11 years earlier, when tickets cost less... Yeah, I think that film kind of was the end? Disneytoon would've made more vehicle movies, such as a spacecraft movie that was set for 2019 and a movie about subway trains, but Disneytoon was shut down after Lasseter was ousted from every position of his at The Walt Disney Company. It's as if he kept DT on life support in the post-Eisner era.

But then again, it's still apparently an easy moneymaker for Disney, so a fourth movie could happen. Or another Disney+ series. After all, Cars Land is a thing among other various parks stuff.

I dunno, I just wanna Viper in a CARS movie or show!

And, also, I'm a weirdo. I'll gladly take another few of those movies, especially if they pay for more originals at Pixar.

So, what else did these movies not have?

B) Beach Boys songs about cars... And other classic cars songs, at that!

Okay, so I am a massive fan of The Beach Boys... And in their early years, roughly 1961-mid 1964, they did a lot of songs about cars amidst the burgeoning "hot rod rock" scene. Classics such as '409', 'Shut Down', 'Little Deuce Coupe'...

... heck a whole LITTLE DEUCE COUPE album filled to the brim with car songs, in addition to songs like 'Don't Worry Baby', 'Little Honda', etc. etc. etc.

Anyways, I can literally smell the motor oil when I hear these songs. Once leader Brian Wilson started producing the group, he really brought a level of immersion to these songs via the harmonies and arrangement of the instruments. Like, these songs define "car song".

Outside of The Beach Boys, you have songs such as fellow surf group Jan & Dean's car tunes. Here's a banger one, 'My Mighty G.T.O.':

About half of the soundtrack of CARS 1 was vintage stuff, but not really car stuff. I mean, you did have 'Route 66' by Chuck Berry, a road song for sure, but a song like the two above. That being, I always loved the needledrop choices in that one: 'Sh-Boom', 'My Heart Would Know', the cover of 'Life Is a Highway', etc. In addition to the songs recorded specifically for it.

Because CARS 2 largely sidelined its racing stuff for a spy plot, there wasn't much car song stuff to go around. And weirdly enough, that movie has a cover of 'You Might Think' by The Cars... You would think (hah) that they'd use the original version by **The Cars**? What is with these movies?

CARS 3 thankfully circled back to this kind of musical backdrop, but it was just a few covers of road songs and some new stuff, like Dan Auerbach's 'Run That Race'. Good stuff, but... No '60s hot rod songs!

Heck, if they ever made a fourth film or another series... I'd be down with it being set in the '60s. I'd legit love for it to be a straight up 1960s racing movie, as that was a prevalent subgenre back in the day. Something like those film reels of Doc Hudson's races that we saw in CARS 3, but as a whole series or film. Complete with the grain and worn out film texture. Hire me Pixar, I'll pitch you that and direct it, and I'll stuff it with all those '50s and '60s car song needledrops!

...

This piece was largely written in jest. Who am I to tell an animation studio what to do? Lol.

[heavens-light-and-hells-ice]

Cendrillon

Once upon a time, on a beautiful estate not far from the city, there lived a man and his daughter. They lived without want and with love for each other, and they were very nearly happy. But the man, a widower, wished to be married again, and he took for his second wife a widow of noble blood but little money, bringing her and her two small girls to live with every comfort on his estate. He promised his two stepdaughters generous dowries and honored all three girls equally as his dear children -- and he prayed his new wife would love them the same way. 

They all lived happily for a time. But fate proved unkind -- a stroke of illness took the man suddenly to the grave. He died intestate, and his wife was given the care of the estate until the girls came of age. At first, the family wept together and comforted each other -- but by the time to shed the mourning-clothes came, things began to change. 

The widow spoiled and coddled her two youngest daughters, but as time passed she treated her stepdaughter with more and more contempt. The little girl was made to scrub and clean while her sisters were forbidden from work, lest their beautiful hands and faces be dirtied. She mucked the stables and carried heavy pails in the sun while her sisters were confined indoors to protect their complexions. By and by her stepmother even made her bedroom into a parlor for her sisters and made her sleep in the kitchens. When she curled up by the fireplace to stay warm, her hair and face became so dirty with soot that her sisters, too young to understand that their jesting hurt, laughed and began to call her Cendrillon. 

And so she grew up drab and weary, cut down by her stepmother's cruel words, while her sisters grew up pretty ladies -- but Cendrillon was never quarrelsome, as she had a kind heart, and her father had told her to love Halone and her stepmother, and she had ever been taught that to do so meant to keep silent and obey. And though her days were hard, she still had cause to smile now and then, as her gentle nature gave her friends among the servants and in the farm's old chocobo, with whom she spent every free bell that she was not instead in her father's library.

Around the time of Cendrillon's sixteenth nameday, an old friend of her father, curious as to the welfare of his late friend's family but confined to his home in the city by his poor health, bid his eldest son pay a visit to their estate. The young man, in training at the Tribunal, did so as soon as he was able to step away from his studies, arriving unexpectedly at the country house's door. He was greeted by the mistress and two pretty young ladies in colorful silks -- and one shy girl whose appearance shocked him.

When he asked, her stepmother shook her head and said, "'Tis a pity that Cendrillon has grown up so coarse and ugly while my daughters have been blessed with beauty, but alas! it must be the will of Halone." 

The young man mumbled and nodded but was immediately suspicious, for while the younger girls' faces were indeed fairer than Cendrillon's, so were their clothes and shoes. After dinner, he slyly excused himself and snuck into the kitchen, where he found Cendrillon laboring to scrub the pots and pans. 

"Why are you toiling here alone while your sisters don't raise a finger to help?" he asked. 

"Their constitutions are delicate," she answered, "and Mother does not want them to break their long nails." 

"She dresses your sisters finely and gives you only rags," he observed. 

"Fine clothes would get dirty while I worked," she said. 

"And you work without even a kitchen maid to help you!" he exclaimed. "Your family is not poor; your stepmother buys finery for your sisters yet makes you alone toil in dust and dirt. 'Tis cruel and unfair, and I am sure your father would be furious to see it." 

"Father told me to love Mother and support her however I can," she answered, sharp. "By working hard, I make her and my sisters happy." 

The young man understood that he had overstepped, and he apologized. But still he added, "Your happiness matters and is just as important as theirs. You are a good and dutiful daughter, but a parent has duties as well, and while Halone teaches us to be obedient, She also teaches us to despise injustice. You should not have to suffer as you do." 

Hearing it from the lips of another, even kind and patient Cendrillon had to agree. But what could she do? She was but sixteen, and the estate and all her father's wealth were in her stepmother's hands. And she was a woman, and in those days it was not easy for a woman to simply leave home and find work. 

"Have you no uncle or aunt, no godparent to help you?” he asked. 

“They have all gone to Heaven,” said Cendrillon. “But for my mother and sisters, I am all alone.” 

"You are not alone. I will see that you receive Halone’s justice,” he said, standing tall -- and though that was but a few ilms taller than Cendrillon, she was moved by this young man's respect and earnest kindness, and she thanked him sincerely. He returned to the city the next day, and as soon as he left, her stepmother redoubled her cruelties towards Cendrillon -- but now she endured it with her chin held a little higher. 

After a few moons, the young man returned, having buried his nose in every book of law he thought might be relevant to Cendrillon's case; that evening, he pulled her into a private corner and explained in whispers what he thought. First, though her stepmother's marriage settlement entitled her to a jointure, she was guardian of the estate only till her husband's heirs came of age and had a solemn duty to preserve it for those heirs' future use; second, the profits of the estate ought to be invested solely towards the maintenance and education of the heirs; and thirdly -- and most astonishingly to Cendrillon -- it was even possible that she, as eldest and only blood daughter of the late master, might be, under the strictest interpretation of the law at the time, her father's sole legal heir, for no papers of her sisters' adoption could be found in the archives. 

"I cannot think that right," said she on hearing this; "Father cherished us equally, and surely he would wish for us to each inherit an equal share." 

"Mayhap so, and he was a good man for it," argued her young advocate, "but your stepmother has not honored his wishes. They say in the city that she spends mountains of coin on silks and slippers to wear to fashionable balls; she spoils herself and her daughters while you are trapped here in the kitchen in naught but rags. I beg you, miss -- allow me to argue your case afore the Tribunal; the adjudicator might be persuaded to assign your family a better guardian, or mayhap declare you fit to take control of the estate immediately." 

Cendrillon was uncertain. "Is it godly to scheme against one's own mother in such a way?" 

The young man was not uncertain at all. "Is it godly to stand by and allow injustice? Would the Fury look upon your state and think it right? A child has a duty to his parents, yes, but a parent's duty to his child is far graver, and a parent's failure of that duty is a far greater crime. As long as your stepmother abuses her position, you are justified protecting yourself by whatever means you may." 

Kind-hearted Cendrillon was still troubled. Even if her sisters sometimes aped their mother's cruelty towards her, they were still young, and she easily forgave them; such little slights were not enough to wish them out of their inheritance. But in the end, she agreed, and the young man returned to the city to make arrangements on her behalf. 

Over the next few moons he visited several times, informing her of his progress. The procedures were labyrinthine, and in those days it was particularly hard to persuade the adjudicators to attend to the affairs of the lowborn and minor houses. But by and by he secured a date for Cendrillon's case to be heard, and early that sun he arrived at the house to include her in his final review. She was to remain at home while he argued her case, as back then it was considered unseemly for women of her father's class to appear before the Tribunal. 

He arrived at the front door and was met by the lady of the house. After paying the proper respects, he asked, "Is your eldest daughter within?" 

"She is tending the vines in the garden," said the stepmother, though it was a lie. From the very beginning, she had hid herself behind the door and listened to everything said between Cendrillon and the young man, and so she knew what they planned for this day. That morning she had tipped a basket of lentils into the ashes of the fireplace and ordered Cendrillon to pick each of them out, a task that would keep her busy for bells. "But tell me -- your father is a merchant of wines, is he not? Did he teach you any of his trade?" 

"Only a little before I went to the Scholasticate, but I know a few things," he answered. 

"Pray, till Cendrillon's returned, come down to the cellar, that I might show you a few bottles and ask you their worth," the stepmother insisted, and though the young man did not wish to long delay, he was persuaded that a short trip would do no harm. 

In the cellar there proved more than a few impressive bottles; the late master of the house had much enjoyed collecting them, having learned to appreciate good vintages from his friend, the young man's father. Likewise had the young man, though a serious student, learned to love good wine, and as he browsed the estate's collection he became so occupied that he did not notice that the lady had quietly walked out until she slammed the door shut and locked him within. "You are a foul meddler," she exclaimed, "but I shan't allow your mischief to succeed and ruin my family." 

"I only wish to help Cendrillon, whom you have treated evilly," shouted the young man from behind the door. "And you cannot expect the Tribunal to excuse my false imprisonment!" 

"Even the Tribunal will easily forget a mere clerk and lowborn," sneered the lady. "As for Cendrillon, she is only mine husband's daughter, while I have two blood daughters of mine own. Mayhap you think me a wicked stepmother, but -- how are my girls to marry well and live happy lives with naught left them by either father or stepfather? No nobleman will look twice at a girl without a dowry, and when I die, my jointure shall return to the estate and my daughters will starve. I must leave you now, upstart boy, for there's a ball tonight in the city -- my daughters must attend in their southron silks and attract highborn notice. If you've broken no bottles by next morn I shall consider releasing you." 

The lady left, taking the key with her and hitching every good chocobo to her carriage, including that of the hapless young man. By the time Cendrillon finished picking all the lentils from the ash, they had long departed. 

The wine-cellar was so deep within the walls of the house that Cendrillon could not hear the young man's cries for help. The butler, however, discovered him -- and, though he knew that his mistress would be like to punish him later, he was very fond of Cendrillon, who was gentle and kind and always treated the glassware with care; he chose therefore to lead Cendrillon to the wine-cellar door, though he could not unlock it without the key. 

Having heard from the young man all that had happened and all that was said, Cendrillon was stricken. "I now understand," she said, "why Mother has coddled my two sisters alone, dressed them prettily and protected their complexions: if she does not soon catch them husbands, they shall be poor and bereft. I thought myself unfortunate -- how unfortunate are they! If they were orphaned again, mayhap they'd end up without even ashes to sleep in."

The young man was astonished. "You are truly good, Cendrillon, to think of them in this situation -- but their misfortune still does not excuse your stepmother's abuses. We cannot miss this evening's hearing; it could be more than a twelvemoon till I could arrange another, and by then mayhap your stepmother will concoct some lie that will defeat us!" 

They tried and tried to open the door, but none of their tricks succeeded. They were at the point of despair when the young man cried, "There is no alternative! Cendrillon must go in my stead to argue her own case." She was aghast, but he continued: "There will be no disputation; you need only lay the evidence before the adjudicator, and I will tell you everything you need to say." 

"But I am a woman," cried Cendrillon. "No woman has ever argued alone before the Tribunal!" 

In answer, the young man removed his robes and passed them through the narrow crack under the wine-cellar door. This gave him, Cendrillon, and the butler all great embarrassment, but at last Cendrillon was persuaded to don them and tie up her hair in a masculine style. Through the door they reviewed all the details of her case, and with trembling she left to ride up to the city, though the only bird left was the farm's work chocobo, now truly ancient. 

As she saddled him, Cendrillon thought with dread, "This poor bird cannot take me to the city in time for mine appointment and back before my stepmother's return." But she thought of the young man's argument that Halone commanded injustice be fought, and so she fervently prayed -- and mayhap She heard, or mayhap that old chocobo she had so many years tended felt his heart swell with tenderness and pride, for he flapped his yellow wings and rose, somehow, into the air, and carried the astonished Cendrillon up into the sky, up above the winding carriage roads, through Daniffen's Collar and the walkways of the Pillars to the great metal doors of the Sacred Tribunal, just in time. 

Her inheritance case did not attract a great crowd of onlookers, but still her knees shook with fear as she stepped before the adjudicator. But after the young man, the butler, and the dear old chocobo had all worked so hard to bring her here, she could not allow herself to fail -- so she breathed in deep and spoke as she had been coached, keeping her voice as calm as she could. The arguments and paperwork were all in order, and there was all that was necessary to incline the adjudicator to listen -- and though he asked her several questions for which she'd not rehearsed, her mind was quick and learned enough for her to stammer out intelligent answers. In the end the adjudicator was satisfied, though he informed her that it would be a few suns before he issued his verdict -- and also a clerk of the Tribunal had really ought to wash his face and hair regularly, if he hoped for advancement. 

As the bells of the great cathedral tolled midnight, Cendrillon soared over the city, riding her bird home as fast as she could. She arrived just in time to run down to the wine-cellar door, pass the young man's robe back to him, and flee up to the kitchen before her stepmother and sisters returned from the ball; the lady, finding all in order and told naught by the servants, decided to free the young man at dawn. She woke the exhausted Cendrillon to gloat, "I learned of your little scheme against me, but no matter; your friend missed his appointment. Do you see now what happens when you defy your betters?" 

Cendrillon replied that she would not see for certain for a few suns yet. 

Within a sennight, there was an unexpected visitor at the door. It was the adjudicator, who had traveled down from the city unannounced to see the situation for himself. 

"Do you have living here a daughter known as Cendrillon," he asked, "and, pray, mind -- lying to one invested with the power of the Tribunal is an extremely serious offense." The lady of the house understood that and, though she did not wish to do so, revealed to him the girl in the kitchens dressed in rags and covered in soot. 

The sight of her face greatly astonished him, and Cendrillon blushed and turned her eyes down. She was very fearful, for she too was guilty of a sort of deception, and so she waited for her punishment. But instead, the adjudicator laughed, and he remarked, "I am glad, after all, that you did not wash." 

He presented her with a sheaf of documents explaining his commands. By strict interpretation of the law, he found Cendrillon to be her father's sole heir and to have a duty to support her father's widow till the latter's death, at which time the jointure would revert to the estate. "And," he concluded with a small smile, "as the young woman is exceptionally eloquent and learned, there is no reason to say that she is too immature to take control of her own affairs and rule as mistress of her estate directly." 

For this very ruling, Cendrillon and her friend had worked and hoped long and hard, and she could not help but feel elated and relieved. Yet as she turned to her stepmother, who had abused and tormented her for many long years, and upon whom she had now extracted just vengeance, she did not so much feel fury satisfied; now that her fear was gone and power lay in her hands, what she chiefly felt was pity. In her thoughts were not only the unkindnesses she had endured for many years but the unkindnesses her stepmother must also have endured, after her first husband died and his house provided naught for his widow and girl-children; she thought not only of how, as a woman, she had been unable to escape and make her own fortune but of how the same was true of her stepmother and sisters, and she thought of how her stepmother chose the path she took because she thought it the only one left open by a society even more cruel and unfair. 

She turned to the adjudicator and her mother and said: "It was my father's wish to provide for my mother and my sisters, and my wish is the same. You may live in the big house, Mother, as long as you wish, and the same for my sisters, who will have dowries sufficient to marry well, if they so like. When Father lived we were a family joined in happiness; 'twas not lack of blood relation but his death that made us turn frightened and distrustful. We have been needlessly unhappy, and if the power to choose again is in mine hands, I choose to create peace and trust again." 

And she held her mother's hands in her own, and then she left for the city in the adjudicator's carraige, to sign and register all the documents necessary to secure her independence, her sisters' fortunes, and her family's happiness. Whether from there she returned to the estate to manage the farm and sit with her sisters as an equal or if she stayed in the city to become a great orator at the Tribunal, mayhap to meet that young man again -- no one can quite say which story is true. But you can be assured that she succeeded, that the adjudicator began to change what the city and Tribunal thought of women who speak firmly and leave the home, that the old chocobo grew fat in the green pastures and never needed to fly again, and, indeed, that they all lived happily ever after. 

[thedistantdusk]

Peace

Also on AO3. For @isidar-mithrim. Thanks to @floreatcastellumposts, my beta/life coach, for catching the gaps I always miss! 

N S F W

They haven’t had another chance to do this since that time. The First Time. Which is rubbish. 

Because as it turns out, rebuilding an entire society is loads of work. And as it turns out, Harry’s expected to help. The past week has been a blur of trials and sentencing, of long meetings and paperwork, of hurrying up for more waiting. He’s had to make decisions. Hard decisions. Decisions he’s nowhere near qualified to make, decisions he wishes literally anyone else could make instead, because for fuck’s sake, he feels middle-aged but he’s only 17, and—

Knock knock knock.

Oh. 

So that’s how long he’s been sitting there. 

Eleven minutes. 

Eleven minutes of thinking about all that — his head in his hands, his knee jiggling impatiently, his mind filled with what he could’ve said, should’ve said. Because eleven minutes is exactly how long they’ve agreed to wait between Ron leaving and Ginny showing up. (Privately, Harry and Ginny both feel the whole room-switching charade is a colossal waste of time. Molly and Arthur almost certainly know they’re doing it, which defeats the purpose. But it makes Hermione feel better about shagging Ron under Molly’s roof, so Harry and Ginny participate. Albeit snidely). 

Regardless, though, he barely has time to issue a muffled “hello” before she’s tumbling into his arms and pressing her body against his and filling his nose with the flowers from her hair and—

“I — want — to — try — something,” Ginny manages, peppering his neck with kisses.

“Erm… y-yeah?” Harry stammers, not sure if he should be more turned on or confused. He doesn’t care when Ginny doesn’t explain herself, though. Who needs answers, really? They’re secondary to the way she’s brushing her shorts against the erection that wasn’t there five seconds ago. 

Harry just moans and grips her more tightly as they stumble back towards his bed. She gives a little nip at his jaw and her tongue darts out to caress his lips, aaaand bollocks, his glasses have fogged. Harry lets out a frustrated sigh, but doesn’t pull away from the snog-slash-walk, even though he’s doing both a bit blindly. It’s a painful reminder that they haven’t sorted out the balance yet, haven’t quite found a rhythm. At Hogwarts she used to take his glasses off during this (before they remembered there was a charm), but shagging when you don’t have 20/20 vision presents challenges. Especially when you’d quite like to see what’s happening. 

Still, Harry doesn’t dare object… not when she’s making that lovely high-pitched purr. Not when he can feel her nipples through her shirt. Not when her arse is in his palms. Not when she’s sliding her tight little body against him, the friction shooting straight to his cock as she moans and rolls her hips.  

He’s so distracted he hardly notices they’ve reached her goal. 

“Bed,” she declares with a hard shove. 

Harry lets out a startled groan as the backs of his knees hit the mattress. She’s still on him, attached to his front; her weight’s distributed across his knees and crotch, which isn’t the most comfortable position. He grabs her arse to shift them back, and without conscious thought, his body takes control. He automatically rolls her beneath him as he’s done a thousand times, and with that, they’re snogging — properly snogging, with lips and tongues and real touching, just like he’s wanted to all week. She moans into his mouth as his hand creeps beneath her baggy t-shirt, and then he darts down to her neck to nibble and bite. 

She loves it when he does this. She’s told him as much, over and over, which is why he loves snogging her like this. Do you still call it snogging when you’re in a bed and you’re about to start shagging? Harry doesn’t know, but his ability to reason either way is diminishing by the second. He begins drifting down her chest, and now she’s doing that thing where she arches her back and rubs her thighs together. All he fucking wants is to stick his head between them as she screams his name and rips at his hair and—

“Wait,” Ginny pants, pushing on his chest. “Wait, Harry.” 

Shit. 

Harry freezes, his hand still cupping her left breast. 

The gravity of the request isn’t lost on him. 

She’s literally never stopped him before. Ever. The closest they’ve even come to facing this… dilemma… was soon after they’d started dating during those glorious weeks at Hogwarts. Things had gotten so hot, so quickly that Harry was legitimately worried he was taking advantage. So one day during a particularly intense snog, he’d employed his last shards of brain power to rip himself away and slur, “Please promise you’ll stop me, Ginny.” 

Ginny’d just blinked back at him in a few panting, desperate second before she’d gripped his hand and shoved it against her chest. Then, in a shaking voice, she’d firmly reminded him that she wasn’t the sort of girl who fancied ambiguity. Or permission. Which was, of course, why he fancied her.  

But now things are a bit different, aren’t they? 

Harry draws a deep breath and rips himself from the memory, growing more mortified by the second. Ginny’s breathless, which is normally a good sign — but she’s also biting her lip, even as a flush crawls further up her chest. Her eyes are filled with something tentative, something uncertain. 

Harry stammers an apology and pulls back as fast as he can. He doesn’t know why she’s asked him to stop, but that hardly matters; his head spins with where he’s gone wrong, with all the shit he’s had to do this week, with all the problems weighing on his heart, and he’s so certain that—

“Harry,” Ginny blurts. “Where the hell are you going?”

Wait, what?

Harry pauses, his leg half-raised to step off the bed, and peers over at her. Ginny’s propped up her elbows and giving him a quizzical look. He tries very hard not to focus on the hair tumbling over her shoulders and not the creamy patch of exposed skin just below her navel. 

He clears his throat and opts to stare at the wall instead. “I… erm. If you want to stop, I—”

“—WHAT?” 

For some reason, she sounds furious — not disturbed or uncomfortable. 

She narrows her eyes. “Harry,” she says slowly, in the tone she usually reserves for defending him in public. “Did you seriously think—”

But all at once, it’s too much. It’s too, too much. A week of frustration and exhaustion boils over, snapping like a band in his chest. His face hurts from fake-grinning, his heart aches from what he can’t do, his mind reels with what-ifs. 

So Harry just throws himself back on the bed with a groan. He’s not quite sure which way is up.  

“Well, I don’t know!” he mutters, rubbing his hands over his eyes, beneath his glasses. His voice is nearly pleading. “You just told me to wait, and it’s been a shit week, and I’ve hardly seen you.”

A moment later, he removes his hands from his eyes. He blinks a few times as the room appears, but it’s not until black fades to starry pinpricks of light that he sees her overhead. She shoots him a wink, her hair draping like a curtain around his face, and Harry reckons he’s a bit thick; during his griping she must’ve removed her shirt. 

He lets the confusion melt away as his eyes travel over her perfect breasts. He doesn’t know how he’s made it thus far without a good look at them from this angle. Lord knows he’s thought about it. They’re the exact size of his palms... so round and perfect. And pebbled, just in the center, with a gorgeous interplay of lighter and darker pink. 

“Harry,” Ginny says softly. His eyes snap back to hers. “I’m sorry you thought it,” she clarifies with a gentle smile, “but I definitely wasn’t trying to outright stop you. I just… erm.” She bites her lip. “I wanted to try something new, but I knew that if you… kept going… I���d get distracted and forget, and we’d have to wait another night. And I don’t want to. So.” 

Oh. 

“I… distract you, then?” Harry’s lips twitch. He can’t help the male pride from roaring in his chest. He knows he’s good at it — at that. Even if she hadn’t told him a million times, he feels it in the way she clenches and releases against his mouth and fingers. He hears it in the way she cries his name in a hoarse growl. 

Since May, he likes to think he’s gotten amazing at it, really, no matter how she wants it. But seeing as they’ve only shagged once (and how the first time was spent trying and failing to last longer than 10 seconds), he hasn’t made her come during sex. Yet. 

“Harry,” she says flatly, “You know that you’re… embarrassingly good at that. You’ve always been.” 

Harry smiles and moves to caress her thigh. He loves it when she reminds him. He loves it when he’s useful — skilled, even. Especially when it comes to making her happy. 

As if sensing this, a mischievous grin darts across Ginny’s face. “You may want to update your CV, actually,” she says, eyes twinkling. “I didn’t see oral skills on there, last I checked. Not that I want you sharing them.” 

Harry snorts. “Shows what you know. I put that on first thing. May, 1998: Voldemort. June 1998: The second time I caught the snitch with my mouth.”

For a half-second, she just stares at him, her jaw hanging open — but then they both burst into laughter. 

Ginny trails off with a groan, her mouth still stretched in a smile. “Fuck, that’s exactly what I mean! I don’t know how you can be so unsure of yourself while also being so bloody cocky. I mean, for fuck’s sake!” She raises her eyebrows and makes a vague gesture. “It’s the fucking English Channel in my knickers right now! It pretty much always is.” 

Ginny gives a dignified sniff, crossing her arms over her chest. “Which I reckon you know.” 

“Liar,” he murmurs, his fingertips trailing up her arm. “We both know you don’t wear knickers to bed.”

“Fine then,” Ginny concedes, waving her hand. “It’s the fucking English Channel in my shorts right now. Happy?” 

Harry considers this. “I can think of something that would make me happier,” he admits, but then realizes what he’s said. 

There’s a pause. Harry clears his throat — and acknowledges she very much has a point with him not knowing if he’s confident or not. Oh well. He’d might as well be consistent. 

“But I’m… erm. Whatever you want is fine, Ginny,” he says quickly. “And you don’t owe me anything, and you can try whatever you want, and I’m so sorry if—”

Ginny heaves a sigh that ruffles the hair around her face. “No, it’s not that! It’s just that you’ve been so stressed with all this Ministry bullshit,” she mutters, shaking her head. “I thought if I just took the pressure off for one night it would keep you from having to worry about making me happy all the bloody time and we could both just focus on…”

There’s a beat. Ginny worries her lip between her teeth. 

“F-focus on what?” Harry asks faintly. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up. 

Then Ginny looks him dead in the face. Her cheeks are still tinged pink, but her eyes ring with determination. “I want to be on top,” she says flatly. Then, on an exhale: “And I want to touch myself when I do it.” 

Fuuuuck. 

Harry feels his mouth go dry. “I… erm… “ he manages, gripping at the duvet. “I’m… yeah! Yeah, Ginny, whatever you…” He clears his throat and throws his hands in front of him. “Glease!” 

There’s another beat. 

Ginny’s lip twitches agan. “Glease?” 

“Erm. It was supposed to be both go on and please,” he explains, unnecessarily. “But erm. I… I got  distracteddd— fuck!” His voice breaks at the end as her hand drifts below the waistband of his comically tented shorts. 

Ginny ignores this. “Now,” she chides, taking him in her fist. “If it’s ok with you, you’re going to let me take care of you for once. Ok?” 

Harry makes a strangled groan as she picks up speed. “Y-yeah!” he stammers on a half-chuckle. “I’m… fuuuuck.” 

She’s good at this, even if she insists there isn’t much to it. All Harry knows is that her hands feel loads better than his. All he knows is that he loves it when she touches him — any part of him, but especially this one. 

It’s still hard for him to watch her with his cock without exploding on the spot. So he opts not to. Instead, he focuses on the gentle sway of her breasts as her arm pumps up and down, on the adorable, sexy determination that’s etched on her face. He’s so damned transfixed with it — with absolutely all of it — that he doesn’t notice she’s removing his shorts until the fabric slides down his bum. Then, with a soothing murmur, she guides his cock out. He hisses as it hits the cool air, but Ginny doesn’t stop; she eases his shorts down his legs, one hand still working the gathered moisture down his shaft.

He’s about to open his mouth for a moronic, half-formed joke about women and multitasking — but blessedly, she saves him from that. With a final wink, Ginny releases his cock and tugs her shorts down, too. Harry’s not a Ravenclaw, but he can take a bloody hint when he sees one. He scrambles to tug his shirt over his head, his arms shaking in his haste. It’s only when the collar catches on his glasses that he even remembers he’s wearing them — and ah, bugger, that’s lovely, because now he’s blind, and his arm is caught! 

Ginny giggles through his frustrated groan, but in an instant, her fingers are in his hair, her voice a soft whisper. She takes his shirt off the rest of the way, unhooking the collar from his neck. Before he has the chance to say anything else, she rests his glasses on Ron’s bedside table. Which presents an obvious challenge. 

“Erm. I can’t… watch?” he protests, even as she settles him firmly on his back with a push to the chest. In truth, even Harry’s not sure that watching is a good idea — but he’d hate himself if he didn’t ask. He’s fantasized about this exact scenario too many times. Countless wanks have been devoted to the vision of her using his cock, rocking above him, bringing herself off. 

Ginny pauses with her knees on either side of his waist. From this distance, she’s mostly a blur of red and white. “Are you… sure?” He can almost see the blob of her head tilting to the side, curious. 

“No,” he admits quickly.

She giggles again, but he plows on. 

“Right, so… this will be over fast. Very fast. Which is why I wanted to make you happy first, because—” 

He stops as she slides his glasses onto his nose. The world comes back into focus, but Ginny — in her naked glory — doesn’t look pleased. She’s glaring at him, crossing her arms over her bare chest.   

“For starters, Harry,” she says firmly, “you always make me happy.” He makes a noise of protest, but she cuts him off with a pointed stare. 

Harry squirms. He’s a fucking mess, isn’t it? Now it’s turning him on that she’s bossing him around…  

“Secondly,” Ginny continues, eyebrows raised, “I think you’ve forgotten that you’re not the only person in the room who’s getting a bit desperate. I can guarantee that I won’t last much longer than you, which is why I proposed this in the first place. I only asked about your glasses because I wasn’t sure if they’d fog or not and be a bigger bother. Ok?” 

Harry manages a weak nod, but it’s clear Ginny’s tired of waiting. Which suits him just fine. 

“Right then,” she says, that fascinating blush crawling up her chest again. “Right.” 

Harry doesn’t have a moment to question that before she’s settling her knees on either side of his waist. Then she shifts just a bit, draws a deep breath, and does the sexiest fucking thing he’s ever seen: She reaches two fingers inside herself, slides them forward, and stares right at him as she rubs quick, tight circles.

Harry swallows, gripping her thighs; even from here, he can tell she’s wet. So fucking wet. Not that he’d mention it, of course, even if he could. Most of his brain power is spent simply watching as the red triangle at the apex of her thighs draws closer and closer to his cock. Then, with a final shudder, she bites her lip and lowers herself down — and fuuuucking hell, he almost, almost comes. 

Harry slams his eyes shut, biting the inside of his cheek, but Ginny doesn’t stop moving, doesn’t stop sliding, doesn’t stop whimpering. With willpower he didn’t know he had, Harry pulls himself back from the edge, just as he feels her bum rest on his thighs, her fingers continuing to dance. 

When he finally opens his eyes to look at her, he doesn’t know how he holds on for another ten seconds. Somehow he does though, which is perhaps his most prolific accomplishment to date... because she’s absolutely beautiful. More gorgeous and stunning than she’s ever been. Her back is arched, her chest red and heaving, her eyes heavy-lidded; she’s almost mewling as she adjusts, as she shifts her weight against her fingers. 

“Fuck, Harry,” she whispers, her eyes never leaving his. “Fuck. It’s so different… it’s… oh!” Then she draws a shuddering breath, her eyes rolling back, and Harry watches as instinct takes over. He watches as she follows her body just to the edge; she swirls her hips, lifting and lowering herself, as the fleeting pain of their first time disappears forever. 

“Ginny,” he manages, his voice strangled. He wraps his palms around her waist and clings to the last vestiges of reality. “Please. I can’t—” 

Then her expression goes blank, her lips part, and with a final, breathy squeak, she sets him over the brink. “Iloveyou,” she manages in a rushed whisper. “Fuck, Harry, I’m—” 

But as she cuts off, as her voice trails into a moan, Harry feels like he’s leaving his body. Even if he couldn’t actually feel her coming around him, her words would’ve done it. 

He can, though… he absolutely fucking can. 

He can feel her milking him and gripping him as she cries out in ecstasy, and following her over the edge is no longer an option, but a command. His release crests over him like a tidal wave, ripping through his body on a strangled roar. It’s so fast, so blinding, that he can’t even feel himself pulsing inside her. He knows he must be doing that, though, because his entire lower body vibrates in a delirious staccato, his back arching off the bed as she surrounds him, engulfs him, soothes him. Her hips continue their gentle rocking as he ebbs and flows and clenches and releases, as those pinpricks of light return behind his eyes, stealing his breath, reducing his voice to babbled variants of her name. 

He’s not sure how long it takes to catch his breath. He’s also not sure when she lifts away, or if she casts charms to clean up. All he knows is that at some point, he smells flowers. Her head nestles beneath his chin, her body pressing against him, her breath coming in deep, slow sighs. 

And Harry wants to laugh, really. Or cry. Because he doesn’t think she’ll ever know what she’s done for him. How she’s removed the pressure and stress, if only for a night. How she’s taken things into her own hands -- literally and figuratively. How she’s given him the one thing he thought he’d never have: Peace. 

“Hey,” she whispers, trailing her fingers along his chest. He’s surprised the skin there is tender. It feels numb, along with the rest of him. 

He grabs her hand in his and kisses her knuckles. His eyes grow heavy as he peers down at her, as he watches how perfectly she fits against him. She props her head against his chest, blinking at him in the flickering candlelight. 

“I love you,” he reminds her, his voice raw and graveled. A flicker of a smile crosses her face. It always does, when he says that. “Thanks,” he adds, kissing her knuckles. “For… for everything? Can I thank you for everything?” 

She laughs, shaking her head. “Nah. I reckon we both needed a night off. You especially. See how easy it is when I make all the decisions?”

Harry laughs back and threads his fingers through her hair. “We’ll see about that. Maybe by the end of summer, I’ll be able to put proper sex on my CV.” 

Then Ginny pulls back from her chest, her eyes twinkling. And even before she opens her mouth, he knows what it’s in for. “I’ll hold you to that, then,” she says, smirking. “Glease.”

[frumfrumfroo]

What are your favorite movies and TV shows outside of SW? I’m looking for new things to watch since SW was so disappointing

My tastes are pretty eclectic, so I will stick to just things that are either similar to sw or are in the reylo-esque romance wheelhouse and have happy endings:

Chuck. It is a goofy, light-hearted action-adventure show with extremely endearing characters and a very prominent central romance (seriously, heavy romance and there is a lot of payoff for it, you will be FED- it's kind of slow burn but also shockingly NOT slow burn, they are deep into it pretty much immediately). The main couple is the classic Stoic Badass gradually softened by an innocent they have to protect who is a liability in battle but full of the Power of Heart. Chuck is The Heart btw. He is of that vanishingly rare male Beauty (of B&tB) type. He's incredibly generous and open, Sarah is prickly and closed-off. It is Quality. Very much a gender-swap of your typical cliche anime couple lol. I would recommend stopping at the mid-season finale in season 4, because it's downhill from there. The beginning of season 3 is very rough, but it's definitely worth it to stay for the back half, imo. There are several great endings to choose from before things go to shit, so we don't need to talk about the finale. Probably the most tonally similar to SW thing possible without being high/space fantasy. More humour, more silly, but definitely has a spiritual kinship. Has the best THE BEST 'secret revealed' scenes I have ever seen in anything. If you're into that and were hoping for that in ep IX, you need to watch Chuck.

The Shop Around the Corner. 1940 romance/drama film. You've Got Mail is a remake of it. Jimmy Stewart being profoundly adorable, Frank Morgan (aka the Wizard of Oz), various amusing side characters, and an absolutely deathless double blind 'secretly in love with the workplace nemesis' plot that can and probably has been a great reylo AU.

Mirromask. Fantasy/coming-of-age film. Touted as a 'spiritual successor' to Labyrinth by the filmmakers (one of whom is Neil Gaiman) and let me tell you, that is extremely apt. Beautiful, magical, laden with symbolism and Mask Discourse, and has a great ship. I quote it regularly.

Speaking of which, I'm sure you've seen Labyrinth? If you haven't seen Labyrinth, drop everything and watch Labyrinth.

Legend (the Ridley Scott director's cut, not the theatrical cut). Sumptuous fairy tale, runs on proper fairy tale logic, stunning to look at and overall captivating. Tim Curry. Tim Curry as a lonely tragic lord of darkness who tries to seduce the heroine and has drippingly overwrought monologues.

Howl's Moving Castle. Fairy tale adventure/romance film. Beautifully animated, has the ending you want.

The Silence of the Lambs. Thriller/drama film. Actual masterpiece. Use it as a gateway drug to read the books and rejoice that Clannibal is canon and it is spectacular. Just SotL and Hannibal, you don't need to read the other two. Stan Clarice Starling and revel in that ending. Most triumphant 'villain'/heroine ship of all time (he is not technically a villain but for shorthand's sake).

The Adventures of Baron Munchausen. Terry Gilliam 1988 fantasy/adventure film. THE TRIUMPH OF IDEALISM OVER CYNICS I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH HOW HEALING IT WAS TO WATCH AFTER THE TROS BULLSHIT HIT. Jonathan Pryce's spiritual villain is basically Chris Terrio and it is cathartic to see imagination and sentiment conquer him.

Sabrina. 1995 romance film. Modern fairy tale with Harrison Ford. Rejecting what you thought you wanted all your life for the thing you actually need, growing up but still believing in magic, beautiful character development across all the leads. Could be (and is irrc) a fantastic reylo AU.

The Scarlet Pimpernel. 1934 adventure film. High romance, secret identities, play-acting, people who aren't at all what they appear to be, falling in love with your own spouse, Big Heroism, guile and wit and audacity. It makes me do little kicks like a happy baby. This is one of the 3-5 films constantly tied for my favourite film of all time. There is a good quality rip free on youtube. Watch it and fall in love with Leslie Howard (this is possibly my favourite acting performance of all time).

Oh, related note. Pygmalion 1938 or My Fair Lady. (The musical is based on this film and borrows from it heavily, including its much more romantic ending compared to the original play.)

The Mummy. 1999 action/adventure/romance film. Very tonally similar to sw. A fucking great time, A+ characters.

EVER AFTER. 1998 romance film. The flawless and perfect and best ever Cinderella adaptation. This is the most satisfying film in history, maybe, the ending is so good it is amazing it exists. Also, it has Richard O'Brien being slimy. Huge selling point. Grapples with identity and stewardship, is brilliant.

Fruits Basket. drama/romance anime. I haven't watched the new version yet, but it's following the manga so I know the story. The original anime didn't do the whole plot (because they caught up with the source material) but it's wonderful and I still recommend it. The central ship is (spoiler.........) a B&tB type where we eventually discover the main love interest both feels like a figurative monster and turns into a literal monster. He has an incredible speech about his relationship with people's fear, it makes me weep. I called the endgame from the first episode and always thought it was obvious, but there is a red herring love triangle dynamic. It's really not annoying, though, because it is a red herring. (I hate love triangles)

I am Dragon. Russian monster romance film. Beautiful, simple fable with a really great heroine.

Jane Eyre. 1943 Gothic Romance film. It's Jane Eyre, byronic hero x sensible heroine love story with much atmosphere and Gothic drama. I stan this version because I am an Orson Welles fangirl and I'm also not convinced it can be improved upon. Elizabeth Taylor's film debut btw.

Hellboy. 2004 action/adventure/romance film. Defying destiny, reconciling identity, monster romance. The complete package and a great time. Tonally similar to SW and probably thematically closest to it out of this whole list. Don't watch the sequel.

Beauty and the Beast 1987 tv series. Exactly what it says on the tin. Deals with the classic B&tB themes, but in a different way. He's not cursed and will never transform into an ordinary man. The first season is very episodic and 'case of the week', but the second season gets more into character drama. It's dated, but if you give it a chance you can get past some of the cheese factor and it's really a unique experience. Its concerns are SO atypical that it feels like something fandom would make rather than a mainstream network show. It was so massively, insanely popular with women at the time that a record of Vincent (the beast) reading poetry topped the album charts. Also Ron Perlman and Linda Hamilton. Stop at season two. Point of interest: George RR Martin wrote for this show.

Stargate (the movie not the series) sci-fi fantasy about a nerdy guy who accidentally a hero.

Possession. 2009... mystery/supernatural/romance. Okay. This is a whole thing. Lee Pace and Sarah Michelle Gellar. It's based on a Korean film I've never been able to find for some reason, but being Hollywood they ruined the romanticism and nuance of the original in the theatrical cut to make a shitty punative ending. However. If you buy it on dvd and go to the alternate ending (which follows the original story) with around 20 minutes left (scene after Lee Pace's character wakes from a bad dream-go to deleted scenes and select the alternate ending), you will get a very, very interesting character study/thriller/redemption about sincerity within deception, compassion, and a major question about second chances with a positive answer. It's kind of dark and kind of astonishingly idealistic at the same time. The heroine makes a very powerful choice, twice over. It's fascinating. If you're into the conflicted and uncertain period in reylo, the part where he is most ambiguous, and you wanted more of that and much darker shades to it, you might be really into this. Also, it should be noted, there is a MASSIVE height difference and they show it off. The film is flawed (and the seams show on the Hollywood rewrite) but idk, it's fascinating. Shocking to me that they even got to shoot the original ending. It is pretty balls to the wall with its themes on forgiveness.

I would recommend getting into kdramas because there is a wealth of female-gaze tropey amazing content, but always check the ending before getting invested. My all-time fave is the 1st Shop of Coffee Prince, but it's not sw related at all lmao. It has a happy ending with all the elements you'd want, but it's not satisfying in execution, so that's it's major flaw and I find that pretty common with kdramas. One that is maybe more relevant is My Love from Another Star, which has a hero who is a little bit like Ben in personality. The heroine isn't my favourite, though. It does have a decent ending.

Oh yeah- brain fart. Kurosawa films and classic westerns were both very influential on SW. Or you can combine both and watch The Magnificent Seven.

[judestclare]

。· . ˙ ♪  ⌈ kristine froseth + cis female + she / her + solo g + clairo ⌋  have you heard ?  judith “jude” st. clare got signed by disclosure records two years ago ? they’re talented don’t get me wrong but i can’t believe it , they’re only twenty-two years old & some people go all their lives without making it , what makes them special ?  it’ll be interesting to see if the fame & success go to their head because i hear they can be quite careless , pliant & disloyal . but that could only be the rumours because i’ve also heard they’re gregarious , free-spirited & warm hearted . i guess only time will tell .  

     &.     hiii everyone !    i’m meredith, i’m nineteen, i use they/them and she/her pronouns. some more fun facts: i’m a libra, i’m from the est timezone, and really excited to be here !   under the cut you’ll find some #funfacts about the woman , the myth , the legend herself, jude st. clare !  

quick facts:

name: judith victoria st. clare

nicknames: jude — do not call her judith, she hates it

age: twenty-two

date of birth: january 20th, 1998

zodiac: aquarius sun, libra moon ( read here )

gender: cis female ( she/her )

sexuality: bisexual 

positive traits: open-minded, caring, fun-loving, free-spirited, warm-hearted, creative, adventurous, friendly, gentle, gregarious, bubbly

neutral traits: talkative, party animal, reticent, extroverted

negative traits: flighty, careless, disloyal, lazy, dishonest, flippant, easily manipulated/pliant, loud, facetious, unconfident, silly

tv tropes: plucky girl, hard-drinking party girl, the face, good bad girl

mbti: esfp, the campaigner ( curious, energetic, enthusiastic, good communicators, know how to relax, popular and friendly / overthinks things, too emotional, too independent, unfocused, little practical skills  ) 

background: 

jude was born and raised under the ever biblical name of judith in a tiny town in the midwestern united states to a religious family. growing up, her highest aspirations were winning a prize for best chocolate chip cookies at her church’s potluck. matching mary janes with her sisters and dresses with carefully picked cardigans took up the majority of her her wardrobe, and she could recite bible verses along with her times tables.

as teenage years hit, however, the spirit of rebellion was lit in jude. forcing friends and family to call her the much shorter, and in her opinion, much better jude. sneaking makeup in and herself out of picturesque suburban home, many nights were spent at house parties, doing beer pong inside, or smoking cigarettes or a joint outside. style never went full alternative — but baggy sweatshirts and ripped jeans replaced the uniform of sundresses.

two things that never suffered: her bubbly personality, and her affinity for bubblegum lipgloss. even as she tore away from weekly church attendance and skipped school more and more, jude still greeted all former churchgoers, classmates, and teachers in the grocery store with a beaming smile and a knack for remembering details — hi, ms. dawson. how’s little johnny? he’s two now, right? or i heard you were thinking about starting your own bait and tackle shop by the lake, mr. smith. i think you should do it. remember that bass you caught? you’re a natural! she had very little common sense, and didn’t do too well in school — but she always knew what to say and how to say it. she charming and friendly and fun to be around.

thus, jude’s rebellion was more so of the wannabe variety: in such a small town, everyone knew everyone, and everyone knew what she was doing. her parents mostly just waited for her to tire herself out — only it never happened. she dialed back on thick eyeliner, and still sometimes would show up to church on holidays to sing in the choir, but mostly, small town convention and religion were abandoned by the time she was in her mid-teens. 

eventually, she came out to her parents as bisexual, and it was a non-issue — despite religious background, her parents supported her 100%, no matter what clothes she wore, who she hung out with, or who she loved.

jude never graduated high school. by her sixteenth birthday, her attendance record was so spotty that they stopped calling home to let her parents know she hadn’t shown up to school that day — and a few weeks before she turned seventeen, after many screaming matches with her parents and sessions with the school counselor and principal, jude officially dropped out. 

she wasn’t going to sit around the house all day, however, instead driving her clunky car across town to the movie theatre every day, where she worked part time. she remained friends with all the people her age in town still, and made new ones at the theatre. however happy she was, jude was aimless. she knew she had to do something. finally, she turned a passion into a full time hobby, something she never thought would be lucrative. 

by seventeen, that knack for singing in the choir had been translated to covers posted with the gentle strumming of a guitar and manufactured beats. by nineteen, she was writing her own songs and gaining traction on youtube and soundcloud, and two weeks before her twentieth birthday, jude was signed to disclosure records and being flown to manchester. it was hard work, and it took years, but it still feels like a whirlwind to her — one moment she’s in her bedroom, playing bars in her local areas at open mic nights and upaid gigs, and the next she’s signed to the disclosure records. it’s a dream. 

tl;dr — jude is a flighty, fun high school dropout raised in small town middle america by a religious family. she grew into herself and was able to “rebel” despite her sheltered upbringing, and that unique sense of self + her musical talent got her a youtube following from the covers and songs she posted. that youtube following turned into a contract with disclosure two years ago, and she’s been in manchester ever since. 

career: 

a successful album and a successful tour behind her, the not-so-indie anymore lofi pop starlet is on the brink of even bigger fame, though she has a loyal following as she stands. she’s nowhere near super-fame — but she gets recognized in public, and that’s enough to give her the flutters in her stomach that she’s going to make it even bigger.

a regular social butterfly, jude regularly interacts with fans: instagram lives of acoustic covers from her apartment, constant posts to her stories. while her image isn’t exactly not genuine, it’s very curated: she’s careful what she reveals about herself, and the image she’s trying to maintain.

personality: 

image is not a thing, however, in jude’s personal life. still a party girl at heart, she’s down for anything once ... or twice ... or maybe a third time. she’ll say yes to almost anything, and a distinct — though never malicious — lack of loyalty keeps her unbound by romantic relationships or extremely close friendships. she’s friends with everyone, as she’ll tell you, and she has no problem at all with hookups, consistent or one night only.

in spite of this, she develops crushes at the drop of a hat, and will always be there to help someone else out ...  but don’t expect her to keep the same enemies, or to lose her forgiving heart.

jude isn’t dumb, and is pretty much a memorizing machine ( though not eidetic ), can be a little silly or ditzy, especially with sheltered upbringing and big heart. she’s not against being a shoulder to cry on, but when it comes to matters of her own heart, she’s as recticent as can be, never taking much seriously. as a mean youtube comment about her once said: that girl’s got about much depth as a kiddy pool. it wasn’t true, but it’s how she can come off.

drug tw / she drinks pretty consistently, and smokes weed even more so, though she’s not been known to deny any trying harder party drugs, however less consistent she is with it. she hasn’t a problem yet, but she doesn’t seem to be straying from the path that leads her there. if she ever encroaches in on one, jude wouldn’t be able to tell: she’s too busy having fun.

she’s a genuinely kind, caring person ... but jude is a little gullible, and trusts very easily. in spite of her affinity for friendship and relationship hopping, it’d be easy to convince her just about anything is true, or to do whatever bidding was necessary. say the right things at the right time, and jude will be wrapped around your finger. she doesn’t follow directions from authority terribly well, but friends ... that’s a different story.

above all : jude wants to be cool, fun, and liked. she’s a little desperate for attention and affection, and has inconsistent ideals about what’s good for her and the people around her. her self esteem is a lot lower than she makes it seem. 

wanted connections: 

party friends / drinking buddies: if anyone is as into getting drunk and dancing as she is, then call her up and get ready to go. she promises she can beat you in shots.

smoke buddies: a more chill version of the former, if anyone wants to sit around and have a songwriting session or just vibe.

friends: any kind of squad. she’s not the type to have besties, but if you consider her a friend, she’ll latch onto you whenever she gets the chance. 

hookups / fwbs: what it says on the tin, jude is down for anything and anyone (1/?)

crush: jude is very flighty and tends to have feelings come in like a hurricane, with the potential for them to leave just as quickly — this person would have jude wrapped around their finger.

unrequited: basically the opposite — someone likes jude, she’s a #dummy who doesn’t realize it and leads them on because she’s flirty with everyone and would probably also make out with anyone

enemies: jude doesn’t make many of these, but if someone is annoyed by her and lets her know it ... well, she’ll do everything in her power to make them even more annoyed. if you can’t make them like you, make them hate you even more.

tentative friend: on the opposite end of things, this person doesn’t vibe with jude but she’s half-oblivious to it, and is desperately trying to make them like her 

manipulator: jude LOVES attention, so if anyone needs any evil bidding or shit stirring done, just pay her some. she’d make an excellent lackey. 

anything else! seriously! just let me know what you want and we can brainstorm <3

[rawiswhore]

Shawn Michaels x Fem Reader- “Hands Off The Merchandise”

Shawn Michaels has so many signatures.

From his iconic "sweet chin music" finishing move, to his tights with slightly torn hearts all over them, and especially, his bodybuilder pose he does in the ring where he crouches on the ground and flexes his muscles.

Seeing Shawn do his iconic signature bodybuilder pose and flex his muscles, especially when you could see his biceps, you eventually had no idea how strangely muscular his biceps are when he flexes them in that pose.

Granted, Shawn is nowhere near as overtly muscular as The Ultimate Warrior or Lex Luger, but Shawn does have some pretty ripped arms.

But you love his muscular biceps he flexes in the ring.

Shawn was getting sexier in 1996 since he was ditching and growing out of that outdated, tacky mullet, but by 1997, Shawn was getting hotter and sexier as the days went by.

On August 11th, 1997, the same night Shawn wore that tacky green shirt with beige colored shorts, looking more like your father at a family barbeque than a wrestler and had a match with Mankind, you were laying in bed with Shawn in a hotel room, laying on top of him.

On that night where Shawn wore that green shirt with beige shorts, you could really see Shawn's muscles bulging out of his biceps that weren't being hidden by those spangled shawls he wore with those iconic outfits he's notorious for wearing in the ring.

The lamp on the nightstand next to the bed you and Shawn were sharing was turned on, you shouldn't miss the way Shawn looks tonight!

Your hands were gripping onto his biceps, giving them a few gentle squeezes.

Shawn was unbeknownst to why you were doing this to him, but you're gonna explain why.

"Shawn" you said. "I had no idea how muscular your biceps are, especially when you flex them when you do that crouching pose in the ring while fireworks shoot out, that's why I'm squeezing your muscles"

Shawn nodded his head, smiling at you.

He may as well say his iconic "hands off the merchandise!" quote from his entrance theme, but nah.

You could've squeezed Shawn's muscles while lying in bed with him anytime this year, especially in July when one day before his birthday when he was shirtless in just a pair of shorts and making fun of Canada, but you chose August 11th, 1997.

Though, that wasn't the day you noticed how rather large Shawn's biceps are.

"Shawn" you said to him "Could you flex your biceps for me again, like you do when you're in that 'crouching pose' you do in the ring?"

Shawn curled up his upper arms, his fingers balling into fists at his palms, where his biceps became harder, showing off how muscular his arms are.

Your fingers and hands squeezed his biceps, hard as a rock, his biceps in between your thumbs and index fingers.

Your face lit up when he flexed his arms for you, spreading an ear to ear smile.

"Awwww, thank you!" you thanked him.

"No problem!" he replied.

"You might not be as muscular as...Hulk Hogan" you said "But you still have such nice arms and biceps to wrap me in and hold me"

When Shawn heard that, he wrapped his arms around you even more, hugging you and holding onto you.

"You're so much sexier and hotter than he is, anyway" you admitted. "And a better wrestler"

(Author's note: I found a news report from 1998 about pro wrestling's increasing popularity, and on that program, a black woman said she watches wrestling just to see male wrestler's muscles and bodies. Wonder if women ever watched and lusted over Hulk Hogan and Macho Man for their muscular physiques despite the fact neither of these men are all that attractive in the face?

Actually, when my father told my mom I have a new obsession with pro wrestling, she asked me why, and asked me "Is it because of their muscles? Their crotches bulging out of their tights?")

"I wish you could've posed for Playgirl this year instead of last year" you confessed "And showed the world your penis like Peter Steele, the lead singer for this goth-ish band called Type O Negative, did when he posed for Playgirl 2 years ago"

Though, at least Shawn posed for Playgirl when he was slightly getting rid of his mullet.

"Why?" he asked.

"You look hotter and sexier than ever before this year" you admitted. "I'm glad you got rid of that outdated mullet you had years ago"

"Really?" he asked "Well, thank you!"

You nodded your head after he asked "really".

"You're welcome!" you replied, smiling back at him.

Your hands aren't just squeezing onto his biceps, your thumb unwrapped around his bicep, where you caressed up and down his biceps and muscles.

Your hands and fingers made him feel tingles on his skin, his nipples even tingling and feeling erect thanks to your touch.

Shawn needs something like this tonight, though he wishes he could have something like this throughout this year.

One of your hands moved from his biceps to his chest, where you caressed your hand up and down the hair on his chest, his chest hair in between your fingers.

Since your fingers are running through his chest hair...

"You've got this chest hair that I can run my fingers through" you purred to him, adding what else he has.

He looked down at his chest, he secretly enjoying the touch of your hand.

Shawn has so many parts of his body that are perfect for you, including his long, beautiful hair for you to run your fingers through, though hair isn't really a body part.

And speaking of body parts, while you were squeezing his muscles and caressing his chest and arms, your calf was nudging and bumping against his calf (and you don't mean calf as in baby cow), your calf brushing and rubbing up and down his calf.

His legs were much hairier than your smooth, hairless, feminine legs, but of course, he's a guy, and women can't have hairy legs, vaginas and armpits in the WWF!

But Shawn loves your leg nudging against his, so smooth and silky.

"You looked so hot tonight" you admitted. "When you were wearing those white pants and wrestled with Mankind!"

Although, Shawn's looked sexier.

"I'm just a sexy boy!" Shawn joked, smiling at you.

"But you are my boy toy" you said to him sternly, lifting one of your hands and pointing your index finger at him, as if to tell him he’s been a naughty boy.

He chuckled hearing that.

"I regret that I didn't squeeze your muscles at night throughout this year, or even in the morning and daytime" you confessed, saying that after Shawn stopped chuckling so he can hear you "I wish I could've done it the day before your birthday this year, you looked so sexy that day, or even on your birthday"

All of this sexual tension between you and Shawn had to lead to something, that something eventually was lovemaking.

And you squeezed and caressed his biceps throughout kissing him and foreplay, and of course while he was thrusting in and out of you.

You also occasionally caressed up and down his chest during foreplay and while you were making out with him.

You even caressed and squeezed his biceps while the two of you drifted off to sleep, you fell asleep with your head in the crook of his neck (and eventually on his chest) while you squeezed and caressed his biceps and he fell asleep like this.

And of course, you sometimes took time to caress his chest as well, sometimes one hand was squeezing his bicep while the other was caressing up and down his chest.

You're glad that you did all of this tonight before Shawn wanted to win the match against Davey Boy Smith in England, Shawn really was a disrespectful asshole, which is a shame, how hot did he look during that match?

________________________________________________________________

I got this idea for a fic when I was looking at a picset on tumblr of Shawn on August 11th, 1997, when he was wearing that infamous green shirt and beige shorts combo, and never realized how muscular his arms are when he flexes them in that "bodybuilder pose".

Though, I contemplated when to set this fanfic considering Shawn has looked hotter and sexier than that afternoon...

[interesting-blog-name]

SLIGHTLY NEW ALBUMS I LIKED (Little Simz - GREY Area; Monsune - Tradition; Backxwash - God Has Nothing to Do With This Leave Him Out of It)

More loose reviews that I write and instantly want to get out of my Word document and into Tumblr without much of an overlaying theme between the albums or any planning as to which ones I’ll be releasing at which point, but it is what it is. This time I’ll be compiling some recent-ish albums I’ve enjoyed, two of which I’ve come to know from TheNeedleDrop (I try not to watch reviews before writing down my opinion btw), and one EP from an artist I like. Here it is.

Little Simz – GREY Area

Little Simz, the 26-year-old British rapper, is an artist I’ve loved the first time I heard her, when I listened to Selfish for the first time and saw her cover of Feel Good Inc. in triple-j’s Like A Version. Today, May 30th, I was planning on listening to White Chalk by PJ Harvey, but from what I read, it’s a pretty depressing album, and I’m not in the mood for that right now, so I picked GREY Area from my future listening list.

It’s really nice to hear a rap album like this once in a while. The instrumentation is organic and well thought out, her flow is amazing, and her lyrics have so much substance and personality to them, ranging from the happier, more reminiscent tone in 101 FM to the much more aggressive tracks Offence, Boss, Venom and Pressure, she’s always giving her take on life, telling the experience of what it’s like being a black person with big dreams in England, seeing friends die while she tries to go somewhere in life through music.

The main tone she picks for her self-narrative is an unapologetic view of the world around her; she tells the listener: “’til now I ain’t ever been the selfish type, ‘till now I ain’t ever told nobody no, don’t get it twisted. This shit ain’t happen overnight” in the biggest song off here, Selfish, featuring the most calming and lavish pianos and violins in this album, and an amazing feature by Cleo Sol on the hook. Pressure features an amazing batch of verses all about. Same thing with the intro, Offence, with its bold, empowering chorus; although the track comes off more playful with its cartoonish sound effects nearing the end than the raw message of the track mentioned previously. A great, high-spirited track to start off the album.

What isn’t as high-spirited is the next track, Boss, or, to be fair, almost all the other tracks in the album. Boss is a big fuck you to anyone you might dedicate the song to: the hook has Simz’s most aggressive delivery in the whole record, and the entire message is about getting over those who hurt you and coming up.  The second verse is something else.

Wounds, featuring Jamaican singer Chronixx, deals mostly with the gun/crime problem ever-so-present in marginalized communities all around the world, and she tells the story from the perspective of both herself and as a companion of the “gun man”, repeatedly mentioned in the song (“When a gun man only knows self-hate, them bullets show no love”). I’m not super crazy for Chronixx’s hook, or the much slower tempo of the track, but it fits well with the groovy instrumental. Venom, on the other hand, is a super exciting, menacing song. She goes all out over the violins playing in the background, but unfortunately, the track burns twice as bright to last half as long.

To lighten the mood a bit, 101 FM brings the most electronic instrumental, with cheerful, banging 808s and synths, and lyrics about her come up as a rapper, probably the verses where her British accent and slang dominate the most, giving them a more personal feel somewhat. Pressure doesn’t feature the most compelling instrumental or hooks in here – the Little Dragon refrain is mixed very poorly and the vocalist just doesn’t do a great job -, but the verses compensate for that, especially the first one, probably one of the most heartfelt and important ones in this album. Therapy talks about Simz’s struggles with finding comfort in therapy. The instrumental is average for the project, but still slaps, so that’s nice.

Sherbet Sunset is an ode to a broken relationship, and a theme that could be handled so poorly by other artists is handled masterfully by Little Simz. In three verses, she displays so many sides to what I assume is one relationship, so many emotions and thoughts that she shares, it really feels like she’s transcribing something of a focused, bright mind rush over the track, and it amazes me how she can reveal her feelings so well on a track like this, progressing from the regret of not seeing how it’d go wrong, to the anxiety that comes from spending all that time for seemingly nothing, to coming to terms with it in the last verse (although not quite). It’s a stunning song now that I listen to it again.

To close it all off, we have Flowers, mainly a tribute to various artists from the 27 club, with mentions of Jimi Hendrix and Amy Winehouse in the verses, trying to relate to their struggles with drug addiction and quick fame. It’s incredibly powerful and a great finisher.

I don’t dislike one track in GREY Area. It’s well conceived, a great statement, it really feels like she gives her all to make every track memorable, and even though her delivery is mostly monotone throughout the whole album, that also works to her favor, as she has a very unique and recognizable voice. So the lyrics are extremely well written, and the only reason I don’t give more examples of that is because I got a whole lot of school shit to do, the instrumental work is clean and precise, and I don’t have a whole lot to complain about. Check this shit out if you haven’t.

 FAVORITE TRACKS: 101 FM, Venom, Selfish, Offence, Boss, Pressure

LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: lol nah

 8.7/10

“Why you wanna all dress lies as truth? Have you ever seen what silence do? I don’t wanna see no violent troops putting out fires that haven’t been started”

 Monsune – Tradition

Damn I did not expect to like this as much as I did.

Monsune is a Chinese-Canadian singer who has recently been gaining some popularity from his amazing song OUTTA MY MIND, which features a funky bassline and high-pitched guitar playing that some have compared to Childish Gambino, specifically his album “Awaken, My Love!”. I decided to check out this short EP by him to see if he had anything more to offer, and it’s safe to say, he does.

The first track off Tradition already shows what this guy can do with his production. It starts off with the same vibe off of his previously mentioned biggest track, but on steroids: a prominent bassline, pitch-altered backing vocals, sunny guitars, and drowned out drums. His voice is also reaching higher notes in this song than in OUTTA MY MIND, but then in the middle of the song it all slows down for a very welcome beat change that shifts the song from this summer anthem to a very chill R&B tune. It’s amazing stuff, although I don’t understand why he chose to put some very noticeable autotune in this part.

CLOUD is my least favorite from the EP, but it’s still a very solid song, it’s just not amazing. The bass is still very strong, and the bridge later on in the song is addictive as shit. After that track comes OUTTA MY MIND, and then his style completely switches in MOUNTAIN, which starts off with some solo guitar and his low, beautiful singing. It’s actually really moving for some reason lol. It then picks up in the hook, the drums kick in along with what I assume is a keyboard, and his voice reaches the top of his range for the backing vocals, it’s a very well-made song.

JADE finishes Tradition off extremely beautifully, with a smooth acoustic guitar intro over a nice-ass bass, some ethereal, trippy scenes of Monsune floating over the ocean and appearing out of thin air in front of you (probably not you, the listener). And then all of a sudden this madman screams off the top of his lungs in the middle of the track and I fucking love it.

The flaws this EP has are mostly related to the mixing, which I think can be a little too harsh in some sections such as the big breakdowns in JADE and MOUNTAIN. Plus, I know lyrics aren’t a focus on a project like this, but it would be nice to get something more than love songs in the future perhaps. Still, loving this EP, so glad I checked Monsune out. You should too.

 WORST TO BEST: CLOUDS, 1998, JADE, OUTTA MY MIND, MOUNTAIN

 8/10

“Don’t you wanna come down? Cause I’m so bored of walking on the same old sky”

 Backxwash – God Has Nothing to Do With This Leave Him Out of It

God Has Nothing to Do With This Leave Him Out of It is an album by American rapper Backxwash, who received a new wave of attention after Anthony Fantano reviewed this album in his channel and gave it a decent 8. I haven’t watched the review yet, but I was interested in checking it out because of the high score, and especially since when I looked it up on Spotify, the songs only had around 8000 views.

Dark subject themes and the whole dark trap aesthetic are the core of this album. I, personally, have always been a fan of aggressive, heavy rap music, from more underground names like gizmo and Fukkit, to the more mainstream variant of these sounds, like XXXTENTACION. This album, however, operates in somewhat of a separate lane.

Many of the dark, edgy rap I used to listen to religiously back in the day was borderline mindless. Shit about ripping someone open, hollow flexing, except separated from mainstream rap only because the rapper in question is screaming their brains out when talking about designer clothes, instead of mumbling like your average Lil Baby, and, of course, personal problems, depression, being mad about whatever it was. Unlike its other contemporaries, however, it seems Backxwash has much more thought and elaboration into what she wants to yell about. Instead of hiding behind bass-boosted rather formulaic instrumentals, she takes the more scenic route, with still very dark, but more intricate gothic beats, sampling various religious speeches and implementing them into songs about black magic and overall unhappiness. The Black Sabbath sample that opens up this album should be enough for any listener to immediately understand what they’re about to get into, as the title track brings heavy percussion and some of the most graphic lyrics in the album, which it already doesn’t lack. Lines about downing pills and vodka, contemplating suicide, and blank vocalizations of anger (“I want war with these bitches, I want corpses and weapons”).

The track that resembles an average edgy Soundcloud rap song the most is Black Magic right after, with its own interpretation of the “ay” flow, shouted with a tone reminiscent of someone like Craig Xen. The big difference comes with the much grander production, especially the growling guitars that get introduced halfway, reminding the listener of Backxwash’s skill as a producer. From what I could tell, she was responsible for the production of the tracks in here, and considering there are no vocal guests except for Malldate’s quick appearance in Into The Void, I’m assuming the features listed in the tracklist are all producer credits as well, the feature in this track being Ada Rook, providing the amazing guitar work for this song.

Spells is mixed for me. I don’t enjoy the attempted singing in the chorus, and it falls completely flat to my ears; the beat is hard as ever, but the lyrics feel slightly disconnected with each other. At one point, she’s talking about going to Hell to her mom, at the other she mentions doors opening and closing in an office and how there’s no one in some corridor, and it doesn’t go anywhere from that, with lines such as “heart is so dead with tissue” not exactly evoking any sort of emotion or imagery.

Black Sheep is the most effective song out of the first four; it seems to filter all the positive aspects of the other tracks and package them into one quick serving. The beat is chaotic and in a constant state of unrest, the lyrics are centered and aimed at various of Backxwash’s problems in life, such as her father, people who want to bring her down and put her “in line on the X and O’s”, and overall venting. After that comes a brief interlude, the first of two that don’t have much use in the album except as pallet cleansers. It’s followed by Into The Void, a track that mentions her paranoia of being harassed and possibly killed when walking around in the streets and the deli. It’s haunting, and definitely the best song in here; it is laser-focused in the exact way I wished the previous tracks would be. Her vocal delivery is extremely expressive, and she tells the story in a way that gives the listener a brief, but at the same time immense glimpse of the reality that trans people face and have to go through, in a morbid fashion.

Adolescence is very short and eases the pace a bit after the intense emotions of the last. It’s a message to her younger brother that quickly descents into a confession of her inner struggle, mentioning possible overdoses and being too old for the 27 Club and fearing going to therapy. What’s great about this song is the fact that, even in such a short amount of time and with a less explosive instrumental, Backxwash manages to evoke her emotions so well; this is definitely what she does best in this record, and it overcomes the times where her delivery is flawed and her words are slurred and hard to understand. After this comes Amen, and holy fuck is this an angry song. Criticizing the hell out of the church, Backxwash comes at greedy pastors and their irresponsible spending when the churchgoers who support him are in need. My big problem with this song is the fact that the hook, as impassionate as it is, doesn’t do much for the subject, and the verse is way too short to have any impact with its theme. Lines like “these politicians politicking” don’t help much either.

The very distorted second interlude, Heaven’s Interlude, takes us to the last track, Redemption, the least intense song in here, which is appropriate as a sendoff. She expresses her frustrations towards her dad’s frustrations towards her being trans, and while the entire sentiment of the song is great and well formulated, I can’t find a way around the lines “Fuck these fucking boomers, fuck these fucking losers. Fuck theses motherfucking fuckers in their fucking two truck. Fuck these fuck(sic)abusers, and fuck these fucking rumors.”, they just emanate Limp Bizkit energy.

God Has Nothing to Do With This Leave Him Out of It is a very passionate, real, well produced and well-conceived album; it bears themes that are immensely important to be brought to the music scene, and by mixing that message with its explosive and polished production, it amplifies it a ton. However, as powerful as her deliveries are, I believe Backxwash can go much further with her songwriting and song structuring in the future, as well as her intonation, because that was really all that was keeping this album from being legendary. If she can do more of this in songs that are longer and super focused around whichever topic she decides, she can make something legendary. And thank God she got reviewed by Fantano, I hope she can take this opportunity and make something huge out of this.

 FAVORITE TRACKS: Into The Void, Black Sheep, God Has Nothing to Do With This Leave Him Out of It, Adolescence, Black Magic

LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: Spells

 7.7/10

“Chosen one, sad bitch, lowest scum. Coldest, huh, black sheep talk to ‘em. If the situation changed I would have said the same shit, exactly the same.”

[thephantomporg84]

[REDACTED] be complaining reg. the reactions of having "placed the cultist island Fortuna off the coast of Florida" while having the gall of "It’s the story & the way it’s told that should fucking matter" & "Who cares? It’s fictional geography, you idiots." Feels a bit like failing World-Building 101. I mean, Red Grave based on London would also be a callback to Dante's early concept of being a Brit.

Someone already sent me the whole post of hers that I’m pretty sure you’re referring to lmao. I’m in a particularly cunty but pleasant mood rn, and analysis is kind of my thing, so lets’s break it down, shall we?

Maybe someone can send this her way and… learn that tiny little brain of hers a thing. 😉

It’s fictional geography called world building, you idiots Karen after the cut:

‘I love how a number of shitheels have screeched amongst themselves on this hellsite about how I had placed the cultist island Fortuna off the coast of Florida or somewhere around the Gulf US states (re: the fanfic & project link in my header), whining that it should’ve been in Europe, namely Italy.’

An admission to stalking profiles is not exactly the best way to start a self-righteous rant or advertise your… magnum opus, but go off, I guess.

‘Not only that, but they whined about “plotholes and inconsistencies” without elaborating on what the latter are. The asshole who made the rant was annoyed when I used a poem as a spell in the story (“if I heard that, I’d turn off my PS4.”), but I’m sure she didn’t bitch about the cutscene before the last Agnus boss fight in DMC4.’

Like the movie The Room (2003), it’s just easier to say “all of it” is bad because “all of it” contains plotholes and is inconsistent in tone, has terrible half-baked ideas and plot threads that remain unresolved and/or do nothing to further the plot, is rife with poor + inconsistent characterization, has a lack of any knowledge how the medium it exists in is made, and in general makes me wonder how much pottery enamel you’ve been huffing to think any of this was a good idea. Howeverrrr, in contrast to you, Tommy Wiseau is kind of odd and weirdly charming both in general and about his terrible movie — he’s found glory and success in its terribleness. You, in contrast, remain a miserable cunt with delusions of grandeur.

Dante and Agnus’ Shakespeare bit is actually a pretty well known trope called Ham-to-Ham Combat. Dante and Agnus are both ridiculous Large Hams in DMC4, and when two Large Hams meet, in general, they are likely gonna try to ‘out-over dramatic’ each other. This can lead to a scene becoming either really funny or really corny (or both) really fast. If things go too far — and they do, in this case — the scene can become a Hormel Event Horizon.

‘…but they LOVE the plotholes & inconsistencies if Capcom makes the latter, and writes a terrible story! And Crapcom’s canon for DMC is as straight as a paperclip or a dog’s hind leg. Hypocritical pricks.’

Subjective opinion is not, and never will be, objective fact. People are, as of when I checked again in the last ~5 minutes or so, absolutely able to enjoy whatever media they want regardless of what the general consensus on the quality of that media is.

As an example, I enjoy The Room (2003) despite its terribleness and it never fails to make me laugh, while your magnum opus makes me want to huff pottery enamel so the pain will stop despite you thinking it is the work of an idiot savant.

‘They were also mad that I wrote Dante as a wiseguy who is a little more low-key about it due to the circumstances— instead of being a pathetic manchild airhead that tries too hard.’

You didn’t write Dante.

You wrote Reboot!Donte — a fucking terribly out of character version of him, at that.

‘I was primarily concerned about moving the story along. I didn’t care about where a fictional island is supposed to go.’

You literally had one (1) job, Karen.

‘…Meanwhile, not a single character in DMC4 had an Italian accent, so uh, why should I give a flying fuck where I put it?’

Haven’t you been like… shitting on the DMC staff… for terrible writing… this enti— You know what? You’re obvs way too dumb to notice that contradiction, so I’ll let it slide.

Just… a word of advice, if I may? Don’t ever watch dub TV shows. That last brain cell would fuckin’ just burst all over your carpet.

(Actually, don’t watch subtitled shows either. An extremely popular anime that was set in Italy just wrapped and all the characters — le gasp! — spoke fucking Japanese. You would shit.)

‘I wasn’t paid to write any of what I wrote, but be my guest & send a PM if you want to throw money at me. By all means, do that.’

Oh, thank fuck, because they would have been ripped off, big time.

[ btw, you sound p. jealous of people that write/do creative work/commissions for ko-fi/payment tho. Not a good look tbbh. If it’s any consolation, though, I don’t get paid for making fun of you and/or analyzing your dumb bullshit, either. :( ]

‘The pricks at Capcom didn’t even bother giving us a proper DMC4 and it was a half-assed game, with the latter half being hasty filler material. The “special edition” they coughed up in 2015 was just glorified overpriced DLC.’

Ya know, you gotta be pretty far up your own ass to think this much of your opinion. And I’m saying this as a person that’s pretty far up her own ass like 85% of the time.

‘And another thing, Redgrave City in DMC5 seems to be in England, yet no survivors speak with English accents or slang/dialects.’

Pretty sure no survivors had speaking roles.

If you played the game you’d know this.

‘Meanwhile, Dante and Vergil had lived there when they were kids (until age 8), but they both have ordinary American or Canadian accents. Furthermore, how did the twins make it to the USA or Canada? According to the little booklet in the DMC1 game case, Dante’s office is in modern America.’

You know that invoking the imagery of a specific place without naming your location is normal and standard practice, right? Overwatch even does this (For Ex: Byōdō-in (平等院), Uji, Kyoto Prefecture, Japan is the inspiration for Hanamura, Château de Duingt, Duingt, France for Château Guillard, etc.)

Furthermore, you know the original DMC was a rejected first draft of Resident Evil 4, right? This is what retcon is for. You at least know what retcon is, right?

‘…That information isn’t very important, but I’m bringing it up to illustrate a point that being a fucking pedant about geography in a fantasy game is idiotic, even if the setting is akin to modern Earth.’

So is freaking the fuck out and sending death threats over a fantasy game but you didn’t let that stop you either lmfao.

It’s actually super important to establish your scenery and the way your world operates, especially in a written work in which readers are dependent on your vision and your descriptions, and if you were a decent writer, you’d know this.

‘It’s the story & the way it’s told that should fucking matter.’

YOU HAD ONE (1) JOB, KAREN.

‘What US states are the Arklay Mountains located in?’

General description puts them in the U.S. Midwest. Raccoon City itself is stated to have a population of ~100,000 at the time of outbreak, and the only city in the Midwest that matches that population in 1998 is Springfield, Missouri, with a pop. of ~110,000.

Springfield is on the Springfield Plateau of the Ozarks region of SW Missouri. So they’re part of the Ozark Mountains.

This all took less than ~3 minutes to google, btw.

‘Where is “Zanzibar Land?”’

I actually just wrote a comprehensive answer to an ask a few weeks ago about this. It’s actually stated to be in Tselinoyarsk (Целиноярск), the (fictional) area of the former USSR in which Big Boss carried out the Virtuous Mission/Operation Snake Eater in 1964. Tselinoyarsk itself is heavily implied to consist of parts of Kyrgyzstan and/or Tajikistan. If you played MGS3 you’d know how important the setting and the varied environments/climates are to the game mechan-

oh yeah wait you believe in segregation of story and gameplay mechanics. I forget you’re completely tone deaf sometimes lmao.

How far is ‘Salem’s Lot or Derry from Bangor? Who cares?’

Stephen King does, quite a bit. He even has a map on his website of ‘his’ fictional version of Maine:

My disappointment is immeasurable, Karen.

[purplesurveys]

701

Answer as if answering for a friend/family. No names in this survey. Do you know what friend you'll be answering these questions about? Sure! I’m gonna make a friends survey not about either one of my two best friends this time around, lmao.

Friend's General Info (Put idk if you're unsure)

How long have you known your friend for? Where did you meet? I’ve known them for nearly three years now. We joined our mutual org in 2017 and we were batchmates during the application process. How old is that friend? She’ssssssss 21. She’s a year younger, but she just has 1998 baby vibes haha. When is his/her birthday? January 1, 1999.

How many birthday parties of theirs have you been to? Zero. She hasn’t thrown any ever since we met and besides, her birthday falls on a holiday/in the middle of a three-week long break. It would be impossible to see her then. How many siblings does that friend have? She has one brother who’s younger than her by a year.

What grade is that friend going to? (if any) She graduated a year ago. At what school? (or workplace) She works in PR, but I’m not saying where. Describe that friend's appearance: She’s the prettiest in our friend group. She’s quite vain and likes putting on makeup and bringing her makeup kit around ; she also likes fixing her hair and cleaning her hands with hand sanitizer/alcohol every few hours. Her wardrobe is super chic and is always updated. Suffice it to say she’s super good-looking.

Is your friend good-looking? ^ I just said it, hahahaha. She’s objectively very pretty. What personality traits would you use to describe that friend? Hmm extroverted, ambitious, brave, assertive, aggressive, strong-willed.

Friend's faves

What is your friend's favorite color? I have no clue. My guess for her would be something muted though, like something cream-ish or off-white. Friend's favorite food? Ooh THAT I don’t know her enough to know. I do know she craves fried chicken a lot even though she’s allergic to them. Favorite music? She likes chill-ish and indie sounds. Favorite band? I know she likes Paramore like me, but her main favorites are LANY and Lauv. Favorite TV show? She talks about How to Get Away with Murder allllllll the time. She likes Game of Thrones too but I don’t know if it’s her favorite. Favorite hobby? This I don’t for sure know either. I know she doesn’t like being a homebody or getting stuck somewhere for too long, so I’m gonna take a guess with going out, eating out, traveling, etc. Favorite way to spend time with you? Catching up with gossip, judging other people lmao (as long they did something that justifies the judging), talking about her job, partying. Favorite store? I honestly don’t know, I’ve never gone shopping with her. Favorite celebrity? Asa Butterfield.

Friendly nonsense

Is he/she the type of person to go to you for help? Not always but she’d typically run to me when she’s being stupid about love or relationship stuff. Who's clumsier - you or them? Me, for sure. She’s very put-together; not a clumsy bone in her system. What do you guys talk about most of the time? She already graduated and is already working, so in the few times we’re able to see each other we usually mainly catch up, her with how much she sometimes hates her job and me updating her about the happenings in our org and the current gossip at school. Do you text him/her a lot? We don’t text but we chat online maybe once every two weeks. We’re also in a group chat for our college friend group so I always encounter her everyday. Does that friend have a deepest, darkest secret? She probably does, but we’re not close enough for her to tell me or for me to nag her about it. Has that friend done anything rebellious? For sure. She can be pretty crazy. I know she has tried hard drugs, for one. What concert have you guys been to together? Which one? Haven’t been to a concert together. What friend has your friend been to (without you)? Which one? I...dunno if she’s been to any concert, honestly. If she has been it was probably before we even met. Who would win in arm wrestling (be honest): you or your friend? Hahaha me. Mostly because she hates doing anything that’ll make her have to be physical. Has your friend changed at all during the years you've been friends? Nah she’s always been the same. What's the biggest fight/argument you guys had? What was it over? We’ve never had one. She knows not to mess with me and I know not to mess with her. What was the stupidest argument you ever had? What's the best memory you have with that friend? Probably all the CJWs we did together. Worst memory? We were included in drama for a while within the org (mostly her, but I got involved because I’m her friend lmao) and that was stressful and it was nothing I wanted to be a part of. Would you jump off a bridge for this friend? If the stakes were high then yeah. Would you eat a roll of toilet paper for this friend? A WHOLE ROLL? I imagine it would feel disgusting eugh. Probably not, unless I got treated to something crazy big after. Would your friend tell you to rip off a piece for them to eat? No, she’d be laughing and taking photos of me. Is your friend talented at anything? She doesn’t have any ~loud talents like singing or dancing but she’s good at what she’s interested in and what she does for her work. Would they rather (base answers on YOUR opinion/judgement) Your friend would most likely rather: french kiss a dog or their grandpa Would they ratter drink 2 tabelspoons of soy sauce or eat raw meat? See their favorite band for a thousand dollars or one they hate for free? Have their house egged or their car broken into? (suppose they had a car) Be immensly bored to tears or so stressed they can't take it? Wake up next to a live tarantula or be chased by a bat? Babysit 10 kids or have curfew at 4 pm? Eat glass or throw up glass? (ew) Have the ability to fly or to read minds? Find out they were adopted or be shipped off to another country for good?

Now Confess Who was the friend you chose to talk about? Kate. Do you think you got most of these answers right? Probs 3/4. I’m not too confident about the others.

[techouspeaks]

Classic Reviews: Big Bad Beetle Borgs and Metalix!

“Three typical, average kids were founded by Saban! Just by luck, got picked up and now they’re a PR spin off!”

I know, that was bad and I should feel bad but I don’t. Least not that much...

So, I was looking to review something and I decided to do some series that I’ve done only brief look upons, such as the series from my top “90s Kids Shows That No One Talks About” and go on from there.

I’ve talked about Big Bad Beetle Borgs before but not in good details. I’ll try to keep from repeating too much and just get my basic thoughts on it. The real question is whether this series is better or worse than Power Rangers?

Big Bad Beetle Borgs is a series by Seban Entertainment who gave you series such as Power Rangers, X-Men (1994-1997) and the infamous but kinda famous dub of Samurai Pizza Cats. Like Power Rangers, Seban obtained clips from the original B-Fighter sentai series from Japan and combine it with it’s own story, characters and gags. The show ran for two seasons which is the same as B-Fighter and first aired September 7th 1996 and the second season aired in March 2nd 1998. 

The show unlike Power Rangers, kinda had a sitcom element and wasn’t as serious as Power Rangers would get. It had a more comedic tone, making this especially for younger kids. It was basically the Power Rangers for kids that couldn’t handle the “heavy” drama that Power Rangers, least the later series, had. Does that make it good or bad? Well let’s look at the story.

The story focuses on three kids as I said, name Drew, his sister Jo and their friend Roland. The three kids are basically your average kids as the theme states. They like to read comic books and kinda had the 90s theme going on of liking things that were “EXTREME” and used a bit dated 90s catchphrases. Though I will say that they weren’t too bad on that. They did use the catchphrases a lot less. In fact I think Flabber, the ghost they freed did more the catchphrases than the kids, now that I think about it. I’ll get to him in a bit.

One day the bullies of the town (And I guess their school. I’m trying to remember if you ever did see the school.), dare them to go into the Hillhurst Mansion, an old, fallen apart, abandon mansion on the outskirts of town that’s said to be haunted. When the kids do, both the bullies and our three heroes discover that the house is indeed haunted, by monsters that are loosely inspired by the classic horror monsters of the golden age. The monsters chase the kids around the house trying to eat them, until the three kids stumble upon an old pipe organ. When the kids play the organ, it frees a ghost named Flabber, who you could argue is trying to be like Genie from Aladdin. He’s got blue skin and tries different impressions and is able to grant wishes. At least one wish out of gratitude. 

The kids wish to become the Beetleborgs, the heroes from their favorite comic book series and as he does, he accidentally releases the villains of the comic, the Magnavores. Now it’s up to the three kids to be Beetleborgs and save their town from the Magnavores and try to get them back into the comic, which the kids make no hesitation to agreeing upon.

Later series, Metalix had the Beetleborgs go up against new villains and try to gain the “Astral Borgs”, which were special and more powerful allies, along with the Monster’s new recruit of “Little Ghoul”.

Is it as bad or good as Power Rangers? To be honest, I think it’s a little better than Power Rangers, at least in my perspective and mainly in the campiness of it. The one thing about Power Rangers is that it’s doing all the corniness with teens to near adults and sometimes that works fine in some series like my favorite series Wild Force, Ninja Storm, Dino Thunder and Maho Tsukai! (Just kidding!), Mystic Force, but other times, especially the first series, it’s pretty painful to sit through, least in my opinion.

BBB handles this campiness well. It knows what it wants to be and gives the kids what they want. They want to feel like they can be the hero, they want to see Flabber doing fun little magic tricks, they want to see the fight scenes and they want to see some good old fashion slapstick. Being it’s kids and not teens or adults as the main heroes, the campiness fits more at home in this series. 

The series also has a bit of heart to it. You can tell the actors playing their roles had a good time. Well, at least for the most part. Some of the kids kinda feel bored at times. At least sometimes. Other times they seem to enjoy their roles fine but it just seems to be the adults that had the most fun. The kids act fine in this but other times when the drama was big, their acting could have used a bit more energy, but they were kids at the time and for Seban no less. I mean Seban is not exactly a dub of quality as many would know! You can tell they were at least trying with what they were given.

The characters are well likable too. The kids for the most part are likable and charming and seem to have enough character to them enough to identify them. Drew is the typical kid that wants to be the leader and the “cool type” but he’s also down to earth. I’m glad they didn’t make him too cocky or too “extreme 90s” like so many of the “cool kids” were at that time. 

Jo is your tomboy girl but she can be like her brother, she can be rather down to earth when she needs to be. I also like how they explained why she looked and sound different after the original actress left. Wolfie casts a spell from a magic book, changing her appearance and then Flabber counters a spell so that she would look the same as before to everyone else, but to those who witness the first spell being cast would see her as her new appearance. That’s actually kinda clever. Usually when an actress or actor leaves, they do something, like another option they could have went with was to have Jo go to boarding school or something and have her be replaced by another tomboy girl. Shoot, maybe a foreign exchange thing but I guess because Jo was well liked by the kids, they just didn’t want to replace the character so they just made a clever idea to keep the character and explain why she looked and sound different. 

Roland is the only one that I kinda don’t get into. He’s fine, he’s just not very interesting and I don’t remember him getting a whole lot of character development or focus a lot. Make whatever racist comment about it. To me, I think they just didn’t know what to do with him but needed a 3rd character and an excuse for the kids to get the comics easily and for the kids to be really close to the adult characters of the Comic Book store, without it being seen as creepy.

Though one character I barely remember was Josh. A kinda resident “popular kid” who temporarily becomes the White Blaster Borg to fight and defeat the Shadow Borg, in a Yin Yang sorta way. I just remember he and Drew were rivals for the affection of the popular pretty girl in their town and that he would lose his powers forever since his sole purpose was to defeat Shadowborg, which he didn’t care too much because being a superhero was too much for him.

Flabber, while you can tell he’s trying to be the Genie from Aladdin, especially the fact he has blue skin and has magic, as well as do impressions of other things and famous people and references, he doesn’t feel like a total rip off. He does generally have his own sense of identity and it’s hard not to like him, least for me. He can be a little annoying with his antics, but he’s still quite charming and helpful and usually I don’t like Elvis impersonators, but he doesn’t do that too much despite being dressed like one. Put it short, I like Flabber and while I can see what he’s trying to do, he doesn’t feel like a total rip off the Genie. 

Flabber also helps defend the kids against the Hillhurst Monsters who tend to try to eat the kids. By the end of the first series though, they ultimately quit doing so and do occasionally help the kids out on their adventures.

The Hillhurst Monsters too have their own personalities and quirks. In fact, I think it’s safe to say that that’s what drove the kids into the series. The actors who did the monsters seemed to have a lot of fun and a lot of the series episodes focused on them despite being mostly comedic relieves. Each episode ending credits had the monsters do some crazy high jinks while the credits rolled. They each have their own back stories and we even see some personal endeavors they have to face from time to time.

First you have Count Fangula who is a vampire that isn’t quite competent in his vampire skills. He tries to but more often then not fails.He almost gets sent away by the master of vampires that looks exactly like Vlad the Impaler, for having a victim count that’s too low. He’s the only one that can tell what Wolfie is saying. He also seems to be the most sensitive sorta, next to Frankie, but also sensible. He knows when to back down most of the time and seems to have good surviving instincts out of all them and is easily scared the most.

Wolfie or Wolfgang is a werewolf that eventually joins the residents of Hillhurst in the first season. He’s probably the most bravest as he has tangled with the bad guys more than once. He barks and makes Scooby Doo like noises and as said, Fangula understands what he’s saying and translates. He acts sorta like their dog and sleeps in a dog house next to Frankie.

Frankenbeans or Frankie as he’s called, is as you expect a Frankenstein type monster. He’s talks more like a toddler and literally has no brain, which is the cause a lot of jokes involving him. He’s rather the most innocent of the monsters because of this. He can be a bit more threatening when angered, sometimes even the other monsters can be a bit intimidated by him since he’s got incredible strength.

Mums is a 5,000 year old mummy who was once a prince that got entombed for kissing Cleopatra in public. He’s a bit sarcastic and can be very funny and comes up with the most insults and jokes. He also seems to be the most encouraging and helpful of the bunch, giving ideas for plans and schemes, sometimes even thinking of good solutions for the Beetleborgs from time to time.

Eventually, the Hillhurst residents get another resident called “Little Ghoul” who happens to be the Grim Reaper’s niece in training. She’s sarcastic, violent and a bit of brat! So much so that despite her pint size body, she even scares the other monsters especially in her true form, which she hides under a hood. She has high respect for the Astralborgs, the powerful allies I mentioned earlier and will help them out without hesitation. 

The first bad guys were actually kind of interesting. They’re the typical bad guys that just want to cause trouble for the sake of it but they have such personality that makes them stand out. The three main goons are Typhus, Noxic and Jara and they actually prefer chilling out and scaring the heck out of people most of the time. Typhus loves to eat, Noxic is the smart one that was voiced by Impmon/Veemon from Digimon and Jara was the sassy female villain that also gained a few chuckles since she was the more competent of the two.   Even Vextor, the main boss has some pretty funny moments and interesting design. (My favorite line was when he said to his three henchman  "If there's a brain cell among you, it's dying of loneliness!" )

The bad guys for Metalix though are pretty lame...There’s nothing really that stands out about them. I mean, I thought it was pretty funny that the main boss, (yeah I don’t care about his name), actually grants a kid’s wish to have a monkey instead of a dog after the boy helps him. That’s pretty funny but yeah, the villains in Metalix are pretty weak.

I actually forgot to mention what Metalix is about. It’s pretty much the same thing as the first series but we’re introduce to the new villains and a “twisted” comic book artist named Les Fortunes (Get it?) that is the brother to the comic book artist for the BBB comic books, Arthur “Art” Fortunes. Art decides to help the BBB by making new armor and weapons that Flabber can bring to life. He actually does show up in the first season but returns more often in the second season.

This sounds cool but it kinda ends up pretty weak. For one thing, again not so creative villains. Again, at least with the first ones, they have personality. Here they don’t. The concept of the good artist vs the bad artist is an interesting idea but it’s not done very well here. First, Les is pretty creepy and unsettling also aside from being twisted, what did he actually do to warrant being in jail? I can think of one thing and lets just say he shouldn’t be around kids... Plus, the brother, Art, while likable enough, their rivalry is too childish and out there for even this series. I mean, yeah the adults here act way out there but this is way too out there.

Does this mean the second series is bad? Well, it’s not horrible or unwatchable, it’s just kinda weak in some areas but it still does focus on random adventures, introducing new characters including a fourth Beetleborg and focusing on the Monsters of HillHurst, so it doesn’t change too much from the first plot. It’s just kind of weak with what should be an interesting concept and the new villains just lack a personality that stands out. Shoot, the new villains are called the “Crustaceans” and only one is actually a fish monster that’s not even based on a crustacean of any sort! Did one of the staff members had something against sea food and decided that should be the villains? Even so none of the other Crustacean soldiers are based on aquatic animals. You got Horribelle that’s based I think on a mantis, a fish monster and the main boss is a triceratops.

So yeah new ideas that just simply needed to be thought out better,  but the heart and most of the other adventures remain roughly same as the first. 

The animation and effects are cheesy as well as you would expect from a Seban Power Ranger’s spin off, though the parts with the Comic Book transformation and transits are done very well and creatively.

I can’t be too hard on this show. It’s a show that isn’t good but it’s charming and fun and that’s what this series was meant to be. A cheesy, creative and fun adventures with a colorful cast of characters. Sure there isn’t anything much for adults in it but if you like corny, cheesy goodness, I would give this a go, especially if you are Power Rangers fan and can enjoy the corniness that PR can bring. There’s nothing at all bad in it for kids or any horrible lessons, so I definitely do recommend it for young children to watch it. I give the first series 6 1/2 stars out of 10 even if I’m being a bit generous and Metalix 5 1/2 stars. Not good, not bad. Just a right in the middle corny fun to bug out on.

BBB: 6 1/2 Stars!

Metalix: 5 1/2!

Level: Good!

[sage-nebula]

pokemon (games) and/or pokeani for the meme?

I’ll go ahead and answer for the anime, since although I prefer the games, I think the anime works better for memes like this.

the first character i ever fell in love with:

Ash Ketchum, way back in 1998. He was pretty much an instant fave for me, and no doubt contributed to my love of snark and sass (given that his name could have just as easily been Sass Ketchum and would have arguably been more accurate).

a character that i used to love/like, but now do not:

Manon. I liked her well enough at first, but the way her stans constantly bashed and degraded Alan while using that degradation to prop Manon up (often by making him her trophy boyfriend, which is really disgusting when you consider not only the age, but the maturity difference between them) quickly ruined any fondness I had for her. The fact that she got off scot-free in the show without having to realize or own up to any of her own mistakes or shortcomings (while Alan took the fall for all of them instead) didn’t help.

a ship that i used to love/like, but now do not:

Mmm, I can’t really think of anything for this one. I don’t think there’s anything that I used to seriously ship in this show that I don’t ship now. There are casual ones I can think of that I no longer even casually ship, but even those were more of a shrug and acceptance rather than something I actively liked.

my ultimate favorite character™:

ALAN [SYCAMORE], FIRST OF HIS NAME, HEART OF A CHAMPION, SOUL OF A DRAGON. It’s honestly no contest. I cannot think of a single character in the whole of the PokéAni that could come even close to comparing with him. I still block on sight for any nonsense hatred or condemnation thrown his way, and I regret nothing. 

prettiest character:

I mean … I know I’m biased, but …

My valiant dragon son is beautiful. I mean, in particular, his eyes …

He has dragon fire in his eyes. You don’t get much prettier than that.

my most hated character:

Paul. He’s straight up abusive to his pokémon, and him learning to give them the absolute bare minimum of care and praise at the end of a match (or losing to Ash at the League, which I literally do not care about at all) is not enough for him to curry favor or earn forgiveness in my eyes. He can go burn, and for that matter, he can take that bastard Damian from the OS right along with him as he does.

my OTP:

Ash/Misty will always be endgame to me, as well as Jessie/James. 

I do think that it’s probable that Ash and Misty would end up dating other people as they grow older—that Ash would date Dawn for a while, for instance, and that Misty would have a relationship with Lana—but at the end of it all I think they’d find their way back to each other, once they’ve grown up and matured and realized that, while their first crushes on each other might have been puppy love back when they were kids, now that they’re older … it’s deeper and more meaningful than that. It’s real.

As for Jessie/James, I think those two are soulmates, however you want to interpret it. Maybe their relationship stays platonic forever. Maybe their relationship is romantic. Maybe their relationship floats in a nebulous space between platonic and romantic, undefined as Meowth rolls his eyes from the other side of the balloon. Whatever the case, I don’t really care as long as they’re together. That’s what matters most.

my NOTP:

Aside from the obvious ones of bestiality, incest, and pedophilia, my answer to this would have to be Alan/Manon. I never liked it to begin with because of the age / maturity gap between them (honestly, Manon acts like Bonnie, the show parallels her to Bonnie, and Alan is so mature people often mistake him for an adult despite Malva referring to him as a boy, how is this even a question), but between how the show handled their relationship and how the ship’s stans (who are always Manon stans, from my experience) handle it / treat Alan, I honestly want to scrape my brain out with an ice pick every time I’m reminded this ship exists. It’s a trashboat of epic proportions as far as I’m concerned.

favorite episode:

It’s less one single episode, and more one trio of episodes: OS022 - OS024, a.k.a. “Abra and the Psychic Showdown”, “The Tower of Terror”, and “Haunter vs. Kadabra.” Those three episodes left a major lasting impression on me as a kid, in a good way. That depiction of Sabrina as a villain with a creepy monotone, who had a small “doll” that represented her childlike innocence (that was still villainous in her innocence!), and the way she presented a formidable threat that no one else in the series had managed until that point … not to mention the backstory with how she drove her own parents away (and turned her own mother into a doll), how she was always waiting for her father to show himself again, how she drove herself to that point by obsessing over her powers (I would too, ngl) … man. I loved everything about that trio of episodes. I still love that trio of episodes. There are quite a few episodes in the OS that I turn to regularly whenever I just need something to watch, but I think those three are extra special.

saddest death:

LATIOS IN THE GUARDIANS OF ALTO MARE. At first I was like, “wait, did anyone who wasn’t a villain ever even permanently die?” AND THEN I REMEMBERED LATIOS AND HAD TO CLUTCH AT MY HEART FOR A SECOND. RIP LATIOS, YOU ARE MISSED.

favorite season:

It’s a tie between the very first season (Kanto), and the second season (Orange Islands). While both had their faults, what I like most about those two seasons that latter seasons (even in the OS, with Johto!) lack is how organic they feel. Kanto especially was created before the Pokémon Anime really decided on its identity, and chose a formula to stick to for successive seasons, most likely because they weren’t sure they were even going to get successive seasons back when they were making it (the series was supposed to end with Mewtwo Strikes Back, after all). As a result of this, we had some truly original episodes. We had the three episodes with Sabrina that I mentioned above, but we also had episodes like “The Ghost of Maiden’s Peak” with a Gastly that could talk for reasons unexplained and who impersonated humans to keep a dead girl’s legend alive; we had episodes like “Mystery at the Lighthouse” with a giant Dragonite that was never explained or seen again (also, still mad at Team Rocket to this day for attacking that poor baby); we had episodes like “Electric Soldier Porygon” where everyone traveled into the internet with Porygon to stop a computer virus (and give 800+ Japanese children seizures, but that wasn’t supposed to be part of it); and we had episodes like “Attack of the Prehistoric Pokémon” where Ash discovered that a bunch of fossil pokémon were living underground and, in the process of all this, almost got eaten by an Aerodactyl. And the Orange Islands, while slightly more tame, was similarly allowed to be pretty free and fun given that it didn’t follow the badge quest formula, and the Orange Islands weren’t drawn from the games, meaning that the anime team could do whatever they wanted with them. So between the anime not yet having a set formula in season one, and the anime being set somewhere completely new in season two, seasons one and two of the PokéAni had plots that were basically like:

That was every day in the first two seasons of the PokéAni, because the first two seasons of the PokéAni were already so goddamn weird, and they were better off for it.

Aside from how weird and strange the plot could get, though, I also feel that the first season especially felt a lot more organic than even the second because the effects of the journey were regularly shown on the main characters. They were lost pretty much all the time (which is why they needed to keep Tracey for Johto, tbqh; he was the only one who had a sense of direction). They were often dirty and longing for baths and laundromats. In “Wake Up Snorlax” they’re out of food and practically crying as the town they reach doesn’t have anything to offer them because it’s been so long since they’ve eaten. Ash, Brock, and Misty are two children and a teenager traveling across the continent by themselves. It makes sense that they wouldn’t always have a nice place to sleep, that they’d run out of food, that they’d be grimy and exhausted a good deal of the time, especially since they’re always lost. (They were lost for like 70% of the first season istg. The narrator even lampshades when it takes them two weeks to reach Vermilion City and they all cheer.) I really liked how the first season in particular showed them tired, grody, hungry, and lost for a good portion of the journey. It felt so much more realistic than the perfect, spotless journeys that came later on.

least favorite season:

Outside of Alan and everything to do with him, I’m not much of a fan of Kalos. I’m also not really a fan of Alola because I don’t think slice of life really suits this series as much as the adventure genre does, but it had some good cameo episodes and also has Gladion, so it has its good points, too.

character that everyone else in the fandom loves, but i hate:

Paul and Manon. Paul in particular is incredibly popular and I will never understand it.

my ‘you’re piece of trash, but you’re still a fave’ fave:

Honestly, I’m not sure? I think the closest I get to this is Jessie and James, since they’re two grown adults constantly stalking and bullying a ten year old boy, which would be insanely worrying if not for the fact that said ten year old put them in their place literally every other day. (Plus I like to think they actually do really care about him at this point. It’s what I’d like to believe, anyway.) Maybe Cassidy and Botch would be better contenders, though. They have no redeeming qualities, they’re just assholes, but I’d still be super mega excited to see them come back.

my ‘beautiful cinnamon roll who deserves better than this’ fave:

ALAN deserves better than all he has suffered, and definitely deserves better than this goddamn unappreciative fandom. He is a burned cinnamon roll, been through hell and back, slightly charred, and he deserves the world.

Apart from him, though, Ash every time he gets put through some hell because of fate or destiny or legendaries or whoever the hell has decided to mess with him this week. After everything that went down in Kalos, can we really blame him for going to Alola for a vacation? And yet he’s STILL pulled into Ultra Wormhole nonsense! My god, just let this poor boy rest, he deserves it!!

my ‘this ship is wrong, nasty, and makes me want to cleanse my soul, but i still love it’ ship:

Listen, I’m not one of those fools that thinks it’s canon, but I always loved the fic trope of Giovanni being Ash’s father because he and Delia had a fling way back in the day and I am grateful to that awful musical for giving it to us. The angst potential is real for this one, and I also like the idea of Giovanni allowing Jessie and James to chase Ash all over creation despite how it completely tanked their careers and potential not just because it “keeps them out of the way,” but also because it’s a way for him to keep an eye on his son without them ever knowing that’s his son. There’s some good fic potential there.

On a more serious note, while I don’t think it’s “wrong,” or “nasty,” or “makes me want to cleanse my soul,” I’ve always kind of shipped Spencer/Delia, too. The idea of Spencer Hale and Delia Ketchum finding love together later in life, and Ash and Molly becoming step-siblings as a result, is one that warms my heart. I know that Molly’s mother comes back at the end of Spell of the Unown, but … well, that was just a post-credits scene and so it’s easy to ignore. Come on, let Ash have a little step-sister. Let Molly have the mother she always wanted. It’s what they deserve.

my ‘they’re kind of cute, and i lowkey ship them, but i’m not too invested’ ship:

I wouldn’t say I’m highkey invested in any romantic ship in this show, haha. I mean, let’s be honest, it’s not like any of them have a chance at development outside of small hints here or there, you know? So there’s no reason to get all up in a twist about it. So I think that most ships I ship could fall into this category. Cute, but no need to make a fuss about them.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 099: The Fanfic Dorms (Part 2)

Previously on BnHA: The kids returned to U.A. Aizawa promptly ripped into Rescue Squad Jr. for going off on their own to save Bakugou, and the others for knowing full well what was going down and not doing anything to stop it. He told them he expects them all to regain his trust by getting their provisional licenses so they can do that shit legally. Bakugou unexpectedly paid Kirishima back for those expensive night vision goggles and it was cute as fuck. Aizawa gave a quick tour of the dorms and the kids moved into their rooms. Then they decided to have a competition to see whose room is best, and so far it has been delightful.

Today on BnHA: The kids continue our tour of the 1-A dorm rooms. Satou ultimately wins after bribing all the others with a goddamn cake. Ochako calls Rescue Squad Jr. outside to talk to Tsuyu. They have an emotional heart to heart because Tsuyu was apparently feeling awkward and uncomfortable about the whole Rescue-Squad-breaking-the-rules-over-everyone’s-objections thing, and so was everyone else apparently, and they’re also feeling anxious because of everything that happened with All Might’s retirement and all that, even though none of them actually says it out loud, and basically all of these kids are a hot fucking mess and I’m glad they can be there for each other now to sort their shit out. The next day, Aizawa announces that they’re gonna start training to come up with new super moves for the upcoming provisional license exam.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 145 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

so here we are, one chapter away from the big one-double-oh. All Might has just retired and the world is bracing itself to enter a new era without the Symbol of Peace. the villains are regrouping with Tomura as their leader now that All for One has been captured. basically a lot of shit went down that shook the world to its very core. so now that we’re approaching this milestone, I can only imagine what kind of momentous events will be --

OH WAIT THIS IS A CHAPTER ABOUT THE KIDS INVADING AND CRITIQUING ALL OF EACH OTHER’S ROOMS SO THEY CAN ALL DETERMINE WHICH ONE IS “THE KING OF ALL DORM ROOMS”

or at least it’s starting out that way, lol

WELL I DON’T KNOW! ARE WE?? I don’t actually mind either way, as long as I continue to ignore every panel with Mineta in it as I have been doing thus far!

you see, there are two panels here of Mineta being Terrible, but I can just skip right past them!

and if I do, I end up with

DRAMATICALLY SLEEPY TODOROKI SHOUTO

it’s a highly effective reading strategy and I strongly recommend it. though I expect I’m hardly the first to pioneer this technique

wow, what

holy shit. this Ochako is amazing

and literally the chapter title is talking about how we’re moving from two digits to three digits. like, this fucking guy needs to get out of my fucking head already, it’s seriously starting to creep me out

(ETA: but like, between the chapter title and the “premium Ochako” and Deku’s fourth-wall-breaking narration wondering how long we were going to keep touring rooms, Horikoshi sure was feeling cute this chapter wasn’t he)

RED ALERT EVERYONE WE’RE ON THE FOURTH FLOOR, ALSO KNOWN AS BAKUGOU’S DORM FLOOR, I ALREADY MEMORIZED IT

anyway, Kirishima’s telling them that Bakugou already went to bed, so I guess they’re just gonna skip him. what a loyal friend and how respectful of them to comply with Bakugou’s wishes

though if they do decide to just barge in on him later, you won’t see me complaining. though they will all die though, so that’ll be sad

so now it’s Kirishima’s room!

wow. flame curtains and a goddamn punching bag. and is that a fucking boombox. when’s the last time you even saw one of those. what is this, 1998

does his wall clock have muscly arms. and he didn’t put his boxes away omg

what a scathing fucking indictment of this sweet angel. I’m disappointed, Hagakure

Shouji’s room is so empty it probably has a weird echo

there’s actually less stuff in here now than before he moved in

YO, SERO’S ROOM THOUGH!?!?

whoa. I need to check this one out in the anime to see what kind of color scheme we’ve got going on

(ETA: lots of warm and neutral colors. his is definitely my favorite room out of the 17 that we actually see. the kid has good taste)

AND NOW TODOROKI’S ROOM. I BET IT’S JUST A NORMAL BOY’S ROOM

half the girls in the class can barely control themselves. because he’s so handsome and mysterious

what the fuck

jesus did he teleport his old bedroom into this new building or what. fucking redid the sliding doors and everything

they’re asking him how he did it and he just deadpans:

WHAT ARE YOU

(ETA: look, no joke will ever top “sorry I punched you in the balls.” but this is a close second. Shouto’s delivery is key and he fucking nails that shit)

oh my god Satou’s room has an oven. he made a fucking cake. you have a whole kitchen available for use downstairs dude

he’s offering everyone cake oh shit

Satou wins hands down. it’s over. it’s allllll over

so now they’re all heading to the girls’ dorms

oh my god I fucking love Jirou so much

a fucking drum set and everything. guess this place is going to be lively

Hagakure’s room is filled with stuffed animals and flower patterns and shit. very cute and totally what you would expect

I feel like Mina somehow has the same bedspread as Kirishima. or like close to it

(ETA: is that a fucking surface pro)

and Ochako’s room is super cute and somehow even more Japanese than Todoroki’s

she even has the laundry rack. even though they probably have dryers in the laundry room downstairs

ah, now they’re finally getting around to addressing the fact that Tsuyu hasn’t been around this entire time

Ochako says she’s not feeling well

so they’re moving on, but then Tsuyu’s cracking the door open and peering after them

what’s going on here. sudden Tsuyu angst?? her of all people? my god

holy fucking shit Momo tried to fit a goddamn library and a four poster bed into her room

and I say “tried” but she fucking did it though

wow. I guess it’s really true that once you’ve slept on a king size mattress you can’t go back

now we’re actually doing the vote. we’re seeing this thing through to the end huh

Mina is describing this as the first ANNUAL King of the Rooms contest lol

obviously it’s Satou. like, was there ever any doubt. dude was a lock as soon as he whipped out that fucking cake

(ETA: so apparently Satou got six votes, meaning that all of the girls voted for him plus one extra person. since he wasn’t allowed to vote for himself, I wonder which of the guys voted for him too. also I bet you Tokoyami ended up coming in second place just because all of the guys thought his room was cool as fuck)

Shouto just wants to go to bed now

CAN HE SLEEP?? CAN THIS BOY JUST FUCKING SLEEP ALREADY??! FINE, BUT MAKE SURE YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH FIRST!!!!

this was amazing. even though my child slept through it. it was perfectly in character so that part of it was great too. his room is probably in one of those bonus things anyway

(ETA: oh so we can have three bonus pages’ worth of Ochako being poor, but you can’t be bothered to give us even a glimpse of my son’s dorm room, huh Horikoshi. wow)

oh my god, before Shouto can leave, Ochako’s asking if he can spare a minute. and also Deku, Iida, Momo, and Kirishima

in other words, Rescue Squad Jr. ohhhhh boy what is this

Tsuyu???

wow. it looks like she’s apologizing for what she said to them back at the hospital. about how them rushing off to break the rules was no different from what the villains do

(ETA: actually it might be the opposite. I have no idea. The anime makes it seem like she’s shocked and disappointed that they went even after her objections. meanwhile Viz’s version makes her out to be ashamed for trying to stop them in the first place. as for me, I got nothing. pretty sure she’s actually feeling a mix of both, which is why this got her so worked up)

wow, it’s really been weighing on her huh

Tsuyu nooo. what the fuck. Tsuyu feels?? in my fucking chapter 99

WHY ARE YOU ALL JUST STANDING THERE IS NO ONE GOING TO HUG HER?!?

so even though she’s still coming to terms with it, she wanted to come talk to them anyway so that she didn’t have to hold it in anymore. “so that I could be able to have fun talking with all of you again”

oh my godddd

and Ochako says it’s not just her. “everyone wants to erase the incredible anxiety they’re feeling”

shit

whoa. the power of the fanfic dorms strikes again?! look at these feels in the middle of my domestic fluff?!!

and like, Ochako’s making it to be more about them wanting to make up with the Rescue Squad and letting them know they support them and such, and I don’t doubt that was the main reason. but also, all of them must be feeling so much anxiety just in general. All Might’s done. there are villains out there and they’ve already been attacked twice. they just want to be normal kids sometimes and hang out and have fun

given that, I really think the dorms were the best decision U.A. could have made right now. not only for safety reasons and let’s-flush-out-the-traitor reasons, but also because right now all of these kids are going through the same thing, and it’s just good for them to be around each other so they can bond and support each other that much more. because shit’s rough right now. and it’s only going to get rougher from here on out

so wow, that was unexpectedly touching and poignant just now

and now Kirishima is coming over and putting his hand on her shoulder, which, good. like I guess he’s not actually gonna hug her since ~she’s a girl~, but he looks deeply moved and he’s apologizing and thanking her

and Deku’s watching and thinking pretty much the same things I was. about how everyone’s just feeling the anxiety and pressure and doing their best to get things back to normal

(ETA: I can’t believe I forgot to make mention of the fact that Iida calls Tsuyu “Tsuyu-chan-kun.” like, that’s peak Iida right there. “I’m being considerate of your name preferences, but we’ve still got to be proper.”)

all right chapter, you have two pages left. I’m ready for you to end on some sort of shocking and/or really cool note to lead into THE BIG ONE

so now it’s the next day and Aizawa’s telling them more about the provisional license exam

he says it’s a big deal since the licenses are directly concerned with matters of life and death. yikes, that does sound serious

apparently there’s only a 50% average yearly passing rate

(ETA: and apparently they can up and change that whenever they damn well feel like!)

YO LIKE THREE HEROES BUSTED THROUGH THE DOOR ALL OF A SUDDEN

hell yes. fucking excellent. it’s about time Deku got some sort of special move

this all reminds me that we never got Bakugou’s hero name. this fucking kid. his dorm room, his name... he just sits out fucking everything. fine, Kacchan. fine

(ETA: listen guys, I know I always say please no spoilers, but I really need someone to tell me right the fuck now whether there will ever be any scenes in which we see even just a part of Bakugou’s room. right now I’m betting on a combination of Tokoyami, Ojiro, and (surprisingly) Deku’s rooms. Tokoyami for his “everything is black” aesthetic, Ojiro for the “I barely changed up any of the original furniture” aesthetic, and Deku because I would put money on Bakugou having at least one All Might poster up in his room as well

as a matter of fact, the only reason it stops at posters is because he was too embarrassed to bring his own All Might bedsheets to school. that’s right, Kacchan. I know all your secrets.)

 BONUS:

I can’t believe the bonus wasn’t Kacchan’s fucking dorm room GODDAMMIT

but this is an amazing image of All Might. I don’t even know if it goes with this chapter or not but there was nothing else to put here so

fucking legend. will never be matched. I bet he would’ve beaten Thanos. Avengers what were you even doing goddammit

(ETA: YO. DID YOU ALL SEE THAT TRAILER THOUGH. OMG)

[mccartneyandwings]

Interview: “Denny Laine talks Wings, ‘Wild Life,’ Linda McCartney and more”

Denny Laine had a short interview with Mark Hinson from Tallahassee Democrat on September 21, 2017. The original link is here.

Before Denny Laine joined Paul McCartney & Wings in 1971 for a solid decade of hit singles and albums, he and the poodle-eyed Beatle had been pals for several years. 

After all, Laine was a member of The Moody Blues in the early days before the band shifted into symphonic art rock. In 1965, Laine sang lead on The Moody Blues’ hit “Go Now,” a cover of an American R&B tune originally recorded by Bessie Banks.

“I knew Paul,” Laine said during a recent phone interview from California. “We used to go out and see people. We’d go out and see Dylan or Jimi Hendrix or The Lovin’ Spoonful or whatever. We’d go see American bands that came over to England just because we were curious. So, I had pretty much [of] a friendship with him because I was in London at the time. And that’s how I got to know him. George Harrison was also our neighbor when I was in The Moody Blues. ... They(The Beatles) used to come by and play us their demos and their acetates. We were pretty close with them. We were both fans of each other. ... We all started out together as kids, really.”

Expect to hear plenty of Laine’s work with Wings, as well as The Moody Blues, when he performs on Friday night with The Cryers at The Junction at Monroe Street.

“We take a modern approach to the songs,” Laine, 72, said. “I’m not trying to sing like Paul, I don’t like copying people. I don’t like to live the past too much.”

Even though Wings racked up some of the biggest hits of the ‘70s — “My Love,” “Silly Love Songs,” “With A Little Luck,” “Live and Let Die,” etc. — the group got off to a rocky start with the critics. The spare, stripped-down Wings debut album “Wild Life”(1971) was dismissed by Rolling Stone magazine as “rather flaccid musically and impotent lyrically, trivial and unaffecting.”

Laine thinks “Wild Life” has stood the test of time.

“People like it a lot more now because of its rawness,” Laine said. “The point was we were just trying out the band on that album. It was just a case of let’s just rehearse a few songs and go in the studio. Let’s not get too big time about it. I like that album.”

To get into the back-to-the-roots spirit, Wings rented a bus and dropped in on various universities around England to play surprise concerts for the students. No press. No hype. No expectations. Just let it rip.

“The reason the critics knocked it(‘Wild Life’) was because they were expecting a big production,” Laines said. “But you know, you have to understand that when a band is just starting you’re not in the mood to go in and do that. We were not trying to follow The Beatles or The Moody Blues, we were just trying to do our own thing. The fact that we went out and started turning up at universities just to play meant that we needed to play live to an audience to get into the feel of the band. Get into the confidence and the rest of it. So that album really was a result of that band where we were at that time. You know it was a take-it-or-leave-it type of attitude.”

Plenty of critics and Beatles fans also scoffed when McCartney recruited his wife to join Wings. Laine is quick to defend Linda McCartney, who died of cancer in 1998.

“Well, I liked Linda a lot,” Laine said. “She was a great influence on him, so that made it easy on me. I didn’t know Linda until I was in Wings. She was very good for him at that time because he was going through a lot of Beatles’ legal problems, the whole Allen Klein situation. It all made him literally retreat to the hills of Scotland. She was his support system. I liked her for that alone. But I also liked her because she was very honest about things. She was not trying to be some big star. She got pushed into that more than she wanted to be. She was not a musician and she was the first one to own up. She didn’t want to be in the band. But he got her into it. ... She wasn’t trying to be a rock star.”

He added: “She was misjudged by people a lot, I think. Really deep down, she was a good lass. She had his back, which was great. It wasn’t an easy time for her at all.”

In 1973, Laine and the McCartneys headed to Lagos, Nigeria, to record Wings’ official masterpiece, “Band on the Run.” 

“Paul had his cassette of the rehearsals stolen, so we had to start from scratch,” Laine said. “It was a very badly equipped studio (in Africa). We made the backing tracks there and then came back to London and finished them off. That’s about it, really. ... It was just me and Paul, really, in the studio. We just wanted to do something really raw and get the feeling right. It was what worked.”

“Picasso’s Last Words” from “Band on the Run” featured Laine singing the opening lines and a little percussive help from Laine’s old friend, drummer Ginger Baker. Before the Wings stint, Laine performed with Ginger Baker’s Air Force band (as well as The Electric String Band). Baker is notorious for having a hot temper (please see the documentary “Beware of Mr. Baker”) but Laine did not share any red-headed horror stories.

“I don’t have problems with Ginger,” Laine said, and that was that.

McCartney always encouraged Laine to write and co-write songs for Wings, such as “No Words” and “Again and Again and Again.” In 1977, Laine and McCartney hit pay dirt with a sing-along song called “Mull of Kintyre.” The collaboration became an instant classic.

“He had an idea for a song,” Laine said. “I went around to have breakfast with them up in Scotland. ... I heard the chorus and I said that’s a potentially hit song. So the next day we went and finished it off. We sat down and wrote the lyrics and put it together. Then we brought in the Campbeltown Pipe Band and they were all excited. It was the first time they’d ever been in a studio and it was fun. We recorded the pipes and drums outside so we got the echoes off the mountains. It came out at Christmas and it was a big hit (in England). It was a B-side over here.”

McCartney’s infamous pot bust in Japan took the wind out of Wings at the dawn of the ‘80s. Laine took off to pursue a solo career. He just released a new single, “Meant to Be,” on vinyl and he has an album, “Valley of Dreams” on the way. In 2016, the University of Fredonia in New York state presented the United States premiere of Laine’s musical “Arctic Song,” which focuses on climate change and environmentalism.

[sujus-girl]

Disclaimer: This is just something I did for fun. It’s not an official profile or anything like that.

So, last time I did a guide to the older (for me) members of NCT 2018, and this time I’m back with the younger babies! Let’s start!

PART ONE TO MY NCT GUIDE! Members born from 1994-1998

Members

Wong Yukhei (Cantonese Name)/Huang Xuxi (Mandarin Name) (Lucas)

a whole meme

tbh i thought he was gonna be cool, chic, and shy when he was first introduced, but JOKES ON ME, he’s a hyperactive idiot

a part of nct u

the biggest hypeman, his description of ten and taeyong will go down in nct history as one of the biggest memes

is obsessed with nct dream, and recently got to perform with them in Dubai, and all of us lost our minds

a fake nctzen, smh, he didn’t even know doyoung’s real name

also didn’t know that jaemin’s nickname is nana, or that his family name is na

kinda resembles minho from shinee

this idiot forgot to sing at his AUDITION for SM, so he just modeled instead and got accepted WTF

half chinese and half thai and a whole visual

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Mark Lee

korean name is lee minhyung

from canada, and didn’t tell his friends in canada he was moving to korea, so they freaked out cause they didn’t know what happened to him

is in ALL THREE UNITS RIP

the big question of the fandom is: will mark lee ever get a break, and the answer is still unknown

he’s so cute and adorable that it’s hard to believe him and lucas were born in the same year

“no one wants to be a square”

flexible boy, can do the splits and i want to know HOW

“mark is absolutely fully capable”

kinda like the unofficial leader of dream

tom and jerry with donghyuk, and it’s usually donghyuk annoying mark as mark exhibiting the most patience i’ve ever witnessed in a human being

high school rapper “SING SANG SUNG” and “TAKE IT, TAKE IT”

pls protect at all costs

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Huang RenJun

his nationality is chinese, but his ethnicity is korean

he kinda acted as chenle’s translator in the beginning tbh, it was so cute

a part of dream

is obsessed with moomin, draws him all the time and even uses him in his signature

is a whole savage, refuses to let anyone live

“once jisung becomes an adult, we’re going to go to the roof and fight in the rain while wearing suits”

chenle, when lucas said his korean wasn’t good: “it’s good! even the older brothers say your korean is better than winwin’s!”

renjun, ready to demolish his group mate: “is that even a question! anyone with ears can tell that!”

also renjun, in that same vlive: makes jabs at kun’s age when lucas joked about being old

also ALSO renjun: reminds kun and chenle that isung can’t understand or speak mandarin, so they should speak in korean instead so he doesn’t feel left out

no one lets him live down the legendary voice crack

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Lee Jeno

i honestly just think jeno is such a precious child and i adore him

a part of dream

is said to resemble super junior’s donghae

he said that he wanted to become a singer because of super junior’s sorry sorry and that made me love him even more

jeno x nana, is that still a thing? i think it’s still a thing

a really good dancer

him and jisung danced to baby don’t stop for ten’s birthday and i think that it was just a really cute gift

apparently the only one that listened to doyoung when he took them out while they were all still trainees

he is allergic to cats?? BUT HIS FAMILY HAS CATS???

probably off somewhere messing with haechan

has a very pretty smile, and he probably knows it

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Lee Donghyuck (Haechan)

in charge of bringing up member’s cringe moments and not letting his members live peacefully

especially mark, i feel like mark is his main target

a part of 127 and dream

a master of girl group dances, but also can probably cover any popular dance

tbh, a pretty decent cook, he’s not as bad as some of the other members *coughcoughMARKcoughcough*

tried to give a spoiler for go during a vlive and the rest of the 00 line DEMOLISHED him

this bitch almost set the kitchen on fire smh, him and a few other members were cooking on vlive for this competition thing, and he accidentally held a tissue a little too close to the fire and kun had to put it out

some haters were trying to come after him for something stupid, and, honestly, it was complete bs and he does not deserve this disrespect

if you got a problem with my boy, you gotta get through ME first come AT ME

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Na Jaemin

has the cutest name, and it made me melt the first time i heard it

his nickname is nana, and i joke that jeno’s part in we young is dedicated to him

in nct dream

loves nctzens very much and we love him very much back

he had a back injury, so he sat out of activities for a LONG time

like, literally, he debuted in nct dream with chewing gum, then was inactive for my first and last and we young

he rejoined the group in 2018, and made a comeback with Go, and WE WERE NOT READY

HE LITERALLY WENT FROM CHEWING GUM TO GO AND IT WAS LIKE WHAT

kind of a brat and kind of a meme, but we love him anyways

deadass shoved haechan out of his way on the 00 vlive

he took charge when making desserts with the dreamies, and, no lie, i thought it was kinda cool that he was so serious about it

HAS COUPLE BRACELETS WITH RENJUN

I’M SOFT FOR NA JAEMIN, OKAY? PLEASE GIVE HIM LOTS OF LOVE

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Zhong Chenle

a whole cutie pie, jisung would agree with me

is chinese, if the name didn’t already tell you lol

SHANGHAI, AYYYY

a part of nct dream

there are videos of him predebut in china, like frfr baby chenle, and it’s so adorable

he’s been very talented in singing ever since he was super young, and tbh, he probably has more talent in one fingernail than i have in my entire body

likes to help renjun make fun of kun #prayforkun2018

his korean isn’t perfect yet, but it has improved a lot from debut! renjun used to help translate for him, and sm even gave him this cool translating device during the dreamies nct life

part dolphin apparently, has a very highpitch laugh and i live for it

is close with lucas too, and i just think it’s so adorable when they interact cause they’re just so comfortable with each other

is adored by his members, and you should adore him too, he’s a whole cutie pie

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

Park Jisung

jISunG PWARK

A WHOLE CUTIE, LOOK AT HIM

he kinda reminds me of a baby chick, is that just me? idk?

nct dream

he the baby of the babies, the youngest in nct

a really good dancer! back when sm rookies were still on mickey mouse club house, the other rookies pointed to him when super junior’s eunhyuk was looking for the best dancer

ALSO GOING TO BE A PART OF WHY NOT? THE DANCER WITH SHINEE’S TAEMIN, HIGHLIGHT’S KIKWANG, AND SUPER JUNIOR’S EUNHYUK, AND I AM READY TO SEE ALL MY PUPPIES TOGETHER

i don’t think he can cook, he just kinda stood around while the other members were cooking

mainly just ate the ingredients, he a growing boy

i think he’s like 5′10″ already, and i’m like?!?!?!?!?!!? AHHHHH???

kind of a clumsy kids, would not trust with anything delicate/expensive

should be supervised at all times tbh

Videos to Watch: (1) (2) (3)

WE FINALLY GOT THROUGH ALL THE MEMBERS! That was a trip!

Group Videos to Watch: NCT 2018 Weekly Idol (X) NCT 127 Weekly Idol (X) (X) China Line VLive (X) NCT Life In: Bangkok (X) Seoul (X) Paju (127) (X) Entertainment Retreat (Dreamies) (X) Cooking King (X) Chiang Mai (X) Osaka (127) (X) Kun X Dreamies Cooking VLive (X)

Y’all, there’s a lot of good NCT content out there, but I’m going to stop here, cause that’s hella time. Anyways! Thank you for reading this, and I hoped it help you or made you kinda laugh! Please support NCT and show all the members lots of love! Bye bye!

[typingdyslexiaisathing]

Cowboy Bebop ficlet

// Figured I would post an OLD ficlet I did way back when. This is done before Faye and Ed and Ein join up on the Bebop. With my OC for this verse. Read below if you want to enjoy some old school bounty hunters. //

I was pretty sure Spike knew I was watching him do his shirtless training of hot. So I just laid on the stairs to watch him with my head resting on my arms. Enjoying how he moved so fluidly as he punched and kicked at air. And I had my music on besides so it made such even more entrancing. I didn't have it on as loud as I tended to though. So I could hear him when he shot a question my way. "Don't you have something to do, Jo?" I shook my head to pop one of the earbuds out. So he knew I could hear him. "No. I got all the tinkering done a while ago. Jet is making more food too." Spike pauses in his routine with one leg up in the air. Turning his head to look at me. And God is it ever hot how he can stay all poised with a foot all the way up like that. So I just stared at him. And he gave a snort of a noise to look back out the window of the ship. "I get the feeling I'm being sized up for something. Or are you just enjoying me half clothed?" I really wish he hadn't asked. Since I was not one to lie to a team mate. Even if it made me blush. "Every person has a type, you dork. And you happen to be my type." Spike freezes after his punch to look very surprised. So I continue for his benefit. "Tall. Toned. Funny. Smooth talker. Skilled. If you didn't smoke so much I'd have tried to kiss you already." Spike whirls his head around to look at me with his eyes wide. And if he didn't look stunned I'd eat my sneakers. "Are you serious?! Jet told me you were- Geez Jo!" I chuckle as my toes curl a bit in my sneakers. "Center yourself, tadpole of the tai chi. I'm not gonna run over and jump your fine ass. I'm just gonna enjoy the view." Spike shakes his head to then run a hand through his hair. Looking very flustered as I watch his muscles flex. ***** Spike looked so dead serious I couldn't look away from him. Both his hands resting near my head as he cornered me against the wall. And his eyes stayed locked on mine. That one brown eye a lighter color than the other. And I was so captivated I could barely breathe. His words were so low I almost didn't catch them. "Why is it that even when I'm looking at the past, you keep filtering through my eyes? I've been dreaming the same dream for so long. Now it's changing. And it's unsettling on how it's making me forget things. Things I know I need to hold onto, yet they are things I have wanted to leave behind." Spike clenches his hands into fists as he keeps me there with his gaze. And I am wondering all sorts of things. But he just keeps talking like he didn't stop for a breath. "I'd think they sent you to keep tabs on me. But then you do things that make me think otherwise. How you don't ask me questions. How you keep putting yourself between me and whatever is trying to kill us. And how you keep watching over me when I fall asleep on the couch. You've had all the time in the universe to kill me if they had sent you. So tell me Joanna. Who are you really? Because I am not going to keep letting you close if I don't know where you fit into this waking dream." I give Spike a huff of irritation that notes my confusion. My own questions giving him a bit more inkling into my bafflement at his actions and his words. "Why do I have to be someone specific, Spike? Can't I just be myself?" Spike went so still I would think he was stone. But I keep going anyways. "The way you talk, it makes me think we're in some secret spy movie. Like the really old ones with double agents and super villains. And that makes me wonder about you for a change. I've been fine with just knowing you are good at karate and bad with bounty hunting. I've been totally okay with you and Jet and myself going from one day to the next just cruising around the solar system. I didn't need to know more than what you both told me. That Jet used to be a cop and that you used to be on Mars. The only thing that has ever mattered to me is if I can feel safe around you. Safe as in you won't throw me into a storage room and rip my clothes off. And you proved that I can relax and just be. You never asked me before about who I used to be. And even though I wonder why you're asking now, I will tell you." Spike nods to then relax a little. Using those arms he has braced against the wall to corral me more like he's just leaning. So he sighs a bit to then ask me his questions. "Who are you?" I sigh to cross my arms. Closing my eyes as I answer. "My full name is Margaret Joanna Adelha Mathilde." Spike blinks to then chuckle a little. "That is a mouthful. Hence why you just answer to Jo." I nod for him to ask the next question. "Are you really from Earth?" I nod again to add in, "The town I was born was called Saugatuck. It was in the state of Michigan in the United States of America. At least back then it was. I haven't checked to see if it is still there." Spike looks confused to then lean in to get in my face more. And his question is really quiet. "Care to explain that?" So I open my eyes to gaze into those brown eyes. And I shiver a little when I reply. "Here's the big plot twist. I was born in 1998. And got put into a freezer when there was a big accident on a space shuttle." Spike goes as wide eyed as possible. Looking very stunned as I sigh and lean my head back against the wall. "Mom and dad apparently had me put in cryogenic freeze after the doctors told them I was a goner. And since they were just testing those damn things out, there was a need for test subjects to see if they worked. So I got shoved into an ice tray. I woke up a few years ago after one of the hospital directors got replaced with some new hot shot senator. He decided saving all those poor helpless victims and rehabilitating them would be a genius political move or something. The end result is I got thawed out along with a dozen other people that had been on the shuttle. By the time the police got their noses into the senator's closet to see about skeletons, I was already on my way to a clinic on Mars. So they had no recourse but to let me go on my merry way when the project buckled. Left it so I didn't have to pay all those bills from the upkeep of my ice tray and the rehab. But it also left me without any help to start a new life." Spike frowns to then move away from the wall and give me my space back. His sigh clearly saying he gets the rest. "Hence why Jet got a call from his old friend who is still an active police officer. He was called in to pick you up from the clinic and keep tabs on you until they could build a case against the senator. And Jet got an extra pair of hands in the bargain. Someone who literally had nothing else to fall back on." I chuckle to roll my eyes at Spike. "We both know Jet isn't the type to leave some helpless gal who literally only has a hospital gown go it alone. He'd sooner light his bonsai on fire." Spike smirks for me to chuckle a bit. His hand reaching into his hair to rub at his head as I continue. "Jet made it clear that if I ever found a better option, I could take it and I would owe him nothing. But I honestly have never looked for anything else. Why would I? I have a home here, skills to build on as I figure out what has changed in the time I was on ice, and at least two people I call family." Spike stills to look at me with a questioning glance. So I wave a hand at him to make my point. "I did say I feel safe around you, Spike. I don't extend that kind of faith in anyone unless they have earned it. You may not trust me with whatever skeletons you keep in back storage. But I know you won't hurt me willingly or hang me out by a noose. Heck, you tend to cover me whenever something is gonna blow up. Figuratively and literally. Just like I do for you. Isn't that enough for you?" Spike spends a really long moment just staring at me. His eyes so focused I want to tell him to blink. But then he turns away to keep rubbing a hand to his head. And he sighs so hard I'd think he was going to deflate. "What a headache. No wonder you're so old fashioned." I snort to roll my eyes. But then Spike tells me something that has me go stock still. "I used to be deep in the Red Dragon Syndicate. And ever since they declared me killed that night, I only see the past or the present. Like a waking dream. My left eye only sees the past, the right eye only sees the present." Spike turns back around for me to have something in my head click into place. My shoulders tensing as I stay leaning against the wall. "Huh. So that's why your eyes are different. One of them is fake. Right?" Spike doesn't answer. Which is a confirmation in my book. So I give a long sigh all my own. "Guess that fits the theme of this rag tag group. Jet doesn't lead the life of a cop anymore. You don't lead the life of a syndicate member. And I don't have any life to go back to either. It's an in between for all three of us. Maybe we should rename this boat Limbo." Spike smiles at my pun even if it doesn't reach his eyes. Which has me rub at my arms a bit for him to walk back over. His hands coming to rest on my shoulders as I shiver again. "Guess you really are a super spy then. With fancy shooting and gadgets and Jeet Kun Doe. We should replace your tie with a bow tie or something." Spike gives a soft chuckle before I look up into those brown eyes. And we end up spending a moment just staring at each other. Until I ask him my last question. "Was it worth it? Leaving the monsters to chase a beautiful angel?" Spike goes so quiet I know he's holding his breath. So I remind him, "All the spy movies have some gorgeous lady in the plot. So it's not too much of a leap to think you left for a chance at being with a good woman." I reach up to place my fingertips to Spike's face and wait. My eyes tearing up as he takes a breath. And his answer is but a faded whisper. "She was worth it all and more. And will always be the dream I linger in the most." Having Spike say that sounds so fitting even if that answer hurts me. But I smile as those tears fall. Giving him a chuckle as he grips my shoulders a bit harder. And I say the one thing I didn't want to say. "Then keep dreaming, Spike. I wouldn't wake you from that for any reason. Keep dreaming that good dream for as long as you can." Spike nods before he pulls me in to hug me close. My hands lowering to rest at his heart as he all but crushes me. And his words are quiet but so full of strength. "You would have been just as worth it, Jo. A girl like you is worth more than you think. Demons and dragons tend to know only violence and struggle. They never know peace or hope for quieter days. And you remind me of such wants. Just like she did. It's why I felt so confused. Every time you remind me of what that felt like, I see her standing behind you. Like a mirage." I chuckle a bit to wrap my arms around his waist. Soaking in this contact even if his hug is cracking my ribs. "Maybe one day we will find her so you can make those old dreams come true. I would help you track her down if you want." ***** I gave a prayer that I knew I would regret once the dust had settled. But I gave it anyway before I opened my eyes. Then I centered the gun and took aim. And for once my mind went blank. No thought. No emotion. Just purpose. And it was all I needed to take that shot. So I pulled the trigger once my aim was sure. And the gun fired for the thug who had been strangling Jet to fall. The bullet punching a good hole through the center of his head for it to exit out the back in a shower of gore. Then I moved to aim at the guy charging at Spike with a very large sword. And I took aim to shoot again. The gun going off for the bullet to rip right through the thugs temple. The spray out the other end washing over the wall like speckling paint. Spike grabbed the now very dead sword guy to use him as a shield against the incoming bullets from the gunman up in the rafters. And I took aim at him next to fire. His neck soon half gone for him to fall over and writhe. I then heard the bullets sing around me when the second gunman decided to get rid of me. Jet shouting for me to take cover as I ducked down. But I wasn't going to just stop. My hand reaching for the grenade we brought that didn't work anymore. So I tossed it over to where the gunman was hiding. His yelp of fear soon leading to him jumping away from his hiding place. And I took aim and fired to punch a hole through his ugly sunglasses. The left side of them nothing but shrapnel as he went down in a heap. And I heard Spike's shouted warning a bit too late. The last goon having come up behind me to grab me by my hair and yank me backwards. I hissed in air to try and get free of the grip this goon had on my hair. Which ended with a very sharp dagger punching through my open palm. I gave a hard scream as the agony ripped into me. The goon grinning for Jet and Spike to get it in gear. So I took the gun and pointed it into the goon's mouth. His shout muffled for me to pull the trigger. And the boom going off so close to my ear left me in a bad state of total silence. Like Jet had put his hands over my ears. The blood and gore from my now dead assailant soon dribbling down my shoulder. And I was so done I just shoved the dead body away from me to then stumble away. Sliding down to crouch against the one wall and breathe. I didn't want to look down at my hand. I didn't want to feel the bits of blood that were sliding down my back from killing someone. And I sure couldn't hear anything other than a muted ringing. But then I felt someone grab me by my hair again. And I was so out of it I dropped the gun when I got yanked to my feet. The ringleader soon grinning at me to then tug me over and out into the open. His other arm coming around my neck to pin me in a headlock. And I was in too much of a daze to really process anything. I could finally start to hear Jet and Spike as they gave a few shouts at the ringleader. But he made his point by squeezing his hold on me. Cutting off my air for me to choke. So Spike went quiet even as Jet fumed more. But such was helping me get my bearings for every second that passed. And I was able to shake off the daze once the ringleader was in the middle of making his demands. So I went for broke and wrenched the dagger out of my hand. And stuck it right into his groin. Making him bellow as he let me go. So I scrambled away for Spike to take the shot. The ringleader falling down as Jet ran over to grab me. His arms keeping me from just falling flat on my face as he took my weight. And I felt so relieved once he did I went totally limp. Only now registering I had also gotten shot earlier. My left hip doing some serious complaining even as Jet moved us into a side hallway. I could tell Jet was really worried, since I was more of a rag doll than a conscious team mate. So I coughed and moaned for Jet to hear. Having him calm down a bit even as he looked my very bleeding hand over. His words as ever gruff and barked. "Now you know why I told you to stay on the ship, Jo. This isn't the place for rookies to be asking to get run the Hell over. Side note. You did fantastic. Now don't move your fingers on this hand. That poker was a big one." I stay completely still except to breathe. Jet ripping one of my pant legs off to make a bandage for my hand. While Spike finally walks over to check on us. His gun still up for him to look down at us. "All dead. With the data chip the ringleader had being slightly stained. But it looks undamaged and they never said we had to bring him in alive. How's Jo?" Jet gives a grunt to finish tying the bandage on my hand. "Either she's in shock or too tired to make a peep. Her left hand is very bad. And they shot her in the hip. Her ears are also bleeding slightly. In short, she's the most mangled of the three of us. Unless you got hit and I can't tell." Spike nods to hold up an arm. A long gash dripping ever so slightly. "Sword guy got a few swings in when he charged at me. Jo will have to sew my jacket when she has the time." Jet gives a huff of a laugh to then shake his head. "You expect her to sew that for you? Her left hand has a hole the size of a-" I give a loud cough that makes Jet stop mid sentence. And my words are very tired when Spike reaches over to place a hand to my head. "I don't wanna know..." ***** Sewing this jacket was taking quite a bit of time. Since my left hand was not cooperating at all. Which meant having to do everything one handed. But I was a very patient person by nature. I just took my time as I sat on the couch. Jet in the kitchen to make bell peppers and beef, with actual beef this time. Along with rice and mushrooms and several other vegetables. I had insisted we use my portion of the reward money to get some food for us. Jet and Spike not complaining when I said so. So here we were. On our way to Mars. Spike doing his Jeet Kun Do in front of me. Jet cooking us something to eat. While I sat and sewed with one hand. The television on for us to listen in on that corny bounty hunter channel. Both of the casters that hosted the show doing their usual greeting with the fake Texan accents. And Spike stopped after a bit to listen in when the announcers said they had big congratulations to give out. Jet poking his head out to hear as I stopped sewing to turn the volume up. The one guy smiling bright as he spoke. "It would seem that big fish we have had on our listings finally got himself caught! And none too soon it would seem! Reports from the police have confirmed this big fish was up to some mighty bad stuff!" The blonde gal confirming to point where they had a mug shot of said big fish up on our screen. "Too true! It turns out this big fish was going to vandalize a whole space port! Just blow the whole thing to smithereens! So it's a good thing he got caught!" The first announcer nods to add in, "Or in this case, killed. Apparently, three bounty hunters cornered him to do away with him and his whole gang. They sure put up a nasty fight though. However, we were told that the bad fish were the only casualties. And that all three bounty hunters are on the mend. Add in they got back the stolen data chip to hand it over to the police, and it was a good day all around." The blonde smiles brightly to then point where three more pictures are placed on screen. And both Jet and Spike go wide eyed when it is our pictures shown. Mine in the middle for the blonde to smile and continue the narrative. "These are our heroes of the day, y'all. The crew of the Bebop. Two veteran cowboys and even a cowgirl to boot! Just look at that pretty red headed gal!" The first announcer chuckles as Spike sits down next to me on the couch. And I can safely say we all are stunned as the narrative continues. "According to our sources, it was the cowgirl who was the sharp shooting ace on this fishing trip. A good old fashioned Annie Oakley. However, she did end up with several bad injuries that may be a bit of a rodeo to tackle. But we fellow cowboys will wish this crew good luck and safe trails. Next up on our broadcast is the latest top ten most wanted rascals. So stayed tuned as we break for a commercial." Jet walks out to start growling a bit in agitation. Spike looking very thoughtful as I mute the television. So all we hear is Jet. "I told them not to release our names to the media! Dammit all, now I'm gonna have to call them and give them a piece of my mind!" But I simply shrug a shoulder to go back to my sewing. Spike catching on to wave a hand in the air. "I don't think it hurts anyone, Jet. Especially when we get some positive praise for Jo out of it. And she deserves it in my book. I mean think about it. We were in over our heads with us going it just the two of us against all those thugs. And Jo realized that to cover our asses. And I believe that deserves some ten minutes of fame. And a dinner that isn't burned. So go make sure it doesn't and we can regroup as we eat." Jet gives a humph before he nods. His robotic hand soon patting me on the head in appreciation before he heads back into the kitchen. Leaving me with Spike as we sit on the couch. My fingers on my only working hand threading the needle through the material. But then Spike reaches over to place his hand over mine. Stopping me from continuing for me to look up at him. Neither one of us blinks as the moment lengthens. Until Spike gives me that rare warm smile that reaches his eyes. "Thank you, Joanna. I know you aren't the kind of person who can hurt people willingly. So thank you for the rescue. And I'm sorry it came to you having to kill so many people to accomplish that." I shiver all over as Spike laces his fingers into mine. His grip strong and grounding as he continues. "I never wanted for you to become like us. So used to the violence of our work that you don't think twice about pulling the trigger. It was why I didn't want to teach you my Jeet Kun Do. And I know Jet was even more opposed to you having to learn how to use a gun. We both are aware that in order for you to be safe it was needed to teach you all that. But Jet was Hell bent on never putting you in a position to need to. So I will apologize for doing so with that job. We never should have taken it to begin with. The pay off be damned. No amount of money is worth putting you through Hell. I'm sorry, Jo. For all of it." I take a moment before I say anything. My hand it Spike's tightening as I give a long sigh. "It is better I killed those men than let them kill us, Spike. You heard what they were planning. They would have blown up a whole space port. Hundred of people would have died. Fathers. Mothers. Daughters. Sons. All dead and floating among the debris. All because a few criminals decided those lives meant nothing. So I can say it was worth the pain and the guilt I'm going to suffer. Because it means that people got to live. Families can plan for futures instead of funerals. And that is a reward unto itself." Spike doesn't say anything as I shiver a little. Then Spike gently tugs me forwards to wrap his arms around me. Hugging me tight as I let the jacket fall to the floor. His hold on me as strong as steel. And I am so very glad for such. I all but collapse into his hold. So Spike shifts us so we're laying on the couch. Hugging me tight as tears roll down my face. Spike closing his own eyes as we lay there. And I take deep breaths against his front, just to savor his scent in my lungs. Every intake of air a mixture of sweat and cigarettes and the warmth of a living person soaking my senses. And I thank God for that. ***** I wasn't sure when it was I fell asleep sitting next to Jet by the helm. But I woke up in a different place entirely. Jet carrying me bridal style to the couch as he grumbled about something. And even though I was curious, I chose to stay quiet. Acting as if I was still out like a light. Which in itself was tempting to go back to. But then Jet set me down to place his hand to my head. And it was clear he was worried when he started talking at me. "Jo. Wake up. Hey. Joanna. Damn, you're burning up." I opened one eye to see Jet was frowning at me. And I figured that him using that particular frown meant something bad. So I gave a groan of noise to then close that eye again. "What? I was enjoying the nap. Seriously, Jet. What did you wake me up for?" Jet makes a grumbled noise to then move his hand from my head to my wrist. His fingers pressed into my pulse for me to note that such means very bad indeed. "Because you were shivering non stop while you were out. Yet you are roasting hot. Must've gotten an infection from one of those wounds." Jet takes his other hand to check over the wrap job on my hand with the hole through it. And sure enough, it bleeds the moment his robotic fingers brush against it. Making me hiss in air for his frown to deepen. Jet keeping his eyes to my hand as he grumbles more. "Yep. This opened up again. At this rate we may need to get you a new hand. Or one like mine." I can't say the idea of chopping my hand off for a replacement is a good one in my mind. But I take a moment to make him think I'm considering that option. "I'd rather keep what I got. Even if it doesn't work very well." Jet chuckles to shake his head. But he does still look worried. "Then to the clinic it is. I already adjusted course while you were out. Spike is getting you a change of clothes from your room. We'll be seeing a trusted doctor that has a brother on the police force. So I know he's trustworthy to not overcharge us." I give a nod for Jet to lace his arms under me. Lifting me up with ease as I lean my head to his shoulder. Spike at the door to have my duffel bag with him. "We just docked and have some guy asking for you. Says he's here to escort us to his brother's clinic.How is she?" Jet gives a huff of worry in answer. "Bad enough."