#also hilarious that it's with his dp clothes

[silvermeww]

ik there's been so much breaking news with the leak and i'm still thinking about whatever xy was on (re: SO MUCH) but this...

THIS TAKES THE CAKE

[hainethehero]

I absolutely LOVE that they gave Johnny Storm Cap's combat trousers and tactical/utility belt to wear with the F4 gear.

It could be a harmless little Easter egg. But it could also imply that there was a Cap variant with the Void gang at some point? And maybe he died because... yeah, supersoldier serum doesn't really match up well against Cassandra, and Johnny took his suit?

Or, the more hilarious/cute option, Johnny and Steve got together in the Void and reached "sharing clothes" status. Then one day, Steve goes out (maybe for cartography purposes because Steve's canonically very good at mapping out/reading terrain in a few seconds) and goes missing, which is how Johnny encounters Logan and Wade in DP&W.

I just love the way Steve haunts the narrative in post-Endgame MCU. Almost like the multiverse is trying to make up for the crappy, underwhelming ending they gave him after all he'd sacrificed.

[mareastrorum]

Useless WoW knowledge that I still remember, in no particular order:

A WoD trinket that shot out little eye beams to damage a mob was intended to function like a laser but had not been programmed to include a Z limit on the beam, so it was actually a laser wall despite a tiny visual indicator. This means that if I equipped it while in a multilevel dungeon, it would damage and aggro every single mob between me and the target on every level above and below me, and they would pull every mob between me and that aggroed mob on its way to me. That made the trinket especially efficient for farming lower level dungeons for transmog pieces once I knew where to stand and what mob to target so that the bosses and mobs would all come to me instead of needing to run an entire dungeon solo for a few cloth drops. To my knowledge, this was never fixed, even after 3 expansions, before I quit WoW.

Shadow priests were considered the red-headed step child of the DPS specializations because priests had two healing specs and only one damage spec. Class designers were explicitly hostile to the idea of making shadow competitive in any manner for years until the “bring the player not the class” mentality gained enough headway at Blizzard that shadow got some attention in Mists of Pandaria and Warlords of Draenor. This eventually resulted in shadow being the dominant DPS spec for almost all of Legion, thanks to an absolutely insane rework. Blizzard nerfed shadow in beta, in pre-patch, at release, and in every single patch for about 2 years. Other DPS classes didn’t catch up until the final Legion raid was released.

Until that time, priests were notoriously difficult to level because—despite that shadow was considered the questing spec—shadow did hilariously poor damage before max level gearing. It was only once LFG dungeons were introduced in Wrath of the Lich King that healers had reasonable methods of leveling, making it much easier to level a priest, resulting in a better representation of the class at max level.

I originally chose spriest because it was the only class with the ability to mind control another player character, and I frequently used it in PvP to walk people off of cliffs.

The “bring the player not the class” mentality was reversed because one of the lead designers who had always hated shadow eventually persuaded enough people back to his side that this was a terrible mistake. Shadow was heavily nerfed into the next two expansions, to the point that the Legion signature talent build (Surrender to Madness) was utterly useless in every context: raid, dungeon, PVP, and questing. The justification was that classes had lost their unique flavor, and by that we mean that this jackass couldn’t dominate as a Druid or Shaman caster dps anymore and one expansion of a shadow guildee showing him up was enough of that.

I’m not salty. >:(

The nature of shadow as a dps has always been that they do increased damage as a fight goes on. Burst DPS classes depended on timing cooldowns appropriately to average out to decent damage by the end. All DoT classes favor haste, which is a stat that reduced the timing between ticks of damage, and therefore consistently improved all DoT effects. DoT classes also needed consistent debuff and buff maintenance to remain competitive, requiring a play style of learning every fight ahead of time and planning accordingly. Every step was a moment they could not cast efficiently. In addition, shadow does more damage in execute phase, so the longer an execute phase takes, the better they are on the charts. Thus, for cutting edge raiding, when other raid members are not as adequately geared, shadow stands out even more, so for most groups, the next week’s fight will be shorter, and therefore less shadow damage. This meant shadow shined most in raids where they outgeared their raid group, leading to some chart manipulation by taking groups meant to optimize shadow dps.

In Cataclysm, an active buff was added to shadow that could stack to 5 by ticks (timed sequences) of Mind Flay, a channeled spell that acted as filler in the spriest rotation. The higher the stacks, the greater the damage output by damage over time spells on all targets, which was shadow’s bread and butter. In Mists of Pandaria and Warlords of Draenor, shadow was reworked to use shadow orbs, so rather than a buff, there was a separate resource indicator (like rogue combo points) that worked on the same 5 scale, without a timer for decay. Orbs could be consumed by some spells to increase damage output. Warlords further refined it so that the orbs could be consumed to temporarily buff spells that removed dots from the target and caused all the damage to hit at once, which led to a dps rotation called shadow weaving, which went back and forth between a dot and mind flay phase to a mind spike spam and mind blast nuke phase. Shadow needed to be versatile in optimizing for either dot, mind spike, or weaving according to a particular raid boss’s fight style, which resulted in me hoarding about 40 pieces of gear to be able to adjust my stats accordingly. Half my bag space was gear to switch my talents and stats as needed for mythic raiding.

My favorite thing to do in Warlords, during the year+ long content drought, was to go into LFR as a healer with my one tank guildee, order everyone else to switch to dps, and we would solo heal/tank the entire raid to carry the newbies. Because what is the point of having all that mythic gear and mythic mount drops and awesome transmog if you don’t get to show off?

In preparation for Legion, I farmed “the Insane” title, which meant earning exalted reputation in useless, outdated, hostile factions, as well as bringing a neutral faction down to hated and then back up to honored because it made pirates like me. I got a pirate hat for it. I never mogged it because it’s not like it was visible in shadow form anyway.

During the WoD drought, I played the auction house to earn enough gold (which could be traded for $ credit) to pay for play time and the next expansion. Sometimes I even bought not-pokemon pets that otherwise cost real money, still using gold. At the start of Legion, I spent approximately 500k gold on ore and gems to control the gem market in the auction house, which meant I controlled prices for the gems needed by competitive raiders. I made my gold back and then some, peaking at approximately 9 million. I used the gold to pay for the rest of my subscription time and each future expansion. In short, I played WoW for free.

In Legion, all of the classes and specializations underwent significant reworks. The core of the expansion was that every spec needed to acquire and upgrade an artifact weapon, and as the expansion progressed, they unlocked unique abilities that continuously improved output. Shadow’s weapon design was only meant to emphasize DoTs, putting an end to shadow weaving, and introduced insanity as a resource. Casting spells generated insanity, and at 75/90, you could enter void forms, which had a damage buff and continuously increasing haste. Void form persisted as long as insanity remained above 0, but insanity degeneration increased as time went on, meaning that it was a mathematical inevitability that void form would drop. In addition, the longer the void form, the better a lingering buff that increased haste and gradually decayed, ensuring that each progressive phase to return to void form was shorter as the fight went on. However, for shadow, the weapon benefits meant that crits begat summons which begat crits which began summons which begat crits, as infinitum—if you had the haste to trigger crits on your dots quickly enough to outpace the decay of the summon. The best spriests with high stats in optimal conditions could reliably maintain a void form for approximately 60-70 seconds, maybe a little longer if they got really good timing. (Guess which scrub outed themselves as only being able to do it for about 54 seconds and reworked the optimization around that timing? Yep, that same jackass.) However, that increased haste meant faster dots meant more crits meant more summons, exponentially increasing shadow damage as long as they remained in void form. Thus, no matter how much it was nerfed, this growth on growth on growth meant that shadow would always be competitive for damage so long as the priest was attentive enough to maximize insanity generation.

During all of Legion and almost all of Battle for Azeroth, haste was so insanely valuable for shadow that it was worth it to take lower level gear with less Intelligence (main casting stat) and other secondary stats as long as it had more haste. We gemmed for haste. We enchanted for haste. We used haste potions. Other classes had a haste cap, but we did not, even after hitting the GCD cap (meaning that the game would not register commands entered more frequently than the global cool down, which was every .5 second) for spell casts. That meant every spell I cast was “instant” in that I didn’t have to wait to cast my next spell. Shadow was the new enhancement shaman. It got to the point that the limit on shadow DPS improvement was the human limit for reaction time from visual and auditory stimulus—unless the player knew ahead of time what to cast based on their familiarity with the encounter, movement speed (for stuttering shifts across the battle field), and the pace of their haste pattern for that set of gear. Longtime shadow priests were already used to that play style because of the nature of dot spellcasting, so they stood out immediately upon implementation. I began memorizing fight rotations not in sets of X number of casts, but in songs I timed for a particular boss fight so that I knew when boss mechanics would line up appropriately to my numerous cooldowns and void forms. Since my raid team slightly improved with each week, I was able to adjust my plans by noting phase shifts as they moved up in the song. It turns out that music is an excellent method of timing 10-minute fight sequences.

Newbies asking about the haste cap became such a meme in the spriest discord that they added a command !hastecap to say “the only haste cap we need” with the following image:

One of the ways to extend void form was to trigger Dispersion (aka powder form, stopping all casting and reducing damage taken by X%—and also stopping insanity degeneration while it persists) at specific points in a fight to extend void form as long as possible. This was intended to be used as a defensive cool down, and every single raider instead used it as a dps cooldown, preferring the risk of death to giving up time in void form.

Surrender to Madness refers to a max level talent option in Legion and subsequent expansions. At certain levels, player characters gained access to talent options to specialize their abilities and buff certain play styles. One talent build might feature a selection to emphasize AOE damage, and a healer might choose a build that is optimized for big bursts of healing against a boss that lacks sustained damage output. For DPS specs, the max level talents are big damage boosts, and each option is suited for a particular kind of raid boss. StM was a unique talent: in exchange for being to cast while moving, there were no damage increases or stat improvements until shadow priests initiated StM, and the only difference was that it now significantly increased insanity generation and would kill the character if either (a) insanity hit 0 or (b) after 3 minutes. StM’s buff of casting while moving introduced a dramatic increase in shadow dps because it removed the discord between survival (being in the right spot at the right time) and doing damage. Further, the insanity generation offset the insanity degeneration of void form, with the intention that after triggering StM, the spriest triggers one final void form, does absurd levels of damage, then dies. The talent also imposed a debuff that prevented resurrection for 10 minutes or until a raid boss dies/is reset, eliminating any chance of a battle Rez. A skilled spriest with StM in optimal conditions would be able to extend their void form to just over 2 minutes. By the last 20 seconds, the insanity degeneration rate had grown to the point that the room for error between the time of casting and death was shorter than the GCD, meaning that every subsequent cast needed to be queued before the GCD without error to survive to that 2 minute mark.

The effect of StM was that shadow dominated the damage charts for first 4 raids of the expansion on almost every boss. It meant that for almost all bosses, the top 10 dps in the world for every boss kill was almost always all shadow priests. The spriests would do piddling damage for the first 6-9 minutes of a boss fight, barely above the healers, then trigger StM during the execute phase (when spriests do increased % damage thanks to another talent option), the raid would pop hero/lust (group haste buff) and they would rapidly top the dps charts within 30 seconds. Let me be clear: they made up the difference from the lowest to highest dps, which was millions of damage, in a fraction of the fight time, and they kept climbing until they died. An optimal spriest would trigger StM 2 minutes before the planned kill time, hoping to kill the boss immediately before/after the spriest dies to maximize damage output, with the knowledge that any Kill Time mods would actually report a longer time because they didn’t calculate StM reliably. Shadow theorycrafters spent an incredible amount of effort designing mods just to track insanity generation, secondary stats, and simulated damage for the purpose of figuring out the right timing to trigger StM and the final void form given the rest of the raid’s composition and throughput.

Blizzard couldn’t figure out how to fix this. They made spriests into raid bosses. Blizzard devs nerfed every stat, every ability, every buff, every talent, and shadow continued to dominate because the high end players sorted out how to maximize insanity generation for each raid boss for their raid group because there were only so many ways to design a fight to be challenging without crippling all dps specs. Too many classes now relied on longer damage phases to make any of them shorter than the minute used per void form. Too many dps used DoTs to introduce constant or recurring mechanics to remove debuffs. Too many casters couldn’t move while casting to introduce bosses where constant movement was required. Every challenge that could have been lobbed at shadow to trip them up would fuck up all of the other casters too.

Blizzard finally broke StM by reducing the insanity generation bonus to almost nothing, with no added gain or damage output. Then everyone switched to the void bolt build and nuked the shit out of people in pvp because oomkins weren’t all that hot and shamans were trash for pretty much all of Legion.

I’m not salty. >:(

Anyway, I leveled in Battle for Azeroth as disc in war (PvP) mode and got to murder the shit out of rogues attempting to gank me for being in healer spec, and it was satisfying enough to smite them to death, which is probably the least efficient and most hilariously inept method of murder ever other than stabbing them with my knife. Almost as fun as mind controlling players off of cliffs.

At my peak raiding schedule, I raided 4 hours a night for 4 nights a week. I spent a significant amount of time outside that farming gear and consumables, as well as doing PVP. We typically did 10pm to 2am because of work schedules.

Every shadow raider I grouped with quit the spec within 2 months and did something else. (Was there something to it that they were all guys and they couldn’t out-dps me? Probably.)

Also during legion, shadow’s artifact weapon was an eldritch being with a lovely voice stuck in a knife, and there were opportunities for her to trick you into getting insta-killed by gods for pissing them off. Doing each of these events earned you a hidden achievement (a feat of strength) until both the feat and the options were removed. Either someone thought “hmmm, maybe we should back off of repeatedly telling this specific set of players to kill themselves” or they thought “stop having fun you aren’t supposed to like it >:(“ and neither would surprise me. Let my knife wife indirectly murder me, I deserve it for listening to her.

Xal’atath’s VO did an incredible job to the point that this character had basically no lore and everyone in the spriest community still unanimously agreed she was Knaifu and could do all the wrong she wanted, as long as she kept talking while she did it. Of course we regularly committed suicide, that mean little laugh was worth it. And the DPS. Warlocks wish they had such an unhealthy relationship to power.

Knaifu is now a Big Bad in the most recent WoW expansion because of course we enabled her rise to power in her own right, how could we not? (I will not look up the new lore because I’m sure WoW writers did something incredibly dumb with it, and everything is better with rose void colored glasses.)

God, I miss Cascade. It is now removed, but it was a priest spell that healed in heal specs and did damage in shadow. I could reliably go into an Arathi Basin to hold the lumber mill, and when the last opponent realized it was time to flee, they’d use a goblin glider to go to blacksmith. Range limits on cascade only applied at casting, so if I threw a cascade at a fleeing target, it followed them until, it landed, and the range limit reapplied at the point of landing. Thus, I could cascade the flying enemy and it would follow them to blacksmith where it nuked the shit out of their team trying to hold the center of the map without me needing to leave my position at lumber mill, where I could call out enemy movements from the high ground. Also, I could mind control players off of the cliff.

They also broke goblin gliders in battlegrounds because guess which game designer didn’t like that other people were smart about using engineering items in PVP?

I might be a little salty. >:(

That said, removing the gliders provided fewer options for players to save themselves when I mind controlled them to walk off of cliffs.

Anyway, I rate WoW about 5/10, do not recommend.

[adultswim2021]

Delocated #1: “Pilot” | April 1, 2008 - 12:30AM | S01E01

I have to admit that I don’t really remember the lead-up to this series. It must’ve been reported somewhere, and I surely anticipated it. In this chronological watch-through for this blog, I’m mostly relying on records of what shows aired at what time, but as far as the ancillary things surrounding those shows (like how they were announced or promoted or audience reactions) I’m mostly relying on my own memories, if I have any. For this show I have a vague sense that I must’ve known about it beforehand. I posted on aspecialthing.com, where Jason Woliner also posted. He was the DP and editor of this episode. I have some inkling that I watched this episode knowing “a guy I know on a message board worked on this”. Oh yeah, this would’ve been post Human Giant. I don’t mean to damn anyone by giving their top credit as “associated with me online”. 

The comedy pedigree doesn’t stop there. In fact, I’m only leading with the guy I know because he’s the guy I know. Yet another case to be made for me doing a bad job writing this blog. But, please, read this anyway: Jon Glaser stars as “Jon”, a guy who’s in the witness relocation program. He was primarily known as being part of Late Night with Conan O’Brien, doing hilarious characters in sketches and comedy pieces. His personal bodyguard, Mike, is Kevin Dorff, and his boss at Copy City is Brian Kiley, both of whom are also from Conan. Eugene Mirman plays a guy from the Russian mafia. I can’t recall him ever being on Conan, but he’s definitely from the same New York comedy scene. He must’ve done a few things on there (UPDATE: He did stand-up on Conan; can’t find any evidence of him being a sketch player and I don’t feel like clicking page 2 of google to find out). 

I don’t recall if the show ever makes a point to fully lay out exactly what “Jon”’s involvement was in whatever mafia-related crime he witnessed, and I don’t think it really matters. What matters is that the Russian mafia wants him dead. He’s agreed to put himself and his family on camera because he’s also a buffoon who, like many other clout-chasing but unexceptional American dipshits, is absolutely enchanted with the idea of becoming famous. So the show-within-the-show exhibits a bit of tortured logic: put your anonymous witness and his family on camera for a reality series, BUT, outfit them with ski masks and micro titanium vocal harmonizers that have been surgically implanted onto their vocal cords so that they can’t be identified. 

The premise of the show is that he’s moving his family to New York City to live in a bitchin’ loft. He’s taking on a job at a copy shop, “mak-in’ cop-ees” as us 90s kids refer to it. When they get to their new accommodations, they find out it’s a crappy little studio apartment, basically a hotel room. Jon gets on the phone with the producers to yell at them and thoughtlessly refers to the fact that he didn’t put his family in murder’s way for a rinky-dink studio apartment. His wife is aghast after overhearing this cold display. The fact that she and their son have become pawns in his opportunism motivates her to leave him, taking their son “David” with her. Eventually “Jon” begins a dating, and we see a montage of disastrous dates. He quotes a crass Billy Joel lyric to Julie Klausner, a disgusting crime. I was literally so enraged that I said “ma’am, is this fella bothering you?” to my TV.

A central scene in the pilot is one where “Jon” is out clothes shopping and he spots Paul Rudd. As he’s complimenting him for his work, we hear a gun with a silencer go off. Apparently the assassin was trying to kill “Jon”, but they shoot Paul Rudd instead. This is a tragic occurrence, causing “Jon” to loudly mourn the entertainment world’s loss by weepily listing Paul Rudd’s credits as he lay lifeless in his arms. Mike eventually joins in. Though tragic, This is a key bonding moment for the two of them. Later we see Mike also quote a crass Billy Joel lyric to “Jon”, strengthening their bond further.

The final scene is we see Eugene Mirman talking on the phone, discussing his botched assassination attempt. He makes a dramatic proclamation vowing to kill “Jon” if it’s the last thing he does. He eventually questions how reality TV cameras got into his apartment. 

The pilot, in particular, plays with a lot of reality show tropes that are later dispensed with in the regular series. Talking-head confessionals and scene transitions with establishing-shot b-roll set to generic-sounding hip-hop beats are seen here, but not really seen afterwards. Jon Glaser notes this in the commentary. By the way, there’s DVD commentary on this episode. He also notes that the ski mask was, for the most part, mistakenly worn inside-out for this pilot, and if you really look closely at the seams you can tell that’s the case. 

He also notes that the Paul Rudd scene is actually taken directly from a demo they shot for the series. The demo is actually called “Relocated”, and is rather short, and doesn’t include “Jon” having a family. It also makes a point to mention that Eugene’s character is an alternative comic, who performs in Russian. The demo ends with “Jon” performing with Yo La Tengo, and we get to see him sing a few bars of “Sugar Cube”. Way to not cheap out, Adult Swim. 

Another thing to note is that there’s a doorman character in this who obviously has a fake mustache, which gets pointed out by “Jon”’s son “David”. This seems like a set-up for some kind of plot where we find out the doorman is a mole or something. This actor actually doesn’t come back for the series, and is replaced with Assy McGee’s own Larry Murphy. I forget how this thread plays out, but I’m pretty sure it’s just an ancillary bit of weirdness.

The thing about this show is that it’s in many ways a very typical Adult Swim show; it’s an intentionally stupid premise, and the writers could, if they felt like it, rest on their laurels and just be satisfied with the idea that the main joke of the show is that it exists at all and hope for the best. I’m talking about shows like Saul of the Mole Men, or Fat Guy Stuck in Internet. I feel like those shows sorta got away with something, even though time hasn’t been kind to either of those shows.

This show is so much better than that. In fact, the thing that strikes me about this show is that it has this uncanny ability to refresh itself and become something entirely different. The status quo on this show gets shaken up fairly frequently. Characters are killed off. Plot lines that could fuel material for an entire season are burned off in the span of a single episode. It’d be like if Twin Peaks solved Laura Palmer’s murder in episode 2 and somehow didn’t suffer for it. I haven’t watched it in a while, and I’m glad to have it in the mix.

EPHEMERA CORNER:

Superjail #2: “Superbar” (FINE CUT VERSION) | April 1, 2008 - 12:45AM | S01E01

Here’s another one I’m gonna save for later: Superjail’s first proper episode was presented in a mostly-finished state. I remember watching it and thinking it was great, though, for whatever that’s worth. I actually got a hold of a copy of the as-aired-on-April-Fools version of this, and the main thing I noticed is that it started off with a back title card that said “Waiting” on it for about 10 seconds, leading me to believe that this was some sort of internal Cartoon Network thing they were making fun of on Space Ghost. There’s also no theme song or credits; the opening has generic library music over it with a subtitle explaining that the real theme song hasn’t been cleared yet.

[cordria]

Fixing Mistakes - DP

Danny groaned and curled up in a ball, very suddenly awake. His head hurt, his leg sparkled sharp and painful, and he felt oddly sticky. “Ow, ow, ow, ow,” he hissed, a few swear words working their way through his teeth as he kicked his brain into trying to think through what was going on.

His eyes crept open, studying his surroundings. Dark. Quiet. Bars.

Bars?

His eyes opened just a touch more, turning his head. Bars on all sides. He was in a cage.

Memory flooded back into his brain - of the school bell ringing, of walking through the park with Sam, of cold rushing down his back, of an unfortunately successful ambush by the ghost world’s most annoying hunter. “Damn it, Skulker,” he whispered.

Having determined himself to be alone in the room full of cages, Danny sat up and slowly pushed fingers through his hair, searching for the source of the pain. It was from right over his left ear, a dull throbbing that was definitely sore, but no blood. Head trauma. Something that would heal with time, nothing to be done about it for now. 

He turned his attention to his leg, noting with a frown all the glowing blood smeared across the bottom of the cage. He poked and prodded at his leg, locating the worst of the damage: a huge slash down the side of his right leg. Almost as long as his fingers could spread, it was already mostly sealed over - thank Clockwork for not being knocked out until he was in ghost form. In human form, the blood loss would have killed him. 

The fact that a slash that big was almost sealed over made him wrinkle his nose. That had to have taken hours and hours. Perhaps overnight. He’d been out a long time.

He sighed. “I was having such a good day, too.” 

Although the cage wasn’t big enough to stand up in, he tried putting his foot on the ground and putting weight on his leg. Would he be able to stand once he’d gotten out of the cage? The pain sharpened, making him gasp and collapse. “Nope, nope, nope,” he whispered. “Ow, ow, ow, ow, don’t do that again.”

Blood started to ooze from the gash again. He’d broken open the scab. 

With a scowl, he pushed and pulled himself, maneuvering until he was leaning up against the door. From the fizzy feeling against his skin, knew they wouldn’t be something he could phase through. He’d have to find a different way out. He reached a hand out through the bars to pull at the padlock, studying it. It was the same type of padlock Skulker always used for locking his cages closed. The tiniest of smiles curled the corner of Danny’s lips. 

It wasn’t quite true that ghosts couldn’t learn. Skulker had learned new hunting techniques over the last eighteen months. Skulker had learned to keep Danny in human-proof cages. But ghosts learned so very slowly, and struggled with putting together facts they couldn’t see. Skulker knew Danny could get out of his cages - but, never having witnessed Danny perform the feat, couldn’t figure out how. And so he kept doing the same thing over and over.

Danny squirmed and moved around, digging a little box out of one of his pockets. Sam had gotten it for him for Christmas last year, along with lessons as to how to use it. Lock-picking was a skill Danny had assumed would be difficult, but it turned out to be hilariously easy, if a bit time consuming. Danny made sure he kept the kit with him.

It took longer than he’d hoped to open the lock. The pain from his leg kept distracting him and the hit he’d taken to his head was making it hard to focus. But he eventually placed all four of the tumblers, gave them a twist, and the lock fell open. 

He grinned, short and sharp, and worked the lock back through the rings on the cage, catching it before it could hit the ground. “Screw you, Skulker,” he whispered, pushing open the cage door and floating himself out, putting the lock into his pocket. He was careful to keep his leg from hitting the ground - even the smallest movements sent sharp shards into his mind. “I’m keeping this as a souvenir.”

Just before he was going to leave, Danny heard a sound from the corner. He tensed, instantly assuming Skulker had been hiding. The glow around Danny kicked up a notch with his anxiety, and he twisted around.

Nothing?

His hands came back down, letting the tenseness fade away. He floated forwards a few steps, noticing a cage far into the darkest corner of the room. There was the faintest glow coming from inside - it was almost like the afterglow of looking at a bright light for a moment too long. Too faint to be a ghost in any reasonable shape. “Hello?” he whispered.

“Mind if I borrow your lock pick set? I lost mine.”

Danny hesitated. The voice was very… human? And didn’t sound at all in pain or sick. The scratchy voice was also not bothering to whisper. “Who are you?” Danny asked, floating closer.

“I’m me, obviously.”

“Helpful,” Danny muttered, drawing up just close enough that if something were to lunge and reach through the cage, it wouldn’t be able to grab him. An odd scent tinged the air, making Danny’s nose wrinkle. He held up a hand, palm towards the thing in the cage, and upped the power flowing through his hand. The glow kicked up and, like a flashlight, illuminated the contents of the cage.

It was a human male, raising a hand to block his eyes from the glow. Red-orange hair raggedly pulled back into a ponytail and a beard that looked hacked short with a knife. Perhaps in his twenties, skinny and tall, and dressed in layers of rags. He had a cloak-looking blanket wrapped around him, and calloused feet wrapped in cloth that left his toes hanging out. Dried, reddish-colored flowers dangled everywhere from his clothes. Danny blinked at the man, startled. “You’re human.”

Teeth glittered as the man smiled - an easy, pleasant smile. At least two of the teeth were missing. “Mostly, anyways.” The scar-covered hand lowered. Eyes that were too bright and green to belong to a human peered at him, blinking against the light. “Lock picks? I’d like to get out of here before the hunter comes back.”

“Skulker’s annoying with his cages,” Danny agreed, lowering his hand and the light. His brain wasn’t working quite right. This… human?... was something like him? ...How? “What happened?” 

“I was just a tad too slow. Lock?”

Danny glanced over his shoulder, noted the still-quiet room, and settled his body gently back down at the ground. It took a moment for the world to stop spinning from the pain. Then he opened up the little box of picks and started to work on the lock. It was easier from this side, where he could see what he was doing.

“How did it come to be that a ghost knows how to pick a lock?” the human asked.

“This ghost gets hunted a lot. Not the first time I’ve seen the inside of Skulker’s cages,” Danny muttered. “Friend got me the lock pick set.”

“A human lock pit set.”

Danny hummed. “And how did it come to be a human in the ghost zone?” There was a soft click. He twisted and yanked the lock off.Danny floated back up in the air, fighting a wince of pain, and nodded. 

“Very long story. Too long for telling inside this lair.” The human pulled himself out of the cage, unwinding his long limbs and stretching upright. From this close, Danny could see the young man was incredibly lean and tall. Too thin. Too tall. Even though Danny was floating, the man’s head was on level with his. Something was off with this human, and it made the hairs on the back of Danny’s neck raise. 

This close, Danny could see the dried flowers hanging around his neck were blood blossoms. Before Danny could float backwards and out of the way, the man reached out and clapped Danny on the shoulder, still with that same easy grin. “Thank you for the rescue.”

“Do you…” Danny hesitated, thinking about the fact that the man was a human and they were on a floating island haunted by a hunting ghost, “need a lift? Like, to get somewhere?”

“Away from here would be nice.” The human’s smile faded just a bit. He was studying Danny. “I’m not a flyer. I’d appreciate a lift to… anywhere, really, that’s not right here.”

Danny held out his hand. “You got a name, human?”

The man grabbed his wrist, his fingers burning hot against Danny’s cold skin. “Flynn.”

The feel of the blood blossoms tingled down his arm, an interesting counterpoint to the drums beating against his brain and the stabbing pain in his leg. Danny lifted the human off the ground and took the shortcut through the window, back out into the glowing green of the ghost zone. “Nice to meet you, Flynn. I’m Danny.”

[kotalefanzu]

Pitch Pearl  ATUS AU- Part 3

ahahaha. i finally came back to wite the finale. WOOOO. im still sorry about waiting so long oof.

where we last left off, danny had a dream about phantom, in which he tells him about the creation of the natural portals. he leaves danny, saying that he’ll come running back soon enough. when he wakes up, jazz tells him that sam and tucker have gone missing.

danny takes a second to process that information along with the dream and his brain just shuts down. he goes on autopilot, acting like he didn’t hear a word she just said. jazz tries to snap him out of it to get some sort of reaction but when she actually looks him in the eyes, filled with exhaustion, fear, and helplessness, she realizes that he doesn’t need any more things to worry about and goes to tell their parents not to bother him. 

when she leaves, he blankly goes through the motions as he normally would. just like before this all happened. he checks his phone with slight hope that they may have tried to contact him, but after realizing he spent ten minutes just staring at it, he puts it away and doesn’t check it again. the walk to school is nothing but a stream of consciousness and he doesn’t even really feel awake anymore. everyone is just a blur while his brain refuses to process anything around him. 

he gets to class, looks at his friends’ desks, and notices two cleanly carved DP symbols on them. it makes him start giggling a little, then laughing loudly, before he sinks to the ground crying out of frustration and overload.

a town meeting is called in the middle of school. the missing children line up with the new influx of ghost sightings and they want to check to see if any more kids have gone missing. someone points out the danny got taken last and the two missing children were his friends. others bring up the lunchroom incident and start pestering him with questions, seeking answers. danny waits for his family to quiet everything down before explaining everything from his first day in captivity all the way to last night’s dream. many people want to push the blame onto danny for painting a target on their heads and force him to deal with it on his own while others want to use danny as a bargaining tool to save their lives.

the fentons reject every suggestion and say that the most important thing here to do if to protect the children and find a way to defeat the ghosts now that blocking their way into the human realm is no longer an option. they explain that giving danny up might be a trap if phantom was able to kidnap sam and tucker but didn’t head straight for danny. he is told to safe and not try anything.

the GIW are called in to work on locating one of the portals and storming the ghost zone to rescue the missing children. danny is desperate to help and spends most of his time reliving unwanted memories just to give any form of information that might be helpful. after a while they send him away to try getting back to normal life as he needs a form of distraction. 

at lunch, he is cornered by the other teens who ask if he is really just going to sit there and do nothing. danny is hesitant to lead more children into the ghost zone where they could be hurt, but they are determined and at this point, he is willing to risk it. after stealing a bunch of weapons from his parent's old weaponry vault, he finds a natural portal and opens it. they get sucked into it and arrive in the courtyards of phantom’s keep.

the ectoplasm flooding his system is mildly overwhelming but he pushes through it and begins guiding everyone to the dungeons where they would probably be kept. he notices while navigating that strangely everything is the same as it ws before he left, from to the decor to the guard rotations. when they reach the dungeons, sam and tucker aren’t there. it confuses him. he tries to think about where else phantom could have put them and a small voice whispers, ‘check your old wing’. its actually easier to sneak back to his old wing due to all the times he has snuck in and out of it. while the rest of the group aren’t so used to the routes, following him makes it a lot easier. waiting in the common room of the wing are sam and tucker, posed like lifeless dolls and dressed in clothing uncomfortably similar to what danny once wore, though less extravagant. their skin is pale and lifeless and their eyes are glowing

perched on their heads are silvery circlets. danny motions for the rest of the group to stand behind him. sam and tucker slowly turn to look at them and another battle breaks out.

its obvious from how they are fighting that while they wont strike to kill danny, they dont care about sparing the rest. the group slowly works out a system of one half distracting sam while the other go to hold down tucker and remove the circlet. as soon as it comes off, the glow from his eyes fades and he stills like they pushed his power button. with one less person constantly firing at them, its a lot easier to do the same for sam as she can’t fight them all off. dash and kwan take up carrying the limp, unconscious people and they make off with their battle spoils to the portal. 

danny reopens the portal and makes sure everyone gets through, doing a headcount. when he is sure everyone is accounted for and out of the ghost zone. he thanks them and seals it, locking them in the human realm with him on the other side.  

it takes a while for the group to finally tell someone what happened and they start fearing how to explain to the two dead to the world people who still haven’t woken up yet. they finally fess up when jazz drives by and asks where danny is. they silently just show her sam and tucker and watch the emotions flicker rapidly on he face. in the end she settles on heartache and gives a weak smile, telling them that she’s glad they are back but wishes they could have brought her brother back as well. she is more forgiving when they explain that it was his decision and they didnt have time to stop him before it was too late.

back in the ghost zone, danny stares blankly at the sealed portal, wondering if he should just step through now before its too late. just as he reaches out his hand, he gets pulled in a tight embrace as phantom laughs in his ear. 

“What did I tell you, Starlight. You would come running back into my arms soon enough. Let’s go back home. You’ll find I didn’t change anything when you left. We can go right back to how it used to be before. Like you never ran away from me.”

he stays huddled up in his room for most of the time, only coming out when phantom wants him to accompany him on an errand or when he has to attend meetings with phantom. the faces are familiar. he made a few friends during his captivity and while the circumstances are grim, its pleasant to see them again. 

for starters, clockwork was a common face when danny began getting incredibly homesick. phantom had requested danny be allowed to view the present of his ‘loved ones’ lives and he had spent every moment he could watching them throughout the day and making sure they were fine. clockwork also had hilariously awful puns, though they werent allowed to actually say them anymore after phantom got jealous and forbade them from speaking to danny. danny still carried the one-sided conversations and it seemed to cheer clockwork up from the decree. princess dora, now queen dora, was also a good friend of his, often discussing with him the pain of living with overbearing nobility. she had done a double-take when he approached her and sat him down to calmly ask what happened, though he could see the tension laced through her. after recounting she took a long sip of her tea and looked him in the eyes. she told a seemly random story of her exploring her kingdom and hearing a bard singing about how the mighty dragon princess stole the dragon king’s crown and the mighty dragon queen took her dear brother down. the piercing look in her eyes before she moved to a new topic told him more than enough.

the few moments of reprieve they offered was not enough to outdo the lappet treatment of phantom that allowed for no rejection, but it was something and it was all he could ask for.

sam and tucker wake up finally after being in a coma for two days. after scanning the room filled with their classmates, parents, and the fenton family, they quickly realize the only one not there that should be is danny. sam is the first one to speak, immediately yelling at them for trading them for danny and going off about how they need to go back for him as soon as possible. dash defends them by telling her that its not their fault danny closed the portal before any one of them could drag his skinny self sacrificing ass through it. they cant reopen it without him.

sam quiets down after that and tucker takes out asking all the questions he can think of to find a way to fix this. there has to be a way to reopen the portal.

(a cut back scene to danny interacting with phantom. im not good with writing abuse mixed with love very well so go ahead and use your imaginations okay uwu)

sam and tucker also end up secluding themselves and working nonstop on trying to figure out how to save danny. jazz stops by every day to check on them and pass on homework and anything she hears about the ghosts to them. while they start cleaning up the room to take a break and finish schoolwork, sam trips on a piece of paper and is about to fall. only she is caught in mid-air and surrounded by a neon lime green aura, one similar to danny’s though his is a bluish mint. the aura dissipates and she hits the ground with a soft thud but everything stops as tucker and her look at each other in shock. 

“That was you!”

“That was me!”

homework gets pushed aside again for experimentation and documenting. they might be able to reopen the portal after all.

[johnhmcintosh]

Programming the Planet

John McIntosh

 The planet and all that seems to be on and in it, are aspects of a Grand Dream, as is the entire universe - its a projection on the screen of Consciousness another name for the ONE SELF. What follows is a brief synopsis of the dreams [programs] ‘within’ this Grand Dream that have recently manifested, which will help humanity SHIFT into its first level of Awakening.

….……………………………………………………………………………………… 

When you buy a new computer it comes with a basic ‘operating system’ on/in which many applications/APPS [programs] can be added according to a desired outcome. This is much like the ‘innate’ and unseen operating system that handles thousands of functions per second in your body - PERFECTLY, unless interfered with by ‘added programs’.

 When the Real You [the slumbering God-SELF You Are] arrives in a ‘new’ body IT comes with baggage … a collection of unresolved programs called ‘conditioning’. This conditioning both designs the body you wear as well as the destiny you will experience [all of it]. New programs [‘conditioning’ made up of attachments, expectations and identifications tied to memory (past) and imagination (future)] are ‘added’ as this life experience unfolds, coloring every moment ‘of’ that experience.

 This NEW conditioning can be easily ‘programmed’ into your operating system ‘without’ your permission or awareness by those [there really are no others] who ‘know how’ and have their own agenda’s [usually suspicious at best]. This has been the way the Grand Dream has played out ever since the original thought/belief in ‘separation’ that brought the dream world/universe into manifestation. Most of humanity has been and continues to be manipulated in this way and is largely ‘completely unaware’ of it.

 In this last year of clock time [2020-21] a long standing ‘hidden and nefarious agenda’ has been increasingly exposed for all to witness. Some few saw it immediately, others joined gradually, but now hundreds of millions across the globe … ‘at the very least’ SUSPECT that there has been and is a grand-plan to control all of humanity through a concept called a One World Order. This plan is NOT benign in any way, rather it is insidious, calculated, self-centered and ultimately lethal for most of humanity since it includes the euthanization of most of the global population.

 This plan has been seeping into the collective consciousness of humanity for well over 100 years. The programming agenda included a ‘herding principle’ that corralled vast numbers of unaware people into and through ‘programming’ systems that literally ‘molded minds’ to follow a specific direction. Principal among these systems were advertising, entertainment, mainstream media and education whose constant and repetitive messages added whatever ‘program’ into people’s operating systems that fostered their cause.

 These systems first had to be taken over and then sculpted to fit the end objectives. To accomplish this, banking and finance had to be taken over completely and later authoritative systems such as law enforcement, intelligence, judiciary branches, politics and the countries they governed were added to eliminate any interference with plans that were being rolled out. The military was also key to the ultimate containment of a One World Order and for the most part, this was accomplished through the political systems they controlled.

 **The American military was and is the exception, which was and is still headed by Donald Trump - the Real President who was elected by the greatest landslide in the history of the USA. The evidence of this is overwhelming.**

 In 2016 this nefarious organization of elites referred to as the ‘deep state’ were ready to complete the ‘mass-programming’ of humanity when they miscalculated their rigging of that years American election with their choice for President [Hilary Clinton] being beaten by Donald Trump. That instigated a massive attack on the new and unforeseen adversarial administration using every means at their disposal from fraud, bribery, assassination attempts, impeachment, a smear campaign by the mainstream media that was unprecedented and finally a ‘beefed-up’ and highly coordinated election rigging scheme that soon became patently obvious to anyone paying attention.

 This time the elaborate scheme was openly exposed as fraudulent but the evidence was ignored by the judiciary system and mainstream media who were and are both owned by this deep state organization. What they did not foresee was the ingenuity of the Trump administration’s foresight and resolve to eradicate the deep state from their usurped position as world-controllers.

 The Trump Team allowed the ‘scam’ to play out and the puppet-president chosen to preside over the government after the stolen election, was illegally inaugurated in a ‘stage performance’, which could plainly be seen to be ‘prerecorded’ in several sessions with clothing switches by key participants showing up everywhere from moment to moment. The military turned their backs on the fake president and the Pentagon refused him entry into their building or access to critical military information. Trump retained the nuclear briefcase and AF1 leaving the puppet-president to fly transport planes, hire his own security and operate from a stage-set-oval-office as the While House was/is off limits to him.

 Meanwhile, the puppet-president signed a blizzard of “executive orders” that are attempting to overturn for the deep state, the enormous accomplishments of the first 4 years of Trump’s administration [largely unknown by the world since the mainstream media did not report any of them]. As the countdown-clock ticks by, behind the scenes the military, which is the real power temporarily in charge of the country, executes its meticulous plans to ‘take-down’ the deep state, not just in America but globally. There are tens of thousands of arrests occurring as this rolls out, many of them household names known to all.

 All this and much much more is part of the dawn of an Age of Peace and Light that begins with the Mass Awakening of humanity to the elaborate fantasy they have been living. But this is only the ‘first level’ of Awakening and will simply replace a very dark dream with a ‘happier’ dream. There are much deeper levels of Awakening still to come but the ‘question’ will now remain in most minds: “In what other ways might I have been fooled about reality?” … and that will lead many ‘inward’ where Truth is found.

 AMAZON #1 New Release(s) in 45-Minute Self-Help Short Reads - by John McIntosh

 “MASS AWAKENING - What’s Really Happening - 2020 - 30 minute Synopsis” https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08M62X743

 “THE GREAT SHIFT ‘explained”- The World You Have Known Is Collapsing. Here Is Why It’s a GIFT  https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08795Y7MT

[dramaplustautology]

Artemy and Nikolai Dragomirov

Some really messy notes from chats

The Dragomirov brothers, Artemy the older and Nikolai the younger, come from an intensely religious family that were amiable enough to their brood and cloth, but violent towards outsiders and other factions/interpretations of their faith. Not actually nobles themselves, they became rich through warmongering and pillaging in the name of their faith.

All of the blood thirsty, conquering tendencies funneled into Artemy, who has a deep sense of devotion to the church, and shame towards his ‘sinful’ urges. On the other hand, the baby faced Nikolai doesn’t feel much of a connection towards his family’s faith and is mostly in it for the perks of being rich. He’s got a smart mouth but would rather use it to chase cute nuns and alter boys.

Normally, their practices would alienate them from the rest of the church cause pillaging and taking prisoners for hard labour are bad no matter the reasons.

But they were in the right place at the right time when conflicts between countries intensified. The Dragomirovs were needed for the survival of their faith and the collection of kingdoms linked by it. As their victories grew, they were heralded as heroes by their church and lords.

Fearing that the flow of invaders would never end, the church decided to permanently keep the Dragomirovs as guardians. The archbishops came together and did a ritual sacrifice of a powerful demon/fallen angel to make the family extremely powerful (mega hornie) vampires.

This is kind of taking from when the middle ages catholic church said you could buy your way to heaven as long as you paid them enough, and did enough things in the name of the church. Then, you can pretty much drink wine out of duck pussy and still be guaranteed past the pearly gates.

As a reward for their deeds, and the feat of slaying that demon, they became immortal fanged monsters that could indulge in their bloodlust and regular lust as much as they wanted. Halos appeared around their pupils, glowing as a sign of their divinity, and their bites were addictive, forcing victims into complete loyal servitude. They are allowed to walk in daylight, and church relics can’t hurt them.

They’re weak to demonic things or people, though that’s relative to skill. Being demonic means having a chance at hurting them but their main profession is killing demons. They could be overpowered but there aren’t any countries or armies left to pose that much of a threat.

Despite being a kind of vampire, the family hates ‘evil’ vampires, and indiscriminately hunt them and other supernatural creatures. Witches and warlocks also get the torch, though that’s more of a formality since the family drinks them dry anyways.

That being said, the dragomirov’s own beneficiaries started to fear them cause they would go around turning people into their vampiric servants or gather a huge harem. That was mostly nikolai but Artemy periodically snaps and indulges in vice harder than his brother does.

It got worse after Artemy got antsy that conflicts were dying down, he wanted to do counter-invasions against the wishes of his parents. Keeping the borders strong was their priority, but Artemy’s bloodthirst was out of control. He killed them and went on to lead war campaigns that would soon earn him the title Warlord Saint. Countries he’s lead his armies through were know to burn for months, turning the sky gray with smoke, and turning the sun a ghastly red.

Nikolai, jealous little bastard, started getting jealous of all of Artemy’s fame. People feared him as much as they wanted to fuck him ajkgdldgds. The members of the church saw this growing  resentment as an  opportunity to end the chaos by supporting nikolai in his bid for power.

Getting the better of Artemy, nikolai defeated him in a duel but still cared about him enough to want to keep him alive. So artemy was pinned to the inside of a coffin with a sharpened demon’s rib. Nikolai had slashed his face during the duel, and the claw marks will never stop bleeding, which flows out of the locked coffin which got stuck under the alter of the family’s church building.

So, Nikolai didn’t go pillaging anymore or starting fights, but he went ham on his own brood and anyone that happened to wander into his territory. Became known as the Grand Hedonist by sticking his dicc in every priest and nun, indulged in the church’s riches which in turn cursed all of that shit.

The Kingdoms turned into a circus, with so much blood and nut spilling into the ground that it spoiled the soil and spread a horrible plague. What remained of the church members that  gave the dragomirov’s their power couldn’t ask for help from their lord because the family had served him so well. They had to instead turn to the king of lies downstairs to seal Nikolai and his followers in his  estate to be swallowed by the earth. All of this in exchange for forsaking their faith and becoming new demon lords.

That’s it, and peace gradually came back after much sacrifice but the next time conflict breaks out and  fresh blood is spilled on their  ancestral homeland, the brothers are prophesized  to break  out of their prison and spread their curse anew.

Side notes:

Dragomirov isn’t the last name of their parents. Their dad was named dragomirov and had a big ego so he gave his sons this surname. Drago means ‘precious’ and mir means ‘peace’ which is some added irony.

Artemy is very devout, all about following the good word to the T, and sacrificing every bit of himself for it. but can't stop himself from getting violence boners and will get randy while he’s in his nasty blood soaked armor, but is likely to break his partners bones when he gets out of control

Tho he denies it, Artemy has a taste for people with  green eyes and will make a beeline for them. Like, skips over entire areas cause he heard of someone with pretty green eyes. it's cause his combat teacher had green eyes but otherwise he likes gentle people cause even tho his parents were very strict, his teacher was fair and had a soft spot for him

Nikolai loves the polar opposite; fighters and people that take work to break down. Can’t keep his hands to himself when it comes to scars cause they tell him that he's got a fighter in a cage

Artemy uses his mind control powers a lot but Nikolai prefers not to cause he likes chasing and watching his prisoners try to escape

opposites going on where Artemy tries to be intense but gets very baby with his S/O, snuggling up to them and clinging to them even tho he's much bigger and bulkier. and Nikolai pretends to be a good boy on the clingy side but will bite down to make people do his bidding

The brothers both keep momentos/trophies from vampires or other creatures they’ve slain. Fangs, horns, and claws are stuff that Artemy likes to keep and wear for intimidation factor, but nikolai likes wet stuff which includes eyes, tongues, and organs for aesthetic decoration.

Nikolai loves keeping werewolves as pet dogsbut like, he'll fuck em too. his werewolves are trying to bite him through their mesh muzzles but he laughs and says that they're actually kissing him

usually, the brothers both zero in on the same person even if they’re jelly of each other but they'll DP if they're too horny to fight each other.

Artemy is covered in battle scars and in most settings, covers his face in bandages or a mask (with his eyes uncovered) to keep his permanently bleeding face gashes from getting everything wet all the time.

Nikolai doesn’t throw himself into harrowing fights as much as his brothers so he doesn’t have as many scars, but loves piercings. His parents didn’t tho so he couldn’t get face piercings or even ear piercings. Even after they had died, the compulsion still stuck. Instead he has tons of body piercings and is very proud of the ones on his dick.

Artemy is more of a classical gothic romantic where he takes his  S/O to hilariously emo poetic dates, like picnics at the cemetery. Nikolai can barely stand wearing a tie the proper way and would rather eat pussy under a truck.

The brothers’ fangs are so sharp that it even cuts up their own mouths, and their partners’ tongues when they make out. Specifically Nikolai’s fangs are slightly too big for his mouth so they stick out a bit and make his lip bleed when he’s not careful

[linoholic]

poly!JJP

Requested:

Pairing: Got7 Park Jinyoung x Im Jaebum x gender neutral Reader

Genre: poly!au, normal/idolverse

Warnings: sexual themes, but nothing explicit

I must admit a lot of inspiration came from the Tomorrow Today music video. Also, sorry for the long wait 😬 first my laptop broke, then last night the radiator in my room broke and water was everywhere, even leaking down to the living room, and both my parents are out so I am the only adult in the house and have to sort it out with the plumber etc.

anyways

onto the au

get ready to be a parent to 5 kids

because if your dating the mum and dad of got7 that is what you automatically are

and you have been dating Jinyoung and JB since the ‘Bounce’ days

you were one of the lighting assistants working on the teaser photo shoot

during which you got to know them, as you were one of the few people actually close to their age

you quickly became closer to them both; and soon enough feelings started popping up

both of the boys gained crushes on you, and started competing for your affection, turning it into a competition of sorts

until it started affecting their relationship as JJP, at which point they sat down with each other and had a long chat

which……somehow ended up with them making out

yeah,,,they don’t know how it happened either

turns out as well as liking you, they both lowkey liked each other as a bit more than just friends

the next day, after this, 'revelation’ they approach you together

and it’s a little intimidating

both of them had their serious faces on, and they had cornered you at your apartment, so that you couldn’t avoid the conversation and run away like they thought you might

as it was though, they needn’t have worried as you had a feeling of what they wanted to talk about

I mean, they hadn’t exactly been discreet about the crushes they had on you, and being close to them had made you aware of this,,,'sexual tension’,,,between them

so it wasn’t exactly a surprise when five minutes after they approached you, you were all making out (during which Jinyoung comments “déjà vu” which leads to them explaining everything)

from that point on you three are officially together

you are their biggest supporter while they are JJ Project

and then when Got7 becomes a thing you hype them up during practices, and are their shoulder to lean on during the harder moments

you have also known the other boys from the start, and they have known about you

because despite how JB and Jinyoung are pretty private people, they love you to pieces and will talk about you forever if asked

and while you do become a sort of third parent to the boys, you are the first to join them when one of your boyfriends is getting teased

especially with Yugyeom

you team up and become JJPs biggest fans and annoyances

and when they have their 'Tomorrow, Today’ comeback, it gets even worse so they resort to shutting you up with kisses

(only you, Yuggie just gets hit)

the boys also tend to use you as a shield if Jinyoung or JB are annoyed at them or something, as you are good at distracting and calming them down

just as often as you can be found teasing your boyfriends, you can also been seen in the backgrounds judging Mark and the younger kids with them

you three know each other so well that talking isn’t needed between you

you just share a look and know what the other is thinking

it just so happens that usually those thoughts are “these people are weird”

(oh darlings, have you ever seen yourselves? you are just as weird. Just look at that one Just Right dp)

as you have probably noticed, kissing is mentioned a bit

and that is because our boys love it

I mean, when they have kissing punishments, have you seen how unabashedly Jinyoung carries them out?

also, his lips are perfect for kissing and he knows it, so he is often the one to make advances

not that youn or Jaebum mind,,who would?

and if it happens in front of the boys, any teasing is quickly shut up, either by bribing or scaring, it usually depends on the mood

cuddling doesn’t happen much in the relationship, but hugs do

Jaebum loves to give backhugs, wrapping his arms around you as you brushing your teeth in the morning after they spend the night during days off; or curling his arms around Jinyoungs waist as they rest during practice

Jinyoung can often be found laying down on his phone or reading with you or JB tucked under his shoulder or using him as a pillow

which happens a lot when they are at your place during time off

they basically live at your place by now, only still really living at the dorms for convenience, and because they don’t trust the boys on their own long term without someone dying quite yet

both of them have their own styles, and so you have a lot of fun raiding their closets for different outfits, stealing Jinyoungs button ups and Jaebums oversized t-shirts

and though they may complain they really don’t mind as much as they make it seem, because seeing you in their clothes is actually a little bit of a turn on

dates are usually just time alone indoors, as they will take any chance to relax from their busy schedules, and neither of them are particularly outgoing or energetic

sometimes you will watch a movie and eat takeaway

other times you do board games or complete jigsaw puzzles together

there are even times when you are just content with each others presence, not talking and reading your own books, with just the random giggles from reading a funny line, which never ceases to bring a soft smile to the faces of the other two

you do get out of the house for dates though

usually to a restaurant or Hongdae for street food

you and Jinyoung love it when JB gets drunk, as he gets so silly and it is hilarious, and also a good source of blackmail material which Jinyoung hoards, never knowing when he will need to use it against the leader

so when you do go out on dates, chicken and beer or Korean barbeque with soju all around are usually on the itinerary

matching couple items aren’t really a thing between you

but you do all have the same ring 

which sends fan and shippers into a craze when they spot the boys wearing them (you being out of the medias eyes of course)

and you all have a picture of the three of you together as you phone backgrounds

it’s of you three huddled together in front of the Han River at sunset, taken by Jackson, during a night where ot7+1 went to the riverside for fried chicken after a gruelling practice

speaking of which, you often attend their practices which food and drinks in tow, and a positive attitude

because being with JJP for so long means you are very aware of what an idols life is like, all the ups and downs, because you have been there for your boys through every single one

so when you turn up to the JYP building (where you easily get in because everyone knows you by now) you often take on the leadership role, allowing Jaebum to take a break and just be one of the boys, even if for only 10 minutes

and they love you so much for doing things like this

because you allow them to be normal men in their twenties

with you they can just be,,,instead of having to show the best side of themselves constantly

so of course, they make sure to give you their everything, and try to do as much for you as you do for them

whenever you have work but they have days off they can be found at your place, cleaning and making food for when you return

though they often get distracted by each other, because being in an empty house, alone, with no distractions in the form of schedules or other men, is very tempting

so it isn’t unusual to return from work only to find them,,,busy,,,with each other

and when they notice you are there, all attention is turned to you

let’s just say they know how to get you to relax

basically, you three have a very calm and mature relationship, and might as well be married the way you act

because look at you being cute and domestic with JBs cats and five kids

and actual peace and quiet for once

Definitely not my best or longest thing I have written, but my mind is all over the place right now and I needed to get something out.

Requests are open!

[deedgy]

take too long to post untill 30 days so here i come, taking all the challenges

DAY 1:

independent, tough, potty mouth

DAY 2:

me time, being with my family, being with my friends, being content with everything, when i inspire someone

DAY 3:

i and my staffs joking around about physical distancing

DAY 4:

LBJ, i have paid the DP yadaaa, wondering when this pandemy will be over huuh

DAY 5:

from my mom's WA dp

DAY 6:

yuuup that's meh!

DAY 7:

so maaaanyyy, it's like asking a favourite child to a mother, well let's pick end game because duh im a marvell team

DAY 8:

the power of music is great! adele is my queen! she can break my heart from the boy in my imagination

DAY 9:

happiness comes from our heart, it's not from your money your position or even someone else. Happiness is when you are fully content of what you have now

DAY 10:

not many, these are the list of my future bridesmaids: cempaka, sadwi, sarah, zeli, naran, dudu, and for the boys maybe i can think Buyung, Fandy, and Ridwan

DAY 11:

just regular siblings, my older brother, Mas Bhram, living his settled life in Tangsel, my older sisters: Winny and Finny, we argue a lot and gossip a lot!

DAY 12:

FRIENDS you havent lived if you havent watched it!

DAY 13:

sooo many! again like asking a favourite child to a mother, but let's say aroma karsa by Dee

DAY 14:

girly, casual with a twist, sometimes edgy

DAY 15:

to beautiful beaches in Indonesia

DAY 16:

my friends! damn corona sucks!

DAY 17:

deep conversation of course

DAY 18:

30?! omg sooo many okay lets try

1) i dont like my name, too long, too many consonants, spelling is too hard

2) cotton ink is my fave clothing brand

3) in the middle of a traumatic state of not dare enough to dream big

4) have my current cellphone since 2016

5) culinary is also my world, not really good at cooking but have a great palate

6) love seeing bridal world, really curious to learn about the culture from Sabang to Merauke

7) as bad as Indonesia can be, i dont want to live abroad, i love the weather and the food here

8) i want to have a bookshelf

9) got a bad accident in the fly over in 2018

10) i am currently learning arabic, damn this language is so hard!

11) after LBJ, i think im going to visit Banyuwangi ive just known that Banyuwangi has an airport haha

12) want to try a cruise holiday

13) have a promise with Sarah to visit Japan

14) have a culinary list in JKT and BDG in my phone, and also a holiday list

15) love teaching, currently have two students, aliy and rania, they both are great. teaching opens my eyes wider about the education world and somehow i have a little interest there

16) desperately in need of a job

17) kate spade purse and marc jacobs watch are my first splurge things

18) currently re-watching old hilarious disney series, like suite life of zack and cody, thats so raven, hannah montana

19) never like sports

20) my first date is a movie date

21) trying to highlight the beautiful verses in Quran, inspired by dian sastro

22) follow alice norin since the first day of signing in to instagram

23) cant sleep with lights on except if im very exhausted

24) an extrovert but love a me time, especially when i do the shopping

25) stay at home period makes me love cats

26) never use the same make up or skincare product because i like exploring

27) Solo is the best place to have a culinary holiday

28) there is one month when i worked my ass off i worked for 12 hours/day for almost every single day and after that they say i couldnt take my annual life, oooh yeaah boo you!

29) i remember that time when i became the "step daughter" in the office and i proved them wrong

30) very up to date! im all ears when it comes to talking, you can hit me up on my dm or any media, feel free!

DAY 19:

a fair-skinned guy in my kindergarten, monkey love is also a love right? i dont know haha

DAY 20:

Rio Dewanto, Nicholas Saputra, Vino G Bastian, Ryan Reinolds, soo manyyy

DAY 21:

Love is a strong word, it can not be wasted away for a wrong person. Be careful!

DAY 22:

today i got a death nap, gosh i dont feel fresh at all, i should get a job, pleaseee god

DAY 23:

Dear Future Me,

Youre doing great for deciding any decisions in your life. Thank you so much for surviving this far. I know that ure an independent tough girl. Are you in the best version of yourself right now? if not, it's totally okay. Keep going! better days are coming! always be grateful of what you have and yolo! you know the two meanings of yolo haha!

lol,

past yourself

DAY 24:

no matter how close your passion to your job is, working is working! it's not always rainbows and butterflies and it's not always thunderstorm too, so you gotta handle it! find the meaning from your job! take a deep breath and conquer the world! if you are tired, take a break, dont quit! result never betray effort! god bless you all!

DAY 25:

my kitten, Dulur! shes been adopted

DAY 26:

it was SD Priangan back then in 2001-2007, small school but really powerful, so glad to be alumni of this school

DAY 27:

my former area manager, Kak Meiliya, i really look up to her on becoming a business leader, she's such a lady boss, an alpha woman, very inspiring!

DAY 28:

loving someone can make your days brighter and also can make your days gloomier, be careful on choosing people you give energy to

DAY 29:

have a mon-fri 9-6 job, have time to pray, being healthy, can save some money

DAY 30:

i feel dizzy maybe because of the death nap, have a nice day everyone!

[magicmenageriestuff]

3am Eternal (Live at the S.S.L.) – The K.L.F.

( The Ancients of Mu Mu )

*

Alien 3  –  Paranoia In Pinewood part 2

The six stages of Film Production : as seen carved into the wall in Pinewood, Studio Five, by someone presumably better-versed in the industry than I :

Wild enthusiasm

Disillusionment

Panic

Search For The Guilty

Punish The Innocent

Reward The Non-Involved 

The above quote from the diary I kept in 1991 while filming Alien 3 in Pinewood Studios.  I released it into the atmosphere as My Pop Life #171 – Praying For Time.  I think it’s time for part 2, don’t you?

*

Somebody send me a clean version of this picture.  thanks.

Things settled down a little after the heart-thumping and deeply paranoid first month recorded in the previous episode.  No one was sacked.  I don’t think.  No one was re-cast.  There was a terrible accident one day when Sigourney’s make-up lady Linda was standing in a doorway on set – one of those science fiction doorways with a sliding panel which goes up and down with a swish.  It was a wooden contraption with a weighted pulley which failed, and it came down suddenly onto her face, right onto her nose. I wasn’t there but it was a nasty accident and she was rushed to hospital.  We never saw Linda again. Later I learned that she didn’t want to claim the medical expenses from the company, but having had a facial reconstruction and various operations I think that she eventually did settle.  Dangerous places film sets.

The cast of Alien 3 with David Fincher on set, 1991

My relationship with Sigourney had subsided into a kind of sulk, and although she would make the odd remark, the earlier fire and brimstone had calmed down a bit.  Not that we’d made up at all.  Sadly we weren’t friends.  I’d confided in other cast members – Niall Buggy thought I was completely bonkers “What are you talking about Ralph, she’s lovely!”  Pete Postlethwaite and Phil Davis felt the same way.  Dhobi Oparei too.  I was happy that they were enjoying working with her, but just as I started feeling cornered, there was Charles Dance asking me how it was all going as we waited for a set-up.  I think I was tentative at first but eventually told him what had been going on.  He confessed that he’d had the same kind of experience. “Is that how you’re going to say it?” and all of the paranoia about how clean he looked, other competitive nonsense.  I felt relieved that I wasn’t going totally mad.  It was only people she had scenes with where the behaviour occurred.  Wait – was Charles Dutton also having this relationship with her?  No.  He was a friend already and he was not the enemy.  Charlie and I have been firm friends ever since.

Charles Dance as Clemens

One day on set Sigourney and I had a scene on a balcony, after the fire. Men had died.  The Alien was trapped, locked in a loading bay. Dutton and his men were praying below us.  The scene wasn’t going well.  But we got it at around 8.00pm and Fincher pulled me aside.  “Dude.  She vampired that scene. Don’t worry I can cut around what you did, we got it.  But you’re letting her get to you.”  I think I said that I was trying to stand my ground.  “If you ever need to leave the set, take five minutes, regain your centre, just say it OK?  I got your back.”  It was another welcome acknowledgement that I wasn’t paranoid.  I went home, cuddled my lady and gritted my teeth for the long haul.  I had to try and protect my performance at the end of the day, that was what mattered.

the balcony scene is in the “director’s cut” on the DVD

As the weeks progressed, all of the actors were called in every day, in case we were needed.  First thing – put through ‘the works’ – costume and make-up – and then sat in our dressing rooms to await the call, often all day.  I often went into the next-door dressing room occupied by the Prison Governor, my boss the legend Brian Glover, who’d memorably played the gym teacher in Ken Loach‘s heartbreaking film Kes.  Brian was from Barnsley and did the voice overs for Tetley Tea Bags : ‘Tetley. Make tea bags. Make Tea.‘

Brian Glover as Andrews

Brian regaled me with stories from his days as a professional wrestler, fighting on the circuit with Giant Haystacks, Big Daddy and Mick McManus. ‘There’s money in ugly Ralph‘ he would announce, his squashed ear a keepsake of his years playing rugby.  Every 45 minutes the lovely 2nd AD Marcia Gay would knock and pop her head around the door – ‘Gentlemen. You won’t be required for the next 45 minutes. Just relax‘.  This became alarmingly irritating until one day Brian swivelled his giant head in her direction and asked ‘Is the money the same?‘  Marcia was puzzled.  ‘Yes‘ she said. ‘Well Fook Off Then!‘ shouted Brian.  Rude and fucking funny.

Fincher on the camera with Alex Thomson alongside him who had taken over as DP when Jordan Cronenweth was too ill to continue

There were eventually four units running at the same time – 1st Unit with David Fincher directing and another legend Chris Carreras as 1st AD.  The eye of any storm, the 1st AD basically runs the set, oversees all of the departments and keeps a keen eye on who is slowing the unit down.  The 1st AD is basically making the film.  Chris had an amazingly calm temperament but I saw him biting his tongue a couple of times.  Years later in 1999 I would contact him and ask him to 1st AD my film New Year’s Day, which he graciously agreed to do.  Without him it wouldn’t have got made. I was going to create a link there to the blog where I talk about the film that I wrote and which actually got made.  So scarred am I from this experience that 220 blog posts later I haven’t even started to think about discussing it.  Watch this space !

Paul McGann as Golic

Meanwhile back in Pinewood, the other 3 units which might or might not need actors for any given day were :  2nd Unit with Martin Brierly directing (and Nick Heckstall-Smith assisting, whom I would also work with later), Action Unit doing Alien Stuff and other SFX, and a Fire Unit which set fire to things and put them out while stunt guys ran around with falmes one their clothes.   We were all required, at one point or another, on all of these units.  But there were interminable days when nothing happened.  Backgammon became institutionalised, with American actors Chris Fields and particularly Holt McCallany relieving us of our wages on a regular basis with ruthless use of the doubling dice. I soon saw the error of this form of time-wasting, likewise poker and other competitive pursuits. 

Clive Mantle as William, Peter Guinness as Gregor

One day when it was clear once again that nothing was going to happen a group of us decided to wander around the studio lot and see what else was going on.  Like a bunch of escaped prisoners escorted by a correction facility officer.  That was me.  We went into one of the bigger studio buildings (Alien 3 had the majority but some were still available for hire) – I can’t remember precisely who was in that gang but I think Peter Guinness, Paul Brennan, Clive Mantle and Danny Webb certainly were. Maybe Niall Buggy and Vincenzo Nicoli too.  And there was a giant pyramid structure with lights on frames around it and people with cloaks wandering about.  We’d asked permission to visit of course, and the producers knew who we were, what we were doing there.  The band was The K.L.F. and they were shooting a video for their single 3am Eternal which had been at Number 1 in the charts that January.  A video it turned out, for the US market. We watched a take with smoke and lights, bleeps and heavy metal guitar chords, acid house beats and rap, capes and cloaks. It was all a bit mental.  Then they took a break.

We wandered into the next studio through a heavy door.  And there was Kylie Minogue, dressed for the Shocked video. We were all introduced and I became suddenly aware of a tiny elfin Australian blonde woman being dwarfed by half a dozen dirty shaven-headed prisoners from outer space.  She shook everyone’s hand then gently wandered away and asked one of her people if they could ask us politely to leave.  Which we did.  Poor love.

Kylie Minogue is Shocked at the power of love in 1991

There’s a curious link here because Bill Drummond, (who with Jimmy Cauty is The K.L.F.) had worked as an A&R man for WEA (now Warners) in London in the mid-80s and had apparently spent half a million pounds on a band called Brilliant who never quite took off.  Stock Aitken & Waterman were writers & producers for Brilliant, and Jimmy Cauty was in the band along with Martin Glover aka Youth from Killing Joke.  And Stock Aitken & Waterman were now writing and producing for Kylie, along with a vast stable of acts including Donna Summer, Mel & Kim and Jason Donovan.  Kylie & Jason had starred together in Aussie soap Neighbours, and to continue the odd waltz between the 2 acts, the K.L.F. had made a single called ‘Kylie Said To Jason‘ which was a hilarious rip-off of ‘Left To My Own Devices‘ by The Pet Shop Boys.  Confused Yet ??

Bill Drummond & Jimmy Cauty

I didn’t make any of these connections at the time.  I was listening to George Michael, Public Enemy, The Breeders. Catching up with Bob Marley and Miles Davis.  Discovering Wagner – again.  Looming on the horizon was Massive Attack. The K.L.F. seemed to me a little like The Tubes, one of my favourite bands to be sure, or the Bonzo Dog Band (see My Pop Life #77), formed by musicians who wanted to lampoon the music and the industry and anything else they could gather into their fiendish net.  Like everything was in quotes. I mean who sang along with the phrase “Ancients of MuMu” without a silly grin on their face?

And of course we were still recovering from the smiley-face rave culture moment from which the K.L.F. appeared to have emerged.  In fact they were rather more like a situationist art project that wanted to burn the whole thing down.  Anarchists.  Their career was inspired partly by the theatre show The Illuminatus Trilogy, written and directed by mad genius Ken Campbell in Liverpool where Bill had been the set designer.  He walked out one day to buy a sandwich and never came back. Later he formed his Pop Group who became The Timelords with big novelty hit Doctoring The Tardis, then The JAMS (Justified Ancients of MuMu) with the single What Time Is Love which got re-issued a number of times from 1988 onward, then The K.L.F.  Their brilliant warped career  peaked a year later in 1992 at the BRIT Awards when Drummond machine-gunned the audience of music industry execs from the stage, and a dead sheep was left at the door of the afterparty with the message “I died for you – bon appetit” attached. A few months later in May 1992 The K.L.F. announced that they had quit the music business and deleted their entire back catalogue.  Other stunts followed such as the infamous burning of a million pounds, the Soup Line, the 17 Choir and other innovative ideas.  Apparently Bill Drummond lived just down the hill from me when I was in Brighton but I never met him, I don’t think.

Niall Buggy as Eric, Danny Webb as Morse

Back on the Alien3 set a few days later it was Valentine’s Day.  I had been sent a card and an AD delivered it to me as we relaxed between shots.  It was of course from Jenny my beloved.  We were not married at that point.  And I could swear Sigourney was looking over my shoulder to see who it was from.  Hahaha.  Fincher was shooting a lot of footage.  “I’m doing long pans & track so they can’t cut into my footage” he explained one day.  It meant that when we had a group scene we could open a book on how many takes it would be.  Anything under five was unpopular.  Over twelve was possible, common even.  I think we did a tenner per set-up.  Someone wrote the names down and the number they’d chosen.  Often no one would win because we went up to Take 17 and no one wanted to put ten of your earth pounds on that.

Here’s an idea…

In fact Sigourney and I had one of our scenes discussing plans regarding telling the company their was an Alien on the planet, and playing a fella who wanted to go home to his wife and kids, rather than perish in some millennial cult group suicide, Aaron ’85’ suggested a plan.  Ripley’s response was tentatively ‘yes maybe‘.  We did a couple of wide shots, then into my single.  Can’t remember how many takes it was – probably around seven or eight.  Then turned round onto Sigourney.  David didn’t like her tone, which suggested that Ripley thought Aaron was a dick.  He didn’t think that was right at that point in the story.  So. One more.  Turn over. Sound Speed. Scene 178 take 17.  Mark it. And….Action! Blah blah blah.  Cut.  Same result.  He’s not your enemy.  Take 22.  Don’t sneer. Take 29.  You think it’s a good idea. Take 34. By which time we were all so exhausted and dizzy from the repetition that Sigourney said the line in a kind of dazed acquiescence and Fincher had the take he wanted.

About a year later in Los Angeles, after the re-shoots, I had two days of ADR in a West LA studio on Olympic Boulevard.  David remembered the scene well, 34 takes.  He’d never done ADR before though – Automated Dialogue Replacement – where you can change the inflexion, emphasis, tone, shade and meaning of a line just by using your voice and matching the lip movements on screen in front of you precisely.  Movie magic.  Some actors hate it, I made friends with the process very early on after I had to voice the whole of my performance as Danny in Withnail & I for the US market. The test screenings had indicated that audience members couldn’t understand what he was saying.  Who could? I did that piece of work at Twickenham Studios in 1987 where the engineer consoled me having to re-do my entire performance at the same speed except more intelligibly by telling me that Michael Caine had done Alfie and Bob Hoskins had also done The Long Good Friday for America.  And yet we were expected to understand Stallone’s mumbles or Pacino’s – hey that’s what it means to be an outlying part of The Empire right?  I can’t remember if I’ve ever seen the US version of Withnail but I suspect it would be a bad idea.  But having said that the experience toughened me up for future sessions.  Especially the Alien 3 session which was two long days – the reason for that was the amount of atmospheric smoke and steam in the design of the film which was very noisy to produce.  Often back in the day on big movies the Sound Department knew that they were recording a guide track only, to be completed and polished in ADR.  So here we were down on W. Olympic and David says – if I’d known about ADR in Pinewood I would never have done 34 takes just for a vocal inflection…

It’s hard to recall now in 2019 how difficult that experience was.  Jenny can remember quite clearly how I would come home every day, full of doubt, full of worry and anguish, just because I was trying to do my best work.  What a fantastic opportunity for me, but you know I was running fast just to stand still.   I remember a visual image I used to produce while trying to explain it to friends, as a learning curve which came from my chest, looped back over my head and stabbed me in the back.  I wondered if, at some point, whether the fact that we were making a horror film in space meant that we had to have a horrible experience in space.  I called Richard E. Grant one day who was shooting Hudson Hawk in Italy – another picnic – and he asked me how much I was getting. I told him. He said

“well – that’s the amount of shit you have to eat then.”

I could almost understand why Bill Drummond had formed The K.L.F.

  My Pop Life #220 : 3am Eternal (Live at the S.S.L.) – The K.L.F. 3am Eternal (Live at the S.S.L.) - The K.L.F. ( The Ancients of Mu Mu )

[lorrainecparker]

Filmtools Filmmaker Friday featuring Filmmaker Geenah Krisht

With hundreds of careers and opportunities, the filmmaking industry can be a unique experience for a filmmaker. Filmtools decided to take a deeper look into the world of a filmmaker. This week, we had the opportunity to speak to filmmaker Geenah Krisht about his work. This is what she said:

What is your name and where are you from?

Geenah Krisht: Geenah Krisht, Los Angeles, CA

Primary role on set?

Geenah Krisht: Producer, Line Producer, 1st AD

Person in the industry that is on the top of his or her game in your role:

Geenah Krisht: Jenni Konner

If you had to impress someone with your work, what would be the most “well-known” content that you’ve worked on?

Geenah Krisht: The last feature I worked on was 1985 directed by Yen Tan starring Cory Michael Smith, Jamie Chung, Virginia Madsen, and Michael Chiklis.

Best craft services food?

Geenah Krisht: Twizzlers

What’s the coolest project you’ve worked on before?

Geenah Krisht: I produced a comedic TV Pilot last year, Natherine: Future Experience, that was just accepted into ITVFest. It was definitely the most hilarious, crazy, fun, tiresome, perfect production I’ve poured my energy into as of late. I cannot wait to see where ITVFest takes it… hopefully finishing out production for all of Natherine Season 1.

When you arrive at set, what’s the first thing you do?

Geenah Krisht: If I’m producing, greet the homies, get my little production office nook all set up, then pour myself a cup of coffee. If I’m ADing, greet the homies, make sure everyone has sides, schedules, call sheets for the day, check in with my 2nd, then pour myself that cup of coffee.

How did you break into this industry?

Geenah Krisht: I interned at a film company during college where I was working under the producer and creating content on a talk show with the Dallas Cowboys.

What challenges have you faced?

Geenah Krisht: This industry is a challenge in and of itself, but finding and surrounding myself with respectful, genuine humans has been the most rewarding challenge of all.

Do you have a piece of essential gear that you don’t leave without?

Geenah Krisht: I always have my G2 pilot pen, my laptop, and my aluminum anything-proof clipboard— which can always be found at Filmtools.

Current TV obsession?

Geenah Krisht: Currently re-watching all of Parks and Rec and obsessing over Another Period on Comedy Central. Also, I’m currently impatiently waiting for Better Things on FX and Broad City on Comedy Central to return very, very soon (yay!).

Do you binge-watch new shows or pace them out?

Geenah Krisht: I am definitely a binge watcher. When I have time to watch shows, it means I’ve really got time to watch shows. And when I am super busy, I have no time to watch anything at all. There’s nothing better than wrapping production on a show and then binge watching yourself back to health (lol).

What piece of gear do you have your eye on?

Geenah Krisht: I’ve got my eyes peeled for an affordable light panel with adjustable color temperature and brightness. I’d love to add that to my gear closet.

Camera – Should you own or rent?

Geenah Krisht: Depends on what department you work in, where your career lies, what gigs you are working, but I lean toward renting almost always. Most times when you’ve got the budget to hire on a cinematographer, you’ve also got the budget to rent out whatever camera package is right for the project (a.k.a. whatever the director and DP decide on together after breaking down the script etc.)

Lenses – Should you own or rent?

Geenah Krisht: For me, rent. Like I said though, it truly depends on what department you work in, where your career lies, what gigs you are working.

What are you currently working on?

Geenah Krisht: I am developing a comedy series formatted for broadcast television at about 21-24 minutes each with my co-writer Zain Haidar. I’m also putting the finishing touches on a feature script with writer/director Rachel Wilson and writer Dave Van Dorselaer.

Rachel Wilson and I also co-founded the clothing brand More Feminist Comedy Please a couple of years back. We currently have t-shirts and stickers, but we are expanding to have sweatshirts, hats, pins, and magnets in the very near future.

What advice would you give to people interested in this industry?

Geenah Krisht: Be honest with yourself about what you fires you up, and then go for it. No time for safety nets because if you’ve got one, you’re going to use it.

Where can people follow you on social?

Geenah Krisht: Twitter and Instagram @geenahkrisht

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