#also hi sorry for answering asks from uhhhhh two weeks ago. lol.
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omg I don’t remember the Van Gogh ep very well pls say more
there’s something just very unpleasant and patronising about the whole tone that the episode takes. i’m not especially fond of the tendency to narrativise real people anyway, but i think some of dw’s other episodes manage to strike a more lighthearted tone which aims to build a plot around the presence of a famous historical figure (charles dickens, agatha christie, shakespeare, regrettably churchill), sometimes exploiting biographical details (the plot of the unicorn and the wasp hinges on christie’s real-life three-day disappearance, for instance, and draws not inconsiderably from the breakdown of her marriage) but often not seeking to inhabit or interiorize the historical figure in question to an extent that supercedes the desire to like, tell a story in an episode of doctor who. the tone of the episodes doesn’t tend to veer outside of the register of like, It’s The Fun BBC Science Fiction Show.
by contrast, there’s something very … condescending, i think, about how van gogh (the real van gogh!) is treated in vincent and the doctor. it strikes this odd tone between like a platitudinous approach to the nebulous concept of ‘mental health’ of the #BeKind ilk and this almost voyeuristic desire to paint a mentally ill man as, like, at once necessarily separate from the audience such that we must Encounter him (the presumed audience is never themselves mentally ill; we are here to Learn about mental illness and to Reflect on our desire to disenfranchise the mentally ill! etc) and available to us as a source from which we can extract all sorts of Lessons about Mental Health. the tone of the episode is very self-serious; it is very clearly aware of itself as an episode with Something To Say. that being, that VVG’s suicidality couldn’t have been prevented by the doctor and amy or by idk The Power of Art (And One’s Own Legacy Within It), that the doctor is limited in what ‘monsters’ he can fight and what ‘monsters’ he cannot, that we (for whom the doctor + amy briefly become audience surrogates 1 and 2, amy in particular) are tasked with Being Kind anyway because we might make a small difference in someone’s life such that they, for example, dedicate a painting of sunflowers to us. (lmfao?)
it’s just weirdly cannibalistic; it’s taking this historical figure and extrapolating a bunch of like, sweeping moralising statements and supposedly affecting scenes (i know many people find the scene in the musée d’orsay vv affecting; i thought it was stupid, sorry), trying to say something about artistic brilliance & artistic legacy but not really landing on anything coherent or interesting beyond like, art by marginalised people is depreciated (true!) but we can fix that by appreciating it, in the musée d’orsay (fuck off!), but Even That can’t make someone not suicidal (true but collapsed by the narrative as quickly as it comes, and also not really … interesting). it wants so badly to say something about van gogh, but it doesn’t feel like an episode that cares about van gogh the man as much as it cares about using van gogh as a metonymic shorthand for all these ideas around Mental Health and Art and Madness and Legacy. which is what i meant when i said it feels cannibalistic—and intrusive at points! i felt uncomfortable watching it in ways that i didn’t with eg. the dickens, christie, shakespeare eps.
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author interview tag game
thank you for the tag, @pandora15! <3
Name: caroline
Fandoms: mostly the clone wars, but i also have some marvel stuff, and waaay back in the day, i wrote some doctor who and merlin stuff!
Where you post: primarily on ao3! i mostly just write on tumblr when i’m accepting prompts from like...ask games or something.
Most Popular Oneshot: real
Most Popular Multichap: to these memories (this fic only recently hit 1k kudos, and my heart?? w h a t)
Favorite Story You’ve Written: def. to these memories because a) longest fic i’ve ever written, and b) oh, the hours i logged into writing this fic, and c) oh, the outlining that went into this fic...i’m very proud of myself for completing the fic, and of course, i credit this to everyone who showed their lovely support for the story. :’)
Fic You Were Nervous to Post: uhhh definitely too far just because it’s...rather personal. i sometimes say that there’ll be a scene or two or just straight up a line or two that’s plucked out of my real life, and i think it’s inevitable for writers of any kind, including fic writers, to isolate their real lives completely from whatever they’re writing, and?? this fic is probably the most personal for me because of that. i remember kinda hem-hawwing about posting it, because i was like whoa, maybe this is a little too personal? but then i steeled myself and was like, “okay, well, would this have lifted my spirits when i needed a story like this??” and then decided to post it.
How you choose your titles: i def. toss and turn between titles! there’s a few fics of mine that are straight-up song lyrics (no surprise there), but to my surprise (as i was looking through my catalogue of fics just now), i realize that a lot of my fics are usually just words or two about what i think might have been extremely important to the story. (or captures the overall tone/theme of the story, anyways.)
Do you outline? for multi-chapter fics and relatively long one-shots with lots of moving parts, i’ll outline. but for shorter one-shots and prompts, i’ll usually just stick with the image that compelled me to write the prompt/one-shot in the first place! (and then kinda write around that.)
Complete: uhhhhh, i’m gonna answer relatively for all my clone wars fics, because in total, i have 74 completed fics. (make that...75, hopefully in a few minutes or hours!) but out of clone wars fics, i have 46 completed fics! (and again, hopefully 47 in a little while.) a part of me is lowkey hoping that i’ll get up to 100 total fics by the end of this year. a part of me highly doubts it, but given how much i was able to write over summer break, i’m...intruiged if i wind up somehow writing another twenty or so fics by the end of this year. (asfsf my wip list is long enough to fill in for another twenty fics. caroline finish all your wips challenge.)
In Progress: okay, so officially, time, wondrous time is in progress and online. but in terms of the works in progress on my laptop...i have...*mutters, counting* fourteen official wips. (ten of them are one-shots, and the other four are longform fics. one of them, i’m hoping to release next week (!!!), and another, i’m hoping to release hopefully around mid-december. uhhh so fingers crossed??)
Coming Soon/Not Yet Started: oops, i guess i kinda already answered that question, but eh, might as well! the one coming out next week (hopefully!! caroline get your shit together challenge!!) is titled most ardently, and it’s an obitine au based off pride & prejudice because i cannot and will not shut up about obitine being the period drama ship out of star wars okay--
and then the other longform fic that is very overdue is called getting lost in a big galaxy, which is a fix-it of sorts taking place after season 5. anakin’s gone missing, and obi-wan winds up going on a galaxy-ride road trip with ahsoka (who, remember, has left the order) to find their idiot. this is honestly my excuse to just write more obi-wan and ahsoka content. hopefully, that’ll be posted in december!! (despite the fact i...originally meant to post it in august oOps.)
and then there’s this other longform fic which...might be coming in early 2021 called red, underlined, which is essentially...uh. everyone’s a stressed out law-school student, and anakin might have accidentally murdered professor palpatine, and now anakin, obi-wan, ahsoka, padme, and rex are all trying to find out what the hell to do with themselves because they’re all in on it. (def. influenced by how to get away with murder except without the criminal justice professor to lead them through the ropes. so more chaos. kind of a dark comedy vibe, if anything else? anakin no is major theme in this one. uh, i mean, maybe anakin was justified in murdering creep palpatine because our gang’s gonna find out what was going on in the background, but either way! lots of “holy shit are we good people are we bad people what are we doing”. lots of questions about morality! ethics! law school student study nights with anakin sprawled out on the floor and obi-wan wearing glasses (which he pushes up the bridge of his nose whenever he’s about to lecture anakin that no, that’s not how that statute works, dumbass) and ahsoka just bringing snacks and rex catching paper airplanes and padme being the one to supply everyone with very neat flashcards. this fic is gonna be an absolute beheamoth, and i’m estimating about 45 chapters? like...130K+ words? help? yeah idk either this really blew up in my head
and then...this stupid, wonderful, boring, amazing job, which is...office x tcw au. only not? it’s very, very loosely based off the office, but not really. obi-wan moves in as a new manager of a company, and we’ve got anakin being like “lol new guy i’m gonna mess with him”, and ahsoka being the one who’s both like “please don’t mess with our new boss” but also being like “actually, wait, lemme help”, rex being in hr and being like “i don’t get paid enough for this”. (also there’s some parts that are written like actual interviews like you would find in the office, so there’s this one bit where uhhh
Obi-Wan flicks his eyes to the cameras in silent question before turning back to Ahsoka. “Well, if you need to call maintenance, then I hardly think you need my permission—”
“Thanks!” Ahsoka says quickly, and she’s about to disappear from the doorway when Obi-Wan stands up.
“Wait, Ahsoka, what exactly—”
Ahsoka re-appears at the doorway. “Oh, right,” she says. “Um—maybe just stay away from the men’s bathroom for a little bit.” She pauses.
“Actually, just stay away from them for the rest of the day.” She hovers by the door for a minute longer, and then she adds quickly, “And maybe also avoid the breakroom. Everything’s fine!”
And with a perfectly not-fine smile, Ahsoka disappears from the doorway.
Obi-Wan stares at where Ahsoka was just a moment ago, and the he turns to the cameras in disbelief. “Did she just—” Unable to finish his own sentence, Obi-Wan starts out the door. “Ahsoka?”
The camera follows Obi-Wan out of the conference room and into the breakroom. There are only muffled shouts—Anakin’s shouts, and then Rex’s, and then Ahsoka’s frantic “no, sorry, everything’s fine!”, and then Obi-Wan’s loud, “What is going on in here?”
surprise y’all just got a snippet i’m sorry can you tell i’m weirdly into this au?? i need to rewrite some scenes but uh there you go
Prompts: for the most part, yes! i have some stuff in my faq about prompts that i’ll probably turn down (mostly anything that’s...above a certain rating/really, realy heavy themes that i just don’t think i can tackle with justice or with enough education on my end). i can be a little slow with prompts, but i’ll get to all of them in time!
Upcoming Work You’re Most Excited About: uhhhh i have too many that i’m excited about. literally i can write a mini essay on every single one of the fics i’m working on? but uhhh i guess since i already talked about all my major longform fics above (asdfasdfsd didn’t mean to do that, i’m so sorry for everyone who had to scroll past that word-vomit), i guess the one i’m most excited about releasing is the post season 7 obi-wan-and-ahsoka-finally-talk-about-how-they-miss-each-other-also-sorry-for-fighting-with-you-i-know-you-were-just-trying-your-best fic. (not a whole ton of spoilers for this one, but uh. i’m looking at some of these scenes and making frustrated sounds because there’s this one particular instance where i’m like, ahsoka. ahsoka just talk to him just ta lk to him but then lol no talking :)) also maybe some h/c? lowkey sickfic might be involved in this somehow? might have accidentally served as a precursor to to these memories? help? this fic just ballooned. caroline keep your ideas contained challenge!)
No Pressure Tags: @lightasthesun @soplantyourownflowers @ohhellokenobiand anyone else who wants to join!
#tag game#thank you!!#caroline.....control your wips challenge#also i am so sorry this got sO long and SO OUT OF HAND#also....lol caroline stop writing so many longform fic challenge#i really love writing one-shots#i really really love writing one shots#but like also. also there's a part of me that's like 'im gonna hyperfixate on this au sO HARD'#thankfully tho i think those are all the longform wips#there's also that one time travel fix it longform fic i have in the back of my head....#but lol i still haven't outlined it yet
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Long ass post ahead. TL;DR I found an old set of questions and decided to answer them again 7 years later because why not.
1: What are you wearing?
2014: Some Shorts and a shirt I accidentally stole from my brother.
2021: Panic! at the Disco shirt and some running shorts
2: Ever been in love?
2014: Oh yes, sadly...
2021: pfft.
3: Ever had a terrible breakup?
2014: Not technically, but I once had my homecoming date hook up with another girl.
2021: hahahahahaha. Yes.
4: How tall are you?
2014: like 5 foot 1, maybe 2? I dunno.
2021: 5’4”, apparently
5: How much do you weigh?
2014: How about no...
2021: Who’s to say ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
6: Any tattoos?
2014: Yes! I got one on my left shoulder blade not too long ago. I often forget I have it, actually lol.
2021: I’m up to five, and six is planned.
7: Any piercings?
2014: I do. I have double lobe piercings, and my left ear at the top. No non-ear piercings. Those seem uncomfortable to get, tbh.
2021: Uh...double lobe, helix, forward helix, tragus, nose, and septum.
8: OTPs?
2014: Marshall and Lilly on HIMYM. I mean, I think that's what this is asking. Right?
2021: I’m still not 100% sure what this means but I’m doubling down on Marshall and Lilly.
9: Favorite show?
2014: I'm still recovering from the ending of How I Met Your Mother, but I also love Criminal Minds, and the Big Bang Theory.
2021: HIMYM, Criminal Minds, Stranger Things, and Masked Singer.
10: Favorite bands?
2014: I pretty much love anything, so I'll try to shorten it to Love and Theft, Newsboys, t.A.T.u, Beast, and Fun.
2021: My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, twenty one pilots, Maroon 5, Relient K.
11: Something you miss?
2014: Going to the park and just lying in the grass with my friends or crushes. I know, I'm Cheesy.
2021: Not having responsibilities or bills to pay.
12: Favorite Song?
2014: ...why do they even bother asking this? Tbh, “I'll Be” by Edwin McCain, and “Hello, My Name is” by Matthew West
2021: “you should see me in a crown” by Billie Eilish and “no body, no crime” by Taylor Swift
13: How old are you?
2014: Nineteen. I feel old.
2021: ...twenty-six.
14: Zodiac sign?
2014: Aries, barely.
2021: (not) shockingly, I’m still an Aries.
15: Quality you look for in a partner?
2014: Just someone who's willing to go on cheesy dates at the park, and love me for who I am. And a Christian. Yea, I'm one of those people. Sorry...
2021: dude just someone who’s gonna stick with me.
16: Favorite quote?
2014: It's actually a verse. I love Jeremiah 29:11. It's actually part of what's tattooed on my shoulder; right below a cross.
2021: “it do be like that sometimes”
17: Favorite actor?
2014: Uhhhhh. Matthew Gray Gubler, or David Tennant. I love them both :)
2021: Matthew Gray Gubler.
18: Favorite color?
2014: Green, or pink. Depends on the shade and whatnot.
2021: pastels. mostly green.
19: Loud music or soft?
2014: If I'm alone in the car? loud. Anywhere else I enjoy my soft music.
2021: If I’m by myself loud but if there’s others I like to keep it low enough so we can still talk.
20: Where do you go when you’re sad?
2014: My Room, or the park not to far from me. I like parks, if you haven't noticed.
2021: My room
21: How long does it take you to shower?
2014: Uh, probably about 10 minutes.
2021: Either 10 minutes or 45 minutes. There is no in-between
22: How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
2014: About 30 minutes. I like to sleep tbh.
2021: Maybe 20 minutes at the most. Cutting off all my hair really took some time off my getting ready list.
23: Ever been in a physical fight?
2014: heck no.
2021: hell no.
24: Turn on?
2014: Cute shy smiles, and geekiness. I love someone who I can be comfortable with.
2021: dorks with a lame sense of humor. I am all about the dad jokes.
25: Turn off?
2014: Those guys who try to make you uncomfortable, or act like they're super cool. I guess that would be douches, huh?
2021: the “oh you should smile more” men.
26: The reasons I joined Tumblr?
2014: I was trying to find a place where I could post stuff without my parents seeing it tbh. I like having a place where like 2 people actually know me.
2021: Because where else can I release the true psychotic chaos within me?
27: Fears?
2014: Being abandoned. And darkness, for sure.
2021: Finding out people only stayed in your life out of obligation and not out of their own choice. And spiders.
28: Last thing that made you cry?
2014: The guy I liked totally looked past me and started telling me about this other girl, after I told him how I felt (not RIGHT after, it had been about two months...but still).
2021: My mom manipulated me into showing up to something I didn’t want to because “I should really go visit family”
29: Last time you said you loved someone?
2014: My best friend and I say I love you after we hang up the phone Lol.
2021: Other than normal parent “Love You”’s, it’s probably been about 3 years.
30: Meaning behind your Tumblr name?
2014: I'm short, totally socially awkward in new situations (and with old friends, now that I think about it) and Idk about the fox. I just like foxes, I guess...
2021: There is no meaning. I like pancakes, space, and dragons.
31: Last book you read?
2014: If you don't count my English Lit book, then it was probably "Only the Good Spy
Young" by Ally Carter, but I don't remember.
2021: oh geez. It was probably “George” or “Rick” by Alex Gino
32: The book you’re currently reading?
2014: Nothing yet. I do have that last Gallagher Girl book to read though. I'll probably start it this weekend.
2021: Nothing. But I never got to that last Gallagher Girl book...
33: Last show you watched?
2014: The Big Bang Theory.
2021: The Masked Singer
34: Last person you talked to?
2014: My dad lol. We were watching the NFL draft.
2021: Guy friend of mine. I went to his place for dinner and some video games.
35: The relationship between you and the person you last texted?
2014: Good Friend
2021: hahahahahahahaha. We’re just friends.
36: Favorite food?
2014: Cajun. Blame my grandparents, that's what they cook a lot lol.
2021: Pasta
37: Place you want to visit?
2014: I wanna go to Alaska. Even though I know it's super cold.
2021: Europe. Specially Spain or France.
38: Last place you were?
2014: I honestly left home like twice today, to bring something to my brother at the High school, then to bring him to a friends house. He has a better social life than me.
2021: Friends place to hang out. We played Stardew then ordered wings and watched a movie.
39: Do you have a crush?
2014: Yes. See question 28 lol. Also, there's this other guy who I got close to last year, but I haven't spoken to him in weeks, and it's killing me.
2021: See guy referred to in 34, 35, and 38.
40: Last time you kissed someone?
2014: Never. I have never kissed anyone. Well, besides like a kiss in the cheek from family. Yeah...
2021: wow it’s probably been about three years.
41: Last time you were insulted?
2014: Recently lol. I guess... I don't really pay attention, or care...
2021: I don’t know. Probably recently.
42: Favorite flavor of sweet?
2014: I'm just gonna act like this doesn't exist, cause idk what it's asking.
2021: Chocolate.
43: What instruments do you play?
2014: I can play the French Horn and Mellophone! I also want to learn the flute, but I can't unless I have something to practice lol.
2021: French Horn, Mellophone, and Ukulele. Still want to learn the flute.
44: Favorite piece of jewelry?
2014: My purity ring. If I forget to put it on, I can seriously feel the emptiness, and it bothers me...
2021: My septum ring! I feel like it’s the first piercing I got for myself, and not just something I thought others would like on me.
45: Last sport you played?
2014: Maybe Soccer? Idk.
2021: pfft. Sports.
46: Last song you sang?
2014: “I'll Be” by Edwin McCain. But I really don't sing well, so it doesn't happen much, unless I'm alone.
2021: “You Belong with Me (Taylor’s Version)” by Taylor Swift and I 100% sang it to my dog.
47: Favorite chat up line?
2014: I don't have one
2021: It’s been 7 years and I still don’t have one.
48: Have you ever used it?
2014: Since i don't have one, no.
2021: Nah.
49: Last time you hung out with someone?
2014: I hung out with my future roommate before I left college yesterday.
2021: When I went to the previously mentioned Guy’s house earlier today.
50: Who should answers these questions next?
2014: Well, I guess any of my followers can choose to, if they want.
2021: Bold of you to assume anyone’s actually going to see this.
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