#also he’s had WEIRD ass fans in the past i cannot imagine him wanting to interact with a fandom as big and intense as this one

[the-casbah-way]

hazbin fans who don’t know christian borle are like “why isn’t he at any of the cast events” brother that’s his whole thing. man gives the performance of a lifetime then immediately disappears never to be seen again. get used to it he is an enigma

[jinnxd]

Not only was I just thinking about you and your fic just as you updated it, you also wrote Mizuki in a way that absolutely made me disgusted, it was too perfect. Like spot on with some of the guys that have hit on me and one I ended up dating. Absolutely gross, I loved it! Even though it made my skin crawl. Like fuck Mizuki, Orochimaru can have his body if you ask me. And I can't wait to absolutely melt when you get to the point of actually making Kiya and Kakashi date. Is fanfiction off of fanfiction a thing? Because I can imagine it now: they get together and everything around the same time as team 7 is formed, and then Naruto and Sasuke get assigned to team 7, and they gotta warm up to Kakashi one way or another, and he to them, and it all ends up in the most adorable family picnic. Or family vacation. Where Kakashi and Kiya are trying to have a romantic moment or two that the kids keep ruining because they're trying to have a dumb contest, the kind Kakashi and Guy regularly have. Meanwhile Kiya and Kakashi are working on a way to take down Danzo. And both of the boys end up overhearing that goal but never know the reason why they wanna do that. And also I headcanon sasunaru so Sasuke leaves after the exams anyway, and along the way realizes his feelings for Naruto run deeper and so he returns to his family. And Naruto realizes his feelings after training with Jiraya. Kakashi and Kiya are kinda weirded out but they've seen weirder things so it's fine. And as a family, they take down Danzo. But during the fight Danzo reveals what he wanted to do with Kiya which makes both kids rage so hard they don't even leave a single atom of him remain once he's dead. Is there a plot to this? Absolutely, it's called revenge and happiness because fuck Danzo and I want everyone else to be happy. Anyway sorry for rambling, THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE, and I love you baiii <3

omg… you were thinking about me?! hehe I’m blushingggg (*´ ˘ `*).｡oO ( ♡ )

I felt horrible writing Mizuki and Kiya’s interactions, but they’re really just all based on past experiences of mine :3 that and I just took every single revolting aspect I could think of and threw them all at him hehehe—self-proclaimed “alpha male”? Check. Constantly interrupts Kiya and refuses to take no for an answer? Check! Negs her at every possible turn? Check, check, check!!!

(AU headcanon: Mizuki is a die-hard Andrew Tate fan)

I feel like we’ve all had shitty experiences with shitty men before (like wtf why are they EVERYWHERE) so this chapter/Mizuki’s WHOLE character is a tribute to all the victims of shitty men (≧o≦) I sincerely hope that the guy you ended up dating did not last long at all, and I hope he got what was coming to him! No one deserves to be treated that way >:(

(but I admit I’m having fun with this—it’s like Mizuki is being put in a public stockade and we all get to throw rotten tomatoes at him :) in a way, it’s nice to see that he’s so widely hated, because WE ALL DESERVE BETTER!!!)

I can’t wait for Kakashi and Kiya to get together, either🤭 there’s been a tiny hint of progress, but there’s still a long way to go until they both stop being idiots and just KISS already 👺

The fanfic of a fanfic is ADORABLE, I love that so much :’) I just want them all to be happy, they deserve so much love <3

And as for the Danzo takedown, there are a million different ideas in my head that are floating around!!! It sort of drives me crazy because everything else has an outline, but Danzo’s demise is just one big question mark🙈 the goal is to have it be a team effort, give everyone a chance to get their revenge, y’know? But then in the meantime Danzo just gets to LIVE until Sasuke’s old enough to beat him up… AHHHH idk idk idk all I know is I want everyone to jump his old mummy-looking ass 😌

RAMBLING IS MY FAV, I LOVE RAMBLING!!! (as we can all tell, I physically cannot shut up… we’re barely halfway through the story and at almost 300k words… oopsie) DONT APOLOGIZE FOR RAMBLING!!!!! Thank *you* for this lovely lovely comment, it was a pleasure to read 🫶🫶🫶

SENDING YOU SO MUCH LOVE!!!! ( •ॢ◡-ॢ)-♡

[jeonqkooks]

Jeeen baby if you need a shield from weird people I'll take care of it 🥹🫶💗🙏

Did you see new suchwita ep dropped? 🥳🙌

Ahhh look, it feels a bit funny since I kinda made my peace with the whole album thing. As long as he's happy with his decisions at the end of the day there's that. I've been thinking about how we can't always know everything that goes on behing the doors right? Idk if you've seen bang pd's interview a few days ago, he mentioned how, at the begining of the year jk wasn't even sure he wanted to release an album (and if I remember he even told us himself in a live that he's not sure about his plans but he'll just follow his intuition) Maybe he thought we would be disappointed if he didn't. Now if you think about it, this second chapter for bts feels sooo rushed in a way and we know why, but you know... I'm trying to imagine that things wouldn't have been so chaotic if it wasn't for m.s. and everything, they would've had way more time for this. But there's really no point.

BUT AGAIN, we all know how jk specifically mentioned in so many interviews over the past few years that he's working on his mixtape (Stay was supposed to be in his mixtape, so was Your eyes tell) and I BET there were some other masterpieces there and it really got me thinking why would he change his mind all of a sudden. Maybe pressure, maybe he didn't think they were good enough and wasn't that confident. We'll never know I guess.

I support him though, he's working hard and who knows, there might be songs in there that I'll like. Still, I cannot lie and say I don't feel a little sad that we're never going to hear some song that HE made (as imperfect as he probably thought they are). This isn't me (or some fans) damanding something, just that little feeling of "what could've been if.." . To me, the songs written/ produced by them weight wayyy more than any other songs out there. Oh well 😬 there's always a next time.

Okayyy rant over. Now I'll just keep an eye out for anyone who wanna bother you 😝🫡 while I watch suchwita ofc!! Take care and keep warm, it's so cold these days! *channeling my inner jimin*

- 🎃

aw pumpkinnnnnnn 😭

yeah i’ve also kinda made peace with the fact that this won’t be an album for me. i’ve mentioned this before and i still stand by it, that it feels like there’s this certain pressure for everyone to release something before enl*sting 😔

you’re right, i’m sure there are other songs that we haven’t heard that were supposed to be for his mixtape. i mourn the loss of them too, just like i did with tae when layover came out. i don’t think being bummed about the old songs means you’re demanding. you’re sad because you know you would’ve liked them, and that’s a completely normal thing to feel. and yes i agree, songs made by them will always feel more personal and have more heart. i’ve already started manifesting for jjk2 lol 😂

(and tbh, i take everything a celebrity says with a grain of salt - even bts - so there are always things that i’m skeptical about)

yessss suchwita 😭 i forgot about it ngl bc it’s been like over a month since the last ep hahaha. but oh lord when i finally watch it it’s gonna be tough since it’s the first ep released after he left 😭😭😭

and YES IT IS COLD WHAT THE HELL. it’s like 10 degrees where i am and it’s only october??? the leaves haven’t even turned yellow but i’m already freezing my ass off. i have a feeling this winter will kill me

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Mon 7 June ‘21

Liam’s podcast with Steve Bartlett is out and while I still don’t care about that guy I’ll give him this-- he does great at getting out of the way and letting Liam talk. And boy does Liam talk! Liam says A LOT and let’s all just pause to send him some big hugs before we get into right? And then look to the future- Liam’s routine is to say ‘things have been terrible but it’s fine, it’s fine NOW’, always, even when that is absolutely obviously not true, and today is no different but for once I actually believe some of his hopeful bits too which is so great! I hope things really are shifting for him and I can’t wait to hear this new song of his. But there’s a lot that’s hard to hear too, oh Liam. He said that he and Maya have broken up (so yes, presumably why he just moved again such a short time after they moved into their haunted house), talked about his struggles with his alcoholism (and said he’s been sober for a month right now, go babe!), shared the usual distressing stories about his time in the band and what that was like for him (and how it still impacts him), and he talked about his new song and how it feels different for him than his past solo music. Truly though there is SO MUCH more than I can get into here or then you can get from the UA highlights- I HIGHLY recommend actually watching at least parts of the video, also because the attempt to summarize so much erases all the charm and humor, of which there is much. If you don’t think you want to watch Liam’s interviews, it has to be because you aren’t watching Liam’s interviews, they’re delightful! Plus really if you care about 1D and want information about what it was like for any of them, listen to Liam, he’s the one who’s out there talking about it.

About Maya he said, that yes, he is now single, and “I’ve just been not been very good at relationships,” and “I’m a proper perfectionist… at the start of the relationship you put out this complete false character like I might as well go in in costume, I’m like putting out something that is not there... kind of like encompassing someone else’s life with your crap rather than just doing your thing and laying out your store from day one. That’s my biggest problem is that I feel like I don’t lay out my store... and then I’m annoyed when they don’t like what I like,” and “I think my problem is I struggle to be on my own sometimes... I dive in and out of relationships too quickly. I’ve not spent enough time on my own to relearn about myself.”

He laughs about his tendency to ask his manager things during interviews; “My fans think that Steve is doing something to me, they’re like liberty for Liam because he always looks to Steve, but that’s because I like him. It’s not because he’s harming me as a person. There’s like a hashtag Liberty for Liam because they think I’m some like prison child,” and he also said “my manager’s my best friend,” (and he’s said in the past he is a big support for him) and mentioned stuff they’d talked about recently around his therapeutic awakenings.

He talked about therapy being something you have to want to do and be ready to do rather than being pushed into, like getting sober, and says that this time around with his own therapy work he’s really felt that and thrown himself into it and he talked a lot about his relationship to therapy in connection with band days. “I mean one of our old managers went to therapy from being a manager of One Direction. So if you can imagine how that feels like the rest of us definitely need some.”

“We were young,” he said, “What I found was I didn’t know I was the boss until like a few months ago, I still don’t even feel like I am now, like I’m such a child. And everyone I work with now is older than me and wiser than me and I’m like what the hell am I doing here with these people. When we were 17 I thought the security guard was like in charge of me so I was like Can we leave the room? No? Oh ok then,” and “when we were in the band, the best way to secure us was just lock us in our rooms. And of course what’s in the room? Minibar. So at a certain point, I thought Well I’m gonna have a party for one and that just seemed to carry on throughout many years of my life... You know I spoke to somebody about this in child development as a teen, the one thing you need is freedom to make choices. That we could do anything we wanted it seemed from the outside but we were always locked in a room at night and then it would be car, hotel room, stage, sing, locked. So it’s like they pulled the dust cloth off, let us out for a minute, but then it’s back underneath again,” and “the day the band ended I was like thank the lord for that. And I know a lot of people are going to be mad with me for saying that, but I needed it to stop. It would kill me.” Anyway, he said, because it wouldn’t be Liam without an upbeat coda, “I don’t want any of this to get lost in translation. I’m not 100% moaning about my life... it’s had its ups and its downs, but I would rather talk about it and it’s therapeutic for me.”

And what about that exciting new song? Liam said, “We have a really cool song in the pipeline... one of the first ones I’ve actually written myself- with some other people, I didn’t write it by myself, but it’s the first one I’ve really liked. And I think I got so used used carting around other peoples songs and not embedding myself creatively in what I do because I was so scared to find out who I was,” and “I don’t really know how I would tour again. I really want to” [on discord today he said he would be touring next year] “I always said throughout my solo career I’d let my song book speak to me. And I don’t think my song book spoke to me to get off my ass. I only became a solo artist because I had Strip That Down. I wasn’t gonna do it, I was gonna leave it alone. I was like, I survived it once thank you very much- but I’m back in now. Because the song, I knew it was right. It felt right with that song, I hadn’t had that. This year, the song we have I feel really really great about. So I’d rather let the music do the talking than me come out and force it. We don’t need any more useless music in the world, it needs to mean something,” and he mentioned the new song on the discord a lot too, most notably picking out a long comment that thanked him for making the fan feel supported and safe and for “putting your heart in everything you do” and for his support of the LGBTQ community to respond to with, “I think you will really like the new song.”

A few other random bits, he said that he thinks there should be a system to make therapy available to musicians in the industry, “I think I’m definitely gonna get a dog because I need routine,” and “I recently started jujitsu,” yeah you and everyone else huh, so do him and Louis and Oli go to the same gym or ???, and he acknowledged that as an addict he may have just transferred that to working out “but there’s a lot worse things to be addicted to then looking after yourself” hmm but he does seem to say that he’s doing better around body image stuff; he talks about having put on weight during lockdown and seeing himself in the BAFTAS performance- “I saw myself... and I was like ‘oh my god I’ve completely let myself go in this’. And it was fine...I feel so much more secure in myself now.” Oh and that he’s written a comedic movie script “based around AA” and his experiences there, such as how “I had a really weird AA experience the first time that I went. My first experience was with Russell Brand.” LMAO yes! Cannot wait, bring on auteur Liam please! Anyway as if ALL THAT wasn’t enough he’s also dove into the lead up to his NFT release; he said “I'm almost ready to share my NFTs with you guys... Who wants to see them?” and posted a tiny preview that tells us its (their?) title for the first time- Lonely Bug.

Niall and Anne Marie perform on Jimmy Fallon tonight, and the hype is already a go! I guess it’s prerecorded, as we’re already seeing pictures from it; they’re singing to each other with the cute car from the video in the background. Niall signed on to a letter to Boris Johnson asking for changes to music streaming revenue rules and signed by 232 artists (including all the artists Johnson recently named as his favorites, haha). Zayn signed on to a Billboard petition to the US senate calling for gun safety laws. The bar Zayn got into the fight in front of posted “Zayn's a regular at Amsterdam Billiards and he is a true gentleman. On Thursday night he was confronted by an inebriated passer-by outside on the street and was called a homophobic slur. We support Zayn & condemn homophobia in the strongest terms!” And also PS omg again because it just isn’t going away: Harry’s beauty company is called Pleased As, his name is Harry Edward Styles so yes when listed last name first, as legal documents do, it spells SHE but it is not a “feminist abbreviation” (WHAT? even??) nor the name of the business.

[trashmenofmarvel]

Branded - Chapter 57 (Final)

Pairing: Demon!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You find your relic.

(This is a fan AU of Falling’s Just Another Way to Fly by araniaart​ . Please check out this incredible series for all of your demon Bucky needs.)

AO3

You’d only been to the ancient Sanctum a few times, with strict access to the library for your studies and nowhere else, and normally you would be excited to visit the unofficial headquarters of the Mystic Arts.

But now, as you followed Wong to the room of portals that would lead to the Nepal sanctum, your stomach twisted and your heart raced. You couldn’t even enjoy the fact this was where Strange had gone on his near-disastrous pilgrimage. The idea of the Ancient One kicking him out on his ass was an entertaining one, though you were still glad she eventually trained him. As irritated as you were about a lot of things regarding the former surgeon, he and Wong both had taught you nearly everything you knew.

Plus, you’d seen the scars on his hands. As arrogant and egotistical as he appeared, Strange had suffered to get where he was. Not unlike yourself. Not unlike Bucky.

The Orb of Agamotto hung within the circular room where other sorcerers consulted with it, verifying that the magical Earthly shields were still intact. Past them were three doors leading to the other sanctums, including the one in Kathmandu.

You and Bucky followed Wong through, the familiar feeling of displacement shifting your stomach and throwing you off balance for a moment. Neither Wong nor Bucky were as unsteady as you were. It had been something you were embarrassed about, but according to Strange during one of your lessons, it simply meant you were more sensitive to spatial displacement.

As Wong led you both through the ancient stone hallways, past the commons where other sorcerers were in training, doubt crept along your nerves. Someday, possibly sooner than you were prepared, all of these people were going to follow you. Look to you for guidance, for teaching. For protection.

How were you supposed to become the next Ancient One if you couldn’t even walk through a portal without getting dizzy?

This wasn’t going to work. The idea was crazy enough to begin with. The Ancient One had to be wrong. You were going to step into her office and nothing would happen. You would make a fool of yourself; you weren’t any more talented or skilled than any other sorcerer. Just half a year ago, you’d had no idea demons and magic were even real.

And now, you were expected to carry on the mantle as one of the most powerful sorcerers on Earth? How was that even possible? How could you ever be worthy enough to—

Wong opened a door using a complicated series of hand gestures, and as soon as you stepped through, your panicked mind fell silent. Energy thrummed along your skin, setting the hairs upright.

“Here it is.”

Wong’s announcement was unnecessary; you would know this place in your dreams, even though you had never been.

It was a simple room with a single large, circular window pointed towards the mountains over the city. Potted plants perched on most available surfaces that weren’t covered with books, scrolls, and odd knickknacks.

There was only a single writing desk pushed to the side, humble and unobtrusive. The rest of the room was empty space with a single well-worn green rug in the middle. But the plants made everything seem alive and verdant. It felt very much like a place the Ancient One would spend her time. It was a reflection of her, in a way. Quiet, but hidden with secret truths.

“Take a look around,” Wong said, but you were already moving. Slowly and with intense focus, you circled the room, reaching out and feeling, not with your hands but with your mind.

Odd and powerful energy pervaded the room, muted by spells but still apparent to you. They were coming from the artifacts that were laid out, seemingly casually, on the shelves and desks.

Most of them seemed as plain and unimportant as the room itself. A cracked vase with the lip stained red. A golden helmet that was varnished and faded, but two glittering horns jutted from the temples. A knobby staff with a smooth, grey stone fixed at one end, as modest as any walking stick except for the melodic hum that emanated from the stone. You had a feeling neither Wong nor Bucky could hear it.

But despite all the weird, wonderful oddities in your reach, you were drawn elsewhere. You approached one corner of the room where lay a pile of old scrolls and their cloth wrappings, and moved them aside with care to reveal what was hidden underneath.

It was a sword hilt. Just the hilt. There was no blade, not even a piece of broken metal. The metal was dulled with time and flaked with rust, the pommel grey and dirty.

You reached out and hesitated. Fingertips inches away, something stopped you. The knowledge that once you took hold of the relic, everything would change.

You glanced over your shoulder at Bucky.

He was watching you with close attention, as was Wong, but when he caught your eye he gave a small smile of encouragement. He supported you, even though he had to know what this meant, or at least had a good idea of it.

Not every sorcerer found their relic within the Ancient One’s study.

Comfort and warmth, so strong it could only be described as love, flooded across the bond and washed away your fears. You returned his smile, even if it was shaky, and you held on to that feeling as you turned back to the hilt.

You closed the distance, wrapped your fingers around the relic, and lifted it.

It was surprisingly heavy; that was your only observation before it began. The hilt thrummed in your palm, vibrating so fast you nearly dropped it.

The rust flaked away from the metal, leaving it polished and silver. The grey pommel was shaken of its dirt, and you realized it was white bone, the metal wrapping around it to form the grip and crossguard.

The thrumming didn’t stop, but you couldn’t let go even if you wanted to. Your fingers seized around the metal, energy teeming up your hand and arm. When it reached your right shoulder, all the way up to your pentagram, the sigil burned in a way it hadn’t done since the ritual.

Bucky must have sensed your panic because he rushed forward, but you backed away from him fast, instinct screaming at you to put a safe distance between you now.

It was a good thing you had; the energy from your sigil exploded down your arm, through your hand, and into the hilt. A burst of red light shot outward, forcing you to turn away from the blinding beam.

When the light dimmed and you could see again, blinking away the after images, you stared at the sword. That’s what it was now. A glowing red blade, seemingly made entirely of light. The energy that came from it was purely of the demon realm, scorching and sulfuric.

“What…” You choked the words past your dry throat. “What is this?”

There were only a handful of times you’d ever seen Wong shocked. So, that was three powerful sorcerers you’d rendered speechless in the span of a day.

“The blade of Hell, or so it is spoken. None in the history of the order had been able to unlock its powers, rendering it anything more than a broken hilt.” He leveled you with a somber stare. “It is called Daemonio Vexatur. Which means—“

“—to become a demon.”

Wong raised a brow.

“Rough translation, but yes.”

“So, it’s a demon sword?” asked Bucky, eyeing the glowing blade. He was understandably wary, and honestly, was accepting what was happening better than you were. You were still stuck on the fact that you were holding a glowing-freaking-sword in your hand.

“Yes. And no,” Wong said in traditional teaching-fashion. “A demon cannot wield it, but it takes demonic energy to power.”

“Oh. So that’s why my sigil and my entire arm feel like they’re on fire.”

Bucky’s mouth opened and he took a step forward, protectiveness sizzling along the bond, and you gave him a hurried smile.

“Kidding. Sort of.” You smiled wider through your clenched teeth. “It is really uncomfortable.”

Bucky’s dark look told you he didn’t believe you, and with what you imagined was coming from your end of the bond, you didn’t blame him. Holding the sword was like holding on to a live wire that was also burning. There was a molten jolt connecting the hilt to your sigil, and you were just hoping to not get incinerated in the process.

And just like that, the connection was gone, and the relief of your arm no longer being on fire was dimmed by the disappointment as the sword was extinguished, leaving nothing more than a gleaming hilt.

“What happened?” You frowned, eyeing the relic as if searching for an on switch.

“It will take time and training to effectively control your relic.”

“How long?” You looked up when Wong didn’t answer immediately, catching the serious dent in his brow.

“It’s hard to say. No one in living memory has wielded the blade, and it was believed no one ever would.”

Wong gave a heavy sigh.

“So of course, you would be the one to wield it.”

You returned your gaze to the relic and turned over the hilt in your hand, admiring the metal and bone. You wondered if the bone was from a demon, a safe bet considering.

“So.” You carefully put down the hilt and turned to give Bucky your best serious face. “How does it feel to have a wizard girlfriend with a lightsaber?”

Wong rolled his eyes. He knew you well enough by now to know what you were doing, but he didn’t comment on your attempts to over your fear with humor. He muttered something about reporting to Strange as he left the office.

But Bucky…

Worry and fondness conflicted across the bond, struggling to coexist. He stepped forward, the green cloth tunic he’d found in one of the drawers of your room stretched unfairly tight across his chest. It was the largest he could find in a hurry, and it was nearly enough to distract you from your own anxieties.

“I think…” Bucky wrapped his arm around you, drawing you into an embrace that you melted into easily. “That I’m scared for you. I’m confused as hell what this means, and I’m guessing this isn’t going to make your life any easier or less complicated. But… I’m also proud of you.”

You could sense the pride easily, but Bucky was trying to bury the fear that was close to terror. He truly was scared of what this meant. You were too, and the Ancient One’s words weighed heavily on your shoulders.

There was a questioning feeling tugging at your thoughts, and you remembered too late that Bucky could sense the same anxiety, even if he didn’t have all the details. So you smoothed out your tumultuous thoughts and covered them the best way you knew how.

“You say that to all the wizard girlfriends.”

“You’re deflecting.”

“That is what swords do.”

Bucky pulled back far enough to stare at you with narrowed eyes, but when he touched his horns to yours it was with such gentleness that you nearly forgot to breathe. But breathe you did, drinking in his familiar, soothing scent and allowed the tension to drain from your muscle.

“We should head back.” Bucky said after a moment of intimate, comfortable silence in which you finally relaxed. “Got a bastard to catch.”

You reluctantly let go first, knowing he was right and you couldn’t stay here forever. Turning toward the sword hilt, you reached for it and paused. You took a small detour and picked up an old, ratty cloth nearby and carefully wrapped the relic within. Until you had a better grasp of how to wield the sword, it was probably a wiser idea to not handle it directly. You had no idea if it was sentient like Strange’s cloak, and it would be better not to accidentally set it off. Slicing off your own leg was a poor way to convince anyone that you were the next Ancient One.

On your journey back down the halls toward the portal door, Bucky said, “So… what are you going to name it?”

He smiled at your sideways glance.

“All cool swords get a name. It’s kind of a universal rule.”

Maybe you didn’t know Bucky as well as you thought you did, because you had no idea he was such a damn nerd.

“Yeah? You’ll have to bestow all your sword knowledge on me.”

“Is that a sexual innuendo?”

“It is now.”

Bucky’s smile died on his lips when you were no longer at his side. He paused and looked back where you had stopped at the threshold to the portal room.

“What if I can’t do this?” The doorway before you was no longer just a doorway. It was an insurmountable hurdle, and your feet wouldn’t budge from the floor. “What if I fail?”

Bucky approached slow and steady, his expression gentle and fond.

“You won’t. You’re too stubborn to fail.” A warm hand softly cupped your cheek, his human one, and you leaned into it. He laughed silently at your predictable need to be touched, but his expression faded into something more serious. “But on the very slim chance you do, then you get back up and you start again. Just as you always have.”

Your stomach fell. Bucky couldn’t understand what failure meant in your case. You didn’t even know what it meant, but you could guess. If you failed to be the Ancient One everyone needed… then there might not be any second chances.

Bucky wrapped you in his arms one more time, undoubtedly sensing his words of encouragement hadn’t hit as effectively as he’d wanted.

“Whatever this means, you finding that relic… Whatever happens when we find Zemo...” Bucky’s voice was deep in his chest, a rumbling sound that never failed to comfort you. “I’ll be here.”

You returned his embrace, gripping him tightly as you pressed your cheek against his chest.

“I know.”

And you did, too. Bucky would be there for you. Not because he was compelled to be, and not out of a sense of duty or guilt to protect you. He would be by your side by choice.

And that fact made Zemo’s escape, the Ancient One’s words, and your own self-doubt a little easier to bear. Because you and Bucky would weather it.

Together.

“When wounds are healed by love, the scars are beautiful.” –David Bowles

[rnegitsune]

Ok so I thought I'd put together some horror stories from my time as a babymetal fan bc of how drastic the shift in the fandom has been the past year or so. For context I got into babymetal in like june of 2014 (all 3 girls were still underage at the time, I was 22; when I first got into them I thought I would be considered an older fan lmao the naivete, the innocence of new fan me wow I know now I'm not at all in the older half of the fandom esp considering I was born the same decade as su and moa), and I made this blog in I think may of 2015.

I've had people say I should compile men being gross into a post and I just couldn't do that out of fear for my own mental health but this will be pretty close. These are all my experiences with this fandom over the years; I'm definitely missing some but what I do remember should do well to cover most of how this fandom used to be vs now. It's gonna be a lot and tw for men being gross about minors.

Back in my first year or so of this blog I on multiple occasions got dms from men asking to be friends. At the time my bio only said my name and my pronouns. I've always been cautious of dms so I'd ask their age and every single one was considerably older than me. I wouldn't usually answer after that bc no thanks but they would generally try to continue convos til I blocked. The only one I still had was this one

After I put my age in my bio, which was 23 at the time, I never got a dm like that again; take from that what you will. But if you're young please be wary of this hell fandom even now. And if you're an older fan and esp an older male fan reading this, don't dm people trying to be friends. I was over 18 and it still creeped me out to no end.

One of my real first men in this fandom are disgusting moments was a blog back in like 2015 or 2016 who I had some contact with due to common interests; he was a huge yui stan and made bm content. He was like 28 or 29 at the time and I eventually noticed he would tag idols, mostly kpop girls, by their body parts (legs, butt, etc) which is disgusting enough as it is but then I saw him do the same for literal minors, like tzuyu from twice. I messaged him asking what the hell he was doing objectifying women but also actual children and he blocked me lmao. He later unblocked me to let me know that's just how he tagged things and it was my fault he had anxiety and then he blocked me again.

Back before the tumblr purge this fandom was repulsive to a degree I cannot even begin to describe. Someone would reblog something from me, I'd go to their blog and it would be underage jpop idols and japanese p*rn all the way down. I even stumbled upon a man editing underage su into p*rn gifs. Obviously no proof of that but I did go find my initial reaction to it

The number of times I'd get a follow from someone then go to their blog and it would be as mentioned above or their bio would be the most misogynistic trash I'd ever read was staggering. I genuinely considered giving up and deleting this blog so many times bc i felt oberwhelmed and outnumbered by these gross old dudes; and so the fact that this fandom has evolved into a bunch of chaotic wlw?? Amazing, I could cry.

Fun phenomenon of women running bm blogs was men sending messages asking if we liked babymetal. No joke. I think this happened to me two or three times but I spoke w other female creators at the time and it had happened to them as well. My entire blog is babymetal, and yet???

He said the weird guy idk bc he sent some random ass messages vaguely insulting me and when I responded coldly, he acted confused so I said you're some guy idk, hence the above message starting as such. Also that pic and the one up above that has my current pfp bc I just took those screenshots. Like I said I typically blocked weird dms but I guess these passed me by so I still had the messages.

Most people know the sub reddit is the worst and don't need me to tell you but it's a hellscape and I highly recommend avoiding it. A short list of things I've had to see as a result of going there: men discussing at length kano and momoko's appearances and how they look in costume vs in normal clothes. Men discussing at length the hope that the girls would marry men who aren't Japanese, a thread that was from when all 3 girls were underage. They aren't gonna marry you dude they're really not.

The insulting of billie Eilish, a 17 year old at the time, was horrible too. Su and moa got to meet her, something they were extremely excited for, and they posted a pic; the comments were disgusting as you can imagine. The yui rumors were terrible too, fatshaming, slutshaming etc all based on nothing. Some man saying the rumors about yui leaving bc, no joke this was a real rumor, she "got too fat" couldn't be true bc "look at saya." Saya being a barely 18 yo back up dancer who covered the third spot after yui left but before the avengers. Not to mention the upskirt shots from when they were minors, the constant editing of their faces onto explicit photoshoots etc. I remember being a new fan looking for a su pic on google and being horrified at the fact that one of the top suggested results after her name was “bikini;” she was 16 at the time. Also, the uptick in massively creepy posts and messages sent to bm blogs as each girl, but esp moa and yui, approached 18 was disgusting.

Now for some personal nonsense. A big reason why I haven't touched my youtube channel in months is bc I got tired of dealing with the men of this fandom. I poke fun at metal and get told I deserve to die. I say ped*philes and creepy men are gross and get a swarm of middle aged men cursing at me. Had a guy cry about how men are shamed for liking bm and then he turned around and said some gross shit about wlw. Had a guy call me racist for liking a band he also likes (and despite him having no way of knowing my own race) and tell me the babymetal fandom doesn't need my kpop feminist bullshit, which is honestly a great description and I thought about putting it in my yt about lmao. Had a middle aged man unironically say he'd never seen a man be creepy towards bm but fans su and moa's ages calling them hot was creepy. The disillusionment....the level of unawareness is astounding. If you want to see screenshots of some of these comments they are fairly recent in my don't mind me tag; I don't want to see them anymore tho bc they're infuriating so I'm not going to look at them to post here.

Essentially I haven't looked at my channel since may bc men are exhausting and rude and refuse to examine the fandoms they're a part of no matter what. They're told by a woman of the fandom that she's had bad experiences personally and they all start crying about how it's either a lie bc they haven't seen it or unimportant. I did stop reading comments in may and I will never read another one again probably as a result of this shit. Trash men being trash are not worth my time and I refuse to give them anymore of it. I do plan on making more videos tho and let my ~feminist kpop bullshit~ live in their minds rent free.

I will also continue to make fun of metal and the creepy men in this fandom bc it's important and I'm a spiteful asshole who likes disrupting these dudes perfect bubble of a fandom. It genuinely brings me so much joy seeing all the new fans recently (which sidenote if you got into them recently I am kinda curious as to how you found them; I've gotten tons of new followers and considering how inactive they are rn I'm curious). People sending messages about how they finally feel like they belong or that they have a safe space....like I don't even know what to say and I never feel like my responses fully convey how genuinely wonderful that is and how thrilled I am that this is where we're at now and I have had at least some part in it. As this post shows, my experiences have been negative for the most part so the shift recently is such a relief I cannot even begin to explain my gratitude.

So to anyone who read all of this and hasn't disintegrated from the male bullshit, thank you. Keep being yourself and fighting for your place in this fandom, esp if you're a young woman; keep making fun of the creeps and keep making wlw memes!! Babymetal's music is in such a huge way meant for girls and to see more and more finding their way to this previously hellish beyond belief fandom is incredible.

[ziracona]

hey zira, what are your hot takes on all of the fo4 companions?

Haha, I don’t know how hot they are, but I can give you a speed run! (Also I am very excited to get this. FO4 was the first open world game I ever played and just the concept of that and the hugeness of the world and branching story & sudden feeling changes towards me in companion characters totally blew my mind, & it still lives rent free in my heart).

Ada, Old Longfellow, and Strong I /still/ haven’t maxed despite having too many hundred hours to want to list on this game—the former bc they were DLC, Strong because honest to god I left him at a nice settlement and then completely forgot about him and remembering that I am the energy in this Ryan O’Flanagan video but abt leaving my super mutant in a tiny settlement alone. I will get there! To max affinity I mean. But anyway, I don’t truly know those three, so my takes are incomplete. So far though, I really like Ada. She is a good girl just trying her best. Fucks me up I can tell her to self destruct. Even though I feel sure she would ignore me, I cannot imagine ever saying that to her. It was really sweet she was willing to forgive the Mechanist and move on with her life. A good girl. Longfellow I am maxing rn (was last time I played anyhow). I enjoy him. Gruff grumpy old man but he seems quite decent and I like his idle banter and when he sings to himself a lot. Seems like he’s had it rough. Strong I liked. He’s wild, and I loved how insane meeting him was, and am worried about him eventually understanding poetry and how that might mess up his sense of world understanding. But he’s a chill dude in his own way and I am glad they gave us at least one nice super mutant.

For the companions I actually do know like the back of my hand, the speedrun:

Nick Valentine: Best man on earth. One of two fictional characters I ever called husband. I would die kill or live for him. I want to be 1/4th the man Nick Valentine is. One of the best characters ever period and I adore literally everything about him. It fucked me up early in game where right after he offered to basically risk destroying his mind to help a stranger look for her son, he asked me how I was doing. First character in the entire game to do that. His first companion dialogue is abt how you’re doing TuT. The man is very kind and forgiving and fair, but knows when the draw the line and take no shit. Emotionally mature, kind, caring, longsuffering. Incredibly damaged and broken by life, but holding on and living kindly and to help others anyway. One of the four most marryablen fictional men I’ve ever seen.

Preston Garvey: Brave, kind, sweet man. I would defend him with my life. He really just wants so bad to make the world better and life has been so hard, but he’s still trying. A beautiful and underrated companion and I would throw hands for him on sight. I adore how he whistles. A true and gentle and loyal friend. Take him to Quincy and let him get his justice it’s what he deserves. People who hate him because he tries to get help helping civilians in that game are weak. I love him so much... please give him enough time to reach max affinity he’s so worth it.

Deacon: *To the tune of You Are My Dad* You are my friiiiend! You’re my friend! (Boogie woogie woogie). Initially, he pissed me off bc he lies all the god damn time, but after we got close enough he actually trusted me, he stole my heart and I would also die for Deacon. He’s a really good person who thinks he’s shit because of who he was on his past. Also him 🤝 Preston: massive survivor’s guilt. They should be friends. Poor Deacon has been the last member of the Railroad like four times, and it’s awful. Help him. Give him love and support. He’s one of my all time faves. Also, Railroad hands down best faction and if you kill them for any reason other than like a walkthrough route video and I ever get the chance I would 100% clock you in the face as hard as I can, like going for losing teeth, and feel no guilt. I know it’s a game and that’s wrong, and I’d be wrong, but I’d still do it. Also, Ryan Alosio (his VA) saw me do cosplay for Deacon once and told me it was great and it filled me with even more love. Anyway Deacon is great. Also, his whole “There are other organisations out there. And, in time, I'm sure they're going to spoon-feed you their own patented form of bullshit. Ignore the verbage and look at what they're doing. What they're asking you to do. What sort of world they'd have you build and how they're going to pay for it.” Is one of the like, two most iconic quotes in all of FO4 & just super good in general.

Hancock: Hardcore badass man but also a good dude and a champion for the people. Man really puts his money where his mouth is and you gotta respect that; another favorite companion for sure. Big fan of the way he stabs a guy for you upon meeting, and is a cool leader who organized his crime and does a decent job actually leading. He works hard to help people and bites back hard. Social justice advocate, dangerous man about town, not afraid to cosplay a revolutionary war hero 24/7 & u gotta respect the no fucks given attitude. A chill dude. Like that he fights the institute, hates the Brotherhood, helps the Railroad, and is friends with Nick. He’s legit af. Also, his VA gives a different answer every time someone asks him about the voice he did for hancock and they’re funny af.

Piper Wright: A cool spunky lady. Lois Lane on the case, kicking butt, and taking name. She’s nice but also hardcore and smart, supportive, fun. A good person. You always get points if you like Nick (which most companions do), and they’re good friends. She’s funny and I love her. A good heart.

Codsworth: He’s great. He’s family. He’s like my...weird brother. Getting to max affinity is heartwarming and also makes my heart go :’-] . Great early-game companion bc he kicks ass and doesn’t need stims to heal. I love getting called by my name and think that was a great feature (well, my PC’s name). He’s a wonderful funky little robot dude and I am so glad he likes me.

Dogmeat: Amazing. A good boy. Doggo of the year. His actor deserved the game award she won. Cute, full of love, and plays with a teddy bear if you give him one. 100/10z

Cait: I like her a lot. She’s been through so much shit, and it makes sense she is how she is. I like they actually gave her an emaciated and messy (though still pretty) design, since she is a drug addict. And that they make her main quest about taking that seriously and wanting to get help, and that she’ll call out the player if they fuck around and do drugs in front of her after she gets rehabilitated. Her relationship to the PC if good is really sweet, and I am a fan. I like that while she’s not sympathetic to synths and thinks they aren’t people, she forgets that every time Nick walks into a room and is like “Oh hey Nicky : )”. She’s a good girl who has been through a lot and still needs time to heal and find herself, but she’s making great strides.

Robert Joseph MacCready: Human disaster (loving). Homeboy a goddamn /mess/ but I love him. He tries so hard to be cool. I love he makes you pay him to come with, then chickens out and gives it back lol. A fool ball of anxiety and bad decisions and what he thinks brovado is. I wish he, Preston, and Deacon would quit fighting, bc I am always like “ :’-] </3 Boys Please” when they swap out, but I love them just the same. He’s doing his best, he’s just stupid and a fool. Like Philip J Fry. Keeping his goddamn soldier toy, which somehow is listed as junk instead of sent to Misc with quest items where it would be fine, safe?parylizes me with fear. I’ve lost 2 hours of gameplay reloading an old save bc I accidentally lost it.

X6-88: A more complex one to answer about. He’s bad, but like, I’m pretty sympathetic to how he got that way. He was created in a lab and had his emotions mostly dragged out of him in intense psychologically damaging training so he would be a weapon and view himself as an object. I was relieved he chose me over the institute even if he wasn’t a fan of the chocie, and think that means there’s a lot of hope for him. Wish he’d chill the fuck out and quit intimidating civilians for 6 god damn seconds, but I like him. I bring him fancy lad snack cakes home from travels all the time, bc Synths are supposed to like them. Really like that he’s the /most/ sympathetic companion towards Danse in Blind Betrayal, even though he should not be programmed for that, and Danse hated him and made it clear any time they interacted.

(EDIT) Curie: I FORGOT HER BABY IM SO SORRY. I like Curie a lot, despite the fact I temporarily forgot she existed. I stg I thought she was in here. Uhhh, okay. Curie: like her character and personality, HUGE un-fan of both the way her desire to get a synth body is to be ‘more real,’ as if Codsworth isn’t a fully realized person while the same robot type she is, instead of just like. Because it would make her happy. ALSO hate how much of a Born Sexy Yesterday she is, even intentionally in not-determinate affinity talks. It’s gross. But her herself, I like a lot. She’s my daughter and I will protect her. She works at The Castle right now as their on-site medic.

Paladin Danse: I know I’m gonna take heat for this but honestly? He didn’t do much for me. I like that he looks and sounds kinda like Buzz Lightyear, and that’s fun, but idk at all why people think he’s so hot. He’s very boring & generic looking to me. Like you’re valid! Taste all be different. But he doesn’t do it for me personally in looks or personality. I don’t at all like, hate him. Or even dislike. Tbh I am fairly neutral on him. It was funny making affinity with him though. Every other companion I had maxed, I liked more and more with each affinity talk. They’d be like “So my dad was a minuteman and died and I want to honor him” or “I just want to really feel like I’m a person, for real, myself, and I am glad I met you, because the good we have achieved together is ours, even if I can’t be sure of anything else,” or “My brother threw the cultural minorities out of our city for clout bc the rich citizens were all racist, and I tried to help—I snuck them food to the unsafe ruins they set up in for weeks, but eventually, they just vanished, and I still bear immense guilt and self-hatred over not having stopped that.” And Danae’s would be like “One time a buddy of mine got kidnapped by super mutants. They turned him into one of them, and they’re all abominations, so I killed him and it made me really sad.” And I was just like “...Oh danse. I really wanted to like you more. But what the fuck.” His relationship to Haylen is sweet though. And ofc I saved him in Blind Betrayal. I blew up the Prydwin so he’s safe now too, and he lives in the garden by my house and tells me how glad he is we’re friends, and I’m p into that. Overall, my feelings on him are not strong at all though.

Porter Gage: Not a fan. Like, I appreciated he helped me kill the old boss, sure. And bc I owed him for that, I went to max affinity to see what there was to him as a person. And like, as far as raiders go, he was okay. But he wasn’t deeply sympathetic, and he’s a slaver, and if you try to liberate the slaves he and the others own, he /will/ turn on and attempt to murder you immediately, no matter how close you were, so he made his choice, and it was to be a bad person and an asshole to the last. Really enjoyed the VA’s work a lot on him tho.

And there you have it 👈👈😎. Thanks for asking!

[path-of-my-childhood]

Taylor Swift’s “Beautiful Ghosts” might be the best part of the Cats movie

Vox // By Aja Romano // November 20th 2019

“Beautiful Ghosts,” the song that Taylor Swift put words to for Tom Hooper’s upcoming Cats movie, has arrived - and guess what? Swift might be Cats creator and famed Broadway composer Andrew Lloyd Webber’s ideal lyricist.

Lloyd Webber is the man who brought the world Phantom of the Opera, Jesus Christ Superstar, Evita, and one of the most recorded songs in theatre history, “Memory” from Cats. He is notorious for writing musicals with beautiful music and weak lyrics. But “Beautiful Ghosts” makes a compelling argument that what every ALW musical needs is a shrewd lyricist who was once a teenage girl - and who, consequently, is not embarrassed to embrace the gushy romantic heart of his music. Here are five reasons “Beautiful Ghosts” is worth a second listen, or several.

1) It adds to our understanding of Victoria, the White Cat. “Beautiful Ghosts” isn’t a showy end-credits pop song; it’s a new song inserted into the plot of the show. It will follow “Memory” in the upcoming film. The cat who sings it, Victoria has a bigger role: Now, the entire story is framed through her point of view, and Victoria is a younger mirror of Grizabella.

In “Beautiful Ghosts,” Victoria echoes “Memory” and reflects on Grizabella’s tragic life, as well as her own. “Memory” keeps calling for “new life,” while through “Beautiful Ghosts,” Victoria transitions from “Memory’s” sadness to a joy that’s all her own - through the realization that she loves the life she has. Where “Memory” is fuzzy, with vague hints of former happiness, “Beautiful Ghosts” weaves a mini-narrative of Victoria’s life: cast onto the streets, apparently by cruel former owners, she distrusts other cats, but eventually befriends them and comes to love her life. With this one song, she goes from being opaque and silent to having depth, complexity, and a backstory that doesn’t involve her being a sex object.

2) It helps us understand “Memory.” Even though “Beautiful Ghosts” is sung by Victoria to Grizabella, it also gives us crucial insight into Grizabella’s life. When Victoria sings lines like, “Should I take chances when no one took chances on me?” she’s simultaneously referencing her own life and Grizabella’s: Grizabella at least knew a time when she was loved and admired, and had human companionship to look back on. Victoria has only known rejection.

Taylor Swift has clearly asked herself, “How can I bring more coherence to “Memory,” a weird-ass song about a cat who is also a sex worker who is also dying and friendless and stuck with her memories of having once been very hot?” The solution, which she provides in “Beautiful Ghosts,” is to give Grizabella slightly more of a past.

In a recent radio interview, Swift described her approach to creating the song - which involved contrasting Victoria’s life with Grizabella’s: ‘Memory’ is Grizabella singing about how she had all these beautiful, incredible moments in her past. She had these glittering occasions and she felt beautiful and she felt wanted and now she doesn’t feel that way anymore.’ This is fanfic on Swift’s part. While this glittering history can be implied, it’s not literally in the lyrics to “Memory,“ or anywhere else in Cats - the most concrete detail “Memory” offers is that Grizabella once enjoyed “days in the sun.” It’s a huge bonus to see Grizabella given a more concrete backstory that has nothing to do with her, uh, hanging out in brothels.

“Beautiful Ghosts” explains that Grizabella was “born into nothing” but now has memories of “dazzling rooms” and a time she was not just beautiful, but loved. In essence, Swift has not only crafted a satisfying character song for Victoria - she’s deepened Grizabella and “Memory” too.

3) It’s clearly a song that could be sung by a cat. This is hard! “Memory” couldn’t manage it and from the first line of “Beautiful Ghosts,” the song feels like one that could be sung by a cat - one who has wandered the streets, hearing the voices of its fellow cats in the dark. Victoria sings of the “wild ones” who “tame the fear” within her as she longs to “get let into” the rooms inhabited by the humans she once knew and yearned for love from. These are bittersweet lyrics, but more importantly, they’re lyrics that pretty clearly describe the life of a cat.

The extent to which Swift has thought about how cats feel becomes increasingly apparent when you realize that “Beautiful Ghosts” is a hymn to found family and the alley cat existence, the freedom of a life lived on the streets, and the beauty of, well, a gang of stray cats. (This may also sound like a metaphor for marginalized communities finding strength in each other after being turned out of their homes.)

4) It hints at what a new Andrew Lloyd Webber musical could be like with a smart lyricist who embraces his romanticism. The typical trade-off with Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals is that his lush, lofty melodic lines take priority over lyrics. The general wisdom among musical theater fans is that ALW was only truly great when he was composing with his earliest collaborator, the brilliant lyricist Tim Rice. The ALW/Rice shows (Jesus Christ Superstar, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Evita) are fantastic - witty, satirical, and incisive, ranging from complex political themes to rollicking whimsy and charming pastiche.

ALW’s later shows’ scores were often gorgeous, full of beautiful melodies. But the plots were often too soapy, and he bounced around between lyricists who frequently paired his music with asinine words. When ALW was working with someone equally as or more talented than he was, he managed to create popular, lasting shows, including Cats and Phantom of the Opera. But ALW didn’t always work with equals who could rein him in. And so he only kept getting more extravagant in his desire to combine deeply emotional musical motifs with schmoopy, overblown storylines. In other words, post-Rice, ALW has always been hampered by his own self-indulgence and the lack of a lyricist as good at writing lyrics as ALW is at writing music.

That’s why a Taylor Swift-ALW collaboration is genuinely exciting. In the annals of ALW collaborators, Swift may be the first lyricist with the range, experience, and stature to stand alongside Rice. But more importantly, she clearly loves Cats, loves the music, and loves actual cats. In that interview quoted above, for example, she discussed Victoria’s cat psychology at length. I cannot imagine any circumstances in which Tim Rice would say, as Swift did in that interview, “I got you. I know what that cat would say.”

And that may be what so many previous ALW musicals have lacked: the enthusiasm of a smart, savvy songwriter who’s also not afraid to unironically love and embrace her subject matter. Taylor Swift isn’t just a brilliant songwriter who credits the lyrics of Fall Out Boy’s Pete Wentz for teaching her to write music with sharp edges and blatant emotive power. She’s also a fangirl. And fangirls know how to deliver deep, smart character studies while amplifying the emotional core of the stories they love. That combination of shrewd songwriting and passion is what propels the final verse of “Beautiful Ghosts” into something truly great.

5) “Beautiful Ghosts” has a surprise twist ending. Taylor Swift learned a lot from brilliant country songwriters, and one of the common country song traits she likes to carry forward is the “twist.” That’s when the final stanza upends the original meaning of the song and shifts the refrain into something new, surprising, and even richer. Throughout “Beautiful Ghosts,” Victoria has emphasized the fact that Grizabella still has her memories: “at least you have beautiful ghosts,” she sings, and the ghosts are the memories of Grizabella’s life of being beautiful and adored.

By contrast, Victoria herself has always lived on the streets, eventually taken in by the stray cats she eventually began to see as family. Initially, she describes the strays as voices she can only hear in the dark, while she wanders the streets, “alone and haunted.” Later, they become “phantoms of night,” as they lure her into her new exciting life. Finally, when Victoria has her epiphany that she’s happy with her friends, and she loves her alleycat life, she shifts from singing enviously to Grizabella about the “beautiful ghosts” of her memories. Instead, she sings, “So I’ll dance with these beautiful ghosts.”

The ghosts at the end of the song are the cats! Victoria’s ghosts are flesh and blood, and also have you ever met a cat, cats are clearly ghosts, with their silent paws and their eerie glow-eyes, and their ability to vanish into thin air. (Holy shit, the ghosts are the cats!) Only Taylor Swift could turn a metaphor about lost memories into a literal description of cats that is also a metaphor for found families and friendship. Don’t argue with me, this is perfect.

[isabeladraws]

this took longer than i wanted to, hopefully you don’t mind! i wanted to make a big thread of random thoughts that came into my head. i decided to answer this way so i can put a cut and people don’t have to read this ridiculously long post!

sunday and beckett pregnancy hcs 🌷👶✨

beckett knows sunday is pregnant before herself. during her period week he knows her mood changes and how horny she sometimes can be. her period is very regular and he knows what to expect and how to comfort her during it. but, it never came. he was busy himself and didn’t realise it until that time of the month was well past them.

“sunday, is everything alright with… you know.. your period?”

“what do you mean?”

“it’s late. your period is never late”

“i think it might be from stress of the games. it’s been madness!”

beckett didn’t seem reassured but he let it go. she knows her body better than he ever could. sunday however was starting to have doubts so she buys a pregnancy test and wouldn’t you freaking know it… it’s positive.

beckett knows when sunday looks at him after she takes that test. he doesn’t even have to see it to believe when she says “you were right… i’m pregant, b”

he hugs her like never before, lifting her off the ground, swaying her in his arms. beckett cries a little, sunday does too. the shock is so big, it wasn’t planned but at the same time, very wanted.

“only beckett harrington to figure out when a girl’s period is late”

“hey, it’s a great few days for said beckett harrington”

“well, too bad they won’t be happening for a while”

“i wouldn’t change a thing, sunday. i love you”

“i love you t- WHAT IF IT’S TWINS BECKETT????!! we cannot handle two babies at once, can we?? omg mom is going to freak out, and atlas… we’re gonna be PARENTS! BECKETT WHY ARE YOU SMILING, YOU NEED TO FREAK OUT WITH ME!!”

they only tell atlas and shreya during the first trimester. sunday knew atlas wouldn’t be able to keep the secret from shreya and shreya would figure it out in 10 minutes anyway. they’re happy to have someone to talk to about it.

it’s the 6 week apointment, sunday had only had a blood test to confirm the pregnancy and passed with flying colors. beckett was with her of course and they were excited to see baby.

the doctor found one baby and they smiled, everything looked healthy and 10 seconds later the doctor is like oh looks like there’s two! oh my mistake, there are three babies in there!

beckett didn’t faint because he was already sitting down. sunday saw her life flash before her eyes.

“what?” said both of them

“yeap, three heartbeats, it’s too early to tell if they might be identical or not”

“are you absolutely sure, doctor?” asked beckett

and the doctor showed them in the ultrassoung machine, three black voids filled with a white dot each and their pulsing hearts. they were having triplets.

i believe pregnancy with multiples need to monitored way more often than ones with just one baby so regular appts for these two. beckett hates missing them but they’re both busy

beckett would still be studying and working freelance (i still have no concrete idea what his job would be, maybe something with writing/research?)

sunday is told to slow things down so she takes a break from the team before quitting altogether 

i haven’t decided on the triplets birthday yet but i’m leaning torwards scorpio/sagittarius season (maybe aries season too?)

beckett and sunday still travel quite a bit 

sunday feels pretty great for the most part, i think the hardest part of her pregnancy is towards the end

beck really wanted to take a photo of sunday each week and see the growth of their babies;  he made a whole album with his thoughts and hopes for their family and gave it to sunday after the babies were born

they travelled to quite a few places during the 9 months, maybe 6 to 7 different locations. sunday being at home more and feeling pretty good during the 2nd trimester they took a few roadtrips to places close to them

atlas and shreya moved out of their shared apt so beckett moved in with sunday right before they found out they were pregnant

i don’t know if they’d be married at this point in time or not

they would have been living together before getting pregnant, sunday would spend most of her time at beckett’s place but she wasn’t “officially” moved in because she travelled quite a bit due to thief and the games 

to me, for some reason, their lives seem hectic and busy af after graduating, everything happens at once for them

getting signed with a thief team, beckett getting acknowledged for his skills and scoring independent jobs and working on his masters, sunday is travelling all the time

i feel like beckett one day, in the midst of all the business, while they were still half asleep in bed was just like “marry me” and sunday thought she was actually dreaming. there was no way this boy was asking her to marry him right now 

“what” she kinda giggled “marry me” he sounded so serious she woke up and sit up

they stayed in silence just staring at each other for a while until they started smilling and the thought really sank in, it was barely morning 

“sunday, marry me” 

“i think i’ll need to hear that again a few more times”

did they elope later that afternoon?? WHO KNOWS 

back to your scheduled programming of pregnancy with triplets:

sunday got real swolen, painfully swolen at some point in time. 

weird cravings of butternut squash everything. beckett became quite good at using it in a variety of recipes

sunday really missed her job during her pregnancy and felt quite lost. she felt her only purpose was to carry these kids around and moan back pain every 5 minutes. 

but she also realised she didn’t want to do thief after becoming a mother. that chapter felt like it was closing for her and she needed to take a step foward into a new career path (i have yet to figure it out)

very cranky and moody sunday. she also hated getting advice from her mom on her pregnancy. it would just annoy her

atlas got real good at getting these two away from each other

god atlas as an AUNT wow

she really started to fear sunday at the end of her pregnancy like... the look sunday would give when she was pissed off ... oof 

atlas and beckett are the only ones sunday wanted with her when it was delivery time

i imagined it was most likely a c-section? would there be more “innovative” ways in the magick world to give birth?? 

moving on that’s not important

beckett studies pregnancy yoga intensely so he can teach sunday

tmi.. or nsfw... sex is pretty fun 

sunday thinks it will be 2 girls and one boy, the girls being identical 

beckett thinks it’s 3 girls

they restored their baby blanket atlas found and used it in the nursery

sunday and beckett did not find out the sexes of the babies until birth

(it was a bet. sunday was actually the one that was DYING to find out and lost)

shreya was the only one that guessed correctly (2 boys 1 girl) 

bougie ass baby gifts from shreya. special one of a kind super gentle lotion, shampoo. baby shoes, oils and butters for stretch marks, blankets with their names on it, literally you name it

there’s something about baths... sunday would never take them but it became nighttime ritual at some point

beckett is very aware of people’s names now that he has to name 3 kids and is VERY opinionated 

he even starts to question his name, sunday’s name, everyone else around him “you have a such a weird name sunday, what was theia thinking” “COME SAY THAT TO YOUR PREGNANT WIFE’S FACE, HARRINGTON”

sunday needs to pull a break on that for a while so they stop throwing name ideas for a few weeks 

they agree on marlow first, sunday suggests it and beckett isn’t much of a fan until he finds himself using it in his head. when he sees his baby boy he knows it’s his name 

they had one unexpected visit from the sources to congratulate sunday and beckett on the pregnancy and marriage. i’m pretty sure gemma called selene’s wood attunement.

sunday does not want anyone touching her belly but she’s kinda anxious about it so atlas is always ready to fight somebody’s hand off

god can u imagine these sisters coming this far in their lives, sunday is going to be a mother, atlas an aunt how happy atlas is to be able to see a future she thought would be lost after so many years of running from raife and the heartache and loss. I AM EMOTIONAL. 

doting aunt atlas like she SPOILS these kids to death

katrina might have a kid of her own at this point in time, since she’s older than beckett? sunday would appreciate her advice way more in comparision to her mother’s. (i could also see katrina not wanting kids but i don’t know if she has hinted either way)

beckett’s family has been a bit harsh when it comes to sunday’s job but she wins everyone over eventually so they do find themselves falling in love with her. they find sunday so warm and kind and easy to talk to. his parents are so happy to be grandparents of three kids no less, and are prepared to spoil them to bits. 

i can see her with the harringtons spending the summer together, his mother talking about when beckett was a baby himself which seemed not that long ago. 

the boys share a room in their grandparent’s house while selene has one of her own once they’re about 5/6 years old. while they’re toddlers, they do sleep in the same room together. 

they really do dote on these kids. beckett has never seen them this affectionate before in his life. 

beckett’s father and jett bond very nicely. both are a fan of sports. 

zeph and griff give sunday and beck so many delicious homecooked meals they can freeze for after birth but also to eat whenever they want. 

zeph got the tendency of showing up like “my abuela cooked extra this week so i thought i’d give you some for dinner”

they do not complain once. the meals are delicious

zeph really enjoys babysitting the kiddos, especially as they get a bit older and start to waddle around, speaking gibberish you understand but not really. the kids are really impressed by his water tricks. bath time is a mess (with him and in general tbh)

beckett and sunday have one big fight during the pregnancy. sunday is feeling lost and weird about her career, job, path in general and beckett always has something to say instead of just listening which frustrates them both. they fight all day the first time but can’t go to sleep angry so they talk it out during the night. neither of them has much sleep but they settle things down, beckett just listens and explains where he came from, apolagizes, sunday too, they figure it out in the end. this comes up again but sunday just points it out to him what he’s doing and he’s like “my bad, babe”. 

sunday eats pretty much plant-based during the pregnancy apart from having a few eggs here and there. she has this aversion of meat, it sounds disgusting to her (marlow’s influence?) 

beckett sings to the babies a lot, sunday falls asleep to it often

i can see beckett having choir lessons when he was younger and actually being a pretty good vocalist

atlas buys baby things ALL THE TIME. goes jogging, sees a random store “oh sunday i found this dumb ass onesie, here” “i saw this arylu plushie and thought the kids would like it” “this muslin cloth has cat butts on it, let me get that 1 for each kid” sunday literally doesn’t need to buy anything because everyone is buying them baby stuff 24/7 

shreya planned the baby shower where they basically just asked for diappers and ended up with high-tech baby stuff, beckett was actually pretty intrigued by some of them

massages. everyone that goes into that apt just sees beckett rubbing some lotion on sunday and massaging some area in her body, feet, back, legs. towards the end it’s a must if sunday wants to walk around for more than 20 minutes without being in pain.

if you finished reading this, congratulations! here, have a 🍄.

this is already so freaking long and even though i feel like i could get some more hc’s going i’m gonna stop here and save any that i find important for another post. let me know what you guys think and don’t mind the typos too much  I’M SICK🙈

[nad-zeta]

Matchup Duo 💎

HOWDY, not sure if matchups for ikeseng are open but here i go anyway?¿ ´･ᴗ･`

-I’m a Leo, and a combination of ENFP/ENTP (if that helps with characterization), but I’m becoming more ambivert as the days go by. But I still act like a crackhead (making up new words, making random sound effects out of boredom and roasting people playfully, having airhead moments, for examples) and a lot of people irl do get put off at how “obnoxious” I can get, but I do know when to “flip the switch” and become serious/quiet.

-I have really low standards for humor idk I laugh at my own jokes it’s honestly astounding, but cursed memes/images are somethin else💀 Dark jokes are always open in my ally👀

-Ironically, I canNOT stand horror, I will legit be so paranoid or freaked out and start overthinking and just cry and DIE—

I’m very open, almost TOO open, but ask me literally anything and I’ll usually tell everyone my honest opinions/thoughts, but I know how to deliver words tactfully and articulately. Debating, (public) speaking, writing, and understanding concepts are my strong suits; likewise I suck ass at math (I have no idea how I ended up in Calc BC ap, I just— 😭)

-Speaking of writing, I write poems whenever I feel like it, I have a whole collection HAH. My love of expressing comes from my tendency to play the devil’s advocate in interpreting and arguing for almost all perspectives in topics. So you can probably guess how I don’t get offended really easily and welcome both playful and serious banter (despite the crackhead persona, I’m very observant of people and their values expressed and how they tick, so I know when to back off especially when they get uncomfortable with my aggressive debating/personality). Need advice? I can use what I’ve gathered from different people and help anyone in their particular situations.

-And speaking of expression, I love fashion and makeup! I love being able to express myself through use of presentation and have fun while doing it! hehe (k-fashion, asian beauty 👀) HECK YEAH I’M DOWN FOR SHOPPING—

-I like to dance yeehaw, and I was on a competitive dance team (well that was before when the corona hit the milly rock a little TOO hard and put all the dancers out of commission😔🤝😭) I’ve also been in my own highschool’s dance club for 4 years!!

-I’m a console gamer :0 Big fan of winding down with video games, but books are the best if games aren’t an option.

-Music is a huge part of my life; I played the flute and the viola for years before and been surrounded by music through dancing as well; while I’ve been in a choir before, my vocals aren’t stellar oof, but at least I’m not tone-deaf.

-Can’t cook to save a life ooooof, that’s where my airheadness REALLY kicks in. I literally burn myself making instant :>

-I’m not phased by sexual innuendos/conversations/kinks because I see them objectively as unique characteristics of every person, but I’ll crack up at a sex joke or a cringe flirt line with friends. And like I’ve said, I’ll share them myself without objection if ANYONE asks. But the moment someone actually TRIES to make a move on me (like what!!¡¿), I’ll first play it casual but then bolt for the door because it’s hard for me to actually imagine that ANY guy would see me in a romantic light LOL but i’d get used to the advances quick and if it’s someone i liked back, i’d tease them the same or raise up the antics ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ

Hi, there, dear! <3 Can I just say u sound like a super cool person! Anyway here is your matchup dear, I hope you enjoy it! And thanks for waiting soooooooooo long! ^_^

So I match you with………… Masamune

Selfie Match up

The first time this boi meets you he is ecstatic, finally someone fun to liven up this boring place.

You scream fun and outgoing

Masamune is already imagining all the fun adventures the two of you can go on and he hasn’t even talked to you yet!

He is absolutely captivated by those big dark brown eyes. 

Those big bright intelligent eyes are all telling of the playful mischief the two of you could get up to together.

He absolutely loses himself in your deep warm, captivating eyes, they remind him of home, they are deep and rich like the soil of his home town, soft and comforting, while busting with endless life and energy

HE is absolutely dazzled by the way your soft strands of earthy hair moved so freely in the wind. It low key reminds him of his own wild free personality

If he ever had to imagine his perfect woman you would be it.

You have the same vibe as playful kitten having endless hours of fun, and boy oh boy all Masa wants to do is join in.

He wishes nothing more than to boop your cute nose

His brain goes haywire, all he wants to do is kiss those soft lips of yours

Masamune continues to eye you from the corner of the council room. Gosh if love at first sight did exist than this would describe his exact feelings towards you.

Match up part

You were named as the new princess of the Oda forces and was forced to sit through the rest of the boring war council. It had been 30 minutes in, and you were already losing your mind from boredom, that is when the one-eyed dragon passed you note from across the table. You giggled a little at the joke and wrote back on of your own. The two of you passed notes back and forth, every joke or remark you read made you want to break out in laughter. As the council progressed, the two of you got rowdier and rowdier and the both of you were now making strange noises. You were making all sorts of weird sound effects, and Masamune was howling in laughter. TBH they were so funny even Nobunaga couldn’t help but laugh. Everyone was having a good time except Hideyoshi “Okay that’s the third time the two of you have disturbed the council”. Hideyoshi started lecturing you and Masamune about not disturbing the council any further when Nobunaga announced that the council was over. The two of you couldn’t help but laugh in victory. The two of you continued your conversation in which you were playfully roasting each other. Masamune was right; you really were going to be a lot of fun.

Masa love chatting and spending time with you and honestly, he loved the fact that you understood and laughed at all his jokes. What he loves the most is times just before your about to deliver the punch line to a joke, but you burst out laughing for 20 minutes before you can even get it out. And once you finally coke out the punchline between laughs, you continue to giggle at your hilarious sense of humour for another solid 30 minutes. Masamune can’t help but laugh at you laughing at yourself. When the two of you goofballs are around its always a fun time, but beware of some occasional dark humour i.e. the two of you got scolded one day for joking about some dark topics in front of the kids *cough* Mitsunari *cough*

The first night you arrived, and Masamune barged into your room, and Masamune being Masamune, ignored any boundaries of personal space and started to page through one of your books that were laying on your writing desk. It was your fashion portfolio that caught his eye. He loves all the different looks and the way the colours and patterns seemed to complement each other. You had explained to him that you were heavily into fashion and makeup and considered it as part of your self-expression. Masamune smiled his big cat-like smile at you asking if you wanted to meet up with him tomorrow. You honestly didn’t have anything better to do, so you agreed.

You and Masamune spent hours in the market looking at different fabrics, clothes and makeup products. Everything was so different in the past. After spending the whole day shopping your grab both of Masamune’s hands in your, you beam up at his with the brightest smile stating that you had a fun idea. Masa is pretty much keen for anything, so he goes along with your strange idea. The two of you make your way back to his manor. And that is when the two of you hold a fashion show, to show off your new clothes and accessories the two of you bought. It was a lighthearted fun game, filled with banter and giggles. It had actually become somewhat of a tradition now for the two of you to do this little fashion shows in his room after a long day of shopping. You would always bust out laughing at the strange poses Masamune would do. 

Another fun activity the two of you have adopted is poetry slams. Both of you would spend the week writing your best poems and then present them to each other. Just like the fashion shows, these evenings are also always filled to the brim with laugher and banter. The two of you had gotten to know each other fairly well like this, as sometimes the theme of the poems would be dark and depressing, and after the two of you would discuss the emotions behind it. U guys would in those cases always be there for each other lending a friendly ear to listen to the others problems.

Needless to say at this point, Masamune was head over heels for you and somewhere in between the fun poetry slams and fashion shows, his flirty jokes stopped being jokes. He was serious about you. One night he actually kissed you, you were honestly so shook, you ran, you legit sprinted away. Little did you know the tiger was on your heel running after you. He caught you and tacked you to the ground. The 30 second run actually gave you time to sort your feelings, as you too had realized that you had also fallen for the one-eyed dragon. He stared into your eyes questioningly, and that’s when you snaked your hands behind his neck and pulled him down to return the kiss.

The two of you made such a sweet couple. After work, Masamune would always be on the hunt for his kitten to spend time with you. He was super shocked when he heard singing coming from the kitchen. He snuck up to the kitchen and peeked inside. He had to chuckle when he saw you singing your heart out and dancing like nobody was watching. He never knew you could sing and dance like that, he watched you for a while utterly awestruck by you. He was pulled out of his reverie when he smelt something burning and saw a cloud of smoke coming from the oven. You panicked at seeing the smoke and swiftly opened the oven. You didn’t even think when you took the baked, well-burnt goods out the oven without mitts or a cloth. You had legit burnt your hands to a crisp. 

Masamune rushed to your side to evaluate the damage. He got a bag and filled it with ice, putting it on your burnt hands. He then proceeded to rub some medicine on the burns and wrap your hands “Best leave the cooking to me from now on Kitten”. He then took over from where you left off, making you the best meal you had ever tasted. You sat on the kitchen counter to keep him company. The burnt buns and your burnt hands were long forgotten, as the two of you were laughing and chatting away. 

Now, whenever Masamune cooked, you would sit in the kitchen with him and keep him company. The two of you would laugh and dance together in the kitchen. It was always so much fun spending time with him, you especially love it when he sings in his most false off-key voice it is honestly hilarious. You couldn’t help but think he complimented you perfectly. He could cook when you couldn’t even make toast successfully, and you could sing beautifully, while he sounded like some cat in pain.

Another thing Masa absolutely loves, is to sit and listen to you play the flute or viola. The soothing music and the amount of love and emotion you pack into the songs as you play, washes away all the stress and tiredness from his day. He could sit four hours and hours just enchanted by the sound of your music. Even more so if you sing along to the song, you are playing. He loves hearing your beautiful voice. This boy will legit drag you to sit in his lap and nuzzle and kiss you until you agree to play or sing him a song.

Masamune is always by your side supporting you and showering you with love. Whenever you get sad or insecure, Masamune is always there to lighten the mood. Like one time, some maids pissed you off. “ why is my kitten so angry today” Masamune literally came up to you and pinched your cheeks, he then squished your face “Common lemi see that beautiful smile.” When you still had a grumpy expression, he pulled you up and started spontaneously dancing. You couldn’t help but smile at the goofball and join in. Soon your big wide fast movements slowed down, and Masamune pulled you into his arms by your waist. He then dropped his head down and rested it in the crook of your neck. You honestly love quite moments like this just slow dancing in your lover’s arms. He would ask you about your day and would tighten his hold on you, enveloping you in a warm embrace, while you talk out all your frustrations of the day. After he would nibble on your ear whispering how much he loves and adores you.

Masa is like your fun knight in shining armour whether it is comforting you and helping you get to sleep after hearing some crazy scary ghost stories or spending hours upon hours bantering with you while you playfully insult each other, He is always there for you, loving you from the moment the sun rises till the moment it sets. He has truly met his match with you and never has in his life been happier, or laughed so much. The two of you can always be found snuggled together with Masa’s lil tiger cub in the futon after a long day of laughs, fun and adventures

Perhaps it truly was love at first sight after all 

Other potential matches…………….Mitsuhide 

 Hope you enjoyed it, love! and I hope you are staying safe and well🍭 @smol-vy

[svmmerdays]

( 01 / muse 2 / cis male & he/him ) contrary to what the campers might tell you, that’s not timothee chalamet. that’s kc thain! this is their 6th year working here and they’re a counselor. they’re 23, and i just found out during ice breakers they’re a sagittarius. at first they might seem pretty oblivious, but they’re actually really creative. when they have down time, you can usually catch them getting high on the roof. try to get to know them for yourself this summer!

MEET THE MUN.  i expect i’ll be able to solve a lot of my problems once my baby brain falls out & my adult brain grows in

hello all, my name is pepper and i have never been on time for anything in my life skjsdkj i feel like all my intros start that way but it’s simply a fact, i cannot tell time. that said i just got off from work so !!! this time i have a bit of an excuse. but omg Anyways, i am v excited for this rp, like i’ve already said in the gc,,, your girls never been to camp so i am LIVING FOR THIS! a bit about me ~cAmP tHEMED~ kinda, i have never actually gone camping but i really wanna go glamping one time so hit me up if you’re interested, whenever i am in the wilderness bugs like to try to fly directly into my eyes and idk why although i do have a theory i was an exterminator in a past life or something and now they’re getting their revenge for the their fallen ancestors yk?? i hate marshmallows because when i was like six some girl told me that gelatin was made of horse hooves and i believed her and i have not really eaten a marshmallow since with the exception of the one time i microwaved a smore in my microwave when i was like eight? but then again when i was really young i used to think god looked like king triton so i’m a gullible hoe y’all i’ll believe anything. but okay i think that’s enough, moving on to the man of the hour, kronk child thain!

BIO. what do people do when they’re not stoned?  drug tw !

 kc was an accident. and honestly, he was probably a bit too aware of that way too early. to start, when kc was conceived kc’s father was married to his mother’s best friend. and well, that’s not usually the kind of thing that you do on purpose. furthermore kc was conceived in a bounce house at his half older brother’s first birthday party. again, not the kind of thing you plan. you might ask how and why kc knows this information, and that would be the third reason why kc knows with absolute surety he was an accident. because his mother has been telling him all of this frankly intimate and scarring information with absolutely no shame pretty much from the moment kc could comprehend the words coming out of her mouth, and honestly likely before that. and well, that isn’t exactly the behavior of a woman who planned to have kids is it. at least not in kc’s mind. 

frankly moira thain has been treating kc like more than a pet than a son pretty much from the moment kc can remember. she didn’t treat him badly by any means. she just wasn’t really a mom. she was a weird older friend who whined until kc made her breakfast and left for days on end to go to music festivals. she was the kind of friend who teased you ruthlessly rather than offering any good advice and embarrassed you just for fun. the kind of friend who shrugged when you asked them for help with your homework and who none of your other friends (or their parents) really liked. honestly, she was kind of a bad friend if kc was honest but he doesn’t know what else to compare her to. for a long, long time his mother, as unusual as she was, was all he had. that was until kc was about seven and he didn’t even have that anymore. 

when kc was seven a lot of shit went down at once. to start, his mother nearly overdosed, and that was the big thing. it was a traumatizing experience overall as that kind of thing would be for a seven year old, but kc would like to think he handled it like a champ. called the police, made sure his mother didn’t choke on her own vomit, and all that. but CPS was called and kc was promptly shipped out to live with a father had never met, which went as well as could be expected (refer to how and when kc was conceived above). kc stayed with them for all of six months, but well, all kc really had to do was breathe to completely ruin their marriage. even if kace was a bit dull at times even he understood that. so he wasn’t surprised when 'the boys trip’ his father took him on ended up just being a complicated ruse to dump him at his grandfather’s house for as long as he could get away with. considering it was near the end of the school year, it was a while.

now at that point as you can imagine kc was pretty drained emotionally. his mother was officially in rehab. his dad didn’t want him around. his stepmother and half siblings treated him like some kind of leper. and all of this happened within less than a year. that’s a lot for anyone to take let alone a seven year old. little kc was filled to the brim with a lot of emotions he didn’t know what to do with so for the most part he had shut down. barely spoke unless spoken to. very rarely smiled or expressed any sort of emotion really. his grandfather played a big part in fixing that. 

grandpa thain lived in a cottage in the forest and worked for a camp not too far from his cabin. he dealt with the upkeep of the grounds during the school year as well as some handyman duties when needed. and for the most part he dragged his grandson along with him as his ‘assistant’. which mostly meant that kc pulled out the weeds his grandfather told him to or passed him the tools he asked for. just simple things like that. but to kc’s surprise he really liked it. he also really liked living with his grandfather in the middle of nowhere and being able to hear the birds in the morning or take naps in fields. 

kc’s father paid for his first summer at dagwood. his half siblings came to the camp as well, in fact they had been coming longer than kc had. however, at the end of the summer, unlike his eager half siblings, kc didn’t want to leave again. dagwood had become this safe have for him of sorts, a place where he was slowly able to heal at his own pace, and he knew the moment he went back to his father’s house he would be returning to an environment he was unwanted. his grandfather made it so he didn’t have to return at all by offering to take kc in permanently. 

it took some time and a lot of legal paperwork but kc’s grandfather ended up becoming his legal guardian. his grandfather home schooled him to the best of his capability during the school year, and during the summer’s kc attended camp dagwood and helped out his grandfather in whatever way he could. he continued to do so even after he turned eighteen, even going as far as to help out in between the online art school classes that he decided to take on a whim. his grandfather regretfully had to retire from dagwood, after working every day since the camps opening day. he retired with a lot of pride and kc is really proud of him honestly, and he has every plan to take his grandfather’s place once he gets promoted from counsellor. his grandfather insists that he doesn’t need to, and that he wants kc to do whatever he wants to do but kc is too stubborn and loyal to hear any of it. he’s determined to continue the legacy his grandfather is so proud of, and stay at the place that brought him so much comfort and peace, even though honestly it’s probably not the best thing for him. it’s honestly probably time for kc to move on to bigger and better things but he hasn’t realized that yet so until then, dagwood it is. 

PERSONALITY. me as a hotel receptionist: *greets guests by playing hotel california but cutting it off right before they say california*

LOYAL. listen if you’re kc’s friend he would die for you and that’s just a fact. he is honestly loyal to fault. he will screw himself over for his friends because he’s dumb. theyt won’t even ask him to do it! he’ll do it anyways! he’s a fool 

STUBBORN. not in an obvious way like generally kc is very flexible, go with the flow? will generally not hold an opinion in most arguments and is pretty happy to follow rather than lead. but when it comes to things that kc is passionate about?? oof. a bulldozer couldn’t move him. he’s a pain in the ass.

OBLIVIOUS. he’s a fool. kc will be the last one to know about his own damn feelings. kc will be the last one to know about anyone else’ feelings too. it could be so obvious. SO SO DAMN OBVIOUS, and yet kc??? has no idea. he’s that scene from juno where juno’s like ‘i like you’ and michael cera’s like ‘as a friend?’ jkdsdjk

CREATIVE. the only thing kc’s good at is creating things. he can make pretty much anything if he puts his mind to it. probably makes his own clothes honestly. can mend and repair yours. just as a weird brain tbh, if you ever want a different perspective on something go to kc because he’ll say something so wild sdjkdfkj 

COMPASSIONATE. a kind boy tbh. wouldn’t hurt a fly. catches spiders in his hands and takes them outside. is a vegetarian. will listen to your problems any time and at least offer help even if he has no idea what to do. 

LAZY. will fall asleep standing up with his eyes open. has fallen asleep on buses and ended up in different states. is terrible when it comes to getting up in the morning. eats his breakfast half asleep every day. like he’s a hard worker when it comes down to it, but if the options are playing with the campers or taking a nap in a warm patch of sun kc knows what he’s choosing... honestly kc is good with little kids but he would vastly prefer his grandfathers job, cause his gramps just worked by himself for the most part, and working with kids is so much more exhausting rip. 

HEADCANNONS. you’re in her dms im daydreaming about her on public transport we are not the same. 

loves all branches of art honestly, is also a big fan of music. can play the guitar, the drums and bass, all skills he mostly picked up on his own while being home schooled by his grandfather. tends to be rather humble about it but he’s actually pretty talented. will play the acoustic guitar by the campfire, is one hundred percent that guy 

when doing art activity counselling kc has the energy of that one pottery guy from tiktok always. like that’s kc straight up. 

has a bunch of tattoos that are mostly doodles that he made himself, sometimes doodles his friends have made too if he likes them enough. will put pretty much anything on body and tends to think of it as his canvas. wants to be that old man covered head to toe in tats by the time he’s ninety. 

has been stung by wasps on fourteen different occasions over the years. literally kc has been stung every summer since he’s come here and it’s pretty much tradition at this point. like he hates it, but if too long goes by without him being stung he starts to get paranoid. 

loves to climb things like trees and buildings. chills out in the branches/on top of roofs a LOT. would be the guy to fall asleep in a hammock and get a mustache drawn on his face by the campers. honestly that has probably happened. 

jewish! kc’s religion wasn’t really a big part of his life when he was living with his mother but by the time he moved in with his grandfather that changed. they go to the synagogue together and everything even if it’s a bit out of the way. 

might be narcoleptic honestly. is sleeping 99% of the time. if you don’t know where kc is check his bed tbh

will never tell anyone what kc stands for honestly, he thinks it’s amusing for people to guess. will answer to any version of k____ c____ you call him though. also accepts kace which is just a nickname for a pair of initials but skjsdm still he will answer to it 

a hard worker even if he doesn’t look it. weirdly functional while working high? kc is one of those people who you never know is high cause he just acts as he normally does for the most part. 

that said he is the most focused and like alert when drawing or painting or doing anything with his hands. takes his art incredibly seriously. has probably drawn up a mural for the camp, and literally stayed up three days and three nights to do it. very talented but doesn’t really think he’s talented enough to do anything with it? could get into art school if he tried, but he’s too loyal to ever leave his grandfather or the camp behind to do it. 

very good at wood working surprisingly. this boy will make you a sexy ass chair. honestly kc is one of the those frustrating people who like you show him how to do something creative one time and he’s got it, his brain has tapped into it, he remembers. but don’t worry, give him one math problem and he completely shuts down sdkjsdjk 

hates wearing shoes. will take his shoes off the moment he has the opportunity. straight up leaves his shoes places and then’ll be like ??? fuck where did i put those ??? 

can cook surprisingly well. makes bomb weed brownies but like just in general kace makes good food. always forgets to grocery shop until his fridge is empty though

dresses like a hippie. his general aesthetic makes it look like he was in nineties movie. wears wire rimmed glasses because they were his grandfather’s and he’s too broke to buy new frames. most hipsters see him and are like !!! cause they think he’s one of them but kc knows nothing about movies or coffee or like... anything but art really so they’re pretty quickly disappointed. 

used to have hella long hair when he was younger, like he was usually picked on for looking kind of girly because of it. didn’t really care that much, or at least convinced himself he didn’t really care that much eventually. was glad when he got home schooled though cause at least then he didn’t have to deal with that anymore, 

has a scar through his eyebrow from when he fell out of a tree his first summer. 

has several ear piercings. 

i forgot to mention, kc’s mother used to be a drug dealer before her overdose but he doesn’t really know what she does now. he doesn’t talk to her very often but he talks to his dad even less. whenever his mom contacts him it’s cause she’s gotten out of rehab and needs money. kc will usually give it to her because he’s soft. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS.  it takes me 3-7 business days to process my feelings

i am so tired so we’re doing this in a blob but i would love LOVE some exes from summers past, some ex flings, his first bf/gf, idk his first kiss would also be cool, someone who hates him like maybe an enemy or an old rival of some sort? an old stupid rivalry from when they were campers that they still can’t let go of now? just sayin. uh, an fwb or ewb situation maybe, another childhood friend would be cute, an opposites attract situation like i would love for kc to have a dynamic with someone who really has their shit together yk like completely different from his sleepy ass, a smoking buddy maybe! a family friend! godsibling! first love! someone who kc accidentally set on fire with a flaming marshmallow when they were thirteen! anything and everything please and thank you. 

[tell-mi]

One Day, Maybe

Part 1 - Beat of my heart

Chris Evans x Anastasia Hofmann (25 year old actress and mother of 5 year old Nathalie)

Warnings: whole lotta fluff and language

"Nathi, beany, come on you've gotta stay at the kindergarden. Mommy will pick you up at evening. Okay?" you smooched your little bean goodby. That's how you called your five year old daughter Nathalie. Every morning since a week your heart broke into tiny pieces, when you saw her little face turn sad. You moved from LA to New York for a new TV series a year ago but Nathalie still wasn't getting used to it. Especially after your filming break of two months. It wasn't the first move with Nathalie. The last years have been incredible for you and your acting career. You broke up the theater school in Berlin five years ago, as you knew you had been pregnant. Marco, your boyfriend and the father of Nathalie just broke up your relationship and left you. Never have you heard of him again. You knew that it wouldn't ever be possible to go on with acting and raise a girl as a single mom, so you took the hard decision. As Nathalie turned three you two moved to LA due to a surprisingly acting chance for a sitcom which just came up. You accepted the possibility to get a contract at your dream job and it pushed your carreer to the top. Within a few month you became one of Hollywood's most demanded actresses on TV shows.

Nevertheless you always decided in favour of Nathalie. She was always your number one and no job in the world was worth leaving her to some Nanny's for weeks without seeing her. So you only accepted job offers if there was the possibility to take her with you and a kindergarden nearby.

The last movement was a hard one for Nathalie. Growing up in Germany she went into a german kindergarden and only spoke this language. In LA you have found a german kindergaren for her as well. You wanted her to continue speaking her mother tongue and in the afternoon you started to learn english with her. She was really good in it now with her five years. But now in New York there was only the possibility to bring her to an english kindergarden, which turned out to be a bit difficult for Nathalie. Maybe that's why she made you a hard time every morning while leaving her behind with a nursery teacher.

***

You arrived on set a few minutes to late again. Almost sprinting to the hair and makeup trailer you just finished in time with the dressers. The series was something between suits and billions. Some intrigue filled lawseries. It was a good storyline and your charcters development during the season was great. Which was one reason every single fan hyped the series. Not to say, Chris Evans being your costars made all female fans love the series.

You've just started to film the second season the past week and got very excited about the twists and turns. While going through the Skript at the table read you saw that there will be a few steamy scenes between Chris and you. Your characters didn't like each other very much, as they were concurrents, but it may turn out that after a few drinks they will land in each others bedrooms very soon.

You always appreciated the friendship of Chris and you. He was a sweet and handsome person. A good raised one too. He was a true gentleman with that extra scoop of smut written across his face while he flirts. You always enjoyed flirting with Chris but never took it too seriously, as you thought it was just his thing. His own character is some kind of the flirty one. It wasn't something he does exceptional for you. At least this was your perception of him. The chemistry between the two of you was kind of special since the first day you've met. It felt like you knew each other for a lifetime. It was so easy going with Chris. Talking about your life's, your family, your dreams. You two had the chemistry, everyone saw during interviews. Your fans shipped you thatfore.

But whatsoever, it was a hard time for Nathalie at the moment and you don't want to bother her with new strangers she has to get used to. That's why you didn't want to see someone, even if you could have a lot of men who crushed over you. You tried a few dating apps here and there but never really got into it. And additionally, you haven't brought one single man home since Nathis birth which made you into a dating analphabeth.

***

The moment after you went throughout the sex scenes at the table read, Louanne, the director, called it a day. It was earlier than normal, a few minutes past three. You normally picked up your little Bean at seven. The earliest time they allow the pickup, due to pedagogical reasons, was five. You decided to rush to a cafe and let yourself enjoy the few spare time you've had for months. Sitting at the table with your double-chocolate-doughnut and a large coffee infront of you, you checked your phone and found the dating app, which showed you, which user was nearby to meet up. 'Hmh, maybe I should give it a try and have a nice coffee date until I pickup Nathi' You scrolled through your phone until a deep but familiar voice raised you out of your swiping routine.

"You don't really use this, do ya?" You looked up into his beautiful piercing green-blue eyes. The same eyes which glared at you an hour ago with a smirk, as you finished reading the sex scene. Why was your heart pumping so badly by the thought of being near to him all of sudden?

"Nah, I..I wanted to uninstall it. Tried it once, but just some creeps there."

"Good, heard some weird stories about it. May I?" Chris gestured to the seat infront of you, one hand holding a coffee, the other one holding a sandwich.

"Sure, sure. I just grabbed some stuff until I pick up my little Bean" you cannot help but smile of the thought of your daughter finally happy again to see you.

Chris lips also rose up by the sight of you being happy.

"You cannot deny, you truly love her."

"I do!" You sipped on your, still too hot, coffee. "I mean, sometimes the little princess can truly be a pain in the ass."

"What!?" Chris almost chocked his coffee.

"Yeah, yesterday she managed to lock herself up in the bathroom. Can't tell you how this girl was even able to do that. But I ended up asking Mister Smith to help me break the door. You know the Smith's? My neighbor from downstairs." Chris not making an expression as if he could remember. "The older couple which was sitting in the frontyard as you dropped me off the other night after our season one wrapping drinks with the crew."

"Oh yeah, yeah, that really nice couple. The lady sitted Nathalie, wasn't she?"

"Yeah right. By the way, Betty really liked you." You bit a huge bite from your doughnut, almost spilling out the cream to your pullover.

"Does she?" Chris smiled amused while observing your eating skills.

"Yeah, she told me you are the most handsome young man she saw since Walter. And I cannot proof her wrong, though" You smiled at him, your cheeks slightly turning red at what you just said.

You heard his chuckle. It was really precious, as if he was the kind of shy guy, which he surely wasn't. He waved you off with one hand. "Come on, there must be one hundred men who are way better than this old house here."

"I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it Evans." You tried to manage the doighnut into your mouth but ended up with the chocolate cream all over the plate and a bit on your chin. You had to shake your head at yourself for this clumsyness. Now it was your turn to chuckle which slowly raised into a soft laugh.

Chris couldn't hold back but laugh at you as well. "I would bet your five year old has more grace than you." he sighed in between his laughter.

"Ah, come on! You don't even know how hard it is to eat a dougnut with so much cream on, Mister superhealty sandwich!" you moaned at him.

"It isn't that hard, Stacey!"

"Uh huh!" You scratches a bit of cream from your plate to your finger and tipped it on Chris' nose. Now you were the one who had to grin. Biting your tongue you tried to suppress your laughter. Chris took the cream from his nose liking it from his finger.

"You are one mean young lady, Anastasia. But thank you, I wanted to taste your dougnut since I had to look at you biting in it. It was either this way or I had to lick it from your face." he smirked. It was those kind of flirtings which made the butterflies in your tummy wake up again. You was used to his flirts, but the two of you never had been alone somewhere. Everytime it was at the bar or a restraunt with your other colleague's. It was easy and not to intimate. You've always got the feeling that it might go deeper when the two of you would have been all alone but never imagined it would happen.

"That would have been interesting, though" was your only answer at Chris' point.

Now you could say it was him, who turned slightly red. Quickly he raised his coffee to take a huge gulp. You've watched the clock, it was slowly turning five and you wanted to pickup Nathalie earlier to go walking in the park with her.

"Look, I have to go, pick up my little one." You stood up from your chair, Chris was doing the same. He pulled you into a hug. It was something you often did. No unusual thing for you. But this time you would have sworn the hug was tighter than every hug before. And it lastet a little bit to long to just be a friendly kind of hug. Nevertheless, you enjoyed it. You really loved his cologne. And you kinda liked it that Chris was nearly a head taller than you. You could swear, you always had a thing for tall, bearded man.

"See you tomorrow Stacey, have a nice evening with your daughter!" his lips were rally near your ear, you could feel his beard tickle your cheek. He left a quick kiss on your left cheek before pulling back.

Grinning like a little schoolgirl you also pulled away but let your hands slide to the side of his chest and holding on to it a little bit longer while staring in his gorgeous eyes. You didn't say anything before letting him go and leave. Your facial expressions said everything.

[mahnati]

So now that I’ve finished the three main routes of Three Houses and my life can sorta go back to normal, I decided to write my opinions on the three lords. There will be spoilers, so... be warned.

Edelgard: Edelgard answered a long time question that nobody had, which was “if Mad King Ashnard and Arvis had a one night stand, what would their baby look like?”. She has the same ideals as Arvis, wanting an equal society and wanting to unify an entire continent in order to achieve that, while trying to achieve this dream by implementing Ashnard’s blunt methods, by conquering other countries, with only who she deemed to be strong and capable being worth of holding positions of power. Like Arvis, she decided to ally with a not so great cult who she is not a fan of, but can provide her with the power she needed to start the war. Like Ashnard, she also despises the current hierarchy and wants to create a world where only the strong thrive.

I love Edelgard. The story makes her spend time enough with her for us to sympathize with her motivations and does a good job in showing why she is the way she is when the events of the story takes place. She’s confident, charismatic, highly driven by her goals and has a gorgeous, GORGEOUS design, especially post-timeskip. Her relationship with Byleth also feels the most genuine out of the three lords, with Byleth being the reason why she becomes softer in her own route, after all, it is implied that she still harbors feelings for them regardless of the route that the player takes.

I also think that Edelgard is full of shit and cannot for the life of me see her an anti-hero. Yes, her motivations are sympathetic and she suffered a lot, but it is hard to defend someone who started a war against an entire in continent in order to impose your ideals on different societies. Part of me wonders how much Edelgard wanted this unification because she wanted to unify humanity against the Children of the Goddess or… simply because she wanted to restore the Adrestian Empire to its former glory, to get back at those “traitors from the Kingdom”. Her epilogue stating that Faerghus and the Church of Seiros were soon forgotten by the masses, implying that she erased both the Kingdom and the Church’s history from history books, which… yikes. I don’t see that as just nor noble. I also think that the story did a terrible job at showing her relationship against the Agarthans. Some people say that they were blackmailing her, but considering how Edelgard’s character was heavily influenced by Arvis, who did ally with the Loptr Church out of arrogance, thinking he could dispose of them when necessary… it just makes me think that Edelgard, the girl who was tortured by the same people who she is allying herself with in order to take down people who didn’t have anything directly to do with her tragic past, it feels super dumb from her part.

I wish Crimson Flower treated her right. Edelgard deserved better than a rushed, half-assed route. She could have been my favorite FE villain, but alas, that title still goes to Lyon. She’s still in my top three though.

Dimitri: I never expected to like this guy this much. I started with Blue Lions because that was the house with Ashe and Mercedes, but my heart was taken by this princely, damaged boy. As far as design goes, Dimitri was the one who left me the least impressed (yes, even his post-timeskip, I was still drooling over Edelgard). Unlike Edelgard and Claude, Dimitri doesn’t seem to have grand plans for Fodlán, preferring to focus on his revenge against the people responsible for the Tragedy of Duscur. This makes his route seem less focused on lore and the world at large, instead preferring to show the rebuilt of his decaying Kingdom. I feel like his story felt more personal and more about him than the other routes and honestly, I usually prefer character-driven stories, so I felt the Blue Lions route more engaging than the other routes. Dimitri is a tragic character, whose strong compassion for the oppressed at one point drives him to brutality and he needs the help of his friends (especially Byleth) to bring him back to the light. There is something about excessive compassion being treated as a flaw that fascinates me, so Dimitri hits a sweet spot for me. I think they could have handled his recovery a little bit better, but I just let that one slide.

I do think that Dimitri blaming baby Edelgard for the tragedy of Duscur to be hilarious though. Imagine thinking that a thirteen y/o girl is to blame for the massacre of hundreds of people. I know that anger can lead us to have irrational thoughts, but come on, it’s just funny. I also have issues with Dimitri saying that his fight is in benefit of the common people, yet he barely involves them or hears them when it came to making decisions. I still think that he is right in calling out on Edel’s bullshit, on how the world she wants to build that only favors the strong.

Dimitri also feels like the most realistic lord out there, in which he is not some 17 y/o with a master plan to dismantle a millennia y/o system and continued to follow with that plan for 5 years until their comatose teacher woke up and helped them with their plans and I admire that about him too and performed incrementalist reforms.

Claude: Claude is fascinating to me in that he is the smartest lord of the bunch, but his goals are so naive that I’m left with mixed feelings. Really, Claude? Your plan to ending prejudice is by uniting Fodlán as one nation and, once you achieve that, you can destroy the protected border between Fodlán and Almyra? Sure, making the interactions between two nations can ease some of the prejudices that both people have toward each other, but I doubt that this will end racism. His supports with Cyril tries to show that he has a blind spot for the suffering of people who were less fortunate than him back in his home country, but that’s not really brought up in the main story.

His route is weird, as it puts a lot of emphasis in lore and explaining what is up with the secret cult that has been pulling the strings from behind the scenes, but out of the three routes (excluding SS), his feels less like his story and more like a series of events in which he is there. I’ve seen people say that Verdant Wind is the most lighthearted route, but I think this has to do with the fact that Claude seems oddly detached from it. Things happen and he tries to turn them into his advantage, which is fine, it is in character and certainly paints him in a better light than a certain red lord, but it didn’t make me care about his story all that much. I think it’s interesting how he and Edelgard are not so different in the aspect of them wanting to conquer all of Fodlán in order to achieve their ideals, but I think Claude feels more sympathetic simply because he is not the aggressor in this case.

As far as character goes, I like characters who have a sunny and friendly disposition, but can be cold and calculating if needed. I like how he has troubles trusting people and letting get close to him, since he was always seen as an outsider no matter where he lived. Unfortunately, this also means that his relationship with Byleth doesn’t feel as genuine as the other two lords, at least pre-timeskip. And by genuine, I mean it’s hard to believe that his interest in Byleth was anything other than using them and the Sword of the Creator for his own goals, while Edelgard and Dimitri at least feel like they are more interested in them as a person and not as a tool. Their relationship gets better though.

When it comes to design, I think they managed to portray his easygoing, friendly personality well, with his pre-timeskip sporting a more wild hair and post-timeskip showing a more mature and serious side in his combed hairstyle. Also he’s just really hot, ok? Wow.

[feitclub]

In The Cards

It all started with James Bond, the arbiter of worldliness and all things cool when I was just a kid stuck in suburbia. The movies were frequently shown on TV and I made it a point to watch them all over and over again. One of my early favorites was Live and Let Die: the theme song kicked ass, it was Roger Moore's first film so he would never look more handsome, and the movie was full of straight-up magic. The bad guys have a fortune teller on their side, and she can seemingly see everything James Bond will do, even from a great distance. The key to her abilities, aside from her being a virgin (which Bond *ahem* takes care of) was her use of tarot cards. Drawing randomly from this special deck of cards, she could literally see the past, the present, and the future.

I had never heard of tarot cards before but I knew I wanted them. I could not have been older than 12.

When I got my hands on a deck, likely from a book store at the mall, there was an instant level of disappointment. The tarot cards in the Live and Let Die had a very specific look to them, and I had presumed that was just how all tarot cards would look. The deck which I bought (received? I don't remember if my parents were in on this) looked different. All the cards were there, but the art I had expected was not. The biggest difference that stood out to me was the "Death" card: in Live and Let Die that card has a super badass drawing of Death-incarnate wearing a suit of armor while riding a Pale Horse as all manner of human beings knelt or simply fell before him. In my deck, Death looked like a cartoon skeleton without clothes or a horse as he literally reaped the grass with a scythe. I am not here to judge aesthetics, but if you see something in a movie and you end up buying something else, especially as a kid, that's not going to sit right.

(I have tried to use modern search engine tools to discover what kind of deck I had: it was easy to figure out that Live and Let Die used a kind of Rider-Waite-Smith deck, but I think I might have ended up with a variant on a Marseilles deck - exactly which variant, I could not say)

Artistically it was a let down but the appeal of the tarot cards only increased as I learned more about them. First, I discovered that the deck was huge with 78 different cards: the big-picture cards that were featured in the film with names like "The Lovers" and "The Fool" were part of the Major Arcana, but there was also a full set of Minor Arcana which resembled playing cards: four suits, lots of numbers, and several face cards. Secondly, every card had two different "readings," depending on which direction the card faced when drawn.

78 cards, all with two different meanings, meant memorization. As a kid, I was all about memorization. In elementary school my friend Sasha and I tried to memorize the Periodic Table and I think we made it to the lanthanides. When I discovered the joy of watching professional sports, I made a point of memorizing all the teams - by division - in all four major sports leagues. Then I started memorizing the championship winners (and the runners-up) of each major sports league for the last ten years...then the last 20. These tarot cards were going to be my new thing, I could feel it.

I started carrying the cards with me wherever I went. As a kid in school this was easy since I always had a backpack on so the size of the cards meant nothing. Sasha and I (we had watched Live and Let Die together, so this became a team obsession) each had our own deck and we both would take turns drawing cards and looking them up in the little booklet that came in the box. I can remember taking them with us on a school trip to Boston and when we weren't in awe of the historical sights (do I need to tell you we were both nerds?) we kept up our tarot studies while walking around town. On one occasion, just as we drew a card and the booklet said it meant "danger," a car honked its horn at us. We were walking in the middle of the street! Clearly, the magic was real.

The tiny booklet also included a recommended layout when "reading" the cards. The lady in the movie just turned them over one at a time and everything made sense to her, but instead these instructions had us laying out ten different cards in a pattern where each card has a different relationship to the reader. Today I can tell you this pattern is called a "celtic cross" and it is only one of many, many shapes and patterns that can be used, but preteen me did not have that information. I had clear directions: to read the cards I had to flip over ten of them and explain them all.

Before I knew it, before either of us were really ready to be doing anything like this, I remember both of us became tarot card readers at our synagogue for a Purim festival. At the time I didn't think anything was weird, but in hindsight I am impressed that no one raised an objection to kids bringing such a thing into the synagogue so we could be fortune tellers. I should say that we were members of a Reform Temple and I cannot recall ever hearing words like "blasphemy" or "occult" used by our rabbi or anyone else in authority; it stood in contrast to all those self-described Christians I would see on TV who were mad about evolution being taught in schools, talking animals existing as characters in children's books, or anything else we might read in a Chick Tract (which come to think of it, we also discovered around this time while riding Metro-North trains into New York City).

My tarot reading habit did not last; Sasha and I had a falling out of sorts and other things just became more important than these strange cards. My deck sat on a shelf in my room for years until I moved out of my childhood home. I cannot say for certain but it more than likely did not leave with me. But my curiosity surrounding the tarot would linger in my mind and resurface soon enough just as my next big obsession would come along and reveal itself to be tarot-adjacent: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure.

When I discovered JoJo via a fan-subtitled bootleg VHS in the late 1990s, I had no idea the six episodes of anime I just saw covered only one small part of an ongoing (to this day!) manga. The story, as presented on the tape, started in the middle of the action. A lot of it did not make sense, but I latched onto one element right away: every character had superpowers which were embodied - literally - in a spiritual version of themselves on screen and all these alter-egos had tarot-related names: Star Platinum. Hierophant Green. THE WORLD. There wasn't much connection between the card names and the powers they possessed, but it was the coolest thing I had ever seen. If I had still owned a deck I might have started imagining other powers for the other cards not shown on screen (not knowing that they were all represented in some fashion in the original manga).

Leap forward another - gosh, twenty years? - and my tarot fascination never really went away. When I see a Kickstarter or an Etsy page for a new take on tarot cards, I often take a peek at what ideas are on display. A lot of them are just...porn-y. Some are cute. But I'm old(er) now, I don't have the raw enthusiasm I did when I was in 7th grade and the prospect of magic playing cards just made perfect sense. I see daily horoscopes on Japanese TV which I recognize aren't "real," how could I scoff at one kind of fortune telling and then pick up a deck of tarot cards?

Except...who cares if it's "real." What does it matter if these cards are, ultimately, a random assortment of quality art? It's been three entire decades since I first saw them and I'm still deeply intrigued. Part of being old(er) is coming to terms with your own tastes and biases; I no longer need to apologize or feel shame for liking old pop songs or macho action movies and if I've always had a feeling that tarot cards are cool, that feeling is correct.

There's also the feeling that I know so little about tarot cards that I cannot possibly pass judgement on people who use them. I recently started testing a Body Positivity mobile app that uses tarot cards as a means to spark self-reflection and, well, body positivity. The tarot cards in the app are not "real," they're not even physical. They're just drawings on a screen. But the drawings are nice, and if flipping a virtual card over can have a real impact on my own mind, who's to say what flipping real cards over could do?

Even though I felt a need to write all this down, I'm not actually seeking permission here. I already made up my mind and bought a brand-new deck of tarot cards. It's here, next to me. I’ve opened them. I try to draw a few cards whenever I have a chance, but I don't know where this reignited interest will take me. Will I start memorizing them all, again? Will I have another car-honking-its-horn-at-me moment? Maybe I'll just enjoy them aesthetically (they are very nice-looking if I may say so). I don't know what will come next any more than these cards do, but I know I like having them here and I want to know more. At the very least, tarot cards have already taught me an important lesson: I know better than to try and read them while walking in the middle of the road.

---- I shared this story with my Patreon supporters before posting it publicly. Want to help me write more things? Join today: patreon.com/feitclub Ko-fi works too: ko-fi.com/feitclub

[yanjuniverse]

First Kiss - Fan Chengcheng/Huang Justin Imagine

Fan Chengcheng would like to get one thing straight before he starts things off: he is not a pervert. He doesn’t want anyone to listen to whatever the hell Justin Huang has to say - the kid probably still wets the bed. So what if he can’t peel his eyes away from the television screen during sex scenes or the out right whine he lets out when Ziyi skips through them. So what if he can’t help it if he pauses for a moment in the doorway when he catches his two bandmates in a steamy make out session on the couch (if they don’t want to be caught, they would’ve taken it somewhere else, right?).

He’s 19, dammit. Let him be curious.

It’s not his fault that he’s never laid his lips upon anyone else’s except maybe his little cousins who find the need to always leave snotty kisses on his face and the cute puppies that come in and out of his dorm. It’s not his fault that he spent the first half of his life in hiding and the second part training to be an idol. He’s just never found the time to go out and look for romance. He has an excuse to be the way he is.

So yeah, maybe he is a little jealous when he finds out his band leader Zhu Zhengting gets to mess around with the Cai Xukun. Maybe he is a little irritated when he sees Zhangjing sneak a kiss to Yanjun. But the one thing he will admit to being angry about is when Justin comes bounding into their room talking about how he had his first kiss when he was only ten years old.

Ten is a bit too young, Chengcheng thinks. Ten year olds should be worried about crayons and action figures and barbie dolls - not kissing. And the sudden outburst of information makes Zhengting, who is in their room for once and not with Xukun, all but choke on his drink.

“Why the sudden confession?” Zhengting asks.

“Because Linong told me that one of us in this room still hasn’t had their first kiss,” he smirks, eyes evilly pointed towards Chengcheng, who instantly feels his stomach fall out of his ass.

“Chengcheng?” Fuck, Chengcheng really hates when Zhengting uses that voice with him. Usually, he ends the conversation with pinched red cheeks and messy hair. “You’ve never had your first kiss?” Zhengting coos. “Aw, baby!”

“I’m not a baby!” he cries out. “And who the hell are you to be spreading my business like this?” he points his finger accusingly at Justin.

“You’re the one who always goes around calling me a virgin!” Justin fights back, once again causing Zhengting to squeal.

“Fan Chengcheng!” he gasps.

“Well he is!” Chengcheng rolls his eyes.

“He should be!” Zhengting snaps. Justin is only seventeen and the last thing Zhengting wants his seventeen year old son to be doing is sinning.

“At least I had my first kiss!” Justin teases again, sticking his tongue out.

Chengcheng decides that he’s had enough and jumps down from his top bunk on an actual mission to kill Justin (he means it this time. He can do prison time. Him and Linkai watched a Youtube video on how to make a knife out if a toothbrush last week and he’s sure he could use his status as Fan Bingbing’s little brother to his advantage in prison. He’s watched enough Orange is the New Black for this. He’s ready). But before he can, Justin is running down the hall screaming for Ziyi (the one person Chengcheng is sure could kick his ass and wouldn’t regret it) and Zhengting is high tailing it behind the rest of them to make sure his children don’t get blood on the carpets he just had deep cleaned at the beginning of the week.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, where’s the fire?” Ziyi asks as Justin ducks behind him.

“Let me kill him! We could sacrifice him to the gods! He’s a fucking virgin and that has to go for something!” Chengcheng shouts from behind Xukun, who had also come out from his room to see what all the noise is about, as if it’s the most sane thing in the world to say.

“I’m a child of God!” Justin retorts. Chengcheng knows he’s not. Justin just wants to make the others feel bad for him. I mean, if a little church boy came screaming devil to you, who would you believe? “I’ve made a promise of abstinence! You haven’t even-“

“Shut up!” Chengcheng yells.

“What the hell is going on?!” Yanjun groans, eyes piercing as he opens the door of his and Zhangjing’s room. Chengcheng wants to scoff because Yanjun hasn’t been the least bit intimidating to him since he found out his favorite past time is singing Baby Shark to Zhengting’s dogs - what a fucking Virgo.

“Can’t we just put these two up for adoption already?” Zhangjing leans his head against the door. “I’m willing to pay the fee. We can easily drop them off in a box too at a church if it comes to it.”

“We are not putting my kids up for adoption,” Zhengting snaps. “If my kid goes, so does yours.”

“Like we’d give up Linong,” Zhangjing snorts, pulling the younger into his arms and rubbing his hair. “Right? We all love Nongnong!”

“Hello!” Justin is screaming again. “Are we all just going to ignore the fact that Chengcheng sits here and calls me a virgin all the time but he hasn’t even kissed somebody before!”

And, oh yeah, Chengcheng almost forgot that’s why they’re all having a meeting in the middle of the hallway.

His eyes immediately are set ablaze again. A look of realization crosses Linong’s face as Linkai all but crumbles to the ground in a fit of laughter.

“Two virgins,” he whispers. Two virgin sacrifices might just get him the Nintendo Switch he’s been begging Zhengting for for months.

Before he can jump, Zhengting and Xukun pull him back and shove them into the room all while Justin is laughing wickedly from the other side of the door.

“Cheng,” Zhengting sighs, rubbing his temples. He’s too young to be getting worry lines, he tells himself as Chengcheng throws himself onto Xukun’s bed. “You cannot threaten to sacrifice people.”

“Well why not?” he snipes. “You let Justin and Linong get away with everything! Just admit it,” he crosses his arms, “you like to pick favorites.”

“I don’t-“

“Yes you do,” Xukun replies as he falls onto Ziyi’s now unoccupied bed. “You pick Justin over Chengcheng all the time.”

Chengcheng gestures towards the boy wildly. “See! Told you!” he says.

Zhengting shuts his eyes. “Maybe it’s because they don’t threaten human sacrifice every time something doesn’t go their way, you Satanic spawn.”

“Have you even read up on Satanism? It’s not as scary as you think.”

Zhengting only blinks at him. For a second, he ponders going down this road and talking to Chengcheng about weird conspiracies that sometimes leave the younger one so shaken, he has to crawl into bed with him or else he’ll get nightmares. But Zhengting takes one glance at Xukun and remembers that he has to punish him for defying him (or tickle him until he screams mercy and deny him kisses until he’s on his knees before the older and kissing other-)

“Ge!” Zhengting shakes his head and looks back at Chengcheng. Ugh, why can’t these children just behave long enough for him to get some decent loving around here? Zhengting looks back and forth between the two before Chengcheng huffs, blowing his bangs out of his eyes. “Are you seriously going to punish me? Justin was the one who told everyone my deepest darkest secret. I haven’t even told anyone about that one time we-“ Chengcheng stops suddenly as Zhengting gives him an expectant look.

“We?” he raises his eyebrows.

Chengcheng shakes his head before he tells Zhengting about the one time when he was seventeen and Justin was fifteen and they snuck into a nightclub. He may be mad but not mad enough to kill the captain of the ship as well. “Not the point. The point is that you’re yelling at me when we should be yelling at him!” he cries out, deflating against Xukun. “You’re my favorite parent now.”

“I think I’ll pass,” he grimaces, pushing Chengcheng away.

The youngest one pouts and stands up. “I hate this family. I’m going to tell Wenjun to take me back. Tell him I was lying when I said this new family is was better than the old one because we don’t have to deal with Zeren’s bullshit here.” Chengcheng turns on his feet, waiting for Zhengting to protest and call him dramatic. He stands at the door and wonders why he hasn’t said anything only to turn back and see Xukun crawling next to Zhengting in bed. Whores, he rolls his eyes before leaving.

Chengcheng decides then that he’s had enough embarrassment for the day. He’s not sure where Justin has gone but he does notice that his shoes are missing along with Ziyi’s when he passes the door on his way to the kitchen. He stalks up on some snacks and leaves back to his room, already thinking up ways to have Wenjun take him back in the Yuehua dorm (that he may or may not have gotten banned from after he set the microwave on fire - now that’s a whole other story for another day).

He settles down on his bunk and groans.

So what if he hasn’t had his first kiss? He thinks everyone should stop normalizing first kisses at such a young age.

He thinks about it a moment more then turns his head to the side to stare at the blank white wall, popping another chip into his mouth.

Maybe Xinchun is right - maybe Chengcheng is too picky.

He stays like that for a while, staring at the wall with crumbs littering his shirt and bed. He thinks about a lot of things while laying there - like the time he was in Korea for New Years and almost got to kiss Zhengting at the stroke of midnight just because the older was a little too tipsy. Or all the times he skipped out on playing spin the bottle and instead of kissing Zeren that one time, he popped him in the mouth with the rubber band on his wrist. He thinks about how many people have called him beautiful and told him they wanted more than a friendship and he chose not to pursue them.

He’s not sure what he’s scared of - he’s no stranger to heartbreak or rejection.

Somewhere around eight, Justin comes bounding into the room again. Chengcheng thinks for a moment - wonders if he should jump up and put him in a choke hold or throw him out the window. But instead, he sees the younger one dancing happily to the beat of his own drum and watches him grab some clothes and a towel before leaving again.

Rude, he thinks. Can’t you acknowledge your gege?

Chengcheng has known Justin since Justin was fourteen and he was sixteen. He remembers that he stayed in his family’s hotel a little before Justin left to Korea.

He still remembers meeting him in the arcade. The young boy with his natural dark hair was walking around the arcade when he stopped in front of where Chengcheng was playing basketball and laughed.

“Maybe you should stick to your day job,” he snickered as Chengcheng missed another shot.

“Shut up,” Chengcheng snorted just as the machine went off - his game is over. Chengcheng frowned, knowing his that was the last bit of his coins and sighed.

But, as if Justin could read his mind, he pulled a key out from his pocket and crouched down in front of the machine, opening the box where all the quarters would fall to and fished out a whole handful. “Here,” he smiled. Chengcheng remembers giving him a weird look before Justin said, “Don’t worry. My parents own all of this. I do it all the time.” He handed him the coins and then took a step back. “I’m Minghao but you can call me Justin.“

“Chengcheng,” he replied. “Fan Chengcheng.”

“Well Fan Chengcheng, let’s keep in touch. You owe me a favor now!” Justin said.

They had switched numbers and Chengcheng kept in touch. He rooted for Justin when Justin went to Korea, he comforted him when he came back to China, he joined his company when Justin suggested it and now, they’re in two bands together.

He thinks may he sees Justin too often. Maybe that’s what keeps him from actually killing the younger boy. Chengcheng still remembers how Justin would always call him an “angsty teenager” because all Chengcheng used to do was complain.

“I don’t know what you’re complaining about. Your sister is Fan Bingbing, you’re rich, you’re not that bad to look at and you’re best friends with the one and only Huang Minghao,” he had told him somewhere in the beginning of their friendship.

He knows he shouldn’t complain. He has a life that many people dream of and yet, he can’t help but feel saddened by the fact that he’s never gotten the chance to experience a normal life.

Maybe I am an angsty teenager, he thinks as he sits up for the first time in hours, watching all of the crumbs from his shirt litter the bed. He’ll just sleep in Zhengting’s tonight then complain about it tomorrow when the older comes looking for clothes.

“You look so sad,” Justin chuckles from the doorway, shaking a towel on his wet hair.

“There are crumbs on my bed,” he says.

Justin blinks. “Okay?” Chengcheng just shrugs and stands up, staring at his sheets a while longer. Justin sighs and walks over, using his towel to swat the remnants onto the floor. “Better?” he asks.

“I was gonna make Zhengting to it-“

“Well,” Justin shrugs. They’re silent for another beat. It grows awkward until Justin groans. “What’s even wrong with you?”

Chengcheng isn’t sure how to respond. What is wrong with him? It’s not the first time Justin’s spilled a secret about him to his band mates. In fact, sometimes, it seems like it’s his life goal to embarrass his elder; like the time he told everyone he had a rash in the place where the sun don’t shine, or the time he leaked pictures of Chengcheng picking his nose to the groupchat. But there was this feeling in the pit of his stomach that made today’s confession a little different.

“What’s wrong with me?” Chengcheng asks, tone catching Justin off guard. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“What are you even talking about?” Justin frowns, taking a step back.

Chengcheng’s not sure what he’s talking about but words are rolling off his tongue anyways.

“I mean, who the hell even are you? To go around and spill my business like this?” Chengcheng jabs his finger accusingly into his chest.

“Dude, it was a joke,” Justin pouts. He keeps backing him until he feels his back hit the door and it click behind him. Chengcheng takes another step and they’re now flushed together. “Leave me alone,” Justin orders.

“Who the fuck cares if I haven’t had my first kiss?” Chengcheng growls at him.

“Nobody does!” Justin retorts. He knows nobody does. If anything, nobody is surprised because Chengcheng isn’t a very affectionate person. He hates when his personal space is intruded, hates when people touch him. He doesn’t give hugs or cuddle with his members. In fact, this is the closest Justin thinks they’ve been since they both debuted on Idol Producer.

“Well obviously you do if you went around telling everyone!” Chengcheng shouts.

“I was trying to annoy you!” Justin groans.

“But why?!” Chengcheng asks. “Why do you always have to be so damn annoying?! Why can’t you just let me breathe for once, huh?! Did it ever occur to you that I may be saving my kiss for someone special?!”

“What’s so special about a kiss?! It’s just a stupid kiss!” Justin is irritated. He doesn’t like when Chengcheng raises his voice at him and he knows Chengcheng has no right to. He knows Chengcheng can sit and talk things out with him. He knows his elder knows how to act. But Justin just wants to go to sleep but for that to happen, he’ll need Chengcheng to 1) get out of his face and 2) shut the hell up. “Everyone kisses! Nobody gives a damn who your first kiss is with! They only care about how well you do it and you’re fucking eighteen and probably kiss like a washing machine! I probably kiss way better than you!”

“And?!” Chengcheng’s ears are red now. He’s not sure where all this anger is coming from but he’s burning inside out.

“And that’s all you have to say,” Justin replies, a bit satisfied with himself to see that he’s won again. “So go away.” He tries to slip out between the door and Chengcheng but the older presses him back against the door. He groans, “Chengcheng, what?”

“You’re annoying as hell,” his voice is low. “Why aren’t you like this to everyone else?”

Justin crosses his arms, turning his head to the side. He knows Chengcheng is right. Justin may be annoying but the level he takes it with Chengcheng is enough to make anyone’s skin crawl with anger.

“You’re stupid, that’s why,” Justin mutters, trying again to walk away, only to be pressed back against the door.

“Minghao,” Chengcheng grits through his teeth. Justin rolls his eyes, something Chengcheng hates. He grabs his jaw and snaps the boy’s head so he can look him in the eyes. “Huang Minghao. Why the hell are you so annoying towards me and not everyone else?” he asks even lower.

“Because I don’t want to be everyone else’s first kiss,” Justin replies, catching Chengcheng off guard. “I’m not sure if you’ve noticed but being annoying is how I flirt around here. So either kiss me right now or let me go to bed and think about how fucking stupid you are because I’ve been wanting to be your first kiss since the day in the arcade but if you aren’t going to let me be your special person-“

Chengcheng hates how much Justin talks sometimes. So, he decides to shut him up like how they do in the movies, by kissing him. That way, Justin gets to be his first kiss, Chengcheng gets to have his first kiss and they’ll both get to go to sleep one kiss richer.

Justin is the first to pull away, a bit breathless but with a smirk on his face.

“Told you that you suck at kissing,” he smiles, pressing another quick one on his lips. “Don’t worry. I’ll teach you.”

“Who even taught you how to kiss?” Chengcheng pouts.

”Youtube,” he laughs. “You can find everything on there.”

“I sort of hate you.”

“You can’t hate me. We’re boyfriends now!” Justin frowns.

“Says who?”

“Do you want me to kiss you again or not,” Justin crosses his arms.

And Chengcheng realizes then that once again, Justin is wrong.

It’s not about your first kiss, or how well you kiss, or where you kiss. It’s about the person you’re kissing.

And Chengcheng is definitely ready to kiss Justin for a very long time.

[thatonecurlygirl]

Biology of Billy Hargrove [4]

Fandom: Stranger Things Pairing: Billy x Reader Word Count: 1.8k Read the other chapters here A/N: I know I’ve been slacking with posting content. I hope you’ll forgive me. Here’s the next chapter of ‘Biology of Billy Hargrove’.

The brain’s activity levels go up at night, maybe that’s why you’ve not been able to get a good night sleep recently. That or you haven’t been able to properly rest since you felt his lips nearly touch yours. If you close your eyes, sometimes you can still feel his hands holding on to you. You can feel how his hands rested on your hips, holding you in place against the pool wall as he leaned in, lips centimeters from brushing against yours.

Standing up, you turn on the lamp that sits on your nightstand. The light floods your room as you push back the blankets and being to pace the room. This can’t be happening. This cannot be happening. You can’t be laying in your bed all night, every night thinking about Billy Hargrove. It’s a blasphemous action toward yourself. The guy, the very attractive guy with a perfectly shaped ass and beautiful eyes, admitted that he thought of you as a meek “little rabbit” and now you are laying in bed, imagining what his lips would feel like on you- Too far… TOO far, Y/n.

You stop mid-step, glaring toward the slightly cracked window, your curtains gently blowing with the soft breeze. Walking back to your bed, you turn off the lamp, your room once again consumed by the darkness as you creep toward the window. There you sit, perched on the window sill, staring down at Billy’s house across the street. His car is there, parked in the driveway. You can tell by the not so subtle shake to the car, Billy is definitely not in his room, nor is he alone. You feel weird — dirty almost— not just for the fact that you know exactly what’s going on in the backseat of his car, but also because you feel jealous. With a scoff, you close the window and pull the curtains tightly shut, sluggishly making your way back to your bed.

“Boy am I going to show him wrong.” You say to yourself, pulling your covers up to your chest and lulling yourself to sleep with your plans to show Billy you are far from this “little rabbit” he keeps calling you.

The next morning you are up and dressed before your parents are even up. Your dress meets mid-thigh— long enough for comfort, but short enough to show some ass if you move a certain way— you bought it a couple weeks ago but kept talking yourself out of wearing it. You slid into a cute pair of flats and let your hair stay down. Grabbing your backpack and keys, you head straight out the door without work to your parents who are slowly moving around the house.

When you make it out the front door, you see Max sitting on her front porch across the street with her arms folded across her chest. Tilting your head to the side, you direct your route from your car to Max across the street. As you get closer, Max looks up at you, her kind smile temporarily masks the annoyance.

“You look nice.” She smiles, nodding toward your outfit.

“Thanks. You look… annoyed.” You pull the strap of your backpack farther up your shoulder.

“Yeah, Billy is supposed to take me to school early to work on a project with Lucas and Dustin, but as you can see.” She motions around her as if to say ‘No Billy’.

“I can take you if you’d like. I figured I would hit the library before classes start.” You shrug.

“Really,” Max asks, standing up with wide, pleading eyes.

“Yeah, just go on and tell Billy that I’ll take you and meet me at my car.” You smile and turn on your heels, heading back across the street as Max quickly peeks back in the house.

“Alright, let’s go,” Max says, running past you across the street with her skateboard and backpack.

You laugh at her eagerness to get in the car with you to head to school. You’ve given her a few rides before and she’s always had this reaction, I think it’s because she doesn’t have to ride with Billy. Your laughter is interrupted when you hear Billy call out to his younger sister from the porch.

“Max! If you’re late after school, I’m leaving you.” He warns, but his eyes are trained on you the whole time, eyes trailing your body, stopping on your thighs where the dress cuts off.

“Don’t worry. I’ll bring Max home.” You smile brightly, sliding into the driver’s seat.

Between the tickle of the dress riding up your thighs as you sit down and the way Billy practically drools, you can tell he caught sight of a little more of you than he expected to this morning. With a wave, you close your door, start up your car and drive down the street, heading to the school.

“Thanks, Y/n,” Max says as you pull up to the school and park in your usual spot.

“Oh no problem, Max. I’m happy to help.” You slid out of the car, adjusting your dress before grabbing your backpack. “So, just meet me back out here after school. No rush, okay?”

“You got it.” Max nods, heading to the middle school where the two boys are waiting by the front door for her.

The walk through the school doors and all the way down the hallway to the library was a quiet one, not many students come half an hour early to school. Once you make it to the library, you head straight back to where you hid your current book, in the biographies between the only two books on the thirteenth president barely anyone remembers to acknowledge, Millard Fillmore. You find your favorite spot at the back of the library, where they have a single desk by the window.

“Damn, what’s going on here?” You hear your best friend’s voice.

Pulling your eyes away from the pages, you look up at her, putting a bookmark in the pages and standing up. With a smile, you do a small twirl to show off the dress she had convinced you to buy.

“What do you think, Ang?” You ask arms spread out as if you are waiting to pull in all the compliments she is preparing to throw your way.

“I think the same thing I thought when I first saw it on you, it’s hot! You look good.” She smiles encouragingly as she follows you to the Millard Fillmore books. “That librarian still hasn’t caught on?” She asks as you slip the book between the two Fillmore ones.

“I told you, Ang, there’s just something about President Fillmore.” You shake your head with a small laugh.

The two of you make your way through the library and into the halls that are now busting with other students. Weaving through the crowds, the two of you make your way to your lockers.

“So, what brought on you finally wearing this?” She asks, picking a piece of lint from your dress and you look up at her with big, guilty eyes. “Don’t tell me it’s because of…” She trails off, covering her mouth.

“No! Yes… Maybe.” You shrug, opening your locker. “He said I was meek and I want to prove him wrong, okay?” You sigh.

You feel a presence behind you, a body of a taller stature and you see the way Angie’s eyes light up mischievously. Expecting to see Billy, you whip around, hand on your hip and come face-to-face with Jonas Glee. Jonas is the hot football player you’ve had a crush on since you were in middle school. You feel your face flush as he smiles down at you. His smile is soft and sweet and his eyes quickly scan your body.

“You look great today, Y/n.” Jonas compliments you, eyes locked on yours.

“Thanks, so do you.” You nod, unsure of what to say as he lingers.

“Hey,” He says as if just broken from a trance. “We have a home game tonight. You should come, I mean- I’d like to see you there.”

“Rooting for the other team?” You ask, playfully.

“No, for me.” He chuckles.

Your eyes dart around, landing on Billy who is glaring in your direction. “I’ll be there.” You nod.

“Great, see you around.” He says, walking off with a smile.

“Holy hell! What was that?” Angie asks, wide eyes to match the smile on her face.

You fan your self, shaking our head as if to say you have no idea. “A twisted fucking turn of events is what that was.”

“No.” Angie shakes her head, face going pale as she points down the hallway. “I think, that is a twist in your little story.”

You turn, eyes following to where she is pointing. Your heart picks up as you see Billy sauntering right up to Jonas who is laughing and joking with his friends. You can tell by Billy’s fists clenched at his side, that he means business and you hurry yourself to make it there in time to stop whatever he is planning on doing.

By the time you make it close enough to them, Billy and Jonas are already talking. Jonas spots you, flashing a smile and winking which has Billy turning toward you. You can see the fire, light in his eyes as he pushes Jonas who is sent stumbling backward into his friends. The crowd erupts in a chorus of “oh’s” and cheers as you push through to make it to the two jocks before a full-on fight breaks out.

“Billy stop,” You growl out, putting yourself between the two boys and pushing Billy away.

“Yeah, Billy, stop. You get all the ass around here, I don’t see why we can’t share. You can have her after I’m done with her.” Jonas says in a cocky done from behind you. “From back here, it looks too good not to share.”

Your hands drop from Billy’s chest as you take in the words that just came out of Jonas’s mouth. Slowly turning around, you look Jonas straight in the eyes, a smirk on your face as you take a step closer to him, balling your fist before swing up at him, catching him right in the jaw. He stumbles, taking off guard as the crowd that has gathered around gasps.

“Looks like you won’t have to share, after all, asshole.” You turn, the crowd parts like the red sea, letting your walkthrough.

“Ms. Y/l/n!” A teacher calls out to you as you pass.

“Yep, I know. Office.” You say, waving to the teacher as you walk straight to the principal’s office and plop down in the waiting room seat.

“Why are you here, honey?” She asks.

“Fight.” You say simple, arms folded across your chest.

“With whom?” She says, just as Jonas walks through the door.

“Him.” You point to Jonas who looks worse off than you left him.

“And Mr. Hargrove?” She asks, directing the question to Billy who is being walked in by a male teacher.

“Same story as the pretty lady right there,” Billy says, nodding toward you.

“Of course.” She sighs as Billy takes a seat next to you.

“Nice right hook, little rabbit.” He comments with a smirk.

@xicarcalii @dacremontgomerylover @super-strange-sons @hargrove-mayfield @dontxfearxthereaper @magicwithaknife @asheseiler