#also get ready for part 3 bc it's gonna be intense :)
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theherosvillain · 2 months ago
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In the worst kind of way (Angel arc part 2)
Part 1 - (TNT)KAYF masterpost - Part 3
Contains: kidnapping, captivity, torture, blood, knives
When the door opened again, Vale was on his feet in an instant. “Ah,” Angel said from the doorway, sounding amused, “you got the ropes off. Good for you! I don’t think it’ll help …” She flicked a glance over at the henchmen behind her, more of them than there had been before. “But good for you, Axton! Truly impressive.” Vale narrowed his eyes, waiting for her to get to the point. “Anywho, it occurred to me that your adorable son there might need some medical attention, and I know just how you can earn it.” She leveled her razor-sharp grin at Vale. “You take his place in the next beating.” He bristled, and her eyes lit up with delight as she added, “Or, if you don’t want to, I’m sure Junior can handle a few more hits, right?”
He couldn’t. Vale needed Phantom in working condition if they were going to get out of here. Another beating might knock him out completely, and then he’d only be a liability. “I’ll do it,” Vale said.
“Vale!” Phantom hissed.
Vale didn’t look back at him, but his mouth turned down. “This isn’t a discussion, Phantom.” Not that that had ever stopped him from protesting.
“Aww, isn’t that sweet. He actually cares about you, Axton.” Angel held her lips in a sympathetic pout for a moment before hooking a thumb over her shoulder. “Let’s go, kiddo. Unless you don’t want any painkillers?”
There was a long pause—long enough for Vale to worry that Phantom was, as usual, thinking with his heart instead of his head. Then he heard a rustle of fabric and a hiss of pain that told him Phantom was getting to his feet. As he shuffled forward, he paused by Vale’s side. “You don’t have to do this,” he murmured.
Vale set his jaw. “Go, Phantom.” If Angel had kept her word before, then he was reasonably certain that she would give Phantom medical attention. That was the part he focused on as he watched Phantom warily approach the door.
Two of Angel’s men took Phantom’s shoulders. As they guided him past Angel, she reached over and ruffled his hair. “Good boy!” Phantom flinched, his ears going red. Vale gritted his teeth as the men escorted Phantom out of the room. When Angel turned to him once more, he kept his eyes straight ahead. “And now, for you.”
Angel’s fist collided with his ribs with surprising speed, and he brought up his arms to defend himself as he doubled over in pain. She grabbed a fistful of his hair to yank him upright. “I forgot to mention,” she whispered, her lips close enough to brush his ear. “If you struggle too much, I will bring him back here and personally break every bone in his fucking body.” She angled his head to get a good look at his expression before patting him on the cheek. “So I suggest you behave yourself, m’kay?”
He wouldn’t have dignified her with a response, but she didn’t give him the chance. Her knuckles clipped his jaw, and then the punches didn’t stop coming.
The last time Vale was hit like this had to have been years ago, back when he was new to Jet City and not yet established in his power. Even back then, he’d managed to avoid the worst of the violence. He’d been good at deescalating. Even if he’d wanted to use that skill here, he doubted it would’ve helped him.
His back hit the floor, and Angel’s ridiculous, chunky boot pressed down on his chest. He grabbed her ankle, and she made a tsking sound. “Remember what I said?” He glared at her, slowly bringing his arms back down to his sides, and his chest constricted with the weight on his sternum. “See? You can listen—when you’re not being a goddamn brat.” She cocked her head, and Vale held her gaze. It was a dominance game; Phantom had been right about that. She could do what she wanted, but Vale wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of cracking.
The sudden, prolonged stillness was unnerving, though. Her eyes bored into him like she could crucify him with the intensity of her absurdly dark eyeshadow. “You haven’t said a word yet,” she murmured. “I’d like to change that.” Without breaking eye contact, she pulled out a switchblade and flicked it open, watching him like a hawk for a flinch. He didn’t give it to her.
She straddled his hips, pinning his hands under her knees, and yanked him up by his tie. “Aren’t you scared, Axton?” Her face was inches from his, so close he could smell spearmint on her breath. The blade caressed his carotid artery, soft enough to elicit a shudder. She tilted her head. “Sometimes I wish your men had just killed me, after what they did. But I think this was worth sticking around for.” The knife dipped beneath his shirt collar, drawing a bead of blood. “Answer me—are you scared?”
“Of you?” he sneered.
Her face split into a grin as she ghosted the knife across his Adam’s apple. “Careful, love,” she said. “You’re not the one in charge here. And if you refuse to answer, I think I’ll have to count that as struggling.” With one hand, she began undoing his tie, threading it out from beneath his shirt collar before she popped the top few buttons, leaning in close. “Are you scared, Axton?”
The blade dipped into the hollow of his throat before slicing the neck of his undershirt. He drew in a measured breath. “N-No.”
Her eyes sparkled as she laughed. “Very convincing. Such a stoic little mob boss.” She tapped the tip of his nose with her finger, then trailed down to his torn undershirt and ripped it further open, exposing his chest. The knife’s tip sank in beneath his collarbone. She grabbed his chin and tilted it up. “How about now?”
He set his jaw. “N—”
The knife carved a straight line down his chest. Blood oozed out, seeping into his crisp white shirt. “What was it you said that night?” she asked, drumming her fingers against his jaw. The knife reset itself at the top of the first line and sliced an arc next to it. “That you don’t appreciate liars?”
He might have said that. It was something he reiterated often; he dealt with far too many dishonest people. But he didn’t remember that night, and when Angel had first sauntered into this room, he was certain he’d never seen her before in his life. If she had a problem with the way he did business, she wasn’t alone. The only thing unique about her was that she didn’t seem afraid of what would happen when the tables inevitably turned on her.
“Do you get it now?” The knife drew an inverted V and slowly carved a line through it. Blood gushed out. Not enough to be fatal, Vale knew; just enough to cause pain. “Do you fucking get what you put people through? What you put me through?”
“W-Whatever it was,” Vale said, his molars aching as they ground against one another, “you deserved it.”
Angel laughed, high and loud. The noise made him wince. She brought the knife down to make two little cuts between the shapes she’d drawn, and belatedly, he realized what they were. D.A. Danielle Angel. She grinned, the knife clattering to the floor. “Alright, well,” she said lightly, pressing her thumb into the wound, “have fun explaining this to your lovers.” Then she leaned in and whispered, “That is, if I let you leave here alive.” She drew her thumb, slick with blood, down his chest. When it came up red, she licked it clean and took up the knife again.
-
Title credits: Just One Yesterday - Fall Out Boy
(TNT)KAYF Tag List: @toyybox
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explainslowly · 6 days ago
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Thought it would be fun to do a little Fic Director's Commentary
And then @autisticandroids said I should do Finer things... so here you go...
Dean Winchester always loved the ladies, and the ladies always seemed to love him back. And since he’s such a giver, he doesn’t mind passing the know-how along to the less fortunate.
You know, this line has enough of a self-ironic tongue-in-cheek quality to be almost ooc except Dean is kind of sincere about it, in my mind. The opening line is also sort of mimicking the one-two punch of Dean Winchester Beat Sheet gay Dean tag + opening insane het sex scene. Me when I lie <3
Sam declines Dean’s invitation for a pub crawl with a sour face and then pointedly retires to his own room a few doors down the hall. He can be very squeamish about these things, so Dean is perfectly fine with not being subjected to his running commentary as he teaches Cas to score, Dean Winchester style.
Please imagine being Sam and your insane brother trying to include you in his weird ass sex life where he makes his boyfriend flirt with women for his own titilation. Dean is sort of living in plausible deniality space, here. Well, in his mind. Sam is pretty clear on what is happening.
In the privacy of their room, Dean concentrates on getting Cas ready. Maybe Cas could use a second set of clothes, but there is something so charming about his cheap suit and creeper trench coat. That said, Dean won’t let him go to a bar looking like that.
“Lose the coat and jacket.”
I hope I'm not the only one who thinks it's so hot when Dean plays with Cas like he's his personal dress up doll.
Cas undresses without protest and once he is down to his dress shirt, Dean steps closer and unties the knot, slides the tie from Cas’ neck, the silk sighing softly as it brushes against the cotton of the shirt, Cas’ eyes tightly following the trajectory of Dean’s fist. His breath hitches and he grabs for Dean’s hips, but Dean shakes him off.
So this is like, porn writing to me? Or at least one kind of porn writing - focusing on sensory information and sensuality. Touch, sound, things like that.
“Focus, angel,” Dean keeps his tone light and quietly basks in the effect the word has - Cas shivers, stands taller and keeps his arms loose by his sides. Eager to obey.
Shout out to B autisticandroids for saying "Dean says angel as a pet name but Cas hears 'soldier'".
Dean contemplates their plans. Cas has a lot going on, it’s just a question of making chicks take notice. He sinks his fingers into Cas’ soft hair, taking his time reshaping it until it’s fluffy, until it makes you want to grab and pull. Cas’ eyes are burning, trying to catch Dean’s, the intensity stoking the fire in Dean’s belly.
“If you look at whatever chick we find for you the same way, you’re gonna score for sure, buddy.”
Cas narrows his eyes and whines “Dean…”, a note of complaint audible.
I think I probably could have also tagged this fic as edging lmao. Part of like, the rare concept of dom Dean is that he gets enjoyment and a feeling of power from denying Cas. It's not a game I think Dean plays often bc he tends to think of himself as something for other's consumption. Alternatively, he denies things because he thinks they are not allowed. So denying Cas so playfully here lends the fic a really sweet tone, to me.
“You’ve done so well last time, buddy. Almost there, I can tell.” As expected, the praise cuts any protests short and Cas settles back into being maneuvered by Dean, looking pleased to be handled. Dean undoes the first two buttons on his shirt, and then starts rolling up his shirtsleeves. Cas’ arms are striking, well-toned and covered in dark hair and Dean can’t resist dragging his hand over his forearm, settling at the wrist and squeezing.
“You have to show off your assets.”
Cas cocks his head to the side “My assets?”
“You know,” Dean gesticulates broadly at all of him “like your arms. Put them on the bar, lean in, really let her look. Drives chicks crazy.”
Dean knows what drives chicks crazy. Insert Dean gender implications.
“I see.”
Dean grins and gets a barely perceptible smile from Cas in return. There is something nostalgic about giving out advice. It makes Dean feel smart and cool in a way he hadn’t in ages, maybe ever since Sam stopped looking at him with pure wonder in his eyes and started questioning everything about their family.
Wincest moment. I jest, I jest. But I do think Dean is sufficiently family-pilled that he runs all his relationships either through the "this is like being Sam's brother" or "this is like being Dad's son" filter because those are like. The two relationships he had growing up. Currently Cas is getting the Sammy treatment.
Cas doesn’t question Dean’s wisdom, he listens. And listen he should, because he has a lot to learn - Cas doesn't at all know how to be a guy, and that is a dangerous thing not to know. He is real lucky to have Dean perching on his metaphorical shoulder.
There is a hint of anxiety to this for sure, that Dean is processing underneath it all. He's at least a little scared about Cas being so visibly gay. Even though he likes it.
They arrive at the swanky bar well into the evening, a place Dean chose both for its largely non threatening male population and for ladies who don’t seem to possess very high standards.
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They grab a beer and settle in and not even ten minutes have passed and already Dean has noticed a woman looking in their direction. Of course, there is always a possibility she is actually checking out Dean, but it is worth the risk.
“Your six o’clock, hot lady checking you out.”
“It’s nine pm, Dean.”
“No, jesus. I mean, uh, behind you.”
Amusing myself by Cas not understanding colloquialisms.
Cas turns around with the subtlety of a sledgehammer. Dean can see the lady raising her eyebrows at them, so he winks at her. She seems like a businesswoman, dressed tidy and clean, probably an empty bed and a cat or two at home. She should eat Cas right up.
“Yes, she is looking in our direction,” Cas confirms after turning back.
“Yes, great job Cas, very subtle.” He squeezes his shoulder. “Go for her, Casanova, I believe in you. And remember: less creepy staring, more sexy glowering.”
“Of course,” Cas says magnanimously and off he goes. They have been at this for a few weeks now and Cas had mostly shed his initial nervousness. That diminished Dean’s fun a little, even though he feels pretty proud of himself for getting Cas there. He could probably get him all nervous again if he switched up the scenario somehow, but for now he leans back and watches Cas join the lady at the bar - she seems pleased enough to see him and Dean licks his lips, already imagining how he will reward Cas for succeeding.
Again this is a dom Dean fic. I don't broadly subscribe to daddy dom Dean interpretations but there are scenarios... In this case it is about being Older brother cool guy but also just that Dean really enjoys putting Cas in little situations and watching him flounder. He's so endlessly charmed by him.
Cas says something and the lady laughs. Already as good as hooked, if she thinks Cas is funny, or at least cares enough to pretend. He watches her watch Cas with hunger and yeah, the ladies can appreciate his assets, all right. She is pretty - not porn pretty, but regular sort of next-door by way of yoga class and frappuccinos pretty.
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Dean wants to see Cas touch her. He clasps his hands together and whispers to himself "As I lay me down to sleep, I pray Castiel my soul to keep. You should touch her elbow - slowly and look for her reaction".
This idea came to me as a bolt of lighting. Dean should be using prayer telepathy for sexual reasons <3
He sees Cas twitch and then lean in, smoothly placing his palm over her elbow. The lady laughs, licks her lips, narrows the space between them. Cas' huge palm encircles the delicate crook of her arm and Dean has to drag his jacket over his crotch so that the whole pub can't see him chubbing up.
To be clear Dean is aroused by Cas being Succesfully Heterosexual, but he is also very much imagining himself in that woman's position, for reasons he will simply not be examining in this fic <3 I was not aiming for a trans woman Dean reading here, but to me, Dean always has gender going, no matter what.
Cas is good at maintaining physical closeness without being threatening - there’s something harmless about him, something almost innocent Dean thinks, and the chicks eat it up.
Personally I think Dean's read on Cas is insane and maybe a little offensive but also he's obsessed with his little guy. Make of that what you will.
Cas whispers something into the woman’s ear and she smiles, Dean mimicking her facial expression involuntarily.
He's so normal <3
It’s good - let everyone know that Cas is a ladies’ man, a real specimen of his sex, worthy of respect.
Again - a sense of underlying anxiety mixing itself with Dean thinking it's hot that Cas is being a Straight Guy.
It settles Dean into a pleasurable state of anticipation - his charge on his way to success and he himself seated comfortably with a beer in his hand and free to observe and savor him - the bar is lit up in cold light, modern. It flatters Cas’ features well, tones the blue of his eyes almost electric.
This is a reference to the visual style (especially the color grading) of season 4, btw.
Dean sips his beer and casually moves the jacket over his lap, allowing himself a brief moment of friction, and then settles in again, letting the want build under his skin.
The space this fic is playing in is one where it's debatable whether Dean likes to actually get off, but he really really likes being aroused and sitting with it.
Almost too soon, the woman is reaching into her bag, producing a scrap of paper and a pen. She writes the number down and gives it to Cas and Cas kisses her softly on the cheek, lips just barely brushing her skin - Dean observes the way she squeezes Cas’ wrist, red nails a sharp contrast against his pale skin.
Again Dean's kind of putting himself in her place, is kind of aroused by like, the signifiers of feminity...
Cas returns to their table, slight curl to his lip that is his equivalent of a rockstar grin. He hands the paper to Dean and their fingers brush, electric.
“Good job, buddy.”
Dean sets the paper down on the table without committing the number to memory, a successful conquest its own reward.
I did feel kind of bad for the lady, writing this...
“Ok, so here’s what’s gonna happen. I’m going to snatch up the last stall in the men’s room, and in ten minutes, you’re going to join me there. Try not to be super obvious about it.”
“Yes, Dean.”
Dean taps the scrap of paper with the lady’s phone number, “good job.”
He walks away, not even needing to look back to know that Cas is watching him all the way until he turns the corner.
The wait in the stall itself is excruciating - Dean squeezes his cock through jeans and listens for footsteps. They come in, confident at first but then falter in awkwardness before stopping at his stall. He opens the door and drags Cas in, Cas’ hands immediately seeking his hips. Now that Cas has made contact, he can’t seem to stop touching Dean - his wide palms roaming Dean’s body aimless and warm. Dean lets Cas give him a kiss on the cheek and then maneuvers him against the wall of the bathroom - pushing Cas away and sinking to his knees. He unbuttons Cas’ pants and pushes his cheek against Cas’ palm - he looks up. Cas is staring at him, so serious and solemn as always.
Cas is so puppy in this fic... pure force of horniness aimed at Dean, being disciplined and coralled by him... I think that's the core of the Cas side of this dynamic. He doesn't have to worry about his own desires, because Dean is fully in charge of them and doling out pleasure as a reward.
“You have to be quiet, yeah?”
I feel like Dean is too germophobe neurotic boy to blow Cas in a pub bathroom but he's doing it FOR ME.
Cas nods and runs his finger through Dean’s hair, scratching his scalp lightly and Dean shivers.
He pulls Cas’ cock out of his underwear and sucks it down, still only semi-hard. He is in no hurry, keeping it in his mouth and sucking softly, enjoying the way it fills out gradually. Cas smells like himself and the laundry powder Dean washes his clothes with, and the shower gel Dean buys in bulk, Dean inhales deeply through his nose and feels a deep sense of reassurance.
Mommy kink moment. Dean looooves the sense of control he gets from being in a caretaker position.
The hard tile is painful against his knees, but there is nowhere he would rather be - he’s so pleased and proud. Cas has the ladies wrapped around his little finger and it’s all thanks to Dean. In this little world of their own, Dean luxuriates in the feeling of soft skin in his mouth, in the taste that is Cas. Bobs his head, watches Cas swallow moans and look down in wonder, flushed and overcome with sensation. Dean did that too.
Again, this fic has such a sweet tone to me... like obviously Dean is kind of unhinged but you know, he has built up a set of parameters that allow him to be sweet to Cas...
Dean can tell Cas won’t last long - he sticks his hand into Cas’ underwear, brushing his fingers through the bristly hair, feeling the weight of Cas’ balls against his palm. He pushes the pads of his fingers against the muscle behind them, rubs the rim of Cas’ asshole. Cas’ hand tightens in Dean’s hair and he comes, filling up Dean’s mouth.
Honestly could have done a bigger focus on the sensory information here - you only get the hair and the weight here. I do like to imagine that, though :3
Dean swallows what he can and wipes the rest off with his thumb. He lets Cas slip out and then leans his cheek against Cas’ thigh, watching his dick grow soft. He grips Cas’ ankle lightly and rubs his thumb against the delicate bone, plans what challenge to present Cas with next.
When he doesn't get his dick out <3 I do want to say here that this fic was inspired by Life Skills - which is a fic about Dean and Cas fucking women because they want to fuck each other but Dean is being repressed. I was interested in exploring Dean as someone who has a circuitous approach to sex with Cas for many nebulous reasons that are not easily solved. This fic is not clear on how openly Dean is dating Cas but in my mind they wouldn't stop doing this even if Dean was openly calling Cas his boyfriend and holding his hand in public or whatever. Having sex this way fulfills multiple functions for Dean and Cas really doesn't mind - he primarily cares about being the center of Dean's attention, which he absolutely is, here.
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twinkpriest · 2 years ago
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Omg.... Please share your headcanons about the goth kids
>:3c mwahahaha i hope youre ready anon (cracks knuckles)
also i need share credit bc all of these were jointly created in my bf @lilachawk and i's dms <3
general:
their group chat is called "the cavern of darkness", they named it that in middle school and never changed it. any time they refer to it in verbal speech they just call is "the cavern"
they do secret santa every year. they draw names from michael's plastic viking helmet
they all definitely have their non-goth-music guilty pleasures but the main one they all have in common is lady gaga. her 2009 vma performance won their respect
they're still decent friends with stan and get invited to his birthday party every year. sometimes they go sometimes they don't
michael:
november scorpio
i'm gonna ignore how all of the houses in town are laid out because i firmly believe he has an attic bedroom. every wall/ceiling surface is covered in posters and stuff. full bookshelves, lots of tchotchkes, old concert ticket stubs, that kinda stuff. maximalism baby!!
gay gay homosexual gay
has a long haired black cat named bella (short for belladonna). rescued her from a snowstorm
him saying his parents were separated in raisins was just him being #edgy & his parents shown in gk3 are his actual parents. they never got divorced. he was raised interfaith jewish and buddhist. 
he has ehlers-danlos. i always give him ring splints in my drawings. the cane is actually needed sometimes
drives his dad's old camaro. the engine is really loud and it holds up like shit in the wintertime but he’s secretly really fond of the car
got a part time job at the only respectable record store in town junior year
pete:
water sign. pisces or cancer
only child of a single father who does construction work. his dad doesn't quite understand the goth thing but he's supportive
bi king. had a normie girlfriend in highschool. not for long, but it was still a very weird experience for everyone involved
super into comics, esp indie stuff. dream job is definitely to be a comic book artist
if the shirt+bolo tie wasn't a giveaway, he's lowkey into western vibes/influences. he probably has one of those old dramatically fringed suede jackets that he found in a local goodwill
really puts the Y in diy, probably the best & most creative out of the 4 of them when it comes to altering clothes and making accessories and shit
bites his nails/picks his skin
has a pet rat named boris
a little transmasc pilled if u ask me....
henrietta:
probably a virgo
mean lesbian <3
she stays designated driver for most of high school but later on, her and michael kinda divvy up friend group driving responsibilities. she is still the default though, because when michael drives she’s an intense backseat driver
she drives her mom's horrible subaru most of the time but she 100% would be the person to save up and buy a hearse as her daily car
is always the first to hear about local shows. she just knows people
i looooove the recurring thing in fics where she is the one to dye pete's hair. she does the sally’s run & dyes/trims his hair and in exchange he fixes rips in her clothes or superglues the soles back onto her shoes or something like that 
loves those new age crystal incense dragon hippie stores you see in malls. secretly likes the cool fairy statues they sell in them
firkle:
april aries
SUPER into vulture culture. has too many bones and not enough space for them
likes harsh noise music. calms him down
sends the strangest, most esoteric memes in the group chat and the rest of them have no idea where he finds them or what they mean
sorry i have like nothing else for firkle he kinda eludes me
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bookhighlightss · 6 months ago
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Once upon a broken heart trilogy book review
★ Once upon a broken heart
1. Oh my lord he's just so fine. So hot. So sarcastic. If you couldn't tell already I love him. So much.
2. Okay um can I just say I hate one thing about Evangeline is that she has this "saviour I'm too nice" complex and tbh I don't fw that. SPOILERS AHEAD.
There's this scene where they are in a vampire's lair and she sees her ex lover or wtv and she wants to save him and jacks is all THIS IS A BAD IDEA DON'T FALL FOR IT and she obv like the main character she is goes like nooooo I will like girll fuck off he's a changeling nothing good will come out of this and quite obv he wants to bite her and jacks to save her gets his aarse bitten and shes like oh no I fucked up LIKE NO SHIT SHERLOCK YOU'RE SAVIOUR COMPLEX IS SHOWING but yea thas one thing that ticked me off.
SPOILERS ENDED.
3. Okay this book got me Outta my reading slump and it's like 300 pages so it's short and I finished it in 4 hrs so like I'd recommend this if you're like in a mood for a quick read.
4. The plot twists are twisting and it's so good with like the most shocking pcs of information and the way Evangeline pieces things together and it's just like damn everything's clicking now.
5. Lastly the " little " in front of the fox gets to me but the age gap is gapping ( iykyk ). Altho I think the book should have been lengthier considering the amt of things going on so it could be more descriptive but ig it's good bcs it's going so fast?
★ The ballad of never after
1. If I was crazy over the first book , I am absolutely psychotic over this book.
2. Okay so the first book they didn't have that much chemistry but oh god the second book made up for it in so many ways.
3. This is prolly the first book in reading which has the perfect slowburn like damn
4. SPOILERS AHEAD. OKAY SO the scene where he decides that saving Eva was more important than changing the timeline to meeting his love and not getting it wrong this time ...fuckkk that played with my heart like he knew he could never get that back and he was ready to still sacrifice his needs for eva only for her to lose her memories holy shitttt
SPOILERS ENDED.
5. Okay so at the end of the first book and the whole second book I felt SO FREAKING BAD for apollo I was like noooo I can't handle this triangle but thennn Apollo was like hehe I'm gonna be a little bitch so then I am so ready for when he gets killed if he gets killed bcs I need that man's head on the dagger desperately. He pulled the most heartless shit ever when eva went thru hell and back for him.
★ The curse of true love
1. Can I just say this book did not give what it was supposed to??? Like the chemistry just got lesser???
2. Okay the dagger scene was so hot tho. And the inn scene bcs damn.
3. Okay the way Evangeline remembered wasn't like SCENEMATIC enough ykwim??? Like I was expecting so much more and that was so less???
4. Okay one I'm more interested in lala's story??? Bcs genuinely what's going on there??
5. I HATE APOLLO. If I thought I was hating him in book 2 then it was loathe in book 3 for me. He just became so sick and twisted like it made me pukish. Kinda disappointed in the book but the last few chapters made up for it ig so yea
Overall I think the book needs HEAVY editing for it to give what it's supposed to?? Like ig the book is too short for such an intense plot I feel like Stephanie could've taken so much more out of this book than she did. And a part of me was waiting for eva to eventually become badass but she always stays the naive damsel in distress girl which kinda got to me bcs I'm all for super lit characters and a few things remain a mystery in this series. Like he's immortal she's not?? What are they gonna do?? She has magic in her blood and thas it?? They couldn't milk it further to make her super badass?? Overall plot is amazing but the story should have been written better
ALSO SUPER MEGA SIDE NOTE THAT CHANGES MY PERSPECTIVE OF THE BOOKS AND STEPHANIE GARBER
She's a Zionist. I just found that out when I was going thru Goodreads review and now I've got the ick bcs till now I was boycotting authors who are Zionist and to find out you just read a book by a zio just makes me sick to my stomach. I really this is a lie or sumn bcs I can't find any posts on twitter tt Tumblr and ig where it says shes a zio so idk I just saw a comment that said she's a zio and thas all so idk. Zionist authors immediately make me change perspective of the book. Was gonna read caraval but not anymore.
UPDATE did my research and found out she is promoting Sarah j mass who is a very proud Zionist among other things therefore it's an ick either way. Not reading caraval
Overall id give the series a 8.5/10
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iwtvdramacd18 · 1 year ago
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How are youu 🫧 What is like your favorite scene(s) from the show? What part of the show made you be like 'yeah I'll dedicate a portion of my life to this' ...like what hooked you? 😊 Hope you're well 🩵🩵🩵🫧🫧
Ok I gotta think about fav scenes overall later bc there's so much to go through and I have to rewatch soon anyway BUT in terms of when I knew I was hooked it kinda came in stages...
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when he did this little chuckle here that's when I first felt chills and truly that's the moment I got hooked but I wasn't ready to admit it to myself yet.
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Then the Lestat intro scene I was like waaaaaait are they actually committing to him being a piece of shit like we aren't playing games here and then. and THEN the fucking white black cinnamon I had to pause the show and like wheeze violently.
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PAULLLLL I LOVE PAULLLL I talked about Lestat in this scene already but Paul was the other half that made this scene and also a sizable part of my enjoyment in the pilot as well
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the way he just went in on those paw pads like he was HUNGRY for them
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"You ain't gonna do it! You ain't gonna do it!" It's sooooo important to me that they showed the whole family in a scene of happiness and joy and especially that we see Paul being able to smile and dance and be happy too
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I was crying laughing at this I'm ngl
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And then I cried for reallllllll
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Ready for wedding vows <3. but also I love how unapologetically feral this introduction to vampirism is like its interesting to compare this and the other kills in the season and then the finale returning to this level
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There's like this very intense sadness with how he describes the sound of Lestat's heart and his. Like he's describing a death... Louis says SO many things he doesn't actually mean and it's what makes his character so incredible the fact you really have to look past a lot of what he's physically saying to get at the meat of the meanings of his words behind them and once this scene started I was like ok FINE I GUESS I LIKE IT A LOT.....
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rose-tinted-juls · 1 year ago
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holy shoot i wasn't ready for this. of course i couldn't wait to read it, not longer than 24h after finishing pt.2, i just needed to continue this story
1. this was INSTENSE intense. whoa. i need a cold shower now.
2. i have to address this first before going deeper into my commentary... WHO DO YOU LOVE??? i'm gonna be thinking about this for every waking second of my days until i can read further. (also why did the old ass conor maynard song with the same name start in my head bf of this line lmao)
3. carlos being so happy to see her in his clothing 😭 also how it feels natural for them to cuddle on the sofa and feeling safe warm and happy I'M NOT OKAY
4. NO NOT THE BLONDIE ARRIVING WHEN SHE LEAVES </3 why does every man have to break her heart???
5. when she wakes up to music playing in their house... i wanna wake uo to charles playing piano too :(( it's him right? -> later addition: it is him 😭
6. CHARLES BRAIDING HER HAIR AND CHANGING HER AND JUST BEING SO CARING 😭😭😭 i'm so torn btw these two men now idk how she manages to live 😭
7. "he'd clouded your emotions, nothing was black-and-white with your husband, just a cacophony of colors." such a gorgeous line, it pulls my heartstrings and makes me stupidly emotional. the writing talent!!!
8. "yet... he had given up his mistress for you. he'd given up something that made him happy because you were not." now THAT was phrased perfectly. honestly. so so so good.
9. pascale loving her so much 😭😭😭 it's curing me. helping me heal. <333 also, "she had grown to adore you; your mannerisms, laughter and the fact that you clearly held a candle for charles, despite the dwindling flame of the marriage." THIS LINE!!!! LEAVE SOME TALENT FOR THE REST OF US JAY THIS SHOULD BE ILLEGAL!!! oh and ofc let's not forget about "if she had a daughter, she'd want her to be just like you." i'm sobbing 😭
10. "hello beautiful" and "hello handsome" AHHHH SCREAMING CRYING also charles grinning even harder hearing this and even her being surprised she said that and him instantly loving it and forgetting everything (flower and dress) THIS IS EVERYTHING TO ME
11. "something tells me that won't fit you, charles." this deserved its own mention bc i actually snorted reading this and i love a fic that achieves that in me
12. UH OH CARLOS PLAYING DIRTY NOW ARE WE jesus h roosevelt christ the scene in his driver's room is the death of me
13. charles winning a race made me actually get teary eyed and start sniffing bc i just want him to win something so bad finally that even if it's only in a fic i start crying in happiness 😭😭
14. carlos holding her to him when they are in public AND charles noticing it PAIN. for both of them.
15. i'm in such an inner conflict rn, idk really how she can cope bc this is hurting. this is painful. i love them both sm :'( part of me wants her to give charles a second chance and allow them to be a happily married couple but another part is telling me that charles played his chance and broke her in many ways and carlos was there for her always and she would be so happy with him and like WHICH ONE TO CHOOSE 😭
am i okay? no and yes. at the same time. no bc of this conflict in me and yes bc i could read this. SPEECHLESS. this talent of yours is truly out of this world, main spot in a fancy bookstore kind of perfect. i feel privileged to have read something like this story.
You Think, You Know | CL16 & CS55
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Summary: Some bridges are due to burn, whilst others are destined to mend. Charles wants to lead you into a traditional happily-ever-after, whilst Carlos is still adamant that he can always treat you better. Part 3 of ‘A House, A Home.’
Word Count: 11.3k
Warnings: angst, shouting, a lot of swearing, mentions of cheating and divorce. SMUT. Non-protected sex, oral (M&F receiving,) squirting, degradation, aftercare always.
Note: Thank you all so, SO much for being so patient with me. I really wanted this to be something special and I hope you all enjoy it. Please don't get mad at me because this one is emotional. A massive thank you to my biggest cheerleaders, @oconso, @formulaforza, @a-distantdreamer & @silverstonesainz - I love you all so much.
PART 1: A House, A Home | PART 2: Where Do We Go? | PART 3: 'You Think, You Know'
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You loved your sleep.
There was never too much that could wake you from your slumber. Currently, with the combined sensations of crisp sheets tucked across your frame, soft sunlight drawing through the transparent curtains of the bedroom and snug, strapping arms encircling your waist, it would have to be some form of miracle to awaken you.
The form of this came in the body pressed tightly into your back; smoothly, a pair of lips are drawn to your cheekbone, satin kisses being dropped against your skin. Was it possible to awaken to such a soothing interaction? Your face is drawn to the feeling, turning in his interlocked arms, the side of your face nuzzling into the cushion as your eyes meet the deep, dark pools of his. 
“Good morning.” Carlos whispers, joyful at your rise from shuteye. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been lying there himself, simply basking in the pleasure of holding the girl of his dreams against his firm body. The man was constantly on a lifeline; each time you interacted with him, he’s certain it would be his last, that one day, you’ll be violently ripped from his arms and his heart. 
Suspended in thought, the Spainard is drawn back to reality with the glowing touch of your palm on his skin. Immediately, one of his arms draws away from your waist, resting his own larger hand atop of yours. You look alluring like this; sleep still decorates your eyes, hair tangled from the deep sleep, yet perfect in every sense of the word. 
“Morning.” You respond, allowing yourself to set your gaze upon his face for a little longer. It’s a sin, settling in your stomach at how that same face had lifted from between your leg’s mere hours ago, the remanence of your arousal ever-present atop his stubble. You were certain he had a mouth crafted by the angels, the way his lips had toyed with your most sensitive parts and the way they currently pulled into an enticing smile in the present. 
Two bodies, two souls were entwined in that bed; you weren’t too sure how long you lay there alongside him, reveling in one another’s morning appearances. All you know in that moment is Carlos is overtaking your mind, sprinting through every vein in your body. Every unanswered question from the previous night rendered numb as the man leant forward in your touch, his lips gaining space on your own. 
There’s a sudden, sharp buzz from the other room, causing you both to retract from one another, bodies deep in the king-size mattress. A chuckle leaves his own mouth, running a heavy hand across his face, heart still pounding from the sudden jump of sound in the silent apartment. Something in your heart told you that buzz was for you. Whining from the sudden loss of warmth, you remove yourself from the bundle of blankets and body heat, bare feet padding into his living room, aware of your mobile phone, resting atop of the counter. 
The device gave a heavy buzz once more before you had the realization to pick it up, the battery barely there. You absent-mindedly call out to the man in the bedroom, asking if he had a phone charger you could borrow for a little while. There's clutter from the other room, clearly trying to find a space for your own phone. Whilst that incurred, your eyes flickered across the darkening screen, skin turning cold upon reading the text notifications. 
02:51: Charles Leclerc
I’m in love with you.
02:53: Charles Leclerc
I’m so sorry she was there – I had no idea. She’s gone now, can I come and collect you? Where are you?
03:25: Charles Leclerc
Please let me know you’re safe as soon as you can. Can I come and see you in the morning, please?
08:47: Charles Leclerc
Good morning, my love. How are you feeling today?
Guilt washed through your stomach, not for the interaction you had shared with Carlos; Charles had done substantially worse to you for the past twelve months. No, you knew what it felt like to have no response from somebody you cared for, terrified for their well-being. Even when Charles hadn’t cared for you, you had still nursed him, waiting up for his return in the early hours of the morning. 
With the remainder of your phone battery, fingers fly over the keyboard. Did you want your husband to come and collect you, specifically from his teammates home? He was aware of your building friendship with the Spainard, even if it wasn’t entirely platonic. There wasn’t a huge choice; you especially didn’t want to demand or pry a lift off Carlos, especially after he had come to collect you so late the previous night. 
08:58: You
Good morning, I’m at Carlos’ place. I’d really appreciate a lift back to the house, if that’s okay. 
The message barely had time to send before it’s marked as ‘read’. Immediately, the blue speech bubble pops to the lower corner of your phone, signaling a response was being formed.
09:00: Charles Leclerc
You don’t need to even ask. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. 
Fifteen minutes was not enough time to conceal everything which had happened in the previous hours. Feet now cold, legs now littered in goosebumps, you’d scrambled back into his bedroom, the man now on his own feet, those damn gray jogging bottoms hanging on his hips, a visible outline ever-present. It took your entire soul to remain strong, knowing how tempting this man could become in a matter of moments. 
“Charles is on the way.” You state, suspecting that it would cease all his movements, and allow yourself to get ready for your husband’s arrival. Instead, he’d stepped closer to your frame, leaning his toned torso towards you, locking you in his muscled arms, hiding his face in the skin he’d licked and bitten across the previous night. His mumbles are incoherent, littering across your neck in broken Spanish. He’s saying something. Something you can’t understand but is undeniably a plea for you to stay in his arms. 
Carlos stays pretty much attached to you the entire time you’re preparing for your departure; his body is pressed against yours, littering kisses to the crown of your head whilst you brush your teeth. His scent is so dominating on the hoodie he insists you borrow, slipping that atop of your frame whilst pulling on the bottoms you had wiggled out of the previous evening. The man’s heart explodes upon seeing you bundled into his clothing, a possessive streak striking through his body and soul. 
When your bag is packed, face washed and phone charging, now on the counter of his kitchen, you spend the last few minutes waiting for your husband’s adamant arrival by bundling into Carlos’ side on his plush sofa. It feels entirely natural by this point; his arms encircle your waist, letting you lie against his sternum, soothing yourself to his naturally steady heartbeat. A snippet of your heart desires to take this sole moment and capture it for a lifetime. Safe. Warm. Happy. 
The moment is wafted away from you both with the sudden rapping of knuckles on the front door. Whining, your eyes trail on the Spaniard, focused as he presses a final, fleeting kiss to your temple, pulls himself up from the couch and paces towards the hallway. Your own ears strain to hear the latch lift of the front door, Charles praises for looking after you the previous evening falling over his lips, two pairs of footsteps drawing into the front room. 
Your husband, despite his usual god-like appearance, looked terrible. His hair pushed to the front, clearly in need of a wash and brush. His skin was rubbed raw, face bloodshot; clearly, he hadn’t got a single moment of sleep the previous night, still dressed in the clothes he’d traveled home in the previous night. Despite the heavy lids of his eyes, they still light up when falling onto you. 
“Good morning.” He gives you a smile, only you. You can feel Carlos’ disappointment, even if you can’t see his eyesight at that moment. A pocket-sized smile from your own lips is offered in return, pulling yourself up in that moment, reaching for your bag which remained on the floor, slipping into your soft sneakers.
“Are you ready?” You’d asked softly. Charles’ mouth opened, hesitating before he spoke. He was thinking clearly. 
“I just need to speak to Carlos quickly. Something…private.” He tries to explain his standings, tries to make you feel less awkward as he reaches for the car keys resting in his hoodie pocket. “Are you okay to wait in the car?” He asks softly. He feels in no power to demand your movements, yet he requires one private word with his teammate. 
Your eyes don’t bother to meet Charles, instead immediately flying to meet the dark ones of your unofficial lover. What on god’s earth was your husband about to ask, and why did he want to do it out of your earshot? The look that you give the man says a thousand words, asking if he needs you to stay, hold your ground against Charles. The warm eyes of him give everything you need, silently promising he could handle this man. An entire conversation through looks alone, a skill the two of you had developed so naturally. 
Silently, you take the keys from Charles’ outstretched hand, skin flinching when being pressed against the cool metal. You don’t so much as glance in his direction when you’re walking to the counter, picking up your phone and stuffing it into the pouch of your borrowed hoodie. When turning on your heel, you pace back to Carlos, pressing a surprising kiss to his right cheek, murmuring a ‘Thank You,’ just for his hospitality, of course. You had done all the thanking for the number of orgasms you were granted the previous night. 
The walk towards your husband’s car, the SUV rather than his identifiable Pista, your mind clouded, clotted with an array of questions. Why did Charles need to speak to Carlos alone? Was he aware of the relationship the two had been sharing for an undefinable amount of time? Who on earth was the blonde woman giving you a death stare as she walked up the pathway to the complex, red lips practically hissing at your appearance, storming past you within half a second?
When you turn back to take in her appearance from behind, a sense of sickness settles into your stomach. You’d seen the back of that blonde head before; not in person, but rather on a phone screen. Your phone screen, held between white knuckles as you’d watched the man you had begun to fall for wrap his arms around another woman's lips meshed in a private nightclub, unaware of the multiple cameras capturing their searing moment. 
That was the same woman, identical in her mannerisms. You felt your tummy curdle into pain, into your vague realization that the only reason Carlos had offered you a place in his home, and subsequently his bed that evening, was because he was trying to fill a void until she returned to the scene. Your stomach wanted nothing more than to empty its remaining content in sheer shock. Instead, you breathe deeply, unlocking the door to the car, climbing into the passenger seat and closing your eyes, relaxing into the plush leather of the upholstery. 
You’re not sure how long your husband takes, eyes growing heavy as you await his return. It’s only realized when the driver’s door clicks open, rolling in your seat to watch as Charles climbs into his own, a frown resting at the bottom of his face. However, it’s immediately vanquished when his eyes latch onto your own, grinning at your presence, so close to him. A warm hand reaches out, brushing over the back of your head, sheerly enjoying the comfort you radiated. He'd been lost without you for the past twelve hours. 
Your eyes begin to feel heavy again, though you’re determined to get through the car ride alert, even if the soft scent of his cologne and the gentle lulling tunes from the morning radio are drawing you back to your previous state. Instead, you think of that woman. No, not the mistress you had grown numb to; the blonde woman, the one pressed against Carlos’ chest and lips mere hours after you had been. The glint in your husband’s eye is telling as you go through your endless thoughts, he knows something. 
“The blonde lady going into Carlos’ apartment.” Your voice is completely out of pocket, echoing through the front of the SUV. “Who was she?” There’s no beating around with the question you had asked; there’s no trying to sugar coat what you needed to know. Charles knows it, too. He knows he can’t hide the truth from you, you’re too smart for lies and manipulation, a year married with a mistress had taught him that.
Instead, he emits a deep sigh from his lips, knuckles tightening on the steering wheel as he focuses on the road. “Natasha.” The name falls from his lips, he can’t meet your gaze, not when speaking about another woman to his wife. “She used to work for Ferrari’s PR but left just under a year ago. Carlos and her used to-“ 
“Date?” You’d cut him off without realizing, eyes widening when he’d shaken his head. 
“No, not date.” He responds. “They just had…a thing. Something.” He finished his train of thought, still not mentally ready to turn to you. In a comforting way, you were glad he hadn’t; Charles was unable to see the tears pooling at your lower lash line, the desire to rip off the hoodie now suffocating your body. You learnt in your heart that moment, you were apparently nothing special to Carlos. No, he had a thing. Something, with any woman who passed his way was as a wandering fancy. 
The tears decorating your eyes and desire to relax into the leather seat eventually overpowers your emotionally drained body, pulling you back into a slumber. 
You loved the sound of music.
A faint tune, one you were certain you’d never heard before lured through your ears, drawing you back to consciousness. You couldn’t remember getting home, let alone getting out of the car and tucking yourself into the comfort of your own bed. Groaning, you’d sat yourself up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes and stretching the twinge in your back simultaneously. 
The music wasn’t coming from your room; the sound was beautiful, you just needed to locate its source. Your feet twinge when they touch the floor, cool floorboards easing the temperature of your socks. Opening the ajar door to your bedroom, the music grows louder, sound clearly emitting from downstairs, your feet carry you to the staircase with no hesitation. However, when reaching the top of the staircase, eyebrows crease together in confusion, taking in your once-ragged appearance in the crystal mirror. 
Your hair had been braided, albeit not elegantly, but at least out of your face, something you did almost religiously before sleeping. Your attire had changed, too, once you were dressed in Carlos’ sage hoodie. Now, your body was engulfed by Charles’ charcoal jumper, sleeves too long but an entire comfort for your drained mind. Is this what it felt like, to be nurtured and cared for by your husband? The pit of your stomach felt airy; this had been everything you desired for so long. And yet, now you had experienced somebody else, despite the heartbreak, your mind was utterly torn. 
Music grows louder, your mind is suddenly focused back on its original target. With no hesitation now, you began to walk down the flight of stairs, noting your bag and phone resting by the front door. Even with as many notifications as you’d missed in your time asleep, priorities overtook, making your way towards the lounge, eyes transfixed on the figure by the French windows.
Charles Leclerc sat, comfortably and quietly, gentle fingers dancing over the keys of his piano. The soft lights of the room illuminated the figure, a tune you had never heard was fluttering around the open space. 
Of course, you had heard him play the instrument multiple times; during his time spent at the house rather than on the track, he remained transfixed, creating new songs, finding some way to pour every emotion into some kind of melody. You’d lost track of the times you’d come downstairs to get a drink, put the washing into the machine and had instead pushed your body into the doorframe, eyes fixed upon your husband as he created the most beautiful sounds. 
The last time you’d done that, his mistress had been present, leaving over the piano as Charles played her an elegant tune. When she had gone to lean over him, her own fingers wanting to press down against the keys, he’d rested a firm hand on her arm, insisting that she sit on the sofa and listen, instead. The sweet moments of silently viewing your husband had turned sour; you’d silently vowed that day you would never enter the room when he was playing again.
You’d broken that promise mere seconds ago, eyes transfixed upon your husband. You can feel the tension beneath his fingers, as if he’s trying to take the sheer thoughts of everything that had been embedded into his mind in the past twenty-four hours and mesh them into some kind of audible release. Underneath the layers of music, your footsteps can’t be heard as you hesitantly walk towards the end of the living space. His tune reaches a climax, but before the piano can take any more notes, you cough lightly, Charles’ hands ceasing in mid-air. Arching his body weight, he sees your frame standing next to his piano, eyes still sleepy from awakening mere moments ago. The breath catches in the back of his throat; did you always look so perfect in his soft jumpers?
“I’m sorry.” He eventually offers, taking in your sweet, soft appearance. “Did I wake you?” 
“No, no.” The reply tumbles from your lips before you even realize. “It was…beautiful, actually. Is it a new piece?” You ask, entranced by the music which had been flowing freely.
“I’m not sure yet.” He can’t help but smile at the end of his sentence. “I just sort of started playing and this is what came of it.” The explanation is valid; like many creatives, sometimes a free flow form was the simplest way to go. His next movement is almost a shock to your system. “Why don’t you come and help me?” The offer is completed when he shuffles up on the piano stool, patting on hand on the available gap. There’s hesitation in your movement, before his hand trails upwards, leaning to clasp one of your own, guiding you towards the stool. 
There’s an overpowering smell of his cologne, a scent you were slowly drawing yourself towards. The body heat from his frame radiates into your own. Shyly, you reach out, pressing down on one of the piano keys, a tone spouting from the instrument. Charles can’t help but smile upon your interaction, eyes questioning as you analyze the instrument.
“Do you know how to play?” He asks gingerly, watching as you shake your head in response. His actions exchange, resting one of his warm palms over your own. The next moments are filled with your husband guiding your hands over the piano, teaching you the tune to old nursery rhymes. When you reach the end of the piece, he cheers in delight at the achievement. 
“Play me something now.” You ask carefully, head becoming heavy, heavy enough to rest on your husband’s shoulder. When you feel his body tense, you immediately sit back up, convinced you’ve overstepped a line. That thought is soon relinquished when Charles’ hand flies out, wrapping around the back of your head and pulling you back down to his shoulder, your breath hot on his neck, it’s enough for him, hesitant to overstep the boundaries you were adamant upon currently. 
His fingers move back, continuing the song he had been conducting earlier. The piece had started out slowly, almost sad-like, before building, building towards a romantic counterpart. In his mind, it was the perfect song to punctuate the relationship he maintained with his wife. They both sat there, barely any moment as the music was the only sound present in their house. 
When the song finishes, neither of you move, relishing in the soft touch you’re both sharing. Charles’ own head falls atop of your own, letting his cheek rest against your hair. There’s no form of time between you both, simply enjoying being alive, alive with one another. It’s interrupted when you feel Charles’ take an exaggerated breath, removing his keys from the piano. One of his hands rests upon his side, the other slides between the minute gap between you both, wrapping a toned arm around your waist. The movement causes you to lift yourself from his firm shoulder, catching those beautiful eyes from your glance. 
“I’m traveling to Monaco tomorrow.” He says it so casually, as if it’s as normal as entering or leaving the building. You can feel his heart race in anticipation of what he was due to say, his body temperature raising dramatically, radiating through his hoodie. You offer him a warming smile. You really didn’t want him to leave, not when you were growing so unnaturally fond of his presence. 
“Oh really, what for?” Is the eventual reply. In this moment, you simply can’t hold his eye contact, he’s staring into your soul, it’s as if he can sense every thought which is currently trekking through your mind; does he know how much of a hold he has on you, even if your marriage was entirely staged, at least in his eyes. 
“I’m off to see my mother” He clarifies. “It’s been a while and I just want to check in.” It’s a lie. You can tell from the way his body language changes; his hands are suddenly clenching tighter, his grip on your waist firm as if he’s terrified, you’ll run away. He can’t admit it, he’s not strong enough. If you step away, he will fall back to the way he was the previous night; eyes bloodshot, unable to sleep unless he knows you’re safe. 
“Give her my best.” The response is blunt, short. You’re on entirely different wavelengths, different planets. He never told you of his reasoning for things; a golden rule you had learnt at the beginning of this era. Just…you’d never question him; you would simply co-exist. What he says next makes your blood run cold. 
“Why don’t you come with me? I’d really appreciate it.” Why on earth would your estranged husband want you to come on his travels, presumably when the entire point was to spend the entirety of it wrapped in the arms of another woman. Yet, a feeling in your stomach settled. Did you actually want to spend hours in this empty house alone? Now that Carlos was no longer a welcome distraction, anything would be better than wallowing in your silence. 
“I will.” You eventually respond. “On one condition.”
“Anything.” His eyes are wide, so willing. He’d scooted tighter towards you, as if he could hold together this entire conversation, stopping the whole world from crumbling around you. You must be the one to take a deep breath this time. You had to remain firm with your choices, with what you needed to know. 
“What was in the white envelope that your mistress gave you yesterday?”
You loved the glow of candlelight. 
Having never entered Charles’ study, his fingers interlocked with your own as he guided you through the heavy door, you didn’t realize how many candles he had resting around his office. They laid upon his windowsill, on his desk, he even had a mulberry-scented candle resting next to his racing simulator. 
There was only one candle which was lit, he had obviously forgotten to extinguish it whilst you were deep in your slumber. Despite the fact you hadn’t ever been given access to this room, you’d have to make a mental note in order to check for any fire hazards the next time you were in the building alone. 
The envelope resting upon the desk stuck out like a sore thumb; his computer, stationary, it was all a cool gray tone whereas the envelope stuck out in a bright white glow. 
“I need you to know before you look at this, it’s a lot worse than it comes across.” Even in the candlelight, his face had turned pale, barely able to keep his fear from dancing across his emotions. You need to remain strong. You need to see what was left in the envelope. 
Staying firm, your grasp reaches out towards the desk, taking the card into your own hands. “I want to see it.” You clarified, letting your finger trace under the flap of the envelope.
You don’t let your husband’s words overpower you, distract you in any way. Instead, your hand reaches into the envelope and grasps around a stack of…something. It feels like multiple pieces of paper pressed together, though one side remains glossy, as if printed onto a special sheet. Hesitantly, your hand pulls from the envelope, eyes immediately widening upon seeing the content in question.
It's photographs. Multiple photographs of Charles and his mistress. Some of them are casual, taken from her phone, smiling selfies and dinner dates. Others are…compromising, verging on pornographic. You can feel the lump in your throat tightening, tears are forming on your lower lash line, but you must keep strong. You cannot show any weakness when you ask to see this.  
“That’s her, isn’t it?” Your voice betrays you, weakening as your words continue. “Your…girlfriend.” You don’t want to use the other word; it’s clear from these photographs it was more than sex, it was more than just an escapade. 
“She’s- she’s not anymore.” Charles pauses, his eyes don’t focus on the photographs, only on you. His wife, who he has hurt so badly and now must see the pain littered across her face. “She hasn’t been since your mother passed away.”
Your heart stops at the mention of your mother, a sharp spike of longing for the woman suddenly danced through your chest. Then, you were angry. How dare he pity you, you didn’t want it, not from him. But…you still wanted him. He’d clouded your emotions, nothing was black-and-white with your husband, just a cacophony of colors. 
“That was your reason for dumping her. Sympathy?” You don’t care how harsh your voice comes across, instead just aggravated you were growing to care about his reasoning. Life had been simpler weeks ago, when you simply stayed at home, minding your own business whilst he got on with his. By the look on Charles’ face, he wasn’t expecting the hostility, either. 
“No! I dumped her because it was wrong, because I have a loving wife who I would give anything for.” The room goes silent, giving you time to process the words that had come from his lips. You had been so certain for so long that he didn’t care about you; that everything he did was for his own gain and pleasure. Yet…he had given up his mistress for you. He’d given up something that made him happy because you were not. 
Stressing, you run a hand through your hair, placing the photographs back into the envelope, speaking to your husband as you place the card back onto his desk. You feel sick. These photographs exist and it was a perfect way to destroy the two of you, it was perfect ammunition to a metaphorical pistol. “So, what does she want you to do with these photographs?”
“Nothing.” Charles leans over your own body, reaching for a second stack of papers resting upon the desk, one you had considered would simply be notes from Scuderia Ferrari. Warm seeps through your body at his close contact, one hand almost trailing against your back as he grasps to the stack of crisp sheets, barely touched.  “She’s threatened to publish them if I don’t sign…this.” 
You took the stack of ivory papers into your palms. It was sprawled with a size twelve font, you were uncertain of where to begin until two words in bold took your attention, printed formally across the top of the page. 
“Divorce Papers.” Your voice is barely a whisper, heart dropping to your stomach. 
“That’s the other reason I’m going to Monaco.” He’s explaining his own status now, eyes glassy with the fear of you walking straight out of the office. He wouldn’t blame you, of course. He couldn’t blame you for anything anymore. Charles reaches out to your grasp, wiggling the paper from your fingers and placing them back against the desk.  “I’m filing for a lawsuit against her, a restraining order for manipulation and stalking.” 
A scoff falls from your lips; the mere contrast of the events from a few weeks ago compared to now. He truly intended to file a lawsuit against a woman who he’d happily let warm his bed whilst you went to bed each night with nothing but regret and bloodshot eyes. “Do you…do you want a divorce?” You can feel your voice cracking. “I mean, if she’s sent you these, you must have mentioned wanting one-”
“I did.” Charles doesn’t miss a beat. “I mentioned how I didn’t want a divorce because despite everything…I do care for you.” The room goes silent, not even the flickering of the candle or the soft wind from the French windows can pierce the tone of the room. 
A huff escapes your lips, arms resting by your side as you formulate a response; “You had a really weird way of showing it.” Your response is blunt, it clearly warrants the sad look on your husband’s face. 
“I know. That’s why I’m going to make it right. Please come to Monaco with me. She won’t be there; you don’t have to come to the lawyer with me. But…I need to be able to come back to my wife.” His hand reaches out, cradling your own in this moment. Gently, he lifts your palm to his cheek, resting it upon his stubble and letting his lips trace a kiss across the soft skin. 
He truly does know how to make your heart flutter, despite everything. 
“Okay.” You eventually respond, focused on his gaze when his eyes turn wide in anticipation. 
“Yeah?” His heart is picking up in happiness, reaching to hold you in his own grasp, but instead falling short when you raise a finger, ceasing his movements towards your body. 
“But…you need to give me tonight, alone. To process that.” Gently, you take a step forward, leaning gently towards him. You can’t leave him, not before you gently press a kiss to his cheek, turning on your heel, your figure illuminated in the corridor by the soft candlelight. “Goodnight, Charles.”
“Goodnight, beautiful.” 
You loved the feeling of warm water.
There is only a slender picking of moments in your life where you have felt truly relaxed; sitting by the lake in the rolling fields your family had owned for generations, lounging in the bed of the Madrid-Based apartment your friends had hired for a holiday in the early spring morning. 
You had never thought one of those relaxing moments would be as your mother-in-law massaged her hands through your locks, lathering an expensive shampoo into the roots of your hair. She was gentle; no tangles fell through her fingers as her rhythm stayed perfectly relaxing, hitting all the spots which would send a flood of relief through your scalp. 
You’d arrived in Monaco early that morning, immediately being transported to the luxurious hotel your husband had booked you into. Most of the trips he’d book you wouldn’t attend, and when you did would be ignored by him altogether. This time, he’d remained present, willing. Your hands had entwined the moment you had left the privacy of the jet, nestling into the back of the car, eyes heavy from the early rise.
Not much is remembered after you’d arrived outside the opulent building; bags were removed and transported to your room by the bellhop, both you and your husband were given hotel cards, an older lady at the desk explaining the functions dotted around the high-end establishment. All you could remember was the door to the room opening, your tired body making a beeline towards the emperor bed, nuzzling into the soft furnishings with sleep overtaking you in a matter of moments. 
Charles hadn’t been able to help the tug on his heartstrings as he’d seen you tumble into the mattress. You’d been so thoughtful; dropping everything back at your house and accompanying him to Monaco, promising to be there for him as he promised to fix the wounds from his previous mistakes. He’d give anything to crawl into the bed alongside you, wrap his frame around your own and fall back into his own slumber, one he had despised the night before simply because he wasn’t able to hold you in his arms. He was learning to respect your wishes; after all, he had a lot of repairing to do-so. Even after recent conversations with his Ferrari counterpart, he could never bring himself to hate you. 
His phone buzzes from his back pocket and upon inspection he sees the reminder, he’s due with his lawyer in less than forty-five minutes, but he doesn’t want to leave you, not alone. A thought sparks into his head, fingers flying through his contacts and dropping a message to one, asking if they could take you over to his mother’s salon later in the afternoon. By the time he’s returned from changing in the en-suite and brushing a comb through his hair, the responses from both Joris and his mother had lit up his screen, confirming his plans for later in the afternoon. 
Your husband had allowed himself one more look at you, so peaceful wrapped up in the comfort of the bed. Silently, he leans over your frame, running a gentle hand across the back of your head, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your forehead, murmuring his sweet words to your sleeping form.
When you’d awoken, there was a message clarifying that Joris would be taking you to his mother’s salon a little later and he would come to collect you once he was finished with his lawyer. That’s how you had ended up walking into her salon earlier that afternoon, her delighted smile present after seeing her daughter-in-law.
Pascale wasn’t stupid, that much was clear. She was aware of the strain in her middle son’s marriage, just not to the extent that he had been toying with a mistress for the better part of a year. However, she had grown to adore you; your mannerisms, laughter and the fact that you clearly held a candle for Charles, despite the dwindling flame of the marriage. If she had a daughter, she’d want her to be just like you. 
“Are you and Charles up to anything this evening?” Her voice is gentle, motioning for you to stand up from the basin chair and walk towards the mirrors, resting yourself in one of the seats. Your reflection bores back into you, focused as Pascale adjusts your head slightly, brushing the tendrils of hair through her comb. 
“I’m not sure.” You respond. “I know he has some business this morning.” It’s an understatement. When Joris had collected you from the hotel, he’d tried to give you what information he could – Charles had arrived at his Lawyer’s office, ready to file the case against his mistress. He wasn’t too sure how long it was going to take, though he had told Joris to be on hand for anything you needed when he couldn’t. 
“You make him happy; you know?” Pascale mentions, tilting your head to angle your hair correctly. “I know he hasn’t always been…the greatest.” You’re not sure if she’s aware of everything, but her tone seems to stand where you need it to do so, “but you make…such an impact in his life.” 
Not much else is said whilst the woman continues to trim your hair, adjusting your face as she does so. It was nice, not to be cooped up into a hotel room for the entirety of the day, nor to be sitting in Charles’ driver room whilst he walked around, finger entwined with his mistress. You’re so engrossed in Pascale drying your hair, setting the locks into soft rollers that you don’t realize when the door chimes open, another figure entering the quiet salon. The woman’s eyes brighten, and you hear her cooing before your own face turns, taking in the figure of your husband in the doorway. 
Charles looks breath-taking. He’d clearly showered and changed since you had last seen him bundled in his travel gear that morning. Your deduction would be correct; the man had hastily returned to the hotel to jump into the shower, changing into a power blue shirt and white trousers. His hair, free of styling products curled in an unruly way, one that made his whole face structure elevate. 
In his hands, he held both a soft white dress over his arm, one you had packed in your case fleetingly the evening before; it had been steamed and washed, the fabric clear and petticoats of the skirt floating gently. In his other hand, a vibrant bouquet of roses. His smile never faded, walking over to his mother and pressing a kiss to each of his mother’s cheeks. Once his attention turns towards you, his eyes only brighten. 
“Hello, beautiful.” You can’t tell whether he’s playing up the affection in front of his mother, or whether it’s genuine. However, when one hand comes to rest on your cheek, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. He’s being respectful; making sure not to cross a boundary. 
“Hello, handsome.” The response falls from your lips without realizing, the grin on your husband's face only rising. Fuck. Did you mean to say that? Regardless, you had done, and by the look on his face he not only didn’t expect it but had instantly grown to love it. Charles had completely forgone the flowers in his grasp, only remembering them after your eyes had darted down towards his palms. 
“Oh-“ His mind finally catches up with the present situation, raising his hand to present you with the flowers. They’re colors are soft, delicate, as if etched by crayon. You can’t help but smile at the gesture, even if it was entirely a false pretense in front of his mother. You can’t see her face, but you know she’s smiling, seeing her son present to his wife in such a sweet manner. Now, your gaze isn’t fixed against the flowers in your grasp, but the dress from your suitcase.
“Something tells me that won’t fit you, Charles.” You tease the garment laying over his forearm, only to cause a smile to appear on his lips again. 
“I want to take you out for the afternoon. If that’s okay with you.” His voice is low now, hoping to avoid any prying of the conversation from his mother, though her attention was now turned to locating the hair dryer, still needing to complete your own treatment. “Would that be…okay?” He’s nervous. Fearful that after everything, you could now reject him and feel no remorse.
You’re not a cruel person, it has never been in your nature. Instead, you match his own smile, nodding as you take the garment from his grasp, Charles’ eyes widening in confirmation. 
“Trust you to pick out my favorite dress, too.” You mumbled. 
You loved the sound of the ocean. 
You loved everything about the sea, truly. The reflections from the moonlight caused shards to reflect over Charles’ boat; the new yacht had barely had time to stretch the waters, though it seemed to float as if it had been nurtured its entire existence. 
The afternoon of a late lunch had expanded into expensive, late-night wine on the boat as your husband had guided you into deeper waters. He knew what he was doing, after all; the waters of Monaco were a comfort to him, a lifetime had stretched out from jumping into the ocean as a child to yacht parties during the Grand Prix. 
You’d seemed entirely at home, and it made his heart warm. Charles wasn’t a stupid man; he saw how you kept yourself small, your setup at the house barely spanning over two rooms. He’d wanted nothing more than to break the walls you had put up for oh-so-long and entwine your lives together.
Then he would reprimand himself, remind himself he was the sole reason those walls existed. 
Conversation had spanned naturally into the events of the day; you thanked him for thinking of you, he’d responded with a mention of you deserving that form of treatment every single day. Your mind can’t take the anticipation; when your lips lift from the glass of wine, you can’t help but ask what his lawyer had recommended about his mistress. Your husband’s grin had fallen a little, running a hand through his dark curls. 
“It’s a difficult one.” He explains. “There’s enough there for a case, considering we haven’t had contact in a while. But…” He doesn’t need to finish his sentence; you do for him. 
“The photographs are counted as evidence.” You finish, and he can only nod. He’s created such a mess, something he could never forgive himself for doing so. A web of lies and mistreatment surrounded you both; he so wanted to break each thread and simply cradle you, be in a bubble for the rest of eternity. 
He’s expecting you to stay silent, then. Maybe that’s where the evening should have ended, with silence upon the realization that this case will not be easily solved. Instead, you place the glass of wine down on the ledge of the stairs, easing his own glass from his grasp. Charles is confused, even more so when you walk back towards him, wrapping your arms to close around his neck. 
“What are you doing?” He whispers. His hands raise hesitantly, as if touching you would break you into a million pieces. His grasp only falls to your waist when you press closer towards the man, resting your gaze on his own eyes. He’s hurt you, broken you to such an extent, and yet you can’t help but draw closer to his touch, to his eyes. 
“Being your wife.” You respond, before pressing your lips to his own. This is the first time, the first time in so long that you had been the one to initiate a kiss. Naturally, Charles’ hands wrap tighter around your waist, pulling you into his chest, deepening your touch, your kiss. This. This is the moment he wishes to bottle forever, to live in the comfort of his wife’s touch, no outside means, no other commitments being hung over his head. 
You’re not sure how long you both stand there, wrapped in one another, hands fleeting over each other, desperate to find some touch, some form of skin. It isn’t until your fingers reach to unbutton the top of his powder-blue shirt, that his own come to rest atop of yours. He knows he’s made a mistake when he sees the look you shoot him, immediately assuming the worst. 
“No, no.” He promises, both hands flying from where they had grasped yours, cradling each side of your face. It feels…warm. It feels so similar to the way Carlos had cradled your head once, when you were both on a boat, much like this. You think of those dark eyes, the whispers drawn into your ear as he had sharply thrusted into you that evening. Then, you think of the blonde appearing outside his apartment mere hours after you had been tangled in his arms. 
“I want to.” Charles’ words draw you from your endless train of thoughts. “Sweetheart, I want to more than anything, but I need you to know how much it means-“
You don’t let him finish; instead, you press your mouths back together, forcefully. There are whispers from your own lips, pleading that he take you, that you want nothing more than to feel your bodies atop of one another. 
And who is he to deny his wife? 
You’re not sure when he scoops you up into his arms, guides you inside of the boat and to the soft bed that had been freshly made mere hours ago, but he never lets your lips leave one another for less than a moment.
He’s everywhere; he’s pressing into you in the most delicious way, he’s drawing your body of the most intense sounds, and then you’re coming, harder than you ever thought was possible, it hits you in the most delicious way. 
Your fingernails pressed crescents into his skin as he continued to push into you with that perfect rhythm. Feeling your hot breath dance against the shell of his neck, the sweet whimpers of your overstimulated orgasm falling from your lips. Charles feels you clench around him, dragging you into him deeper, and it's all over.
His head immediately falls into the joint of your neck and shoulder, his pants getting heavier, thrusts rougher as he chases his own release. Teeth escape from his lips, biting down atop of the red marks he'd left earlier in a passion; the gasp you let-out, the roll of your hips against his own pushes him over the edge, a moan falling out from his own lips, hands flying to grip at your forearms pinned above him. You can feel every inch of him buried inside of you, warmth spilling into you.
Heavy hips press into yours, your thighs still pressed around his waist when he lifts his head from the warmth of your skin, pressing one final deep kiss to your lips, a profanity of words escaping from his mouth.
He kisses you again. And again. He keeps doing it whilst slowly rocking his hips, still jittering from his own orgasm. Senses come through, those eyes you had been entranced in so many times fixing to your own, drinking you in, looking so beautiful underneath his own frame.
"You still want somebody else?" The teasing is natural, almost, inflicting you to roll your eyes and playfully push his arm. God, your laugh is the most adoring sound in the world to him, it had been so long since he'd heard it, even then, it had never been due to his own actions until recently. The adorned look in his eye is soon replace with confusion when he feels you wiggle underneath him, soft blankets rubbing against your back.
"Are you going somewhere?" He questions, one hand coming up to trace against your jawline. You want to lean into his touch, it's something you'd been attracted to recently, though the mess between your legs and sweat trailing down your skin seemed to tell you something different.
"I need to clean up." You whine, pressing your body into the plush mattress. "I'm all gooey, Charles."
"I've got it." He murmurs, pressing one soft kiss to your cheek, another to your neck. You expect the weight from above to release you, but the warmth radiating from his body remains. You feel lips trace against your chest, his untamed curls tickle your stomach as he traces down a direct line.
"What are you doi-" You never get to finish you question, the fourth word cut off with a soft gasp, those lips which had pressed to yours, now pressing down against your clit, a soft praise towards your body whilst his tongue traced around the sensitive bud, drawing a slice through your wet lips, pressing deeper and deeper into your entrance.
The room is illuminated with your whines, hips bucking against his stubble as he fulfills his promise of cleaning you up.
You loved the feeling of being held.
You’d been unfathomably happy to walk into the paddock that evening, fingers interlaced with Charles’ as he guided the two of you through the fans and photographers alike, buzzing to be starting on Pole Position when his wife would be watching in awe of his achievement. 
You hadn’t been there on qualifying day; you were still trying to keep your distance where you could, to prove to your husband he couldn’t instantly win you back overnight. It had only been when he’d come into the en-suite of your room the evening before, hands wrapped around your waist as he pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, pleading you came to watch him race the following night.
“I’ll win.” He promises, voice quiet as he rests his chin on your shoulder. “I’ll win it for you.” 
His sweet words had not only lured you to the race track the following day but had also drawn you to sleep in his bed that evening, curled up into his toned chest as he murmured words of appreciation in French; only a few you were able to pick up and understand the meaning of as you drifted into a comfortable sleep, arms cradling your body underneath the bed sheets.
There was a collective, loving aura that evening when the two of you had stepped into his garage, the team in awe of seeing that their Prince of Monaco and his beloved Princess had been reunited, here to support one another. However, one figure remained quiet, eyes transfixed on your every movement. He felt his knuckles turn white when Charles had changed into his race suit, placing his cap atop of your own head and had lovingly pressed two kisses to either of your cheeks.
Carlos Sainz was a jealous man; he’d been infuriated when his blonde fling had appeared on his doorstep, instantly realizing the kind of man he must have been made out to be when you’d seen her appear on your departure. He’d hoped and prayed you hadn’t seen her, but from the radio silence he received over messages and calls, to the way you had purposely avoided speaking to him when arriving in the paddock, he could tell you were not that naive.
Emotions had played a heavy part on both of the Ferrari Pilots during the start of the race. One, determined to keep his promise and win whilst his wife was present. The other was so clouded with sadness and rage that all he wanted to do was push his counterpart off the track. The lights snapped off, 20 engines revving in unison as the cars blitzed down the first straight. 
It doesn’t take long for emotion to overcome; Charles’ P6 soon creeps towards a P3, whilst Carlos begins to drop. A violent turn into Oscar Piastri not only takes the young rookie out of the race, but the Ferrari driver, too. Nobody misses the swears as he switches the engine off, nor the scowl on his face as he removes the steering wheel, ready to be escorted back to the garage. 
When the blur of red comes through the paddock, you can’t help but feel guilty, telling yourself that if you had spoken to him, he would have been able to keep a cool head. Silently, you slip the headphones from your temple, murmuring about going to the bathroom before taking a direct beeline towards Carlos’ room, catching the door just before it’s due to slam closed. 
He was seething. Pure rage flicked across his eyes; the warm smile reserved for you replaced with a harsh scowl. This may have been a mistake. 
“What do you want?” His words are venom, spit towards you. He cannot stand to see you right now.
“I just-“You pause, clearing your throat. “I wanted to check if you were okay.” It’s a pathetic answer, really. One that didn’t sit right in your mouth, even after you had spoken. 
“I’m alright?” He scoffs, shaking his head. “You ignore my calls, go away and fuck that pathetic man and then come back to me?” He’s pissed, undoubtedly so. “You whore. I understand it all now.” He shakes his head, missing the fire which had begun to burn in your own stomach. 
“You have no right!” You’d shrieked so loudly you’d startled yourself; one finger was still pointed into his infuriated face, your finger mere millimeters from the bridge of his nose. Hot air engulfed both of your bodies, the only sound present was the deep and heavy breathing flaring from your nostrils. 
Without a thought, Carlos had slapped your finger away from his face, lunging forward dramatically to seize your face into his rough palms. His lips are on yours, roughly seeking the wet trace of your tongue. You can’t fight him; not when his lips feel so flawless against your own. A rough palm encases the back of your neck, the other wrapping around your waist as he holds your frame tighter against his own. 
Your breath barely had a moment to catch when he forcefully pulled his lips from you, emitting a white from your breath. That innocent sound is soon replaced by a sharp gasp, his fingers tightening against your scalp, pulling on your locks. 
“Don’t fucking whine.” He spits, ghosting his lips over your own, never letting them touch yours. Warm breath tickles the shell of your ear when his grip pulls tighter onto your hair, tiling your ear to meet his mouth. “I’m sick of your whining, about your horrible excuse for a husband. I will treat you how you should be treated.”
There’s no time to react as his pink tongue pokes from his lips, a stripe tracing from the corner of your ear, across the sweetest spot of your neck. You’re reveling in the wetness, the sinful way his words litter through the air before teeth sink into your skin. He doesn’t bother to cover your mouth, mute the sweet sounds falling from your lips. There’s no decency anymore, Carlos doesn’t care who sees the marks he engraves into your skin. The ring on your left hand means nothing more than a reminder that he could be better. 
“Carlos-“ You struggle to connect the two syllables together, hands gripping through his hair, pulling at the brown locks in your fingers. “Fuck-“ 
“What did I just say?” He grunts from the valley of your neck, one hand sliding from your waist and flying out, smacking on your clothed butt. The shock simply causes you to gasp out loud, pushing your own throbbing crotch into his hard one. A smirk forms against your neck, clear as day when the man pulls himself from your neck. His lips are wet, saliva from his own mouth tracing around your lips. 
One hand finds your face again, grasping at your chin tilting your head backwards to hover below his own. A single finger taps at your lips, signaling for you to open wide for him. He’s sinful as he lets his spit fall across your lips, eyebrows raised as he wraps a hand around your throat, clearly overpowering your stance in this moment.
“Swallow.” He commands, hand resting on your cheek firmly. The tone of his voice sends a shock of energy down your chest and between your legs, cunt throbbing at his words. Of course, you comply, swallowing the remanence he had given you. “Good girl.” 
The sweet nicknames in this moment have evaporated; Carlos is nothing short of animalistic, his presence all too understanding as one hand takes its place around your neck, the other grabbing firmly onto your wrist as he guides you backwards, softly falling onto the sofa of his driver’s room. The pitying looks the man gives you sends a thousand messages through your brain. 
“No, no. Dirty little girls don’t get to sit on my sofa.” He teases, both hands clasping your waist, sliding you off the plush furnishings and resting on the cold floor, kneeling for the Spaniard. “You need to be on your knees, you need to be taught how to behave.” 
Eyes widen as his tanned fingers pull at the knotted arms of the fireproofs resting on his waist. Even through his underclothes, the shape of his hard length is clearly visible, even more so as he removes his underlayers and briefs, letting himself spring freely, one hand rubbing his shaft a few times, the other knotting in the back of your hair. 
He loves this; cock in his hand as he taps the tip against each of your cheeks, trailing himself against the parting of your lips, having to hide the shiver from his own body when the wetness of your mouth. His eyes are sparkling when he uses his firm cock to press through your mouth, relishing in the warmth of your lips wrapping around his length. 
“That’s it, be a good girl. Take it.” He coos as you struggle to take more of his length, attempting to give small, tentative licks to his cock whilst he slides between your lips. It sends him feral, wild. He thinks of nothing else as both hands grip tightly in your hair, shoving your face into his crotch, your gags music to his ears as he continues to take control of the situation.
When your eyes adjust, look up from his groin, he almost feels sorry for you. They’re wide, glassy, snuffles falling from your lips as he continues his forceful attack. One hand slowly removes itself from the strain on your locks, tracing over your cheek, thumb rubbing underneath your eye, removing the salty tears as your breath remains heavy through your nose. 
“Oh, poor baby.” He teases, pace never relenting. “This is what you need, someone to put you in your place, remind you what you deserve for teasing me, making me jealous.” He can’t help but chuckle at the pathetic sound coming from your lips. He can feel his stomach tightening, the warmth drawing an imminent release from his cock. This isn’t how he wants to finish, he can’t yet. 
Your mouth feels empty when he pulls out, giving you no warning, the gasps falling from your lips at the sudden gain of air. He doesn’t give you time to respond, a heavy hand pushing your front to the floor, lifting your hips, ass straight back in the air. No warning, the skirt of your dress is lifted, the wetness of your cunt seeping through your panties. The anticipation kills you, until a warm finger slides into your folds with no warning. Your body can’t help but react, clenching around the warmness without even realizing. You also don’t realize the sounds you’re making, until the finger removes itself, a palm harshly smacking on your behind. 
“What did I say about noises?” He grunts, leaning around to push the wet finger into your own mouth. “Do you like it? Taste what I do to you?” Hurriedly, he presses his finger in and out of your lips a few times before returning it to your wet hole, wiggling in the air. This time there’s two; stretching you out, your palms trying to find anything to grip, to hold on to as he carelessly thrusted, tickling a sweet, sweet spot deep in your stomach. 
“I- Carlos I can’t-“ You whine through raspy breaths. He can feel you clenching, swelling around his fingers, and is rewarded when he hastily pulls them out of you, a long moan and a squirt of arousal pushing from your cunt. A sheer shock of arousal floods between his own legs, rubbing his fingers against your wet folds, letting your wetness trail onto the tips of his hand.
“Oh, your husband can’t make you do that, can he?” He’s proud; proud he’s able to draw such a reaction from your body. “Come on, baby, up we get.” His arms are suddenly firm, present around your waist as he pulls you to stand on two shaky legs, still reveling in the feeling he had granted you moments ago. 
Hands retract from your waist and come to hold your face, pressing kisses to your scarlet lips as he guides you from a standing position towards his couch, finally allowing himself to sink into the cushions. You want nothing more than to join him, feel his warmth and aura around your own body, but by the finger he’s raised as he situates himself into the sofa, you can tell you’ll have to wait. 
The moment he sits down, a tanned hand comes to his crotch to rub his length a few times, your eyes widening as you plead for it; mind clouded by lust, all you want is for something warm to fill you up, make you feel as good as he had done so many times before. Carlos’ finger beckons for you to join him, and you know what he’s insinuating. 
Your movements are commanded by the Spaniard; immediately, there are two firm hands on your body, pulling you into his touch and sinking you down onto his cock. You don’t miss the way his lips quirk into a grin, oh-so-happy to see your reaction to the pleasure he had granted you. It’s no match for when he starts moving, bouncing you up and down on his lap, fallen gasps from your lips as your faces draw closer and closer.
You were sinking into one another’s skin; he wanted nothing more than to entwine your bodies for eternity. One hand was firm around your waist, guiding your movement with the strength only he could. The other guided a gentle trace across your face, pulling you closer, closer to his own face as his thrusts got faster, erratic. 
“You’re mine.” He grunts, never once breaking eye contact as his hips grew tighter, his cock making your cunt squeeze in a way you didn’t know was physically possible. “You’ve always been mine, tell me you’re mine.”
His eyes go soft, thrusts pausing for a second as he notes the tears pooling in your eyes from the sheer euphoria running through your body. A whine falls from your lips as you feel his strong hand tug at your neck, pressing your foreheads towards one another, hips slowing for just a moment, letting your breath catch up to your aching body. 
“I’m yours.” You’d whisper, mind clouded. You were his. There could be a thousand cars, an ocean or a wedding band between the two of you and you would still always find your way back to Carlos. Whatever that relationship would form, you would always be a part of him. 
The murmured confirmation was enough to send a shot of energy through his spine, his thrusting becoming deeper, passionate. It barely takes five thrusts before he’s groaning, throwing his head back and letting out a low moan as he spills himself into you. The warmth is enough to send your cunt into flutters, clenching so tightly as your body falls into his chest, whining as you feel a gush of wetness drip onto his crotch. 
Undoubtedly, Carlos Sainz is now a part of you. Time seems to flicker between seconds and minutes, at some point you’ve shifted your weight, turning around to fix your eyes onto the television screen of his room, eyes wide as you watch your husband continue to battle out on the track. It felt almost sinful; watching Charles battle for his podium whilst his teammate stayed buried inside of you. 
His touch goes soft; one hand remains tight around your waist, though your back is warmed by the way you’re pulled back into his skin. Feather-Light kisses dance across your shoulder, he’s never been this soft, cradling you as if the world would be held together by your content. If the universe was to implode, he would be happy with the fact you were pressed into him in that very moment. 
The laps of the race begin to dwindle; a promising second-place is looking pretty much secured for Charles. You’re certain that your silver trophy will be sitting proudly in the hotel room later that evening, until Max Verstappen suddenly begins to slow down, commentators beginning to roar as an unexpected engine issue splutters into the RB19. 
“Holy shit.” Carlos murmurs, sitting up from his relaxed position, both arms now tightly around your waist as he shifts the balance of your bodies. “What happened to Max?” His voice becomes a murmur, your attention drifts, focused on the cars beginning to pick up their speed against the current world champion. 
Goosebumps litter your skin, you immediately pull away from the warmth of Carlos, eyes wide as you see the scarlet red car glide into view. He’s going to overtake Max. Not only that, but your husband is about to win the entire race. 
An audible groan comes from both of you when you slip yourself off his length, searching around for the panties which had been discarded oh-so-long ago; the man rests a hand on your shoulder, one hand tracing across your jawline as the other reaches down, gently smoothing the skirt of your long dress. 
“We’ll find them later. We need to go and congratulate your husband, after all.” You can’t miss the cockiness in his voice, still content with the fact his cum is buried deep inside your pussy, panties are left in his driver’s room as a sheer prize for being able to make you feel euphoric. A tinted blush decorates your cheeks as he slips into his old jeans and a Ferrari polo shirt, one hand resting on the small of your back as he guides you out of his driver’s room, never once bothering to fix his hair when you had been the one to grab onto it so tightly.
People wouldn’t think that of him, after all. 
You love to be loved. 
Your eyes are brimming with tears as you reach Parc Fermé, Carlos finally catching up with you, standing right behind you at the barrier, eyes transfixed onto his teammate, standing atop of his livery, cheering towards the endless roars of the crowd, passing a congratulatory message towards his fellow drivers, Lewis patting his back, Lando cheering on his behalf.
He’s already removed his helmet when he sprints towards his team; the losses don’t matter, not when he can celebrate the win he had been craving for so, so long. There are praises passed, pats on the back as he works his way down the winding line of his team, red in their clothes and their cheeks, it means the world to everybody. 
And then, Charles is facing you, his wife. He’s so transfixed upon your gaze, the sheer elation you have for his victory that he doesn’t stop to think when he takes two of his hands on either side of your face, cradling your cheeks as he presses his lips to yours, grinning into such a sweet kiss that you can’t help but kiss him back. 
“I told you.” He whispers when he pulls away from you, resting a gentle hand on your cheek for just a moment. His eyes finally turned to where his teammate was standing. Both of them have to forge a smile as they reach out to clasp hands, a firm grip in celebration of scoring points for their team. 
You don’t see him again, not until he’s left the cool-down room and is bounding towards the podium. Carlos, having not been called to his post-race interview yet, still stood behind you, though one hand had snaked its way around your waist, as if it had to be there. Nobody notices, of course. The team is too focused upon their driver lifting his golden trophy, in awe of the achievement they had built for seemingly the entire season.
Charles doesn’t miss it, of course. Maybe that’s why his gaze is so fixed on you when he releases a splash of champagne, purposely aiming his bottle towards the man behind you, his heart only crushing further when he sees the Spaniard pull your frame behind his own in protection. 
And then, it’s all over. Both Carlos and Charles are rushed away to complete their post-race interviews. You’re left alone, simply taking a slow walk towards the Ferrari Hospitality. Even as you pace through the crowds, you can’t help but feel…sick. Dizzy. Out-of-body. 
You cared for your husband greatly, and somewhere during it all, you believed his apology was genuine, that he truly wanted to fix the previous mistakes of the year. But how long would his tether last until his mistress came trailing back, regardless of a court ruling?
And Carlos. The sweet man who had proved to you time and time again, you were worth more than a simple name on a piece of paper. He’d been your soul, you truly were set to drop an entire marriage to live in his arms until his blonde counterpart came along, a knife to the chest after one of the most intimate nights you could fathom. 
Your breathing gets faster, the world begins to turn on an axis. From somewhere, you hear a voice asking if you’re okay, if you need help getting back to the hospitality. And then, the world goes black, your body slumps to the floor of the paddock, with only one sentence drifting through your unconscious mind.
Who do you love? 
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atherix0 · 2 years ago
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HII yes i'm here to talk about chapter three of midnight ambush!! :D murderous intent mumbo<3 protective mumbo<3 he's everything to me<3 my man was immediately ready to get up and go kill the vampire who dared to hurt scar lmaoo. it's so cute that his urge to protect grian and scar is stronger than his rage and will for revenge, he's so sweet even when he's all (murder and violence scary vampire instincts). AND HE THINKS OF THEM AS HIS COVEN. I'M NEVER GONNA GET OVER THIS. and of course grian has to try really hard to covince scar that yes, mumbo got all protective because scar got hurt. oblivious little guy . mumbo: i would literally kill for scar scar: i don't think mumbo sees me as a part of his coven tbh and grian has to deal with it as always . plus the mental image of grian trying to stop both mumbo, who's five seconds away from going after a supercharged vampire lord because she hurt scar, and scar, who is weak from injuries and trying to stand up and falling over..... world's most disastrous throuple<3 none of them are functional, they match<3 also . scar getting flustered when grian called him out on his crush on mumbo :3 yeah sure, you're not obsessed at all scar. not even a little. totally. hehe "(Scar won’t be here in twenty years.)" THAT'S EVIL . DO YOU WANT ME DEAD. ahh thinking about how hard it must be for all of them to deal with. like the knowledge that the person you love is gonna die and there's nothing you can do about it:( i'm looking at the angst with a happy ending in the description really intensely right now of course they got the hair routine wrong lmaoo . but they tried! maybe scar can teach them how to do it properly one day :3 he's their elf now after all. not officially yet but still . grian and mumbo took one look at scar and decided that they need to care for him forever now bc he will never do it properly himself and someone has to. i love when they all take care of each other btw, they're so sweet thay make me<3333 ohh btw more random thoughts, neptune by sleeping at last is such a midnight!scar song . the lyrics are soo scar vibes, i've thought about him when i was listening to it today, the brainrot is really strong
Hiii I have gotten home now and can answer without getting lost <3
Yessss I love him so much <3 It would have been ON SIGHT <3 Yes he's such a good Lord boyfriend/future boyfriend, need to protect his bird and his Elf <3 And it's so important to me that Mumbo even tho he has Vampire Rage moments will always prioritize Grian and Scar's safety so <3 YESSSS it's ALSO rly important to me that Mumbo forms his own Coven in direct contrast with the Covens they're fighting <3 hhhhjgjdf Scar has so much baggage/trauma it was so hard for him to accept his son loves him I s2g he <3 He thinks he's unlovable </3
HAHA it's accurate and Grian is just on the side like "what do you MEAN-"
They're dysfunctional in the best ways possible <3 Grian digging his heels in and having absolutely no chance of stopping an angry Vampire and Scar leaping up just to immediately crash to the floor because he's lost so much blood <3 They're all disasters and I love them so much-
Scar will literally break the law for Mumbo, and Mumbo (and Grian) only, and then turn around and claim he does not love the man smh he deserves to be called out <3
MWAHAHAHAHA I cackled when I wrote that <3 As time goes on it'll only get harder especially when it all starts catching up with him and Grian realizes something coughcoughcxough um anyway- YES don't worry it's angst with a happy ending <3 Specifically happy, not bittersweet <3 Don't worry <3 It may be open-ended but there'll be a few avenues hjfsdlkds <3
They tried and Scar appreciated the effort <3 👀👀👀 Scar teaching them how he takes care of his hair <3 hhhhgh frikkin- I wanna write the hairbrushing scene so badly because that alone is so big for Scar jkfsjkdfkjds I also look forward to Grian and Mumbo standing there staring down some idiot daring to flirt with Scar in front of them because they're both possessive mofos lmao Taking care of each other because they don't take care of themselves <3 they all care so much more about each other and have to learn how to love themselves too hjglkfsdgjkdfs they're helping each other heal and that's so hhhhh <3 I love relationships that lift each other up <3
I would like you to know that I have been listening to this song on REPEAT now, it is SUCH a Midnight!Scar song holy cows, I really need to continue writing and not analyzing a song for why it fits Midnight!Scar to a T hhh-
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atlabeth · 4 years ago
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fever - sokka x reader
this has been sitting in my drafts half finished for 3 weeks so i thot it was prime time i actually finished it
this is kinda based off the song w dua lipa and angele so you can listen to that if you want
summary: sokka's convinced there's a mystery illness keeping you from focusing, but somehow he's completely oblivious that the only 'sick' you are is lovesick, and he's the reason you can't focus.
a/n: i have never written a sickfic. but this is like. a fake sick fic. its an idiots in love fic. i mean this is coming from mr "is he taller than me? is he better looking?" himself so. it makes sense. as usual, this is not proofread bc im a lazy mf
also im sorry for being vague with the calc but i was NOT about to do math during summer who do you think i am? ??
wc: 1.7k
warning(s): mentions of being sick and 🤢calculus 🤮 but otherwise tooth rotting fluff
-
How could the smartest man you knew be so, so incredibly stupid?
You thought that you were being obvious, so obviously that you were sure he knew. It was embarrassing how obvious you were.
You had met Sokka in your calculus class at the start of the new semester after you ended up sitting next to each other, and it wasn’t a stretch to say that you were immediately smitten. With eyes like the ocean and a face that had to have been crafted by the gods, you were almost too distracted to respond when he asked you for a pencil. But when he winked at you after giving his thanks, it only solidified what you had already suspected: you had known this man for all of five minutes, and you already had a crush on him.
Little did you know, it was going to turn into the most infuriating crush you had ever experienced.
You and Sokka became fast friends even though calculus was the only class you had together. Unfortunately, it was also something that you completely sucked at. Bad news, it was required for your major. Good news, Sokka was some sort of genius and offered to tutor you — Wednesdays in the library turned into a weekly occasion, and served as an opening for your calculus skills, your feelings for Sokka, and your exasperation to all grow stronger.
You normally weren’t someone to beat around the bush. If you started to like someone, you told them and dealt with whatever happened after, but something about Sokka just kept you from spilling your feelings outright. You knew that if he didn’t feel the same way, your relationship likely wouldn’t change, but there was still that tiny voice that said it’s better to stay like this in case things do go wrong — and this was the first time you listened to that voice. You simply valued your friendship too much.
But that didn’t mean you were going to be completely quiet about it — you hoped that if you did enough, he would be able to realize you liked him and do the whole process for you. A bit of a dim hope, but crushes make people do stupid things.
Things like bringing an extra coffee to every session, laughing at all his jokes (even the bad ones), sitting a little closer to him than usual, not dropping out of this wretched class so you could spend time together (it might’ve been required, but you still counted it). He didn’t make a point to object to anything, so you knew you weren’t making him uncomfortable — but you had concluded after nearly a whole semester of working and studying together that he was the most oblivious person in all of Ba Sing Se. He could teach you all kinds of formulas, but had no idea that you liked him. Grand.
Today was arguably the most important session out of any of them, seeing as your next class was the final, so it was only fitting that Sokka unknowingly made himself more interesting than any material you could’ve been working with. His arms were going to be the death of both you and your calc grade. You swore that the heat rushing to your cheeks was actually emanating off of you.
“Hey, Y/N!” Sokka grinned as he saw you and raised a hand in greeting, a sentiment you would’ve returned had it not been for the coffee cups in your hands. You settled for mirroring his grin and settled down in the seat across from him. You slid his coffee cup over, set your own down, then shrugged your bag off all before taking a seat.
“You ready to study ‘till your eyes bleed?” he asked, prompting a nervous laugh from you.
“You jest, but my eyes might actually start bleeding depending on how long we go,” you sighed. “There’s a reason I got an extra shot of espresso today.”
“Come on — by now you should know that you have nothing to worry about! I am the best teacher there is, and you got me all to yourself.”
Your eyes widened momentarily and you coughed, purposefully averting your gaze to give yourself some time to recover. Okay, he was going to make it really hard to focus today. “Let’s just get into it.”
He nodded and flipped open his notebook, beginning to talk as he rifled through his bag for a few extra things. “Okay, we’re just gonna start with going over the basics, then we’ll work our way up. There’s a couple practice problems on that page, so you can go ahead and answer those as a warmup.
You slid the notebook over in front of you and after approximately five seconds of looking at the first problem, found yourself studying Sokka rather than the material. Who could blame you? In the battle of cute tutor boy versus calculus, he was going to win every time.
He turned around and you immediately averted your eyes once again, trying to appear extremely involved, but you found that your mind was empty on anything to do with math. “Hey, uh— how do you do this first one? I’m totally blanking here.”
“We use limits in everything — this is actually something you’re really good at!” He studied you intensely and frowned. “Are you okay? Like, you’re not sick or anything, are you? You seem kinda out of it.”
You choked out a laugh and shook your head. “No, no — I’m fine. I guess I’m just a little tired.” As if to demonstrate your lie, you took a sip from your coffee and cringed internally. Love had turned you into an idiot.
He seemed to buy it as he nodded and picked up the pencil, scribbling a couple of notes as he explained the first problem to you. “Does that make sense?” You nodded and he handed the pencil back to you. “Okay — the other ones follow the same kind of process. It should be easy enough.”
You managed to get a little further in the second problem, but your lovestruck mind would not stop focusing back on Sokka every time you tried to do, well, anything. Curse him and his perfect arms, and eyes, and hairstyle, and everything.
You shook your head and set the pencil down once more, letting loose a frustrated sigh. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me.” Yes, you did. “I just can’t focus at all.” Because of you. You picked up your cup once more and took a sip, hoping it would do something to get you back into the math state of mind.
Sokka frowned once more as he put the back of his hand against your forehead. “God, you’re hot.” You nearly choked on your coffee as your eyes practically bulged out of their sockets — he had to know what he was doing by now — how could he not? “Like, you’re completely burning up. Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m fine, I swear— I just…” you set your cup down on the table and heaved a sigh that was a touch more exasperated than necessary. “Are you telling me you seriously haven’t noticed? Like, not a single thing this whole year?”
“I’ve noticed a lot of things this year,” he chuckled. “It’s kind of our whole job, so you’re gonna have to be a lot more specific.”
You finally couldn’t hold it in anymore. “Sokka, I’m not— I’m not sick! Haven’t you noticed that I’m only ever flustered, or running into things, or forgetting info, or— or just a complete idiot when I’m around you? I like you, like, a lot, and I have for an embarrassingly long time! The reason I can’t focus is because I am hopelessly attracted to you in every single way.”
His brows creased for a moment and you clamped your mouth shut, worried that you had just ruined everything. It was only after a pause that felt like a century that he finally responded, the hint of a smirk on his lips.
“Well, why didn’t you just say something?”
You stared at him, eyes wide and lips slightly parted in pure surprise before the annoyance set in. You set your jaw as your brows furrowed and you hit him lightly on the side of his arm with the back of your palm. “You can’t be serious! You— you’ve gotta be messing with me by now. I really can’t believe that you can be that smart but this oblivious!”
He finally let the grin play across his lips in full force and he shrugged nonchalantly. “I mean, I don’t know how you don’t expect me to mess with you when you scrunch up your face all cute like that every time you get mad. Besides, I started liking you after that fifth class; I offered to help you out so I could spend more time with you! I didn’t realize you felt the same way. I kinda just enjoyed the free coffee and getting to look at you all the time.”
“I can’t believe you!” you cried as you hit his other arm. “You’re telling me that I had to deal with this- this mental turmoil about whether you liked me back, while you were just enjoying the free eye candy and coffee the whole time?”
“You have nothing to worry about! I enjoyed the company far more than the coffee,” he joked, a certain twinkle in his eye. “But, you are probably out a couple twenties after all of that. So, what do you say about this Saturday, the cafe by the shoe store? My treat.”
“Damn right it’s your treat,” you shot back, though you couldn’t stop the smile forming on your face. “You owe me a lot — you have to make up for those coffees and all the emotional distress you caused.”
“Oh, I think I’ll have plenty of time to make up for lost time. After all, we do have a lot of coffee dates to get through.” And when he winked at you just like that first day, you remembered just how impossible it was to be angry at Sokka. “But first, we kinda have to get through this study date. The final’s still happening tomorrow.”
You responded with a raised brow. “This is a study date?”
Sokka shrugged and grinned. “They’ve all been study dates. You just didn’t know it.”
-
idiots in love idiots in love idiots In LOVe
perm tag list: @dv0412 @siriuslyslyslytherin @maruchan77
atla: @marianne1806
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jiminrings · 4 years ago
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LINCHBOX LOVERS FIRST KISS IM BEGGING
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cold senior!y/n x stem major koo masterlist :D
jungkook’s never really had his first kiss and he might faint in nervousness
there’s something really important that jungkook’s nEVER said to you
he kinda thinks it’s a life or death scenario <3
the two of you are together now after all!! you know things about each other, that’s just how it is
you know that his oddly specific fear is having a spider crawl on him while he’s asleep and that he can’t read sheet music or a single note for the life of him!!! lol that’s why he’s in stem
jungkook knows that you like cracking your knuckles on your hand using the same hand, and that you’re actually SCARED if you even try to crack them with your opposite hand
one time jin caught you off-guard and cracked your knuckles all at the same time and you hate that too so you ended up crying to yoongi
the two of you will eventually know almost everything about each other in due time!!
but jungkook really really wants you to know right now
right now IS due time
yoongi’s out to pick up jin because he’s in another state that’s seven hours away!! it’s wholesome friendship but more or less begging with the promise of kim “mr. student affairs” seokjin
“i will coerce your physics teacher bc i’m buddies with him to give you an A+ this semester if you pick me up rn :-)”
.... hehe.......... along those lines.,.....,..,..
you tagged out when yoongi asked you to come with him because you wanted to spend some time with jungkook, and then yoongs flat-out pretended not to hear what you just said and then left
once again, tae does nOT know if he’s helping but!!! he tagged along with yoongi :D
atleast everyone now knows that yoongi’s safe because he definitely will not be sleepy with all of tae’s chattering
this is the first time you’ve invited jungkook over with absolutely no one else in the dorm
no seokjin who’s hovering and keeps teasing for the two of you to sit two rulers apart
no yoongi who insists on keeping all the lights turned on so there would be no funny business
in fact, there’s no funny business that’s happening
and that’s what jungkook wants to talk about!! that’s where he’s getting at!!
he knows you’re just respecting his space and his decisions!! that’s how considerate you are
even if jungkook hasn’t explicitly said anything about his experiences and lack thereof, jimin once told him that everything about him screams ahhckkk vIRGINNNNN!!!!!! so that’s perfectly embedded into his mind
after some thinking though, kook finally had the handle on himself to know that he’s ready — one first time at a time :-)
it’s the whole reason why jungkook didn’t think twice of coming over when you asked him to
and he’s using this time now to tell you what he hadn’t before
right now when the two of you are watching a movie and his head’s resting on the crook of your shoulder with your hand on his knee, to tell you that —
“i haven’t had my first kiss.”
jungkook blurts out and it’s not only him that’s a little taken-aback with the suddenness, feeling your head tilt to come look at him
“really?” your nose scrunches but there’s no judgement to your eyes to which jungkook is extremely thankful for, being extra observant of your reaction
he nods almost eagerly now that the weight’s gone from his chest, making you smile slightly
“that’s okay.”
you only hum in reply and guide jungkook’s head back to your shoulder, resuming on watching the movie with no worries in mind
there’s no worries but there are definitely a LOT of thoughts in ur mind,,,,
you’ve kinda expected it from the start but there’s nothing wrong about it!!!
the other entire reason you knew that jungkook’s never done anything was because jimin kept squawking ahckkckk VIRGINNNNNN!!!!
you can’t forget that time when jimin also needed to interview an athlete for his paper and he needed you specifically
the two of you were talking and jungkook’s approaching you with a skip in his step and your lunchbox and jimin just wanted to fuck with him a lil so he squawked it out loud
...... jungkook really insisted that it wasn’t true but he kNEW no one was buying it so that’s when he started plotting his revenge on jimin ://
just when he’s gonna get a little too deep into his thoughts on why you’re so nonchalant, you’re the one who catches him off-guard this time
“do you want to kiss me?”
he goes rigid and sits upright completely, head eagerly nodding
“o-of course.”
:-)
“oh. okay.”
..... what
........ he’s lost
jungkook’s a little confused because that’s it??? no additional remark?????
you’re just sitting on the couch like you have been for the past hour and that’s it!!! you’re back to watching your movie AS IF you haven’t asked him if he wants to kiss you!!!
what now
your eyes are just glued on the screen and he’s starting to think that love & other drugs is more interesting than him
jungkook visibly scowls and you can see him from your peripheral vision, resisting the urge to chuckle at his displeased face
“this is the part where you’re supposed to kiss me.”
his deadpanning is what breaks you, making your eyes tear away from the screen that’s rapidly losing your attention at this point
jungkook smiles meekly at your giggle, seeing you tilt your head to playfully taunt him
“oh so i’m kissing you? you’re not kissing me?”
hee-hee
“that’s my plan,” he says surely, putting his hand on top of yours before scooching much closer to you than he did before
“mhmm. sure.”
jungkook smiles in victory when you agree, drumming his fingers on your knee in anticipation
..... nothing’s happening
........ THERE YOU ARE AGAIN
your eyes are back on the tv but it’s obvious that you aren’t focused on the movie that’s playing, a playful glint more than evident
jungkook’s not annoyed but he’s definitely on his toes, jostling you by your arms to get your attention
“just kiss me! are you gonna make me beg at this point??” he frowns in waiting, quickly getting antsy with all your harmless teasing
“can you beg, jungkook?”
you ask dryly with the same playful air in your tone, the sudden return of the question to his court making him double-take
his eyes have considerably widened with what you just playfully and harmlessly asked him, cheeks pink with the teasing
“you’re so impatient. i was gonna kiss you anyway, y’know?”
jungkook shies away from your trained gaze on him but meets it intensely when he feels a weight on his lap
you’ve transferred seats from the couch to his lap, your bum placed on his thighs instead of his crotch so you would be able to give him some leeway with all of this being his first
if jungkook was flustered before then he’s probably burning now, eyes only focused on you that’s meant for him
he’s not quite sure what to do with his hands so he follows his split-second decision of putting them on your thighs since the rest of your legs are placed behind his back, seeing to it that he was already slouching on the couch in the first place
you smile in appreciation when he does, his once-awkward hands in your thighs now becoming natural with the reassurance
jungkook looks so gentle
he’s so delicate even when you’re all clothed in pajamas and you’re the one who’s sitting on his lap, so careful to the point that he doesn’t want to move to preserve the moment
you tangle your hand on his hair to card through it more smoothly, making him tense as he takes it as signal
“i-i close my eyes, right?”
he asks nervously to which you nod to understandingly, carding through his hair more to get him to relax a little bit
wait actually the mental image of jungkook being O_O when you kiss him almost makes you cackle out loud which is why you hide your face on his neck
oblivious to you trying to contain your laughter, jungkook’s gotten even mORE tense because your face is buried on his neck
-_-
^ that instead of of o_O !!! yeah much better
IT’S OKAY IT’S OKAY YOU’RE NOT LAUGHING NOW!!!
jungkook’s waiting for you to make the first move and he looks both flushed and pale at the same time, feeling apologetic for having made him that way
“let me kiss you first. you’ll have a feel for it once i do, okay?” you speak as soothingly as possible, making him nod in understanding so you’d know
“relax, baby. you just complement me,” your hands rub up and down his arms that are exposed since he’s wearing a shirt instead of a hoodie this time, trying to get him loose
“y-you’re really perfect and i love you.”
jungkook trips over his words but he means them nonetheless, mouth contorting both in confusion and amusement when you grin at him
god, jungkook’s so endearing :(((
“i meant complement the way i kiss and not compliment me, kook,” you chuckle and he sheepishly reddens at his misunderstanding, his mind being taken away from it when you kiss his cheek. “but that’s okay. i love you too.”
“it’s just me. relax.”
you scratch that special spot behind his ear that gets him to calm down and all pliable, having noticed it first when you hugged him for the first time and buried your head on his neck, rendering him mush in your arms right away
jungkook’s relaxed enough that he doesn’t feel like fainting when your face is this close to his, going a little cross-eyed with how lovestruck he is for you
and then you lean in.
jungkook almost pANICS but the way you hold him gets him to be soft instantly, the unnecessary worry in his mind melting away immediately
he practically croons in satisfaction when the taste of you hits his tongue and engulfs him fully, eyelids closing in pure ease with the delight he feels
you taste so sweet and perfect that jungkook finds himself chasing after your kiss, unconscious to the fact he’s really kissing you now
his head angles when you tilt yours and the taste of your lips hits him harder this time that he grunts before he moans inaudibly, melting even deeper when you tug his hair softly
jungkook’s looking for more that he scowlS (!!) when you pull away with an amused look on your face,
“you’re supposed to breathe, jungkook.”
“you’re kissing me and i don’t know how to breathe!!!! i literally don’t know if i can!!!”
he’s only noticing nOW that he wasn’t breathing before because of the way his chest rises and falls heavily, cheeks all hot and his neck flushing
“don’t they teach breathing and shit in stem?” you ask playfully that earns you a soft yet amused glare, a pout being sent your way. “try breathing, baby.”
you lean once more and this time it’s easier, taking it slow to get jungkook used to kissing AND breathing simultaneously
he’s easily overwhelmed with the taste of your lips and not to mention the fact that you’re seated on his lap!!!!!
the rhythmic caresses of your thumb on his cheek guides him to breathe, the fact that jungkook’s a quick learner now dawning on you
“good job, baby.”
jungkook’s grinning at the praise you give him, feeling as if those words aren’t the last that you’re gonna tell him
“now try kissing me.”
...
..... oh god there it is
jungkook looks nervous and calculating even, the overwhelment present in his gaze and he’s looking at your neck instead of your face
you’re just about to tell him it’s okay and climb off his lap when jungkook takes you off-guard and tugs you down, lips meeting yours wholly in eagerness that you lowly moan before you even know it
you’re tugging softly on his hair and it spurs him on to try and taste you even deeper, pulling on the front of your shirt to get you closer
this time, you feel like yOU’RE not breathing rip
“your lips are getting puffy.”
you point out to jungkook who has some sweat sticking to his forehead even if your dorm’s fully airconditioned
a frown goes in place of the same red and puffy lips that you’ve just pointed out, the sheer eagerness of jungkook shooting straight both to your ego and your heart
“they’re not puffy enough.”
jungkook looks blissfully fucked out and you’ve only kissed him now.
tonight’s only for his first time kissing and jungkook deems it insufficient that he’s only had the heart to kiss you tonight, soft and slow kisses on your jaw that render you surprised, kissing you by the line until you look at him fully
“kiss me more.”
.
.
.
.
it’s their first miscellaneous drabble!! as always, lmk what you think :D what do you want to see from the lunchbox lovers next? send them here <3
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unknownwriting · 4 years ago
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summary- request: prom hc
character s- Portgas D. Ace, Sabo, Monkey D. Luffy, Trafalgar Water D. Law
warnings- underage drinking, besides that none :)
a/n- so like I’m still a junior so I have no idea what proms like but I mean I seen a very movies sooo...I hope you still enjoy 💕
Unedited
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Portgas D. Ace
Definitely the flustered type but he’s so unbelievably sweet about everything.
The classic type tho, showing up to give your roses and meeting your parents. Embarrassing by everything your parents say.
Ace was so sweet that your parents eve joke about y’all getting married and all that. It’s safe to say that the both of y’all left the house redder than the tie Ace was wearing.
As soon as y’all drove off tho, you were in total control of the date. All that Ace knew was what Garp and the others told them, so the rest of the night was all up to you.
Ace looked hella awkward when It came to the party. Ace is all down for a good party but a formal one, so not his thing. So a lot of the night he was following your lead.
Obnoxious eating? Yes. Drinking a lot? Yup. Passing out afterwards and scarring the shit out of the others? Of course, it wouldn’t be a party without it!
Y’all would met up Sabo and his crew and just goofed around for the most part. Sabo joked about y’all being a couple and all that, y’all would sneak off the pull pranks on the teachers, piss of the love-dovey couple, then did it all again
When it came to dancing, you and some other girls would go dancing while Ace and the others watch from the outside. When the slow dance came on you bet your ass your dragging Ace out.
Very lazy slow dancing, your hands wrapped around his neck with your face buried in the crook of it, while Ace’s hands rested on your bottom. y’all would sway back and forwards just embracing each and enjoying the warmth. and then once the song was over, the 2 of y’all would end with a passionate kiss.
The night was a pretty simple night, Ace wasn’t to into the party so he didn’t want to do much. As long as he was with you, he doesn’t care. You didn’t want to stay the whole night either, you just wanted to make your appearance hang out with the others a bit then leave.
Once y’all leave, y’all send the rest of the night as Ace’s place. Watching movies, ruining yalls clothes, then passing out in some tangled position. The drinks, food, and sore muscles is a problem for the morning
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Sabo
Prom king and queen hands down. It’s just a known fact. Going with this man means the nights gonna be almost perfect.
Y’all would be the couple that has matching outfits. Like your dress with match Sabo’s blue tie, stuff like that. He would also spoil you as much as he could too when it comes to getting ready, like he’ll pay for you to get your nails and hair done.
And when it comes to the night of the dance he’ll pick you up, give you flowers, talk with your family, take you out to dinner, then y’all will arrive at the yall walk hand in hand to the ball room. As if y’all were royalty. From there on out, y’all let whatever happens.
When y’all arrive, Sabo was quick to find Ace and his date. You know damn well your not gonna enjoy the party without him. You didn’t mind tho, whenever the 2 of them are together crazy stuff always happens.
Not only does Sabo buddy up with Ace most of the night, but Ace is a social guy, having ties with a lot of people. So y’all spend a lot of the time hanging out with other people. Of course Sabo’s not going anyways where without his date. So if your not going Sabo ain’t either.
Not much time is spent on the dance floor because y’all are always with some group of people goofing off and talking. But once the slow dance comes on the 2 of y’all are definitely gonna be floor dancing.
Similarly to Ace, y’all have a very lazy dance style. Your hands around his neck and his hands wrapped around your waist. A few words would be exchanged between y’all but besides that’s y’all just enjoy each other’s embrace.
Y’all do end up staying most of the night. The plan was to leave a little after the slow dance after y’all had finished talking to everyone. Y’all were gonna join Ace and his date do a double movie date at their house. But everyone insisted y’all stay
So y’all end up staying bc luckily enough this is when y’all are named prom king and queen, it’s was mostly sabo who won but everyone still voted you too bc let’s be honest y’all are still a perfect couple.
But after the crowning y’all basically said your thanks you and all that then snuck off with Ace and his date to crash at their place.
It was a very active night with you and sabo talking with everyone and then being named prom king and queen. And as always to end a very active night, the 2 of y’all cuddle in each other arms and just savor the embrace of each other.
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Monkey D. Luffy
Very spontaneous with this one. You don’t even know your going with him until like 3 days before. And he didnt event bother to ask you, someone brought up the question in which Luffy answered, “Oh, I’m taking s/o.” Never once did you hear anything about it
But although you had 3 days to buy a dress and schedule hair and make up appointments, you went anyways. A party with Luffy and the Strawhats, no way your were gonna miss out on this.
Now Luffy’s not as romantic as his brothers but he’s knows that he at least has to take you out to dinner, he mostly heard that from Grap and the others. However Garp seemed to forget to see Luffy when. But you got into the car you thought he just simply forgot, but it wouldn’t till after dance would he take you.
The dance it’s was a whole experience. You wouldn’t expect any less tho. With the strawhats involved it always a party that either ends in 2 ways: 1- in disaster or 2- not a planned at all.
To start of with, somehow they were able to find the alcohol?? Which shouldn’t even be on the school grounds?? And they were already drinking it like no tomorrow. Zoro was on his 5th glass already and Nami was in a drinking contest
Brook took control of the Dj booth was just playing songs at random, ‘big green tracker’ by Jason aldean then ‘kiss me more’ by Doja cat, then some classical track
Usopp and Franky were doing god knows what. Something to do with the lightings or something. Making the dance floor much more like a club. Sanji was chancing off a group of girls around the floor, and then finally Robin and Chopper were just in the back enjoying the food
They were all over the place but it’s what makes them the life of the party. Even though they were all over the place and doing their out think, Luffy was jumping around everywhere too but he still knows that y’all are on a date, so where ever he goes you follow behind.
This prom is definitely going down in school history. There is no way that people won’t be talking about it. Anything to do with the Strawhats goes down in history.
Of course unlike the others, y’all end up partying all night long and then crashing at some restaurants Luffy promised he’d take you. Although it wasn’t much of a prom date, you still enjoyed the time you spent with the others. And Luffy made sure to keep you close to his side all night long.
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Trafalgar Water D Law
Law was that one cool senior, who had like a cool car and all that. With that being said, you were his 1 year younger lover. So while he doesn’t go to school anymore, he was still your date to prom.
Practically the talk of the school when y’all arrive, not because y’all are still dating but mostly because you were able to keep up with someone like him. With Law being cool he was still kinda a jerk, so having you with him was a relief
So law may be a jerk but he’s is a romantic one at least. Like sabo, he picks you up and gives you a bunch of flowers, he not to social with your parents but they are still cool with him. Then take you out to dinner
At dinner you joke about how he just left high school and now he’s back and how awkward it would be to see his old teachers. Of course, he doesn’t care. Law was more curious to see how the night played out. His senior year he didn’t go to prom so it’s the first with you.
When y’all first get to the party, Law’s pretty much glued to your side. Not because he find it awkward and uncomfortable but he just doesn’t know anyways besides the teachers. So you take him around and introduce him to all your friends.
Whether you introduced a boy or girl, Law kept a hand on you the whole time, almost as a way of saying that your his. This is when you first realized just how intimidating Law is. He really does seem to only have a soft spot for you. So when it come to dancing, Law stood near the wall letting you enjoy the dance floor with your friends without him.
He made sure to scare of any boy who got to close tho, as he watched you with such an intense gaze. However once the slow dance come on that all changed. You dragged Law out to the dance floor where y’all were both surrounded by a bunch of other couples.
Surprisingly for how much Law doesn’t say he’s not a good dancer he was amazing when it came to the slow dance. He was such a passionate dancing too, but so much love in the dance. With y’all’s hands intertwined and his hands resting on your hip and yours on his shoulder, the 2 of y’all swayed back and forward.
However once the slower dance was over, y’all really had no other reason to stay. So you law and a few other friends snuck out and just crashed at some bar where y’all celebrated both prom and graduation that was coming up soon.
Although Law already graduated, he would never miss an opportunity to share a drink and few heated kisses between his tipsy lover.
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tezzbot · 3 years ago
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applejack headcanons in a sort of timeline i have in my head based on the flashbacks/statements in the show lol this is gonna get long i apologise
aj is born in the sweet apple acres barn to bright mac and pear butter :D
we get the apple family reunion episode flashback where she is lichrally baby asking for apple fritters 🥺
she grows up a bit, just by family gene pool luck shes a strong little fucker and as she grows her family realises she's not just physically strong but strong willed too, it becomes a running joke that shes secretly part mule with how stubborn she can be :P
bright mac had a dog from when he was younger that he loved with all his heart, big mac loved him too but applejack thought was a grumpy old lump of a beast she just Did Not Like This Animal you know how kids can be lmaooo
applejack and big mac dont really leave the farm all that much, theyre homeschooled by their parents and granny smith so, generally they dont have that many friends their age in their childhood, they say hi and play a bit with fillies and colts they pass while helping out with deliveries, aj and rarity possibly have a few interactions through this but nothing really sticks at this point, they know each others names and thats probably it, the apple siblings are a big hit with usual customer and ponies who sell them things in the market
pear butter teaches aj how to play the guitar and she practices until her hooves hurt, her ma is very proud of her, they like to play duets when they have some alone time :] then, deciding to branch out from that applejack also picks up other instruments like the banjo and the fiddle, they find out she has quite a knack for music! (applejack is only slightly disappointed she doesnt get her cutie mark from it, but unlike applebloom would be in the future, she doesnt mind all that much, after all granny smith always said it'd come with time 😌)
not long after little applebloom is born we get the great seedling episode flashback which is a turning point in applejack, a moment like finding out santa or the tooth fairy isnt real, she matures a little bit that day, gains more of the work ethic we see in her as an adult
around this time is when bright mac and pear butter die :( i dont have a concrete headcanon on How they die but the dangerous trade routes the apples have to take to make deliveries may have had something to do with it, or maybe they were trying to protect the farm from something coming from the everfree forest, im not sure
the rest of the apple family make their way to sweet apple acres to give their condolences and help out in any way they can around the farm while our apples grieve :( its sad but it brings aj and big mac closer than they'd ever been
after shes recovered a little from that, i think aj kind of loses herself, i mean how can you not after losing both parents :(( so she decides to leave the farm in the hopes she'll be able to find herself again in manehattan, this is the cutie mark chronicles flashback and where she realises she belongs in ponyville, Runs home and gets her cutiemark
after a little bit, to help her become a little bit more social with foals her age, applejack goes to camp friendship where she meets little coloratura and the two Immediately click, aj gives her new best friend the nickname rara and they're practically inseparable the whole summer, their friendship starts to grow into something more but rara is heading back to manehatten after camp and applejack belongs back in ponyville, so they decide to give a lonb distance relationship a try, they manage to exchange letters back and forth for a long time, ultimately deciding a long distance relationship wasnt gonna work so they mutually decide to break up but still stay pen pals! after a while, the letters stop and they become just a memory in one anothers minds
sweet apple acres eventually returns to a business as usual state, with groups of relatives stopping by the farm now and again to give a helping hoof considering its now run by a late-middle aged lady, two children and a baby lol, applejack, while still doing a lot of tree bucking, is starting to take on a more maternal figure role in applebloom's life as well as being her sister, her and big mac feels more responsible and protective of the foal since she would be growing up with no ma and pa, they sort of took on those roles, applejack more intensely i guess i just see her as having strong maternal instincts embedded in her or something lol, but she for sure isnt "single mom"ing it, with granny smith and other relatives ready to take the little bugger when aj needs to get stuff done :P it takes a village and all that lmao
since at this time aj and big mac are starting to go into town more often and are free to do as they please as long as their chores get done, they start actually interacting more with teens their age in ponyville! applejack starts hanging out with fillies like rarity who she had known in passing but now could finally get to know and the cake's new apprentice and ponyvilles youngest party planner, pinkie pie
after starting to hit some awkward growth spurts as she reaches her teens lol, she starts taking an interest in the business side of the farmwork too, dealings with customers, looking into trade routes stuff like that, this is when the where the apple lies flashback takes place i fuckin love that episode please watch it, and this starts applejack's lifelong promise to never lie ever again which she keeps bc shes a legend as fuck <3
one day aj notices cloudsdale passing through probably to start preparing ponyville for the next season, and she hears a Thud coming from a row or two over from where she's working, she goes over to investigate to find a pegasus filly shaking off what aj can only assume was a crash, she asks if shes alright, n the filly is like of course i am im so tough toughest around actually thanks<3 and aj is internally like hm. this kids kinda annoying. they introduce themselves and applejack finds out rainbow dash is looking for her friend fluttershy, she likes to come down from cloudsdale to play with animals or something, but applejack hasnt seen any yellow pegasi fillies around so the little blue filly says thanks anyway and zips off at what aj can only describe as probably the speed of light, she somehow has a strange feeling this isnt gonna be the last she sees of this kid
she turns out to be right when shes invited to a happy visit to ponyville from cloudsdale party thrown for rainbow and fluttershy, apparently rainbow had bumped into pinkie while asking around ponyville for any idea where fluttershy and of course pinkie Had to make an event out of it once she had helped rainbow find her friend, the party was of course a lot of fun rainbow and aj somehow managed to turn every party game into a competition and despite their first impressions of one another they actually got along really well and gained a good amount of respect for each other, aj eventually found fluttershy sort of hiding away from most of the party and fluttershy actually opened up a little after talking with aj bc of how calming her presence was for her
over the next few years the five got to know each other quite well, anytime cloudsdale passed by rainbow and fluttershy would drop into ponyville to hang out or just say hi, and once they were old enough they moved into their ponyville houses and the five of them became just a regular friend group youd see hanging out on the streets of ponyville, fluttershy helps aj pick out a border collie puppy for help with wrangling critters on the farm (applebloom was getting too old to be sent off to mindlessly run after little animals all the time and she had started going to school so she wasnt around as much lmaoo) and just as a companion for applejack, she names her Winona :]
and then after those few years Twilight shows up! you know the rest from there :P
if i missed anything uhhh whoops<3 lol
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pearldouglas · 4 years ago
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forever stuck in our youth- ch 1
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summary: A CUTE LIL FIC ABOUT A SUMMER CAMP CLOSING AND A WEEKEND GETAWAY, A SLOW BURN FIC
pairing: platonic obx cast x y/n, eventual drew starkey x reader
word count: 1.7k
a/n: so i didn’t want to write about (redacted) being rudy’s gf since i know like 3/4′s of the fandom is not a fan of her so i made up an oc and yes.... she’s me. i also gave jd a gf too, just go with it bc he deserves just as much love. also i have no idea if madison used to work at a summer camp, pls don’t question it
When Madison walks into the hair and makeup department of set one morning, you can immediately tell she’s upset.
“What’s up, buttercup?” you ask as she sits down in her usual chair. She lets out a long sigh and you frown as you take her hair out of the top knot sitting on top of her head, wondering what’s got her in such a bad mood.
“I just found out the summer camp I used to work at is closing down,” she rests her cheek on her palm and pouts. “I know it’s silly to be upset about it but I really loved it there, it was a big part of my life. Kinda felt like a place I grew up is just getting torn down.”
“It’s not silly,” you reassure her quickly, giving her shoulder a quick squeeze in attempt to comfort her. “I loved summer camp, I can see why you’re so upset.”
“I just wish I could at least go say goodbye to it,” Madison sighs again before looking down at her hands. You’re quiet for a few seconds as you begin to think, the silence filling the trailer uncomfortably.
“Well then, why don’t you?” you ask. She looks up immediately at your reflection in the mirror with her nose scrunched up in confusion.
“What are you talking about?” she asks.
“Filming for this season is almost over, you’ve got a lot of time on your hands. Why don’t you go spend a weekend or something? I’d even go with you! It could be tons of fun!” you smile brightly at her. Madison turns around to look at your face, her eyes bright and full of hope.
“Really? You’d do that?” she asks, her voice about to break. You nod rapidly.
“What’s going on in here?” Madelyn asks as she walks into the trailer, you assume Chase isn’t far behind her.
“Y/N and I are gonna take a trip to the old summer camp I used to work with, you should come!” Madison says, her voice now happy and full of life.
“Is this just a girls trip? Because if so, you know I will be crashing,” Rudy’s voice startles you, you turn around and see him sitting in the back of the trailer and you wonder how long he had been sitting there or how you didn’t notice him before.
“Why don’t we all go?” Madison suggests. “Cline, Chase, JD, Y/N, Mariah, Rudy you could even bring Lily if you wanted.”
“That sounds like so much fun!” Madelyn says as she jumps up and down and claps her hands excitedly.
Rudy smiled at the mention of his girlfriend. “JD will want to bring Tayla too,” he points out.
“That’s totally fine.”
“Great, I’ll be the only single one there,” you let out a laugh, Madison hits you in the stomach lightly with the back of her hand. 
“Shut up, it will still be fun,” she assures you and you nod along with her words.
“I know, I can’t wait!”
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About a week goes by when suddenly you find yourself packing all your summer essentials in one suitcase and sleeping soundly in a car as you and all your loud friends make your way to what Madison had described as ‘a little piece of my childhood.’ You were excited, really, but watching all the cute couples around you made your heart sink. Sure, you were all happy for them, but you wanted someone to experience a summer romance with you too.
“So I talked to the guy who owns the camp,” Madison explains as she turns around in the front seat to look back at the rest of you. “He said that he left a lot of the old equipment there and that we’re free to use any of it since it’s probably just gonna be donated at the end of the summer anyway.”
“What kind of equipment are we talking about?” Rudy calls from the very back seat.
“Fishing poles, bunk beds, oh and did I mention jet skis?” Madison smiles which causes the whole car to erupt in loud cheers.
“What did you wanna do first, baby?” Mariah asks as she looks over at her girlfriend. Madison reaches over and grabs her hand.
“I think we should settle in first, unpack and get everything ready, then we can go for a good old fashioned swim in the lake. After it gets dark out maybe we could have a bonfire and make s’mores or something?”
“That sounds amazing,” Mariah smiles.
The ride continues on, the sound of all your friends conversations are drowned out by your headphones. Eventually you feel a soft shake of your shoulder and open your eyes only to realize you had fallen asleep on Jonathan’s shoulder.
“Sorry,” you mumble, your cheeks growing an intense shade of red as you took off your headphones.
“No big deal,” JD lifts his shoulders into a shrug. “I just wanted to wake you up since we’re here.” You look out the window and see a bright red cabin sitting under the sun.
You smile and immediately jump out of the car, shielding your eyes from the brightness as you take in your surroundings. It looks just like a cliche summer camp with an arch over the cabin door that says the camp name. You get a feeling you’re on the set of a bad 80′s horror movie.
“So where are we staying?” Chase asks as he pulls suitcases out from the back of the van. You can’t tell if hes being sarcastic or not, considering the bright red double story cabin standing proudly in front of you.
“This is where the counselors would stay,” Madison explains as she gestures to the large building. “And the campers would stay a little farther down. The counselors have a bit more privacy and it’s nicer but technically speaking if you wanna be alone you can stay in the campers cabin.”
“Can we go look at the campers cabins?” you perk up. Madison turns to look at you with her nose scrunched slightly in confusion “As much as I love all of you guys, I don’t really wanna be rooming with only couples and hearing what you guys get up to in the middle of the night.” this causes Rudy to laugh.
“No, you definitely do not,” he agrees as he wraps his arms around his girlfriend whose face you notice is getting significantly pinker. JD lets out a gag.
“Yeah, I can show you the way to those cabins. Are you sure you want to be all alone though? It can get a little scary at night,” Madison asks you, her voice suddenly full of concern. You purse your lips together and nod your head.
“Yeah, I mean how bad can it really be?”
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Bad, the answer to that question was.
It turns out unpacking and settling in took much longer than expected and you were all exhausted by the end of it, plus the sun had already gone down so there was no point in trying to go swimming and you were all too tired to start a fire. So you all just decided to call it a night.
And being alone in the campers cabin was definitely not a good idea.
First off, it was freezing at night so you were left to wrap yourself up tightly in your blankets. Secondly, it was so loud. The animals outside decided it would be a good idea to scream outside your window so you were left listening to owls and wolves howl the entire night. However you would have much rather preferred those noises to the ones you were sure were coming from Rudy and Lily’s room.
And lastly, no one talks about how scary it is to be alone at night.
You thought you hadn’t been scared of being alone at night since you were a little kid. Turns out old habits really die hard. You were sure someone was going to burst through the front door and put a bag over your head and drag you off into the night with you kicking in screaming. So naturally this resulted in you having horrible nightmares and a bad nights sleep. But you refused to tell that to your friends when you met up for breakfast in the morning.
“Hey, how did everyone sleep?” Madison greets, holding her cup of coffee with both hands and close to her face in attempts to warm herself up.
“Great!” Rudy announces, his mouth full of his breakfast.
“From the sounds and looks of it, you didn’t get much sleep did you?” you tease him, looking over at Lily who has tired eyes and is in the middle of a yawn. Rudy shrugs.
“What about you, y/n? How was your experience alone out in the campers cabin?” JD perks up, desperate to change the subject.
“From the sounds of it, I think I slept better than all of you guys combined,” you joked even though it was a complete lie. Everyone in the group laughs.
“Are we ready to go swimming?” Chase asks, throwing his napkin down on his plate.
“Aren’t we supposed to wait 30 minutes until after eating to go swimming?” Mariah asks.
“Isn’t that bullshit?” Madelyn rebuttals.
“LAST ONE IN THE WATER IS A ROTTEN EGG!” Rudy calls as he stands up and runs out of the room, JD running quickly after them which causes Tayla and Lily to yell for them.
“None of us are wearing our bathing suits!”
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Eventually, everyone did make it down to the water. Rudy ended up beating JD in their mini race which resulted in JD pushing him off the dock which made everyone laugh, even Lily. Everyone else jumped in the water after that and were swimming around for a while before someone spoke up.
“Are we expecting anyone else?” Lily asked.
“No, why?” Madison asked. Lily points to the front of the camp where another car is pulling up. Turns out, this is a campy horror movie which will result in your death.
“Is that-” Chase starts. “No way, he said he couldn’t make it this weekend.”
“Who? What? What are you guys talking about?” you ask as you examine everyones faces and notice it was someone they all recognized. Then, out of the car, wearing swim trunks and a button up, steps out one of your close friends.
“I finished up filming early, now the fun has arrived!” Drew yells, causing you to smile.
Looks like you won’t be the only single one on this trip after all.
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A/N: AYYYY FIRST CHAPTER IS UP!!!! this fic is based off a cute dream i hate that i told tayla @taylathornton​ about and she persuaded me to write a fic about it so.... here it is. also i hate the ending to this but whatever.
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akvtsuki-ari · 5 years ago
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Sweetheart (Ch.1)
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Warnings: Mentions of BDSM and bunch of other kinks but nothing sexual in this chapter lol. Sub!Spencer and Femdom!Reader 
Length: 5.3k 
Authors Note: this is hands down the most self-indulgent shit ive ever wrote but do i care? the answer is no dsjk  but this that series i had planned where the reader introduces spencer to proper BDSM and all that. hoping to make this fic kinda informative also lol. also im uploading this fic on ao3 as well. also no tags for this fic bc its really specific and ill probably be writing for it for a while! sorry about that
Plot Summary: Spencer Reid just wanted to be.., well, you know. He doesn’t expect to find much when he signs up for a BDSM dating website but somehow he manages you and he couldn’t be more delighted
Spencer Reid was certainly a lot of things. He was a lover of the arts, someone who had a particular affinity for 15th-century literature, a magician at best, a theater nerd at worst, and a teacher when life called for it. He loves the world even when it's really dark and he loves sleeping in even more. He loves his friends and they love him too - even when they pretend that his random facts annoy them. Spencer Reid was a friend, an FBI agent, a genius with an IQ of 187, and a son to a mother he loves wholly. He was a lot of things and for the most part - he knew a lot about what he really loved to do. He supposed that it's been like that his whole life.
It's not everyday that he discovers something new about himself. About everything else? Always. He loves to learn, but about himself? There's never all that much on the frontier.
It's hard to say, because of that, when Spencer discovered he was a sub. It's difficult to pinpoint a specific time and place, or even how the pieces got put together. He just remembers how it felt when it hit him, like a freight train going 100 miles an hour into a concrete wall. Or a plane crashing onto an island. Or like a fly hitting the glass panes of a delivery truck. He remembers the feeling when he was deftly reminded of this fact. Spencer Reid was a sub - through and through and he wasn't really sure what to make of it.
Surprisingly to most of his direct peers, Spencer wasn't a virgin. He'd had sex with 2 people who he'd been kinda friends with at some point, but it always got a little weird after that. The second time though, the girl ended up choking him a little bit when she got off and Spencer thought he had died. Not in a bad way, more in a "I'm so turned on by this I feel like I've genuinely gone to heaven," sort of way. He didn't think it was possible for a sexual encounter to make him feel like that but it did. It didn't stop after that either, which was the most agitating part. 
Spencer doesn't consider himself a sexual person. Sex is about intimacy and companionship, and hopefully love when he finds that someday. Sex isn't necessarily about pleasure but that wasn't an easy lesson to learn.
Spencer just wanted to understand - so like any great genius he participated in thought experiments. It's normally a female superhero/supervillain that crosses his mind (he has an affinity for Poison Ivy), and he just kinda imagines what it would be like if they did what she did. The choking turned him on, but it wasn't enough. Through that, he figures out that he had more than a choking kink and that he was more than a little interested in a partner having complete access to him. He thought about it for weeks and the getting off was working for him but he couldn't get the fantasy out of his head. He wanted more - he wanted someone to fulfill his wishes.
It was too much for him to ignore. Those months of being able to hold off through masturbating are over and he's just sorta itching. Aching to act on those impulses with another person who can give him what he needs, and he doesn't want it to be transactional. Maybe it's too ideal to want a partner out of such an endeavor but was it so wrong? To want real affection and romance from someone who could also overpower him wasn't a crime and he'd be damned if he pretended to want any less. Spencer was just searching, even if it was rather desperately. 
So, when Spencer finds himself on a BDSM dating site and he feels like his life is in shambles, he can only blame himself. It's not something he'd normally do but he's getting a little more than relentless about it but he also just wants to see what's out there. He's so out of it was it happens, it felt like he was being possessed as he made a fake email and wrote out his account information. Definitely blaming it on possession, he thinks. 
It's too late to go back, as he scrolls through tons of profiles of rather intense looking people. He's not surprised, this is where people go to express themselves. They're entitled to that, it just sucks since he's just not ready for such levels of intensity. He wonders if he's in too deep yet, but he figures he'd hit that mark a long time ago and keeps scrolling through profiles. There wasn't much to go off of, many people not choosing to use photos for the sake of anonymity, which was good for Spencer. He clicks onto his own profile, reading his own bio carefully.
USERNAME: DOC187 
SUB/ SWITCH / DOM 
M / F / O
FETISHES: N/A
BIO: Interest in a dominant female companion. Completely inexperienced.
Spencer feels ridiculous, but he doubts anyone would even message him. He doesn't have much on his profile and he keeps things short for that purpose. He wanted to stay as low to the ground as possible - more curious to explore what was going in the world than to find anything legitimate. He scrolls through hundreds of profiles, mostly of people who were BDSM vets looking for new connections or fun. Some people catch his eye but they don't match his interests so he doesn't bother.
Except, one profile. The bio was beyond interesting to Spencer.
USERNAME: MISS—LILAC
SUB / SWITCH / DOM 
M / F / O 
FETISHES: Sadomasochist, Degradation, Humiliation, Pegging, Overstimulation, Edging, Crossdressing, Exhibitionism, Mutual Masturbation, Dacryphilia, Shibari/Gags/Bondage, Wax Play, Impact Play, Breath Play, General Sensation Play, Discipline, Collaring, Begging. Willing to try most things. 
BIO: Interested in submissive males of any experience level. Helps if you're interesting and like to read and watch indie films. Looking for genuine connection and plenty of good banter. Curly hair is nice too. lol.
Before Spencer can think about it for too long his mouse clicks over that stupid little message button next to your profile. Spencer shakes his head at his own existence as he types you a message. Says you're online right now, but Spencer's sure he won't get a response for a while.
DOC187: Seems I fit who you're interested in. I even have the curly hair.
Spencer chews on his nails anxiously before he sighs at himself. He has no clue what's gotten into him belle before he can think he sees your 3-dotted bubble pop up. He feels his body wracked with nerves.
MISS—LILAC: I'm guessing you like to read and watch indie films too?
Spencer smiles. You seem interesting and the fact that the two of you were just talking normal was making Spencer happy.
DOC187: Indeed. I'm a sucker for 15-century literature and anything in Russian and foreign language. You?
MISS—LILAC: 15th century huh? I'll assume Chaucer. And Russian? You're interesting, doc. I'm more modern and English, hope you're not deterred.
Spencer smiles, surprised that you recognize an author as niche as Chaucer. He shakes his head at your commentary. He almost forgets that both of you are on a BDSM dating site and the irony doesn't escape him.
DOC187: Deterred? Never. I think you're rather interesting too, Miss Lilac.
MISS—LILAC: Ever the gentleman doc. I'm hoping you won't run away if I ask you more personal questions.
Spencer swallows. He types back quickly.
DOC187: What kinds of questions?
MISS—LILAC: If it's okay, you're real name and what you do. My names Y/N, and I'm a florist. I live in DC and I love romance novels.
Spencer smiles. He appreciates you laying down the path for him, knowing the stakes.
DOC187: My names Spencer and I work for the FBI. I also live in DC, and I love magic.
MISS—LILAC: Magic? I'd love for you to show me sometime.
Spencer swallows. Part of him feels like it's a stupid idea to ask you out so early but if you asked, he'd likely say yes. He decides to wait it out.
DOC187: I'd be more than happy to show you.
MISS—LILAC: I suppose you could send me a video but that's not the same as seeing the magic in real life, now is it?
Spencer is smiling like an idiot at this point. He shakes his head a little, jittery.
DOC187: Infinitely better live, I would say.
MISS—LILAC: Seems like I've found an excuse to ask you on a date then. Saturday's work for me but I'm sure it depends on you, FBI man. Before that, I'm gonna drop my number and I'll be expecting your call. (XXX-XXX-XXXX)
Spencer giggles. It's a little out of range for things he's used to doing, giggling aloud for someone else is certainly new. Spencer picks up his phone and dials away, anxious to call you but excited nonetheless. He heard you pick up the phone and his heart catches in his throat.
"Hello?," Your voice is smooth, and a little bit lower than he was expecting. It sounds pretty.
"Hello, Y/N," Spencer says back. He heard you laugh on the other side and can't help the way his heart flutters.
"Lovely to talk to you doc,"
"Still Doc? Not Spencer?" Spencer questions. You smile on the other side of the line.
"Doc seems to fit you. But, for the sake of formality, hello Spencer,"
"I like Doc too, but it feels like I should have a nickname for you as well. Only seems fair," Spencer says laughing quietly.
"If it's your prerogative you can call me Miss Lilac, or just Miss but..." you trail off for a minute. Spencer squints.
"Miss is a title, you know? Doesn't seem fair for you to call me that when I haven't earned it from you yet. I'm sure we'll get there but for now you can just call me Y/N," you say softly. Spencer blushes bright red, his voice betraying him as he speaks.
"O-Oh, well um - where does the name Lilac come from? Normally people go with their names when it comes to stuff like that," Spencer says shyly. He heard you laugh on the other side of the phone and blushes again, grateful you can't see him.
"I love the language of flowers and flowers themselves. It's a way to speak that not many people know - but I like the meaning and look of lilacs. White lilacs represent purity, so that was a bit of irony, but light purple lilacs mean first love," you say carefully.
"First love?," Spencer asks. You bite your lip for a moment.
"I joke that BDSM is my first love since it's such a big part of my life. Not as big as some but not small for certain. It gave me much needed confidence so I joke that it was my first," You say lightly. You hear Spencer giggle on the other side and you smile.
"What about your username? Any significance to DOC187 that I should know of?," you readjust your seat on your couch as you talk. Spencer grows a bit embarrassed.
"I normally introduce myself as Doctor Spencer Reid for work, not a medical doctor but I have three PhD's," Spencer admits. You raise your brows but hear the hesitation in his voice.
"Very, very impressive doc. What about the 187? It could be a plain ol' number but my guess would be otherwise,"
"That's my IQ, actually. I don't think intelligence can be boiled down and quantified like that but I couldn't think of anything else," Spencer explains.
"So you're a certified genius with 3 PhD's? To say I'm impressed is an understatement. Anything else impressive you'd like to tell me before I totally pick your brains," you say a little shocked.
"You wanna pick my brains?," Spencer asks. You wanna laugh at the irony of such a silly question from such an intelligent man but you refrain.
"Who wouldn't?," you say incredulously. Spencer smiles shyly.
"The only other thing is that I can read 20,000 words per minute," Spencer says trying to deflect. Your jaw dropped before but it manages to unhinge a little further.
"There's a lot to get to know about you Doctor Reid,"
"I'm sure it's the same for you," Spencer replies.
"Guess we'll have to find out won't we?," you say smiling.
Damn, Spencer got lucky. Hopefully he'd get to find out soon
_____
"Reid, are you listening?," Derek's voice snaps Spencer out of his entranced state. His smiling expression snaps up to look at Derek who looks a little exasperated.
"Sorry, what was that?," Spencer asks back. Derek puts down the case file they were working on. They had just finished a case and needed to complete some paperwork before submitting it for review and to be used in court. The job was given to him and Morgan and Spencer was evidently distracted.
"Alright, kid - what is up with you? All case you've been checking your phone non-stop and spacing out, all smiles and giggles. C'mon now kid, seriously. You got a little lady at home waiting for you or is there something else I don't know about?," Derek interrogates. Spencer doesn't really know what to make of it, though it's not really in his interest to hide you, it hasn't really come up with anyone on the team yet so it was proving difficult to decide what to do. The smile on his face manages to appear again as he starts to think about you, the tips of his ears red.
"Reid," Morgan says again, with a small look of irritation.
"Her names Y/N," Spencer blurts out faster than he can't think. Derek gives him a huge grin, holding his hand out to dap Spencer up. Spencer just looks at it confused for a second before getting the memo.
"'My man," Derek says chuckling. Before Spencer can continue Prentiss, JJ, and Garcia walk in. Hotch is the only one missing, and Spencer's a little grateful.
"What are we celebrating in here you guys?," Prentiss asks first. Spencer goes to say something to move away from his sudden confession but Derek is quick to cut him off.
"Our boy genius over here got him a little lady," Derek announces. The whole team erupts in questions and Spencer wants to bury himself.
"Congratulations, Spencer!! How long have you two been dating?," Prentiss asks.
"You guys are so dramatic. It's only been two months but no first date because well..." Spencer trails off. JJ just nods her head.
"Duty calls, I'm guessing" JJ finishes. Spencer nods deflated hearing Emily draw a breath between her teeth.
"That's tough, Spence,"
Just as Spencer goes to give a response back he gets a text from you that makes his day a little better. It's a selfie of you at work, a picture your employee must've taken of you in a room full of new flower deliveries. You're giving Spencer a toothy grin as you hold a bunch of gardenias in your hand.
Y/N 🌸: *image attachment* 
Gardenias// You're lovely + Secret Love <33
Spencer cannot control the way his whole face bunches up in a smile, as if there's no one else in the room with him. Everyone just looks at him surprised, Garcia giving him a side-eye.
"How can you guys trust this stranger? We don't even know who she is! I haven't even run any background checks on her," Garcia complains. Prentiss nudges her side.
"I don't know if it matters - look at how hard he's smiling over there," Prentiss says. Garcia reluctantly looks and can't help but sigh.
"Okay well he seems really happy but still! We don't even know her," she pouts.
"I'm sure we'll meet her soon," JJ snickers at Spencer's lovestruck expression. Derek leans over Spencer's shoulder and raises his brows.
"Is that her, kid?," Derek asks. Spencer nods, simply staring at the picture you sent. Derek whistles when he sees you - you're genuinely stunning and he's surprised to say the least.
"Hot mama, pretty boy - how'd you manage that?," Derek asks, dumbfounded. Emily rolls her eyes.
"C'mon Derek, I'm sure - oh wow," Emily leans over Spencer's shoulder to see you and is met with the same reaction. JJ and Garcia are quick to follow thereafter, both looking equally as surprised.
"She's..." JJ trails off. The rest of the team just nods as Spencer grins ear to ear.
Spencer 🐻: Beautiful, as always.
Spencer ignores the rest of the team as they look at each other in disbelief.
Y/N🌸: Me or the flowers, Doc?
Spencer🐻: Both, but mostly you.
"Wow, Spencer you're really -" Prentiss starts
"You're whipped, kid. I mean seriously whipped," Derek finishes, nodding in agreement. JJ can't help but smile, giving Spencer a small pat on the back.
"She seems lovely, Spencer. How'd you two meet?," JJ says. Garcia stands around looking rather suspicious. A blush creeps onto Spencer's neck as he's reminded of how you two met.
"Online," Spencer says shortly. No one decides to question it, and Spencer thanks every god he can think of.
"Have you two FaceTimed yet? How can we know she's not, I don't know - catfishing you? Or scamming you in some other cyber criminal way?," Garcia sounds distressed. Spencer gives a small smile.
"We fall asleep over FaceTime every night," Spencer admits. Penelope's expression falls, and Prentiss gives a smile.
"That is disgustingly cute," JJ says laughing.
"Okay, well - I'm still running a background check on her," Garcia says stubbornly "But, I'm happy for you,"
"Thanks Garcia," Spencer mumbles out as he texts you again.
Y/N🌸: I wanna see you, love
Spencer blushes red as he reads your message. The word love makes his whole face hot.
Spencer🐻: I can't take a selfie for my life
Y/N🌸: You're with your team aren't you? Get them to take a picture of you.
Spencer wants to fold away, not ever really being the picture type, but how could he ever deny you.
Spencer🐻: How could I ever say no to you?
"Hey guys, can one of you take a picture of me for Y/N?" Spencer asks embarrassingly red. The whole team sends him a look of surprise.
"I'll take it Spence, try not to look as uncomfortable as you do right now," JJ says. The whole team refrains from laughing as Spencer gives an awkward smile. He thanks JJ who hands him back his phone before texting you again.
Spencer🐻: *image attachment* You owe me one
Y/N🌸: you're stunning as always. hadn't seen you in so long I almost forgot what you looked like.
Spencer🐻: stunnings an interesting choice of words.
Y/N🌸: I said what I said, doc. 
Spencer can't help but do a little giggle, that causes the whole team to give him a look. Morgan just shakes his head, shrugging. Emily, JJ, and Garcia just look at each other before the room draws into a subtle but comfortable silence as Spencer just smiles, totally unaware of how whipped he happened to look. He didn’t seem to mind either way. 
___
"How was work?," Spencer asks over the phone, kicking his shoes off as he looks into his fridge for something to eat. He hears you sigh on the other side of the line.
"Busy today - wedding season is coming up so tons of calls for centerpiece designs and costs. It's going well though, business couldn't be better," you say, clearly tired yet content. Spencer gives a small smile and feels relieved that things are going okay for you.
"That's really good. I'm glad you're feeling alright," Spencer replies. You ease into the couch as you talk to Spencer, relaxing by the second. 
"What about you, FBI man? You have an okay day?," Your voice is full of a gentle concern that Spencer appreciates.
"Yeah, just paperwork and JJ said that we shouldn't have any upcoming cases this week to be worried about so I have the weekend off," Spencer says without thought.
"Have any special plans for the weekend?," you say cheekily. Spencer, still not having caught on, shakes his head for a second.
"No, why?,"
"Hm... well - would you like to go on a date with me then Doctor Reid?," You ask, giggling. Spencer's eyes widen in realization as he facepalms for a moment.
"Wow, I didn't even think... yes - yes I would love to go on a date with you Y/N," Spencer says laughing at his own misfortune. You shake your head instinctively, but the growing smile and even further growing adoration makes it hard to sit still.
"Hey, Spencer," you say, butterflies filling your stomach.
"Yeah?"
"I really like you,"
____
Saturday comes quicker than Spencer can really understand. You told him not to worry about what the days plans would be but he can't help it. Anxiously awaiting you in front of the cafe that the two of you were supposed to meet at, in a part of town Spencer hasn't really seen before. You said that you'd lead the way and the irony isn't lost on him.
"Spencer?," Your voice is small, as you call out to what you think is Spencer Reid. Of course, you'd seen him before but to see him in person like this was still so unfamiliar. His head shoots up, eyes searching for you. He's delighted to have found you, certainly that was true as he walks towards you. Your arms envelop him in a friendly hug and he can't help but find himself sinking into. You smelled sweet, like fruit and flowers (which makes sense, the more he thinks about it)
"Lovely to finally meet you, Y/N,"
"Same goes for you, doc. Would you like to be informed of our plans for the day, or do you prefer the element of surprise?,"  You ask smiling. Spencer laughs at your question.
"Details would be appreciated, but I get the feeling you're not gonna give me those."
"You're right! It's a trick question, since it's a surprise. But, promise it'll be good,"
"I'll take your word for it then," Spencer says with a small smile. You hold your hand out for Spencer which he accepts, locking his hands with yours. The affection makes him feel full of warmth, as you lead him away for the day you had planned for the both of you.
___
Spencer underestimated how well you knew him. He really, really did. It's hard to explain since Spencers been on a date before but this was so profoundly different. He's a little touched, but beyond that he's just.. surprised? Every date he'd been on before this, he'd have to play the gentleman but it never seemed like the other person was interested in just him. It was always casual small-talk over dinner, or a mid-day coffee date or something else that just felt mundane but this was beyond Spencer's imagination.
The first place you took him was a bookstore - which was in Spencers mind already a winner for best date he'd ever been on. You walked inside with him and told him he had to pick up a book for you and you had to pick up a book for him and to say his heart absolutely fluttered would be an understatement. He picked up up a copy of "The Screwtape Tales," by C.S. Lewis for you, and you gave him a copy of Shel Silverstein's "Where The Sidewalk Ends." For you, you got a glimpse to see what Spencer's sense of humor was and you gave Spencer a piece of your childhood. Both equal but opposite forms of intimacy. The only thing was Spencer had to wait to read his book because it's relatively shorter than yours and he reads 20,000 words per minute.
The next place you took Spencer was an indoor butterfly garden. Does he have to explain why that's a good date? He heard you talk about all the scientific names for the different flowers and why they attract butterflies and he wasn't sure he could crush any harder on you if he tried. A particular moment sticks out to him on which a butterfly landed on your shoulders and just stayed there like it didn't want to leave. Spencer's eyes were fixated on it the whole time - and he had never wanted to be a butterfly in his life before but he figures there's a first time for everything.
The last place, where the both of you were at now was just a small coffee shop, locally owned and supported by the community here. You told Spencer that when you started up your shop, you'd come in here to work on big orders before you'd expanded enough to have employees. Spencer admires your work ethic, much more than he could ever anticipate as he sits down at a small booth, totally covering the both of you as you return to the table with a little plate of banana bread and two iced coffees. Spencer pouts as he looks up at you, watching you flash him a grin.
"I could've helped you carry this over," Spencer complains gently. You roll your eyes.
"Maybe next time doc," you say softly. You hold back your commentary often on the date, and Spencer pretends not to notice for your sake but he'd be lying if he said he didn't wanna know. You always had something sly to say but you'd kept it from him so many times now he figures it's better if he didn't ask.
Spencer looks at you as you push a plate of banana bread towards him. He looks at you with curious eyes before reading your clearly excited face and laughs. He picks up a piece and examines it, before taking a bite. If it tasted as good as it smelled then he would be more than obliged.
The involuntary moan that escapes Spencer's throat makes you choke with laughter. Shit, you weren't kidding when you said this was the best banana bread in the city. Spencer just looks up at you like he's about to cry with joy as you double over in giggles.
"I know," You say softly, taking a bite yourself eyes filling with joy "I ordered some more for us to take home - you're welcome," you say with confidence. Spencer smiles because that is genuinely thoughtful, but it was more endearing to see you pretend it wasn't. He just shakes his head, a blush arising to his face as he looks at you. You're staring at him with intent. He quirks his brow at you in question.
"I had a good time today, Spencer" You say warmly. You only called him Spencer when you were saying something affectionate and a bit serious. He gives you a toothy smile.
"I haven't been on very many dates, but this was easily the best one I'd ever been on," Spencer says honestly. You grin ear to ear, hands carefully holding Spencer across the table, running your thumb over his knuckles for a few seconds. You couldn't say for sure whether it was too soon to ask him to be your boyfriend, but you'd be damned if you said it didn't cross your mind.
Spencer was mind-numbingly unaware of what good boyfriend material he was, but beyond that - what good submissive boyfriend material he was. It was driving you nuts, but you knew this was all new for him and you didn't wanna freak him out. Even when guys say they're interested in being submissive, they're still often times uncomfortable with you being fully dominant. Dominant in public and in bed, if you will. You wanted to pay for dates, and buy him flowers, and make him feel special too - at least on the occasion. That role came naturally to you, that let me make you feel owned type affection that only a dominant person can give. It scared men off - out of relationships, and you totally got why - but you liked Spencer too much as a person to risk iit.
Spencer holds your hands together, gathering your attention. You looked at him spaced out and he gives you a look of concern.
"You okay?," Spencer asks. You nod, chewing your lip in debate of whether or not you should express your concerns. Spencer just tugs on your hand and looks at you intently.
You sigh, looking at Spencer softly.
"I'm okay I just really like you," you say a little exasperated. Spencer laughs but is filled with relief.
"I'm glad to hear that. What else is on your mind?,"
"I really like you - like in an, I want you to officially by my boyfriend way and I hope it's not too soon but I'm just, worried I guess," you say nervously. Spencer can't help the way his heart beats in his chest when he hears you say boyfriend. God did he want to be your boyfriend.
"What're you worried about?,"
"I'm worried about freaking you out. I can be a lot since I'm... you know?," You say nervously. Spencer looks at you  to continue.
"I'm more than just dominant in bed, and for a lot of guys it's not their thing and that's their right but I like you so much. I really don't want that to happen if I ask you out now and you realize that it's not for you," you say in clear upset.
Spencer looks at you in disbelief. You were worried that he was gonna freak out over that? That you were too dominant for him? It feels like such a silly concern but the expression on your face tells him you're speaking from experience.
"I mean, it's all kinda new to me but, well - I do like how you treat me? It's a nice change, I can't imagine myself getting tired of it, or of you. I really like you too," Spencer tried his best to reassure you without totally embarrassing you. You smiles at Spencer but your face is still full of doubt.
"If that ever changes, I'll tell you but I'd really like to call you my girlfriend," Spencer finishes. You can't help the warmth that spreads in your stomach at the offer. You just nod, looking up at him. You stand and walk to Spencer's side of the booth, sliding in next to him, leaning your head into his shoulder for a few while seconds. You sit back up, and Spencer turns to you.
"Hey, doc," you say softly. Spencer hums in acknowledgement.
"Can I kiss you?," you ask softly. Spencer chews his lip and nods, looking down at your lip. You're wearing lipgloss and it makes them look pretty - you are so pretty to Spencer.
Kisses are their own language, Spencer figures. The way someone kisses you can tell you a lot about who they are - so, when you put your hands on the side of Spencer's face, pulling him closer to you with such care and adoration - Spencer can feel what you were referencing earlier. The word Miss rings out in his mind, the way you pay attention to him with your hands. He feels your lips press against his, slowly gliding your fingers in his hair, thumb brushing agains the side of his cheek. Your other hand rested on his inner thigh and he has to think about anything other than that not to get hard. Spencer didn't get how much he'd been thinking about touching you until you'd do with no hesitation and he lets out a small whine. You pull back and Spencer has to catch his breath.
His lashes blink up at you and you're absolutely beaming.
"You're cute baby,"
Baby? Spencer wants to cover his face when you say it. You kiss him again and he can't help but feel flush.
You were Spencer's girlfriend and then some and he couldn't be more happy.
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okay-klepto · 4 years ago
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August Walker loves Big Girls
I watched MI: Fallout and I am on the train that August Walker dates exclusively big girls.  No, this is not up for debate.  If I say he prefers big girls, he prefers big girls.  No ifs, ands, or buts.
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And for the record, I am not talking about girls with big boobs and a big butt.  No, no, no.  I’m talking big butt, big (maybe) boobs, big arms, big tummy, big thighs, big calves, big cheeks.  BIG!  The more squish the better!
#1: Just look him him.  Big, chubby, curvy, plus sized, fat, round: whatever you call them, August wants them.  You cannot tell me this man hasn’t hit on every single plus sized lady he works with.  You cannot tell me that he doesn’t linger a little too long in front of Torrid when he goes to the mall.  Seeing curvy girls in swimsuits does him in every time.  
#2: I feel like Mission Impossible actually kinda verifies this?  Maybe he’s just a gent or maybe he was just focused on the mission, but I don’t think he ever really made eyes at any girls in the movies (there weren’t that many but whatever).  He’s not like Napoleon Solo; ladies with the bodies of Victoria’s Secret models do nothing for him.  He needs someone with a bit of boom, y’know?  
#3: He ABSOLUTELY dotes on every lady he is with.  He can be gone for months at a time depending on what he’s doing, so whenever he’s home, he never leaves her side.  He showers her in gifts (quite often pieces of lingerie), makes her favorite meals, and his hands never leave her skin.
Now, what everyone’s been waiting for.  In order to better explain, here is a little imagine scene (featuring you, the reader) for your enjoyment:
Where to begin?  Cuddling.  Spooning his is favorite bc he can put his arm under your shirt and around the largest and softest part of your tummy and smush his arm in to hold you tight.  When you two are just chilling on the couch, August likes to keep his hand either around your waist or on your thigh, rubbing it lovingly. You get lots of kisses and thigh rubs in bed when you're laying on his chest, too. He wants you in his arms at all time, especially after he gets back from a longer mission.  It sometimes hinders you ability to, like, do the stuff you want to do during the day, but you love him too.
He also loves giving you all of you favorite foods when he’s home.  August is not a picky eater, so whatever you want, he will happily eat.  He loves cooking with you, too, but he does get distracted watching you do your thing.  He also tends to want to snack and taste test things when you two are in the kitchen together, which you do not enjoy bc he will end up eating everything before the meal is even ready.  You want to have a meal, too!  August is also more than happy to go out to eat with you or get take out some nights.  You both like trying new foods to dinner time is a big event in your house some days. He does tend to eat all of the popcorn too fast during a movie night in.
August also loves everything you wear.  He will buy you just about anything you want, but you try not to ask for too much clothing.  August also likes getting clothes for himself, too.  Summer is his favorite season for you bc it means shorts and mini skirts and swimsuits. In his eyes, the more skin the better. Dresses and tops and shoes and jewelry are fun to get (oh yeah, he decks you out in fine jewelry), but he really prefers bringing home lingerie for you.  He is observant when you are shopping online.  If you start eyeing something you like, you can almost always expect it to show up a week or two later.  He loves seeing you all dressed up in something silky or lace at night.  He likes anything that you like to put on, but he enjoys taking it off more.
August would never dare mention or ask you about losing weight.  Never in a million years.  Health concerns are another thing.  If you go to the doctor and they mention you losing weight to help with another issue, August does not harp on you about losing weight.  You two can talk and figure out little changes to your diets, or he might ask if you want to come work out with him more often.  August believes that healthy and skinny are not synonyms.  If you ever expressed wanting to lose weight, August won’t stop you.  Your body is your body, but he does love all of those curves you sport.  That definitely helps when you are feeling self conscious about your body.  He showers you in love and compliments at even the smallest sign of shyness or sadness.  Anyone who says you don’t look like a goddess is flat out wrong.  But you’re August’s goddess.  If he catches anyone eyeing you, he goes full territorial and possessive animal mode.
Now for the smexy part.  I’m gonna cut to the chase: August just wants to eat the pussy.  August’s prefered way of dying is suffocating between your thighs while eating you out.  He kneels on the ground while you lay on the bed and he goes to town.  He doesn’t finish until you are crying and your legs are shaking.  And honestly, any position where we can watch you, he loves.  Sometimes he’s in the mood to do it from behind so he can smack your ass while ploughing in, but once again, whatever you want, he’s down for.  You wanna ride him?  Amazing, he can see every inch of you and he can play with your tits all he wants.  Missionary?  Wonderful.  He loves your tummy moving with every thrust.  Toys?  Bondage?  Spanking?  Almost any other kinky stuff?  As long as it’s with you, he’s down for trying it with you.  And if you've had a rough body image day, August is there is love every inch - every roll, every bump, every stretch mark, every single spot. It's praise and love and praise and love until you've completely forgotten what you worried aboit. You two will sometimes take a both together after particularly intense nights, and he loves being in the warm water with you with his hands around you.  He’ll kiss you neck and whisper sweet nothings to you for hours.  Then there is mandatory cuddling (preferably nude) in bed.  See above for those deets.
When you get together with August, he takes it upon himself to keep your pussy wet, ass fat, and heart happy bc no one in the world matters more to him than you.
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littlebabycrybtch · 4 years ago
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i genuinely feel like ableism is just intentionally being left the fuck behind as a social issue. all the twitter faketivists are just Over it man. pretending to be selfless and manipulating every unnecessarily critical thought they have into a ‘stance tm’ to validate their underdeveloped random feelings and make them actually seem like a moral obligation for others really has to be exhausting. i mean, they already support the groups theyre a part of which benefits them, and the groups they have to support if they want social praise from their peers, which also benefits them, why would they wanna support the ~ACTUALLY weird and different~ minorities, when it wont even benefit them??? which is ofc what real activism is about??? the benefits and clout??? god theyre so fake and so ready to have their one allotted slur they want the r word so bad they want their one cringe punching bag minority so baaaad they NEED to validate their discomfort with autistic people. with psychotic people. with the undiagnosed. and they get off scott free bc nobody will give them consequences. and when WE try to oh these ugly bitches ACTUALLY think theyre allowed a free pass for that bc they have anxiety and a personality disorder or w/e. lmao fuck you bitch, frankly fuck all that discourse about ‘autistic people arent rude!’, im gonna be so rude on purpose now. im gonna start flapping directly into allistic peoples eye sockets. 
lbr, the reason for all of this is 1. other minority groups are becoming more about how to be ~cool~ and trendy with it than just . focusing on actual struggles and harm reduction (see; lgbt exclusion behavior lmaog) and mentally ill/disabled ppl might have more trouble copying uncharming funnyman social traits (or are too smart for that) which makes us harder 2 respect ofc :( we’re not an easily digestible copy of their personality,,, we’re not people if we cant put on a performance for them, theyre like toddlers and need constant entertainment and reminders that we’re human through performative displays of relatability if we want them to stop oppressing us, and 2. most of us are disabled/ill in ways that make us unfortunately vulnerable, its hard to protect or advocate for ourselves sometimes, and 9 times out of 10 now speaking up anywhere causes intense unregulated social consequences bc we arent taken seriously and none of yall are willing to drop the clown act and risk being labelled ‘cringe’ for supporting us. so tbh, if you wanna be Real allies im begging you to actually start ‘cancelling’ ableists. you’re fully capable of it and showcase this all the time, so no excuses. cancel them into dust. if you care and dont wanna just lie to yourself about that, you need to disallow ableists in your space, try to give ableists in power consequences for it, stop Laughing At Ableism, and be ready to listen to us tell you why something is harmful even when it makes your privileged ass uncomfortable or confused. ill gladly explain it to you till you get it. first lesson! you wont get it bc ur not us. get over that and respect us anyways. make the easy benign changes in your life when we request it bc you have that power over us and we’re asking for to make it easier on us to exist. dont question it bc its not your question to ask. and if ur wondering why that should be your responsibility (even tho u dont wonder that with other minorities), u owe us that much letting us rot in asylums our entire lives for decades being experimented on and abused to death with eugenics , omg thankskskskskxkxkxk XOXO ! <3
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shinjaeha · 4 years ago
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itsay ep 3 (thoughts + spoilers)
itsay ep 3 fucking obliterated me so here i am with some more thoughts on this episode (drama) in general. this is just me being an incoherent mess bc my mind is basically just one long !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! after having watched this (once raw and again subbed). this isn’t an analysis, it’s literally me just gushing over the ep as i watch it bc boy oh BOY.
WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT EVERYTHING HITTING DIFFERENT AFTER THE BOAT SCENE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! if i thought the tension in the boat knocked the breath out of me, this whole ep was that x10000.
they really started us off with a bang having continued straight off from last ep with teh smelling oh-aew’s hair, huh?? teh rubbing his face with the coconut paralleled with oh-aew smelling his coconut scented shampoo?? excuse me as i cry into my hands.
teh wasn’t willing to wake up early for tarn when she wanted to draw early in the morning, but when he sees that oh-aew wants to wake up early to study, HE’S the one that makes sure that oh-aew wakes up (and he stays up to keep oh-aew company, even if it’s just over the phone). then again when they’re at the resort...love that tarn realises that too. boy ain’t subtle. also, how is it even possible that they can have that much tension just speaking over the phone?? they’re not even in the same room and the tension between the two of them is so thick i can barely breathe.
the “let me know when you’re home”!!!!!!!!!!!!! BOYFRIEND BEHAVIOUR. as soon as oh-aew asked teh why he always asked tarn that, i KNEW they were gonna put that in there for him and oh-aew and i’m glad i wasn’t disappointed :))) the look on oh-aew’s face when he saw the text!!!!!!!!!!! the way he stopped in his tracks!!!!!!!!!
i already had a feeling that oh-aew was going to be the first one to properly realise and accept his feelings for teh based on the teasers (makes sense since he already knows he likes boys...he’s more sure of his sexuality, which would of course make it easier for him to accept based on that). seeing the way he used the ‘if you get close to him and he doesn’t move away it means he likes you’ theory that teh initially told him to try on bas with teh too was really cute. and the jealousy over tarn. i LOVED that we got to see a more petty side to him when he announced he was going to room with bas partly bc of how lowkey jealous/mad he was about teh and tarn talking over the phone. it left teh so unsettled and confused (the piano music was PERFECT in that scene), and is 510% something teh would have done too (based on the previous two eps). they really are a perfect match huh. but poor bas being caught in the middle of the two of them ;;;
i liked that a lot of this ep was from oh-aew’s perspective. i feel like we got mostly teh’s pov in the first two eps, so it was really nice to see things from oh-aew’s pov too. gave us all more insight into his personality and he’s honestly SO MUCH more flirty than i thought he was going to be omg. the potato chip scene where he just crawled over to teh and ate that potato chip all the while staring straight at teh, then lying on his lap?????????? teh was (understandably) flustered after that AND SO WAS I. i was not expecting that whatsoever. i was also really impressed with how honest oh-aew was about his feelings. i love that he’s stayed true to their previous heart to heart in the boat scene last ep where he basically told teh that he wanted transparency between the two of them. he’s sticking to that, and i admire him so much for being able to be that vulnerable and true to himself. i thought there might have been more confusion with bas, but it looks like as soon as he realised his feelings might have faded/that he was feeling things for teh now, he just went with it. i know in my last text post i said that oh-aew is usually the more cautious/pragmatic of the two, but i feel like when it comes to his feelings, he seems to be really in tune with who and what he wants (more so than teh). this of course makes sense bc he’s likely had more time to come to terms with his sexuality...which is what teh’s figuring out for himself now. on top of that, oh-aew’s feelings for teh are a lot stronger than the ones he has for bas. and since he’s also more certain that teh likes him back, he’s so much bolder in how he approaches teh. and teh, to his credit, returns that honesty too when oh-aew basically pushes him into acknowledging that there’s ~something between them (hammock scene). i was kind of expecting him to push away from that/deny it, but he didn’t. he’s obviously just a lot more confused with his feelings and still needs some time to understand them and process them fully. on a related note, hammock scene was so loaded and SO well acted by the both of them. the fact that they can move from playful in one scene too achingly intense in another always throws me for a loop.
another thing i really love about the two of them is how they push one another to be better. it’s that rivalry that makes their bond even stronger, but it’s also something that worries me for future eps ngl...
but i honestly feel SO BAD for bas...clearly, he likes oh-aew, and although oh-aew was initially confused with the two of them, he’s definitely more convinced when it comes to his feelings for teh. but when bas essentially asked oh-aew out, and oh-aew said let’s invite the rest of they guys?? he looked so sad and my heart kind of broke a little. it’s like watching the poor second lead in a kdrama. and tarn too :( i really hope that when teh accepts his feelings for oh-aew, he doesn’t keep her hanging on the way that most BLs tend to do. she deserves so much better than that. my heart really hurts for the both of them, but at the same time teh and oh-aew are just magnets being pulled together at this point. they can’t stay away from each other.
the scene where teh rubs the smell of oh-aew’s coconut scented pen (from what he’s written) all over his face bc he’s at his limit and can’t stand all those pent up feelings anymore, only to race out to their special meeting place on the beach????? the moment he sees that oh-aew’s there too and he chases after him entranced (and the smile on oh-aew’s face)????? the way the instrumental ost just swells the moment they see each other????? the way they tease and dance around another yet again?????  PURE ART. A CINEMATIC MASTERPIECE. THIS IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL DRAMA I HAVE EVER SEEN. this whole sequence has to be my fave scene in this ep. god, that part where the camera closes in on them and they’re face to face before oh-aew steps away again had my heart trying to flutter its way out of my CHEST. THEY HAVEN’T EVEN KISSED IN THE SERIES YET AND THEY CAN REDUCE ME TO THIS. honestly, their power is something else. the fact that they can stir so many emotions in all of us just by the way they glance at one another, by the way they dart around one another barely touching...there are dramas/movies with multiple kiss/love scenes that can’t even create that tension and longing. it’s the kind of chemistry that burns you inside out. it’s so palpable.
the thigh massage scene had me CAPTIVATED (like all their scenes tbh) and then teh’s mum came to wake me (and the both of them) up haha. but for real, there’s just something so tentative about what’s happening. these feelings are new to them, and they’re easing their way into it. always toeing the line, but not overstepping it yet. it’s primal. they keep letting those feelings build up more and more and more. and you can always feel the way it’s leading to something else. and of course it leads into the next scene where teh’s tutoring oh-aew again but the atmosphere is so incredibly heavy, so tight, that they can’t contain it anymore (i mean, the fact that they contained it for so long when they’re teenage boys with feelings for one another is already astounding enough to me). teh tries so hard, but then the back scratch happens and...THIS ICONIC SCENE...i thought they were going to kiss then (before oh-aew turned around), but then we got something else entirely and the intimacy of it all. just wow. literally not a single kiss and it was one of the most sensual scenes i have ever seen in a BL. it’s just the way they get so caught up in one another. THE YEARNING OF IT ALL. this whole ep was just pure anticipation, and i have never ever wanted two characters to kiss more than i do these two. it’s the build up that gets me (idk if this can be considered slow build since there’s only been like three eps but it sure as hell feels like it!!!!!!!!!). then teh pulls away and it’s like a smack in the gut...but at the same time, i get it. he’s not ready yet. there’s so much for him to take in and he’s not there yet (not the way oh-aew is), and just like oh-aew, it keeps us all hanging on, so close but not quite there yet.
so much of this felt like this cat and mouse game between the both of them where one of them would advance, then retract...it makes the tension between the two of them even MORE overwhelming bc you keep anticipating something, and you get fleeting moments of it, but then it’s over by the time you blink. they keep toying with one another, but not crossing the line YET bc they know that that’ll change everything the moment they do. it’s such a testament to the writing AND the acting bc it’s the chemistry that bkpp have with one another that creates all of that push and pull dynamic, that yearning and desire. having to wait a whole week again is just devastating...i think next ep seems like it might be the climax?? i’m pretty sure it’ll be the ep where teh accepts his feelings (or at least won’t be able to hold himself back physically anymore), where all the build up finally properly erupts, but at the same time, i just know that the angst is going to start piling up and idk how to feel other than terrified bc i’m way too invested now tbh.
anyway, this drama is absolutely magnificent, and all i want to do is rave about how damn good it is. so high quality. it feels so fresh, like they’re reinvented the tried and true coming of age tale in a way, and we’re all just along for the ride. it transcends the typical thai BL story (and i now understand why they were hesitant to label this as BL when it really feels like it encompasses so much more than the usual BL tropes and story). one of my fave dramas of the year by far (BL or otherwise). it’s just a class apart from any drama i’ve watched before and ticks every single box for me. stunning in every way. down to every detail and every feeling and emotion. it’s so raw and real and i can’t praise what nadao and the team have done with this enough (and we still have 2 more eps to go!!). there’s just so much meaning in every little thing, and in all those little things you can see the time and care it’s taken them to make this.
#wait have i talked about the ost and how they use music and silence in this bc it's brilliant!! perfection!!#i told sunset about you#itsay#bkpp#text#oh and not to mention the chinese lyrics being translated to thai STUNNING#nothing else can compare to how this series makes me feel i could write essays upon essays of my thoughts and it wouldn't be enough#it's the headiness of the two of them that has taken my apart in every way#this has felt like the longest week ever and this next week is going to feel even LONGER until the day i get a new ep once again#i think i prob have more things i want to say but i can't think of anything else off the top of my head i just needed to rant somewhere#normally i would just leave my thoughts and feelings in the tags but this is just too much the way the both of them overwhelm us all#you KNOW i'm gonna rewatch this again bc i can't help myself i really can't#i have a couple feelings on how the end could go and it absolutely worries everything inside of me bc there's A LOT of foreshadowing#going around and it's just got me feeling :///#climax next week (i'm pretty sure it'll be next week) is gonna feel like a volcanic explosion after all this waiting#i can't wait till we get the other teaser and i know what's happening in the next ep preview one too#we're getting the infamous neck kiss in ep 4 and it's gonna scrape out my insides just you fucking watch#i will sob until there is nothing left of me#didn't billkin describe the neck kiss as just the sauce???????? fuck i'm not ready I'M NOT READY#the way this is the only thing i want to talk about for days months years decades#the feel of it def reminds me of cmbyn and yeah i totally see it#it's the authenticity of it somehow
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