#also for the record I think the earring looks more like a star but it's ambiguously shaped enough that this works ty ty

[alltimefail]

Time we bring traditional values back, imo. Teach RESPECT and HONOR to this young generation smh...

1 like = 1 amen 🙏🙌

[prkhaven]

MOVIE STAR -s.jy-

Your friend’s attractive brother yearns for you? Well then he certainly can earn you

pairing— money struggling!jake x camgirl fem!reader

genre: smut minors do not interact, cam life au, friend’s brother au, p with very minimal plot, p with feelings, slight forbidden love

wc: 10.7k

warnings: kissing, profanity, mention of candy, heeseung cameo

smut warnings: filthy, protected sex, p in v, consented recording, masturbation, teasing, condom left behind, oral (f rec.), horrendously desperate jake, reader thinks jake is inexperienced (surprise he’s not), fingering, messy, wet, overstimulation, dirty talk, praising, usage of nicknames (baby, good girl)

The sugary flavor traced over your lip before voluntarily slipping back into your mouth. Your mouth pursed around the candy, crooking an eyebrow to your friend’s brother who fiddled with his fingers and averted his gaze away from you.

You pushed out the solid sugary candy from your mouth again with a pop before leaning back, tilting your head to the side as a side smile stretched at your face. While you heard him loud and clear the first time, you wanted to hear it again.

“Can you repeat that again Jaeyun?” You called out the foreign name you knew others rarely called him yet noticed his jerked reaction to it making your lips curl up

Jake could feel his cheeks burning up, his hand running up to his nape to fiddle with the back of his hair before poorly laughing. There was no right moment for this no matter how much he wanted there to be.

Either rip it off like a bandaid or don’t do it in the first place. Deep down he should’ve chosen the latter but it was too late to back out.

He licked his lips before diverting his gaze between you and the floor but when he looked back to you, his attention was drawn onto your chest for a split second before ripping his eyes away.

Sucking on the plush of his bottom lip, he awkwardly chuckled out a sigh before slowly lifting his eyes up from the ground. The more his gaze rode up, the tighter his chest caved in itself.

Yet, when you noticed his gaze rising up your legs, you uncrossed them without a word.

Jake gulped harshly, noticing the evident dip sitting right in between your thighs. Forcing his eyes away, he continued up until to your face trying his best to ignore the attributes he’s only seen through a screen every other week.

Unless you’re willing enough to have some mercy on him but he highly doubts that but it wouldn’t kill him to wish for that.

Your stained lips from the candy you were sucking on made him freeze, admiring how the shade matched you well. He was looking longer than anticipated and didn’t knock out the daze until you cleared your throat.

He sucked in a breath before looking into your eyes. Amusement was the first thing he noticed in your eyes but hidden underneath was something indescribable.

You smiled warmly at him suddenly causing his palms to sweat and clamped together as he discreetly tried to wipe them off with his pants. “Uh well you see, I don’t necessarily make the best pay in the world right now…”

You snort softly nodding your head, “So I’ve heard”

His eyebrows knit together in pure confusion and a slight of horror. You lightly chuckled pointing at your ear with the candy at hand, “You’re not exactly quiet when gaming”

His face grew hotter at the realization that you must hear him every time you come over. Unable to maintain the eye contact any longer, he looks away to close his eyes, hoping that if he denies the moment from happening it’ll seize to exist.

“So what about your money problem?” Jake lifted his hand to rub his sleeved arm in comfort when you circled back to the topic

“Now you see…” His voice strained trying to articulate the proper wording to form a sentence that wouldn’t come off so straight forward but enough to get his point across while also keeping himself sane which he knew was impossible whenever you were near

“You know my sister doesn’t really make the most money in the world either” The mention of your friend made you raise an eyebrow before motioning him to continue, “And there’s only so much that she can give-“

“You mean what I give?” You empathized the I in your sentence with a raised eyebrow

He tensed up, shouldering hunching up at your stern tone before slowly dropping them, afraid that any drastic movement will lead to his demise.

Nervously nibbling at his bottom lip, his fingers danced onto each other as he stared to the floor, “You’re a smart boy“ You stopped mid sentence, “Look at me Jake”

Your heavy sigh instantly gained his attention. While he’s not used to his name having such an effect on him. Oddly enough his body grows hotter the more he’s in your presence—regardless of you being his sister’s friend.

Your eyes roamed his face and neck, the smoothness and evident unblemished of it made your heart jump, “There you go” You smiled softly when he finally looked at you

He licked his bottom lip at the moment of silence, taking in the sight of your smile, “Like I was saying, you’re smart”

“You just need some confidence” You shrugged your shoulders, leaning back in the chair, your legs crossing over each other again as you rested your elbow on your propped up knee

Jake, unable to move his eyes off of you going into the exact spot that he found you not even 10 minutes ago. His interlaced fingers soon slipped out of each other, his shoulders pushed back to have his chest pump out.

You smirked at his now weak confident stance finding him cute, “Now go ahead and ask me the question” You wiggled your candy towards him

“Can I be a part of…” He took a gulp to wash away the nerves forming, “A video with you?”

Moving your head straight, your tongue lolled out to rest the sugary flavor on top of your taste buds before fully popping the candy back into your mouth and closing it shut.

Standing up from the chair you were in, you landed on your feet, dusting off your clothes. With each move you took, Jake watched you.

He shook his head to remain his eyes on the prize but the thought began to blur. “Found out that I do commission for those starring in?” You asked in a sultry way, your words melting his heart

He hastily nodded his head, unable to trust himself to say a word without embarrassing himself. His heart hammered against his chest when you took a step closer to him. You free hand motioned for him to step closer and instantly without a thought he took a stride closer to you.

Making sure he could hear you clearly, you sucked loudly on the candy humming in pleasure at the flavor on your tongue.

Jake peered at you, he saw your eyes closed and the sweet candy in between your lips sending goosebumps across his skin at the lewd sound before a familiar pop followed closely after.

Opening your eyes and looking ahead of you, your hand raised to his shoulder as he silently hissed upon contact causing a closed lip smile to rest upon your face.

You lightly pat his shoulder, “Sorry Jakey” The new nickname flipped his heart ignoring the clear rejection, only focusing on how you never strayed away from calling him by the name no one uses, “I don’t fuck virgins”

Then his heart sank to the pit of his stomach.

[◉¯]

Jake stared at himself in the fogged up bathroom mirror. Rubbing his hand over the glass to clear enough to somewhat properly see himself through the haze.

Pulling away his hovering hand, he pushed back his dripping hair, “Do I really look like a virgin?” He mumbled to himself before dragging his hand down his face in a loud groan

Ever since he heard your words, it’s played through his mind like a broken record. Everytime he vividly remembered the encounter, how your colorful lips uttered the words that crashed his world instantly.

There was the quiet ringing in his ears mellowing out the music playing in the background. He shook his head harshly to rid of the clutter in his head..

Bits of water flung around the bathroom as he roughly shook his head. He reached over to skip to the next song but stopped when a familiar notification popped up on his phone.

Nearly slipping at the water pooling at his feet, he grabbed the phone as his wet fingers hastily rushed to tap at the notification. However, his phone clicked on every other notification besides the one he wanted.

“Open!” He yelled not wanting to miss your live anymore than what he already has

A sigh of relief left him when he was finally redirected and your sweet smile coming into view. He could feel his heart pump out of his chest when your legs came into frame and pressed at your chest as you wrapped your arms at your knee.

He saw your eyes flickering around, presumably watching the comments, the endless high donations coming in from the moment you started the live and your viewer count growing by the second.

You softly giggle and a fluttering erupted in his chest until he felt his stomach fold in itself as one of your legs fell to the side. Your index and middle finger chased after each other slowly up your still perched leg to your knee.

The eyes that were once filled with wonder and faked innocence disappeared. You traced your knee in a slow manner before pushing your leg down to match the other side.

Jake gulped down the lump in his throat, unable to take his eyes off you. Grumbling under his breath in frustration seeing how the live comment section bursted. All those mindless praises flared something nasty in him.

He clicked to put it out of sight, only wishing to focus on you. Your hand helped stretch your neck, moving it side to side to release the supposed tension in it. You moaned in relief that quickly shot right to in between his legs.

Hearing it through his phone speakers and in real life was incomparable. No matter how good the sound system could be. Nothing could top hearing you in person.

As he stared at the screen, Jake’s eyes traveled down to the evident damping on your panties on full display. He pressed his lips tightly together as your hand dragged down from your neck down your body, passing through—stopping for a second at your chest, fingerings gliding over the material of your shirt. Your nipples harden through the tight material and his mouth salivated at the sight.

Was he insane for wondering how they would feel in his mouth? He can live with being known as insane when it comes to you.

Shaking the thought away not wanting to waste his time on that thought when you were right on his screen. Your hands continued down your body.

“Fuck” He muttered lowly when you teased the elastic band of your undergarment clinging to your body

A soft smile graced your face, bringing your legs together again before turning to the side as you hooked your fingers under and tugged at the material.

Pulling it to the side as much as you could before letting go to slap at your side making you yelp in surprise. You looked at the screen before shyly looking away to continue playing with your underwear until your finger slipped underneath again.

You peered over your shoulder to look at the camera, teasingly pulling down your panties off your covering mound. Jake who watched all of this felt his heart racing and then stopping once your panties passed your knees.

You raise your leg slightly up to have the piece of fabric hang from your ankle until you kick it off completely. And in a glory far too great for him, your wet glistening folds stared right at him.

His face dropped to appreciation the gift you granted him of such a sight bestowed upon his phone at full screen.

Your fingers inched closer to your throbbing swollen clit that begged for attention. Gracefully, you moaned the moment your finger grazed over it, head thrown out of frame.

Jake inhaled sharply, looking down from the screen for a second to see his hand wrapped about his throbbing hard on. He jerked back in surprise, just how that happened without him realizing.

Still, his attention span fell through when he heard the wet splotch erupt from his phone speaker and immediately brought his care back to you.

Left to watch you tap against your soaked self before stroking up before stroking down, spreading your folds apart to see your spasming hole.

You jerked away from your fingers rubbing against your clit until you slid a finger between. Jake watched how your finger slipped through and disappeared inside of you.

You let out a loud sigh as your body rested as you dragged your single out just a little before slipping it back in. But, after two strokes, you slipped another finger making you gasp, “So good” You breathlessly whined

Your two fingers pumped out just before your hole could flutter around nothing, you slipped them back in and through your moan, the squelch of your arousal mixing together with the collision of your hand made his head heavy.

The hand wrapped around his shaft tightened harder mimicking how you clamped around your fingers.

“W-wait” You wailed out yet your actions contrasted your plea

The whines bounced off the walls of the bathroom as you now rapidly thrusated your two fingers as far as you could inside of you. Your palm moving up and down against your clit every.

Jake felt excitement coursing through his body. While he knew he shouldn’t be watching you since you were his sister’s friend but that was the least of his concerns. Watching how you mindlessly thrust your fingers into you whilst rubbing at yourself, it was heaven.

Instinctively, Jake’s hand rose up to his tip before dragging back down to the base to match your pace. Holding tighter at his cock, his fingers ran over his slit, the leaking precum rubbed all around his tip. He loudly gasped, stumbling over his feet as he hobbled to the sink—both hands occupied until he threw his phone to the counter.

The hand holding the heft, he thrusted up into his first at your pace and lewd sound. Your strategic pitiful moans and hole taking two fingers made him snicker. “Put one more” His voice strained as his ears filled with the wet sounds of your hand rubbing harshly against your pussy

Knowing his request on the other side of the phone wouldn’t be answered, he closed his eyes shut to let his mind run wild. In his mind, you were wrapped around him instead of his hand, that it was your gummy walls tightening around him.

That those pornogrpahic but symphonic whines and moans were caused by him. He snapped his hips fasted into his hand, the sound of his precum leaking down his shaft fitted perfectly with yours.

“A little more” He whined, sweat trickling down his cleaned body as a familiar twist formed at his lower stomach, “C’mon you can take it- more!”

The humidity in the bathroom made the light headedness worse, his head lolling to the side as his jaw fell slack, succumbing to the pleasure of your sound.

The steamed room still has not fully dissipated and baring his eyes open just enough through his heavy eyelids, he saw the now three fingers stuffed inside of you—stretching you out beautifully.

Your free hand topped your laying one and helped guide your tired movements faster. “I’m gonna- I’m so close!” You blabbed as your legs clamped together as you chase your high

Yet, even though your core was out of sight, covered by your legs, your sound remained, growing louder by the second.

Jake fisted his hand even harder chasing the high, his knuckles burning at the cold tile rubbing against it but that thought flew to the back of his mind.

Tighter.

Resting his palm onto the counter to stabilize himself, he rammed himself in between his tight fisted hand as he let out his own growing moans until he came to an abrupt stop. Fingers wrapped around his tip as ropes of his cum shot out.

A loud noise erupted from his chest as he squeezed his eyes shut, his ears ringing from his orgasm; however, through the muffled silence of his heavy breath your loud whines ripped him back into his hazy mind.

Uncontrollably, his hips buck to the sound. His lips quivered as he tried to stop himself from moving anymore, far too sensitive to push himself even more but his body had a mind of its own.

Weakly peering open his eyes, he watched as you clenched around your fingers, painting them in your arousal.

“S-shit” Jake pitifully mumbled as his vacant hand wrapped around his other as he rutted back into his fist

His cock slipped in and out easier from his accumulated release. The blood flew from his head straight to his cock. He knew he had to stop but he just couldn’t.

As you slowly pulled out your fingers from your hole, it gaped with nothing to fill it. Your arousal smeared pussy glistened, making his cock jerk.

Trashing his body to pull away at the sensation, bits of saliva slipped down the side of his mouth to his chin as his hips kept dragging his still hard on out through his hand

The makeshift cage around him would have to suffice, “Fuck!” He painfully wailed as his second orgasm washed over him

As the white streaks shot out, his weak thrust came to a stop until clear excess spurt out. His chest heaved as he attempted to regain his breath. His hands loosening around himself, his eyes fluttering as he felt sticky all around.

The fog in the bathroom mimicked the one in his brain as he tried to stabilize himself on his wobbling legs. Shifting in between his feet as his other hand stayed to keep him from toppling over, he landed on his elbow.

His head hung low seeing the towel once wrapped around his waist discarded onto the messy floor. He closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh when he leaned forward to rest his head into the crack between his bicep and forearm.

Shaking his head and gulping the dryness away from his mouth, he coughed loudly and straightened himself as he turned on the sink and rid the evidence of what he’s done.

Scrapping in between the cracks of his fingers with soap, he ran his hands under the striking cold water until his hands were clean. He made a makeshift cup to fill and splash his face with the cold water.

Turning off the faucet, he shook his head and went to grab his phone to exit out of your now ending streaming. You waved goodbye to the camera with a warm smile like nothing had happened.

Jake’s finger hovered over the clear X in the corner to leave but his attention remained on shimmering self unable to click out until you ended it yourself.

Sighing heavily, he moved his finger away but a few droplets managed to land on his screen. Jake freezes and his phone nearly slips through his hand as he looks at his screen in horror.

His recent paycheck is now gone.

Your smile now brightened as you laughed lightly, looking directly in the camera. “Thank you for the donation… Dikeu”

[◉¯]

“Do you see him?” Your friend’s voice anxious as she stood beside you

You’ve been trying to see who your friend has been trying to point out for the past 5 minutes through the crowds of people.

You shake your head which made a frustrated noise coming from her as she pulled your arm, her hands at the side of you head as she guided your eyesight.

”Hey!” You started but when the familiar fluff of hair came into view, you had to hold back the rising corner of your mouth to keep still

“I see your brother” Jake who enthusiastically ran his mouth, his plump bottom lip jutting out when he said certain words

“No!” Your friend frustratedly sighed, moving your head further towards the one talking to her brother

“Oh you mean Heeseung?” You pulled your head from her hands but shifted your gaze from the said male back to Jake, who you’d rather focus on

You could feel the questioning gaze from your friend, “Got the hots for him or something?” You looked away and faced your friend who shied away and remained silent at your question

Letting out a small chuckle at the lack of response, you patted your friend’s shoulder making her look at you. “No need to worry, let me handle this” You smiled before walking towards the two males

Your friend quietly shouted your name—wanting to avoid drawing attention to the situation but you were already too far ahead that she sighed heavily and messed around with her outfit to deal with the growing nerves.

“Heeseung I’m going to be a deadbeat before I could even say I’ve lived life!” Jake frustratedly pushed back his hair, “I’m going to go out a celibate” He painfully chuckled as he dragged his hand down the side of his face

“Celibate is by choice” Heeseung laughed at his friend but Jake brushed him off

“Might as well be by choice at this point” Jake huffed crossing his arms over his chest

“Well it could be worse Jake, you could be going out a virgin”

Jake popped his arms out in a loud sigh, “I don’t even know how I’m functioning right now”

“This is the longest I’ve gone without fucking”

Jake started rambling but his friend tried to stop him but to no avail, he only continued, “I should’ve stayed a virgin if I knew it’d be impossible to get laid when you’re broke”

Even though he felt a tug at his arm, he pulled his arm away and roughly shook his head at his friend, “What? I’m telling the truth. No one is caring enough to pay attention to me when I don’t have a dollar to my name, let alone fuck me”

But before he could continue he froze when the familiar pitch of your voice came from behind, “Jake?”

Maybe it was his mind playing a trick on him but when he heard Heeseung say your name his heart dropped to the pit of his stomach as he realized he was foolish for even thinking you weren’t real.

Jake’s shoulders deteriorated into a slouch and his mouth fell open when he faced you.

“Sorry don’t mind me but I really need Jake right now” Before Jake had any chance to say anything, your hand wrapped at his bicep before tugging him to follow you

Not saying another word, Jake aimlessly followed you as he peered behind to see Heeseung staring right back at him in amusement, “Need you to focus here dikeu”

At the new nickname, he felt his body become rigid, his finger on his mouth to hush you, “Shh! People will hear you” His eyes flickered around to see the few peering eyes towards your general direction before managing to escape them outside

Your kind smiled dropped the moment you turned around to face him and let go of his arm, “So you are dikeu” Your arms crossed over one another, you thought it was a crazy coincidence but you didn’t actually think it was him

Jake froze upon the realization of what he let slip out. His hand flew over his mouth and his eyes nearly popped out of its socket as he screamed into his palm.

You jumped at the sudden burst of emotions, “Shh, this time people will actually hear us” Your hands moved up and down to quiet down his frantic self

Jake released the hand over his mouth to brush his hair out of his face with a shudder of his breath. This time he silently let out a groan as his eyes looked to the floor, unable to face you.

“Well I thought you heard of me because of your sister” When you spoke, Jake tried to keep himself from running in the opposite direction, “Not because you were subscribed”

Suddenly without fail, Jake’s knees gave out on him, he crouched to the floor, his caged in between his shoulders as his head hung low. His cheeks burned under his skin, the stretch of his finger playing with his nape but stopped when your hands pulled them away.

Lifting his head up to see you looking at him, your smile shining and radiating ease matching the soft rubs of your thumb against his burning skin.

“Is it true that you’re not a virgin?” When you asked the forward question, he flinched but not enough to pull away

His mouth screwed shut as his mind raced trying to find the words for a proper sentence. Harshly licking his drying lips, he looked to the floor.

Sighing softly, you called out his name to garner his attention, “Jake” The stern yet soft tone nearly had his heart ready to burst

“I’m not” His voice was quiet like a whisper that he would’ve missed it if he wasn’t already hyper aware of you

You bit on your tongue to hold back your grin. Tugging his hands to land on your lap making his gaze flicker from his hands on your lap and your mischievous filled eyes.

“You know I don’t have your number” You lowly hummed tilting your head to the side just a little, “You’ll give it to me, won’t you Jakey?”

Jake’s knees fully gave up on him only leaving him to land right on them. The words got caught in his throat so with the only option to aimlessly nod his head and for the first time, he saw your smile. A genuine smile.

[◉¯]

Groggily rubbing your eyes as a yawn slipped past as you scrolled through donations collecting your bargain for the week.

The high amount of numbers clicking into your bank a ccount until you stumbled upon the infamous username. A relatively high price paid towards you which you knew full well had just been recently added to his bank account before forfeiting to you.

Just what is dikeu doing? Your curiosity got the best of you as you decided to scroll through your account, a bigger wonder if there were any other traces of Jake left behind that you might’ve missed

Scanning through everything imaginable, it came up empty with the exception with the one recent donation. You huffed loudly as you leaned back, your arms folding over your chest.

Staring at the screen in front of you, you glanced at your phone before hastily grabbing it.

Supposed to be trying to sleep early in hopes of stopping himself from dwelling anymore on you and your sweet voice, enticing demeanor that dragged him right into your world.

However, his eyes shot open when his phone rang and his screen lit up in his dark room. Squirming his face into his pillow he heavily puffed before grabbing his phone and zeroing in on the notification.

Yet, when he did, he nearly fell off his bed when your name in bold letters with a small smile alongside it appeared. Scrambling to sit up as his fingers fumbled between the green and red button.

Pressing down on a random button, hoping that it was the one he deep down desperately wanted. He brought his phone to his ear and with a shaky voice when he heard the call go through,

“Hello?”

“I was starting to think you gave me a fake number there Jakey” Your voice from the speaker sounded clearer than anything he has ever heard before

He loudly coughed shaking his head knowing full well you couldn’t see him, “I’d be the biggest idiot if I did”

“But how come you called? You could’ve easily sent a text to check” Jake awkwardly squeaked out, his voice of pitch higher than usual making him cringe

He cleared his throat, shifting in his own bed as he waited for your response.

“Don’t know” You lowly hummed staring at your ceiling with a soft smile hearing his shuddering breaths, “Maybe just wanted to make sure that it was you”

As the silence grew more, you peered over to your computer, dikeu’s account opened and public for anyone to see that he only followed one creator on the whole app—you.

“Can I ask you something real quick?” Jake froze on his spot, his heart racing as he nervously fiddled with the collar of his shirt

“Yeah of course” His voice was soft and mellow, contrasting how he was during the beginning of the call

You smiled at his almost immediate response as you turned your body over to lay on your front. You sucked your bottom lip into an even wider smile, “Well as a clear subscriber for…” You squinted at the screen, “8 months, what concept or should I say video, is your favorite?”

Jake nearly sent himself off his bed again, the air caught in his throat. He patted his chest roughly, pulling his phone from his ear to see the call minutes going up by the second of his lack of response.

He could hear you faintly call out his name as he rushed to bring the device back to shell of his ear, “I’m here sorry”

“I was just not expecting that”

“What were you expecting?” He could feel your question gaze through the line

“I don’t know, maybe how was your day?” The tone of voice raised higher at the end of his sentence

Your laughter filled his ears prompting his own awkward one mixed with yours.

Instead of focusing on the answer right away, his fingers rubbed over Adam's apple while loudly clearing his throat to answer you, “I uh like-”

Jake took a moment and closed his eyes, he covered his face in embarrassment before going on. “I like the point of view one…” He quietly admits and your grin grows

“Oh really, why? Like imagining that it’s you?” Your slurred speech ran down to his body as he could feel his body instantly react to you

He stayed quiet for a second trying to rack his brain for something to say but it wasn’t quick enough for you, “Don’t leave me hanging, tell me what you like about it so much?”

His heart nearly jumped out his chest, he pulled his phone away as he silently screamed kicking his feet in the air before lighting patting his cheek to knock the senses back into him.

Clearing his throat, he adjusted himself to portray confidence because you can fake it until you make it, “Not even that, I just love how it focuses only on you”

You blinked at his unexpected response, you slightly perched yourself up from your bed. ”Is that so?” You gulped trying to regain your altered composure

“So you must hate it when there’s someone else in my videos” You slightly teased but he cut you off with a more factual information

“Well not really. You’ve only ever posted with two other people on your account. Everything else is just you” He corrected your previous statement and you pulled your phone to look at your screen

You brought your phone back to your ear in a hum, “Stalker much”

“I prefer the word observant actually” He chuckled unsure of where the sudden confidence came from but gripped it tightly not willing to let it go so easily,

“So then Mr. Observant, how would you like a hands-on experience? It’s better to witness it in person rather than watch through a screen” Expecting Jake to shy away from your shameless attempt

You didn’t expect for him to run head first into it.

“How does tomorrow night sound for you?”

Your wide smile unable to be contain anymore as you reply, “Sounds perfect”

[◉¯]

Jake was confident in his ability to please people, even if it’s been a while since he’s gotten together with someone. Yet, he’s so nervous around you.

His leg bounced up and down, unable to get rid of the jitters by screaming or moving around; he had to opt for a more discreet approach which failed either way.

“Damn you’re on the edge of the bed” You pointed out in a laugh, “It looks like you’re about to fall off”

“Sorry” Jake unconsciously apologized keeping his eyes trained to the floor instead of you

Hands on your waist as you focused on him. Shamelessly checking him out and the outfit he was wearing. You were finding it hard to believe that he wasn’t a virgin.

The white long sleeves that neatly cuffed past his wrist, a navy blue t-shirt with letterings you didn’t bother to pay attention to and light khaki baggy pants that suited him perfectly jumping up and down with each shake.

Your fingers ran over your lip with a laugh as you lightly shook your head, “Are you okay Jake?”

He slightly jumped at the sound of your voice growing nearer and he flickered his eyes around as you quickly nodded his head, shooting a thumbs up your way.

Both of you cringed at his antics, him finding it embarrassing while you found it endearing.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” You tilted your head to the side, “I can just give you the money, free of charge”

Turning your body to rummage through your desk cabinets as you searched the packs of envelopes that held your emergency money in but froze when two arms landed on each side of you.

Your shoulders tensed up making you appear smaller the moment his breath tickling against your ear, “No. Let me earn it”

“Please”

You blinked as you twisted your head to see a fiery look in his eyes as he stared into your eyes. The previous look he once had disappeared into nothing as his plump lips hesitantly planted a kiss to the side of your head.

He pulled away for a second to take in your reaction but seeing a glint cast over your eyes for a second, he caught himself leaning in again to plant more pecks against your face.

“Jake” He jolted when you called his name so breathlessly but he didn’t stop—or more like he couldn’t

His lips messily parted from your head as he made his way down your face until he reached your jaw. His arms being the only thing keeping him up from toppling over. “What are you doing?” Your words contradicting your actions as you provided more access to your neck

The feel of his plush lips melted into your skin as you felt the faint smirk against it, “Starting to get ahead of ourselves aren’t we?” He nodded his head at your words while he softly sucked on your skin

You heavily breathed out as you slowly turned your body around to properly face him. Immediately his arms wrapped at you as your hands raked up until they reached the fluff of his hair before sliding through them, filling the cracks between your fingers with it.

The wet mouth never left your skin as he pressed kisses everywhere that skin showed. His hands softly digging into your side as he pressed his body against yours, “Hold on- Have to get the camera” You sharply inhaled when he nicked at your skin with his teeth

“Depriving me more of you huh? How cruel” He chuckled slightly pulling away to hover at your side as you rummaged around for your camera

“Let’s just use the phone camera. Makes it feel more natural” He pitched in making your scoff

“Or more amateur” You shot your head at him to see the sheepish grin he had plaster across his mouth

“Then let’s make sure it’s a hella good one” He giggled because making it feel more natural and real reminds you of the circumstances of this moment

This was your friend’s brother yet, you grinned aimlessly nodding your head in agreement. “Want to make your own point of view video?”

“Yeah… But might not be willing to share it with the world. I think I’ll be selfish and keep it for my eyes only” Jake hummed, his eyes flickering between your mouth and eyes, silently pleading for permission

“Kiss me Jake” Without having to be told twice, he captured your mouth with his

Your hands grasped his forearm as his hands shook, cupping your face. Feeling a dizzy sensation filling your mind when his hands retightened at your cheeks. Your hand traced up his arm to grab a fist full of his hair.

Lightly tugging at the fluff of it you giggled in the kiss, “Thought you so desperately needed money”

He chuckled, his mouth detaching and reattaching themselves onto yours, “Being with you is better than getting a penny”

The harsh flutter in your heart after his words made you press harder against his lips to keep him from saying anything more. He noticed your efforts and allowed his hands to roam freely over your back.

His fingers dug deeper into your side causing your mouth to part enough for his tongue to slip in. Your hands gripped his broad shoulders, his head tilting further to the side to deepen the kiss.

“Phone” You muffled into his mouth, a silent roll of his eyes he fished out his phone with one hand while the other remained holding you close

With his eyes still closed putting all the faith into his finger to click the right buttons and start recording. As he could hear the faint ping, he peeked his eyes open to see the red dot flashing with the timer running.

He smirked in the kiss before closing his eyes again, praying you both were in frame.

Your hands grabbed his face to not break the kiss. Your head begins to feel heavy and light at the same time as all the oxygen in your lungs left and mixes with Jake’s.

Your body was pushed back until the back of your knees hit your bed frame and immediately you fell back with Jake topping over you. For a split second, he pulled away to suck in an uneven breath before diving back into your lips.

His arm extended out as he tried to balance the phone whilst focusing on you. Being able to feel the light shake that ran through his body, you softly giggled before forcefully pulling away.

Yet, he couldn’t get enough—he didn’t want it to stop. Jake chased after you, messily pecking at your lips. He babbled something incoherent making you laugh and pushed at his chest to properly break apart.

You heaved with each pant you took as you gulped down a waft of air to even out your breathing. Jake stared at you with a crazed look in his eyes, his tongue running over his swollen lips before breaking out into a fit of giggles.

Quickly matching his energy, you broke out into a weak laugh with him as he landed his head into the crook of your neck. Your hands reach to hold him close.

Your arms snaked around his neck, he flushed his body onto you when he felt the faint shake of your head, he wasn’t sure what it meant but he couldn’t help but laugh at it.

“Prop the phone up. It’ll be better for you” You whispered loud enough for him to ear but he roughly shook his head

“I want to show you off” He murmured lifting his head and carefully leaning down to softly kiss you

You hummed happily when his mouth reattached to yours. The plush of his lips messily pressed softly against yours, the arms at the side of your head crawled into your side, his grip on his phone loosened while he poorly recorded the two of you.

Purposely letting out a louder sigh as your hands moved to his broad back, “Sound so pretty baby” He muttered against your lips before tugging at the bottom out then releasing them with a loud pop

You giggled at the action but your mouth suddenly dropped when he traveled down and planted wet kisses at your check to the shape of your jaw before trailing down to your neck.

The fingers that played with the fabric of his search divulged straight into the follicles of the fluffy hair, tugging at them which only urged the heavy sighs from him.

Turning your head to the side allows more access for Jake to lather himself over your body. With your peered open eyes you catch the discarded phone. You look back to your body whether both of Jake’s hands roamed your body.

Instead of being able to garner his attention, softly pleasurable noises left your swollen lips. You loosened your hold on his hair in an attempt to grab the phone and prop it up enough where you two show but Jake stopped you midway.

He yanked your hand back into his hair. “Let me take care of that” Your eyes widen in shock but your body shifted into a pliant state when you heard those words

Allowing your mind to drift away and appreciate the moment instead of focusing on anything else but Jake

You tilted your head back into the mattress, allowing yourself to get caught up in the way his hand glided across your body until it slid under your shirt.

A faint hiss escaped when the cold rough feel of his hands grazing your skin, his sole attention focused on you, “You’re so pretty. So fucking gorgeous. You’re just the prettiest person I’ve ever seen”

Jake’s voice was heavy but soft, something you hadn’t experienced with other guys before ever. Especially not with the two who showed up in past videos.

Your hands tangled deeper into his hair when you felt a wet stride trail down your stomach.

Suddenly catching your wide eyed gaze at the camera pointed towards you, Jake smirked, his plump lips bit down on the waistband of your pants.

Instinctively, your hands attempted to peel the phone away from his grasp to try and pan it towards him but he stopped you from doing so.

“I already told you, I want it to be on you” He told each trace of his skin on yours left goosebumps in its wake. Your body shakes when he fumbles over your lower body. It was swift and quick that you were left in your undergarments

Jake froze when he caught sight of the cling of your panties to your core, hugging and molding your folds through the thin material. His heart picked up in pace, he felt like he was in cloud 9. He shakily panned the camera over to capture the sight.

However it didn’t last long when his thumb ran over the growing wet patch on your underwear to worsen the damping.

Pushing further between your folds, slightly applying more pressure each time he slid in deeper, he focused on how the material caved inwards, spreading your folds apart.

“Ja-“ You mewled but stopped when his hand slipped from underneath and rubbed away at your flesh

He bit harshly down on his bottom lip to stop the pitched noise to leave his throat when he touched your glistening entrance. It soaked his thumb as he pressed it deeper in while the rest of his fingers pushed away the undergarment to the side.

The camera closed in on your soaked entrance as his fingers rubbed harder igniting soft moans from you. “I got you this wet? Could get used to see you like this” He hummed more for you than the camera before dipping his head to place a soft kiss against you

You jerked away from the plush of his lips instead of on your lips and neck, now on your sensitive folds. Jake smirked and was able to feel the cheesy smile, you lightly smacked the top of his head erupting a giggle out of him.

As he adjusted the camera to capture your wet folds, he stuck out his tongue to take a long stride against you. Your hands flew to his hair as tugging at the strands allowing you to press further into the sheets.

His freehand roamed over your body, tracing at your knee before prying yourself open even more. Scooping all that leaked out of you, he messily slurped your mess.

“So wet” He moaned into your glistening self, his quick nibbles at your making your body wither beneath him

Tugging harder on his hair, your back arched off the bed as the lewds noises filled the room. The shameless slurps, the heavy pants and growing moans as he messily pressed himself deeper in, his nose grinding into your clit.

His tongue flicked up at your folds, the wetness leaking from the corner of his lips and dribbling down to his chin. Jake’s free hand traced under your trumbling thighs, placing them on his shoulders.

Your legs tried to squeeze together for a moment forgetting that he was there but his hand dug into the flesh of your thigh, “Trying to keep me in place baby? Don’t worry I’m not going anywhere”

The deep rumble of his voice ran up your spine and clouded your head. Every calculated glide of his tongue left you dizzy but you yelped a broken moan when a finger slid into your gaping hole.

He was infact not a virgin nor inexperienced, just highly unlikely.

“J-Jake” You squeaked when another finger joined parting your spasming self more

The entire time, Jake never once looked away from you. He watched how your chest rose with each breath you took. Your bottom lip quivers and he smiles at you.

He adjusted the camera to zoom in on where his mouth was attached to you but his grip slipped when your legs caged him against your pussy as you grinded against his face and fingers for more friction.

“Someone is eager” Jake lightly chuckles but simultaneously curled his fingers into your gummy wall, grazing at them causing your eyes to roll back to the back of your head

“D-don’t tease” You huffed but he didn’t listen because he knew you didn’t mean those words, not when your legs hooked him into place as you chased after his mouth

The camera fell from his hand and landed perfectly on a bundled up blanket. Jake didn’t bother to check if it was catching the two of you.

Both his red knuckles and swollen mouth were deep in your pussy. As he pumped into you, his tongue flicked around your folds to gather any spilling wetness. There was no way he could risk losing what you taste like, needing it embedded into his mind forever.

With each curl of fingers, he would extend them out to scissor your fluttering hole open. The rapid kisses at your glistening spread apart folds as he lathered his tongue around, “I’m going to- Please”

“Come for me baby” Jake pushed deeper with his fingers and matched the ruts of your hips against his face

Throwing your head back, a louder moan ripped out of you as you tightly clenched around his fingers. Jake slurped up what you released making sure that he didn’t miss a single drip.

His fingers moved in pace to help you throughout your orgasm making you slightly jerk at the stimulation to which he only said, “Helping you”

He choked on his breath when he was pulled from between your legs and you slammed your lips right onto his. Jake stared at you in shock as he watched your screwed shut eyes while your mouth moved with his in sync.

Your hand tangling in his hair, legs wrapping at his torso to flush his body to flush on top of you, not wanting to let him go. His hand dug harshly into your side, his freehand perking up your leg as teeth clashed together from improper correlation, your tongues meeting another as you kissed each other silly.

His hand tightly grasped at your breast and squeezed it making you whine. You pulled at his hair, the lack of oxygen making you and him dizzy but unable to pull away from each other.

“I need to be inside of you please” Jake pleaded in between kisses as he chased after you when you tried to pull away for even more than a second to respond

“Condoms in my drawer” You panted out when you could’ve, hoping he managed to catch what you said

Yet, instead of freaking out since it’s been a while that he’s actually used one, he didn’t think twice of climbing off to rustle through your drawer and taking out two.

Perching yourself onto your elbow, you raised an eyebrow when you saw two packets between his shining fingers. It must’ve been written on your face because Jake chuckled and pressed a chaste peck to your cheek, “Trust me, we’re going to need ‘em”

The corners of your lips yanked up as you stifled a laugh but your smile quickly faltered when you saw how serious he was. You opened your mouth to question but Jake stood up from your bed and began fumbling with his belt.

Your eyebrows jumped as your eyes flickered down to notice the large bulge poking from within the restraints of his pants. Your mouth dropped when his pants did and he was left in only his boxers.

“W-what?” He asked when he noticed your surprised expression, “Is something wro-“

“You’re huge” You interrupted him as you gawked at his size

You’ve seen some different bulges before but never like this.

The wet patch changed the color of his boxers around his leaking tip making you gulp down the nerves. But those two words were like a switch in Jake’s head.

Something consumed his sense of rationality and sanity and threw it out the window, he took strides straight to you. His mouth twitched into a smile as with each step he took, he tugged his boxers down.

“Don’t worry, you can handle it” He hummed and you watched how a dark cloud filled his eyes

Your mouth opened to respond but when you caught sight of his hung self in all its glory, no restraints holding it back, you closed your mouth.

Your nerves skyrocketed when you heard the plastic ripping sound and you looked back up to see Jake leaning against his arms to whisper into the shell of your ear. “Want to put it on for me baby?”

Tilting your head to the side to see his cheesy grin, you bit on your bottom lip to hold back your gleaming smile. Grabbing the offered plastic and pushing his leaning body away from yours just enough to grab his twitching cock.

Jake whimpered at the tight hold you had around him, your thumb rubbed at the side of his shaft as you watched the precum leak more out of him.

Looking up through your eyelashes, you smirk as you leveled down to his cock. “Wh-Wait!” Jake’s voice strained yet it was too late as you dragged your tongue across his tip, licking him clean of the mess

Jake threw his head back as he moaned when you engulfed his bulbous tip into your mouth. Having to try his absolute best to stop himself from toppling over, he rooted in himself in your bed.

Although, you didn’t say much. Jake did. “O-Oh so good”

“Shit your pretty mouth is perfect to me” You dragged your tongue from the tip down his shaft to the base and you smirked when you felt an even heavier weight

Jake blushed when the next words fell from your full mouth, “You’re heavy Jakey”

His face burned in embarrassment but the pleasure was too good to care anymore. Using everything in his power to stop himself from ramming his cock into your welcoming mouth, he pushed your body back to the bed.

“Turn around” He snatched the condom from your hand in an unwarranted haste and you jerked at his sudden change of demeanor but a gush leaked out of you at the stern tone and hard gaze glaring into your soul

Your body was like fire and Jake was willing to get burned.

In all the times you’ve been around Jake, you had never seen this side of him before. Naturally, you were curious by how much you could poke at him before he snapped.

You knew testing your luck was dangerous considering how he could leave you all hot and bothered. But you remained sprawled on your back, your hands riding up your shirt to expose your skin.

You tilted your head to the side as you saw his jaw clench and his tongue poking the inside of cheek in annoyance. “I said turn around”

But he noticed your continuous lack of obedience, leaving him to sigh loudly and pinch the high nose bridge. The rationality that was already out the window dug a deeper hole followed by his dignity and sense of self as he was consumed by need and desperation.

“Be a good girl baby… Turn around for me” He stopped your treading up shirt and rested his hands at your hips, softly tugging at them to help flip you over

You looked up at him with a slight frown, “Why?”

Knowing better than to try and test Jake even more with the chance that he could leave you like this but you knew the chances were slim.

Jake landed back on his arms leaned down into your ear, his breath fanning over the shell of your ear, “How else would I fuck you nice and open?”

A cold shiver ran up your spine, unable to dwell on the thought any longer. Your body moved on its own onto your knees and below but before you could lay down, Jake stopped you.

“Hands and knees for me” He ran a hand over the middle of your back before trailing down your spinal cord softly grabbing at your hips and tugged you lower half back, “Good girl”

The chilling accented voice only lasted for a second in your head when you were suddenly stretched open as he slid into you. “Shit- So fucking good” He grunted as he pushed himself further into the confinedment you provided to him

Your jaw dropped as your head threw back as your folds pulled apart from each other at the intrusion. “Jake” You mewled his name

Jake dug his fingers deeper into your hip in response, loving the way you called out to him that he needs to hear it forever.

“C’mon baby you can take it” His thumb rubbed at your side to soothe your frantic self with hopes of helping you accommodate to his size that made you feel like you were being split in half

“You can take more than that-“ Jake grunted as he eased his cock more into your spasming hole, “Take a fucking cock in that sweet pussy of yours”

“P-please” You wailed, clawing at your sheets that crumbled underneath your bodies

Jake pressed his hand flat onto your back before snapping his hip drilling his cock to fill you up in one thrust. Your arms nearly gave up on you from the harsh jolt but Jake helped you stay up. Your fist gripped the sheets, making your knuckles turn white as your mouth fell slack.

“Please what?” Jake cooed trying to ignore how you gripped around him

Your mind felt like a jumble, not much thoughts coursing through but there one clear thing in it, “Fuck me please”

Jake smacked his tongue against his teeth into a giggle, “Well who am I to deny you”

He dragged his cock leaving only the tip inside before slamming his hips forward to meet your back. Your arms and legs felt weak and wobbled but the stretch overpowered any other sensations.

Repeating the same motion of his hips, each time filling you up more and more until he was balls deep inside of you.

Your eyes screwed shut when he soon found his pace. A rapid but steady pace that ensured his tip to poke your insides perfectly, teasing at your g-spot with each thrust. “So good for me- Taking me so well”

Your head hung heavy, your shoulders hunched up to your neck as moans slipped past your lips. You felt like you were floating on a cloud, each slam of his cock drilled your forward.

Deep down, if it felt like the roles were reversed, the upper hand you once had over him, flipped into him having the upper hand over you.

“Knew you’d be able to take me so well. Such a good fucking girl” Jake spewed, his hands running over your body before grabbing your sides as he slammed his hips to meet your

The warm wet confinement you provided for him was beyond anything he had ever felt before, it changed something in his mind and he’s sure he would rather lose everything than have to give you up after this.

The lewd sounds of when you and Jake met, his light grunts and strained out noises from each other you bounced off the wall. The supposed video long forgotten as Jake continued to piston his cock in and out of you

”M-More Jake please” You wailed as you body landed forwards, your head landing onto the pillow as you fisted the sheets turning your knuckles white

“You want more? Do you think you can take more?” He laughed but when you were going to respond he answered for you, “Actually, I know you can take more”

“Always saw how you were never truly satisfied” You clenched around him making him chuckle, “Am I right?”

You weakly nodded as a response, not trusting yourself to use words that wouldn’t only come out as a moan. Jake’s hooded eyes gleamed when he saw your action.

Slamming his hips harder against your back, he watched how sweat trickled down the side of your face. Your mouth falling slack when his tip teased at your g-spot, rearranging your insides to mold him.

The stretch of his cock left you delirious and full. In an attempt to push yourself back up on your arms, Jake put a hand on your upper back to hold you in place.

“Jake!” You squealed his name as his thrust soon grew unrhythmic

“C’mon. Fucking take it- Just a little more” Jake grunted when he felt you clamp tighter around him, forbidding him from leaving anymore than an inch out of you

His free hand wrapped at your hip moved across your stomach down until his fingers found the bundle of nerves to circle it. Your wails and moans turned into louder ones when he pinched at your clit to soothe over it before repeating the same process.

“Please! Please!” The weak pleas fell deaf on his ears but filled his mind instantly

“Please what? Talk to me” Jake groaned but was only met with strained silence as replies the more he rubbed down on your bud, “What were you asking for baby?”

Your mind was reeling, you weren’t sure what you were asking for but you just needed more of Jake.

“A-Anything please-Jake, just more of you please” Your slurred words weren’t nearly considered a proper sentence than what you had hoped but Jake easily managed to string them together

Placing his palm onto your clit, timing it perfectly to roughly rub at it with his thrust made you squeal.

“Take it baby. ’m going to fill you up so nicely” Your heart fluttered as any rational thought was long gone

“Please Jakey!” You whined when his thrust became faster

“Come with me please. Please. Please” The weak pleas from him made your stomach flip as the knot in your abdomen snapped

Jake gasped when you tightened as you came on his cock that was covered by the rubber plastic. Even through the material, he could feel each spasm holding his place deeply in you.

Your body shivered when you entered the state of pleasure, your head drifting into an ecstasy you hadn’t felt before. But that didn’t stop Jake.

He needed more—to take you to heights you have never seen before.

“Tightening around me so good baby. Just a little more. Promise” Jake’s erratic pace picked up again and the coil of where you met burned into his mind as he stared unable to look away from the masterpiece that was you

You loudly shudder at the continuing stimulation to your spasming self. Each glide into your slicken entrance was easier and messier. You released accumulated around his protected shaft until it was pushed to the base of his cock with each push.

Jake continued to move his hand over your clit, his thrust growing unrhythmic as his abdomen tightened. You felt the twitch of his cock inside your walls and you knew he was getting closer to his climax.

Consciously, you clamped around him earning a grunt from behind as the sound of skin slapping on skin grew faster, louder and more frequent. Pressing harder down on your bud, rubbing at the wetness making you moan loudly.

And with one deep thrust, he stilled himself buried inside of you. Jake’s ragged pants formed into strained whine and whimpers as his cum filled the condom.

The juts of warmth spurted inside but not painting your velvet walls white of him. Your hand fisted at your sheets as you buried your head deep into your pillow to conceal your shivers.

However, your breath got caught in your throat instead when Jake flushed his chest to your back. His hand hovered your fist to slide underneath to replace your sheets with his hand.

You tightly held his hand when wet splotches landed at your neck to trail under your ear making your shudder “Never doubted you for a second that you couldn’t take me”

You scoff, peering over your shoulder to meet his sparkly eyes staring right at you. Your scoff turned into a weak chuckle as you melted at his thumb rubbing over your hand.

“Take a deep breath for me baby” He softly soothed your side and you followed through

Sucking in a deep breath and shakily letting out a gasp at the foreign feel of emptiness as Jake slid out of you already too accustomed to being filled up by him.

However, instead of feeling completely empty like you anticipated, you felt something heavy still in you.

Jake got off of you only to push you onto your side where you silently hissed at the ache of your body but you looked behind at him to see him grabbing the discarded phone and it clicked in your mind.

“Jake! The recording!” Instead of being in a panic like you, Jake gracefully planted butterfly kisses over the side of your face

“What are you-“ You stopped mid-sentence when he raised your leg and brought the camera’s focus your gripping self

Your mouth drops when you see the left behind condom stowed deep in your pussy. Whipping your head towards him to see his prideful smile as he placed a finger onto your cheek to guide your attention back to the recording screen.

His freehand snaked around your waist to your swollen clit and softly rubbed at it making you whine and him chuckle. You watched as he inched down to where the rubber was still lodged in you until he stuck his fingers into the opening.

Your hand ran to grab his wrist, “S-sensitive” You warned before two of his fingers pushed into the buried condom to open it

The two of you watched through the screen, the seeps of his cum spilling out and landing to the surrounding folds as he messily rubbed over your coated pussy.

“Messy and sticky” Jake tooted his lips together, “What do you say? Do we clean it up or do we make it worse?”

The dark whisper into your ear had your heart hammering out of your chest that you were fearful he would be able to hear how close he was to you.

You gulped down the rising excitement, however it must’ve been written all over your face because Jake was already gleaming before the words, “We do need more content” left your mouth

“Good because I did tell you we were going to need two”

[◉¯]

You: I’ll send you the final product once I’m done editing

You: But I can’t deny that I have a feeling this will do numbers

Jake: Is this you basically inviting me to do another video with you?

You: Possibly

Jake: How about we do a little twist next time?

Jake: Let me hit it raw

You: Not yet

Jake: Aw :(

——

[rafesangelita]

♡ kook!sweetheart!reader walks her first runway for her own lingerie brand, and of course rafe has to have a front row seat.

warnings: rafe being a supportive bf, suggestive ending

a/n: trying a new fic layout, i hope you all like it as much as i do <3 lol i had the hardest time trying to decide on the song i wanted to use for this fic

you couldn’t believe the day was finally here. ever since you started your lingerie line, you wanted to have a runway show to showcase the beautiful pieces, and all thanks to rafe, he was able to make that possible. while your boyfriend insisted on being backstage with you, you told him to wait until you walked out for the finale, wanting to surprise him in full glam and a set you have yet to release. to say you were excited would be an understatement— you were literally having your very own victoria secret show.

with fashion bloggers, magazine editors, and most importantly; rafe, the man who believed in you more than yourself, being in attendance, you just wanted everything to take place smoothly. “oh my god, you look amazing!” you glanced up from the small vanity mirror, meeting kelce’s girlfriend’s gaze. “me?!” your eyes widened as you shot up from your seat. “look at you! kelce is going to lose his mind.” you laughed, admiring the way her makeup sparkled under the studio lights.

“you think so?” she smiled, both of you swallowing nervously when you heard a ‘okay, we’re on in five!’ over one of the staff’s walkie talkie’s. “oh, god, just what i needed to hear.” you joked. she hugged you before joining the rest of the girls in line. outside in the crowd, rafe was already taking pictures like a proud facebook mom, shushing kelce and topper once the lights dimmed and the music started. the intro to britney spear’s ‘gimme more’ began playing, the crowd letting out a series of ‘oooh’s’ and ‘ahhh’s’ when the first model walked out.

rafe was only recording for your sake, his eyes strictly set on his hands as he patiently waited for your entrance. everything that the models were wearing was something he had already seen on you behind closed doors. rafe couldn’t help but feel his chest bloom with pride as he looked around the beautiful venue. despite him paying for everything, you were the one who worked with the planner and coordinator to bring your vision to life.

and what a vision it was.

you had spotlights lining the runway, glitter littering the glossy flooring. various props were also placed on the sidelines. “look, here comes y/n!” rafe arched a brow at his friend, kelce clearing his throat awkwardly. “don’t get too excited, now..” rafe grumbled, eyes locked on your silhouette. the music reached it’s final bridge, your lingerie clad body illuminating the stage. rafe had no words. you were wearing wings like the angel you truly were, the rhinestones and embellishments on your set reflecting under the now multicolored lighting.

“you’re beautiful, babygirl!” rafe shouted, his eyes widening as you got closer. you looked ethereal. not one hair was out of place, your makeup done flawlessly to enhance your natural features. you caught sight of him, sending a wink his way before blowing him a kiss. “she’s getting it tonight.” he held a hand over his heart, watching the way your hips swayed as cameras flashed from every direction. rafe stayed standing up until you disappeared behind the stage, his smile reaching from ear to ear.

“now that’s a show..” he adjusted himself in his pants, posting you on his instagram with the caption; ‘she’s perfect.’

eventually, the event came to a star strucking end, your boyfriend meeting you soon after with a huge bouquet of pink roses. you couldn’t help the sudden wave of emotions from washing over you at the sight of him. “oh, rafe!” you threw yourself into his arms, being careful not to ruin your makeup. “you were so amazing out there, baby.” he rubbed your back. “yeah?” you pulled away, pecking his lips. “fuck yeah.” his voice dropped a few octaves, his hand finding the curve of your ass. “can you take those angel wings home?” he whispered.

“yes.. why?” you smiled mischievously. “cause i need you to walk for me again. naked this time.”

[signedkoko]

Oo could I request romantic Vees with a reader who's this famous singer/idol in Hell? (Think, way more than Fizzarolli-level famous)

Valentino | Velvette | Vox [Romantic]

In which you are one of the most popular performance artists in all of hell. Reader is female.

Your name was more than just 'known'; it was plastered along buildings and chanted by millions

He was always scouting for personalities, following trends in people to see who he could drag down into his vicing grip

But you were untouchable, the first thing he couldn't command to their knees before him

Even so, if Val wanted to meet you, he could, and it was extremely new to the overlord to have to go out of his way to meet someone, but he felt it was worth it

He claims it was because you had possible talent, but those closest to him know he had a bit of a celebrity crush

Valentino is not one to be nervous; he would be direct when telling you that he wanted you, again and again, until you eventually granted him at least one night out, just the two of you

Once he has his chance, he'll pull out every stop just to hear you say that you'd like to see him again

He gets so distracted with you that he forgets the part about getting you into his company, eventually brushing it off by saying you 'didn't suit what he was looking for'

Avoiding being under his contract meant he could never command you, which meant he never had anything to be angry with you about

According to him, you were a role model for all the demons he owned

Famous stars require famous stylists, and who better than Velvette?

You'd actually reached out to her personally, since a lot of her work inspired your current stylists, and you wanted an upgrade for your tour of hell

Idol's like you were the exact thing people like Velvette dreamed of having in their portfolio, and she insisted on meeting you so she could see what you were looking for

In all her years, she'd never met an idol so genuine—most were snobbish, greedy, or just told her to 'do whatever'

You came in with photos of things you liked, hell, even fabrics you preferred, and a set list of what your songs would look like in order

She was already in love

You get her personal creations, and she insists on being the one to tailor you herself

" Only the best for the best, right? "

She can feel her bitchy attitude melt, and though she gets extremely bothered when anyone interrupts your sessions together, you ground her

It's not long before you two become official, and while she can't follow you into the deeper rings of hell, she will always be sure to watch your performances in the background while she works

She constantly calls you 'doll', because she's always dressing you up

Influences, aristocrats, idols—none of it was new to the king of social media

Everyone contacted him for their social management, or his team, at least

He didn't do much of the personal work himself; he had far too much on his plate, but he always checked on who was requesting his services

Mostly for the ego boost, knowing the image of so many self-proclaimed "stars'' relied on him

But there was also a list of people he wanted to work for, a list that brought his ego back down and told him he hadn't met his goals yet and had to try harder

You were at the very top

He'd seen a plethora of your performances recorded and reuploaded: best takes, most underrated performances, and unforgettable sets

But he'd never had the chance to see you live until he got a PR package regarding your newest album release

Him? It was certainly interesting to...no shot, you sent him hidden tickets for 'friends only'

He is not fangirling except maybe a bit; he's already cleared his schedule that evening so he can get there and making sure his outfit is cleaned up and ready

Your performance was out of this world, and he is beyond pleased when he is invited backstage to speak with you

There you were, taking off your earrings in your dressing room, smiling at him as if you were old friends

" How was the performance? I'm so glad you came. "

For a moment, hes almost worried you have the wrong person; he seems uncertain of what to say until you continue

" I heard you are hard to win over, so I figured I'd go all out before I ask if you'd consider running my new album compaigne? "

He acts cool, but when he gets home that evening, he is pumping his fist in the air and screaming

Author's Note - I was thinking lilith-level famous, you are THAT girl... Thank you for requesting! I went for a fem! reader because it was no specified

[naburi]

DO YOU THINK I’M PRETTY?

MOMO X READER

TAGS: NTR, GANGBANG, DOUBLE PENETRATION, MOUTHFUCK, CREAMPIE, REVENGE SEX

1.6K WORDS

You heard men laughing in the background, they can’t comprehend what is happening right before their eyes. It was 6 cocks surrounding a kneeling girl who's still in her school uniform. The video shows your childhood friend trying to put two cocks in her mouth.

It’s a slow afternoon in the campus, the professor's voice can’t find its way into your ear as you seem too deep in your thoughts. You want to have a conversation with her to know how she let that happen. Momo is your childhood friend, you grew up together and you know she’s not that type of person. How can the innocent and naive girl, who easily gets scared over the smallest of things let herself get used like a fuckdoll by the varsity team.

One of the varsity players in the video is your classmate, he boastingly shows you the video of them doing it with Momo. He said they invited Momo to a late night celebration as they won over a rival division. He said the girl knew that it was all men there but still decided to hang out. You wanted to ask for more details but your classmates easily got irritated and jokingly said that you should see how she’s begging them to not stop filling her holes. It made you angry how he brags about it but it also made you feel jealous, if it wasn’t for your shyness, you could have confessed your feelings to your childhood friend.

You decided to message her later in the night, you wanted to make sure that she’s okay. You’re in limbo if you should open up about the video you saw but you’re afraid to make her uncomfortable.

“He cheated with my classmate,” Momo said in the text message. The star player of the varsity team breaks her heart. This is her first relationship and first heartbreak, you can’t imagine how hurt she must have felt.

“Can I visit you tomorrow?” You asked, you wanted to comfort her, it’s been a long time since you spent time with one another. She has been distant to you ever since she got a boyfriend.

You’re infront of her apartment waiting for her to open the door, you are bringing canned beers and some snacks just like she requested. Momo welcomes you with her “just woke up” face. She’s wearing a tight crop top which gives you a better look of her nipples as she’s not wearing anything underneath, her exposed skinny waist which looks like she hasn't eaten anything good for a while, and her loose shorts that’s hanging too low in her small waist. This look of her made you feel hot the seconds you saw her.

You made fun of how she probably hasn't taken a bath for a few days which she loudly denies those allegations, you keep exchanging insults and banters like how it was when you were younger. Sitting comfortably in her living area, Momo opens the canned bears as the conversation gets serious. She’s tearing up while explaining how she found her boyfriend cheated on her. They have been together for a few months and she admitted that she gives her virginity to him because he threatens to break up with her.

“I watched a video of my boyfriend getting his dick sucked by my classma…,” she can’t finish her sentence as she’s still hurt by what he found on her ex’s phone.

Momo stated that she wants to hit back at her ex by “dating” one of his teammates, not telling her that you know what really happened, how you watched a video of the 6 teammates taking turns putting their dick on her destroyed tight pussy. Momo is laying on her back in a small dining table, lifted skirt, exposed boobs through her opened up uniform, masturbating dicks on both her hands, her tongue giving two dicks equal attention, one member pumping his dick inside her while the other member is making sure that all of this are getting recorded.

She asked to cheer bottles before you both drank the beer. She goes on to share how terrible her boyfriend is while your mind is playing the part of the video where the girl in front of you is getting her mouth stuffed by a thick cock while his pussy getting rammed at the same time. The boys in the background loudly cheer about the erotic scene they are witnessing. Some of them are getting their hands through her tight body feeling up all of her softness. Some slaps and grope her boobs while it’s aggressively moving due to the pounding she’s taking in both directions. The video closed up on her drooling mouth while she’s still getting mouthfucked, then it pans out to her crempied pussy while it’s still getting pounded hard.

“Do you think I’m pretty?” The more she drinks, the more Momo opens up to you. You were stunned by her sudden questions, you remember the times that you almost confessed to her but pulled back at the last second.

“I like you,” you said softly, maybe it’s the alcohol but you finally found courage to confess to her. You're looking at her in the eyes hoping for an answer.

“Kiss me,” Momo said with a straight face. She doesn’t have the same feelings for you but the fact that one person likes her is enough for her.

Your body moves first before you can comprehend what’s happening. You started to kiss her aggressively knowing you waited for this for a long time. Your hands sink down as you grope her boobs, wanting more, you pull up her crop top. You pinch and pull her hard nipples which made Momo moan. You made her lay down on her sofa while kissing hard on her neck making sure she will go to school with the hickeys you made.

You remember how the 6 boys left kiss bruises all over her body, not wanting to get out done, from her neck to her tits, you made sure to leave as many hickeys as they left.

Momo felt hot the way you hungrily kissed her body. She guides your head to her shorts. You notice the wet spot forming in her shorts, you pull down to see how wet she is. This is the same pussy that gets rammed by the players. Blinded by anger, you put two fingers quickly inside her. Momo gasped by your sudden movement, she starts to moan loudly as you ram your fingers directly into her g-spot. She has no idea that this aggressiveness stems from pain you felt after watching her get gangbanged.

“FUCK ME PLEASE” she shouted out with her orgasm.

You wasted no time, you aligned your cock in her entrance. Looking at her in the eyes, she have the same look back when they are taking turns fucking her. She’s looking at you like she’s pleading to get her pussy pounded hard, which you’re more than happy to give. You hold her small waist to fuck her hard from the get go. You wanted to fuck her more aggressive than they did to her, you pound your dick inside out to her like you want her pussy to only remembers your cock.

Momo can only moan with her eyes closed as she’s getting overwhelmed by the pleasure your dick is giving. She remembers the time that she caught you staring at her body but doesn’t confront you with it to retain your friendship, she never thought you could fuck her as hard as your doing right now.

You put her thick legs over your shoulder to get deeper inside her, this made Momo intensely moan, you go deeper each thrust making sure you feel all of her inside. You felt her inside walls tighten, signaling she’s near orgasm again. Your thrusts get harder as you're about to cum as well. She asked you to pull out but you remember how all of the boys creampie on her, felt insulted by her suggestions, you fucked her pussy rapidly making both of you orgasm in unison.

You pulled out and watched how your cum, drip out of her. She moves her body to the side like she’s about to sleep which you didn’t let her. You move her head hanging over the sofa just her position in the video. Momo is trying to protest but you are hellbent on destroying her holes more than they did to her. You shove your stiff cock in her mouth, you see the form of your cock down her throat. The girl is mumbling, trying to say something but you pull your cock just to hardly put it back down her throat. You hold her head in position as you continue your rampage against her mouth.

You saw her mouth drool just like it did in the video, which pushed you even more to pump her mouth longer. You notice that she’s stopped mumbling which makes you worry that you go too far. You pulled out your cock but kept slapping your wet dick to her face reminding her that you’re not with her. Momo gasped for air but it didn’t take long before you put it back inside her throat to continue using her mouth. The girl is moving her tongue around your cock while it’s inside her mouth to give you more pleasure, accepting her faith that she's your fuckdoll now. This added pleasure made your cock twitch. You groan Momo’s name as you leave out a huge load deep down her throat. Untidy hair, teary eyes, cum drooling out her mouth. You made Momo a mess.

[snoopychris]

masterpiece

warnings: one mention of sex

in which... matt is absolutely whipped

matt can walk into your house like he owns the place. your father adores him. your mother has more trust in him than she does in you. he even has his own key! it’s crazy to you how he got your parents trust so fast, but you don’t question it. even then, he still knocks. every. single. time.

it could be 8am. it could be noon. it could be late in the afternoon. it could even be the middle of the night. he always knocks.

this time was 5:30 pm. you’re the first to stand from your spot in the living room to get the door, beating out your mom and dad to do it. though you smile at the sight, you still groan when you see matt on the other side of the door. he’s holding your favorite flowers, the same way he does once a week, but this time he’s also holding your favorite chocolates as well. he’s dressed fancier than usual, a nice sweater and a nice pair of dress pants , all tied together by his glasses. “you do know that you have a key to this place right nerd?” you mumble, greeting him with a kiss. he shrugs as he shoves his hand in his pocket, whispering to you.

“are you busy?” your eyes furrow in response, looking over to your parents on the couch. “nope. why?” you whisper, setting the flowers in the vase you’ve kept by your door every week since matt started coming over. he smiles at you, tucking hair behind your ear.

“i’m takin you out. on a date. a real date. to somewhere nice. i even needed a reservation.” your dad overhears and sends him a thumbs up from his spot on the couch, making you giggle.

“y’picked a good one sweetie. he even came over the other day and asked for permission to take you.” he yells, making you blush. you cannot believe just how incredibly lucky you were.

“there’s also no way you’re going to this restaurant in sweatpants. go change. something nice.” he smiles, pressing a kiss to your cheek. you’re ready in record time. your parents parade you with pictures like it’s prom night. you’re giggling the entire time, and matt’s just completely and utterly star struck.

the drive to the dinner is calm. it’s peaceful. matt’s hand rests on your thigh and though he’s tempted to inch it further up, he’s respectful. there’s not a care in the world. nothing matters to matt other than you. nothing matters to you other than matt. every single care is gone, completely out the window. completely forgotten. but every time he looks at you, matt thinks he’s looking at an original Monet. if he could frame the moment, he would. he wants to shrink you down and keep you in a cage forever, just so that he can keep an eye on you the entire time. god, you were perfect.

the restaurant looks nice. it looks like just another steakhouse. the second you sit down, it is not just another steakhouse. you slam the menu down on the table, glaring at matt. “matt a single steak is one hundred and twenty five fucking dollars.” and in matt’s eyes, to deserved this in more. it doesn’t matter to him that he had to work 80 hours to afford it. it just matters that you’re happy.

matt smirks at you, shrugging. “i saved up my paychecks. my girl deserves something nice doesn’t she?” he whispers, adjusting his glasses on his face. you shake your head in disbelief, flipping through the pages for something decently affordable. his eyes widen when you speak. “you’re getting some tonight, kid.”

a/n: fluff won! sorry for you angst whores :///

dividers by @issysh3ll !!!

🏷️: @ifwdominicfike @frankoceanfanpage @mattssslutbby @sophand4n4 @matthewsturnsgf @izzylovesmatt @m11rx @chris-hallelujah @sturniolotoast @mattsbrat @wastelandzella @le4hsblog @mattsd0llfac3 @st7rnioioss @isabellewhatt @sturnslutz @chrisscoraline @m4ttg1rl @princessesgarden @ikyoudreamofme @allylovescody @ayesha-eroticaa @ivysturnss @slutformatt17 @user1smvtysturniolo

[shnowyfox]

Jollyformers AU (

so basically i turned the holiday themed au. i haven't had the time to flesh it out obviously. TFONE megop regardless of this au is Last Christmas by Wham!

lore! so instead of cogs they have sleigh bells! usually worn via a collar though harnesses are worn as well to hold more bells that are decorative only. Idk what im doing with transformation yet but i think either it's completely replaced by the bell's allowing flight, or, transformation into creatures to pull the sleigh (basically everyone has a beast alt, deer and ungulates being the most common) Optimus obviously being a reindeer, megatron (krampus) is a goat to fit with his krampus thing, b-127 (glee-127, Badassaclaus) is supposed to be elf like with his g1 style horns supposed to look like elf ears too but they can be seen as budding antlers as well, and elita I haven't drawn yet but she's either a reindeer too or gazelle. (also considering giraffe with that neck dayum girl)

"Prime" has been replaced with "Claus"

hats are just for jolly good fun. like this whole au. and a bit of religious healing. anything goes rlly.

and now a snippet of a rewrite I never was able to finish up. Some of this HAS been retconned. i'm still working at it. mainly the occupation and the backstory stuff. (Context: Bartholomeus is another name for Krampus i dont remember where or when but that's what Megatronus has been substituted with.)

Deer Trax: (chuckles) Okay, fellas! Thanks for the jolly start. You want to give me another one?

Sentry 1: You’re naughty!

Deer Trax: I’ll take that as a no.

Elf-16: (grunts) Hey! Watch where you’re going!

Sentry 1: Oh… What did you say, no-bell?

Elf-16: Sorry, sir, I didn’t mean you. I was referring to the elf who was behind you.

Sentry 2: What? Where’d he go?

Elf-16: The joyous red and blue elf? Has a big grin, merry cheer, gives off a yankee candle scent?

Sentry 1: Where is he?

Elf-16: He went that way.

Sentry 1: When I get my hands on that elf…

Elf-16: All right, all clear.

Deer Trax: Okay, D-16, I may be a little vanilla, but “Yankee ”? That is too far.

Elf-16: Let me guess. Chased out of the cookie jar?

Deer Trax: (laughs) Yeah. I had to jump out of a sleigh this time. Almost got an ouchie (laughs) It was wild.

Elf-16: And digging through fortune cookies is worth getting an ouchie?

Deer Trax: Yes, it is.

Elf-16: I need a new best friend.

Deer Trax: If there are clues in our recorded history that can help locate the North Star, they’re in the cookie jar.

Elf-16: Sentinelf Claus, the Sentinelf Claus, is up in the blizzard right now, risking his merriment for us in search of the Star.

Deer Trax: That’s exactly what I’m doing. I’m trying to help him.

Elf-16: Yeah, okay. (laughs)

Deer Trax: The sooner cookies bake again, the sooner we won’t have to make toys ourselves. Don’t you want to choose your own path, do whatever you want?

Elf-16: We’re toy makers. We make toys, that’s all.

Deer Trax: No, there has got to be something more I can do. I can feel it. (Dentistry?)

Elf-16: Oh, yeah? Like the time you had a “feeling” you could fly without a bell?

Deer Trax: You said you were never gonna mention that again.

Elf-16: Took me three days to dig you out of the snow. Your feelings get you in trouble.

Deer Trax: Yeah, yeah.

Elf-16: Just trust in Sentinelf Claus.

Deer Trax: I do trust in him. Hey, if we did have bells…

Elf-16: I’d fly hooves first into your chest

Deer Trax: I don’t like how fast you answered that. But listen, if you did kick me, I couldn’t give you this awesome Bartholomeus Claus thing I have here. It’s cool. I’ll give it to someone else.

Elf-16: What Bartholomoeus Claus thing?

Deer Trax: Ah, it’s nothing. Just a, you know, mint-condition Bartholomeus Claus sweater, first edition.

Elf-16: (gasps) What?

Deer Trax: If you don’t want it, I can just throw it away.

Elf-16: Throw it away? Don’t… That’s not funny. Let me see.

Deer Trax: Wait. Don’t grab. You’re gonna rip it.

Elf-16: You know, Sentinelf says Bartholomeus was the…

Deer Trax: The kindest Claus to ever live. I know, buddy. Looks good on you.

[nouearth]

a star in the making.

chad meeks-martin x male reader x danny brackett.

wc: 4.8k. genre: smut. warnings: explicit sex, threesome, spitting, gagging, throat-fucking, slapping, rough-handling, double-penetration, dirty-talk, video recording, top!danny, top!chad, bottom!reader.

a/n: and i thought i couldn't get nastier.......

request: anon.

“and...” chad centered the tripod by the foot of the bed after locking the legs sturdy to the ground. the camera was tilted down at a slight degree, framing the bed into position, and once the stability met his standard, he pressed the record button with a smile. “we’re set.”

you’ve been watching him, bare except your briefs, kneeled on the bed while curiosity trapped your mouth into a vault. one, two, and three tripods surrounded the bed; one at each side, and the final one settled in the middle, directly feasting your obedience with its camera lens. when you looked to the left, so was danny, transfixed by the eagerness you held, and even sprouted, when all three cameras blinked red.

“all set from here.” danny chuckled, a gentle pat to the arm of the tripod assured its stability.

normally, others would be nervous, confidence beaten by nerves, if they were to be recorded like this.

as cliché as it sounded, you weren’t like others.

everywhere you turned, all eyes were on you, and you warmed another smile, shy yet alluring because you wanted this, and so did they. every blink of red fueled a need inside of you. a desire to perform, and you were motivated to make a stunning debut, even if it would only be in the hands and eyes of the two men.

“do you always record these stuff?” there was admiration in your eyes, and it reflected onto their smiles, egotistical and cocky, as each man gave the camera one more check.

“only those that are willing, and…” chad climbed onto the bed, towards you, until he found your lips in its scurried endeavor. sweet at first, but his tongue pushed your mouth open wider, merely having his fix of the taste of your desire. you took him in with a laugh, moaned when his tongue slid to you, over you, in an open-mouthed venture.

“those we think can take it,” a low whisper rumbled in the other side of your ear and before you could break away from the kiss, you were pulled to another pair of plump flesh, rougher now as danny held your jaw, tasted the remnants of chad, and most importantly—you. “take us with no problem.”

both of their warm bodies sandwiched you into a comforting embrace of heat and need. chad pressed his palm to your inner thigh, squeezing while his lips found a home near your clavicle. “introduce yourself.”

it was a pain for danny to tear himself from the kiss, but he does so at chad’s demand, pecking you once more on the center of your swollen pair before nodding towards the center camera. “scoot up a little. name, age, and why you’re here.”

you do as you were told, scooting up, though not too far from the nude pair, and gazed into the void of the camera lens as you revealed your name and age. “i’m here because…”

“i…” wary eyes found their way back to the two men, and they nodded, assuring you of the process, but also for you to continue it because you can smell it—lust. “want to be fucked.”

“whoa, someone has a potty mouth.” chad cracked, and danny joined with a chuckle. “quarter in the swear jar, (m/n).”

danny then reached over to pinch at the soft flesh on your waist, sucking in a lower lip because the gentlest touch made you jolt. “how do you want to be fucked?”

“you too, danny.” chad laughed, nudging the aforementioned man’s bare side with his elbow, and danny abided with another squeeze to your waist, dropping air into chad’s jar.

“i guess, well… hard.” the thought trailed your words into a mutter, and you took a beat before confessing, a rush of heat fled to your cheeks and neck. “i want to be wrecked.” your thumb began drumming on the mattress, hands planted by your hip. “don’t get me wrong, i love vanilla as much as anyone, but sometimes, you just need to spice things up.”

“i get that,” you felt a rough hand spider down your spine, then explored the canvas of your skin like a fresh book. the tensed muscles in your back told a story. from the way you shivered when he caressed near your waist, to the way you exhaled a heavy sigh he squeezed at your right shoulder, he wanted to dissect every fiber of your being—every chapter to the story. “so, you’re saying you’d do anything to get wrecked?”

“anything.” another breathy sigh fell to your lips when danny leaned forward to latch to the other side of your neck, suckling deep and hard enough to then draw a moan. a soft one, but nonetheless, he was endeared by it, persuaded to dig another one out of you, and he does so easily.

“anything?” danny mumbled into the sore spot of your neck before moving onto another patch of skin, repeating the same process while blindly taking your hand to rest on his erection, growing bigger and thicker in your palm.

in midst, chad stroked himself silently to the melt of your body, to the wet sounds of danny’s hickeys, to the goosebumps on your arm when he began fondling your thigh, to the sudden spring and hop of your cock, when danny made you squeeze your hand around him, guiding you in loose pumps. 

you can’t let go. not that you would want to in the first place, because he filled you up with girth, thick and heavy in your sweaty palm, unshaven thick hairs woven into the indentation of your fingers as you stroked danny’s cock, squeezed the pulsating veins until he was throbbing hard.

“you like that big cock?” danny unraveled your fist before slapping the thick of shaft onto the center of your palm, a smirk sprouted while you watched agape. hypnotized by the stiffness of his meat, then the bounce of his balls when he brought your hand beneath the sack, stroking himself to your enchantment. the thick and loose sack bounced heavily into your palm, even with the slowest rhythm, and it was embarrassing to admit how easily you could come undone from this.

“or do you like this big cock more, hm?” suddenly, your other hand felt warm, hot now as your fingers wrapped around another thick girth. more curved compared to the former, and you pleasantly confirmed it with your eyes, gulping down any forthcoming opinions. 

you couldn’t answer. they were both… so different. danny’s cock was bushier, plumper in the head with a thick skin covering majority of the glans, and curved downwards as if it was made to fuck your throat, as if the sheer weight of his own cock wasn’t able to sustain itself. while chad’s cock sported a proud curve, a slope that was practically made to accommodate the size of your hand and your needy strokes, and most importantly, as if it was made to break you. both of their cocks were, if you were being honest. you’d have no complaints if one were to switch roles with the other, because in the end, you’d have them either way.

in any way.

“both, you know i can’t decide, i—“ you swallowed and looked at chad, licking your lips when you switched your gaze back to his cock, then to danny’s, then back to chad’s again. a delirious dilemma ruined you, and your mouth itched to solve it.

“well, if you can’t decide then,” danny began kneeling tall on the bed, towering over your position, and chad followed suit. two shadows loomed over you, engulfed you with darkness, and you swallowed any amount of pride you had left because you never felt smaller. your hands released their cocks and you watched as their shadows swung heavily over your face like tree branches over a windowsill. “you’re going to have to work extra hard tonight.”

“i said i’d do anything,” musk was heavy in the air, and even more so when you inhaled beneath danny’s cock, the tip of your nose trailed along the downward curve, and then you juxtaposed it with chad’s, sniffing upwards like an animal in heat, touching yourself through your tightened briefs. “right?”

“right.” when your nose reached the tip of chad’s cock, chad took the perfect opportunity to shove your promise down your throat. 

thick and heavy on your tongue, your mouth stretched wide to lodge his length as far as you could, wetting and swallowing him with difficulty. it was further helped by danny’s palm on the back of your head, his fingers locked into your hair while he pushed you lower, denuding you into a gargled mess of gags and coughs.

“fuck, that’s a good boy. look at how well you’re taking chad’s cock.” danny’s grip on your hair was stronger, harder, as he yanked you up for barely a breath. you inhaled with a gasp, in what felt like a millisecond, before it was exhaled into another gag when he pushed the remaining oxygen into the pit of your stomach. your eyes closed tight when danny’s hold on you kept your mouth grounded to chad’s pelvis. chad shivered, exhaled with a guttural groan, while you swallowed him whole, with tears in your eyes, with a force on your head that refused your pleas to be released, and you liked it—no, you loved it.

you loved having your jaw ache, having to breathe through your nose and into chad’s shaven hairs. when you were pulled back, you loved feeling that cathartic release of stealing back the oxygen that was taken away from you. you also loved seeing your spit drench chad’s heavy cock, coating it with thick sheen and small bubbles enough to weigh—swing—him down because your gags were uncontrollable, undeniably resistible. the spit was a bridge from your lips to the plump, swollen tip of his cock, and you drove through it on your own terms with eagerness. an amused laugh flushed your skin, and you could feel danny’s hand drop to the back of your neck, grasping the skin as if it could close your throat around the mouthful of cock.

“god, your mouth is fucking made for this.” chad breathed out, his muscles flexed when you swallowed him in your hot throat. another gag curled the inside of your stomach, and you pulled back up to slurp around him, sniffling fresh air, then spitting back out when you just slurped. your hand worked soundly, spreading the thick and sticky mixture of your saliva over his entire length in one buttery stroke. “you’re a cock whore, aren’t you? look how much of a mess you are. look how eager you are to take us both.”

“practically foaming at the mouth.” danny’s grin was replaced with awe as the swell of your lips beat redder. then astonishment when you greeted him with a lazy, spitting smile. “fuck.” 

several wet strokes now before you turned towards danny to take him down your throat, conforming to the portrait they’ve expected—anticipated—of you. they remained kneeling, each by your side, and while you pumped chad’s wet cock, you deviantly inhaled danny’s with a prideful smile, the sound of their collective groans only fueling it further. saliva dripped copiously from your mouth, and you slurped whatever would try to leak out, even if your mouth was full.

“shit, that’s what i’m talking about,” he gently slapped the side of your cheek that bulged from his cock, groaning louder when you pressed the inside of the flesh harder to the swollen head. then again, and again, and you profusely took the several quick slaps until your cheek memorized the shape of his cock—every vein and every inch. “you like that big cock, don’t you?” the sound of your moan vibrated around him, and danny shuddered. “yeah, you do. fuck.”

there would be moments where your mouth felt overstuffed, so you’d release danny in one smooth, moaning pull, and tongue his balls. they bounced heavily on the flicking muscle, rolled within the messy slobber of your mouth, and twitched when you dragged the heavy weight all over your face, smearing the spittle and musk over your chin, lips, nose, forehead. back again, until it inked deep into you. you slapped danny’s cock several times onto your cheek, hard and wet on the bone, and you moaned, delirious, as you stuck your tongue out for him, staring up at the doting gaze that laved over you. 

until you smelled of nothing but a whore.

you then did the same to chad, because you were greedy. cock was all you could think about, and you wanted to drown yourself in it even if you couldn’t breathe. danny’s gaze over you were hazy when you alternated between sucks, and when you switched over to sucking off chad again, his were enlightened. “you look so good like this, fuck…” 

as if they read your mind, the two men scooted closer until the flush of your cheeks was surrounded by their cocks, dripping in your matter. the cameras winked with red, and you smiled towards the center while you stroked both the heavy weights simultaneously, alternating your tongue back to the glans after you refueled your breath.

“fuck, this is what i’m talking about.” your face scrunched when you pulled danny’s foreskin forward, squeezing the skin till it masked the swollen head, and you drooled when a thick string of pre-cum leaked from the slit. his moans fell along with the web of fluid, low and guttural as if you pulled those sounds straight from him.

before you could have a turn with chad’s cock, he was set on his own endeavor to rapture you as your mouth was back to being filled again. a gasp buried deep into your wet throat, words gargled now because danny unexpected pushed into your mouth as well, and all you could do was take it. you took their two cocks in your mouth, breathing quickly because you’ve never felt so full.

“holy fuck— that’s a good boy, fuck.“ chad breathed heavily, his hold on the back of your head stronger as he pushed you forward to their thrusts.

“god, where did you find him? haven’t felt a mouth like this in fucking forever.” danny groaned when your teeth brushed against him, and your heart raced because you needed to open your mouth wider. impossibly bigger to properly take the both of them. passion was fortified by their astounded comments, and you heard every appraisal in the book, quickly took your briefs off and stroke your cock to it, because you could come from this. 

from being full.

your mouth stretched with a sting building at the corners, and no matter how many times you tried to blink the feeling away, they only pulled the flesh open, wider, more and more, as they did their best to fuck into your throat. minuscule thrusts, careful not to hurt you, but nonetheless, driven by their animalistic need to wreck you. their cocks rubbed and poked together, against one another, veins throbbed unevenly into the back of your throat. there were lazy attempts to slurp the copious amount of saliva dripping out, but it was futile at this point when you were practically like a waterfall at this point. 

the cameras shamed you for who you were in this moment, calling you disgusting names as they watched you become a bubbling, gargling mess. as they watched chad and danny fuck into your gargles. helpless, but they weren’t here to save you. 

they were here to watch.

“fuck, baby—“ chad yanked your head back and you thankfully coughed out a mixture of a choke and a gasp before it could be trapped down your throat when he pulled you up for a kiss. sloppily and heavy, and you moaned heavenly when chad’s tongue was the completely opposite taste of his cock. “i think you deserve a reward, don’t you think, dan?”

“a big reward,” behind you, a strong pair of arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you back into a cozy embrace. the hairs on danny’s chest tickled your back at first, but soon it warmed you, chasing away the goosebumps the draft had left on you. though only briefly, because the familiar bumps returned when his lips found their way to your shoulder after you both fell back onto the bed. his arms around you guarded the impact, and you couldn’t have been more grateful for the warmth that engulfed you. “i think we should fulfill his wish to be wrecked, right? can’t have him leaving empty-handed, chad.”

ironically, you were sure that you were going to leave the night memorizing the shapes of their cock.

“i agree,” you could feel danny’s cock brush against your ass when he lifted your legs, his hands locked together over the bent of them while he pushed your knees to your chest, your body pinned to his. chad blew a playful whistle when the position exposed your hole to him, puckering and aching for some type of fill, and slathered a careless amount of lube over his cock, his hands, and your hole. “damn, i just know it’s going to be a tight fit. bet you haven’t gotten fucked in weeks, right?”

“m-mm...” a finger stammered your words as it slid in, gently pumped inside of you, worked you open until you were open enough to fit another digit. “it’s been a while—i need to be fucked, please.” you pleaded to chad, then to danny when you turned your head to kiss him on the lips, and the soft rubies vibrated when he chuckled, amused at your neediness.

“how badly do you want to be fucked again?” chad asked, a feign of cluelessness while he curled and parted his fingers, now three, inside you. knuckle-deep, wriggling within your tight walls.

“s-shit—so fucking bad, please. i’m begging.” your voice cracked, desperate to remind him, but you’ve lost the ability to form sentences, mere babbles now when danny stroked your cock with one hand, and held you back with the other. “please, i want to be wrecked—“

“okay,” his broad chest rose when he pulled himself out of you, amused by how truly desperate you were by the suction of your hole, clinging onto the loss heat and the air that had replaced him. he then brought his fingers to his mouth, sucking the taste of your musk off with a delighted hum, before positioning himself. “you earned it.”

in one smooth move, chad pushed your awaiting rapture back into you, and he was granted with the utmost exhalation. he held onto your knees while you captured him, welcomed him, whimpered for him, and blossomed for him, with warmth and keenness. “shit, fuck, danny. you gotta try him.” you felt yourself cling onto him, not wanting to let him go, when chad selflessly pulled himself out again despite your whines.

“yeah?” your body moved with danny’s as he adjusted himself beneath you, shifting into a more comfortable position, and once he does, you immediately felt swollen when he pulled you back again, opened you, and filled the loss of warmth with his own. it throbbed and pulsated heavily the more he slid his thick girth into you, and your arms sprawled out to grasp at the bedsheets, groaning and whimpering when you feel yourself stretched to the fullest. “fuck, everything about you is perfect, isn’t it? that fucking mouth of yours, and now this hole? fuck...”

they took their time with you, alternating between filling you up and stroking themselves when one sated their desires to completely ravish you with a thrust, and another, and another. you took each of them with pride, dazed because you were completely exhausted at this point, your muscles like jelly, but the stretch never failed to remind you where you were, ground you to reality, as the feeling burned into your brain.

a drunken stupor removed you of your thoughts, feelings, and sight. you thought of nothing but incredible, eye-rolling pleasure. you saw nothing but the sweaty bodies colliding against you, rocking into you. you felt nothing but the feeling of being full, of being stretched to your best ability. you were brain-numbingly fucked, sweat dripping from hairline to your cheek fucked, to your chest fucked, until you felt an incense of pain again. 

and the sweat seemed to have stung now. it was near your fill, a prod to your hole despite danny already occupying his rightful spot, and you felt a slow push that roped a groan from within you. “shit—“

“hold still,” danny breathed into your ear, then suckled on your earlobe to distract you from the painful intrusion down south. his palm squeezed your cock, stroking it now, while he rubbed your stomach as if it would open you up from underneath. “just keep breathing.”

“you’re a good boy, right? be a good boy for me—us, hm?” chad was huddled over you, his shadow masked the pain in your expression, but it melted when he kissed you again, sweetly compared to before. you could only return it shortly before you choked out an uncomfortable moan into his mouth. he pushed himself further into your occupied hole with a staggered groan, joining danny in its burial, and kissed you once more to let you adjust to the stretch of their two cocks.

“o-oh, god…” it knocked every breath out of you, even when you were laying still. your walls burned uncomfortably, stung around the two cocks that had fill you up with so much weight, yet you couldn’t have been more grateful. you were intoxicated in this state, and one would describe you as fucking mad for even attempting to take the two men at once.

but you weren’t like others.

“fuck me,” you hadn’t even had a chance to adjust to the stretch, but you knew you would eventually. impatience ran through your blood, and adrenaline followed in another route through your veins. “fuck me.” you said clearer, rocking your hips against them, and they collectively groaned when you squeezed tight. your cock twitched during this matter, and with one final kiss to your lips from chad, a wet one to the underside of your jaw, you felt yourself blossom completely.

danny began with slow ruts, rubbing his thick girth against chad’s while he held onto your waist. you groaned at every moment, but with every thrust, the pain began to slowly subdue itself into a river of familiarity. “shit, fucking feels amazing, fuck.”

then chad followed once you opened up for them, impressively more and more within minutes, and he thrusted with alternating patterns. slow at first, but he picked up the pace when you pulled him down for a kiss, begging into his mouth for more. more of him, more of danny, more of their cocks, more. 

whenever danny would roll up into you, chad would pull his hips back, and it didn’t take very long for them to establish a see-saw like rhythm. you were in a constant state of elation as they repeatedly filled you, slamming into your sweet spot like hey had memorized it from the first time they brushed against it. 

“fuck!” your body bounced in correlation with danny’s own hips, roughly thrusting up into you, while chad was the top layer that sandwiched you into a behemoth hold, chasing after his own high with eager plunges. the bed creaked louder, adding into the symphony of wet skin becoming vulnerable with one another, opening for one another, entering and filling one another. and your moans, their moans. they were the consonance and dissonance of the explicit music that your bodies had constructed. 

labored breaths tickled your ear and thick air surrounded your folded body. you have never felt so stretched, so pleasantly used, and the two men thought same same, fucking into you at the same rhythm now. both of their cocks drove into you, shoved themselves into you, forced themselves past your limit until they broke you. you screamed in delirious might, clutched at chad’s chest, then reached back to tug at danny’s hair, then released to fuck your fist. it was a sight to behold, a feeling many would be envious of, and you were reminded that the cameras were on you. all of this could be known, could be shown, and everyone could know how incredible you were. 

how much of a star you were, how perfectly constructed you were made to be fucked, and your eyes rolled back, denuding yourself of those thoughts with several strong pulses. “s-shit!”

you came with a splatter, shooting all over your chest and body while you continued to stroke yourself through the messy reelease. your fist was drenched in cum, as was your body, and you felt some of it leaking to your side as the motions of danny’s thrust and chad’s rocked you. “f-fuck! keep fucking me, fuck! fill me up—“ 

fuck,” back and forth, they did. they propeled into you with a similarly hysterical state of mind. in and out, your ass burned with their two cocks constantly digging inside of you, violating every crevice while you rode out your orgasm. your hand naturally fell back as you took them, and danny’s mouth wrapped around your cum-covered fingers, suckling them off, and the salty taste was the final garnish that winded him into staggered pants of your name. with one last exertion of his hips, his thick cock pulsated once, twice, three times before completely spilling his load into you. “oh fuck… fuck, that was good.”

the warmth of danny’s thick cum pooled around chad’s cock, and he panted, his muscles flexing under the ceiling lights while he plunged himself deep into you, deep into the warm seed untill his shaft was practically covered in it—lubed thick. his shallow thrusts splattered the cum onto his heavy sack, webbing it to your ass, and chad pressed one more kiss to your lips again, tasting you before his sense of reality was sucked away by the holy gods, then expelled out into a series of unholy moans. “i’m going to come, fuck—“

with danny’s cock softening, chad added onto the pile of his cum, shooting load after load inside of you, spreading the thick of his seed all over the violation that they had caused you with sloppy thrusts, creaming the inside of your breached hole and his swollen dick until the pull of softening cocks released all that cum that had resided in you. they came out in squelches, thick and drool-worthy as it ran down your ass, and your hole twitched unevenly, not used to the feeling of emptiness. you clenched at whatever was left inside of you, a layer of cum that continued to naturally ooze out like whipped cream. if chad had another load left inside of him, he’d easily shower you in it. but instead, he watched, marveled in the beauty of your red, sore, and puckering hole, beating and pulsating from the wreck it had endured.

“fuck…” you exhaled a sigh of relief when you were able to finally put your legs down. they immediately tangled into danny’s as soon as you rolled off of him, and joined his side. 

he took you in, an arm around you pulled you closer, and the man took a moment to examine your face. a gentle hold to your chin, then a caress of his thumb to your lips. “you good?”

“yeah...” a half-smile graced his thumb, and you kissed the pad of it before averting your gaze to chad. sweat dripped from his bare body as he stopped the recording for each individual camera. the red blinked once more, and never returned for the remainder of the night.

you curled into danny’s embrace, using his chest as a pillow, and closed your eyes to the sound of his heart slowly approaching its normal rate.

“so,” a weight shifted on the bed, and then a strong, yet gentle hand caressed your arm. “i have a favor to ask.”

“what is it?” you murmured, eyes still shut. the comforting skim of chad’s palm anchored you to danny’s chest, but you gathered enough energy to drowsily peek behind you once before returning.

“there’s this frat party, and…” large digits spidered your arm in a playful manner, and you could hear the smile in his voice. “was wondering if you’d like to come?”

“yeah?” laughing, you tore yourself from danny, who was already in deep sleep snoring his high away, and turned to face chad. he was leaning over the side of the bed, one foot to support his weight, and your hand moved to play with the soft curl of his hair. “how many guys?”

“wanted to keep it a surprise, but…” he pulled the rest off his body onto the bed, embracing your sticky body close to his own. “may or may not be in…” he trailed off, looking up to silently count sheep.

“in...?” you sang inquisitively, though a whisper to not wake danny, and chad’s smile awakened foolishly before confessing.

“in the double digits.” 

nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. and if you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!

[fiapartridge]

you don't go to parties | j. hughes 🎆🪩✨

“i don’t know who im looking for ‘cause you don’t go to parties anymore…” you don’t go to parties, 5 seconds of summer

pairing: jack hughes x fem!reader

summary: after ending your relationship with jack, he finally plucks up the courage to attend a party—and all he can think about is you.

warning(s): cursing, smut (like they have sex but it’s more heated & slow than trying to be super smutty), angst + fluff?? (in some aspects LOL), also noticing now that there was no protection so beware lol

author’s note: i don’t write smut so this is probably the closest ill ever get to writing it LOL but it’s much more for the plot rather than it trying to be super 18+, r-rated type smut yk

wc: 4.01k

not proofread

Glitter hung in the air, every room bathed in a purple glow as Jack hung by the wall, nursing a beer he had managed to snag from the cooler outside. The air was thick with the scent of perfumes and sweat, and the music thumped in his chest, yet he felt—detached, almost alone in the scheme of things. 

The party was a blur of lights and sounds, of hookups and dancing. None of it held any interest for him, but his friends had practically begged him to come. They nagged him the entire summer to leave the lakehouse, to have a drink at the bar downtown, or even to just go on a drive with them, but Jack always came up with an excuse. “Can’t. Training for next season,” or “Gotta raincheck. Something came up.”

They knew what it was. It was obvious. He was missing you. You plagued his mind every second of every minute of every day. Jack knew he had messed up. The moments leading up to the collapse of your relationship replayed in his mind like a broken record—the arguments, the tears, the things he said that he couldn’t take back. The memories of you haunted him. He could feel you throughout the whole house.

You met Jack when you were 17. He hosted a draft party at the lake house the second he got back home to Michigan. Jack, being the cocky teenager he was at the time, made it an open-invite party. Sure, it wasn’t smart on his part but he was a clueless teen. He didn’t know better, but he thanks himself everyday knowing that that one decision led him to meeting you.

Your brother—one of Jack’s school friends—had been invited and asked if you wanted to come. You were hesitant at first. You had seen Jack around school, laughing loudly with his friends or pressing a girl up against the lockers, locking themselves together with heated kisses. You had always found him obnoxious, masking his stupidity with insensitive jokes and being portrayed as a “dumb jock.” But ever the hypocrite you were, because there you were, at that obnoxious, insensitive guy’s draft party. Go you.

Entering the house, you noticed the high ceilings and swarm of strangers that knew Jack better than you; who were probably wondering why you were even there, or who you even were. To your left, a group of friends talked animatedly on a set of plush couches, their drinks spilling out of their cups with every swing of their arms, and their makeup perfectly done on their face like they had hired professionals for this specific event. You felt out of place and, to your luck, your brother had abandoned you the second you stepped through that door.

Who knew you could be surrounded by hundreds of people, yet still feel so alone?

Weaving through the crowded house, you made your way to the backyard, which was just as packed as inside the house, except there was a slight breeze and it didn’t smell as terrible. String lights criss-crossed above the partygoers, creating a canopy of twinkling stars. A fire pit crackled in one corner, Adirondack chairs lining the perimeter as guests chatted all around you. The pool was lit within, its water glowing an intoxicatingly vivid blue. You stood there, watching the stillness of the water as everyone filled around you. The music thumped in your chest, in your ears, in your bloodstream, but you watched the water, and for a moment, you felt okay.

“I always wanna jump in at parties,” a deep voice said beside you. 

You hesitated before speaking. “Why don’t you? It’s your party, isn’t it?” you asked, face-to-face with the man of the hour. His chestnut hair was cut short, truly showing how young he is. You wondered how he could do this: have eyes on him at all times, have so many expectations weighing on his conscience, being judged constantly. It felt—suffocating, to say the least.

“Do you know how many hockey legends are here?” he laughed, as if the building was swarmed with secret spies. 

“And yet you’re standing here. Why’s that?” you asked, looking up at the boy.

And for the first time in your life, Jack Hughes looked at you. And it wasn’t in the gross, disgusted way he looked at clumsy kids in the hallway, or the way he looked at pretty girls like they were his next meal. He looked at you in earnest, an emotion you didn’t even know he was capable of possessing.

“Do you think I don’t know you?” he eyed you, his brow raising as you broke his—hate to admit it—intimidating gaze. You watched the water before you, crossing your arms over your chest as you began to feel that unwelcome, fish-out-of-water feeling again. Moving closer to you, his voice fell almost to a whisper as you felt chills run down your spine due to the proximity. “I know you’re the obnoxious girl that thinks she knows every answer to every question, who already judged every single person at this party without ever learning their names, who doesn’t like me, yet still came. Why’s that?” he asked, repeating the same question you had asked just moments before.

You felt bare in front of him, confused as to how he knew any of that stuff about you. Surely he was too busy making out with girls and slinging a stick around to pay attention to you. So why had he just read you like a book without you having to say a single word?

You shrugged. “I wanted to see what you were about, I guess.”

“Yeah?” he smirked, his tongue poking his cheek as you dared yourself not to look up at him. “How’d I do?”

“Not sure yet.”

He bumped his shoulder with yours, butterflies bumbling around your stomach. “Not just a dumb jock, you know. That’s all Luke.”

You scoffed quietly, a small smile playing on your lips as you lessened up the need to try to fight it. You were smiling because of Jack Hughes, and to be honest, you didn’t really mind it. “He asked me the difference between a square and a rectangle once,” you joked. You had some classes with Luke, and while you two weren’t best friends, you still talked to each other once in a while.

Jack laughed, watching Luke in the corner of his eye try to talk to a girl that was way too old for him. “You’re laughing,” he smiled, noticing you cover your face and still your giggles. “See, I’m not that bad.”

You rolled your eyes before looking up at him. He watched the partygoers on the other side of the pool mingling, his jawline sharpened and his moles scattering much of the surface area of his face. You hadn’t noticed much about his appearance until then, until you finally got a good look at him, at his personality.

You two sat poolside for a while, your legs dipped in the water as you talked about anything and everything. Occasionally people would pull him away to chat, but he would always come back to you, telling you all about the boring conversations, how much he hated networking at a party that’s supposed to be fun, how he hated being treated and expected to be like an adult when he was far from it.

He didn’t notice he was talking to you for so long until the party thinned and it was just you and him in the backyard. Cups littered all around you, his mom picking them up as she not-so-subtly eavesdropped on your conversation. His brothers were inside the house, watching you two from the kitchen window, and Trevor and Cole speculated who you even were while trying not to pass out on the couch in the living room.

For the first time in a while, Jack felt, I don’t know, good about himself? Like he wasn’t praised for doing such little things, or told he’s some amazing person just because he’s good at passing a puck around. Like he was able to talk, and someone was there to listen. And for some reason, he actually kind of liked being criticized by you. It showed that you paid attention; that you were real. He hadn’t met someone real in a while.

He remembered the time you had dragged him to a New Year’s Eve party at your friend Avery's apartment a couple years later.

He was wearing “2024”-shaped sunglasses that matched yours, and a shiny, gold, plastic fedora that made you laugh every time you looked at him. His arms were wrapped around you from behind as you entered the house, his lips planting a kiss on the crown of your head as you two separated to hug the group of people that stood near the door.

You talked to your friends, catching up on everything you guys missed in each other’s lives while in college. Jack snuck up behind you, kissing your cheek before slipping off your coat and placing it on the couch by the entrance. 

The party was chill, much more relaxed than any of the parties Jack was invited to that night. You had urged him to go to them, knowing he would have much more fun with his friends, singing karaoke, getting wasted, and blasting music until they can’t hear anymore, but he shook his head, saying, “Parties are only fun if you’re there,” he shrugged. “Besides, how am I supposed to get my New Year’s kiss without you?”

The two of you mingled for a while, sharing nostalgic stories about high school and the time Jack had confused “pads with wings” with pads and chicken wings. The living room was filled with soft music and the hum of conversations. Jack kept close, his hand finding yours every now and then as if to ask if you were okay, if you needed food or a refill on your drink, if you were tired and wanted to go home—you were always his first priority. 

As the night progressed, the countdown to midnight drew closer. People began to gather in the living room, excitement buzzing in the air. Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve played on the television as Jack pulled you to a spot where you could both see the screen. His arm wrapped around your waist, and you leaned into him, sniffing his cologne and laughing when he caught you.

Before you knew it, the countdown began and everyone started chanting along.

“Ten, nine, eight…”

You turned to Jack, his eyes locked on yours, a charismatic smile playing on his lips. Even after dating for five years, he still managed to make you nervous. You had hoped that that feeling would never go away. You want to be nervous because of Jack Hughes every single night—forever.

“Seven, six, five…”

The room seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you standing there.

“Four, three, two…”

Jack’s hand gently cupped your cheek, his palm warm and tender against your skin as you leaned into it. 

“One! Happy New Year!”

Cheers erupted around you, but all you could focus on was Jack as he leaned in—not too slow, not too fast—capturing your lips in an impossibly better-than-the-last, sweet, honey kiss. Your hands were in his hair, his were glued to your hips, and it was perfect. And for a moment, it was just you and him, sharing the first kiss of the new year.

When you finally pulled away, grins were etched to your faces. You still couldn’t believe he was yours.

“Happy New Year,” Jack whispered, his forehead resting against yours.

“Happy New Year,” you echoed.

Jack’s head rested against the wall behind him, his eyes closed, the music muffling around him as he thought back to the first time he said “I love you.”

It was your 18th birthday and you were celebrating it at the lake house. Knowing Alex, Trevor, and Cole, they planned this huge rager for you, inviting nearly half the neighborhood—and then some. 

After you said your hellos and knowing that the party could continue without you, you wandered upstairs, finding yourself in Jack’s room as you sat on his bed; his gray cover soft under your fingertips as you brushed over the fabric. You just needed a minute. 

Before you knew Jack—like, really knew Jack—you hadn’t had a birthday party in years. It wasn’t like your family didn’t care about you, or your friends didn’t want to celebrate you. Everyone in your life meant something to you, and you meant something to them too. You just couldn’t go to parties to save your life. You would walk in, see all the girls that are prettier than you, all the guys that act like you don’t exist, you’d get in your head, get overwhelmed, and leave quickly after. This just wasn’t for you.

And because Jack knew you, he knew you would be upstairs.

The door slowly creaked open, causing your head to rise, and a sigh to fall from your lips—just Jack. He smiled at you, shutting the door softly behind him as he sat beside you on the bed. You two sat surrounded by the soft glow of dim lamps, and the distant thumping of music that had seeped through the floorboards beneath your feet. 

His heart pounded in his chest. He knew you were beautiful, but sometimes he’s just so amazed by you, like you’re a new person every single day. Like there were new discoveries to be made, like he could never get bored with you. To Jack, you were everything. And who needs anything else in the world if he had everything sitting right beside him?

His hand rested on your thigh, his thumb running up and down the exposed skin. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

You furrowed your brows. “For what?”

He shrugged. “For the party. I know you didn’t want it.”

“It’s not that I didn’t want it,” you murmured, sighing. “It’s just—I’m not Trevor, or Cole, or the number one overall draftee, Jack Hughes,” you smirked, bumping your shoulder with his. 

He shook his head. “No one’s telling you to be. We could’ve watched a movie,” he suggested, grinning. “Or gone on a shopping spree, or went on a drive. You don’t have to do anything for anyone else, especially on your birthday.”

“I like parties when you’re there—and no one else is,” you laughed as Jack scoffed, a smile pulling at his lips.

“I like those parties, too.” He went silent for a minute, just the hum of music playing from the outside filling the room as you focused on his thumb on your thigh. “I know I’ve been busy with hockey and everything lately, but I don’t want you to ever feel like you’re not important to me, or that I’m not thinking about you, because I am—all the time. You’re the most important person in my life.”

Your heart swelled at his words as you squeezed his hand. “I know, J,” you nodded. “I knew what I was getting into when you asked me out,” you smiled, meeting his gaze. 

He had been busy with his rookie season for the past year: being called a bust, getting injured over and over again, fans questioning if the Devils made the correct choice with him. He grew quiet during those months, more frustrated—with himself, with his game, with the people around him. You were worried for him, begging him to just talk to you about it. He shielded himself from everything and everyone. He almost lost you because of it, and he vowed to never do that shit ever again; to never get so close to losing himself that he ends up losing you.

He took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours. “You’re really fuckin’ cool, you know that?”

You rolled your eyes, that smile planted on your lips never fading away. “I know.”

Laughing, he smiled, a small, genuine smile that made your heart skip a beat. He pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around you in a warm embrace. “I mean it. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

You buried your face in Jack’s chest, breathing in the familiar scent of seasalt and ocean breeze. “Luckily for you, you’ll never have to find out.”

He kissed the top of your head, his chin resting on your hair as your cheek laid against his chest. “I love you,” he whispered, the words spilling out before he could stop them.

He felt you tense beneath him, pulling back slightly. His heart sped up. “What?”

He gulped before breathing in. “I love you,” he repeated, his voice steadier this time. “I think I’ve always been in love with you—you make it hard not to be.”

Your breath caught, a small smile encapsulating your blushy face. “I love you, too.”

Before you could say anything else, Jack closed the distance between the two of you, his lips capturing yours in a tender kiss. The music was gone, the thumping of your heartbeat was put to the back of your mind, every doubt and every worry you had for this relationship was dissipated immediately—nothing existed at this moment. It was jack, jack, jack, plus a hundred times more.

Jack’s hands found their way to your waist, pulling you closer, deepening the kiss. You responded naturally, your fingers threading through his hair, holding him close as if afraid he might disappear, like this moment was just a figment of your imagination. 

Gently, Jack guided you higher up the bed, his movements careful and deliberate. He laid you down, hovering over you, his eyes filled with adoration. “I love you so much,” he whispered against your lips before capturing them in another kiss.

Your hands roamed his back as you tugged at his shirt, eager to feel his skin against yours. Jack immediately understood, pulling away just long enough to discard his striped tee before returning to you, his kisses growing more urgent. 

As you pulled him closer, your own shirt joined his on the floor, your lacy red bra standing out against your skin. Jack’s breath hitched at the sight, his hands trembling as they traced the contours of your body, committing every inch and every curve to memory. He wanted to explore every dimple and every mole, every birthmark, and every faint touch that made you squirm. He wanted to know you, as thoroughly as possible.

“Holy shit,” he murmured breathlessly, praising you to the highest level. “You’re so fucking beautiful.”

Jack’s lips left a trail of kisses down your neck, his breath hot against your skin. He paused, his gaze meeting yours, a silent question in his eyes. He wouldn’t do anything unless you wanted to. You answered with a nod, your fingers tracing the lines of his jaw before pulling him back to you. 

“I love you, Jack,” you whispered against his lips. “I want this.”

Jack’s hands moved with increasing urgency, his touch sending shivers down your spine. Roaming lower, they explored the curve of your waist before slipping beneath the waistband of your pants. His fingers found their way to your core, gently exploring, teasing.

A soft moan escaped your lips, your body arching against his touch. “Jack,” you breathed.

He kissed you deeply, his fingers moving with deliberate, tender motions, drawing soft gasps and breathless moans. “I love you…so much,” he murmured against your lips.

Your breaths became ragged, his name becoming the only thing left in your vocabulary. The room grew warmer, more intoxicating. Jack felt you getting closer to your high, quickly removing his fingers before you could reach it as you whined out, breathless.

He paused, his forehead resting against yours, his breath hot and heavy. “Are you sure you want this?” he asked again.

You nodded, your eyes locked with his. “I’m sure, Jack. I want you.”

With a shuddering breath, he captured your lips again, the kiss deep and all-consuming. His hands found the clasp of your bra, unhooking it, and letting it fall away. He stared at you for a moment, taking in your bare body before his lips began to trail downwards, worshiping every inch of you.

Your hands found the waistband of his pants, your hands working sloppily as you fumbled with the button. Paying no mind, he helped you, discarding his pants and boxers in one swift motion. Jack’s body pressed against yours, the heat of his skin against yours almost too much to bear. His kisses were everywhere, trailing down your neck, across your collarbone, and finally to your breasts, where he lingered, drawing soft moans from your lips.

You arched against him, your body pleading for more, for everything. "Jack, please," you whispered, your voice barely more than a breath.

He met your eyes, his gaze soft and safe. "I love you," he said again, his voice full of emotion. "Let me show you how much."

With that, he kissed you deeply, his body aligning with yours. The moment he entered you, it was like everything else fell away, leaving only the two of you, connected in the most intimate way possible. The rhythm of your movements, the gasps and moans, all blended perfectly, like this was right where you were supposed to be—with Jack, here, and in love.

His thrusts were slow at first, measured, each one driving you closer to the edge. The feeling of him inside you, filling you completely, was overwhelming. You wrapped your legs around his waist, urging him to go deeper.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” he repeated against your lips, over and over again. 

Jack’s thrust became more urgent, his breathing ragged, matching your own. His heavy grunts, as your fingers dug into his back pulling him closer, closer, impossibly closer, filled the warm room. 

As your climax built, your hands weaved through his hair, needing to feel him, needing to be as close as humanly possible. Each thrust hit harder and faster than the last, bringing you closer to the edge. 

“Jack,” you cried out, your body tensing as that unfamiliar feeling approached, the high almost too much to handle.

His face was buried in your neck, holding you tightly. “Y/N,” he groaned, pushing you through your high, his own release nearly there.

With a final thrust, the string you held onto so tightly, slipped from your fingers, a balloon inside you erupting at the feeling. You cried out his name once more, your body trembling with the force of your release. Jack followed, his own climax crashing over him. 

You clung to each other, your bodies trembling with aftershocks. Jack held you against his chest, his breath ragged, and his heart pounding against yours.

As you laid entwined, the world slowly came back into focus. The sounds of the party were distant now, a faint reminder of where you were. But at that moment, it didn’t matter. You didn’t care about what was going on downstairs, who was missing you, or who was asking for Jack. All that mattered right now was the two of you, and it felt perfect.

“Don’t know if I said it enough, but I love you,” Jack chuckled, his arm wrapped around your small frame.

You smiled, your fingers tracing lazy patterns on his skin. “I love you, too, J. Always.”

Always.

  Always.

    Always.

      Always.

         Always.

Opening his eyes, Jack watched the crowd around him, his gaze instinctively searching for you. He didn’t know why he was doing it. There was no point—not anymore, not when he fucked everything up. Not when he let you slip from his fingers and leave his life entirely.

His eyes settled on a girl in the corner of the room, a red solo cup in hand, her cheeks a flushed mess, and he wondered why he was even at that party. None of these girls could hold a candle to you, not even if they tried. 

Yet Jack watched the door, and willed for you to come, despite knowing you don’t go to parties anymore.

[sundrop-writes]

Heaven's Gate

Daryl Dixon x Gender Neutral Reader

If there were any more left of me - I'd give it to you.

Summary:

Hope. Not the fragile, delicate thing that everyone mistakes it to be.

Hope is stubborn, and grows inside of you long before you ever realize its purpose there.

Hope can't be crushed by a thousand pound tank or torn apart as easily as concrete walls can. Hope is balanced on the backs of songbirds, it whistles quietly in the wind, and it brings you right where you need to be (even if you don't know it).

Daryl Dixon x GN!Reader. Strangers to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Fluff. Set during Seasons 1-5.

Word Count: 24,200

The Walking Dead Masterlist | AO3 Link

Detailed warnings and author's notes below the cut.

...

Warnings: the reader character in this fic is completely gender neutral - there is no mentions of the reader's genitals, their clothing style, or their general appearance, and I did not use any gendered terms to refer to the reader whatsoever; a few times the term 'they' is used in conversation, but I tried to be clever and make it so that it could be referring to just the reader or the whole group, interpret it how you want; it is possibly implied that the reader is younger than Daryl, but it's never explicitly stated (when I was writing, this I had in mind that they do have an age gap but I didn't want to state so to leave it more open-ended) - the main focus is the reader being less experienced with survival skills and more 'citified', which is the case for a lot of the characters at the beginning of the apocalypse; there is a lot of TWD themes in the fic - death; canon typical violence, hunting and killing animals for food, killing other humans in order to survive, killing walkers, gun violence, mentions of food scarcity, the general emotional depression that comes with being surrounded by death and being on the brink of survival, mentions of Merle being racist and sexist (the fic does not contain him saying any slurs or performing any actions in alignment with this, it is a background element); there is mentions of canon plot points and this fic will spoil Seasons 2 through 5 if you are watching the show for the first time and haven't seen those episodes yet (I am looking at you, Star), mentions of 'fate' and 'good luck' as concepts; bird symbolism (that may not be accurate to the general recordings of these symbols and are just things I have learned from my personal life), mentions of religion - mentions of the reader praying to 'any god that will listen' (the reader is not religious to one specific religion, but believes in prayer) (yes all of the spiritual concepts in this fic come from my personal life lmao); mentions of canon injuries - Daryl being shot with his own crossbow and then being shot in the ear by Andrea; mentions of stitches for medical purposes; use of the term Y/N (I am nothing if not a traditionalist); mentions of alcohol/characters drinking (Beth and Daryl at the moonshine shack) - implications of genetic alcoholism and how it plays into Beth and Daryl's interactions with alcohol; passing mentions of Daryl smoking cigarettes; mentions of Daryl's abusive past (non-detailed); Daryl describes the reader as 'beautiful' in his personal narration; mention of reader having an abusive father (a father who is 'similar to Ed') (this is not described in detail); mentions of suicide (performed by a non-named character not during the time of the story) (also mentions of Daryl having suicidal ideations due to hopelessness when the prison falls); mentions of taking things off of dead bodies because those things are useful for survival; I think that's it.

A/N: I re-wrote the summary like four times cause I actually have no clue how to summarize the essence of the fic. But I hope this fits well. This is way more about the emotions than it is about what's actually happening in the fic. I am really proud of this fic and I hope that you guys like it.

...

Daryl Dixon was someone who came into your life quietly. 

When that original group first made camp at the quarry around Dale’s old RV outside of Atlanta, trying to escape the epic traffic jam and the chilling after effects of the hellish bombs that had been dropped on the city, everyone thought that it would only be temporary. Everyone thought that it would last a few days, at most. Everyone held onto the comforting delusion that it wouldn’t be long until the world got back up on its feet again. 

You certainly never thought that all of the people within that camp would become a second family to you - people you would die for, kill for if needed. 

When you first saw Daryl, he was trying to hold back his drunken brother Merle from getting into a fight with Shane. You didn’t think much of him then - perhaps you wondered why he stood up for someone so sour and surly, but you knew that the loyalty of blood related family meant too much to some people. That he was likely willing to do far too much for someone who would never return the same favors for him. (And you turned out to be right.) 

These days, you thought of Daryl Dixon with increasing frequency and a mixed bag of emotions that you struggled to carry. Bitter nostalgia being at the top of that list. 

When you woke up on this particular morning, you thought of him as you gathered your hunting gear. You heard his quiet, gravelly voice in your ear telling you to travel light, but reminding you that the items you should take would each be important and serve a planned purpose. The knife on your belt was heavy with memories of him, ached with the ghost of his touch. 

You thought of him as you tracked a buck’s steps through the dirt. You thought of him as you crept through the woods, feeling equal parts peaceful and dangerously pensive. You thought of him that night as you sat beside a gently crackling fire, the flames warming you only beside he had taught you how to start one. You thought of him as you eventually took down the deer - as you skinned it, gutted it, and portioned  exactly how he had taught you. 

Stepping under a stream of hot water after three long days out in the woods was one of the most satisfying feelings you could have ever conceptualized. The bottom of the tub quickly became muddy with a combination of blood rinsing off your skin (from when you had cleaned the deer), and the general dirt you had gathered on you from the hunting trip. You let the heat of the water relax your tired muscles, and tried your hardest not to let your mind wander back to something you couldn’t have. 

But you missed Daryl so damn much. 

It was strange to think that things had been so different not that long ago. 

… 

The quarry was an oddly beautiful place to be during one of the darkest times in your life. 

It was the definition of breathtaking - crystal blue waters, bright green grass, nothing but open space to let the sun shine down on you. None of that city stink from the piled-up, rotting corpses. This far away from Atlanta, it was easy to forget why you were all gathered here, camping out night after night. It was easy to forget that this was about survival and it wasn’t a simple summer vacation. 

Well, it was easy to forget when you weren’t actively staring down that city full of corpses. Which is something that you tried your best to do - forget. You tried to focus on the task in front of you, tried not to let yourself get too bogged down with dread at the idea of the end of the world. 

You knew that the others likely would have called you foolish because of it. But you had to keep your head up in order to keep going. It was how you survived. 

Currently, you were playing a game with the kids - a makeshift game of kickball with an inflatable beach ball that you had gotten for them during your last trip into the city. You were one of the only people that Glenn trusted to go with him. Mainly because you had lived in the city before everything had ‘gone to shit’ - before the bombs. So you knew it well, and you could have his back. 

When Carl accidentally kicked the ball past you, you rushed to get it, and you became slightly hesitant when you saw that it had landed at the feet of Daryl Dixon. He was in deep concentration, gutting and cleaning one of the many squirrels that he had recently caught, his fingers stained red with blood. You had never seen animal butchery in person before, and it did make you slightly squeamish. You had only spoken to him a handful of times, most of those conversations less than four words each, and he was one of the only people in the camp that you were still slightly weary of. 

His generally stoic nature and his brother - his mouthy, racist, sexist asshole of a brother - didn’t exactly make him approachable or friendly. Though you weren’t exactly sure if Daryl agreed with everything that his brother did and said, or if he just stood by the man because he was family. You still took caution, approaching him like you would approach a supposedly tame bear. Very carefully. 

“Sorry,” You quickly apologized for possibly disturbing him as you rushed to grab the ball, and he spared you only a harsh sideways glance as you picked it up. 

“Ain’t nothin’.” He shrugged, his words coming out as they always did, in a quiet grunt. 

Feeling an awkward lull come over you as his intrusive gaze continued to stare you down, you felt more words form in your mouth and spew out your lips before you could stop them. 

“I was just playing kickball with the kids,” You quickly explained, gesturing to the small grassy area about ten feet behind you where Carl and Sophia were standing, waiting for you. 

Daryl’s eyes strayed curiously there, clearly listening, and you continued. 

“I got them this ball when I went on that run with Glenn. And some other things, too. Coloring books, stickers, fake tattoos. Sophia insisted that I needed one,” You chuckled awkwardly, sticking out your hand to show Daryl the glittery blue tattoo of a butterfly that Sophia had put on you. 

He grunted, nodding in reply. 

You weren’t expecting him to speak any further, and it surprised you when he did. 

“‘s good.” He mumbled. “Makes ‘em happy.” 

In the back of his mind, he considered adding on some sentiment about ‘kids being kids’, getting to have fun during such a dark time - but he stopped short. He didn’t want to annoy you with the conversation that you were clearly only partaking in out of social nicety. Politeness that a world falling apart no longer needed. 

You nodded, flashing him a smile. “Yeah.” 

“Come on! Bring the ball back!” Carl shouted, distracting you from the interaction, causing you to walk away without another word. 

Daryl watched you playing with the kids for a few moments - laughing and running around with them, somehow so carefree in a world that was determined to fall apart. He wondered if you had always been like this, or if being around kids just brought that out in you. He wasn’t sure which reason made you better in his eyes - and he certainly wasn’t sure why he thought about it for so long. 

Why he thought about you for so long. 

He had to shake himself back to reality and go back to cleaning his kills. 

…

“Daryl!” 

You called out his name as you jogged up toward the stables, and he stopped in his tracks, waiting for you to catch up with him. 

“Daryl, hey.” You greeted him with a small smile. “Rick told me you’d be up here.” 

He grunted in reply. “Yeah. ‘m gonna take a horse out. Make better ground t’ look for the girl.” 

Your stomach clenched at him mentioning Sophia. 

The group was supposed to be headed out towards Fort Benning - supposed to be finding refuge at the hopefully safe military base. Instead, you were all setting up camp at the very reluctant Hershel Greene’s farm, not straying too far from where you had lost one of your own in the hopes of finding her. 

But that was why you had come to talk to Daryl in the first place. 

Sophia had become like a sister to you in the few short months that you had known her. And though everyone else kept telling you it was deeply unlikely, you were hopeful that she was alive - that she would be found. And you did believe that Daryl would be the one to find her. 

“How’s the trail?” You asked. “Do you think you know which way she headed? You - you can be honest with me.” 

You hesitated on the last part. But you did want his honesty more than anything. You knew that he was never one to sugar-coat things. Even if you hadn’t told him that, he would give you the truth. 

“Trail’s a little muddy.” He said, doling out that honesty. “‘m gon follow the river. It’s her biggest landmark out there, so she’ll probably be somewhere round it.” 

You smiled at him. And then, you remembered - 

“I brought you something.” You noted, reaching for the back pocket of your jeans. 

Daryl watched with quiet curiosity as you pulled out a piece of paper - when you showed it to him, he quickly realized that it was a half-used set of stickers. 

“These are some of the stickers that I got for Sophia,” You explained. “My mom always used to tell me that cardinals are good luck.” 

You peeled off a sticker of a bright red bird with a pointed head and a black pattern that resembled an eye mask - as much of a nature man as he was, Daryl was never one for bird watching. He didn’t care about identifying certain species of birds unless he could shoot and eat them. But he quickly reasoned that this must be the cardinal that you spoke of. 

“Give me your bow.” You said, shoving the rest of the sticker sheet into your back pocket again and holding out your hand expectantly. 

“I don’t need no luck.” He replied, voice full of snark. 

In a sense, he thought it was… sweet. You were trying to share some of that brightness with him that the kids got every single day. But he didn’t need you marking up his crossbow with a dumb little sticker. Especially because once Sophia was found, you wouldn’t give a shit to talk to him or be around him any more. 

“Just give it.” You replied - equally snarky, equally stubborn. 

Daryl sighed and tugged his bow’s strap over his head, presenting it to you. You placed the sticker on the bow’s handle, in one of the places where it wasn’t as worn down from him holding it. 

“There,” You said, giving it back to him with a smile. “Now you’re all set.” 

It was more for you than it was for him - a token of good faith and protection. The idea that you could do something to bring Sophia home when you felt so powerless. 

Daryl let out a harsh sound - somewhere between a laugh and a sarcastic snort as he walked away. “Thanks.” 

“You’re welcome,” You replied brightly, edging into a sarcasm of your own. 

He resisted the urge to flip you off, believing that you were too sensitive to take it as a joke. 

You watched him off for a while, seeing him disappear into the stables before you left to do your own chores. As you scrubbed at laundry, you sent a prayer to every god you could think of that your new little sister would be found alive. 

… 

Daryl felt like a dumbass. 

When Daryl was laying on the harsh, rocky ground after the horse had thrown him, with one of his own arrows digging into his side - he wanted to laugh at the fact that you had supposedly ‘blessed’ his bow with ‘good luck’. He had owned and used the bow for years previous, and not once had he ever been injured by it. You had it in your hands for all five seconds, and now - he had been thrown off a horse and shot by the damn thing. It was the definition of irony. 

While he laid on the ground, struggling for breath, bleeding from his wound, drifting in and out of consciousness - he spotted a flash of bright red above him. 

He managed to pry his eyes open long enough to properly focus on it, and - 

It was your damn bird. 

A bright red cardinal had landed in one of the trees above him, staring down at him in a seemingly taunting manner. 

‘My mom always used to tell me that cardinals are good luck.’ 

“Good… good luck… my ass.” Daryl huffed out, still spiteful even if he was exhausted and losing blood. Even if no one else was around to hear this verbal jab. 

His head lulled to the side, and before his eyes could drift closed as he truly succumbed to the blood loss, he spotted something else - a bright floral fabric, and some strings of yarn that definitely didn’t belong in the muddy creek bed. Once again, he forced himself to focus on it, pushing through the heaviness that threatened to overtake him. He realized in a heart-jolting moment that he had seen the object before. 

It was Sophia’s doll. 

He turned back to where the bird was still sitting on that branch above him. 

“Any… any chance you can lead me to the girl?” 

Perhaps it was the dizziness of his injury talking, but he could have sworn that the bird tiled its head at him - as though quizzically asking: ‘what girl?’

It was the spite that kept him conscious, the idea that he would get to laugh in your face when he got back and tell you how unlucky your ‘blessing’ had been. But it was his desire to find Sophia and bring her home that truly got him up on his feet again. 

… 

Your bird didn’t lead him to Sophia, but it did get him back to the farm before he completely collapsed from his injury - even if he was greeted by a bullet from Andrea, believing he was a Walker. 

Because of that bullet sharply colliding with his head, he didn’t remember to tell you about that bird finding him laying in the creek bed until much later. It didn’t come back to mind until the group had truly settled into the prison, after welcoming in the people from Woodbury when the ‘war’ with the Governor was seemingly over. He only thought about it that night when the two of you were up late on watch because he had seen another cardinal on one of his runs that day, and he was telling you how much the damn bird had annoyed him. 

Daryl wasn’t someone who believed in luck, but he knew that the story would entertain you nonetheless. And it did. 

In fact, it entertained you so much that it caused you to plant a confident hand on his shoulder and lean in for a kiss - sealing your mouth against his, trapping any noises of surprise in his throat as he stood frozen, pinned against the guard rail. 

He only truly had time to take in what had happened - to process that sweet, perfect kiss after you had chirped a ‘goodnight’ to him and left. You mentioned something about going on a morning run with Glenn and Sasha to scope out a place with more supplies, but his ears were still beating with blood and he barely heard you. 

He had to get used to it then - being yours. But he found that even though the hand-holding and the hugging could be a bit embarrassing at times - he liked it. He liked having someone taking care of him as much as he tried to take care of others. And though it was something he had desperately tried to deny because of your stubbornness and your sharp tongue - he liked you. He was beginning to love you in that dangerous way that was going to get him hurt. 

But he would deny that. And he would do anything to stop that from happening. 

And that was one of the most dangerous parts about it. 

… 

It wasn’t just you that he was willing to die in order to protect. Daryl had gotten dangerously attached to life at the prison. For the first time in his life, he felt as though he had a home. Family, friends. As soon as Hershel told them about the veterinary college, about a place where there might be medicine to combat this strange flu that had suddenly struck his home and the people in it - he knew he had to get a group together. 

Before he went outside to get the car ready, and make sure he had all the equipment inside it, he stopped by your cell. It would be rude not to say goodbye. 

His stomach dropped when he heard coughing. 

“Y/N-” He spoke your name in that alarming tone, concern so ripe in the single word as he pulled aside the curtain you had hung across your door for privacy. 

You cut him off before he could say anymore. 

“I know.” You said, your voice annoyed and slightly strained from the illness clearly running through your body. “I need to go into Cellblock A for quarantine. I’m - I’m on my way there now. I’m just gathering up some stuff. My sketchbook and some novels. I’m guessing it’ll be boring as shit in there,” 

Daryl nodded, and moved to step into your cell, wanting to place his hand on your forehead to check you for a fever. He wanted to know how bad it was - how much time he had to get back with the medicine. 

“Don’t come any closer.” You said abruptly, raising your hand to keep him back. “I don’t - don’t wanna get you sick too.” 

Hesitantly, he stayed where he was. 

He knew that you were right, and he knew that it was weak of him - but he found himself craving the affection that he previously found annoying. He had been hoping that you would hug him before he left. 

“‘m goin’ on a run.” He said. “Hershel told us ‘bout this old veterinary college - he said there’s medicine that could help.” 

“Medicine for dogs?” You heaved out a laugh, strained and full of crud in your lungs, collapsing to sit on the edge of your bunk. 

Daryl shrugged. 

“Apparently it’s the same as medicine for people.” Then, after a moment of you staring at him with uncertainty, he added on: “He gave us a list.” He assured you, patting his breast pocket, where that list was currently sitting. 

You nodded. Naturally, you trusted Daryl. You had to, after everything you had been through together. 

Then, you turned to the bag that you had been packing up and took out a sketchbook that looked familiar to Daryl - one that he often saw you doodling in. You flicked through a few of the pages and then ripped one out, presenting it to him with an extended arm. You covered your mouth and nose with your shirt, seemingly for the assurance that you wouldn’t breathe on him so that he could come and fetch this from you. 

He took one step closer and grabbed the paper, and you coughed into your shirt as he stepped back and inspected the drawing. He wasn’t surprised to see that it was a beautifully drawn sketch of a cardinal - shaded red with what he guessed were smudges of lipstick. He was almost sure that you had picked it up at one of the houses the group had stayed in during the long winter after they had to abandon the Greene farm. 

“For - for luck.” You told him between more coughs, letting your shirt down to smile at him. 

He knew by now not to attempt rejecting the symbol. He wouldn’t say that he believed in it - but he believed in you. And he wanted to have you with him. So he folded it up and tucked it into the breast pocket of his shirt, right next to the list that Hershel had given him. 

“You’re a fool.” He griped, half-winded, only half meaning it. 

You smiled brightly at him, your face clearly tired from feeling so ill. 

“You love me.” You replied with utter certainty. 

He rolled his eyes. He didn’t want to point out that this was a growing problem. That it would pull his focus during the run for the medicine - that he would be distracted thinking about getting home and getting that medicine to you. 

“Now go on and get,” He told you, motioning toward Cellblock A. 

You gathered your things and got up, making a wide berth around Daryl as you walked down the stairs. 

“And I don’t wanna hear nothin’ about you bein’ heroic neither.” He called after you, shouting at your back. “You’re gonna go in there n get your ass t’ bed, ya hear me?” 

You knew it was his way of caring - wanting you to rest when you were sick. 

You turned back and gave him a big smile and blew him a kiss - something he often remarked upon as being ‘childish’. He hated that it caused a flutter in his stomach, and he couldn’t help that his form of affection in return was to flip you off. You loved it just as much. 

… 

That was the last time you spoke to him before the prison fell. But it wasn’t the last time that he spoke to you. 

When he got back, you were unconscious - you had to be bagged by Hershel to help you breathe, and the medicine helped you survive. Just barely. Daryl held your hand and begged you to live, and eventually he had to be distracted away from your unconscious body by Maggie so that he wouldn’t simply sit there the whole time and mourn. She reminded him that they all had jobs to do, and he made a few rounds of the prison, busying himself with chores to help everyone else get by so that he wouldn’t drive himself insane at your bedside. 

And that’s what he had been doing when the Governor rolled up with a thousand pound tank and shot their walls down. 

He knew that his love for you would come back to bite him in the ass one day. 

…

Daryl got out with Beth. 

He almost couldn’t stand her bright, big eyes staring at him, waiting for answers - her chirpy little voice, prodding at him, demanding that they ‘follow the trail’, telling him that they needed to go look for everyone else. Telling him that he was a tracker, that he could find them. As if it was his damn responsibility just because he had the skills to get it done. 

It was all too reminiscent of you, telling him that he could find Sophia. That it was a ‘when’, not an ‘if’. All too hopeful, all too damn certain. 

Perhaps that was what got him off his ass and doing what he did best - reading the dirt. 

“What’re you doin’?” He asked, staring at the girl curiously as she went to one of the bushes and rushed to pick berries from branches. Had she not gotten enough to eat that morning? 

“They’ll be hungry when we find them.” Beth told him confidently. 

Of course. That undefeatable streak of optimism. 

Daryl knew that blueberries weren’t your favorite - but he should have something to give you. He would be too busy tracking the footprints to properly hunt for squirrels or rabbits and clean them for you. So, he found himself pulling a large bandana from his back pocket and offering it to Beth - something to hold the berries in to keep them safe as an offering for you. 

“Here.” He grunted at her. 

Beth smiled at him. 

It was one of the last smiles she gave him for a long time. 

When they came across those bodies splayed out beside the tracks - any sense of hope was crushed inside of him. The picture you had gifted him was heavy inside his breast pocket, and he hated that tears threatened his eyes - even if he carefully looked them over to confirm it, and he knew that none of those bodies belonged to you. There was no trace of you there. 

It was just a cold reminder that even if the others had gotten out of the prison, they could be dead. They likely were dead. 

The days started to blur into each other, and Daryl couldn’t get you off his mind. 

One hazy evening, as he and Beth both stared into the fire with dead looks on their faces, he took the drawing out of his pocket and unfolded it. 

For good luck. 

He didn’t believe in luck - because it didn’t exist. The world was fucked. Nobody was lucky. You and your good luck were dead. 

He tossed the drawing into the fire, ready to burn it up along with anything he had ever felt for you. Only a moment later, when the corner of it had barely caught, just barely turning black, Beth snatched it out. She stomped on it with her boot, successfully saving it. 

“Don’t do that.” She hissed at him. 

Daryl snatched it from her, and crumbled it up, tossing it aside. He let out a harsh grunt, but refused to look at her. 

“That was from Y/N, wasn’t it?” She posed. 

He could feel her imposing stare as she waited for an answer. 

He didn’t give her one. 

Just because they had an unspoken agreement to help keep each other alive didn’t mean that he had to participate in stupid conversations with her. 

“You can’t burn up the past. You can’t burn your love for people just because you think they’re dead.” Beth sighed, tired and defiant. “You can’t burn up memories. We’re gonna find them. Y/N, and Maggie, and Michonne, and - and everyone. We’re all gonna be together again.” 

Daryl scoffed. “Yeah. Cause that’s gon’ happen.” 

Beth rolled her eyes, but didn’t speak any further on the subject. 

After she had fallen asleep - when the fire was dull, Daryl picked up the crumbled ball and smoothed it out again. The charred corner hadn’t even touched your bird. He felt like a fool doing it, just as much of a fool as he accused you of being, but he folded it neatly - well, as neatly as he could. And then put it back into his breast pocket again. 

But that was the thing - Daryl wished that he could. He wished he could burn up those memories. He wished that Beth was wrong. 

He wished that you would stop haunting him. Then he wouldn’t have to feel like this anymore. 

… 

When Daryl sat up in camp that night with his back to the trunk of a tree, he did not intend to fall asleep. He honestly did not think he was capable of doing so - even with the exhaustion so deep in his bones, he was used to going without sleep. He was used to trudging on much like the Walkers shambling around them - upright, puffing shallow breaths, but barely there, barely conscious. These days, he felt as though sleep was a luxury. 

As the fire died down, Beth turned over with her back to him, curling an elbow under her head, the only thing separating her from the dirt. She no longer bothered with the mockering of grunting out ‘night’ as an acknowledgement that she was trying to go to sleep (because she stopped saying ‘goodnight’, long ago, even at the prison, because those were few and far between). 

Daryl supposed that he was staying up to keep watch. They did have the cans and spare car parts scattered around on lines to make noise if any stray Walkers wandered near their camp. He knew that he slept light, and this would be more than enough noise to wake him if he did fall asleep. 

With his eyes locked on her back, he wondered if Beth slept at all these days, or if she simply laid down to fake it. Maybe so that she wouldn’t have to look at him anymore, even for a few hours. Sometimes, he would notice the grip on her knife beside her head go a bit laxer, and believe that this was a true sign that she had actually managed to drift into unconsciousness. Still, even if she wasn’t sleeping, he should keep watch. 

Daryl hadn’t intended to fall asleep. 

Daryl’s consciousness was jolted suddenly - his entire existence shaken by the feeling of someone - something grabbing his legs. When he looked down, he saw the blur of a snarling Walker crawling up his body. He panicked, his heart thudding hard inside his chest. Naturally, he reached for his crossbow beside him - grabbing, hands shaking, grasping at air. 

It was gone. It wasn’t there. What the hell? 

One of the cold hands grabbed his shirt, forcing him to look back down the length of his own body at the beast. When its head snapped up toward him, he was filled with a colder kind of shock. 

It was you. 

Though your once beautiful features had been tainted with rot, yellowing teeth, and your laughter filled eyes had turned sour and rotted like putrid eggs - he absolutely recognized that this was you. 

He sucked more gasping breaths, and reached for the knife on his belt, but - that was gone too. 

Then, somehow - you let out a dark, harrowing laugh. A laugh that shook everything he was, that somehow managed to echo through the trees and rattled the ground underneath him. An utter mockery of his entire existence. 

“This is all your fault, Daryl.” You spewed, your rotting mouth spilling out horrible, black blood. “You did this to me!” 

Then, in an utterly horrifying moment, you reached down and tore into him - your weak, dead hands easily ripping into his abdomen, and before his very eyes, you ripped out his guts so that you could consume him like a perfect, bloody feast. Just as you had in life, you dined on parts of him that he would never get back, stole his life force with no consideration as to how he would ever get it back. 

You didn’t care how he would survive without you. 

Daryl awoke with a start - the sound of the cans clanking at the edge of their small campsite forcing him back to reality with a harsh jolt. 

His fingers wrapped around his crossbow where it was seated between his knees within seconds. Before his sleep-sticky eyes were even fully open, he had the loaded end pointed at the source of the sound - a tired, messy-haired Beth, who was wandering back into camp with her hands full of something. 

“Told you not to go wonderin’ off.” Daryl barked at her easily, hating how his heart thumped in his chest with residual ‘fight or flight’ instincts, even though he knew that she was of no true threat to him - still partially spooked from the horrible dream that he would never tell anybody about, ever. 

He slumped back against the tree, keeping a careful eye on her as she came back to her place beside him, already spouting her surly argument against him. 

“I saw some berry bushes over there.” She whined quietly. “Daddy taught me what’s safe and-” 

“Don’t matter.” Daryl grunted in return, hating that he felt a sensitive pang inside of him at the mention of Hershel. “I told you: don’t go nowhere without me.” 

Beth let out a sharp sigh. “You’re such an asshole.” 

He was. 

Nonetheless, she silently slid some of the berries his way, carefully contained on the bandana that he had given her before for such berry-picking purposes - and nonetheless, he ate them. 

Later that day, when he was prowling the woods with Beth at his back, hoping to score something a bit more substantial for dinner - his eyes landed on the faded splotch of the cardinal sticker that you had put on his crossbow during his time spent looking for Sophia. His thumb traced it idly, and he knew that Beth was dying to ask about it, but held back. 

He knew then that he would never be able to escape your ghost. 

… 

Daryl wished that he could burn up the memories. He wished that you would get the hell out of his head. That if you were dead, every last trace of you would just die. 

He couldn’t stop thinking about the last time he had seen you - back in A block, after he had brought back the medicine. 

… 

He thought it was a victory - getting the meds back to the prison. He thought that it was simple. If he got to the veterinary college, got the meds that they needed, got the run group back in one piece - he thought it would be a win. He knew you. You were a fighter. You would hold on long enough for him to get back. He had to do all the guesswork. He had to keep everyone going on the road. 

If anything, he knew that you would be doing the exact opposite of what he had told you - you would be up and about, shuffling through the makeshift ward, feeding the people the hope that you grew and doled out so well. That was your job. He just had to do his. 

Maybe it was that stupid, foolish hope infecting him like the illness had infected you - but he truly thought that getting the medication and getting back would be the only complicated part. 

“Hey, Doc, how we doin’ in here?” Daryl asked, stepping to lean against the mouth of the cell that you had taken up temporary residence in.  

Of course, he was calling Hershel ‘doc’ with a joking air. The man loved to tell everyone now that he wasn’t actually a doctor - but few actually listened. They trusted his experience and the way he spoke with wise authority more than anything. 

Hershel used a stethoscope to listen to your lungs, and then looked up at Daryl, his face firm and unreadable. Daryl didn’t like it - but he was still being strung along like a fish on a hook by that foolish, bitter hope. 

“Y/N is doing a lot better than before.” He said, placing a gentle hand on your forehead, checking your temperature. “The meds have helped to take down the fever.” 

Daryl nodded. “Tha’s good.” 

Hershel gave him a serious look. “I like you a lot, Daryl. So I don’t intend to lie to you.” 

Daryl’s stomach clenched up - grabbed by a fist of nerves. 

You were alive. You were breathing - Daryl confirmed this, locking his eyes on the gentle up and down puff of your chest. What else could possibly be wrong? 

“Our friend here is showing remarkable signs of improvement, as is everyone who received the medication that you brought back. You have done a mighty service to these people, Daryl.”

Daryl knew this wasn’t simple praise for the work he had done. This was the sunshine before the storm - it was an omen. He could feel the ‘but’ coming before Hershel spoke it. 

“But,” 

Of course. There it was. 

“-I have to warn you.” Hershel sighed. “We had to perform CPR on Y/N for an extended period of time.” 

Daryl’s eyes cast over your face, fixated on your peaceful, unconscious form. His ears became fuzzy, filled with blood, and he could hardly focus on more of the older man’s words as he explained your condition. Explained how you had been deprived of oxygen for a few minutes - how you were at risk of brain death, and Hershel had no way of knowing what the state of your brain activity was without the proper equipment. If your brain wasn’t active enough, you would never wake up again. 

All they could do now was to sit and wait for you to wake up. If you were going to wake up at all. 

Hershel left Daryl alone with you, and he perched himself on the edge of your bed, his ass shuffled in tightly by the edge of your hip, struggling to find purchase on the edge of the small bunk. It was much like you had done to him after he had been haphazardly shot by Andrea. He took your hand in his, his eyes still focused on your unconscious face - at least you looked peaceful. 

With a large knot forming in his throat, he attempted to speak. 

Even though he was unsure if you could hear him - he couldn’t contain what he had to say. 

“You’re an asshole.” He mumbled out. Part of him was expecting to get a reaction out of you. To mock you into waking up. “I went through all that damn trouble to get those meds, and you gone n croaked on me while I was gone?” 

Your face didn’t even flinch. 

You were so damn still. 

For the first time since he had met you - not laughing, not smiling, not loudly voicing your chirpy, hopeful sentiments. So still. 

“Nah, that’s bullshit.” He growled out, his voice growing louder as his frustration grew inside of him - as he became more determined to wake you. “You’re gonna wake up. Wake up!” He shouted, his words echoing painfully off the walls. 

In the next cell over, Maggie heard this and became distracted from dabbing a wet cloth against Glenn’s forehead. He was still drifting in and out of consciousness, still too sick to fully take this in. But it caused Maggie to strain her ears, listening in on what happened next. 

“You’re gonna wake up. You’re gonna-” 

Daryl was startled when he found himself choking on his own words. He sucked in a sharp breath, and despite his best efforts, a sob rattled his chest, and a hot tear rolled down his face. 

“Why do I gotta to everythin’ around here? You set me off into the woods lookin’ for Sophia like it was my damn job. Make everythin’ my damn responsibility. I had to teach you everythin’. I had to teach you how to start a damn fire - what kind of simple asshole doesn’t know that?” 

He swallowed thickly. 

Truly, he wasn’t angry at you. 

It all came down to one thing. 

“Come on. Come - o-on. You know I can’t do this on my own.” He choked out, his face shrinking into a sob. “I can’t do this on my own.” 

He turned more toward you, laying himself down gently so that his face was pressed into your chest. He turned his head - laying his ear against your chest, listening carefully for your heart beat. It was there - thumping along steadily. 

Hershel had warned him that your breathing wasn’t the problem. Brain damage would keep you from waking up because your nervous system wouldn’t be active again. 

If you didn’t wake up, would you still turn into one of them? 

According to what Jenner had told them at the CDC, maybe not. 

Maybe you just be like this forever - stuck somewhere in the middle. Some hollow thing for Daryl to scream at that would never answer back. 

“You gotta wake up.” Daryl choked out. Knowing that only you would hear, he gathered up the bravery to speak out his next words. “I - I love you.” 

In the next cell over - Maggie heard all of it. She was holding Glenn’s hand, wondering what she would do if she were in Daryl’s shoes. She now had muddy tears in her eyes, listening to Daryl plead to you to wake up. Hearing Daryl - someone who had been so stony and tough in her eyes before - cry for the first time - it hit her hard. 

So it got her up; she kissed Glenn’s hand and told him that she would be back later, and he mumbled something incoherent back. 

“Daryl.” 

Maggie felt guilty when he jumped up - clearly alarmed by her presence at the opening of the cell, breaking his bubble of alone time with you. He began to frantically wipe at his face, obviously afraid to be vulnerable in front of her by showing his tears. After all that they had been through together - he still wasn’t willing to show this weakness in front of her. 

He only grunted in acknowledgment of her, staring hard at the floor instead of looking up at her. 

“These people need water. And they could probably use a good meal after all this.” Maggie told him. “I know you wanna stay with Y/N right now, but - come on, we all got jobs to do.” 

Daryl nodded. “Right. You’re right.” 

They did have jobs to do. But of course, the main reason she reminded him of the chores was to distract him. To keep him from going insane at your bedside, waiting for you to wake up. 

And that was the last he had seen of you before the Governor blasted a hole in A Block with the tank. 

…

When Daryl and Beth got to the moonshine shack, it truly came to a head. 

Daryl didn’t want to play the stupid game - he just wanted to drink in peace. He wanted to get shitfaced and hopefully pass out, actually. He wanted to have a good, booze-induced heavy sleep so that he could spend one night not plagued with spotty sleep and nightmares of your death - seeing your face painted in his mind as a nightmarish, growling dead thing. One night where he didn’t stay awake and stare at the back of Beth’s sleeping head because he couldn’t bear to close his own eyes. 

He didn’t want to play the game, but he did anyway. 

It got out of hand. 

Instead of trying to calm down, he rode the wave, leaning into the only existence he thought he knew - he turned back into the sputtering, bitter asshole that had once protected him so well. The hard shell that had kept him from getting his feelings hurt when the world had been cruel to him before. When Beth stabbed the Walker in the head, ending his game, he grew all too worried that she had figured him out - that she would try to get him to talk about his feelings. 

“What the hell did you do that for?” Daryl howled. “We was havin’ fun!” 

He knew it wasn’t true. Nothing about this was fun. 

“No, you were being a jackass!” Beth easily corrected him. 

She was far too much like you. Too direct. Never one to dance around the point instead of saying exactly what she meant. 

“If anyone found my dad-” 

Daryl was eager to cut off her additional reasoning, not wanting to think about it - he couldn’t add the mental image of a turned, dead-alive Hershel to his nightmare rotation as well. 

“Don’t!” He barked back, making her swallow up her words. “That ain’t remotely the same!” 

He had to convince himself of that fact. This random Walker pinned to a tree wasn’t family. At least - it wasn’t the same because it wasn’t his family. 

Beth gave him a tight-jawed look, staring him down with those large, knowing eyes. In that moment, he could hear your voice in his head, telling him exactly what she wanted to say. 

‘It’s someone’s family, Daryl. That Walker used to be someone. He used to belong to someone - he used to be important to someone. You need to consider that.’ 

Instead, Beth countered with something a bit more broad. 

“Killing them is not supposed to be fun.” 

She scolded him like a child, and he felt intensely small in that moment. He hated it. 

“What do you want from me, girl?” He warbled out, barely able to find his voice. 

He barely had anything left to give. 

He was a shit protector - as he had proven, unable to stop the prison walls from collapsing on top of you. Unable to hunt down the Governor - unable to keep him from rolling up to the gates with a fucking tank and blowing your house down. 

He was a terrible tracker - unable to find any of the people they had lost from the prison. He couldn’t provide anything for Beth that she couldn’t get for herself. She was more than capable. She was likely only with him now to stop him from going off into the woods and laying down to die. It was likely out of some mental obligation towards you, because she fully believed that you were still alive. 

He didn’t have anything left to give. 

After a moment of Daryl waiting with baited breath, she gave an answer. 

“I want you to stop acting like you don’t give a crap about anythin’.” She announced firmly. 

That would be difficult for him. Because currently, that was the only way he was surviving. He gave way too much of a crap about everything - and turning it all off was the only way he got through. 

“Like nothing we went through matters.” She added on. “Like none of the people we lost meant anything to you. It’s bullshit!” 

It was bullshit. 

“Is that what you think?” Daryl countered sourly. 

He cared too much about all of them. It all mattered too much. 

If he turned that switch back on - if he let himself care again - it would break him. 

“That’s what I know.” She whispered tightly near his face, all hot drunken breath. 

“You don’t know nothin’.” He spat back bitterly, absolutely assured of this fact. 

“I know you look at me and you just see another dead person.” Beth dueled on, determined to make her own point. “I’m not Michonne, I’m not Carl, I’m not Maggie, I’m not Glenn…. I’m not Y/N.” 

She knew that mentioning your name was sensitive, but she did it anyway, as if hoping to evoke some positive emotion out of Daryl. As if hoping to wake him from his dreary hopelessness. She hoped that mentioning you among the list of people that she still concretely believed to be alive would shake him, make him believe it too. 

She noticed that Daryl refused to make eye contact when she said it. 

When he didn’t say anything about it, she continued on. 

“I survived, and you don’t get it, cause I’m not like you or them - but, I made it.” 

She spoke passionately, determined about the point. If she had made it - someone who used to be so soft, someone who still needed to be protected - then why hadn’t everyone else made it? 

“And you don’t get to treat me like crap just because you’re afraid.” 

Somehow, among all that, one singular point stood out to Daryl. 

“I ain’t afraid of nothin’.” He grumbled back. 

To him, it was a horrid accusation. 

He had already lost everything that was important to him - what could fear possibly do to him now? 

Fear was the stupid, idiotic thing that had held him back in the first place. It had kept him from going after the Governor alongside Michonne. It had kept him tethered to the prison, stuck to your side watching you to make sure that you were safe. And look what it had gotten him. 

Nothing but ruin. Nothing but ashes. 

Beth looked contemplative for a moment, and Daryl hoped that she would finally just shut up. But then, like an unstoppable, sickly bile - the words came spilling from her lips. 

“I remember.” She announced. Before he could wonder what she was talking about, she continued on. “Back when you first came to the farm. The way you were - out combing the woods like a madman, looking for a little girl that wasn’t even yours. You never gave up hope, not once.” 

Daryl swallowed down his own words. 

He wasn’t some damn fool. He wouldn’t even begin to call it hope. He called it the truth - a little girl lost in the woods shouldn’t be hard to find. Like he had told Andrea at the time - it was the backwoods of Georgia, not the mountains of Tibet. It wasn’t the way that everyone else made it out to be. 

“Maggie told me that you cried when Y/N wouldn’t wake up.” 

Beth added on - to Daryl it felt like a mockery, a clever prodding at his vulnerability. But to her, it was just another observation. 

“That’s why you’re not out there, followin’ the trail. That’s why you’re not even botherin’ to look. You would spend months out there tryna find Y/N if you actually thought-” 

“Shut it.” Daryl grunted, cutting off her words. 

“You are afraid, Daryl.” Beth told him - and chills went through him as he realized that she had seen right through him. But like a prey animal staring down a predator, he kept stiff eye contact, trying his hardest not to let her know that he was weak. “You’re afraid of findin’ nothin’. And now you’re actin’ like it’s my damn fault.” 

When he didn’t speak up to make any apologies for this, she snidely added on:

“God forbid you ever let anybody get too close, right?” 

“Too close, huh?” Daryl reared back dully, gearing up for another fierce charge in the argument as things got all too personal. “You know all about that. You lost two boyfriends - you can’t even shed a tear. Your whole family’s gone, all you can do is go out lookin’ for hooch like some dumb college bitch!” 

He knew that he was being unjustly cruel to her - that on some level, he was taking it out on her just because he could. 

But he couldn’t let her talk anymore about him and his fucking feelings. Especially not about how he acted around you. God forbid that big precious four letter word came up. He needed to pull the knife out of himself and turn it around onto her. 

“Screw you! You don’t get it.” She easily snapped back. 

“No, you don’t get it!” He roared out, quickly growing tired of the seemingly pointless back and forth. “Everyone we know’s dead!” 

Beth looked icy shocked by the statement, but quickly argued against it. 

“You don’t know that!” She screeched bitterly at him. 

“Might as well be!” He yelled back. “Cause you ain’t never gonna see ‘em again!” 

Finally, they had come around to his entire reasoning - the whole fact as to why he had so faithfully given up. Even if they weren’t dead, he believed that he might as well operate on the assumption that they were. 

Of course - Beth was operating on the opposite mindset. Killing time, getting by, surviving until she believed that she would inevitably be reunited with her sister, and the other members of their newfound family. 

Beth let out a whimper as the truth of it hit her - as she fought past it. Battling internally as a small voice in the back of her mind said: ‘he might be right’. 

“Rick…” Daryl hesitated to list more people. Even now, he hesitated to say your name. “You ain’t never gonna see Maggie again!” 

It was a bitter personal attack, but he was putting on that hard outer shell - hoping to get Beth to become just as cold as he was. If she gave up, then she would leave him alone. She would stop trying to inject that stupid, putrid ‘hope’ into him. 

But of course, that infallible hope could not be stomped out of her. No matter what. 

“Daryl, just stop!” She begged quietly, and then - she reached out for him. Attempting to give him some comforting touch. 

The last time he had been touched by someone was when he had held your hand without you even knowing, staring at your unconscious face, waiting for you to wake up. Aside from that - a gentle pat on the shoulder from Hershel, assuring him that everything would be okay. 

But both you and Hershel were dead now. 

Daryl’s touch was a disease that he would not let Beth catch. 

He whipped away from her quickly, and turned to face the dead Walker that was still pinned to the tree. 

He used to belong to someone. 

That was how Daryl felt now. Used up and dead. Nothing but a past tense in someone else’s life. 

“The Governor rolled right up to our gates.” Daryl’s throat clenched tightly around the words. He could barely speak about it, but it was true. “Maybe if I… I wouldn’t’ve stopped lookin’. Maybe it’s cause I gave up? That’s on me!” 

He was supposed to keep you safe. He was supposed to keep everyone safe. 

He had failed. 

“Daryl-” Beth choked out, trying again - but she didn’t have anything to follow up. She couldn’t find anything to combat this particular chasm of self blame. 

“Your dad… maybe I coulda done somethin’.” He choked on a sob, and tears clouded his eyes now. 

It was his attempt at an apology. But he hadn’t even begun to forgive himself yet - so why the hell would Beth forgive him? 

Hershel’s death had been his fault. Your death had been his fault. 

The others… even if they were alive, their home was destroyed and now they were vulnerable to a cruel world. And it was all Daryl’s fault. 

Daryl finally broke down in sobs, and he didn’t have enough energy to fight off the touch when Beth leaned into him, hugging him from behind. 

He couldn’t muster up any more breath to better apologize to her for all he had done, but he hoped that it was implied. 

… 

Things were a bit more smoothed over later that night, when Beth was drunker and Daryl had sobered up some. 

“Is it always like this?” Beth sighed, staring out at the grass with a delighted smile. 

It didn’t take a genius to figure out what she meant. She was clutching a half-filled jar of the moonshine like it was precious, her eyes glassy - obviously no longer fearful of going blind because of the stuff. 

“You’re lucky.” Daryl remarked. “You’re a happy drunk.” 

Beth let out another contented sigh, and then after a moment, and another sip of the moonshine (which she was taking down without hesitation now), she spoke up again. 

“You’re wrong.” She told him calmly, seeming very confident in this fact. 

Daryl was tired of talking, but too curious not to reply. 

“Bout what?” He asked. 

“They’re not dead.” She told him. “They’re out there somewhere. All of them. And we’re gonna find them.” 

Daryl wanted to believe her. Some tiny part of him wanted to embrace this as truth. But at this point - it felt too much like fiction. Without his family standing in front of him, pure proof that they were alive and well - he couldn’t let himself partake in that paper thin hope. He couldn’t let himself get high on the hope only to come crashing down from that high in the worst way. He couldn’t let himself be hurt again. 

He only grunted in reply, staring at the worn floorboards of the porch, hoping the conversation would naturally frazzle out. 

Of course, Beth didn’t let that happen. 

“Come on,” She said in a nagging tone. “You don’t really believe that Y/N is dead, do you?” 

Daryl wasn’t sure what he believed. 

Before this, before the dead had risen up and walked the earth, he had spent his whole life focusing on truth. Concrete truth. 

For as long as he had been alive, that truth had been hopeless. His father had beaten him, his brother was an asshole, what little he knew of his mother was a drunken slur ultimately engulfed in flames. He had fended for himself most of his life. He never knew hope or optimism. He never spoke of luck or brightness or tipping the odds in his favor. 

Not until he met you. 

You laughed so genuinely; you sang the praises of looking on the bright side and blessing people with good luck. And he found that at times - he started to believe you. 

But having the Governor roll right up to their gates and blow apart their home wasn’t exactly conducive with everything you had been preaching. Having you sick and likely dead under a pile of concrete, unconscious and crushed without even knowing it wasn’t exactly in line with the ‘good luck’ that you supposedly had. 

Even if you didn’t know it, you had been feeding Daryl lies the whole time. And those lies had ruined him. 

Daryl couldn’t hold out hope that you or anybody else that he had known and loved from the prison were alive. 

“Don’t know.” Daryl grunted in reply. He kept his answer vague, not wanting to stir up another argument with Beth. 

“Yes, you do know.” Beth chuckled lightly in reply. 

Still ever the optimist. Still so damn certain. 

Daryl grunted again. Even if he didn’t agree with her, he wanted the day to end calmly, at the very least. 

“Can I see it again?” Beth asked, suddenly changing the subject. 

Again, this was a confusing little whip for Daryl - something that clearly only made sense to Beth in her own drunken mind. 

“What?” Daryl replied. 

“The picture.” Beth answered. “The one you tried to burn.” 

Daryl felt a pinch of guilt surge over him at the thought. Oddly enough, this was the one time he would be willing to admit that Beth was right - you can’t burn up memories. He was still glad to have a token of you with him, even if he would never get to see you again. 

“It was Y/N, wasn’t it? That drew it.” Beth added on, her words slurring slightly. She lifted the mason jar of booze to her lips again and Daryl was tempted to snatch it away from her. Something in the back of his mind reminded him that he wasn’t her chaperone - she was an adult, and if she wanted to get drunk enough to have a nasty hangover, then that was her choice to make. 

Instead, he found his hand drifting to his breast pocket and reaching to take the picture out. He presented it to Beth, who put down her drink to unfold it. She stared at the picture fondly under the brightness of the moonlight, tracing a finger over the slightly faded details. 

“You know… my daddy used to tell me that a cardinal is like an angel.” Beth said, recognizing the bird from her father’s teachings on the farm. “Someone - someone you loved who passed away, watching over you from heaven.” 

Daryl found this to be a nice thought. He could imagine Hershel’s voice in his head, saying something like this while pointing to the bird among the trees. 

“Y/N said they was good luck.” Daryl replied. 

It was the first time in a long time that he had gathered the courage to actually speak about you aloud, and he found a painful tugging in his chest because of it. 

Beth shrugged. “Same thing.” 

It was this thought that kept Daryl going for a long time. The idea that even if you were dead, you were watching over him somehow. He sure as hell didn’t believe that someone like Merle would be an angel - but you, you definitely were. And even if it was a waste of your eternal life, you would be determined to watch over Daryl - to make sure that he was safe, well-guided. 

You would make sure that he was lucky. 

That thought alone carried him through the long journey to D.C. 

It was something that lingered in his mind as the group hunkered down in a random barn - as he spotted something carved into one of the wooden beams holding the place up. Even though it wasn’t colored, he could have sworn that the long tail and pointed head of the silhouette indicated that the carving was meant to be cardinal. Of course. 

Who knows who had stayed in the barn before them - if it had been left there by a weary traveler, or even put there by someone who had used the barn before the Turn. But Daryl could have sworn that you - your ghost, your angelic hand - had led him to this very spot. 

It was a thought that gave him strength as he held the doors up - helped to keep them from caving in while the storm raged outside. 

Your luck, and your damn bird - you would keep him safe. 

When they reached Alexandria, and they were forced to give up their weapons - Daryl spotted your bird perched on the fence. Bright red, with its pointy head cocked sideways at him. All too knowing, staring at him like it wanted to say something. Just like it had been when he had fallen off the cliff out in the woods when he had been looking for Sophia. 

Oddly enough, it made him feel safe giving up his crossbow - perching his precious weapon on top of the fully loaded cart before the awkward, bespeckled woman wheeled it away. 

Rick was still weary of this new place after everything that had happened at Terminus, and Daryl understood. He followed Rick’s lead. Especially because he couldn’t tell Rick that he had a good feeling about this place because he saw a damn bird. Even if he was feeling such foolish things, he knew that he couldn’t speak them aloud. 

(He couldn’t speak them aloud to anybody but you. And well…) 

But even if it was just in spirit, he felt you there. He knew that it was the home you had chosen for them. 

So Daryl entered the strangely clean suburban home that Aaron had picked out for them and tried to imagine himself truly living there. He tried to think of Alexandria as his new home now. Because he knew that it’s what you would have wanted for him.  

… 

You were tired.  

You had just gotten back from a three day long hunting trip - three whole days out in the woods, killing small game while tracking a deer in order to shoot it and haul it home. 

For a while now, home had been a town called Alexandria. 

Well, you wouldn’t necessarily call it ‘home’. 

Alexandria was a great place to live, sure - but to you, home was a certain redneck bowman who often stank of cigarettes and dirt and had to be reminded to wash his hands before eating a meal. Home was the gentle grunt he gave you in response to a variety of questions, the scratch of his beard on your skin as he kissed you. 

You couldn’t think about him for too long - because you would get homesick. 

Since the prison had fallen, since you had escaped nothing more than debris and a crowd of Walkers - you had been moving from place to place, drifting. A lot of the time, you used the skills that Daryl had taught you during your time together in order to survive. 

When you found Alexandria, it felt like a dream. 

At first, you questioned why a shiny gee-golly boy in a blue rain jacket was trying so hard to ‘recruit’ you. You had to feel naturally suspicious of him and his stack of polaroids. But then you remembered what Daryl had said about bringing people back to the prison - bringing new people in wasn’t just about pity. There was strength in numbers. It became very clear to you very quickly that Alexandria needed fighters - they were bringing people as a tactic. 

You leaned into it. You proved to them what a good asset you were. You doubled down on using everything that Daryl had taught you in order to earn your place in the closed off community. 

You hunted and brought back game for the people there to eat, you used the skills Daryl had taught you to maintain the cars for runs and even fix-up ones that had been previously out of commission. You were widely liked by the members of the community, and Deanna often called on you for advice about dealing with Walkers. You had been on a few runs with their crews, but you preferred to stay close to town, to keep an eye on things. 

The hunt you had recently taken - three long days out in the woods. That had been for you. Something you had learned with Daryl was that hunting could be intensely peaceful. Maybe it was because it was time you spent with him - time when the two of you didn’t need words, just soaked in each other’s presence. Maybe you missed that too dearly. But you needed it to be just you and the trees, the focus on the craft that he had taught you. 

No closed-off bottle town politics. No smiling and nodding and pretending to care when the others complained about asinine things like the water from their showers going cold too quickly. Complained about being bored. To you, boredom was a blessing these days. 

No men sniffing around you, firing off increasingly poor attempts at flirting, believing that you were single even though you couldn’t tell them otherwise. It was difficult to explain to anyone in town that your heart belonged to someone that you hadn’t seen in a long time. Someone that you didn’t have the room to believe was dead. 

So after spending a few days in the woods, enjoying the peace alone, and bagging a deer and a few rabbits in the process, you came home. And currently you were in the shower, cleaning up - it was a blessing to even have a shower, to have perfectly functioning running water. A three day hunt could create a hell of a stink. 

Stepping under a stream of hot water after three long days out in the woods was one of the most satisfying feelings you could have ever conceptualized. The bottom of the tub quickly became muddy with a combination of blood from where you had cleaned the deer, and the general dirt you had gathered on your skin from the hunting trip. You let the heat of the water relax your tired muscles, and tried your hardest not to let your mind wander back to something you couldn’t have. 

When you got out of the shower, you felt wonderfully refreshed. You were still bone tired, and part of you did want to rush home and crash right into bed. But you had other things to do first. You had to check-in with Deanna, and go by the school before you could even think about going to bed. 

Olivia - ever kind and thinking ahead - had set out a change of clothes for you. She had seen you run upstairs to the bathroom covered up to your elbows in blood after you had asked her to stash the deer meat in the pantry’s freezer. 

You got dressed, and then went down to the pantry looking to make sure that she had taken the deer meat out of the plastic container that you had stored it in and put it into some plastic freezer bags to store it properly. She was squeamish around blood or raw meat - she had thrown up the one time that you had tried to teach her how to gut a rabbit, but you were hoping to wean her off those fears. 

Olivia was a nice girl. You knew that eventually, she would need to get her hands dirty in order to survive. It was a miracle that she had gone this long without doing so. When she told you that she still carried around a cellphone in her pocket - one that had long been dead and useless - you got stuck somewhere between paralytic shock and maniacal laughter. 

But it was just a mark of how untouched Alexandria was. How much they needed someone like you. 

“Olivia?” You called out gently when you hit the bottom stair. 

“In here!” She called back. She was in the armory rather than in the pantry - likely counting bullets to redo her inventory in order to avoid touching the bloody deer meat. 

You rolled your eyes at the thought of it and walked into the room, which was lined floor to ceiling with guns, the entire town’s supply. You were also casually pushing back against Deanna’s rule that nobody should be allowed to carry within town, but she had yet to truly hear you out on it. Your eyes fell upon a large cart that Olivia had parked in the middle, one that wasn’t usually there. It was filled to the brim with a variety of weapons. 

“What’s this?” You asked. 

“A new group came in yesterday, while you were gone.” She informed you, staring at the notebook she had in her hands - the one containing her inventory. “Deanna wanted me to make a list of their weapons. Well - the weapons they surrendered. I wouldn’t doubt if one of them is still hiding a knife in their shoe or something. They seem uber shifty and paranoid.” 

She said this with a dreary chuckle - the kind of nervous laughter that told you she was feeling weary of these people. 

A strange feeling came over you. A haze - tingling, from your head to your toes. A feeling almost as if you were about to faint - while at the same time, intense adrenaline was pumping through your whole body. You took a more careful look at the weapons gathered on the cart. 

A sword. One with the distinctive white leather sheath. A gun that you easily recognized as a Colt Python. A military knife with a knuckle guard… and perched right on top - a crossbow. The sight of which almost made your heart stop. 

“Maybe you could help me with this?” Olivia asked, motioning her pen toward the cart. “You know I don’t know the names of guns and stuff.” 

Clearly, she was trying to get out of bagging the deer meat - but that dropped off your priority list as you tried harder and harder to keep your hopes from swallowing you alive. 

“Sure.” You replied, knowing that it sounded terribly strained in your throat - joy and tears battling terribly inside of you. 

You gathered your breath, and forced your concrete legs to move. You stepped toward the cart, and timidly stroked a finger across one of the bolts that was strapped to the top of the crossbow. 

After a moment, you finally gathered the courage to ask the question. 

“So - can you tell me more about the group?” You asked, your throat clenching around the words, so damn dry all of a sudden. “Did you happen to catch any of their names?” 

“Come on,” Olivia sighed. “You know I’m no good with names.” 

Of course. 

The one time when you needed her to be paying attention, she hadn’t been. Where the hell was Aaron when you needed him? 

You could have been wrong. This could be nothing. It could be a coincidence. 

You wouldn’t let yourself get your hopes up - not until you knew. 

“Well - what were they like?” You asked. 

Olivia picked up one of the guns, inspecting it before she wrote down something in her notebook. It took her a moment too long to answer. You became dizzy with agitation, unconsciously holding your breath while you waited for something. Some proof. Something. 

“They were… strange.” She shrugged. “They reminded me of you when you first came here. But… you can tell they’ve been outside for longer.” 

That didn’t answer your question. So you moved on to another one. 

“How many of them was there?” You asked. 

“Maybe a dozen, I guess.” She answered easily. “It’s the biggest group Deanna has ever allowed in. I don’t know why, though. Aaron seems to really like them, but I didn’t get to talk to him much before he went home.” 

She wrote down something else, and then she continued - seemingly not noticing the way you were staring at her with an intense glare, hanging on her every word. 

You needed to know. 

“There was kids with them. A baby, and a young boy. A teenager, maybe? He was wearing this brown cowboy hat, that looked like a sheriff’s hat, kind of? I guess he got it off some cop.” 

‘My dad says that I get to wear the hat because I’m in the club.’ Carl’s small voice excitedly announced to you, pushing the too-big hat up over his eyes as it sagged down from how fast he had run toward you. 

‘What club?’ You countered curiously. 

‘People who have been shot and survived.’ 

‘Woah… okay. You probably shouldn’t go around saying that to people.’ You chuckled in return, trying to play off the casual morbidity. Knowing that ‘and survived’ was the important part. ‘Cool hat, though, kid.’ 

‘Thanks!’ 

As the memory from Hershel’s farm played over again in your mind - you remained frozen. Your voice was caught in your throat, seized by tears and shock - but all you could do was stand there as Olivia continued talking. 

“And their leader is this really grumpy guy. He kept… staring at me. His eyes were so cold… it was almost creepy. I could hardly see his face past his beard.” 

‘And, uh, I got this for you.’ Michonne chuckled, extending her arm out toward Rick, trying her hardest to gift him the electric shaver. ‘Your face is losing the war.’ 

The words evoked another memory from you - Michonne making jokes about Rick’s beard being overgrown, trying to get him to trim it down. Now, you couldn’t picture him without one when you tried to remember him. 

“Here, take this.” Olivia picked up the crossbow and put it in your hands. “Can you help me with the rest of these guns? I don’t know how to unload them. I need to take inventory of the ammo.” 

Your eyes were fixated on the crossbow in your hands - you ran your thumb over it. 

You had almost forgotten about it. 

Trying so hard to push down the memories, to forget - it had almost slipped your mind. The marking you had left on Daryl’s crossbow that made it so uniquely yours. The blessing of good luck you had marked him with when you had sent him to look for Sophia. 

The cardinal sticker that you had put on his bow. It was faded now, but it sure as hell was the one you had put there. 

In the back of your mind, you could still hear Daryl’s snarky voice snarling about how he didn’t need luck - but it had gotten him this far, hadn’t it? 

All at once, your nervous system shook, your body prickling up fiercely with goosebumps as the realization truly hit you. 

Daryl was here. 

Daryl was right here in Alexandria. 

He was alive. He was within arm’s reach. 

He was home. 

“Daryl.” You mumbled quietly, your voice still choking on it - it was a name you hadn’t spoken in so long. 

“What?” Olivia asked, turning around to look at you, clearly confused. 

“Daryl.” You spoke it louder. 

You looked to the door, and before you could take a moment to explain or even put down the bow - your legs were carrying you with a great urgency. 

He was close by - you were going to find him. 

“Daryl!” 

You screamed out this time, your voice echoing through the streets of Alexandria. Random people going about their day stared at you, but you didn’t care. You continued sprinting down the street, looking for that familiar face that you knew had to be close by. 

“Daryl! Rick! Michonne!” 

You screamed out the names of the people you knew would be with thim, and then your mind became fixated on him - on seeing his face again, on hearing him call you an asshole with a smile. Fueled only by joy, you pushed past your previous tiredness, determined to find him. Your cheeks began to hurt before you knew you were smiling and your legs pumped harder as you ran. 

“Daryl! Daryl!” 

You weren’t even sure where you were going, but you knew he would come to you - he would be there soon. 

You ended up at one of the last houses on the lot, rounding the corner when you finally spotted him. 

It was something you had pictured in your mind a thousand times. 

One of the quaint porches of Alexandria - so clean, so white, so picturesque - finally dirtied up by his presence. Olivia made you gut your kills in the back because she didn’t want it to disturb people, but Daryl didn’t know the rules, or just didn’t care. His hands were already covered in the blood of the possum that he was skinning - careful, meticulous, doing it right. His gaze focused downward in pure concentration - much like he had been on the day you had first properly spoken to him. 

Dressed in all black and still dirtied from the road - he was a sight for sore eyes. 

And he caused you to pull in a sharp, shattered breath as you began to cry outright now. Hot tears of relief, joy, love streaming down your face as you laid eyes on him for the first time in so long. 

His head snapped up at the sound of it, and his eyes widened beyond the splintering bangs that hung beyond his brows - hair longer than the last time you had seen him. His hands froze their movements, still hanging onto the half-skinned possum. You gripped tightly onto the crossbow, holding onto it tightly like an anchor, drifting at sea. 

You knew that look - his jaw gaped, his eyes swimming with intense emotion - shock, most of all. He was frozen. 

He was looking at you as though you were a ghost. 

In Daryl’s eyes, you might as well be. 

The last time he had seen you - you were dead. Or dying. 

It was all the same to him. 

He genuinely couldn’t believe that you were standing right there in front of him - alive, clean, beautiful as ever, holding his crossbow. It was like a dream. 

“I think I have something that belongs to you.” 

Hearing your voice again - it was oddly startlingly. You motioned toward the crossbow - his crossbow, that you were holding for some reason. 

His entire body was filled with concrete - he was frozen. 

“Daryl, is that possum so much more interesting than me, or are you gonna come on over here and give me a damn hug?” 

Yes.

That was what finally got him up - he tossed the possum aside because it would never be more important than you, and he rushed off the porch, rushing toward you. You dropped his crossbow in the grass and when he pounced on you, his arms encircling you for the first time in such a long time - you finally felt like you were home. He squeezed you in a bone-crushing way, and you squeezed him right back - feeling a strange kind of comfort from the smell of sweat and dirt and cigarette smoke coming off him. 

It was so Daryl. It was so real. 

You heard gentle sobs in your ear and you realized that he was crying too, so overwhelmed by the emotions of seeing you again and not too proud to hide his tears now. You didn’t notice and didn’t care that he was getting blood all over your clean shirt, gripping you so tightly with his possum-skinning hands. It was just another assurance that all of this was real and not another stupid daydream. 

“Goddammit.” He croaked out, his face shoved so tightly in the crook of your neck, soaking your skin with his tears. “I thought - I thought I lost you.” 

Pressed so close to his chest, you saw the yellowing corner of the paper sticking out of his breast pocket. You couldn’t help but to raise your fingers to fish it out of his pocket. 

“Why would you ever think that?” You sniffled weakly in return. “You had this for good luck.” You teased him lightly, pulling away slightly to wave the folded piece of paper in front of his face - both of you knowing exactly what it was. 

He let out a weak laugh in response. 

“You’re still a damn fool.” 

That was all he managed to reply before he put both hands on either side of your face and pulled you in for a kiss. It was unlike any other time he had kissed you before. This wasn’t chaste - it wasn’t a simple kiss signifying that he cared about you, that he was trying, but affection simply wasn’t his thing. 

This was gravity. 

This was passion, this was love. This was this kiss of a man who had nearly ended himself because he had realized in horror that his entire world had hinged on you. And now that he had you back, he wasn’t going to waste a single second treading around feelings, hung up on simple things like the fear of affection. This was a kiss from someone who needed to show you that you were his whole world, and now that he had you back, he would move mountains just to see you smile. 

It was a kiss that easily had you moaning into his mouth, made you dizzier than you already were, stole breath from your already weak lungs. 

He held you tight to his lips and he poured every single ounce of emotion into that kiss - telling you how sorry he was for all the time he had wasted, telling you how much he had missed you, and most importantly - telling you how much he loved you. 

“Daryl, please tell me that you’ve showered by-” 

The stunning moment was sorely interrupted by another voice, one you distinctly recognized as Carol. She opened the front door behind you and stuck her head out, ready to scold Daryl - but she promptly cut off her own words when she saw you. You pulled away from his lips at the sound of her voice and whipped around toward her, and instantly a smile cracked your face, broad and unbroken. 

She was staring at you with utter shock. 

“Carol.” You said her name warmly, greeting her as an old friend. 

You couldn’t help it - you jumped forward and embraced her in a hug. It was only then that she loosened from the shock and let her own arms fall around you, hugging you back, and she was able to speak again. 

“Y/N.” She said your name quietly in return. “What - what are you doing here?” 

“Um… returning Daryl’s crossbow.” You chuckled, motioning to the bow that you had dropped with numb arms before you had ascended the steps, rushing toward him. “But you know… I think I have something for you too.” 

Naturally, Carol looked confused - and you chose to show her what you meant rather than to explain. 

… 

You brought Carol and Daryl to a house in the complex that functioned as the school. They didn’t know that yet - and you asked them to wait outside as you rushed inside and boisterously disrupted the beginning of the afternoon class. 

The teacher began telling you off, but you didn’t care. 

Daryl and Carol were theorizing about what you were doing, half ready to go in after you when you stepped out the door with someone in tow. 

“What’s so important? We’re supposed to start reading King Lear today and I can’t miss-” 

Both of them looked up at the mousy voice and instantly recognized the streak of sandy blonde hair - a bit lighter now from exposure to the sun, topped on someone a bit taller than they remembered. 

“Sophia?” Carol gaped. 

A daughter she had said goodbye to in her mind, someone that she couldn’t keep hoping was alive. Somehow once again, standing right there in front of her, fully alive and well. Once again - all thanks to you. 

“Mom?” 

Sophia broke out of your grasp and ran from the door into her mother’s arms, and Carol quickly embraced the girl who was almost as tall as her now. Carol was unable to hold back her tears and you knew that it was a swelling of perfect emotion as they hugged each other so tightly. Daryl petted a gentle hand over Sophia’s hair as he looked at you fondly. 

You couldn’t imagine a more perfect day. 

Carol used a hand behind Sophia’s back to wipe some of her own tears from her cheeks, still not letting the girl go as she looked at you with a wet smile forming tightly across her face. 

“I should have known she’d be with you.” Carol choked out - her way of thanking you for taking care of her daughter. Clearly scolding herself for not keeping the faith alive that Sophia would be okay. 

“We’re BFFs.” You said, unable to hold back a smile. “Of course we’re gonna stick together.” 

… 

You thought back to the day you had first taken on the title of Sophia’s BFF. 

The two of you had been close since the group at the quarry had first formed. It was unfortunate, but Ed reminded you of your own father, and you found yourself gravitating toward Sophia because of that. A natural instinct kicking in that made you want to take care of her because you understood what she was going through. You knew that Carol had to take care of herself, had to keep her own head above water, and she said that she was always appreciative of your help. 

You knew that Sophia appreciated having you around, being treated with gentle caring and a certain kind of maturity that she needed from an older sibling that she didn’t have. You didn’t always treat her like a child - you talked to her like a person who needed to be listened to, who had her own feelings that needed to be heard. 

Especially after Ed’s death - when she was feeling conflicted about the partial relief of being freed from her father’s abuse but oddly missing him at that same time. You were more than happy to listen to her and give her honest advice. 

When she fled into the woods off the highway that day, Daryl had to physically hold you back to keep you from running into the tail end of the herd yourself. It would have been stupid for you to blindly run after her, especially considering that, at that point, you didn’t carry a knife or any other weapons on you regularly. You would have been running after Sophia with nothing but your bare hands and your best intentions. 

It would have ended up with you both dead, and in the end, you thanked Daryl for holding you back. 

Which was why you trusted Daryl greatly to find her. You trusted his skills and his abilities, and especially his judgment. And you silently cursed Andrea for almost shooting his head off and putting him out of commission in that search. Especially considering the fact that Shane and even Rick were clearly losing hope in ever finding Sophia alive, and it was clear that they were ready to call off any search efforts. They were ready to abandon the Greene farm and leave her out there to die. 

So after Daryl’s wounds had been treated, when he was resting in his tent, you decided that it was high time to get the search back on. Of course, you had to wait for Andrea to leave, after she had apologized to him and left him with one of Dale’s crappy books as entertainment - something you knew wouldn’t help him much, because he was far too much of a hands-on busy body to sit around and read. 

But you didn’t dwell too much on thinking about that. Instead, you stepped into the tent next without being invited, determined to get his advice so that you could pick up the search for Sophia where he had left off. 

Daryl’s eyes snapped open where he had been lightly dozing off and he glared at you - it wasn’t malice or true anger, instead, simply light annoyance. 

“Can’t get five minutes of damn peace ‘round here.” He grumbled out as you invited yourself fully into the tent and without speaking a word to him, came right in and sat down on the edge of his cot. 

He instinctively scooted away from you. He could have said that it was because you had aggravated soreness in his injured side where he was still stitched up. But truthfully, it was because he wasn’t used to having you (or anyone) this close. Though he also couldn’t deny that the simple warmth of your body - the gentle heat of your ass pressed up against his thigh from you having to sit so close on the small cot - it was nice. 

But he couldn’t think too much about that right now. 

You obviously weren’t as caught up on the simple act of closeness. You weren’t as mindful of being this close to another person. You were someone who thought nothing of hugs and other simple forms of affection - something that you did regularly with people you considered friends, like Glenn and Lori and Dale. 

Instead of thinking at all about how close you were sitting to Daryl, you dropped your bag at your feet and began rooting around inside of it, looking for something. A moment later, you pulled out a map, which you held in one hand and shoved tightly in Daryl’s face. 

“Show me where you found Sophia’s doll.” You ordered stiffly. 

Daryl grunted at you, chewing on one of his nails for a moment before he replied. 

“What good is that gon do?” He asked. 

You didn’t know how to track or follow a trail. You weren’t the outdoors type. If he sent you off looking for her, he’d probably have to go off into the woods looking for you next. 

You sighed and rolled your eyes. 

“Maggie is saddling one of the horses for me right now.” You explained. “You know that Shane has already given up, and Rick is about to.” 

You cleared your throat, trying to hide the quiver of potential tears. 

Daryl knew it wasn’t the kind of grief that everyone else held when talking about Sophia - you weren’t afraid that she was already dead and you would be combing the woods looking for a Walker to put down. You weren’t looking for closure. You were more terrified at the aspect of Shane and Rick giving up when someone you viewed as a little sister was still out there. You were afraid that she might be abandoned when she was still alive and had a chance to be rescued. 

“You’re not goin’ out there by yourself.” Daryl declared firmly. 

Predictably, he then tried to sit up - as if he would somehow accompany you in his severely injured state. But he didn’t make it very far off the cot before he let out a sharp wince of pain. Something he tried his hardest to conceal out of an ingrained toughness, so you knew that his pain had to be a lot worse than he was leading on. He fell back down instinctively and gripped a hand to his side, taking in sharp breaths as he tried to ignore the pain. 

“Well, you’re not going with me.” You griped sarcastically, motioning toward his injury. 

“Screw you.” Daryl replied, tossing up a middle finger - frustrated by his circumstances more than anything else. 

“Look, I’m gonna go whether you tell me where to pick up the trail or not.” You announced, firm and finite in your conviction. 

Of course. Stubborn. 

Daryl glared at you again. 

“And I’m not gonna drag your ass around with me,” You added on. “I just wanna know where you would search because before you got hurt, you were the best man for the job.” 

Daryl wanted to hate the snide, back-handed compliment - he wanted to hate your stubbornness and your inability to take ‘no’ for an answer. But he knew that you were going to keep to your word. You were going to do this with or without his help, and his help would be invaluable to someone like you. 

So, for some stupid reason, he folded to your will. 

(It would become a pattern so utterly predictable throughout your relationship. You were so direct and so stubborn that you learned how to play him like a fiddle.) 

“Gimme that damn map.” He grumbled out, finally folding to your infallible will. 

“Here, I have a pen. You can mark it down for me.” You announced brightly, giving him a chirpy smile as you got your own way. 

You reached back down to your bag, looking for the aforementioned pen, and Daryl bit his tongue. The fact that you even needed a marking on the map to remember what he was going to point out to you was a huge red flag for him - a sign of just how naive you were when it came to the woods, tracking, finding someone lost out there. 

He was already mentally preparing himself to go looking for you later. (He just hoped that this would be a good thing - that even if you got lost yourself, you would take some supplies to Sophia and help her survive a bit longer until he could get both of you back home.) 

He took the red pen that you handed to him and stiffly held the map, trying to ignore the gentle waft of floral soap coming off you as you leaned more into his personal space. More and more into his personal space, clearly trying to better pay attention to what he was showing you as he pointed to the landmarks on the piece of paper. 

“Found the doll down ‘round here.” He said, marking a small red X on the map. “I figured that she mighta dropped it when she was crossing the creek up somewhere here, and it washed downstream.” 

“Oh, okay.” You said. “So you think she’s on this side of the water?” You asked, pointing to a heading of your own. 

“Prolly.” Daryl nodded. “She gotta be close by the water cause it’s her only real landmark. You better stay close by the creek, got it? I don’t need to go in those damn woods lookin’ for your ass too if ya get lost.” 

“I’m not gonna get lost.” You sighed, snatching the map from him. 

“Make sure you don’t spend the whole time on the horse.” 

He added on, determined to give you good advice if you were determined to go out there. In the back of his mind, he was surprised that you knew how to ride a horse, but he didn’t bother to bring it up. Instead, he continued speaking about the topic at hand. 

“She’s little. It means she could be hidin’ somewhere down low. Caves, ditches, even down in the bushes. She could be passed out somewhere from the heat and you might not see her if you’re perched up high on that damn horse the whole time.” 

You nodded, soaking up all the information, determined to take advice from someone you knew was better versed in things like this than you were. 

“Anything else?” 

Daryl looked thoughtful for a moment. 

Then he reached off to the side for his own bag, holding in another pained wince as he stretched out his injured flesh. He batted away your hands as you went to help him, and his hands came back with a large knife - his hunting knife, sheathed in the cover that he often wore on his belt. You had never seen him without it, and you were surprised when he extended it out toward you - clearly wanting you to take the knife, even if only temporarily. 

“Daryl, that’s yours, I can’t-” 

“Shut up and take it.” He growled quietly. “This is gonna be better to you out there than any gun. And not just cause you’re a piss poor shot.” 

You rolled your eyes at the paper thin insult, but still hesitated to reach for the knife. 

“The woods are damn quiet, and if you run into a Walker, you gon need somethin’ quiet to take ‘em down.” He explained. And then, with a fair amount of cheek, he added on: “Come on. It’s for good luck.” 

You let out a sharp nasal sound that could have been mistaken for a laugh, and then you reached out and grabbed the knife, tucking the holster onto your belt. 

“Maybe I don’t need luck.” You stated, getting up and making your way toward the mouth of the tent. “If I run into a bunch of Walkers, I could just make a necklace out of ears. That would be very fashionable.” 

You winked at Daryl, and he flipped you off - though you knew he didn’t mean anything harsh by it, seeing as it was paired with a small smile that he was unable to hold back at your comment. 

“Asshole.” He mumbled under his breath. 

“I heard that!” 

(For some reason, this made him smile harder.) 

… 

Despite what Daryl believed, you were comfortable in the woods. 

You had spent a lot of your childhood camping - he likely would have called it ‘glamping’ (if he knew what that word was). Your family spent a lot of weekends in an RV, driving off to remote areas to go fishing or so that your father could go hunting. You spent a lot of time off in some cabin deep in the woods with no TV reception, playing around in the trees with a stick, making mud pies for fun. 

You knew the reason that you seemed so naive in Daryl’s eyes was because you spent all those childhood experiences very hands-off. Your father was a wicked control freak of a man who never let you touch anything, despite how many times you voiced wanting to learn. 

He insisted that your family have ‘happy’ family outings - he insisted that you get your ass in the boat while he was fishing, he insisted that you eat the game that he shot while out hunting, he insisted that you get out in nature because it was what he had done as a child. But he would never let you touch a fishing rod, he would never let you hold a gun to hunt or set a snare. He always told you it was because you were ‘too stupid’ and you would inevitably mess things up. 

So before Daryl had started teaching you the basics, you didn’t know how to read a map, you didn’t know how to start a fire, and you had been learning how to fix vehicles only because of Dale. Your mother was the one who insisted that you learn how to ride a horse because it was something she had learned during her childhood. (It had spawned a wicked argument between your parents that you didn’t want to think about.) 

But nonetheless, you felt comfortable by yourself in the quiet of the woods. It was a quiet you had come to enjoy throughout your childhood. 

It was why your ears immediately picked up on something - a particular noise - standing out from that quiet. The gentle thrashing of cicadas, the quiet bustle of leaves in the breeze, but then, something else. Crying. Distinctly - the sound of someone crying. 

You hopped off the horse that Maggie had given you and tied the saddle to a nearby tree, taking Daryl’s advice to get off and having a look on foot. 

And sure enough - you soon came to a small cliff, at the base of which there was a small rocky indenture that could have been considered a small cave. It was something that you might have passed by when perched so high on the horse. 

When you crouched down and got even lower on your hands and knees- 

“Sophia?” 

You almost couldn’t believe your luck. You had been riding for less than an hour, and fuck - there she was. 

She was curled up with her back to you, likely crying out of upset from being separated from her mother for so long, being scared and alone. Even covered in dirt - you recognized that blue tee shirt that she had been wearing when she had run off. And it’s not like there would be some other little girl hiding out in these woods. 

“Sophia.” You called her name a little firmer, in case she hadn’t heard you, or she was fatigued from the whole ordeal and needed a little extra jolt to awaken her attention toward you. It was then that her head turned and she gazed at you with two large teary eyes. 

“Y/N?” She hiccuped sorrowfully. “Wh-where’s my mom?” 

“Your mom is waiting for you,” You grinned at her, extending your arms out to invite her toward you - and she began crawling out to meet you. “Everybody set up camp at a farm just off the highway so we could look for you.” 

“I thought you were gonna leave me.” She sobbed, sitting upright and jumping into your arms - you couldn’t help but embrace her in a tight hug. 

Relief flooded your system, and though you knew that she was scared, hungry, and definitely dehydrated by now, you couldn’t be happier to have her in your arms - alive. To know that Carol would feel the same relief in such a short time. 

“Nobody was gonna leave you.” You assured her. 

You hated that it was a partial lie. But of course you weren’t going to tell her about Shane’s pessimism and Rick’s liability to fall for the ramblings of his best friend. They would all feel foolish when you rode back with her on the horse. And you would be happy to prove them wrong. 

Then, something else came to mind. 

“Are you hurt?” You asked, pulling away from the hug to inspect her. A secondary terror spiked your system. If she had been bitten - you didn’t know that you would be up to the task of ‘doing what needed to be done’ as Daryl had put it. 

“My ankle.” She said, motioning to her foot. Upon further examination, it was swollen so tightly that it looked more than painful, cartoonishly bulged over the edge of her shoe. The sight of it made you wince. “I fell down.” 

“Okay, well - one of the people at the farm is a doctor. So he’ll be able to fix you right up.” You smiled at her. “But you didn’t get scratched or - you didn’t get touched by any of the Walkers?” You asked, wanting to be sure. 

“I hid from them.” She assured you. “I was running away, and - and I got lost, and I couldn’t find my way back, and that’s when it got dark, and-” She broke into more sobs, and you reached out to hug her again. 

“It’s okay.” You assured her. “It’s okay, I’m gonna take you to your mom now.” 

“Look out!” Sophia screamed this in your ear suddenly, pointing a finger to something behind your back. 

Your heart thumped in your chest, panicked, and then, with an instinct you didn’t even know you had, you reached to the handle of the knife - Daryl’s knife on your belt. You pushed Sophia away, whipping around in order to jab the knife toward the danger. 

The first time you hit the Walker somewhere in the middle of its torso, and the second time you locked onto two disgusting yellow eyes - and you jabbed the knife right between them. Within seconds, all the movement in the Walker went limp, and it fell to the ground - and you let out a huff (not even fully knowing that you had been holding your breath) as you pulled the bloody knife out of its skull. 

“I got it.” You said, feeling victorious as you looked over your shoulder toward Sophia - who was shell-shocked and very tearful once again. “Let’s just… get on the horse and go back to the house, okay?” 

“There’s a horse?” 

You gave Sophia your canteen and she drank the entirety of the water during the ride back, and by the time the sun was setting, you were emerging from the trees with her sitting on the front of the saddle. 

On top of the RV, Dale and Andrea were having a dispute about who was supposed to be on watch. One especially heated after the debacle of Andrea accidentally shooting Daryl in the head. 

“Just give me - give me those! Give me those!” Andrea snapped, taking the binoculars from Dale. 

The man acquiesced to her fierce will, and he nodded, putting his hands up in surrender as he walked toward the edge of the RV to descend the ladder. 

Andrea put the binoculars to her face and looked out upon the fields, and what she saw shocked her more than the bloodied Daryl that she had mistaken as a lone Walker. 

“Oh my god.” Andrea gasped. 

“What?” Dale whipped back around, obviously thinking that something was wrong. “What? What?!” 

Andrea took down the binoculars and turned to Dale with a look of pure shock. 

“It’s Sophia.” 

… 

A short time later, everyone was gathered in the living room, an odd air of dread and tension having fallen over the group. It seemed that nobody else shared your joyous relief, as they were all anxious to hear it from Hershel’s mouth that Sophia was going to be fine. It was a case of waiting for the other shoe to drop, of course. 

It wasn’t long before Hershel came out of the downstairs bedroom to grace everyone with the news. 

“How’s she doin’?” Lori asked, practically trampling the man before he even had a chance to close the door behind himself. “Is she gonna be okay?” 

“Well - the girl is quite dehydrated after the adventure she’s been on,” He said, pressing that word, using it quite liberally. “But - after some IV fluids and rest, I don’t see any reason why she won’t make a full recovery.” 

Lori burst into tears. The previously silent room became a muddle of relieved sighs, delighted chatter, and more tears - and the joy you had somehow been suppressing exploded inside of you tenfold. As you looked around at everyone hugging and celebrating, you realized that there was just one person missing from the scene. 

The man who had made it possible to find her in the first place. 

You knew that Daryl should be resting because of his injuries - but what he should be doing, and what he usually did weren’t two things that often coincided. You wandered out the front door while everyone was distracted by the exchange of hugs and the general relief of the whole situation, and you weren’t surprised to find Daryl sitting in front of his tent, poking at a low-flamed fire with a long stick. 

You were slightly surprised to see him sitting up - but if you weren’t mistaken, his shirt was licked with blood on the side where his stitches would be underneath. So he was aggravating the wound and simply ignoring the consequences. Very predictable for him. 

“Hey.” You greeted him casually as you walked up. 

He didn’t bother to take his eyes off the flames, and after a quiet moment, he quietly spoke. 

“She okay?” He croaked out - his typical meditative speech. No more words than he needed. You liked that about him. 

“She’s great.” You answered. “You were right. She’s gonna eat a good meal and sleep in a warm bed tonight, and she’s gonna wake up next to her mother. She is gonna be more than fine.” 

If you weren’t mistaken, the small flinch at the side of his mouth - something that could have been taken for a tic in his cheek muscle - it was a genuine smile at the idea of Sophia actually being okay. A smile at something actually turning out well for the group. 

“And it’s all thanks to you.” You added on, taking the opportunity to give him genuine praise where it was due.  

Daryl shook his head. “Nah.” 

“Come on.” You sighed, crossing your arms. “You pointed to a place on the map, I went there, I found her. That’s all you.” 

Daryl rolled his eyes. “Maybe you’re just lucky.” 

You knew he was being snarky, but you couldn’t help leaning into it. 

“I am.” You grinned at him. 

He sighed harshly, shaking his head. He resisted the urge to argue, not wanting to ruin the general air of happiness at Sophia coming home alive. 

“But the knife did help.” You had to admit it - he had been right about forcing you to take it. You took it off your belt and extended it out back toward him, and he hesitated for a moment, perhaps wanting you to keep it for your own protection - and then he took it back. 

“Told ya it would.” He grumbled quietly. 

Before you could form some clever reply, you heard the front door of the house open once again, and you were surprised when Carol came marching toward you. You thought for certain that she would be attached to Sophia’s side after such an ordeal, but soon enough, she was sweeping you into a tearful hug. 

“Thank you.” She wept into your shoulder. “Thank you, thank you so much. You found my daughter - you brought her home.” 

“Oh. I…” You weren’t really sure how to respond. “It wasn’t all me. Daryl told me where to look. He was the one who followed the trail.” 

Again - you had to give him the credit where it was due. 

“Of course.” Carol nodded, pulling away from squeezing you and moving toward Daryl. 

He jumped up from his camping chair so fast that he knocked it over, nearly tripping over himself in an effort to escape her thankful affection. A tense silence fell over the three of you as he gripped at his side, and he stared her down with wide eyes like a deer caught in a hunter’s cross-hairs. 

“I got stitches.” He mumbled out, clearly looking for an excuse as to why he couldn’t be hugged in the same way. 

“Okay.” Carol replied meekly. “I still want to thank you for everything that you’ve done for my daughter.” 

“Yeah.” Daryl nodded. “Welcome.” 

…

Even if Daryl didn’t know it then, helping to bring Sophia home truly cemented his place in the group. If it wasn’t a truth in everyone’s eyes, it was you whispering it to them, hammering home the fact that he was more than worthy - not as some kind of politician, but because you truly believed in him. 

And while you spent time rooting for him, he became an iron clad wall behind you. He continued teaching you every single skill he could, imparting all of his knowledge. And while you had insisted on returning his knife to him, he realized that a bothersome nuisance was that you didn’t have a good knife of your own. 

And he needed to make sure that you got one. 

Things were always subtle with him. He never went out of his way to make it seem like he was intentionally being nice to you or giving you a gift. He always made it seem like it was a coincidence - a side effect of whatever else was happening at the time. If the two of you went hunting together, he was teaching you because it was practical, because he had to. 

If he picked a flower out of the ground and tucked it behind your ear, it was because he claimed you smelled bad and it would dampen ‘the stank comin’ off you’ - not because it was meant to be any kind of affectionate gesture. If he made sure that you got a little bit extra on your plate that night, it was because he didn’t like the particular kind of game he had picked up, or because he was giving you ‘the worst parts’. Not because he was trying to make sure that you ate more in order to stay healthy and keep from going hungry. 

So when he gifted you a hunting knife of your own, it was entirely by mistake, of course. 

You didn’t know that he had been on the lookout for one with the intention of giving it to you for weeks. He wanted you to be able to protect yourself, and to be able to gut and skin your own kills properly now that you were learning to hunt. And in order to do that, you needed a good knife of your own. 

It just so happened that he found the perfect one while the two of you were out on a formula run for Little Asskicker. The kid was only a few days old and had lungs like a professional opera singer, wailing loud enough to shake the prison walls every few hours, and she was going through enough formula to fill up a mac truck. At least, that’s what it seemed like. 

The stuff that Maggie and Daryl had gotten just after she had been born had only lasted about a week. So now, you were out with Daryl once again, raiding a small rest stop that the two of you had seen nearby while out on a hunt. 

So far, the trip had been pretty successful. 

After struggling to get through the heavily padlocked and gated front door, Daryl boosted you through a higher up back window - which left you impressed by his strength and slightly afraid to fall on the other side (and then grossed out by the state of the bathroom that you ended up in). You got the gate up from the inside and found the keys to the padlocks on the dead owner (sitting in his office chair with a bullet in his head beside a very typical scrawl on the wall about hopelessness that you tried to ignore). And soon, Daryl unlocked the chains and then the two of you were in. 

Turns out that the security had been a deterrent for other people, and the place was relatively untouched. The two of you made off like bandits. Medicine, bandages, canned food, bottled water, juice, and of course - plenty of baby formula. Daryl even found a spare car battery that would work for one of the vehicles, and a half full can of gas. 

You were celebrating your haul with a handful of jellybeans each, smiling to each other, when Daryl noticed something. The molding corpse of the owner, now nothing but dried out skin husking against the bones with tattered old clothes rotting on top - had a very nice leather knife holster on his belt. 

Some things really do withstand the test of time. 

He necked down the rest of his candy, and as he chewed, he stepped into the office and you cringed as he reached for the dead man. 

“What are you doing?” You asked. 

“Thas a nice knife.” He mumbled in return, causing an awful crunching sound as he peeled the holster off the corpse. 

You had to admire him - where everyone else saw decay, he saw possibilities. 

He took the knife out of the holster and admired it for a moment, and sure enough - it was a damn nice bowie knife. It would need to be sharpened, but things like this last a lifetime. It would be perfect for you. He took out his bandana and wiped it off a bit, getting off any of the decay or dead skin that the previous owner had gotten on it, and then, he turned to you. 

“Here.” He said, holding it out to you. “You need one.” 

You did have a knife on you - a small pocket knife that Maggie had lent you for the trip out. Though you knew it was a nice gesture in Daryl’s mind, you were slightly hesitant to take something that had come off a corpse. 

“No, I don’t-” You huffed, trying to deny it. 

Next, Daryl did something that entirely shocked you, causing any protests to easily die off in your throat. 

He stepped forward, crowding into your personal space with his tall, looming presence - hot, sweaty skin lurking on every inch of him, warm breath that lingered partially with cigarettes and the sugar he had just consumed becoming absolutely apparent under your nose. And then, he lifted up the edge of your shirt, causing sharp tingles all through your body when his knuckles brushed across the bare skin of your hip as he forcefully slatted the holster onto the edge of your pants. 

His eyes were sharply locked on your hip, refusing to look at you, busying himself with securing it and then straightening the fabric of your shirt behind it so that you would have easy access to it in case you needed it. But your gaze was hard locked on the side of his face, only inches from yours. And you knew that he could feel how thick the air had gotten between the two of you. That he hadn’t missed the tiny gasp you had let out the second his skin had brushed against yours. 

“Daryl-” You said his name quietly, a whispered prayer, and before you could wander any further into dangerous territory, he easily cut you off. 

“There.” He grunted out, stepping back, breaking off the tedious moment. “Now you got one.” 

Before things could swim any further into that murky territory, he moved back to the bags the two of you had packed full of supplies, forcefully busying himself with taking them out to secure onto his bike. 

That moment left you thinking about his hands for hours after, days after - and you still thought about that moment occasionally when you used the knife. 

Strangely enough, you didn’t work up the courage to kiss him for the first time until much later, still lingering with the belief that he might reject you, even after that heated moment. 

…

It wasn’t long before news got around to the rest of the group that you and Sophia were in Alexandria, alive and well. You were greeted with many tight hugs, excited chattering, and you were introduced to the new people who had helped the group along the way and seemed to have cemented themselves into the family now. 

Quickly the idea came about that everyone should gather for a big family dinner - much like the one that was held to celebrate Sophia coming out of the woods alive and well. 

Even though it was something that had peeved you earlier, ultimately you were glad that Olivia hadn’t put the deer meat in the freezer, because it meant that you were able to treat everyone to something fresh. On top of that, when you had first arrived in Alexandria, Aiden had gifted you a few bottles of wine with some cheeky line about ‘sharing’ them with you whenever you wanted, and they had been gathering dust in a cabinet somewhere - so you could think of no better occasion to open them. Soon, you were all sitting in the living room of the house that Rick and company had been sleeping in - sleeping bags and blankets cleaned up in favor of a jumble of mismatched tables and chairs thrown together to make a long dining table that would fit the entire group. 

Surrounding the table was the whole group - Rick, Michonne, and Carl who was holding sweet little Judith on his knee (someone you had been so excited to see again). Beth and her new friend Noah (who were not-so-subtly holding hands underneath the table). Maggie and Glenn (who had hugged you so tight upon seeing you and refused to let go for nearly a full minute), their new friends Abraham, Rosita, Tara, and Eugene. Sasha, Bob (who looked happier than ever somehow) and Tyreese. 

And to round out the table, Carol sitting close by to Sophia with an arm wrapped lovingly around her daughter. Daryl was sitting next to you with a hand so shamelessly on your thigh - something that he never would have done before that you absolutely loved. As you looked around, all you saw was family - even in the people you didn’t fully know yet. You knew from Glenn and Beth’s words that the new people were nothing but good - and that was more than good enough for you. 

Radiating through you was nothing but pure joy. You truly didn’t know how things could get any better than this. 

“Well, I would like to propose a toast to our host,” Abraham said, rising up out of his seat and raising the plastic cup that he had filled with wine toward you. 

“Technically, Rick is our host,” You reminded him, nodding toward the man who looked so odd when he was clean shaven. It felt so strange to see his naked face. 

“Hey, this has only been my house for a day.” Rick replied with a shrug. “You can take full credit for giving us the best damn welcome wagon ever. This is a pretty fine spread you managed to put together on such short notice.” 

“Well, in my book, anybody who brings such good grub and such prime booze is the host,” Abraham argued lightly, giving a grin. “Plus, you were crawling around in the woods and shot down this buck so we could eat it. That deserves a thanks.” 

“Well, you’re welcome.” You shrugged in return. 

Everyone else raised their glasses in a slightly disorganized chorus of ‘thanks’, and Abraham accepted this and sat back down. You felt almost too humble and too embarrassed to accept it. You didn’t think that providing food for your family was all too big of a deal. 

“Dude, I’m just happy to be eating something that’s not from a can.” Tara added on with a grin. 

“I’m just happy that we’re all together again,” Bob replied with a smile. 

“Cheesy.” Sasha scolded him lovingly, rolling her eyes. 

“Well, I’m not the only one deserving of thanks.” You shrugged, feeling a need to deflect some of that embarrassment. “Daryl taught me how to hunt.” You explained, giving him a pat on the thigh to affirm the credit in his direction. “I wouldn’t even know how to hold a knife properly if it wasn’t for him.” 

Carol smirked. “That’s always your story, isn’t it?” She mocked you gently. “‘Daryl showed me the map.’ ‘Daryl taught me how to build a fire without matches.’ ‘Daryl taught me how to hotwire a car.’” She said, performing a mocking imitation of your voice. 

Sophia let out a gentle laugh at this, having heard this plenty of times from you while on the road together. 

This time, you could see Daryl shrinking back into his seat slightly with embarrassment, his eyes purposefully fixated on his empty plate instead of looking at anybody else around the table. 

“Well, it’s true.” You replied. 

… 

You thought back to a time shortly after you and Sophia had escaped the prison alive. You had tried looking for the others, and found nothing but the stalled prison bus, surrounded by corpses. The two of you were tired, broken down, starving - luckily, you and Daryl kept some hunting supplies outside the fence for when the two of you went hunting, including the spare crossbow that he had fixed up to teach you with. 

So you had managed to snag a few squirrels and gut them just as night fell, and you started a fire with the flint and steel with minimal difficulty as he had taught you. 

“Daryl taught you all this stuff, huh?” Sophia wondered aloud as she watched you put the flayed squirrels, now skewered onto sticks, over the fire to be cooked. 

“Yeah.” You confirmed gently. “I’m certainly glad he did.” 

You didn’t let yourself wonder where Daryl was, if he was okay. You couldn’t imagine that someone like him would be easily taken down by Walkers, not with how you had seen him handle himself. Anybody could be blown apart by a thousand pound tank or smashed by falling concrete, even if they were as skilled and vigilant as him. 

But you refused to let yourself think about it. You refused to worry about going back to pick over ashes just to have some confirmation - because there wouldn’t be any. You had to believe he was alive, or not even think about him at all. 

You had to take care of Sophia. 

A rattle in the leaves behind you caught your attention, and you grabbed your crossbow without any hesitation. You whipped around and pointed it toward the source of the sound, and soon found yourself staring down a random man. He didn’t hesitate to walk closer to your makeshift campsite, clearly unafraid of you even with your weapon raised. 

He was obviously someone who had been outside a long time - his clothes dirty and tattered, his teeth rotting as he gave you a filthy smile. 

“What do we have here? Hmm?” He greeted you in an oddly calm way - perhaps his attempt at mocking kindness. 

A general sense of unease caused all of your hair to stand on end. 

“Sophia,” You called her name gently, getting her attention, and in a moment, she was at your back, standing behind you while you stayed guarded. 

“Y/N-” She said your name quietly, grasping at the back of your shirt. 

“It’s okay.” You assured her, keeping the man locked in your sights as he came to fully stand in the light of the fire that you had made. 

“Oh, it is okay.” The man chuckled. “I assure you that I don’t mean any harm.” 

He gave another filthy smile - not just dirty by the color of his teeth, but something deeply unsettling that made your stomach twist with disgust. 

“I’m only looking for a kind person to share the night with. Perhaps I can share the warmth of your fire, and we can make friends.” 

He peered around you then, and eyed Sophia heavily with a look that made you all too certain your next move. 

You pulled the trigger on your bow and shot him, the arrow landing perfectly in the hollow of his neck - he sputtered on his own blood for a moment, and then fell to the ground. You felt regretful that Sophia had to witness it, but you knew that sadly, during her time at the prison, she had seen similar or even worse things. 

Once you were sure that he was dead, you walked over to his corpse and pulled out the arrow, and stabbed him in the temple with it to make sure that he stayed down. And then, almost hearing Daryl’s voice in your ear telling you what to do next, you began looking over his corpse for anything useful. His backpack held a few cans of food, and the knife on his belt wasn’t too bad. You gave it to Sophia and reminded her to tuck her shirt behind it as her mother had instructed. 

After you dragged the body far enough away so that it wouldn’t be an eyesore, the two of you enjoyed some canned spinach alongside the squirrels for dinner. 

…

“He knows a lot of very practical stuff and I’m lucky that he’s taught me so much.” You added on, not even realizing how much praise dripped through your voice as you spoke about Daryl. “It’s a huge reason that me and Sophia survived out there for so long. I was able to get us food and fix vehicles for us to get along because of what Daryl taught me. Back at the beginning of all this, I would have been so helpless and… probably dead if I had gotten stranded out there by myself.” 

You felt Daryl’s eyes on you, thoughtfully fixed on the side of your face, and he gently squeezed your thigh. It warmed him to the core to know that he had given you a gift - that he had kept you and Sophia alive with the proxy of his knowledge and skills, even if he couldn’t be there to protect you and provide for you himself. In a way, he had kept you fed and safe all that time. 

It was so sweet that you felt a devilish temptation curling up in you. 

“And you know, him being cute is just a bonus.” You added on with a grin - knowing that it would tickle him with embarrassment that you had loudly, affectionately announced this in front of the group. 

And it worked. 

“Aw, shove it.” Daryl scoffed, reaching up to shove your shoulder. 

But you didn’t get very far away, didn’t get to fall off your chair completely before he took the hand off your thigh and wrapped that arm around your neck, pulling you close and smothering your cheek in a few beard-scratchy kisses, making you cringe and smile all at the same time. 

This was a brand new, openly affectionate side of Daryl that you had never seen before. He had missed you for so long and he certainly wasn’t wasting making up for lost time. 

Fuck, you really loved him. 

“You know, Dixon, I never woulda guessed that you off all people would be saddled up.” Andraham commented. 

“Yeah, you never mentioned Y/N before,” Rosita added on, clearly curious as to why Daryl had never mentioned you. 

Beth gave Daryl a very knowing look as he reached for his glass of wine and finished it off, and Daryl felt lucky when someone else spoke up before he could. 

“We all saw it coming. Him getting ‘saddled up’, that is.” Michonne added on with a smile. “Carl owes me a Baby Ruth, though.” 

“The over-under was two years,” Carl hissed quietly in reply. 

Rick glared at them, and any further discussion about this bet was silenced. 

“You never told us how you got out.” Glenn piped up, suddenly curious about this. “The prison was utter chaos, if I had known that someone else was alive in A-Block, I would have-” 

“It’s not your fault.” You pressed. “It’s actually a really crazy story.” 

“Well please - do tell.” Sasha said. 

… 

Chaos. Noise. 

Being woken from the deepest unconsciousness of your life, still coughing up ugly yellow mucus and nearly having large chunks of the concrete ceiling fall on top of you due to an apparent explosion - definitely not one of your best days. Your vision was a clumpy haze due to the sickness you were still battling and you had to forcefully, bloodily rip out the IV that Hershel had put in you in order to try and navigate through it all. You climbed over the fallen bits of the building, stumbling around with a dizzy, weak body to climb down what was left of the stairs and partially falling down to the ground floor. 

“He - hell - o?!” Your efforts to call out for help were damped by coughing and the general chaos around you - the sounds of more explosions and a hail of gunfire that you could barely form panic over because your head was pounding and you still felt so fucking ill. 

You needed to find Daryl. You needed to find somebody. 

The prison bus. That was the plan if things ever went wrong. 

You moved toward the exit and found that the main hallway was blocked by more debris, but a splintering path that you knew led toward the library wasn’t. Even in your hazy state, you remembered the fact that Carol had a very large trunk in the library filled with emergency supplies. Water, dry rations, and knives that she had been teaching the kids with. Even if you couldn’t get to the bus, you could get those supplies and get out on foot. The others would likely be camping somewhere along the highway when the bus eventually ran out of gas, so you could catch up to them - eventually. 

It was the best plan you could come up with on such short notice, so you stumbled your way toward the library, and as soon as you opened the door - another explosion rocked the building, causing one of the tall, unsecured bookshelves to come tumbling down on top of you. You ended up flat on your back with the large shelf crushing you, leaving you as perfect bait for Walkers that were likely being lured by all that noise outside. 

Though you were already weak from illness, you did try to move your arms - and you found out that only one of them wasn’t completely pinned down by the shelf. It was a completely futile effort to try and lift the thing off yourself. Between the weight on top of your lungs and the way the illness had weakened your system - you soon passed out. 

When you drifted back into consciousness, the noise had greatly lessened. There was the faint growling of Walkers - cordoned off unintentionally in some other area of the prison - but there were no more explosions, and no more gun fire. 

The first thing that caught your eye was something bright red. You focused your eyes to focus, and you quickly realized that it was a picture of a red cardinal. A hand-drawn sketch on the front of a book titled ‘Birds of North America’ that was on one of the other shelves. It was tipped perfectly into the line of your vision, as if meant for you to see. 

Before you could futilely try to lift the shelf off yourself again, you heard a voice. 

“Hello? Is anyone in here?” 

You quickly recognized who it was. 

“So-Sophia?” You called back, barking out another cough that strained your words. Luckily, she heard you. 

You were soon greeted by the sight of her legs rushing toward you. Though you had no clue how such a waifish girl would ever be able to lift the bookcase off you, you were at least relieved that you were no longer alone. 

“What happened?” She asked, kneeling down to speak to you. 

“Stupid thing fell on me.” You wheezed quietly. “I came in here looking for your mom’s stash. I’m guessing you had the same idea?” 

“Yeah.” She confirmed. “Can you get this thing off you?” 

“Yeah. I was just having a leisurely lie down underneath a bookshelf.” 

Sophia rolled her eyes at your sarcasm. 

“Guess I’ll just leave you here then.” She remarked, battling back with her own sarcasm, clearly having no intentions of doing so. 

“Well you might have to… I have no clue how you’re gonna lift this thing off me.” You admitted quietly, hating how defeated you sounded. 

“I think I have an idea.” 

You were curious what she meant, and you couldn’t quite see what she was doing as she stepped out of your eyeline and made some noise, shuffling around to grab something. Then she came back with a long wooden beam - a shelf she had broken off of one of the other fallen bookcases. She stacked up a few of the books, making a hinging point, and then stuck the beam underneath the bookcase and somehow - using all her bodyweight, she was able to push it off you for long enough for you to crawl out from underneath it. 

“Thanks, kid.” You smiled at her as you sucked in greedy breaths. 

“Glenn taught me that.” She smiled back. “He said it’s basic physics.” 

“I’ll remember to thank him when I see him.” You said. 

… 

Sitting at the dinner table, you then turned to Glenn. 

“That reminds me,” You said. “Thanks for that.” 

Glenn chuckled. “Happy to help.” 

“Okay, okay, I’ve just one question,” Rick piped up. “Why did you have a stash of weapons in the library, Carol?” 

Carol took a long sip of wine, pointedly avoiding the question. 

“Oh shit, he never found out about storytime, did he?” Carl chuckled, obviously directing this question toward Carol. 

“Storytime?” Rick echoed, eyeing his son heavily, clearly confused. 

You cut them off, not wanting to get Carol in trouble for her proactive teaching a bit too late. 

“Okay, let’s all just be happy that we’re together and that we’ve had a nice meal.” You said. “I’m not doing dishes. You guys have fun with that. Come on, Daryl, I’ve got somethin’ to show you.” You made your exit, getting up from the table and hoping he would follow - which he did, making way to push out his chair. 

“Is it your bare ass?” Abraham joked, clearly at least a bit drunk. 

“Abraham!” Rosita chastised him with a gentle smack. 

“What? I think it’s cute that Dixon’s all shacked up.” He replied with a chuckle. 

“You’re lucky he doesn’t punch your lights out for that one.” Tara remarked. 

“Nah, you’re safer with Y/N around.” Maggie commented. “He gets all soft when he’s around Y/N. It is cute.” 

“Oh, if you think this is cute just wait til I tell you about what they were like back at the prison.” Michonne added on. “He used to bring Y/N dead squirrels like a cat dropping dead mice at someone’s doorstep. I have no clue how such an odd form of flirting actually worked.” 

“Well, some people like dead squirrels, some people like toothpaste.” Rick replied. 

And that was the last of the conversation you heard before you closed the front door behind you, going off down the street with Daryl in tow to show him your place. 

When you took him up the porch of another manicured house and opened the door, he quietly croaked out: 

“This ‘ur place?” 

“Yeah.” 

You told him, shoving your boots off, not wanting to get dirt on the clean rugs inside. Daryl felt a bit strange taking his shoes off - knowing that his overly worn socks had holes in them, but still, he followed suit. He knew you wouldn’t judge him for something as petty as his socks having holes in them, after all. 

“This is where me and Sophia have been living. But there’s always room for one more. If you’re done snuggling up next to Rick on the living room floor,” You couldn’t let another opportune joke escape you, and Daryl rolled his eyes. 

“Asshole.” He gently scoffed. 

Though the two of you had never slept in the same bed together before. And he couldn’t help but to love the idea of being curled up next to you at night. He found that he also loved the idea of waking up next to you every morning - especially after going for so long without seeing your face. You walked up the stairs and he couldn’t help but to follow you, and he was surprised when you didn’t lead him to bed - but instead, went to the back of a hallway, and pulled down a latch. 

This unleashed some stairs that led to the attic, leading the two of you up even higher. He found himself shamelessly admiring the view of your ass as he followed you up the stairs, and when he emerged into the dark attic (only lit by a few strokes of moonlight coming in through the small window) - he was surprised by what he saw. He had to crouch down on his hands and knees to be comfortable, and he quickly adjusted to sit down on his ass as you had. 

It appeared that you had built a watchtower of sorts up here. 

There was a telescope set up in the small window, and off to one side, there was a cork board with a hand-drawn map of the surrounding area, a few notebooks sitting in the corner that you likely wrote down observances in. Posted on the cork board - there were names of all the residences in town, and you had written down certain traits beside each of them. Along with a hand drawn map of the town itself and names on the houses, indicating where everyone lived. 

“So you’re gettin’ paranoid?” Daryl joked. 

“No.” You scoffed. “Besides, you should know that a healthy level of paranoia is necessary these days.” 

It was in that moment that it truly hit Daryl - you had taught him to be hopeful, even if he hadn’t fully known it at the time. And he had taught you to be less naive, to be firmer in order to survive. The two of you were only alive, only able to have the privilege of being in each other’s presence now because you had accepted those pieces of the other person that kept you alive. 

“Ain’t that right.” He replied. “Why did you wanna show me?” 

You shrugged. “I thought you might like it.” 

Daryl couldn’t hold back his grin - one of the most genuine smiles you had ever seen come from him. He did like it. He liked that he had made a little fighter out of you. But at the same time, nothing had snubbed out the perfect spark that he had fallen in love with. Your smile, your laughter, the brightness in your eyes - somehow, it was all still the same. It made him love you even more somehow. 

“I guess I also wanted to thank you.” You added on. “I meant what I said before. You taught me so much - I would have been clueless without you. I would have starved to death and been blind, and lost and stupid without everything that you taught me.” You declared passionately. “You kept me fed and sheltered and warm, and I don’t know how much I could thank you for that.” 

Daryl began to get choked up, and he hated that for the second time that day, more tears swelled in his eyes. 

He knew that in a different way, you had kept him fed, sheltered, and warm too. You had kept his soul from dying out in those woods - you had kept his spirit fed on the idea of hope that he never would have conceived as something real before he had met you.

He couldn’t bring himself to put it into words. So instead, he found himself reaching out toward you. He put a firm hand under your jaw and guided you toward him; you easily fell limp to the touch and let yourself be guided toward his mouth once again. 

This was much less of a surprise than the earlier kiss. This was much warmer, like sinking into the hot shower had been earlier that day. Only this was much, much better. You let out a gentle moan as you let yourself feel it, simply enjoying the tingling sensation throughout your body, gripping into the lapels of his vest, crawling forward to sit in his lap as your mouth embraced his. 

After a moment, you pulled away. There was only one thing on your mind, one incomplete thread that you had been thinking about since you had lost him at the prison. 

“I love you too.” 

Daryl grunted in reply and pulled your mouth back to his. 

For once in his life, he didn’t feel like a fool for letting himself hope. 

That night, Daryl went to sleep in your bed. 

For the first time in far too long, he got to wake up knowing that you were alive and well - he had the privilege of being greeted by the sound of your even, calm breaths. You slept on his chest long after he awoke, and he let you. He was greedy and starved for your touch, soaking in the feeling of your warmth half on top of him, nosing over the top of your head to enjoy your natural scent mixed lightly with the smell of soap. 

As the sun rose over the walls of Alexandria, Daryl noticed a streak of red flash by and land on the roof of a house beside yours. Through the window, he saw it there perfectly - the red cardinal that you had gifted him with for luck, the symbol that had guided him all the way here, all the way back to you.  

He couldn’t help it, then - he grinned to himself. 

The next day, he found one of those picture frames that Aaron had gifted the group with that they largely had no use for, and he put your picture of the bird, still singed on one edge, inside of it. 

A while later, when the two of you were out on a run and he had a bit of time on his hands as you fell asleep - he edged a stick n poke tattoo into the skin of his forearm, outlining the bird as best he could with his very little artistic talent. When you saw it, you giggled - and he assured you that it was because he liked the look of it, most definitely not for luck. 

He didn’t need ‘luck’ anymore - not when he had you.

...

A/N: This is a stand-alone oneshot, and there will not be a follow up or a 'Part 2'. I have always intended for this to be a stand-alone story, so please do not ask for a follow up or a sequel in the comments. If you are going to comment, please comment about the material that has already been written. If you want to see more TWD fics from me, I have some posted on AO3 (which is linked in my pinned) but I don't currently have any of my other TWD fics posted on Tumblr. Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed this!

[skzthelomlhehe]

A lustful collab

Masterlist Total Masterlist

Tag reqs: @arestoucries

Genre: music, fluff, smut, romance, slice of life.

Warnings: sexual descriptions (as the genre suggests)- fingering, harsh language, bleeding, first time, unprotected sex.

Description: In love with your voice he asks for a collaboration. You invite him to your studio but seeing how he was gonna be late you decide to do... Questionable things. And alas he walks in on you doing that cuz you're dumb and forgot to lock the fucking door and things get spicy hehe~

A/N: Heyy! This is my first time writing at Tumblr and also my first take on smut that isn't roleplay lmao the story itself is mostly fluff with smut in between. Hope it doesn't get too stretchy eeee- I literally came up with the plot while listening to connected fr and got even more inspiration from MOVIE by JUNNY srs! anyways~ hope this little delulu one shot can feed yalls delulu hearts~ also PS: A warning is given before the smut starts JUST IN CASE idk why I added it but I did lmao

Vibe with:

It was a beautiful autumn noon. Birds chirping, people probably at home napping or at work or whatever. The street was empty and you were inside your room working on your new song at your parents' house. After a while of humming and singing, you put down your guitar and took off your headphones before looking out the window of your room.

A quiet and peaceful afternoon painted with golden hues of the pretty sunset. Perfect time to record your song. So you decided to take your things which included your guitar, phone, a big tripod and a black foldable chair.

You headed out to the yard with your hands full of stuff barely managing your balance and not accidentally tumbling over and risking every bit of fortune you spent on your set up.

Upon reaching, you successfully manage to put down your stuff in the correct position which was unusual given your extraordinarily clumsy nature. But oh well, luck was just on your side. After you were done with all the silly little labor you finally sat in your chair and started recording. The melody flew gracefully, your guitar cooperated and didn't buzz as your hands guided each note, your voice obeyed your pleas and didn't crack but escaped your lips soft and smooth. The rhymes flowed by as if it were a river devoid of any bounds and for once you didn't feel disrupted or out of breath. Everything went down smoothly which was, once again, quite unusual given your tendency of taking a thousand takes.

All this while, your eyes remained shut as if naturally. You couldn't open them and frankly, neither did you want to. You preferred the soft breeze that tickled your skin, making your hair flow just the tiniest bit. As your song came to an end, you slowly opened your eyes and switched off the recording. Just as you were about to check the video you just took, you were startled by a soft clap followed by a deep, husky yet smooth voice. One that you knew a bit too well. "That was so beautiful! You've got an amazing voice, mate!" The voice spoke out. You looked up, utterly shocked thinking your ears were playing tricks on you. But when you did look up, your heart skipped a beat. In a good way obviously!

There he stood, an averagely tall man, eyes sparkling as if millions of stars were held in them, the dimples at the end of the corner of his smile made you feel like you would drown in them and you honestly don't complain. His hair curled perfectly into a neat fuzz. These details, you knew it too well. A bit too well. Christopher, a well known musician who was the heart throb of many. He's your idol, someone you look upto a lot and also the one who inspired you to go against your family's disapproval and start a career in music. If not for him, you wouldn't be here making music right now.

you quickly put down your guitar on the chair and grabbed your phone stuffing it in your pocket while rushing to him who was standing behind the fence out on the sidewalk. "O-oh gosh thank you...! You flatter me!" You said flustered. You could feel your face getting hotter. Shy? Embarrassed? Flustered? Anything that falls into the similar synonym spectrum, you felt it.

"I'm serious! You make a great deal of a singer." He said, his smile Perking up hiding his eyes. He extended out his hand in a gesture of a shake, "I'm Chris by the way. Just moved here a few days back, nice to meet you!" And almost immediately like the silly fangirl you were, you held his hand, albeit gently unlike those psychos who don't know personal space and bowed "I-I'm Y/N!! It's very nice to meet you too sir!" And with that you just buried your self-esteem deep inside the ground. Sir? Seriously? You could do better Y/N.

Upon blurting out whatever you said, you were met with a rather charming chuckle. You looked up to see the man in front of you laughing, still holding your hand and covering a teeny bit of his smile with his other hand. "You're a funny one, Y/N!" He said, still having the after effects of the little laugh. He let go of your hand, you felt a little disappointed when he did so but you didn't bother to make an expression out of it. "So it seems you live around here? Ive heard you sing but never really saw you before." He spoke, possibly making small talks. "Ah no I used to live here. This is my parents' house, I come by every other week. I live 3 blocks away actually." You spoke quite calmly even though there was a storm raging inside your mind. But no one needs to know that except you and me right? Moving on!

"Ahh~ I see~ well! We'll still be seeing each other some time, no? Can I have your number? I don't really have many friends my age round here." He pulled out his phone and held it in front of you expecting you to type your number in. "o-oh sure..!" You took his phone rather abruptly cuz once again you're clumsy cuz why not~ and typed your number in. You made a quick call from his phone and saved your number in his. You handed him the phone before taking yours out and saving it as well. "great! So I'll text later yeah? I gotta run now, but I'll see you later?" He spoke, looking at you expectantly. You just nodded with a bright smile. "That's that then! See ya, mate!" He cheerfully bid you goodbye, turning away and looking at you one last time with a wink and waving his hands in a peace sign.

That was when you went into a faze. And the next thing you know, you're lying in bed, your stuff neatly organized. "So uhh... I was singing in the yard, someone came, said I sang great, the someone so happed to be my fucking crush and idol and he asked me for my number and he said he'll text me... He... He asked... He ASKED FOR MY FUCKING NUMBER OH MY FUCKING GOD IS THIS A DREAM?!?!?!" After taking your sweet sweet time processing whatever happened you started kicking your feet like a teeny tiny little girl in Love even though you're a fucking (your age) year old woman. (Y'all freaky minors I see you so you better get going)

And then all of a sudden amidst your delulu moment, you get jolted awake to reality by a text notification. When you open your screen your face lights up into a bright ass smile, heart in your eyes and just- delulu all over again.

And just like that you snatched yourself a date (not really) with your favourite local artist! How lucky aren't you? Anyways~ you looked at the clock and it was 4:16 pm already. You rushed up, swifting through your closet only to find nothing wearable. "Do I really not have anything here??? Why did I take everything there with me ugh!!!!" You whisper yelled cuz after your little yelling sesh earlier the last thing you want is for people (especially Chris) to think you're crazy. After failing to find anything wearable you quickly grabbed your things and drove off to your studio.

After a lot of deciding you finally found an outfit you wanted to wear and quickly headed into the shower. And after managing to shower, get dressed, put make up on and do any other finishing touches you were finally ready! You took one last look at yourself into the mirror and felt extremely self satisfied. The clock showed 5:35 pm and it takes about 15 minutes to get there by taxi and the last thing you want is to be late. So you hurried down and got yourself a ride and right to the cafe you went.

You've been to this cafe for a good long while now. It was your favourite spot to chill and the bells attached to the door was always a calming welcome for you. This time although, that same ring sent shivers down your spine. And you didn't know why. You were, as usual, greeted by a gentle young man who was pleased to see one of the regulars back again.

"a single seat again?" He asked as you entered. You shook your head, "not this time boy! I've got company" and soon a giggle left your lips followed by a confused, curious and pleased 'oh?' from the man. He smiled and led you to a comfortable seat. A perfect seat is what you considered it. A big glassed window which gave the perfect view of the lit up streets outside. The cafe was warm and cozy like its name. You took your coat off and draped it over the chair lean before taking a seat. After few minutes of waiting which seemed like hours your clock showed 5:56 pm. You were starting to get worried. Was he gonna ditch you? Were you gonna get stood up by a person you admire so much?

As you let yourself spiral into your overthinking, you were brought back to reality with a knock on the wooden table, "hello? Anyone there? Earth to Y/N!" You looked up, blood rising to your face making it warmer. "A-ah yes! S-sorry about that. I sorta uh... Lost myself there, heh." You mumbled, loud enough for him to hear albeit quite faint. "Right, it's all good!" The man took a seat in front of you, "lovely view." He said, looking out the window. "Ah... Lovely indeed." Your awestruck fangirl eyes stayed glued to this man's face, observing every little detail. His beautifully curly brown hair, big lips that stretched into a smile, that deep and gorgeous dimple that dug at the end of the corner of his smile. Lovely... He was more than just lovely.

"So... Which one of the view is lovely here, exactly?" You didn't realise he was looking at you. His right elbow rested on the table while his tilted head rested on his palm, his face painted with a shimmering smile.

You were dazed by the view in front of you, "You..." You muttered, your head falling off your palms, "N-no I mean both! I mean- no- the outside- or like no uh maybe both? Uh- ah! I don't know!" You hid your face within your hands and heard a soft chuckle. That chuckle tickled your ears turning them bright red.

After much awkward blabbering you guys finally got down to business. Having discussed a few of the details, you guys agreed to meet on the weekends in your studio since his new studio wasn't fully done yet. You both decided to discuss further details and make a contract on Saturday at your studio.

Time passed by in the blink of an eye. Before you know it, you guys have had chatted endless conversations in the meantime. Gotten much more closer. And before you knew it, your phone display showed 8:35 AM on a Saturday morning. Chris was supposed to arrive at 12:30 pm, grab lunch with you and then work on the song.

You looked around realising your room was a total mess. You had 4 hours to clean everything up, shower and get ready and you were quite determined.

You cleared everything up, every Speck of dust lying around was removed in what felt like an instant. You quickly took an everything shower. Washing your hair, shaving, skincare etc etc everything.

After all was done, you checked your phone again. The time showed 12:23 PM. You felt content, giving your chest a light pat of approval. You put on some casual clothes and put up your hair into a messy bun. You patted on some powder, a little blush, tad bit of eyeliner and some soft lip tint to tie it all together.

Just when you were done with everything, you heard your door bell ring. Anticipation grew with each step you took running to your front door. "coming!" You yelled.

Opening the door felt like opening it to a beam of light. You were greeted by a warm smile and a "Hey, pretty!" In the softest most endearing tone youve ever heard. It was like music to your ears. You replied with a "hey handsome~" as a giggle left both your lips.

You knew better than to delude yourself but right now... For a tiny bit... You wanted to think this was more than just some collaboration and something perhaps a little more special. Although getting to Collab with this man was a great deal of honor in itself.

You guys drove to the restaurant in his car. The way his veiny hands glided on the steering wheel made you feel things. The way he spoke, the way he sat there driving, the way he laughed, the way the wind ruffled his hair ever so softy, everything made butterflies rage inside your stomach.

You guys vibed to some music, both singing in tune as he drove. At the restaurant you both chatted while waiting for the food. Chris, curious of the food you were having, took a small bite and regretted immediately with how spicy it was. He coughed "good- lords! How do you eat that?" You chuckled. "or you're just too much of a baby to handle even this little bit of spice? You even have food on your face!" "Eh? Where?" He scanned through the corners of his lips trying to wipe the food away. Watching him struggle, you took a piece of tissue and leaned in to wipe it for him. It felt like time stopped, like some kind of a cliche rom com movie. You both stared at each other for a few moments before he cleared his throat. You sat back down clearing your throat as well.

After the lunch, you both came back to your place. For a second it was awkward but that tension was soon killed as he initiated a small talk that dragged into a conversation.

Getting home, you both talked about the collab. You both jotted down a small contract that his manager would review later to confirm it. But you guys were too excited to wait for any of that and decided to start working on the song.

You both presented ideas you guys had come up with in the meantime. While he took a look at the sheet of printed paperwork you switched on your computer. Time flowed like a river with clear path.

"Should we make some alterations in that part?" He spoke, pointing his pen towards the lit up computer screen. "Which one? This?" You moved your cursor towards the line and selected it. "No not that one, the one below. Here this-" without much thought, his hand trailed to the mouse and placed right about your hand. He clicked the line he had originally pointed to, "I think we could make it a little more feely here-" he paused and realised where his hand was. He looked at you, your face flushed a cute shade of pink. Seeing you, his face, too, flushed in a soft blush before he abruptly took his hand away. "R-right yeah we uh we could do that"

You looked away, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear as you bit your lower lip feeling a slight sense of disappointment having him pulled away. His hand was big on yours, the warm weight of it felt comforting. You've had your hand held by a lot of people, family, friends, exes. But this particular moment made you feel like your hand was on fire and frankly, so was your entire body.

You felt a wet slick in your lady down there. You quickly excused yourself to the restroom. You had considered that maybe it was... Something else ... But you had thought maybe it was just your period coming a day earlier. But once you had made it into the restroom, you realised, it was, in fact, what you had anticipated and that anticipation was definitely not your period.

You went back, things seemed a tad bit awkward. You didn't like it. You didn't like it at all. You hated the tension that had been created just because of a trivial matter like mistakenly putting his hand on yours while reaching for the mouse. Although the tension was there, you guys still managed to get some work done. After a while, Chris got a call from his manager asking him to get home since it was already 9:12 pm.

Time sure flew. You wished time would stop so you could spend more time with him but you knew you couldn't. So you swallowed down your disdain and walked him to the exit bidding him goodbye. It was bitter, but it is what it is.

You went back in finding yourself in a faze again. You could barely make sense of anything that was happening. You saved the progress on your computer and went straight to bed because frankly, you didn't have any energy left for anything else.

(just imagine some spicy stuff cuz idk how to write a wet dream 💀)

The next day, you woke up to your kitty feeling extra soaked. You groaned thinking it was the after effects of the wet dream you just had. But to your utter surprise and absolute agony, it was none other than that annoying cousin you despised. That's right ladies, you got your period. Periodt.

You took a quick shower before cleaning up last night's mess. You knew your cramps were about to HIT today. And you dreaded it. You could barely move around the entire day because of the excruciating pain you were in. No wonder your sex drive was so high and you felt pain in your waist for the past week.

Time ticked to 6 PM and it was about time Chris arrived. And just on time, you heard your doorbell ring. You tried your best not to look too groggy. You opened the door to his bright smile again, all the tension out the window. You smiled back, your abdomen almost on the verge of busting.

"Hey... You alright?" He asked, his eyes glistening in concern. "Y-yeah... I just got my period today and the cramps are wild." You replied. "oh... Then... Should I leave? I mean-.. I don't wanna cause you any more pain" you couldn't believe how painfully nice he was. Gosh he was just... So considerate. But you didn't want to miss this opportunity. You didn't want to wait an entire week. "No! No it's okay! I can do it! Don't worry!" You blurted. "alright then. But let me know if you're in any pain ok?" He wanted to make you feel comfortable and just him being so considerate made you feel like you could get through a thousand cramps.

You nodded before letting him in. You guys started working on the song again. But unfortunately, as optimistic as you were before, you couldn't help but feel the pain resurface ever so often. The pain felt harder each time it returned. At some point you couldn't help but groan, clenching at your tummy.

"Are you... Are you ok? You don't look too good." He held your shoulder ever so softly. "Ye-yeah I just... Need to use the restroom real quick. I'll be back." "Sure, take your time."

Just as you were about to stand up, your legs gave out and you tripped. Chris, who was right there, happened to catch you in time. Had you fell, your head wouldve went straight to the corner of the table cracking it open. Your heart raced. But, you couldn't tell if it was out of fear or the fact that you were practically groping his chest. Or maybe it was both.

You got up in a rush, your head felt fuzzy. "ah im- im so sorry! I didn't mean to!" "No- no it's alright! You were about to fall so I just... It's okay I don't mind... I mean... Uhh I would mind if it was some random person who just got all over me without permission but uhh what I mean is it's alright I didn't think anything of it..." He looked away turning his head, his ears a bright red.

You hurried off to the restroom and locked the door. "Stupid stupid! You stupid girl! Agh why did you have to fall on him??" You whisper yelled. Your hands still felt warm from the sensation. Your nipples had perked up and you felt aroused out of your mind. But you didn't want to feel it. You didn't want to be a creep and make him uncomfortable.

Time skip ...

A month had passed now. You guys got even more closer now. In the meantime you had many more physical contacts that ignited sparks within you. The sessions didn't last in tensed awkwardness anymore and you guys were having fun.

You were checking out your calender as usual to check out if you had something important in the coming days. Your period for this month had ended two days ago, you were supposed to have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday and the rent was due on Thursday. Everything was checked out. You looked at your phone that showed 10:34 am on a Saturday.

You suddenly get a text and your face brightens up when you see the sender of it.

If this was a while ago, you would find it illegal to even think of getting coffee with THE Christopher. Asking him to bring along coffee and having him treat you to pastry as an apology just would've felt illegal and a faraway day dream. But here we are.

You flopped down on your bed, scrolling through the gallery in your phone. It had endless pictures of Chris. Even more of him than you, your family and friends combined.

You squealed with every picture as you realised again and again how attractive he was and this very man was coming over every other weekend for a collab. It was just... So unreal to you.

{Warning: here the smut starts so if you're not ok with that please skip until you see a divider. Thank you.}

As you were thinking of all this, you found yourself feeling a tad bit aroused. You put your phone down as you glided your hand through your body gradually sliding in down inside your shorts.

You rubbed your clit that had been a swollen bud and your hole had been leaking ever since, thirsting for a little action. You pulled your shirt up revealing your breasts as they bounced and you pulled your pants down. Your pants hung by your ankle as you slowly rubbed your entrance gently.

It throbbed. It wanted more. You started thrusting your finger in. First your middle, then both your middle and ring finger and soon your index as well. You gradually became a moaning mess. Occassionally calling out Christopher's name under your breath as you fondled your boobs.

Oh how you wished he were here with you. As you were in your moments of pleasure laying unbeknownst of anything, a thud jolted you awake from your fantasy.

You looked towards the door of your room realising the clear view of your kitty you had put on to anyone who stood there. Horror overcame you as you realised who was standing at the door. Chris. His bag had fallen, possibly due to shock of seeing you like that.

His face was utterly surprised. You quickly closed your widely spread apart legs scrambling to hide but it just didn't work out. "h-how are you here?!" You asked, shame and guilt overcoming you. "We-well the door was unlocked and I called out to you but you didn't hear me an-and I just-" his face brightened red. You looked down unknowingly and realised he had a painful bulge that looked like it would pop out any moment now.

"y-you... Why are you..." You pointed, he looked down and quickly hid it. "I'm oh lords I'm so sorry! I didn't-"

As if your body moved on its own, you got off the bed and walked closer to him. He stumbled as you did, "wha- what are you-"

"don't you..." You shut him off, "don't you feel repulsed? You heard everything didnt you?" "I- I mean I did hear you... Calling my name but.. uh.. no no... I ... I don't feel repulsed... Not in the slightest!" He blurted out. You weren't usually the bold type but today, for some reason, you felt unstoppable. You took the bag of coffee from his hand and set it down on the shelf near the door. "So... You're turned on by what you saw?" He looked away turning his head before softly nodding. That nod in itself made you even bolder. You slowly glided your hands to his shoulders, letting your arms rest around his neck as you leaned closer making him flinch.

"Come on, Chris... Look at me..." You whispered. "N-no I..." "But... I want you to look at me." You looked at him with sparkly eyes. He looked at you clenching his fists trying his best not to lose himself.

"Do you... Want to touch me...?"

"I shouldn't..."

"it's not about should or shouldn't... Do you want to? Or not?"

He clenched his jaw, unable to speak anything. You leaned in closer to his face. "if you don't want it... Push me away right now..."

And with that, you leaned in even more. Both of your lips not even an inch away from each other. You could feel his warm breath against your skin. You felt so... So turned on. You'd have thought he would push you away. But to your utter surprise...

He grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you in to a kiss. You flinched and were caught off guard but soon gave in to the passionate kiss. He was rushed, but not too much. It felt good. Your lips touched in perfect harmony. You mewled as you felt his tongue on your lips. Without any complaints you let him in.

Your tongues twirled in a beautiful rhythm. Your breaths clashed with each other. You grabbed onto him a little tighter, pulling him in towards the bed. He pushed you on the bed, kissing you again.

You broke the kiss, unbuckling his pants revealing his throbbing member. His dick was nice and long. Perfectly thick and girthy. You panted at the sight of it and your pussy throbbed. You wanted him. You want to take him.

You got up and pushed him down on the bed as you got on your knees. "Can I...?" You asked and he nodded biting his lips. You could see it in his eyes. Just how eager he was. He huffed as you blowed softly on his tip.

You rubbed it against your soft cheek making him groan. He was already overflowing with precum. You slowly glided your finger through his member. It both scared and aroused you to see his size and how veiny it was. It was throbbing and flinching every now and then.

"just... Do it alreadyy.." he begged and you couldn't wait to comply. You slowly started shoving it inside your face. Licking every bit of it. He threw his head back grasping onto your hair, pushing your head further down. You moaned again finding it incredibly hard to take it all in.

You choked as his tip hit the back of your throat and he let you go instantly. "Ah! Im sorry! Are you ok?" He asked pulling you closer to your face cupping your cheeks. "Yeah.. I'm.. I'm okay. I just don't have much experience with deep throating." You spoke still catching your breath. "it's ok if you don't want to. I don't wanna force you to do something you don't enjoy."

"no it's alright. I want to do it. So just relax." You went back to his groin. This time, taking it slow. Rubbing his member and licking the tip slowly preparing to him all in. Steadily you start putting it inside your mouth. It felt weird at first and you felt overwhelmed but you were determined. You wanted him to feel good.

It gave you immense pleasure when you heard his groans and moans. "Fuck baby you're so hot..." He moaned under his breath. That just aroused you even more. You went back up to his face, kissing him passionately. He pushed you down on the bed and took off his shirt.

Good lords that was the most sexiest and hottest thing you've ever seen. He soon made his way down between your thighs. First kissing your inner thighs along with soft bites that sent shivers down your spine. You yelped a moan when you felt his fingers circling your poor swollen bud and moaned even more when you found him licking it. You thanked your soundproof walls. You thanked yourself who worked endlessly to afford that soundproofing. It just meant you could moan as much as you wanted.

"Shit... Chris... Im... Fuck im so close...!" You mewled. He came up to your face, kissing you relentlessly again as if he was just going to devour you. "can... Can I put it in..?" He asked with these adorable puppy eyes. You felt his tip rubbing against your entrance. "yes.. god... Yes please... I need to Chris... I need you so much... Fuck just put it in already..." You moaned. You couldn't take it anymore. You needed him. You needed him so bad.

"but... There's no condom? Should I go buy some?" He said pulling away and almost getting up. You wrapped your arms around him and pulled him closer. "Fuck condoms just do it! Im safe." (A/N: please use condoms even if you're safe. Your partner might not be safe 💀)

And without much ado, he started shoving it in. It was your first time. You didn't expect it to hurt so much. A drop of tear trickled down your face as you gasped in shock. "agh... Ah fuck... Fuck fuck fuck that hurts ngh..." You cried. It hurt. It hurt so much. You could feel your hymen tearing apart. Blood trickled down your hole. "fuck... Im sorry... Just... A little more... I promise it'll feel better..." Chris reassured you. He pulled you into a tight hug kissing your shoulders and neck. You cried in pain. It was even more painful than you had imagined.

You wrapped both your hands and legs around him. It was painful, but you wanted to keep going. After a while, it was in. His whole dick was completely inside you, wrapped by your walls. "I'm in... Im in..." He huffed. A wave of relief flooded over you. It hurt, but it was starting to feel a little better now.

He gently started moving. Each thrust started making the pain leave your body. And before you knew it, you were overcome by pleasure. Once what was a cry of pain turned to cry of pleasure.

You moaned loudly over and over again calling out his name. "Fuck angh Chris...! Aah... That... That feels so good nngh.." you moaned.

He thrusted inside you, relentlessly. "good fuck baby you feel so damn good... Oh gosh you're so pretty... You're so beautiful... Fuck I love you so much..." He moaned back. You were caught off guard. "you... You what...?" Another tear trickled down your face. Your heart raced like crazy. "I... Im sorry but... I just happened to feel it I... I don't know..." He stopped thrusting feeling hesitant. You smiled before placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Why'd you stop, silly? I love you too... I always have... It feels like a dream to be here like this with you..." You pull him closer. He sniffles, his eyes teary and he smiles before kissing you and thrusting again.

He hugged you, kissing and sucking on your nipples leaving hickeys where only he can see. You suddenly felt a knot form inside your belly. And you knew what it was. "Shit Chris... Im... Im close... Im so close..." You mewled. "I'm... Im close too... Let's... Let's cum together yeah?" He groaned. "Yeah... Yeah let's do that..." You huffed.

Before you know it, his pace fastened and so did both of your grunts and moans. The room filled with noises you made and the noises of skin slapping, kissing and sucking.

And at last, that knot loosened and you felt yourself flinching and trembling and reached your climax. He quickly pulled it out and came on your belly before falling on you. Both of your pants unsteady. He turned to lay down on the bed, your head on his arm. "Fuck... That felt so good..." He huffed. "Yeah... It did.."

.......................

{smut ends here lmao}

After a while of laying there and catching up on breathing. You both decided to take a shower together and clean up. Having done that, you both made your way to the bed and laid next to each other.

"So... You like me?" Chris asked as he caressed your head gently. In embarrassment, you hid your face in his mascular chest. "We-well... I've been a huge fan of yours for a while now and... I've always liked you but... Ever since we've met... I couldn't help but develop feelings more than that of a fan to her idol..." You replied shyly.

"that's... Quite nice to hear actually..." He smiled. You looked at him, your chin rested on his chest. "what about you?" You asked.

"hmm... I've actually seen you before. You performed in the 'Railway Bar and Restaurant' right?"

"Oh yeah... I did. Don't tell me... That was the first time you saw me?"

"I did! I was amazed by your performance. Shortly after I saw you all over my tok tik and tube-you (names are funny cuz I'm pretending to be funny hehe). I really liked the music you made and I wanted to meet your for the longest time. You caught my eye like none other. So when I met you again, I couldn't help but feel this... Attraction towards you."

Your face flushed red. You couldn't believe what you were hearing. It felt like you were dreaming. "So... What are we now...?" You asked, unsure if you should ask to begin with. "I don't know... What do you want us to be?" He asked. "I... Kinda want us to date..." You spoke hesitantly. It felt illegal to ask him that.

But surprisingly enough again, he chuckled. "Sure let's do that." You looked at him in disbelief. He was smiling. And he wasn't lying. He wasn't kidding, he wasn't playing. He really wanted it too. You couldn't help but giggle. He placed a soft kiss on your forehead and then on your lips.

Time skip again....

Another few months later, the collab was finally done and posted. It turned out to be a super hit. Both your and his fandom went crazy over it. At first you both wanted to keep your relationship private but one day a fan saw you guys on a date in a cafe. You were scared his fan would be mad and throw a tantrum but what you didn't expect was that she would start squealing and saying how she was expecting it because of the collab.

A few weeks later you guys came out public. There were two sides of the fans. One side was toxic. They bashed you both for the choice you made. But the majority were nice and supported your decisions.

It was overwhelming, to say the least, but you guys were together and that's what mattered. Both your families loved each other as well. Although your family was a bit hesitant at first, they soon caved in to both your career and your relationship.

Things were looking up and you were happier than ever. Your face was all over different social media platforms, in a good way. Your popularity increased significantly and people loved the music you made.

Now the rest of the story? That's for you to write :3

This is the end of "The lusfut Collab" and I hope you guys enjoyed it! See you again with another oneshot! Byeee!

[accio-victuuri]

one day i will write a proper per episode post about yibo’s show, but right now, just sharing some really heart felt reactions from people who watched the documentary. 🫶🏼

yibo is so easy to love if you just give him the chance!

(P1) "exploring the unknown" is a must-see for every postgraduate candidate preparing for the exam. I originally watched it with the mentality of watching a documentary about wilderness science, but after watching it, I realized that I was narrow-minded. This is not just a documentary about survival in the wilderness. In the journey of exploring the unknown, we are often driven by a desire to conquer, eager to challenge the limits and prove our strength. However, there is such a documentary that subverts the traditional concept of exploration. It is not about how to conquer nature, but about how to coexist harmoniously with nature and how to love every inch of land on this planet. The protagonist of this documentary is none other than Wang Yibo. He was not challenging the authority of nature, but challenging his own limits. I really like what he said: "I never believed that I couldn't complete it, it was just a matter of time." This sentence really gave me a lot of thoughts. Looking back at the time when I was taking the postgraduate entrance examination, if I had seen such a documentary, I would really have less anxiety. In the process of the examination, everyone is challenging their own limits. Because I took the postgraduate entrance examination relatively late at that time, I didn't have much time left. At that time, I was anxious and uneasy. Fortunately, I met a group of very good people at that time, which allowed me to quickly get out of anxiety. The postgraduate entrance examination is a long and challenging process, which requires you to have a firm will and good qualities.

(P2) In order to get to know my daughter's idol better, I watched it again..."Exploring the Unknown" made us feel a different Wang Yibo.

In the past, we felt more about him in film and television works, and documentaries are different from film and television works, because the characters in film and television works are more about the plot settings, while the characters in documentaries are closer to the characters themselves. But the documentary is different from ordinary documentaries. It is not just about recording scenes and processes, but about challenging and experiencing the extreme geographical environment.

First of all, you must have the courage to challenge, and dare to challenge, especially when facing an unknown and uncontrollable environment, people will involuntarily produce fear, which really tests the courage and courage of the participants, and in "Exploring the Unknown", Wang Yibo showed it vividly, allowing us to feel the power from him. Just like what Wang Yibo said in the film, "I used to think that every time I did something new, the first time in my life would become less, but after trying, I found that there would be infinite first times. Secondly, you need to have super physical fitness. The complex natural environment of Ba Wang Ling, what you will encounter and what will happen in the process of chasing gibbons are all unpredictable and uncontrollable, and the necessary condition to face it calmly is that your physical fitness must be absolutely super. Long-distance hiking and swimming, Wang Yibo's super physical fitness is fully displayed. Super physical fitness is not trained overnight, nor is it obtained by persistence for one or two years. It is the result of more than ten years of accumulation, perseverance and self-discipline. It also shows the superhuman perseverance.

(P3) I have a new understanding of the stars my daughter likes. Last night, I watched the documentary "Exploring the Unknown" created by Wang Yibo. This is the first time I have watched a star program carefully from beginning to end. Although Wang Yibo's name has worn calluses on my ears, why do I say that? Because my daughter is his die-hard fan. After watching the program last night, I really got to know him and it really touched me. In the Hainan Bawangling Nature Reserve with a temperature of up to 35 degrees, we all know that the temperature is 35 degrees, but people may feel nearly 45 degrees. At the same time, they are also tested by various animals. In such an environment, in order to throw a rope to the opposite tree, he threw it for a whole hour, doing repeated actions again and again, and thinking about the skills and strength of the actions again and again. In the middle, the explorer said to take a break and come back, but he did not stop and still insisted on throwing it down. Seeing this makes me admire him, and it makes me understand why he can succeed. His tenacity, perseverance, his determination to achieve his goal, his fearlessness of hardships, and his courage in the face of adversity are destined to make him successful. He is the spiritual representative of the younger generation. I remember his donations and on-site disaster relief during the 21st flood in Henan. He is a public figure with a sense of responsibility and mission. So my daughter likes him, which makes me feel relieved. Because I believe that she can definitely draw more positive energy from Wang Yibo, because she likes him, she will definitely make herself better.

[hotvintagepoll]

This is a three-way poll. Only one of these women will continue to the next round of the bracket.

Propaganda

Deborah Kerr (Bonjour Tristesse, An Affair to Remember, The King and I)— For several decades she held the record for most Oscar nominations without a win (6 in total), and she was a prolific leading lady throughout the 40s and 50s. She's best known today for the romance An Affair to Remember with Cary Grant, and as the governess in The King and I. Many people have this erroneous perception of her as extremely prim, proper, and virginal, but this could not be further from the truth. When she first came to Hollywood under MGM she was typecast into boring decorative roles, but broke sexual boundaries for herself and Hollywood generally in From Here to Eternity, when she made out (horizontally!) with Burt Lancaster (on top of him!) in the famous Beach Scene. She went on to play many sexually conflicted women, a character type that would define most of her post- Eternity work. She continued to break Hays Code boundaries with Tea and Sympathy, which addresses homosexuality/homophobia head-on, and even did a topless scene in The Gypsy Moths 1969!! One of the only classic stars to do so. She deserves a more nuanced and frankly a hotter legacy than she currently has!!!

Keiko Awaji (Stray Dog, A Japanese Tragedy, When a Woman Ascends the Stairs)— Her role as Harumi— a dancer who lives with her mom and will go to incredible lengths for one nice dress— is so fucking killer. she more than holds her own against Toshiro Mifune, the incredible sense of dread and foreboding in their scenes has really stuck with me

Hazel Scott (Broadway Rhythm, Rhapsody in Blue)—ok ok let me tell you about Hazel Scott. She was a Trinidadian piano genius. By the age of 3 she could play the piano by ear. She would play jazzed-up versions of classics in nightclubs and could sing too! She appeared in five movies, and used her influence as a piano prodigy to improve Black representation in film—she turned down offensive parts, demanded equal pay, and always wore her own costumes to ensure she was portrayed as glamorous and beautiful. She was the first African-American woman to host her own television show, The Hazel Scott Show. She stood up for civil rights and was an overall icon! If you want to watch her being a genius, here she is playing two pianos at once. And here's this one that shows off her consummate glamor! [videos beneath the cut]

This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Deborah Kerr:

I think she was one of my first crushes before I realised I was bi in The King and I when I watched it as a kid honestly. The kissing scene in From Here to Eternity is iconic for a reason. Actually tried to learn the accents for the characters she was playing if they weren't English which is more than pretty much anyone else was doing then. Played very restrained characters who frequently seemed to be desperate not to be so restrained. Did horror movies without venturing into hagsploitation tropes. Gave Marni Nixon the credit she deserved for her share of the singing in The King and I.

Anne Larsen is a peak late 1950s bisexual with big MILF energy. Have you seen the behind the scenes pics of her wearing a suit?? Have you????? Vote Deb as Anne Larsen.

Nominated for an Oscar six (6) times and never won, but besides her having actual talent (hot), and besides her looking Like That (very hot, also beautiful), she was always playing women who are, like, crazy repressed. Which makes it fun and easy for me to read these characters as queer. Icon!!!! You know what's hot? Playing ambiguously gay in vintage Hollywood.

Her face and talent and body, yes, ofc, duh. But also!!! Her HANDS!!!! I may be but a simple lesbian, but she is the best hactor (hand actor) that ever lived and that's HOT! For propriety's sake I feel I must redact a large portion of my commentary on this subject. Anyway. She's hot in her most famous roles (mentioned above), and also some of her sexiest hacting is on display in An Affair to Remember (her hand on the bannister when Cary Grant kisses her off-screen??? HELLO???), Tea and Sympathy (when she's trying to persuade Tom not to go out and she keeps flexing her hands like she wants to reach out to him but can't??? ALLY BEHAVIOR! WE STAN!), and The Innocents (which opens and closes with extended shots of her hands bc director Jack Clayton was also an ally and he did that for ME). Much of her appeal also lies in the fact that she often played deeply repressed characters and you know what's hot? When those uptight characters finally unravel. It's sexy. It's cathartic. It's erotic. Plus, she's beautiful to look at in both black & white and technicolor, and the more of her films you see, the more you can't help but fall in love!

Literally is in thee most famously sexy scene of all time (or maybe just during the hays code era which is what we're talking about HELLO), which is the beach scene with Burt Lancaster in from here to eternity. To quote a tumblr post of a screen capture of a tweet of a video of joy behar on the view: "y'know, there used to be movies where they were kissing on the beach... From Here to Eternity. They're kissing-- Burt Lancaster and Deborah Kerr are Kissing on the Beach and then the WAVES crash!! You know exactly what they did!"

She might have a reputation of being chaste and virginal or whatever, but we all know it's the quiet ones who are certifiable FREAKS

Keiko Awaji:

Hazel Scott:

[anxiouspotatorants]

Actually you know what I need to rant about this: while literati is technically a good girl x bad boy dynamic it is written so incredibly well and avoids so many pitfalls and stereotypes that it makes a good girl x bad boy hater like myself (I’m only half joking — I don’t think any trope is inherently good or bad but I tend to dislike most pairings with this dynamic) fall head over heels for their story and relationship.

So much of what makes the two of them work is the contrast between how others perceive them and how they truly are. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people who understand who Rory is as a person (Lorelai, Lane, Paris, Richard and Emily to a certain degree for starters), but she's constantly met with the expectation that she just does good and is supposed to make everyone proud 24/7. Stars Hollow as a group especially are big on this, as seen f. ex. through how Taylor takes Rory's one comment about an inappropriate DVD and twists the whole thing into a censorship crusade and makes Rory its poster-child even though she wants nothing to do with it and tells him so repeatedly. But instead of hearing Rory disagree with him (like he would Lorelai and Luke) he assumes that she actually agrees with him - and why shouldn't she when she's the perfect sunshine paragon of good who would never disagree with her elders? Also her grandparents treat her as incredibly fragile and childlike, like she must be too innocent to ever do anything wrong and so whenever she does something it has to be somebody else's fault (usually Lorelai, but occasionally Jess or whoever else was present). Time and time again Rory is treated like something innocent and naive and weak — but not by Jess. He sees her as a person.

And it obviously goes the other way too. Jess is treated like shit by pretty much everyone else. Either people hate him unprovoked or very much provoked (he did do a lot of pranks in his first few weeks and while I'm a Dean-hater I'm not blind to how much Jess picked fights with him), or they’ve simply given up on him. He tells Rory himself that every authority figure he had back in New York gave up on him too, from teachers to principals to his very own mother. But Rory doesn’t treat him like a lost cause, she treats him like the smart, brilliant and asshole-ish teen that he is. By having faith in him she also often holds him more accountable than others. Where f. ex. Lorelai or the other adults just roll their eyes, Rory physically drags Jess into doing his shifts at the diner. While others write him off, Rory chews Jess’ ear out for not helping Luke more and for willfully making enemies out of the Stars Hollow adults.

They don't put each other on pedestals or below each other. Jess doesn’t try to make a sinner out of Rory and she doesn’t try to make a saint out of him. There’s genuine respect between them. They expect each other to have integrity and treat others with kindness and honesty, and the rest is good old chemistry and common interests.

I particularly love how in so many of their scenes (especially pre-relationship) when they spend time alone they just get to be these goofy nerdy kids. They argue about controversial authors and dig through records shops and eat hot dogs and make fun of each other and try to make each other laugh. It’s not just sexual chemistry as it too often is in a dynamic like this (and often uncomfortably sexual when writing teenagers - looking at you Gossip Girl), and not just well written intellectual chemistry — they have platonic chemistry too. A hell of a lot of it actually.

While I don’t think ASP wrote them through a purely deconstructionist lens on the good girl x bad boy dynamic (if she did plan on writing the dynamic at all), there is something to be said about how where many around them treat them like stereotypes they treat each other like people. To so many people, Rory is a perfect small town princess, a little miss sunshine with booksmarts for days but too delicate and sweet for anything with grit and weight. To a lot of the same people and many more Jess is a pathetic brutish and maniacal lost cause, hell personified in a chainsmoking leather-wearing teenager. But to each other they are actual human beings. Kind and mean and flirtatious and scared and reckless and smart. Rory really thinks that with the right motivation and mindset Jess can be the kind who does (and at the end wrote) incredible things. Jess really believes that with a little more practice and support to step out of her comfort zone she can be the amazing journalist she wishes to be.

They don’t have this stupid «we’re so bad for each other but we can’t stay away» thing that too many trope users rely on and don’t even justify in the plot. Everyone else might think they’re not fit for each other, but they knew they were each other’s person from the very first day.

[pagetsgirl]

tutoring

contains smut!! mdni

warnings: smut, giving head, fucking your professor, office sex, shitty writing ngl

pairing: alex blake x f!reader (professor x student dynamic)

summary: Alex Blake's star student needs some tutoring, which turns rather spicy

a/n: dont be afraid to reach out to me if you have any prompt/drabble suggestions, but i’m not sure when i’ll get to them since im really busy with school

read on ao3 or below the cut

For the entire year you’ve been nothing but the most perfect student. You got full marks, was never late, always turned assignments in on time, and you were actually nice to anyone who sat around you in class.

So it came to you as a surprise, when in your second year, your linguistics professor, dr. Alex Blake, told you that you might need some tutoring, so you could get ahead of everyone else in class. You had her last year as well, and to say you had a crush on her was an mild understatement. So to spend more one-on-one time with her… it was an offer too good to say no to.

It quickly became your favourite part of the week. Every Friday evening at 6:50pm, just after your last class, walking towards her office so you’d be there 7:00pm, and then leave with pain in your heart at 8:30pm, while every bone in your body was shouting at you to chat with her for just a little longer. Your ears dying to hear her voice just one more time before going to bed, your eyes wanting to look at her once more, your hands wanting to roam over her body, discovering every curve and freckle on her delicate skin.

This Friday was no different. Almost speeding down the corridors so you could get to her office a little early, so that you two could catch up just a little more before starting the tutoring.

Arriving there at 6:55, which is a record, you knocked at her door, waiting for her approval of coming inside.

“It’s open!” Her slightly raspy voice sounded muffled from where you were standing. But even that could make your knees weak. The things she would whisper in almost the same tone, just a tat more sulkier, as her hands roamed over your body, her strap made hard thrusts into your-

“Are you coming inside or not?” A voice shook you out of your daydream, as Alex Blake stood there in her doorframe, looking down at you.

“Oh yeah, uhm of course,” You franticly speak out, putting your entire linguistics education to shame.

You followed her inside, your eyes focused on her ass, I mean her walls filled with interesting books you couldn’t wait to dive into (same goes for her ass, but that’s just a tat… inappropriate).

The rest of the lesson went smoothly, as you put your feelings on the side line, and fully focussed on the things she was explaining to you.

The last couple of minutes you get a little side tracked, now talking about your hobbies, as her hand brushed past hers as you were explaining how sharks can’t get cavities and some sharks can glow in the dark.

When it finally gets to the time where you should leave, she walks you to the door. As you turn your back towards her, you hear her say; “You think I didn’t notice you staring at my ass and boobs all semester?”

Your face turns a bright red, as you slowly turn around. “Fuck,” You mutter under your breath. She walks closer, and closer to you, her hands eventually landing on her hips.

She looked down at you, her eyes filled with something that almost looked like… lust?

“Professor,” You mutter out, your hands still awkwardly on your sides. “Tell me you don’t want this, baby,” She whispers, her hot breath brushing over your ear as she moves closer to you.

“Please, I want this,” You whisper out, your voice raspy from desperation.

“Good, then it’s Alex or mommy for you, pretty girl,”

Just as those words left her lips, she pushed them on yours, absolutely taking your breath away. It was soft, but she was also so dominating. It was everything you’ve ever dreamt of, and more. Way, and way more.

Alex pushed you backwards until she has you pinned to the door, her hands now roaming close to the bottom of your sweater. Your hands moving to tangle into her brown hair that was framing her face. “You sure you want to do this, baby?” The professor said as she pulled away.

You desperately nod your head, as your hands attempt to pull her face closer again.

“No, darling, I have to have vocal consent,” her hands played with the bottom of your shirt. “I- please, Alex, I need you so bad, please mommy,” The moment she heard that last word leave your lips, she pushed her lips to yours again, sliding her tongue into your mouth, exploring every single centimetre that she could reach. Her hands slipped into your sweater, discovering every curve until she reached your breasts.

Her lips travelled south, softly biting your neck. “Gosh, you’re so gorgeous for me, baby,” her voice radiated a warmth through you, that ended up all the way into your pussy.

She bit into your skin, making you let out a soft moan. “Please, mommy, I need more,” You pant out, your hands pushing her head down. “Shhh baby, I’ll get there, I promise,”

Her teasing didn’t seem to end, leaving a countless amount of hickeys and bite marks all over your neck.

Finally, after what seemed both hours and seconds, her hands grasped onto the sweater. “Can I take this off?” The brunette looked into your half closed eyes, her eyes filled with nothing but love and need. “Yeah, please,” the words came harder than you ever could’ve expected.

Finally, she took off your shirt. She stood there, allowing herself to take in this moment, cause who knows when the next time will be when she can see you like this (which will most likely be next Friday, if not sooner).

Your needy hands pulled onto the rim of her shirt. “Off,” you murmured. All Alex just did was grant you a smile and the little nod that allowed you to pull the shirt over her head. Your eyes scanned over her body, desperate to remember absolutely everything about her. Every freckle, curve and ‘imperfection’ that was scattered over her skin.

“You done staring, baby?”

“Mm, you’re really pretty,” you whisper, as your hands wander over her exposed skin.

“Oh, well thank you baby.” She kissed the tip of your nose, making you let out a small giggle. “I think you’re really pretty as well.”

Her hands slide towards your ass, “Take them off, please,” You practically beg.

“Your wish is my command,”

She quickly pulled down your trousers and underwear, throwing it somewhere on the floor. The linguist picked you up with ease and carried you to her desk, where she put you on.

The brunette immediately dove into your pussy, eating you eat like it was your last meal. Her tongue lapping up your juices.

It was just embarrassing as to how close you already were. Your thighs were shaking, you back arching and your hands pushing her head impossibly closer to where you needed her the most. “Mommy, I’m so close, please,” You moan out.

“Are you coming inside or not?” A voice shook you out of your daydream, as Alex Blake stood there in her doorframe, looking down at you.

[blindvogel]

I was awoken by this scene in my head at 6 in the morning. Truly, it is Dragon Age hell up here in my brain once again, and Emmrich is the star.

Musings on our intimate and soft necromancer, and a first kiss for my Rook, under the cut.

A moment caught

Kamari enjoys the fact that she can indulge Emmrich from time to time, share a pot of tea, chat and then watch him put on a record on his gramophone and slowly spin with him around the library. She would lie if she would say there wasn’t a selfish thought there too. Being close to him, holding his hand even this formally - it sates a part of her that hungers for connection. His, specifically. And tonight is not any different, until it is. 

They bump into his desk and for a moment their dance is halted. Even time seems to stand still. Kamari feels like Emmrich is looking at her face but sees a statue, a painting, a moment caught. His eyes are so soft and she can not help but freeze like a halla captured by a hunter’s snare. Then he lets go of her hand, brings his up to her face. His thumb brushes over her cheekbone following the smattering of freckles as if it were constellations, slow and soft. She barely dares to breathe as his touch follows the curve of her cheek and agonizingly slow along her jaw to her chin. His eyes follow his finger to her lips, linger as his thumb runs over her bottom lip with the gentlest pressure. Kamari sighs, her lips part. And Emmrich snaps out of the moment he had found himself in. She watches his warm brown eyes widen and fly to hers, then his face go ghostly pale before the blood rushes back into his cheeks, his ears, his face turn almost crimson. Now it is his turn to be frozen in place - Kamari imagines his mind is furiously spinning, looking for the right words to explain, excuse. Yet it provides her an opening, another moment. 

Her hand lifts as if to mirror his previous movement, fingertips tracing the line of his cheekbone. His skin is warm, almost hot to the touch, red with the flush of embarrassment. When her fingers slide down and find his jaw they also find light stubble, a little rough and rasping as they drag over it to his chin. She can feel him tremble as she pauses, her touch lingers just below his lips. His tongue darts out, nervously moistening them and catching her attention. Here too she finds herself mirroring him, and in return sees him swallow. 

The moment between them stretches as the gramophone continues to play, only half-noticed by her in the periphery. Kamari’s eyes slide up to meet Emmrich’s, still wide, still warm and brown but now also full of stunned anticipation.

She leans in then, grateful that when they bumped into the table Emmrich sat, sparing her some of the trouble of bridging their height difference. Her nose rubs along his as she angles her head just so, until the soft hairs of his mustache tickle her skin and her lips find his. 

They’re warm and soft, just as she had imagined, and taste faintly of bergamot, of the tea they had earlier. Then they move against hers, reciprocating the kiss. 

Kamari finds herself pulled closer, pressed against his chest. She can feel his heart hammering against her rib cage as if begging to be let in. There is space there, she thinks absently as her mind is mostly occupied by the kiss. Before it goes rather blank when his mouth parts hers, his tongue tentatively exploring. 

Until the clatter of bones breaks the moment when Manfred returns from the kitchen with more tea. As Emmrich shoots up to his full height releasing her, Kamari stumbles backwards, catches herself. Catches her breath, perhaps some of her wits. Meanwhile Emmrich’s face is a journey of flickering emotions until it settles on something apologetic. 

Like a halla, she turns on her heel and flees before she can hear him utter any words of regret.