#also buck's luck is reserved for life and death situations or to his loved ones don't at me

[thiswreckageivebecome]

The Winter Soldier is Still Here (Part 28- “The Beginning of the End”) (Bucky/Winter Soldier x Fem!reader)

Word Count: 2127

Warnings: None

Author’s Note: Short, but I finally wrote and posted something!!

Masterlist

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BUCKY POV

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As I said the words and I felt consciousness ease out of my body, I sensed her pause, just for a millisecond at my words. I hadn't told her I loved her before, not the actual words, but I knew it was true beyond the shadow of a doubt. She had said she loved me too as she was coming out from under the sedation. My last thoughts would be of that as I began to feel the weight of everything lift off of me and I drifted away in peace.

NATASHA POV

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We were making our way to where she was being held, Barnes of course was supposed to be with her. As we were walking, I just barely heard a ferocious snarl, "FIGHT BACK!" I recognized the voice, despite its new and darker edge. I took off in a sprint, everyone else not far behind me. T'Challa surpassed me, leading me to the room where they were. When I entered, I could hardly hear him, but I saw the look as he told her: "I love you, (Y/n). Do it. Kill me. I won't fight you."

I knew he meant it and I also could tell he was close to leaving us. I sprang into action, yelling to Steve, or anyone who was around that could help.

"We have to get her unconscious. He's not going to make it if we don't." 

I ran, Steve on one side, T'Challa on the other, and Okoye on my heels. The four of us began to grapple with her until we could get her off of Barnes...but just barely. I heard Wanda just over the chaos.

"Natasha, tend to Barnes. I've got her."

I took her word for it. Between her strength along with the other three, they would have her pinned back down soon enough. I headed for him. I kneeled down, sliding my hand and arm under his neck and head and pulled him slightly into my lap.

"Come on, Jam-" I paused momentarily, forcing myself to stop calling him James was going to be difficult. That had been what I had called him then, though. It was a name reserved only for my use. I swallowed hard as my eyes filled with tears and tried again.

"Come on, Barnes. Stay with us. We need you. (Y/n) needs you. She needs you now more than ever." I heard her growl deafeningly in response...despite that I knew she was still trying to bring his death about and was being held against her will. There was no response from Barnes. He was fading fast and I could feel my own will to live not far behind.

READER POV

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They were all against me now, but I had a mission and I couldn't let them stop me. I hit, kicked, punched, jumped, everything I could do against them to get to him...the traitor. The redhead left, headed toward him, MY mission, and I sensed I had a chance. Before I could kick my fighting up a notch, my body fell limp, yet remained tight. I was being moved through the air with what seemed like minimal effort. My eyes zeroed in on the next target after I finished off my mission. The face seemed to be one I recognized but one I may have known in a different life. Now, however, she was on my list. She would pay for being an obstacle. She told her colleagues to get ready because she was about to put me down. She had me situated over the table. I could feel my body straighten out into a lying position. I began to drift towards the table and they all grabbed a limb to help her hold me down. I was slowly making headway to be released from her grip. The ones surrounding me were having to use their entire body weight to keep me down.

"Hold her down. I've got to get the syringe in the other arm, where the previous wound is not," a girl in a doctor's coat that I didn't recognize said to them.

"I'll be back, and he will die," I hissed as I felt the needle slide into my arm and the sedative began making its way through my veins.

STEVE POV

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Once she was out, we all took a breath, then I remembered Buck and Nat. I ran over to them. Nat had fresh tears flowing down her face, wetting Buck's shirt and her own.

"He's not responding," she half yelled, half sobbed. 

"Excuse me," Shuri pushed through. She scanned his body with her bracelet. What kind of place is this, I thought, just barely stopping myself from questioning aloud. She beckoned her team and they made some sort of gurney out of thin air and it was slid under his body carefully. 

"Take him to the Ukusa room. Ngokukhawuleza." 

I may not have known what she was saying, but I could infer from her tone that it was bad. It was worse than I was even previously thinking. Oh God, I couldn't take losing Buck too, not after just having him back for such a short time. Nat and I followed behind Shuri and her team. She turned and halted us when we got to the room. 

"I know he means a lot to each of you, but for now I need you to remain outside of the room. You may watch from behind the glass, but you cannot enter, no matter what happens. Do you understand? We will do all that we can, but you must remain here no matter what." We both nodded in response. She entered the room, doors sliding shut behind her and there we were, frozen in time, watching them work relentlessly on the one person who meant the most to us at one time or another.

READER POV

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The darkness sunk back over my viewpoint and I knew I had been put under yet again. I didn't know how or why I was continually being sedated and awoken but with each time, my memory of being awake disappeared. I could feel my blood pulsing through my veins, but it was almost ice-cold. I wasn't sure why or what it meant, but I would have to deal with it regardless. I sensed the air around my body changing. It was less tense and it seemed I was alone again with my mind. I couldn't sense any other human presence with me. I was alone only for a moment when the memories I had previously witnessed seared my heart and mind as I recalled them. I recalled the anguish I had felt, that Bucky felt, when he relived those memories in his mind. 

It should come as no shock to me now why he tried to remain distant. If these were the things and the guilt that he lived with and re-lived, on a consistent basis, it completely madkes sense why he keeps anyone he cares about at a distance. He can't forgive himself for past, present, and even prospective future events that he feels responsible for. My heart ached even more as this realization settled in like I was a comfy rocking chair. I wanted to reject it, but for both Bucky and my sake, I knew it had to settle. If I were to have just one shred of any type of relationship with him, even if that were just to be distant friends, I knew I needed to sit with these memories and really just hold onto them to not only sympathize but also empathize with him whenever we see each other again.

Before I could sit in them too long, however, a startling notion plowed across my already well-tilled mind: What if I never see him again and HYDRA kills me before I get the chance to tell him I finally understand or that... that...I love him...more than I ever thought I could love anything or anyone? 

Immediately, I could feel myself willing the fog to clear. I could feel myself coming up for air and I didn't care who I had to fight or even kill to get out of here and back to him. If I had to drag my limp and broken body to him, I didn't care. I had to find my way back to him and it didn't matter anymore who stood in my way, friend or foe, I would see him again.

My eyelids fluttered open heavily, but they were at least open. I tried not to move anything but my eyes, not to alert anyone. As I skimmed the room to the best of my ability, I lifted myself at a staggeringly sluggish pace. I didn't see anyone in the room but considering the majority of the walls were glass, someone could come by at any moment. I sat motionless for a moment, listening in attempts to decide if I could venture a getaway. I didn't hear anything so I began to remove iv's and other miscellaneous medical equipment that was hooked up to me. 

Just as I was about to disconnect the last two, I heard a woman's voice. I returned to my previous position as quickly as possible and pretended to still be under, hoping she would pass by the room without entering. I heard the shifting of what must have been a glass wall or door. 

"Shit," I muttered within my mind, trying to think about what my next move could be. 

I could continue my charade of being under and maybe they would think the attachments came loose on their own. Maybe they would just walk in and not notice anything...because that's totally how my luck tends to go, then I could have kicked myself for even thinking that would be a possibility. Instead, I heard her approach. I heard another set of footsteps with her but they must have only been listening as she spoke in a language I didn't know.

"Wait," I heard her say. "What is this?" The other voice spoke, but it was a male voice and once again in that language that I didn't know. She had what seemed to be an African accent, though, when she spoke English so I remained still, curious as to what they'd do, measuring my options. I could sense the tension in the room growing.

"Ms. (y/l/n), can you hear me?" the male voice questioned. "Just in case you can and are afraid to answer. You are no longer in danger. Those people before that had you. They poisoned you to turn you into someone you're not."

"We don't want to say their name because we think it is a trigger word for you. They are responsible for many actions over the last 70 plus years that we do not agree with," the female voice continued. 

I hesitated. It could be a trick. It could easily be Hydra toying with me, but something within me felt safe enough to take a peek before opening my eyes and acknowledging their presence. I caught eyes with the young woman first. She smiled at me cautiously, waiting to see what I'd do, but I could see the needle in her hand, ready to inject.

"If you're not a danger to me, drop the needle."

"For your safety and our own, we'd prefer not to do that," the male answered for her. "My name is T'Challa, King of Wakanda. This is my sister, Shuri. We want to try and reverse what H- they did to you while they held you captive. We are wanting to do the same for Mr. B- the man you used to know well until you went your separate ways."

I stared at them incredulously. Even with all the secrecy, I understood what they were saying, most of it anyhow.

"So, wait. You're telling me that... wait, what do you mean reverse what they did? What did they do?'

"We are still running tests, but it seems they injected you with the same serum that they injected your friend with many years ago, but we believe they've updated the serum, meaning we have more tests to run before we can attempt to reverse it."

I had to try and shake my head as if that would help me process things quicker instead of simply shaking everything back up and mixing it together. 

"Wait, do you mean that-"

The sliding door jetted open and I quickly looked in that direction, fear overcoming me, thinking it was all just a hoax. Yet, all fear left my body and was immediately replaced with relief and happiness when I recognized the face before me.