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thebibliomancer · 4 years ago

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Essential Avengers: King-Size Annual Avengers #11: In Honor’s Name!

August, 1982

“Why do the AVENGERS battle the Defenders?”

I dunno, man. Is it Tuesday again?

“And who is the mystery woman Nebulon has fallen for?”

Nebulona? She’s clearly just him but a woman.

Oh, hey Beast. So this is where you got to after quitting the Avengers.

Soooo.... Annuals, amirite? Pain in my butt. I actually forgot to cover this one and #12 is going to be somewhat plot relevant soon so I’ll shove this in wherever.

Its a blast from the past of the previous year. Back when the Avengers were fantastic but only numbered four: Captain America, Iron Man, Thor, and Wasp.

And the Defenders seem to number many so this isn’t a very fair fight at all.

This issue starts with a PRELUDE

(J. M. DeMatteis again? Is this going to be weird?)

Nebulon the Celestial Man and damn fine dresser fades onto a hilltop shaking his fist and yelling that someone can’t do something to him.

Nebulon is mostly a Defenders villain and the major thing I know about him is that he’s supposedly exceptionally handsome but the handsomeness is a ruse and that the Squadron Sinister stopped helping him destroy the world once because they discovered he wasn’t as handsome as he was letting on.

Goes to show where their priorities lie. Also, the experience was so jarring that the evil Nighthawk decided to join the Defenders much to their chagrin.

So basically I know nothing about Nebulon. Hi, Nebulon.

An angry yelly fish head with the Rocky Horror Picture Show lips inside its fish lips shows up (I think this is what Nebulon realy looks like) and tells Nebulon that his punishment for constantly dicking with Earth is to be stranded on Earth with his powers reduced to half and stuck in his handsome-to-some-but-grotesque-to-fish body.

Okay. That clears things up.

Although I wish all of space would stop using Earth as their place to dump stuff or exile people. Its bad enough when Asgard does it. Its worse enough when there’s a whole crossover about all of space deciding to make Earth its supermax jail. And its a medium amount enough here.

But apparently the shouty fish people have a Prime Directive and Nebulon keeps breaking it, specifically on Earth. But a Prime Directive that also lets them dump troublemakers on planets where they’ve been troublemaking.

Nebulon tries to defend himself that, hey, Earth makes you do crazy stuff. But the yell fish is hearing nothing of it and just tells Nebulon to kill himself if he doesn’t want to be on Earth so bad.

... Eesh.

In his rage at being stranded on Earth, Nebulon teleports inside the Sanctum Sanctorum and starts yelling at Wong.

Wong tells him, dude, Dr Strange isn’t even here. So Nebulon starts beating up Wong.

How dare you, sir. Wong is a great guy!

Nebulon: “Then Wong shall die -- just as your master shall soon die -- and his accursed Defenders with him! They shall all pay for bringing this tragedy down on my head! For, if they had not risen up to thwart me. If they -- if they... Listen to me. Listen to the words of -- a fool! Forgive me, Wong! Neither you, Strange, nor the Defenders are responsible! The blame belongs solely to -- NEBULON!”

And then he teleports away, no doubt leaving Wong very confused.

CHAPTER 1: IN HONOR’S NAME!

Later, Thor flies over the Himalaya mountains and over the chapter title.

He has come for some peace and quiet sitting on a mountain away from the bustle of mortals but what does he find but someone already in his thinking spot!

Thor lands to see who would be sitting on a mountain with no pants on and its Nebulon, of course.

But I have to say. He’s sitting and hugging his knees. That’s advanced brood. That’s, in fact, verging on pout.

Although lets not let the fact that Thor flies out to the Himalayas to be alone sometimes slip on by uncommented.

Thor asks what brings the guy out here and Nebulon has a dramatic exile speech ready to go.

Nebulon: “For hours now I have sat, lost in thought, pondering that very question! What is it that brings any creature to the depths of despair, the edge of doom, but... himself?”

And since he senses a kindred spirit in Thor, one who is as different from the Earthly masses as Nebulon is, he unloads his full story onto Thor’s ears.

Upon hearing all about this dude who tried to take over or sell the world multiple times, Thor is like ‘this guy has got to meet the Avengers!’

Nebulon thinks Avengers sounds like Defenders and he’s not into that but Thor says that the Avengers are way cooler than the Defenders.

(Ooooh, shots fired, Thor)

Thor: “No, my friend -- there are none in all creation to compare with the Avengers! A hardier band of warriors hath ne’er been assembled! Where else could a god walk among mortals and find -- his equals?”

If Nebulon has truly repented of his past deeds, the Avengers will help him make a home on Earth.

And with a manly armclasp, like the one from Predator, Nebulon accepts and Thor takes him AWAY!

While the person who looks like Nebulon but a woman and with better boots watches them go and disappears in a bright flash of light.

CHAPTER 2

Yes, already.

“Avengers Mansion... Over the years, many fantastic beings have walked through the doors of this august Manhattan townhouse: Gods, mutants, androids... even a were-woman. But, of all these unique individuals, few -- if any -- have been more honored, more respected... More willing to serve the cause of freedom, wherever the place, whenever the time.. than the living legend whose only powers are his wits, his daring, and his years of hard-won skill... Captain America!”

And we see Cap leaping and gamboling about the exercise room, exercising.

Cap: “Ah -- there’s nothing like a good workout to make a man feel truly alive! It might pay to run through it once more, though --- my timing was a hair off on the parallel bars!”

Wasp comes in to... well, its Wasp. She comes to eye the eye candy and flirt a little, in a friendly fashion.

Wasp: “I see you’re here early for our meeting -- as usual! Don’t you ever slow down?”

Cap: “I seem to remember catching a few winks back in 1942 or so!”

Wasp: “Why, Cap -- that was two jokes in a row! I didn’t think you had it in you!”

Cap: “Oh, come on, Jan -- I’m not really that serious a guy, am I?”

Wasp: “I was just kidding, handsome.”

Cap: “Oh.”

Heh.

So, Thor called a super special emergency meeting of the Avengers to introduce his cool new friend.

Iron Man (secretly Tony Stark, true believers) is a little tense about the meeting because he had to cancel three business conferences, an address to foreign stockholders, and two dates.

Geez, for one meeting? You ever consider your calendar is way too packed, Tony?

Thor arrives with his cool, new pal and introduces the Avengers to NEBULON -- THE CELESTIAL MAN!

And Iron Man lunges out of his chair to get into better pointing distance.

Thor: “What irks thee, comrade? Why art thou so angered?”

Iron Man: “What irks me, Thor? He does! Haven’t you ever bothered to study our computer-file on alien threats? Your ‘newfound ally’ almost totalled the Earth -- several times!”

Nebulon: “Don’t you see, Thor? They react as I predicted they would!”

Also, geez. I know Tony is frustrated about all the schedule juggling he’s had to do but in this and the Black Knight two-parter he’s a lot ruder to Thor than you’d expect considering how close they are.

Some writers just don’t get the Avengers, I guess.

Cap and Wasp try to get Iron Man to calm down.

Wasp: “I’m sure there’s a darn good reason why Thor brought Nebulon here -- isn’t there?”

She’s downright staring daggers at him when she asks that.

We’ve jumped back in time a little from where I was covering but Jan is still the chairperson of the Avengers. It happened right when she returned from her divorce related hiatus and this four person group has to take place post-Tigra leaving and pre-membership drive.

So, she’s the boss and she just gave angry boss eyes at Thor. And Thor did his default squinting always-looks-pissed look back at her.

Thor tells Nebulon’s whole sad story off-panel.

And damn if it doesn’t hit the Avengers right where they live.

Wasp tells him that they all know what it means to lose something precious “whether it’s an entire world... or the love of one person -- it makes no difference! It hurts to suddenly find yourself -- alone!”

And Captain America sympathizes because when he was defrosted after twenty years, it was like a strange new world!

They’re both on team ‘give Nebulon a chance!’

Iron Man is more reluctant but decides to give Nebulon one chance.

Then the Defenders bust in.

Beast, Valkyrie, Silver Surfer, and Gargoyle who is not Etrigan at all.

And they’re here to kick Nebulon’s ass. Which is entirely fair considering that they’ve been the ones who keep having to stop Nebulon’s planschemes.

Since the Avengers seem to not be beating up Nebulon, obviously they’ve all been mind controlled. Nebulon is clearly planning to blow up half the Earth and use the Avengers to control the rest.

Cap: ‘what’

Silver Surfer: ‘HE’S MAKING A HOSTILE MOVE!’

And then Silver Surfer blasts the floor, sending all of the Avengers sprawling every which way.

MEANWHILE, IN SPACE

There’s a huge spaceship, in space. And within the huge spaceship in space, the lady who looks like a lady Nebulon watches the fight on a screen and cries.

Hey, I get it. Doing the Avengers vs Defenders Again But Worse makes me sad too.

CHAPTER 3

See, that’s more of the length for a chapter. You could learn something from chapter 2, chapter 1.

Anyway, the clock winds back a little for the Defender’s side of the story.

Valkyrie returns to the Sanctum Sanctorum in a good mood and also on a flying horse.

For a long while, Valkyrie’s status quo is that she was inhabiting the body of Barbara Norris, a woman that Dr Strange accidentally drove insane. But she’s gotten her original Asgardian body back so she’s stronger than ever and also not bodyjacking someone else.

She flies into the window, alarming Gargoyle, Beast, and Wong.

Gargoyle tearfully flies up and hugs Valkyrie saying that he thought she was leaving for Asgard forever.

Hey, um, who dis?

-wiki- Ok so he’s an elderly man who was trapped in a gargoyle body by some demons who he broke an agreement with. Cool, cool, cool. I would have guessed much younger based on how he acts here.

Valkyrie also smooshes Beast’s hand when he gives her a handshake hello, because she’s much buffer than she was when she left. Also, she talks more like Thor.

Valkyrie: “I am, at long last, the true Valkyrie! What more need be said?”

Then the Lady Nebulon teleports in and introduces herself as Supernalia. She tells the Defenders that she’s here to save the world from the evil of NEBULON!

Beast doesn’t recognize the name but Valkyrie definitely does. What with all the existing history that I keep alluding to.

Supernalia: “Indeed! I am a bounty hunter from Nebulon’s homeworld come to bring him to justice! He has fled to your Earth, taking sanctuary among the so-called Avengers! Using celestial mind control, he has usurped their will, and -- after decimating part of your world with four pre-set anti-matter bombs -- he plans to use the Avengers to take control of the surviving population!”

Beast goes ‘uh cool story but i’mma verify this real quick by ringing them up’

But then he remembers he already did do that and they were very rude to him!

He remembers this interaction very clearly even though it didn’t happen at all.

Ironically, the Defenders are the ones who are being mind-controlled into accusing other people of being mind-controlled. Yes, I’m pretty sure that’s irony.

Wong suddenly remembers that Nebulon rushed in the previous night but he can’t remember how that interaction actually went.

AH HAH, decides Beast. Clearly proof that Nebulon mind-controlled Wong. Lets go half-cocked everyone.

No, no. Beast decides they’ll need more than just the three of them and wonders who they should call to bolster their numbers to a whole four Defenders. Dr Strange is busy chasing Daimon Hellstrom and Namor soooo...

Valkyrie suggests Silver Surfer because he kicks ass but they have no way to get in contact with him.

Supernalia goes hey allow me.

Supernalia: “Although my planet’s laws forbid direct involvement with alien cultures -- and thus my need of you Defenders -- I can help!”

And she baps Valkyrie in the forehead and instantly transmissions Silver Surfer right to the Sanctum to his existential annoyance.

Silver Surfer: What force has swept me halfway ‘round the world? Who toys with -- the Silver Surfer?”

Valkyrie explains off-panel because this is very much “let me explain! No, there is too much. Let me sum up” kind of day.

CHAPTER 4

We cut back to right after the Silver Surfer knocked everyone on their ass with a warning shot.

Thor: “Surfer -- art thou mad?! Thy ‘warning’ came close to slaying us all!”

Thor gets up to kick Norrin’s rad ass but Valkyrie grabs his arm. She tries to convince him to trust her that Nebulon is controlling the Avengers. She appeals to their shared history, their shared love.

Thor: “Brunnhilde -- thou art truly the one blinded... by thine own prejudice! Because, once, Nebulon stood as thine enemy -- thou takest him for that again!”

Valkyrie: “Thunderer -- once I loved thee -- but now I see -- that thou art -- A FOOL!”

Then she just up and tosses him.

It’s pretty great.

Thor just rights himself midtoss by helicoptering his hammer and tells Valkyrie that she’s the fool. And also that because she fucking threw him, now he knows that its her group that are under some kind of control.

Nebulon starts yelling too because he’s not going to sit by while other people fight his battle so he’s like ‘come on if you’re hard enough, dickfenders’ and Beast is like ‘ok.’

Wasp, team leader, thinks Thor is onto something re: the Defenders being against some kind of influence and asks Iron Man to create a distraction so the Avengers can skedaddle.

Iron Man has the perfect distraction and fires the UNIBEEEEAM. At his own roof, collapsing it on the Defenders.

Iron Man: “Wait till Tony gets the bill for this!”

... so depending on the time frame, either only Nebulon or both him and Wasp are the only ones who don’t know Iron Man is Tony so who are you putting on a show for, Tony?

Or maybe you’re just so used to grousing about the Avengers breaking your shit that you do it even when you do it.

Anyway, since Thor has a hunch that the Defenders are being controlled, he decides that the best thing is to teleport somewhere safe and make a plan.

So Nebulon teleports himself and the Avengers to the Himalayas where he and Thor first met.

The effort nearly kills Nebulon, since his powers have been curtailed by the yell fish. But now they have some space.

Wasp: “And don’t think we don’t appreciate it, Nebulon! But couldn’t you have zapped us to a more temperate climate -- like the Bahamas... or the French Riviera? It mean, it’s COLD here!”

Cap hopes that the Defenders won’t find them somewhere so remote and isolated but Thor, whose idea this was by the by, isn’t so sure because they don’t know who is pulling the strings.

Iron Man: “Good point! Are we dealing with one of our old foes -- one of the Defenders’ -- or perhaps someone out for Nebulon’s head! Let’s face it: we’ve got a wide field to choose from!”

Annnnnnd thennnnn, the Defenders just show up anyway so trying to get some breathing room was a waste of Nebulon’s efforts.

Beast: “Cap, Thor, Iron Man, Jan! You’re all my friends... more than that -- you’re family! So why won’t you believe me when I tell you that this nut’s gonna wipe the whole planet out in a matter of hours! Please -- hand him over or --.”

Nebulon: “Or... NOTHING!”

Then he shoots an energy blast at the Defenders.

Which sadly arcs to the ground with a SHOOOM! and does little more than splash some snow on the Defenders.

But awwww, Beast considers the Avengers family! Shame that once the X-Men pull him back into their orbit, he only hangs out with them and decides never to ask the Avengers for help, either when Professor X gets shot by Stryfe or when trying to solve the Legacy Virus.

I think that social group is a bad influence on Beast. He never broke time or pretended to be gay to dunk on his ex when he was an Avenger. He just got high, practiced polyamory, and yukked it up with his bffsie Wonder Man.

Anyway, Silver Surfer gets up and disses Nebulon for his sad laser blast.

Silver Surfer: “Like all who seek conquest, Nebulon -- you refuse to recognize truth! You alter reality to serve your own malefic ends! But the power you no wield, tyrant, is as nothing compared to that which you once had! You are weak -- as Supernalia said you would be!”

Nebulon is aghast to hear that Supernalia is the one behind all of this. And also aghast when Gargoyle shoots a bio-mystic bolt at him.

Apparently, Gargoyle can shoot bio-mystic bolts. Are there mystic bolts that are not bio? Shrug.

CHAPTER 5

Hey, some of these chapter divisions feel arbitrary. We go from the fight to the fight. At least some other chapter divisions had scene or temporal shifts.

Cap begs the Defenders to fight off Supernalia’s influence. Or the Avengers will fight off Supernalia’s influence for them. Probably via punches.

For whatever reason, this makes Valkyrie go stickycaps.

Valkyrie: “The hour of Earth’s doom draws ever closer -- and, to prevent that doom, we will do whate’er we must! wHaTeVeR wE mUsT!”

Mystifying.

Anyway, with both sides thinking the other side are dumb easily mind-controlled doodoo heads, they both get to the slugfest that neither side wants but thinks there’s no other way to reach the other side but by punching some sense into them.

This panel feels like a microcosm of a lot of Marvel events.

And as this goes on Nebulon just watches the fight with calculating eyes.

I’m sure that’s fine.

Thor and Valkyrie continue sparring verbally, as well as with punches. Valkyrie asks how Thor can let Midgard be destroyed when they both love it so much. And Thor is like ‘for the last time, there’s no danger except from your mysterious new golden pal’

Meanwhile, the Defender’s mysterious new golden pal Supernalia is monitoring the fight from her spaceship. And monitoring the Defenders’ brainwaves.

Thor is actually making Valkyrie doubt. And Supernalia can’t have that.

Supernalia: “I cannot afford to lose control of the Defenders now! For honor’s sake, their rage must grow! And more -- they must retain a psychological surety that cannot be breached! In Valkyrie’s case, the introduction of something... familiar -- something to increase her confidence -- would seem appropriate!”

So Supernalia teleports Valkyrie’s sweet flying horse Aragorn to just. Appear on the Himalayas. Between Valkyrie and Thor.

Valkyrie doesn’t know how her horse suddenly appeared but she’s not going to look a gift teleporting winged horse in the mouth. She jumps on his back and takes to the air.

Thor gets pissed and hammerflings himself after her.

While Thor is chasing Valkyrie around the sky, Iron Man squares up with Silver Surfer.

Silver Surfer tells Iron Man that “you see to halt one who has outraced comets! Soared faster than light itself!” and basically that he rules, Iron Man sucks. And then to prove it, he blasts Iron Man with the power cosmic.

Just that one attack nearly tore Iron Man apart and he’s pretty sure that Silver Surfer was holding back. Oof, that’s some power gap.

BUT MAYBE just maybe if Iron Man puts all of his might into one staggering punch...

It’ll do jack shit to the Surfer.

Well, damn.

Gargoyle fights Wasp but says its not proper for a man to fight a lady. Wasp points out ‘hey you’re fighting me anyway so maybe someone is making you do it.’

Gargoyle: ‘.... NUH UH’

Cool. Good talk.

Supernalia: “This Gargoyle is too... soft! His mind accepts -- but his heart rebels! These beings are not like us! Their minds are filled with too many questions! Their souls overflow with conflicting emotions!”

I can’t believe humans (and Asgardians) have too many feelings and emotions to be easily controlled.

Well, I can believe. It really checks out.

So Supernalia increases the celestial mindwaves to shore up her control, even if it means burning out the Defenders.

Rude.

Thor blasts Valkyrie off of Aragorn with lightning and then catches her, saying he won’t let her fall. So, reasonably enough, Valkyrie elbows him in the face for treating her like a damsel.

They both fall toward the ground. Aragorn catches Valkyrie and Thor catches... a cosmic bolt from Silver Surfer.

You had one job, Iron Man.

And that job was to sneak up on Silver Surfer while he’s self-flagellating for doing a shameful opportunistic attack on Thor.

Iron Man uses those... hip... power pod... things. To zap Silver Surfer’s temples and siphon off some of his power.

And with that power, Iron Man tips a chunk of the mountain on top of Silver Surfer.

This doesn’t keep the Surfer down for long. Despite the fact that trying to contain the incredible surfing energies he absorbed threatens to damage his armor, Iron Man absorbs more when Silver Surfer blasts him, to try to turn the energy back at the Surfer.

Instead, they both explode.

Double KO.

Elsewhere in the fight, Gargoyle blasts Wasp with his bio-mystic bolts, knocking her into the snow.

Gargoyle panics because his bio-mystic bolts are supposed to drain off a fraction of a person’s life-force, not up and kill them.

So Gargoyle shouldn’t have been surprised when Wasp pops back up and zaps him in the chin. And Wasp shouldn’t have been surprised when Gargoyle zaps her back.

She passes out. But so does Gargoyle, to his confusion. His hide should be tough enough to take a truckload of punishment, yet he suddenly feels so weak.

I mean. Wasp is strong enough to blow up a house with her own zaps. But this is probably intended to be Supernalia’s mind control burning him out.

I choose to believe that its Wasp’s cool house-blowing-up might. She’s kicked bigger ass than Gargoyle.

Wasp’s defeat scream momentarily distracts Cap from where he’s fisticuffsing with Beast.

Beast: “Holy cow! I hope she’s not badly hurt!”

Cap: “You hope she’s not -- ?! You can still say that after all you’ve done today? After all the pain this Supernalia has driven the Defenders to cause?”

Beast: “We’ve caused? You’re the ones harboring the lunatic with the anti-matter bombs --.”

There’s no guilt-tripping some people.

Cap throws his mighty shield but Beast must not have heard the song because he not only doesn’t yield, he also catches the shield with his feets.

Then he sleds on it down a snowy incline and tackles Cap.

Beast: “It’s time we quit all this clowning around!”

Cap: “That’s right, Hank! This is serious business -- so hit me! Hit me, blast you! HIT ME!”

Beast: “Hey! wHaT tHe HeCk Am I dOiNg?”

Cap: “Coming to your senses, I hope!”

Beast realizes that Cap dropped his guard and let Beast beat the shit out of him on purpose, let Beast almost kill him.

Cap: “You’re no killer, Hank! And no force, however great, could make you kill! I counted on that fact to snap you out of it!”

Wow, good going, Cap!

Out of everyone here, you’re the only one who successfully snapped anyone out of anything. Although I think Wasp coulda if she had played possum and let Gargoyle think he killed her instead of popping up to zap him.

But Cap has insight into Hank. That probably helped.

Me and Jan know jack about Gargolye.

CHAPTER 6

With exactly two people conscious but not fighting anymore, Nebulon is like ‘hah eat shit Supernalia’

So Supernalia appears.

Beast feels like he’s about to keel over even though he beat the shit out of Cap and Cap feels weaker too. They blame Supernalia because its very easy to blame someone whose fault everything is.

But Supernalia blames Nebulon.

Nebulon slams a drama bomb in response.

Nebulon: “Do not seek to reclaim the upper hand with more lies, Supernalia! Such sophistry is unbecoming in... my wife!”

I heard that in Borat voice and I hate myself a little.

But now that Supernalia’s relation to Nebulon has been established, Nebulon is like ‘but why are you trying to ruin my exile?’

Supernalia: “You were convicted of high crimes, my husband -- and the sentence was a choice of honorable death by your own hand... or ignominious exile! In 500 generations, none of our people have ever chosen exile! All have proudly faced extinction! But you, lacking courage, brought shame upon your wife and children!”

HE HAS KIDS??

Anyway, she came to Earth to just. Kinda. Kill him. To restore honor to their family.

But when she got there, she found that he had already made friends and decided well I need some pawns of my own. So I can kill him.

Nebulon isn’t really impressed because in his one day as an exile, he’s had some epiphanies.

Nebulon: “Unlike you, I have traveled far across this universe! I have learned to see in new ways! Our concepts of honor are archaic! Our laws are cruel! I now dare to dream higher dreams, for I have learned what it means to have -- friends!”

Supernalia: “I have been your friend... and much more! Since our childhood betrothal have I stood by you -- despite your constant avoidance of responsibilities! Despite your failure to achieve glory or rank!”

Oof, imagine if your childhood friend and spouse told you that being exiled on Earth taught him what friendship really means.

I have to imagine that Cap and Beast are just listening to this like ‘god why do cosmic people always have to dump their relationship baggage on Earth?’

Supernalia then tries to tell Beast and Cap that Actually Nebulon is up to no good.

Beast is like yeah nice try.

But this time Supernalia has actual proof evidence.

She dispels the invisibility cloak hiding the Ennui Device that Nebulon left on a prior trip to Earth and is now using to drain energy from the Avengers and Defenders to beef himself up.

Now, Cap and Beast turn to Nebulon like ‘but buddy, why?’ and also to punch him a little bit, in a friendly manner.

Nebulon: “I did what I had to -- to survive! Believe me -- I truly wanted the friendship you offered -- but observing the unfolding battle, I realized I could never find peace on this or any world -- without the POWER!”

And this rude boy who doesn’t understand what friendship means punches both Cap and Beast.

Beast sprawls right at Supernalia’s feet completely burned out and goes hey feel like stepping in??

Supernalia: “I can do nothing directly, Beast. I am not permitted to interfere!”

Beast: “You... stupid... self-deluding... idiots! Don’t you understand that all this has happened... because you already have... interfered?!?!”

Supernalia: “So I have!”

And since now she’s done the big bad transgress of the Prime Directive, she decides that unlike her shitbird husband, she’s going to do the honorable thing and kill herself.

I. Have no words. At this entire exchange.

Its too much.

Nebulon is distraught so slaps the gun out of her hand and begs her to instead of killing herself, not do that. She could stay on Earth and rule at his side!

This latest bout of cosmic interpersonal drama gives Cap the opportunity to muster his strength and throw his mighty shield.

It deflects the ray emitter of the Ennui Device so it hits Nebulon instead of the Avengerdefenders.

Except, oops, the Ennui Beam was calibrated for “humanoid physio-psycho energies” so instead of draining his energy, the Ennui Beam just straight up starts killing Nebulon.

Amazing how you can stretch vocabulary to encompass humans, Asgardians, mutants, power cosmic imbued Zenn-Lavians, and whatever demonic biz is going on with the Gargoyle.

It sure is amazing how it affects all these different things as intended but its accidentally fatal in a way that will help wrap up the story.

Beast wet noodle jumps to try to redirect the beam and save Nebulon but Supernalia shoves him out of the way and then jumps into the beam herself.

Supernalia: “Thus, I join my husband -- in oblivion!”

Geez, when she sets her mind to killing herself, she sticks with it

.__.

Nebulon agrees that Actually This is the Right and Correct Course for them, I guess because couple counseling is a hassle.

Then the Ennui Device overloads and explodes and Nebulon and Supernalia turn to their true forms of giant weird fish people with Rocky Horror Picture Show lips inside fish lips.

Beast laments that Supernalia didn’t just let him save both of them but she’s like ‘HONORRR’ and then dies.

Thor: “I called Nebulon friend and he decieved me! Yet now -- Thor mourns his passing!”

Silver Surfer: “What manner of beings were they, to cherish honor so much... and value life so little?”

Cap: “Perhaps, Surfer -- not so different from us. Not so different -- at all!”

Okay, shut up your face, Cap.

First off, I don’t think much of an honor code that says its okay to mind control and lie to people and use them as pawns in a way that could kill them but then also goes ‘this is an honorable death’ when you stupid yourself to death.

And neither should you! Don’t put a poetic, poignant spin on things! This whole affair was a weird couples spat that two space weirdos forced you to participate in!

Follow @essential-avengers because I went back and covered an inconsequential annual and now I can’t go back and not do that. I wasted my time for you. Also, like and reblog. I need positive reinforcement. It makes me happy.

#Avengers #Defenders #Nebulon #Supernalia #Thor #Iron Man #Captain America #the Wasp #Beast #Valkyrie #Silver Surfer #Gargoyle #whoever that is #essential marvel liveblogging #essential avengers #this is like when a couple tries to get you to choose sides in a very public fight they're having #its unnecessary and uncomfortable and awkward for everyone

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tozierpunks · 6 years ago

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“I love you both, so much.”

A commission for my buddy, my pal @whatidoisxsecret. Something I call lemon fluff, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do! Featuring: Bill x Mike x Richie. Hanzier/Hanbrough/Bichie. Whatever we wanna call that. lol And a warning: it’s finna get mildly nsfw.

One of Richie’s records played quietly in the background. A total of two candles were lit, accompanied by some incense. For Mike, Bill, and Richie, this was what they could afford on their budget. The trio crammed themselves into a one bedroom apartment, decorated with second-hand furniture they found on street curbs or just far enough from the dumpster to deem safe. Their mattress, mostly flattened due to years of use, was picked up from a neighbor - thanks to a Craigslist ad.

Below their apartment, they could hear the cars and music from nearby nightclubs. New York was their dream city growing up, and they finally made it. None of them cared how much (or how little) they had.

Tonight they christened in their new bed, eager to retire their old sleeping bags.

Bill sat between Mike’s legs, Mike’s cock buried deep inside him. One hand held Bill’s throat, the other rested firmly on his flat belly. He moved it only to brush his fingers through Richie’s wild mane of hair. As Mike kissed Bill, Richie busied himself by sucking his cock. It didn’t take long at all for Bill to cum, having the most attention.

“A top, a bottom, and a verse walk into a bar.” Richie would sometimes joke.

Mike was the constant top, Bill was the faithful bottom, and Richie demanded a bit of both.

The first time they had a threesome, he jokingly said the words “fuck train,” and understandably, Bill and Mike were no longer in the mood.

If he was the worst with words, then Bill was the best, gifted with the ability to sweet talk (and dirty talk) either boy into a weak puddle. Meanwhile Mike, who also had a way with words, showed more through his actions. He was the one who remembered allergies and preferences, and who thought to order Chinese when Bill insisted he would cook, knowing damn well he wouldn’t. This wasn’t to say Richie brought little to the table; Mike saw his worth when no one else did. Richie made them happy, and yes, they all made each other happy, but Richie didn’t even have to try. He could smile and make the whole room feel better. He was magic.

Slipping two fingers into Bill’s mouth, letting him suck on them, Mike thrusted his hips a few more times before his cock throbbed and he came inside Bill. Richie’s head bobbed as he sucked Bill off, his own cock soft by now. He usually came first, sandwiched between Mike and Bill when they had sex. This usually worked for Bill and Mike, seeing as Richie would preoccupy himself with going down on one of them. Although they would never admit it, Richie gave the best blowjobs.

There was a time he made Mike cum so hard, a shot of it landed on their bedside lamp, frying on the piping hot bulb. Richie laughed until he couldn’t breathe, and he never failed to mention the story at least once a month. Over dinner, no less.

Another time, he went down on Bill when they were alone on the subway. He bet Bill he could make him cum before they reached the next stop - winner buys sandwiches from the deli. Mike looked up when they returned home, seeing Richie waltz in with an armful of subs and a cheesy grin stretching from ear to ear.

“Fuh-fuck!” Bill stammered, cumming down Richie’s throat. Circling his thumb and forefinger around his balls, Richie didn’t stop sucking until Bill bucked his hips and pushed him off. “I’m not Mike, babe.” He was breathless, a small smile on his face. Richie learned exactly what his boys liked from their blowjobs; Bill was painfully sensitive after an orgasm, while Mike liked being sucked off until he was soft again.

“My bad, Billy,” Richie said, crawling over to Mike. Taking Mike’s cock in his mouth, he lowered his head slowly, licking off the cum. Bill didn’t hesitate to drape himself over Richie, kissing down his shoulders and back. His legs were tangled with Mike’s, who leaned his back against the wall.

The paint peeled around them, but they paid no mind. A lot of the little filthy details went unnoticed when they first examined the apartment. They were just too excited to care. An apartment in New York meant freedom. It meant being who they were as best friends and lovers for the first time in their entire lives. Growing up in Derry, sure they had their other friends, coming together as a band of losers against the world... but they all wanted more. Needed more.

During the summer gay marriage became legal, Mike suggested they move to New York. It wasn’t radically far from home, but it was far enough that they could find their place in the world.

Richie originally had his sights set on California, but he knew perfectly well how close Mike was with his parents. He didn’t want there to be any excuse for him to miss a Thanksgiving or Christmas, so he agreed on the big apple. New York’s comedy scene was better anyways.

Bill was willing to follow Richie anywhere. The two grew up together, knowing each other since diaper days. When they were kids, Bill would tell scary stories over a fire in his backyard, leaving Richie unable to sleep for the rest of the night. It didn’t help they usually spent it in Bill’s treehouse. It especially didn’t help when his kid brother, Georgie, would peek from his window and wave creepily at Richie.

Their first kiss was in that treehouse.

Before Bill’s dad tore it down, Richie and Bill climbed up for one last hurrah. The lied on the creaky planks, listening to an old Linkin Park CD from Bill’s emo phase (which Richie didn’t believe he fully grew out of). Bill asked if he could try something, and he kissed Richie. Neither of them said anything, but they didn’t need to. Richie grabbed a fistful of his hair and crushed his lips against Bill’s for a second kiss.

“Bill?” Mike tilted his head up, his eyes following Bill as the scrawnier boy stood up.

“I’m gonna get a towel,” he said, disappearing into the bathroom. Richie and Mike could hear the water running, and Bill returned moments later with a damp rag. Gingerly wiping the cum from Richie’s stomach, he left soft kisses along his pelvis. When he turned to clean off Mike, distracted by folding the rag, Mike grabbed him by the back of his neck and pulled him in for a deeper kiss. His tongue glossed over his bottom lip, flicking against the tip of Bill’s tongue.

Richie sat up, impatiently waiting for his turn.

There used to be a time when Bill was the impatient one. When Richie first introduced Mike to him, Bill couldn’t help but noticed the way their eyes lingered on each other. He wanted to step between them. Keep them apart. They talked about music Bill didn’t like; Mike introduced Richie to sounds and ideas he’d never had himself.

When he caught them kissing in Richie’s room, Bill thought he’d been punched in the gut. He couldn’t breathe as he ran down the stairs and escaped the house he’d spent so much of his childhood in. Richie followed after him, but he didn’t hear half of what his best friend said. They hadn’t mentioned their kiss since it happened, but Bill assumed Richie understood.

He loved him.

Surprisingly, it didn’t take much for Bill and Mike to get along. Mike sought him out at school, asking about the book he was reading. He explained how much he liked Richie, but he would back off if Bill was already starting something with him. Bill wanted to agree, but then Mike added an “or” to his statement. He teased the idea of a friendly competition, but didn’t mean it. Richie would love who he wanted to love.

“You can’t ask Richie Tozier to make a choice. He’ll end up choosing both on everything,” Bill said.

Mike contemplated that for a moment before going, “I wouldn’t mind.”

He winked at Bill and the rest was history. Bill had never been so charmed by a boy since knowing Richie, but somehow, Mike managed. Although it might’ve seemed silly to anyone else, the moment Bill fell for Mike, was when he rode Bill’s old bike. Good old Silver had seen better days, but Mike offered to repair the bike, and even grease up the poor thing’s joints to make it ride more smoothly. He mounted it when he was done, riding around his lawn and laughing. The clicks from the fresh spoke cards rang out loudly.

Bill couldn’t help but laugh too, a warm smile replacing his distrustful expression.

“Blow out that candle, would you, Rich?” Bill asked as he snuggled against Mike. Richie fanned out the tiny flame, crawling over to cuddle against Mike’s free side.

Lying between them, Mike pet their heads, savoring their warmth. Whenever the heater broke in the winter, he had his boys to keep him toasty. They had each other, as a matter of fact.

And when it was too hot outside, they could lounge around the apartment naked without a care.

When they got drunk at the bars below, singing at the top of their lungs as they stumbled across cobblestone streets, at least one of them (Bill) was smart enough to hydrate, and could take care of the others in the morning.

When Mike forgot something, Richie didn’t.

When Bill cried, Mike and Richie comforted him. No or. He needed both.

They completed each other in ways most couples didn’t think about.

Bill and Richie leaned over Mike’s chest, kissing each other before coming down to kiss Mike. He laughed as they pushed each other for access to his mouth, and when they returned to his sides, he squeezed them closer.

“I love you both, you know,” he whispered. “I love you both so much.”

#commission #hanzier #bichie #hanbrough

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recentnews18-blog · 6 years ago

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New Post has been published on https://shovelnews.com/alan-yang-is-keeping-it-weird-with-his-new-amazon-series-forever/

Alan Yang Is Keeping It Weird with His New Amazon Series Forever

Alan Yang on the set of Forever with Maya Rudolph and Fred Armisen.

By Colleen Hayes, courtesy Amazon Prime Video

If you were to picture a successful screenwriter and director’s house in the Hollywood Hills, you’d probably imagine something like Alan Yang’s place. Perched in a cul-de-sac at the top of a steep winding street, the mid-century modern home hovers above the city, a wall of windows framing a glimmering view. When I arrive to meet the co-creator of Master of None and the forthcoming Amazon series Forever on a warm July evening, a cluster of people dressed like gaudy refugees from a 1980s Sunset Strip hair-metal band stand outside a house a few doors down from his place, planning their party route for the night and living out their L.A. dream.

Yang’s own Hollywood fantasy seems to involve hard work, high-powered meetings, and flights between New York, Taiwan, and Los Angeles as he plots ever more ambitious idiosyncratic projects. Earlier that day, he’d met with executives to discuss Tigertail, the multi-generational Asian-American feature film starring John Cho, inspired by his own family saga, which he is writing and directing for Netflix. He is also in the early stages of producing Little America, an anthology series about immigrants for Apple, which will be written by Kumail Nanjiani and Emily V. Gordon.

Right now, though, there’s Forever, the uncanny dramedy Yang co-created with Matt Hubbard that drops on Amazon Prime on September 14. Starring Maya Rudolph and Fred Armisen, Forever takes the idea of marital commitment to wild, existential extremes.

Yang got his big TV break when Michael Schur and Greg Daniels hired him for the writing staff of Parks and Recreation. He had met Schur—virtually—through a baseball blog called Fire Joe Morgan that both men obsessively contributed to. (“It was legitimately crazy,” Yang said. “We would write 15,000-word screeds for no money!”)

After absorbing the show’s sweet vibe and character-based humor for six seasons, Yang and Parks and Rec pal Aziz Ansari decided to create their own series, Master of None, based on their friendship and “the fact that we like to eat food together”—which is, Yang hastens to add, “not the worst way to start a working relationship.” They wrote a pilot and sold it to Netflix, whose scripted slate was still in its infancy. But when Parks and Rec got picked up for a final season, they put their own project on hold, giving them time to think about creating something more original with Master of None.

At one point, Yang said he and Ansari were holed up in New York, trying to write, and feeling increasingly frustrated. “I told him, ‘My dad grew up basically in a tiny village in Taiwan. He had a pet chicken and he had to kill it because he didn’t have enough food to eat. So whatever happens, it’s all gravy because here we are in a hotel room talking about that television show we get to make.’” Ansari exclaimed, “That is way more interesting than any of the stuff that happens to us!” The duo decided to “make episodes about other people’s points of views,” including one threaded with flashbacks to the immigrant experiences of Ramesh and Peter, the dads of Ansari and Yang’s fictional alter-egos, who share some of their stories over dinner at a restaurant.

Yang is telling me this over dinner at Majordomo, David Chang’s buzzy, senses-overloading Korean fusion palace on the outskirts of downtown L.A. The chef (who has his own TV show, Ugly Delicious) is a friend of Yang’s, something immediately clear from the way they enthusiastically bro-hug, and accentuated throughout the night, as a string of amazing but unordered dishes arrives at our table—special treatment that starts to feel like a delicious stamina test.“You’re ready, you’re ready!” Yang coaxes me encouragingly at one point, as the waiter whisks away several half-eaten plates, filling the cleared space with a glistening serving of pork belly.

Food played a huge part in Master of None, as did the hyphenated-consciousness of Asian-Americans. At the 2016 Emmys, accepting the prize for outstanding-series comedy writing along with Ansari, Yang noted, “There are 17 million Asian-Americans in this country, and there are 17 million Italian-Americans. They have The Godfather, Goodfellas, The Sopranos . . . we got [Sixteen Candles character] Long Duk Dong. We’ve got a long way to go.”

Yang seems to be doing his part to fill that chasm. He describes Little America as, “like Black Mirror, but instead of being super-dark sci-fi stories, it is immigrant stories,” while his family saga, Tigertail, jumps between current day New York and Taiwan in the 1950s, 60s, and 70s. “Even three years ago, I wouldn’t have thought it was possible,” he said of writing and directing the latter. “But now, I think, generally, things are changing—not only for me, but for everybody.” It doesn’t hurt that the movie now follows in the wake of Crazy Rich Asians, which domestically grossed $34 million in the first five days of its release.

“I’m excited to try to make a movie where there are three-dimensional, smart, funny, interesting, hopefully compelling characters, who happen to be Asian,” Yang continued. “My favorite stuff, no matter what the genre, is character-driven stories [and] specific details that animate that character’s point of view. So their background matters sometimes, and what they look like matters, and where they came from matters.”

Yang came from Riverside, California, the child of immigrant parents. A self-described “tiny Asian kid in big glasses,” he said he avoided getting bullied by being one of the fastest runners on the playground. He showed me an Instagram post from Bobby Hundreds, a streetwear designer and former schoolmate, who wrote that Yang “was the kid my parents were constantly comparing me to. ‘Why can’t you be more like Alan?!’ He was the smartest kid by a mile, never got into trouble, and got accepted to Harvard. But the annoying part was that he was actually really COOL. Like, he played in a band and stuff. So, I couldn’t even hate on stupid Alan Yang.”

At Harvard, Yang studied biology because his parents had instilled in him the idea that science and math were a safe zone for people of color. “When things are subjective, that’s when things get taken away from you,” he said. “If you are an immigrant and you write an essay, a teacher who may not have the same perspective as you might dock your grade,” whereas, “if you get all the answers right on the math test, you got them right, they can’t take that away from you.” Yet Yang gravitated toward the arts—playing around Boston in a group called Model Kit, dating a girl in a band, and writing for the Harvard Lampoon. He says with a grin, “I wanted to hang out with smart people and creative people.”

Pursuing that path led ultimately to his current life, where he gets to collaborate on projects with people like Nanjiani and Gordon, and invent a black version of Friends for Jay-Z’s “Moonlight” video. The experience surrounding the making of the extended video—which stars Issa Rae, Lakeith Stanfield, Tiffany Haddish, Jerrod Carmichael, and Tessa Thompson—felt like “a dream,” said Yang. “Like I was sleepwalking.”

Fred Armisen and Maya Rudolph in a scene from Forever.

Colleen Hayes

And then there’s Forever, his new Amazon show starring Armisen and Rudolph, a dramedy so unusual in tone and structure that it presents considerable problems for a journalist faced with trying to describe it without spoilers. It is a story about a suburban neighborhood, an ordinary couple, marital malaise, and also . . . it’s not.

“Alan was talking about a lot of the creative freedoms he had enjoyed making Master of None,” Rudolph recalled by phone of their first meeting to discuss a possible collaboration.

“I was most interested in having them play more grounded characters, and play more naturalistic scenes,” Yang said. “That’s my taste generally. I know that they’re such skilled sketch performers but I just felt like they could do sort of gentler, quieter stuff.” He tapped his friend and former Parks and Rec cohort Hubbard to partner with him. The duo, said Rudolph, “had such a great take on the life of a relationship,” and developed roles that would allow her and Armisen to stretch beyond the kind of broad characters they inhabited on S.N.L.

In Forever, Armisen and Rudolph play June and Oscar, a long-married couple in suburban Riverside, Yang’s hometown. They adore each other, but there is always the sneaking sensation, as Yang put it, of, “Is that all there is?” The answer in Forever is a surprising mix of yes and no, as the series repeatedly pulls the narrative rug out from under its characters and its viewers. Among the disruptive elements in the series is Catherine Keener as a rebellious, charismatic neighbor who inflames June’s sense of frustration and longing.

“There’s some crazy shit that happens,” Yang said, emitting a laugh that actually sounds like a distinct ha-ha-ha. He emphasized that he wanted to unravel the traditional half-hour comedy series structure and to keep “the isolation and the loneliness of domesticity . . . somewhat tethered to the reality that people go through, to still be relatable.” After apologizing for name-checking so many “pretentious-ass films that people will hate me for mentioning,” Yang cited David Lynch, Wim Wenders, Tim Burton, and Krzysztof Kieślowski as some of the directors that inspired elements of Forever.

“He definitely goes there with his references,” Rudolph said affectionately. “Sometimes I just say, ‘Yeah!’ because I don’t know what Eastern Bloc filmmaker he is talking about!”

As for the future, Yang said he doesn’t know if there will be a third season of Master of None, but it’s not impossible. (“Aziz and I are always talking,” he wrote via e-mail.) And Yang is leaving the door open for another season of Forever, if this series about married life and existential turmoil can find its audience. He knows that it is “a weird show”—and a slow-building one that goes against Amazon’s current mission of creating noisy, Game of Thrones-scale hits.

But then with so many networks and platforms competing for attention, it’s actually the perfect time “to make something that is interesting and bold and new and audacious,” Yang argued. “In this environment, why make a show that seems like every other show?”

Get Vanity Fair’s HWD Newsletter

Joy PressJoy Press is a T.V. Correspondent for Vanity Fair. Her book, Stealing the Show: How Women Are Revolutionizing Television, was released in February.

Source: https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2018/09/alan-yang-discusses-his-new-amazon-series-forever-and-possible-plans-for-master-of-none-season-three

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marcusssanderson · 6 years ago

Text

A Guide To Erasing Bad Habits From Your Life

Breaking Bad Habits Once And For All.

Erasing bad habits can be very hard sometimes, especially if you do not know the right way to do so.

I wrote this post from through the lens of addiction because it is so prevalent in our society and it’s one of my primary treatment focuses with my clients.

I’ve seen how many people on the road to success get sabotaged by the false promises of drugs and alcohol. It’s can be tough when managing a high-stress, high-achieving life to not give in to insecurities or emotional struggles that lead to sabotaging behaviors.

When I talk about “bad habits” I focus on an alcoholic example, but this could easily be emotional eating, gaming, compulsive shopping, sexual promiscuity, or any other self-sabotaging behavior.

Making and Breaking Habits go Hand-in-Hand

Making and breaking habits are often tied together in how our mind works. We often break one habit by initiating another. For instance, quitting smoking is usually replaced by some other stress-reducing behavior like implementing a daily walking routine.

There is varied data on how long it takes to initiate a new habit or break one. There is research demonstrating evidence for it taking a few weeks to almost a year to change habitual behavior. It all depends on how quickly it integrates into our routine and becomes “automatic” – like pouring your first cup of coffee or brushing your teeth in the morning.

Current and popular research on habit formation points to a repetition of the behavior as well as having a cue as the antecedents to change. Looking at the implementation of a walking routine, the cue may be the time of day – i.e. upon waking up, you would get dressed an out the door within 30 minutes. If you practiced that daily, at some point you wouldn’t have to remind yourself; you would just wake and get ready to go for your walk.

How do we know a habit is bad for us?

We’ve known for many decades about the positive and negative reinforcement loops of engaging in behavior repetitively (think Pavlov’s dogs). Lately, a more recent, but still decades-old study is making the rounds on the internet: the Rat Park study of addiction in the 1970’s. In that study, rats were socially isolated and provided a steady stream of opiates to calm their assumed distress at living an isolated life.

At a later point in time, the rats were provided a community of other rats to mingle with. They were also still provided the option of numbing themselves with the opiates, but they found that when the rats were socially supported they did not choose the drug.

That leads to the question at hand: How do we know a habit is bad for us? When something reinforces us positively, we continue to do it.

It has been assumed that when the rats were socially isolated, they engaged in the continued opiate use because it made their rat life more tolerable. Then, when they had other rats to play with, they no longer needed the pharmacological experience since they were now getting other positive benefits from playing with their park pals.

When we explore drug abuse and reinforcement in humans, the early stage of drug and alcohol use indeed does give the user a positive effect.

The initial “positive” effects of using drugs/alcohol are:

The user often becomes more socially outgoing

When one is lonely, the drugs can numb the emotions

Using substances helps one to “forget their troubles”

The user can often get a false boost in self-esteem

Although these are short-lived “benefits” the person who experienced them will often seek to repeat that feeling or experience, leading to repetitive engagement in that behavior. So we end up with a cue of, say, feeling insecure before a party leading to a repeated behavior of drinking before going to social events.

Because the emotional payoff can be so strong, it becomes easy to overlook the early instances of “negative reinforcement” that occurs (i.e. hangovers, sexual promiscuity) and just continue engaging in the behavior we believe will give us a positive effect.

Of course, as use continues, the positive effects become over-shadowed by the negative effects, but the user becomes both psychologically and physiologically dependent on them so they continue to use.

There is something to be said about the negative effects that keep one in that feedback loop as well. Many addicts start to get comfortable in the role of being the one that can’t be relied upon or needing to be taken care of.

When they start living in that role, their loved ones often stop putting responsibilities on them or see them as helpless due to the addiction. Their loved ones may be frustrated with them, but again, the positives outweigh the negative even when the “positive” is a ‘negative”.

This starts to get convoluted and confusing, but to understand it better think of it this way: Joe began drinking because he was frustrated that he was always working so hard and felt his wife should help out more financially.

Over time, Joe became less functional and his wife ended up having to get a better paying job in order to support the family because Joe was no longer able to do it because of his drinking. You see, Joe got exactly what he wanted, but it was at the expense of his self-worth and his marriage. No one would ever recommend this as a way to get your emotional needs met.

In the end, a habit is bad for us if it affects the quality of our daily life. For as much as Joe got what he wanted, his life was no longer the same and had dramatically taken a turn for the worse, emotionally, physically and financially.

The reinforcement loop needs to be broken so that Joe starts to learn more effective ways to get his emotional needs met (i.e. communicating with his wife instead of drinking to numb his emotions).

The Role Rewards Play in Breaking Bad Habits

For as much as we need a strong cue and repetition to form new habits, we also need a good dose of positive rewards on the flip side when breaking bad habits. Let’s look at Joe and his alcoholism.

In the early stage of breaking his habit, Joe will need a hefty dose of positive reinforcement to outweigh the alcohol addiction because his addicted mind will be screaming loudly at him to not change his behavior.

Some rewards that might benefit Joe are:

His wife begins to give him some responsibility back, improving his sense of self-worth and importance in the family

His boss gives him some kudos for showing up for work on time consistently,

His kids start spending more time with him.

His wife starts to listen to him when she sees that he wants to participate in the family again.

These rewards also become automatic and expected. Joe becomes motivated to stay sober because he realizes he has a sense of purpose in his family, his wife listens when he talks about his needs and his kids want to be around him. Joe has a better chance at maintaining his behavior change as long as he can still feel the reward.

5 Ways to Avoid Bad Habits

1.) Listen to your emotional needs – You may be a high-achieving, driven person who’s always on the go! Go! GO! Even you need a break sometimes.

Listen to your mind and body and know when to take a day (or 2 or 3) off. You and the people you are working for will appreciate that you are the best version of you, rather than a tired, bitter, over-worked one.

2.) Ask for help when you need it – Just like Joe who didn’t tell his wife he needed help because he expected her to “just know” or see that he was distressed, we can’t assume our partners can read our minds. Somewhere along the route to achievement, it seems we get instilled with the idea that asking for help is a sign of weakness and the idea of acting on the impulse gets over-shadowed by shame, guilt or pride.

Don’t make Joe’s mistake and expect your partner to read your mind. No matter how much your partner loves you or how well your business partner knows you, no one is a mind-reader (and you can’t be and at them for not meeting your needs if you don’t tell them what they are).

3.) Don’t listen to that negative voice in your head – I know you know what I’m talking about. You can be on a great path to success or you can already have reached heights you never dreamed of, and yet, that little voice in the back of your mind comes creeping around the corner to tell you “you’re not good enough” or “it’s not going to last” or “everyone’s going to find out you are just faking it”.

CUT. IT. OUT! At the very first inkling of that voice, pull yourself out of your head – engage in something that brings you into focus in your present environment: notice the sounds around you, make eye contact with someone, re-engage in conversation with someone. What if you’re all alone in a silent room (ala bedtime)?

Tell yourself something different – tell yourself the TRUTH! You are competent! You are exactly who others think you are! You don’t have time to let negative thoughts get you down and you definitely don’t have time to have them lead to sabotaging bad habits.

4.) Do something each week that is just for you with no goal attached to it – For me, exercise keeps me sane, for others, it’s drawing, knitting, skating, singing, playing in a band, reading, cooking or any number of other things that just speak to one’s soul and lets you know that no matter how busy you think you are, there is always a few hours to be in touch with what fuels your spirit.

5.) Stay socially engaged – Just like the rats in the Rat Park study, we need connection with others. Staying socially engaged allows us the freedom to express ourselves and be heard by others, gives us a sense of community when our lives might otherwise feel isolated, and, of course, one of the biggest factors in self-sabotaging behavior and bad habits seems to be spurred by a sense of not feeling like we belong.

We need to feel like we belong. Especially in the case of drug and alcohol abuse we know one of the most prevalent factors in achieving and maintaining sobriety is when one has a sense of community. Try it – Next time you’re feeling alone, reach out to someone you haven’t talked to in a while – I bet you’ll both feel better for it.

The post A Guide To Erasing Bad Habits From Your Life appeared first on Everyday Power Blog.

0 notes

marcusssanderson · 6 years ago

Text

A Guide To Erasing Bad Habits From Your Life

Breaking Bad Habits Once And For All.

Erasing bad habits can be very hard sometimes, especially if you do not know the right way to do so.

I wrote this post from through the lens of addiction because it is so prevalent in our society and it’s one of my primary treatment focuses with my clients.

When I talk about “bad habits” I focus on an alcoholic example, but this could easily be emotional eating, gaming, compulsive shopping, sexual promiscuity, or any other self-sabotaging behavior.

Making and Breaking Habits go Hand-in-Hand

How do we know a habit is bad for us?

That leads to the question at hand: How do we know a habit is bad for us? When something reinforces us positively, we continue to do it.

When we explore drug abuse and reinforcement in humans, the early stage of drug and alcohol use indeed does give the user a positive effect.

The initial “positive” effects of using drugs/alcohol are:

The user often becomes more socially outgoing

When one is lonely, the drugs can numb the emotions

Using substances helps one to “forget their troubles”

The user can often get a false boost in self-esteem

The reinforcement loop needs to be broken so that Joe starts to learn more effective ways to get his emotional needs met (i.e. communicating with his wife instead of drinking to numb his emotions).

The Role Rewards Play in Breaking Bad Habits

For as much as we need a strong cue and repetition to form new habits, we also need a good dose of positive rewards on the flip side when breaking bad habits. Let’s look at Joe and his alcoholism.

Some rewards that might benefit Joe are:

His wife begins to give him some responsibility back, improving his sense of self-worth and importance in the family

His boss gives him some kudos for showing up for work on time consistently,

His kids start spending more time with him.

His wife starts to listen to him when she sees that he wants to participate in the family again.

5 Ways to Avoid Bad Habits

1.) Listen to your emotional needs – You may be a high-achieving, driven person who’s always on the go! Go! GO! Even you need a break sometimes.

The post A Guide To Erasing Bad Habits From Your Life appeared first on Everyday Power Blog.

0 notes

marcusssanderson · 6 years ago

Text

A Guide To Erasing Bad Habits From Your Life

Breaking Bad Habits Once And For All.

Erasing bad habits can be very hard sometimes, especially if you do not know the right way to do so.

I wrote this post from through the lens of addiction because it is so prevalent in our society and it’s one of my primary treatment focuses with my clients.

When I talk about “bad habits” I focus on an alcoholic example, but this could easily be emotional eating, gaming, compulsive shopping, sexual promiscuity, or any other self-sabotaging behavior.

Making and Breaking Habits go Hand-in-Hand

How do we know a habit is bad for us?

That leads to the question at hand: How do we know a habit is bad for us? When something reinforces us positively, we continue to do it.

When we explore drug abuse and reinforcement in humans, the early stage of drug and alcohol use indeed does give the user a positive effect.

The initial “positive” effects of using drugs/alcohol are:

The user often becomes more socially outgoing

When one is lonely, the drugs can numb the emotions

Using substances helps one to “forget their troubles”

The user can often get a false boost in self-esteem

The reinforcement loop needs to be broken so that Joe starts to learn more effective ways to get his emotional needs met (i.e. communicating with his wife instead of drinking to numb his emotions).

The Role Rewards Play in Breaking Bad Habits

For as much as we need a strong cue and repetition to form new habits, we also need a good dose of positive rewards on the flip side when breaking bad habits. Let’s look at Joe and his alcoholism.

Some rewards that might benefit Joe are:

His wife begins to give him some responsibility back, improving his sense of self-worth and importance in the family

His boss gives him some kudos for showing up for work on time consistently,

His kids start spending more time with him.

His wife starts to listen to him when she sees that he wants to participate in the family again.

5 Ways to Avoid Bad Habits

1.) Listen to your emotional needs – You may be a high-achieving, driven person who’s always on the go! Go! GO! Even you need a break sometimes.

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