#also alt versions because i cant choose anything

[pannotian]

Did you forget something at home?

[garak]

ok ill put it under the cut but heres my logic

the downfall of us all - good overarching track what can i say. that town WOULD be the downfall of them all!

the caves of altamira - i have an amv for this one that i might actually make at some point. about them trying to find new ways of living as kids sneaking out together and also being part of the #cycle

somewhere i belong - self explanatory. might have another version of this later to represent the infinite tsukuyomi

the end of nothing - warring states period fighting... lowkey i also want a reprise of this during the fight but i dont think they ever did an alt version or demo or anything so whatever

only a fool would say that - self explanatory. might get moved to being hashirama playlist only but for now it stays.

noise and kisses - the creation of peace... let me see your insides = mdrs whole can two people ever really know each other thing and him thinking hashirama almost killing himself meant they finally had seen each others guts or whatever it is he says

to plant a seed - theeeee founders national anthem. our vision for this world will not die when we are dead

in fate's hands - more founding of the village era stuff. the brief period where they thought they had actually done it

the taste of ink - more them thinking theyve achieved it and broken the cycle lol

crush - this song is on thin ice but when he said war into a truce i was like fine. you can be in there. more village era

with our love - get it guys. the look = the sharingan. otherwise this is a very self explanatory song for the choosing of the hokage

baby blue - hashirama is elected hokage and madara makes his decision to leave. this song is a core pillar of this playlist (nodding)

divine intervention - the building tension between them... this one i imagine the perspective switches between them

king for a day - classic madara song. nothing else needs to be said.

reinventing your exit - you broke my heart again this time :(

anthem of our dying day - mdr leaving the village. ghost to this world foreshadowing his role as the ghost of the uchiha and his erasure from konoha's history. fire motif needs no explanation

speak of the devil - another very self explanatory song. some lines i would tweak but mostly theyre unintelligible so its ok.

fast car - you just have to believe me here. but to me this is a classic madara song. its here chronologically as a final look at their relationship before he leaves for good

the leaving song - ty vince for this one. this whole album is very madara but this song in particular is the perfect leaving the village track.

to hell and back - aftermath of mdr leaving and the buildup to their fight. that day = their final conversation

the plot to bomb the panhandle - this one gets moved around a lot because i cant decide where i want it but its also pretty self explanatory

your betrayal - this is also a core track like you said that wed be together how could you kill me and lie to my face come on... im in your head im in your heart like come on. it's them.

my life for hire - i broke the mold somehow when its them unknowingly repeating the cycle yessss the cycle clap if you love the cycle

it's complicated - madahashi national anthem. rare hashirama perspective track too

turbo lover - fun break. also i think around now in the timeline (around the time of their fight) is when hsrm and mito get married so i like to laugh at tell me theres no other.

the last fight - title says it all...

dance with the devil - end of the fight. hashirama tries to adjust to life without madara. beginning of the visions for us hashirama hallucination truthers

play dead - madara in his damn cave. thank you again vince for this track

you be tails ill be sonic - could they have named this something more serious come on guys. but this track is theeee hashirama after madara's death song like i tried to make us a life here but our foundation was built on sand... and was

until the end - another hashirama after madaras death song. maybe around the start of the first war as he loses faith in achieving full peace in his lifetime

my apocalypse - hashirama hallucination truthers how we feeling

can't be saved - wow it's a lot of hashirama songs here all in a row. killing yourself AND alcoholism? thats the hashirama i know.

last of the real ones - which of you guys had the amv with this song for them. i want to congratulate you on getting me to like a song from mania. i really thought it would never happen

where do all my friends go - madara putting the plan into motion, spying on konoha, recruiting his lackeys, then getting revived only to see his plan has gone to shit lol

light with a sharpened edge - the infinite tsukuyomi fails and they are able to finally be together in death after both their ideologies have been proven to be duds and they ultimately forgive each other acknowledging how far theyve strayed from those kids at the river. this song could go plenty of different places but i put it at the end because it starts you over at the beginning

there are def some periods that i could flesh out with more tracks but thats the current state its in... if you have any suggestions feel free to comment or send me your madahashi playlists to steal from lol

i have TENTATIVELY ordered my madahashi playlist... ive tried to smooth some of the crazier genre transitions but mostly it should be in chronological order besides the downfall of us all which is the thesis track. i have elaborate amvs for basically every single one of these songs in my mind

[strawberryspeachy]

K. I know alt stands for ASSITANT language teacher

But 2 things. 1) assitants fucking DO THINGS

2) the way they sell this job is like youre a teacher.

Constantly in this job i am treated like a clown.

And im gonna tag this and im probably gonna receive the same comments i get irl from rose tinted glassed ‘japanese people can do no wrong’ people

Thus far ive worked in 4 junior highs and 3 elementarys

Most of the teachers no matter where they are just seem so incompetent

Its no big deal that the teachers arent fluent in english - isnt that literally why alts are here??? So why don’t they ever take advice?!???

Im so fucking sick of being told how to speak my fucking language.

And not the ‘speak slower’ ‘speak simpler’ thats fine and ill accept criticism on my ability to communicate to people learning english as a second language. Not that.

Grammar, pronunciation, sentence structure - and what sounds natural

I hate the videos that are made for classrooms. And the fucking books

“A native speaker wrote it” - k no. Having worked here i know exactly how that went down. A japanese person wrote it, then went to either a business kiss ass ‘japan can do no wrong’ person. Or. Bullied someone into saying it was good by doing that annoying ass thing japanese people do

Where they ask the question over and over with “ok?�� At the end. Cause they dont want an answer - they just wanna be told that theyre right or to do whatever they want. And they do not plan on receiving any answer besides “youre correct”

Its awkward cause ive literally been annoyed at my friend in the past for complaining about having a job where she does nothing and gets paid. Now i feel bad because i HATE going to work to sit and do nothing. But honestly - it has more to do with the fact that of all of my schools - only 1 has given me a nice place to sit.

Not a table that they store junk on and pretend to be surprised by me everytime im there like “oops sorry theres all this stuff (but like youre not a real person and we hate that youre here so just be happy we tolerate your existance and tell is your happy to have giant things all over your desk literally sticking in your face)”

Not the extra desk behind the printer that blows dust in my face as it goes off every 20 seconds

Not the desk under the aircon blowing on me/ in the corner next to the coldest window/door

Not a literal broken chair

Not a desk in the path of the class files where teachers have to constantly get to the spot directly behind me

And i was also that person thatd say ‘well if you dont like it - quit - theres plenty of people who WANT that job’

But like it fucking sucks. Cause i have experienced REALLY good teachers who actually team teach with you. I have had one school where i worked full time and got to see my students more than once a month - hence being able to actually get to know them and want them get better. I have been at a school with wonderful staff who welcome me into the school like im an actual person - not like ‘oh is today already the day we let the rat in the school to make the children smile again. Ugh.’

It fucking sucks. I linger on the hope of being able to work at a good school with good teachers full time

I cant find a better job because im a ‘beginner’ and corona

And im stuck getting treated like shit

I AM NOT a kiss ass. Never have been. It kills me to have to work with people who dont want me around

Most of the teachers i work with ARE NEVER PREPARED like wtf why??? Why dont you EVER plan ahead??? When im not prepared its because i have to wait to get instruction from you - you get to chose what you do

And they do basically nothing (not all like ive said ive worked with good teachers)

But most just

Read the book OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. The students memorize the book passages - they have no clue about the context and if you ask them the same exact question but with a different subject like “do you have any shoes” instead of “do you have any bags” theyre lost. The teacher can get them to answer by saying the exact phrase from the book - but they dont know what theyre saying or how theyre actually answering. They just have it memorized

Then some teachers will have “conversation practice” where they take those exact sentences out if the book - put them together to form an awkward ‘conversation’ and then the students just read it.

Ooohhh look at them. Having a conversation!

Play fucking bingo.... why? They dont even make the students repeat the words for pronunciation practice - why the fuck do you play bingo everyday

Sing songs. UGHHHHH yea that could be fun if these 60 year old teachers would stop forcing shit from the 1940s on the teenage students. I cant decide if music too old for 30 year olds is worse or teachers who take japanese songs that have been translated into english is - lol you fucking hate english so much you cant find ONE english song to sing??? WHY are you teaching english?! - god forbid you let the students choose

Teachers who just give the students the day date and weather....??????????? Cool. Youve managed to ensure they cant come up with the simplest of fucking English questions on their own. Do you carry around those cards to look like you do a lot at your job when you dont? Oh yea probably

Because being in a school watching teachers is the way i learned that japan values looking busy over being productive. If you look stressed and busy all day - you are better than a person who got shit done but looked relaxed.

Why do you use the recordings when i am in the class?????????????????????????????????? THATS LITERALLY THE ONLY REASON YOU APPARENTLY HAVE ME THERE

K and like i said. I have worked with good teachers. In their classes the students are better at english (hur hur funny how that works) those teachers encourage the students to talk with me. Those teachers let the students try to come up with answers and questions on their own. Those students try and ask the teacher when they dont know how to say something to help with translation.

The shit teachers on the other hand - will jump in and stop a student who looks excited to try and trying to figure out how to say something. What does this teach them? Dont try. Just stay silent - the japanese teacher will just talk in japanese again soon - no need to try.

Jumping off that. Students who are good at english or go to juku - will dumb themselves down in classes with shitty teachers. Theyve learned its not good to know more or even nearly as much english as the teacher - pretend you dont understand. Pretends you don’t know how to say things - itll make my stupid teacher feel good. So. If i try to talk or do anything in those classes, even the students who understand will stop trying.

Speaking of just going back to japanese. WHY IS MOST OF ENGLISH CLASS IN JAPNESE???? Most of the teahers will jump at ANY chance to switch back over into japanese. English is just sprinkled into the class. Then they pretend to wonder why the students dont try and why theyre bad at english

And things ive been told in the last year

Dont ever be upset about anything ever

Lol yea just that for one

K but dont ever be upset about teachers doing ANYTHING because theyre just so GOSH DARN BUSYYYYYYYYY

Lol like intially i thought that was why ASSISTANT was in my title. I THOUGHT we were supposed to make them less busy by helping out with planning and grading and blah blah

Nope cause

‘Oh offer to help them! BUT dont be upset when they decline because theyd have to explain to you ANYTHING and.....’

So. Im a child?! I cant be trusted to do anything without proper instruction

Well yea exactly cause

“Oh! Hes probably your babysister haha! Japanese people are so nice! They usually have one teacher look out for you and help you with stuff - besides the head teacher- lol theyre kinda like your babysitter!<3”

K. So like. I need a bachelors degree for this job. Let me say again I NEEDED A COLLEGE DEGREE FOR THIS JOB. i had to move ACCROSS THE WORLD by myself. I have to ge able to fill out federal documents and find a house and pay my bills and follow foregn laws and figure out my way in a foregn country - but i need a BABYSITTER at work?!?!?!?? If im a minute late ill be docked an hours pay. If i do ANYTHING that slightly upsets ANYONE and japanese ppl are offended by EVERYTHING - i am liable for all reprucussions. But. I need a BABYSITTER.

Cant be trusted to be in a class alone (dont be offended its because your not a certified teacher) that would make sense except that YALL THROW ALTS IN WITH THE SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS ALL THE TIME - thats supposed to be an EXTRA certification on top of teaching. but Im too fucking stupid and untrustable to do anything with regular students alone, but because you dont like dealing with spefial needs - i can teach them alone.

You dont actually read their hw or check for correctness and most of their tests are just for fun it seems - but i cant be trusted to grade those either

You do the exact same lesson everyday and i only see each class once a month - but dont let me create any activity or lesson for them. Also dont tell me your plans until class is starting and then change it throughout the class and act surprised when idk what the fuck youre doing because you changed your mind while talking at them in japanese

Speaking of changing. I hate teachers who constantly change how they do shit. And again. Get annoyed at me when i cant follow their flow. Do i say hello first or do you? Are we even saying hello today? Am i asking how they are or are you? Are we letting them answer? Are we answering? Whose asking the day date and weather? Are we asking them for the day date and weather?? Whose saying goodbye? Are we saying goodbye? Which bingo version have you chosen today? Are they repeating the words? Yes? No? Am i saying each one twice? Do i have to spell out the fucking word today? Fast? Slow? What hell are you putting me through today

And when they ask me to take charge of an activity. But then change their mind. But then no no you go ahead please take charge. K no just kidding ill tell you and them what to do. Actually no you can keep going please be in control. K no too much english i wanna hear more japanese ill be in control - hey everyone thank the alt for doing that activity with you (me and the students look at each other visibly confused)

These teachers will ask me a question and no matter how i answer its wrong. I always answer shortly initially because... of course. But theyll tell me to GO ON!!! theyll keep doing that. So ill start answering questions with substance - then theyll cut me off - so i go back to answering shortly but NO! CONTINUE!!! im constantly caught confused exactly what they want me to say and now i barely ever tell stories to the students. I stare at the jte the whole time trying to guage by their face if i should keep talking or make it short. Its also awkward cause sometimes they jump in to translate and other times they want me to just keep talking in english with no translation. Regardless whatever way i choose is never correct and they always look at me like im an idiot

Yesterday a teacher did one of the things inhate that prompted this I WANNA WRITE ABOUT HOW MUCH I HATE THIS JOB

Hes a sub. Hes supposed to do the same lessson as the other teachers. He is NEVER prepared. And he does everything bad. So when he didnt have the stuff for the activity he said he wants the students to have conversations with me. GREAT! thats what im here for! Lets do it. So then he shows them videos he has of other students talking with an alt at another school for 5 minutes. Um.... k. Then we open the book to a page of 3 example convo starters. Except. Japanese teachers dont seem to understand that the book is meant to be EXAMPLES. he says ah like this but maybe change. Good ok! I think were on the right track. Lets read these examples and get to it. Nope. He has them have the example sentences with their partner saying its good practice.

No. Its not. Theyre just reading the book and then when they finish saying

“Do you know any good restaurants around here?”

“Yes i do! Theres a curry place over there”

“oh i love curry!”

Theyre not gonna make up more at the ......

Theyre just gonna talk in japanese about other shit.

Then he says ok lets have conversations. Finally

Nope.

He has the class repeat after him together as a unit to me “do you know any good restaurants around here?”

GFFEIWBAKDHWNDGDIEBS RAGEEEE

I said ive had convos in class before may i try like before

He feigns confusion

I ask a student “what kind of food do you like?”

She says sushi

“What kind of sushi”

The students in this class were excitable and chimed in each time.

This time (as usual because they dont know the fish names in english) She begins talking with the kids around her trying to figure out what the english word is for the sushi she likes

But the teacher jumps in and shuts it all down

Because the students are just way too shy to talk in front of the class. Their english is too bad. They cant.

Its extra aggrivating because the teachers at this school range from good to decent - except him. That was a second year class. The last time i was at this school the first years had a introduction 1 on 1 test - with me. And i was to ask them a question at the end. With the other 3 teachers when i asked the question if they didnt understand. I would try saying it in another way. If they still didnt understand - i would answer my question as an example. If they still didnt understand i would give them answers like

“What tv do you like” “do you like anime?” Wait for yes or no “do you like youtube” wait for yes or no (and so on)

If they still didnt understand (very few got here) the japnese teacher would translate the question)

And. If they still didnt understand. We would give them an answer and coax them into repeating after us.

If they didnt. Then they didnt get the point for answering the question.

This teacher. Him being the 4th teacher to do this test with me. Would IMMEDIATELY translate the question if the student didnt answer quickly after me asking it once and then talk to them in japanese and tell me their answer or make one up to me with something like “oh ahah they dont know when yet. So he doesnt know. Maybe he ate breakfast before school!” And then would shoo the student away and call in the next.

^^^ and this is how most teachers are

They sit during class. They play unrelated videos. They spend half the class acting like theyre too confused about their plan to even teach the class (but if i try to do ANYTHING like talk to a student while they sit in front of the class rummaging through their folder going “うーん」 「じゃ」「じゃあー」「そして」「それから」「えーとー」 theyll instruct SOMETHING or play some recording over and over) have i mentioned how they never seem to want to talk in english or listen to students talk in english in english class?? Most of the time theyre just having aside conversations about nonsense in japanese. They read everything themselves despite me being there - in a way where they really just wannt hear themselves talk in english.

Just in general. I hate when teachers talk about me in front of me and dont tell me what the fuck theyre saying. And it’s annoying when students ask them stuff in japanese about me and then the students look at me waiting for me to respond/the teacher to translate their question- but the jte doesnt translate. Or they ask a question that im not in charge of the answer for so even though i understood the question they asked the jte i cant answer them because its not my decision and the jte doesnt wanna look like the asshole that gives them an answer they dont like so they just dont respond so that i look like the dick whose ignoring the students

They do this with regular questions too. Sometimes i hear the whole question and understand. So when the students look to me and the jte goes silent - i answer - then the jte gets all out of sorts because 1) they wanted me to look like an asshole who doesnt wanna talk to the students 2) they deemed the questions not important and didnt want it answered 3)ew! The alt knows more japanese than i thought and she knows what im doing and thats a little embarrassing also what else have i said in front of her today that she might have understand - awkward 4) oh no if students know she understands some japanese they might ask her stuff and i wont be the only means of the alt and students communicating 5) that awk silence just showed the students that i didnt plan to translate something to her and i wanted to blame her and say she doesnt wanna answer that but now i was made a liar of

These arent personal queations btw. For example a student asked why does the guy in one peice eat a lollypop in the america version instead of smoke a cigarette?

This is an incomplete liste. Just. Honestly being an ALT is draining.

I feel like im at a restaurant again just waisting my life away waiting tables.

I actually really like english so being forced to listen to people who are supposed to teach it - purposely teach it wrong and force me to use it incorrectly hurts

I hate watching people suck at their jobs....and be rewarded for sucking at their job

I hate feeling like an outsider in my workplace.

I wanna feel like a real teacher.... not a clown

I hate doing something where nothing i say, do, or feel matters.

That last one. I hate that i can be treated like shit in my workplace AND get in trouble for not thanking people FOR treating me like shit. Not just take it. Take it with a smile!!!

I try to focus on the good things... but its just so damn hard cause ther far and few between and honestly i just wanna feel like im actually an educator to my students and like i can actually be a teacher with the ones who like me and come talk to me and stuff. But its not like i have have a teacher student relationship with them - i cant be part of their school activities. I cant go to their school events. I wont be at the school with them for more than a year.

Even at good schools when the teachers like that you talk with the students - i always feel this vibe of ‘keep it superficial’ dont become an adult they would trust. Its like you can feel them watching - ready to jump in when they think the student should stop petting the stray before they get fleas

I have a lot of teachers i remember fondly. Who id talk to when i saw them even when i didnt have their class anymore. Id tell kids in grades below me that they were lucky if they got them. When i hear about things happening at the school after i leave im happy to hear they got something good. Teachers who helped me understand something better or were just nice to the obvious loser in the class or made me laugh

I wanna be one of them....

Not the police man that came into school a couple times. Or the guy with the birds. Or the nice lunch lady who let you take food when you didnt have money and pay it back the next day.

I wanna be a teacher with a name.

Or at least. Do one of the only things im actually good at

So this job is unfulfilling

[samraclaus]

Do em all boredom sucks

Thank u lets get personal: send me a number 
1: 6 of the songs you listen to most? - Bloom by the paper kites, somebody else by the 1975, beautiful sea from sing street, amnesia by 5sos, tarot by alt-j, and coming up roses from begin again 
2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? - either lily Collins, calum hood or Ezra Miller
3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17. - “…men have integrated feminist values into their lives, whether or not they use the label, and this is also an important barometer of the impact of feminism."
4: What do you think about most? - certain people in my life or sometimes death tbh 
5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?- "me too omg” from Nichole 
6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on? - with 
7: What’s your strangest talent? - I can imitate people and characters really well but they’re always weird voices 
8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence) - girls are beautiful. Boys are confusing but also beautiful. 
9: Ever had a poem or song written about you? - no :/
10: When is the last time you played the air guitar? - literally like an hour ago I do it so often lmao 
11: Do you have any strange phobias? - uhhhh I’m afraid of everything 
12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose? - the only thing that’s been in my nose is a really long qtip at the doctor and never again no thanks that’s scary 
13: What’s your religion? - Islam (not religious tho)
14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing? - probably taking a walk or going to the park 
15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? - behind but good candids are the best 
16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band? - either sir sly 
17: What was the last lie you told? - that I was okay and not to worry lmao 
18: Do you believe in karma? - kinda yeah 
19: What does your URL mean? - my name is samra but it gets autocorrected to Santa so it became a meme in my friend group 
20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength? - weakness: I guess my anxiety. Strength: staying positive outwardly 
21: Who is your celebrity crush? - Ezra Miller and calum hood 💕😭
22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping? - no
23: How do you vent your anger? - I either punch things or just yell at everyone 
24: Do you have a collection of anything? - a small collection of mugs!
25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? - hmm both are kinda stressful but I’d probably like video chatting more 
26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become? - not at all 
27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love? - I hate the sound of people chewing. I love the sound of hairdryers and vacuums. They make me sleepy 
28: What’s your biggest “what if”? - what if I died? Or. What if I actually told people how I feel?
29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens? - yes to both!!! - 
30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm. - right arm: basket. Left: pillow
31: Smell the air. What do you smell? - nothing really tbh 
32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to? - louder than life 
33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast? - east!
34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender? - Calum lmao 
35: To you, what is the meaning of life? - making the most of the time you have even if you mess up along the way. But for a depressing version: you live and then you die. That’s it
36: Define Art. - anything that you make that represents something and you think is beautiful 
37: Do you believe in luck? - kinda
38: What’s the weather like right now? - warm 
39: What time is it? - 11:39 pm
40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed? - not yet 
41: What was the last book you read? - cellist of Sarajevo 
42: Do you like the smell of gasoline? - love it
43: Do you have any nicknames? - my dad calls me samronis and some people call me sam 
44: What was the last film you saw? - uhhhh I think holes (what a night lmao) 
45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had? - I broke my arm on my scooter 
46: Have you ever caught a butterfly? - no, I used to think they were kinda scary. I don’t now but still no 
47: Do you have any obsessions right now? - flowers probably 
48: What’s your sexual orientation? - bisexual 
49: Ever had a rumour spread about you? - I think once in middle school, it was really dumb, someone just said that I said something mean about my friend 
50: Do you believe in magic? - not really 
51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong? - sometimes, but I usually just let it go cause I feel bad lol 
52: What is your astrological sign? - taurus 
53: Do you save money or spend it? - usually spend :/ 
54: What’s the last thing you purchased?- sour patch kids 
55: Love or lust? - either but love is better 
56: In a relationship? - not right now 
57: How many relationships have you had? - only a couple 
58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue? - no :/
59: Where were you yesterday? - moving back and forth from my old house to my new house
60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you? - literally my entire room lmao 
61: Are you wearing socks right now? - always 
62: What’s your favourite animal? - guineas 🐹
63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you? - I actually don’t have one, I just live my life 
64: Where is your best friend? - I have no idea tbh but probably at home 
65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr. - imsograntired (my sister), blushedaesthetic (erin), granterin (other erin), and basically all of my friends tbh 
66: What is your heritage? - Turkish??
67: What were you doing last night at 12AM? - taking a shower and texting sam 
68: What do you think is Satan’s last name? - trump 
69: Biggest turn ons? - personality: humor, sarcasm, if you're a good person, cocky but not too much ya know. Physically: tall, nice hands(hands are so important wow 👀)
70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend? - eh I guess, I try my best to be a good friend 
71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? - SAVE THE DOG WTF ILL LIVE ON THE STREETS WITH HIM 
72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? - id probably tell people but make sure they don’t freak out too much and have them so funny things with me b) What do you do with your remaining days? Id do things with my family and friends all day every day and travel a bit if I can. Id tell people what I’ve always wanted to tell them without being scared. c) Would you be afraid? - I’m afraid of what happens after death, if it’s simply nothing, that’s what scares me. It’s impossible for someone to think of what it’s like to be absolutely nothing. I won’t even know I’m nothing because I’ll just be gone. But a big fear is how upset my family would be. I would hate to hurt them like that 
73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love. - love 
74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it? - a beautiful sea from sing street 
75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number? - 9203
76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship? - trust, compatibility, not taking everything seriously 
77: How can I win your heart? - be there for me, give me space if I ask for it, talk to me all the time tbh and watch movies with me 
78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?- probably 
79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far? - i haven’t made many good ones so I honestly can’t think of any rn 
80: What size shoes do you wear? - 8-9
81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone? - “life is hard when you’re an idiot"
82: What is your favourite word? - UGH I LITERALLY TOLD SULTANA MY FAVORITE WORD YESTERDAY AND I CANT REMEMBER NOW
83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. - love 
84: What is a saying you say a lot? - what do I even say ever these are so hard 
85: What’s the last song you listened to? - a.m. By 1D 
86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours? - dark green and pastel pink
87: What is your current desktop picture? - a picture of me and my friends 
88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be? - Donald trump 
89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on? - "do you like ___” I’m weird with this question because even when I do like someone a lot, I just get really scared and end up lying and I hate that about myself. I need to be pushed 
90: Turn offs? - not caring about my problems, ignoring me
91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power? - reading minds or flying 
92: where are your parents from? - Bosnia! 
93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be? - while my aunt was in the hospital 
94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be? - definitely calum 
95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? - Italy!!
96: Do you have any relatives in jail? - not that I know of 
97: Have you ever thrown up in the car? - yes, and right on my sister too. I had too much mayonnaise :/
98: Ever been on a plane? - yes ugh I hate planes 
99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say - i would be too stressed to talk to the whole world so I have no idea