#also a good solid reminder to always download music i like

[causalityparadoxes]

Was listening to EPIC like hmmmm some of this feels off... only to realise they'd remastered/redone the first 2 sagas and I was in fact listening to entirely different god damn songs!

After looking into why, good for them! 1000%! Love the new versions! But also... does anyone have good quality mp3s of the original albums...? 🥺👉👈 please hit me up. I wanna still be able to listen to the og versions too

[betweenthetimeandsound]

Three Minutes to Eternity: My ESC 250 (#160-151)

(Author's note: Sorry about it being a couple of days late--I wanted to rest a bit--which I will do again because we hit the top 150--and had to download quite a bit for the gifs. Please enjoy this bunch, though!)

#160: Dihaj -- Skeletons (Azerbaijan 2017)

“When we hook up it’s fantasy We’re just like alchemy I’ve never been so ready”

I completely neglected Skeletons during the contest, as I didn't listen to it beforehand and didn't watch songs 12-17 when watching the grand final live. Along with "Grab the Moment" that year, it sandwiched a horrendous stretch of songs in #13-16.

Despite this, I listened to it a lot afterwards. It’s equal parts intriguing and mysterious, especially with the almost-nonsensical lyrics with interesting images. I always imagined a concept film in which the main character meets a potential love interest in a night club, only to go too far and almost kill him.

The atmosphere the staging created was a bit strange, in that it incorporates masks and a world inside a school chalkboard. For each of these aspects, Skeletons is my favorite Azeri entry ever—it stands out in a unique way because of its eccentricity.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 14th/26 GF in Kyiv

#159: Tommy Seebach -- Disco Tango (Denmark 1979)

“Hun er en stjerne på et dansegulv Slår John Travolta i en rock ‘n’ roll På diskoteket ta’r hun kegler, og der ka’ man se Dem stå i kø og skæve, hver gang hun gør sin entré”

“She’s a star on a dance floor Beats John Travolta in a rock ‘n’ roll At the disco she’s scoring, and there you see Them queue up with an eye on her, every time she enters”

Disco and tango are two genres you don’t expect to work together, despite them being so fun to dance to. Despite this, Tommy Seebach makes it sound natural. There’s a bit of adjustment needed when listening to it, but it’s equally flirty and groovy all at once, as one gets to know the many quirks of the song.

The live performance definitely elevates it--not only with Debbie Cameron's enthusiasm (she would come back two years later with Tommy in a bigger part), but also because of the orchestration. The mix with strings and castanets in the chorus was definitely the best part and gets me shaking.

It’s different for Denmark, but definitely a song you should put in a disco (*clap clap*) from time to time!

Personal ranking: 3rd/19 Actual ranking: 6th/19 in Jerusalem

#158: Poli Genova -- If Love (Were) a Crime (Bulgaria 2016)

“Unafraid, never fade When it’s dark we illuminate”

Bulgaria’s comeback after a two-year hiatus sees them with a hyper energetic pop song with an uplifting message. While it seems like a simple one at first, the diverse Eurovision community can embrace it for its openness and determination. The great production upholds this gem, and the lighting on stage adds to it, especially in the end.

Poli definitely makes this song come to life with her vocals and her upbeat personality, making it shine even more! (And I did like her costume--not something for everyday-wear, but definitely one fitting the song and a bit avant--garde too). Compared to her first entry, which fights against those who put her down in a pop-rock way, she delivers with fun.

And they got their first qualification in nine years and a start to a nice run of entries as a result.

Personal ranking: 5th/42 Actual ranking: 4th/42 GF in Stockholm

#157: Athena -- For Real (Turkey 2004)

“All I know is you don’t want to be part of the crowd Realise yourself You say it but don’t feel it, what you sayin’ has no meanin’ Don’t hide your soul”

For their host entry, Turkey brings upon Athena, a ska-punk (and former metalcore) band with this bouncy song. And it’s such a great one—filled with energy and fun. A bit different from what we expect from Turkey, but it shows what their music industry could bring.

It's lively and fun, with Gokhan leading the charge with his presence. At times, he shouts more than he sings and it seems like he didn't dress up for a more formal event. That said, there's still a lot of charm in "For Real's" performance, ranging from the sharks in the background to the "Hi mom!" and the peace jacket. It comes along in an eccentric package, and makes for a solid predecessor to their rock-based entries four years later.

And it definitely hints at being oneself, which celebrates individuality in a fun way.

(Plus, that's the reason why my top three in 2004 isn't the actual top three. Haha)

Personal ranking: 3rd/36 Actual ranking: 4th/24 in Istanbul

#156: Katarína Hasprová - Modlitba (Slovakia 1998)

“Láska kráčam údolím sĺz A len ty môžeš zmierniť môj žiaľ Túžim sa dotknúť tvojich pier, tvojich rúk Prosím vráť sa mi, nevzdaj sa nás”

“Love, I am walking the valley of tears Only you can get me out of misery I long to touch your hands, your lips Please, come back, do not give up”

A comment on the interwebs suggested anybody who has Horehronie as their favorite Slovak entry has never listened to this. I could understand why people would gravitate towards the former, but this stands out more for me (and not just because of the religious title).

The introduction reminds me of “Kiss From a Rose”, which here, is less meant to be about plagiarism and more about the 1990s feel of it. Musically, it takes the same medieval elements from other 1990s entries, but it tells a different story, one about trying to fix a relationship on the rocks. It builds well, going from an otherwise delicate ballad to something more explosive when one gets into the chorus. The orchestration really helps it too!

Modlitba got six points from Croatia...and then nothing else. It's still a shame it did so poorly, but as a potential nul-pointer too? Sad.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 21st/25 in Birmingham

#155: Melovin -- Under the Ladder (Ukraine 2018)

“Nothing but your will sets you on fire Fire lasts forever...”

The song that inspired a fervor from Melovin’s fans, including me! While I’m not as enthusiastic as them, I still love this song—it's pulsating and intense, with quite interesting lyrics about getting up again(with some enunciation issues). There was a point where the song got a musical revamp, and I feared it would make the song worse, but fortunately it kept the whole thing intact with a few production changes.

Melovin proves he's a talented showman, and seeing the stairs go aflame made me smile (even though I preferred the effect more on his Vidbir performance; the flaming LEDs really helped there). Good thing the televote swooped in, because last place in the jury vote feels really wrong (though it could be because of said pronunciation).

Plus he has some good post-Eurovision songs—check them out! My favorite is З тобою, зі мною, і годі.

Personal ranking: 6th/43 Actual ranking: 17th/26 GF in Lisbon

#154: Joci Papai -- Origo (Hungary 2017)

“Be kell csuknod a szemed Úgy láthatsz meg engemet Hogy meghódítsd a szívem Ismerned kell lelkemet”

“You need to close your eyes So you can see me To conquer my heart You have to know my soul”

While Az en apam (#240) touches me more than Origo, one can’t deny this is the more creative song. It combines not only Romani influences, but also a dark pop foreground which allows them to shine.

In addition, the lyrics are absolutely masterful—they are rooted in Joci’s story and packs a punch in the message. It's tells of a relationship with someone who doesn't accept him for who he is (cursing her forever as a result), along with how Joci grew up and used music as a weapon for himself and his people. He's a compelling storyteller, and you can tell he sings it from the soul.

Combined with a compelling rap and a neat violin instrumental, you get a completely unique experience.

Personal ranking: 4th/42 Actual ranking: 8th/26 GF in Kyiv

#153: Blanche -- City Lights (Belgium 2017)

“All alone in the danger zone Are you ready to take my hand?”

Blanche had quite the journey in Eurovision--first her song gets released, and immediately becomes a contender. Then she has problems performing in shows and during rehearsals, at which the odds star dropping like flies. Then her semi-final performance was notably wobbly, but she still qualifies and places fourth.

Despite the staging errors (I would've personally have made the lighting gold rather than natural-colored), it was fully deserved and I think it was better than the eventual top three.

The vibe of this song reminds me of walking down the streets of Tokyo, because of the visuals involved. Everything is in a rush, but one's not sure There’s also tension, because of the dark electronic sound that dominates it. Despite Blanche’s nervousness on stage, it worked well with the song—it amplified the sensation of walking down a wire and wondering if the relationship will work. A startling entry from Belgium and one that really strikes at modernity.

Personal ranking: 3rd/42 Actual ranking: 4th/26 GF in Kyiv

#152: Frances Ruffelle -- We Will Be Free (Lonely Symphony) (United Kingdom 1994)

“Welcome to the land Where all our dreams are planned And fighting is a thing to do...”

The first of the UK’s attempts to modernize the contest in the 1990s, it’s a cool, funky song with interestingly-written lyrics. Someone compared the chorus to a protest slogan for social justice movement, but the rest of the song discusses a complex relationship. The opening lines are a highlight in particular, and everything flows fantastically.

A few bits of the live-performance went out of hand, like with the orchestration and Frances’ vocals, explained by how she was bopping up and down and was told that she needed to keep that down. As a result, she couldn't focus on her vocals and they turned out a bit sharp at times.

That said, she had a pretty dress and charming look about her. And while it placed in the top ten, I think it should've done better.

Personal ranking: 4th/25 Actual ranking: 10th/25 in Dublin

#151: Sebalter -- Hunter of Stars (Switzerland 2014)

"I state my heart has been well trained I’m gonna be your candidate I am the hunter and you are the prey Tonight I’m gonna eat you up"

This word-salad of a song makes it quite hard to choose a good lyric, as it has a bunch of nice lines but almost no meaning to them. Reading them again, it seems like one is trying to get his affections to like him, to no avail, unfortunately.

But beyond that, we get a fun and wholesome song, which features a prominent banjo and even a violin solo! From the opening melody I can't help but smile, or even whistle along at points (everytime the latter synchronizes, I feel a bit of accomplishment). It's a bit more folksy than what the contest oriented on the time (slickly produced pop with a bit of dubstep), which makes it even more special.

Finally, we have Sebalter himself, who really carries his own song! Not only is he quite good-looking, but also very charismatic and knows how to have a good time. While Swiss entries have become better known since then, you can't replicate Hunter of Stars; it's too special!

Personal ranking: 5th/37 Actual ranking: 13th/26 GF in Copenhagen

[chaotic-catra]

I wrote my reaction to Evermore when I heard it for the first time a week ago and I don't know what to do with it so here it is:)

Long story short: beautiful song, loved the references to Wonderland (And I fell from the pedestal right down the rabbit hole / We took a wrong turn and we fell down a rabbit hole) and Look What You Made Me Do (Missing me at the golden gates they once held the keys to / I don't like your kingdom keys they once belonged to me). I love how the melody is simple and how it’s not a “raising from the bottom” kind of song. That’s literally the best way to say it: long story short. She doesn’t care about the details, about who did what, because her mind is set elsewhere.

Marjorie: 30 seconds in and I just can't shut up about how taylor's voice was MADE for this kind of music, it is so soft and smooth like an asmr. It feels like it flows through the song. I love that the lyrics are really straight forward. Beautiful beautiful beautiful song just like Soon you'll get better. I like how it takes you a couple of minutes to understand where the song is going to.

Evermore: It gives me the feeling that Evermore and Long story short are two sides of the same coin, they talk about (almost) the same moment in time but one from a happy and hopeful perspective and the other one is still not so over all those dark moments. Evermore would happen a bit before LSS, it’s about this point in which you look back and you can't understand how thing went the way they went, what was the moment when things started to fall apart. And you are not in the eye of the storm anymore, but you are still not very far from it either. Is like everything that happened drowned and now you are alone with no energy and no direction and no perspective. “I'm on waves, out being tosed” Is like a transition song, it starts right after hitting rock bottom and follows her "recovery" until she finds something to hold on to: “In the cracks of light I dreamed of you. It was real enough to get me through.”

Happiness: CATRADORA. NOTHING LEFT TO SAY. CATRADORA. happiness is.. a lot. I love it.. It’s one of those songs that make u say wow.. she really captured this feeling incredibly. She said all there is to say, and showed all there was to show. It's like a flash of sanity in a turbulent time of transition.

Dorothea: CATRADORA CATRADORA CATRADORA also The Lumineers vibes. Dorothea sounds like a song to a friend who left for college or something like that, looking for better things because when living in a small town they tried their best to have a good time but they always knew they would never be 100% happy there and that’s the only reason why you don’t get mad at them or ask them to stay. aka She Ra if Catra wasn't left alone on a toxic and dangerous place when Adora left. It also sounds like “Sedona” by Houndmouth.

No body no crime: I didn't like this one much when I heard it for the first time but checking the lyrics is just one of those songs that make u go "this girl has such a talent when it comes to story telling". Her voice is so hypnotic, one of my favourite things about both folklore and evermore is how deep, calm, soft and SOLID her voice sounds. It was made for this kind of music. Also I love how she said “I sent this to my friend who is most likely to commit murder” SJDSDSJSJSK.

Coney island: I wish it didn’t remind me of certain things and I wish I didn’t understand certain lyrics but in the other hand, STRONG CATRADORA SONG from Adora’s pov. Adora feeling guilty for hurting Catra when she left and for making her feel like she didn’t matter to her. Realizing that no matter how many other wonderful people she meets, she’d never have a bond like the one she shared with Catra. I’ll elaborate on this:

Break my soul in two looking for you but you're right here (Adora looking for someone like Catra on every new person she meets but realizing that there’s no point because SHE ALREADY HAD A CATRA) /If I can't relate to you anymore then who am I related to? (Catra being the only family she had for most part of her life) /And I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island wondering where did my baby go? The fast times, the bright lights, the merry go (The whole She-Ra thing happened way too fast, and she was introduced to tons of people who admired and revered because they only saw the legendary warrior in her, but when things calmed down she felt Catra’s absence) /The question pounds my head "What's a lifetime of achievement?" If I pushed you to the edge (feeling guilty for, partly, being the reason why Catra made so many bad decisions  by becoming she ra) /Were you waiting at our old spot in the tree line by the gold clock? Did I leave you hanging every single day? (Catra waiting for Adora to come back to the horde) /And when I got into the accident the sight that flashed before me was your face (literally the vision she has at the heart of etheria) I could make a whole gifset out of this but I don’t know how to download the episodes

‘tis the damn season: I first said that Dorothea was about someone (X) talking to their friend who leaves their town. Listening to this I’m 100% sure that that person is Dorothea. (EDIT: I made a post with some parallels). And from this POV, you can tell that Dorothea wasn’t totally happy with her choice. She misses home, misses “X”, and recognizes not only that even if she left her town, she can’t escape from it, but also that she didn’t found what she was looking for in LA. There's an ache in you (Dorothea leaving) put there by the ache in me (Dorothea needing to leave bc she wasn’t there). Also, in “Dorothea” it doesn’t sound like “X” is sad about D leaving, but in this song she says that X is lying, and that X actually suffers because of it.

Willow: It's a really nice song, is catchy, chill, it's not gonna happen but it could have a really cool remix (EDIT: SOMEONE REALLY MADE A REMIX AND IT'S AMAZING). I don’t resonate much with the lyrics but the phrase “The more that you say the less I know, wherever you stray I follow, I'm begging for you to take my hand; wreck my plans” is just. so. beautiful. Yes, I’m avoiding the m*n part. Sorry Joe, ily.

Ivy: I didn't resonate much with this song so my brain stopped paying attention and instead it realized that the "How’s one to know?" part sounds EXACTLY like that Rose and Rosie song that they made to promote their sponsor that goes SUUUU-UUUURF SHARK. Biggest discovery at the moment if you ask me.

Gold rush: I don't have anything mature to say about this one. My leo ass wants someone singing things like this about me, that's it. sorry. About the music it sounds AMAZING I like the "magical" sound and the fairy tale atmosphere. I love the rhythm.

Cowboy like me: I can relate it to my own experiences but I don't thing they have much to do with the actual point of the song. Maybe I got this one wrong but I love this concept of "I wouldn't like to love someone like me, and you and me are made of the same". Champagne problems: First thought CATRADORA VIBES (Adora leaving Catra behind) “I dropped your hand while dancing, left you out there standing, crestfallen on the landing”. (EDIT: Now that I’ve listened to the album more times I like this one way more and the bridge is BIBLICAL) Closure: The “metal” noises reminds me of the American Horror Story’s theme song.

[putschki1969]

Please support Wakana!

The release of Wakana’s first solo live is right around the corner so I thought I would use the opportunity to remind my fellow fans to please support Wakana by purchasing the Blu-Ray.

Regular Edition on CDJapan ~ ￥ 5800 (no tokuten)     Regular Edition on Amazon Japan ~ ￥ 4,703 (great deal | no tokuten)

You will need NO proxy service to order on the above mentioned sites. Both CDJapan as well as Amazon Japan ship their stuff internationally (with a few exceptions). CDJapan offers a wide range of shipping methods whereas Amazon Japan has a default setting for overseas shipping (which is quite pricey but SUPER fast!). Please note that purchases on these sites will not be calculated into the daily and weekly sales data for the Oricon music charts. However, that doesn’t mean that you won’t still be supporting Wakana. If you are intent on gettig Wakana on a high spot in the charts you can always opt to purchase via proxy service. Just use Buyee or any other proxy service to buy your copy on a site like Gamers (where you will even receive a lovely tokuten).

This release is definitely worth getting if you love Wakana. The live was solid and a lot of fun (here you can find Part 1 and Part 2 of my live report). Judging from the trailer it looks like they didn’t over-edit Wakana’s performance, it sounds just like I remember it (I think they might have lowered the volume of the musicians though - which is good!).

I know there are many of you out there who say that “they love Wakana and they wanna support her” but they are “not willing to give any money to Space Craft”. People, please, THINK! Of course a majority of the profits will go to Space Craft but that money will in turn be used to push Wakana’s career ahead. If you refuse to give money to Space Craft you literally condemn Wakana to failure. Lots of fans are still waiting for Wakana’s contract to end, hoping that eventually Wakana will leave Space Craft and once she is “free of them”, they will start supporting her again. Do you not understand that no one is forcing Wakana to stay with Space Craft? Why would Wakana’s terms of contract be so much different than Keiko’s or Hikaru’s or Kaori’s? If she had wanted to leave she certainly could have by now. Wakana obviously CHOOSES to stay with them. She is still very insecure as a solo artist so she probably feels like she needs that anchor of familiarity. And let’s not forget that staying with Space Craft made it so much easier for Wakana to seamlessly transition to a more or less established solo artist with proper PR (the “proper” being disputable but you know what I mean), regular releases and live performances. Something that’s not as easily attainable if you are on your own (as seen with Hikaru). The fact that she can still sing Kalafina songs is also a nice bonus. (I highly doubt Hikaru will be able to sing any Kalafina songs during her live in December.) Anyways, while we don’t know all the details I completely understand Wakana’s choice. I am sure it wasn’t an easy choice and a lot of thought went into it. After all it led to some fucked up sort of public ostracising. For me it’s difficult to see all these pictures of Keiko and Hikaru having fun together and everyone acting like Wakana doesn’t exist. But that’s just how it is, that’s the price you pay. I am not sure if there are contractual obligations that keep them from interacting with each other publicly or if it’s just some sort of unspoken rule that everyone abides by to keep the “harmony” intact but those things are not unheard of in the Japanese entertainment industry. In fact, it’s a very common thing.

Keep in mind though that this is all for the public eye. That doesn’t mean that they actually had a “falling out” as so many tabloid articles and drama-hungry fans like to suggest. I simply see no reason why something like that would destroy the bond they share. All of them have been in the industry long enough to know what they were getting into. They are not naive, they know what it takes and I am sure they respect each other’s choices. And that’s not me being delusional or in denial, that’s just me being realistic.

Okay, this kinda turned into a rant which really wasn’t my intention. Back to the main topic. If you have some money to spare please buy Wakana’s blu-ray and don’t just wait for a download link. Wakana is working hard and deserves our support.

On a side note, I recommend all of you to join Wakana’s Official Fan Club Botanical Land! The annual fee is more than affordable and it's possible to pay with a foreign credit card. All you need is a Japanese address which can be easily attained via proxy services like TENSO.

[mst3kproject]

1009: Hamlet, Prinz von Dänemark

I spent a buck-fifty Canadian to download this movie. There’s not much you can get for a buck-fifty Canadian.  One sour soother, maybe, or a chipped coffee mug from a garage sale that has a photo of somebody else’s grandparents on it.  So now you know how much Hamlet is worth.

We all know the story of Hamlet, whether we wanted to or not. King Hamlet of Denmark was murdered by his brother Claudius, who then married Queen Gertrude and stole the throne.  We can’t be having that, so the king’s ghost appears to his son, Hamlet Jr, and tells him he must take revenge.  Junior then spends the whole rest of the play wandering around pondering the afterlife and battering his girlfriend Ophelia before finally running Claudius through during a climactic duel during which pretty much everybody else dies, too, except for the ones who were already dead.  Nobody has ever given me a convincing explanation of why these people have names like Horatio and Laertes instead of Svend and Rolf.

I’m definitely not going to try to review Hamlet itself, Shakespeare’s play, because I don’t know a damned thing about Hamlet.  I deliberately went out and murdered those brain cells with alcohol immediately after writing my final exam.  Instead I’m going to have to talk about this movie in itself, how it fares both as a film and as a retelling of this story.

That second point is a big one.  Hamlet has been done, a lot, and as the bots point out with their sketch about their all-percussion version, it’s really hard to do anything unique with it anymore.  If you’re an acting troupe who wants to give it a try, that’s cool because it means people will get to see live theatre, but if you’re making a movie you really need to bring something new to the table.  An interesting interpretation, an actor or director that people really want to see, an unusual setting or time period, something like that.  This Hamlet has none of that.

I am reasonably sure that what the movie is trying to do is to look like a stage play, much as The Magic Voyage of Sinbad was trying to look like an opera.  Sinbad pulled it off with extravagant sets and operatic bombast.  By contrast everything in Hamlet, from pillars to thrones to flights of stairs, looks like it’s made out of concrete.  There is very little music, which somehow makes the whole thing feel even more doom-and-gloom-y than Hamlet already does.  The costumes go for a semi-fantasy look somewhere between Elizabethan and medieval, which is very stagey, and the effect is heightened by the fact that most of the characters never seem to change their clothes. The actors don’t look comfortable in them, though, which means they look uncomfortable in their characters as well. Queen Gertrude in particular looks like she’s too worried about damaging her gown to move easily in it, and the giant chain around Claudius’ neck is absurd.

Adding to the impression that the movie was shot in somebody’s basement, it’s lit very pootly when it’s lit at all.  A lot of shots are quite dull, lit in a way that shows where things are but doesn’t create mood or drama.  The film is in black and white and the characters wear black, or at least colours so dark you can’t tell the difference, which leaves night shots (such as the one where Horatio and the guards are chasing after the king’s ghost) looking like a bunch of heads floating around.

It is, of course, very difficult to judge a dubbed performance. The actors we’re watching appear to be going for a sort of heightened melodrama, part of the idea that we’re meant to feel like we’re watching a stage play.  The dub actors, on the other hand, don’t seem to have gotten the memo.  A lot of them mumble, particularly Maximilian Schell as Hamlet, which is really weird because he’s dubbing himself.  Sometimes they manage to make the Shakespearean English sound very natural, but that often jars with the physical performances.  I have no idea what sort of accents some of them think they’re doing. There are a few who don’t seem to be trying to do an accent at all, while others sound like they’re aiming for British (because it’s Shakespeare?), German (because the movie’s German?) or Damn Worwelf.

Most of the actors are kind of bland-looking, and those who stand out do so because they look weirdly wrong for the parts they’re playing.  Polonius with his little mustache looks like a physics teacher who feels naked because he’s not wearing a necktie.  He’s also dubbed by John Banner, so if you keep hearing this is so klandinkto! every time he speaks… that’s why.  If Hamlet himself looks familiar, it may be because Maximilian Schell was Dr. Reinhardt in The Black Hole, or maybe it’s because he looks a lot like the guy in Atlantic Rim that I referred to as MacGuyver. He’s a very fine actor who won an academy award for Judgment at Nuremburg, but he’s way out of place as Hamlet.  His Hollywood good looks and crooked little smile make it feel like he’s trying to play Hamlet as a dashing heartthrob.

For all that, there are a couple of moments in this movie that I quite like.  The scene in which Hamlet is nodding and smiling to the wedding guests while the Too Too Solid Flesh soliloquy begins in voiceover is quite nicely done.  It gives you a very visceral sense of this man who is forced to bottle up his anger and grief.  I also like that during the Murder of Gonzago scene, the camera focuses not on the players but on the audience reaction.  Claudius and Gertrude smile at each other when the players talk about love, and then grow uncomfortable as the play condemns re-marriage.  Ophelia’s embroidery is an attempt at symbolism, the arum being a popular funeral flower.  Too bad it’s so in-your-face that it loses all subtlety.

On the whole, though, Hamlet is just dull.  The spartan, ugly sets and dark costumes offer us very little to look at, and in some of the darker scenes there’s almost nothing to see at all. The physical and dub performances don’t match, and neither hold the attention.  Watching it feels like a two-hour slog through a tarry morass of depression.

I kind of wonder what the purpose of this movie was supposed to be. It was made for TV in the sixties, and I guess it was an attempt to capitalize on the Germans’ love of Shakespeare – because Germans do definitely love Shakespeare, sometimes considering themselves to have a better claim on him than England because unlike the English, they respect him.  More Shakespeare plays are performed in Germany every year than in England, and in the leadup to World War II the Nazi regime tried to get rid of him, couldn’t, and had to settle for picking and choosing which translations were ‘German enough’ for them (this always reminds me of the joke about Hamlet being better in the original Klingon).

If this is the case, I would like to know what the Germans who saw this movie in its original broadcast thought of it.  Sixty-year-old reviews of made-for-tv movies in foreign languages are hard to find even online, so I honestly have no idea.  I know that people who have seen this English version hate it, and I have a hard time imagining it being much better in German even when you love Shakespeare unconditionally.  The fact that the Germans do love Shakespeare just makes it seem that much more likely that they’d consider this dreary pork-filled version an insult to him.

It’s also interesting to think about what made the Best Brains pick this one out as an MST3K project.  The movie is definitely bad, and in its own way it fits right in with a lot of the black-and-white crap from the Joel era that tries so hard to be important and just ends up being depressing.  Yet the source material remains as something a lot of people would consider untouchable (the Germans being high on that list… although Shakespeare himself, purveyor of fine penis jokes to Her Majesty the Queen since 1591, would probably be totally okay with the MST3K treatment.  He must have heard way more vicious audience commentary).  My guess it was something they considered a challenge to themselves, in the same way as RiffTrax tackled Casablanca just to see if they could do it.  The Amazing Colossal Transplanted Sci-Fi Channel Episode Guide entry on the episode is kind of interesting, as Kevin mentions the feeling that they had to be funnier than usual in order to live up to the play’s legend.

My high school English teachers (the same ones who inflicted The Most Dangerous Game on me) insisted that Hamlet is a play which should make you think.  I’m pretty sure this is not what they meant, but the thing I’ve always found myself thinking about while watching or reading it is the idea of marrying one’s brother’s widow.  The church of the time said that this was equivalent to marrying one’s own sister (Claudius indeed calls Gertrude our sometime sister) and frowned upon it most heavily, and this would have been common knowledge in Elizabethan England because it was Henry VIII’s excuse for divorcing Catherine of Aragon and marrying Anne Boleyn, Queen Elizabeth’s mother (never mind that he’d also fucked Anne’s sister Mary).  By portraying this as villainous behaviour, Shakespeare was sucking up to the Queen, emphasizing that her mom’s marriage was way more legit than Catherine’s.  Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[duhragonball]

[FIC] Luffa: The Legendary Super Saiyan (88/?)

Disclaimer: This story features characters and concepts based on Dragon Ball, which is a trademark of Bird Studio/Shueisha and Toei Animation.   This is an unauthorized work, and no profit is being made on this work by me. This story is copyright of me. Download if you like, but please don’t archive it without my permission. Don’t be shy.

Continuity Note: About 1000 years before the events of Dragon Ball Z.

Previous chapters conveniently available here.

[25 May, 234 Before Age.  Interstellar Space.]

There was a killer on Planet Saiya, a cold-blooded murderer who hunted Saiyans with a lethal, fast-acting poison.   Zatte had taken her wife's star-yacht, the Emerald Eye in search of a way to stop this assassin once and for all.    

Like all Dorluns, Zatte was a survivalist, and so she took every possible precaution for her journey.    In particular, there was the possibility that the killer might learn of her investigation and sneak aboard the ship to kill her before she could uncover the the truth.   In fact, Zatte somewhat hoped this would happen, as her entire investigation had been bait for a trap.    She had learned that the killer's poison was derived from proteins found in Dorlun blood.    As a Dorlun herself, Zatte would be naturally immune to its effects, which gave her an edge against the killer in the event of a confrontation.   The killer was almost certainly Dorlun as well, and while Zatte couldn't be certain what other tricks he might have up his sleeve, she was certain that she could overpower him physically.    She was married to the Super Saiyan after all, and years of training with Luffa had made Zatte into quite possibly the strongest Dorlun alive.  

So if the killer had stowed away on the ship, Zatte would be pleased, but that didn't mean she would make it easy for him.   One hour after leaving the Saiya system, Zatte sealed off the bridge from the rest of the ship, and ordered the ship's computer to run continuous scans for life signs on all decks.    An hour later, she programmed the computer to depressurize various sections of the ship, while flooding others with pure nitrogen gas.  

Every Dorlun was born with a unique ability.   Zatte could manipulate energy, which she generally used for the purpose of camouflaging herself.   Bending light waves around her body would make her invisible to the naked eye, as well as devices that relied on electromagnetic radiation.    She could also do something similar with her own life energy, enabling her to use her ki without being detected by ki sensitive adepts.   Not even Luffa's sharp ki senses could overcome this ability, although Luffa's keen sense of smell was much harder to fool.   Theoretically, Zatte could hide herself aboard a starship for several days without being noticed by anyone, but she still needed air, water, and food.    Another Dorlun might use different abilities to hide, but the same basic necessities would have to be addressed.   Zatte hoped that by controlling the life support system, she could seize the initiative.   If there was a stowaway on board, he would need air, and he would have to go to the parts of the ship where Zatte wanted him to go.  

If he made it onto the bridge unseen and unheard, he would still have to breathe, and the ship's computer could measure the oxygen consumption in the room.   Zatte had programmed it to alert her if the oxygen usage increased enough to indicate the presence of a second life form, no matter how small.    Periodically, she walked around the deck, firing a plasma pistol set to produce a wide-dispersal stun ray.   She would shoot at every surface on the deck, just in case her enemy might have some way to get around her other safeguards.  

"Be careful," she chuckled as she finished her latest sweep with the pistol.    Those had been Luffa's last words to her before she departed Planet Saiya.   It was sweet of her wife to show such concern, but it was a silly thing to ask of a Dorlun.  It was another reminder that they were truly alien to one another.  Their marriage hadn't always gone well, but considering the cultural gap between them, it was probably impressive that they'd made things work for as long as they had.  

She sat down in the captain's chair and ordered the computer to resume a playlist of music she had arranged for the trip.   "Deep thule" had once been her preferred genre of music, but over the years she had acquired an appreciation for wave dyspro.   It wasn't exactly toe-tapping fare, but she found the Dysprosium-style bands were good for background music while she read.    She wasn't sure how that worked for concerts.   Maybe their fans just stayed in their seats and read books during the show.  

As she chewed on a ration bar, she glanced up at the main viewer occasionally.   It was set to display a continuous readout on the sensor sweeps and life sign readings she had requested.   In one hour, she would fire her pistol on the bridge again.   Until then she hoped that she could knock out two more chapters of the novel she was reading.  

She was not alone.

*******

[25 May, 234 Before Age.  Planet Pflaume.]

Pflaume was an ice giant, a planet much larger than Saiya, or the other terrestrial worlds where humanoids typically lived.   The only solid portion was at its core.  Above this was a dense, superfluid mantle composed of ammonia, methane, and water.  Above this lay a thick atmosphere of mostly hydrogen and helium, with clouds of hydrogen sulfide and ammonia.   To cope with this hostile environment, Pflaume City was constructed to remain aloft in the toxic atmosphere.   It was more like a space station than a planetary settlement, but its residents took pride in living in such an inhospitable place, even if they were completely sheltered from its hazards.  

Over the years, Pflaume City became an important port-of-call, and this economic importance eventually attracted the idle rich, who enjoyed the novelty of living in such a unique place.  The higher levels of the city were reserved for its most elite residents, and the most prized real estate on the station lay upon its uppermost level.   There, a great dome displayed a real-time image of the violet Pflaumian sky.  It was like standing on a terrestrial planet, only to be surrounded by a vast storm far grander than anyone could imagine.   There were municipal parks that allowed the public to enjoy the view, but to actually own property under the dome was ridiculously expensive.   To rent a modest apartment under the dome cost more than the price of some entire planets.

The King of the Saiyans, Rehval III, owned an entire private villa on the dome level.  He enjoyed showing it off to anyone he met.    

Luffa was not impressed.

"You found the doorway," he said pleasantly.   "I had a feeling you would."

Behind Luffa was a glowing magic portal about the size and shape of a door.   Though she had only taken a single step to pass through it, she had somehow traveled trillions of miles from an underground facility on Planet Saiya.  She glanced back and noticed that the passage had begun to shrink and fade away, but this didn't concern her, since she wouldn't need to go back anytime soon.  

"You've got a lot of explaining to do," Luffa said.  

"Of course," Rehval said.   The king was sitting on a stone bench, sipping tea from an expensive looking cup.   As always he wore clothes of a particular shade of blue, which symbolized the royal line that had ruled the Saiyans for three generations.  Usually, he dressed in a suit that resembled the sort of formal attire worn by alien diplomats and heads of state.   Today, he looked more like some sort of monk.   His tunic and pants were of a very simple, functional design, and he wore no shoes at all.

Standing behind the bench was a woman with rose-colored skin, although the hood of her blue silken robes obscured her face.   Luffa thought she noticed some blue hair peeking out of the hood when the woman leaned forward to refill his cup.  The tea was steaming hot, and yet she cradled the teapot with her bare hands without any sign of discomfort.  

"I know you're excited to see Luffa in person, my dear," Rehval said, looking back to his companion, "but she and I have much to discuss first."

"We had an appointment this morning," Luffa said, struggling to contain her rage.  "We were going to catch the Saiyan-killer today, remember?"

He let out an amused snort.  "An appointment," he said.   "I was hoping you'd call it a date.   We're all alone out here, Luffa.   You don't have to feel self-conscious about it."

"Knock that crap off," Luffa said.  "You've been playing me from the start!"  

"Like a fiddle," he admitted.   "But some instruments just can't be tuned, no matter how gifted the musician is.    Still, it was fun to try."

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Luffa demanded.  

"I'm talking about power, Luffa.   Like most Saiyans, you equate power with physical strength.    You think yourself to be the most powerful Saiyan because you're the strongest one, and your strength does make you powerful, but your power lacks scope.   Strength is only one dimension of power.    A man might be too weak to swim against the current of a mighty river, but if he swims at an angle, he can still manage to cross to the other side.  And if he builds a water wheel along its banks to harness the river's power for his own ends?   If he uses that power to build machines and uses them to change the very course of the river to suit his ends, is the man still weak?   Is the river still mighty?"

"Is this going to be about how smart you are?" Luffa asked.  "Because I get this kind of speech all the time.   'You may be strong, Super Saiyan, but my devious plan will blah blah blah' and maybe a death ray or something, and then I break every bone in their hands.   If a man drowns in a river, no one cares how clever he was.    If they think about him at all, they just call him "That Idiot Who Screwed Around With a River When He Should Have Known Better."  

Rehval laughed.  "You're right, I apologize," he said.  "You've fought so many battles in your time, and all of your enemies probably felt very confident that they had an answer to your superior force.    It must sound very cliche.   I'll try to be more original."

Luffa shook her wrist, gesturing for him to get on with it.  

"What I'm saying is that it's not just about being smart, or just being strong.   It's about having options, so you can adapt to any situation.    That's what my grandfather believed when he assumed the throne all those years ago.   There were a lot of naysayers back then.   Anti-monarchists-- like you and your mother-- who rejected the very idea of a Saiyan King. Saiyans who thought that the throne should be awarded in ritual combat.    Saiyans who thought kings were only relevant in wartime.   Rehval the First sought to change all that.   He forged the Saiyan people into something resembling a real nation."  

"And then he handed it off to his bastard son," Luffa said with a sneer.   "Typical nepotism.   You fools get a little bit of authority, and then you think it runs in the family."

"You're absolutely right," Rehval said.  "My father didn't deserve the throne, but you shouldn't judge him too harshly.   As a king, he carried on my grandfather's work, and he maintained order, more or less.  He was more of a steward than a king, really.  He was just keeping the throne warm for my brother."

"Your brother?" Luffa asked.   For a moment, she was about to point out that he was an only child, but then she remembered the way she had learned this.   In an effort to win her trust, Rehval had invited her to sift through his thoughts with her telepathic powers, and she had blithely assumed that any information she found would be genuine.  Somehow, though, he had managed to lie to her in spite of this.   Even now, when she knew that he had thwarted her mental abilities, it was still difficult to accept that she had been fed disinformation.  

"My grandfather insisted that his line use a standard order of succession," Rehval said.  "The oldest living male offspring becomes the next king.   He was very high on bringing rule of law to the Saiyan race.  No contests for leadership, no civil wars or usurpers.   It worked well for so many alien governments, so why not us?   That was why he made sure his grandchildren were educated off-planet.   We went to some of the finest schools in the galaxy.   What did your parents do for your schooling, Luffa?   I'm guessing it was some run-of-the-mill computer software.    I can promise you, you didn't miss anything.  Two plus two is four no matter how much you pay someone to tell you that.    The history of the Camelian Empire is the same no matter how far you travel.   It's the little things that matter with education.   The moments no one plans for, or the insights and opportunities that can't be written on a syllabus."

"And that's how you learned to resist mind-readers?" Luffa asked.

"You're getting ahead of me," Rehval said.   "I studied alien histories because my father and grandfather thought they were important.   My older brother was supposed to become king, not me.   That was the rule of law.    Even if I could have challenged him for the throne, I'd lose, because he was so much stronger.   I was just the backup plan, in case he died unexpectedly.  And that got me wondering about why he was born stronger.   Why is one Saiyan naturally weaker than another?   Why are some Saiyans born with great strength, while others have to work to achieve it?   I trained very hard, Luffa, but my power never increased much at all, and I never came close to rivaling my brother."

"Maybe you should have tried harder," Luffa scoffed.  "Instead of looking for excuses in the back of some textbook."

"I did both," Rehval said.  "But the textbook was where I found the answer.   We Saiyans have had a poor understanding of genetics.  We think a child should be strong simply because its parents were strong, but it's much more complicated than that.    Your parents were never Super Saiyans, yet here you are.    My parents were strong, but my brother and I didn't inherit equal shares of that potential.  Do you know why that is?"

"Who cares?" Luffa asked.  "My father tried to game that system, Rehval.   Remember him?   He thought he could take my suffering and use it to increase his own strength."

"No, you don't understand," Rehval said.  "I wasn't looking to steal someone else's abilities like your father.   I wanted to bypass the game entirely.    Fate made me the younger brother.   Genetics left me at a disadvantage.   Political theory wouldn't save me.   If I usurped the throne, I would only be setting a precedent for others to usurp it from me.   I needed options, so I found some.  A classmate of mine told tales of magic-users who occasionally wandered through his home sector.    Most of the students didn't listen to him, but I did.  I asked him to tell me more.   And from there..."

"You studied alchemy," Luffa said.  "You told me it was your father's lab, that he was the one who spent all his free time trying to tinker with nature, but it was you all along, wasn't it?"

Rehval nodded.  "I considered enrolling in the academy on Planet Gwarthos, but their record-keeping system is too meticulous, and I didn't want there to be any transcript of what I'd learned.   Instead, I went to a remote asteroid and learned at the feet of an adept believed to have been dead for decades.   My father and brother thought I was studying Camelian art theory, but when I returned to Planet Saiya, I brought with me the means to secure the throne for myself."   He held up his hand and pretended to squeeze an imaginary eyedropper.   "The next semester, I dosed my brother's food slowly, just enough to make him sick, but not enough to arouse suspicion.   He and I were the only two Saiyans at that private school.   It wasn't hard for me to switch places with him, and while I assumed his identity there, I worked on my plan to complete my disguise.  Within a year, the true Rehval III was dead, and I, the pseudo-Rehval, took his name and his birthright."

"Then what's your real name?" Luffa asked.  

"It doesn't matter," Rehval said.  "Over the next few years, I learned to construct talismans that would bend others to my will.  Eventually, I was able to drop my disguise entirely, and my father and anyone else who mattered believed that I had been the true Rehval III all along.  The name my mother gave me became meaningless.   The true power of alchemy lies in mystery, Luffa.   When the great masters record their secrets, they use the names of other, more prominent figures to make their works seem more important.   I have done the same."

"You're a disgrace!" Luffa snarled.   "Where's your Saiyan pride?!"

"I swallowed it," Rehval said.   "My birthname was a small price to pay for the chance to shape the future of our people.   That was how I bypassed the system, Luffa.   Your father tried to game the system, but I changed the rules.   Did I ever tell you why I like elevators?   I remember we talked about it one night, but I don't think I got around to explaining that."

"What does that have to do with--?!" Luffa began to protest.

"On most planets," Rehval went on, "the ones with cities and tall buildings, the ground floor would be the most expensive to rent.   Rich people wouldn't want to take the stairs, and landlords would exploit that to their advantage, charging higher rent for lower floors.   So a ground floor apartment would be seen as a sign of luxury and status, while the higher floors were left to the rabble.  It doesn't make a lot of sense to people like us who can fly, I know, but take my word for it, it holds true on every planet with stairs.   "But in every intelligent society, once the elevator is introduced, aha!"  He snapped his fingers for effect, and Luffa winced with irritation.   "Now, it's easy to move up and down a tall building.   Overnight, the paradigm shifts.   Now the rich demand to live on the top floors, where they can enjoy the view, or the satisfaction of being higher up than everyone else.   Suddenly, what was once despised becomes important.   That's the power of elevators, Luffa.  That's the kind of power I crave.    Not to make the rules, or to break them, but to redefine what rules are."

"You gave up your birthname so you could pretend to be the guy who invented elevators?" Luffa asked.    It was a gross oversimplification of what he had said, but she couldn't resist the taunt.  

"The Saiyan race had no future before my grandfather took control," Rehval said.   "I learned that while I studied the history of other cultures.   We Saiyans have no such history.    Just a collection of superstitious folk tales passed down from mother to daughter.   Everything else was lost and forgotten."

"Because those superstitious folk tales are all that really matter!" Luffa insisted.   "They're all we need to know who we are and how we should live!  But I guess your mother didn't get that message across!  You won't even use the name she gave you!"

"I never said the old stories don't matter," Rehval said.  "I'm saying that they're not all that matter.  We can have more, but only if we unite as one people under one king and take responsibility for ourselves!   It goes against our warrior nature, perhaps, but a strong ruler can force us all together.    A strong dynasty can maintain that unity for however long it takes to forge the Saiyan race into a true culture!"

"And your damned sorcery lets you improve on what your grand-daddy started, is that it?" Luffa said.   She turned her head and spit.  "I've met half-breeds with more conviction than you, 'Rehval'.   A true Saiyan doesn't look for shortcuts."

"Then I'm not a true Saiyan," Rehval said evenly.   "I'm willing to sacrifice my identity to ensure the future of our species!   It's a small price to pay.   Tell me, Luffa, what are you willing to do for the Saiyan race?   Lead by example?   You'll just fight a series of empty wars until you die of old age."

A devious grin spread over Luffa's face.   "That does sound like a pretty good life," she said.  

"It does, doesn't it?" Rehval said.  "I envy our ancestors, who could fight without a care in the world, but destiny has other plans for us, Luffa."

"That's what this is all about, isn't it?" she asked.   "There never was a Saiyan killer.   You arranged all those murders just so you could ask for my help.    This whole time, you were scouting me for your stupid 'destiny plan'."

He sipped his tea and smiled.    "You never cease to amaze me, Luffa.   I wove a very complex web of deceit, and you still manage to cut straight to the heart of the matter.    You're right, of course.  I do need you.   And since you haven't tried to kill me yet, I assume that you're willing to at least hear my proposal."

*******

[25 May 234 Before Age.  Interstellar Space.]

Stealing aboard the Emerald Eye was child's play.  Avoiding its various security systems was mildly challenging, but she had experience with these matters, and it was no great obstacle for her.  The loss of cabin pressure in certain parts of the ship was at most an inconvenience, but nothing she couldn't handle.   The sections of the ship pressurized with nitrogen but no oxygen, on the other hand...  Those were a different story: they didn't bother her at all.  

All in all, it was a disappointing defense, but Zatte was setting a trap, not a fortification.  It was only supposed to seem like a thorough defense, and so one had to admire the thoroughness of the ruse.  An unsuspecting intruder would have been completely fooled.  

The only hard part was entering the bridge without making any noise.   Fortunately, Zatte had solved that problem by playing music loud enough to drown out the pneumatic mechanism that opened the door from the lift.   One simply had to climb the lift shaft, cut power to the door, and open it manually, releasing the pressure on the pneumatics slowly enough to cut down on the noise.  

This allowed her onto the bridge, directly behind the captain's chair.   From there, it was just a matter of closing the door behind her, and waiting patiently for the right moment to strike.   When she was ready, she stealthily crept up behind Zatte's chair, drew her knife, and...

Suddenly Zatte leaped out of her seat and fired a pistol.  The beam was wide enough that it didn't hit her very hard, but it was enough to knock her off her feet.    And when Zatte looked directly at her, she realized that her power had been disrupted as well.

Very nice, she thought as she rolled to her feet.    

"What the hell are you?!"  Zatte demanded.  

The intruder smiled and pointed at herself.   "plibortuN vehasS, zattE," she said cordially.   "That's the special greeting, right?   That's how we prove to each other we're really Dorluns, isn't it?"

"Computer!" Zatte shouted.   "Identify intruder life readings!"

"No life readings detected," replied the ship's computer.

The woman laughed.   "I love this part," she said.    "Usually I kill the mark before they ever really get a handle on what they're dealing with, but you!  Oh, you'll take a while, so you've got plenty of time to work this out."

Zatte never took her eye off the intruder, and backed away slowly.   "Computer," she asked.   "Calculate oxygen consumption on the bridge.   Does the oxygen demand indicate the presence of a second life form?"

"Negative," the computer replied.    

"You're not breathing," Zatte said.  "That's how you managed to stow away on all those other ships before you got to Planet Saiya.  You don't put off any life signs because you're...."

"Bingo," the intruder cheered.   "You were pretty clever, figuring out the Dorlun connection, but then you got cocky, and assumed that your enemy would be just like a Dorlun.    And I am Dorlun, mostly, except for one teensy thing: I'm dead."

Zatte pointed at the woman's face.   "You don't look like any Dorlun corpse I've ever seen, lady," she said.   "Red skin, blue hair?  And you look exactly like me.   You've even got an eyepatch like mine, even though it's on the wrong eye."

"I know, right?" the intruder said.  She gestured to the eyepatch proudly.  "It's pretty awesome, but not a lot of people would get the reference.   Just you and your friends and your wife, I guess.   How is Luffa, by the way?"

"You leave her out of this," Zatte said.  

"Leave her out of it?" the intruder laughed.   "I was created because of her!   Do you think my master would have gone to all this trouble otherwise?    Do you know how long it takes to build a homunculus template?  To customize it?  To imprint it with superficial memories of the original?"

"Homunculus?" Zatte asked.  

"Right, I should probably explain that," the intruder said.   "I said I was 'dead', but that sort of implies that I used to be alive, and that isn't true.   You wouldn't call a rock 'dead', for instance.  'Nonliving' would be more appropriate, but I like the way 'dead' rolls off the tongue.   Makes me sound badass.   Do you think Luffa would like that?"

"Why did you kill all those Saiyans?" Zatte demanded.  

"Because they sucked!" the intruder replied.   She threw up her hands and laughed.    "Why does anyone do anything, Zatte?   I'm a Dorlun, only I'm not a Dorlun, you get it?  I'm not alive, so survival doesn't mean much to me.   Instead of keeping myself alive like some people in this room, I make sure other people end up dead.    You and me, we're like polar opposites, you get it?"

"Then why are you here?" Zatte asked.    "If you're telling me you aren't even alive, then why would you care if I exposed your identity?  You could have hidden on Planet Saiya for as long as you wanted!"

The intruder laughed.   "Oh, you really are clueless, aren't you?   I hope I don't sound that dumb when I talk.   See, you thought you were being so clever, trying to set a trap for me by investigating my murders.    And I was supposed to take the bait to keep you from finding out who I am.   Except I'm nobody, Zatte.  If you want to give me a name, you can call me Pozet.   That's what my master calls me, but it really makes no difference to me."

"Pozet?!" Zatte asked.  

"You like it?" she asked.  "In the Dorlun language, it means the opposite of your name."

"That's sick!" Zatte said.  

"Thanks," Pozet said.    "Anyway, like I was saying, you thought you were bait to trap me, but you had it backwards.   I was the bait to trap you.   And here we are.   Just you and me, and no Super Saiyans around to get in our way."   She reached for a second knife holstered to the leg of her pants and pointed it menacingly at Zatte.   "So... are you as excited about this as I am?"

Zatte's eye was wide with horror, and her mouth hung open in shock, so she had no reply to offer, but Pozet chose to take that as a "yes".

*******

[25 May 234 Before Age.  Planet Pflaume.]

"A homunculus," Rehval explained.   I knew very little about your wife, but I did learn that Zatte was hospitalized on Planet Extraliga for a time, and it wasn't difficult to hire someone to infiltrate the nursing staff and obtain hair and blood samples.   More than enough to imprint her characteristics upon an alchemical construct."

He gestured to the woman standing behind him, and she lifted her hood, revealing a face identical to Zatte's only with red skin and blue hair, rather than the blue skin and red hair typical of Dorluns.  

"I call her 'Pozet', he said.   She's not really alive, but she resembles Zatte closely enough to give me some insight into that aspect of your life.   I needed to understand you, Luffa.   Friend or foe, I needed to know as much as I could learn about how your mind works."

Luffa glared at the creature, who now smiled at her with mock affection.    "It even has her ability," she said dispassionately.   "I was trying to figure out how it could hold that teapot without burning its hands, but it's using energy manipulation.  Keeping the tea hot for you."

"I customized the formula to replicate important aspects of Zatte, while reversing certain others," Rehval said.   "The color swap was an aesthetic choice.   Your wife is a survivor, my Pozet exists only to take life away.   She's even taught me some Dorlun phrases."  

"Mostly pillow talk," Pozet said.  "If you'd like, I can teach you--"

Luffa raised her hand and fired an energy blast at Pozet's forehead.  It passed through her quite harmlessly, and destroyed a hill several dozen yards behind her.

"Ooh, spicy!" Pozet said.  

"I thought you would have realized by now, Luffa," Rehval said.   "The two of us aren't actually here.    You're speaking to a image being projected from elsewhere in the city."

"I'm well aware of your cowardice," Luffa said bitterly.   "I was just hoping your creature was really standing here, since you seem to consider it expendable."

"Not expendable," Rehval said as he patted Pozet's wrist.   "Renewable.  Since Pozet isn't truly alive, I can impart her essence onto as many homunculi as I can create.   Currently, I have three of them active right now.  This one stays here on Pflaume City to attend my villa while I'm away.   The second is still lurking around Planet Saiya, continuing to kill Saiyans until I give her the order to stop, and the third is on your ship, securing your wife for me."

"You manufactured this whole Saiyan-killer business, just to lure me here," Luffa said, and you're telling me it's still killing people?"

"Of course she's still killing people," Rehval said.   "You and I still haven't caught her yet.  It would arouse suspicion if the murders suddenly stopped without explanation.  My hope is that you and I come to terms, and then we go back and capture the killer together, and the public will celebrate our successful partnership."

Luffa threw back her head and made a low, angry groan.   "You've been deceiving me this entire time, and yet you actually think I'm going to help you lie to your own people?  I'll give you this much, Rehval, you may not have any Saiyan pride, but you make up for it in sheer gall."

"Thank you," he said.   "That actually means a lot to me, since bile is considered an important bodily humor in alchemical theory.  It gives me hope, Luffa, that despite all that's happened between us, we can still work together."

"Then you're deceiving yourself," Luffa said.  "I followed you here to kill you."

"Yes, I know," Rehval said.  "And that is why I withdrew to Pflaume City, Luffa.   On Saiya, there was always a chance you might destroy the planet and escape in your starship.  But now, your ship is far from here, so if you do anything reckless here, you risk rupturing the hull of this city."  

He pointed at the dome above them, which displayed the torrent of purple clouds raging around them from all sides.   "There's no oxygen out there, Luffa.   You might be strong enough to survive the winds, but the toxic gases would suffocate you, and even if you had a spacesuit, there would be nowhere for you to go."

She glanced up at the dome, and then back at him.   "Cute," she said.  "I don't sense any other life forms on the city, either.   You must have killed them-- No, you arranged for them to evacuate the place. That way, they'd take all their ships with them.   The only way out is that portal I stepped through, and I'm guessing you're the only one who can open it."

"That's right," Rehval said.   Pozet chuckled triumphantly while he leaned forward and steepled his fingers.   "The only way off this planet alive is through me, Luffa.  So you may as well take the time to hear what I have to say."

NEXT: Saiyan and Super Saiyan

[aabapk]

Download Google Fit Apk, the Best guide on how to use the Google Fit app and achieve your health goal also the best tips for the people who want to stay healthy.

What Is Google Fit?

Welcome to the age where people are more informed about health and fitness than they were ever before. Unluckily this is also the age where we are having the most health problems ever. A sedentary lifestyle, poor diet habits, and inactivity have caused a lot of problems. Technology on the other hand is ever-evolving and is trying to come up with solutions and insights to help us improve our health and lifestyle. Google is one of the leading companies that is coming up with new ways of improving people’s health. Google Fit is one of those huge steps. This app in summary is a tracker, It will keep a record of all your activity.

It will keep information of all the activities that you have done physically, that includes your steps, distance covered, cycling, jogging even sleep. So it is a complete package in one app. Before we had to download multiple apps for each of these things but now we get it at one spot. Every fitness-related option is in Fit. It is not just a tracker, it also has other amazing features that are going to boost your health goals.

7 Best Features of Google Fit:

Simplicity

Set Custom Health Goals

Tracking Multiple Activities

Calorie Counter

Playlists

Connect Third-Party Apps

Heart Points

Lets me explain these features briefly here.

1-The simplicity of the App:

I have to give it to Google for its simplicity. Like all other apps by Google, Fit is so simple to understand and use that even a first-timer will face no problem setting it up, using it on a daily basis, setting his health goals, and tracking his records. This app has such a nice simple and clean interface that you won’t face any trouble. It is not clogged with useless information like many other apps out there.

2-Customize your Health Goals:

Setting up health goals is always been the most wanted option in health and fitness-related apps. Google gives you this freedom, now you can set your heart points (will be discussed in a moment) , your pace etc. It gives you options to have a daily , weekly or monthly goal tracking.

3-Multiple activities:

Different activities have different impacts on our health goals. It was always a problem to track multiple activities and their benefits but Google Fit solves this issue. As we all know swimming has a different impact on your health goals and walking is a whole different activity. So when you set your goal you can simply decide the things that you will do and let Google do the tracking. It will tell you that how many heart points you gained while swimming or walking.

4-Keep an eye on your calories:

Whatever you are doing, you are burning calories. But how many, that is what we want to know. Fit is going to tell you that exactly. It will track your calories burnt during each activity. It even lets you know based on your weight/height measurements that how many calories you burn while at rest.

5-Amazing workout playlists:

Who likes boring workouts? not me, Google has gone a step beyond its competitors. It has spiced up the activities by giving you the choice to chose Top Trending workout playlists from YouTube. This makes things exciting, now hear your favorite music while working out.

6-Third-party apps can be connected to your Fit:

We will be discussing in detail which apps exactly can be connected to Google Fit but this is another feature that makes Google a great choice. You can connect to many of the other fitness apps out there with your App.

7-Heart Points:

Google Collaborate with American Heart Association (AHA) to come up with a metric “Heart points”. It is based on your “Move Minutes”. Move minutes are basically the movement that you have made, regardless of the activity. It could be the number of minutes you spent walking, running, doing yoga, or swimming. The time you spent doing any of these activities will be recorded as “Move Minutes.

Now, this is where Google stands out, it has basically taken this data to a next level. It made this movement record mean something for you. Heart points will show you your overall health, or strictly speaking overall heart health. Let’s say you are ready to go for a swift walk, Google is going to track that, now for low-intensity physical work. Google Fit is going to reward you with one point. So twenty minutes of walk is going to add twenty Heart Point to your profile. But If you are switching to a high-paced exercise, let’s say a long run. You will get Double Heart Points. So 20 Minutes of a long run is going to add 40 Heart Points to your arsenal.

You can set your weekly goal on the basis of your heart Points and keep a track record of your heart health based on that.

How does Google Fit Work:

Basically, This app uses your mobile phone sensors, and GPS tracker to track and count your movements. So if you walk around a park, the sensors and the GPS tracker will keep tracking your movements and in the end, it will show you the records. So yes, you will have to grant this app to access your location data.

Easy Steps to Set Up your Google Fit App

Download your app from Play Store or Download Apk file using this link.

Install the app on your phone.

3- Sign Up or Sign in using Google Account

4- Enter your details, i.e your gender information, your birthdate, your weight, etc

5- Google will then ask you to give permission to track your activities.

6- Allow Fit to track your activities if you want, or you can turn it off.

7 — The app will then ask you to allow it to track your location. You can either allow it to track you all the time or only when the app is open.

8- You will be prompted with a health information card regarding your activity goals.

9- Another card will show you how to score heart points

You are all set. This is how your home screen will look like.

How to set up your Activities for a better Health score?

This app appears to be simple which indeed it is, but it is loaded with solid features. It gives the uses a complete package and freedom. The setups are so simple that you can adjust things with only a few clicks. If you went jogging yesterday and you used Google Fit to track your activity, and today you have planned to play basketball with your kids, or you are going on a hike or cycling. Then? what should you do now? Well, don’t worry Fit has got your back whenever it comes to health and fitness. You can change your activity, or add a new activity with just a few taps. let me show you how.

There is this “PLUS” Icon in the bottom right corner. Tap on it and a menu will pop up, with some other rich features like adding your blood pressure or activity. You can click on the activity and add your custom activity to it. Don’t worry all other calculations will be done by the app itself.

This is one way of doing it. You can also do it by simply clicking on the “Plus” Icon, and then tapping on the “Track Workout”. This will give you the option to directly select any of the activities and start working out.

Third-Party compatible apps:

Let’s say you use a Garmin device for tracking your workouts through an app like Strava, but there are things that you love about Google Fit, and you want your data from Strava to Google fit. So there is nothing to worry about Google had made it easy to seamlessly integrate you Fit app to many Third-party apps just like Strava.

Google Fit is so versatile that it is compatible with almost all third-party famous apps. Some of them are listed below.

8fit

Adidas Running

Adidas Training

AlFit

BetterMe

BodySpace

Calm

Calorie Counter — Asken Diet

Calorie Counter by FatSecret

Lose It!

Lose Weight at Home

Health Sync

Clue Period Tracker

Daily Yoga

Dreem Coach

Drink Water Reminder

Endomondo

Fastrack Relfex

Feelfit

Fitwell

Fossil Hybrid Smartwatches

Freeletics

Glow: Fertility Calculator

Map My Run

Map My Walk

Mindbody

Monitor Your Weight

Moto Body

MyFitnessPal

Nike Training Club

Noom

Oura

PlexFit for Pebble

Pokémon Go

Pokewalk

Polar Flow

Progression Workout Tracker

HealthifyMe

Huawei Health

Impact: Fitness & Charity

Instant Heart Rate / Plus

Instant — Quantified Self, Track Digital Wellbeing

Jefit

Leap Fitness Group apps for weight loss

LG Health

Lifesum

Map My Fitness

Map My Ride

Qardio

Headspace

Sony SmartBand 2 SWR12

Sony SmartBand Talk SWR30

Strava

Under Armour Record

VeryFitPro

Walgreens

WearFit 2.0

Weight Track Assistant

Withings Health Mate

Workout Trainer

Xiaomi Mi Fit

What devices are compatible with Google Fit:

This is a question that appears in minds of so many people. As there are so many options out there for hardware devices, and different people have different preferences. If an app like FIT is not compatible with the fitness devices that are out there, what good is it for then? I am going to bring a piece of great news right here right now for you. That this awesome app is compatible with almost all health and fitness devices out there. I will only mention a few below.

5 Latest Fitness device Brands that are compatible with Google Fit:

Xiaomi Mi Band 6, Mi Band 5, Mi Band 4, and Mi Band 3

Withings ScanWatch, Move, and Move ECG

Withings Body Cardio, Body, and Body Plus smart scales

Eufy Smart Scale, Smart Scale C1

Smart Scale P1

Other Fitness apps to be Considered:

As by far we all know that Fit is basically a tracker. It helps you track your activity and give you heart points. Sometimes there is more than people expect from a fitness app, if you are one of those guys, you might want to turn to an alternative. What could be more that people want from a fitness app? To name a few

Calories information

Macbreakdown of food

Meal plans

Exercises

Online community and blogs

Food Database

So these are some more in detail options that people often look for in a fitness app as it gives more enhanced and in-depth information. If you are looking for all these things, I am afraid Google Fit is not your cup of tea. But there are really amazing apps ut there solely for this purpose like MyFitnessPal comes with all the options required for fitness goals, it has an unlimited number of features and perks that give you complete control over what you eat and how you plan your health goals. You can learn about such apps in these articles.

Keep your journal:

This is also one of the amazing features of Google Fit that it keeps a journal of your health and activities, you can easily get access to it by clicking the journal Icon in the main bar at the bottom of the app. It stores all of your data in that journal, the goals that you have achieved every day and then it combines it like a report for the whole month.

Good sleep is a key to Good health:

Yes, often undervalued, sleep is one of the most important factors that determine your health. If you are not having proper sleep you will be facing many health-related issues, restless nights end up in restless days. If you don’t sleep well at night you will not be performing your best during your day. Google knew that so it came with a sleep tracker, this helps you schedule your sleep and wake up time, it also tracks your sleeping behavior and sums up your last night’s sleep. You will understand by the data how well have you slept at the night.

Google will need your permission to track your sleep.

Google Fit Reviews:

The overall rating for this app is 3.9 on google play. Most of the people who use it fall in love with the simplicity and productivity of the app.

Also, Check

How to Download Google Fit APK:

You can easily download the app from your browser by following these steps.

Read the whole features of the game and then tap on the Download button.

Wait for the Download File to generate

Once it is generated. Tap on the Download button again

This will start the file to download.

When the download is finished, a confirmation window will pop up.

How to Install :

Once you have your downloaded file ready follow this guide.

First of all, go to your device’s settings

Go to Privacy> Unknown Sources Installations> Enable

If you have a newer Android device, then make sure to enable the Unknown Device option in your Browser Settings.

Now Select the Apk or Mod apk file that you have downloaded.

Simply open it and tap on Install.

That’s it

You can also download it from Google PlayStore.

[kirain]

Indie Game Reviews

Hello, everyone! After I posted about the games I’ve platinumed I received a few asks about the Indie games I’ve played, so I figured: “Why not review my favourites?” Below is a list of Indie games I’ve played that I consider above average. Hopefully this list will help people decide if they’re worth playing or not. Keep in mind, though, that these are my opinions. If anyone would like to discuss the games further, please feel free to message me or send me another ask specifying the game you’re interested in. I’m always happy to discuss games. XD

Whispering Willows

Whispering Willows is like a throwback to the 90s computer games that we all loved and played when we were kids. With a spooky atmosphere and almost game board-ish feel, the story takes place on an old mansion property where a young girl named Elena Elkhorn must depend on her Native American roots to find her missing father. Switch between human and soul to solve puzzles, overcome obstacles, and attack enemies. Though a bit slow-paced, the story and gameplay are solid and definitely worth a try. 6/10

CounterSpy

CounterSpy is a fun little platformer that's almost comedic in nature. You play as a (possibly) British spy during the Cold War, who spies on the Russian and American forces to prevent nuclear detonation on both sides. The missions are pretty straight forward, with you shooting or sneaking your way through enemy territory to discover their plans of attack. If you fail to thwart them ... it's the end of the world! While it isn't really anything too special, its in-your-face 1970s James Bond style music and gameplay are entertaining as hell, and if you set it to the hardest difficulty, it is a fun challenge. I'd recommend it as a good time-waster. 6/10

Assemblance

Assemblance is a psychological first person thriller, where you play as a man who is forced to repeat a time paradox over and over until you figure out a way to move on. The story is subpar at best, but it's not terrible. The graphics are beautiful and very relaxing, as is the music. I've heard this game be described as a "mind fuck" too, but I'm not sure if I'd give it quite that much credit. Either way, it is a good game if you're looking for something to pass the time, and if you're looking for a light challenge. 6/10

Velocibox

Velocibox is a pure challenge game where you control a tiny square that zooms through various obstacle courses. It doesn't sound like much, but the levels can be extremely frustrating and the trophies are so hard to attain that they've only been awarded to a ridiculously small percentage of players-- we're talking hardcore gamers with no life (like me). If you're looking for a fun challenge, this is the game for you. 6/10

The Park

The Park is a first person, mostly cinematic horror game, where you play as a schizophrenic mother who chases her son through a theme park that she used to visit when she was a child. As you play, you begin to ask yourself if what you're seeing is real or if it's just the result of the mother's mental illness. There are a few jump scares and puzzles to solve, but all and all it's basically a horror movie, with a child so un-likable he makes you miss the boy from Babadook. The story is worth exploring, however, and the graphics and voice work are topnotch. I'd give it a chance, unless you scare easily. 6/10

Race the Sun

Race the Sun is a meticulous challenger game where you steer a tiny plane through an endless field of obstacles. The objective of the game, aside from collecting trophies, is to simply beat your own record before you crash or run down. You collect extra points by hitting rings, which eventually allows you to upgrade your plane for future levels. While I will admit that at first the game is fairly addictive, it can get a little boring. You can't memorize the fields because they change and randomize every 24 hours, which is a neat idea, but it still does little to keep players interested. But if you're looking for a decent challenge, then I highly recommend this game. Personally, I've come to use it as a fun time-waster while I download other games. 6.5/10

Everybody's Gone to the Rapture

Everybody's Gone to the Rapture is a story-based video game where you divulge the disappearance of an entire town. I wouldn't suggest this game to people who prefer action-packed shooters or tricky platformers, because aside from walking around and watching a beautiful cinematic story unfold, there isn't much else to do. Don't get me wrong, though; the game is still highly enjoyable. You play from a first person point of view and collect clues that give you insight to the missing townspeople. Each clue reveals a short story that helps you arrive at the conclusion, in the form of several astral projections. Aside from the creative story and stunning graphics, the voice acting is also incomparable. Definitely worth a play through if you're into cinematic game play. 6.5/10

The Unfinished Swan

The Unfinished Swan is a first person puzzle game where you play as a young orphaned boy named Monroe. The game is relaxing and wacky, as paint your way through various levels to help Monroe finish his recently deceased mother's favourite painting. As you play, a world of imagination unfolds, and the air of innocence reminds you what it was like to be a child. Definitely worth a try if you're looking for something light-hearted. 7/10

The Fall

The Fall is a puzzle platformer where you play as an advanced robotic spacesuit AI named Arid. The game begins with you crash-landing on a seemingly abandoned planet, with your pilot injured and unresponsive inside you. In order to save him, you search the planet for medical supplies, but soon find that the robotic inhabitants are dangerously malfunctioning. To save your pilot, you must succumb to several tests, forced on you by the head AI, and defeat an army of homicidal robots. The puzzles are fun and challenging, the story is wholly original, and the twist ending makes you think you're watching The Sixth Sense. If you're looking for an intelligent Sci-Fi Indie game, you're looking for The Fall. 7/10

White Night

White Night is a horror survival game where you play as an unnamed man who crashes outside of a haunted estate. Injured and in need of help, he hobbles to the mansion and breaks in, desperate when no one answers the door. Once inside the house, certain events transpire and horror ensues. I won't spoil the plot, but there is a twist ending and a story worth experiencing. The game has a very noir-type feel to it on top of the horror genre, which I thought was very unique. To beat the game, you must outwit the ghosts that hunt you, solve puzzles, and discover clues that eventually prompt the ending. The game also does an excellent job at making you feel helpless and vulnerable, as your only defences are running, hiding, and depending on matches for light. I personally didn't have this problem, but I have heard people complain about their eyes hurting after a few hours of gameplay-- so as a warning, the game is almost entirely black and white. If you're not sure if you can handle that, then I'd highly suggest watching a spoiler-free video on YouTube before buying, just to see how well you adjust. Overall, it's a great game that I highly recommend. 7/10

Contrast

Contrast is a platformer clearly meant for the PC, but it is playable on consol. If I had to describe the setting, I'd say it's almost Tim Burton-y in nature. You play as a voiceless woman named Dawn, who watches over and guards a little girl named Didi. Didi lives with her poverty-stricken mother in a tiny house in a town filled with corruption and debauchery. With no friends and nowhere to go during the day, Didi sneaks out at night to play; therefore, it is your job to make sure she stays safe. When her father starts meddling with some dangerous loan sharks, however, events transpire and you must help her save her family. Aside from some irritating controls on consol, the game is great and the story, obstacles, and puzzles are magnificent. The voice acting is also highly commendable, which was a pleasant surprise. Didi is actually voiced by a little girl, not an adult playing a child, and she did such an excellent job I thought Disney hired the cast. I definitely recommend this game, especially if you play on PC. 7.5/10

The Vanishing of Ethan Carter

The Vanishing of Ethan Carter is another story-based game in which you play as a first person detective searching for a missing boy named Ethan Carter. Much like Everybody's Gone to the Rapture, the game is almost entirely cinematic with a gripping story and stunning graphics. While exploring various locations, you will find clues and solve intricate puzzles in order to piece together what happened to Ethan. Without spoiling the plot, I can only say that the mystery turns very dark and engaging. Definitely worth a penny or two. 7.5/10

SOMA

SOMA has repeatedly been praised by fans for its "mind-blowing" original story and designs, but I personally took issue with some aspects of the game. I will agree first and foremost that the story is fresh beyond belief: it begins with you, Ethan, booking an appointment with a famous neurologist after viewing a flashback of a car crash. It becomes apparent that Ethan suffered a brain contusion during the accident, which could, at any given moment, kill him. The next day you visit the doctor and agree to an experiment that could help Ethan and others like him. After a long conversation, you get strapped into a machine, then wake up in an underwater, apocalyptic hell. SOMA has also been described as a "mind fuck", and you might agree, especially when it comes to certain choices you're forced to make. I personally found the game to be a bit buggy, which is apparently common, slightly slow, and somewhat boring at times. The bulk of the game consists of you exploring a huge map and evading "monsters", which can be rather irritating when they get too close. There are some horror elements to the game, but nothing spectacular. All and all, it's worth a quick run through, if not for the story alone. 7.5/10

Type:Rider

Type:Rider is an educational platformer where you play as a colon (two dots) and work your way through several levels to learn about the origins of various forms of print. If you'd rather just play the game you can easily skip the information-- but I promise you, it's fascinating. You can learn about Script, Gothic, Times New Roman, etc. The game itself is a blast, but the history lessons work as an added bonus. 7.5/10

Oxenfree

Oxenfree is an intriguing supernatural mystery graphic adventure where you play as a teenager trapped on a costal island. What at first seems like a harmless trip with friends, it quickly turns into a living nightmare when strange events begin to occur. The story itself is distinctive and gripping, where certain decisions you make help determine the outcome. The game has several endings and multiple puzzles that require independent success or teamwork with the other NPCs. The gameplay is smooth and soothing, the visuals are clean, and the story is outstanding. Highly recommend. 8/10

Feist

Feist is an adorable platformer with some of the most intelligent enemies I've ever seen. If you're up for a challenge, they'll make sure you're not disappointed. Though a mostly dark game, with the main character, the enemies, and much of the levels being a black silhouette, the game is fun and endearing. You play as a cute, unidentifiable creature that fights through obstacles to save his abducted partner. The game has a very primordial feel to it, with a sort of "survival of the fittest" connotation. Without the strength or biological advantages that your enemies have, you must rely on your superior intellect. The trophies are also incredibly difficult to achieve, half of them being speed runs, with almost no players having platinumed it. Aside from a few glitches that occur every now and then, the game is definitely worth buying. 8/10

The Swapper

The Swapper is a platformer where you must solve various puzzles by making and erasing copies of your own character. There is a story to follow, set in space, where you begin to experience weird occurrences. Each new area offers harder and harder puzzles, but nothing unmanageable. For me, the true wonders of this game are the graphics and music. The soundtrack is so beautiful and ambient that I found myself downloading the whole score halfway through the game. The map is relatively confusing when you get a bit further in, so you might find yourself lost every now and then. You do have to backtrack to some levels, so I suggest learning the layout early on. All and all, it's a fun challenge well worth your time. 8/10

Wick

Wick isn't a game I would recommend to anyone who frightens easily. The game is riddled with jump scares and portrays a haunting story about five dead children and their psychotic killer. Despite being a survival horror, there is a story to explore through certain clues that you can collect while playing. The game has several challenges, including a DLC that answers a lingering question that looms over you throughout the original levels. In order to beat the DLC, though, great memorization of the map and clue locations is required. Wick also holds some of the hardest trophies I've ever achieved for an Indie. The game itself takes place in a very small campground at night, where you are pursued by the five dead children. Your only source of light is a candle, which burns out if you don't locate more. Each level runs longer and longer and introduces a new child every time, each with their own unique form of hunting you. If you decide to brave this game, prepare for a long night. (Game is not as slow as the gif suggest) 8/10

Octodad: Dadliest Catch

Before I get into this game, I must be sure to tell everyone that it is likely a game for children, so I'll be judging it from a child's perspective. While I don't see it winning a ton of awards, even as an adult I'll admit it's fun as hell. You play as an octopus with a wife and two children, so already the theme is ridiculous. To make matters worse, your family doesn't know that you're an octopus, so you have to do your best to keep it a secret. Throughout the game you must perform various mundane tasks, but as an octopus the controls are intentionally wonky, which makes for some hilarious accidents. There is also a story to follow with a rather adorable ending. The game is colourful, cartoonish, original, and warm-hearted. Perfect for anyone who's looking for something soft and enjoyable. 8/10

She Wants Me Dead

She Wants Me Dead is a noir-type platformer, possibly set in New York City, where you play as a man trying to outsmart his homicidal cat. The cat, after being neglected by her owner, forces you to work your way through various traps and obstacles. The levels naturally get more and more challenging as you progress, but the game itself is incredibly fun. Additionally, only one song is played throughout every level, but it's one of the most kickin' songs I've ever heard in a platformer-- "She Wants Me Dead" by CAZZETTE vs. AronChupa ft. The High. The beat of the music actually helps you determine when it's safe to jump, which I thought was really cool. If you're looking for a decent challenge, I'd highly recommend this game. 8/10

Layers of Fear

Much like Wick, Layers of Fear is a first person horror game filled with jump scares and a recurring theme of helplessness. Nothing scares me, but when I had my sister play this game she got a headache and threw me the controller-- it scared her that badly. The game does a stellar job at recounting the story of a painter gone mad as you explore his house and piece together his past. Aside from the spooky atmosphere and wonderful graphics, Layers of Fear also includes one of the most hauntingly beautiful soundtracks I've ever heard. If you're looking for a good mystery/horror game, Layers of Fear would be my first recommendation. 9/10

ABZÛ

ABZÛ is an adventure art video game where you play as a female diver who silently uncovers the ruins of an ancient civilization. The entire game takes place in the ocean, where the eco system seems to be terribly damaged and unbalanced. As you swim through each beautifully crafted level, you discover the reason for the imbalance and work to revitalize the ocean. The graphics are spectacular, the story is new, and, if desired, the game is also educational with nods to marine biology. The overall control of the character takes some getting used to, but I highly recommend this game to anyone looking for something uplifting and peaceful. 9/10

Typoman

Typoman is an adorable little platformer where you play as an all-black typographical character made up of the letters H E R O. The game itself is particularly unique, with every enemy and almost every level being made primarily of letters. The story sports a creative battle of good versus evil in the form of words, with "good" words having positive effects and "bad" words having negative effects. As the hero, you must solve puzzles and traverse through a post-apocalyptic wasteland to defeat the evil running rampant through the streets. The graphics are gorgeous, the story is amazing, and if not for the game's unfortunate tendency to crash during the mini games and mild glitches, I would have given it a perfect ten. 9/10

Unravel

Buy it. Just buy it. I shouldn't have to say anything else, but I will. Unravel is a beautiful Swedish platformer where you play as a little red character named Yarny. As you may have already guessed, Yarny is made of yarn, and as you control him you embark on a journey to find multiple missing ornaments for a photo album. Each ornament produces a page of pictures that "unravels” the story of Yarny's family (humans who don't know that he can move). Each level presents a menagerie of fun obstacles and atmospheres. Aside from the flawless controls and beautiful story line, Unravel impresses players with gorgeous graphics and a soundtrack that could put Mozart to shame. Highly, highly recommend. 10/10

Inside

Inside is a puzzle-platformer adventure game that really tugs at your imagination. The story is multi-layered and brilliantly crafted without a single word of dialogue. Without knowing or understanding where the story is headed, you play as a nameless boy who traverses through many psychological puzzles, with danger lurking around every corner. Since the game's release, no one has been able to decipher what the story is truly about, but if I had to guess, I'd say it presents an Orwellian dystopia that forces mind control on the masses and foreshadows our eventual future. I believe the entire game is a controlled experiment, wrought by the facility that you're trying to escape-- but really, who's to say for sure? The controls, story, and graphics are crisp, seasoned, and endearing, and they convey a uniqueness of the highest calibre. Highly recommend. 10/10

Limbo

Limbo is a two-dimensional puzzle-platformer designed by the same company that produced Inside. Much like Inside, you play as a nameless boy who awakens in the middle of a forest on "the edge of hell". How the boy died or if he's even truly dead is a mystery. While searching for your sister, you encounter other hostile children, mechanical traps, murderous creatures, and all around unfriendly environments. As you play, you begin to wonder if anyone is trustworthy and if there's a way out of the forest at all. The game does not hold your hand, so it is up to you to depend on your wits to succeed. Besides being pleasantly enigmatic, the gameplay is also awesome and I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys peaceful but challenging platformers. 10/10

Journey

Journey is an interactive adventure game where you assume the role of a figure clad in robes. While able to play alone, online gameplay allows other players to connect with you, which enables you to share the adventure. The story is silently narrated through cut scenes that you unlock as you venture through the desert, eventually ending up at a snowy mountain. This game is definitely meant as a "feel good" type of platformer, with music and graphics that put some mainstream games to shame. The story consists of you, the character, realizing the fall of an ancient civilization while avoiding the giant automatons left over from the war that destroyed it. I would also argue that the journey you embark on is a quest to find your ancestors, who later guide you to paradise. While I couldn't confirm this and it might not be true, I personally believe that this game was also heavily inspired by the Hinduism. For anyone looking for a relaxing, family-friendly adventure, this is the game I would recommend. 10/10

Little Nightmares

I'm sure that by now most of you have heard of Little Nightmares. Personally, my sister and I were looking forward to this game long before it hit the mainstream, and I'm happy to say we were not disappointed. Ironically enough, Little Nightmares ended up being one of the best Indie games I've ever played. With a Spirited Away meets Tim Burton feel, Little Nightmares gives us a puzzle-platformer horror adventure game superior to all others. No one knows the true plot of the story, which has sprung theory after theory after theory from fans, as you work your way through the mysterious Maw and avoid being eaten. I also have my own theories, but if I went into that we'd be here forever. I'll simply say this: Little Nightmares triggers your imagination and keeps you on the edge of your seat. While some people have complained about the slow load times, the only complaint I have is that it's relatively short. I could have played this game for days without getting bored. The horror element is almost kid-friendly, the graphics are stupendous, and the character designs are out of this world. I might even start collecting the comics. 10/10

[cooperandjonesinc]

No Lyrics, Just Words

A secret santa gift for @no-denying-shes-a-funny-girl as part of the Bughead Secret Santa gift exchange!

Rating: G

Words: 2478

Summary: Even though they’re both writers, Betty and Jughead were never any good at communicating. That’s why long before there was an exchange of kisses, there was an exchange of music.

(A fluffy New Years fic with way too many song references.)

It starts just before Betty leaves for her summer internship. She starts a group chat with Jughead and Archie, Jughead isn’t sure why he qualifies or why she thinks he cares, but he finds himself scrolling through anyway, hating every minute. The first song she ever sends him is actually to both of the boys. It’s Despacito. Later he will be grateful that at least she sent the original all Spanish version rather than the Beiber remix.

The issue is that he kind of likes it. It’s got a good beat, it’s sexy. He can imagine Betty dancing around her room mumbling along to the words she doesn’t understand. In his mind’s eye she dances in short shorts and a tank top that rides up exposing a hint of skin at her belly. That’s where he cuts the thought off. The day she arrives at her internship he sends her Welcome to Paradise by Greenday. Someone has to expose her to good music. A month later, after he’s heard the song dozens of times, he feels differently about that Latin beat.

During the months they are apart they talk very little. Even Archie barely hears from her, but he begins to fade away into his music too. She sends Jughead some songs that indulge his taste in music. Say It Ain’t So by Weezer floats through the trailer for a solid week after she reminds him that it exists. He retaliates with Here by Alessia Cara after Archie drags him to one summer bonfire thrown by the evil redheaded twins. It’s nice. It makes him feel connected to her even though no words are exchanged. He means to continue the tradition through the year, but Jason Blossom’s body washes ashore and suddenly there’s no time to worry about things like that anymore.

Betty misses the music as they run around town unraveling the mysteries of the bloody murder and cover up. When he cups her face in his hands and forever changes how she sees him she realizes that something started between them long before. She’d just been too blinded by a shock of red hair to notice. After the baby shower among their text messages she slips in a link to Paramore’s The Only Exception. She expects to receive back something sentimental. Instead he sends her Creep. As a jest she throws a boyband song back his way. The next time they meet he laughs at her, but she has trouble returning it. Part of her knows he means it, that he believes in those lyrics. When she finally admits to the crescent scars on her hands they share a set of headphones listening to The Monster with Eminem and Rihanna sharing space with their thoughts.

FP’s arrest, finding the tape, Cliff’s death, Cheryl’s suicide attempt, Fred’s shooting. All of it happens in 72 hours. The Sound of Silence echoes heavy in their consciousness.

When Jughead moves to Southside High the music stops again. For the first few days Betty hopes it’s for the same reason they stopped before. Their relationship was strong, they didn’t need to exchange songs when everything they needed to say they just shared with each other. But it’s not like that at all. It’s a scarce few miles between the two sides, but it may as well have been continents. The Black Hood complicates things even further. They break up without a single note left hanging in the air. When she comes to her senses and finally spills every secret she’s been holding in they get back together in a whirl of hushed whispers and hurried kisses. Unable to part from him she spends her nights in his bed.

The first song he ever sends her after joining the Serpents is Lydia by Highly Suspect. It isn’t just a spotify link to the song either. He sends her a link to the video. It starts with a shot of a girl underwater. The camera never leaves her. Two minutes in and she’s still submerged, tied down. There are no breaks, no cut aways. Betty is simply watching this girl drown. When her vision swims and her world starts to tilt Betty realizes that in sympathy she’s been holding her own breath. Her lungs fill with fire as she heaves air in. Suddenly she’s hyperventilating, she’s panicking. She can’t breathe. Jughead can’t breathe. He’s drowning with the Serpents, in over his head with no where to go. The song ends. The girl is still in the water, and Betty knows what she has to do. She has to dive into the pool with the Serpents to help Jughead get out.

For some reason it never even occurs to her that instead of setting Jughead free, she’d just get tangled into the same mess. The music stops.

It also never crossed her mind that she might just end up being actual friends with Toni. It starts with Toni pulling her aside after the disastrous dance.

“Mad respect for pulling it out like that, but you know dancing isn’t the only step to becoming a Serpent, right?”

No, she didn’t know. Jughead told her a little bit about his initiation, but not enough.

She knows, of course, that it’s a gang. She knows she’s entering into a world of blackmail, drugs, and other nefarious activities. But it doesn’t feel like that. It feels like being welcomed into a family. The Whyte Wyrm is an amalgam of bad Thanksgiving cliches. Yeah, your drunk racist aunt is chain smoking in the corner, but the rest of the group are people who get you in a way no one else will. The Coopers never felt right to Betty. Apparently she’d just been spending time with the wrong half of her DNA. Maybe she always belonged with the snakes. Well, most of them anyway.

Word travels fast about the Snake Charmer. The ruthless vicious part of Betty that nearly drowned Chuck is gloriously pleased at the vengeance. Her conscience quickly admonishes itself for thinking such things. No one deserves to have swaths of flesh cut off their arm. Then her rationale cuts in. This woman is not someone to be trifled with. She’d be looking for retribution of her own.

It’s Toni’s job to hide the streaming camera that catches Penny typing in her password. When Betty breaks into the office that night she hums Secret by the Pierces to herself. Because two can keep a secret if one of them is dead.

Predictably Tall Boy is the one Penny calls to her defense. “They cornered me!” She screeches to the crowd in the Wyrm. “They cut the snake right off my skin! Is that what Serpents do to each other?”

She’s chosen a day when Jughead is at school, obviously trying to start a revolt, “This can not stand!”

“Here Here! We’ve had nothing but trouble coming down on our heads since F.P’s boy got it in his head to try and take over.” Tall Boy adds to the growing restlessness.

“Hey Penny,” Betty shouts over the din, “Remind me why the kids jumped you.”

She sneered, “Because they weren’t willing to paid an agreed upon price. Is that what we want the next generation to be, welshers?” The crowd roared their approval.

“So you weren’t blackmailing them?” Toni stood tall at her side. They made a formidable team.

“I do what it takes to get the job done. Hey, I didn’t want to, but the Jones’ haven’t been trustworthy.”

“Not trustworthy?” Betty shook her head, “I think going to jail without a word was pretty high up. Tell me, Tall Boy, what have you done that made you not worthy of Ms. Peabody’s trust?”

“The hell you mean?” Tall Boy asked.

“Well,” Betty pulled out a few photos she’d taken upon herself to download. “She has several photos of you. Tell me, how long is the statute of limitations on aggravated assault? Because however long it is, that’s how long she owns you.”

As he flipped through the photos Tall Boy’s face grew redder.

“Now, I can explain that.” Penny pleaded

“Can you explain all of them? Because I think there’s something in here on every single person in this bar right now. Is this your way of never betraying your own? Is this how you make sure a Serpent never stands alone?”

Betty doesn’t have to say another word. The crowd took it away from her. Penny was forced to flee out the back. In all the commotion somehow Betty ends up with a jacket with a Serpent patch.

“Damn, B, you’re kind of ruthless.” Toni remarks.

“Dark. Most people call it dark.”

It feels like home.

++++++++++++

The snow falling on New Year’s eve is that glittering snow that falls in huge wet flakes. It’s snowman weather since it all clings together on mittens and eyelashes. In the house behind Betty a New Year’s bash rages. Reggie volunteered to host, followed swiftly by Cheryl commandeering the role since Reggie was apparently useless at planning anything. It was a great party, or at least everyone else seemed to think so since Betty was the only person avoiding it by sitting in the snow. Loud bass reverberated against the windows making them shudder. It was only a matter of time before the Sheriff would get called.

“Hey, Betts.” Jughead’s voice was soft in the twilight.

“Are you coming out here to smoke? Seems to be the only reason people step outside.” She shivered. Her dress barely went to her knees, so even with her cloak covering her upper half she was freezing.

Jughead smirked, “I thought you knew me better than that, Ms. Cooper. Nah, I think I’m just going to go. There’s nothing here for me.”

“Me too. I think I’ll head out soon.”

“What you’re not here to find romance?” He said. He tried to come off joking, but the bitterness clung.

“Nope. I kissed someone just for saying, ‘I need you Betty Cooper’ not too long ago. I think my judgment is compromised. If only the kiss had felt as good as hearing the words.”

Jughead stepped down next to her, his heavy boots thumped on the wooden steps. “Didn’t turn out well?” he asked as he sat next to her.

“I’m pretty sure I gave him a look that can only be classified as, ‘Horrified’, so yeah, I’d say not good is putting it mildly.”

They chuckled, “Can I ask who the lucky guy was or would that be weird?”

“Not weird.” She swallowed, “Archie. During the four seconds he was broken up with Ronnie.”

Quietly Jughead said, “You finally snagged the football star and didn’t like it?”

“No. He tasted like old dreams and disappointment. I don’t know what I was expecting, but not that. Actually, I do know what I was expecting. I was expecting it to be like it was with you. A revelation.”

“A revelation, huh?” He sounded rather smug, “Speaking of, I hear you finished the job I started on the Snake Charmer. You shouldn’t have done that, Betty. You’re in her crosshairs now.”

Betty groaned, “Can we not? I think something’s too dangerous for you, so I leave you behind. You think something is too dangerous for me and leave me behind. I’m going to do stupid things without you, the darkness is there even when you’re not. Let’s quit thinking we know what’s best for each other. It’s getting exhausting.”

“Yeah, I guess. But that seems to be all we can say to each other. If we’re not going to talk, what do you suggest we do?”

Just then the first few strands of Despacito floated through the walls. Betty giggled as she pulled Jughead to his feet. He reluctantly allowed her to move him into some semblance of a dance that ended with them giggling furiously in each other’s arms.

“Betty, can I tell you a secret?” He pulled her in close so that his breath was on her neck.

“Anything.” She whispered back, basking in his heat.

“I really, really, hate this God damned song.”

Betty was over come with another wave of giggles. “How is that a secret?”

“Most people who say they hate it secretly like it. Hell, I used to be one of them. Now I just plain hate it, but I listen to it all the time.”

“Why listen to a song you hate?”

“Because it was the first song you ever sent me.” He said with a shrug. “Did you know that despite it being the song of the summer it was actually released January 7th? So, happy song-versary I guess.”

She ran a finger down his cheek, “You too, Jughead. I wish we had made it as far.”

He tilted his head down, hers went up. Their mouths inched closer together.

Jughead pulled abruptly back, “No wait. This is stupid. We can’t do this again.”

“Why is it stupid? I mean it Jug, tell me why we shouldn’t keep fighting for each other.”

“Because you know what people say about repetition and insanity. Nothing’s different. We’ll just loop around again, breaking each other’s hearts in the process.”

“Then let’s break the circle. Let’s do something different this time.” Betty said.

“What?”

She took his hands in hers, “No more songs. I’m not saying we shouldn’t also send each other music, I’m just saying that we have to actually talk to each other. You have to stop believing that you’re protecting me from situations by jumping off a cliff and laving me stranded in a field. Just give me the option of taking your hand and leaping with you. Half the time I’m doing the same thing from the other side of the ledge anyway. We’ve said no more secrets before, but broke it so quickly. I’m never going to be that golden girl I was before I left for the internship. I know who I am now. This time, let’s mean it. Let’s go down swinging together.”

Through the windows came the sounds of the countdown to midnight.

“What do you say, Juggie? New Year’s resolution?”

6… 5… 4…

He kissed her hand, then let go so he could cup her cheek, “This year we leap together. No more lyrics, just words.”

3… 2… 1…

He leaned in and kissed her. Yeah, it was going to be a great year.

[gospelmusic]

Catholic Daily Reading + Reflection: 3 December 2020 - He Who Does The Will Of The Father Shall Enter The Kingdom Of Heaven

Readings at Mass for Thursday December 3, 2020

First Week of Advent Year B Vestment: White Today’s Rosary: The Luminous Mystery St. Francis Xavier (Memorial)

Entrance Antiphon Cf.Ps119:151 - 152

You, O Lord, are close, and all your ways are truth. From of old I have known of your decrees, for you are eternal.

Collect

Stir up your power, O Lord, and come to our help with mighty strength, that what our sins impede the grace of your mercy may hasten. Through our Lord. . .

FIRST READING

Let the righteous nation which keeps faith enter in. A reading from the Book of Isaiah (Isaiah 26:1-6) In that day this song will be sung in the land of Judah: “We have a strong city; he sets up salvation as walls and bulwarks. Open the gates, that the righteous nation which keeps faith may enter in. You keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord for ever, for the Lord GOD is an everlasting rock. For he has brought low the inhabitants of the height, the lofty city. He lays it low, lays it low to the ground, casts it to the dust. The foot tramples it, the feet of the poor, the steps of the needy.” The word of the Lord.

RESPONSORIAL PSALM Ps 118: 1 and 8-9.19-21.25-27 (R. 26a)

R. Blest is he who comes in the name of the Lord. Or: Alleluia. Give praise to the Lord, for he is good; his mercy endures forever. It is better to take refuge in the Lord  than to trust in man; it is better to take refuge in the Lord  than to trust in princes. R. Open to me the gates of justice:  I will enter and thank the Lord.  This is the Lord’s own gate,  Where the just enter.  I will thank you, for you have answered, And you are my saviour. R. O Lord, grant salvation;  O Lord, grant success.  Blest is he who comes in the name of the Lord. We bless you from the house of the Lord;  The Lord is God, and has given us light. R.

ALLELUIA

Alleluia. Seek the Lord while he may be found, call upon him while he is near. Alleluia. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

GOSPEL

He who does the will of the Father shall enter the kingdom of heaven. A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew (Matthew 7:21.24-27)  At that time: Jesus said to his disciples, “Not every one who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord, shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. Every one then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house upon the rock; and the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat upon that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And every one who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house upon the sand; and the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell; and great was the fall of it.” The Gospel of the Lord.

Today's Reflection

Today, the prophet Isaiah reminds us that in God, our security is ensured because for those who trust in the Lord, the Lord God will be their everlasting rock. The Gospel added that anyone who does the will of God is like one who builds his house on a solid rock. All this points to the fact that God is all we need! But is it not true that sometimes we profess our faith in God with our lips when in actual fact we have other things to call our gods. May God grant us the grace to have an active and firm faith in him and keep us as citizens of that strong city where salvation is set up as walls and bulwarks (Isa 26:1). Amen

Personal Devotional

"Do not let your heart envy sinners, but always be zealous for the fear of the Lord. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off." Proverbs 23:17-18 (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); - Pray for mercy for the times you have allowed envy to reign in your heart. - Pray for victims of envy, that God would vindicate and restore them - Pray for the grace to work in God’s vineyard trusting in his merciful judgement.

Let Us Pray

God of justice and mercy, open our eyes to see you in the face of the poor. Open our ears to hear you in the cries of the exploited open our mouths to defend you in the public squares as well as in private deeds. Remind us that what we do to the least ones, we do to you. In the name of Jesus – Amen.

(adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

Follow us on social media: Facebook: @hottestnaijadotcom Twitter: @wherehot Instagram: @hottest9jablog Disclaimer: This post contains links by our advertisers. Presence of such links does not warrant endorsements by HottestNaija. Your use of their services, is subject to their terms of service. Click here to take a look at our posts on gospel music download or click this link to see all posts that include gospel music lyrics You may also like our gospel worship songs page which contains, the best, coolest and hottest Nigerian Gospel Songs, and Foreign Gospel Songs. Whatsoever is the mood, we've got you covered. Do you feel like dancing, rejoicing, shouting, screaming, or you're filled with jubilation because of the Mighty things the Lord has done? Then look no further, cos our gospel praise songs page, containing the hottest Nigerian and foreign praise songs collection, was prepared specifically for you. Peradventure you need the lyrics of the songs you are downloading now, just downloaded, or have downloaded before, our lyrics page is the best place to look. What more could be more helpful and entertaining than seeing the lyrics of your most favourite song before you, as the music unfolds unto the climax. Hey we've been there before, and still encounter it from time to time when the vocals get lost in the cloud of heavy orchestration. Are You a Classical Music lover, our classical music page, contains the best of classical songs, composed and written by composers like G. F Handel, Bach, Joseph Haydn, etc. As you listen to your best gospel song, you may also want to get some more insight and knowledge about the word of God, from eBooks written by God's servants, or you may want to learn something new or build yourself up in some way. Then our eBook Page is the right place to look. You may be in need of entertainment, and probably want to watch a video too. We understand that as well. You can get entertaining music videos from our videos page.

[wizrocklopedia]

New Post has been published on Wizrocklopedia

New Post has been published on http://www.wrocklopedia.com/2017/12/19/new-music-review-calling-back-kelly-the-one-with-the-little-wizard-boy/

New Music Review: Calling Back Kelly "The One With The Little Wizard Boy"

Editor’s Note: Content on the ‘pedia has been a bit light this year due to staffer schedules and responsibilities, however that certainly doesn’t mean that there hasn’t been any news or releases on the wizard rock front! In fact, this year has seen a number of album and EP releases from bands new and old, as well as releases from bands that wouldn’t be considered “wizard rock”, although their albums certainly are.

We wanted to end the year on a high note with reviews of some of the new music that was released in 2017. This is not intended to be a comprehensive write-up of every single track from 2017; rather, it’s a way to give credit to the artists who are continuing to release fantastic wizard rock, while also hopefully introducing our readers to some new bands they may not have been aware of. 

As 2017 comes to a close and ushers in a new year, it’s important that we reflect on what constitutes “wizard rock” in this day and age. While there are still a good number of bands that focus exclusively on writing material based on the Harry Potter books, other non-wrock bands have released music that definitely falls under the “wizard rock” umbrella.

In other words, one doesn’t need to be a wizard rock band in order to release wizard rock music.

Just last month, the Cleveland, Ohio based Calling Back Kelly dropped their full length “The One With The Little Wizard Boy” on Bandcamp and we wanted to do this excellently-produced wizard rock album some justice.

As a quick overview, this reviewer wants to note this right out of the gate – the whole album is full of sick guitar riffage and extremely thoughtful lyrics. “The One With The Little Wizard Boy” is definitely on the heavier side of wizard rock, it’s not quite metal but falls on the hard modern rock side of music for sure. If you like pounding drums, thick bass, and excellent guitar playing, this is the wrock album for you. We also wanted to point out that this release is up on Bandcamp as Name Your Price, so you can get it for free, or offer a few bucks for the hard work that went into creating such a solid, well-sounding album. If you’re looking for some new releases to crank, you have no excuse to NOT have this one in your wizard rock collection.

The album kicks off with the track “Privet Drive” which starts with guitar harmonics and a nice grungy thick bass tone. Lyrically, the song is from Hagrid’s POV about having to stick Harry with those dreadful Dursleys as the book series opens. The music really kicks in for the chorus with nice drums and driving guitar, before coming back down to quieter guitar harmonics to close things out.

“Return to Sender” is an uptempo tune that reminds this reviewer of later AFI (in fact, much of the album does). Lyrically the song initially brings Aberforth to mind, complaining about how he felt Albus abandoned his family. It may not be his thoughts exactly (more on song meanings later), but once that theme got stuck in my head I couldn’t get it out. “Obviously Always” follows, featuring fantastic drums and layered vocals. The lyrics bring us Snape’s POV about his regrets, and the fact that he knows that he now has the life he deserves for his actions. Once again, the guitar riffing is on point, and musically, the song is relentless.

The fourth track “Hair of the Dog” is from Sirius’s POV about how he’s been driving himself for years purely on the thoughts of paying Pettigrew back, and doing his best to protect Harry. That’s all that’s been keeping him alive. That song is followed by “Minutes and Moments”, which starts with slightly out of tune guitar to build tension before it really kicks into gear. This angst-ridden song is from Harry’s POV about his realization that Dumbledore protected him in order for him to die. Knowing that his death is required to help defeat Voldemort weighs on him, along with the knowledge that others have died to help him when in the end, he still needs to die anyways. Some nice synth keyboard pads really help keep the tension throughout the song.

Neville gets some attention with the next track “Bloodline (Baby’s First Heavy)”; and man, he just draaaaaaaaaaaaags Voldemort. The heavy riffs relay the pain Neville has over his parents’ state thanks to Voldemort’s orders. This song gives a real Helmet vibe while listening to it’s heavy staccato riffing.

“Catching Smoke” is another banger, keeping up with the musical theme of the album. To be honest, there’s a lot of uptempo angsty and pissed off songs with little respite to your ears. Now, I guarantee you that’s not a problem for a lot of listeners, however I found myself wanting some quieter or down-tempo sections or songs to help make the crushing songs hit that much harder.

The lyrics in “Kill” seems like Snape and Harry are alternating verses about Snape’s death in the Shrieking Shack, and how much they hated each other, but needed each other to survive. Snape’s protection helped keep Harry alive, and that mission was what drove Snape. Unsurprisingly, the next song’s title “Left Ear” gives the subject matter away – it’s about George dealing with Fred’s loss. He knows his life will never be the same, and he will be reminded of the worst loss of his life every time he looks in the mirror. In fact, the bridge mentions the Mirror of Erised and it’s one of the more heartbreaking lyrics you’ll hear in such an uptempo song.

Finally, the album ends with the track “Swanson’s II”, which is really only a quick snippet of Ron Swanson talking about the little wizard boy, which was the inspiration for the album title.

All in all, “The One With The Little Wizard Boy” kicks a LOT butt, and if you like your wizard rock exactly that (ROCK!!!) then this is the album for you. Likewise if you like songs that don’t hit you upside the head with the meaning behind the lyrics; the songs all easily stand on their own with themes of loss, anger, and pain. If you knew someone who was resistant to wizard rock but likes heavy music, this album would make a great introduction for them.

You can follow the band on Facebook, and if you do so, let them know what you thought about their recent release. It’s great to see a muggle band pick up the wizard rock baton and run with it, and we can all hope that this won’t be their last release in the wizard rock category.

Do yourself a favor – head over to Calling Back Kelly’s Bandcamp, download the album, and CRANK IT. You won’t be disappointed.

[lindsaydoeslanguages]

FluentU Review 2019: Learning Korean with Videos

Back in 2015, I first discovered FluentU and used it to support my early Japanese studies. Another language FluentU supports is Korean, and when they reached out again recently and invited me to test the app and all its updates in the past few years on a free trial, I thought this was a great chance to update my review and learn Korean with videos. So, here’s my updated FluentU Review.

What is FluentU?

I made a quick 3 Minute Review to explain what it’s all about. Click play on the video below to watch that, or read on if you can’t watch video right now.

FluentU uses genuine video content from the internet to create their video based learning. There’s a website and an app available on Apple and Android.

Typically for each video there’s optional subtitles added below and a quiz for the new vocab you learn in that video. These words and phrases are then saved as flashcards on an SRS system (spaced repetition.)

There’s a good range of languages too – Spanish, Chinese, French, English, Japanese, German, Italian, Korean, Russian.

So what’s it all about?

Here’s how it works. You browse the videos available for the language you’re learning by level, once you’ve spotted one that takes your fancy, pick it and watch. The subtitles appear below in both languages. You can also tap any word throughout for a direct translation.

What I noticed and really liked is that the videos are ordered in a logical order too for your ability.

I’ve been working through some really fun Hangeul songs that I would have never found otherwise.

When the video is done, you have the choice to play with a quiz to start learning the words featured in the video. This is done by multiple sample sentences, some from the video and others not, ensuring that you can identify and understand your new vocabulary in different contexts. Smart idea, huh?

This is what’s normally missing for me when I learn vocab. I learn a word and then I remember it (or not) but I have no context. So for me, having different sentence examples is a big advantage.

In a nutshell then, FluentU is a fun and natural way to learn languages without feeling like you’re studying too hard. Pretty nifty.

How much is it?

FluentU isn’t free. But stuff this good rarely is. However, the pricing is nice and simple.

You can join for 14 days for free to try it out. After that, you have just one simple payment option. Either you join and pay the monthly subscription or you can also save if you join via an Annual Plan. In fact, that gets you 4 months free, which is a really good deal. So if you’re looking for something new to use regularly, then it’s a worthwhile investment.

Click here to visit their site and sign up to the free trial to have a little look around before buying. (That’s my affiliate link, which means FluentU give commission to me when you join via my link, so it’s also a great way to support Lindsay Does Languages!)

How to Make the Most of FluentU

Ok, so now you know more about what FluentU is about and the basics of how it works, let’s take a look at how you can make the most of FluentU. Because when you’re paying for a subscription, that’s exactly what you want to do.

1. Download for Offline Use

FluentU naturally works better on a tablet or a computer. That’s not to say that it doesn’t work on a phone – it does. But it’s much nicer to use with a bigger screen.

And the great thing in particular about using FluentU on a tablet is that you can download for offline use. So wherever you are, you can be using FluentU to help you learn languages on the go.

To do this, simply click the cloud with a little down arrow next to a video from the main feed. To access your downloads, click the top three lines in the top left corner of the app to open the menu bar, click ‘My Content’, which will open up a drop down menu. Now click ‘Downloaded’.

2. Make Playlists

Much like when you log onto YouTube, when you open FluentU, you’re presented with an array of videos.

These are adjusted to the level that you’ve listed for that language, but to really make the most of FluentU, create playlists of videos you want to watch.

You could group these playlists around particular topics, specific grammar points, or something else.

To do this, simply click a video from the main feed and click the very top ‘+’ that appears in a circle. You’ll then see a page asking you which playlist you want to add this video to. You can select an existing playlist or click ‘New Playlist +’ to create a new playlist.

To view your playlists, simply click the top three lines in the top left corner of the app to open the menu bar, click ‘My Content’, which will open up a drop down menu. Now click ‘My Playlists’.

3. Review Your Flashcards

Whatever you learn from the videos and the quizzes is saved in your flashcards. These work on an SRS (Spaced Repetition System) basis, which means you can trusts FluentU will only show you something when you need to practise so you won’t be wasting your time.

The flashcards work like the quizzes after the videos, so you get to see most words in various contexts too, sometimes with additional video clips instead of images to help you remember.

If you click ‘Flashcards’ on the main Browse bar (All, Video, Audio, Flashcards), you’ll see a range of flashcard decks available for download. But, to view your own, you’ll need to access it from somewhere else.

To do this, simply click the top three lines in the top left corner of the app to open the menu bar, click ‘My Content’, which will open up a drop down menu. Now click ‘My Flashcards’. Here you’ll see ‘My Vocab’ and ‘Already Known’ at the top.

4. Filter content

The content you see in your main feed when you log on will be adjusted to your level already depending on what you said your level was for that language when you first signed up.

If you feel like a challenge however, you can adjust this to filter content to show only specific levels. Perhaps this would be a good chance to create a playlist or two of interesting videos you want to catch up on in the future.

Alternatively, you could also filter content by the topic. For example, if you’re really interested in art, you’ll have much more success using content that’s interesting to you.

Finally, you also have the option to filter via format. Are you looking for clips, music videos, commercials, movie trailers, news or something else? The format of the video you watch might vary the style of language used so this can be a useful feature to help make the most of FluentU so you’re only seeing the best content for your level.

To do this, simply click ‘Filter’ in the top right on the main page when you open the app. Then select your filter options – you can select multiple options here – and click ‘Done’ to see your updated video feed.

5. Set a Daily Goal

Goals work. You probably know already if you’ve read anything on the blog before that I love me some good solid language goals!

FluentU allows you to set a daily goal right within the app. It’s even possible to set a daily notification reminder for your device so you’ll always remember to study.

To do this, simply click the top three lines in the top left corner of the app to open the menu bar, click the Settings cog at the bottom, and scroll to click ‘Daily Goal’. And if you want to set a Notification, tap that too to pick when you want your daily goal reminder. You’ll also need to allow notifications for the FluentU app in the main settings on your device for this bit to work.

6. Multiple Languages

What’s great about FluentU is that for the subscription price, you get access to all the languages they offer. Currently that includes Chinese, Spanish, English, French, German, Japanese, Italian, Russian and Korean.

Already got years of experience learning French back in school but feel like gentle practise and a refresher alongside your new language? You can do that. And you totally should seeing as it’s included in the same subscription.

To do this, simply click the top three lines in the top left corner of the app to open the menu bar, click the Settings cog at the bottom, and scroll to click ‘Language’.

Join FluentU

Ready to join FluentU?

Click here to sign up now and enjoy your free 14 day trial to see if it’s right for you.

Your Free Ultimate List of Language Learning Resources!

Looking for more language learning resources? I’ve put together an ever-growing Google Sheets file with language resources for over 30 different languages. It’s totally free and you can get a copy when you join my email list by clicking the image below.

Have you tried FluentU? What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!

The post FluentU Review 2019: Learning Korean with Videos appeared first on Lindsay Does Languages.

from WordPress https://ift.tt/2Ybuyko via IFTTT

[airadam]

Episode 136 : Protection

"I'm a walking heart attack, looking for somebody to happen..."

- Boogieman

Still shut up in the house for the most part, which at least gives me a chance to really dig through my crates, vinyl and otherwise! This month's selection has some great recent records, some older underground favourites, and a mix segment I've been wanting to do for ages - figured this episode was as good a time as any!

Twitter : @airadam13

Twitch : @airadam13

Playlist/Notes

Mac Ayres : Shadows

If nothing else, this enforced time spent in the house has yielded some great musical discoveries. I heard this cut on a DJ Jazzy Jeff Twitch session, and bought it immediately as soon as I found out what it was! Mac Ayers is a singer/songwriter/instrumentalist from Long Island, and if he's already turning out material like this in his early 20s, I can only imagine what it'll be with more experience. This is a highlight on last year's "Juicebox" album, and one that those who enjoy the modern soul sound will almost certainly enjoy!

[DJ Premier] Prhyme : My Calling (Instrumental)

This beat from "Prhyme 2" is so, so good. DJ Premier continues to turn out fresh creations over thirty years since his debut, with more different styles than he's often given credit for. The pianos sound like falling rain, the low end is the solid ground, and everything else fits perfectly around them.

Ski Beatz & Stalley : Gentlemen's Quarterly

Smooth from the lyrics to Ski Beatz' sophisticated production, this is a cut I'd managed to forget about until I rediscovered it in my collection recently. Find it on the "Ski Beatz 24 Hour Karate School Presents Twilight" (snappy!) LP, if you can find a reasonably-priced copy!

LL Cool J ft. Keith Murray, Prodigy, Fat Joe, and Foxy Brown : I Shot Ya (Remix)

A classic from the mid-90s. LL brought in some of the hottest MCs of the time alongside a young Foxy Brown making her on-record debut for a Trackmasters-produced street banger. The "Mr. Smith" album is the source for this often-sampled gem.

O.C. & Organized Konfusion : You Won't Go Far

Unapologetic boom-bap from this all-NYC combination, taken from the second volume of the "New Jersey Drive" soundtrack. Of all the tracks on that release, it's the one that hews closest to the plot of the film itself, which itself makes it a standout in the world of 90s Hip-Hop/R&B soundtracks! OK self-produced this one, and rather than give each MC a verse each, they split each verse between the three of them for more of a tag-team feel.

Rise : Make Sure That We Win

Note: I got this wrong on the voiceover - this is a Beatminerz beat, not DJ Spinna. Spinna produced the excellent "Part of the Game" on the same EP.

Rise is an MC out of Brooklyn and the Demigodz crew, who has a knack for punchlines and quotables within a laid back style - he just seems puzzled by wack MCs most of the time! The Beatminerz provide the beat with the fuzzbox guitars moving all over the soundscape and the classic boom-bap drum style and some sub bass to give it the heft. DJ Evil Dee of Da Beatminerz rounds things out with his cuts for the hook. Grab this and a couple of other great tracks on the 2003 "The Intro..." EP.

Pete Rock : Air Smoove

"Petestrumentals 2" may not become the low-key icon that the first instalment did, but don't sleep on it - it's still Pete Rock on the beats, after all.  I keep going back to it and finding myself enjoying tracks more and more, with this being a prime example.

Above The Law ft. 2Pac and Money B : Call It What U Want

I once nearly got into a fight (the other guy was heated) when I off-handedly mentioned that I remembered when 2Pac had been a dancer for Digital Underground - but it was true, and there was never any shame in it! Anyway, it was also with that crew that he made initial strides onto the mic, and after going solo himself, this was one of his first features, alongside Money B from DU. Above The Law's "Black Mafia Life", from which this is taken, is one of the most overlooked albums that could claim the accolade of "classic" when you listen to how it sounded and how early it was made - I strongly recommend that every listener seeks it out for an end-to-end hearing. It's striking to realise that of the four MCs on this cut, only two are still with us today - RIP 2Pac and KMG.

DJ Quik ft. Pharoahe Monch & K.K. : Murda 1 Case

An absolute stomper from Compton's finest, leading with the piano, keeping the drums hard but simple (kicks on 1 and 3 only, snares on 2 and 4), and three MCs going at it. On this clear standout on 2002's "Under Tha Influence", the underrated Quik holds his own against one of the best to pick up a mic, and shows the confidence and intelligence as a producer to know that this was the man to bring in for the closing verse.

De La Soul : Verbal Clap

Many years after their debut, De La remind you that they can get busy on a state-of-the-art thumping beat with no problem - in this case, a masterful creation by J Dilla, one of two on 2004's "The Grind Date". Dave's rhyme style here is extra raw and he dominates by sheer brute force, standing out even on an album where De La sound highly-motivated overall. If you don't yet know it, it's well worth your while to search it out and have a proper listen.

Mr. Scruff ft. Broke 'n' English : Listen Up

Manchester all the way on this track, with the DJ and producer Mr Scruff getting the drumline mad active with a nice bassline, and Strategy and DRS of Broke 'n' English bringing all the local flavour on the mic. This great cut is on the flip of the also-excellent "Nice Up The Function" 12", which is now available digitally - so no difficulty in finding a copy!

[The Neptunes] Busta Rhymes : Pass The Courvoisier, Part II (Instrumental)

A great party beat, one to get people moving even without Busta and Pharrell's vocals!

AZ : Take Care Of Me

From his very first LP, AZ was flowing over soul/R&B samples, so it wasn't a reach for him to make a track like this for "Aziatic", his fourth. Precision soundtracks it with a "no samples" approach which for the non-Bad Boy producers tended to be the move for the club/radio tracks, and it's aged fairly well. AZ's lyrics are definitely reflective of the time - cellphones are so unremarkable in 2020!

Krumb Snatcha ft. Boogieman : Oxygen

Krumb Snatcha is pretty much as rugged as it gets, but here he shows that while he can give you an underground street classic like "Closer To God", there's still time to have fun! This track from his second LP "Respect All, Fear None" isn't what you might expect from KS but I think he did a solid job here. Nottz' beat bumps and burbles with a solid low end, and the guest MC Boogieman, who's already collaborated with him previously, steals the show with a casually disrespectful closing verse - not a particularly technical one, but entertaining!

Mic Geronimo : Nothin' Move But The Money

This record was hated when it came out, of all the tracks in this section, it was the most blatant pander to the pop audience - after all, Puffy (now Diddy) was the producer! This was amplified by the fact that Queens' own Mic Geronimo was a darling of the underground scene after his excellent debut LP "The Natural", and this is a million miles away stylistically. "Vendetta" was a big change, and arguably a bit of a career killer because of it. Have a look at the video - every so often, Mic actually looks pretty uncomfortable! 

Goodie Mob ft. Big Boi and Backbone : Get Rich To This

This was the next most derided track when it was released - if someone else had recorded it, it may have been received for what it was, but again, this was a serious sonic whiplash for anyone who had heard "Soul Food" or "Still Standing". It was still Organized Noize on production, still the same MCs (plus guests), but definitely not what people were expecting, by and large. I can't front though - I kind of liked it even then! The "World Party" LP is the source for this one.

[Kenny Dope] L Swift : Ride This (Instrumental)

Crispy clean drums and a nice guitar line are the highlights of this beat from a 2000 12" by one of the MCs from the incredible Natural Elements (now reformed, with L Swift as Swigga). The vocal version features A Butta from NE and the B-side is produced by Spinna, so well worth picking up if you see it!

Toots & The Maytals : Funky Kingston

We close the episode with the title track of the 1973 album by the reggae legend "Toots" Hibbert, who passed away this month at the age of 77, and his band. The throatiness of his delivery on this classic cut does bring to mind the American funk godfather James Brown, but the message and the groove is pure yard. It may be almost fifty years old now, but still moves a dancefloor with ease!

Please remember to support the artists you like! The purpose of putting the podcast out and providing the full tracklist is to try and give some light, so do use the songs on each episode as a starting point to search out more material. If you have Spotify in your country it's a great way to explore, but otherwise there's always Youtube and the like. Seeing your favourite artists live is the best way to put money in their pockets, and buy the vinyl/CDs/downloads of the stuff you like the most!

Check out this episode!