#also I am well aware that I took this picture at sunset in game

[sytokun]

there's so many cool but missed opportunities in rwby for their characters, like sun! yk how he's based of "sun wukong" from journey to the west? IK its FOUR characters to a team but i think it would have really been cool if they took more inspo from journey to the west and made HIS team journey to the west characters

Honestly I think that'd be really cool to base the rest of SSSN on the other Journey to the West characters, especially when the basis for a four-man team is already there. And knowing that SSSN was modeled after K-pop boy band Big Bang, imagining the Journey characters as modern hot boys already sounds like an otome-game level move that would fit RWBY pretty well.

That said, if you're making your own interpretation of SSSN, such as by rewrite or AU, you're free to do so. It depends on whether you put more stock into a more cohesive theme for the team, or their original canon inspirations.

...Which is a good opportunity for me to talk about the sketches I did for Sun's team in RWBY: Remnants some time ago. They won't be appearing for a super long time, but I might as well talk about them now.

Here, I renamed them as Team SNSD (pronounced "Sunset"), with Sun Wukong, Neptune Vasilias, Sage Ayana and Scarlet David. (yes, I am aware there is a K-pop group with the same name, the synchronicity is not lost on me) They're still based on their original allusions as I wanted to work within the constraints of canon here, but the full Journey team may be too good to pass up, so I'll consider coming back in the future to tackle it.

People have always been divided on Team SSSN's name, with many preferring to rename them as SSNS ("Seasons"). I do get it - Team SSSN ("Sun") has that kind of dumb, corny "how do you spell?" vibe that matches a team of himbos. But I think having three S's for one word is just going a step too far into... just plain dumb.

Sun is pretty much the same here, but I decided to dial back towards his Asian features and grey eyes - though they're black here cause I like black eyes too. I also added the Monkey's King's famous golden headband, the jǐn gū zhòu, around his neck.

Neptune is pretty much the same here - honestly I really like his original design and think it's one of those "if it ain't broke don't fix it" situations - but I do want to redesign him more in the future to better reflect his allusion as Poseidon.

For Scarlet, I wanted to lean more into their "pirate king" vibe and androgynous appearance, so of course the coat-cape slung over the shoulders is a must. I also wanted to change their Semblance into something similar to their canon one but... not boring.

Instead of just gliding, Scarlet can either control air currents (and I do mean that in a very loose, fantasy way) or affect the trajectory of any moving object their Aura recently comes into contact with. This Semblance is called Pixie Dust, and instead of a gun and cutlass, Scarlet wields two guns, either named Hook and Darling like in canon... or Faith and Trust (geddit). They can use this Semblance to fly, and infuse their bullets with their Semblance when loading them to cause them to curve in midair when fired. Yes, basically like that one movie, Wanted.

People who don't like physics breaking in live action movies hated the bullet curving mechanic, but I think it'd be a perfect fit in RWBY's universe. It adds a much-needed cool factor, and picturing Scarlet engraving smug comments and poetic farewells onto their bullets like lethal fortune cookies injects an element of charisma and playfulness to what I think is a really underutilised character, and one based on Peter Pan no less.

Now for Sage, he had a very ambiguous allusion. Some say he was based on an Aesop fable, and others on Hindu mythology.

Glad to know Miles Luna doesn't know the allusion to one of his own characters, especially knowing that SSSN is one of the earliest teams designed for RWBY, predating JNPR. But sure, let's give him the benefit of the doubt like we always do for CRWBY. /s

Given that this was so ambiguous and he also had no Semblance, I decided to take some liberties with Sage, and given his surname and appearance, I decided to look to Hindu mythology for Sage's allusion - a really cool but unexplored source of inspiration in RWBY. I was looking at some famous warriors and gods of myth like Arjuna, but I eventually settled on Kartikeya.

Kartikeya is the Hindu god of war. Known for riding a peacock and sometimes depicted having six heads, he also wields a spear with a leaf-shaped blade called a vel. In other countries he is named Murugan, and has a famous statue of him in Malaysia's Batu Caves.

I've redesigned Sage's clothes to more reflect Indian fashion (albeit a fantasy version of such) and with peacock feather motifs on his collar and chest. Sage here also fights with this spear instead of a greatsword, which you can see him holding in the sketch. His Semblance, Sanmukha ("Six-faced"), allows him to see in six different directions at once, having total 360° vision around himself. This vision can also pierce solid objects within a certain range.

While not immensely powerful by itself, Sage uses this to gain an almost unparalleled martial prowess, spatial awareness and foresight in combat, reflecting the god of war's own wisdom and skill. While I do really like the Roman numeral tattoos on his neck, I was also considering using Sanskrit or Tamil script - I should try that next time I go back to his design.

So yeah, that's Team SNSD from me! I'm pretty attached to Indian Sage, but next time I come back to them I want to take a shot at basing them after Tripitaka, Zhu Bajie (Pigsy) and Sha Wujing (Sandy) from Journey. I also need to be sure actual Hindu people are fine with him, since Kartikeya is still a widely-worshipped god in current times unlike Thor or Poseidon, so I hoped this portrayal of Sage as alluding to him is respectful enough.

[frostwindwaltz]

the dawn and dandelion 🌻🍃

[fiddlepickdouglas]

Viva Las Vegas, Pt. 5 - The Stratosphere

Summary: Sunset Curve Alive AU, Willex, where will they go?, 2.7k

@trevor-wilson-covington​ is the bestie who makes these lovely edits, we stan supportive friends

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

“So, I was thinking,” Luke was saying to Julie once everyone was back in the green room, chatting lightly as they packed up their gear. “Maybe I could visit your mom in the hospital and play some songs for her. Cheer her up, you know?”

Julie looked so touched. Willie still didn’t know their whole story, but they seemed like a good fit. He had offered to help Alex load up his drums, but apparently there were people paid to do that here. Alex was just supervising it because he wanted to make sure they were handled right. It was a pity this place was full of techs and ushers and security because it was so tempting for Willie to try a few tricks on his board in there.

He’d finally gotten a proper introduction to everyone, and it turned out that all of Alex’s friends were great. The guys were all super chill, and he couldn’t thank Julie and Flynn enough for letting him be there to begin with. They seemed almost like a family. If he didn’t think about it too long, then he could ignore how badly he wanted to stay around all of them for as long as he could. Willie couldn’t remember anywhere that had felt so warm and open. He ran his fingers over the new bandage that he’d gotten on his hand.

Alex sat beside him, gear all stashed away.

“So, what’s your plan?” he asked.

“It’s a surprise,” Willie teased. “But it’s close.”

Alex looked around the room and then back at him with wonder in his eyes, raising the corners of his lips.

“Just the two of us though,” Willie added.

“Of course,” Alex nodded, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

“Hey, guys,” Luke spoke to the entire room. Flynn, Reggie, and Bobby stopped the silly hand clapping game they were in the middle of and all turned their heads to face him.

“Julie and I just came up with a super cool plan,” Luke continued. Julie stood with him, and Luke immediately stood back to let her speak.

“I told you guys that my mom’s cancer is back. She’s given a lot to me, and I don’t think I could ever give back everything. But it would be really neat if we all gave her a private mini concert.”

Cheers went around the room, making Julie beam with happiness.

“I know it’s short notice,” she went on. “But I want to try to do it once we’re all back in California.”

“But what about your shows in the next couple of days?” Flynn questioned.

“I’m gonna see if I can reschedule them. I know it isn’t an ideal thing to do but with my mom’s condition, I’ve gotta do what I can.”

Willie sat quietly. He would’ve been happy to be involved, but was too aware that he was staying here in Vegas. That same feeling of wrongness crept along his skin, making him fold his arms and rub his thumb where it rested. He wasn’t sure when he’d picked up the habit, but he was doing it a lot more often recently.

“Uh…” he started. “I’m gonna catch up with you guys later, if that's okay.” He glanced over at Willie in a subtle but giddy manner.

The group finished discussing plans about getting together for a quick practice and what kind of songs they would do for Julie’s mom. When Willie suggested Yellow Submarine, Alex advocated for it as well, and he was happy to have made at least some contribution to their ideas. Once all that was put together, everyone got ready to go their separate ways. All the guys shuffled toward their van and Alex hung behind for a moment.

The guys all looked mildly surprised, but ultimately shrugged.

“Catch you later, Alex,” Luke said, giving him a wink. Reggie was singing Yellow Submarine under his breath as they drove away, to which Willie giggled quietly.

“You ready?” he turned to Alex, noticing his hands were free from clutching the strap of his fanny pack this time.

“I guess I am,” Alex said, smiling through his nerves.

Willie took his hand tightly and carried his board with the other. Alex's smile only grew wider as they hurried out to the street. The goofy jerking between their hands only made them squeeze harder to keep contact. He could hear the delighted chuckle being released behind him as he guided Alex across the city. He felt his lungs let forth a youthful yell from his throat, and he felt like Peter Pan crowing as he flew through the stars.

People darted out of their way as they rushed onward. Willie eventually saw his target, the Stratosphere, and didn't even bother pausing before he pulled Alex through the entrance. The elevator was just being emptied and before anyone could stop them, he tugged Alex inside and pressed the buttons to get them to the highest floor. The doors shut and they felt the jolt of being lifted from the ground pull them downward.

"Aren't we supposed to pay for tickets?" Alex panted, laughing between breaths.

Willie, also doubled over in laughter, just shook his head.

"Capitalism sucks, man! Don't buy into it!"

Alex only wheezed, leaning into the wall for support. Eventually, they both sat on the floor and after a few more bouts of laughter were able to calm down and breathe normally.

"When you said you had your ways I didn't know you literally meant you could just walk in anywhere," Alex thought aloud.

"The concert was luck," Willie smiled. "Here, it's just practice."

Alex shook his head incredulously. They both sighed, feeling that strange tension that had been there back in the diner, except Willie felt it in his fingertips. He eyed Alex’s hand lying inches away, and imagined himself reaching through and lacing their fingers together.

"How's that relaxing going, by the way?" he wondered.

"Hard to tell with you around," Alex stated, sarcasm not to be missed.

"I'll take the compliment."

Their long ride inside the elevator was near the end, and they stood up as the numbers got closer. Willie felt Alex's pinkie reach for his and he was happily surprised at the feeling of skin twining with skin. It was like they didn’t have to say anything - they just felt the same things. The door opened to the fresh evening breeze and revealed the wonderful sight before them.

"Whoa," Alex breathed, immediately drawn to the view on the observation deck. The lights from below sparkled in his eyes and Willie followed as they came right up to the railing. Both of them sat in awed silence, watching everything blink and glitter beneath them. The mountains in the distance bordered everything in a gentle, majestic manner. Willie had been up here so many times and somehow never noticed the odd sense of being folded in angels' wings before.

“I’ve been an idiot,” Alex started saying. Willie turned his head in confusion. Their hands slipped apart as Alex began gesturing to emphasize his words. “I’ve been thinking all day about how everything goes wrong and expecting everything to go wrong. I haven’t been enjoying anything nearly as much as I should be right now.”

Willie didn’t reply just yet. He just looked at Alex, watching how tense he was still, almost as if he could see the lion in the cage inside his head. All he wanted was to set it free. He looked around, and while there were a couple people on the other side of the observation deck, they seemed likely to just take pictures and then head back down.

“You know what I love about being up here besides the view?” he asked Alex.

“What?”

Willie gripped the railing as hard as he could, took in a deep breath, and screamed out into the darkness. Alex looked around nervously, but only watched the other people on the deck make their way back to the elevator.

“You gotta try it,” Willie urged.

Alex braced himself against the barrier and gave a nice little yelp.

“Oh, are you a puppy up for adoption?” Willie joked, tugging on Alex’s jacket. “Your whole body needs to let go.”

Alex looked back at him with an intense focus, and then turned back to the railing. Filling his lungs to the brim, he yelled viciously over the top of it. Willie joined him and they both staggered between screaming and taking moments to breathe. Something about it said words beyond what they had spoken. Willie heard a unique sort of agony as Alex belted everything to the night. He wondered if his pain came through as well.

Alex finally sighed as he finished his last shout and then looked up at the sky and closed his eyes.

“I did enjoy that,” he said. “Thank you.” He dropped his posture and Willie smiled at seeing him finally loosen up.

“Didn’t know you had so much pent up rage,” he commented.

“I guess I didn’t either,” Alex said, chuckling darkly. He sat on the ground and looked up at Willie to follow suit. Taking a seat across from him, Willie eyed him curiously.

“Now what?” he asked.

“Staring contest,” Alex said plainly.

Unfortunately, Willie blinked immediately. Probably ten times in succession, actually. This time, Alex got to laugh.

“Okay, not an actual staring contest,” he said. “ But I’ve tried this with all the guys in the band. We look into each other’s eyes for a few minutes, no speaking, and we just....know each other better. Bobby’s the one who started it.”

Willie only nodded as they got into comfortable positions before locking eyes. He tried to silence any impulses for his mind to focus on anything else and channeled everything into looking at Alex. Even in the dim light, he picked up the green color staring back at him. The stillness outside rivaled the storm within them.

Slowly, the storm softened into waves of caring kindness. They were powerful, but low, as if Willie were wading in shallow water and letting them crash over him. Each wake broke upon him in just the way he wanted to collide with them. This wasn’t a tide where he would get lost in the danger of the deep. The current was pushing him back to the shore, toward safe ground. 

The image in his mind suddenly morphed, and he was transported from calming waves to a rickety road. Fields passed by as he found himself looking out a window. His vision steered to his left, and an older man with a jovial smile sat at the wheel, turning to him as if they’d been passing jokes between them. The man’s familiar laugh echoed in his head.

 Absent-mindedly, Willie grabbed Alex’s hand. Pulled out of his trance, Alex looked at him with concern.

“I just remembered something,” Willie said, sounding like he’d received divine communication. It almost felt like he had. That image was supposed to be locked away, he’d been told. Never to be known again.

“What, like you left the stove on or something?” Alex asked in confusion.

Willie shook his head seriously. His hand was still squeezing Alex’s but he couldn’t get it to loosen its grip. It wasn’t because the memory had scared him, but fear was present anyway.

“No.” His eyes had trouble focusing on Alex’s face, now. “I think I remembered my dad. Like we were driving together. I remembered him.”

Alex dipped his head lower as he tried to figure out what Willie meant.

Willie bit his lip and looked at him apprehensively. This wasn’t the intended topic of discussion tonight. It wasn’t a subject he was usually allowed to speak of to begin with. He opened his mouth and clamped it shut, and then opened it again.

“I have retrograde amnesia,” he confessed.

Alex’s jaw slacked and hung open for a minute. Willie wasn’t sure how long he could handle this gorgeous boy blinking at him in disbelief before Alex closed it again.

“Oh my god, Willie,” he started, still sounding unsure but remaining gentle.

“I’m sorry, that’s sort of a really big thing to just drop on somebody,” Willie started.

“No, no, you don’t need to be sorry,” Alex soothed. “But, oh my god, you just remembered something.”

Willie ran his hands through his hair and took a deep breath.

“Yeah… I did,” he said, just realizing the significance of that himself. His past wasn’t entirely under lock and key. That...brought a lot of emotions with it.

“Wait, so how long have you been like this?” Alex asked.

“About a year and a half,” Willie told him solemnly. “Caleb told me I was hit by a car when I was out skating. I even have a scar.” He lifted his hair and turned his head so Alex could get a look. Alex grimaced and shook his head, clearly not liking the visual he’d received in his mind.

“You’re lucky you’re not dead,” he said.

“Yeah, Caleb said that too.”

“Wait, who’s Caleb?” Alex blurted.

“Oh,” Willie looked downcast. “He’s my legal guardian. And my boss. You saw him this morning, remember?”

“That’s your legal guardian?” Alex said, sounding slightly upset. “Guy gave me the creeps.”

“That’s fair,” Alex said, sounding a little unconvinced of his own statement. He sat quietly for a minute. Willie studied him, worried about how he would respond next. Any fun had been sucked out of the air due to his own personal business.

“Yeah, well,” Willie shrugged. “He does that. But, what can I do, you know?”

“So, for the past year and a half,” Alex started. “You’ve had nobody except your boss?”

Wow, that hit him right in between the eyes. Willie hadn’t actually considered that before. He blinked momentarily and then looked directly into Alex’s eyes as pain slowly took over. Then hot tears welled up, causing him to look away.

“I guess not,” he said quietly, his voice already trembling. Before he could huddle into a little ball, Alex’s arms were around him, pressing his head to his chest. Heaving a sigh, he let the tears fall as quietly as he dared to be. His hand crept up to hold onto Alex’s shoulder and gripped tightly. A funny weight was felt on the top of his head, and he realized Alex was running his fingers through his hair. It was so soothing, so...sweet. Willie didn’t realize that was something he missed from his many forgotten memories.

Soon, he straightened up and wiped his eyes.

“Thank you,” he said to Alex, knowing he couldn’t possibly convey how grateful he truly was.

“Of course,” Alex assured him, still gazing upon him tenderly.

“I guess I killed the mood, huh?” Willie attempted to joke. Alex simply smirked and shook his head.

“For what it’s worth, I was totally lost in your eyes, so I needed to come back to reality.”

Willie couldn’t help but smile, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

“That was for free,” he said, already getting back into step with his sense of humor. “I charge everyone else.”

Alex quietly entered the hotel and slipped into the door of their room. The guys had thankfully left it ajar so he wouldn’t be locked out. Luke was already lightly snoring on the couch, and he saw that Reggie and Bobby had both taken the larger bed. Carefully pulling his fanny pack over his head and setting it on the side table, he kicked off his shoes.

“Hey, Alex,” he heard Reggie whispering. Dammit. “How’d it go?”

The entire night replayed on fast forward in his mind, and he couldn’t get over the beauty of it all. The weight of it all.

“It was good, Reg,” he whispered back. He quickly changed and climbed into the bed that came down from the wall. Too many thoughts and feelings swirled in his mind like a cajun soup. Willie was amazing. There was nothing else to it except smaller details that attested to the same fact. Today had been all he would have of him, though. His mind paused on that thought as silence filled his ears.

“Did you kiss him?” Reggie whispered out of the blue in curiosity.

“Hey, bigger spoon,” Bobby mumbled groggily. “Be quiet.”

Alex didn’t answer, but smiled quietly to himself. He should have kissed him.

[xopinkmilk18xo]

Get to know me!

1. Name

Courtney Jane Smith

2. Nationality

Australian

3. Age

18

4. Birthday

11th December 2001

5. Zodiac sign (or your primal zodiac sign)

Sagittarius / Ophiuchus

6. Gender

Female

7. Sexuality

Bisexual💙💖💜

8. Your looks (add a picture or describe yourself)

Ew I know

9. What do you/did you study?

I will be going on to study Children’s Nursing at University but in school I studied Sociology, Photography and Childcare

10. What’s your current job like?/What job would you like to have?

I currently hold a part time job at my local corner shop, but will hopefully end up with a job as a children’s nurse or something to do with childcare:)

-

11. Your birth order

Aaron, Charlotte, Abbey, Me:), Lacey

(I think that is what this means)

12. How many siblings do you have?

4

13. Do you have good relations with your family?

Yes but not with my first oldest sister

14. How many friends do you have?

Like 2 lol

15. Your relationship status

Taken🥰

16. What do you look for in a SO?

Good personality, being good looking helps (dont want to date a troll u know) and well I guess that’s it really

17. Do you have a crush?

Yes on my boyfriend

18. When did you have your first kiss?

When I was 14

19. Do you prefer serious and meaningful relationships or casual dating/one night stands?

Serious and meaningful

20. What are your deal breakers?

I’m not really sure:/

-

21. How was your day?

It was okay, could’ve been better but overall it was meh

22. Favourite food & drink

I love pasta like I could marry pasta haha. And my favourite drink is probably either fresh orange juice or something fizzy

23. What position do you sleep in?

On my side, hugging my pillow with my leg out as if it’s straddling someone (I’m lonely, my boyfriend needs to stay over at some point)

24. What was your last dream about?

I honestly wish I could remember but they are so fucking crazy right now

25. Your fears

Spiders, snakes, heights, large crowds, death (morbid I know) and being lonely:(

26. Your dreams

To travel the world with my baby🥺 as well as buy my own house, get my dream career, get married and have babies (basic I know but this is what I want in life and will feel so lucky and blessed if this happens)

27. Your goals

Same as the above I guess? To travel the world with the loml, become a child nurse, get my dream house then get married, have babies and live a happy long life:)

28. Any pets?

Yes! A cat called Binka and a dog called Shiro (Japanese for White as he is a white Japanese Akita)

29. What are your hobbies?

Cooking, baking, cleaning (weird I know), singing, dancing and sleeping haha

30. Any cool places in your area?

Um, I mean I live about 30 minutes from the beach and it has a “hidden cave” (it’s quite easy to spot if you know where it is) that I go to with a few friends some nights and watch the sunset. So that’s pretty cool

31. What was your last awkward situation?

They happen so often I don’t even know which one to write about I’m such an awkward person lol

32. What is your last regret?

I don’t know really

33. Language/s you can speak

I can speak Italian, Spanish, Russian and some French

34. Do you believe in astrological stuff? (Zodiac, tarot, etc.)

To a certain extent, yes

35. Have any quirks?

Um I’m not sure?

36. Your pet peeves

I have so many but my BIGGEST pet peeve is the people who like to one-up a situation so I have a friend like this but she’s like one of my only friends so I don’t want to say anything woops but for example I could say to her “I only got 5 hours sleep” she would then turn around and be like “oh well I went to bed at 11 and woke up at 3am and couldn’t sleep” it’s like okay cool but stop trying to one up me thank u bye

37. Ideal vacation

DisneyWorld or Bora Bora (two complete different places I know but I’ve been to both many times and they’re both amazing)

38. Any scars?

I have a scar on my chin from when I hit it on the stair rail when I was a child and I have a surgery scar from when I had my appendix removed

39. What does your last text message say?

It’s me texting my email to my boyfriend because he needed it for something (kinda personal nothing bad tho)

40. Last 5 things from your search history

Majority of it right now is me googling Birthday presents for a family member as well as flight times because I was curious what the time from LA to Texas was haha

41. What’s your [device] background?

Lock screen is me and my boyfriend and my home screen is a flower picture I took

42. What do you daydream about?

A lot of different things, it all depends on how I’m feeling

43. Describe your dream home

Something small and quaint yet modern and big enough to raise a big family

44. What’s your religion/Your thought about religion

I have nothing against religion and what people believe in. I personally am not religious but I do believe in something. Not God or Jesus but I believe that something like that HAS to exists (sorry if I offended anyone I really did not mean to:/)

45. Your personality type

Really shy and quiet (social anxiety tings😚dont worry I have actually been diagnosed) but ince you get to know me I come out of my shell a bit more

46. The most dangerous thing you’ve done

Went sky diving (it was terrifying)

47. Are you happy with your current life?

Yes but no

48. Some things you’ve tried in your life

I don’t really know how the hell to answer this question I’m sorry🥺

-

49. What does your wardrobe consist of?

A lot of different colours but I wear mainly grey and black clothes hehe

50. Favourite colour to wear?

Black or grey🤪

51. How would you describe your style?

I don’t really know, definitely not trendy I can tell you that but all the styles I want to try I just KNOW will look bad on me

52. Are you happy with your current looks?

Not really no lol😚✌🏼

53. If you could change/add something to your appearance - impossible or not - what would it be?

I honestly would change my entire face, especially my nose, if it was smaller I’d feel slightly better about my appearance (nothing against big noses lol I just don’t like mine)

54. Any tattoos or piercings?

I had my ears and nose pierced but took them out and just forgot to put them back in and now the holes have sorta closed up.

I then also have a small turtle on my ankle - for a close friend (still alive lol but it’s just a nice thing to have) and I have plans to get a few more just need to decided when I want them because I keep chickening out

55. Do you get complimented often?

Yes sorta but only by my boyfriend

56. Favourite aesthetic?

I’m not sure?

57. A popular trend that you dislike

I’m not really aware of any popular trends as of right now tbh

-

58. Songs you’re currently obsessed with?

Adore You by Harry Styles and for some reason Feel so Close by Calvin Harris

59. Song you normally wouldn’t admit you like.

Mr Brightside - I hate the song (dont attack me pls) but it lowkey, high key is a BOP

60. Favourite genre?

Mainly throwback songs so I guess pop songs? Tbh my genre of music is all over the place

61. Favourite artist/band/genre?

I love 5 Seconds of Summer and One Direction but that’s it really

62. Hated popular songs/artists?

I HATE Dance Monkey and High Hopes (they get on my nerves so much idk why)

63. Put your music on shuffle and list first 5

September - Earth Wind & Fire

Truth Hurts - Lizzo

Jealous - Labrinth

Bad Romance - Halestorm (such a bop)

Break Free - Ariana Grande

64. Can you sing or play any instruments?

I can sing, I also play piano and guitar (strings have broken though and so haven’t played in a while)

65. Do you like karaoke?

I LOVE karaoke

66. Own any albums?

Yes, mainly 5SOS and One Direction haha

67. Do you listen to radio? What stations?

Sometimes, no particular station as I only listen to it to fill in the silence in certain situations

-

68. Favourite movie/series?

I love the Frozen films but also the Harry Potter films sooooo much

69. Favourite genre of movies/books/etc

I don’t really have a favourite tbh

70. Your fictional crush/es

I know it’s typical but I have the biggest crush on Harry Potter lol

71. Which fictional character is you?

I don’t know?

72. Are you a shipper? List your otps, if so

No not really

73. Favourite greek god?

I don’t have a favourite Greek god but I like Athena purely because I like the name haha

74. A legend from where you live that you like

I don’t really know of any legends however there is a myth that a Panther is on the loose in the Blue Mountains

75. Do you like art? What’s your favourite work or artist?

I like to look at art and admire it however I do not have a favourite artist or anything like that

76. Can you share your other social media?

I sure can:)

Twitter       Instagram      Wattpad

Snapchat - cjmushmush (you don’t have to add it and also don’t question the name I was 11)

77. Favourite youtubers?

Shane Dawson, Ryland Adams, Morgan Adams, Jeffree Star and The Dolan Twins

78. Favourite platform?

I am obsessed with Tik Tok so I’d say that’s probs my fave

79. How much time do you spend on the internet?

Far too much I can tell you that

80. What video games have you played? Which one’s your favourite?

I used to play minecraft and now all I do is play Sims 3 and 4 which are my absolute faves

81. Your favourite books (manga also counts)

I don’t really have any

82. Do you play board/card games?

Yes but not very often

83. Have you ever been to a night marathon in cinema?

No I didn’t even know that was a thing

84. Favourite holiday

I LOVE CHRISTMAS SO MUCH❤️💚❤️💚

85. Are you into dramas?

Yes

-

86. Would you use death note, if you had one?

I don’t know what a death note is?

87. What changes would you make in the world, no matter how impossible, if you had the power to?

I wouldn’t choose world peace because then everything would be the same and it would be boring but if I had the power I would make sure everyone had a stable home with at least hot clean water and a nice warm bed, as well as curing world hunger because I’m nice like that

88. Could you survive a zombie apocalypse?

Probably not

89. If you had to be turned into a paranormal being, what would it be?

A ghost

90. What would you want to happen to you after your death?

Become a ghost haha

91. If you had to change your name, what would be your pick?

Anything but Courtney - my name was almost Octavia so that would also be out of the question

92. Who would you switch your life with for a week?

So many people I’d love to do this with so I’m not sure

93. Pick an emoji to be your tattoo

🦥 (only because I love sloths)

94. Write 3 things about yourself - only one of them must be true

(these are the most random things I’m sorry)

I was born in the UK (not true, born in Sydney)

I am not single (True, I am in a relationship:))

I love avocado (I actually DESPISE IT)

-

95. Cold or hot?

Cold because that can = snuggles duh

96. Be a hero or be a villain?

Be a villain because I hate the attention (hero would probs get a lot of attention) and everyone hates me anyway lol

97. Sing everything you want to say or rhyme?

Probably sing everything considering I do that a lot anyway

98. Shapeshifting or controlling time?

Control time because I’d go back to the past a change some things then go back to today so I can still be with my boyfriend❤️

99. Be immortal or be immune to everything aside from natural death?

Be immortal that would be pretty fun

100. ….. or …..?

What does this one even mean?

[pemini]

Masked | Mark Lee

「 every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him 」

⇢ Word count: 3,103

⇢ Genre: fluff, comedy, some angst

⇢ Warnings: swearing, fire

⇢ Pairing: Spiderman!Mark x reader

You have always been a terrible cook. Your mother's failed attempts to teach you how to cook rice back when you were thirteen brought that to light. The first time, the rice burnt to literal ashes, and the next, it was barely edible. At sixteen, you tried baking a cake for your best friend Donghyuck’s birthday, only to end up being seconds away from burning your house down. It was no surprise to anyone, but yourself, when one of your culinary endeavors really did result in flames. It was in your and Donghyuck’s shared apartment, at the age of nineteen.

You and Donghyuck had known each other since you were born. The two of you proudly boasted that fact with the framed pictures of both of you in diapers, bathing in the same tub, celebrating your birthdays together and graduating highschool in the same class all placed around your apartment and hung up on your walls. In first grade, Donghyuck became friends with Mark, resulting in great jealousy on your part, because Mark was “stealing” your best friend. That problem solved itself, and the three of you became inseparable. Mark made frequent appearances in the pictures around the house, as well as your apartment itself, since he spent more time in it than in his own. Despite your apartment being his second home, he refused to live with you and Donghyuck, partly because you were both extremely messy and loud, but also because he knew he would “get sick of you” if he saw you that frequently. At least, that’s what his excuse was.

Mark was an extremely busy nineteen year old. In fact, you would argue that he’s too busy for a nineteen year old. With him being a biochemistry major, it was no surprise. His apartment was littered with notes and diagrams and he rarely left his home without at least one of his textbooks, in case he had some time to do some extra revision. On top of all the studying, he always seemed to be at the gym. It was almost as if his own home was a pit stop between school, the gym and you and Donghyuck’s apartment. It was never a surprise when he cancelled on study sessions and arcade hangouts last minute, at some point you stopped asking why and simply blamed it on his busy schedule.

It was just past sunset when you decided to bake cupcakes, for no particular reason but sheer boredom. Donghyuck was holed up in his bedroom playing video games and Mark was too busy to come over, leaving you to entertain yourself. You looked up a recipe online, making sure to add “for beginners” at the end of the search. After all, you weren’t completely unaware of your talent for messing up your cooking- but, you were optimistic. Hence, you choosing to bake for fun in the first place. Two hours of “perfecting” the (awfully clumpy) batter later, the tray went into the oven. You patted yourself on the back for your efforts, and smiled at the thought of the perfect cupcakes that you would rub in Mark and Donghyuck’s faces in half an hour. Five minutes later, you were sprawled out on the couch, fast asleep. Not long after, your slumber was interrupted by Donghyuck’s frantic screams and the deafening sound of the fire alarm. The kitchen was in flames. Donghyuck was emptying water bottles on the growing fire while shouting at someone on the phone. He was a great multitasker.

“That dumbass tried baking and fell asleep, who the fuck does that? She hasn’t even woken up.” You bolted up from the comfort of the couch, now in complete panic, and began running around the two bedroom apartment in search for a fire extinguisher. You could hear Donghyuck’s obnoxious voice over the blaring fire alarm and the sound of the approaching firetrucks, which did not help your case.

“I am literally going to burn to death because I’m roommates with a crackhead who can’t cook, I’m going to die, Mark, this is how I die-“ In the midst of his rant and water bottle emptying, his sleeve caught on fire. His voice had already risen up three octaves and his water bottle supply was proving useless, and now the poor boy was on fire. “Y/n- Oh my God, where the fuck are you?”

“I found the fire extinguisher, I’m coming- fuck, wait-“ You screamed back, scrambling into the kitchen and tripping over your own feet. You looked up to see Donghyuck flailing around wildly, which would’ve made for great entertainment if you weren’t trapped in an oven.

“Hurry up I’m on fire I’m burning I’m going to die- Mark! He hung up, I’m going to die alone-“ Just as you began extinguish him, you heard the sound of shattering glass, followed by the sound of the door being busted open as firefighters stomped into your apartment.

You froze in place, the orders barked by the firefighters barely processed in your mind, the smoke settling into your lungs and your watering eyes proved to be too much of a distraction. Your breathing had long sped up, shortened and frantic, you could barely see your own hands amidst the smoke. Just as you were about to break into full panic, you felt a pair of steady arms wrap around your waist. Mere seconds later, you were lifted off of the ground in someone’s arms, with your cheek flush against their chest. You were faced with New York City’s landscape, the buildings that towered over you were now at face level. The night was no darker than usual; not quite moonlit, yet not as artificial as it seemed to be. For a second you could see the silhouettes of strangers inside the buildings surrounding you, the potential wonder of “can they see me to?” Had no time to be fulfilled, as you closed your eyes and screamed as if it would change the fact that you were already midair. You were dangling between buildings in the strangers arms, not flying, just dangling. You held your savior closer, mumbling prayers for safety.

“You okay?” The male chuckled. His laugh reverberated through his chest, eliciting chills in your entire body. The familiarity of his voice silenced you. It was warm; soothing, almost making you forget about your situation. You finally took a moment to breathe before opening her eyes, only to be greeted by a vibrant mask.

“What the fuck,” You exhaled, studying the mask’s large white eyes and its web detailing. “you’re Spiderman?”

“Yes, I’m Spiderman.” He giggled. “And you are?”

“I am a big fan.” You let out a clumsy combination of a sigh and a giggle, “and you’re Spiderman.”

“Yes, I think we’ve already gone through that.” Just as those words left his lips, the wind stopped blowing through your hair and the comforting pressure of his arms around your waist ceases. He gently placed you back on the ground, and although you failed to notice the close proximity, you were mere centimeters apart and his hand lay resting on your waist. You forgot your arms still laying on his shoulders with your fingers tangled behind his neck, too distracted by the warmth of his body and the faint outline of the eyes behind the mask. As well as the shock of being meters above the ground and caught in a fire minutes earlier.

“What the fuck?” Donghyuck’s voice snapped you out of your daze. The hand on your hip suddenly felt heavy, as well as your newfound awareness of your arms around the superhero’s neck. Both of you hastily pulled your hands away from each other, placing them awkwardly at your sides as you turned to Donghyuck. “So, you’re telling me that the Spiderman had the time to save you out of a burning building, but I was left to burn to death?” He pointed his finger accusingly, first at you, then Spiderman, and then placed it solemnly on his chest. You reminded yourself not to roll your eyes- just to save yourself from another influx of drama.

“I have two hands, and I doubt you would’ve enjoyed hanging onto my leg.” He laughed, stretching his arms as he spoke. “Besides, you look fine!” The way his shoulders shook when he laughed could’ve given you deja vu. His movements, his scent and the wight of his arms that were once around you formed into an unknown syllable at the tip of your tongue. It was as if you’ve collected every puzzle piece, yet couldn’t fit any of the pieces together.

“Sure, whatever. I’m gonna go call Mark so he can pick us up. We’re staying over at his place tonight.” Donghyuck said. He looked you up and down, smirking to himself. “Too bad you can’t get changed.” Your eyes widened the second you looked down at what you were wearing. Your oversized 2011 Justin Bieber t-shirt with matching purple pajama bottoms and crocs were your go to stay in outfit. In your defense, you could have never predicted that your kitchen would light on fire and that Spiderman would break in and save you. Yet in that moment, you still deeply regretted buying those pajamas back in 2011.

Much to your discontent, Spiderman directed his attention to your clothing as well, laughing. “I know I just saved you out of a burning building and all, but are you really wearing crocs?”

You scoffed, lightly pushing his chest. “They’re comfortable! You’re wearing spandex.”

Just as he was about to reply, the song Love Yourself by Justin Bieber started playing. Right from his spandex pocket. Spiderman glanced at you briefly before he took the phone out of his pocket, reluctantly answering the phone call. The syllable caught in your tongue turned to a word, the puzzle pieces slowly clicking together. You could hear Donghyuck’s voice on the other end, talking about staying over for the night.

“Mark?” He turned to you at the mention of the name, telling Donghyuck he would be on his way and ending the call. His head was hung low as he took a few steps closer to you.

“That’s me.” His replied. The confidence that radiated off of him ceased, instead replaced by tense shoulders and fidgeting fingers. “Can we talk somewhere else?”

The walk to wherever Mark was taking you was silent, an unusual contrast to almost every moment you spent together. Mark was in a constant fit of giggles over something you said or did, and vice versa. Every conversation you had led to another, and you were both convinced the you would never run out of things to talk about. Every word between you was already said, except for three words you kept dear to yourself. Mark meant a lot to you, more than you would like to admit. At some point, you considered it almost embarrassing how big of a role he played in your life. The situation in which you met was nearly as awkward as this one- the cliche ‘guy spills coffee on a girl in a café, promises to make it up to her, they end up as lovers’ trope- except, you were not lovers. Although, the line between best friends and lovers was terribly blurred in everyone else’s eyes, (especially Donghyuck’s, who never misses the little smile dancing on your lips when Mark says something stupid, or the way Mark’s eyes shine when you trips over your words.) neither of you noticed that there should have been something more in your story. The coffee spill should’ve lead to a date, which should’ve lead to a kiss, which should’ve lead to more. Alas, your story was never meant to be generic, and at the point you were at, there was no changing it.

Mark lead you into a secluded alleyway, pressing his back against the wall with a sigh. You stood in front of him, the past events replaying in your mind all to form a singular question. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I wanted to- I swear to God- there were so many times when I was alone with you and I just wanted to tell you but I- I couldn’t do it.” At that moment, everything about him screamed uncertainty. From the tapping of his foot and his fidgeting fingers, to his shaky voice. You’ve known Mark longer than you’ve really known yourself, yet you’ve never seen him like this- so insecure, so.. apprehensive. You could tell he had stressed about this exact moment millions of times before, that the outcome could break him. “I don’t want you to see me differently.”

“Mark, this doesn’t change how I see you- ” You paused, taking a moment to collect your thoughts. The same way this exact moment clouded his mind daily, it made home in your mind as well. Thoughts about the day you tell Mark how you feel were constant. They took place in a considerable amount of your daydreams, they intruded your less stressful thoughts while you conversed with Mark, and they occasionally popped up when you should have been focusing in class, only making it harder for you to pretend that you were fine with being “just friends”. In fact, the thought of you and Mark being nothing but friends, the thought of watching him fall in love with someone else, that thought clung onto your lungs like an iron fist and you were just about to run out of oxygen. “You’re my best friend. I don’t care if you’re half spider, or whatever. I just want to be there for you, can’t you see that? I do everything I can just to show you how much I care about you- how much I fucking love you- and it just feels like a waste, because you weren’t even honest with me. You hid half of your life from me, Mark, and it hurts.”

“You love me?” He barely whispered, his body went still, looking at you through his mask expectantly. The fist around your lungs tightened and you could feel your heart drop right beneath your feet. The silence that followed his question felt like an eternity, you could hear every flicker of the street lamps and every laugh from every stranger passing by the alleyway, yet it felt like it was just the two of you. To you, the world had stopped entirely and it lay in his hand. After he decided the silence dragged on long enough, he pushed himself off the wall and took a few gradual steps towards you. “Do you want to take it off?”

“What?” His question was, needless to say, unexpected and confusing, though somewhat unsurprising; Mark had a tendency of switching between one thing to another at pace that’s hard for the average person to keep up with. You repeated the question in your mind and your mouth went dry as you stared at the outline of his eyes, hands shaking. Mark reached out and put your hand in his, lifting it up to his cheek.

“Take the mask off, I mean.” He chuckled, yet you could practically sense his nerves from miles away, betraying his confident demeanor. With his assistance, you traced your fingertips down to the edge of his mask, right at his jaw, and carefully tugged it off of his head. That night, was when you saw him for the first time, really saw him for all that he is. And at that moment, he was doing anything at all, but you could’ve sworn that his eyes held all the stars you’ve ever seen. His disheveled hair, up in angles that would’ve made you laugh if it weren’t for the current situation framed his face perfectly, and it was like your hand had a mind of its own when you reached out to run your hand through it. The light sheen of sweat covering his face only made him look so much more angelic under the moonlight. And his lips, curled up into the little smile you’ve grown to love so much. You barely noticed his face inching closer to your own, too caught up in his eyes, his lips, him. Before you could remind yourself to breathe, after noticing your breath had been caught in your throat for the past minute, his eyes were closed and his lips were on yours and you knew you would never again worry about what should have been. Every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him with his arm around your waist and his hand placed your cheek, and you knew you have found your forever in the taste of his lips. He pulled away too soon.

“I love you too, y/n. I love you so, so much and I’m so sorry. I know I should face told you, I just- the thought of losing you was eating at me and I was so insecure and afraid and I am so sorry, please don’t be mad at me, I-” You cut his rambling off with a kiss, his wide eyes and furrows brows melting your heart, you could feel him smile into the kiss. You both broke into a fit of laughter mid way, starry eyes on each other with puffy lips, and he couldn’t help but cup your cheeks and smother you with kisses till you could barely breathe. You found heaven.

The too familiar tune of Love Yourself by Justin Bieber blared from his pocket once again. Your laughter died down, “Let’s go get Hyuck before he beats us up.” He said, taking hold of your hand and starting to lead you out of the alleyway.

“Mark, your mask.” You reminded him, only to earn a shrug and a “fuck it” in return.

“It’s okay, I’m going to tell Hyuck about it, too.”

“No, I mean there’s news reporters outside our apartment building, you really don’t want them to know you’re Spiderman.” You flicked his forehead lightly and handed him the mask. And with that, he quickly placed it back onto his head, and walked with you, hand in hand, into the city, and into your long awaited- not so generic- love story.

“As if I didn’t already know, it was obvious as fuck. I thought y/n would catch on sooner.”

“Come on, Hyuck, you had no clue, don’t lie!”

“Dude, I got you Spiderman socks on your birthday on purpose, I am Lee Donghyuck, I know everything.”

“Sure you do, what else do you know?”

“That the two of you are dating and haven’t told me yet.”

“What the fuck.”

[dwightkschrute]

In 2014 and 2015 I did a my year in review kind of thing where I, of course, reviewed it and accompanied it with a picture from that month. I somehow forgot to post 2016 (until now) and forgot to do it at all for 2017 but unfortunately, I am back with a really disappointing year. I was debating not putting myself through the legit pain of “reviewing” this year but I think of how I love going through my 2009-2010 posts and seeing how much I’ve grown so this is for you, successful and cooler future me.

2016 and 2017 were amazing but 2018 was my most promising year. My boyfriend and I were going to move in, I was going to start my dream job; everything was perfect. It definitely started out as one of the best years of my life! Then exactly halfway through the year everything changed and I was left having to pick up the pieces and completely restart, making it one of the worst years of my life.

I started January in Mexico, which was the best, but my family and I got home early in the month. I had quit my job the month before so I dedicated the entirety of this month to job hunting. Our friend (my bf’s bff who became mine and my brother’s bff early on)’s dad got a boat so it was like we got a boat too because despite the cold, we lived on it. (My boyfriend couldn’t go on the trip with us, which he was super bummed about (and that we had to spend like 10 days apart which was killer then), so he was the one to pick us up at the airport and he greeted me with a bouquet of flowers. Out of the many gifts/gestures he gave me, that was one of my favorites.)

February I started my amazing new job so life was back to 40 hour work weeks and not having much time for much else. I was always attached to the hip to my bf so almost every day after work entailed going out with him or having dinner with my family or his. That was my month. My favorite part of every February is Valentine’s Day and this one was as amazing as the rest. I don’t even have enough space (of the allotted space I give myself for each entry at least!) to describe that day. (My bf at our Valentine’s Day dinner. We finished our long day at this restaurant (so, so cool, once popular with Old Hollywood stars) on Hollywood Blvd and it was dreamy and romantic and amazing.) Oh man, I don’t have a lot of interesting things to say about March. Oh, my parents got Influenza (A/B/idk tbh), so it was two weeks of my brother, bf, and I taking care of them. My dad has a serious chronic disease so it was especially dangerous for him so it was a stressful time. Once we weren’t in hazmat suits anymore (no but really, we were gloved and double masked around them and kept them quarantined), I’d be at work or with my bf. I also started to get close with a co-worker, who I quickly became close friends with! (My bf’s two huskies. I’ve just loved that picture since I took it! I’ve never been loved by a dog more than the one in the back of this pic. Not even by my own! He has a special place in my heart.)

April was barbecues at my house or my bf’s, trying every brewery and bar around, hikes, bike rides, beach visits, baseball games, boat rides, late night cooking and baking. It was lots and lots of love and happiness and I would give absolutely anything to go back to those days. (My brother and bf grilling on Easter. This was a familiar scene, I have so many pictures of this exact scenario, yet looking at it just now made me so emotional! Stop! They’re just grilling!) May was so exciting! Very first day I got a new car! I was so happy! It was long overdue because my finicky, expensive Volkswagen had to go and I’d fallen in love with the new Honda Civic (I’ll admit I have basic taste but I don’t care!) so I finally bit the bullet and did it. This month my bf and I, after a long time of “oh wouldn’t it be nice!”, bit the bullet as well and decided to finally get serious about finding a place together. So the apartment search started, but we soon realized our home, Orange County, was super expensive. My bf, in that “ha ha jk but I’m down if you are” way, suggested we pick up and move to Oregon and I immediately agreed. It just felt right and despite us being the most careful and non-spontaneous people ever, we decided to do it! So we began to research, look for apartments but most importantly, jobs. (My car the day I took it home!)

Uhhhhhh, well, June hurts to think about! We went to visit Portland, where we decided we’d want to live because that’s where the jobs were, on a quick trip since it was strictly “business.” Portland was everything I imagined and more. We loved it and I think we loved playing house in our airbnb more than anything about the city. Back in LAX we came to the easy conclusion that though we lived Portland, that’d require a lot and for our first time moving out we’d like to stay close to home and above anything else, we just wanted to live together as soon as possible. We immediately started to look for places in LA, we spent the month apartment hunting, and towards the end of it, decided on one we really liked, one he begged me to please say yes to so we can move in already. I was so, so, so happy this month but what made me happier was seeing my bf, I swear, even happier than me. I seriously felt unstoppable and was beyond excited for our future. (I had a lot of Portland pictures to choose from but my bf and I liked this one because it reminded us of Always Sunny for some reason.)

In July, everything changed. To start, I left my job. I thought, new chapter in my life, new job coming, I’ll live really far, I should leave now. So I did. My last day was an emotional day because I loved my job so much and every single person I worked with. That very same day, my bf and I broke up. For unrelated reasons to my last day, to our moving in, to our relationship, etc. We had an amazing, amazing relationship but he has a lot of demons and issues/insecurities he has to deal with and conquer, and though I was aware and was there for him and would continue to be by his side no matter what, he decided that this was a battle he had to handle by himself and I figure before he got into a more committed situation. It didn’t have to happen, though. I hadn’t talked about the specifics of the breakup on my blog so  sorry for changing the mood of the post, but yeah, July happened and it felt like my world stopped. Really regret quitting my job now, huh? I was hit by two huge losses and changes right at the same time.  (I took this on my friend’s boat 20 tequila shots in, drunk and sad as fuck. Not to get fake deep but how sad. Literally on a boat, beautiful sunset, would rather die.)

August was a blur and I’m still not convinced I didn’t just dream it. God, alright, here we go, the rest of the year is a mess so get ready. I fell into a deep depression fast. It also didn’t help that my dad had to start getting radiation/infusions for his illness shortly after the breakup. I couldn’t believe how much my life had changed. I started dating someone else and then I dated another guy shortly after. I wanted to replace and/or forget and I really thought that’d be the solution. I was miserable when I was with them. I took absolutely any opportunity to get really drunk or high, and the opportunity came often so I spent most of my days desperately trying to not feel anything. The only time I’d feel okay was when I was extremely high and I couldn’t even think. Since I had a lot of savings for my out of state move, I had a lot of money to blow, which I did. I realized I even liked the feeling of the temporary “high” of spending a lot and receiving the stuff. I’d hang out with any friend who offered (out of boredom? loneliness?) and even ended up on a mess of a Vegas trip. Worst month ever. Maybe. (Here’s a positive! I like that bathing suit and my tiddie looks so round!)

When September came I realized two months had passed and all I had done was be a huge depressed mess. I no joke forgot about work. I just straight up forgot. I started to look for a new job, which hurt me so bad because I had to face the fact that it wouldn’t be my Cool LA Dream Job anymore. I stopped dating. Most importantly, I completely stopped drinking and smoking because it’d almost always make me sadder but also it scared me that I had no self control nor did I care. I saw a whole lot of my close friends and they, along with my immediate family, kept me afloat this month because time felt like it was going so fast. I couldn’t believe that at a blink of an eye it was night again and then a new day. Time had no mercy for me, please let me hold on. (Me at a baseball game. Tbh I’m looking at this thinking, did this really happen?)

October started out nice because my best friend of years, who I unfortunately had a falling out with three years ago, reached out to me. I’ll always give her all of the credit for doing that. I can’t begin to explain what this meant to me. It was a nice, bright shine of light that managed to shine through the dark clouds. Having my best friend is exactly what I needed. I’m a big believer in the universe acting in mysterious ways and though I had grown disappointed in its little surprise for me lately, this was the kind I always appreciate. I spent a good part of that month with her, catching up and doing things just like we did back then. It was like nothing had changed. That’s all I remember about this month, and a super fun Halloween! That day was probably one of the best days in months. (My best friend Rylee and me the first time seeing each other in 3 years. We’ve had our blogs for 8-9 years so please follow her for quality content)

November was rough. I was frustrated because surely things should had been better by then. I was still feeling so low, I was going to job interviews to no avail, I “relapsed” and had a high/drunk off my ass on a boat messy moment.. To make matters worse, I accidentally drove up on a cement divider in a parking lot and my airbags deploy, which is so expensive to fix, so my car was out of commission for a month. Then I got so sick and I rarely ever get a small cold. I seriously felt like I was cursed, even the smallest thing felt like an insult towards me. The one good thing is that since July I had been forcing myself to go to the gym five times a week. My mom said exercising was the only thing that’d help her feel that sweet release of seretonin, endorphins, dopamine, and all that good stuff when she was depressed so, though I enjoyed going to the gym before, I did it just for that reason alone. It worked and as another result I got like pretty fucking fit. Revenge body, you’re one of the few good things in my life right now. (I literally had no idea what to choose so I said fine, here’s a pic of the scene of the crime. Whatever.)

In December I turned 26. Which I hate, naturally. I went to a million more job interviews. I’m seriously so embarrassed to admit that but whatever, it’s the truth. (I have a degree, experience, and an awesome cover letter..I’ll keep blaming the curse!) What kept me sane was that we had different family members visiting from the very beginning of the month. Playing with an energetic, adorable baby kept me distracted and happy. Having so much company around also distracted me (slightly, but it helped!) from the fact that the holidays and my birthday would be quite different now. I’m one of those annoying Christmas lovers, usually at least. This year everything just happened and I didn’t care. But I survived December! (I don’t care. This is the appropriate representation of 2018 and how I feel at the end of it.)

Jesus if you’ve read all of this.. I’m sorry you had to read about the mess of my year but really more like the mess that is ME. Yknow those like “people my age I went to HS with vs me” memes? I seriously went from being that bitch with a good paying job, brand new car, a serious, great relationship with a promising future together (Like. We would color coordinate outfits! LMAO. We would have dinners with both of our families together. We were obsessed with each other. You’d roll your eyes if you saw any of this. I can’t get over how perfect we were, it’s hilarious what happened to us.) and then at the blink of an eye I went to not having absolutely any of that, casually dating (something I’d NEVER done) anyone who resembled my ex and sadly and drunkenly puking off the side of a pier. Who is she? I don’t know, I got whiplash. (Queen of parentheses and side notes, I know. But another thing about me is... I’ve never been affected by people leaving my life. I’m used to it. I’ve never been anywhere as affected as I was when my ex and I broke up. This isn’t normal for me, my ENTJ/Capricorn ass doesn’t know what this feeling is.)

Please curse that has been put on me, release me. Whoever is attacking my voodoo doll, calm down! Please! I’ve gone through enough sadness and loss. If 2019 is even slightly as bad, I’m going to be like that pigeon I reblogged the other day that’s like “fuck this I’m just going to sit here.” I can’t even make a cute but corny, hopeful “hope 2019 is great!” comment. I’m literally begging you...pleading you... I don’t believe in karma but after all of this shit, I better have something much better in stock for me. “Good things are coming!” I fucking hope so. Like, I’ll be even more annoying right now and say that it’s not fair that I didn’t get to have the future I was about to have. I don’t care about any cliche you may have for me. One door closes, everything happens for a reason, God has a plan, etc. No. Why did all of this have to happen? What can be better than the future I was going to have? I felt so unlucky. It all feels like a nightmare and I’m just waiting to feel whole again. Oh shit I got really intense. I know I’ll get over it and life will be good again eventually but for now, I am still so mad. I would have never in a million years guessed this is how my 2018 would go. 

So fine, I’ve accepted things now, so now I’m impatient and say please prove me wrong, 2019. I’m THREATENING you to be amazing!

[gigilberry-wips]

20 Facts About Charlotte (and family) That The Readers Will Not Be Given In The Story

So here I am trying to organize my thoughts and do some character building in order to answer some questions about my oc that someone was very nice to ask and which I still need to come up with answers for, carry on with your business don’t mind me

(for those who’re sticking around to read this, a warning: this is long as heck)

1. Charlie was known as that kid who’d always be full of questions and giving the adults a run for their money “Why do crocodiles have big noses?” “Where does the moon go?” “Why don’t humans have claws? Aren’t they more useful than fingernails?” “Why do people sleep?” “Why are we supposed to do this? Why can’t we do that?” “Why can’t we ask questions? How would anyone learn things if they don’t ask questions??”

2. In her family she’s closest to her older brother. She doesn’t always share her concerns with him but when she comes to him with her thoughts and questions she trusts his words.

3. One time she read in a book where a meal of grilled cheese and tomato soup was described so delectably that for one entire month she insisted on having that at least once a day (it’s like what happened with me and when I read about the ‘bread and butterflies’ from “Through The Looking Glass” and now if anyone ever offered me a towering stack of heavily buttered toast with an ocean of horrifically sugary milk tea I swear I will devour the whole thing no hesitation). She stopped being so vocally fussed with them after that but she never really got over it. So if, whenever she might see either one of those two (or both!!) in the wilds, be it in person or on television or if she just catches the smell of it, and if you happen to be looking at her already then you just might catch her making The. Biggest. Heart Eyes. Like the love of her life has appeared before her and she is going to run into their arms and both of them will head off into the sunset.

4. Her favorite things to get on Christmas and her birthday are “fun science projects for kids”, or puzzle and strategy games, or books that had riddles, secret codes, recipes, more experiments, and especially made-up languages in them. She’s filled entire notebooks with the languages that she’s learnt from books, from Morse Code to Tolkien elvish, and she can easily recall many of them from memory. She knows a lot of the most common kinds of numerical puzzles and algorithms that have been used, and partially due to that and partially because of how good she is in math she frequently makes computer related jokes about herself.

5. Charlie’s brother is doing an internship at a nearby aerospace museum and planetarium. He’s currently studying for a degree in astronomy and engineering and works as one of the technicians there, and about once a month Charlie’s family goes to visit and have a picnic nearby and spend the day there. Since it’s so close, her brother is able to go from home and usually drops her and her friends off to school in the mornings in his old, beat-up car because he’s a good brother and he loves his sister.

6. One time when Charlotte was little (about 7-8) she was loaned a textbook from her school about famous people that she had to do her homework from. Her brother caught her scribbling in it with a pencil one time and found out that she was replacing all the pronouns of the historical figures in it (Mr. Miss Alexander Graham Bell, he she invented, Mr. Miss Albert Einstein, he she discovered, etc.).

(She didn’t really have the words for it back then but essentially she was doing this because all of these Oh So Important People Of History(TM) Who Did Oh So Important Things(TM) were different from her and she was very strongly aware of that and it made her really, really angry. She thought that if the only thing anyone was ever going to teach her was White Man History(TM) and that’s the only thing that ever existed since the dawn of time and that’s the only thing she’d ever learn then she wasn’t just gonna sit there and swallow that like the rest of her classmates, thank you.)

The next day he bought her a book about famous women in history from all around the world. She read it cover to cover and has kept that book with her to this very day. It’s got pictures like this in it too :D -

[image description] Three women (left to right: Indian, Japanese, and Syrian) who graduated from the Women’s Medical College of Pennsylvania in 1886

This is also one of the reasons why she likes Star Trek so much, and why she wants to learn so many languages.

[Edit: if anyone’s wondering, her brother’s the one who erased the pencil marks from her textbook. He told her since she’s the one who did it then she should be the one to remove it. But she refused to do it and she did not say sorry either. He knew she’d get in trouble if he told his parents or anyone about it, or if it was left alone, so he sat down with an eraser and methodically went through the book with it himself.

Charlie neither offered to help nor stopped him (she could’ve if she’d wanted to, she had cheeto crumbs on her fingers and she could’ve smeared them in the book or poked her brother with them but she didn’t); she just attached herself to his side and quietly glared because that textbook is Enemy #1 and no one should touch it as his hand patiently went through page after page and removed all traces of her vandalism]

7. Charlie loves her hair. When she was little one of her favorite shows was My Little Pony (don’t tell anyone but she still has a soft spot for it) and she wanted to have bright, colorful hair just like the other ponies did. One of her cousins was very fashion savvy and when she told her this, her cousin showed her all the fun hairstyles she could do with her own hair instead. She’s been growing out her hair ever since. Now Charlie and her brother are Long Hair Siblings(TM). :D

8. On the other hand, Charlie despises make up. When she was little she noticed that almost the only people that were on make up advertisements were white women, so in her head she thought that meant those pretty women owned the make up companies, right? Well, she looked it up and learned that the people who really owned the companies were not those women but instead ugly old men and that was when she came to the conclusion that advertisements are all full of lies and not to be trusted (also she learnt later that silicone rubber is used in making water proof mascara and her brain is forever scarred with that knowledge and now so is yours :DD)

9. When she got her first loose tooth she heard about the tooth fairy and how she takes teeth and leaves money. So her natural course of action was to look up the price of human teeth online. Then she took the case up with her father and told him all about her findings and how the tooth fairy was basically scamming everybody and should not be trusted. He found this entertaining enough that the morning after she lost her tooth she found a 2 dollar bill under her pillow. She kept it away safely and once she had enough “tooth money” she bought a whole set of glitter gel pens with it.

10. The number of times Charlie’s gone to a party can be counted on one hand, and that’s only because she was forced to go. One such house she’s frequented is one of her aunt’s and after all these years the only name she knows from there is the cat’s, whose name is Toast but she thought that was boring so in her head she renamed her as Clementine. She hasn’t told anyone else that she’s never learnt anyone else’s name but she has the feeling her brother knows.

11. She loves cats. She loves them so much. She was always such a solemn and serious little girl but the moment she saw a cat it’s like watching a toddler wandering after a butterfly. Abso-lutely adorable. She has these knitted cat socks and 2 cat plushies (one more worn than the other) and when she was 11 her parents let her and her brother adopt an orange kitten and she got to name it Tigger after one of her favorite childhood characters. In her friend group there are so many cat puns surrounding her. So many. (half of them are her own btw)

12. Charlotte is bisexual. I remember reading somewhere that it’s unrealistic to just have one lgbt kid all by their lonesome in any story worth telling and I agreed with that. I’ve also heard about the “disaster bisexual” troupe. In my cast of characters the one that fits it the most is Josie, so me being myself I flipped that troupe and instead made the most calm and collected one the bisexual kid (so instead of a disaster bisexual(TM) what we have is a distinguished bisexual(TM), thank you and good night). It’s not mentioned in the story because this story is told from Laila’s point of view and Charlie hasn’t told anyone about her sexuality, not her friends, not her family, not anyone. She learnt about it earlier than Laila did (when she was 13), but like it’s said in her intro she’s a very cautious and private person and it’ll take her a long time to think about something so personal openly let alone talk about it with anyone. I want to talk about this more in a separate post, and I’ve got a one shot planned that’ll focus on this too.

(Edit: so it turns out Charlie is in fact a bit of a disaster human and when I told her she comes off as smart and polished and good at judging people’s intentions she turned around and told me she also hisses under her breath at things she doesn’t like, lives in her room like it’s one giant nest, and sometimes forgets to eat and i find it too annoying to argue with my strong willed daughter so here we are goddamn)

13. For Charlie, feelings are ... awkward. They’re messy and confusing, and when she’s feeling too many things she needs a lot of alone time to sort through them and understand them. It’s not that she doesn’t feel anything, it’s just that she can’t usually identify what she feels from the whirlwind in her head in any proper way. And when people need comforting she doesn’t feel like she’s the best person for the job. But that’s not going to stop her from trying to help; if one of her friends comes to her with a problem then she’s going to help them find logical solutions to those problems. She knows her strengths and she tries her best to use them.

14. She finds it hard to cry. Even when she’s feeling too many things and she really wants to cry (because she thinks maybe that’ll help her, at least it’s scientifically proven to help) the tears won’t always come. Aside from early childhood, she can count on one hand the number of times she’s cried, and half of them are from when she was exhausted or shocked with sudden feelings. The other times feel random to her and often at odds with each other. (She can’t force herself to cry, she can’t fake her own emotions.)

15. One of the few times she remembers crying was the first time she saw the Aurora Borealis. She saw it in a movie theater, not in person, but to her it was like seeing the real thing. She was little at the time and when she saw it she was just - she was overwhelmed. She was overwhelmed with so many feelings, like happiness and beauty and wonderment. When they came out of the theater and her family saw her still crying they all started freaking out, until she tried to explain it to them (she was really choked up but she tried). She remembered describing it something like, “It’s like seeing music ... Mama, I think I saw music.” she counts this as the one time she expressed her words so artistically she doesn’t know how but she did. it was also one of those rare times she was envious of artistic people for being able to express human emotions so well (there’s that part in The Tale of Despereaux when he said that he “heard honey” when what he’d really heard was music that comes to my mind). Later, she was told what the lights were called and she decided then and there that if she ever had a daughter then she’d name her Aurora (no papa, not from Sleeping Beauty, this is different!). It was also around this time that she really got into learning about space.

16. Charlie’s a night owl. She loves being awake when all the world is asleep. She loves the silence and the clarity she feels in her thoughts when there is no one else around.

17. Charlotte has an “all things pink and glitter” obsession that she never quite grew out of and never really plans to. Her room is pink, her glasses are pink, her stationary is pink, most of her clothes are pink, and her favorite Care Bear and My Little Pony characters are also pink.

18. She got her glasses when she was around 10, and she even got to choose them herself. :D The sad thing was that she was only one of 2 kids in her grade who had glasses and the other one was who she considered to be an annoying prat, but the good news was that at least 3 girls in her year got braces and one of them was nice and called her glasses pretty and also she was the only one who’d done her braces sparkly so there.

19. Most her life she never had close friends. She was always considered too smart and aloof for them. She had her nose stuck in books and she always got the best grades in her year. She was also really good at chess and strategy games and not to brag but she’s even one a few awards for this and this quality was always something that alarmed and frustrated people to no end (read: boys who wanted to prank her and various arrogant, would-be bullies) when she would know all sorts of things about them that they never remembered telling her. What they didn’t know was that she gathered all that information just from observing them and listening to what they said. She’s a strategist and a planner and she delights in knowing more than everybody else, making it so that when she wasn’t purposefully faded into the background, she came off as intimidating and scary, and rightly so. You cross her or try to pull any nonsense around her and she’ll make you regret it.

20. Contrary to what I feel might be predictable for her, it wasn’t Hailey (the friendly and cheerful one) or Josie (the smart and sociable one) that pulled Charlie into Laila’s friend group, but instead it was Laila herself. Charlie might not be good when it comes to feelings, both hers and other people’s, but she’s an excellent judge of character. She doesn’t talk to her peers because she’s categorized them as not being her “type”. She sees them and thinks they’re silly and petty and loud and annoying. She gets impatient with how childish and flighty and apparently short of memory they are, how they haven’t yet decided what they want with their life, how they’re all sooooo fussed about what other people want them to be and how they haven’t made up their minds about who they want to be. Dealing with them is boring and somehow oddly exhausting, so she doesn’t waste her time with them.

She and Laila met through circumstance. And what she immediately got from Laila was that she was someone who was filled with something akin to gentle warmth. She saw someone who didn’t judge or expect things from her. Someone who didn’t raise her hackles or crowd her space, both physically and mentally. She saw a person who didn’t pretend to be something she wasn’t, who didn’t really have anything to hide. Most of all, she saw in Laila someone who went about her day with honesty and good will in her actions towards others, who was genuine and caring. Those are things she’s not often found in other people, no matter their age. It’s something that she’s come to appreciate and respect in the rare, rare instances when she does find it. It took a while, but as she got to know Laila and her other friends better and hung out with them more often, she saw that she found a place where she felt like she could breathe.

[thechocobros]

“SEE LUNA SAFE TO ALTISSIA” - EPILOGUE

Pair: Nyx Ulric / Lunafreya Nox Fleuret

Words: 2617

@nyxulricweek , Day #7:  “As long as I have strength in my body…”

Rating: Mature (not NSFW though)

Plot: Luna and Nyx didn’t fell in the Empire’s trap, Nyx didn’t had to use the ring and he survived. What would have happened if Nyx really had the chance to ‘see Luna safe to Altissia’, like he promised to Regis?

Personal Comment: This is it. This is the end. What can I say? Just ... Thank you. One year long journey on this fic. Thank you. Thank you really :”) and thanks to @loveiscosmicsin, my editor in all this <3

Sometimes Nyx wondered how he managed to survive when so many of his loved ones didn’t. Selena, Crowe, Pelna, comrades in arms in the Kingsglaive, and countless civilians… They all deserved life, even more than him, and yet, they were not alive when the fog of the battle dissipated. He was. He shouldn’t have. He challenged fate so many times it was mathematically unbelievable that he emerged unscathed. 

For what, anyway? Maybe there was no specific reason. Good people were rise to shine in the spotlight and good people burn out like candles when it’s their time. After all, it’s just the circle of life. For now, it was not his time to join them.

And yet… He wanted to believe there was a reason he’s still here. If everything he had done was worth it in the end. The victory of survival rang hollow when he could do nothing to honor the memory of those who led him there. What came next would be entirely up to him. A purpose, drive, meaning, anything to clutch and lean toward until he found answers. He knew just the person for that.

Nyx searched for them in Luna’s pretty eyes, now so meditative and relaxed, gaze settled on his figure. Usually so blue, they were shining with the colors of the sunset across the distance. They look also a bit sad, distant, even, it did strike a chord of alarm within him and reasonably so. She was seated on the grass, casually caressing the marks on his neck left by the fight in Altissia. Was she contemplating over how she was still alive, too? If she did, Nyx hoped to be her reason to live, as she was his. 

 "We should head back, my captain. Ravus must be looking for us," she whispered, sweetly as warmth glowed her cheeks. Like the beautiful paradox she was, she didn’t even rush to stop the caress, nor made no movement that matched her words. She just kept sweeping her fingers through his hair, lingering on his braids, and thoughtfully tracing them. 

“My captain,” he repeated, taken back by the title she chose to address him with. Well, what he attained. After all, he was gained the title of captain in Tenebrae’s Army, cooperating strictly with Cor Leonis, the captain of Insomnia’s Royal Guards and Kingsglaive, or what was left of it. In fact, these two captains had been preoccupied with the combined powers of Tenebrae and Lucis. Somehow, they ran across soldiers from the more distant corners of Eos. Being granted the rank in recognition of the valor and sacrifices he’s demonstrated looked pretty on paper, but the reason behind his unforeseeable promotion was simply…

“I’m a Captain just because I’m your husband. Damn, didn’t see that there were perks to our marriage besides seeing you, beautiful.”

“Don’t pretend you don’t like to be called like that. It suits you, hero.”

She was calm and serene saying it now, but when she assigned him the position at the beginning, she had her doubts. Firstly, she didn’t intend to place such a burden on his shoulders only because they impulsively wedded back when they thought they had no future. Secondly, because administrating Eos’ armies after all what happened would have kept him so busy. And yes, she missed him every time they were apart. During their long and epic journey from Insomnia to Altissia, she got so used in having him at her very side all along that now, waking up without him felt like being deprived of an arm or leg.

But this temporary aversion aside, Nyx had been amazing so far: he had managed to come back to her almost every day, even if exhausted, he always found time for her. No matter the world’s crisis, he wouldn’t ever have renounced to those special moments with her. 

“Then I’ll call you ‘my queen’." 

"Technically, you couldn’t, since Ravus is the King, which puts me as your humble princess." 

"Why can everyone call you ‘Queen’ but me?” Nyx groused, pretending to be outraged.

Luna giggled in response, leaning on him a bit. “Masses don’t care for logic, they just need new deities to worship now that the Astrals are gone. They also have in mind my mother’s example, and they want to give me the same title of Queen Oracle. You’re not like that, my darling. You do understand the difference, don’t you?”

“I do… Princess. It’s just a waste. You’d look amazing as a queen.” Nyx sighed, acknowledging one more time how Luna was good with words, kind of manipulating him to do whatever she wanted him to. Even over small things.

So that was what they were now. 

He was the captain of a bigger army than he could handle, she was the guiding liberator, the light and the balance in a post-apocalyptic world swallowed by chaos. 

After Noctis’ disappearance inside the Crystal, the small group of people who was aware of what really happened reacted with spontaneity and an organized intelligence. To face the emergency, Ravus and Aranea—the only two heroes who were part of the imperial army already—dominated control of the dying Empire. The emperor made deceased somehow by the hand of Izunia anyway, so it was enough to occupy the vacant throne, to proclaim themselves rulers and to command the remaining troops to surrender to the new government and the ‘coup d'etat’ was done. The evil Empire had fallen, its twisted games were overthrown. To be honest, neither of them thought that taking over the world would have been so easy. 

But if getting on top of Eos had been unexpectedly quick and simple, taking care of it challenged them further. 

Claustra, as Accordo’s First Secretary, stepped forward to the powers afforded with her office and mandated that all the world’s survivors seek refuge at safe havens. Ravus and Aranea agreed this was a priority since everyone started to realize that Izunia was still alive, Darkness would fall upon them soon.

Now was not the time to rebuild Eos. Not yet. They got to be prepared for the worse was yet to come. 

So, they asked Luna to have an inspirational speech as soon as possible, to inform everyone about what was about to happen. She did as she was requested for Eos’s sake. There, they announced that Lestallum would be the only haven. Following their beloved Oracle’s behest, masses started to flood the city. To aid their journey to the bustling haven and as her mother did before her, Luna enchanted the glowing havens positioned along the way where many offered words of gratitude for the Oracle’s steadfast guidance and wishes for their safety.

Lodgings and the seemingly vast perimeters in Lestallum shrink with passing day.

Libertus was with them. After all that happened, his chubby face was a call from a very distant memory. A bittersweet memory made of the scattered images of their home in Galahd, then Niflheim’s attack, their survival, and then the cruel fights in the Kingsglaive, street life in the slums of Insomnia …. Seeing him again was better than anything Nyx could’ve wished for. Such was the joy that the new Tenebrae Captain delayed all his appointments to spend a night in a bar of Lestallum with his friend, drinking beer and eating cup noodles. He had a lot to tell and six hours were barely enough for them to catch up on each other’s adventures. They both agreed that even if their lives changed so drastically, they would have kept their dreams alive. They promised to return back to Galahd one day and rebuild it from the ground up. When the King set all things right again, they would have had the time and the disposition for doing so.

However, if going back and forth from Lestallum to Tenebrae meant for Nyx at least some moments of happiness in seeing the old friend, for Luna it was not the same. The idea of leaving her homeland for an unspecified time distressed her a lot more than expected. It was not easy to accept that running away was their only option especially after all they done to grant the light. She knew it was temporary and that the King would have come back… And yet, she couldn’t help but watching the news with sad eyes and heavy heart. 

And now… Now it was her turn. She was the next one to get ready to leave her own homeland. 

"How’re you feeling?” Nyx took Lunafreya’s hand, stopping her caresses. He kissed her fingers with his dry lips. “You ready?" Luna hesitated at the question. She didn’t want to lie so she just waited for his intuition to pick up the cue. "I’m sorry, Lunafreya." 

Luna forced herself to take her eyes off him and contemplate the view around them. It was somewhat painful. She just didn’t want to believe that there was another farewell to her homeland. The sylleblossoms field they were resting on smelled like grass, earth, and flowers, and it was soft. Being the perfect picture frame for the buildings in the distance, it impressed an indelible memory in her head. It was the perfect place to have some rest, glowing like that at the last rays of the sunset… yes, the sunset. It was just 1 AM. The days were growing shorter and shorter. 

 "I will be fine.” Her voice tried to be strong, but Nyx understood the sadness beyond it, as expected. 

“I’m sorry, Lunafreya. I know you don’t want to leave but we have no other choice” he repeated, sitting next to her and pulling her close, driven by the sudden need to comfort her. She initially tried to avoid it, like she wanted to deny her actual distress. But when Nyx insisted, she just let herself go, and literally melt in his embrace. She didn’t cry though. She was tired of crying. “I lost you once and I can’t risk letting it happen again. Daemons get closer to the palace every passing day and we can’t push them away anymore." 

“…Noctis will settle this.”

"He will. But in the meantime, it’s my job to protect you. For as long as I have strength in my body. Like it has always been. Like it will always be." 

Nyx kissed her eyes, pressing her breasts against his chest. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, protected by each other’s warmth from the breeze, and in the meantime Luna’s eyes wondered on the landscape. In that moment of calm, when she felt of belonging to that position, Luna let herself get lost in the memories of their incredible journey. 

They went through so much …

“Remember the first night we talked at the ceremony’s eve, next to the aquarium?” she asked. He smiled.

“How could I forget the first time you dragged me into troubles and almost got me fired?” 

“Just appreciate the prize you won taking that risk.”

Nyx couldn’t argue with that: because of her, he stepped into an insane journey made of horrifying revelations and difficult trials, but also made of laughter, electric emotions, and soft complicity. From the very first time their eyes met, Nyx and Luna got involved into a crazy spiral of events that brought them closer and closer. Now, their existences were entwined. He really couldn’t complain about it.

What a joke of destiny their entire life seemed right now, Nyx thought. No, no destiny. It had been their choice, from the beginning to the end. If he had the chance to go back in time, he would have done it all over again, exactly in the same way. 

"You’re right.” Nyx smirked, deciding in that very moment to warm things up a bit. He raised his eyebrows and moved the hands from her shoulders to her legs, grabbing them tight. “Who would have thought I would have been able to put my hands on such a princess?” he whispered, trying to get as seductive as he could. He wondered what effect he would have sorted and didn’t need to wait to find out. Luna immediately blushed hard and gasped. After months of marriage, she still wasn’t used to him getting sensual and this constantly caused Nyx to laugh. He thought it was funny - and irresistible - the way she looked like an untouched maiden every time he got closer. That was one of her best lies, of course, because she was everything but innocent and pure and Nyx had many chances to notice.

“Nyx, you should wait until–” Nyx cut her words by kissing her lips, soft and roughly at the same time, pulling her in for the make out session he was always starving for. With her hands exploring his chest and his neck, he felt like healing. And maybe it was true. She was really healing him, on so many levels.

He moaned, letting her hands taking care of the marks of the Ring on his skin. He felt light sneaking in his veins, replacing the darkness that the ring branded him with. They would have had this forever, probably. His own light had been the price for using a power that was not his to have. But Luna had enough light to share and it would have kept him alive for a very long time.

So, forgetting the past, all that Nyx thought of now was tasting her with his lips. Her jaw, her soft neck, her delicate shoulder. Teasing her was so pleasant. He pulled her closer, in the attempt to wear her like a second skin.

“I’m not good at waiting,” he justified himself, inhaling her sweet perfume.

Luna leaned back, trying to catch a breath and say something but Nyx reclaimed her lips back immediately, making hard for her to think straight. The girl could only settle herself against his body, gently cupping his cheeks.

“Wrong. You’re good at everything.”

“Flattery gets you anywhere.” He replied trying to kiss her again, but Luna was ready to prove him wrong. She pulled back with more decision, standing on her feet and smirking. Nyx sighed, in sign of surrender. He never had a chance against her anyway. She was a princess, used to being in command, stubborn enough to not changing her mind after she decided something.

“Okay, fine. Let’s go back to the castle” he snapped his tongue. He was about to add “for the last night” and even if he didn’t, Luna seemed to sense the unspoken words in the air. 

Her face immediately turned from cheeky to sad again. So, Nyx stood up and lifted her chin.

“I know. Not the happy ending you expected." 

Luna shook her head, holding to his hand. 

"It is happy, in a sense. Bittersweet would best describe it, but far from… an ending.”

Nyx looked for something appropriate to say and settled with, “Maybe it’s better that way. I don’t like endings anyway. I like life. I like the journey. And we’ll keep having ours together.” Luna seemed puzzled by his words for a moment, then smiled. Nyx’s eyes sweetened in watching her. “As long as I have strength in my body… I’ll fight for the future, ours, and the entire world’s. So, we’re gonna have a happy ending, Lunafreya. But not for now. Now we can enjoy our happy journey.”

Luna’s smile enlarged in his hand caressing her. Suddenly, Nyx was certain he never saw something brighter. 

Putting her arms around his neck and standing on the tips of her toes, she whispered, “Yes.”

And they headed back to the palace, ready to face whatever it was about to come.

[ritebeforeyoureyes]

Haunt

Sorry this took me a while to write! I have been super busy running errands and adapting to a lifestyle that doesn’t involve studying 24/7 lol.

Masterlist – Plot: Zendaya learns more about Tom’s lifestyle.

Haunt (Chapter Seventeen) 

Zendaya was in her studio and for the first time in a while, Tom wasn’t with her. With some elusive charity gala coming up, Tom had reluctantly gone to speak with his father about the details. As a result, Jon was sat on a bench looking as stern and yet surprisingly joyful whilst Darnell ran about doing mundane chores.

“I like that one.” Jon ushered to a photograph that made both Darnell and Zendaya pause with what they were doing. The picture in reference was one that Zendaya was initially incredibly hesitant to put on the market; the picture being one that she took. Her studio held pictures taken by both her and Darnell and an array of local photographers, but it was always the freelance photographers who sold the most. They were usually photographs of the stereotypical skyscrapers and the sunset; pictures that normal American families hung up in their living rooms.

But the one that Jon was admiring was one Zendaya had taken on the streets near her apartment. It was of a deserted children’s park during the fall, the swings in motion with the wind and a sullen eeriness haunting the whole space. There was graffiti on the walls, a grey cloudiness in the sky and benches that looked as battered and bruised as the slides inhabiting the park. It was meant to be a place of happiness and childishness and this picture didn’t embody that. In Zendaya’s mind it inadvertently showed off the inequality in New York. This tucked away spot hadn’t been cared for in months, years even, and Zendaya thought it was sad. Because parks, to her, were a symbol of childhood innocence.

Her childhood, before everything hit the ceiling, was a decent enough one; one that had shaped the person that she was today. Her parents were pretty crappy, but Nikki and Dom had been the substitute parents that she’d always needed. One of her fondest memories was of them taking the whole Holland clan and her out for some time in the sun at their local park. They’d drink Nikki’s lemonade on a picnic blanket before making a ruckus whilst trying to fight for the two free swings. It was always Tom and Zendaya who won, a very young Sam and Harry left sulking in the corner. But, those memories – regardless of how painful they were for Zendaya to look upon now – had reminded her that there was good in the world. That people like Nikki and Dom were kind and loving and that she could also be one of those people. That one day, when Zendaya had children of her own, she’d be able to be parents like they had been.

So, it didn’t sit right with Zendaya that something like a park – that was meant to be so wholesomely good – had now probably just become an abandoned spot for dodgy drug deals as it got dark. It was why she taken the picture in the first place, to expose the bleak reality of living where she did. Children from her local area didn’t get a childhood, not one that enabled them to run freely outside or hang with their friends at a play area. Parents were worried for their children, locking them insides and away from the dangers of the world and Zendaya wanted to embody that in her picture. But, it was definitely not something your average person wanted to purchase; nobody wanted the reminder of how screwed up the world actually was hanging in their home. “It’s real, I like that.”

“Really?” Zendaya tilted her head and admired her work. “No one’s ever said that to me.”

“You’re not capturing perfection, like that.” Jon pointed to another picture that had been taken in the fall. It looked like a college campus, NYU’s maybe, with autumnal coloured leaves covering a pretty gothic building; people in the foreground sipping coffees and dressed warm in sweatshirts and big scarves. There was a streak of sunlight hitting the front and it was picturesque. It was the type of photograph that was destined for the cover of a university prospectus or brochure. “Life isn’t all chai lattes and smiles. You’re basically calling out the bullshit of that picture with your own.”

“That actually means a lot, thanks Jon.” Zendaya nodded with a sense of pride, glad that somebody other than herself had picked up on the message she was trying to convey. “You’re the only person who’s ever picked up on the message behind that picture.”

“It’s crazy, you know-” After a pregnant silence between the two, Jon had Zendaya’s undivided attention. She stared at him curiously, urging him to explain himself. “How you and Tom are so different and yet so alike.”  

“Why is that?”

“He’s like you, always sees that differing view on people.” Jon had only ever known wealthy Tom Holland, but he had spent enough time with him to know he wasn’t just the stereotypical rich man that he was portrayed as in the media. “But-“

“But what?” Now Zendaya was intrigued. Jon knew more about this newer version of Tom than she did, and she was interested to know what Jon truly thought of him. Zendaya had seen Tom snap at Sam and Harry, masking his behaviour under the pretence that he was their boss and now, she was genuinely how he treated Jon; a man whose fatherly qualities she’d grown accustomed to.

“That’s not always a good thing. You’re humble, down to earth-”

“And Tom isn’t?”

“It’s not that, necessarily.” Jon tried to provide Zendaya with an insight into the life she had unfairly been thrust into whilst simultaneously treading on eggshells. He obviously couldn’t reveal anything of substance that would get him in trouble with Tom. “Look, what we do is dangerous, and you experience a lot of shit that even your worst nightmares couldn’t compare. That screws with a guy’s head, then when you throw money into the mix, it’s-”  

“A mess?”

“Exactly.” Jon nodded as a sombre expression clouded over Zendaya’s face. She was beginning to grow more and more sympathetic to Tom’s situation, her defences weakening as she exposed herself to him little by little. “To a working-class person, this life looks so easy. This is what they aspire to become and it’s not as black and white as that. Wealth and privilege isn’t all it’s made out to be.”

And Jon’s were the truth. Because the root of all of Tom’s problems originated from the wealth and privilege he had been thrust into and as he hit the gym with his father, that thought circled through his brain over and over again.

“Hit me again.” With a loud groan and a heavy swing at his Dad, Tom tried to punch Dom square in the chest. Dom bounced around a boxing ring with his arms up in defence. His eldest son, due to his obligations with Zendaya, hadn’t hit the gym in a while and Dom thought having a business conversation over some laddish time would be good for Tom. However, the hit demonstrated how laxed Tom had become with his combat skills. Dom had deflected the punch instantly and forced Tom’s body to the floor with a loud thud. The sound resonated through the room and Dom huffed in evident frustration. “Get up.”

“Jesus, Dad.” Tom groaned as he slinked over to the side of the ring with an aching shoulder. He clutched it tightly, aware that it would probably bruise in the morning. “Could have gone a little easy on me-“

“You get into a fight, no one’s going to take it easy on you-“

“I know that.” Tom retaliated quickly. “But you know I haven’t been training-“

“And whose fault is that?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” As Dom made the remark, Tom jumped on the defence immediately, his tone of voice snappy.

“It means you’ve gotten your priorities mixed up.”  Before Tom could respond, Dom held his hand up with an aura of authority that even Tom couldn’t ignore. Despite ruling over the majority of their employees, Tom was still inferior to his father in the hierarchy that was their family. “Son, you know I like Zendaya, she was like a daughter to me, but this isn’t good for us. This thing you’re doing, keeping her protected, it will only last so long. Harrison will keep trying and one day he’ll succeed. It’s a cat and mouse game-“

“I’m not letting that happen.”

“Maybe you should.” Dom muttered it under his breathe but the comment rang eerily through the spacious gym space.

“Are you crazy? That’s happening over my dead body.” Tom jumped up, ignoring the pain in his shoulder as his eyes bulged open. He couldn’t comprehend how his father had gone from referring to Zendaya as his daughter to dangling her in front of Harrison and his men as bait.

“Don’t talk to me with that tone, boy. I am still your father.” Dom instructed with a wag of his index finger and Tom reluctantly lowered his gaze. “All I’m trying to say is, is she worth it? Because you’ve got tunnel vision right now and all you see is her. But our business, my business is suffering because of it-“

“Nothing is suffering!” Tom didn’t understand where his father’s lecture was coming from. Surprisingly, Sam and Harry were taking good care of The Brother’s Trust since Tom had adopted the role as Zendaya’s primary bodyguard.  There had been a handful of successful drug shipping’s and a few social appearances that upheld the Holland’s’ charitable stature; all of which had occurred without Tom or Dom’s intervention. And, the planning for their upcoming charity gala was going well too. “The twins are handling the gala-“

In fact, the twins were handling the gala so well, it had become all the talk among New York socialite. Actors and actresses, CEOs and musicians; everyone who was anyone had gotten an invite for what the papers were calling the event of the year.

“Speaking of which, does she know about the gala? Zendaya?”

“Yeah. Of course, she does.” Tom had had the initial chat about the gala with Harry in front of Zendaya; she just didn’t know why the event was being held. He didn’t want to ruin everything and risk her freaking out about the prospect of seeing Harrison in the flesh. But all in all, she was excited about the event; a possible space for her to network her own business. She had never been to something of such a magnitude before and she was eager to schmooze with Hollywood’s finest in a pretty dress.

“She’s not on the guest list, right?”

“Dad, what’s going on with you today?” Of course, she is!”

Deep down, Dom understood Tom’s reasoning behind caring for Zendaya so deeply. Tom had always loved her, but love made you weak in the business that they were in. It was why Dom had allowed Nikki to be the loving and caring parent in their world. It was also why he slowly but surely faded into a loveless marriage. His marriage was a pretence of fake smiles and paparazzi pictures; an act to fool both their children and the world. And Dom didn’t want Tom to have to deal with the heartbreak that came with that. He was the practical person, the person that called out the bullshit and unfortunately, he was having to do that exact thing to Tom now. With his family and only his family’s best interests at heart, Dom knew Tom’s relationship with Zendaya wouldn’t end well. She would ruin him and his inability to fight efficiently at the gym proved that. She was his Achilles heel and as Dom grew older, he knew that soon, he needed Tom to have full reigns of the business. Tom needed to be involved in the nitty gritty details of this corrupt world and no woman could love a man like that. No woman could lie next to a man who killed for a living and be okay with that. And he didn’t want Tom to face that realisation three years or thirty years from now.

“You think bringing her as your date will be wise?”

“I don’t get your sudden vendetta against the girl you just called your daughter but I’m bringing her to the gala-“

“Fine. But let me tell you this, have you thought of a back up plan if everything goes tits up on the day-“

“What do you mean?”

“The twins’ plan is good, clever, actually! But it’s too idealistic, what if things don’t go to plan? What if Harrison’s already one step ahead? You’re basically giving her to him if he is.” As Dom spoke, the gears turned in Tom’s head. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, his Dad was right. Harrison was unpredictable, and Tom had no clue what he was planning. What if he saw right through his gala’s true intentions? What if it was his chance to cause some real damage? “So, listen to me and listen to me clear, Thomas, don’t bring Zendaya anywhere near that gala.”

If you enjoyed this piece and would like to help further me and my work, please support me whilst I get through university. The money you donate will go towards assisting me in my student fees, rent etc. It is one hundred per cent a voluntary pursuit and greatly appreciated, however, your lovely comments, likes and reblogs are always welcomed too. Thank you for being the greatest: https://ko-fi.com/D1D072V0

[deereelis]

My Changing Face

If you’ve had an opportunity to spend time with me & have proof of pictures in your camera roll of our time together, I’m certain I’m smiling or that you caught a glimpse of deep laughter and some great memories. At the risk of sounding full of myself, I’m not just saying I’m a fun time, but I am also lifting my innate ability to alchemize the most trying of times into joy or laughter. I am a Goddess & the medicine I provide is an elixir of love, laughter & light.

During my sickest days, while the medicines I took swelled up my face almost beyond recognition; I still smiled. I had a lot to smile about. I was blessed with infinite love within and around me & every day on earth was a day worth celebrating, in spite of my struggles.

There are things that happen to you when you’re sick, or have been inflicted harm by a sick person that makes you look at & live life ‘differently.’ Since the age of 8, I hid from any opportunity where I could be seen or highlighted. I didn’t want to be seen as pretty, sexy or attractive; honestly, I just didn’t want to be seen. I hid behind humor, my body, dark clothes and worked hard to become ‘one of the guys’. Confession: I haven’t owned a nice bra since high school. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I started a spiritual journey 2 years ago, but I had a profound awakening in November 2018, while surrounded by the divine. I was able to see myself from a different perspective, from a place of reverence & love. No longer did I want to settle for basic survival; i wanted to live fully. I didn’t want to continue my subscription to self-defeating beliefs that I was too big to sit here, go there, be accepted or be loved. Or that I had to settle for some sub-standard of love because I was big & dis-eased.

Knowing there were young women all around me, including my daughter that looked to me for mentorship. No longer did I feel that the roles of ‘wife’ ‘mom’ ‘Councilor’ ‘daughter’ ‘leader’ ‘sister’ defined me. In fact, the ONLY thing that could define me, was me & I had no idea what that meant. I knew that whenever I figured out who ‘Damali’ is and she lived in her true power and truths; it would allow for her to be a better ‘mom’ or ‘daughter’ . It also meant that some of those titles we identified with may no longer resonate in the end; and that was okay too.

I’d attend parties, clubs, events, get-togethers and feel uneasy because I knew I was only there because I was expected to be there. In fact, many of the things I did & roles I played were because society expected them from me; but what did Damali really want? Who is Damali?

I began telling people I loved them, rubbing on my beautiful soft bumpy body, loving me, watching sunrises, sunsets, looking to the sky when it rained, wearing different material of clothes on my skin, listening to more music, moving my body shamelessly, writing, reading, dancing, meditating more, eating differently and not being scared to be myself or be seen.

So if I wanted to sit on the grass, I’d sit on the grass and wouldn’t worry about “how would I get back up?” If I felt something strong, I’d name it. I became mindful of how I treated others & how they treated me & called out inconsistencies & pushed myself to do better. I knew as a mom, we often put many pressures on ourselves & didn’t allow room for fuck-ups. So I made wiggle room by changing the rules I subscribed to.

Was I a bad mother for missing my daughters soccer game? No.

Was I a bad mother for letting her walk home rather than switch my schedule around to pick her up from school? No.

Was I a bad mother for needing time alone and prioritizing quiet time for myself? No.

Was I a bad wife for recognizing the love I longed for or was capable of giving looked different than how we were living? No

In fact, I wanted to be sure to show my daughter the lessons I’d learned by teaching her that no one holds a perfect record in anything, independence is important as well as the feeling of liberation to be who you are without outside influences or projections. Most importantly that we have the right to be loved as we pleased and in a way that perpetuates joy, laughter and all the feel-good stuff Stevie Wonder sings about. There was no other way to teach these lessons than to emulate it; so I began living this way.

To date, I’ve lost 72 lbs since 2017; but I reiterate that this isn’t a weight loss journey. When I step on it, the scale currently reads 348 lbs and I have a burning desire to live. I want to write, travel, breathe, love, explore, discover, hike, go to Cuba, Peru, Haiti, Puerto Rico & show up fully present: mind, body, soul & everything that comes along with being Damali, much of which still remains to be seen.

I look back at pictures of the past and am aware that as my face changes, so do I. I won’t ever apologize for who I’ve become or who I’m becoming because this is MY only life to live. Being my full self unapologetically, will allow me to wear the hats I wear, differently. I don’t know where this road leads, where I am heading nor if I’ll make decisions I’ll later regret. What I do know is that no mistake is greater than the way I’ve penalized my body by hiding behind it; penalized my mind by not following my dreams and penalized my emotions by shying away from true love of self and others.

I bought a cute bra/ bralette for the first time since high school the other day & am sharing this picture with the world as a testament of me coming out of the box I’ve lived in for too long of caring what other people would think or say. I am not hiding anymore & 💥 newsflash 💥 I am NOT one of the guys. I am a big beautiful woman that’s soft, sensual & my love is sweeter than Diabetes. I wont hide my flow of femininity & vow to only wear dark clothes to funerals & am still so beautiful.

This life of limited time is MINE & as I unlearn all the conditioning of how people EXPECT me to show up and start all over again living a life that’s conducive to the alignment of my mind, body & soul; I can only hope to inspire others. As I learn to walk again on my righteous destined path, I hope others who’ve lost their way or themselves find resonance in my story & strive to do the same.

[letmebeallyours]

Date Night

Charles tapped the pencil against the fridge as he stared thoughtfully at the list of date night ideas. Several had been crossed out already—sunset picnic, trip to the beach, museums, bowling, soup kitchen, Broadway, the zoo, more bowling—the memories having already been made. There were only a few left on the list; he was trying to brainstorm more. There was one activity in particular he wanted to try, but he knew writing “let me do your make-up” would not go over well. He didn’t really know why it was so important to him, just that he’d been yearning to do it for months. He even thought that once they were started, Sam might enjoy it. After all, he always was so proud of his looks and paid such careful attention to his appearance. A sudden inspiration prompted him to write “internet challenges” and leave it at that.   A few weeks later, Sam pointed to “internet challenges” and asked, “What did you have in mind?” “Oh, well,” Charles tried to keep his voice calm as a thrill of excitement raced through him, “like the cinnamon challenge or chubby bunny, or… or whatever else we feel like.” “You know, it’s actually physically impossible to swallow a tablespoon of cinnamon without a drink? You could literally die trying, why do people—“ “Okay, not the cinnamon challenge. But there are others, and they’re not all life threatening.” Sam cocked his head and stared at the list thoughtfully. After a while, he asked, “Saturday?” “Saturday,” Charles grinned.   Saturday morning while Sam was at the hospital, Charles went shopping. They had spent most of Friday evening watching videos to get ideas, and had come up with a long list of things they wanted to do and the supplies they would need for them. He went to half a dozen stores trying to find exactly the right things before he was satisfied. Then he went back to the apartment to cook dinner. He still had reservations about trying this tonight, but he thought it might be easier if Charles made the evening as pleasant and soothing as possible. Sam loved when Charles cooked for him (though he couldn’t say why, he really didn’t think he was very good at it)—so maybe he would be more willing to indulge Charles in this if dinner went well.   Sam came home grumbling about the incompetent people he worked with. This did not bode well. He was grouchy during dinner, but by the second glass of wine (he’d eventually agreed that a little wine now and then would help more than it hurt), he’d more or less gotten over it. Still, Charles decided not to broach the matter too soon. “So, are you ready for this?” “Of course I am,” Sam asserted with a raised eyebrow, as though amazed there should be any doubt that he was prepared for a challenge of any sort. “What do you want to start with?” “Well—” as they discussed it, they moved to the living room and Charles began unpacking the bags of things he’d acquired that day. They had settled on something relatively harmless, something in which they both expected to do poorly, so fewer feelings were hurt and they could already be having fun by the time it really became a competition. So they each found a notepad and a pencil and when Sam said “Go” they each began trying to draw the other as quickly as possible. When their minute (more or less) was up, they exchanged notepads and began assessing each other’s work. “I don’t have a neckbeard.” “That’s not a neckbeard! It’s just…a beard. I tried, shut up. Besides, my nose is definitely not that big.” “You do have a big nose babe, and it’s beautiful.” After they’d (reluctantly) settled on sharing the win for this first round, they moved on to a more difficult task. They each had a square (or two or three, after they’d popped the first ones in their mouths) of chocolate, which they balanced on their foreheads until Charles gave the word to start. Then they tried moving the chocolate down to their mouths by contorting their facial muscles. Charles dropped his several times, having to start over on each occasion. Sam kept as rigidly still as the game would allow, making slow but steady progress, and was certain he was bound to win—until his beard got in the way. No matter how he tried, he could not get the chocolate to slide over the rough bristles. It simply sat there, stubbornly refusing to go further, until a twitch of impatience sent it falling to the floor. Cursing the unfair disadvantage, he bent to pick it up and start over. He almost had it back to the same place when Charles threw his hands up and shouted “got it!” around a mouthful of chocolate. Sam cursed again, but turning and seeing the partially melted chocolate streaked across Charlie’s face, he had to laugh. They both went to wash their faces before coming back to the next challenge. Charles had found several unusual chapstick flavors and a blindfold; they were going to see how well they could guess the flavors. Because Charles had won the last challenge, he was the first to be tested. It was disconcerting, at first, as it always was, to lose the sense he relied on most. But his heightened awareness of his other senses soon almost made up for the loss, and he always felt at ease around Sam, so it did not take long to adjust and relax. He could hear Sam shifting through the bag of flavored chapsticks, muttering about how ridiculous it was that some of these options existed (“Who the hell would want pickle chapstick?”). Finally, he must have chosen his three options, because Charles could hear the packaging being torn open. “Are you ready?” “Ready and waiting.” “Alright, this first one is easy—” and then Sam kissed him quickly, “—Well?” “You didn’t even give me time to taste it.” “Fine.” Another kiss, a little longer. “All I taste is chocolate.” “That’s from the last thing, that’s not the flavor.” “One more kiss?” “No third chances. Do you have a guess?” “I don’t know. I could only taste chocolate.” “It was cheesecake.” “It could have been chocolate cheesecake.” “Haha. No points for you. Ready for the next one?” Sam let this kiss linger even longer, but all the same— “It’s still just chocolate.” “It’s definitely not chocolate.” “Can you go, I don’t know, rinse your mouth or something?” “Why?” “The chocolate is distracting.” “Too bad.” Charles wondered if this stubborn refusal had anything to do with the beard getting in the way in the last task. “We should have done the chocolate after this,” he grumbled, knowing Sam wasn’t going to give in. In the end, Charles didn’t guess any of them right. Sam got two out of the three, but he also twisted the rules. When Charles leaned in to kiss him, Sam held him firmly in place until he’d had sufficient opportunity to get the taste. Not that Charles minded at all. Winning wasn’t nearly as important to him tonight as keeping Sam in a good mood. After that, they kept the blindfold on hand for a “what’s in my mouth?” challenge, using assorted odds and ends from the fridge. Charles won that one, getting all three guesses right, but Sam won chubby bunny after that. It was getting late and Sam generously offered that they quit while they were even. Charles felt his heart begin pounding as he said, as nonchalantly as he could, “There’s just one more that I really want to do.” “What’s that?” “Well,” Charles faltered. But Sam was smiling so easily, and it felt like a now-or-never moment. He steeled himself and told him. To his amazement, Sam grinned. “Okay. You have any make-up in that bag?” “I—Yes. Yeah, hold on.” He began pulling out the supplies, dazed that this was going so well. Sam began looking through the assorted tubes and pens and powders. “I don’t even know what half this stuff is.” “We don’t have to use all of it, I just wanted to be prepared.” Without further ado, Sam picked up a bright red lipstick and opened it. Turning to Charles he asked, a glint in his eye, “You ready?” As he worked, Charles understood why he had assented so readily. He had thought Charles meant this as a parody of itself. Sam had smeared the lipstick across his lips—and then halfway across each cheek. He had taken the mascara brush and was drawing eyelashes in unlikely places, and the eyeshadow was certainly not intended to be used like that. He wondered if he should let it drop, if he should respond in kind and pretend it had been a sort of joke all along. As Sam stood back to admire his handy-work, Charles wondered why the idea of seeing Sam in careful make-up mattered so much to him anyway. He loved Sam’s face just as it was, it had nothing to do with his appearance. When Sam took a picture and showed Charles his face (and as Charles tried not to wince), he began reaffirming his resolve. This was something he had wanted for a long time, and this might be his only chance. He excused himself to wash his face—and give himself more time to brace himself for a possible fight—before coming back to sit beside Sam again. “Are you ready?” “Do your worst.” Charles smiled and picked out a foundation. As he began smearing it on, he could feel Sam trying hard not to break into laughter. He thought Charles was just making a mess, just playing the game, the kind of teasing Sam could enjoy when it was just the two of them. But as Charles began to take more care, as he carefully worked around the edge of Sam’s beard, blending and smoothing, he could feel that laughter beginning to slip away. As he painstakingly traced his lips with a light lip-liner, then filled them in with a gentle shade, he could see the lips tighten, could feel the tension building in Sam’s jaw. Neither of them said a word as he worked, but as Charles worked on Sam’s eyes he could see a storm building there. He tried not to look too long at that, for fear of losing his nerve now that he’d come so far. When he was done, he leaned back to take in the effect. Even with his brow furrowed like that, Sam was beautiful. “Do you want to see?” Charles asked softly, reaching for his phone. “No.” Abruptly, Sam stood and headed for the bathroom. Shit. When Sam went silent, it was usually worse than his loudest fits of rage. Charles didn’t know what to do. If he followed him now, if he pushed him too soon, it could be disastrous. But if he let this anger settle, in the long run, couldn’t that be worse? Maybe Sam would just wash it off and come back and things would be fine. He waited. And waited. How long could it take to wash off? Finally, seriously concerned, he could not wait any longer. Outside the bathroom door, he heard nothing. He didn’t know if that was good or bad. Opening the door cautiously, he peeped in. “Sam? I’m sorry, I—” Sam was leaning on the edge of the sink, staring into the mirror, a damp cloth clutched in one hand but the makeup untouched. Sam did not move when he came in. He did not move when Charles placed a hand on his back. For a long moment, he did not speak after Charles asked again, more softly, “Sam?” But then at last, without looking away from his reflection, Sam spoke. “I’m not supposed to look like that. I’m not supposed to be that…” he trailed off. Charles wondered what he had meant to add—that soft? that feminine? that beautiful? Or had that been the whole sentence? “I’m not supposed to be that.” He did not ask. After a moment, Sam added, almost inaudibly, “I’m not supposed to want to look like that.” Charles stepped closer, wrapped his arms around Sam’s stomach and rested his chin on Sam’s shoulder. There was a lot he wanted to say, but he was afraid of pushing too far too soon. He also didn’t want to make light of the situation, not when Sam was clearly so serious about it. So, unsure what to say, he kept quiet. After a while, he could feel a tension building in Sam again. Before the moment could pass entirely, Charles had to say something. “It doesn’t matter to me. Whatever mask you want to wear for everyone else, it doesn’t matter. But when it’s just me? You can be yourself with me Sam, you know that, right? I love you no matter what, you know that.” He thought he saw the ghost of a smile for a moment before Sam scowled at the mirror, shrugged out of Charles’s embrace, and began scrubbing his face with the damp cloth. Charles stood back and let him. This would take time, but if he could make Sam feel more comfortable with who he was, then he was absolutely going to do just that. When Sam set the cloth aside, Charles stepped up again to pull him into a gentle kiss. Breaking it after a long moment, he repeated, “No matter what.” He thought he could feel Sam trembling a little, but perhaps he was only imagining that. Then, after a pause, Sam cleared his throat and pulled Charles out of the bathroom, saying, “Come on, I can think of a much better use for that blindfold.”

[stcrlghts]

Be Mine, Valentine.

Summary: It’s Valentine’s Day and your long-time boyfriend has planned an extensive scavenger hunt... with quite the twist at the end. 

Warnings: LITERALLY 250% FLUFF 

(also, general lack of knowledge about a “berry picking farm”... you’ll see) 

Pairing: Lin x Reader 

Words: 3,033 (SORRY NOT SORRY) 

Special shoutout to my main homie and fellow scorpio, @hamilbye, for fangirling over this earlier. I really needed that confidence boost. You’re my fave ♥♥ 

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you following me or reading this! I love you all and just picture me sweeping you all in for a huge group hug because that’s what I would be doing if you were all in front of me. 

You were unsure of the time you were woken from your sleep, but you knew it was early. Even with your curtains drawn, you were acutely aware of how dark it was outside. Shaking off your sleep and trying not to trip over your own feet as you shuffled across your floor, you arrived at the door. Simultaneously tugging your hair into a ponytail and peeking to see who was at the door, you were surprised to see no one standing in the hallway of your building. Perplexed, you opened the door to check again. Peering out into the hallway, you shivered in the cold air conditioning the building ran and almost missed the envelope with your name written on it. You bent down to pick it up and stepped backwards back into your apartment, closing the door behind you with your foot. Leaning your back against the door, you tore the envelope open. You never were one for patience.

As soon as you’d opened the flap of the envelope, a flurry of pink and silver glitter fell out, littering your floor. You cursed under your breath, knowing that would be a pain in the ass to clean up later. You watched the glitter fall, your sleepy stare catching on the flakes as they sailed through your living room. Returning to the rest of the contents, you fished out a piece of paper with a handwritten letter on it. Your eyes scanned the letter’s contents before finding their target – the sender’s name… which, annoyingly, happened to be anonymous. You decided that you’d have to read the letter to understand what it was. You rolled your eyes before moving through your apartment to sit on your kitchen table, crossing your legs up underneath you. It wasn’t like you lived with someone and the table was too many years old and too cheap, but it did its job.

You now settled in to actually read the letter, but you already understood the only person that would be thoughtful enough to do this.

My dear,

Here’s to hoping I didn’t wake you too early. I want you to get your sleep, but I really want you to get this letter too.

If you’ve looked at a calendar yet, I’m sure you’ve noticed that today is Valentine’s Day. Today is the day to celebrate you, the person I love. Contained on the second page of this letter are six (6!) clues that you should follow today. They will lead you to various locations that are important to the timeline of our story. At the sixth location, you will receive a text from an unknown number with nothing but a seventh location to meet me at.

Enjoy your day and I can’t wait to see you later today. I shall miss you while we are apart.

A soft smile pushed its way on to your face despite the early hour of the day. Lin always had a plan and you weren’t surprised he had this whole day planned out to the last detail of how you’d see each other later this evening. You felt a little pang of sadness knowing you wouldn’t see him until late, but you knew he was missing you today too.

By 8 am, you had showered and dressed to prepare to follow your first clue. You left your bathroom with the letter back in your hand, silently packing up your things in a messenger bag to carry with you. Taking a photo of the letter on your phone, you folded the letter carefully and stashed it in a pocket of the bag. You opened the photo on your phone to glance at the first clue one last time and then you were off.

____

You sighed, running your hand through your hair.

“Let’s try this again. Did a guy come in this morning to drop off a paper of any sort? Did he tell you where it was?”

It was late in the day by now and the sun was beginning to sink in the sky. You glanced one last time at your watch before watching the shop manager shake his head again. You’d spent your entire day traipsing through the city to follow the clues Lin had left. You’d been to the spot you met (a 24-hour diner), the spot you had your first kiss (the park you frequented together), the spot you had your first date (an old comedy club), and the place he had told you he loved you (back to your apartment, in your bedroom). You were now at the fifth stop, trying to wrestle the last clue out of an owner and manager who couldn’t seem to recall Lin coming in this morning. You really were running out of patience, quickly, and all you wanted was this last clue to go to the last place so you could finally get the location where you’d finally see Lin. You had guessed early on that one of his rules was to not run into you, not text you, and not call you and you severely missed him. Seeing happy couples all day had worn you down and all you wanted was to feel his arms around you and tell him how much you missed him and needed him and loved him.

The manager glanced at you before squinting his eyes, as if trying to conjure up a memory.

“You say a boy? Dark hair? Totally and utterly exhausted?”

You gave him a tired smile, “That would be him.”

The shop manager continued, “That boy came in here today, like 6 AM. Rushing around, all frantic-like. Wouldn’t stop talking, either. Told him I’d stash his letter just to get him to shut up. See, I remember now because I recognize you. You were the wallpaper on his phone and I got a glimpse of it. I’d just barely finished hiding the letter before he rushed off, muttering something about wanting to be at the jewelry shop by the time it opened. Damn boy was so tired he didn’t know what was happening.”

During this tirade, the manager bent down, searching underneath the front desk. He reappeared holding an ivory colored envelope, just like all the rest that day. You plucked it from his fingers, giving him a wide smile.

“Thank you so much! Yeah, Lin can be confusing sometimes. I’m sorry that he bothered you.”

The manager managed to grunt out a short grin, “He must really love you.”

You smiled now, casting your gaze downwards.

“We’ve been together for almost four years now. Some of the best years of my life.”

The manager kept his face still before waving you on, “Go finish this quest then. I know you must be wanting to see him just as badly as I’ve been wanting to see my wife today. Have a great rest of your day and tell the boy I say hi.”

You smiled again, “I will! I hope you and your wife have an amazing night tonight!”

While leaving the shop, you focused on opening this last clue. You spotted Lin’s loopy, crazed handwriting and smirked. You’d done it – one last puzzle to solve and you’d finished this quest.

(Y/N),

If you’re reading this, it’s almost over! I hope you’ve had an amazing time. And, without further ado, here is your final clue!

Congratulations on succeeding!

But I’m not ceasing – there’s one more to do!

This place is fruity, the place across is literary!

Remember where we pick berries!

To solve this clue!

 You knew him too well. He always talked about the date you took one summer where you drove half an hour upstate and found a corner of the world where both a library and a berry picking field coincided together. It had been your slice of heaven for an entire day. You spent half the day messing around in the library, swapping books back and forth and laughing. The other half you spent chasing each other down rows of berries and getting in various berry fights through the fields. You had ended the day completely exhausted but the happiest you had ever been. Lin often said that was his favorite date he had ever been on.

You thought of that day as you drove up, your eyes not seeing the wet snow, but feeling the summer sunshine and Lin’s hand in yours. You arrived quicker than you thought you would, given that night was falling and it was Valentine’s Day. You pulled up in front of the small, county library and parked your car. The berry orchards were covered in a melting snow and the sunset shone down on them, as if they were covered with silver glitter instead of snow. You spotted a booth sitting in the path in the center of all the rows and decided to try it first.

Striding up to it, you greeted the teenager standing inside the booth with a grin. He ignored you, choosing instead to focus on the game he was tapping at on his phone. Suppressing the urge to roll your eyes, you cleared your throat. The sound alerted him out of his trance and he fixed his eyes on you. Giving him a polite smile, you began your question. But, before you could finish, he held up his hand.

“(Y/N), right? Yeah, he’s been here. Early this morning, told me to give you this cell when you arrived.” The boy held up one of those pre-paid, burner, flip cell phones from the dollar store and you must have looked confused because, when you didn’t reach out to take it, the boy continued.

“He said you’d get one text on it and you weren’t allowed to reply and then I was supposed to take the phone and destroy it.”

You laughed then, “Destroy it? That does sound like my boyfriend – dramatic.” You stretched your hand outward then and felt the phone drop into your palm. Still standing in front of the booth, the boy watching you, you powered the phone on. As soon as the display lit up, it dinged with a text message.

Go down the fourteenth row on your left of berries. Love you. XO, Lin.

You looked off into the distant direction of where you now knew Lin was located. Before taking off, you gave the phone back to the boy, who smiled and nodded, understanding his mission. You smiled, the sky dark now, only lit by the street lights and the lights from the berry farmers. You counted rows as you passed them, finally reaching number fourteen. Peering downwards in the row, you could see Lin’s shadowy figure moving about, darting here and there. There seemed to be some sort of set-up, like a dinner table and lots of lights. You kept walking down the row, the picture coming in clearer the closer you got. When you finally saw it, it took your breath away.

Now you knew what Lin must’ve been working on all day.

There was a dinner table, yes. Circular and cloaked in a white cloth. A two-person dinner sat on it, when fine china and crystal wine glasses. Surrounding the table was a circular shape of rose petals, all fanning out into larger and wider circles the farther they got from the table itself. The backdrop for dinner was not only the beautiful fields, but a gigantic heart shaped bouquet of flowers – flowers of all sizes and colors. Surrounding the flowers and completing the heart shape were lightbulbs, ensuring the heart would shine even in the darkness that fell. And, finally, on the floor, more petals spelled out words. Before you’d even read them, you were aware of yourself crying softly, sweetly. You kept moving closer to the entire scene, finally reaching one of the chairs and setting your weary body sink down into it. Lin stepped forward, giving you one of his infamously bright smiles before taking your hand in his. You watched Lin as he bent down onto one knee and launched into a speech you knew he must’ve been rehearsing for months. It was then that you realized what your subconscious mind had realized and what had triggered your tears.

“(Y/N), am I allowed to say that I can’t quite remember my life before you? That the entire world was only black and white and you were the change that made it into vivid, high-definition color? That whatever it was I had done and was doing before I met you didn’t matter after I met you? The night I walked into that little diner and accidentally took your seat was the best night of my life. The years afterward have been filled with more laughter, smiles, bliss, contentment, love, and animation than I had ever known could exist. And, even when things aren’t quite right, I know I have you to come home to, to hold, to love, to hug, and to kiss. And I hope you know you have that in me too. I lived my entire life looking for the kind of joy you bring me. I hope you know that you have blessed my life with your existence. I hope you know that I love you like the sun loves the moon and the stars. I hope you know I will forever do everything and anything I can to make sure you’re happy and loved and treated the way you’re supposed to be. I promise to be everything you need and more. I promise to always stand by you, even when you’re wrong. I promise to always laugh at your silly jokes and take care of you when you’re drunk and cry with you when you’re sad. I promise to love you for the rest of my life. And so, my eternal sunshine, will you do me the greatest honor and agree to be my wife? That is – will you marry me, (Y/N)?”

When he had finished his speech, the expectant look in his eyes gleamed with hope, pride, and love. His grip on your hand tightened as you drew your breath inwards, working to try to calm yourself. The timing felt right, this felt right, he felt right. You just needed to find your words for the man who kneeled in front of you, holding out a delicate engagement ring.

When it took you longer to answer than he had expected, he moved closer to you, taking both of your hands in his, pocketing the ring. He forced you to look at him, his eyes not confused, but worried for your well-being.

“If this is too soon, it’s okay. I will still love you the same tomorrow as I do today, no matter what happens. I just love you so much that it can’t be contained any longer and this was the perfectly fitting next step. But don’t worry, I’m not trying to pressure you.” He kept his eyes locked on yours and moved his hand to draw a cloth from his pocket, wiping your tears dry with it.

Before you could help it, your face broke out into a wide smile and, with tears ringing your vision, you held onto his hands as if he was a life boat and you were sinking.

“Lin, I will marry you. I will marry you today, I will marry you yesterday, I will marry you tomorrow and I will still marry you a hundred years from now. You’re the love of my life and I can’t express to you what this means to me, the extensive effort you put yourself through and how worried you must have been. But you should know better of me – I couldn’t say no to this. Not to you. Not in a million years. So, yes, a thousand times yes.”

As your words sank in, Lin reached up, both of his hands caressing your cheeks, drying more of your tears. His eyes searched yours, probing deeper and deeper, searching for meaning. In an instant, you watched his emotion overcome him and, when he pressed his lips to yours with a fierce, aching pressure, you accepted the kiss happily. When you both broke away, you smirked.

“Now tell me the truth – how long did you work to perfect that speech?”

You recognized his embarrassed smile before he spoke, “Like a month… and a half. But, the guys will be so excited I finally got it right! I didn’t even have it right in rehearsals yesterday!”

You felt yourself turning confused at first… and then realization started to come in.

“Wait, the rehearsals you’ve been staying late at… were those rehearsals for…?”

He smiled again now, clearly pleased with himself. “Rehearsals for my proposal to you? Yes, ma’am.”

The pure Lin-ness of it all made you laugh. “You’re such a dork.”

Lin pulled you closer, his voice now just a whisper. “But now I’m your dork, exclusively.”

The realization of it all made you blush, realizing he would never be anyone’s but yours.

“I missed you today,” was your answer for him, a change of subject.

He chuckled, “I missed you more.”

You pressed a quicker, milder kiss to his lips. He pulled back for a moment, fishing the engagement ring back out of his pocket.

“I think you get this now.” He said as he took it from its velvet box. You held your hand out, watching the moment in slow motion as he pushed the ring onto your finger. You looked back up at him, your eyes connecting at the same moment. You spoke first.

“I love you, fiancé.”

The last word brought the largest grin you had ever laid your eyes on to his face. He pressed a kiss to each of your cheeks, pausing thoughtfully before pressing a softer, longer kiss to your lips.

“I love you more, fiancée.”

Giggling, you pulled him closer, delighting in in the feeling of his lips on yours, the way he seemed to be made for you. Under the night sky, the life you lived played out like a movie – the one you had always wanted to star in and the one Lin had helped you write. Without him, this narrative wouldn’t have been possible and this level of pure, unadulterated joy would have been unattainable.

[jeremiahandrewsphotography]

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China Travels March 2017 (Part I - Shanghai)

China: March 2017 (Part I – Shanghai)

Many English signs and product descriptions are misspelled in China; a fun game if you pay attention

I went into the first leg of this journey having a few preconceived notions about China.  Here’s what I expected:

every place to be sardine-can crowded,

most foods to be completely obscure and (possibly) distasteful to my pallet,

people to show little-to-no emotion, and

horrendous air pollution.

I was only marginally accurate in my expectations … but, there is so much more to China than I ever considered!

Native speaking travel friends is a huge bonus when traveling in China

I have to begin by saying that our journey through the Middle Kingdom was made exponentially easier by traveling with good friends fluent in Mandarin. Yes, some businesses and taxi drivers do speak limited English, but it is very, very limited. Jeremiah prepared for the trip for about eight months working part-way through Rosetta Stone’s Mandarin program. He also created and printed a list of common phrases, pictures of important things (e.g. noodles, train, toilet, beer) in simplified Chinese characters, and pictures of hotel and train station addresses along our route … I, conversely, flew completely blind and culturally unprepared.

Shanghai is vivid, busy, and full of things to look at everywhere

Here is what I learned, in a nut-shell: Chinese are a lovely, proud people. Proud of their culture, skylines, cutting edge technological advancements, photographs, and language. The more I witness and learn, I think they have every right to be proud! There are things in China that make my brain spin (mostly in awe rather than disbelief).

One of at least a dozen nuclear power plants I saw from the train line to Xi’an

Don’t get me wrong … I am painfully aware of the obvious ecological issues plaguing this vast nation. One day in Shanghai (and worse yet, Xi’an) and my throat and eyes were begging for mercy from the chokingly polluted air. Similarly, my heart sank as we flew over heavily traveled sea cargo lanes, drove through land masses formed from compacted trash, and discarded dizzying volumes of plastic packaging during our stay. This nation is far from perfect, but their accomplishments are wondrous. I believe that more of the world’s future is influenced by China than we may want to admit (for better and worse).

Jeremiah does a marvelous job planning our flights and transportation for all of

Ctrip is a Chinese website offering great deals on airfare

our trips. Through trial, error, and word-of-mouth, he has gleaned a handful of little-known travel planning websites that are huge assets if you like to travel and save money. Preparing for this trip he used an online Chinese travel website called C-Trip to book really great deals on airfare.

Agoda is a great online discount lodging tool for international travelers

His favorite go-to lodging website is, hands-down, Agoda. Travelers of all budget ranges (hippy backpackers to high-rollers) can find deep travel discounts to fit their style on both sites. We save hundreds of dollars each year just by using these two websites!

Our Hainan Airlines direct flight from Seattle, Washington to Shainghai, China was comfortable and spacious

From the Seattle-Tacoma International Airport we enjoyed a sparsely populated direct flight on Hainan Airlines to Shanghai’s Pudong International Airport. I wish all international flights were this enjoyable (and roomy)! We arrived mid-afternoon on a breezy Tuesday feeling moderately well-rested. Greeted by friends at the airport, we were promptly whisked to the taxi queue and began the 50-60 minute journey into the heart of Shanghai.

Looking down from the 78th floor is mesmerizing and dizzying

As Jeremiah is a huge fan of exceptional views, we allowed ourselves to splurged on a room at the Grand Hyatt Shanghai for this first stop. The hotel itself is gorgeous; rich woods, countless mirrored surfaces, intriguing traditional Chinese design influences, and Hyatt’s impeccable presentation.  Our room was located on the 78th floor of this staggeringly tall building.

Even though these buildings vary greatly in height, they all tower above the city streets below

One entire window wall of our hotel room faced the Oriental Pearl Tower, Shanghai World Financial Center (affectionately nicknamed the ‘Bottle Opener’ by locals), and Shanghai Tower with the Huangpu River winding just beyond. I could have never left that room and still felt as if I had experienced something amazing in Shanghai … but we were just getting started!

This adventurous couple shares a kiss under the captivating Shanghai skyline they love.

Our travel companions have both called Shanghai home at different times in their lives, so they were excited to introduce us to their local friends and enjoy the city’s glamorous nightlife. There was no time for jet lag today!  Quickly, we settled into our room and freshened up. Within two hours of our arrival we were, again, out the door.

Hakkasan Shanghai is a beautiful stop for dinner or a quick drink before a night on the town.

We met up with an intimate group of vibrant, well-educated friends for dinner and drinks at Hakkasan. I highly recommend at least stopping here for one of master-bartender, Alan’s, scrumptious libations! I fell in love with a rosemary-infused gift to my taste buds called “Jade”.  The restaurant is comfortable yet elegant.  The dining room offers intimate seating areas decorated in rich jewel tones, supple fabrics and skirted by a stunning view of the Shanghai skyline.

Club Myst in Shanghai really knows how to rock a Tuesday night

Moving on from the restaurant, our growing group cozied up in a couple of taxis in search of someplace to get our boogie on; we found it at Myst. From the street we could barely hear the faint rhythm pulsing from inside.  We climbed the wide, black staircase to the club’s entrance. Almost as if my hesitation was expected, the neon red-lettered sign on the wall of the upper floor’s landing teased, “ARE YOU READY?” I’ll admit it now … my jet-lagged brain was NOT ready for the sensory overload that followed.

Colored lights, confetti and music on an unassuming Tuesday evening at Myst in Shanghai

The doors swung open into a gymnasium-sized room literally vibrating from the music inside. Blue and white lights pulsed over the teeming mass of dancing bodies on each of the club’s three levels. The entire wall behind the DJ booth was a digital kaleidoscope of light and color, ever changing with the beat of the music. What a party!

As if to punctuate the festivities, confetti rained down on us at regular intervals. We took turns throwing handfuls into the air and dancing it into paste underfoot.

We finally slunk back to our hotel around 6:00am as the sun began to rise over the waking city.

Morning or night, chongqing noodles are an exciting treat in China

We awoke only a few hours later to the call for a brunch of spicy Chongqing noodles we were told would “change our lives”. These noodles originate from the Chongqing area in southwest China and are called ‘xiao mian’ in Chinese.  Xiao mian refers to a group of plain noodles seasoned with vinegar, sugar, red oil, ginger and scallion. Sometimes the noodles and broth may be topped with meat.  Noodles in northen China emphasize the soup base and the quality of noodles, while Chongqing noodles are focused on seasonings.

We taxied under the Huangpu River to West Nanjing Road much the same as we had the evening before. As we drove through this sprawling city I couldn’t help but think that all of the storefronts seemed identical. Perhaps not identical … but a succession of the same stores repeated in random order. At one such row of non-descript storefronts we exited the cab, entered an unlabeled, white facade building, and ordered several bowls of spicy beef noodles with peanuts and greens.

After this meal of spicy Chongqing noodles our group left full and happy

Upon arrival, there was nothing noteworthy about the appearance of this restaurant.  Workers sat at tables in the back corner mashing peanuts and preparing other foods; customers sat cafeteria-style at long wooden tables and hard, wooden benches; a handful of faded, framed pictures of various soup dishes lined the walls at eye-level, and we even brought our own tissues/napkins and drinks (purchased from the convenience store across the alley). The noodles, however, did make the world right again!

Chongqing noodles have a wonderful flavor and zesty broth

Our oversized bowls were served brimming with crushed peanuts, chopped greens, strips of beef, broth, and noodles hiding below the surface. The slightly oily broth was fiery red throughout, dotted with orange and red chili flecks. We anxiously cooled our dishes and then happily wept as the spice filled our senses (and sinuses). I am so glad I packed extra tissue packets! Even though we were achingly full at the end, friends still eagerly picked over the empty bowls for any morsels left behind.

Late morning gloom turned into rainy afternoon skies and chilling wind. We gathered with friends again as dusk fell and headed out to glimpse the lights of the city. We started the evening with a sunset view from the second highest observatory in the world, the 119th floor of the Shanghai Tower.

Standing on the street below these enormous Shanghai skyscrapers gives a small idea of their enormity

Fun Fact: the Shanghai Tower stands, currently, mostly empty. Yes, this 137 floor behemoth of a skyscraper (5 basement levels, 127 floors above ground and 5 podium floors) uses electricity (daily) on every floor, and only operates businesses on a few of the basement levels. Weird, right?!

The architecture of the Shanghai Tower is beautiful and intricate (even down to the details at the basement escalator)

Anyhow, we wound our way from the entry ticket counter (the price for taking the elevator to the sightseeing deck is CNY 160 per adult, CNY 90 for children between 3.3 and 4.6 feet, and this service is available from 9:00am to 9:00pm) down several levels of spacious escalators to the stark white, and very dotted escalator queue.

Friends having fun in front of the amazing view from the observatory floor of the Shanghai Tower

Entering the elevator meant passing (for an ever-so-short moment) over a howling gap filled with biting air. The ride was lightning-fast (55 seconds to travel up 119 floors) and so smooth. As we reached our stop, the car swayed and stalled in its tracks and sent all our stomachs to our feet. Jeremiah glanced down the chasm while exiting and stopped in his tracks. He held onto the door, swayed, and giggled nervously. I hate heights, so I nudged him impatiently forward without looking into the abyss between.

West-facing dusk view from the Shanghai Tower of the bustling city below

The mouth of the elevator emptied into a beautiful yet simple doughnut-shaped space ringing together an observatory deck, gift shop, gut-clenching simulated shattering glass floor (complete with sound), seated cafe area, and local-area history placards. On the north side, the evening’s storm whipped rain against the glass and only offered limited visibility. The southeast lit up bright along the winding industrial riverside. Finally, the sun went down in the west beyond the Bund area in a haze of smog and rain. Every visitor walked laps around the observatory taking in the enormity of the structure as an accomplishment … and the view didn’t hurt!

Shanghai Financial Building and River view from the observatory deck of the Shanghai Tower

I imagine that vantage probably allowed you to see for 50 miles on a high-visibility day. The Shanghai World Financial Center appeared dwarfed by the new Shanghai Tower and I couldn’t help but be amazed at how quickly the Chinese culture strives for the next great thing, even to the end of one-upping itself. I heard there is another tower being built in China now which will be taller than the Shanghai Tower … wow!

Admittedly, the sunset in Shanghai wasn’t nearly as beautiful as the colored lights that began to dazzle us from the land below.

Playful couples in spectacular cities make taking amazing photos fun!

The landscape of Shanghai at night is stunning. Bright, dazzling lights adorning buildings, new and old, in a wash of vivid color. What an amazing time to take lifestyle photographs of some great people! On the city streets of Shanghai, at the feet of these glass and steel sentinels we were (moments before) standing atop, the love for Shanghai our friends share came alive in electric images.

Young vibrant, couple under Shanghai neon night sky

We played with depth and perspective to capture the scale of the surroundings and had a blast creating a long exposure image of the couple hugging amidst the busyness of Nanjing Road (know as one of the most traveled shopping streets in the world). Across the Huangpu River on the Bund, Jeremiah was able to capture the couple’s favorite view, the whole Shanghai skyline, with them front and center.

Location photography sessions in an area of significance to a couple are always special! The subjects’ familiarity and pride in their surroundings comes across in the images we create … the results are magical.

Late night bites at a no-name shop don’t get much better than this … frog, fish, and spicy green beans, oh my!

We rounded out the evening with a late-night supper of grilled frog, pickled and spiced green beans, and a whole baked fish at an unassuming roadside cafe and liquor mart.  I had never tried frog before and was pleasantly surprised.  The mild white-meat flavor of frog is worthwhile, but I did find that the little bones throughout proved difficult when trying to negotiate with chopsticks … I managed fine once I got the hang of things, though.

As the city slowly grew quiet and the glistening lights of storefronts fell dark in the late night hours, we walked contentedly back to our hotel for much needed rest.  Tomorrow we would board a fast train for Xi’an and the ancient Terracotta Warrior Army excavation and exhibit site.  Although exhausted, we each buzzed with excitement for the adventure to come.

Until next time … Safe travels,

Shaunna & Jeremiah

[kennedydevin-blog]

OOC WEEK: DAY THREE

RAPID FIRE:

Tea or coffee? Tea. I get this really great tea from this place in the farmer’s market here. I currently have an iced lemon cake & a Hawaiian Sunset tea. They’re amazing. 

Stars or planets? Planets. I’m a planets person! 

Sun or moon? Moon. I love the moon with all my being. 

Black or white? Black. I look much better in black than white. Plus my cat is black, so that cat furr totally 

The zoo or the aquarium? Animals living free away from human interference. Neither, to be honest. I love animals too much to put them in captivity like that. 

Drama or comedy? A difficult decision, but drama wins by just a hair. Mostly because a lot of what I watch has drama in the title. I watch more crime drama than anything else. 

Thriller or adventure? Adventure. 

Short walks to the fridge or long walks on the beach? I love to walk, but like... not really on the beach. 

Indoors or outdoors? Although it depends on the day, to be honest. I love being outside. 

Animals or plants? I cannot keep plants alive to save my life, but it’s always been a dream to have an apartment with white walls, & plants hanging on every nook and cranny in the place. 

Time alone or time with others? I love being alone. I mean... as long as my cat is with me.

Introvert or extrovert? I think the above question answers why I’m an introvert.

Silence or music? Both, really. There are times when I just like to listen to the sounds of the house. But there are also times where I love listening to music. 

Darkness or light? Except when I’m trying to write or read. 

Cats or dogs? I know I have a dog, buttttttt.... my cat is the love of my life. If she were an actual person, I’d marry her. 

Dancing or being the wallflower? Although it depends on the people I’m with, because I will dance if I’m with certain people. 

Right or left? I write with my left hand, so I guess left. 

Werewolves or vampires? Both are good. I have started to have an appreciation for vampires because of the Lore podcast. The first episode was about vampires, but there have been several on people that transform which are ALWAYS fascinating. Literally this podcast is my life. Check this podcast out, you won’t be sorry. My favorite is this episode about lighthouses.

Dressing stylishly or dressing comfortably? I say as I’m sitting here... in my Grace Potter shirt, my Hamilton sweatshirt, sweatpants, & neon socks.

Sunrise or sunset? I think the sunset colors are prettier.

Lead or follow? Yikes, depends on the situation, but most of the time, leader. 

Optimist or pessimist? There’s no doubt about that.

Staying up late or waking up early? I say... as I go to bed before midnight every night except Thursday.

Speaking up or staying silent? I’ll often get into fights for just saying what I feel in a situation, especially if something is disgusting. 

White lies or brutal honesty? I mean... I’m a compulsive liar, but... I normally tell the truth to people... most of the time. Depends on the human.

Ask for permission before doing the stupid thing or ask for forgiveness after doing the stupid thing? Kind of neither. I don’t really do anything that others would consider stupid. 

LONG FORM:

Pet peeves: human existence. I mean, I don’t get annoyed by people often, unless they are just being assholes. Like for instance the people that ask “how can you be vegan & pro-choice” LISTEN ASSHOLE, you’re asking for a fight. Other than people asking questions that are obviously just looking to pick my thoughts and opinions on stuff apart, I am super not annoyed by people. 

Bad habits: I pick at my cuticles, so a lot of the time my fingers start to bleed.

Favourite scents (your amortentia!): Burning wood, Sunkist ( like oranges are good, but sunkist smells amazing ), my cat, lemons. A few of my favorite  scents. I also like lavender, mint, & rosemary. 

Favourite animal: Cats, but don’t tell my dog. I have a lot of favorite animals, but cats are so adorable. 

Favourite colour: Green is my favorite color. 

Favourite place to go (local or otherwise) (photos get bonus points): Honestly, I don’t have any local places that I go because the area I live in is sort of... boring. In New York, there’s this comic book shop I always go to. So probably that’s one of my favorite places. I’ll post some pictures at the bottom.

Favourite meme: ??? I’m not up to date on all the memes, so I don’t really have a favorite. 

Do you have any creative or artistic abilities? Yes, I do! Besides writing, I do watercolors. I can’t draw as well, but I love watercolors. Also, sometimes I knit & I’m learning to make my own soaps because a lot of homemade soaps aren’t vegan??? 

Talk about something that made you happy today, yesterday, this week: It snowed over the weekend! We were supposed to get 7 inches, though it turned out to only be about 4 or 5, but it snowed. I live in North Carolina, so snow doesn’t always happen every year, or not a big snow at least. I just love winter weather so much. 

Talk about an experience that made you feel proud or confident: To be honest, I don’t really know what to put here. I’m not a very prideful person or confident for that matter. 

Talk about something/someone that makes you feel relaxed: Dungeons & Dragons is the only thing that really relaxes me. I have two characters. One of them, Nico Thornbrush, is a halfling ( basically they’re hobbits, but they’re only 3 feet. ) fighter, that recently started to become a paladin -- or holy warrior. He’s only 20 years old, barely old enough to leave home, but he’s just so good... just such a cinnamon roll. But he’s dumb & doesn’t reallly believe in death. My other character though... is a whisper gnome named Ludovic Silvermist -- he goes by Ludo -- ( because I wasn’t allowed to name him Ronald without getting judged ). He’s a trickery cleric, that isn’t very devout to his goddess -- he kind of hates her. He’s all about them lies & deception to get him ahead. He used to be an orphan until a priest took him in. He has a rat named Scabbers that he occasionally talks to because it’s his best friend.

Talk about something you’re yet to try for the first time but want to: Skydiving. 

Who are your role models & why: Okay, so I have a lot of role models. But I’m just going to put a few here, since I don’t want to write novels. 

Matthew Mercer - Matthew is such a great person. I could probably go on & on about the things he’s done that have really inspired me & made me think he’s such a great person, but it would be a novel. If you have played more than one video game, chances are that Matt was a voice in it. He’s got over 300 IMDB credits. Seriously... & his fiance Marisha Ray is very involved with getting better working conditions for voice actors. Matt is that over achieving person that you just want to deck in the face, but he’s so sweet you just can’t bring yourself to do so, but he’s also an evil genius, so there’s that. He always reminds everyone to have faith that everything will work out. Even if it’s about his game, it still translates into real life. He’s created so much & done such a good job at inspiring others to create that I just look up to him for that reason alone.

Practically the entire cast of Critical Role is a role model to me in some way, so I won’t talk about all of them in detail. 

Obama - I think just saying that is enough. His farewell speech was just so amazing & really says everything about why I look up to him. 

Kieron Gillen & Jamie McKelvie - If you don’t read the series The Wicked + The Divine, I highly recommend it because it’s really good. I’ve met Gillen, McKelvie & their colourist Matt Wilson. They’re all really cool people. They’re doing what the love to do, but not only that, they have brought forward political and social issues into a comic series like I’ve never seen anyone do before. I love how these three are doing what they love, while being very aware of what they are creating & how important diversity representation is in media. I mean seriously, read WicDiv. There are themes of sexism and racism. And cultural appropriation v. appreciation is a huge deal as a whole in the comic. Seriously it’s such a diverse comic, I can’t even begin to describe. Not just with sexuality, but gender as well. I look up to them as a reminder that people are capable of change & even our generation can be pressured into thinking things that aren’t true because of media. 

Basically WicDiv is about these pop stars that are actually gods, but instead of living forever, they only have 2 years to live. Then in 90 years, it happens again. Basically, we’ve been told everyone is going to die by the end of the series. Which means my trash son is going  to die :/

Mara Wilson - seriously, just scroll through her twitter. She tells it like it is. I’m so glad Matilda grew up to be such a wonderful adult.

Talk about something you want to do this year: die. Hmm, I’m not sure. One of the biggest things on my list is to try and go to a live Critical Role show, if they have one. I think it would be really awesome to be able to see this show live. I mean... it’s live every week, but they stream from California. Maybe also one of the Night Vale shows. 

Would not recommend going on a Wednesday if you’re ever in NYC. It’s pretty scary with all the people getting all the new comics. 

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Basic Actions, Spectacular Design.

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