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everamazingfe · 3 years ago

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A Close Shave

Fic Summary: After being picked up by the Urania and brought back to the Hephaestus station, Communications Officer Doug Eiffel tries to come to terms with his new look. It doesn’t go well. Luckily, Jacobi comes along to save the day.

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Words in this fic: 2082 Pairings: Doug Eiffel/Daniel Jacobi Warnings for this fic: Brief mentions of abuse

Notes: I got into Wolf 359 at the start of this year, and after relistening to it recently I decided to start writing some fics. I was pretty nervous about posting this, but I couldn't keep it in my drafts forever, so here it is! There’s also a link to this fic over on A O 3 as the source of this post! Click it to go read it over there, or you can search up the title or ‘everamazingfe’ on the site.

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There was something about him, Eiffel had decided within the first few seconds of seeing him for the first time. His face was mostly blank unless he had some sly comment to say, some sarcastic remark, and then that stony expression was replaced by something cockier, more smug. Sometimes there was a flash of softness to it, usually when Maxwell was speaking. But even when his face was at its blankest, there was a mischievous gleam in those bright green eyes of his.

Eiffel had never really noticed anyone’s eyes before. He didn’t know Minkowski’s eye color, or Lovelace’s for that matter. Hell, Eiffel didn’t even know if he knew his own eye color at this point, he avoided looking in mirrors at all costs. But for some reason, he’d noticed Jacobi’s. Not only had he noticed it, but he had committed it to memory as well.

For a moment, he was convinced he could picture them clearly as he stared out the window above his comms panel, making eye contact with them in the reflection of the glass. Somehow, he was able to picture his face with perfect clarity too, despite only seeing it a handful of times while he was in sound mind.

“Feel good to be home?” The Jacobi that Eiffel thought he was picturing in his mind so clearly spoke, startling him out of his trance and making him jump because it wasn’t his imagination, it was the real deal. It made sense, he’d never had a very visual imagination anyway, but there was always hope for a change of mind. “Wow, I didn’t think I was all that scary, Officer Eiffel.”

“You’re not,” he grumbled with a huff of indignation, grabbing the edge of his station and pulling himself back to it, hooking his knees beneath it to keep himself there. “I just… Got lost in thought.”

“You? Capable of thought? Now that’s something that wasn’t included in your file.” There it was, that stupid sly grin that Jacobi always had when he thought he was being oh-so-clever. Usually, he was. But that joke had become played out within the first month on the station.

Eiffel responded with mock laughter, trying to ignore the way that comment made an invisible knife twist in his chest. After all he’d done, no one thought he was good at anything. What a surprise. But he didn’t have time to unpack all of that right then. “Get some new material, I’ve heard it all before,” he drawled, hoping he looked as bored as he sounded. “I’m a slacker, I’m an idiot, I’m a motormouth. Tell me something I don’t know.”

“Your shoe’s untied.”

Maybe there was some truth to one of those three things, because like the idiot he was, Eiffel had that brief moment of panic everyone had when someone told them that their shoe was untied, or their fly was down, or there was something on their shirt. And because of that panic, he looked down. It had completely slipped his mind that he hadn’t even worn shoes in the two (Three? Did those hundred days hurtling through space count? He didn’t know.) years he had been on the Hephaestus. “Oh, goddammit!” He groaned as he stared down at his socked feet in dismay, trying to tune out the cackling laughter Jacobi let out behind him that sent him halfway across the room.

“You’re also gullible, apparently!” He let himself continue his path across the room so he could push off the back wall, still in a fit of giggles as he sailed back to the console. “You actually fell for it! I can’t believe it! I’ve never gotten anyone with that before.” Jacobi’s grin was bigger than it had ever been, and he wiped the tears from his eyes before they wreaked havoc on the station’s internal systems. Maxwell was too smart to fall for a simple trick like that, and Kepler… Well, Kepler didn’t like being pranked.

Eiffel grumbled something incoherently, waiting patiently for Jacobi to get over himself before he spoke again. “Was there a real reason you came down here?”

“No, not really. Kepler’s giving Minkowski an orientation for her new role and then he needed to discuss… something with Hilbert, I don’t even wanna know. And Ala- Maxwell’s busy with Hera. So, I was bored.”

“What about Lovelace?”

“Dunno. Didn’t ask. Didn’t care.”

“Right… So you came to interrupt my very important work?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“Lucky me.”

“Lucky you.” Jacobi made himself comfortable, lounging in the free-floating bliss that was zero-g as Eiffel pretended to look busy, though his eyes were fixed on the reflection of the man in the glass. The bright light of Wolf 359 backlit him beautifully, and the color in the star seemed to desaturate everything else in the reflection, except for those damn eyes.

Eiffel let out a sigh, bringing a hand up to run it through his hair, his fingers brushing through the empty space where his long curls used to be. He let out a frustrated growl, moving his hand up to his scalp. The little hair that was left was scraggly and damaged as hell. It was coarse and patchy, and it scratched his hand uncomfortably when he ran his hand over it. “Actually. I have an idea of something we can do.” He turned around to look at the real Jacobi, who arched an eyebrow in silent encouragement for him to go on. “Come with me.”

He’d had his head shaved a handful of times, and it was usually under duress. The first time was as a punishment for getting gum stuck in it, even though he hadn’t been the one to put gum there, and it would’ve been much easier to just cut the chunk out rather than shave his whole head. The second time had been when he’d joined the military. This would make number three, but this time it was necessary, despite the fact that his goal had really been to never cut his hair again. All that length had meant a lot to him, it meant that he had control over something in his life, finally, but the cryofreeze had, apparently, had other plans for it.

Additionally, most of the shaving kits, particularly their razors, had been dismantled for Minkowski’s crusade against Blessie. God only knew where all of those had ended up, or if they were still even on the station, but he knew there was one that was still safely tucked away.

“Wow, Eiffel. I thought you would’ve liked to wine and dine your dates before bringing them home. You always struck me as more of a gentleman than that.”

“Shut up.” He rooted around in his locker, letting various pieces of uniform and whatever else had been shoved in there float freely around them as he did so. Most of it was contraband that he should’ve been more careful about getting seen, but he was too focused. Once he found the kit, he let out a soft, ‘a ha!’ And underhand tossed it to Jacobi. “You’re shaving my head.”

For once, Jacobi didn’t have some sort of sarcastic remark to make in response. He was just confused. “Sorry?”

“I can’t… I can’t stand it being like this. I can’t. And it’ll never grow back right with the ends this damaged, and I don’t really feel like cutting myself a thousand times in the process. So you’re doing it for me.” He tried to make his voice sound commanding, authoritative, but instead he just sounded desperate, irritated, upset. His hair meant so much to him, but he could stand to be without it for a little bit. He’d done it before, he could do it again. What he couldn’t stand was the sorry excuse for hair that he’d been left with.

“You don’t think I’d use the razor to kill you? It’d be the perfect opportunity.”

“If you wanted to kill me, you could’ve done it back on the Urania when I was half dead.”

“You hadn’t annoyed me as much back then.”

“I mean, if you really want to, I guess you can, but… I’d really just like my head shaved, please.”

A dramatic sigh filled the silence, and then: “Ugh, fine. But you owe me.”

That was good enough for Eiffel, and he trailed along behind Jacobi to the Hephaestus’ bathroom. Gravity was a little different in there, as in it was actually present in order to make showering and other general acts of hygiene (that Eiffel didn’t really partake in) a little easier. So he was able to sit on the counter and stare their reflections down as Jacobi stood behind him, setting the kit beside him on the counter.

Jacobi wasn’t a friend, not by a longshot. In Minkowski’s book, he was part of ‘the enemy.’ But they’d spent a decent amount of time together after he’d been picked up by the Urania, and even a little bit of time before that over the comms. Someone had to keep in touch with him and keep up-to-date on his coordinates so the ship could get a lock on his location, and Kepler had felt like that work was beneath the highly intellectual minds of himself and Maxwell, so it had fallen to Jacobi. And Eiffel hadn’t minded, because beneath all the smart remarks, the guy was alright to talk to. A little stilted, maybe, but that wasn’t anything he couldn’t work with. It was better on the Urania. Easier, at least, because Jacobi’s body language did a lot of the talking for him. Once again, helping Eiffel was deemed grunt work, so Jacobi had been the one stuck tending to his wounds, helping him get around when he was too weak to even keep his eyes open, and adjust to eating again after not doing it for a hundred days (though with all of the substitutes for rations Hilbert dared to call food, one could argue it had been even longer since he’d really eaten).

Long story short, Eiffel liked Jacobi to some degree. The guy was alright in his book, and he was sure the feeling was mutual, because he could’ve easily said no, or done a hackjob of it, or killed him. But instead, he took his time and made sure that he didn’t miss any spots, his other hand resting gently on Eiffel’s head to keep it steady despite all the fidgeting.

After the first pass, Eiffel moved to get off the counter, to turn around and thank Jacobi, but a firm hand on his shoulder pushed him back down.

“I gotta go again, make sure I didn’t miss a spot. It looked awful before, but it’ll look even worse if there’s just a tiny patch with a few hairs left.”

Eiffel furrowed his eyebrows together, but nodded and got comfortable again. As comfortable as he could, at least. His ass was already numb and the feeling was starting to spread down to his legs, but hopefully the second pass would go quicker.

And it did, kind of. Jacobi didn’t need to clean the hair from the razor as often because there was barely any left, but he still took that same slow and gentle care as he had the first time. When he was done, he wiped off the leftover shaving cream with a nearby towel, smiling genuinely as Eiffel lifted a hand to feel over his scalp. “Well? How does it feel?”

“It feels great,” he answered earnestly, laughing in relief. He didn’t hate the way his reflection looked anymore, and now he could actually believe everyone when they told him to pull it together because it would grow back eventually. Hopefully this made the process easier. His eyes drifted to Jacobi’s in the mirror, mirroring that same smile. “Thank you... I really do owe you.”

“Yeah, you do.” The genuine smile faded to his usual cocky grin, and Eiffel threw the towel at him. It hit him square in the face, but it didn’t wipe away that look. “But… You’re welcome.” He offered him a hand to help him off the counter, steadying him with a chuckle when he nearly lost his balance. “Gravity that hard on you, Doug?”

“No! It’s just… That counter was not very comfortable to sit for that long on. And yeah, I guess gravity’s pretty hard to adjust to too.”

“Well then we’d better get you back to the lazy embrace of zero-g.”

#wolf 359 #w359 #daniel jacobi #doug eiffel #jacoffel #fic #my fic #my writing #everamazingfe #mini episode #oneshot

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freyfall · 4 years ago

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Hey sorry to bother, but i don't thing I've really seen any sexism in the fandom? I might have just missed it, but would you be willing to elaborate on it a bit? You don't have to if you don't wanna

CHOKES

I’ll elaborate under a cut because a lot of the sexism I see is rooted in the ns/fw side of the fandom. I’ll be talking explicitly so don’t click if you’re not prepared for a conversation about sex and ectoplasmic genital shit. Also... it’s long.

God, where do I even start? This post covers a lot of the base issues with the fandom, though most of what OP said had to do with queerphobia. The issue with writers and magic genitalia in the fandom boils down to the fact that so often - so often - I click on a fic to read and heteronormativity slaps me in the face. One dominant (male-identifying) partner with male genitalia, one submissive (male-identifying) partner with female genitalia. And okay, I get it, some couples are like that. It’s not bad to write something like that as long as it doesn’t rely on sexism or queerphobia to explain away the choices. But then it’s... every fic. Every. Fic. I click on.

Actually, I’ll give you some numbers! I’m going to look at the UTMV kinktober fics I’m keeping up with and see what kind of ratios there are. I won’t name them out of politeness, but here we go. Out of 4 Kinktober 2020 series on A03 with, so far, 23 or 24 chapters each, here’s how the gender and sex of the characters play out:

In terms of biological sex, the majority were male/female* with two partners, making up almost half of the fics read (42 out of 94). Out of said fics, 35 had a dominant** male and submissive female dynamic, 4 had a dominant female and submissive male dynamic, and 3 were unclear or there was no such dynamic. Only one out of the 42 fics had the female character identify as a woman. (Furthermore, she was genderbent.)

The runner-up was the ‘other’ category, which encompassed the following: no genitals present, only one set of genitals present, odd genitalia (such as tentacles), or unspecified. This category made up 26 out of the 94 fics. Of the 26, 20 of them fell into the ‘one set of genitals’ category, with 14 male and 6 female. The male fics were split evenly between dominant and submissive males, and the females were all written as submissive.

None of the other categories were nearly as popular, with the next one down the line only having 9 fics out of the 94. This category was male/male with two partners. The next one, male/male/female with three partners, had 8. Of the 8 fics, all of them had dominant male and submissive female dynamics.

The female/female with two partners category only had 3. Only one of the three fics portrayed a lesbian relationship where both characters identified as women.

The other categories were as follows: m/m/m with three partners, m/m/m/f with four partners, m/m/m/m with four partners, m/m/f/f with four partners, m/m/m/m/f with five partners, and m/m/m/f/f with five partners. These categories only had 1 fic each. Each and every fic with a female partner had the female partners playing submissive roles.

It’s important to note that out of the entire roster of fics, there were 3 women. One of them was a genderbent character in a m/f fic, and the other two were in a lesbian f/f fic. Why the lack of women? Why constantly portray those with female genitals as men?

Going back to the post I linked at the very beginning, I do want to cover my bases - I understand that male characters with biologically female genitals and sex characteristics can be a hugely needed source of rep for transgender people, especially those who are transmasculine. As a transmasculine person myself, it’s important to me that male characters with female bodies exist. Having a casual environment where men can have whatever genitals they want is, in theory, rather progressive. However, three things:

Never in all my time in this fandom have I ever seen one of these characters stated explicitly as transgender. None of the fics in the study above did, either.

In the UTMV, when writing skeletons with magical genitals, having male or female genitalia is seen as a choice. It erases the need for transgender characters. It erases transgender narratives that deal with transition, discomfort, coming out, and dysphoria. If you can pick whatever kind of body you want, why would there be a need for being trans? There’s no easy way to determine a ‘male’ or ‘female’ skeleton, erasing the concept of gender assigned at birth and erasing the struggles that trans people may face.

None of the characters have bodies that might align more closely with transgender folks who medically transition. No top surgery scars, no bottom growth. No breast tissue growth on male bodies, nothing. Of course, why would that exist in the first place? Magic erases the need to portray bodies with quote-on-quote ‘imperfections.’ None of the bodies portrayed even step a toe out of the cisgender box - such as perhaps portraying female genitals with a flat chest or male genitals with breasts. None of that was found in the study, and I don’t recall fics like that outside of the study, either.

So clearly, most if not all authors are not attempting to portray any sort of transgender character when writing them this way - which begs the question, why write men with female bodies?

While I was taking these statistics, I had a conversation with my partner in which they said something that applies here:

“[Every AU character] being Sans is a problem on its own, but when you have the power to make whatever character a woman, how you approach that says a lot. What people do is that they give a male character female parts and it’s only for sexual purposes. So like, the entire existence of [the female body] in the UTMV serves only for sex and that’s just kind of not good.”

Keeping this quote in mind, the short answer to the question I posed above is this: sexism. In this fandom, the female body, femininity, and being a woman in and of itself is objectified, hyper-sexualized, and exoticized... in that order, respectively. I’m not just using these as buzzwords, I promise you.

The female body is objectified. The same as the quote above, female bodies aren’t seen as something that someone will just have in a non-sexual context. After reading 94 smutfics, their treatment of the female body tends to start looking the same. The female body is for sex. That’s it. Giving or showing a character with breasts, even clothed, is seen as the display of a sexual object, even though breasts are visible on (cis) women in everyday scenarios. In sexual scenarios, the female body is never portrayed realistically, either. Female arousal and preparing the female body for sex - compared to its counterpart, the male body - is wildly unrealistic. Yes, this is porn, and there’s bound to be realism issues, but in comparison, female sexuality is much more unrealistic.

Femininity is sexualized. Characters act feminine for sexual appeal... and only for sexual appeal. Because a character acts feminine, they’re more sexually appealing to their partner. Feminine clothing, such as dresses or skirts, are seen as sexual.

Being a woman, in and of itself, is exoticized. This isn’t even a staunchly NSFW issue. I’ve been asked if my male characters, explicitly stated to be bisexual, would have sex with a woman. My partner has received asks about ‘what would happen if (insert male character here) met a woman.’ Genderbends of male characters into female characters are seen as cringy, childish, or fanservicey by default. Women aren’t treated as a normal occurrence. When genderbends do happen and people like them, it’s often in a sexual way. “She’s so hot/sexy.” “Step on me, queen.”

It most likely doesn’t help that all of the popular AU characters in the fandom are men. It creates an environment where women are scarce and hardly represented, leading to unnatural assumptions about them.

I’m not sure how to close this off, so... TLDR; women are normal people. Stop exoticizing them. Stop objectifying the female body. Don’t use trans/queer characters as a scapegoat for your sexism.

Sincerely, a bigender lesbian who’s sick and tired of all this.

*‘Male’ and ‘female’ are used to refer to biological sex. When I talk about gender, I will say men and women.

**When I say dominant, I mean ‘in control’ of the sexual situation. This was determined by considering factors such as written personality, physical position, and how they behaved. Vice versa for submissive. I don’t intend to use these terms as an equivalent to what they mean in BDSM language, though several of the fics attempted to or did portray BDSM relationships. I also do not mean these terms to be equivalent to ‘top’ or ‘bottom’.

#utmv #sexism cw #important #fandom talk

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69420angrycrabs · 3 years ago

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20 Questions, Writer’s Edition

ty @bastetsbard for the tag :3 How many works do you have on AO3?

7 rip

What’s your total AO3 word count?

6623

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

my published fics are all vld and some really old homestuck ones, but i have several fics for six of crows in the works

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

i only have seven, so im just gonna give the top 3 lol stay still - sheith, dubious consent, E (561) burning up [wip] - keitor, a/b/o, E (208) joyride - keith/keiths dad, a/b/o, nc/dc, E (185)

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

i try to, but sometimes i spend so long trying to think of a response that i eventually forget to actually go do it

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably my first one ever? i vaguely recall rose and dave having IssuesTM. im not linking it bc im scared to re-read it

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

nah

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

no, none that i remember at least

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

most of what i write seems to be lmao its either kinky or fucked up or both

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that im aware of

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

sort of? in grade six my friend and i passed a notebook back and forth to write about naruto for a few days, it never really went anywhere. mostly because i moved

What’s your all time favourite ship?

oh jeez i cant pick just one. kanej and sheith are pretty tied tho

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

probably my fic the witch in the woods, i had some cool ideas but im trying to stick with oneshots for the most part right now since every chaptered fic i start never seems to go anywhere. i DO plan on finishing burning up tho

What are your writing strengths?

fuck idk im just vibing man

What are your writing weaknesses?

finishing stuff, for every published fic ive got like 4 or more abandoned or semi abandoned wips

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

i feel like meta said it best so im just gonna copy her answer. “If you can get a native speaker to help you, then hell yes. Otherwise, you damn well better be pulling it from a well-vetted source to be respectful. Specific words and phrases are find for extra color in a story, as long as you’re being mindful. (e.g. I usually use names of specific dishes for a culture)” and also kudos to people who just straight up make up a language altogether lmao that must be hard

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

see have you ever cowritten question, other than that, homestuck

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

stay still, i wrote that puppy in a sleep deprived frenzy at 4am and its my most popular fic. idk how that happened but can i get a hell yeah

i dont know who to tag so if u see this and wanna do it just pretend i tagged you

#tag meme #20 questions #fanfic #fanwork #sheith #kanej #keitor #vld #soc #homestuck #grishaverse #robyn rambles #jadekat

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corancoranthemagicalman · 4 years ago

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C’s (1/?) Destiel Rec List:

That gets less and less coherent as it goes.

So here is a rec list by order in which I read them and not by preference. They’re like, All Destiel, because that’s how Post-November C rolls:

First on the list is The Courtship of Combat by bendingsignpost 18k

I KNOW it’s not Thee fic by bendingsignpost that everyone is talking about. I know. BUT, I dearly enjoyed it. It’s the first in a series and it’s A/B/O. (I know. I know. Don’t @ me. Or do.) It’s pre-relationship and the characters are definitely themed toward early-Destiel if you catch my drift. Omega!Dean’s hand is being fought over. This wouldn’t matter to Castiel except he totally told Michael that the reason he wouldn’t marry anyone is because he’s head over heels for the Winchester Omega that he doesn’t even have a real recollection of ever meeting. It’s like the perfect balance of a meet-cute and meet-ugly. I just LOVE bendingsignpost’s Castiel voice. It’s such a great characterization.

I’M GONNA SCREAM THE SECOND ON THE LIST IS ANOTHER A/B/O?!? I swear I don’t read that much A/B/O, but this is another exception because it’s Biological Imperatives (Or Not) by tiamatv 29k

Tiamatv is one of my favorite writers. If you’re unfamiliar with their work, I’m gonna rec more of it to you. No worries. THIS lovely piece of work is a Beta/Beta narrative that focuses on how hilarious A/B/O tropes are from an outsider perspective, but doesn’t do it in a way that feels insulting to the classical tropes. It’s just people living their lives where these situations happen not often but enough that they know how to deal with it. Dean and Cas have several first dates trying to figure out what’s happening between the two of them. Castiel is thee love of my life in this piece. And Dean’s headspace makes for a witty narrative.

If you know me at all, you know this next one HAD to be a regency and it’s Of Lords and Letters by MalMuses 14k

Dean is the master of the Winchester estate after his father passes. Unfortunately for the estate (but much to Dean’s pleasure), he can’t run it personally because he’s at war. Not that he likes war all that much, but it’s what he knows. War he knows. Sam is a conniving but well-meaning little brother and puts him in contact with Mister Castiel Shurley. (I KNOW. I KNOW. I allow Castiel Shurley in recent fics only if Chuck is cast as an asshole, and he is :)) But seriously, it’s SO Regency. There’s letters, pining, propriety, and men in period suits. What more could you ask for?

Y’all probably gonna immediately peg who I am as a person when I say Always Together, Eternally Apart by EmiliaOagi 27k is probably one of my top ten Destiel fics.

Here’s the thing—Ladyhawke is probably my second favorite movie in the entire world beat only by The Princess Bride. (Seriously, if y’all wanna bribe me with anything, it will always be that.) NOT ONLY does EmiliaOagi beautifully incorporate the source material, but once more Dean Winchester is SO Dean Winchester it hurts. This piece is from Sam’s perspective, and his running inner monologue is both insightful and entertaining. If you’re unfamiliar with the plot of Ladyhawke, I refuse to spoil it for you. Some things must be experienced, and this is one of them. Either by reading this lovely work or by viewing the original film, you’ll understand the legend that so captivates me.

OH ANOTHER DELICIOUS ONE and it’s like in that vein of Retired Hunters But Not Yet Together Destiel is Welcome to Pine Shores! by andimeantittosting (Saylee) 20k

It’s always fun reading Dean character studies, and this is definitely one of them. So the long and short of it is PINING FOR DAYS (this was written for Pinefest) and Dean trying to set up Cas with other people because he thinks Cas might want more. Oh, and did I mention they’ve been running this motel for like thirteen years? And they share a bed? *Tropes Intensify*

There is also Dean Winchester and the Patron Saint of Blind Dates by goldenraeofsun 18k which I think some of y’all are familiar with.

Sort of what it says on the tin, to be honest, folks. Dean’s friends set him up with some blind dates and the bartender—Castiel—grips his Purple Nurple tight and raises him from perdition. (And no, it’s not a euphemism.) The dates are sort of outrageously in character and interestingly enough this is a Sam/Ruby fic too! I sort of liked how it played out in this piece. If you’re worried about the Sam/Ruby dynamic, fear not! They were both former addicts and have since been clean for (a year or two? I don’t recall the time frame.) Dean has a love/hate sort of relationship with an emphasis on hate with Ruby since she’s the one who got Sam into drugs (allegory for the demon blood) but she’s also the one to try to go clean first. I just thought that was an interesting take, and one I would’ve linked to have seen the show pursue to be honest, but Supernatural has to keep the hot ladies dead or villains or both haha ;)) I digress. It’s a smaller read but the subject matter is pretty heavy. From former religious cults to the former addicts, please keep in mind if mentions of these things make you uncomfortable. It’s definitely the one whose subject matter stuck out the most to me. So apologize if I’ve missed mentioning anything specific for y’all in the previous recs or this one.

WAIT THIS NAME LOOKS FAMILIAR!??! IT’S andimeantittosting (Saylee) BACK AT IT AGAIN BUT THIS TIME WITH The Winchester Affair 34k !!

SAYLEE YOU HAD TO MAKE IT ONTO THIS LIST TWICE. Another Regency, except this time Castiel is long time friends (with benefits *eyebrow wiggles*) with Dean. He’s in love with him, obviously, so this means that an asshole named Zachariah that we all know and loathe comes around planning to frame his poor sister (Hael) with stealing Mary Winchester’s brooch if Castiel doesn’t find some damning evidence on the Winchesters for him. DRAMA AHOY!!! This is a very harlequin/regency novel. It’s actually based off of a novel called Ware the Marquess as is the wont of the Destiel Harlequin Challenge. Very good challenge to check out; very excellent fic to read. And the author so nice we listed them twice. ;) SIDE NOTE: This is totally one of those Regency ones where It Simply Isn’t Done, if you know what I mean. Like, no one is outright slurring or something that I can recall (and it isn’t tagged so I doubt there is), but it Isn’t Done, But They Love Each Other Very Much.

So you guys know Scoobynatural is my comfort episode, right? Well, one of my favorite things that I’ve delightfully discovered is the trope of building off of Cas’ one-liner about being effin’ married, so have The Nikkah by Maxine (WinchesterPooja) 28k!

Reads like a Case-fic as there’s an entire sub-plot happening with Sam. So this story happens well within the canon despite being canon-divergent. This one does end happy!! There’s a view episode like fics I might rec that end in canon-fashion with Dean repression and I love the pining and all but sometimes I need sweet fandom closure. Long and short of it: Djinn culture? Djinn queen? Fake-relationships? Sam dealing with nightmares? This baby can fit SO MUCH ACTION into a fic.

Okay, so you know the fic with the Bee Movie allegory? (It’ll come up on this reclist.) This has the same vibe, except for the relationship is out of order and Dean is Diagnosed with If I Do It This Way It’s Okay. Yeah, it’s Command Me to Be Well by prosopopeya 28k

Human Cas, back from the dead, post-finale, and Dean is trying to figure out how to get his happy ending. I’ve seen this one make the rounds on fic rec’ing so I think it’s a bit familiar, but I enjoyed it. Even though—as my bookmark says—I usually don’t go in for hurt/comforts with heavy on the hurt because my poor heart can’t take it. This is one of my few exceptions. This one has a healthy dose of Castiel standing up for himself with the bittersweet tang of him literally willing to do so much for Dean. But it’s a Dean perspective, so it really deals with a lot of his inner thoughts.

This one is,,,, in a similar vein as Command Me to Be Well. I guess I was in a mood. Baby, Come On Home by woodenducks 9k.

IT’S SEASON NINE WITH A SIDE OF PINE. What more could you ask for angst? Human Cas in Rexford trying to make a life for himself when all he wants is to go home. But he’s also trying to figure out what home even is for him. There’s a lot of drama between Dean and Cas, because of course Dean wants him there. But blah blah angels and blah blah whatever excuse the writers wanted so we couldn’t have human Cas and Dean in the bunker. We KNOW obviously the only thing keeping canon Dean from snapping was the fact that Cas was not human around him. *heavy eyeroll*. Anyways, this is a heartbreaking read from Castiel’s perspective.

One of my favorite Rescue Cas from the Empty fics is (they'll never break) the shape we take by auroralynches (teresavampa) 9k.

There’s this super cool concept of how Castiel experiences his regrets within the Empty and how Dean navigates through them to get to Castiel. I really enjoyed it, and of course the greatest love story ever told has got to have SOME theatrics and sentiments that are definitely reflected in this fic. My point is, I really love when Empty Rescue fics include analyzing Castiel’s regrets, and this one does so but from Dean’s perspective. As in Dean is viewing Castiel’s memories and trying to perceive his regrets.

Sooooo Epistolary by tiamatv 9k eh?

I love love LOVEEEEEE epistolary fics. I love them. I’ll always read them. And I totally told you I loved tiamatv. This is probably another one for the top ten fics just because it plays into my things. Love letters, music, and misunderstandings, oh my!!

HERE’S A VERY SEXY TERRIBLE LIFE ----> Ties that Bind Us by TheTwistedWillow 13k

Okay, so BASICALLY what if It’s A Terrible Life happened in like, circa-season 13 and Castiel was thrown in with Dean Smith and Sam Wesson. Literally all that I wanted in this fic. I do mean it’s sexy, by the way. I can’t even begin to explain this fic beyond it’s Castiel’s perspective, and he has some awareness that something is off. And being inside Castiel’s head when he’s not Castiel gets me every time.

OKAY I KNOW THIS IS THE THIRD A/B/O FIC ON THIS LIST I KNOW I KNOW The Mills School for Distinguished Girls by SillyBlue 13k IS WORTH IT THOUGH?!?!

Alpha Dean Winchester is going off to war. In the meantime, his family still doesn’t know about his marriage to Omega Castiel (in fact, they still think Castiel is a Beta.) Male Omegas are very rare in this universe, and it is addressed along with the fact that just because Castiel might look different on the outside doesn’t make him any different than the girls. Which I thought was a thought-provoking interpretation. There’s prejudices here—a lot of them against women and omegas—and a temporary character death which actually moved me to tears. I bookmarked this saying bring the tissues; bring the tissues.

THE BEE MOVIE FIC THE BEE MOVIE FIC THE BEE MOVI— according to all known laws of life by sobsicles 29k sobsicles I owe you a great slice of pie.

Sobsicles, my beloved, my bestie <3 (am I allowed to say that? I mean it affectionately. Well and truly.) You REALLY got in my head with this one. This is literally such an insane read that I read it twice in a row. Yeah, whoops. Cas is back from the empty and Dean is an asshole about it because feelings are hard. Here is what I bookmarked this fic with: “Dean Winchester has issues. He gets through them. Like a Bull in a China Shop, but he gets through them. The metaphor works.” And that is EXACTLY what happens. Dean is such an asshole and I LOVE IT. 14yr me would cry at the concept of reading this but 14yr me is a tasteless bitch. This is where it’s at. Dean has so much he’s mentally working through and Cas won’t take no shit and Sam is tired. It’s great. I love it. I know we rec sobsicles left and right over here (and I know there’s a new one I haven’t read yet) but this one is really my favorite. And I know some people feel uncertain when fics/authors get popular in a fandom, so if this isn’t for you that’s okay!! But well and truly this is just one of those in the top ten Destiel fics of my heart.

Baby Jack during the Widower Arc truther here like Trial and Tribulations of Raising a Nephilim by Sickandtiredofyou 14k

I’ve seen this one rec’d before but not enough. Like this one SHOULD be talked about. Because I am a Baby Jack Truther, and putting a baby in the widower arc is my literal weakness. Dean goes crib shopping. He paints the nursery. He does that season 2&3 thing he does where he wrecks something so that he has to rebuild it. He’s mourning. He’s crying. Sam is afraid to hold a baby. There’s a lot of emotions and they’re raw. Promise there’s a happy ending, but be ready to cry first.

Another sam pov because i love my little brother Letters to Nowhere by Goodluckdetective (scorpiontales) 28k

AWWW YES. So this is another Empty Rescue fic. This one plays up the Orpheus and Eurydice lore, but in a surprising twist this is Sam’s POV!! Sam doesn’t know the full story, and we as the audience aren’t granted omnipresence for this fic either. It’s just point blank is his emotions. Him worrying for Dean, missing Cas, and wanting a happy ending for all of them. It’s sort of epistolary with how Sam is texting Castiel’s phone, but in general it is Sam Winchester wanting to save both of his brothers. So despite it being Destiel, the Destiel is almost the background ship since this story is Sam’s story and how Sam witnesses their story. It’s pretty meta in that sense, in that he’s aware there’s this grand story going on and we as an audience know there’s this grand love story happening, but we’re reading Sam’s story.

One of those i mentioned where its like an episode and they just end with tension between them >:((( but SO enjoyable and very much like an actual MotW Soul Searching by Lottiethroughthelookingglass 13k

It is in a screenplay format, but I didn’t mind that. It’s definitely a fun read! I thought the characterizations were pretty grand all-in-all. No get together though in this one if you’re looking for Destiel. Sorry. But it does make its way on to the list because we deserved a body swap episode and never got it.

This is like the third fic by tia and im not sorry and it’s Filoplume by tiamatv 8k !!!!

Its SOULMATES BAYBEEEE!!! But it’s not destined Soulmates. It’s like… soul compatibility, but only AFTER you’ve forged the bond. Self-Made Soulmates as it were. Very achingly and lovingly sentimental. Like, I think I’ve read this one four times in one week? It’s the shortest rec on this list (and while I definitely have shorter works bookmarked, I wanted this rec list to be longer ones for some reason I guess) but it feels longer. Maybe because every paragraph is like a gut punch. egGH. It’s another Empty Rescue by-the-by and Dean’s soulmark (given to him by Cas after Castiel’s Despair Confession) helps get him into the Empty.

OHOHOH LEVERAGE AU!!?! The Jericho Job by giantteenwolforgy 20k

The first in a series and I am SO EXCITED FOR MORE. I absolutely adore Leverage, so seeing this was like clearing my skin with care products I’ve never used. The characterizations are amazingly well done and vivid. They feel so unbelievably real and it makes me an eager beaver to get to the meat of them connecting as a team and family, but the slow burn is well worth it.

Yes, yes, Dean needs him, and need = love for Dean’s vocab but what does dEAN WANT and what does want mean to Dean? Find out in if you try sometimes, well you just might find by JenTheSweetie 9k

I’ve always been a huge fan of metas that dissect Dean’s differeniation of need vs want, and this whole work was like one of those metas. It’s a Cas POV of him trying to figure out how to read this man that he knows so well. It pulls out the angst and it makes me ache, but promises there IS a happy ending and Dean WANTS it.

Shush you know you want Goodbye Stranger meets Detroit: Become Human you knOW YOU WANT IT Digital Heartbeat by Chancy_Lurking 14k

MHM IT’S SO GOOD. Talk about good characterization. This work is almost a time piece? There’s a few skips in the timeline but you get the good parts and what’s needed for a full narrative. Castiel is an android sent by Cyberlife to the Men of Letters for aiding in hunting. He’s—of course—assigned to the brothers Winchester.

Shush delicious content right here mwah Heartstring Promenade by SaltyWords (agent4hire22) 17k

Another Empty Rescue?!? Yeah, yeah it is. Dean is sort of reckless. And by that, I mean a lot. But it’s fine. All happy endings, and smutty endings too. ;))

This is one of two 36-questions inspired fics I’ve got bookmarked, but the sex in this one hits my preferences too perfectly so it gets the spot and this list is getting too long to include all of my bookmarks to include both of them anyways but Seek to Know You Better by ahurston 32k mhmmmmmm

This fic is very personal to me. I couldn’t explain even if you asked me to. It might be the Florida Citrus Tree expressionism in Cas’ thoughts, but idk it's such a mystery (the way you know me) by fleeceframe 20k has got it on the list.

Cas loses his memories for a short period of time. Dean and Sam introduce Castiel to Cas, and Dean and Cas have a heart to heart. <3

A vERY interesting premise in a fool's kind of careless by Paclipas 9k

Dean is SUPER off his game when he can’t tell the difference between Cas and Not-Cas over the summer. Canon-fic.

A FIC FROM 2018?!?! WITH TIME TRAVEL??!? Ye ye it is Crazy Diamonds by pantheon_of_discord 24k

Dean of 2018, married to Castiel, swaps places with his newly dragged from Hell 2008 self. Time shenanigans and Bobby Frickin’ Singer ensue.

This one is ONE I AM OBSESSED WITH ACTUALLY And Neither Do You by callsigntango 45k like if it's not the one everyone starts talking about :((( is SO GROSS how callsigntango describes the empty and i lOOOVEEEE ITTTTT. Also plays into a Florida myth I totally forgot about so high-key freaked me out. Hahah.

#spn #spn fics #destiel #destiel fics #destiel fan fic #fic rec #fan fic #rec list #a fan fic rec list #feel free to judge me <3 #or talk to me about these fics ???#they're great #let's start a book club and scream about writers

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rogueswitch · 3 years ago

Note

1, 3, 5, 9, and 11 for the ask meme

o geez thats a lot :p i'll do Wrench because of course i will

1) what’s a Hot Take you have about your f/o?

The only reason why Wrench is popular is because he is quirky and white. You know the whole thing with fandoms only giving a shit about the white characters? I truly think it holds true with watch dogs as well. people will wax poetic about how Aiden (another 'vigilante' white man) from watch dogs 1 is the best character, and Wrench is unabashedly the most popular character from WD2 even though he's not the protagonist and arguably is a pretty undeveloped character (the actual protagonist of WD2 is Marcus, a black man, and a reasonably well-developed character compared to the others).

To bring this point home further, both Aiden and Wrench have their own DLC missions+story in WDLegion, while other characters like Marcus (and any of the other WD2 characters) are forgotten about all but to provide some cosmetic outfits.

3) did you used to ship your f/o with anyone before realizing you wanted to ship them with yourself?

No, not really. Once I really got into the meat of WD2, I just kinda went oh, and realized I had a crush on Wrench and started to ship with him. A lot of people ship Marcus/Wrench because they have a bromance in the game, but I always read it more as Wrench is unabashedly flirty with everyone, and they are both just being silly because they are best friends and comfortable with each other.

5) what’s the dumbest thing you’ve heard about your f/o, either on the internet or irl?

I'm not gonna lie, i don't really interact with fandom much so i dont have a great spicy answer for this one. but maybe something like Wrench is straight or some shit. The dude does nothing but flirt with everyone in WD2, men and women alike. No way is that man straight.

9) do you distance yourself from other fans of your f/o or their source?

Fans, yes. Source, no. I like Watch Dogs as a setting, it's sort of pre-cyberpunk dystopia where things are modern but with just a bit more complex technology (at least in WD2), and it begins to dip into why things like advanced technology can be incredibly harmful when everything is connected to the internet or links back to the government (survalience state). And, because it's Ubisoft, I do also like exploring things like my watch dogs/assassins creed crossover au, because both settings lore fit really well together. I vibe with the source.

I generally don't interact with fans of WD that much because 1) people that tend to play the games and interact online are classic Gamer Bros and i don't really wanna fuck with that, and 2) other then the occasional artist, people who like Wrench just tend to be that Brand of fandom bullshittery that I don't want anything to do with.

11) do you think it’s better to have a copious amount of content for your f/o, even with the risk of finding a lot of ship art, or better to have a lot less?

Ummm. Most content for Wrench is generally Wrench/Marcus ship stuff, which doesn't really bother me even though I don't romantically ship them. So I personally don't mind seeing ship art, and I even like some of the marcus/wrench art just because the artists are really good. When it comes to other's selfships with Wrench though, I tend to be a bit iffier and uncomfy.

I think I prefer having less content/art/fics, because I imagine that if every piece of content was ship content, I would probably get fed up pretty quickly. It can already be a bit eh now, because every other self shipper who is into WD ships with Wrench. I think its a bit nicer to have a smaller amount of good content that I can enjoy, rather then a lot of content I really can't interact with because it makes me uncomfy.

#self ship #self ship community #selfship #f/o #fictional other #self insert x canon #oc x canon #ask meme #asks #brain noise

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deltastorm101 · 4 years ago

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So, I tried to calculate Control...

... and its Epic Games deal, with the help of my certified smooth brain™ and probably incorrect sources. I started this last night hella tired and with a headache, I have finished it up today hella tired and with a headache, and this is what I produced: bullshit! :D But hey, at least double checked bullshit that’s open for discussion and contribution and expansion. Also, I probably won’t list the sources because a) I’m lazy and b) I didn’t have to dig thaaat deep down to find all this so if you really wanna know you could probably hit google with it as well. Anyhow here we go lol So, the initial thought which got all of this rolling was the 2020-wrap-up-post Remedy linked on their twitter, and Epic’s linked publishing announcement in it: studios Remedy, Playdead and GenDesign will release their next next-gen games with Epic. Now, we all know Remedy are working on some sort of Alan Wake-ish thing as we speak (right? right?? god I hope so), which meanssss our boy will most likely be an Epic exclusive. Which makes me kinda sad because, well. I’m deep in Steam’s ass. Hell, I waited for Control for a full year before I played it because they can pry the Steam version from my cold dead hands. So I asked myself... was it worth it for them? How much money did they throw at Remedy (and 505 Games) to have them play along? Would they have reached more people from the get-go if they had released it on Steam right away? Did the individual programmer, designer, writer, artist, person behind it profit from this at all? (Also, like, about the rights and copyright thing,,,,, you’d think they could have learned from Alan Wake and its IP belonging to Microsoft and so not really being able to do anything more with it because they don’t ‘own’ it and shit) buuut anyway that’s not the point of this post, now it’s time to do some MATH BABEY

Ok, let’s start with some things we know. Facts. Figures. Data. Turns out my initial question, how much money was involved, could be answered by doing one (1) google search: according to Wikipedia, Epic gave Remedy and 505 Games €9.49mio. The total budget for the game was €26.9mio over the course of 3 years of development. We know that as of December 2020, over 2mio copies of the game were sold, with November 2020 being the best-selling month ever since its initial release in August 2019. This is where question 1) comes into play: how many of those 2 million copies were sold in 2019 and how many in 2020? Stay tuned, I think I found out.

We know that Remedy gets to keep 45% of the revenue, which, I assumed, means that 505 keeps the remaining 55% (probably a lot more going on there but shhh). We know that Control’s sales cooked up €17.84mio in 2019 (so months September – December), €17.7mio of those in the first month alone (O.O). Side note: because it came out at the very end of August, I’ll ignore that month and declare September the first sales month.

We know that 60% of sales in 2019 were digital ones (aka Epic Store, mostly), 40% physical ones (consoles PS4 and XB1), while in 2020, only 10% of sales were physical and a whopping 90% digital; which is people on Epic who wanted to get their hands on the first DLC and – you guessed it – the Steam release of the Ultimate Edition in August 2020.

Which begs question 2): what’s bigger, 60% of 2019 sales because ‘ooh shiny new game’, or 90% of 2020 sales because ‘yay steam release’? The answer may look obvious, but you have to take into account the dropping price, which I also researched for your pleasure and enjoyment.

For this I used a German website called idealo.de, which focuses on looking for the best deals for basically anything you can buy on the internet, and it also gives you diagrams that describe at which point in time the product was at which exact price. This is what it gave me: - release price: €60 - December 2019: €41 (PS4)/€44 (XB1) - mid-2020: €30 - Ultimate Edition release: €30 - December 2020: €14 (PS4)/€18 (XB1)/€30 (Ultimate Editions) At this point I was like “lol hold on i need chocolate for this cuz i’ll be here for some time *sweating*”

To continue this mess™, I see more questions: 3) How many employees does Remedy have, which positions do they work in and what are their salaries? 4) How many employees does 505 have, which positions and salaries do they have? 5) What’s the total revenue that Control has generated so far?

And also some more stuff like, are my numbers accurate, am I even grasping these concepts correctly, are there even more people involved or am I just trying to explain complete crap (yes) but let’s just ignore all of that shall we. At that point I went “oh shit what have i gotten myself into, this screen does not get my point across, i need pen and paper” and you know shit is gonna go DOWN when I do math on paper.

My paper math birthed the following calculation:

Following this up, we can calculate the end-of-2019 sales, if we set the price for September and October to €60, for November and December to approx. €45:

Now, you might notice that one of those numbers is big and the other is HUGE. Why might that be? Well...

- Covid19: everyone stayed at home and needed video games to play - More sale months of the year, naturally - dropping price: why get it for €60 when you can get it for 20 - Ultimate Edition: why buy it in June when you get more content in August aaaand... - it comes out on Steam.

With this in mind, let’s see what questions we can answer: 1) 661,110 copies in 2019; 1,338,889 copies in 2020 2) 60% digital sales in 2019 means 396,666 Epic copies; 90% digital sales in 2020 means 1,205,000 copies – most of it from Steam? Some of it? A good chunk? The bigger chunk? There’s no way of really knowing for sure but... you could read this into it. I definitely am. 3) Google told me Remedy had a little over 250 employees at the end of 2019... 4) ... and 505 has less than 100. I found no good sources for this, I think linkedin said 37, someone else said 50. I’ll just use the 50 figure, idk. No idea man. and for 5) I’ll contradict my point that the Steam release is what knocked the sales out of the park and assume that the number of sold copies stayed the same across all 12 months of 2020, which gives us this:

Ok and now we’re getting into the most dangerous of danger zones because I have no idea how companies or capitalism work, so for educated people™, the remaining calculations might read like a toddler wrote them; I apologize profusely and hereby present last night’s brain vomit:

As stated earlier, development took 3 years, but everyone wanted to get paid in 2020 as well so let’s use 4 years to find out the salaries, which is 48 months. Let’s assume the utopian idea that every employee on the line here gets the exact same amount of money (LOL ikr but shhhh, let’s live out our dirtiest equality fantasies for a second ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)). Which would mean...

And now without the Epic Deal™:

Quod erat demonstrandum. Remedy has been selling their souls to Epic for €350 a month since 2017. (I don’t mean this as maliciously as I’m making it sound, don’t worry xD)

OKAY SO, O B V I O U S L Y, I have not the slightest idea what on earth I’m talking about so read this like you’d read a good fanfiction. We don’t know the different salaries across the different positions (and genders HAH), we don’t know if other parties were involved, I’ve completely ignored the sum that Epic themselves get, I have ignored taxes, I don’t know if my numbers are accurate (they’re definitely not I mean 505 must have more employees than 50), if I made mistakes (yes), and also somewhere along the way I forgot to use the €26.9mio budget figure because, uuh, I have no idea where to use it, what it means, where did it come from, where did it go, cotton eye joe - but oh well, I’m not starting over, take it or leave it.

So... I can now officially say I have written hot steamy economics fic xD Man I put waaay too much time into this but damn was it fun. Good three-hour-deep-dive (two of them spent munching on chocolate half-asleep listening to psytrance to keep my brain twitchy). Real-life-theorizing. Fuck capitalism. Don’t do drugs. Pet a cat. Wear your mask. Call your grandparents.

If there’s typos in this I’m sorry but also I’m not, I can’t be bothered to proofread again lol. Goodnight imma catch up on the sleep I lost. Gotta love full moons

#this is the first post in ages in which i used punctuation and capitalization are you proud of me xD #dw it won’t stay like this #control #control remedy #alan wake #ok now go yell at me how stupidly wrong and dumb this is i’m ready #do you think my old math teacher would be proud #i think so #my economics teacher... not so much

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toomuch-caffeine · 3 years ago

Text

Not a bad thing

AO3 link

Word count: 3579

Summary: May Parker is dating Tony Stark's bodyguard. It would be awesome if Peter didn't have a secret identity to keep. Alternative meeting fic, where May Parker dates Happy Hogan before either of them know Spider-Man identity.

Rating: Teen

Warnings: Blood, stabbing (nothing too graphic), mild language

A/N:

Originaly posted on AO3 on 31.05.2021. I decided to start a tumblr and repost what I've already written.

This is an AU, where accords did happen, but Avengers talked things out (like adults) and CA:CW didn't happen. Tony have never looked for Spider-Man's real identity, so Peter have never met him or Happy.

May has been behaving weird for about three weeks, Peter thought. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Her coming home later than usual made keeping his extracurricular activities a secret way easier, since he didn’t have to make up excuses. Besides, she started smiling again and her eyes shone, which was a nice change compared to the hollowness that followed the months after Ben's passing. So, yeah, weird, but good. Peter certainly wasn’t going to call her out on anything, especially that he also kept some secrets and may have snuck out during the night a couple times or came back home later, with some unexplained bruises. Since the conversation about May would somehow circle back to him and he wasn’t really ready to let go of that secret, he left that alone and enjoyed her happiness, even though he didn’t know its source. He shared his thoughts with Ned and MJ during lunch.

“She’s dating. She’s totally dating,” Ned declared.

“Wha… I… What? No! Ben was like a year ago!”

“Yeah Peter, but there are no rules to how long people are supposed to grieve. Maybe she met someone who helps her,” MJ flatly said, with her eyes glued to a book.

“I know, I know, it’s just weird, y��know? I mean she’s happy so that’s good, but still…”

“Look, maybe it is something else. I’m sure she will tell you eventually. And if she’s dating you can tell her that you are uncomfortable, she’ll understand.”

“Maybe she’s also a vigilante and you are both hiding your secret identities from each other and there will be a big battle and one of you will get hurt and there will be dramatic reveal, sad conversations and happy ever after, of course.” Ned sped through his theory on one breath. MJ looked up her book and lifted her eyebrows, while Peter facepalmed.

~~~

As it turned out, May was dating. Technically, the secret superhero theory was neither confirmed nor denied, but since it seemed highly improbable, it was discarded. One day Peter came home straight from school, deciding to skip early patrol in order to study for chemistry. May was home and apparently waiting for him.

“Hi honey, it’s great you are early.” She hugged him tight.

“Hi May, something happened?”

“I was just leaving, but I want to tell you something,” she started. “Sit down, sweetie.”

“Uhh, you are worrying me”

“Everything is okay, actually is better than okay,” she beamed. “I… err… I think you noticed how I’ve been coming home later lately.”

“Umm, yeah?”

“I know that it may be worrying, but I’m fine, I’m just…” She drew a big breath. “I’m seeing someone. As in dating,” she dropped. Peter opened his mouth, but May gestured at him and continued. “I know that it’s soon after Ben, I know that you can feel like I’m replacing him, but the guy I met? He’s great. We met at that coffee shop near the hospital, you know which one, they have your favorite hot chocolate, we started talking, he helped me and it began more serious lately.”

“May, but that’s great!” In reality, Peter wasn’t feeling exactly great about that, but he didn’t know the guy yet and his Aunt was really nervous and excited, so he decided to draw some enthusiasm.

“You really think so?”

“Yeah, you know I haven’t met him yet, but I noticed that you are happier, so I’m good”

“About meeting him. I was thinking, of course you don’t have to agree, that maybe he could come to dinner Friday, next week?”

“Uhh, sure, why not?” Peter blinked, taken aback by May’s words. She really was serious about this guy if she wanted to meet him.

“If you don’t want to do this, tell me. I mean it. I don’t want to make you unhappy”

“No, May, it’s okay, really, if you are happy, that makes me happy as well,” Peter quickly replied. May eyed him carefully, then stood up.

“That’s great, honey. I, umm, I actually have a date with him tonight and I have to go. There's dinner in the fridge, but you can order the take out. Is that okay?”

“Yes, May, of course,” Peter said, emphasizing the first part. “Go, have fun!”

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” She shot him a stern glance. “Bye!” May pressed a kiss to his forehead and Peter yelped in surprise and scrunched his face.

“Ew, gross, just go. Bye!”

~~~

Despite what he told his Aunt, Peter didn’t like the idea of meeting a mysterious boyfriend. He wasn't exactly opposed to that, but everything just seemed rushed. He was brooding during lunch everyday, to the point when MJ stopped rolling her eyes at him and started ignoring him by putting earbuds in her ears every time he changed the subject to this.

“Dude, just chill out, meet him, and if the guy gives you weird vibes just tell May that he’s a creep, she will dump him in five seconds.” That was Ned’s advice when the fatal Friday came. “And if he’s not a creep, give him a chance,” he said between bites.

~~~

They were going to meet at their favorite Thai restaurant. May spent the short walk from their apartment reassuring him.

“Just give him a chance, ok? But if anything doesn’t feel alright, or you dislike him just tell me. I don’t want to pressure you. It’s fine and you are more important to me.”

“I know May. I will tell you if I don’t like him.”

Finally they reached the restaurant and they entered. There was a vaguely familiar man with broad shoulders and dressed in a suit. Peter knew his face but couldn’t place it anywhere. Man reached them and greeted May, kissing her on her cheek.

“And that’s your nephew, Peter?” Man asked, looking at him.

“Yes, Peter, this is Harold Hogan,” May introduced them, her smile so wide that it reached her ears.

“N-nice to meet you, Mr. Hogan, sir,” Peter stuttered

“Nice to meet you too, kid. And drop the sir, call me Happy”

“O-okay, sir, Happy, I’m sorry,” he berated himself quickly.

Happy eyed him suspiciously and didn’t say anything.

“Right!” May clapped her hands, interrupting awkward silence. “Let’s go to the table.”

Wow, Parker, great first impression. Real smooth, Peter though. But before he could dwell on that, he was seated at the table next to May, Happy across from them and the waiter brought them menus. Peter didn’t need one, he always ordered pad thai, but Happy and May were reading theirs. Meanwhile, Peter tried to place the man's face, but with no avail, so he asked him, “Umm, excuse me si.. Happy, your face is kinda familiar, but I can’t place it.”

“Oh, I didn’t tell you, honey, Harold is Tony Stark’s head of security, you surely saw him at one of his press conferences,” May chimed in. That sounded about right, when Tony Stark or Pepper Potts were speaking, there was always someone in the background. That news made Peter’s heart hammer in his chest. Knowing someone from Tony Stark’s inner circle, as awesome as it sounded, was a danger to his secret. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to meet the Avengers, he just wanted more to keep his identity hidden.

“Oh, okay.”

“You know, Peter was always a big fan.”

“Yeah.” He felt the heat come to his cheeks. If the ground could open and swallow him whole, that would be preferable than sitting here. Fortunately the waiter that came to them saved him from further embarrassment. They placed their order and May went to the toilet, leaving him alone and anxious.

“Soo, Peter…” Happy started and that did sound ominous. It didn’t help that he squinted his eyes at him. “What do you like to do?”

“Oh, umm, I like chemistry and physics at school. A-and I do Academic Decathlon at school.”

“That’s actually impressive, kid.” Happy smiled at him. Happy complimented him. That serious looking, stone faced man smiled and complimented him. Maybe it wasn’t going so bad.

“Uhh, thank you.”

“You like doing something else?”

“Dumpster diving? And I’m in the robotics club at school as well,” Peter squeaked. This looked too much like an interrogation. Maybe the whole thing was a plot to make him confess that he is Spider-Man. “I hate the gym, if you wanna know. I have asthma.”

“You are a proper nerd, I see,” Happy chuckled. “I can’t relate though, before I became a bodyguard I’d been a boxer.”

“Wow, seriously? That’s kind of cool.”

May chose this moment to come back.

“Oh, I see, you are getting along, that’s great!” She said while sitting down. “What did you talk about while I was gone?”

“Happy asked me about school and stuff.”

After that conversation started flowing more easily. Peter still stuttered his way out, when he was asked a question directly and Happy was shooting him wary looks, but he also smiled at them and some of his stories, especially the ones about the Avengers were hilarious.

~~~

Peter and May spent Saturday snuggled under the blankets on the couch, watching TV, and eating a lot of pizza and popcorn.

“So, what do you think about Harold?” May prompted

“Uhh, he seems like an okay kind of guy… I mean he’s intimidating, but I guess that comes with the job.”

“You don’t sound so sure, Peter,” she stated

“Y’know, I met him only once and he was scary at first, but then it was better, he was actually funny and he really cares about you, May.”

“So, are you up to meeting him again?”

“Yeah, sure”

May smiled at him, hugged him and kissed him on the forehead.

“May!” He squirmed. “Stop!”

~~~

Ned was going to burst.

“Your aunt is dating a guy, who knows THE Tony Stark?! You have to ask him if you can meet him! Peter, this is the opportunity of a lifetime!”

“I am not going to ask a guy, who I met only once to arrange a meeting with Tony Stark, Ned!”

“And what about, you-know-who?”

“Voldemort? Don’t want to meet him.”

“No, I mean, the other you…” Ned was whispering in the most suspicious way possible

“That’s what I’m mostly worried about right now.”

“But he could help, Tony Stark could help!”

“No, Ned, they can’t know! They’re gonna take one look at me and see a scrawny kid and forbid everything. And May’ll freak.”

“Whatever you say, man.”

~~~

Next meeting with Happy went more smoothly. Then they started meeting more regularly and Peter didn’t even notice when he started feeling comfortable around the man. His fear about accidental identity reveal diminished.

One day they met without May and Happy took him to the gym.

“I thought that I could teach you some self-defense, you come back home with bruises too much to May’s or my liking.” At the sight of Peter’s wide eyes he added, “I’m not going to ask you who’s beating you up if you don’t want to tell me, I'll just teach you to defend yourself. I won’t hurt you.”

“Thank you. You know, I thought that you train at the Tower or the Compound”

“I do, sometimes, but the atmosphere there is too high strung for me. And most of my friends from my boxer year train here.” Happy was surprised how fast Peter learned.

“Kid, how come you have a C in a gym class? You are better than this.” Peter actually had to pretend that he was in much worse shape than he really was, but on the other hand he kind of wanted to impress Happy, so he wasn’t doing as badly as at school. Still, he found that lessons useful. During fights with criminals he relied on webbing from the distance and spidey senses, but when that failed Happy’s advice on hand-to-hand technique was valuable.

So Happy was really okay. He was gruff, he shot him weird looks, and frowned at him, and definitely didn’t do hugs, but on the other hand he was quietly concerned about his well being. He took him out for ice cream, regaled him with embarrassing stories about Avengers, and asked about his grades. Even so, he didn’t try to fill Ben’s shoes.

~~~

Six months have passed, summer break has begun, and Happy became a constant. He started staying the night and Peter quickly learned the signs at which he should go patrolling for an hour or so. That day started well. Last night’s patrol was mostly uneventful, so he wrapped it up around 1 AM. He went back home, where May was soundly asleep, showered, and went to bed. He slept in, and got out of bed at noon. May was already gone, she left him a note, asking to pick up some groceries. He went to hang out with Ned and on the way back did a requested chore. May came back home, Happy an hour later. They ate together, watched a movie, and went to beds. That’s when things between May and Happy started getting bit… hot. They tried to be quiet, but with Peter’s super hearing that didn’t matter. So Peter dressed in a suit and went out. Patrol was going great. He rescued a cat from a tree, webbed couple muggers, and was about to come back home, when he spotted 5 men dressed in ski masks breaking into a corner shop, a block away from his apartment.

“Hey, are you aware that this is illegal? You should really stop!” Peter called them out, dropping behind them and webbing one of them to the wall. The robbers weren’t talkative and didn’t respond to him, instead they drew knives and guns. “Okay, you’re not in the mood for talking, but can you put the weapons down? It’s really dangerous,” Peter teased them, while covering two guys holding the guns with his webs. He turned to the right when two other robbers were aiming knives at him and shot webs at them. One webshooter released webs and restrained the criminal, but nothing came out of the other. Peter looked at his wrist.

“Shit!” He hit faulty mechanism with his other hand, while he felt sharp pain. He instinctively clutched at his side and saw white. When his vision came back to normal, he realized that he was kneeling, holding his hands to the injury. He carefully pried his fingers off his abdomen and looked down. The wound was really deep and seeping a lot of blood. The sight of it made him want to throw up, but he swallowed the nausea and looked around a scene. Four robbers were immobilized, the one that stabbed him missing, escaped. Right now he was bleeding out and already feeling light-headed. He put a hand on the wound, trying to stop the bleeding, and nearly passed out from pain. Breathing through his teeth he got up and set off in direction of his home, already planning on how to discreetly get to the bathroom and stitch this up. He reached his apartment building and crawled up to his bedroom window, hoping that he didn’t leave too obvious bloodstains on the wall. He ungracefully went through the window and fell with a loud thud. This jostled his injury and Peter let out a muffled cry. He panted on the floor for a second, than he heard movement in May’s bedroom and his Aunt calling him, “Peter, honey, everything alright?”

“Yeah, May, sure,” he said out of breath

“Kid? You don’t sound okay.” Happy also got interested in weird sounds coming from his room.

“Ev’thin’ ‘s ‘right, Hap,” he slurred

“We’re coming in Pete!” Crap, he was still in his suit. He discarded his mask and tried to lift himself up on his elbows, but fell again, just as May and Happy opened the door to his room.

“Peter, what..?!”

“He’s bleeding out, fuck!”

Suddenly there were a lot of hands on him and a lot of yelling, but he didn’t register that anymore. Last thing he saw was May with a broken expression on her face, crying and begging him to stay awake.

Darkness engulfed him.

~~~

Peter was floating. He was warm. There was a softness surrounding him. Like cotton candy. He really wanted cotton candy. There was also beeping and voices that reminded him of safety. And he had hands that were surrounded by something else than cotton candy. That was wrong, he wanted cotton candy. He tried to move his hands, but they weighed too much. He whimpered.

“Peter, sweetheart, can you hear us?”

“Open your eyes kid, please”

Oh, eyes. He had them as well, right. He tried to lift his eyelids, but it was hard. Eventually he managed to do that and saw May.

“May.”

“I’m here honey, it’s ok.”

“Wan’ cotton candy.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll get you a cotton candy, kid.”

“Mmm, Happy.”

“Yeah?”

Peter wanted to tell him something, but he closed his eyes and the darkness swallowed him again.

~~~

Next time Peter woke up there was only May in the room.

“May,” he weakly called her.

“Hi, sweetheart.”

“Where am I?”

“Avengers Tower med bay.”

“Wha’? How?”

“Harold called Tony Stark. You couldn’t go to a normal hospital.”

“Mmm…”

“We’ll be talking about this when you feel better, okay?”

“’kay, May.”

~~~

“So you’re the kid that made my Forehead of security panic for a last few days?” There was actual, real Tony Stark in his hospital room. Which shouldn’t be surprising, because the whole building belonged to him. But still.

Tony Stark.

“Uhh, sorry sir?”

“So, a spider-boy? Spiderling?”

“Spider-Man.”

“Your aunt is currently so pissed that you will be grounded-man for the foreseeable future.”

“I didn’t do anything bad!” Mr. Stark sent him an unimpressed look.

“Sure, kiddo. What I’m interested about is why do you do this, what makes you go out there?”

“Well, umm, if you can do things like I do, but you don’t do them, when something bad happens it’s because of you.”

“Uhuh? And the web fluid? Tensile strength is off the charts. How did you get it?”

“I… made it?”

“Well, you certainly are clever. Let’s meet sometime in my lab. Of course after your aunt ungrounds you.” With that he stood up.

“It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Parker.” And then he left.

“Uhh, you too?” Peter said, gaping and not quite believing that this was just a drug induced dream.

~~~

Mr. Stark was right. May was very, very pissed.

“Peter, do you understand what happened? You were dressed in that ridiculous costume, stabbed and bleeding out! And we can’t call an ambulance, because a normal hospital won’t help an enhanced person!”

“May, listen…”

“No! You listen!”

“But…”

“How could you do this to me! Especially after Ben! Do you even understand…”

“With the great power comes the great responsibility!” Peter interrupted and continued in sobs, “He said that. And I couldn’t… I had these powers, but I didn’t… I… It’s my fault… I will do this for him!” He shouted. Something flickered and softened in his aunt's face.

“Okay,” she said defeated. “It’s okay, sweetheart. I won’t yell at you anymore. It’s alright, it’s alright.” She grabbed him, pulled him into a hug and started rocking them lightly.

“Everything is gonna be okay, hon.”

~~~

After a couple of days Peter was cleared by Dr. Cho and Bruce Banner, (he still couldn’t believe that he met some of his favorite scientists), to leave med bay. Happy brought him to the elevator that went up to the penthouse. They entered a large living room, but Peter didn’t have time to marvel at the view or very elegant and certainly expensive décor, because Happy steered him straight to the couch, where his Aunt and Mr. Stark sat with stern expressions. Peter looked at the adults around him with uneasiness.

“Peter-” his Aunt May began, “-I don’t approve that you’ve been sneaking out to fight criminals for about a year.”

She made a stopping gesture at the sight of Peter’s opening mouth.

“But, I see that you have a fairly good reason for that, so after a lot of consultations and thinking, I decided that I am going to allow this.

“However, there are going to be some rules,” she quickly added. “Also you are grounded for the rest of summer break.”

“What, May, you can’t! Ned and I…”

“I am your legal guardian, that means that I can and I will.”

Peter was only allowed to patrol in a special suit that he was going to make with Mr. Stark. Until the suit was finished and tested in the Tower’s gym he was forbidden from going out as Spider-Man. May also took his phone and computer for a week and gave him a long list of tasks to complete that took almost all of the time (“But May, we never clean the top of kitchen cupboards!” “Yeah? Maybe it’s time to start. Use your powers to do something useful at home!”). After that he started spending most of his time at the Tower training or working on a suit (“This isn’t a reward, Peter. We just don’t trust you to leave you alone and unsupervised without anything to do.”). He even got permission to invite Ned to the Tower.

This isn’t bad, he thought as he entered Mr. Stark’s workshop for the first time. This is actually better than great.

A/N: So there's other loosely connected fic in this series on my AO3 that I'm going to repost on tumblr tommorow and a direct sequel that's mostly written and I'll publish soon.

#marvel #mcu fanfiction #spiderman #fanfiction #happy hogan #may parker #peter parker

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slashedthroughtheheart · 4 years ago

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Commission prices!

Heya~ Local cryptid writer here with my do’s and don’ts!

First, any word count estimates will be given after I receive a prompt and I will check with you if that estimate fits what you want! We can negotiate it to be less if that’s what you need/can afford. Either way, I will write to the word count every time.

However, if I go over estimate word count, you will not be charged extra. Sometimes the muse decides how long a fic actually is despite clear goals set close. If you love it, you can always leave me a tip but don’t feel pressured just because a plot what plot/porn without plot turned out to have some plot in it because I got carried away.

Currency is in USD

Flat rate for a full one shot fic (1k): $10

Flat rate for a full one shot fic (2k): $15

Flat rate for a full one shot fic (3k): $20

Flat rate for a full one shot fic (4k): $25

Flat rate for a full one shot fic (5k): $30

I do longer fics than this all the time, but when writing for stuff I’m not personally into, this is about the cap I’d be able to get to. If you give me a prompt that aligns with my own interests, you can likely expect an Over the Estimate fic, but I will try to stick to within 1k words of the estimate.

Additionals/Add ons for fics!

If you don’t have a prompt, but have a character and general kink/idea in mind, I can write a prompt and send it to you for approval before I start a fic. The first time will be free, but if I have to think of a different prompt than the initial sent, it will be an additional $5 if I do write the fic out.

For all characters you will be asked if you want My headcanons for them. If you would like to feature your own headcanons that are Major changes (Ie: If you think someone is a sub rather than a dom like I think or vice versa) then you will pay $3 extra. If it’s something minor like a trans headcanon, no extra charge!

Stories featuring OCs: Add $5 to one of the flat rates if it is an OC I have done before. If it is a new one, Add $8 since the work of learning a new character is a lot to handle.

Adding another sex scene to any 18+. One is included, but if you want a second separate scene, add $3

If you wanna read some of my works, you can go to my Ao3 at HaruyamaYuri or look around this blogs My Writing tag.

If you would like a quote/estimation of price for a commission, dm me! And if you’re not certain if I write for a character, you can also pop in for one of those!

Please come ready with your prompt, even if it’s just a basic idea and what you want included and how you think it might go down. It’ll help me give a better estimate if you have a fully fledged idea for me to think about and work with!

What I WON’T write: Incest, vomit, hard vore, scat, zo//o/philia, non-con (consensual non-con and some dub-con is okay on a case by case basis) anyone under 18 and I don’t age up! I have a fic of Max Thompson Jr when he was younger, but he is still 18 and in canon he is very much of age when we personally get introduced to him, so aging him down to 18 was needed for the story to work because of timelines. If your character starts as an adult but you want them younger, 18 is my limit at how young they can get unless it is 100% a sfw/non-sexual fic. If you aren’t sure about me being okay writing a kink, just dm me and ask! I’d be happy to let you know!

So far, this blog is only for slashers and the killers from Dead by Daylight. I am mainly into Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, both Leatherface’s, and most of the male killers from DBD. I can write for the female ones, but I’m much more comfortable writing for male slashers/killers. If you’re wondering if I’ll write for a specific character, just dm me! I could likely write for your character given a bit of time and learning the source material well enough.

Relationship combos I do: Canon/reader is my bread and butter, but I can do canon/canon or canon/OC. And if given enough source material/references, I could do OC/reader. I don’t want to say I’d do OC/OC because I have to have some kind of frame of reference to start from and not knowing either personally would be difficult for me. If you want a pairing with an OC in it at all, you need to be ready to answer any questions I come up with during the writing process if I can’t figure it out from the references you give me.

I’ll start by having slots for fics so everyone can see if there’s any available. However, I can create a waitlist if needed! So don’t be afraid to dm me even if the slots are full!

I will communicate through the whole process of writing your commission. If something comes up in my life that will delay anything, I will let you know. Usually, I can finish a long fic of about 5k words within 2 or 3 weeks if it’s not something I’m personally into. So most fics will be out within 2 to 3 weeks. I may need breaks between fics, and I will always keep people updated on that!

Payments accepted: Paypal and Cashapp. If paying through cashapp, we can discuss that in DM. Paypal link will be added to my bio, but I can also send it in dms as well!

Waitlist info: If you do not respond to me letting you know I’m ready to take your prompt within 48 hours I’ll go down the list to the next person! If you are more easily accessible on a different social media, you can share that with my via dm and I can do my best to contact you there when a spot opens up as well as dms here on tumblr. You can always dm me back if you missed your window to keep you in the rotation! And don’t worry about telling me to skip you or that you don’t want the fic anymore for whatever reason! There is zero pressure!

#Commissions #writing commissions #commission page #fic commission #dead by daylight

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ellana-ravenwood · 6 years ago

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“Wanna Join ?” Part 2/2 - Jason Todd x Reader x Roy Harper (erotica)

And here as promised, part 2 of this little dirty polyamorous fic of mine. If you haven’t read part 1, link down below :-). And hum...I don’t have much to add, hope you’ll like it !

FINISHED SERIES : PART 1

IMPORTANT WARNING : THIS IS EROTICA ! THIS IS NOT FOR YOU IF YOU ARE UNDERAGED, I GODDAMN MEAN IT. Like there’s cute and sweet feelings in the mix, but also...smut, so if you’re not 18 or more, or if you’re not comfortable with that sort of things etc etc, this story ain’t for you. I have tons of other very SFW story, for averyone to read, and if you wanna check those out instead, it’s right here, on My masterlist blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives.

_________________________________________________

Jason Todd was happy.

Right here, right now.

In fact, he doesn’t remember feeling that happy ever in his life...

Maybe before his death, when he was just a carefree kid and Bruce asked him if he could officially be adopted ?

The feeling, in his little nine years old heart, to finally belong, to finally have a real family that cared about him...It was overwhelming at the time.

Of course, things were cut short, ruined by that psychopathic clown, who killed him when he was fifteen. And by R’as Al Ghul, who wouldn't let him rest and brought him back...

Since he came back to life, Jason couldn’t recall being THAT happy.

He found new friends, forgave his father, bonded again with his family (becoming quite a protective yet cool older brother to Tim, and more recently, to Damian, finally making progress with him...Finally wanting to make progress with him), learned how to live again etc etc...

But there was always that gloominess in him. That sadness of being let down. Abandoned by his father, the only person he always thought would never let him go...

The constant feeling of not being important enough followed him everywhere, this pain dragged him down for so long...

Until he met you and Roy.

At first, he was such an ass to the both of you, but you stuck around anyway. You didn’t let him push you away...and before he knew it, Roy and you were the reasons he felt happier sometimes, just by being with you.

Before he realized it, he had fallen hopelessly in love with you.

With both of you...

And then you two started dating, and he thought it would be the end. Over. That he would have to burry his feelings deep down and watch you two be happy from a distance. That once more, he wouldn’t belong anywhere.

But one day...One day you invited him to join in on your sexy time, and after a few months of fun, of incredible sexual experience...you realized you were all in love with each others.

Polyamorous.

That’s the word Jason used. And how lucky was he, to have fallen desperately in love with his best friends who discovered they too, were poly ?

Very lucky.

So sure, at first it had been a mess of misunderstandings and hurt, but things cleared pretty rapidly !

After Roy thought Jason was trying to steal you away from him, you caught up with him and came back to the apartment, where Jay proceeded to explain himself.

He remembered how he was afraid because if you guys didn’t share his feelings...he could ruin everything. You’d never abandoned him of course, but it would never be the same again.

And now...

No Jason Todd was happy.

Here. Right here.

That night, he fell asleep in the best spot.

In the middle.

Your head was in the crook of his neck, and one of your leg was thrown around his waist, as you were cuddled against him, your warmth spreading to him pleasantly.

Roy was sleeping on his belly, his body also against Jason’s. One of his arms was laying comfortably across the Red Hood’s chest, fingertips touching you side softly.

And though this position might sound uncomfortable to a lot of people, sandwiched the way he was...Jason lived to feel you guys’ naked bodies against him.

Jason Todd was happy. Here. Between you two.

He was thinking about just that when...he felt like something was wrong.

Yours and Roy’s skin felt...weirdly sweaty and sticky. Not like it should have felt. It was slimy and warm and...It was blood.

Jason sat up in a panic, and shook both of you, but he already knew...he already knew by the empty look in your eyes, by the sudden coldness of your skin, by the amount of blood all around you...You and Roy were dead.

You had left him behind, you were gone, forever. What happened ?!

He...he...He woke up, screaming at the top of his lungs.

************

Jason felt as if he was back in time. When he was eight, and just started to live at Wayne manor’s. When he was all alone in this huge bedroom.

He used to have vivid dreams about his mother’s murder...And used to wake up screaming, just like right now. And each time, Bruce would come running, and would be there for him until he fell asleep.

And though Jason was far from being a kid now...Bruce came in when he heard his (adult) son scream in his sleep. It was mainly just a reflex. Tim and Damian still lived at the Manor, and sometimes they had nightmares.

They were still young enough to appreciated their father rushing in their room to reassure them, to be there for them. And so when Bruce was woken up by a scream...He followed his father instincts and went to the source of the scream, knowing it was one of his boys.

But half asleep, he didn’t realize that said scream came from one of his oldest son...Jason came back to live in the manor shortly after the huge fall out he had with you and Roy. He just didn’t want to stay alone in an apartment, he couldn’t stay alone in an apartment so...He moved back to his old home.

It has been a while, since he lived there. But of course, Bruce and Alfred welcomed him with open arms. And the old butler got his old room in order, with the help of a rather excited Tim (he always admired greatly Jason) and the reluctant help of Damian (who was actually pretty excited too...it meant he could randomly start fights in the corridor with someone else than Drake !).

It was a bit weird, to be back in that huge room...Some of his old stuffs that he didn’t take with him, and that were there since before his death brought memories back to his mind. Of times when it was just him and Bruce. Of Dick and him fighting, but ultimately become close brothers. Of finding a new family. Of Bruce being proud of him because he had good grades at school. Of roaming the mansion with Dick, up to no good. Of scaring Alfred by jumping all around expensive furnitures (though the butler was scared for his well being more than said furnitures). Of Alfred’s cucumber sandwiches...

It was a bit weird, but he realized it was exactly what he needed.

After the heartbreak he just went through. After loosing his two best friends, but also ruining their relationship...

He needed his home. His family. To not feel completely abandoned again.

And as Bruce, his father, half-asleep, came running into his room already saying :

“It’s alright boy, I’m here.”

Jason felt a bit better...But then his dad realizes it’s neither Tim nor Damian. It’s one of his grown ass kid. And he just stands there, between the door and his bed, not really sure of what to do.

He reconnected with Jason not so long ago, and he fears that him barging in after he had a nightmare might be too much for him. Might make painful memories of his father abandoning him (Bruce would never forgive himself, but he had his reason, and Jay finally understood them) resurface for some reasons...maybe some childhood memories that were too painful to think about.

And this was the last thing Jason needed. After what he just went through...

So Bruce stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do next, until he realized...Until he realized Jason was crying.

And once again, his father instincts kicked in. Especially since he never saw Jason cry...And so he goes to him, sits next to him, and holds him. Just like he used to do when Jay was eight...And he listens.

He listens to his heartbroken son, to his shattered boy...And he doesn’t let go.

************

Roy is angry.

Lately, he’s always angry.

Maybe it’s a way of ignoring that lingering pain inside him, the one that threatens to destroy him if he stops being so furious ?

But as Oliver Queen aka Green Arrow watch upon his ex-sidekick bashing a random low life head’s in...This has to end.

It’s not like his Roy to loose it like that. Especially not since he met you and Jason. He became a collected man, that always thought things through and..it just wasn’t his thing to use mindless violence.

And it was tarnishing his name. And by the same occasion, Green Arrow’s. Not that Oliver cared much, no. He didn’t give a shit what people thought of the Arrows right now, he just wanted Roy to feel better.

But it was dangerous. There was a high chance of him just getting mad and blowing everything up, telling Oliver to never talk to him again (right when they were reconnecting again at that !).

However, the archer was ready to risk it all. For the boy’s sake...He chuckled. The boy ? But Roy wasn’t a boy anymore. Or things would be easier.

When he was a boy, the one they used to call “Speedy” used to drink everything his mentor said, used to admire him so much and follow everything he taught him...Which is probably the source of their downfall. Of why he felt so betrayed and all when...But this was the past.

Right now, he needed him.

“You know, I think he understood your point...”

Oliver said, walking slowly toward Roy who was just about finishing beating up that low life drug dealer. The red archer turned around and...Had the opposite reaction Oliver was expecting.

He was waiting for Roy to burst in anger, to tell him to go fuck himself. He was almost expecting to fight him in order to calm him down ! But this ? This was a surprise.

Roy let go of the collar of the criminal he was holding, and the man fell back down limply, definitely knocked out. He looked at his former mentor as if he was an hallucination, or a dream, and seemed to come out of a daze and...

He sat down on the floor, or rather, fell down, sunk down on the floor. And his head fell in his hands. He didn’t say anything. He just...looked defeated.

And Oliver never saw, even at his worst, Roy look defeated...Almost shocked, he walked toward him and sat down beside him.

Roy jumped in the air a bit, as if he already forgot that Green Arrow was here and he looked at him curiously, but a lingering suffering was there, behind his eyes. And then, with a weak voice so unlike his normal one, he said :

“I lost her Oli’. I lost both of them”.

Oliver Queen didn’t need to ask who he was talking about. He knew.

Anyone who had seen those three together knew that if for whatever reason they had a fall out, it would be bad. For all three of them.

They seemed so close, even after Roy started to date you...

Oliver laid a hand he wanted consoling on his former sidekick’s shoulder, and was about to say something but...nothing could have prepared him for the flow of words that came out of Roy’s mouth.

He hadn’t talk to him that much in years ! And so Green Arrow stayed there, sitting next to him, and listened.

************

Your heart tightened as you looked upon the last picture that you took all together. You were all so happy then...Or so you thought.

Because if everything went as fine as you thought, then why would Jason decide to kiss you and tell you he loves you ? ...

The picture was taken by him, with his phone. He was a bit in front of you, smiling and making a stupid peace sign, while you and Roy were making silly faces and...You hid the photo, shoving it in your backpack.

It hurt too much to see it. Especially since you hadn’t seen any of them for now almost two months, had no news whatsoever and...Had those impossible feelings for both of them.

It’s funny, that it took Jason deciding to kiss you and tell you he loves you for you to realize what has been there all along.

That you were in love yes...with both of them.

Which is why you so often let Jason in on your intimate moment with Roy...After all, you were the one that initiated the all thing with your simple : “Wanna join ?”

But the way you grew up, the way society worked...You thought it was actually impossible to be in love with more than one person at once, and so you convinced yourself that what you felt for Jay was just a very strong friendship, and you were just in love with Roy.

You convinced yourself you were “normal”, that you just had a regular love story, with only two people in it...Only it has never been “normal”.

Because from day one, Jason was always there. And then when he joined in on your sex session...You should have known it was coming.

The disaster. Things were going too well, and yet not well enough.

Because every time you finished having sex with each other, you craved for Jason to stay too and...You shook your head.

What was the point in remembering and pondering all those thoughts now ? It was too late. You should have never told Jason to join, and stay the way you all were...At least, you would still be together.

And sure, it would have mean repressing a lot of feelings but...you’d still have them. Not like now, as you were in your now empty old apartment (empty of them), gathering a few things you had never dared to come get back before now.

In case you ran into one of them, you know ?

Because you couldn’t face Jason nor Roy, for reasons you weren’t too sure of...Maybe you were afraid of further rejection ? Of fighting and therefor definitely ending everything between all of you ? Maybe...

You didn’t really know, and you weren’t quite ready to delve into your feelings like that, to psychoanalyse yourself just yet.

You were about to leave the apartment when...You heard a noise coming from Jason’s bedroom.

For some reason, you were sure it wouldn’t be Jason himself, because it seemed like he was avoiding you too lately (which was good), and went back to live at Wayne’s Manor. So in your head, it was most likely an intruder and you’d be damn if you’d let an intruder come into your house ! Even if nowadays, it wasn't really yours anymore...At least, it didn’t feel like home without Jason and Roy.

So when you barged in Jason’s room, ready to fight whatever stranger came in, your surprise was huge to discover that it was...Actually Jason.

You stared at each others for a bit, not really knowing what to say.

“You um...look well.”

Jason finally broke the silence, and it brought you back to your senses. In a small voice you answer :

“Yeah well I’m...Well. You look...Alright too.”

Another silence, but it seems like none of you want to leave the room. In fact, you feel a sudden urge to stay, and to talk more to him. To work things out. To try and understand why he did what he did when he did it. To try and understand your own feelings...After all, you still love him too.

And Jason ? Jason doesn’t want to go out either. He wants to explain. He wants to tell you everything, as finally you’re not running away...

He originally came in just go grab some of his stuffs from his room, coming through the window as an old habit, and definitely didn’t expect you to be there. Not after two months...And yet. Yet here you were.

And here he was.

His chance to explain everything. To tell you how he truly feels. To maybe convince you to go after Roy ! And if you don’t love him back ? Well it was alright, he’d settle to see you and Roy happy...It’s all he ever wanted really.

The two people he was oh so desperately in love with to be happy.

You both speak at the same time.

“(Y/N)/Jason I...Oh, you first !”

And then you chuckle, and it’s been months since any of you laughed...

You take a step towards him, and he takes one towards you. And as both of your minds’ are overflowing with what you should say, with what you should admit to each other...Everything crumbles away when you’re just a few inches from each other.

Because the attraction is too strong. It always had been too strong.

And you both resolve to say everything later, as he catch you in his arms and your mouth are looking for each other...Find each other.

Your arms wind up around his neck, and he holds you close, his own arms wrapping around your waist. And before you realize it, both your lips part and your tongues dance around each other, as you press even further in his body. And he...

“I can’t fucking believe it !”

A cold chill ran in your vein, as you quickly get away from Jason (even if you don’t want to), and he does the same. You both turned around and...are faced with Roy, a sport bag on his shoulder.

It seemed like today, all of you thought it was a good time to come back and get some stuffs...But after all, it had been two months, it was suppose to be “safe”.

You’re about to say something, and you can see Jay is too, but Roy shuts you both down by continuing :

“I can’t...But I should know. Of course, with me out of the picture, you both had the way free to each others !

“Roy it’s not...”

“Shut up ! Both of you ! ...I came here because I saw some lights. And because I needed to take a few things. I came here knowing one of you would be here, and to talk. To not leave things like we left them. And what do I find ? My best friends, whom I thought would never betray me, doing exactly that. Again.”

Roy let his bag slip off his shoulder and walks toward you. By instinct, Jason takes a step back, afraid to get punched again like last time. But Roy stops a few feet from both of you and says :

“You know, I’d never think EVER in my life that you two would...Do something like that. I...I love you. I love you both so much ! And you’d do that to me ? Why didn’t you just tell me you wanted to be together ?! I would have accepted it ! It would have hurt, yes, but I would..I wouldn’t feel so betrayed. So left out. And it was the least you could do...”

It was interesting, the way he was talking about both of you, not addressing his speech to only one person. And did he say...He loves you “both so much” ?

“I don’t understand why you would do that. I just don’t...get it. I thought I could trust you. I thought I...I...”

His voice break, and you and Jason take the few steps that separate him from you, but as he notices, he walks backwards.

“Don’t touch me. Don’t come near me. Not after what you’ve just done !”

It hurts. It hurts so much, the way he walks away, fear in his eyes. Fear that you’d break his heart further...

Roy doesn’t want to hear you say that you love each other. That you’re going to date from now on. He doesn’t want to hear you say that everything between you and him was fake. He...He doesn’t want to hear any excuses.

There’s a silence, once again broken by Jason :

“I’m sorry. I...Ruined everything. As usual. I...The day you caught us, two months ago...I was about to tell you guys my big confession. The thing I hid for so long and couldn’t hold in anymore. Not after all this time spend in each others’ arms. I...”

“Let me guess Jason. Said confession is that you love her ? That you love (Y/N) ? Since when ugh ? Did you love her already when we invited you to join in on our fun ? Did you join in just because of that ? After all, it’s true that during our sex session you always paid more attention to her ! I thought, like you always said, that sex was just fun ugh ? That it meant nothing ? And so what now Jason, it does because you love her ?!”

The Red Hood flinches a bit as his friend reminds him of what vision he had of sexual relationships before meeting them. It’s true that, whenever he slept with someone, it used to only be fun but...With them ? Ever since that first night he joined you guys ? It was never fake.

It was never just pleasure. It was...So much more. For him, at least.

Roy seems to be on a streak of words as he keeps going, talking again about how betrayed he feels and how as soon as Jason joined he felt like he didn’t matter as much as he used to. How Green Arrow himself told him that this all situation was shitty. How...

“Oh shut up will ya ?! Let us talk too !!”

Jason says a bit harshly. Roy turns to him and anger, but also pain cross his feature as he says :

“How dare you ? How dare you say such a thing to me while you’re the one that...”

And Jason doesn't think. It’s the first thing that comes to his mind to shut him up.

He grabs him by the back of his neck and crashes his mouth on his, kissing him fiercely and passionately. And Roy...kisses back.

They separate and look at each other, an intensity that wasn’t there before burning in their eyes. But neither of them forgot you, and they turn to you.

They were expecting to see you hurt, even maybe crying or something, as you witnessed both of them kissing very eagerly. But...No.

You look...Turned on. Because your brains sometimes works faster than theirs and you figured things out. And you’re relief. Oh so relief.

You walk to them, and stop right in front of them. Jason’s hand is still behind Roy’s neck, and they’re both so close...You walk in.

In that little circle.

And you lay one kiss on Jason’s lips, and one kiss on Roy’s. It’s funny, they both taste like the other one...You cup their cheek, and despite the turmoil of feelings in their belly, they lean into your touch.

“We are all...Such idiots.”

You finally say, and it seems like the tension that was raised to the max since Roy came in suddenly deflated. Suddenly disappeared.

You all walk a little appart, and you continue :

“It’s...Almost to good to be true. And yet...Jason, do you love me ?”

“Yes.”

The man answer, without an ounce of hesitation.

“Roy, do you love me ?” you ask.

“...Yes.”

He says, albeit a bit slower than Jason, as he’s still unsure what to feel right now. You keep going :

“Jay...Do you love Roy ? And I mean, love beyond our friendship ? ”

There’s a small silence. Jason looks at you, unsure, and afraid to show his real him. His true feelings.

But his father’s words came back into his mind. “Don’t hide yourself, be who you are. And don’t be like me, show the people you love you love them, whenever possible, because they’ll be gone before you realize, and you end up realizing you never told them what you really felt...”

And so he says, firmly, sure of himself :

“Yes.”

You smile tenderly, glad that you understood what was happening with him. But now, you turn to Roy, and there..You’re not quite sure he’s like you and Jason. Not quite sure he can accept that, not quite sure he can love both of you.

And from his answer, everything could change. In two ways.

If he says “yes”, then there’s a chance loves you too, and you could all fix things together; But if he says “yes”, there’s also a chance that he doesn't love you, and just loves Jason and then...Your heart would be broken.

If he says no however, he might still love you, and then Jason’s heart would be broken. And so would be this little trio of yours.

From Roy’s answer...your world could either be turned to the best, or worst.

“...Yes”.

He finally says. And his head slumps down, and your heart drops. Does that mean ? ...He continues :

“I’m sorry (Y/N). I tried not to. But...Ever since I met him I had a crush, and then...we’re just so close. A friendship so strong, and it always blew my mind how much I cared and it was all because...it wasn’t just a strong friendship. It was also love. And I’m sorry (Y/N), I really tried not to love him...”

You freeze. Does that mean...Does that mean he doesn’t love you anymore ? Or never loved you ? It was all fake to forget Jason ? Then why was he so mad Jason kissed you ? ...Oh. Oh was it because since he was in love with him, he...your heart stopped.

You would be out of the picture. You had to step down now.

You could feel tears welling up in your eyes...But Jason’s fingertips caught them before they fell and said :

“We really are idiots, we keep getting stuck into those stupid misunderstanding that we could easily avoid if we...voiced our feelings more. Roy, do you love (Y/N) ? Truly love her ?”

Roy’s head comes back up, and with a vexed look in his eyes he says :

“Of course I love her !! I just said so a few seconds ago ! Why do you think I was so hurt when I saw you kiss her ? Felt so betrayed ? And how was I suppose to know you were going to tell us you both love us ?”

Relief. Again. Relief washes over you. And you start to laugh.

You can’t help it. All of this. Those two months of pain, and this tense conversation. All those quiproquos and such. All those times you didn’t understand the others’ meaning, or actions. How you almost all threw it away because of it...And here it was finally ending.

“Oh my god. I love you both so much...”

You hear yourself say. And they both turn and look at you, something new burning in their eyes. Jason says :

“You...you do ?”

“Oh yes. Yes. And if I’m being honest, have been for a while now...”

It’s Roy’s turns now, to have a small tender smile on his face as he brushes his own fingertips on your cheek, where a few seconds ago tears threatened to fall. And where now, there were tears indeed...But tears of happiness.

“You love us both ?”

You don’t even know which one of you asked that, but the answer is unanimous.

“Yes.”

And just like that, every pent up emotions fly into the air, and you laugh.

Oh you laugh so much...

And you tell each others. Those three words. “I love you”. You tell each other, all of you.

When you stop, you all look at each others, not sure of the next step now that you clumsily professed your love to each other...

Should you...talk more about it ? Try to figure out why you were all in love with two people ? Try to understand why you hid it for so long ? Just trying to be normal ? Should you just talk it through ?

But what was there to talk about. You loved each other. It was official.

Jason always knew it. He always knew he was in love with both you and Roy. You had discovered it right when you all fell apart. And Roy...Roy realized it only a few minutes earlier, when you asked him how he felt.

He knew since a very long time he was in love with you. But as you asked if he also loved Jason...He realized that, yes. Yes he did. And what else could you guys add ?

Nothing.

Or almost nothing.

With a mischievous smile, you turn to Jason and say :

“So...Jay. I think we have one last problem to fix.”

Jason’s eyebrows crease. What now ? More drama ? Please, please no more dramas...He didn’t think his heart could handle it.

But the look in your eyes as you said this...It was the same expression that you had just after him and Roy kissed. Raw heat. And a mind full of dirty ideas.

“I think our man here, doesn’t know how much we love him. How much he means to us. And I think we should refresh his...memory.”

Oh. Oh Jason knew where you were going with this, and he loved it. Your tone of voice was the same than when you were all doing the dirty and...It hits Roy too.

In the most sensitive place it seems, as you both saw something twitch in his pants. You turn to your ex-boyfriend now boyfriend again and say :

“Whaddaya think Roy ? Should we show you some appreciation ?”

Your voice is oh so sultry and it always drove him so wild...He looks at you intensely and says, trying to keep his voice clear though it was already hoarsed :

“Well, I think that would only be fair. After all, I’m the one that thought his girlfriend was cheating on him...That thought his best friends were betraying him so I feel like I deserve some...Appreciation.”

He smiles deviously, and looks between you and Jason. And your heart swells.

Was it really that easy ? Could you have avoided months of angstiness just by talking things through ? ...OH but you were all so stupid.

Because it was really that easy. Once you all realized that you were equally all too important. Once you realized that you couldn’t live without the THREE of you together.

It was really that easy. All that you needed was to...talk. To say : “I love you”. To admit you weren’t in love with just one person. To admit that little trio of yours was more than just friendship...And that you kinda knew it all along.

Of course. Jason joined in on your sex session so easily, of course there was more. You touched each others so tenderly, of course there was more. You got along too well and always craved each others presence, of course there was more...

And here. Finally. You realized it.

But Roy was the last one to realize it, and arguably, the one that suffered the most. Without speaking, you and Jason understood each others.

You would take care of him a bit more tonight. And next time one of you two would feel insecure, then it’d be your turn.

But tonight...Tonight would be all about Roy.

************

And this is how you ended up tearing off his shirt and licking his chest all over, while Jason’s tongue was in Roy’s mouth, kissing him passionately.

Instinctively, you placed yourselves on each side of your boyfriend. Of your lover. You were in front of him, Jason behind.

And when Jay moved away to take his own clothes off, you took his place kissing Roy with all the passion you had in your being. Your arms were around his neck, and his were holding you close by clinging your waist.

It’s only when you both felt Jason moving back in that you separated. Jason gave you a quick kiss, licking your lower lip, and went back to kissing Roy’s neck, sucking and biting there and there.

You pulled away to take your clothes off, stripping sensually under Roy’s intense gaze, before going back to him. He thought you were about to kiss his lips again, but instead you peppered his jaw, chin, all the way down to his collar bone, while Jason was kissing his shoulder blades.

You met again with Jason at the junction of his neck and shoulder, and kissed each others while massaging Roy all over. You then parted, and gave each other a wink, knowing exactly what to do to make sure that Roy would finally feel like he truly belonged.

To make sure he would never feel as if you and Jason focused more on each others than on him during sex.

You elicited so many moans out of Roy’s mouth, that you both feel more aroused than ever...

You’re not ashamed to say it, you are dripping wait at the sound he makes, and at the idea of what’s coming next. And seeing the bulge in Roy’s pant, and how rock hard Jason seems to be, there is indeed no shame to have.

Roy can’t handle it anymore.

“Guys, are you go...I...ah...I can’t...I...”

But he can’t formulate any thoughts, as you and Jason work him up to his limit. It doesn’t take that much, as you suck and bite at his skin, stroking him all over. His pants is still on, and it becomes unbearable for him, needing more friction.

It’s you, who release him slowly.

You kiss down from his lips all the way to his abdomen, and finally pull his pants and boxers down, and oh you missed the sight of his cock springing to life.

Roy moans loudly as he feels Jason slowly getting to his knees too, behind him.

One of the archer’s hand wind up in your hair, while the other want tangles in Jay’s mane, and he’s pretty sure he’s about to die.

You keep peppering kisses all around his inner thighs, without touching him where you want him too, and Jason does the fucking same, kissing his lower back, licking and biting but not going to the point !

He’s about to protest when finally, finally, so in synch that it’s so obvious you were meant to be together, you and Jason take action.

And it’s no better...Or rather, it’s better than anything. But it still drives Roy insane.

One of your hand loosely wrap around his cock, as your tongue leisurely run up and down his shaft in controlled movement. And Jason ? Fuck, Jason just spread his ass cheek and is giving him the best rim job he ever had.

You can feel, by the way his hands are tightening in both your hair, and by the way he kinda raises up on his tip toe, that he’s beyond his head with pleasure.

And so you both lick away. You both give it your all.

But you...You’re a bit sneakier. You take your time. You slowly work an orgasm out of him. Because you know Jason will have to do more, while you’ll keep sucking him...So you slowly swirls your tongue all around him. Sometimes moving to his ball, close to Jay, to grab at each other quickly, exchanging a quick french kiss while also driving Roy crazy by stopping, even if for a second.

You slowly suck on in, lick all over including parts all around his cock to enhance any sensation of his, while Jason preps him...

While Jason preps him for more. Because of course, he’ll do more than just a silly rim job, even if it is already, paired with the blow job, extremely pleasurable.

At one point, you can hear Roy groan in displeasure as Jason gets to his feet...but you know what he’s doing and so you suck on Roy’s head more intensely so he forgets Jay’s absence.

And you do a wonderful job, as both his hands are now in your hair and you feel his hips swaying in and out of your mouth of its own accord...You smiled around his dick, and patiently let him fuck your mouth as Jason comes back.

And he has something in his hand, that makes you moan knowing what will happen. Damn. So hot.

Oh you’re enjoying all this way too much, it almost makes you feel shameful...Almost, because you like too much giving pleasure to one of the people you love like that.

Jason, behind Roy, coats two of his fingers with the oil he went to get, and you feel Roy’s cock twitch in your mouth as Jason places himself right and, spreading his new boyfriend’s ass cheeks again, insert slowly one, then two fingers inside him.

Roy’s eye roll at the back of his head, and he almost falls forward, as Jason knows him too well and hit the right spot immediately. But this...this propels Roy towards you and you almost choke on his dick.

You pull away quickly, and the two men look at you, concern in their eyes. You cough a little, but then smile at them and chuckle.

“I guess that’s what I get for choosing such...Well endowed lovers. Just give me a second, which I think anyway, Coy Roy there needs”.

Roy scoffs, but...Yeah he kinda needs it. He’s pretty sure he could never handle your perfect lips and skills around his cock, while Jason was working him open from behind with his damn professional fingering...

Jason, his eyes fixed on you to make sure you’re ok, thrusts his fingers in and out of Roy. You exchange a look with him, and reassure him. Yeah. You’re fine.

Through half-lidded eyes, and through his intense pleasure, Roy looks at you too, and tries to convey to you his concern but...it’s ok. You get it. Jason is after all pretty skilled with his fingers.

You stand up, and leave a quick peck on Jay’s lips, before walking around Roy to go and slowly stroke your other boyfriend...Yes. Yes you said it was Roy’s night but you couldn’t help it.

You just imagined Jason, during those three years, being desperately in love with the both of you and never saying anything out of fear to ruin things. Suffering on his own...And you just have to give a little bit more to him too.

Besides, right now, there’s nothing you can do to Roy that won’t make him pass out in pleasure. Any more kisses, or blow job would be his end, as Jay works him up to his max.

So kissing one last time Roy on the lips, you walk around him and face Jason. He looks at you curiously, as you reach to stroke his cheek...but the way he leans in. Damn. You love that man.

Without stopping his thrusting motion on Roy, Jason kisses you, and let you stroke his dick slowly, reminiscing of that first night you all spend together, where he watched Roy fuck you as you jerked him off...

This propels his dick to twitch, and you look at him curiously. But he just smiles smugly as he reaches with his free hand to your pussy, and flick your clit teasingly.

You keep this little game of yours for a little while. As you want to show Jason that now, he’s in this too, for good. You stroke him lovingly, and he works you just as expertly as he works Roy. You kiss, passionately...Just for a little while.

Because this is Roy’s night.

With your own free hand, you reach in front of Roy to jerk him too, and the desperate moan he lets out is addictive.

You don’t realize it, but your own moans drive both your boyfriends crazy. And Roy blesses whoever gifted Jason with such a talent with his hands.

For a little while, you stroke both of their cocks, while Jason fingers you and Roy and...It’s mostly Roy’s night, but you also need release.

You move away from them, and they both groan, shooting you a disapproving look as you walk away...But you go towards the bed.

You sit on the edge, and slowly crawl in the middle, gesturing to them to come closer, with your most sensual and sexy moves.

And oh, both their dicks jerks up at the motion. And they know what you want, what you mean. You don’t even need to talk. You never need to talk. You always understand each other oh so perfectly.

Jason let’s Roy go, and they both walk towards you.

But tonights Roy’s night. And you had an idea that they understood in mind.

Roy kneeled in front of you, as you took hold once more of his cock, and started to play with it while Jason was getting ready...

This time, the Red Hood coated his own dick with oil. He settled himself behind Roy, and inserted a finger inside him once again, to be sure he was not going to hurt him...and then..Then Jason spreads Roy’s thighs.

And you see, through said spread thighs, as he gets ready, stroking himself a few times before settling at Roy’s entrance.

Roy takes a deep breath, bracing himself but...it’s Jason we’re talking about. The only man that you him that well. The only person he trusted entirely with handling his body. And as you were licking his cock head again...Jason slowly penetrated Roy.

Slowly. Not forcing his way. Stopping if he felt it resisted a bit, realigning and pushing further...Until he was fully sheathed in his boyfriend.

Roy growled out, as Jason made that sound you loved so much. That desperate little gasp of pleasure. You smiled to yourself as you took a little step back, sitting in front of them. You knew how things would unfold.

Both their eyes were closed, and it almost seemed like they had forgotten you, buried in each other so deeply...But they didn’t.

Jason’s eyes shot open, and he slowly bend Roy down, towards you.

Jay’s cock was easing itself slowly in and out of the man, making smooth thrusting motion, and Roy finally spoke up :

“I...I hated...I hated both of you so much...”

He sighs, as Jason fucks him slowly, and you stroke him tenderly, brushing your thumb over the head of his cock, where some pre-cum gathered.

“I...I can’t believe I hated you so much...”

Jason continues to thrust, with a little more force now, taking Roy’s moans as his queue to go faster and harder. But everything comes to a sudden stop...

Roy’s hand stops Jason’s hips to slam into him again, while his other free hand pulls you off his dick and shows to you to lay down on the bed.

Roy turns to a concerned Jason, who was afraid he just had hurt him, and says :

“It just doesn’t seem fair, that I’m only forgiving you right now...”

And Jay understands. He nods, and let himself fall forward with Roy.

You look at him curiously until...Oh. Yes. Of course.

Roy slides himself inside you easily, as your walls are wetter than they’ve ever been. He buries himself to the hilt, holding himself up with his elbows on each side of your face, and it’s your turn to roll your eyes to the back of your head, because damn, he knew you too well, and hit that particular spot with his first motion.

That particular spot that ached to be hit since the beginning of all this.

And just like that, Jay started to move again, in perfect synch with Roy’s movement inside you. Whenever the archer was thrusting deep within you, Jay was pulling out of him, and vice versa.

Thrust.

“Ah. You’re so fucking beautiful. So fucking beautiful...and I dreamt of this for so long...”

You’re not really sure of who says this, and to whom, but does it really matter ? In the end, no. Because it could have been any of you that said that, to any of you, and it would mean the same.

You all thought you were gorgeous. Beautiful. Sexy. Oh so fucking hot. So who cared, who said what to who ? It was meant for all three of you.

In, out.

"I wanted to fuck you, I wanted to taste you, I wanted to come all over you-"

And who the cares to whom that was destined ? Because you all wanted to fuck each others, to taste each others and man if the occasion arised, to come all over each other...The mere thought made you all moan, tighten around each other, hands tangling in hair, kisses lost on collar bones and tongue licking backs and shoulder blades.

Mouth finding each other hungrily, tongue dancing around each others, and who cared who did it with who ? Because in that moment, you were all so connected. You were all just one being.

Thrust. Gasp from one of you...Or maybe all of you ?

Thrust going faster. Inside Roy’s ass. Inside your pussy. In total synch.

"Your beautiful cock in my mouth. Your come. You taste so good."

Did you say that ? Or was it Roy ? Maybe Jason ? You didn’t even differentiate each others’ voice now, because all of you said what was on everyone’s mind. You were oh so perfectly connected.

Thrust.

“Oh God-”

Someone is on the verge of coming, and you’re not quite sure who...Maybe you ? After all, feeling Jay moving in and out of you so perfectly, lying above you, is driving you crazy...And now...Now...

Is that Jason’s fingers, slowly flicking your clit ? Yes. Yes it is.

Roy’s hands are on either sides of your head, to keep himself and Jay off of you (they would be too heavy), so it couldn't be you...You shoot a look up to Jason and...One of his hand is holding Roy’s hips firmly, leaving marks of his fingers on his skin, but the other one...the other one went down to your clit.

And maybe it was you, who was on the verge of coming and who uttered this “Oh God”, but you didn’t even realize it...

In, out.

Thrust.

Deep thrust.

Hard and fast now.

“Roy...”

Thrust.

“Jason...”

Earth shattering thrust.

“(Y/N)...”

Crippling pleasure.

“Oh Roy...I’m gonna...I’m gonna...”

“Jay, don’t stop, don’t...”

“(Y/N), you’re so warm and tight and...”

“Ah ! Mmm...”

You don’t know who says what. And it doesn’t matter.

Because now...Now...

Now Roy cries out desperately, as you feel him thrust three more times inside you before unleashing his own warmth deep inside, coating your walls with his seed.

And now you tighten around him as he helps you ride out your own orgasm that you didn’t even realize hit you a few seconds before, and through him over the edge. And you cling to Roy’s shoulder, digging your nails inside them.

And he...oh he can’t. It’s two strong, to have a double orgasm like that...Because as he was making love to you (there was no fucking between all of y’all anymore), and came inside you, Jason was hitting all the right spot and made him orgasm again, his ass tensing around Jay’s cock and...

It was the final cries, the final yell of pleasure, groans, growls...The end of this heated love making session.

Jason. Jason was last. And he didn’t hold back.

He thrusted a few more times in Roy’s tight ass, feeling how the man’s walls were closing around his veiny cock, and he came.

Oh he came so much.

Two months of pent up feelings.

And then he was falling on his side, in the bed, and Roy was too, ending up sandwiched between you and Jason.

And sure it was kind of a mess, and you needed to clean up but...Right now, right now you were too spend to move.

Roy couldn’t feel his legs anymore, and all his muscles were painfully throbbing after such two intense orgasms. You were cuddled up against Roy’s chest, a hand lost on Jason’s waist, unable to move ether. And Jason...Jason could have moved, but he didn’t want to. Because moving would mean letting go of both of you, and he just couldn’t do that just now.

Not just as he found you back. Not just as he discovered that he was loved as much as he loved. Not...Not just now.

Finally. Things were how they always were supposed to be.

With Jason falling asleep with you and Roy.

With the three of you falling asleep in each others’ arms (Roy having the best place that night, the middle).

You and Roy had dated for three years, but it’s only now that this little missing thing you always felt fell into place.

It was Jason all along.

Of course.

Roy was almost mad that you all wasted three years like that...

But now it was all over. The missing piece was found and in the puzzle.

You were together. And you all loved each other just the same...

************

Sometimes though, one of you would feel a bit less loved for some reasons (often a result of them overthinking). And it couldn’t be more wrong because the feelings you all had for each others was equal...But eh.

You couldn’t control your insecurities.

So sometimes, one of you would need a remainder that he or she was loved all the same.

If it was you, oh the treat you were in for, as they’d both take very good care of you (and of your holes). Working you to multiple orgasm, to exhaustion, so you would stop having such silly thought of “maybe they love each other more than they love me”.

Because you all loved each other the same.

If it was Roy, you’d have a reenactment of the night you all admitted your feelings to each other. It was always great, and extremely tiring.

And if it was Jason ? Well. Jason was particular. When he felt less loved, you had to leave everything to him. Let him in charge of every movements. Which often ended in both you and Roy sprawled on the bed while he was eating you out and jerking him off, or blowing him off and fingering you...

But you’d always make sure that every single one of you knew his or her place in the trio. Knew that there was none of that “I love you more” bullshit between you. You were all desperately in love with each others, equally, and nothing nor anyone could ever change that.

You were planning on having a long and fulfilling life altogether...And Alfred, aka best butler ever, was already preparing everything for the future “trio wedding”, because he was sure it was only a matter of time before you guys asked each others to get married, and man if the old butler wasn’t all for his master to be happy. And if you and Roy made him happy ? He’d prepare this impossible marriage with three party. Every day of the week.

The end (?).

_______________________________

Ok. Sorry if this is terrible, especially the sex scene (at first, I wanted to write multiple little scenes, but ended up writing a big one so...yeah. Maybe I’ll write more if you like this pairing...or like...trioing (how do we call them ?!)...If you like Jason x Reader x Roy. I’m not good at writing smut and I’m cringing so hard every time I do, but I still somewhat enjoy writing it so...Why not, if you liked it. Sorry...OK. The end. As usual though, feedbacks = life.

PS : Yes, as usual I did NOT re-read myself so sorry for typos. I just can’t proof read something of mine, I cringe too much.

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borusawa · 6 years ago

Text

1 new message

A/N: So, recently I decided to do a fic with chapters and this is all new to me but I’m excited. The name is “1 new message” and I’ll post on ff.net and wattpad as well (and you’ll find the link in my masterlist soon).

Beta reader: @abbypdg (thank u, you’re an angel)

Warnings: there’s some cursing in this chapter but the book as a whole is mature content.

Word count: 3,692

Chapter 1 >

PROLOGUE

The library was full of pretending. Students pretending they cared for the finals next week, the librarian pretending as if his job wasn't terrible and I, pretending that the way Boruto was looking and smiling at me from time to time wasn't affecting me at all and it was actually bothering.

"Why are you smiling that way?" I said with an annoying tone without removing my sight from the notebook in the table right in front of me.

"Nothing." He smiled again turning himself to be facing me. "You look cute when you're fully concentrated like that."

I couldn't avoid blushing but I tried my best to not let him see the pink shade spread all over my face. I should be accustomed to his usual compliments by now but how could I do it when he always did that with his perfect smile and blue eyes staring back at me? I don't blame myself for these feelings, they were totally his fault.

"You are way cutter trying to hide your blush from me, Uchiha." He sat straight again and his comment made me blush even more. So he knew what I was doing? Like reading my mind he said: "I know you too well not to notice what you're trying to do."

I turned to him completely surprised only to see he was already focused on his own notebook. Oh, yeah. That reminded me, I should be studying, not talking. That thought brought me back to my tracks. It was peaceful for a while despite all the people filling the room we were, their whispers becoming louder when grouped with others whispers. All I should think of was this big test I was going to have on Friday, also known as tomorrow. I was pissed at my teacher for giving a test on a Friday but the other option was Monday so basically there are evils that come for the good. Finishing this test in peace meant study slash gossip party with my girls all weekend and I was up to that. There were a lot of things I needed to talk to them about, some of them even related to the man right beside me. Boruto. Sometimes the reason of my happiness, sometimes the reason of my sadness but always the reason of my confusion. What did he feel for me? Was I just a friend? That would make no sense. Did he even notice the way I had been acting around him lately? I was trying hard to act normally and I hoped it was working because I did not want for him to find out, at least not before I felt ready, that is. Why was I thinking about him anyway? The test tomorrow, that's what I should be thinking about. As soon as I tried to focus again one of the kids in the library started to scream and laugh really loud with his friend, getting pissed looks from everyone around. The librarian didn't care enough to stop them because, as I said before, his job sucks and he knows it. Someone grabbed my wrist and I immediately looked for the source of the touch.

"We should leave, here's so crowded that we won't get any study properly with all the noise."

As soon as I nodded, Boruto started to pack his stuff and so did I. "Where will we go then?" I asked without stop gathering my things.

"If it's okay to you we can go to my apartment... Shikadai won't be home till at least 9PM." He sounded cute and shy and I smiled at that. "I-I mean, only if you're okay with it." Again, shyness rising from his voice.

"It's okay."

He smiled back at me and stood up. "Okay, so we should be going."

I followed him to his car and noticed the parking lot was quieter than the library itself. God, I was happy to leave. Even happier because I was going to spend some time alone with my best friend. No dirty thoughts. At least I was avoiding the dirty thoughts at all costs. When we were getting close to his car, he hurried up to open the door for me. What the fuck is this guy doing to me? Ashamed, I accepted his gesture and entered the car. I watched his smile while he got on the driver sit, putting the seat belt on.

"You okay? Why are you staring me with that look in your eyes?"

"What? You wish. I'm not staring you." I switched my sight to the window and heard his laughter behind me. He started the car and we were on our way.

It wasn't a big distance between the library and his house so we only took a few minutes to get into his building. We stayed silent all the way, more like a comfortable silence or, better yet, a what-is-going-to-happen-now silence. Boruto and I were alone together all the time but never in our houses. There was always someone with us at that times, so it was technically the first time we were really going to be alone, like alone alone, not in a public place or with friends alone. And that was frightening for me, with my feelings and all. I knew I shouldn't be worrying about it because he was my best friend in the world but at the same time how could I not. He parked the car and we waited for the elevator, in silence still. Okay, now that was bothering me, I thought I should say something.

"So, where is Shikadai?"

"Oh" He said between giggles. "It looks like somehow his mother managed to discover he is smoking now and have been calling him ever since. He told her, of course by message, that he could not answer her calls because he was going to a trip." The elevator opened and we entered. He pressed his floor level before starting to talk again. "He is afraid as fuck of her getting here and makes him live a scenario where he will have to talk to her face to face, so he is out. I don't know exactly to where, though. Must be napping somewhere."

I laughed a lot at the story. "What did he thought? That she was never going to find out?"

Boruto smirked. "Yeah, pretty much."

Soon my laughs stopped and we fell in silence once again. Why is it being so weird?

The elevator door opened and we were finally inside his house. "Do you wanna a drink or something?" He threw the keys in a pot over a cabin right beside the door and placed his backpack on the floor, directing his pace to the kitchen while I sat shyly in the couch.

"No, nothing. Thanks."

"Come on, we're studying since 10AM and it's already 2PM, so you must be starving. We might as well eat before start studying again. Make yourself comfortable while I prepare something for us." I heard his shout through the wall separating us.

"You are forgetting that you don't know how to cook." I said I little louder than I used to talk so he could hear me on the other room.

He returned to the living room only to smirk at me with his arms crossed. "Then I guess I'll need your help."

Once I got on the kitchen I knew I could not stay there any longer without cleaning. "We are going to clean this before making food."

"But I'm too hungry to that." He made a puppy face. I crossed my arms. "I’m glad you agreed."

He knew there was no escape besides accepting his fate and we just cleaned the whole kitchen. At least the most we could. I was happy cleaning because, first, I could not let my friends live like pigs and second, there's no sexual tension when people are cleaning rests of food. Once we finished, everything was so clean that we only knew none of us had the courage to do anything to change its current state.

"Pizza it is?" he asked, although no questions were needed. "Totally."

Boruto took his phone to call the pizza’s place and that remind me of checking mine. Took me a while to find my phone between the papers and books on my bag, and when I looked at the screen I just knew something was wrong.

5 missed calls from Chocho

11 new messages

"Oh fuck."

Boruto stopped his phone talking and looked me. "What happened?" and I just showed him the notification. He smirked at the sight. "Something must have happened with one of the Kardashians." And with that, he restarted his complain to the phone. No, I want pepperoni. What do you mean you guys don't sell those?

Unlocking my phone, I started to read the messages.

11:34AM Chocho

GIIIRRL

11:34AM Chocho

I have something URGENT to tell you :O

11:45AM Chocho

Sarada, answer this phone.

12:17PM Chocho

WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?

I called you a thousand times

already

12:17AM Chocho

I should change friend and roommate,

u r not helping me rn

12:18AM Chocho

I swear to god if u are with Boruto or Mitsuki

again I'll have to kick you from our apartment.

12:18AM Chocho

No, I won't, but I'll be pissed.

1:34PM Chocho

Okay, I'm getting worried. No normal person

stay this long without checking the phone for no

reason. Not even you.

3:26PM Chocho

Nothing? I'm calling the police.

3:36PM Chocho

So, I'm with Mitsuki and he doesn't have any

idea of where Boruto are either. Hope u r fuckin' :)

Now Chocho

(Photo)

I clicked on the picture and it was a cute photograph of my second favorite couple in the world, the first being my parents, obviously. Chocho was holding a hamburger in her hands and Mitsuki had the prettiest grin on his face with one hand holding the phone and the other arm around Chocho's shoulders. I smiled at them, even though they couldn't see it. I was so happy that they were finally together after a hell of a rollercoaster. I wonder when it will be my turn. I quickly typed her a message saying that I was alive, well, and with Boruto and that the picture she sent me was cute.

Boruto finished the call and sat right beside me. "They said we'll need to wait twenty minutes tops." I turned my phone so he could see the image I was smiling at. "They are great together, aren't they? I'm happy for them."

"Me too." was all I could say. "We should do something till the pizza get here, right?" I didn't want to be in silence with him again.

"What about watching Black Mirror? What was the last episode we watched?"

"The one with the girl with a camera in the eye and the crazy mother."

"Oh yes, that one." And suddenly the fact that he only had a television on his room fell upon us. "I figure it can be weird go to my room since we are totally alone. We don't need to-"

"No, it's okay by me." Of course it was 'okay' by me. I guess he shouldn't trust me.

We awkwardly walked to his room. I sat on the bed hugging his pillow with my arms and legs. He laughed at me and also sat at the bed. Again, not the first time we did it, but we never did it when no one else was home. Boruto easily found his remote and turned on the TV. "So, what are you up to these days?"

"Not much." I answered, watching him pick the show and getting closer to me. "What are you doing?"

"I want to lie down." He removed the pillow off my arms and placed his head on my lap. I knew it wasn't a meaningful act so I just started to run my fingers through his blond and soft hair. The show started, we stayed that way until the pizza guy arrived and Boruto answered the door. I started to follow him but the window caught my attention. It was getting dark outside, and we didn't study like we said we would.

My test was the next morning, so no postponing the review anymore.

"It's too late, Boruto. I should go home." He frowned his brows to me, holding the pizza box in his hand while closing the door with his feet. "And we didn't study at all. Our test is tomorrow, we're gonna regret this."

"No, you don't need to leave. I promise you we're going to study after the pizza, I swear. And then I can take you home." I smiled at the last sentence. I loved when people gave me a ride.

"Okay. But know that I'm staying for pizza and the ride." I deadpanned.

"You're not staying for me, I got it." He walked to his room.

"Well, you're the one who paid for the pizza and will give me a ride so... It's kinda for you if you think about it."

I press play on the show and we start eating. "This pizza is good. Where is it from?"

"There's a pizza place two blocks away that opened recently. I don't know if you noticed yet." He kept talking but I lost my composure and just stared at him unblinking, admiring his eyes and the way he smiled through his words. He called my name and then I woke up from my daydreaming to see his worried slash confused face.

"Sarada, are you okay? You spaced out for a moment."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. You were saying?"

"Nothing important."

We finished the pizza without any further problems. Once we were done I took the remote and turned off the TV. "Now, let’s study." Boruto frowned but moved from his bed to his table. I sat on the floor with the books over his bed.

I was mostly reading my notes from the rest of the semester and thinking about how I truly couldn't wait for the summer vacation to start. All of our friends were planning to drive to the beach and stay some days at uncle Naruto's beach house. He said it was okay since he haven't used it for a while, but warned us about the possibility of it being a little dirty. We were aware that probably it wasn't 'a little' but everyone was too excited to worry.

Boruto motions his notebook in front of me. "Sarada, I'm struggling a little here. Can you help me?"

"Sure, come here." I waited for him to place himself on my side. I put my head above his shoulder so I could see the problem but he never started talking. I lifted my sight to ask him what was going on, only to see that he was facing me. I looked right into his eyes while he looked into mine. We were only centimeters apart, I could feel his warm breath on my face. Our sudden proximity got me motionless and I couldn't stop wondering if he was also holding the urge to lean into a kiss.

"Boruto, I'm home" Guess we will never know. Shikadai's voice filled the house and Boruto and I broke apart, both blushing hard. Shikadai soon appeared at the room’s door. "Sorry, I didn't know you were here, Sarada."

"It's okay." I moved my sight to Boruto. "I think we should stop studying anyway. Will you give me that ride?" I stood up fixing my clothes, and both Boruto and Shikadai stared at me; confusion drawn in his faces. "What?"

"Is it because I got home?" Shikadai asked unsure.

Flustered, I answered him shooking my head. "Noooo, of course not. It's just late and we gotta sleep well for our test tomorrow, right Boruto?"

"Yeah, I guess. We can go, then." He blushed and things got weirder. I left the room first and Boruto trade some word with Shikadai before catching my pace.

The car ride to my home was even more awkward than it was earlier that same day. After all, what was that? Everything was fine before that moment. And why was he blushing? I had a lot of questions floating in my head and I only noticed I was home when he stopped the car.

"So..." He started.

"So?" we looked blankly at each other. He wanted to say something but started measuring if that was the right moment to say whatever that was in his mind. I decided for him. "Thanks for the day, see you tomorrow." I left the car with no more words.

Sincerely I could not take anymore more minute thinking about him when he was right beside me. I don't know, it felt weird, like if I was hiding something from him. Indeed, I was hiding but still, I didn't enjoy that feeling. I totally chickened out and I knew it, and I was sure I would hide that part when I told my day to Chocho. When did I become a liar? I waved him from outside the car and waited his car to disappear from my sight before entering my building. I knew I was overthinking a lot but... What was that?

The lights were all turned on in my apartment and the first thing I saw was a blue haired guy underneath a beautiful girl, both faces glued on one another. “...hi?” They stopped the making out session to look at me. Mitsuki waved me with his weird smile plastered on his face. Chocho only took a glimpse at my presence before turning to her boyfriend again. “You guys know you could like, be doing this in her room, right?”

“Yes, we know, thanks.” Chocho said between kisses. Then she leaned to kiss his neck, leaving Mitsuki free to talk to me.

“How are you, Sarada? I heard you were with Boruto.”

I started to move to my room. I sure loved them and the fact that they were together, but did I deserve to watch their make out session? No. Touching my room’s handle, I decided to answer Mitsuki. “Yes, whatever.”

That must’ve clicked a bottom on Chocho gossip side, so she stopped what she was doing to approach me. “Girl what happened?”

That’s what I want to know. “Nothing.”

“Why are you so moody? Something must have happened.” She stared Mitsuki for a brief moment, sadness in her eyes. “I’m sorry, baby, we continue some other day, okay?” She walked him to the door.

“Please not in the living room.” I said. Chocho sent me and annoyed look and Mitsuki only smiled. They hugged and kissed while I waited Chocho to finish saying goodbye to her boyfriend.

As soon as she closed the door behind, her gaze fixed on me. “Nothing must be good because I just ditched my boyfriend to hear you.”

“To be fair, I didn’t ask you.”

“...Out loud, I know what’s in your head no words needed.” Oh, I knew that. “Come on, sit here with me.” She motions for me to sit by her couch. I leave my bag on the floor and pace till the place she pointed. I sighed.

I explained the whole day to her, of course avoiding the ride part, and she listened carefully, not even making any question. “So, that was it. Maybe I’m seeing too much into things and rushing and it was actually not meant to be anything but I’m confused.”

“Maybe you are. You will need to ask him.”

“No way I’m asking him anything.” I shook my head. “I won’t. That’s a fucking no.”

“No cursing allowed in this house, girl. You don’t need to be direct, just ask him about his feelings. You guys are friends and your ask won’t be weird.”

“I guess so...” I looked around the house and noticed a purple figure missing. “Off topic, where is Sumire? Shouldn’t she, like, be here to avoid that kind of lascivious behavior I spotted in our living room?” Our third roommate was generally the quiet and prude kind, the one that kept me and Chocho under watch, saving us from ourselves most of the time.

“First, who the hell says ‘lascivious’? Are you eighty? Second, she’ll be staying at her boyfriend’s tonight.”

My mouth dropped open in total disbelief. “She is what now? And what?”

“You didn’t know about that? Do you still live in this house with us?” Chocho crossed her arms and raised her brows completely pissed.

Oh no, she’s in the mood. I tried to change the subject as fast as I could. The truth is I had been spending too much time with Boruto lately. “So, have you met him already? Does he treat her well?”

“No and I don’t know. She is hiding him from us because she is afraid we will discover something sick about his past. Where did she get that from?” I was pretty sure the “us” was added by Chocho herself.

I giggled. “I don’t know, maybe from her last three boyfriends.”

“Hey, she should be thankful for what we found out, they were trash. Or did she want to marry someone who had a YOLO tattoo?”

“I still don’t know how you found out about that.”

“Girl, I have my methods. Don’t question them, just follow the flow.”

A quick glance at my phone made me notice how late it actually was. “Anyway, time sure flew by today. I’ll have a test early tomorrow so I’ll better be going.”

“Okay, don’t forget that I’m here anything.” I smiled and Chocho smiled back. I knew she would.

...

I usually was a morning person. Seeing the sun rise was something that I loved but I couldn’t give me that lux that day. I woke up 7AM with my alarm buzzing like crazy. But when I took my phone, there was a notification. Who could it be that early in the morning? I got up putting my glasses and unlocking my phone. It was Boruto.

3:23AM Idiot

We gotta talk. Wait for me if you finish

the test first, ‘kay?

#borusara #borutoxsarada #borusarafics #boruto #sarada uchiha #naruto next generation #mitsucho #shikadai #borusara au

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seenashwrite · 7 years ago

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(1/2)I've completely lost my ability to focus right now, except for hearing Dean saying, "You're awesome, sweetheart," on a loop. I've reread your many treatises on the subject, finally finding the one where someone asked you, "If not sweetheart, then what?" You seemed to believe that he would use "baby" or "sweetiepie" because of his love of his car and pie. I would object to both of these, because I believe that, for him, both Baby and Pie are proper names. (Brother and Angel similarly so, but

Cursing my name? For reals!?

Nah, I kid. I know it’s not hate. And I do apologize, RE: that first part - I obviously was not clear, that’s on me. ‘Cause those ain’t my recommendations. Noooo.

I wanted to convey that it was interesting to me how, putting aside that he only uses “sweetheart” sincerely for Baby & Colt, even if he was using it as an endearment for, um, living things of a twue lurve nature, well….

Dude don’t use it all that often. Not when we compare it to things he no doubt, balls-to-the-wall loves, such as the Impala and pie [and alcohol, but “my lil’ whiskey sour” don’t quite do it for tinglin’ the nethers]. Thus, it got a raised eyebrow from me, how people don’t seem to have the knee-jerk of “sweetiepie” or “babydoll”, derivatives of things he does talk about/refer to adoringly on the reg. Tell me if that’s not making sense, I’ll work on phrasing it better.

Now, having said that - imagining either of those coming out of Dean’s mouth makes me wanna throw up, go eat, throw that up, then mainline Pepto so I can do it all over again til the thought is purged from my person.

All right. Let’s build a profile on Dean’s behavior & verbiage with legitimate love interests, based on what we know from canon, then see if we can’t drill down on a plausible nickname or two.

On an aside, I titled the document containing the draft of what’s below “Endeanments” and I hate myself.

Here’s how this breaks down in my head, so that’s how it’s laid out below. Should the Mrs. or anyone reading this wanna skip ahead, you do you. Scroll til you see the heading.

I. Thing Of The First: What Do We Want & What Do We KnowII. Which Romantic Interests Do We Focus On?III. What Are We Looking For & When We Find It, What Do We Do?IV. What Else Do We Have At Our Disposal To Flesh Out Our Profile Of “Dean In Love"’s Verbiage?V. Thing Of The Second: Nash On Nicknames/Endearments For Unnamed Characters - A.K.A.: Where I’m coming from on this, just so’s y’all can do the whole “Consider the source” thingVI. What Has Worked In The Nashhole Writing RoomVII. Thoughts On The Examples Given In The Ask VIII. Nash’s Three Key Pieces Of Advice For Pulling This Off

And Before We Get Cranking, RE: That Other Post

So here’s the meat & potatoes of what I said when somebody asked my thoughts on what Dean would use as a genuine term of endearment:

I’d bet money that for the actual contenders [both the ones I haven’t yet researched & the nonexistents/potential true loves/soulmates/blahblahblahs], they’d most assuredly be friends first, they will not be a hunter [not a hunter proper, at least, though knowledge of is not a deal-breaker], and any endearment is gonna be something that’s a riff on their name [a la “Sammy” or “Cas”] or related to a specific situation….. she knocks over the sugar bowl, so she’s “Sugar” until enough glares shut that shit down…. things like that.

I. Thing Of The First: What Do We Want & What Do We Know

This whole shebang is based upon the premise that an author gives a shit about accurate characterization of Dean within the context of a legit romantic relationship.

We gotta have a profile in mind regarding the broad strokes of what this chick would be like if our writing of his behavior/the things he says - such as, ta-da! an endearment - is gonna ring true.

All we can know is what’s in canon, and bless the wiki and all their transcripts because no one has to re-watch all the seasons to answer this. #hallelujah

II. Which Romantic Interests Do We Focus On?

The bed-‘em-and-book-it chicks are ruled out, see above, RE: legit love premise.

In the draft of the answer to the other Q that’s referenced in the Q linked above, I have it fleshed out more than I do here - although it’s not completely episode/quote-by-quote sourced - so if y'all wanna know the reasoning behind why I deem these four and only these four ladies of the “legit, Dean was really into them/this had the potential for true love” category, I can share it, but I can’t promise when.

I have no idea if he had an endearment for any or all of these ladies, is my point, y'all feel free to do the deep dive in that respect,

----> ETA later: We did the deep dive. He called Lisa “Honey” when she was dying; unrelated but kind’ve, when he was pretending to be Bela’s husband and she fake-choked on shellfish (also “dying”), he called her “Honey”, too. There ya go.

I stand by these chosen few and the order in which I’ve placed them, the reasons why have to do with character autopsies I do/have done for my big story, ergo would have to be another post or fourteen. Moving on.

Here’s my ranking for “Legit, Dean Totes Felt Something” characters:

4. Jo3. Cassie2. Lisa1. Carmen

All of these ladies, no matter if nothing ever got off the ground [Jo] to the what-might-have-been [Cassie] to the long-term relationship [Lisa] to the dream ideal [Carmen] have some stark, can’t-miss-‘em, key characteristics in common [intelligent, mature, value family, etc.] but I won’t go into that here.

They’re as solid a guide as we’ve got right now, and not just for doing this nickname postulation exercise - I’d also recommend peeps who wanna reeeeeally drill down on an O/C love for Dean to utilize these characters as a jumping off point. R/Is are, of course, going to be [::coughs:: should be] more nebulous in their attributes.

Take home message is that he had a great deal of respect for all of them, so anything that would have to depend on tone because it walks a fine line, you may wanna axe it from the list as an everyday sub for their name.

III. What Are We Looking For & When We Find It, What Do We Do?

You are looking for any nicknames/endearments he assigned to them.

If he did use an endearment with them, do the following:

(1) Which of those 4 is your Dean love interest most like?

(2) Picture Dean calling your character whatever endearment he called them

(3) How’d that work out for you?

And if not, to speculate upon what he would say….. guess what?

(1) Which of those 4 is your Dean love interest most like?

(2) Picture Dean calling them whatever endearment you’ve chosen

(3) How’d that work out for you?

That is your litmus test. Wash, rinse repeat.

IV. What Else Do We Have At Our Disposal To Flesh Out Our Profile Of “Dean In Love"’s Verbiage?

Plenty.

We’ve got the ability to make the profile more robust because of the cooooooooopious amount of evidence on the flip side, what he zeroes in on with the bed-’em-and-book-it type of gal, what his verbiage is like with them, the peeps he doesn’t intend on keeping around for long.

Bonus: that recent ep of what he was like under a love spell. Take what we saw, scale down the intensity, fiddle with it where appropriate - meaning, ‘86 anything that was alike in all the men they charmed, as that isn’t evidence of “Dean In Love” coming to the surface, it’s evidence of the spell’s structure so as to elicit specific behaviors in victims.

Second thing you can look at in terms of nicknaming habits are people for whom he has no romantic inclinations. The easiest cases in point being Sam and Castiel, a.k.a. Sammy and Cas. Off the top of my head, for whatever reason, I recall him calling Gadreel “Zeke” prior to the stolen identity reveal.

So Dean’s a “-y” adder and a name-shortener, consistently with Sam and Castiel, however many times with Ezekiel/Gadreel, and there’s likely more examples, godspeed on that research journey, I ain’t your girl.

I am also 100% - and I know y’all are, too - that he’s a biiiiiiig proponent of situational nicknaming, and while it’s usually snark [think “Batman” for himself, “Harry Potter” for Mick, etc.] it still goes to pattern. I’ve got so many of these in the CASPN decks, it’s unreal, and maaany, possibly most, of them - as noted just now - are TV/movie/music/book-related. [I know this because I’m trying to pull them out as I go to stick them in their own “Deanisms” deck, because if the decks ever go “public” for sale, they can’t have copyrighted content in them]

Again: here we’re looking at a broad stroke in his verbiage, to get a feel of his go-tos, his habits in what he calls others.

V. Thing Of The Second: Nash On Nicknames/Endearments For Unnamed Characters - A.K.A.: Where I’m coming from on this, just so’s y’all can do the whole “Consider the source” thing

I don’t lean into the whole nickname thing. It’s not a purposeful effort, as in, I’m policing myself or when I edit I’m taking them out. It’s just not a reflexive brain-to-keyboard thing for me. I don’t often have characters calling each other by name/nickname/endearment, particularly when it’s just 2 people in a convo, unless it’s a heated convo, a la “DAMMIT NASH!” and “EAT ME, SHITBIRD!”

Longer the fic, trickier this gets. Somebody’s gonna have to address our nameless-faceless protag at some point, and as has been established copiously during my tenure in this fandom, I hope Y/N and her pouty, lip-nibbling, everything-she-does-including-fart-is-done-softly self would die in a fire, ceiling optional, so believe me: I *do* co-sign substitute monikers.

It’s too far to scroll up, here’s what I said about his nicknaming pattern —>

and any endearment is gonna be something that’s a riff on their name [a la “Sammy” or “Cas”] or related to a specific situation….. she knocks over the sugar bowl, so she’s “Sugar” until enough glares shut that shit down…. things like that.

We talked above about him riffing on the person’s name. The situational thing I mentioned - I’ll tell y’all what I did for this, RE: the sticky wicket of when it’s a mini-series/series. [Personally? I think most one-shots can dodge this issue altogether, though certainly YMMV]

VI. What Has Worked In The Nashhole Writing Room

Now, I haaaaated writing the smut thing of mine when I lost a bet, so I plotted it to hell to keep my sanity, and it expanded to 5 g.d. parts. The smut part of it is *riddled* with the tripest tropes that ever troped [part of said bet’s terms], so I’m talking about the story part of it here.

Dean and the protag had a touch-and-go, volatile sitch going on for the bulk of it, ergo chances high due to intense emotions that somebody at some point was gonna have to address each other in at least a tense manner, if not one of anger.

And she was tough as nails, a sniper called in to assist them on a hunt, and she would’ve ended him if he dared call her anything even in the realm of too cutesy-shmoopsy on the reg. It would be in conflict with what I’d built her up to be, bottom line, and likely suck the readers out of the story.

Here’s the dodge I came up with, keeping in mind the situation is she’s a sniper:

“So, we have a decision to make,” Dean said through a partially chewed bite of his burger.

Was he actively trying to be gross? He thankfully swallowed before continuing.

“I’m not in the mood to drive all the way back to Jody’s, then have to share a bed with Sam in her guest room,” Dean began.

Okay. He was talking to me.

“I think the best thing to do is head to the bunker—”

I looked to him, aghast.

“—and we’ve got plenty of room, we can pick up a toothbrush for you when we stop to fill up—”

Did he not notice the big black bulky thing I’d thrown in the back floorboard when they picked me up? I was never not prepared. There was already a toothbrush in my backpack. And a change of clothes.

And a Glock.

“—then we’ll all be fresh daisies, get you home tomorrow. Whaddya say, Snipes?”

Oh god. He’d nicknamed me. Had my letting him win a staring contest actually infused him with enough bravado to try and make friends? Convince me to stay in what Jody had described as essentially a really large basement?

They end up in love - but the sub for her name isn’t lovey-dovey, and it doesn’t have to be, the dynamic between them is vastly more important [more on that later].

In another one in the ol’ draft folder - and it’s not a romantic dynamic, but the nickname dodge happens because she’s unnamed - here’s how that’s gonna work. In an earlier scene, it’s mentioned that Dean was giving her a hard time via the Patsy Cline song “I Fall To Pieces” [spoiler alert: it’s the story based upon THIS thing, you’re smart cookies, you’ll get the reasoning behind it]

And you’d remember. It’s not something you’d forget. I know this because no one else has. Dean still calls me “Cline” - let me rephrase - he bellows it, with glee and snort-laughs, though I suppose there’s worse things to be called. He’s called me those, too, over the years, he doesn’t disappoint. And Sam still narrows his eyes at left my knee, watches my gait for any unevenness or wobbles, and it doesn’t matter what I say, he’ll believe he messed up the articulation til the end of days.

Tangentially-related, in “Build Me Up, Buttercup” - the nutty AU-ish thing that actually started because I was riffing on the sweetheart situation and it mutated - there’s a chunk of conversation between The Woman In Black/The Masked Vampirate/The Apprentice [—-> hint, hint, hint: we *can* refer to folks without using a name/nickname] and Dean on this very topic, of what we call others in lieu of their given names. Mini-spoiler: Even though she’s written 3rd person O/C, and even though she does end up as someone’s love interest, you’re never gonna know her name.

Not spoilers, because these stories are already “out there”, you also never learned/will never learn the names of the chicks in Hello, I’m Gone; The Lore You Know; It; The Once Demon Barber From Robintree; A Delicate Desiccation; The Bell-Watcher’s Daughter; A Fluff By Any Other Name; and who friggin’ knows what-all in the stack of quickies I’ve accumulated.

VII. Thoughts On The Examples Given In The Ask

Back to what you said….. and shit, Imma c/p it here, if anybody’s made it this damn far, I won’t ask they scroll up:

All right, in no particular order, just as things hit me…..

It’s about 7:30 a.m. here in Nashland, this is rotten and off the top of my head, but I could totes picture seeing pumpkin in a Halloween fluff, like - something happens with a pumpkin, it’s dropped or she slices open her hand trying to carve it, is like “[something something] and don’t start calling me pumpkin” and he’s like “Nah…. Punk.” ‘Cause, again - he loves a situational riff & he’s a shortener.

Agreed on princess, I co-sign your gut, he’d say it sneery/as a cut-down on someone who’s afraid to dig in, get a little dirt in the skirt on a hunt or something.

Darlin’ is tricky, because Dean’s not Southern/doesn’t have a drawl unless a touch of Jensen slips out…. and honestly, he’s not got much of an accent from what I’ve heard, though remember that’s going through a Dixieland filter, so consider the source. Might I offer a sub for it? See how “doll” works.

Well, honey’s hitting closer to sounding like him. I’d go “hon”, though, RE: being a shortener. “Hey, hon?” is more casual than “Honey”, and “Honey” also might run the risk of popping a reader back to… [forgive the Rocket inclusion]:

Full quote is “Honey, there ain’t no other men like me.”, but y’all knew that. It’s not on the OH HELL NO list for me, Honey/Hon’s definitely a contender.

But speaking of pinging my “OH HELL NO” radar -

[gasps] Oh, Whoozies…. oh my Whatsis…. sugarplum?

[shakes head vehemently]

* UNLESS* Y/N is a violet-hued fairy in ballet slippers, and they are battling a baby-chomping sentient Nutcracker. But even then, he’d call her ‘Plums.

Sweetie… hmmmm….. you know what might be worth a go? “Sweets”. I could hear “Hey, Sweets” coming out of his mouth. If you could figure a way to make it a lesser of two evils, that’s even better, like…. he pats her on the ass and calls her “sweetcheeks” and she’s all “Oh, but no”, so he downshifts to “sweets”.

“Puddin’“….. erm….. My knee-jerk is no. If it were suuuuper situational, perhaps. I’m drawing a blank on what the situation would be, though, because my mind immediately pops to that episode at the spa…. I just….

I’m hearing it in my mind as if somebody was writing a story where it’s basically a re-hash of that episode - Oh but (tee-hee) this time Y/N got the roofied pudding, and now Dean’s gonna drive her nuts never letting her forget it! Tune in for next week’s episode of Supernatural, guest starring Ordinary McTypical-Chick as Puddin’! [/announcer voice] [cue laugh track], and then I’m all……

Round up on the “Give ‘Er A Try” list:

Honey —> sure why not; “hon” may be better

Sweetie —> ehhhh, probably situational; “sweets” could be worth a try

Pumpkin —-> sooooo situational; and if go there, would 100% roll it into “punk”

Darlin’ —> ehhhh; “doll” suggested sub

….and wasn’t mentioned, but unless it works your personal nerves, from my POV, “babe” doesn’t pull me out of the story if it sneaks into Dean’s dialogue, a la “Hey, babe? You already toss some shells into the trunk?”

Nash’s Three Key Pieces Of Advice For Pulling This Off

1. Who is this person on the receiving end of the nickname - know this, and it’ll narrow down your choices;

2. Do it like Dean: if they have a name, go “-y” or shorten it, or take a situation/circumstance and spin it;

and, possibly the most important -

3. Limit, limit, limit

Make your own parameters for amount of times this is happening in a given piece. I’m just throwing #s - like, = 500 = 0, 501 - 1K = 1, 1.1K - 2.5K = 2, something like that. Take away the pressure of it by making “rules” and you’re free to get your brain back to the story.

Because here it is, y’all - and I’ve said this in other posts - the best thing you can do for yourself or for those you beta is to stop after every scene or paragraph or page or “x” amount of words, whatever your pref is, and ask yourself about what you’ve just read/written:

Who cares? - A.K.A.: Is ____ advancing the plot/the interpersonal dynamics, or not?

Regarding non-nickname stuff: Does it matter that we know about her morning routine? That she had oatmeal because she was out of bagels? The make and model of her car? Her co-workers’ names? Her co-workers at all? What her cat is like? What her cat is named? Her cat at all?

And the same applies here: Does an endearment matter in this particular sentence/moment? I care about the relationships between/amongst the characters, how well they’re grooving with each other [or not], how that weaves together, how it’s integral to the plot, how it impacts the action/the task, how it plays into the climax and resolution [or lack thereof].

Is it ideal to have things coming out of the mouths of the characters we all know ring true? Absolutely. And that’s the other “who cares” here: BIG cares if things that are “un-Dean” creep in. As the adage goes: “When in doubt, don’t”.

So, when stuck on this element, figure out something else to do with the sentence…. and I’d start with 86′ing the nickname. Bet you money most of the time, the message of the sentence will read exactly the same.

You got this.

Thanks for the Q, hope I helped in some fashion and that the curses either wane, or perhaps reach new, interesting heights and volumes, depending on the level of said helpfulness.

#Dear Nash #mrswhozeewhatsis #Let me call you sweetheart #Dean's Dream Gal #and what's in a name #gotta know who they are #and what they're about #and what his normal #patterns are in general #you got this #Nash Advises #Writing Tips #Queueby Dooby Doo #Dad's on a blog post and #he hasn't been queued in a few days #ok fine #Endeanments #why not

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