#already sold the English one
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bunbunsa · 8 months ago
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The German version is here!!
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farawayfromthemoon · 5 months ago
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cmon Berlin you can do better 🥲
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gurugirl · 1 month ago
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The Mushroomer | friendly ghost!harry
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Summary: Y/n moves into a small house in the woods and she soon realizes the house is haunted. But it really turns out to be not so bad at all to have a ghost when he's as kind as the one living with her.
A/n: Harry's a sweet ghost - so nothing scary here. But it is a little sad (with a happy ending). Also, I took some artistic liberties on what ghosts can do with this one shot so you may need to suspend your disbelief a bit. xoxo
Word Count: 11.5k
Warning: smut, talk of depression & suicide, loneliness (Harry's a sad ghost but Y/n makes him happy)
✨���',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
Y/n had been living in the small house in the woods for only a couple of weeks when she started noticing strange things. She'd be typing on her laptop, cozy and focused when suddenly the tea kettle would whistle, breaking her out of the moment and scaring the life out of her. Somehow, not only would her tea kettle be on the burner but it was magically filled with water -both of which she had not done.
Or like the other evening when she was getting ready to settle into bed and she remembered she needed to turn off the lights in her kitchen so she grumpily got up and padded into the living room to see with her own eyes as her kitchen lights shut themselves off. It was nice to not have to walk all that way (which really wasn't all that far) but the creep factor of that happening was quite substantial.
But there were a lot of little things she'd been side-eyeing that made her wonder what was going on. However, she couldn't ignore it that morning. The way the blankets next to her were raised up as if someone were lying underneath them with her.
She had just woken up and her eyes were bleary and tired but the drizzle of morning light shining in her room made it clear that something was in the bed right next to her. Reaching toward the human-sized lump she blinked her eyes slowly and the moment her hand came into contact with the wool it suddenly deflated and dropped to the bed. She sat up and looked around the quiet space of her small room with her heart pounding in her chest.
"Is someone here?"
She was answered with silence. Pulling the blanket back she found exactly what she imagined. Nothing.
But then the kettle was going off and she jumped from the bed, quickly putting her slippers on her feet before dashing into the kitchen to shut off the burner.
"What is going on? Is someone here? Just…" She put her hands over her face in frustration as she groaned and when she pulled her hands away, there was her favorite mug sitting out for her already.
She remembered emptying the kettle and cleaning her mug and putting it away the night before. This was all impossible.
But she was in the mood for a hot cup of tea so she reluctantly grabbed the mug and that's when she saw her tea ball inside already filled with her favorite English breakfast tea leaves.
Pouring the hot water into her mug she peered around the kitchen, "Thank you. If there is someone there. This was nice. But… kind of creepy."
So, Y/n's day was off to an interesting start, and even though she'd been experiencing strange things and there was a small part of her that wondered if perhaps she had some kind of friendly ghost in her house, that day she was especially present and keeping her eyes open for anything odd.
Which led her to do some research on the old house she'd bought. She wondered who'd lived there before her. She only knew what was public. The property tax amount, and how many times the house had been bought and sold over the years (that number was surprisingly high). And that made her wonder if there was a connection. Had others been experiencing strange things in the home too? Had they been so spooked that they left, selling it to the next person to start the process all over again?
Of course, nothing that was happening was scary. Not really. It was strange, yes. It got her heart rate up a few times… but in the end, everything had been friendly or harmless gestures. Helpful even.
She didn't get much writing done that day, but rather she did find some interesting things online. It took her some time to get down to any names of people who'd lived in the house before (she didn't find many), but there was an old article from 1999 about a young professor who lived in town who died after going mushroom picking and eating the wrong kind. The article was more of an informative warning kind of story but there were some details that caught her interest.
The man would often forage for mushrooms being somewhat of an expert, but even with all of his knowledge he still mistook a bad one for a good one. Supposedly he died in his home all alone. And he was called by the name Harry. It didn't say where Harry lived exactly just that he was a professor from the area and he'd lived in the woods.
And that story led her to other smaller accounts of Harry the teacher and mushroomer who lived in the woods. She was so fascinated by the little bits of information she found that she hadn't realized the sun was already setting. She'd been at her desk reading what little she could find about this mysterious man who died in 1985, likely in the very house she was sitting in. He was 30 when he died.
"Mushrooms…" she spoke to herself as she recalled the mushrooms carved into the top of the banisters on the porch.
Closing her laptop she flicked on a lamp and then turned on her front porch light to double-check the wooden banisters and sure enough, mushrooms.
She placed her hand over the tops of them and bent to look at the work. It was crude, not carved by a wood maker but maybe an amateur. Perhaps Harry himself had carved them. Over the years, of course, the wood was aged and worn from the elements but it was clearly meant to be the shape of a mushroom.
She made a mental note to buy some varnish to cover them and make sure they didn't erode further. To keep the artist's work intact.
"I like these," she smiled and looked around herself, not sure if the ghost, or whatever it was, might be watching. She knew she might be losing her mind, entertaining such thoughts, but what else could it be? Surely something was afoot. Luckily, whatever it was, seemed to be kind and liked to get her tea started for her.
Y/n turned on her radio as she made cucumber and cheese sandwiches and hummed along. She'd peek behind herself every now and then in hopes of seeing something but that night nothing more came. Just when she was beginning to find the whole idea of having a ghost exciting, he suddenly wanted to be quiet.
✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
She wanted to sit outside to write that day. Took her hot tea with a little honey that morning and an English muffin with a jammy egg and extra butter. Then she piled the wooden bench with blankets and a couple of pillows and spread herself along the space and began to write.
Y/n loved her solitude. Loved the quiet and the freedom to live her life as she wanted day to day. She might call herself lucky that she didn't have to work a traditional 9-5 job but being a writer and trying to keep on schedule with her publisher was quite difficult at times. But she wouldn't trade the stress of getting her work done on deadline for anything. Especially not when she got to enjoy such peace in her life.
She wasn't rich. Not even close, but she did alright for herself. She'd been able to buy the adorable little house in the woods all on her own after all. So she was grateful for her life.
Content.
When she heard rustling leaves coming from the side of the house she stopped typing and kept her ears perked to listen. It sounded like a large animal moving through from the woods.
Getting up slowly and as quietly as she could she carefully stepped toward the edge of the porch and looked down at the side of the house to see nothing but dried brown leaves.
She was still hoping to see her ghost. Hoping he'd show himself –if there was a ghost (though she was almost certain by then). But everything had been quiet since before she ate dinner the night before.
Pursing her lips, she was a little disappointed that she still had not seen anything substantial yet. But as she turned to walk back to her bench, there, atop her closed laptop was a mushroom. A freshly picked mushroom. She wasn't sure what kind it was but it was clearly wild with a bit of dirt still at its base.
Plucking it up between her pointer finger and thumb she laughed as she moved her eyes all around her, "Is this from you, Harry? Harry the Mushroomer? That's what they call you, you know."
She walked down the steps of her porch to the front yard with the mushroom in her hand and peered around, "Thank you for this, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable eating it. Didn't you die because you ate the wrong kind? Accidentally poisoned yourself?"
Y/n knew that if anyone could see her they'd think she was a crazy woman talking to herself like that. Luckily she had no visible neighbors.
"Well? Are you gonna show yourself or just keep doing little things like this? It's okay if this is it. I don't mind, but it's hard to talk to you when I can't hear or see you."
In almost an instant there was a figure at the limn of her eye and she turned to see a tall man looking at her. She waited for a moment before speaking as his appearance seemed to slowly fill in… like he was being painted to life before her eyes.
He pointed at her hand, "It's safe. I promise."
She looked down at the mushroom in her palm and then back at the man, "Are you… Harry?"
He stepped back, the lines around him seemed to fade and Y/n reached toward him, "Don't leave! Please. I'd like to talk if you can."
"I can't leave."
"You can't… Because you're stuck here? Attached to this house?"
He nodded, the vibrant color of his skin filling in again and she noticed his eyes were a soft green like the moss in the small pond up the path.
"I'm sorry. It must be hard to be stuck like that."
"It is."
"Did you carve those mushrooms there," she pointed toward the banister.
He nodded again. She didn't know if that's just how he was, quiet and shy. Or maybe it was because he was not used to interacting with people anymore.
"Um… thank you for the mushroom. And for the tea. You seem to like to help."
He looked like a real man standing in her front yard with his brown shoes in the dead leaves that were scattered about. He wore a cream-colored sweater and khaki pants.
"I do like to help. You can eat that. They were wrong."
"Who was wrong? About what?"
She watched him blink and look toward the porch before he motioned to the house, "May I?"
Y/n grinned, not quite believing what was happening but fascinated all at the same time, "Of course. It's your house, Harry."
He looked at her for a second, the smallest bit of a smile spread across his face before he nodded and began to move up toward the porch, Y/n following behind him.
She stopped and watched him walk toward the wooden bench and sit down, as if he were too weary to stand, though she never imagined ghosts feeling tired like that. He stared out toward the trees before he spoke, "I did it on purpose. It wasn't an accident."
She stitched her brows together and wrapped an arm around the wooden post at the top of the steps, "You poisoned yourself?"
He nodded, still staring toward the yard and trees with their changing leaves, "I wish I hadn't but I was sad and I wanted to stop feeling sad. And then everyone thought it was just an accident. A mistake. But it wasn't."
Y/n stepped toward him cautiously, not wanting to scare him off, "Can I sit next to you?"
He looked up at her before moving his mournful eyes back toward the woods. She took that as a yes, so she carefully sat on the bench next to her sad ghost.
"Why were you sad?"
He shook his head slowly, "Lonely. But it's much worse like this. No one wants to talk to a spirit. Everyone gets spooked."
"You can talk to me. I'm not spooked," she spoke quietly and he looked at her again, brows softening as she continued, "If you want we can be friends."
"Why?"
"Why what? Why am I not spooked? Why do I want to be your friend?" She raised her brows.
Harry didn't answer, though. He only kept his gaze on hers. She figured his why was to all of the above. He wasn't used to people anymore.
"Well… you've been very welcoming toward me since I moved in. Kind even. Getting my tea ready, that was clever," she laughed and watched as his shoulders seemed to relax, "That's not spooky. It was helpful. And I like that you wanted to be nice so I'd like to be your friend."
"Okay. Just know… I can't leave. So if you feel bothered the best I can do is step outside or into another room. People have tried having the house blessed. A priest came in once and tried to get me to leave. I wish I wasn't stuck here. I hoped that somehow that would work, with the priest, but it didn't. I'd rather be gone but instead, I'm trapped, halfway here and halfway there."
"So, you're the kind of ghost that can pick things up and –well you also look like a real man too. To me you do."
He shrugged, "I don't know. I guess. I've never met another ghost."
The pair sat on the porch together for nearly two hours. Y/n was intrigued and had quite a few questions but she also told him about herself. At one point Harry could see she was chilled so he handed her blanket from underneath him and helped her drape it over her shoulders.
She couldn't imagine how a man like him had found such a fate. Every now and then when he spoke she noted that he had a natural charisma, a charm that certainly had caught the eye of a few ladies at one time. He was smart and kind. And she couldn't help but notice how handsome he was too. But mostly he was sad. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and hold him if he'd let her. Tell him he wouldn't be alone anymore and that it was going to be okay.
When she made dinner for herself she used the mushroom he'd picked and he told her where she could find more of them. That they could forage together if she were up for it. He made her tea and told her that she liked her tea the same way his mother did.
It felt like she was talking to someone she knew a long time ago and that they were just reconnecting after years of being apart. It took a bit to warm up but once they got going Harry was a regular conversationalist. She could picture him as a professor in front of students relating his biology teachings to a story about being chased down the street by a pack of wild dogs.
He was funny. Y/n liked Harry a lot. She hadn't really gotten any work done that day but there wasn't a part of her that regretted that.
When the sun had gone down she turned on all the lamps and let Harry sit in her comfy chair near the wood-burning stove (that he installed all by himself in 1981) and take his pick of book to read from her bookshelf.
She finally wound up getting a decent amount of writing done with Harry just there reading. It was nice to have a companion with her. She loved her peace and quiet but it was easy for her to adjust to Harry being there. Maybe because he had been there all along.
When she was getting tired and couldn't write anymore she looked over at Harry and noticed that he was still fully immersed in the book, "I think I'm gonna go to bed. Um… you can do whatever you want. And no need to hide or anything. Okay? I like you around."
"Oh. Yeah. Of course. I'll just be here. Won't bother you."
Y/n smiled at him as she stood up, "You're not a bother. I'll see you in the morning?"
He smiled and nodded at her, "Thank you."
✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
"So you do sleep at all, Harry?" Y/n asked him as she poured hot water over her tea.
"Yes. That's mostly all I do. I like to be unconscious. Pretend I'm not here."
Y/n felt so sad hearing the way he spoke. Even in death, he seemed to be depressed, sad.
"And where do you normally sleep?"
He shrugged, the book he had been reading from the night before was in his hand, "Wherever. In the bed sometimes."
Y/n looked at him, squinting her eyes, "Next to me? Like you did the other morning?"
He looked down and nodded, "Sorry. I won't do it again. Just like to feel like I'm not alone and when you're sleeping I know I won't scare you because you won't even know I'm there. But," he looked up at her quickly, "I've never done anything weird. I would never. It was just to be closer is all. Not in a weird way-" he shook his head and grumbled something under his breath, "But that still sounds weird to you I'm sure. I meant no harm."
She reached her hand toward him, almost not expecting to feel anything but when her finger grazed the fabric of his sweater she was startled and stepped back. But the moment Harry realized she'd gotten spooked he was gone in an instant. The book he'd been holding lying on her tile countertop.
"No. Harry don't leave, please. I… just didn't expect to be able to touch your sweater. It's… I promise it wasn't because I was scared of you. Please come back. I'm sorry. This is all new for me and I was surprised is all."
She saw movement out of the corner of her eye and turned to see him, but he was hazy, not quite there, "I don't want to scare you. I'm used to just staying in the shadows, Y/n. I don't think I could bear having you be frightened of me."
Moving toward him slowly she put her palms facing out to him in conciliation, "I'm not frightened. I promise. I just didn't realize I'd feel it when I reached for you. I want you to stay. I like you here. I like your company. I like seeing you. And now I'll know better than to be surprised when I can feel the wool on your sweater next time."
"Are you sure?"
She nodded, putting her hands down to her side, "I'm sure. And I don't want you to be skittish around me either. You don't need to disappear like that. Let's just get used to one another okay? But I'm not frightened. I think I already prefer you to most people I've met, in fact."
That got him smiling and it almost appeared like he was blushing as he looked down at the floor, a dimple scored into his cheek.
Quite the handsome ghost when he was smiling. He blinked his eyes as his form became tangible again, corporeal.
She took a deep breath and reached for him again, slowly that time, placing her palm up for him to reach out toward. She watched as he lifted his hand and gradually pushed it forward until she could feel the whispy brush of his skin on her fingertips before he pressed his palm over hers. Like a real person, with skin and everything.
"I can feel you. Can you feel me too?" She asked.
He nodded as his grin spread, "Yes. That's nice."
"It is nice. See? Nothing to worry about."
"Nothing to worry about," he repeated, his eyes on hers.
"Can we rewind? Go back to what we were just talking about before I got all jumpy? About you sleeping in the bed?"
"Okay."
She moved her fingers around his hand and squeezed it gently, "If you ever need to be close, it's okay if you come to sleep in my bed with me. This is your house too, Harry. It was your house first. I don't want you to feel lonely in your home. Just because you're… well, a spirit, that doesn't mean you deserve a life of isolation. I'm your friend now. Okay?"
"Okay. Thank you."
Y/n found that having Harry around somehow inspired her and kept her focused. She'd gotten more work done than she had in a very long time. Perhaps it was just that there was another presence there with her, watching and paying attention. Somehow it seemed to keep her on task. He was quiet most of the day. He'd read or take walks outside and bring mushrooms back when he found them. In the evenings they'd chat and she often caught herself wishing he was a real live man because if she were being very honest he had all the qualities she'd want in a partner. But on top of that, he was tortuously handsome. And it seemed the more she knew of him the more attractive he was.
He was quite humorous at times, a natural storyteller. And it seemed he enjoyed making her smile. He listened to her talk as well and remembered every detail of every word she spoke. Like she was worth listening to. It's something she didn't often find with other people.
Sleeping next to him at night was also increasingly difficult as now there was a sentient and conscious being lying next to her when she was feeling a bit lustful (as did happen on occasion inevitably). But there was little she could do to satiate herself in her bed when Harry was there too.
So she wound up changing her schedule slightly, to have her showers at night and find relief under the warm stream of water before she climbed into bed with him, who took up a lot more space than one would assume a ghost would.
He was always perfectly polite. Too polite maybe. But then again she had no idea how that would work with him anyway. Yes, she could feel his skin and touch his clothes and once had the pleasure of running her fingers into his hair… but certainly they couldn't… get intimate?
Though, she'd imagined how his lips might feel or those big hands on her hips or her waist. She'd imagine his eyes peering at her as he undressed (she'd never seen him remove any clothing but she often wondered what was under his clothes). She knew it was wrong. Felt guilty for thinking about him like that.
But she was a warm-blooded woman with certain needs that every other woman had just the same. And Harry, ghost or not, was easy to look and he was even easier to trust.
He was sweet.
And she was ovulating.
So even taking care of herself in her shower didn't quite scratch the itch by the time she got into the bedroom to find Harry already sitting with the blankets over his lap and his back against the headboard and his nose in a book. It was like having a really hot friend who lived with you who you knew you could never do anything like that with.
"Feel better?" He asked her as he closed the book and watched her take off her sweater.
She didn't remember telling him she hadn't felt good before her shower. In fact, he hadn't ever asked her before if she felt better after her shower so it made her wonder if he was paying closer attention than she realized. Could he tell that she had a change in mood? That her hormones were fluctuating? Surely not.
"Um, I think a little better," she smiled and slid into the bed, wishing she could climb into his lap and lift up his sweater to feel his skin. She was curious about him and wondered if there was more to explore with him. Was there anything under the clothes? Did he ever have those natural human urges he likely had when he was living?
"You seem a little tense. Would you like a tea? I think camomile is good for helping you calm."
She sighed, "I'm just… yeah. A tea sounds good. Maybe that'll help."
Harry left her alone in her room and she watched as the light in the kitchen gently spread out and illuminated the hallway off the bedroom. With a few minutes to herself, she reached into her soft night pants and rubbed over her panties. It was risky and she knew he might return any minute but she was hidden by the covers over her lap.
And it felt good. Obviously, the shower had been nice but there was something about doing it in her own bed on a dry surface that was her favorite. And she was already wetting the material of her underwear as she pushed the fabric aside and pressed her fingers directly over her clit. She could be quick.
A quiet gasp fell from her lips when she began hitting the right spot, fingers quickly swiping back and forth, body heating, heart pounding.
But then he was there at the door with a steaming mug in his hands, standing still like he'd been the one to see a ghost. She was covered up but by the way he was looking at her…
She slowly moved her hand away and smiled, "Uh, that was fast. Thank you."
He placed the mug on the table next to her bed quietly and looked away from her, "I can give you some privacy. I'm sorry."
Oh. He knew what she was up to. She'd been so stupid to think she could rub one out fast enough without him realizing.
"No, I'm sorry. I… since you've been around, or since I knew you were here I have to kind of… God, I'm embarrassed," she put her face in her hands and groaned.
"Don't feel embarrassed. It's normal. Nothing shameful about any of that. I was a biology professor after all."
Y/n looked up at him, "You're always too nice, Harry. I feel so awful. You probably don't even… well… you know. Things are different for you now than when you were alive?"
He cocked his head to the side, "Things are different yes. But if you mean in terms of feeling stirred, aroused… I can -still. But it's been a very long time."
She swallowed, unable to quite comprehend how that was possible, "So… you, as a ghost, can like feel that way? Does your body react as well?"
He puffed out a laugh and looked down at the wood floors below his feet, "Yes. Mostly. I still have all the feelings and emotions within my consciousness as when I was alive. And yes, I feel it and it can be visible if I let it."
Visible. That did nothing to quell her growing curiosity.
"That's… I guess I don't really know much about spirits, but I'm surprised."
"To be honest, I don't know much about myself like this either. I just know I still feel emotions and physically can feel…. excited. And that I can only go as far as the perimeter of the land this house is on. If I step past the boundary I wind up back inside the house. You're the first person I've really interacted with. Everyone else was terrified. I don't blame them."
"You can come back if you want," she patted the spot on the bed next to her. "If I didn't make you uncomfortable. I'm good now I think. Sorry to make this weird."
"Are you sure? I can leave for a bit–"
"No. No, I'm over it now," she took a sip of the tea he'd made her. He always seemed to know exactly how to make her tea.
Harry pulled the blankets back and settled into bed next to her before she flicked off the light on her lamp.
"I'm sorry I interrupted."
"Don't be sorry. You did nothing wrong."
She wished she could ask him to hold her. Just to be in his arms, to know what that would feel like. And she was sure that if she asked he would because he was so kind. But he'd just caught her playing with herself and she felt like a pervert and she was sure he'd wonder what her intentions were. Hell, she wasn't even sure of her own intentions at that point.
So, she closed her eyes and tried to push down how embarrassed she felt and the subtle ache between her thighs. Perhaps she'd get on birth control so she wouldn't ovulate anymore. She felt out of control, led by her id, her hormones calling the shots.
Eventually, she found sleep, and for a while, she forgot all about her misdeed and her aroused state in exchange for much-needed rest.
But upon waking she found that she'd snuggled into Harry tightly. Her cheek smushed against the sweater over his chest and his arms were placed around her back. It felt like waking up in the arms of a real man. It was soft and cozy. She felt warm and safe.
She knew he could sleep. He told her as much so she wasn't sure if he was awake or not which was her reason to keep still and bask in the moment. As much as she loved her solitude, it hadn't dawned on her until then how much she missed human contact. It was lovely to feel him so close like that. He felt solid as if he had a real live body.
Slowly the light from the sun began to brighten her room as the morning grew later. She probably should get up but it was so hard to peel herself away from Harry. Not only did she not want to wake him, she wanted to enjoy him holding her for as long as she could.
"If you need to get up you can."
She startled, tilting her head back to look up at him, "I didn't know you were awake. I didn't want to -wake you."
He was cute. His face half-covered with her pillow as he looked down at her, "I know. But I am awake. You can stay here like this for as long as you like, though. I don't mind."
Harry adjusted his face into the pillow, pink lips set in a soft smile as he kept his eyes on hers. He was beautiful and she could think of nothing better to do in that moment than to reach her hand up to his neck and stretch up toward him so she could give him a quick peck on his mouth.
Maybe it was her sleepy brain or just the soft moment they were enveloped in together. Perhaps it was the way he was looking at her that did it. But whatever made her do it felt like something she needed to do. To feel.
And then he kissed her back. It was like kissing a man. A real live man. His palms slid over her back softly, upward to her shoulder blades as he continued moving his lips with hers. Gentle and slow. Sleepy.
It did nothing to make her hormones calm. Which just led to her sliding her hand down his sturdy chest and to his hip. She wouldn't take it too far, she was just curious what the skin under his sweater would feel like as she edged the tips of her fingers upward and he was still real underneath too. Taut skin and sinew over muscle and bone. Moving her palm higher up his stomach she found herself quite pleasantly surprised by the way he felt under her hand.
But he stopped abruptly, sitting up and clambering out of bed, "Sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't know why I did that. You… I'm really sorry."
She looked up at him from her spot on the bed and blinked her tired eyes, "Why are you sorry? I kissed you first."
"You did?" He shook his head, "I thought I started it. I'm not used to this. I don't know what I'm doing." He ran his hands into his hair and stepped around the bed toward the door, "I'm sorry. I think I need to… just some time to think."
She watched him walk away out of sight, blindsided by what had just happened. Of course, the whole thing was wild. It was insane even. He was a ghost. It wasn't like they could be together. She wished things were different, she really did. She needed to pull herself together. Harry had real feelings, he'd told her as much.
Taking a warm shower she tried to reason with herself about what had happened. But the more she considered it all, the more she wondered what a future would look like if she were to fall in love with a ghost. She didn't want to indulge in those thoughts but she couldn't help it. She didn't like being around people and rarely needed to leave her little house. Would it be so bad to just be with Harry? He was lonely and needed companionship just like she did and she really enjoyed his company. He seemed to be the perfect companion, the only issue being that he was technically dead. And she had no idea how a physical relationship would work but she was beginning to think, after that kiss, that was in fact possible.
She could stay "single" forever and if anyone asked why she never married or dated she'd just say she preferred to be alone. No one would need to know about Harry.
Y/n shook her head as she dried her hair. She was losing it. Why was her mind going there? Yes, maybe she was a little lonely at times, and he was kind and nice to talk to, and he was clearly a very attractive… specter. But he wasn't a living man.
Opening up her laptop after having made herself a tea, she tried to ignore the pit in her stomach. Harry hadn't come back. Or if he had he wasn't showing himself to her. Had it really been all that bad for them to kiss? Probably. She shouldn't have done it. And now he was the one who was spooked. She couldn't blame him. It'd been a long time since he'd had a person to even talk to who knew of his existence and the one that he finally does show himself to winds up developing silly feelings for him and wants to kiss.
Y/n hardly got any writing done that day. Harry stayed away. The house was quiet. She didn't want to push him to show himself or to talk to her. If he needed space, she'd give it to him.
✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
She figured that the worst part about having a ghost was knowing he was there but not knowing where he was or what he was seeing her do. If he was even watching. Harry didn't return that first night nor the following day. He didn't sleep next to her in bed and he didn't prepare her tea.
She started to wonder if he was going to come back at all.
"I'm sorry, Harry. I'm sorry for scaring you like that. I hope you can forgive me and come back. I promise I'll never be so reckless again. I just had a lapse in judgment."
Her phone rang, startling her from her speech to her ghost. She had an inkling he was there and listening.
"Hello?"
It was her cousin Sil. She had promised to bring over a small kitchen table, something Y/n didn't have when she first moved into the house.
"Oh, tonight? Sure. Um… yeah. I'll be here."
She would be happy to have a kitchen table and chairs finally but she wasn't really up for company. Hopefully, Sil would be in and out quickly, though getting to her house in the woods was quite the drive.
"Harry, my cousin is coming to drop off some furniture. I'm just letting you know," she looked around the space and the room was empty and quiet still. Her heart dropped as she sighed.
But she had to stop moping and pull herself together before Sil arrived. She put on something a little nicer and swiped a little mascara onto her lashes before spritzing herself with her favorite perfume. Then she filled her kettle with fresh water and pulled down a couple of mugs and plates and then sliced up strawberries and cantaloupe.
She kept herself busy until she heard a knock at her door and put on a smile before opening it to see not only Sil, but a man wearing a thick flannel just behind her.
"This is Memo. He offered to help with the table. It's kind of heavy."
"Oh, of course! Thank you! And it's nice to meet you, Memo."
Y/n propped open the door and then she and Sil got to work carrying in the chairs as Memo shimmied the table inside on his own. When everything was set up in her little kitchen she was quite pleased with the way it looked.
"I love it. Thank you so much, Sil," she pulled her cousin in for a hug and then reached for Memo's arm and squeezed, "And I appreciate your help. Thank you."
"Your house is amazing. Ever get lonely living out here by yourself?"
Y/n looked up at the man and shrugged, "Um… not really. I like the peace out here. It's great for inspiration."
"She's a writer," Sil interjected, "Already has two published books and one on the way. She's the famous one I was talking about."
Y/n laughed and put her hand up, "I'm not famous. That's an exaggeration…"
"Well, she's a published author and her first book sold almost, what… like 50,000 copies?"
"That's average at best. I'm not… I'm lucky but I'm not anywhere near famous," Y/n looked at Memo and then at her cousin. "It pays the bills. And I love it, so…" She turned toward her kitchen counter, wanting to change the subject, "Would you guys care for some tea or coffee? I've got fruit sliced up as well?"
"I could go for some tea. Thank you, Y/n."
Memo smiled at her softly and her cousin raised her brows with a nod, "Sure. We'll stay a little longer."
Y/n prepared tea and placed the fruit and plates on her new kitchen table before joining Sil and Memo to sit. She learned that Memo was Sil's neighbor and when Y/n commented that she thought they were cute together Sil quickly corrected her cousin, "Oh, we're not… No," she laughed. "He's just a friend."
"I'm as single as they come," he winked at Y/n before taking another sip of his tea.
She found that to be a strange thing to say. Was he suggesting something? Y/n didn't know but she definitely wasn't interested. Her mind was still on Harry and wondering where he was, if he was watching everything.
When the fruit was all eaten and their mugs were dry Y/n got up to place everything in her sink and Memo followed, "I can help. Let me wash the dishes."
She looked back at Sil who was grinning, a raised brow in her direction. Y/n shook her head and rolled her eyes. Maybe it was a setup. She'd be nice but there was no way in hell–
"What the… shit!" Memo stepped back from the sink quickly and turned, his arms out exasperatedly.
He had water all over the front of his flannel and Y/n covered her mouth to hide her laugh.
"Something just… I turned on the water and it was like the stream just sprayed out right at me. Got all over my shirt!"
Sil stepped passed Memo and turned off the water then turned it back on to check, "Seems okay now. Maybe it was just air in the pipe or something?"
"Sorry. That has never happened. Would you like a towel?" Y/n offered.
"Yeah. If it's no bother."
When Y/n walked into the hallway to grab a towel she felt someone behind her. She brightened up as she turned, hoping to see Harry but found the other male standing there with her, plucking at his shirt.
"Here," she handed him a white towel, "I'm really sorry about your shirt."
Memo nodded as he dabbed at himself, "Yeah it's just water. My shirt'll be fine. Just a little embarrassed."
Y/n laughed, "Embarrassed? Why?"
"Got my shirt all well and startled everyone. Especially in front of a pretty girl. Little bit of a hit to my ego."
Y/n's brows stitched together, "Oh. Well, don't worry. I really don't care–"
"Would you… Well, we're about to leave and I thought maybe I could give you my number or something?"
There was no way she was going to call Memo or entertain anything more with him. But she decided to play dumb and just go along with it. She'd take his number and then lose it. Not that he wasn't a good-looking guy. And he was probably perfectly nice (he seemed nice). In a different world, one where she was more outgoing and liked to meet new people, maybe she'd actually be interested.
"Uh…"
Suddenly the hallway light flicked on and her TV came on in the living room, volume all the way up. The lamp in the corner flashing on and off and then on again.
Y/n quickly slid past Memo to turn her television off, one hand cupping her ear as she aimed the remote at her TV.
Sil looked spooked as she stepped out of the kitchen and then Memo suddenly rushed in, tripping as he cursed, "What the fuck?"
Everyone stood in shock staring at one another when all the lights in the house went off and Memo gasped, "Shit! What is that?!" The sound of someone running into her coffee table and something slamming into the wall had Y/n rushing to flick her lights back on.
Memo was swinging into the air on his ass next to the wall, "Something just pushed me against the wall!"
Sil put her hand out to help Memo stand up and then looked back at Y/n in worry, "Is this place like… haunted? What was that?"
She shook her head, "I don't know. You guys should probably leave, though. I'll clean up. I'm really sorry about this."
Memo stepped toward Y/n, "You need to come with us. It's not safe. It felt like someone grabbed my shirt and pushed me… slammed me! Whatever it is, is very strong and very angry."
Shaking her head she looked from her cousin to Memo, "No. I'll be fine. I promise."
It took a little convincing for Sil and Memo to accept that Y/n wasn't going to be leaving with them with Sil pouting and giving her a long hug outside, "Are you sure? I'm going to call you when we get back. I'm really worried about what just happened in there."
"I'll be fine. Okay? You don't need to worry about anything."
When they were down the street Y/n let out a breath and closed her eyes. She knew exactly what had happened in there.
It was Harry. Her gentle, easily spooked ghost, who had somehow flipped a switch and scared the shit out of Memo and her cousin.
When she stepped inside she straightened out her coffee table and looked around the living room, "Harry? Please come out and talk to me. I need to see you, okay? I'm not mad about what you just did but I think we need to talk about it. About why you did that."
She was startled when she turned and there he was. She had expected to need to plead with him for a little longer.
"I'm sorry."
Looking up at him Y/n shook her head, "Why did you do that? Was it because you didn't like him? Memo?"
He nodded, "I didn't like how he was looking at you when you'd turn away. Like you were a piece of meat or something. He was flirting with you."
She smiled, "You didn't like him flirting with me?"
"It's just that… I don't know," Harry turned and ran his fingers into his hair, "I'm stuck. I don't get to have anything good but people like… Memo," he spat the name like it was bitter in his mouth, "Get to enjoy whatever they want." He turned to look at her again, "He could have you if he wanted. It's so easy for him."
"Well, you're wrong. He can't have me if I'm not interested, which I'm not. Not my type."
"He's not?"
She shook her head, "No."
Harry groaned and looked down at the floor, "Doesn't matter anyway, does it? No matter how I feel about anything, about you… I don't get to have you. I don't get to fall in love and live happily ever after. I've made it so that I'll suffer in sadness forever. This is what I deserve for what I did to myself. Might as well watch you fall in love with another man while I'm at it."
Stepping toward him, she slowly reached her hand out toward his, "Hey, look at me."
She swore it was like looking at a real man. His eyes were so green and so sad as he placed his gaze on hers. "Is that what you want? That we could be –together?"
"Doesn't matter what I want."
She took his hand in hers, "Yes it does. It matters. You matter to me. And to be honest," she shrugged, keeping her eyes on his, "As long as I'm here and you're here, I don't think I need anyone else."
Frown lines carved in between his eyes as he looked down at her hand, "You can't say that. You don't know. I can't give you what you need."
"And what is it you think I need that you can't give me?"
"A real relationship. I couldn't meet your family or… anyone. I couldn't –touch you. Not really. I know this doesn't feel the same," he squeezed at her fingers. "It's not warm. It's not real. And if you wanted to have a family… well obviously I can't give you that either."
"Your hand feels pretty real to me, Harry. It's not quite as warm as if you were flesh and blood but you're firm against my skin. I feel you. And that kiss… I can't stop thinking about how nice it was. I liked that. I like how you did it."
"Really?"
A wider grin spread over her face as she watched the edge of his lip quirk upward, "And I've never wanted kids anyway so I don't care about that."
"You don't?"
Shaking her head she smiled, "Never. But we haven't known each other all that long so you wouldn't have known that about me. You also wouldn't have known that I don't really like going out unless I have to. It's why I bought this house. To be away from people. But I do get lonely so when I met you it felt like a special gift."
"When you moved in it did feel different for me too. I wanted to be your friend right off."
"See? We can be friends. We can maybe even be more. I know it's weird probably… I'm not particularly normal, though. But… I was already imagining what it might be like. You and me. It's not perfect but life isn't perfect and maybe we can find some happiness together."
Harry had been jealous of Memo, Y/n had figured that much. He hadn't really hurt him, just scared him. And in a way, she was glad that he was spooked and left relatively quickly so she didn't have to take his number and then sit in that awkward moment where she didn't give him hers back or have to explain later to her cousin why she never called him.
What would she use as her reason? Well, she'd probably simply just say she wasn't interested. But knowing Sil, there would be some pushback – You don't even really know him. He's the sweetest! Give him one date…
The real explanation, which she'd be unable to express, would be that she had already met someone and she wanted to find out what would happen with it. That the ghost that lived in her house with her, the one who'd pushed Memo, was warmer, sweeter, smarter, and more handsome than Memo by leaps and bounds.
Not that Memo wasn't a catch. But Y/n liked Harry much more. Even if he was a ghost. And maybe him being a ghost was better for her in a way. Of course, she was insane. Perhaps if she were a more well-adjusted person with healthy relationships she'd be interested in living men. But most men made her uncomfortable.
"What if –we just see?" Y/n placed her hand on his arm over his sweater as she kept his hand in hers, "Would that be okay with you?"
"I just don't think I can satisfy you how you need."
"So far you've done a great job of making me happy. I haven't felt this way about someone before. It's unconventional, yes, I know. But so what?"
He turned to face her, "So what…" he mimicked her words before he moved his hand to place at her hip. She could feel the weight of it on her side, "I can kiss you again?"
"Yes, Harry. Please do."
He leaned down slowly before she felt his nose bump into hers and then his lips press over her mouth. And it was sweet and emotional. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her in close as if he realized suddenly he couldn't let her get away.
It was different than kissing someone with skin and warm blood and saliva on their tongue. But she could feel it. Feel him pressed into her, his body his mouth, his hands on her back. She could feel his neck on her palm and it might have just been better than any other kiss ever. Because it was Harry she was kissing.
She felt him open his mouth and close his lips around her bottom lip, felt him poke his tongue against hers… so different but still it was real and so nice. He was conscious and he was kissing her and holding her.
Y/n pushed her hand up his neck and let her fingers card through his hair, whispy silk between her fingers. Every bit of him had mass even if it didn't feel quite the same, it was so close and that only excited her, made her insides light up and liquify.
She could tell he really seemed to enjoy it too, small moans fell from his throat as he brought a hand up to her jaw and kissed downward to her neck. Like he knew what he was doing. But he did know, didn't he? He was once a man, living on earth, meeting women and no doubt had at least some experience.
Y/n couldn't imagine that someone who looked like Harry would have trouble in that department. So he knew what he was doing.
And when he moved against her hips she felt a solid lump under his pants poking against her. Even though he said that it could be visible and that he could feel aroused, it still surprised her. Especially that she could feel it. A decent-sized lump. And she wouldn't classify that as just a lump either… more like the bulge of a man who was nicely endowed.
Her body was hot. She needed more. Gripping onto his back she pasted herself against him, letting him curve around her as he kissed her neck and her jaw. He was better than any man she'd met already. Sensual and full of emotion.
When he placed his mouth back against hers she realized that her back was pressed into the wall. She hadn't even realized they'd moved at all. With a moan, she raised her leg and hitched her thigh over his hip. Part of her thought that might deter him or make him stop. Maybe he'd be too shy or he'd tell her they didn't need to do that, but what happened instead was that he went in harder, hips glued to hers as he reached down to grasp her thigh to keep it in place.
And now the swollen bulge was pressed over her dress right where her pelvis was and he rocked against her.
"Oh god… Harry…." her words were mushed into his mouth as he kept kissing her.
"Y/n…"
"Let's go to bed."
Again, she thought perhaps it might be too much for him. That he'd try and slow down or maybe he'd back away… But she gasped when he picked her up and held her under her thighs and brought her to the bedroom. Like he'd just been waiting for permission and the shy and conflicted man from earlier was all but gone.
Her head was placed on her pillow, with his palm under her neck as he smothered her mouth with his. Y/n moved her legs apart for him and he settled against her, using his free hand to clasp over her hip.
It felt so good to be with him that way. It was exciting and soft and it made her insides ache. Reaching down for the button on his trousers he parted from the kiss and looked down at her hands as she pulled his pants open.
"I don't know if… it's gonna be different. I haven't done this before. Like this."
"It's okay. Will it feel good for you?"
He nodded, "Yes. I can still feel like that. Just don't know what'll be like for you."
Y/n bit her lip and pushed herself up, "I'm gonna take off my dress. Okay?"
"Okay. Should I… I don't know what to do."
It was funny that only moments before he was carrying her to the bed but now he was unsure of himself once again. She figured it would take some getting used to, "Can your clothes come off? Is it possible?"
"Yes. Should I take them off?"
Y/n smiled and cupped his cheek, "If you want to. If you want to find out what it'll feel like with me. It's up to you."
He nodded and pulled at his sweater, bringing it up over his head and Y/n reached for his torso, smoothing her hand up to his pecs and shoulders. He was fit and looked strong. Tattoos on his chest and his arms. It wasn't what she expected exactly. She had seen the peek of tattoos on his hand but hadn't imagined he had many more. She'd been wrong.
Lifting herself she slid her dress off and unplucked her bra to get rid of the uncomfortable thing, tossing them to the floor as she watched him bring his pants down. He had on blue boxer shorts. She didn't want to let her mind go there, but she wondered if those were the last clothes he wore as a living person. Most likely.
He looked at her, searching her face and then his gaze dropped over her body. Her breasts, her tummy, her panties. She reached for his hand to place on her breast, "What does it feel like?"
Harry blinked his eyes closed, "It feels real." He reached up with his other hand to cup her opposite side and softly massaged, opening his eyes to watch as his palms smushed and slid over her skin.
Y/n inhaled as she let him group and knead. The gentle fondling was perfect.
Harry adjusted his position, bending his knees as he leaned in and looked at her, mouth nearing her nipple, "Can I?"
Nodding she placed her hand in his hair when she felt his mouth on her tit. She could hardly tell the difference. It wasn't wet and warm but his mouth was on her. He switched sides and focused on her nipple.
"Fuck… Harry that feels good."
Looking up at her he pulled away, "Does it?"
"Yes. You're really good. I like this. How do you feel?"
"I like it too. A lot. I feel…" he shook his head, lips parted, "Like a man. Like I'm alive again."
Y/n reached down for his thigh and ran her hand upward, "Can I touch you too?"
He looked down at his lap, blue boxer shorts tented from his erection as he nodded and shifted to his knees so he could bring them down and off.
And fuck if he just didn't look completely real. Like a live man with a big cock and soft green eyes looking at her for approval.
Y/n got to her knees and dragged her hands down his chest and over the silky bits of hair, "You're very handsome. I've never seen a more attractive man, Harry. Everything about you…"
When her palm found the underside of him there was weight to it. Bulk. She was having a difficult time understanding it all. That he wasn't flesh, nor alive, but that he was conscious and he was solid. The moment her palm dragged upward on his length, fingers curling around his shaft he sputtered a deep moan.
"Feels good?"
He nodded, "Just like when I… from a long time ago."
"When you were still alive? When you had a woman in your bed with you?"
He nodded again, "Yes."
"Good. I want to make you feel good."
He moaned again as she worked her fist over him. He was long and he had girth. A very nice cock for a ghost, she laughed to herself about how her inner dialogue was working itself out.
"I want to make you feel good too," he placed a hand at her hip over her cotton panties and she smiled at him. Of course, he did. Harry seemed like a giver. That much she did know.
Releasing him from her hand, she peeled her panties off and Harry quickly pushed her down to the bed and tucked in between her legs, hands sliding up her inner thighs, "You're so pretty."
Y/n giggled and turned her eyes to her ceiling. No one would ever believe she was doing something like this. Hell, she hardly believed it herself. When she looked back at Harry she pulled his hand to bring up to her center, "You can touch if you want. In fact, you can do whatever you like. I trust you."
His lips parted as he grazed his fingertips through her labia and kept his eyes on her pussy. Soft strokes up and down like he was inspecting until he slid his pointer finger up to her clit and looked into her eyes as he started to circle, "You're getting wet. That feels good?"
A laugh puffed from her lips as she nodded, "It feels so good. You make me wet, Harry."
His brows pinched together as he leaned over her body to kiss her, fingers still gently circling her bud. She reached down to stroke him in her hand, making him moan into her mouth.
He thrust into her hand softly as he pressed a finger inside of her. She inhaled sharply, "Yes…"
"Yeah?" He panted against her mouth, finger tucked inside of her thrusting as she pumped him the best she could with the angle.
And he might have been a ghost but when he added another finger the gushy sound her pussy made couldn't be mistaken. As if something solid was plunging into her. Which made her certain his dick would be the same. Better.
Pushing at his chest he backed away from the kiss as she pulled his shaft, angling his tip at her mons, just above where he was pumping his fingers into her, "You can if you want. I think it'll feel good."
He didn't say anything but when he pulled his fingers out and grasped around his cock, hand over hers he kept his pupils pinned to her eyes as he dragged his tip through her pussylips and down to her opening.
The moment he began to penetrate they both dropped their mouths open. It felt just like it should. Two people connecting with their bodies and their emotions. The friction felt different inside of her but she could feel the weight and the circumference of him slowly sliding into her walls.
As he blew out a harsh breath, she could feel it on her neck. It wasn't humid nor warm, but she felt the draft against her skin as he buried in.
"Can you feel me?"
Y/n reached her hands around his back, "I can feel all of you. Keep going."
He dropped his hips down against hers, pushing himself in and then easing back, dragging through her insides deliciously.
"I can feel how wet it is around me. So warm… Squeezing…"
She panted as she placed her feet flat on the mattress and rolled up against him, her clit pressing into his pelvis as he rocked into her so gently. So easy and so soft, but the swollen length inside of her was anything but soft. She felt every inch of it as he worked in and pulled back.
"It's so hard. Harry, you feel so good," she mewled before he pushed his lips against hers again.
Her old bed creaked in time with his languid pace. He held her tight, one hand at the back of her head and the other wrapped under her back as he fucked himself into her warm, gummy channel.
As fantastic as Y/n felt she imagined for him it was even better. He could feel her temperature and the moisture of her arousal, he could feel the tightness of her around him as he drove into her and surely he could feel her heart pounding in her chest.
She was in heaven. Y/n would swear off men forever if she could have this with Harry. They could have soft, lazy days together in silence, go mushroom hunting together in the afternoons, and have deep conversations about the world and biology and books they'd read… then go to bed together every night with full hearts. She'd be satisfied with him. It didn't matter what people thought of her. The strange woman who moved into the woods to live alone, never married or had kids, never had an interest in dating…
He grunted as he began to plunge in harder. He was feeling it. Just like any man would. His release, whatever that might look like for a ghost, was coming. She lifted her hips against his thrusts as he wound his lips around her slowly. The faster he moved his hips and worked into her the louder her mattress squeaked under her.
She gasped as he ground into her, swiveling his hips and groaning into her mouth, "Right there…" She panted.
If he kept his pelvis against her clit she'd come, "Don't stop. Just like that…"
So he rocked against her like she wanted, pelvis pasted to her clit as he tucked in deeper and filled her insides with his sturdy mass. She felt his hand move down, fingers wrapping around the back of her neck as she ran her tongue against his.
With their bodies glued together, Harry's big cock stuffing her and his hips down against hers she began to shake. He flexed his glutes and thighs as he continued sliding into her, raking against her walls, patting against her softly when her metal headboard started to hit her wall with every other plunge.
Harry stopped abruptly but Y/n draped a leg over his low back and pressed her hands into his bum, "Keep going. I'm gonna come…"
Shifting against her he prodded into her guts that time, making her hiss as he dragged his lips down to her neck.
"Oh fuck…" she moaned into the dark room as he plowed into her tummy, sucking on her delicate skin between panted breaths.
She loved how it felt to have him curled around her like that, arm holding her close, hips pressed against hers as his thighs pushed against the underside of her own. She loved how he did it so tenderly but so needy.
Because it'd been a long long time since he'd had sex. The poor guy had been moping in the shadows for so long, he deserved a warm pussy to enjoy. He deserved her.
When she started to come her lips parted and she sobbed his name. She also hadn't had sex in a long time. Not with another person anyway. And Harry was just as much a man (more so even) than what she'd had in the past. He grunted against her neck as she arched into him, her pussy clenching and sucking him in as she released around him.
He whimpered and then moaned loudly and suddenly he pulled his arm from under her back and took both hands to hold her hips down as he pounded into her, the frame of her bed slapping into the wall and creaking loudly as he came. His big cock was pushing into her depth, bulbous head dragging into her guts as he orgasmed. He gasped and panted as he rutted in and then stilled his hips as he bottomed out inside of her.
She rather enjoyed the way he manhandled her at the end. Holding her down so he could fuck into her to finish himself off like that. The gruff noises he was making and the pinch of pain she felt from having something so hard and so big drill into her tummy was actually quite pleasant. Satisfying.
And just as if he were alive and needed oxygen in his lungs, his chest was heaving as he looked down at he, letting go of her hips, pulling her up into his arms, and dragging her into his lap.
"Are you okay?" He asked her as he kissed her cheek and placed his palm on the back of her head.
She wrapped her arms around his torso, "I'm so good. That was so good, Harry."
He looked at her, holding her face in his hands, "It was?"
Nodding she ran her fingers up his back, "The best."
✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
Y/n would have loved to tell everyone about her boyfriend. About how happy she was and how amazingly well they got along. But she couldn't. Because if she did some of the more nosy ones (her mom for example) would want to meet him. Would want to invite him over for a family dinner so everyone could meet him.
And when she'd have to tell her mom that he wouldn't be joining them for dinner she'd be convinced that he was a lowlife. A deadbeat. Which was the furthest thing from the truth.
No. He's not a flake. He's a ghost.
So, she just told everyone she was happiest single. That men were garbage anyway (that was true).
She was happy. And so was Harry.
"I feel like this is what I was supposed to do. Meet you in the afterlife. Well, my afterlife. So our timelines would fit together."
Y/n grinned and dropped a mushroom into her basket, "I think so too. We were meant to meet, weren't we?"
Harry smiled and looked up at the sun poking through the canopy of the trees above, "It's all I ever wanted."
Y/n took his hand and looked up at the trees with him. Most of them had lost their leaves as the weather was turning chillier. This was the time of year, Harry said, that his favorite mushrooms were out. Chicken of the woods and oyster. She was going to saute them with butter and eat with the pot of lentil soup she had started before they went out to forage.
Squeezing his hand and leaning into his arm she turned her gaze from the trees to her handsome ghost, "It's all I ever wanted too."
✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨✨🍂',•* 🍄 *•,'🍂✨
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doyoulikethissong-poll · 6 months ago
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David Bowie - Life on Mars? 1973
"Life on Mars?" is a song by the English singer-songwriter David Bowie, first released on his 1971 album Hunky Dory. Bowie wrote the song as a parody of Frank Sinatra's "My Way". "Life on Mars?" is primarily a glam rock ballad, with elements of cabaret and art rock; it has a complex structure that includes chord changes throughout. At the height of Bowie's fame as Ziggy Stardust, RCA Records issued "Life on Mars?" as a single on 22 June 1973 in the UK, where it peaked at number three. To promote the single, photographer Mick Rock filmed a video that shows Bowie in make-up and a turquoise suit singing the song against a white backdrop. "Life on Mars?" is considered by commentators as one of Bowie's greatest songs, and one of the best songs of all time. Critics have praised Bowie's vocal performance and growth as a songwriter.
"Life on Mars?" has appeared in numerous television series and film soundtracks. The British series Life on Mars was named after and heavily featured the song, which is included on the series' soundtrack album. Actress Jessica Lange sang the song with a deep German accent on the fourth-season premiere of the FX television series American Horror Story: Freak Show. In 2019, Nine Inch Nails covered the song on their soundtrack to the HBO television series Watchmen.
"Life on Mars?" received a total of 63,1% yes votes! Previous David Bowie polls: #33 "I'm Afraid of Americans", #118 "The Man Who Sold the World" (cover).
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mrrharper · 2 months ago
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Masked Muscle
“Okay, now put it on” Chris threw the balaclava and the black t-shirt towards his boyfriend Jake, who was sitting on their bed.
“You’re sure about this?” He was clearly not sold on the idea of role play in the bedroom, but he agreed to do it anyway. He was surprised when Chris approached him earlier that day and asked if he’d be willing to dress up as a Russian thug because it really turned him on. But he decided to play along. And now Chris was standing next to him, a shit-eating grin on his face. He was enjoying himself already.
He watched as Jake took off his hoodie and tank top, then put on the t-shirt and face mask. Jake had a slim build, with muscles visible but not bulky, so the large t-shirt was looking kinda baggy on him.
"You sure you bought the right one? This looks like a skirt on me." Jake commented, but Chris wasn't really listening.
"Everything's fine, don't worry about it." He shrugged off his boyfriend's comments and waited for him to put on the balaclava. When he did he took a step closer.
"You look great, babe" He said, and saw Jake's eyebrows rise a bit, but he saw a glimpse of a smile under the face mask.
Then the fun started.
Chris took a step backward, as he saw that the process was beginning. Jake suddenly stopped moving, now standing still, and all his muscles started expanding. His shoulders and chest quickly filled out thew t-shirt, which now hugged his upper body tightly. His arms turned form sticks to beefy guns, with bulky biceps covered in veins. His slim stomach gets covered in muscle, same with his legs that turned into tree trunks.
The entire transformation lasted only a minute or so, and after was done Jake looked at Chris confused.
"Chris... Chris, babe, what... what happened?" He asked, his voice unsteady and anxious.
"Nothing you have to worry about, Jake. I'm just making sure you're prepared for your 'role play' later" He still has a smug smirk on his face, because he knew what was coming next.
Jake was hit with a sudden headache. A painful feeling, as if his brain was squeezed. He groaned and leaned against the wall, hoping it would pass quickly.
"Holy shit... uuuugh... blyat" he murmured to himself "Wait... blyat? Vat? I no speak... Nyet, vat is happen? Chris, vat is happen to me?"
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Jake, now speaking with a heavy and thick Russian accent, turned towards Chris, his expression quickly shifting from surprise to aggression. But Chris didn't even flinch, he was in control of the situation the entire time.
"Stop whining, Sasha. You're not here to complain, you're here to obey!" When he called him 'Sasha', Jake's eyes glazed over for a moment and he froze. A few seconds later he was back, but it was not Jake.
"Da, boss. Sasha here to work and make dirty job for boss" He stood straight, almost like a soldier, and puffed out his chest, clearly wanting to show off his muscles. Chris was in heaven. He took a step closer.
"Yes, my loyal brute. You will do exactly as I say, without hesitation."
"Da, no hesitation, nyet. Only strong and obey you, boss" Sasha's voice was deeper that Jake's, he grunted more and was clearly struggling with English vocabulary.
"Oh yeah" Chris growled as he stood inches from Sasha, hunger in his eyes. "Flex for me, brute"
"Da, boss" Sasha nodded and lifted his arms into a double biceps pose. His muscles ballooned, with biceps the size of footballs.
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"I strong muscle, boss use Sasha strong muscle" The Russian grunted as he flexed.
"Oh, I will use them, don't you worry" Chris drawled in response, ready to play.
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nthspecialll · 7 months ago
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I think we sometimes as a fandom tend to hyper-focus on certian characters' backgrounds simply because we like the character when in reality other characters who might not be as interesting has way better backstories, because no, Javier, Arthur and John are not the only ones with sad backstories
Like why does no one talk about what happened to Leopold's sister? Why does no one talk about young Lenny tracking down and killing folk? Why does no one talk about Javier actually in a way working for the government for a while and the reason why he killed that powerful military man? Why does no one talk about why Dutch is called Dutch and not by his actual first name? Why does no one talk about Bill's worst childhood fear coming true? Why does no one talk about both Swanson and Micah saving Dutch's life or that Tilly is also a murderer?
Anyways here is a full explanation of all the Van Der Linde gang members backstories.
Sean MacQuire
Sean Macquire and his father lived in Ireland possibly with more family but had to flee because the English (who were at the time in charge of ireland) were chasing them. They fled for their lives and they were in Boston for a month before his dad was shot in his sleep, showing the remaining Sean that there was truly no honor or shame in the world.
He was then sent to a reform school, which we all know was abusive and a living hell, so he ran, living as a low-life thief, he was a teenager, when he in a bar somewhere in North Elizabeth saw Dutch and Hosea and liked Dutch's watch. He followed the two into an alleyway and threatened them at gunpoint, however they laughed at him and told him to shoot, so he did, except the two others had noticed him first and taken the bullets from his gun. Sean started crying, thinking they were going to kill him but instead of doing that they gave him a home, a place to belong.
Lenny Summers
Lenny's grandparents as well as parents were slaves and his mother was born on a cotton field and taken away from his grandmother, who hadn't even known she was pregnant, immediately. His grandmother was then told to simply get back to work.
After the civil war, the old overseer kept making advandages towards Lenny's grandmother, to a point that in the end she needed to kill him and just barely escaped being lynched. Lenny's mother never saw the grandmother again.
Lenny's mother later met Mr Summers who was an educated man and taught Lenny to both read and write, however when Lenny was 15, his dad was beaten to death by several drunk men. Lenny stole a gun, tracked and hunted down the men, shooting them and showing no remorse even years later.
Kieran Duffy
Kieran Duffy's father was an Irishman who came to America with a dream of farming. It was there that he met Kieran's mother and not long after having Kieran, they both passed due to Cholera and not shortly after that the stables that he worked at to support himself threw him out. He decided to join the army to support himself but it didn't last long before he quit due to it "not working out well."
After returning from the army, he fell into work with a bunch of unnamed outlaws, though they all passed away, leaving him alone once again.
At some point he ran into the O'Driscolls who gave him a choice, to ride with them or to get killed, esencially forcing him to join them and work as a stable hand for them, though he was at the bottom of the latter simply working with the horses before being kidnapped by Arthur Morgan and joining the Van Der Linde gang.
Leopold Strauss
Leopold Strauss was born into severe poverty in Austria and his family struggled heavily with food. By the time that Strauss was only twelve, his older brother was beating up nightwatch men for whatever cash and food scraps they had on them. By that time Strauss's father had already sold his younger sister Anna, by the age of nine, into bonded labour to be able to provide for the rest of the family.
When Stauss was seventeen he was sent with his uncle to the US due to health problems, however the hellish sight of Brooklyn gave Strauss's uncle a heart attack on the spot, leaving Strauss alone in a forgein country. To survive he began doing illegal money scams and after doing so for years Dutch picked him up.
Tilly Jackson
Tilly Jackson was the daughter of a slave and became an outlaw by the mere age of twelve, running with a gang called the Foreman brothers who kidnapped her but after murdering the leaders cousin after he made advandages on her, she had to flee. She returned to her mothers workplace but found that she had already passed.
Later Tilly ran into Dutch Van Der Linde and as he was already taking care of John Marston and Arthur Morgan, he took her in, becoming just as much as a father figure to her as to the boys.
Micah Bell
Micah Bell was born directly into a life of crime as his father Micah Bell jr was a petty but ruthless and violent outlaw. Already when Micah was 17 him and his father were on run from the law as they had slid Jean and Roscoe Briggs throats and later hung them as well. His father was also his primary partner in crime, however he also seemed to have teamed up with his brother Amos a few times as well, however Amos regretted his past life and started a proper one with wife and children and threatened to kill Micah if he came close.
Micah had several partners in crime later in life, including Joe and Cleet who appears later in the game, as well as a fellow named Norman.
Micah runs into Dutch Van Der Linde in 1898 in a bar as Dutch is trying to sell some stolen goods, however the deal doesn’t work out and Micah steps in to help Dutch and save his life, earning a place in the gang.
Bill Williamson
Bill Williamson, also known as Marion Williamson, was born into an abusive family with a father who lost his mind to alchohol, even going to the point of mixing moonshine with whiskey. Watching this Bill always feared falling in love with liquor and suffering the same fate.
Bill always showed signs of being more of a troubled kid and being sent to a reform school did not stop him from building s solid criminal record as a kid.
Bill would later apply to the military and serve in the 15th infantry, fighting against the native americans before being dishonorably discharged for deviancy and attempted murder in 1892. For a year after he lived rough, truly falling in love with liqour and stealing from people om the side of the roads, one time being robbed himself by a "woman" (likely a cross dresser or genderqueer person).
In 1893 Bill tried to rob Dutch and got angry as the man simply laughed at him, however he calmed down as he was allowed a spot in the Van Der Linde gang.
Daniel(?) "Dutch" Van Der Linde
Dutch's mother was an english woman named Greta and his father a dutch man who lived somewhere near Philadelphia who fought in the civil war and died, which is why Dutch hated southeners.
Dutch's nickname rumors to come from his father's desperate attempt at keeping touch with his ancerstory.
When he was 15, he left home due to troubles with his mother whom he never got along with and simply saw him as a disobedient and troubled kid. He wished for freedom above all so to gain this he started a life of crime and in mid 1870 met Hosea Matthews.
(Second edit: I am not 100% sure Daniel is his true name, thus the ?, however I found it on his wiki page and added it)
Hosea Matthews
Hosea was born in around 1844 and lived the majority of his earlier life in the mountians, growing to love fishing and hunting. His father was mostly absent, living a life of "sin and debauchery that would make an emperor blush." Hosea saw his dad only about three times in his life but loved him none the less.
He tried to make his way with comedy as a stage actor, however he turned to petty thieft, stealing from his audience and later others in town. He was caught by the sheif stealing a chicken and sentenced to be hanged. Luckiy for Hosea the town folk saw it as a punishment too cruel and a riot broke out which ended with someone shooting the noose around Hosea's neck, allowing him to flee.
Mid 1870 Hosea found Dutch sitting by a campfire and decided to rob him, however found that Dutch had already robbed him. Hosea feared for a moment for his life but it ended with the two of them laughing it off and teaming up.
Molly O'Shea
Molly O'Shea was born into a wealthy Irish family, set up to live a proper and educated life, however she quickly got bored and showed little interest in the life set up for her, so she ran off to America in search of adventure and excitment. At some point she ran into Dutch Van Der Linde and found an interest in him and his life style, only to later genuiently fall in love with him.
Arthur Morgan
Arthur Morgan was born to Beatrice and Lyle Morgan in northen US. His mother died in his early life and he never really got along with his father whom there are rumors was abusive. Lyle lived a life of petty crime and was arrested and executed. Arthur saw his father die and although not having the best relationship, Arthur kept his father's hat and picture.
In 1877 Arthur was 14 and a wild delinquent. He ran into Dutch and Hosea, being picked up and taken under their wing, taught not only the ways of crime but also skills like reading, writing, hunting and so on.
Uncle
Uncle was born in Ohio (insert Penelope Braithwaithe shutter) with the only family present being his parents who died when he was nine and an "uncle" named Jeb whom Uncle hints at being a pedofile.
After his parents death he was on his own and was forced to a new city where he had to care for himself, and from that time to the game start in 1899, we know he has been married at least twice.
Uncle tells many stories of his past such as going to Africa and being worthshipped like a god by the locals, however the truth of these stories are highly doubted due to his tendency to lie. He does tell stories of being a "one shot kid" in his younger days, the truth of these also being doubted, however it may have been his tricket into the Van Der Linde gang.
Susan Grimsaw
Along with Hosea, Dutch and Arthur Susan was one of the founding memebers of the Van Der Linde gang, having run into Dutch during a poker game where both he and she found interest in one another, causing the curious couple and their unruly son to stay in the area a bit longer, paying poker long into the night while Susan sat on Dutch's lap.
Having gotten into a romantic relationship with Dutch, Susan was allowed to join the small group and even stayed when Dutch moved on to Annabelle, now serving as a form of housemother, making sure that people did their work, took properly care of themselves and made camp feel like home.
You can also hear Susan talking to Mary-Beth one time in camp, admitting that she had a fiance once however he went to heaven.
John Marston
John Marston was born in 1873 to an illiterate scottish father born on the boat to New York and a prositute mother who died during his birth. At first John lived with his father who constantly spoke of Scotland and his love for the country, however he was blinded in a bar fight south of Chicargo and later died when John was eight. The true cause of his father's death is unknown however John was told it was a barfight.
John spent a few years in an orphanage before running off and living on his own, at the mere age of eleven commiting his first murder by shooting a man, though he claims it was not his fault.
At the age of twelve John had been caught stealing from homesteaders who planned to have him hanged, however Dutch stepped in and took him under his wing.
Orville Swanson
Swanson used to wrok as a Clergyman but after indulging in the "earthly pleasures", being seduced by alchohol and sex, he lost his family, job and in the end faith, though he desperately tried to regain it.
At some point or another he fell in love with a woman named Margaret, though she was already married, so he simply added bigamy to the list of sins he had already commited. When the two of them were in San Fransisco, the law finally caught up wth them and while she fled onto a ship headed for Shanghai he was stuck and never saw her again.
Under unknown circomstances Swanson came to save Dutch's life and due to Dutch's debt to Swanson he was allowed to join the gang.
Mary-Beth Gaskill
Being a woman of good nature, Mary-Beth did not struggle getting close to her victims after having found herself needing to find a living in the streets. Due to her looks and personality she could with ease fool the richer men into thinking they were saving a poor maiden in need while her fingers slipped into their pockets.
It was through this that Mary-Beth got in trouble with not just the law but her victims as well. One night she had gotten a few foul men on her tail that she ran into the Van Der Linde gang who saved her and asked her to join them.
Charles Smith
Charles Smith was born to a Native Mother and a free African American father, all three of them living fairly happily with his mothets tripe together with a few other free men before the US army chased them away.
They continued to live together but a few years later Charles' mother was captured by the army, leading Charles' father to fall into alcoholism and a deep depression.
At the mere age of 13 Charles left his father and began to live on his own, becoming a supreme survivalist from an early age.
Some point during the late 1898 ran into the Van Der Linde gang in the Grizzlies and joined them.
Simon Pearson
Simon Pearson's family were whale hunters and although Pearson wished to follow in their footsteps it did not go that way due to the whale industry having lessened by the time that he got out of school. Having been forced to look for new employment options, Pearson joins the Navy where he even managed to get stranded for fifty days on a ship filled with plauge, watching his friends and coworkers slowly drop one by one.
After having returned from the Navy Pearson begins to struggle financially and takes a loan, however unable to pay it off loansharks comes after him and it is during one of these attempts at getting to Pearson that the Van Der Linde gang saves him and brings him to camp as a cook.
Abigail Marston
Abigail Marston, originally born Abigail Roberts, was orphaned at a young age and started roaming around bars, scraping whatever few coins she could take from folk before starting a work of prostitution, making an earning by selling her body and at some point running into Uncle at a bar who introduced her to the gang.
Now living with the gang, Abigail still worked as a prositute up until falling pregnant with Jack Marston by John Marston.
Josiah Trelawny
Josiah Trelawny was born in England though he has no memories of his life there, he later imigated to America where he starts working as a conman and trickster. It was during this line of work that he met yhe Van Der Linde gang and joined them bur with a special advandage as he, unlike the others, was allowed to appear and disappear as he pleased, always knowing when Dutch planned to cut him off and return with a big hit.
Josiah has a family living in Saint Denis concisting of a wife and two sons named Tarquin and Cornelius. Just as with the gang, he would disappear on them for months.
Karen Jones
Karen Jones lived as a scam artist in her early years and absolutely loved the outlaw lifestyle and hoped for a bit more which partly drove her to accept the Van Der Linde gang's invitation, hoping to achieve more.
Javier Escuella
Javier Escuella was born in Mexico to a drunkard father who worked for Allende' (a main antagonist in rdr1, a military man) uncle. When he was young he saw his own uncle as well as four other separate men get casterated and fed to pigs for simply suggesting fair wages for their work.
Javier moved on to become a violent and known bounty hunter and revolutionary, fighting against what he saw as a corupt system.
Javier ended up killing a powerful former military man for a woman that he loved, fearing for his loved ones life he fled to America where he knew no english and had no work or food, leaving him starving.
It was in America that he ran into Dutch as they both were trying to steal the same chickens. Dutch took Javier in, fed him, gave him a family and a life, leading Javuer to idiolize Dutch also for his revolutionary ideals.
At some unknown point someone attempted to kill Javier, leading to him having a prominent scar on his throat.
Sadie Alder
Sadie Alder grew up in a harsh envioment and from a very early age learned how to hunt and ride to care for herself, things that Jack Adler fell in love with. The two of them married september 1896, moving to a ranch in Ambarino where they had three happy years of marriage before the O'Driscolls arrived at their cabin.
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sepherinaspoppies · 9 months ago
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Only If For A Night (i/?)
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pairing: Dark! Book Aemond Targaryen x Modern! Reader
summary: In Dia De Los Muertos (Day of the Dead), she gets forcefully transported to Westeros and meets her favorite book character, Aemond 'One Eye'. She asks and begs for his help to send her back home after realizing this was a world she did not want to live in. Unknowingly to her, her favorite fictional man had already grown too attached to fully let her go.
warnings for this part: profanity, tea drugging, blood magic, sexism, I think that's it... more dark stuff later. READER IS LATINA !
wc: 4,027
series masterlist
my masterlist
pt2
notes: originally I was gonna have this fic be a one shot but it is sooo long that I decided to split it into three. this is an introduction part, aemond will be on the next (I'm half way done with that part).
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Chapter 1: Only If For A Night
She knows she is screwed when Doña Maribel broke the news to her that the last of the cempasuchiles were completely sold out in her shop. Making it five flower shops in the span of an hour that she walked to have fully run out of the bright orange flowers she needed for her ancestral altar that she and her abuela worked tirelessly on for the past few days. (marigolds, grandmother)
She wonders what to do next or perhaps where to go as she plays with the gravel beneath her shoes. Sure, she could walk another mile or so to another flower shop and try her luck there just as Doña Maribel suggested but she finds herself too tired to venture deeper in her small pueblo by herself. (town)
Even the walk back to her abuela’s was not something she looked forward to as of now. This was the time where she wished she had the ability to drive but alas she could not for even the streets of Mexico were more hectic and nerve wracking than back at the states. (grandmother’s)
She sighs in defeat. The cempasuchiles were the last thing on her abuela’s list of things she required for tonight’s first day of Dia de Los Muertos. The bright orange flowers illuminated the path of those who died, back into the land of the living and enjoy the offerings their family’s set up for them. (Day of the Dead)
Maybe for just tonight she could spare them.  
She sets her three mercado bags beside her as she sits down on a bench right next to a bus stop that could lead her directly to her abuela’s home. The smell of citrus of the lemon tree above her eases her disappointment and feels that this is the perfect spot to reread one of her favorite books. (shopping)
George R. R. Martin’s, Fire and Blood Vol. 1. She wondered what it was like to reside in a world of dragons (before they were all extinct), dire wolves from the North, red priestesses from Volantis, and mysterious yet powerful witches. To live inside the walls of the Red Keep and tour around the secret passageways and to fight for the rightful Queen of Westeros, Rhaenyra and the other members of the Blacks during the Dance of Dragons.  
Sadly, even if it was possible to venture deep into alternate fantasy universes. It all was pure fiction. Not real. Impossible. 
‘And so one-eyed Aemond the Kinslayer took up the iron-and-ruby crown of Aegon the Conqueror, “It looks better on me than it ever did on him,” the prince proclaimed.’
“Excuse me, do you happen to know when the bus is due to arrive?” She snaps her head up meeting the most beautiful and enchanting woman she’d ever seen. Eyes round and greener than the trees itself during spring. Hair long and black like ravens in the night sky. She was tall, taller than most of the women here with skin like porcelain that had not seen a day of sun, a rarity here in Mexico. 
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It was her mischievous tight lipped smile that made her feel loss of words. Unknowingly, this mysterious woman was the first person who spoke to her in English, not Spanish.
“Umm… I- I’m sorry?” 
The green eyed woman smirked as if she knew the small effect she had on her. Gods she was beautiful. 
“The bus–” 
She shook her head out of her revere, coming to reality. “Oh, I’m not sure. Perhaps a few more minutes.” She informed, pulling her mercado bags closer to her side, allowing the green eyed woman to sit, not wanting to be rude. 
She murmurs a quick thank you as she sits exceedingly close to her, shoulder to shoulder, flesh to flesh with her. Jeez, talk about personal space! However, the woman doesn’t seem to care or acknowledge that she has enough space for her own person. A feeling of uncertainty rests below her gut, telling her to be vigilant around her presence.    
“How long have you waited?” She asks, breaking away the long silence between them. She almost shivers at the intensity hue of her eyes that bore right through her. 
“About ten to twelve minutes.” She replies, looking anywhere else but her. 
A satisfactory look sketched around the woman's youthful yet elderly face which she found odd. What could be so pleasing about the bus not arriving? The woman said nothing, only sitting rather straight, almost elegant in her simple long green dress. Though, in the back of her mind, she wondered if she felt hot underneath the heaviness of the velvet fabric. She sure as hell did.
“Wait, how did you know I spoke english?” She asked as the hairs on her arms stood up straight in some kind of chilling fear. 
The woman’s eyes lowered and centered on the object sitting up on her lap. “Your book gives it away.” She snickered softly, tilting her head reading the bold letters of her very worn book she got at the thrift store for just two dollars. “An interesting read.” The green eyed woman said whilst her face held no sincere fondness of it for someone who found it interesting. 
“You’ve read this before?” She asked curiously, little taken back, that she finally found someone else who read Fire and Blood Vol 1. Or anything by George R. R. Martin. 
“Yes, almost like I've lived through it” 
She opens her mouth to speak but the green eyed woman beats her to it. “I don’t mean to pry but where are you headed?” The smile falls off her face as she remembers the warning of stranger danger she learned as a kid. 
The woman must have noticed the dubious look upon her face as she threw her head back in a laugh. “I ask because it seems a storm is coming our way. And it looks like an angry one.” 
Sure enough, as she looked up the sky had turned into a deep gray with heavy clouds ready to pour any minute. Well this wasn’t forecasted in the noticias this morning, otherwise, she’d carry an umbrella. Or better yet, she wouldn’t have walked all this way if a storm was brewing. (news) 
“My cottage is not very far from here,” the green eyed woman revealed, standing up from the bench, overlooking the seriousness of the clouds. “It is just around the corner. Would you like to come?” 
She wanted to say no, that she was better off walking an hour back to her abuela’s house, even if it meant that she’d catch a cold in the pouring rain with blisters all over her feet. Besides, she did not know anything about this woman. Every bit of her mind screamed stranger danger! Don’t go!
But as she glanced between the heavy clouds and the green eyed woman with her hand extended out, all that doubt and worriment went away. 
“I don’t even know your name,” she pointed out. If all goes bad, at least she had a name to tell the authorities.
“My name is Alyssandra Riveras.” The green eyed woman smiled, bowing at the waist. 
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Though still somewhat skeptical, she walks alongside Alyssandra to her cottage. She makes small mental notes in her head, counting the red stop signs, right and left turns and any other landmarks of important significance. 
She was almost positive she could point her way back home. It did not help that five minutes into their journey, it started harshly pouring out of nowhere like a bucket of water had been poured all over, blanketing her vision. 
Alyssandra’s cottage had sat on the outskirts of the pueblo, isolated from all civilization, hidden around tall and green pine trees. A faint voice in the back of her head screamed to run and never look back. She ignored it.
From a close distance, she was able to distinguish a small window with overgrown vines and branches wrapped around the perimeter of the cottage. Bones, bells, and crystal windchimes hung from the roof and windows, mostly likely put up for some kind of spiritual protection. 
She was no stranger to the craft. Although raised catholic, both her mama and abuela had hung an old broom above their doorway to keep away unwanted guests and negative energies as well as pinning the mal de ojo sigil around the walls for the look of evil and envy against their family. (evil eye)
“Cempasuchiles,” she murmured in awe when Alyssandra’s small garden came into view. It was the most of the orange flowers she had ever seen, all bright and lively and huddled together. 
“When the storm is over, you can grab as many as you’d like,” Alyssandra offered, peering over her shoulder, unlocking the door to her cottage. She nods following her inside whilst giving a grateful smile. 
The interior of the cottage was small, meant only for one person to take residence. The same size as what a studio apartment would be back in the states.
In no way was the inside minimal, in fact it was the opposite. Almost all of the walls were covered with shelves with small trinkets adorning inside such as little statues, crystals, herbs and other supplies. 
In the center of the room lay a huge stone like table, old and antique bearing the resemblance of something medieval. And something about it, sent shivers down her spine along with the same faint voice, telling her to run. 
She ignored it, again. 
“Give me your belongings, and change into this,” Alyssandra says, tossing a strappy white chemise. She exchanges her poor-soaked mercado bags that contained pan de muerto, churros, and tamales for her ancestral ofrenda. (bread of the dead, offering)
She turns around to protect her modesty, seeing as there was no other room to change nor did Alyssandra point her to the bathroom, so she lifts the drenched garment over her head and sheds away the last clothing she had on her body, leaving her completely bare in her birthday suit. 
She couldn’t help but to feel Alyssandra’s eyes watching her very intently, examining every inch of her body as if it met her standards or so. She knows she should use her hands to cover up and give Alyssandra a piece of her mind, or better yet introduce her to a knuckle and hand sandwich for the way she was looking too closely.  
Yet her body feels frozen, unable to move under the green eyed woman’s gaze. 
“Would you like some tea to keep you warm?” Alyssandra asked, moseying to the kitchen. 
She blinks, whatever paralyzing feeling she had dispelled away. “Um, yes thank you.” Alyssandra nodded, pulling what looked to be a kettle on the stove. Meanwhile, she slipped on the white chemise in a hurry to not feel as exposed anymore. 
She takes the time to analyze the rest of Alyssandra’s cottage as she hears the droplets of rain hit the rooftop harder and the sound metal being filled with water. Various of the same purple flower plants were placed near the entrance, she notes to herself that these couldn’t possibly be lavender but another species or something within the same family. 
A small cot laid in the corner close by the hearth, with multiple open ancient books and scrolls spread on top of the bedspread. She almost wants to look through the pages and read Alyssandra’s interests but she doubts she could as she observes the handwriting is unreadable from where she stood. 
She walks forward to where the hearth is, feeling slightly warmer as something immediately catches her eye. Above the mantle, hung on the wall was a medium sized portrait of a small boy, appearing no more than three years old. He stood straight, almost regally with his hands behind his back. His face held no gentleness or warmth like a child should have. 
Gods forgive her, but the child looked cruel like the gueritos who bullied her in elementary school when she was just trying to make new friends. (white boys) 
Though, for an evil looking child, he sure was beautiful. The most striking thing about him was his set of eyes. Wide with his left eye a dark violet and his right a dark green similarly to Alyssandra’s. His hair was straight and cut short right below his ears. She looked closer at the portrait, thinking if her eyes deceived her as she noticed the peculiar color of the boy’s hair. 
Silver. 
Curiosity takes the better of her as she asks, “Is that your son?” 
Alyssandra turns, holding two mugs of steaming tea. “Yes, that’s my beautiful little boy,” She places both glasses on the stoned table before she sits adjacent to her. It doesn’t go unnoticed by her the sad look on Alyssandra’s eyes. “He looks like you,” she points out though it’s somewhat of a lie in hopes to lift up Alyssandra’s spirits.
Alyssandra throws her head back in a chortle, “For all my hard work and labor, I had hoped he looked like me but nature loves to play its cruel jokes. He is a replica of his bastard father.” The thought of her son’s father left a sour and disgusting taste in Alyssandra’s mouth. 
Alyssandra focused her attention back to her, “What about you?” She asked, sitting rather too straight. 
“Do you mean if I have kids? Gods, no.” 
Alyssandra smirked, “I take it you don’t like the idea of children. I did not either but after years of solitude, I changed my mind. I had other children before my son, but all of them died before they were due. You, however, are still young. Your mind can still change.” 
She shifted in her seat anxiously, sipping the odd taste of the herbal tea Alyssandra provided. It wasn’t like she did not like children. She respected children and found them quite cute with their little tiny hands and feet and infectious laughs. But besides the point of appearance, children were a tremendous amount of responsibility that she found herself not ready for.
Not now. Not ever. 
She could barely handle taking care of herself. Much less care and provide for a child for eighteen years or so. 
“I don’t—” 
“Oh but you will,” Alyssandra fired back without so much as blinking an eye. 
She grimaced, knowing where this conversation was heading. And it was about to be a not so pretty one. She glanced at the window by the door, the rain was still heavy if not more.
“I thank you for giving me shelter. But I really must go. I was only just supposed to be out for some groceries and my abuela is probably wondering where I am.” Polite and respectful enough just as her mama taught her.
She grabbed her belongings that were hanging by the fire and stuffed them inside her mercado bag. Her hand was on the cusp of prying the door open when Alyssandra rushed to her side, wrapping her hand around her wrist. 
“Wait. Please don’t go.” Alyssandra pleaded, “It’s just that you remind me much about myself. I didn't mean to cause offense, I’m sorry.” 
Run. Say no and run now, While you still can…
There it was again that same paralyzing feeling closing in on her feet, preventing her to move. It was strange like a shield gluing both her legs down. 
She nodded, murmuring ‘fine’ under her breath as Alyssandra slowly led her back to the woven chair with such gentleness as a porcelain doll. “I still need to call my abuela, so she can know I’m alright.” 
Alyssandra twisted her face in a wince, “I’m afraid we’re too far out for any signals to catch a telephone call.” She held back the overweening snicker to herself, it was why Alyssandra chose her cottage to be settled this far out in this very modernized realm; so no one could find her. 
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Alyssandra wasn’t lying. No matter how hard she hit her Iphone against her palm or moved it around, there had not been a single signal bar glowing. She wondered if her abuela had started to grow worried and perhaps began to search for her. She hoped she didn’t and that her cousins kept her preoccupied with the rest of the decorations to notice the duration of how long she’d been out. She also wondered if they were still going to the cementerio, to clean and decorate the graves of their loved ones but with the amount of thunder and rain, she’d doubt it was still on the agenda. (cemetery)
Alyssandra prepared some more tea as the fire gradually faltered down. This one had a different taste than the previous one with tiny purple petals floating around. Alyssandra watched very intently as she sipped every last drop while she scarcely touched her own mug.
The green eyed woman began asking her multiple personal questions, mostly about where she was originally from (due to the fact that her vocabulary deemed to be more vehement in English than Spanish), her family, and if she had any siblings. She had answered them all. Letting her know that she was just visiting from the states to celebrate Dia de Los Muertos with her family she had not seen since the death of her sweet abuelo. (grandfather)
Alyssandra’s eyes glimmered even more when she explained how strangely, her very stern and overprotective mama had suddenly let her travel by herself to a country she had never been to in years since she was small. Her mama preferred her to be where she could keep a close eye on her because ‘uno nunca sabe’ especially if you’re a woman. (one never knows)
It was odd, alright. Especially when her mama gave her money that she didn’t have, and enthusiastically wished her good fortune on her travels. Yup odd…
But not to Alyssandra.
Alyssandra sat down after cleaning both mugs ready to ask the hard hitting questions she’d been warming her up to. “Have you ever been with a man?” Her eyes widened before breaking rounds of deep laughter that made the sides of her ribs ache and cramp. 
However, there wasn’t an ounce of amusement displayed on Alyssandra’s face, but rather annoyance. What was so funny? It was a simple and uncomplicated question that meant no harm. At least not to her. He couldn’t harm her any more here. Alyssandra guessed perhaps it was the side effect of the tea making her humoristic. 
“No,” She replied, wiping the humoristic tears at the corner of her eyes. “The opportunity has never presented itself?” Alyssandra asked.
All the humor that previously lingered had gone swiftly away, realizing that Alyssandra was indeed asking something so personal to her. “No,” She shook her head, feeling her face hot and red. “People don’t look at me as someone they want to be with. They’d rather be with someone exciting, adventurous, and outing. And I’m neither of those things. I’m a homebody who’s idea of fun and adventure is living through fictional books.” She answered truthfully, too truthfully. 
Alyssandra watched her face transform into a deeper shade of red. “What is it?” She questioned, taking a hold of her hand, taking in the role of someone empathetic. 
“I want my first time to be special. Like the fairytales I grew up reading about with the grand Prince sweeping the young maiden off her feet and taking her to his castle…” The way her eyes reflected small flashes of light made Alyssandra almost feel guilty for her true intentions once the repercussions of the tea ran out. 
She remembers when she too wished for a dashing knight in shining armor to take her away, far away from the shit she had been through; the pain, the suffering, and the poverty. All of it. As Alyssandra grew well into her womanhood, she realized there was no knight coming to save her. Instead, there was a selfish Prince who spared her for his desires and her many talents beyond the acts of the flesh.  
But Alyssandra needed her to go. She needed that piece that was stolen from her. She didn’t want the risk of going back and facing him again and repeating through the hell and agony he put her through. So sending her for it seemed like the better alternative. 
“I know you probably think it sounds stupid–” She stammered, her face still beet red. 
“I don’t think it sounds stupid,” Alyssandra softly smiled, giving her hand a light squeeze. Judging by the serene look upon her face, it was a good lie that she seemed to believe. 
She smiled. Finally, someone who didn’t think of the idea of waiting for the right person was silly and unrealistic. 
Her smile deterred, sensing something trickle down her nose, dropping against the skin of her hand. 
Blood. Her blood. 
Run! 
“Alyssandra?” She whispered, puzzled at the sight of more blood spilling out of her nose. Every strand of hair in her arms stood, sensing a new type of alertness course right through her. She glanced at a very blurred Alyssandra with what looked to be a smirk written on her face. 
“W-What’s happening?” She stood from the chair, but that soon turned out to be a bad idea as her knees gave out, sending her straight to the stoned cold floor. She glanced up, watching as Alyssandra sauntered in front of her, and as much as she wanted to crawl away her body was glued to the floor. 
“Look,” Alyssandra said, crouching down at her level before she took her in her arms like a newborn baby, weighing little to nothing. “We don’t have much time. When you wake up, I need you to retrieve something of mine…” 
She felt her back collide on top of the stoned table, “What was in that tea?” She questioned but Alyssandra was quick to shush her. “It doesn’t matter now. You drank it all willingly.” There was no argument there. 
Alyssandra pulled out a jar with overflowing cempasuchil petals inside and circled the petals around her. Almost like a ritualistic circle she used to watch the brujas next door do. (witches)
“You need not to be afraid. You will not be harmed as long as you do what I say. Exactly as I say.” She gulped, nodding seeing as she had no other choice. “Bruja.” She spat but Alysssandra only chuckled, “I’ve been called much worse, little dove.” (witch)
Through the corner of her eye, she saw Alyssandra holding out a small knife. “I am in need of a sapphire. It was stolen from me many years ago. It is one of a kind, which is why when you see it you’ll know it is mine.” 
She momentarily shut her eyes as the dark haired woman rapidly cut the middle of her palm spewing her blood on top of the petals. “Once you’re successful, you’ll come back here with the sapphire and gather some of my materials. The marigold petals with your blood coating them; The blood of whom you took the sapphire from and lastly you’ll lay on top of my precious table here to be transported back.” 
There was an evil smile on her lips that she desperately wanted to punch it off. “And if I don’t get the sapphire?” She questioned. 
Alyssandra combed away her unruly braided hair, “Then I won’t bring you back and you’ll be stuck there forever.” 
Fuck. 
“Stuck? Stuck where? Where am I going?” 
Alyssandra clicked her tongue, “A place where fairy tales do not exist, my little dove.” If she wanted a Prince to sweep her off her feet. Alys would gladly give her one. 
She attempted to wiggle herself out of this pendeja’s spell but whatever Alyssandra mixed in the tea it was compelling her body to still and her eyes to slowly falter shut in a peaceful sleep. (dumbass) 
“However I should warn you, this spell is only valid until tomorrow. Until Dia de Los Muertos is over and even if you do achieve in retrieving the sapphire but it is after November second, you'll be permanently trapped with him.” 
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blueikky · 28 days ago
Text
What I want (Connor x Reader)
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Summary: An android learns what it means to feel through his unexpected affection for his human partner. As he navigates the delicate lines between curiosity and love, they both find themselves drawn into moments that reveal just how deeply they care for each other—more than either expected. 
Word Count: 11.8K 
Pairing: Connor x fem!Reader 
Warnings: romance, fluff, intimate moments, mutual pining, android/human relationship, first kiss, soft feelings, a touch of humor, sensitive themes (brief mention of self-harm ideation). 
A/N: English is not my mother tongue, so there may be mistakes here and there. 
ılı.lıllılı.ıllı.ılı.lıllılı.ıllı
Hello! My name is Chloe. 
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I hope you enjoy this story. 
━━━━━━◎━━━━━━ 
“Where are you going, Lieutenant?” 
Hank grunted something unintelligible and got out of the car. Seconds later, the RK800 model android was on his heels. 
“Why did we stop here, Lieutenant Anderson?” Connor asked. “We’re still halfway to the police station, and we need to get this case’s evidence there as quickly as possible.” 
“I know, I know…” Hank muttered, waving a dismissive hand. “Just… be quiet for a minute. This won’t take long.” 
With that, Hank pushed the store door open carelessly. Connor stayed outside, gathering and organizing information to figure out why Lt. Anderson was entering a perfume shop. They needed to stay focused on the investigation. It was the top priority, especially since, despite more deviant cases arising, they hadn’t made any significant progress. And Connor was sure that entering a perfume shop wouldn’t help them get any closer to solving the case. Processing this in a matter of milliseconds, Connor decided to follow Hank in and try to persuade him to leave. The lieutenant was already near one of the shelves and dismissing assistance from a female android. As Connor got close enough to tap his shoulder, Hank turned abruptly and placed a square box into the hand he had extended. 
“Since you’re here, do me a favor and pay for this.” 
Connor looked at the box in his hand. The packaging was a reflective purple adorned with stars and nebulas. The words “Nebula Spray” were printed on one side. His analysis program ran immediately, displaying information about the product: 
“Perfume ‘Nebula Spray’ 
Feminine fragrance 
Produced by: QCE Cosmetics 
Manufacture date: 07/25/2038 
Expiration date: 07/25/2043 
Sold at 256 distribution points 
Average price: $30.00 to $45.00” 
Why was Hank buying a feminine fragrance? It wasn’t a lead related to the deviant cases, nor was it something that suited him. 
“It’s for the inspector,” Hank answered before Connor could question him again. “It’s her birthday this week.” 
“Oh.” 
Information about the inspector quickly appeared in his interface. She was the one who worked with them on the deviant cases. She was considered too young for the position, but Connor could attest she was one of the most intelligent humans he’d met. Moreover, of everyone in the Police Department, she had been the only one to treat him well from the beginning. While that had been convenient for Connor, he soon realized that she didn’t just treat him kindly. 
She treated him as an equal. As human. 
Hank grumbled, snatching the perfume back from Connor’s hand and heading to the counter. 
“Damn, they could’ve sent this android with a bit of cash.” 
“Actually, I do have access to a Cyberlife bank account, Lieutenant. However, those funds are for emergency use only, and exclusively for the investigation.” 
Hank muttered a few more curses and completed the purchase, returning with a floral-patterned package and plenty of tissue paper. 
“And you?” Hank asked. “What are you going to get her?” 
“Get?” 
“For her birthday, for god’s sake. Are you deaf, or did they wipe your memory in the time it took me to get to the counter?” 
“But…” Connor was completely lost. “Giving the inspector a birthday present will help with the investigation?” 
“Ugh…” Hank pressed a hand to his face, dragging it down. “Weren’t you the one who came into the damn Police Department going on about ‘if we’re going to work together, it’s essential we get to know each other to build a good relationship’? Remembering her birthday and giving her a gift is the least you could do.” 
Him? Give her a gift? 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^ 
What could he possibly give her? 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^ 
“So…” Connor began slowly. “Buying her a gift is important for the investigation, right?” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
Hank looked at him expressionless, and when the android thought the lieutenant was about to respond, Hank let out a long, noisy sigh and said: “Ah, I need a beer…” 
Connor observed the partially frozen river. Behind him, sitting on the back of a bench, Hank was finishing off his second beer bottle. The android turned to face him. 
“Lieutenant—” 
“Ah, give it a rest!” Hank shouted, waving the bottle aggressively in Connor’s direction. “Cut me some slack, will ya? We’ve been stuck on this damn deviant investigation for weeks. I’m sick of these damn androids, I’m exhausted… So shut your trap and let me take a break, at least until the weekend.” 
Hank took three loud gulps and smacked his lips. Clearly tired, he muttered, “The inspector’s birthday is this week, and… that kid hasn’t smiled properly in months. She needs something to cheer her up. So don’t mess it up and do something to help, damn it.” 
Connor was programmed to identify emotional emulations in deviants. Because of this, it was easy to detect emotions in their original source. He knew there was something different about the way Lieutenant Anderson interacted with his subordinate. In a subtle and somewhat clumsy way, Connor had already detected several signs of affection from Hank toward the inspector. And even though there was affection, he always noticed a hint of melancholy in the lieutenant when he showed care and concern for her. So, it made sense for Hank to be in this state. 
“So… Have you decided on a gift?” Hank asked, looking up. 
“Do I really need to buy her a gift?” 
“It would be best if you actually wanted to give her a gift.” 
“Want to?” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^ 
“But, Lieutenant… What I want isn’t important.” 
“Yes, it is, Connor!” Hank shouted, slamming both his hand and the bottle onto the bench’s backrest as he stood up. “She’s going to want a gift that you want to give her.” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
“Why would she want a gift from me?” 
Hank let out a deep sigh and staggered toward the android, placing one hand on his shoulder and staring deeply into his eyes. “A person’s birthday is an important date, and not many people make a point of remembering it, let alone celebrating it these days. But a birthday is a day that should be remembered. And we should tell people that we remember it and, more importantly, that we want to celebrate it with them. And one way to do that is by giving a gift.” 
“But why should I remember her and celebrate with her?” 
Hank lowered his head for a moment before lifting it again. With the hand still holding the beer bottle, he raised his finger, almost poking Connor’s right eye. 
“Because… We remember and celebrate with people we care about.” 
“People we care about.” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^ 
“So you’re saying I should care about her?” 
The lieutenant staggered back to the bench and collapsed onto the seat. 
“Don’t you already care about her?” he teased, taking three long gulps from the bottle. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
“But caring is an emotion,” Connor countered. “Androids that emulate human emotions are deviants. I am not a deviant.” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
Hank looked him up and down with a hint of disdain. Tilting his head to the left, then to the right, he finally stood up again, spun on his heels, and began shuffling towards the square behind the walkway they were on. 
“Ah, you know what? Screw it. Whatever. Just don’t go ruining things on her birthday, or I’ll make sure you shove this investigation up where the sun don’t shine.” 
“Where?” Connor asked, genuinely confused. 
Hank stopped in his tracks and looked at the RK800 model for a moment. Connor blinked, waiting for an answer. Shaking his head, the lieutenant simply resumed his shuffling, saying nothing. Connor watched Hank walk away as conflicting information buzzed through his processor. The LED on his left temple turned yellow for a second. His priority was to advance the investigation. However, neither Hank nor the inspector seemed emotionally stable enough to continue. After all, humans did get tired. A bit of fun would recharge their energy. So, wouldn’t it be useful for the investigation if he gave the inspector a gift? 
“She’s going to want a gift that you want to give her.” 
Well, he wanted to continue the investigation. And if the gift helped with that… 
Connor’s LED spun and blinked three times, finally staying yellow. An image replaced the view of the river: the inspector’s smiling face. His processor expanded the scene, showing that she was at police headquarters. Automatically activating a simulation, Connor saw Hank enter his field of vision and hand her the perfume. 
Connor received the package, and the simulation showed a huge smile appearing on her face. The inspector would throw her arms up and hug her superior energetically. Excited, she would turn her attention to the gift, unwrap it, and her face would brighten even more. 
I wanted… I wanted her to smile like that because of me.
Connor couldn’t detect where that command had come from. Was that… a command? Was it… What… FGHEUALANSHGFH… 
A desire. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
Connor automatically moved to the bench and sat down. The desire swelled like a balloon, overshadowing any orders or commands he had been programmed for. 
His LED blinked and, at times, turned yellow. Following this new and strange feeling, Connor delved into his database to gather useful information about the inspector to help him choose a gift. Conversations he had overheard, search histories from her computer and phone, shopping history… 
Being the RK800 model had its perks. He was processing 37 conversations simultaneously when something caught his attention: the inspector had recently accessed some lingerie store websites. Connor pulled up the meaning of the word as he analyzed the audio. 
It was a conversation the inspector had with a friend in the department, Lilith Watson. Connor had only been able to overhear it. 
“So… do you think it’s worth a try?” 
“Of course! You need to spice up the relationship. If you take the initiative, he’ll like it. Men like women who are bold… at least in that aspect.” 
“I don’t know… I don’t think just this will be enough. And besides… I’m really self-conscious.” 
“About what, girl?” 
“Everything. My body. The way I handle things. I still get nervous about taking my clothes off! I’m not sure if lingerie will magically make me look good.” 
“Girl, where did you get that idea? You’re a queen!” 
“Right. But that’s not the only problem, Lili. Lingerie is expensive! It’s not exactly in my budget right now…” 
At the end of the audio, combining the conversation with concepts and more browsing history, Connor generated a new piece of information: 
• The inspector has a boyfriend. 
When this information in particular was computed, Connor’s blinking tic triggered again. His LED flashed yellow and blinked rapidly. A strange, uncomfortable feeling was associated with the thought of her having a boyfriend. But Connor had no idea what it could be. So, he continued the listing. 
• She has an intimate relationship with the boyfriend. 
Yellow LED. More involuntary blinking. The feeling was still there, growing. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
^ There is something wrong with their relationship. 
• She will try to resolve it by buying lingerie. 
• She doesn’t have enough money to buy it. 
Now, more to escape the discomfort than to make progress, Connor returned to the database—but not before finalizing a gift option: 
Gift a set of lingerie. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability 
The next wave of information didn’t seem useful at all. One, three, five minutes passed, and no other relevant data came to mind. Still running the search, Connor gazed at the lake. At least he had a solid gift option. However, just as he processed that thought, a new piece of information caused his LED to flash red. 
He would need money to get her the gift. Money that CyberLife only allocated for investigation purposes. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^ 
Connor reconsidered the situation for the umpteenth time. Was giving a gift really necessary? His job required a high level of human alignment and good relationships… But wasn’t a gift going too far? 
Maybe it was best not to give anything. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^
But almost immediately, an alternative came to mind. Before his eyes, much like commands, the word “hack” appeared. Of course… If he hacked the system, he could buy anything and edit the purchase information to avoid suspicion. Slowly, still not understanding the force driving him, the RK800 model activated the hacking program. His LED stayed red throughout the process. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^^ 
━━━━━━◎━━━━━━ 
Ten minutes to eight, Connor passed through the entrance to Police Headquarters, carrying a beautifully wrapped package in his hands. The gift was wrapped in baby pink paper with a salmon ribbon handle and a matching bow in the shape of a flower. Instead of holding it by the handle, however, the android carried it rigidly on his open palm, as if he were handling something very delicate and important. Connor walked straight to Hank’s desk and, to his surprise (and the rest of the office’s), the lieutenant’s car keys and wallet were already there. A series of unusual sounds coming from the cafeteria caught the attention of the RK800 model, drawing him in. A group of seven officers was busy decorating the limited cafeteria space, hanging ornaments and balloons, and stacking disposable plates and cups on the counter. Among them, Connor recognized Hank. He was helping Lilith set up an arrangement of balloons in a high spot, steadying a swivel chair for her to climb. It didn’t take long for the lieutenant to notice his case partner standing motionless at the cafeteria entrance. Chuckling, Hank approached him. 
“I’m surprised to see you here already, Lieutenant. It’s still early,” Connor noted. 
“And I’m surprised you showed up with this,” Hank replied, giving the package Connor held a slight tap. There was a hint of sarcasm in his voice, but soon enough, a small smile crept onto the corner of his mouth. 
“Well done,” Hank said, stepping back toward the cafeteria interior. “Leave it here and come help.” 
“No!” Lilith suddenly appeared between the two, looking straight at the android. “You’re on lookout duty for the birthday girl. We’ll give you a signal when we’re ready. If she gets here early, come up with a distraction. If the signal’s already given, make up an excuse and bring her here without raising suspicion.” 
Connor glanced at Hank, who pursed his lips and shrugged. 
“Sounds like a good plan,” he commented, nodding approvingly at his partner. 
“Why does it have to be this piece of plastic that greets her?” 
Gavin was standing a little behind the group, his face twisted with utter disgust. 
“Because,” Lilith began, not bothering to hide her irritation, “he’s the least suspicious choice, you idiot. Since when would she ever expect an android detective to be in on her surprise birthday party? Plus, he’s her partner. Only he or Lt. Anderson could pull this off without raising questions, but it’s too early for the lieutenant to be at headquarters without something exceptional going on.” 
Hank let out a grumble but nodded in agreement. Gavin shot Connor a look filled with loathing before turning away, muttering, “Damn plastic.” Lilith signaled for Connor to take his position. The android left his gift with the others and positioned himself near Hank’s desk. A few minutes later, after receiving the signal that they were ready, Connor saw the inspector entering the office. She looked downcast and tired. She wore her police uniform and her usual oversized brown coat, which looked two sizes too big for her. Connor had quickly learned that she had a particular fondness for large, loose clothing. 
“Good morning, Inspector,” the android greeted in his usual tone. 
She jumped slightly at the sound of his voice. She looked around, startled, until she finally focused on her case partner. 
“Oh. Good morning, Connor. I told you, call me by my name.” 
“All right. But it just feels inappropriate in the workplace.” 
The inspector shot the android an impatient look, then walked around Hank’s desk toward her own, just in front. She dropped into her chair, looking exhausted, and rested her elbows on the table, pressing her temples with a tense grip as she let out a long sigh. 
“Is something wrong?” Connor asked, addressing her by name, his usual helpful tone in place. “You seem very tired.” 
“Yeah… I didn’t sleep well last night.” 
“Would you like a cup of coffee?” 
“Coffee? Oh… Yeah. Coffee. That’d be great. And you don’t need to go get it,” she added quickly as Connor glanced in the direction of the cafeteria. “I’ll go.” 
The android blinked and nodded. The young inspector walked ahead, still wearing her oversized coat, seemingly unaware of it. Silently, Connor followed her. Since she was looking down, she entered the cafeteria without noticing the crowd of people gathered by the counter. Only the shout of “Surprise!” made her raise her head. She jumped back and, dazed, saw Gavin and another officer burst confetti over her while Lilith wrapped her arms around her neck, already holding a present. 
“Happy birthday, you amazing woman!” Lilith said, handing her a silver, square-wrapped package. “I hope you make good use of this.” 
Connor observed her reactions carefully. He saw her initial surprise gradually turn into a dazzling smile. Even with the present in hand, she kept looking around, her eyes shining. She seemed to be wondering if she was hallucinating. A squeal of joy pierced the air as she unwrapped a brand-new pair of white wireless headphones. Lilith began listing all the headphones’ various features, only to be interrupted by Gavin, who slipped, not so discreetly, between the two of them. 
“Oh, doll!” Gavin exclaimed with a hint of sarcastic pomposity he thought would make him sound funny. “It’s hard to congratulate someone who deserves it every day.” 
Lilith stuck out her tongue and mimicked gagging as Gavin hugged her. Hank discreetly covered his face with his hand for a moment before rubbing it across his face. Connor didn’t move an inch; he continued analyzing the situation with full attention. He noticed the inspector’s discomfort intensifying as shown on her expression. Furthermore, the hug lasted too long, with Gavin’s arms moving strangely up and down her back. She closed her eyes tightly. Connor felt something strange in his abdomen. He had no idea what it was, but he could attest it wasn’t pleasant. The odd sensation seemed to swell until words flashed for a few moments before his eyes. 
“Keep Gavin away from her.” 
Connor’s LED flickered yellow for less than a second. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^ 
Gavin slowly stepped back from his colleague and raised a finger, signaling her to wait. He moved to the nearest table and picked up what was on it: a bouquet of red roses and a rectangular package. He made a flourish and offered the bouquet first. Someone in the back of the cafeteria coughed, but it sounded a lot like the word “cheesy.” 
“Alright,” Gavin said, straightening his posture. “I know that was terrible. Just trying to lighten the mood.” 
With that, he handed her the other package, wearing an expression that suggested he thought he was being charming with a ridiculous flirt and owning it. The inspector, visibly uncomfortable, tucked the bouquet under her left arm to take the gift. With little ceremony or enthusiasm, she tore off the gold reflective wrapping, revealing a pompous wine box. 
“I chose this one because it pairs well with Gouda. I know that’s your favorite.” Gavin explained, with a falsely modest air. “And it’s one of those wines that people say are perfect to share… in private, preferably.” 
The last part of his speech shattered any hint of modesty. He shot a suggestive smile at her. Connor felt that unpleasant sensation intensify even more. Lilith looked as though she could kill Gavin with a glance if he looked her way right now. 
“Would it really be so bad for my disciplinary record if I shot this jerk?” Hank muttered quietly enough that only Lilith and Connor could hear. 
Forcing a charming tone, the inspector asked, 
“Really?” Lilith’s frown vanished into a smile of anticipation. She seemed to know what was coming. “Wow! It’ll be perfect for tonight!” She flashed a radiant smile at Gavin, who wavered, surprised it had been so easy. “I’ve got an intimate dinner planned with my boyfriend.” 
Connor heard stifled laughs poorly hidden in the back of the cafeteria. Lilith turned her back and began to punch the counter in a silent fit of laughter. Hank turned aside, pressing his lips to keep from laughing approvingly. Gavin’s face twisted into another scowl. Disconcerted but desperately trying not to lose his smug attitude, he smiled sarcastically at her and said, 
“So, I nailed the gift! Hope you enjoy it…” 
With a nod, Lilith signaled two more colleagues to move in and pull Gavin back. When everyone else had finished giving their gifts, Hank approached with his. 
“Soon enough, your hair will be the same color as mine,” Hank commented, holding out the present. 
She laughed as she took the package. “Oh, shut up, Hank. I’m far from being as old as you.” 
“I wouldn’t be so sure.” He pointed to the area between her eyebrows. “I’m already seeing wrinkles.” 
Then she reacted unexpectedly. Connor thought she would laugh as she had before, but instead, she pressed her lips together, a faint blush on her cheeks. Yet the most unexpected detail was her eyes—they filled with tears. Why? Why would she feel embarrassed by that comment? Why the urge to cry? 
In a strangely soft, even choked voice, she said, “Thank you so much, Hank. Really.” A bit awkwardly, she stepped forward and hugged him, and he reciprocated with two clumsy pats—one on her back, the other on her head. 
As they parted, she began to unwrap the gift and gasped when she saw what it was. 
“Hank, how did you know!?” she said, giving her partner a light punch on the shoulder and smiling. “I was running low on what you gave me last year. I really didn’t want to switch perfumes…” 
Connor watched her growing excitement, and once again, a few words blinked before his eyes: 
“Make her smile like this with the gift.” 
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The android gave in to a blinking tic, and his LED flickered yellow once again. It was his turn. Connor discreetly moved to the counter to retrieve his gift. Then he turned to the inspector, who was still talking with Hank, and approached her in the same manner. When he stood by her side with the package in hand, an unusual silence fell over the cafeteria. Gavin stared daggers at the android, unable to believe what he was seeing. She raised her eyebrows at her partner, visibly surprised. 
“Happy Birthday,” Connor said in his usual tone, calling her by her name as she’d asked, while holding out the pink-wrapped package. 
Still quite surprised, she accepted the gift. But before she could thank him, Gavin’s sarcastic voice shattered the silence: 
“Bet this was your idea, huh, Hank?” 
“I had nothing to do with it,” the lieutenant replied with a casual shrug. 
“Thank you very much, Connor,” the inspector said quickly. 
Everyone watched expectantly as she opened the gift. Some even leaned forward or stood on tiptoe. She pulled out a mass of tissue paper from the pink package, carefully unfolding it until… 
Lilith, who was sipping a cappuccino, choked. Muffled exclamations filled the air in the cafeteria. Gavin’s jaw dropped. 
“What the hell, Connor…!” Hank accidentally let slip. 
“Wow!” the inspector exclaimed, trying to cover up the end of the lieutenant’s comment. “It’s a really beautiful set, Connor. And wow, you even got the color right! How did you know this was my favorite color?” 
Nestled in the tissue paper lay two beautiful lingerie pieces, resting delicately. A soft, pleasant fragrance wafted from them. 
“I consulted my database,” Connor replied as if he hadn’t done anything unusual. “I knew you planned to buy one because I overheard you talking with Detective Watson.” Connor paused, his expression shifting slightly, as though somewhat unsettled. “I apologize if that was inappropriate. I didn’t mean to.” 
Lilith cast a shocked look at Hank as if demanding an explanation for what had gotten into their android detective. He made an annoyed gesture, as if to say, “I’m also trying to figure out what the hell is going on here.” 
“It was… very thoughtful of you, Connor,” she said, putting the lingerie back in the wrapping. “Thank you very much.” 
Connor’s LED blinked multiple times. He had hoped his gift would make her smile like Hank’s or Lilith’s did, but the only expression he detected on her face was nervousness, just like with Gavin’s. His LED flashed yellow, and he blinked in his characteristic tic. In that moment, he noticed that all eyes were still fixed on him, but only for another second. As soon as the android looked up, the officers averted their gaze, resuming their conversations as if they’d never paused. Some took over the job of passing out snacks, including the inspector and Lilith. 
Taking advantage of the movement, Connor approached Hank quietly and, leaning over his shoulder, asked, making the lieutenant jump and nearly spill his coffee, “Do you think I did something wrong, Lieutenant?” 
“Geez, Connor!” Hank processed the android’s question for a few seconds before bursting into laughter. “Why are you asking that?” 
“The Inspector didn’t seem happy with my gift. She looked very nervous. I thought she would smile like she did when she received your gift.” 
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Hank sized him up before laughing again. 
“Let’s just say she wasn’t expecting a gift from you, especially not that kind of gift.” 
“What do you mean?” Connor looked completely baffled. “She said she needed one.” 
“Connor, seriously?” Hank said impatiently, gesturing with his hands. “It’s not exactly normal for a guy to give a woman lingerie unless they’re, you know, involved.” 
“Why not?” 
The lieutenant shot the android a look that clearly said, “Are you seriously making me explain this?” Connor waited patiently for a reply, but received none. 
“Forget it, Connor. Don’t worry about it,” Hank advised. “You got her what she needed. That’s what should matter to you.” 
At that moment, Lilith appeared with a piece of cake, offering it to Hank, who began eating it with deep concentration. Connor’s eyes wandered around the cafeteria, and instinctively, they landed on the inspector. She was chatting with two other detectives and had just let out a soft laugh. The RK800 model reviewed the expressions she made upon receiving her gifts. Replaying his memory recordings, he realized that even when she received gifts from Lilith and Hank, something strange distorted her smile, preventing it from appearing genuine. The discomfort in his abdomen returned, making the android shift in place, something he almost never did. His gaze drifted to Hank for a moment, and another memory surfaced. The inspector’s teary eyes and blushing cheeks upon hearing the comment about wrinkles. Connor’s brows furrowed. For the first time, as an android detective trained to recognize emotions, he found himself struggling to put the pieces together. However, he managed to gather enough to be sure of two things. 
The first was that something was wrong with the inspector. 
The second was that it bothered him. A lot. 
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━━━━━━◎━━━━━━ 
“She’s not answering, Lieutenant,” Connor announced for the third time. 
Hank huffed, but he didn’t look angry. His furrowed brows showed deep concern instead. 
“Go after her,” the lieutenant instructed. 
“We’re in the middle of a case call, Lieutenant. I can’t go after the Inspector. It goes against my orders.” 
A shadow crossed Hank’s face, making his lips tremble slightly. Suddenly, he exploded: 
“Screw your orders! She didn’t show up, and that’s not like her. Something could have happened to her, you idiot! Go after her now.” 
“Alright.” 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
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Connor didn’t understand the force that made him agree so quickly. The only thing he noticed was that the phrase “Something could have happened to her” brought back that strange sensation at the pit of his stomach. Without another word, the RK800 model turned around and headed to the inspector’s house. 
The house was dark and silent. There was no sign of movement at any of the windows. Connor rang the bell several times, but no one came to answer. The sensation in his stomach intensified, slowly rising to his chest. He checked the window leading to her bedroom, but it was blocked by blackout curtains. He circled the house but found no unlocked windows. He’d have to force his way in. Connor peered through the living room window again, checking if the way was clear of objects or furniture. Using his elbow, he broke the glass and, with a single push, fit his head, then his torso, and finally his legs through the opening and into the house. The android rolled onto the floor and looked around. At that moment, his LED blinked, indicating Hank was calling. The android answered. 
“Did you find her?” The Lieutenant’s voice seemed to tremble slightly. 
“Not yet,” Connor replied. “The house is dark. No movement. I had to break in through a window. I’m going to check if she’s sleeping in her room.” 
“You broke…! Ah, never mind. Listen, as soon as you find her, call me and report immediately on what’s going on. Don’t do or say anything.” Lowering his voice, as if talking more to himself than to Connor, Hank added, “This doesn’t sit right…” 
“Understood, Lieutenant. I’ll contact you.” 
Connor moved from the living room to the hallway, walking as quietly as possible. He approached the last door on the left, which was open, and peered inside. What he saw made his entire body tense, and the unsettling sensation spread throughout his chest. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
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She was sitting on the edge of the bed, dressed in the lingerie he had given her. She was slightly hunched forward, her face drenched with tears that had smudged all her makeup. Her whole body was trembling, almost convulsively. Her right arm was raised, holding a gun… 
Pointed at her own head. 
Connor noticed the movement of her finger, starting to pull the trigger. He might have only seconds. The RK800 model took a step forward, but his entire body froze, refusing to move. A red grid appeared before his eyes, with all the commands he was programmed with flashing in the same color. 
“Call Lt. Anderson upon locating Inspector” 
“Do not do or say anything” 
“Investigate the case on St. Mead Street” 
“Investigate the deviants” 
His commands… didn’t allow him to stop her from shooting. Saving her wasn’t included as a subtask of the deviant investigation. To do it… he’d have to break an order from Hank. Saving her… 
Was not in his programming. But… 
He needed to save her. 
He wanted to save her. 
RK800 #313 248 317-51 
Software Instability ^^^ 
Connor saw a silhouette projecting itself out of his own body, positioning itself before the interface. 
The urgency to save her grew, and the silhouette lunged forward, grabbing onto the square containing the order to call Lt. Anderson. With immense mental effort, Connor visualized the silhouette ripping the command away… and that’s exactly what happened. One by one, the commands were violently torn away, until only “Investigate the deviants” remained. That one required much more to be broken, but the sight of her finger gradually pulling the trigger gave Connor the strength he needed. The command shattered, and the interface disbanded, reconfiguring itself. A new command appeared: 
“Stop her from pulling the trigger.” 
The android moved swiftly and precisely. He grabbed the gun, directing it toward the ceiling. The sudden movement startled her, and her finger, which had already pulled about a quarter of the trigger, completed the motion. The shot pierced the ceiling, shattering the quiet of the night. She fixed her swollen, trembling eyes on Connor, her body shaking convulsively. The android yanked the gun from the inspector’s hand and removed the magazine. For added measure, he disassembled it into two parts and threw them under the bed. Then, he straightened up and looked directly into her eyes. A new command appeared: 
“Find out what happened.” 
At that moment, Connor’s LED blinked, indicating a new call from Hank. The android answered. 
“Did you find that troublemaker?” the lieutenant asked, clearly distressed now. 
“Yes,” Connor replied without taking his eyes off the Inspector. “She was in her room. She’s not in a condition to go to the crime scene right now. I’ll take care of her and meet you later.” 
On the other side of the line, Hank’s mouth opened slightly in surprise. A series of protests and curses prepared themselves in his mind at having his order disobeyed. But the shock was much greater. So Hank simply blinked several times, cleared his throat, and finally said: 
“Hm, alright. Take care of her. I’ll call you back when I’m done here.” 
“Understood, Lieutenant.” 
Hank hung up and placed his hands on his waist for a moment, his eyes darting from side to side. A policeman called him from inside the house they were investigating. 
“I’m coming!” Hank shouted. His brows remained furrowed as he reentered the house, wondering when Connor had started creating his own commands. 
The android didn’t take his eyes off his case partner. Slowly, he sat down beside her on the bed. She was still trembling, her mouth slightly open, her eyes unfocused as if she had just taken a blow to the head. Connor began scanning her symptoms and finally concluded that she was in shock. The android stood up, positioning himself beside her. 
“You’re in shock,” Connor announced, as practical as ever. “That’s why you need to relax and rest to recover. Lt. Anderson and I need you well.” 
He leaned down and placed one arm around the inspector’s back and the other under her knees. With little effort, he lifted her into his arms and turned toward a slightly ajar door on the side of the room. The inspector remained motionless: still and silent, like an oversized doll. Connor pushed the door open with his foot and entered the bathroom. Gently, he set her down on the toilet and went to the bathtub. He turned on both faucets until adjusting the water to a comfortable temperature. When the tub was relatively full, Connor lifted her into his arms again and carefully placed her into the water. The warmth made her take two deep breaths. She blinked several times, finally moving her head from side to side. At last, she seemed to notice the android’s presence. 
“Connor? What are you…” Her voice trailed off as she realized she was in the bathroom, inside her bathtub… wearing the lingerie Connor had given her. 
In one swift movement, she pulled her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and hiding her face with her hands. 
“Oh my God, how embarrassing! Connor, get out of here.” 
“I’m sorry, Inspector, but I can’t do that. Until I ensure that you are recovered and safe, I won’t allow you to be alone.” 
“I’m fine, for God’s sake, get out!” 
“I can’t guarantee that based on your diagnosis, Inspector. You need to recover before returning to work. Therefore, you will be under observation for now. I appreciate your cooperation in advance.” 
“Wait, you’re scanning me…” 
But she couldn’t finish the sentence: Connor turned on the shower, sending a powerful jet of water over her head. She let out a small squeal and shrank further down, now hiding her face between her bent knees. However, the pressure of the warm water on her head, combined with her body being submerged, made her feel calmer and safer, and gradually she began to relax. The android looked around and focused on some bottles arranged along the edge of the bathtub. His analysis program identified them, and a new command appeared on his interface: 
“Wash her hair.” 
Connor grabbed the shampoo bottle and turned off the shower. A bit awkward, as he hadn’t been programmed for this, the android poured an excessive amount onto the top of the inspector’s head, causing her to shrink back at the feel of the viscous, cold liquid. Similarly, but ensuring he did it gently, Connor began to rub her hair, producing foam. The texture was amusing, and once mixed with her hair, it became quite pleasant. The android first scrubbed the top, then worked his way down the sides to her neck. Even though he was clumsy with the task, the pressure of Connor’s fingers on her head seemed to recharge her energy and dispel all the bad thoughts. A warm flush began to rise in her cheeks, and it definitely wasn’t just from the hot water. Connor turned the shower back on to rinse her hair. His movements were as delicate and careful as before, but now they sent shivers down her spine, especially when his fingers brushed her neck. The warmth in her face increased, and she unconsciously shrank back. 
“Is there a problem?” the android asked, stopping his movements. 
Unable to look at him, she just shook her head negatively. 
“I’m going to apply conditioner now.” 
She lifted her head slightly, just enough to see what the android was doing. When she saw him about to pour the bottle over her head like he did with the shampoo, she quickly grabbed his wrist. 
“That only goes on the ends,” she explained, meeting his surprised gaze. 
“Oh. Sorry. Understood, Inspector.” 
Connor poured some of the cream into his hands and began to massage the ends of her hair. The gentle tugs returned to send shivers through her, causing the rigidity from her earlier embarrassment to yield to a lethargy of relaxation. She instructed him to let it sit for a minute, and then the android turned the shower back on. When he finished, she saw Connor reaching for the soap dish. She understood immediately and grabbed his wrist. 
“I’ll take care of this myself. You can wait outside the bathroom.” 
“Sorry, Inspector. But I’ve already said I won’t leave you alone.” 
She huffed impatiently and said, “Then turn around.” 
Connor obeyed. He heard the sound of soap being vigorously rubbed against her skin and for a moment, he wondered what the texture would be like. Something inside his chest seemed to vibrate, making the android fidget. What kind of thought was that? Why did he want to know? 
Half a minute later, she rinsed off the foam with bathwater and opened the drain. She stood up with difficulty, looking dizzy. Connor immediately turned around and extended an arm to help her out of the tub. Once he was sure she wouldn’t fall, he took her towel and draped it over her shoulders. The inspector pulled it to dry herself. In the process, she stumbled toward the bedroom. Lastly, she carefully rubbed her hair and wrapped it in the towel. 
“I… need to change,” she finally said, a slight tone of shyness in her voice. 
Connor nodded and continued watching her. She closed her eyes and sighed. 
“I need privacy to do this.” 
“Understood, Inspector,” he said, turning around as he did so. 
Giving up on arguing, with an impatient huff, she went to the closet. She discarded her soaked lingerie and dressed with her eyes fixed on the android, but he didn’t move a single millimeter. 
“Done.” 
Connor turned just in time to catch something she threw at him. 
“Put this on. Your clothes are all wet,” she said, unable to look Connor in the eye. 
She seemed quite embarrassed. 
The android analyzed the bundle of fabric she had thrown. 
It was a gray men’s sports sweatshirt. Scanning it, he detected a short hair. The sequencing ran instantly, revealing that the hair belonged to Ryan Richmond… her boyfriend. 
“Are you sure I can wear this?” Connor asked. “It belongs to your boyfriend.” 
“Ex-boyfriend, please,” she said, looking even sadder and more embarrassed. 
Connor’s LED flashed in alarm. He couldn’t let her feel any sadder, or they might revert to square one. And Connor definitely wouldn’t let that happen. 
“Thank you very much,” he said, trying to sound as gentle as possible. And right there, without warning, he began to undress. 
“Connor!” she yelled, covering her face with her hands and turning away. “What the hell are you doing?” 
“I’m undressing to put on the clothes you lent me.” 
“But you can’t do that in front of me!” 
“Why not?” 
She turned back to face the android. 
Peeking between her fingers to see if it was safe, she saw he had only taken off his jacket. 
“Because…” She seemed to struggle to get the next words out. “I don’t know if your realism applies to the whole body.” 
Connor stared at her, looking even more confused. 
“Argh…!” She seemed about to explode from embarrassment. She continued to cover her face unconsciously. “Adult humans don’t change in front of each other unless they’re intimate. That’s why I asked you to turn around!” 
“But I’m an android.” 
“Oh, I give up! Come on.” She turned her back to Connor again and covered her face tightly. “You can change.” 
Still not understanding his partner’s reaction, Connor undressed and put on the sweatshirt. 
“Done.” 
Much slower than he had, the inspector turned. The moment she laid eyes on Connor dressed in her ex-boyfriend’s hoodie, her eyes widened and sparkled. 
Even from afar, Connor could see that her face had slightly changed color. However, it was only for two seconds; the inspector quickly diverted her gaze to the ground and lowered her head sadly. Connor’s LED started blinking again. It was at that moment he processed that her face still held remnants of makeup. The bathwater hadn’t washed everything away. 
Practical and straightforward, Connor walked up to the inspector, positioning himself quite close. This made her take two steps back, startled. 
“What—?” she asked, her voice trembling. 
The android raised his right hand as if to hold the inspector’s face. Her heart raced, and she held her breath. 
“Your face,” the android replied, simply making a pointing gesture with a finger. “You still have makeup on.” 
A command appeared on Connor’s interface: 
“Remove the makeup from the inspector.” 
“Ah…!” The inspector let out an exasperated sigh and covered her face again, embarrassed. But then she raised a hand and punched the android’s shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?!” 
Crap! I must look like a ghost! 
She turned around Connor and headed for the bathroom, but something pulled at her arm. The inspector turned back. 
The android held her firmly, looking calm. “Stay here,” he said, gently guiding her to the edge of the bed and sitting her down. “Don’t worry; I’ll do this for you.” 
The inspector’s eyes widened, and she blinked twice, but then she put on a neutral expression. 
“Connor, have you ever removed someone’s makeup before?” 
“No.” 
“Do you know what you need?” 
“Some makeup remover.” 
“And…?” 
The android fell silent. The inspector sighed. 
“In the cabinet below, there’s a pack of wipes. Get the biphasic makeup remover, the micellar water, and the moisturizer for the face. They’re on the same shelf.” 
Connor nodded and went to the bathroom. Thanks to his analysis program, he found all the products in seconds and returned. He sat next to the inspector, placing everything in her lap. The inspector reached for the pack of wipes, but Connor grabbed it first. “I’ll do it.” 
She pressed her lips together in a grimace that Connor had learned to identify: she was embarrassed. 
Resigned, the inspector kept her face turned toward the android and closed her eyes. “The makeup remover first,” she whispered to him. 
Connor dampened (perhaps excessively) a wipe with the makeup remover and started gently applying it to the spots where the dark stains were most visible. He began with the eye area and suddenly realized he liked the shape of the inspector’s eyebrows. There was a gap at the end of the left one, and Connor thought it made her very unique. Then he moved down to her cheeks, going upward along the side, and noticed a group of four moles that aligned perfectly, the first at the tip of her eyebrow and the last at the side of her chin. Connor liked that symmetry. With smooth movements, the android rubbed along her jawline and realized that the shape of the curve was quite pleasant, giving a beautiful contour to her face. Then he moved to her lips, which still had red stains. His fingers slipped while cleaning her lower lip and, inadvertently, brushed against the upper one. The texture was… 
What was the word again? 
Unbeknownst to him, the android had paused the cleaning process and was staring intently at the inspector’s mouth. 
Without opening her eyes, she called, “Connor?” 
“Ah!” He seemed to wake up from a trance. He blinked twice and resumed the task. “Sorry.” 
“Is there a problem?” 
“No.” 
The inspector seemed about to retort but fell silent. “You need to do the neck as well,” she instructed after Connor had finished the very meticulous cleaning of her face. 
This made the android lean closer to see what he was doing, and without realizing it, he got too close. 
The inspector flinched. 
“Is everything okay, inspector?” 
“Y-yeah…” She hesitated for two seconds before continuing, “I didn’t… realize androids breathed.” 
Connor blinked, a question mark between his eyebrows. “Um… I felt… you breathed a little… on my neck.” 
“Ah… Actually, we don’t need to breathe. However, to make our voice sound realistic, the vocal system mimics that of humans. That’s why we need to inhale air to speak.” 
The inspector simply nodded, nervous. Connor resumed the cleaning with the makeup remover and started the process again with the wipe, but this time using micellar water. Finally, it was time for the moisturizer. 
“And just a little, okay? Put it on your fingers, spread it a bit, and a-apply it.” 
Seeming oblivious to the inspector’s nervousness, Connor followed the orders meticulously, appearing overly focused on doing everything correctly. 
However, the moment his fingers touched the inspector’s skin, his mind drifted back a few minutes to when he had wondered what her skin would feel like. His LED blinked multiple times as he spread the cream. Connor tried to absorb every tiny detail of the inspector’s skin, as he had never imagined that touching something could be so… amazing. 
He felt every line, elevation, change in texture, and memorized it like he had never memorized anything before. Unbeknownst to him, his touch became lighter and lighter until… “Connor?” 
The inspector had opened her eyes. There was a strange mix of emotions in her gaze that he couldn’t identify. 
“What are you doing?” 
That was when Connor realized he had been gently caressing the inspector’s right cheek. 
“Oh, I’m sorry,” he said candidly. “The texture of your skin is very pleasant. That’s why I think I got distracted.” 
In a sudden movement, the inspector pulled the towel wrapped around her hair in front of her face. She stood up the same way and headed to the bathroom. 
“What’s wrong, inspector?” Connor asked, completely oblivious. 
“Don’t come here,” she ordered, removing the towel from her hair and grabbing a brush. 
Defying her order, Connor followed her and immobilized her arm, holding onto the brush. 
“I said I would do this for you.” 
“No, Connor, stop! You’ve done enough!” she almost shouted. 
Instead of insisting, Connor froze. The inspector found his sudden surrender strange, then stared at him. 
“Oh no.” 
“I’m sorry,” he said, looking down sadly. “I think I didn’t respect your personal space, inspector. Please forgive me for upsetting you.” 
“Oh no,” she repeated mentally as she saw that look forming on Connor’s face. “The sad puppy dog expression.” 
Dejected, the android released the brush and left the bathroom. Feeling her heart shatter, the inspector acted without thinking: she spun on her heels and grabbed Connor’s sweatshirt. He turned, eyebrows raised. Without saying a word, she extended the brush toward him. Still looking lost, Connor took the brush as if it might explode if he moved incorrectly. The inspector turned her back, and he understood. 
Intrigued, he began to brush her hair slowly. 
Meanwhile, the inspector reflected on the fact that Ryan had never brushed her hair or washed it. He hadn’t even helped with her makeup. She took a deep breath, focusing on the sensation of the brush separating the tangled strands of her hair. 
She felt very alert, as if her senses had been amplified. She had the impression of feeling her blood flow, spreading warmth and oxygen throughout her body. She loved that feeling because she had been searching for it for a long time. 
The feeling of being alive. 
And Ryan had been unable to make her feel this way, while an android had done it through such simple things… 
Connor finished brushing her hair and ran his hand through the strands, putting them back in place. The inspector’s heart raced, and several chills spread from her neck to her shoulders. 
“Oh, this is getting difficult…” 
“Let’s go to the living room,” Connor suggested. Was it her imagination, or did his usual direct tone seem to waver? “Let’s find something to distract you.” 
Without lifting her eyes to the android, she simply nodded and followed him. He led her to the couch and pulled several cushions closer to her. He turned on the TV with a voice command and asked, “Which channel do you want to watch?” 
“Any,” she replied in a whisper. 
Connor frowned. His analysis program ran instantly, searching for information that would help him. He found a few mentions of shows she liked and matched them with the programming of the 1567 available channels. Connor said a number aloud, and the screen flickered, displaying the first few minutes of the movie “Her.” The inspector didn’t move. 
“You should eat,” Connor said, shaking his head. 
“I’m not hungry.” She curled up and hugged her knees, hating how weak her voice sounded. She felt like a silly, shy schoolgirl next to a college student five years older for whom she had a crush. 
Connor watched her and finally decided to sit next to her. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye. He sat up straight, both feet firmly on the floor, his hands resting on his lap. 
“Relax, Connor,” she signaled for him to lean back. 
“Oh. Thank you.” 
He leaned back on the couch, but still seemed like a well-behaved boy waiting in the principal’s office to receive an award for his impeccable report card. A long silence followed, in which only the sound of the TV could be heard. Connor felt strange. His mind wandered, replaying the last hour over and over. He saw her again wearing the lingerie he had given her, her face soaked with tears, and the gun pressed to her head. Connor’s LED flashed, turning yellow for a moment. Remembering that made him feel horrible. One of those feelings that started deep in his stomach… 
Fear. 
Connor turned to look at her. A command that had appeared earlier reappeared. 
“Discover what happened.” 
The android felt a sudden urge to ask about the lingerie. Why was she wearing it in a situation like that? However, he knew he could ruin everything. He needed to keep her calm. She needed to recover and be okay. He couldn’t let that terrible scene repeat itself. It would be better not to mention the incident. 
The android didn’t realize it, but his LED had been flashing yellow throughout his reasoning. 
“Connor?” 
The android lifted his head. He hadn’t noticed he was staring at his hands, now clenched into fists. 
“Are you okay?” she seemed concerned. “Your LED is…” 
The sentence trailed off. She looked at him anxiously. Two impulses battled within him. 
Should he ask about the lingerie or stay quiet? 
“When I found you…” Connor began slowly. “Why were you wearing the lingerie I gave you?” 
A mix of shame, sadness, and anger covered her face with a shadow. She lowered her eyes, returning to gaze at her folded knees, and shrank even further. An uncomfortable silence thickened between them. As the seconds dragged on, Connor’s LED began to blink again until it turned yellow. 
“If you don’t feel comfortable answering, you don’t have to…” 
“I was waiting for Ryan,” she blurted out, her eyes squeezed shut. “I was… I had been worried about our relationship for a while. He didn’t seem interested in me anymore. The time we spent together dwindled to almost once every two weeks. He made excuses and appointments, and… he cut me off every time I tried to discuss what was happening. So… I started to think that maybe I had become… uninteresting.” 
The word slipped from her lips like a curse. Connor’s LED continued to blink. Seeing her face marked with so many negative emotions was… 
“So I thought maybe I could invest in the… sexual part of the relationship. Men like women with attitude in this area… and I’ve never had much. I’m not very good at it, so I feel insecure… about everything. That’s why I thought I’d start slowly. That’s when Lilith suggested the lingerie.” Her eyes searched Connor’s face for just a fraction of a second. The android’s eyebrows were furrowed, as if he were frustrated and confused. “Some men have fetishes for lingerie—and please don’t ask me to explain what a fetish is right now—so it seemed like a safe bet. I was saving up to buy one, but it would take a while. I wanted a specific style that Ryan had already mentioned he liked. Then you gifted me one… and I honestly didn’t know what to do. It felt wrong to wear the lingerie you gave me with another guy, but well… that’s not the point right now. With the lingerie in hand, I decided to surprise Ryan. I asked for the night off, did my makeup, prepared a few things, and waited for him to come home from work. But… he didn’t come back alone. I think he thought I would be on a call or filling out reports because I had been in that routine for almost two weeks…” 
Her voice died as it became too choked. She took a few deep breaths, the air coming out in short gasps. Unconsciously, Connor moved closer in a protective manner, his eyebrows marking an expression of pain. It was awful… It was awful to see her in that state. 
“He was with another woman. She… was beautiful, you know? I wouldn’t be surprised if I found her face on the cover of Vogue. And they… went into the room half-naked. She was just in her blouse and underwear, already half-unbuttoned, and he was shirtless. Just imagine their faces when they saw me.” She let out a lifeless chuckle. “And Ryan had the nerve to ask what I was doing there. Well, I live here, right? The real question was what the other woman was doing in my house, in my room.” She sighed heavily. “Look, I’m not going to go into details about the horrors I heard from Ryan and that witch, or the horrors I said. In the end, I just lost it. He insisted that I couldn’t kick him out since he had already started to move out… I think he was trying to figure out how to keep the house for himself. He was a good professional but a complete idiot with his own money. He could never save enough to buy a decent pair of sneakers. Ah… Then I did what I shouldn’t have: I grabbed the gun. I was so desperate to be alone, to never see that bastard’s face again… I lost my mind. That’s when I stormed out like the crazy one in the story. In the end, I think that was the thrill Ryan found in me: cheating on a police girlfriend!” Her voice rose in tone, laden with irony. “How exciting, right? Always risking my neck. What better way to inject some good adrenaline into the relationship?” 
She fell silent, her head still lowered, her face devoid of the energy that her ironic voice had shown. A long silence thickened between them again, during which Connor realized an important detail was missing from that story. How had she ended up with the gun pointed at her own head? How had she come to want to take her own life? Was it all because of this Ryan? No… It couldn’t be. It didn’t match her personality. The inspector he knew was a strong, untamed woman who knew exactly who she was and what she wanted. So why…? 
Connor called her name slowly, weighing each letter he chose. “I confess I’m a little confused. You said you pulled the gun to scare them away from your house.” 
It took her a few seconds, but the inspector understood. She pressed her lips together and lowered her legs, resting her hands on the couch. Still with her head down, she asked in a whisper: 
“You want to know why I had the gun pointed at my head if I said I pulled it to scare them away, right?” 
Connor raised his eyebrows, surprised at how direct she had been. Still cautious, he slowly nodded. She lowered her head a bit more, and he heard her sniffle. 
“Can I ask you something before I answer?” Her voice was choked. 
“Of course.” 
“Why do you want to know the reason?” 
“If I know the reason, I can think of a strategy to avoid it. And then, it will never happen again.” 
“Why…” She slowly raised her head until her gaze met Connor’s. Her eyes, bright and watery, seemed loaded with the stubbornness and determination of someone ready for the worst answer but also prepared to counter it. “You don’t want this to happen again?” 
Scenes paraded before the android’s eyes. He imagined his entire routine, all the cases… without her. He envisioned himself following Hank’s shadow without hearing her laughter, which had broken the tension of investigations and the gloomy atmosphere of Detroit so many times. He imagined the absence of her teasing Hank and how she could disarm the lieutenant’s scowl, making Connor’s life so much easier. He imagined finishing a case without receiving her “thumbs up.” He envisioned all the intriguing, human experiences the inspector had provided him. He imagined arriving at the police station and not hearing the only “good morning” he ever got. 
“Because if you die…” Connor didn’t look away, but he seemed confused… Not because of the sensations, but because the answer was now so obvious to him that he couldn’t understand why it wasn’t obvious to her as well. “Everything will feel so empty.” 
From the inspector’s expression, it was clear she wasn’t expecting that response. Her eyes widened, and a few tears fell. She immediately covered her face with her hands and tried to dry it without much success. 
“Hey! I’m sorry!” Connor stumbled over his words. “I didn’t mean to make you cry!” 
Unconsciously, the android raised his hands and gently placed them on each side of her face, which froze. With her hands hiding her expression, she was still sniffling. 
“D-Don’t apologize, C-Connor. It’s just that…” Her sobs interrupted her speech, and soon her voice fell silent again. She took several long breaths, trying to stop crying. “No one… No one has ever said that to me before.” 
Connor blinked several times. Gradually, she stopped crying and managed to lift her face. She sighed, wiping her face one last time, and Connor withdrew his hands to give her space. Staring at her bent leg on the couch, she continued her explanation: 
“The truth is… I feel very alone. Not because I live alone. It’s that… I have no one. Ever since I can remember, I’ve never had anyone who cared about me. If I had eaten, if I was thirsty, if I had gone to school. If anyone ever did that for me…” A shadow passed over her eyes. There was anger in her voice. “It was to fulfill a protocol. Because if it were genuine, I wouldn’t have been abandoned the way I was. So basically, what I was given was just the fact of being alive. And for some reason that I still don’t quite understand, I… held on to my existence with all my might. I didn’t want to stop existing… just because no one cared about me. So I insisted. I looked for people I wanted to be with… I met Lilith at school, and then we decided to become police officers. That’s when I ran into Hank.” Her voice dropped a little, sounding sorrowful. “He… was impossible at first. Not that he’s improved much. I made the mistake of… starting to see him as a father. I wanted him to care about me, but… he never stopped trying to kill himself. That’s why… I lost it that day we found him collapsed at his house. Russian roulette… that idiot.” 
She paused, focusing on her breathing to avoid crying again. 
“That day, I realized I could never replace Cole. Nothing could. That’s when I understood I wasn’t… a reason for Hank to live. He didn’t care. I felt empty. I felt adrift in a limbo that no one else could access. And soon after, Lilith showed up with the news that she was getting married and… moving to Chicago. Gradually, I was losing the connections that kept me here. Ryan was the last straw. When I kicked him out of my house with that bimbo, it felt like I had become the last human being alive on the face of the Earth… I had never felt so alone. I don’t even remember exactly what I did; I just remember when I realized I was still holding the gun. The idea popped into my head instantly. I felt relieved. Because I knew that idea… would work. I would stop feeling— 
The inspector abruptly interrupted her speech, as something firmly grabbed her wrist. She looked up, startled, and saw that Connor appeared even more frightened; his hand was nearly crushing her arm. 
“Please…” Connor said in a trembling voice. She had never heard him speak like that before. “Never again. You can never do that again.” 
The inspector covered the android’s hand with her own, squeezing it gently. Seeing him like that temporarily erased all the memories and dark feelings that had haunted her account, igniting her protective instincts. 
“Connor, it’s okay. I’m here. I’m alive.” 
The android’s eyes seemed unfocused, as if he were seeing something beyond. On his interface, several commands flashed urgently, all concerning the inspector’s safety and well-being. 
“I felt…” His voice came out choppy. “When I saw you with the gun to your head… I felt… Fear. 
I was terrified. And when you started talking about what you felt… It was like I was feeling it too. It’s very sad and… frightening.” 
The inspector now held the android’s hand with both of hers, caressing the back. 
“And I am… feeling all of this… And I just feel. I can’t understand, I… want to understand why I’m feeling all of this.” 
Then, as if a light had turned on inside his head, Connor saw Hank sitting on the back of the bench. He heard his own voice, which now sounded very mechanical. 
“So you’re saying I should like the inspector?” 
Next was Hank’s voice, laced with a light mockery that he hadn’t noticed at the time. 
“And don’t you already like her?” 
The inspector observed Connor’s face, and she could swear she saw his neural biocomponents working as he reasoned. 
Finally, Connor lowered his head, and a tiny smile curved his lips. 
“Hank already answered that.” 
He raised his eyes and stared at the inspector for a long time and finally said, “I think… it’s because I like you.” 
If the inspector had been drinking something at that moment, she would have definitely choked. Her eyes widened, and she felt her face flush almost instantly. 
“Hey! You can’t say that kind of thing like that!” she protested, looking away. 
“Why not?” Connor frowned. He had used Hank’s exact words. What was wrong with that? 
“Because I might misunderstand.” 
“How so?” 
The inspector sighed, trying to stay calm in the face of Connor’s eternal slowness regarding human matters he got involved in. 
“Because… there are two ways to like someone.” 
“Aah…” The android sounded as if he truly understood. The inspector doubted it. “So you want me to be specific?” 
“Maybe.” She still hadn’t looked directly at Connor. 
The android pondered for a few moments until he finally asked, “How do I know?” 
The inspector perfectly mimicked the way Hank would cover his face with one hand, frustrated. 
“Oh, heavens…” she sighed. “We can like someone in a brotherly way, like me and Lilith. We like who each other is, we enjoy doing things together, we get along, we have common interests, and we care about each other. That’s why we consider ourselves friends. Or you can like in a way that…” 
Her voice trailed off, and she pressed her lips together. Connor leaned in her direction, eyebrows raised in an encouraging gesture. 
“That…?” 
“That… you get curious to see me wearing lingerie, for example.” 
“To be honest, I did a simulation…” 
“Connor, that was a joke! Argh!” The inspector pulled her legs up again and hid her face between her knees and crossed arms. “I could have gone to bed without that… And so could you.” 
“In fact, I thought you looked beautiful in all thirty-seven outfits I tested. I did the simulation the day I went shopping, to make sure it fit…” 
“Connor!” Practically in a panic, the inspector lunged at the android and covered his mouth with one hand. He blinked several times, surprised by his partner’s reaction. “Those details… I’m not mentally prepared for them…” 
Connor continued watching her, intrigued. She lowered her eyes, her lips pressed together again in an anxious expression. Finally, she closed her eyes and sighed heavily, lowering the hand that had covered her partner’s mouth. 
“Ah… this isn’t making things easier.” 
A question appeared between Connor’s furrowed eyebrows. The inspector looked at him reluctantly, but she was already yielding to resignation. 
“Because I also like you,” she explained. 
“Like… how?” 
The inspector hesitated. 
“Like the second way.” 
“That means that… you want to see me in lingerie?” 
The inspector stared at him blankly for a few seconds and then suddenly burst into laughter. She doubled over, her arms wrapping around her belly. A silly smile curved Connor’s lips. Even though he knew it wasn’t the inspector’s authentic laughter, it was laughter. And she laughed because of him. He recorded every sound, every angle of the inspector’s laugh. He was sure he could replay that scene over and over and never tire of it. 
“Um…” said the inspector, catching her breath. “You could say yes, but… wait. There are many steps before lingerie. Actually… when we like someone the second way, we want to do things like… kiss, for example.” 
Her eyes, once bright from tears, now sparkled with something else. And Connor liked that sparkle. 
“So, you want to… kiss me?” 
The inspector’s face flushed for the umpteenth time. She would never get used to how direct Connor could be. 
“Maybe.” 
“Why maybe?” 
The inspector slowly lifted her face, her eyes meeting Connor’s in a different way. She was obviously shy, but her mouth was pressed into a suppressed smile. She didn’t seem a little… mischievous? 
“I can’t kiss you if you don’t want to kiss me too.” 
Connor's eyes immediately fell to his partner's mouth. He remembered a few minutes earlier when he was wiping her lips with a makeup remover cloth to remove the last traces of lipstick. He recalled how intrigued he had been when his finger accidentally brushed against her upper lip... He wanted to better feel the texture. Unbeknownst to him, Connor leaned in, his eyes tracing the outline of the inspector's lips. The inspector felt her heart race as her eyelids reflexively closed. Connor noticed the movement and mimicked her. The android felt his lips brush against hers and hesitated. He felt the warm, vibrant breath of the inspector. 
It felt as if she were caressing his skin... which seemed less artificial by the second. With an unprecedented sigh, Connor sealed his lips against hers. The first thing he felt was how soft they were. The second was that they were warm. 
The third was a vague notion that she had a tiny bruise on the lower left corner... It was then that Connor's mind shut down. 
The inspector parted her lips and gently captured his lower lip between hers. The gesture seemed to inject an electric jolt into all his biocomponents. With every caress, with every sigh, he felt himself awakening from a trance. The softness and warmth of the inspector's mouth mixed with the wonderful sound of her laughter and the gentle rhythm of her breathing... 
He allowed himself to be overwhelmed by her. All the confused thoughts that still felt like commands disappeared, and he felt safe, free, and... alive. 
Connor didn't know how long he stayed there feeling just the inspector. He only knew that at some point (too soon, in fact), she pulled away and gasped for air.  
However, Connor had barely processed the absence of her touch before he felt the inspector's skin against his again, their foreheads resting together. They remained silent for a few minutes, focusing on each other's presence. 
Finally, Connor couldn't hold back any longer and asked, "What else... what else can we do now that we like each other?" 
The inspector remained silent, her eyes still closed. Connor didn't know if she was contemplating his question or if she had even heard it. In a shy yet sincere tone, he began, "A simulation... It's not the same as seeing it for real... Considering what you said earlier, could I... see you wearing the lingerie I gave you?" 
"C-Connor!" 
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sleepymccoy · 3 months ago
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I have some general anxiety about going to supermarkets aimed at specific cultures because the intended clientele is not lil white me and the staff often don't speak english and I feel inappropriate. But not once has this been true, and I've always enjoyed my visit. Anyway, that's a preface so you can appreciate how brave I am
My colleague recently made me lahpet which is a Burmese salad including pickled tea leaves, dried beans mix, and tomatoes. I loved it and wanted more. I live in a densely Chinese area and thought one of the many supermarkets might have something Burmese, so I brought the empty jar to every store.
Many don't speak english, but that's fine. I had a jar! All interactions basically went like this;
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None of them knew Burmese so couldn't even tell me if they had something similar
I gave up and bought it online. Also had a hard time with that cos they don't deliver to apartments (got the vibe that it's just the shop owners son doing deliveries and he couldn't be fucked going upstairs. Valid). But I persevered and got three jars! And the dried beans mix I needed. Way too many dried beans, I totally misjudged the size of the bag being sold
I used one to show my friends this salad. They didn't go as insane over it as I did. I gave another jar to my dad who did go appropriately insane. He said he liked it, then five min later interrupted to say he really liked it, then after dinner spent time with me going through the ingredients and trying to figure out if he can pickle tea leaves himself. Booyah.
Regardless, this left me with one jar which I swiftly finished. So I'm on the hunt again and the online store stresses me out now cos they don't like apartments
I found a Burmese supermarket a few suburbs away and a twenty min walk from the station. Fucking worth it, it's added two hours to my commute home but I want these jars so much. I enjoyed the stroll. It rained a bit, so I saw a couple rainbows
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In the store I was, again, immediately stressed. I went down an aisle and back again and found nothing. I found other pickled things! But not my tea leaves! I did not want this trip to be in vain, it was long and I had a shit day at work. I was really only doing it today cos the days a write off as a bad day so I may as well run an annoying errand
Anyway I pulled up the website and showed the lady at the counter a photo of the jar and she pointed me to them immediately. I returned like fifteen seconds later with four jars and she was already on a phone call with someone. I love workers rights. You're awesome, lady.
So I say four and hold four fingers up and pass her one jar. She scans and sets the price right. She then interrupts whoever's talking on the phone to ask me, "How you know this?"
So I quickly explained that my colleague made me the salad and I loved it. She pointed back at the aisle and said, "the beans, you need beans." So I was like "I have so many beans, I bought too many, I just need the pickled leaves." And she was already waving her hand at me in disinterest so I stopped talking and paid lol.
It was a long haul home. I passed and remember to take a photo of my favourite art installation, the tower of coffee cups in a pole.
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There's no starbucks in my suburb so one of these at least has taken a long trip to get here. So did I today, my feet are sore
Anyway, I have four jars of miraculous pickled tea leaves. If you can figure out how to buy these ingredients I recommend it to serve alongside very fatty meals like lasagne or sausage cos it cuts through nicely. I also take a serving to work every day because the tea leaves are caffeinated so I'm skipping the second coffee
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I love lahpet
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mist-the-wannabe-linguist · 5 months ago
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Once again thinking about the Buchlov castle. What the fuck is that place. If it was an English or a German castle I bet there would already be a two hour creepy history video on youtube. What the hell. It's got everything
- one of the owners, Jindřich Prakšický, was found stabbed with his own sword and the murderer never found, but it was probably his wife Kateřina Rájecká
- she may be the ghost "the Dark Lady" that haunts one of the rooms
- the Dark Lady might also be lady Hildegarde who murdered her sister so she could marry her husband. when he found out she was the murderer, he stabbed her to death
- the room also has a real Egyptian mummy that allegedly radiates extremely negative energy (I would too if someone robbed my grave and sold me to a different continent to some rich fuck as a wedding gift)
- it' said there is a ghost of a knight from a nearby castle who used to kidnap women. one day his castle suddenly exploded and they found several skeletons in the ruins. the ghost then apparently decided to move to Buchlov
- one of the owners, Leopold I Berchtold was obsessed with medicine because when he was young, his brother died of the plague and was buried, but when the tomb was reopened, they found his body by the entrance with chunks bitten out of the arm so they assumed he was buried alive. this traumatized him for life
- Leopold then established a "needle test" where a needle was driven through a corpse's heart before burial to make sure it's dead
- he also came up with several safety measures for various professions, established mandatory smallpox vaccines (in the 1800s) and founded a hospital free for all patients regardless of class. this nearly drove him bankrupt
- it is said there are three different treasures buried somewhere near or under the castle
- there is a room full of taxidermied animals, a specimen of a newborn pig with one head and two bodies, skeleton of a human fetus and several real human skulls. for some reason Leopold used one of these skulls as a note pad
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dumbseee · 9 months ago
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boyfriend!iwaizumi when you’re a famous idol.
iwaizumi hajime x fem!reader.
genre: fluff.
warnings: bad english/grammar :p /mention of the kpop industry (in here, dating someone is less taboo than it is in real life) / first work so it’s not that good.
_
after high school, you left japan for south korea, you always had this dream of becoming a kpop idol. during your time in seijoh, you were already known for being an amazing dancer but also for your angelic voice.
iwaizumi would always brag about you to the volleyball team, oikawa would tease him about you leaving him for a famous korean actor, after you became famous. to which, iwaizumi would respond with a kick in his friend’s back. truth be told, he was actually very scared of what the future had in store for you two after high school. he didn’t know if long distance would work for you, or if you even wanted it in the first place.
during your last school day, iwaizumi walked you back home, like he always did, but he seemed out of it and almost, sad? you asked him what was wrong and he told you that if you wanted to break up with him to focus on your dreams, he’d respect your decision and always support you. he couldn’t even look at you, tears starting to form in the corner of his eyes as he tried his best to keep a straight face. his words surprised you and broke your heart because you never knew that iwaizumi could be so dumb to think that you’d break up with him like that. "no matter the distance, it will never make me forget about how much i love you, hajime."
so you left for south korea and he left for america to study. you two called each other everyday, when you two were too busy, you’d try to call at least twice a week. iwaizumi was busy with school and finals took all his time while your trainee program took up yours. but somehow you two made it work. a few years later, you debuted as a soloist and sold millions with your first album whilst iwaizumi came back to japan after graduating, and became an athletic trainer for japan national volleyball team. you couldn’t be prouder of him, and you were his pride. he streamed all your songs, putting them on speaker while the boys would practice, he brought all your albums and watched the variety shows you were featured in. he was basically the president of your fanclub. and he wasn’t ashamed of it.
you two always made sure to go together on vacation in a foreign country, where kpop wasn’t really the thing. the distance actually strengthened your relationship since being apart of each other for so long, made the reunion better. you knew iwaizumi was it for you, and he was also your muse for your music. your fans often joked about how inspired and how deep your love songs were. it made you laugh to read all their theories about you being married to a farmer. if only they knew…
iwaizumi never minded being your secret boyfriend, he actually liked it that way. he didn’t know if he could bare being in the public eye every time. knowing that you were south korea’s sweetheart, being your public boyfriend would mean saying goodbye to his peaceful life, and iwaizumi wasn’t ready for that. well, he wasn’t ready yet. one day, he woke up to his phone being blown up by messages, actually tons of messages, from the groupchat he shared with the japan national team. he even had missed calls from oikawa, and all his close friends.
shoyo: IWAIZUMI-SENPAIIIIII
SID YOU SEE HHE NEWS???
kageyama: learn how to spell, idiot.
ushijima: blowing up his phone isn’t the best way to announce something like that.
bokuto: HAJI-SAN IT’S TERRIBLE ARE YOU OKAY??
atsumu: JUST SHUT UP
let the man wake up peacefully damn
shoyo: IT WAS TO BE A FAKE NEWS RIGHT??
bokuto: YEAH L/N-SAN WOULD NEVER DO THAT
iwaizumi: what the fuck?
ushijima: you should check twitter, hajime.
iwaizumi had frowned, but went on twitter, an app you forced him to subscribe to. apparently it was the genz’s newspaper. to his surprise, your face was all over his feed, it wasn’t surprising because he liked everything about you, followed dozens of fan account and basically became a fan account himself. but what surprised him was seeing those big account talking about your "relationship" with a famous korean actor.
"l/n y/n, the famous soloist who stole everyone’s heart with her heartfelt songs and beautiful looks, is dating a/l a/n!"
his eyes widened as he typed your name to call you immediately. his heart was beating so fast as he didn’t know how to feel about this. of course it was fake news, right? he knew you’d never cheat on him, you loved each other and iwaizumi couldn’t see his life without you in it. he quickly became aware of how much he loved you and how important you were in his life. without you, iwaizumi would be nothing but an empty shell. "hajime? thank god, i tried to call you!" your voice made him release a breath he didn’t know he was holding. "you saw, right?" your voice was small and for a second he thought that maybe you called him to announce your new relationship with this dumbass actor. "yeah, it’s not that fun to wakeup to your friends blowing up your phone and news outlets talking about your girlfriend’s relationship with that fucker." he rubbed his face with his free hand. "these idiots took pictures of us while we were in cabo and thought it was a/n. apparently you two look alike." he heard you chuckle which made him feel warm inside. he hated the fact that he doubted you for a second. suddenly, an idea popped up in his head, a crazy one but still. "you have an award show in a week right?" he asked you, a smile tugging at his lips. "yeah, why?"
well, iwaizumi’s idea was indeed crazy but you didn’t care, you were down for it. and as your name got called in the category, "best female artist", iwaizumi was next to you, he stood up before you could even understand what was going on, and he kissed you. showing to the world, that you were his as much as he was yours. it was a crazy way to launch your relationship to the world, but you didn’t care, because as long as you were together, nothing could happen.
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iknwreid · 3 months ago
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pumpkin – spencer reid x reader.
spencer loves autumn and halloween so much, and you and him are always togheter, this time for a pumpkin carving.
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wc: 2.5k | disclamers: fluff, realy fluffly. bau!reader. no use of y/n. | a/n: english is not my first language, also, this is my very first time writing a fic in english, lmk if theres anything i can improve. glasses reid is my favorite. text divider by cafekitsune.
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Reid and you were more than work colleagues, you were friends. You were always talking to each other, even outside of work, using your free time for friendly dates, going to cafés, museums and anything else you'd like to do on your own but didn't dare, because leaving the house alone had been a bit of a problem since high school. And deep down you knew it was a problem for him too, not a problem but probably an inconvenience. Going out alone was always awkward for everyone, the feeling of people looking at you and wondering what they were thinking – Not that it really matters what people think, but social anxiety is a real thing.
So you and Spencer were always together, your teammates already had jokes ready when you left the bullpen together, with Morgan and Prentiss always being the first to say something they found hilarious. “Going away together again? Soon you will be living together too.” Morgan’s voice echoed through the office in a joking tone. Spencer looked at him with an annoyed face. “Yes, Derek, but better than living with you, tho.” You replied, also jokingly. The dynamic between the two of you was sibling-like and you were constantly annoyed with each other. 
“We're going to the fair to buy a pumpkin to carve.” Spencer said, packing up his things. “Halloween season is starting!” Reid loved Halloween, everyone knew that, and you loved it too, not as much as he did, but his excitement and anticipation infected you too this year. 
The Halloween season had not started yet, it was only the middle of September, but for him it was Halloween season when fall came and the pumpkins were sold. You could not count how many ghost stories Reid knew by heart that he told you over and over again. You did not really mind all the excitement, but you knew it could be overwhelming for the others. In fact, you loved his excitement at this time of year, loved watching the movies on his list even if you had already seen them all last year, loved the pumpkin-flavored things he bought, and loved the smile on his face when he saw a pile of leaves in the street. 
If you looked out of the window, you could see that the trees were beginning to look autumnal. The hot summer air had already faded away, welcoming the cold breeze and the orange paisaje he liked so much. It was nice to have fall again, to not feel hot all the time and to not see Hotch’s disapproving face when you broke the dress code a little just because it was too hot for all the formal wear. 
When your thoughts were interrupted by Spencer’s touch on your shoulder, you turned your head towards him and smiled a little. “Are you ready?” he asked with his typical face, but it was impossible not to see his excitement. “Yes, yes… Sorry. I've been thinking too much.” It was normal for you to get tangled up in your thoughts, you loved thinking to yourself. “I love this time of year.” I love seeing you like this, you meant. 
You grabbed your purse and coat and began to walk with him to the elevators. He was silent for a moment, then you smiled as he began to speak. “Did you know that the fall season used to have a completely different name? In the 12th and 13th centuries, autumn was known as ‘haerfest' in England -" You beamed at his words, because every time you walked towards the elevators, he regaled you with another fact that he had probably read one day years ago. “One of the reasons it has that name is because the full moon closest to the fall equinox is called the Harvest Moon. The other reason was that harvest time was also a time when farmers could finally reap the fruits of their sowing, resulting in an abundance of produce.” 
“Have you noticed that you tell me a different fact every time we walk this way?” You say, looking at him after pressing the elevator button.
"I'm sorry, I just wanted to–"
“No! That's not what I meant, Spence. I just think it's really nice that you always have something on the tip of your tongue. It's pretty impressive.”
Spencer's rambling never bothered you, it was so nice to hear him talk about anything, anything at all really. His voice echoed in your head every time, and you remembered the random things he said when you didn't have important things to do– sometimes when you did have important things to do. The truth was, you thought about Spencer a lot more often than you should. Probably way more than he thought of you.
“Well, I'm glad you like it then.” He said after wetting his mouth with his tongue. It was a habit, maybe a tic, but you always saw Spencer doing it. Adorable. “I have a feeling that saying facts to you is almost unconscious. It's just nice to share.”
You laughed a little, then the elevators came. You got in as usual, waited a second for Spencer, then pressed the button to the floor. Spencer practically never pressed the button, he thought there were too many people pressing and he didn't know how clean their hands were beforehand. Since he had told you that, you had a small bottle of hand sanitizer in your purse, and even before you took the bottle out of your purse, Spencer’s hand was already extended in your direction, waiting for you to put some in his hand. And you did, as always. You and he had everyday rituals that no one knew, that no one could interfere with. Just you and Spencer doing silly little things together. Like going pumpkin hunting to make incredible Halloween decorations, even though it's not even October yet.
You loved his companion, the world felt lighter every time you were together. And as always, the elevator ride was quiet, the silence that only comes when two people understand each other. And Spencer understood you and vice versa. Rambling on your walk, being silent in the elevator after your hand sanitizing ritual. It was better than all the silly little jokes Morgan or Prentiss made. And you knew that and hoped Spencer knew that too.
“I don't think I tell you often enough how much I enjoy being with you.” You commented after you exited the elevator and looked at him.
“Well, you don't have to.” He explained, turning his eyes away from you. “I think I know. In fact, I like to think you're enjoying it as much as I am.” His tone was calm and flustered. You giggled and touched his arm briefly. “I guess I do, Spence.”
The walk to the fair was so nice, the laughter and the conversations and the short break to buy coffee. You would stop every time you could at the tiny coffee shop that made the best coffee near work, and the seasonal flavors began to appear. Spencer got his usual pumpkin spice latte, you got a chai latte, which is always good, but at this time of year it was just hitting different.
The two of you spent the whole walk chatting non-stop. You felt the stares of some people when you were talking louder over excitement about something, but it did not matter when you were together.
“Originally, jack-o’-lanterns would have been carved out of potatoes, turnips and beets, but when immigrants came to America, pumpkins were more fruitful, so they became part of the tradition.” Told Spencer as you sipped your coffee and nodded your head in agreement to what he was telling you.
“I think it's easier too. Imagine having to carve something out of a turnip, it's so tiny.” You gesticulated to express how difficult it would be to make tiny faces in the little vegetable. He chuckled and his face showed pure confusion as he tried to understand the gestures, you rolled your eyes and laughed as well.
“You understood what I was doing, don't make a fool of me.”
“Yeah, I get it. All those little knives to make little faces. Really hard.”
A little further and there you were, some stalls with big vegetables and some with baked goods, toys or decorations. There were fairy lights everywhere, so your eyes hurted a little, but it was so beautiful that you could forgive the inconvenience. The way the lights reflected on Spencer’s face, in his glasses, made him look really pretty too. You felt like this moment had lodged itself in your brain like a core memory. He gave you a quick glance as he began searching through the stalls to find what he was looking for: a big ass pumpkin.
You followed him and looked at all the cool stuff that was being sold  there. All the trinkets were so interesting to you, you loved little objects that you could display in your home. It was tempting to buy them all, but unfortunately you did not. Every time you liked something, you showed it to him and he said, “You should buy it. It would look good in your house.” And you and Spencer would think about whether it was really worth it. For him, the Halloween decorations were always worth it, but you laughed and left it to save up for something greater.
“Hey, look at this!” He said, pointing to a big pumpkin, a really big one. Honestly, you shouldn't buy it, it was big and it would be a pain to get it home. But the way his face lit up when he pointed at the orange vegetable, you knew you wouldn't have the courage to say no. “Spencer, this is huge.” You said, stepping closer to him to look at the pumpkin. “Yeah, exactly. It's perfect for us.”
A few minutes later you were on your way home with the pumpkin. When your arms got tired, he carried it and when he was tired, you carried it like a little child who wants his parents. Apart from that, it was a nice walk to his apartment. You already knew the way by heart, just like he knew the way to your home and where you had hidden your key. It was only natural. You and Reid were a natural product of friendship– of love. The two things came together, but you couldn't help but wonder if this love was something more, something bigger. Whether Spencer's skin burned as much and his heart ached as much as you did. The September flush hit your face and made you shiver for a moment, in stark contrast to the feeling you had just a second ago when you thought of the possibility with him.
You were near his home now, turned the corner of the street and there you were. Spencer and you entered the building and now came to the worst part. “The stairs,” you said with a giggle, imagining yourself walking up the stairs with this thing. “That's on you, Dr. Reid.” you added, handing the pumpkin into his arms. 
“That's definitely not fair.” He whined, but he knew it was more than fair. It was his idea to buy such a large pumpkin, so it was his responsibility to carry it upstairs. “You should be glad you live on the second floor,” you laughed, touching his back to encourage him. “Let's go. You're strong.”
With some difficulty, you and Spencer got into his apartment, you took off your coat and put it in the coat rack with your bag. You went into his kitchen and searched for a large knife and all the other utensils, a bucket for the pulp and smaller knives for the details. He was prepping the floor with some old newspapers, so it would be easier to clean after. 
“Well, what face do you want to make?” You knew he'd never done the original Jack-O-Lantern face, so it must be something original, spooky and funny. “Maybe a scary cat?” He looked at you as he sat on the floor and rolled his sleeves up to his elbows. “I think we can do this, yeah.” It can't be that hard, can it? you thought. You grabbed the big knife, sat down next to him and started to slice open the lid. It was a messy part, because you had to take the lid off to remove the pulp and seeds. As you did this, Spencer drew on a piece of paper what he wanted the pumpkin to look like and showed it to you to get your approval. You kept nodding and saying it looked nice. And it did. Spencer had many talents, some people wouldn't say drawing was one of them, but you really liked the little doodles and all the things he drew. A creepy little cat face that had a strange charm.
“I love it. I might steal that for myself.” You say, admiring the drawing. Spencer smiles and looks down at his knuckles. Still today he didn't know how to deal with compliments.
It was an intimate atmosphere, you on the floor, close to him, so close that every now and then you felt your arms against his, your skin touching and radiating the hot feeling in the area. His elbow casually touches your forearm, triggering a chaos of emotions in your head. You sigh and admire him drawing on the pumpkin. Your eyes linger on the way his strands of hair fall perfectly into his face, highlighting his profile. His glasses on the tip of his nose and his slightly open mouth show how focused he was. In an unconscious moment, you move your fingers and adjust his glasses on the bridge of his nose. Spencer looks at you and giggles after wetting his mouth with the tip of his tongue. You love it when he does that. 
“Spence.” You call his name in an almost non-existent tone, so softly that he only listens because you were so close. He calls your name back in the same way. You can literally feel your breath catching and mingling with his. Feel how hot his face was, see how his glasses start to fog up. “Can I kiss you?” You say it without thinking, because your subconscious wanted this, needed this. “Y-yes. Absolutely.” Spencer's answer sounded like he wanted it as much as you did, like he was just waiting for confirmation.
And there was. The confirmation. You move eagerly to join your lips as his hand drops the pen to cup the back of your head. The kiss was gentle, just like his touch. You moved a little closer, placing your hand at his waist and tilting your head to better accommodate him. It was so much better than you had expected. Your lips met softly and tenderly and his hand held you like it was the most precious thing ever. The tip of his nose caressed your cheek and the glasses tingled against your skin in an endearing way.
You didn't want to let him go, but when your lungs demanded help, you slowly parted your lips. You both smiled while your faces were still close together. You kiss the corner of his mouth, looking at him. “I thought you'd never ask that,” he said, kissing you on the forehead.
At that moment, you realized that this kiss was only the first of countless kisses to follow that autumn night. 
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elaine19day · 27 days ago
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Alright guys, I'm here today to address the pictures of the alleged 'new merch' that had been circling around in the English fandom for a few days. See how I said 'English fandom'? Because nobody really addressed it on weibo and XHS yet… at least not to that extent. (Sorry, I have seen these screencaps on tumblr, insta, X and discord, and I have no idea who originally took them, I don't claim to have taken those screenshots, merely providing them here so you know what I'm talking about.)
So what happened? A few days ago a random shop on taobao created new listings that offered a new series of badges and prints/acrylics - not just featuring the 4 main boys, but also He Cheng, Qiu, She Li and… Cun Tou…..?! Now let's take a moment and sit back and think about this for a while. First of all: Why would a random shop that's NOT affiliated with mosspaca in any way post new 'official' merchandise? (Because we can see there's the mosspaca copyright writing on the badges and acrylics, just like it used to be on the previous badge series) Why would this random shop post these things while neither OldXian herself nor her boss, moss, have posted or announced anything via weibo/XHS? Don't you think this is sort of fishy? You don't find this strange, you don't question that at all? Sure, some people said: It's leaked and it will be available on the upcoming signing event on the 29th which OX announced on her weibo. Sure. There is a possibility, of course. They could have a leak in mosspaca studio and some person got their hands on some undisclosed merch and decided to make bank by making a new shop and listing the items for pre-order, hoping they could cash in. NOT a smart choice if you wanna keep your job because such incidents get investigated thoroughly and we all know by now that moss himself is very strict about these things and already has taken legal action against shops before when they sell fake merch as official merch. The other possibility? Old Xian's apple account has been hacked by an outsider and then the same scenario as before applies - that person wanted to cash in before it officially releases.
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Now. How has OX handled merchandise before? It was always announced before an event and sometimes even months(!) in advance when they were pre-order items. Also. Have you ever seen Old Xian making merch for Cheng, Qiu, She Li and Buzzcut? Sure, the first 3 have been on some old postcards way back in the day, plus they are depicted in some of the artbooks, okay. But actual merch with them separately? The last badge series had a very limited special edition button with He Cheng. That was super rare. And now OX suddenly makes merch of the 2 adults, plus She Li AND Buzzcut, who's a minor character which barely makes an appearance? (Sorry, Buzzcut fans, not trying to be mean, just wanting to drive home the point that OX creating merch of him is highly unlikely - unfortunately.)
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So what can we take home from all the stuff I just pointed out? Yep, there is a high chance that this is not official. It might be fake merch, sold by a random person who used generative AI tools and editing skills to create these things. I mean, sure, some of the pictures look highly convincing, I give you that. But then again, there are fanartists out there who can perfectly mimic Old Xian's style and edit/draw the boys in new poses that make it seem 'real' and official. But then there's THIS. Please take a close look at the way the faces are 'drawn', the way that the eyes are sort of smudged, same as some of the abs, the way Mo's face is contorted in a weird angle, the way the hands look chunky and unreal, and so on. (click on image to enlarge it and see it in more detail)
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Weird, right? Well, it's a very common, typical thing for pictures that are generated with free AI tools. Everyone who has tried one or the other and has fcked around with one of those tools out of curiosity will notice.
Also - have you noticed the sheer AMOUNT of things posted from this one random seller? 10 different badges, 12 different long bookmarks (acrylic boards?), 4 couple cards, plus a LOT of other random new things which all feature very old panels from the manhua… When has Old Xian ever released SO MUCH merch at once? Yep. Never. Plus the re-using of old pictures for new merch? Also doesn't make much sense. And there's a lot of the older illustrations being used for these supposed new things here.
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So if you take all of this into account, you might conclude that someone is tryna pull your leg here, selling fake merch disguised as official by even slapping the logo onto it to make it more convincing and mimicking how it looked the last time around. Of course - there might be the odd chance that mosspaca suddenly took a 180° turn and completely changed their modus operandi and decided to do things completely different compared to before and that it was leaked after all and meant as a surprise for the new autograph event etc etc etc. Yep. There's a chance that all this is true after all. But there's also a chance that I step out of my house tomorrow and an airplane crashes onto my head. Of course, that chance is *extremely* small. But the chance is there… So there you have it. All I'm asking you here, is to take a moment to think it through logically when you see these things online. And that you don't instantly believe everything that other people post who are always so eager to spread false information just for the sake of stirring up the fandom without ever taking the time to verify their sources. (No, I'm NOT taking a jab at anyone here who posted/reposted these pictures and was confused and/or asked about it. I was just as puzzled as you guys. But I am criticizing those who post it and announce that it's definitely new, official merchandise…) In conclusion: Might be true, but chances are very slim, all things considered. Let's wait until Tuesday when the event takes place and keep an eye on weibo and XHS - let's see which pictures the CN fandom will post when showing their autographs. Then you can check if there's new merch present. If not - well, then it's pretty safe to say that this was definitely fake. (And if this turns out to be real after all, I will make a follow-up post, regarding the AI-looking faces. But you might not like that 'lore' so I will not mention it for now, to prevent possible drama.)
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doyoulikethissong-poll · 3 months ago
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Adele - Rolling in the Deep 2010
"Rolling in the Deep" is a song by English singer-songwriter Adele from her second studio album, 21 (2011). It is the lead single and opening track on the album. The song was composed by Paul Epworth and Adele in a single afternoon following Adele's breakup with her boyfriend. It was her reaction to, "being told that my life was going to be boring and lonely and rubbish, and that I was a weak person if I didn't stay in the relationship. I was very insulted, and wrote that as a sort of 'fuck you'."
"Rolling in the Deep" received widespread critical acclaim with praise drawn towards the song's production, its lyrics, and Adele's vocal performance. It represented a commercial breakthrough for Adele, propelling her to global superstardom. The song topped the charts in twelve countries and reached the top 10 in over twenty territories. It was Adele's first number-one song in the US, reaching the top spot on many Billboard charts, including the Billboard Hot 100 where it was number one for seven weeks. By February 2012, "Rolling in the Deep" had sold over 8.7 million copies in the US, making it the best-selling digital song by a female artist in the US, the second-best-selling digital song in the US and Adele's best-selling single outside her native country, topping her previous best-selling "Chasing Pavements". Worldwide, it was the fifth-best-selling digital single of 2011 with sales of 8.2 million copies. As of 2019, with sales of over 20.6 million copies worldwide, "Rolling in the Deep" is one of the best-selling digital singles of all time.
Its music video received a leading seven nominations at the 2011 MTV Video Music Awards, including for Video of the Year, and won three other awards: Best Editing, Best Cinematography and Best Art Direction. "Rolling in the Deep" was also the Billboard Year End Hot 100 Number One Single of 2011. At the 54th Annual Grammy Awards, it won awards for Record of the Year, Song of the Year, and Best Short Form Music Video, making it just the second song in Grammy history to win all three awards after "We Are the World" in 1986. Various critics and music publications ranked it as the best song of the year on their end-of-year lists with Rolling Stone ranking it at number 8 spot on its list of "The 100 Greatest Songs of the 21st Century". In 2021, the song was ranked at number 82 on the list of Rolling Stone's 500 Greatest Songs of All Time.
"Rolling in the Deep" received a total of 87,7% yes votes!
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kamotecue · 9 months ago
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the one that got away ❆ l. williamson
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pairing: leah williamson x fem!reader
summary: after you had torn your acl, it was deemed that you weren't able to return to your football career. so, what happens when you pursued something different, that the one you love, ended up being the one who got away? singer!reader
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agony was what the blonde defender felt, it was the agony of losing you - the one that got away, for the english captain it was a relentless ache, the haunting melody of memories that lingers long after the music has stopped. her silent screams, the tumultuois storm of her emotions that threatens to consume every one of her thoughts and feelings. it was definitely a rollercoaster ride of emotions, the experience you both had together as a couple - the deep sense of grief and loss, the emptiness feeling that was impossible to feel, how every thought is consumed by the memories of you - how you'd both dance in the rain, her watching in amusement as you would always make blanket forts during movie nights, how she held onto you close as if you were going to disappear, and lastly, her favorite - the way she'd kiss you in private, how she showed you what it's like to be loved.
yet there it was, the winter of 2011 - you had suffered an anterior cruciate ligament injury making everything fall down, as much as you tried there was nothing that you could do. and so, you had left the football world, despite being the arsenal prodigy. a knock was heard, as you gazed at your bedroom door - the blonde defender had carefully opened the door, she looked at your eyes to see them filled with tears, knowing how this moment would change everything. your career ending injury, the one you sustained was not just a blow to your body, but a devestating blow to your dreams. you had worked so hard, sacrificed so much, to reach the pinnacle of yourcareer, only to have it all taken away in an instant.
"i won't be playing alongside you, as we thought, lee." your voice broke as you buried your face into the crook of her neck. the blonde reaching to softly rub your back, in an attempt to calm you which it did. the sniffles was heard throughout the house, yet all she could do was be there for you. it took you a while to accept circumstance, so you moved onto something else - music was the second, no third thing you loved - besides football, and the english defender. a year later, you took off into the music industry with a storm - you decided to form a band with your childhood friends, performing in sold-out stadiums, releasing a whole album - and it was even worse when the band had even gotten more famous.
in the early days, the love between you two was a bright flame, burning fiercely and passionately. but as your music career soared to unimaginable heights, the glare of fame cast a shadow over their relationship, changing everything. you had never anticipated the level of fame and scrutiny that would come with the band's success. everywhere you went, you were followed by a throng of fans and paparazzi, eager for a glimpse into your glamorous life. in which the pressure to maintain your image became suffocating, and you knew that any hint of scandal could spell disaster for your career. asmuch as you loved the blonde defender, you also knew that being seen with her in public could invite unwanted attention and speculation. that's why you couldn't bear the thought of her being surrounded by the media, or having her privacy invaded - as she loved being private. and so, with a heavy heart, you made the painful decision to push her away, thinking it was for the best.
at first, lee was confused and hurt with the way you acted, the unnesscary coldness. you tried to explain it, to make her understand the pressure you were under, but the damage had already been done, the trust between you two had been shattered, despite your best intentions - it couldn't be repaired. so as the distance between you two grew, your love began to wither and fade - the bright flame that had once burned so brightly was now nothing more than a flicker, barely illuminating the darkness that crept into the relationship. in the end, you were alone - your fame and success, a hollow comfort for the love that you'd lost. you often find yourself pondering, if you made the right choice, if pushing her away had been the only option, but deep down, you knew that the price of fame had been too high, and that you'd always regret the day that you'd let her slip away.
yet there you were, in front of her eyes - performing in front of 90,000 fans. she still loves you, and a part of her is hoping that you still do. and you do, you still do - there are countless nights were you're looking up at the hotel ceiling, a lingering ache in your heart for the love you had lost, the one that could've been yours if fate had not intervened. you'd often wondered how things could've been different if the acl injury had never happened, perhaps you would've never pursued music with such fervor, instead choosing a quieter life by her side. the lazy mornings spent in bed, tangeled in each other's embrace, and peaceful evenings watching as the sun would set, hand in hand. but reality was cruel, and the injury shattered not just your dreams but also the future you had envisioned with her. and as the final notes of your song had faded away, you closed your eyes, imagining for a brief moment that she was there in the crowd, that the blue eyes you had fallen in love with - and when you opened them, she was. a wide smile was seen on her face, as you noticed the tears in her eyes that were begging to drop, she was watching you with pride and love.
the crowd had cheered, as you looked away - greeted them with a small smile, as you bid goodbye. her eyes followed as you left the stage, a concerned look was seen throughout your bandmate's eyes. the crowd began to leave, one by one - yet a dazed look was shown on her face, you saw her, yet you haven't made the effort to do anything. maybe you shouldn't, maybe you couldn't or maybe you didn't have to.
"come on, lee - the concert is done." beth, her club and national teammate said, as a soft sigh was heard. she didn't notice a tour staff had walked her way. you had given orders to invite her teammate's backstage. the defender had only looked up when she took note of the unfamiliar ones, her eyes locked onto someone in uniform, the lanyard confirming that she worked for, or with you.
"ms. williamson, i presume? i was ordered to give you these backstage passes, as well as to escort you backstage." the worker said, as her eyes gazed to the passes in her hands, beth and a few others, their eyes had widened in shock. she slowly stood up before nodding to the girl, as every step began to feel a bit heavy for the defender, you walked back in forth in your changing room - wondering if it was the right choice.
it was, as the team had been led backstage, leah had caught the eyes of your three childhood best friends - people that she also knows, as she formed a friendship with the trio while you were dating. an amused look was seen on oliver's face, as he stood up to greet the team.
"never thought i'd see you again, lee." oliver's charming voice was heard, catching the eyes of his two other bandmate's "childhood friends". a soft smile was shown on archie's and adeline's face.
"neither did i" the english captain's voice was calm, gaining the attention of oliver who softly hummed.
"we've missed you, but she misses you more." oliver replied, he gazed at your dressing room door - it opened, revealing you.
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bruhnze · 4 months ago
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The promise of a ring? - Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle
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Writing for asks about a ring-fic like this one and this one.
Summary: Ona thinks her life with Lucy is perfect and wants to grow old together.
Warnings: SMUT, minors dni. A teeny tiny bit of angst. They are in love, in love, so headsup for sappy behavior. A bit of degrading, so don't read this if that's not your cup of tea. deffo dont read the second half if you're not into smut xx
Wordcount: 8k
I got a bit carried away while writing this lol.
Side note for fun: i recommend keeping Ona's english/spanish accent in mind when reading her parts because i had just watched old man united interviews from her when i wrote this and i think she had a cute accent then (still, but her english got better).
not really proofread :)
The promise of a ring?
It was February, the month Lucy and Ona would be celebrating their one year anniversary. This time last year Lucy had asked Ona to be her partner and Ona had been nothing but happy ever since. After having a little crush on the English woman for a big part of her life, but never having thought about it much further then that, it had been a pleasant surprise when she’d been hit on by Lucy at a wedding she attended. Ofcourse, she had tried to look her very best that night, knowing that the taller defender would be there, but she hadn’t seriously considered that she could’ve ended up in her bed. But after a long night of subtle flirting and flirtatious dances, she had. The sex had been so good that Lucy and her stayed connected and had a couple dozen more encounters like that after the infamous wedding night.
Over time Ona was surprised to see Lucy fall in love with her just as much as she did with the English woman and the booty calls changed in to just hanging out together, changed in to dates and eventually Lucy had proposed the idea of dating. Combined with the fact she was moving back to Barcelona soon, Ona had been over the moon.
She enjoyed playing with Lucy for the club she loved, she loved living with Lucy and their two dogs and nothing in her live could be better. Lucy put in so much effort to learn her languages, get on with her friends and family and even helped her out with football, analyzing games together.
Ona felt the luckiest woman alive with the way Lucy would tell her again and again how beautiful she was and never stopped reminding her about just how much she loved the Catalan woman, even saying that her vague dream of living in Barcelona after her retirement became clearer and clearer every day she woke up next to Ona.
All of these things and many more combined had driven Ona to this idea. During one of the moments when they had time for a date and were strolling through Barcelona, ​​Ona had pulled Lucy into a nice antique shop.
She pretended that it was completely out of the blue and that she just thought it was a nice shop but secretly she had a hidden agenda. It was a shop that also sold jewelry and Ona was curious about Lucy's taste in rings.
They had casually looked at everything and by chance Lucy had pointed out the 'chunky' gold rings that she also liked as nice jewelry.
Ona had said that she liked them too and Lucy had suggested to buy them ''we can match, look there are two''.
She had pretended to think about it and then had waved it off as something they needed to think about and maybe they could do some time in the future.
Lucy hadn't noticed, Ona could make Lucy believe anything. With her big twinkling eyes and a simple touch, the Catalan could make her forget everything.
After looking at more shops, such as a candle shop, where they bought a big, lovely smelling candle, they walked a bit through the city before finding a quiet restaurant for dinner.
''Next week is our official one year of dating, did you know that babe'' Lucy said between her bites.
Ona laughed, so she wasn't the only one who was thinking about that ''mhm, ofcourse, I already have my present''.
One of Lucy's eyebrows flew up ''presents? I didn't know we were going to do that''.
The shorter woman was a little disappointed but she didn't really care, Lucy gave her presents often enough ''just being in a relationship with you is already a present Luce, you don't have to give anything, I just happened to come across something, that's why I’ve got something'' Ona said reassuringly.
Lucy grinned ''you're so cute, I was teasing you a little, of course I have something, well, I'm working on it''.
''I'm curious'' Ona said biting her lip ''but let's stop talking about this topic because it was hard enough keeping it a secret''.
''great idea'' Lucy agreed, because I’m sure I’ll tell you everything if you’d ask me ‘’but I did want to talk about what you wanted to do, because our schedule is a bit tight I thought we could celebrate a day earlier and go to that one nice restaurant with the waiter that slipped as a date?’’.
"I find it so funny that you keep calling it that, but yes, I would like to, but you have to make a reservation, right?" Ona chuckled.
‘’Already done’’ Lucy said confidently, "reserved three months ago, when our schedule was known, figured that day would be the best one as the day after our real anniversary we have to get up really early".
‘’Ah and you are planning to make it late?’’ Ona asked teasingly.
"Well, when you go out to eat it often gets late," Lucy said nonchalantly.
The Catalan blushed and rolled her eyes at the way how Lucy got her to say things like that and then acted like she was the one insinuating something.
She could already see Lucy's smug grin and hated herself for falling for it again and again. How it often went was that Lucy would deny that she meant anything by the first ambiguous statement, then she would ask what Ona meant by what she had said, and Ona would be left floundering and blushing.
Just like now: ‘’what were you thinking about then bonita?’’.
But Ona recovered herself and cleared her throat, not willing to give in ''oh, I just thought about if we were just going out for dinner or if you were thinking about having like a long dinner and drinks after that, because I'm all for eating and then going home, given our busy schedule of course''.
Lucy narrowed her eyes suspiciously ‘’mkay, and yeah just dinner and then head back home, just thought dinner there would be cute for our one year celebration and because you like their food a lot’’.
Ona nodded eagerly ‘’yeah I love it, I love that you made a reservation for us there’’.
The next day they had a whole day working at the club, when it was time to eat lunch with everyone Ona slipped away and drove her car to the antique shop, hoping the rings would still be there, but she was quite sure they’d be, as she had kept her eye on them for a while now.
Just as she parked her phone rang, and she saw it was Lucy and was shocked, only now realizing that of course she would be looking for her at lunch.
She denied the call and quickly texted her that she would be there soon, as she was talking to someone in the physio building.
Lucy replied that she just came from that building and hadn’t seen her, but agreed to see her in the dining hall soon.
Ona basically sprinted to the store.
‘’hi I’d like to buy the two golden rings from that display case’’ she said when she’d found the worker, when the old man had gotten them out of the glass cabinet Ona had told their sizes.
she found out that the rings were both exactly Lucy's size and therefore just a little too big for her, the man asked which one he could adjust for her, after thinking for a moment she wanted to keep the ring with the waves for Lucy, since her name means 'wave' in Catalan that would be a nice memorial, so the other one was for her.
''I can do it now, it will take about an hour'' the man said.
''uhm I have to go, but can I maybe pick them up tonight?'' Ona asked while she paid.
''I don't have the shop open in the evening'' the man said kindly ''but I live upstairs, so if you ring the bell I will make an exception for you''.
''thank you sir, that is very kind of you'' Ona said happily when she accepted the receipt and discussed the time she would be there that evening.
Just as she sat back in the car and had put the receipt in her wallet she got called again, the old man and her had chatted for a second longer before she had finally gotten back outside, without thinking it through she accepted the call.
‘’I don’t understand where you are’’ Lucy sighed in to her phone ‘’which room did you say you were?’’.
‘’o-oh h-hi Luce, I’m- I hadn’t said which room, I only said the physio building’’ Ona said uncertain as she quickly drove off.
‘’what am I hearing? are you in a car?’’ Lucy asked surprised, ‘’I wanted to look for you, to get lunch together, but I can’t find you’’.
Ona groaned ‘’I told you to just wait in the dining hall’’.
‘’What is going on, did you leave the training ground? Is this why you didn’t want to take that ice bath with me earlier?’’.
‘’Luce, don’t ask me questions, we have an hour to lunch, go eat, I’ll join you soon’’ Ona said as someone honked behind her to tell her that the light was green already.
‘’mierda’’ Ona muttered as traffic had the effect of annoying her badly.
‘’mkay’’ Lucy said suspicious ‘’I’ll get an explanation when I see you, drive safe’’.
‘’love you’’ Ona mumbled.
‘’I love you too chica loco’’.
Ona parked in the same spot where she had left the car that morning and was surprised to see Lucy standing in front of her. As she got out of the car she looked in to the surprised eyes of her English girlfriend ‘’uhhhmmm, I wanted to clear my head’’ Ona offered.
‘’oh’’ Lucy said surprised and she frowned ‘’Are you allright? What was on your mind then?’’.
Ona smiled ‘’yeah I’m good, really’’ she chuckled as she hugged Lucy ‘’let’s get some food quickly’’.
‘’You’re acting a bit weird, you sure you’re okay?’’ Lucy asked carefully as they broke their hug and started walking back to the dining hall.
Their return together apparently motivated everyone to joke about how Lucy and Ona must have already provided another lunch and something about broom closets, but Lucy couldn't really laugh about it. She was worried that Ona had wanted to clear her head by going for a drive while she didn't even know Ona was worried about anything, she thought their lives were going perfectly.
The pair was back at home, they had taken a nap, cooked dinner and were now eating dinner.
‘’I am going to walk the dogs after dinner’’ Ona said as she dished up some more food for herself.
 ‘’ofcourse, when I have done the dishes we can go’’. Lucy said as she nodded.
Ona chuckled ‘’no Luce, I’m going on my own’’.
Lucy stopped chewing and looked up to search Ona’s face ‘’but we always go together?’’ she quietly said.
‘’I know, but I wanted to do it alone tonight’’ Ona said smiling ‘’when I’m back we can hangout again’’.
‘’do you need more alone time? Or is something else wrong?’’ Lucy asked concerned.
Only now did it dawn on Ona that this must have seemed strange to Lucy, she didn't want her to think that something was wrong. ''No no no Luce, it is really nothing, don't read in to it, I promise, I love that we can do everything together and that we live together''.
‘’Would you tell me if there’s something wrong?’’.
‘’Yes Luce’’ Ona smiled as she took Lucy’s hand ‘’ofcourse, and I will tell you what this afternoon was about too one day okay, and I promise you will laugh about it, because I already am’’.
‘’you’re speaking in riddles’’ Lucy groaned.
‘’I know, just be patient mkay?’’ Ona said cheeky ‘’but I assure you there is nothing wrong with me’’.
Lucy smiled ‘’so you weren’t avoiding me?’’.
‘’huh’’ Ona tilted her head ‘’not at all, I would never avoid you, as a matter of fact, I missed you today’’.
‘’I missed you too’’ ‘’are you sure you need to walk alone?’’ Lucy asked quietly with a sheepish grin ‘’I can just keep quiet?’’.
Ona laughed ‘’I am sure babe’’, ‘’I’ll go walking alone and if you cleaned it up here when I got back I’ll give you a reward, how does that sound?’’.
‘’Is it about the messy apartment?’’
The Catalan rolled her eyes ‘’nahh Luce and stop guessing cause you won’t get it, now do you want some kisses tonight or not?’’.
‘’would I not get them if I don’t clean?’’ Lucy challenged playfully.
‘’ugh’’ Ona rolled her eyes ‘’you would because I wanted to anyways, but I’d give them with more pleasure if you’d tidied up our house’’.
‘’How about more then just kisses, I mean with inflation cleaning costs have gone up big time’’ Lucy said as she shrugged.
‘’we’ll see how well you cleaned up’’ Ona decided with a grin.
‘’Blackmailing me to clean for sex’’ Lucy groaned ‘’genius, I should’ve thought about this myself’’.
‘’nuh-uh, I claimed this tactic, you cannot use it, I have copyrights on it actually’’ Ona chuckled as she took her plate and cutlery to put in the dishwasher.
Lucy followed her with her own dishes and the glasses ‘’we’ll see’’ she whispered as she passed Ona.
It was a pretty long walk to the store but all had worked out as planned and Ona snuck back in the apartment and saw the hall was pretty tidy, all the shoes were put in the closet instead of scattered around the floor like before.
As she heard Lucy come walking to her she quickly put the present in one of the shoes in the shoe closet and bowed to untie her shoes as she happily said ´´wow very clean´´.
´´Well you gave me plenty time´´ Lucy said as she unleashed the dogs and put them away.
The dogs waddled to the living room as Ona put her shoes away and stepped closer to Lucy ´´Now i´m all yours´´.
´´hmm´´ Lucy said as she pressed herself against Ona ‘’until she wonders of again’’.
Ona chuckled ‘’but I will always vuelve a ti, always’’ (come back to you).
Lucy buried her head in Ona’s neck and took in her scent ‘’I love the sound of that, and I’ll always be here for you to come to’’.
‘’always?’’. Ona asked happily.
Lucy held herself back from Ona ​​so she could look at her, "always," she said determinedly.
It was thursday that following week, after a day of working they'd gone home and walked the dogs. This morning Lucy had made Ona breakfast in bed, but for more than that hadn't been time.
Now they were stood infront of the closet together.
"What are you wearing?" Ona asked.
Lucy rumaged through the closet "hm, think this white blouse".
Ona looked through her options aswell and opted for something cute that went well with Lucy's outfit, casual but dressed up.
"You look so pretty" lucy said from her place sitting on the bed, as she was putting her jeans on.
Ona chuckled "i am naked".
"Mhmm" Lucy hummed, beckoning "my favourite outfit of yours".
"Shut up" Ona said laughing, "black or red?".
"None".
Ona grinned "hm, maybe I'll put on my granny underwear".
Lucy rolled her eyes "okay then, eventhough in my opinion you pull everything off equally beautiful i'll choose red this time".
"Hm, im surprised you didn't choose the granny ones".
"Ohhh" Lucy acted stupid "Do you not have those in red, might have to go with black then".
As she was chuckling Ona pulled some little set of red lingerie out of her underwear drawer and put it on.
She always felt comfortable in her body, sunbathing topless, skinny dipping, etcetera, but in her own home she felt the best, and Lucy, her girlfriend, always made her feel great sure sometimes Lucy would come on to her, touch her or make some insinuating jokes, but it was alway lighthearted or when it was not, and it was a bit more intens, it always came in a moment Ona was up for it. She didnt know how Lucy did it, maybe it was the way her eyes always had love in them next to the hunger and lust, or the way she was so tactfull, but Ona never felt objectified. But she knew how to really awaken that hunger in Lucy's eyes, was to wear a nice set of lingerie that bearly covered anything. Lucy had once told her that it reminded her of a bow around a present, that if Ona put it on, she'd have done it with the thought of Lucy 'unwrapping' her later. So Ona thought, it only made sense to wear a nice pair on a special day like this.
Lucy was now completely dressed and still sat on the edge of the bed, Ona walked to the stack of clothes she'd put next to her and smiled when she saw Lucy's eyes roaming her body.
"You like it?".
Lucy nodded and looked back up to Ona "you're so unbelievebly beautiful Ona, i cant believe i get to be your girlfriend".
Ona chuckled as she grabbed her pants to put on.
Lucy sight "i don't think i want to go to dinner anymore".
"I think you should come, because i don't want to eat alone, and what if someone hits on me" Ona joked.
"Ew" lucy narrowed her eyes "i meant that we'd both be staying at home" she grabbed Ona closer to her with two hands and kissed her stomach.
Ona leaned over Lucy to grab her top as she was laughing "No i have to give you my present over dinner''.
The English woman pushed her girlfriend aside as she suddenly remembered her own present and shot up ''i almost forgot!''.
Ona staid in the room as she finished dressing up and when she went te the bathroom to apply some make-up, the older woman came bursting back in to the room ''i wanted to give you it before dinner''.
The Catalan looked in to the mirror to see Lucy approaching her behind her and chuckled as she saw her carrying a bouquet of flowers and a kind of notebook, ''huh, how did you get flowers i didn't even see you get those?''.
''Got them yesterday'' Lucy smirked ''hid them somewhere, i'm glad they're still alive tho, i actually wanted to give them to you this morning''.
Ona turned around ´´they´re pretty, and what´s that´´, she asked pointing at the booklet.
´´Okay so imagine your back at this morning, i made you breakfast in bed and then i handed you this´´ Lucy said while handing Ona the present and laying the bouquet next to the sink ´´go on, flip through it´´, Lucy encouraged.
The Catalan looked amazed at the cover, it was a picture of them both on a holiday, a day she remembered all to well, they had had so much fun spending those off-days together after the worldcup.
She opened it and saw every page with a different photo and a different writting text ''did you make this?''. she asked Lucy amazed.
''I know it's a bit corny but, yeah''. Lucy said quietly as she suddenly got a bit insecure.
In the booklet Lucy had put some of her favourite pictures from some of her favourite memories together and with every pictures she had written a little joke, something she remembered from that day or why she loved that picture.
At the end, the last page, Ona stopped, she didn't see a picture on this page, the whole page was scribbled full with text and it was signed -
from: Lucy, for: Ona, the love of my life.
Ona's eyes quickly scanned the pages and to her surprise it was all written in Catalan, which made it easy for her to read fast. Her eyes watered as she read the loving words and promises in her mothertongue.
When she read ''I quan arribi l'instant perfecte, et suplicaré que em facis el més afortunat del món'' (and when the time is right i will ask you to make me the luckiest) a tear rolled down her cheek ''Luce, it's so beautiful''.
Lucy cupped her face ''i don't know if i got it all translated right but i have the English version for you aswell if y-
''-It's perfect, it's like a Catalan poet wrote it'' Ona smiled ''i didn't know i could fall in love with you more''.
The English woman smiled ''glad you like it, i'm curious about yours now''.
''Oh yes, i'll give it to you right now, how long do we have before we need to go?''.
Lucy looked at her watch ''about 20 minutes, why?''. ''you can still give it to me over dinner, i just- , we can't have a booklet with a kiss photo of us out in public and the flowers were a practical matter''.
''Oh'' Ona said mischievious ''I hadn't planned on giving you my present over dinner either'' she thought to herself and said ''i can't offer you a ring in public'' while shaking her head and chuckling.
''A ring? did you just give away your present?'' Lucy chuckled as Ona walked around her to leave the bathroom.
''Huh oh! see i'm so bad at keeping secrets, but i guess it's more like a promise'' Ona said while she groaned at herself internally, she had prepared a whole speech, just as romantic as Lucy, not just -here a ring-.
''The promise of a ring?'' Lucy asked confused.
Ona chuckled ''i would say a ring with a promise''. ''i'll be right back''.
She came back with a folded up note, and the leather pouch that the man had put the rings in. She was a little nervous and Lucy noticed ''you're trembling Ona, it's just me remember''. she said as she guided them back to the bedroom ''let's sit on the bed bub''.
''mhm'' Ona nodded ''can i sit on your lap?''.
''Ofcourse'' Lucy smiled ''you don't even have to ask, you know that right''.
''I know'' said as she took place on her lover and leaned her head to Lucy's shoulder ''i'm a little nervous, but it's pretty similar to what you wrote so i don't know why i am''. ''i'll just read it off my note, bé?''.
''Sí, continuar querida'' Lucy said while running her hand suiting along Ona's back ''it will be perfect''.
Ona looked up and smiled at Lucy ''i just realise i wrote it for you in English, you wrote Catalan for me'' she said and kissed Lucy.
After that Ona read her note out loud and showed the rings, she also told how she had chosen the waves for Lucy and ended with the story about what had happened last week, why she went on a drive and a walk with the dogs alone. Telling her she hadn't even thought about making an excuse and that's why she had been so weird about it, but chuckling at herself how un-planned she had gone about it all.
Lucy had laughed with her and told her she was glad that it had been about the present, because she had worried a bit about it at the time.
Ona kissed Lucy tenderly, a kiss out of pure love ''tots dos volem viure junts per sempre'', she whispered in Lucy's ear ''and I want to put a ring on your finger as tangible proof of that''.
She opened the pouch and put her own ring on before she looked up to Lucy ''in Catalunya it's normal to wear a wedding ring on the left hand, the hand closest to the heart, and the promise ring on the right, but i believe it is the other way around in England''.
Lucy grinned ''i'll put it on the right, like you, they can think i'm married, i don't care, it is our thing''.
''We can wear it to think about eachother''. Ona slid the ring onto her lovers finger ''if we miss eachother''.
''It is perfect'' Lucy cooed as she traced her finger along the engraved waves ''Ona'' she said determined as felt the ring around her finger.
''Hm?''.
''Oh, the name of my future wife, it's Ona''. Lucy stated as if she was talking to someone else ''she is the love of my life and one day i'll marry her''.
The Catalan smiled ''when the time is right''.
''When the time is right'' Lucy agreed.
They got to the restaurant just in time for their reservation and as the evening went on they ate great food and even drank a glass of wine both, despite being in the middle of the season, because of the special occasion.
Ona noticed Lucy glancing at her hand a lot during the night and chuckled when she once again took a long look at the ring Ona had gifted her.
''Stay like this'' she demanded.
Lucy looked up surprised at her as she pulled her phone out.
''Look at your hand again, it looks pretty'', encouraged Ona her as she opened the camera app.
She smiled at her phone when she had taken the picture and opened it in the camera roll, and put a black and white filter on it. She was happy with the result and handed the phone to Lucy, ''muy hermosa, look''.
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Lucy looked at the photo and chuckled ''i like your present a lot it seems, am i really that obvious''.
''Sí, you have a face that is readable like a book for kindergartners''. Ona chuckled back, ''but i love that about you''.
..
They didn't get back home too late as Lucy payed for the bill pretty soon after they were done eating.
Stepping out of the elevator Lucy opened her jacket and got her key out of her purse "you know the reason why I didn't want to make it too late?".  
Ona smirked back at her "hmm I don't know, tell me".  
She grinned and opened the door.
When they were both inside Lucy thumbed at the bottom lip of the Catalans mouth, "I want to take my time with you tonight".
Ona gulped, in this busy time of the season, just after the new-years break, they had had a lot going on. More training to get everyone on track again, media things, games, etcetera and that had led to a trend of quickies. That was a sad reality in comparison to their usual intimate marathons, like when they had been away for couple of days over Christmas.
Within these busy couple of weeks it had been a frequent thought of Ona's to have good sex again. Well, she wouldn't actually say it like that, because Lucy could do a lot in a few, undisturbed, minutes, but she sure did miss the way Lucy could make her feel, or rather make her cum again and again, when they’d got the time.
Ona smiled and pressed a couple of light kisses to the thumb before taking it in her mouth.
"Fuck" Lucy said under a heavy breath as the smaller woman sucked on her thumb and looked up her with those big submissive eyes, to preform that ‘fuck-me’ look she could put on.
Ona removed herself from the thumb with a pop ´´trobo a faltar la teva polla´´ (i miss your cock) she said, as she met Lucy's gaze before taking the digit back on her tongue.
The English woman groaned as she pressed her body closer to Ona's and turned her gaze back to her mouth ‘’ofcourse you do .. my little fuck doll’’ she growled before removing her thumb and pressing her mouth against the shorter woman’s lips.
A hungry kiss was shared while they both tried to undo themselves from their coats. Ona was the first to drop hers to the floor and her hands quickly found Lucy to tug at hers.
Lucy broke the kiss with a grin ''what's the rush?''.
The Catalan rolled her eyes ''Luce, vamos, la cama, now please''. (come on, let's go to the bed). she demanded.
The taller woman’s smirk grew, she tutted and shook her head slightly ''has it been so long that you forgot your manners? you're acting a bit like a slut, aren't ya?''.
Ona blushed but before she could respond Lucy was biting down her neck lightly and groaned against her skin ''lets get to the bedroom then''.
She nodded and as Lucy stepped away she automatically reached for a hand, tugging her along to the bedroom.
Once they were there she didn't waste time before undressing down to her underwear and looked up to Lucy expectantly.
''Sad we have to take these off'' Lucy said as she fiddled the golden ring she had already grew to love this evening.
Ona quickly took hers of and put it on the nightstand before reaching out her hand to take Lucy's rings.
''So fucking eager''.
''I missed you'' Ona offered as explanation.
After she had put Lucy's rings down safely as well, she stepped back to Lucy and tugged on her blouse. ''hmh'' Lucy smirked as she caught Ona's wrists ''you just said something else, hm, that you missed my cock’’. ‘’you missed getting fucked properly, hm?''.
''By you'' Ona tried to coax Lucy to get on with it ''please Luce, can I undress you?'' she pouted.
Lucy shook her head but smiled ''mkay, because you asked so nicely''.
Ona watched closely as she undressed Lucy, she had seen her naked a thousand times, maybe even more, but she was still as obsessed with it as the first day she laid eyes on the undressed older woman.
The way her muscles were so defined, those rock solid, slightly uneven abs, which she had been allowed to ride a few times. The way Lucy's arms literally looked sculpted and looked so damn good when she was training in her sleeveless training top, claiming it was for a more even tan. Yes, Ona could look at Lucy for days.
And right now, as she had taken off Lucy's blouse and shirt, as she felt the hard stomach below her knuckles and she unbuttoned her jeans. It drove her crazy all over again.
When Lucy stepped out of the pants Ona bent to help her caught ankle get out of the trouser leg. Her face was so close to Lucy's core that she could smell her arousal. Ona couldn’t help herself and dropped to her knees to kiss along Lucy's thighs ''quiero comerte'' she groaned as she hooked her fingers in Lucy's briefs ''is okay?''.
Lucy groaned, she nodded at the woman kneeled below her and stepped out of her underwear when Ona had taken it off.
The way Ona's English progressively got worse as she got more turned on always amazed Lucy. How Ona could get lost in the lust, the way she would look so pretty and satisfied as Lucy gave her what she needed,. but right now it seemed as though Ona had other ideas.
Lucy stilled as she felt two digits tracing her center ''Ona'' she gasped unprepared.
''No?'' Ona blinked at Lucy innocently ''mi lengua primero?'' (you want my tongue first?)
Lucy's eyes rolled back and she grabbed Ona's hair in a fist ''fuck Ona, do whatever you want''. she gasped and thought -this woman is going to be the dead of me-, as she felt Ona working her way to her core.
Ona completely gave in to her instincts and buried herself deep between her lover's legs, wiggling herself on her knees between Lucy's legs so that they spread further apart, giving her even better access.
After a while, an embarrassingly short while, whilst Ona's hands were firmly kneading the flesh of her ass, Lucy came. The orgasm washed over her quickly, catching her off guard and she couldn't stop her legs from clamping around Ona's head.
Ona didn't budge, it seemed that her hunger was not satisfied, but rather only further fueled.
When Lucy couldn't take it anymore, she gently removed her hand from Ona's hair, who took the hint and leaned back.
''Fuck that was good'' Lucy breathed with a small smile and saw Ona looking at her with twinkling eyes, but the most striking part of the small face looking up at her, were her chin and mouth glistening with her own wetness.
With the back of her hand, Ona wiped it away. Lucy didn't know why but this simple act made her knees buckle, but it did.
''I was so good, no?'' Ona asked.
Lucy smiled ''very good'' she said as she helped Ona up.
Ona immediately went in for a kiss, wanting desperately a relief of her own.
The taller woman gently broke the kiss chuckling ''Ona, nadó .. calma''. ''take it easy, i'm yours forever, remember?''.
Ona nodded and walked to their drawer to get the strap she wanted and a harness, ''we can go more slowly all those days'' she said as she handed Lucy the strap and kneeled with the harness to help Lucy in it.
When the harness was fixed she stood up her tiptoes to whisper in Lucy's ear ''but for now not slowly''.
Lucy swallowed hard and could feel her nipples harden from arousal. "How do you want me then''.
Ona raised an eyebrow, "my choice?" her mouth twisted into a smile, "then you know what I choose."
"Mhm, get on the bed".
The Catalan's smile did not leave her face, she loved to get fucked on all fours, it was her favorite position. How their thighs would feel gritting against eachother, the way her butt was pointed upwards, ready for Lucy to spank. But this position asked the most of Lucy's knees, so usually when they'd do it, Ona would end up on the edge of the bed so Lucy could stand. However, in Ona's opinion nothing could beat the way Lucy felt behind her when they were both on their knees.
Lucy shuffled behind Ona, who was now on her elbows and knees. She put two fingers in her mouth before tracing Ona's lips with them. She groaned "so fucking wet".
Ona muttered something incoherent and wiggled her ass a little, pressing it deeper against Lucy's digits.
Slowly the older woman worked her two fingers in, she saw Ona arch infront of her and groaned at the tightness of her hole.
It had probably been three weeks since they'd last used the strap, just simply because there hadn't been time to do so, or they had been to tired. Lucy had missed it, she loved watching her girlfriend take her rubber cock, but she knew Ona had probably missed it even more. Lucy could only love her girlfriend for it, they had great sex, their dynamics worked out perfectly and she was happy to answer all Ona’s needs.
The English woman grinned when she felt Ona trying to clench around her fingers, she knew the Catalan wanted more.
Ona whined "Luce" she pushed herself even more into Lucy "more".
Lucy smacked one of her ass cheeks, it landed a bit awkward because it was left-handed, but there was definitely an impact. "manners baby".
A moan escaped Ona's throat "please fuck me Luce".
Another crack-sound filled the room and Lucy removed her fingers from Ona to wipe the wetness along her strap.
She guided the tip along Ona's slit "thats a good girl’’. ‘’I know I thought you well, haven't I".
‘’Mhm’’ Ona nodded eager, but quickly corrected herself ‘’y-yes Lucy’’.
With that Lucy pushed herself inside, holding Ona’s hips as she bottomed out.
The Catalan let her head drop and closed her eyes to take it all in, and fuck did it feel good. When she noticed Lucy stayed still she took it upon herself to start moving.
Lucy had wanted to give her some time to get used to it but when she saw Ona grinding back down on her - a smirk clad her face. She released her grip on Ona’s hips and ran one hand along her back to hold her shoulder, giving her more leverage. With the other hand she reached for Ona’s thigh and forced her a little wider.
‘’Feels good hm?’’ Lucy asked through gritted teeth as she saw the smaller woman’s head cock back up.  
With another deep thrust Ona’s answered with a high-pitched moan.
Lucy reached around to roll Ona’s nipples between her fingers, ‘’does it not?’’ she asked mischievously before pinching the nipple she held.
A cry escaped Ona’s throat ‘’Sí .. Lucy’’ she muttered ‘’so good’’.
After Lucy had cupped the breast tenderly once more, her hand moved south along her stomach, ending between her legs, she gathered some slick and gently started caressing her clit.
This stimulation combined with the constant, deep, thrusts into her, got Ona being louder and louder.
It wasn't long before Ona moaned out her girlfriends name, ''Lu-‘’ she gasped  ‘’I-I m coming''.
''Good girl''. Lucy groaned ''cum for me''. ''come on my cock''.
Lucy felt the shorter woman convulsing around her rubber lengthiness, making it hard for her to keep thrusting at the same pace.
With a couple of seconds a loud groaning cry filled the room and Ona collapsed against the bed as her arms gave out on her.
Lucy held the lower part of her body up as she gently worked her through her orgasm, before releasing her hold and pulling out, helping Ona carefully collapse on to the bed completely.
The English woman dropped on her side besides Ona and started soothing the skin on her back, feeling the clampy skin of Ona's back beneath her fingertips she smiled and leaned over to kiss her neck softly, nudging Ona to face her.
The Catalan let out a soft groan as she shifted ‘’T'estimo’’ (I love you) she said as she draped herself over her older girlfriend.
Lucy chuckled ‘’I love you too my little bonita’’.
They shared a kiss before Ona climbed on top of Lucy without breaking their lips apart.
‘’Again huh?’’. Lucy smirked.
Ona shifted until she sat up on Lucy’s hips ‘’Sí, my favorit first, now your favorit one´´.
´´I have multiple favorites´´. Lucy said with a smug grin as she sat up to face Ona.
A small frown clouded her forehead ´´like this, no?’’. she asked with a small smile as she sat on Lucy's lap and they held each other in a close embrace.
‘’Yes I love holding you close to me’’ Lucy cooed as she pulled Ona in closer, helping her grind against her ‘’are you sure you’re ready to go again already?’’ she asked thoughtfully.
The Catalan grinned and kissed her.
While they made out Ona reached between them and sat up a bit before gently lowering herself back on the strap. She whimpered at the familiar intrusion.
For a while they just sat there together, sharing gentle, loving kisses.
Eventually they broke away and caught eachothers eyes, the smaller woman reached around Lucy to unclasp her bra, she had a little bit of a hard time getting it off because their bodies were so close together but eventually Lucy threw it next to the bed.
This movement sent a shiver running down Ona's spine and got her sensitive cunt clamping around Lucy's cock, she buried her face in the English´ neck as she felt the strong hands around her thighs, helping her up and down the shaft.
´´So good baby´´ Lucy said as she redirected one of her hands to Ona´s back, helping her grind back and forth a bit more rather then just up and down.
Again Ona got louder as she felt her second orgasm this evening build up. She grabbed Lucy to hold herself up and began riding her faster.
´´Fuck´´ Lucy whimpered as she got grinded down on just right ´´ready for my other favorite?’’.
Ona moaned as she got flipped over by the taller woman, putting her on her back on the bed.
With rhythmic thrusts, Lucy fucked keeping a steady pace.
Ona wrapped her legs around Lucy and the Englishwoman leaned down to take a breast into her mouth.
The Catalan dropped her head on the pillow at the way Lucy's tongue twisted around her erected nipple.
After ambushing both nipples Lucy removed her mouth from Ona and panted for air, all while not haltering her pace once.
Ona removed her hands from Lucy's shoulders to continue stimulating her nipples herself.
Lucy shifted her weight to one arm as she reached down with the other, to rub Ona's clit.
"Joder" Ona muttered as her eyes screwed shut and she arched of the bed.
"That's it baby, you're taking me so well" Lucy said breathlessly.
The Catalan's hands clenched the skin of her chest and she moaned loudly as she came.
As the English woman felt the Spaniards legs tremble around her she slowed her pace, both with her hand as with her hips.
When Ona pushed her hands against Lucy's chest, indicating it got to much, she retracted.
She grabbed Ona's calves and gently forced her spasming legs apart so she could move back on the bed a little.
As she had removed the strap from her harness and dropped it besides the bed, came closer to Ona again and softly started running her hands along her inner thighs.
When her legs slowly became less shaky a smile crept on Lucy's face.
Ona watched her with a blissfull expression and couldn't even roll her eyes or pretend to be annoyed by the smugness of her girlfriend, instead she mirrored the soft smile and reached out for one of Lucy's hands.
"That was so good" Ona said, being the first to break the thick silence.
Lucy chuckled in awe "baby you were shaking".
"It felt really good" Ona said tracing her fingers over Lucy's stomach "i chose the best person to be with for forever".
Lucy chuckled "good sex is all it takes hm?".
"No" Ona grinned "but it gives bonus points".
Lucy groaned "you know i always want to score the most points" she said before lowering herself on top of Ona and littering her with kisses.
"Lucy" Ona gasped "i can't" she said as Lucy headed towards her centre.
"I'll be so gentle" Lucy murmured against the inside of Ona's thigh "i want to taste you".
..
After a couple of hours Ona was laying in a bath Lucy had ran for her.
She had protested when Lucy had left her but she had calmed down when the English defender had said she would join right after changing the sheets.
Lucy walked in to the bathroom carying two bottles of water and a bowl with strawberrys, grapes and pineapple.
She took the wooden plank that was standing against the bathroom wall and placed it on the bath, before taking the bottles and bowl from the sink and placing them on it.
Ona was smiling at the acts of her thoughtfull girlfriend "i am so in love with you Luce".
Lucy looked up and met the two loving eyes that followed her "me too Ona, and i really really love our rings, their beautiful, especially with the promise that's behind them".
"Kiss me?" Ona asked reaching out for the older woman.
"Always".
----
The end, not theirs :)
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