#already found one oh my god he was born july 4th not september

[wolfsnis]

Clover (7/4/09-6/28/24)

I had to put down my beloved cat Clover yesterday. He was about a week shy of his 15th birthday.

He had been having "teeth issues" about two years now, but hindsight is 20/20 and it was probably the cancer growing in his jaw all along. But we didn't know until this year, in April. Then he got some badly infected teeth removed and we thought that was the end of it, but about two weeks later we realized the vet's original prediction was correct. We suspected the cancer also spread to his brain, as his behavior got increasingly erratic in the last two weeks. On the 27th the tumor caused his jaw to break which pretty much inhibited him from eating and drinking. It was the right call to put him down, but it still absolutely destroyed me. I don't know if I will ever be the same.

We picked him and his sister up as newborns from the family farm. His mom gave birth to them during a flash flood so they had to be inside. My parents said they had a third sibling (probably the runt) that didn't make it, I don't remember tho. I won't upload them here for obvious reasons but there's pictures of me when I was five or so holding him when he was just a few days old. We didn't even have carriers when we took them home, me and my brother carried them in our arms the entire time. Definitely not safe now that I think about it.

He had been with me throughout my life. When I came home from school he would be meowing at the door to greet me. I could never sneak around at night without him joining me (and often being very loud while doing it, he was a very talkative cat) he loved people food and would regularly jump up on the dinner table to "join" us for dinner. If you left your meal unattended for a moment he would snatch it up. He liked to drink the milk out of the cereal bowls. We had to cover the sink when we had meat unthawing because he would help himself. He would also frequently raid the pantry and eat uncooked pasta for some reason. He had such a silly meow too, possibly the most masculine-sounding cat I've ever heard. I swear he could say some words like "mom" and "hello" when he wanted to. He was a smart little guy, so maybe. He was a surprisingly fearless cat too, one of the few I've ever met who wasn't afraid of the vacuum. He straight up did not give a fuck. One of my favorite activities was to wake him up while he was napping just to see him look at me all disgruntled and then settle back down. I don't know why, but it always made me smile. He also really loved the outdoors, despite the fact we never let him outside until the end. He had a very high prey drive and attempted to take down a magpie until the magpie tried to take him down, lol. He was a very happy, active, and loving cat right up until his last day. So much so we went back and forth on putting him down.

He was a very charming cat, everyone who came by the house would comment on him. He was so full of personality and loud, he wanted to be involved in everything and that included social gatherings. People absolutely loved him. I had several friends joke that they would steal him from us. He made such an impact on people. He was so beloved. Maybe even a micro celebrity in my small town.

I was distraught last year when I had to move out for college. I demanded pictures of them every day I was away. When I did come home I loved watching him sniff me and then light up in excitement and meow when he realized I was back. I really hope he didn't think I abandoned him.

Saying goodbye to him yesterday was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. He's been such a huge part of my life for so long that the fact I have to go without him from now on feels like a foreign concept. I still don't know if I've fully processed the fact that he's really gone yet, if I think about it for too long I start to feel nauseous. I keep expecting him to round the corner and greet me or to hear him meowing when I close my bedroom door. My poor little buddy, I was really hoping you'd have a few years yet.

Rest easy my sweet boy. You were so much larger than life.

If you've read this far, thank you so much. Here's a gallery of him, bask in his greatness!

[marvelousbirthdays]

Happy Birthday, mcgregorswench!

September 25 - ShieldShock for @mcgregorswench

As fluffy and sweet as you can make it. Where both are clueless as to the other's connections with the Avengers, like Steve doesn't know that Darcy works with Jane and is best buds with Thor (and also happens to be Tony's sister or daughter), and Darcy doesn't realize her Steve Rogers is actually THE Steve Rogers aka Captain America.

AN: Set between The Avengers and CA:TWS. Not compliant to any canon whatsoever. Big thanks to CatrinaSL for cheerleading, some fantastic ideas when I hit a block, and betaing for me.

Written by @ibelieveinturtles 

 When he looked back on everything, Steve found it completely amazing—miraculous, even—that he and Darcy had known each other for so long, without knowing who the other really was.

Two days after the battle in New York, he signed a confidential contract with S.H.I.E.L.D., including clauses covering secrecy, confidentiality, and anonymity. In other words, don't tell anyone anything, up to and including, who you really are.

When they offered him a new identity, however, he turned it down.

“I've lost everything else already—you can't have that,” he told Fury, in no uncertain terms.

Fury offered a compromise: “You can keep everything except your year of birth. The council wants everyone's identities kept secret—well, as much as we can—but if anyone does get curious or recognise you, tell ‘em you're a distant cousin. Families throw up look alikes all the time. I’m the spitting image of my great granddaddy on my mother’s side, so ‘Captain America’s third cousin twice removed’ shouldn’t be a hard sell, even for you.”

Deal done, Steven Grant Rogers, born 4th July 1988, headed off to Culver University, where he enrolled in summer classes, studying Modern History, and a unit of independent learning, custom-designed to ease him into the new century before he took up his new position at S.H.I.E.L.D.’s Washington DC headquarters.

He met Darcy on the first day. Overwhelmed by the crowds of people, the noise, and already wondering if he'd made a mistake, he ran straight into her.

They collided with the force of a thousand supernovas… Well, the bump was hard enough to knock her off balance, and Steve barely managed to catch her before she hit the ground.

“Woah, I got ya,” Steve said, as he carefully set her back on her feet.

“Thanks for the save, dude,” the young woman said a little breathlessly. “Sorry about that. Serves me right for texting and walking, I guess.” She waved her phone at him, and he couldn’t help noticing the stylised drawing of Thor on the case. It matched the t-shirt she was wearing, and the messenger bag slung across her body.

“No, it was entirely my fault,” Steve protested. “I wasn't paying attention. I'm the one who should be sorry.”

“First time here?” she asked.

“Um, yeah. It's a little overwhelming,” he looked around at the crowded, noisy courtyard. “I've never actually done anything like this before.”

“You’ll get used to it in no time,” she assured him, adding a welcoming smile. “Welcome to Culver! I'm Darcy,” she said, holding her hand out.

“Steve,” he said, taking her hand. “I hope you're right. I have no idea what I'm doing.”

She studied him for a moment. “Gimme one second.” She did something with her phone, and then looked up again. “Look, I don’t have to be anywhere for a couple of hours, and I know from experience how overwhelming it can be. How about I give you some tips about getting around over coffee?”

Steve ran a hand through his hair. “I don't want to inconvenience you,” he hedged.

“Hey, no sweat, dude. I'm in desperate need of coffee anyway, so you'd be doing me a favour.”

Steve smiled, deciding right there and then that there was no way he was going to turn her down. “Well, in that case, I could definitely use the help.”

Ten minutes later they were seated in a small cafe with food and coffee, and she was giving him a brief history of the college.

“And then a few years ago, The Hulk showed up and wrecked half the school. Thank God, I wasn't here for that! Apparently it was a super clusterfuck.”

“The Hulk was here?” Steve made the appropriate noises of shock and surprise, even though Bruce had told him all about the incident when suggesting Culver as something to do for a few months.

Darcy nodded, shoving some fries into her mouth. “There’s a rumour that he used to teach here. I mean, I don’t know if it’s true or not, but the STEM departments have kind of adopted him as their unofficial mascot.” She leaned closer to him, as if about to impart a secret. “Personally, I think he’s pretty awesome, especially after what happened in New York—I mean, he saved Iron Man's life! A raging, mindless monster wouldn't have done that.“

“No… no, you’re right about that,” Steve said, and then angled for a change of subject. “So, what are you studying?”

“Well, I’ve already got a degree in Political Science, and now I’m working on my Masters in International Relations. You know, diplomacy, public relations, negotiation, that sort of thing.”

“Wow, that’s impressive. What will you be able to do with that?”

“A lot of different things! I’ve already got a couple of options, but I’m gonna stick with my current boss for now; she’s my best friend, and we’ve been through a lot together. I don’t really need to make a decision yet, so I won’t.” She punctuated the remark by snapping her teeth on the last fry, and grinning at him. “So, I’m actually thinking that this might be easiest if I give you a guided tour. What do you think?”

After all this time, Steve still thought that accepting her offer of a guided tour was the best decision he’d ever made.

~*~

As luck would have it, Darcy’s boss was currently based in Washington DC, and they soon settled into a completely random, not-routine of seeing each other whenever they were both in the city. Between his "job” in International Search and Rescue, and her frequent field trips with the Boss Lady, it was impossible to keep to a set schedule.

On one sad, Steveless day, Darcy arrived home from a long day of Jane-herding and was staring into her fridge debating between cooking or ordering pizza, when Steve texted her. He was home— pizza it was!

She could feel the goofy grin paste itself across her face as she hit send on her reply. Steve had only been away for a week, but she'd been surprised by how much she missed him.

The pizza arrived first, but she'd barely set the boxes down before her intercom chimed again. She buzzed Steve in, and finished setting the table.

There was a knock on the door.

“Hi,” Steve said, kissing her on the cheek and presenting her with flowers he bought on his way over.

“Oh, they're beautiful. Thank you.” She stepped aside to let him in, then led him to the kitchen.

“How was your trip?” she asked as she hunted through her cupboards for something vase-like.

“Well, it was a slow week,” he said, remembering how they'd spent four days tracking a giant space slug in the Amazon jungle. “But we got the job done. What about you? How was yours?”

“Same old, same old,” Darcy replied, giving up on her quest to find a vase. She turned back to Steve. “Boss Lady had a breakthrough, and is determined to give the entire scientific community the proverbial finger.” (She carefully didn't mention that the breakthrough was actually to another dimension. They'd been lucky to get it closed before it caused any problems.)

“Well, I can't wait to see that,” Steve said.

“It'll be a good memory, I guarantee it,” she agreed. She tilted her head to one side as an idea popped into her head. “Do you have any objections to these flowers living in a jug?”

“Not at all.”

“Good. We'll go vase shopping tomorrow.”

She dumped the flowers in an ugly old plastic jug, filled it with water, and set it on the counter.

“Perfect,” Steve said, taking her in his arms and planting a firm kiss on her mouth.

They spent the whole of the following afternoon scouring the city for the perfect vase. As it turned out, there were three perfect vases in the city of Washington DC, so Steve bought her two more bouquets. After helping her arrange them throughout her apartment, it hit him that he'd rather be here than anywhere else. The only time he stayed at his own apartment was when Darcy was away on a field trip with the woman he still only knew as Boss Lady. More than half of his wardrobe had taken up residence in her cupboards, and other random belongings are scattered throughout.

It got him thinking.

~*~

The first time he asked Darcy to marry him, they'd been officially dating for about a year. It didn’t seem like it had been that long, but he'd fallen head over heels, and wanted to tell her everything.

They were coiled together in a post-orgasmic haze, and it just kind of… slipped out. She laughed. Actually laughed. “Fantastic sex, a good marriage does not make,” she said. “I love you, but I'm not ready to get married just yet.”

She didn't say yes, but it wasn't an outright no, either.

He managed to wait a couple of months before asking again, but once again it was a spur of the moment thing. Boss Lady had decided to go to London for a few months, and he was petrified that she’d forget him, or not come back, or that they’d drift apart, or… he’s not sure about that last ‘or’.

She sighed, but it was a loving sigh, not a ‘what the hell’ sigh. “Steeeve. Honey.” She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck, and stared into his eyes. “You know I love you, right? But marriage isn’t a spur of the moment thing. Now, kiss me—I’m not going to see you for the next three months, and I need something to get me through!”

He kissed her thoroughly, and once again took heart from the fact that she didn’t actually say no.

He didn’t hear about the Dark Elves until well after the fact—blackout missions didn’t happen very often, but this one had lasted a month, and he felt every second of it by the time they got back. He’d left his civilian, Darcy-only phone in his locker, but Fury had insisted on an immediate debrief before they even had a chance to shower, so the first he heard of it was from a fragment of conversation that drifted out of a break room as he walked along the corridor towards the changerooms.

He headed straight for his locker and his Darcy phone.

The first message was ‘Shit, I’ve lost the Boss Lady,’ followed by, ‘Why won’t anyone answer their goddam phone today?’ and ‘IT’S OKAY I’M ALIVE!!’ and finally ending with, ‘Boss Lady’s boyfriend is back!! Staying in London for now, but will be back in DC soon. Call me when you can.’

He hadn’t even known that Boss Lady had a boyfriend.

He called straight away.

“I just got back,” he said. “What in seven hells happened?”

“Steve! I was starting to worry about you!”

“Sorry, we lost all our communication in a storm.” It wasn’t the whole truth, but it was close enough, he decided.

“Well, to make a long story super short, evil elves invaded London, and Thor saved us all,” Darcy said.

“What? Evil elves? Thor? You mean, like the Avengers Thor? I didn’t think anyone had seen him since New York!” Steve was flabbergasted. No one had said anything to him about Thor returning.

“They hadn’t, but he just showed up out of nowhere! Look it up on YouTube; there’s so many videos, even the jack-booted thugs couldn’t keep up. They gave up trying to take them down about three days after it happened.”

“Can I come and see you?” Steve asked. “My boss owes me a few days—”

“YES!” Darcy shouted down the phone. “But I’ll book us a hotel, okay? Trust me, you do not want to stay with us now that The Boyfriend is back.”

“Okay, I’m gonna go home, pack a bag, and jump on the first plane I can,” he said. “I’ll let you know all the details, and I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Darcy replied. “I miss you so much. Oh god, I’m so excited now, Steve! Hurry up!”

“Okay, okay. I’m hurrying. I’ll call you from the airport.”

He wrangled a whole week’s worth of leave out of Fury (on the condition that he touched base with Thor while he was there) and proposed for the third time at the top of the London Eye. Darcy said he was affected by the view, but once again didn’t say yes, but didn’t say no either. In fact, she didn’t even say “not yet."

~*~

Darcy glanced at the clock and checked her appearance in the mirror one last time. Steve’s boss had called him earlier in the day, and asked him to check in with a client while he was in London. Even though he was on vacation, and they had a dinner reservation, he’d agreed to run the errand. He’d rung her half an hour ago to say that the meeting had gone much longer than he’d expected, and that he would meet her there.

She grabbed her purse and phone, opened the door, and standing there with a hand raised, ready to knock, was her father.

“Oh,” she gasped. “Jesus, Tony. You almost scared me half to death. What are you doing here? And how did you find me?”

“I’m here for a thing, so I thought I'd drop by,” Tony replied with a self satisfied grin. “Foster told me where you were.”

“Why were you talking to Jane?” she asked, suspicion hijacking her brain and refusing to let go. “Are you trying to convince her to sign with SI again?”

“I came to see Thor,” Tony said, “and then Capsicle showed up too—I wasn't expecting that. We had an extra long lunch, it was nice. But to answer your question, of course I am; how else am I going to get you to come home?”

“Even if she does agree to work with you, I’m not living in the Tower, Tony. I like my independence.”

“So you keep saying. Anyway, I didn’t actually come here to debate your residence in the Tower. Would you like to have dinner with me? I'll invite Cap as well.”

“You can't do that. Anyway, I have a date,” Darcy blurted out.

“Ah, I see. Everyone's turning me down tonight. Even Spangles turned me down! What could he have to do that's better than spending time with me?”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “I can think of a few things.”

“You wound me!” Tiny gasped in mock offense. “So your date tonight. Still the same guy? The one from DC?”

“Yes,” she replied, stepping out the door and pulling it closed behind her.

"When do I get to meet him?” Tony asked, following her to the elevator.

Darcy pushed the button, then turned and gave him a stern look. “Tony—Dad—I love you, but you're still you. And you're Iron Man. Remember those new security protocols Fury put in place last year? I literally need to marry the guy before I can introduce him to my own father, but how can I marry someone when I'm hiding such a big thing from them?”

Tony kissed Darcy in the middle of her forehead.

“The whole world already knows I'm Iron Man,” he shrugged. “That rule should not apply to me. If your guy can't handle that, you're better off without him.”

Darcy smiled. “And then you can introduce me to Captain America, right?”

Tony grinned. “My Steve is way better than your Steve,” he declared.

“Oh my god, Tony! You know you shouldn't even be telling me his name!” Darcy protested as the elevator arrived. “Just because I'm already associated with you and Thor, DOES NOT mean I automatically get to know any other Avengers!”

“I can change that!” Tony said, following her onto the lift. “The Avengers could use someone like you. I get you on the payroll, and everything would be perfect.”

Darcy frowned. There was a reason she’d chosen International Relations for her Masters, even if she hadn’t really acknowledged it at the time. “I’ll think about it,” she said at last. “But I still need to finish my thesis, and since the convergence Jane’s gotten enthused again. She’s got a lot to study over here.”

Tony nodded. “I understand. Also—and I shouldn’t be telling you this by the way—S.H.I.E.L.D. is going to be asking Thor to help them out occasionally. They’ll probably lean on him and Foster to come back to the States sooner, rather than later.”

“Hah!” Darcy snapped. “When they didn’t even answer my phone calls when Jane went missing, and then didn’t show up until after everything was all over? Not if I have anything to do with it, Tony. No. Fucking. Way. I'd rather she work for you!”

Tony threw his arm around her shoulder and hugged her tightly. “That’s my girl.”

They exited the elevator, and made their way outside.

“How are you getting to your date?” Tony asked, handing his valet slip to the attendant. “Can I give you a ride?”

“Well, I was gonna take a cab, but yeah, I'd like that.”

The ride to the restaurant wasn't a long one, and halfway there Darcy gathered her courage.

“I'm thinking that when I get back to DC I might ask Steve to move in with me ,” she said.

“Again: when do I get to meet him?”

“Tony! He keeps asking me to marry him. Three times in six months... and I want to say yes, but I'm scared about what might happen when he finds out about you, and Jane, and Thor. I thought, maybe living together first would be a good way to see if we'll really work or not.”

“That sounds reasonable to me,” Tony said. “But you have to tell him about me first, and I want to be behind the door as exhibit A when it happens.”

Darcy laughed as her father pulled into the curb half a block down from her destination. “You're incorrigible.”

“It's one of my better talents,” Tony quipped. “Come and see me when you get home. I'll be waiting!”

~*~

Darcy, Boss Lady, and The Boyfriend returned to DC on Christmas Eve. Steve was already at her apartment, having let himself in with the key she'd given him before he left London. He tidied and dusted, then went out and found what was possibly the last decent Christmas tree in the city.

By the time she arrived home, the tree was decorated, dinner was in the oven, and Steve was watching the cheesiest Christmas movie he could find.

“Oh my God, could you get any more perfect?” Darcy asked once she'd recovered from his welcome home kiss.

“I didn't actually cook,” he admitted. “It's from a restaurant a friend recommended.”

“I don't care—it smells amazing.”

They ate in front of the movie, then Steve insisted Darcy shower while he cleaned up.

“You know, I could get used to this,” Darcy said later, curled around him as they lay in bed. “Coming home to dinner, and a homey apartment… and you.” She lifted her head to look at him. “I think you should move in with me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really. You practically live here already, why not make it official?”

Steve could think of plenty of reasons why he should say no; the main ones being S.H.I.E.L.D. and not being able to tell her who he really was.

“You don't have to decide straight away,” she continued, “I know it's a big decision. Just... think about it?”

“Okay. I can do that.”

Steve tried to put off thinking about his dilemma and just enjoy the time he had with Darcy. He succeeded, mostly, allowing himself to make endless pros vs. cons lists only after she fell asleep at night. Three days later, when he got called out on a mission, it was harder to push out of his mind. In Darcy’s presence he could forget anything unpleasant; in an abandoned bunker stuffed with undecipherable technology, it wasn’t so easy. As he watched Tony take apart a piece of modified electronics, Steve decided to take the opportunity to talk to someone who wasn't S.H.I.E.L.D.

“Can I ask you something?”

“What's up, Cap?” Tony asked, elbow-deep in computer components.

“My girlfriend asked me to move in with her.”

Tony paused and looked at him. “You have a girlfriend?”

“You don’t have to sound so surprised.”

“And she asked you to move in with her?”

“That’s what I said.”

“Does she know who you are?”

Steve sighed. “That's the problem—she doesn't. I want to tell her, but I can't.”

Tony nodded. “Fury’s security protocols. Do you love her?”

“More than I ever dreamed,” Steve admitted. “I'd marry her tomorrow if she'd just say yes.”

“Have you asked her?” Tony asked.

“Three times now,” Steve said with a self deprecating smile. “She just says she's not ready for marriage, and changes the subject.”

Tony put his tools down and straightened up, turning to look at Steve. “Three times? Has she actually said no?”

Steve shook his head, a little unnerved by the fact that Tony was ignoring his work to have a personal conversation. “No, just ‘not yet’.”

Tony stared, blinked, then stared some more.

“Tony? Is something wrong?”

“Out of curiosity... have you met her parents yet? Her father?”

“No, but... I thought people didn’t care so much about that sort of thing nowadays.”

Tony shook his head. “Never mind; nothing to worry about. I think you should do it. Move in with your girl, show her you're serious, and maybe you'll get that yes so you can come clean.”

“I would, but I wonder… What if she doesn't want Captain America in her life?”

“If she really loves you, she'll come around.” Tony turned back to his work. “She'll probably be really mad at first, but that's always a risk in any relationship. There's always something that’s gonna make someone mad. You just have to get through it.”

“Voice of experience?” Steve asked.

Tony nodded. “Take the chance, Cap. Take the chance.”

~*~

(When Tony got home, the first thing he did was ask Jarvis for the security footage from his daughter's apartment block during Christmas. When his suspicions were confirmed, he laughed for a solid five minutes.)

~*~

Steve’s S.H.I.E.L.D. apartment was exactly that: an apartment belonging to S.H.I.E.L.D. It came fully furnished, and he had never been one to collect much, so there was very little in it that belonged to him. It took him half a morning to pack up his stuff, and he was all moved in with Darcy by New Year’s.

As he sat on Darcy’s couch, arm around his girl, watching fireworks, and waiting for 2014 to start, he realised that he hadn't felt this happy—this comfortable, so at home—since he'd woken up almost two years ago. A neuron fired in his brain, and he knew: this was what he'd wanted his whole life.

As the clock ticked down, he closed his eyes and made a wish. For a good year. For Darcy to say yes to his next proposal (which he was determined to do properly this time: ring, knee, the lot). For Darcy to be okay with him being the Real Steve Rogers (and Captain America).

As the last seconds counted down, Darcy turned to him and smiled.

“Happy New Year, Steve,” she said, eyes shining as she leaned up to kiss him.

~*~

Steve's last proposal was planned properly.

Ring, dinner, flowers, speech. Everything done right.

Whenever they can, they rendezvous at the subway station after work and then walk home together through the park. Some days they talk a lot; some days they don't. On this particular day, they were both lost in their own thoughts, when Darcy stopped suddenly.

“Darce?”

“I'm ready for you to meet my father,” she said.

“Um, okay?”

“And… I want to marry you,” she continued. “If you still want to marry me, that is.”

He stared at her for a moment, gobsmacked at what she'd just said to him, and then he started laughing. He couldn't help it.

“Okay, I'm not sure if you laughing at me is a good sign?” Darcy looked equal parts worried and amused. “I never laughed at you!”

“I'm sorry.” He gathered her up in his arms, and hugged her tightly. “It's just, I finally planned out a proper proposal, and you blurt it out while we're walking through the park.”

“You planned a proposal?” She blinked at him.

He pulled the box out of his pocket. “There's flowers and dinner at home, but I've had this in my pocket for a few weeks now.” He opened the box.

“That's a really nice ring,” was all she said.

“It is,” he agreed. “And I think it would look nicer on your finger.”

She looked down at the ring again, and he held his breath. “Yes. You're right. It would look nicer on my finger.”

“Does that mean you're going to wear it?”

“I do have a few things I should probably tell you first; I don't know if you're going to like them." she said.

“Me too, but you wanna give me an answer first? Please?”

“Hang on, didn't I just propose to you?”

“Yes, you did, and yes I will. Whatever secrets you have, I will deal with them,” Steve said solemnly.

“In that case, yes, Steve. I will most definitely marry you, and ditto on the secrets. Now gimme that ring!”

He put the ring on her finger, and she flung her arms around him, kissing him breathless.

“Let's go home.”