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malecsecretsanta · 7 years ago

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Merry Christmas, @notcrypticbutcoy!

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*****

The More I Know You (The More I Want To)

Magnus starts it…well not on a whim, per say. But it does just sort of happen one day, when he decides he’s going to restore the old Victorian house he lives in. The house stands on twelve acres of land in western Massachusetts and, while it was beautiful when his parents bought it (long before he came along), it’s since fallen into disrepair.

His parents passed away a year ago, and now every time he walks through the house he’s reminded of its potential. Of the potential they dreamed for it. So he finds himself sitting at the kitchen island one day, eating breakfast and scrolling through tile options on The Home Depot website.

Two hours later, he’s at the cash register with a cart full of tile, glue, faucets, drawer pulls, and curtain rods. The cashier smiles at Magnus as he rings him up. “Big project?” the man asks. His tag reads “Jace.”

Magnus smiles at the blonde teller and nods. “Yes! I’ve decided to update my house and figured I could start in the bathrooms.”

Jace quirks an eyebrow. “All on your own?”

“Actually, I was wondering if you knew any good handymen. I was going to look online but thought I might try word-of-mouth first.”

As Jace pushes buttons on the screen and tells Magnus his final total, he nods. “Actually, my brother, Alec, does some housework. He’s pretty good, helped me rewire my house last year. I can give you his number if you want?”

Magnus pays and loads his haul back into the carriage. “That would be fantastic.”

Jace grabs a slip of paper and writes down a ten-digit number. “Have a wonderful day,” he says with a smile, handing over Alec’s number.

---

“Hi, is this Alec?” Magnus paces in the small area of the first floor bathroom, stalling at the sink before turning and running into the half-demolished tub-slash-shower mess. He runs his hand through his already disheveled and plaster-dust-filled hair.

“Speaking…”

Magnus tilts his head back, eyes closed in silent thanks. “Jace at The Home Depot gave me your number. You’re a handyman, right?”

“That I am!” the voice on the other line confirms. “Do you have a project you need help with?”

Magnus chuckles. “Uh, you could say that. I’m knee-deep in some renovations and have discovered that not only is this a lot harder than I thought it would be, it also requires two people. And one of those people needs to have some basic knowledge of how to demo properly.” He closes his eyes again. “You wouldn’t happen to be free today to help me? I’m kind of stuck between a rock and a hard place. And I mean that almost literally.”

“Sure…but do you want to know my rates first so you can—?”

Magnus cuts him off. “Not to be rude, but if you’re as good as I need you to be then I’ll pay you whatever you want. I’m in quite the pickle right now and could use you ASAP.”

Alec pauses and then Magnus hears him ask, “What’s your address?”

---

Magnus….Magnus did not expect Alec to be this attractive. He just kind of stands there, looking at the exceedingly handsome, well-built Alec, while the handyman stands in the entrance of the bathroom surveying the damage. Magnus tries not to stare at the muscles peeking out from beneath the sleeves of Alec’s black tee or at the toned legs shown off by Alec’s jean shorts. And he tries valiantly to keep his cool when Alec turns his teenage-dream-boat eyes to Magnus. He fails epically.

“This is a lot of damage already for such a small person,” Alec remarks, a hint of a joke in his tone.

Magnus blinks at him. “I promise to not take offense to that if you promise to help even now that you’ve seen the damage.”

Alec grins at his new boss and nods. “Fair enough. Sounds like a deal to me.” He steps over the huge pile of tiles (using his long legs that have not gone unnoticed by Magnus because damn) and stops in front of the shorter man. “So you’re trying to replace the…?” He quirks his eyebrow, waiting for Magnus to fill in the gaps.

Magnus smiles. “What, you can’t tell by the mess?” His grin falls and he shrugs. “Ok fine. No, you can’t tell by the mess. I was hoping to replace the shower unit with tile instead of that ugly white plastic. Also the faucet in the sink, the drawer pulls on the cabinet, the showerhead….there’s something I’m forgetting…oh! The flooring!” He looks down at his feet and taps the toes of his shoes against the bright blue ceramic tile. “Ugly fucking floor,” he mutters under his breath.

Alec must hear him, because the next thing Magnus knows, the man is guffawing. The sound resonates around the small room and Magnus can’t help but join in, the sound contagious. “That really is a lot of damage for someone with no experience.”

“How do you know I don’t have any experience?” Alec quirks an eyebrow and Magnus nods. “Point taken. So? Where do we start?”

Alec grins. “Well, we start by you stepping over this pile and leaving me to work on this.”

Magnus frowns. “Well, I sort of wanted to work on this, too.”

Alec nods. “I understand, but there’s really only enough space in here for one person…and that person needs to have a clue what they’re doing.” He surveys the damage again, thinking. “How about this? I’ll work on clearing this out while you do…whatever you want to do. And when I’m ready to start laying the tile down you can come in and tell me where you want things to go. And you can help lay the tile if you promise to do it exactly how I tell you to.”

“I suppose that’ll work. I’ll just be in the office, then.” He turns to leave and then reverses course. “You’ll come get me?”

Alec looks up from where he’s squatting down, hands full of plaster. “Of course I will. These tiles are heavy and I don’t feel like bending to pick them up. I could use an assistant.” He winks at Magnus and then turns to get to work.

---

“So what prompted the renovations?” Alec asks an hour later.

Apparently, he wasn’t kidding about the helping, and Magnus hands him another tile before responding. “My parents have been gone for a year and I grew up in this house with them. I had the money and the time and I guess I wanted to honor their investment by making it a little nicer.” He shrugs. “The house hasn’t been the same since they died.”

Alec looks up at him after placing another tile on the wall. “I’m sorry if I brought up any negative emotions.”

He looks sincere and so Magnus smiles wanly. “You didn’t know. It’s ok…this house holds a lot of great memories for me. And honestly I think they would want me to do this. They always complained about how the house was falling apart.” He bends to pick up another tile and tilts his head as he looks at the ones on the wall. “Do those look crooked to you?”

Alec’s eyebrow shoots up. “My work is perfect. Your head is crooked.”

Magnus grins and hands him the tile. They work in silence for a while longer. Magnus’ stomach growls loudly and he inspects the time on his phone. “Can I get you anything for lunch?”

Alec, who crouches over a plastic jug to mix grout, pauses to look at Magnus over his shoulder. “You don’t have to do that.”

Magnus waves him off. “I’m going to order sandwiches from a shop in town and go pick them up. What would you like?”

“A BLT? Mustard, no mayo. And a Pepsi?”

Magnus grins. “Got it. Will you be ok here until I get back?”

Alec nods and turns back to mixing the grout. “I’ll be here. Might be able to finish up the shower before you get back.”

“Perfect! I’ll see you in a bit.”

---

On the drive to town Magnus realizes two very important things. The first is that he’s going to need to keep Alec around for a while because this is going to take a lot longer than he expected. And the second is that, if he’s not extremely careful, he could find himself falling headlong in love with Alec.

He lists all of the adjectives he thinks describe Alec (gorgeous, witty, intelligent, gifted, strong, compassionate) in his mind while he pays for the sandwiches and then spends the entire car ride back wishing he hadn’t. Because Alec is exactly the type of guy Magnus would fall for and he seriously can’t spend the next few weeks ogling his handyman at every turn.

He thinks, though, as he hands over the sandwich to Alec who takes it with a smile, that they could become friends.

---

“Did you have a plan at all when you started this?” Alec asks over lunch. In the time Magnus was gone, Alec managed to redo the tile in the shower. He’d emerged triumphantly when Magnus arrived with the sandwiches, taking his lunch gladly and proclaiming his genius.

“Of course I did. I wouldn’t start a project without a plan or an end goal.” He shrugs and takes a sip of his soda. “I just underestimated how much work it would be.”

Alec nods. “That’s what they all say.”

“How long have you been a handyman?”

“It’s been a while. I finished high school and my parents tried to push me down one path but I ended up forging my own. I’ve always been good with my hands.”

Magnus bites his tongue on the many lines of innuendo he wants to spew out. Instead he comments, “The bathroom does look great so far. When you’re finished with that do you think you can help me reno the kitchen?”

Alec looks around at the vintage cabinets, the art deco ceiling, the granite countertops. “Uh…what is it you want to renovate in here?” he asks dubiously.

Magnus sets down his sandwich. “I’ll show you.”

Twenty minutes later Alec is shaking his head and batting at Magnus’s hands to push him back and away from the plans on the table. “First of all, this ceiling is amazing and you just can’t do anything with it. And the cabinets are perfectly fine so don’t touch those either.” He starts to sketch something and cuts off Magnus’s protests. “You can, however, move the island back farther and do something with this wall separating the kitchen and the living room. It’s not load baring and it would open the space up more.”

“And I suppose you could do all this?”

Alec looks up with a smile. “I could, but it’ll take some time. You might be stuck with me for a month or so.”

Magnus shrugs nonchalantly, even though his smile ruins it. “I can think of worse things.”

---

Magnus likes having Alec in the house. He likes it a lot. Alec is even more amazing after two weeks than after two hours. So far, Magnus has helped him finish laying the tile on the bathroom floor, change the showerhead and faucet, and dismantle the current island in the kitchen. And they haven’t stopped talking the entire time.

“Is ‘Alec’ short for anything?”

“Yeah, Alexander.”

Magnus snorts. “Alexander the Great. What a fitting title.” He grunts as he shoulders one end of solid oak used in the construction of the kitchen island. On the other end of the plank Alec just shakes his head and lifts one hand to brush his hair from his eyes. He holds the plank easily in one hand.

“Lift with your knees, Magnus,” Alec says instead of retorting. Magnus just huffs.

While they’re covering the furniture in the living room with tarps to protect from demolition dust Magnus gets curious about Alec’s business. “So, you’ve been here Monday through Friday from ten until five for the past two weeks.”

Alec looks up at him over the back of one of the sofas. “Yes?”

“Do you not have any other clients?”

Alec smiles and looks down at his hands, smoothing out the tarp. “None that are this much fun to work with. Plus, the renovations you’re doing now are extensive enough that I don’t need to take on any other jobs at the moment.”

“So I have you all to myself.”

It’s kind of said in an undertone and Alec isn’t quite sure if he’s supposed to hear it. But he still smiles and says, “I guess you do.”

Magnus looks up at him. “What would you like for lunch today?” he asks instead of commenting on what may have been (what he hopes was) a moment between them.

---

Magnus cackles wildly as he brings down the sledgehammer against the wall once again. Dust and debris flies everywhere, ricocheting off the safety goggles Alec made him wear. His eyes are bright with joy when he looks over at Alec.

“Having fun?” Alec asks. He’s got his arms crossed over his chest like he’s waiting for Magnus to get tired and for the real demolition to begin. But he has a wide smile on his face and Magnus thinks they’ve crossed another threshold in their friendship. There’s something about the smile, like it’s a mixture of fond and fed-up that can really only be achieved once feelings get involved.

Magnus presents the hammer to Alec. “That was the most fun I’ve had in years.”

“You definitely need to get out more.” Alec keeps smiling as he says it, though, and takes the hammer. “Please stand back while the real professional works.”

Magnus rolls his eyes. “And when does she show up?”

Alec pauses with the hammer on his shoulder. “Are you questioning my abilities while I have a sledge hammer on my shoulder?”

Magnus chuckles. “No, of course I’m not,” he sarcastically tosses over his shoulder as he saunters out of the room. He can just barely hear the sound of Alec’s laughter over the hammer hitting plaster.

---

“So Jace tells me you haven’t taken any other clients in two months,” Isabelle says easily around her mug of coffee.

Alec rolls his eyes. “I’m allowed to run my business however I want to.”

“Run it straight into the ground for all I care. What I want to know is who is this mystery guy?”

“He’s…I don’t know, Iz, he’s great.” Alec blushes and takes a sip of coffee while Isabelle squeals in delight. “I’ve never met someone quite like him.”

“You like him! That’s amazing, Big Bro! Have you put the moves on him yet?” She waggles her eyebrows.

“It’s…there hasn’t been a right time. We’re just friends right now. Close, but friends.”

Isabelle rolls her eyes. “There’s gotta be more than that if he keeps making up projects for you.”

Alec shrugs. “The kitchen is almost done. He’s probably just going to pay me for that work and then send me on my way.”

“Yeah, but if he doesn’t that means that he still wants you around. Just go for it!”

Alec sips his coffee. “Maybe.”

---

“Do you think you can help me renovate the master bathroom and bedroom?” Magnus asks one morning while Alec’s measuring out the wood for the kitchen island. He’s standing in the (one unaltered) doorframe clutching his cup of coffee to his chest.

Alec looks up at him. “It’s going to be another few weeks of work.”

Magnus takes a sip of his coffee. “Good. I’ve started to enjoy having you around.”

Alec smiles, his heart skipping a beat, and looks down at the wood in his hands. “Why don’t you put that coffee down and come help me measure?”

Magnus snorts. “Right, cause that went so well the first time.”

“Just shut up and come over here.”

Magnus rolls his eyes but he’s smiling once he makes his way through the construction and debris. “Where do you want me?”

Alec grabs his arm and gently pulls him over where he’s standing. His arms form a cage around Magnus and they’re standing chest to back facing the wood. Magnus stops breathing. “This is your ruler,” Alec states, lifting Magnus’s left hand and placing it on the metal ruler. “And this is your pencil.” Alec folds a pencil into Magnus’s right hand. “Put the ruler on the end and measure six inches in.”

Magnus is hyper-focused on Alec’s touch surrounding him, his warm hands on his and his warm chest pressing into his back. He can even feel Alec’s breath on his ear as he leans over his shoulder. “Here?” Magnus asks, pressing his pencil down.

“Right here is perfect,” Alec replies quietly.

Magnus reads the double meaning in the statement and tries not to blush too furiously as he makes the mark. “Well this has all been very educational—“ he begins, turning in Alec’s arms. He’s stopped by their proximity, faces now inches away from each other, and looks down at Alec’s lips distractedly.

“I’ve always been told I’m a good teacher,” Alec says lowly, also staring at Magnus’s lips. His tongue comes out to wet his as he leans down toward Magnus, pulled by the gravity between them.

Magnus wants to lean in and seal their lips together but something is still holding him back. He leans away with a small apologetic smile. “I need to go do some of my own work. Thanks for the lesson.” He nudges past Alec’s arm and walks away but can’t help turning around and checking on Alec before he leaves the room. “Maybe you can teach me something else tomorrow.”

Alec looks up with a smile on his face. “I’ll be here for a while, right? Plenty of time to show you everything I know.”

Magnus picks up his mug and walks out of the room. He pauses in the hallway to lean his head against the wall and just breathe.

---

“Do you like him?” Catarina asks him over the phone. Magnus can hear the smirk in her voice.

“Gee, let’s think. I’ve been talking about him non-stop for three months and I keep making up projects so he’ll stay. Yeah, Cat, I think I like him.” He pauses, reconsiders, admits “I think I love him” in a quieter voice, full of vulnerability.

“Oh, honey, you’ve got it bad. But if you feel this way why haven’t you told him? You said he’s made moves on you, right?”

“Yes…”

“Well, why don’t you just let it happen?’

Magnus sighs and thumps his head back on the guest room bed. He’s been using this room since they started master bed and bath renovations. “I don’t know. Because I’m afraid it’ll end badly? What if he doesn’t love me, too, Cat?”

“Sounds to me like he does.”

“Maybe…”

Catarina sighs. “You want my advice? Go get him. Next time he makes a move don’t run away from him just go with it. I’m willing to bet you won’t be disappointed.”

Magnus nods. “You’re probably right. Thanks dear.”

She snorts. “Of course I’m right. Why else would you be calling me? Love you!”

---

Ultimately, it’s Magnus’s decision to rewire the house that brings them together. It’s…not his best idea. And he’s lucky Alec was coming over on his day off just to spend time with Magnus because something goes terribly, horribly wrong.

Alec pulls into the driveway just as lights in the living room start to flicker. He throws the truck in park and bolts into the house, his feet barely touching the ground. He finds Magnus lying on his back in the living room. When he presses his fingers to his neck he can’t feel a pulse.

Alec’s heart almost stops beating at the thought that Magnus might be dead. He dials 911 and puts the phone on speaker as he starts CPR. “911, what is your emergency?”

“I’m at 1149 Harkness Road. There’s a thirty-year-old man who was trying to rewire his house and got shocked. I can’t feel a pulse and I’m doing CPR,” Alec speaks quickly but clearly as he presses down on Magnus’s chest. The emergency service technician is speaking to him but he’s not listening, focusing entirely on keeping Magnus alive.

“Damn you,” he mumbles under his breath. Magnus doesn’t respond. Alec pulls back, takes a deep breath, and seals his lips around Magnus’s, pushing air into his lungs. He takes another breath and does it again before going back to compressions. “Come back to me,” he begs.

He gets through two more sets before panic starts to set in. He presses harder on Magnus’s chest and sends a prayer out to the universe before pressing his lips to Magnus’s again.

He doesn’t realize what’s happening at first. But then Magnus’s tongue presses against his and he’s now no longer performing mouth-to-mouth. Now it’s a full-on kiss. He pulls back with wide eyes and stares down at Magnus.

“You’re alive!” Alec breathes. “He’s alive!” he says loud enough for the phone to pickup even as he hears sirens in the distance.

Magnus blinks up at him, stunned. “What happened? Were you kissing me?”

Alec shakes his head. “You idiot.” And then he leans down and kisses Magnus properly because his heart is beating a mile a minute and he almost just lost this imperfect and ridiculous human and he can’t bear that thought. So he kisses Magnus softly and brushes his hair back from his forehead when he pulls back.

The paramedics come in after that and Alec follows them to the hospital. He waits for an hour until they’re done checking Magnus over and he can go into the room. “So apparently I have no idea how to rewire a house,” Magnus says sheepishly.

Alec shakes his head. “You scared me.” He walks over to the bed slowly, still talking. “What the hell were you thinking? Were you even thinking? You could have died, Magnus. Do you understand? I told you not to touch the wiring. Will you ever listen to me?” He reaches the bed.

Magnus grabs him by the shirt and reels him in for a kiss, because all he heard in Alec’s entire speech were the words I love you repeated over and over in six different ways. “I’m sorry,” he whispers against Alec’s lips.

“Moron,” Alec replies, though the insult is diminished by the fondness in his voice and the smile on his face.

A tiny voice sounds at the door behind them. “Knock, knock.” Alec turns to see an adorable nurse (she’s so tiny and there’s no way she’s much older than Alec) standing in the doorway looking sheepishly at them. “Sorry, gentlemen, just need to check on Mr. Bane here.” Alec steps back from the bed and she smiles at him. “Excuse me.”

“Do you think I’ll live?” Magnus asks, all serious. Alec wants to reach out and choke him. Too soon he mouths behind the nurse’s shoulder.

“Just barely, thanks to the person who saved your life,” the nurse responds, tilting her head in Alec’s direction. Alec nods in a ‘she knows what’s what’ sort of way. Magnus just grins at him.

“Am I cleared to leave?”

She shakes her head. “Not just yet, sorry. The doctor wants to keep you overnight to be certain you’re ok. I’m the overnight nurse on call, so if you need anything just press the button and ask for Clary.” She turns to Alec. “Good work saving him. I’ve known him all of five seconds and I can already tell he’s a pain.” She winks at him and walks out.

“Hey! What about bedside manner?” Magnus calls after her.

Alec chuckles. “Well I guess I’ll leave you to rest up for tonight. I’ll come back tomorrow to pick you up after they discharge you?”

Magnus nods and reaches out a hand. “Thank you for saving my life,” he says sincerely. “And I solemnly swear to never touch live wires ever again.” He squeezes Alec’s hand. Alec squeezes back and then they just sort of stay like that, looking at each other, until Magnus breaks first and bites his lip. “So, the kissing thing is nice,” he says.

Alec smiles back. “It’s much better when you’re fully conscious and not trying to lick my tonsils.”

Magnus drops his hand to throw both of his into the air. “I try to say one nice thing and you have to go and be all sarcastic about it.”

Alec’s laughing, though, and pulling Magnus’s hands back down onto the bed. “Calm down or they’ll keep you for longer than a night. Yes, the kissing is nice. And when I bring you back home tomorrow maybe we can continue it horizontally.”

Magnus quirks an eyebrow. “Oh yes, I think that can be arranged.” They lock eyes for a second and then both break down into laughter.

“I should go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Kiss for the road?” Magnus asks. Alec bites his lip and then leans down to kiss Magnus gently but thoroughly. “Damn,” Magnus whispers when he pulls back.

“Rest up,” Alec demands as he heads out of the room. He can’t fight the grin on his face.

When he gets to the parking lot, Alec pulls out his cell phone and calls his brother. “Hey, Jace, I need your help tonight. Think you’re up to pulling an all-nighter for the job I’m working?”

---

“So this is Magnus, huh?” Jace asks, studying the family picture on the wall. Alec remembers Magnus telling him about it, the happy photo of him and his parents smiling and laughing together. It was a candid photo during the last family photography session they ever had.

Alec stops next to Jace, arms full of wooden planks, and smiles. “Yeah, that’s Magnus.” He’s so happy in the picture, face lit up with joy, that Alec can’t help but smile.

Jace catches the expression on his face and rolls his eyes. “You’re so fucking in love it’s disgusting.”

Alec slaps him with the boards. “Shut up and follow me.”

They work through the night, finishing the painting and laying the wooden flooring. Alec already finished the master bath a week ago and the lighting in the room is done. All in all it looks warm and homey, even without furniture. “Not bad,” Jace says with a nod as he surveys their work.

“Come on, let’s work on the kitchen island while everything dries and sets.”

By the time eleven am rolls around and Magnus is texting Alec for a ride home, the furniture is back in the master bedroom and the kitchen island is three-quarters finished. Alec claps Jace on the shoulder. “Thanks for the help.”

Jace, expression exhausted, just nods. “Only because you love him.” He points at Alec. “And only because he almost died. You know you’re going to have to fill Izzy in about all this eventually, right?”

Alec groans and ushers Jace out of the house, locking up quickly. “Maybe if I stay away and keep hiding she’ll never know?”

Jace chuckles. “Like that would ever work. She’s Izzy.”

Alec waves him off and climbs into his car to head to the hospital. He parks in the lot and finds Magnus checking out at the front counter. Alec also notices a familiar head of red hair. “Hi, Magnus,” Alec says as he walks up to them.

“Hi Alec!” the nurse, Clary, greets. “Magnus and I were just talking about you. Well…we kind of didn’t stop talking about you all night.”

Alec’s eyebrows shoot up and he turns his gaze on Magnus, who’s looking sheepishly back at him. “I was bored. You know how it is. And it was a slow night for her so Clary and I stayed up chatting.” He yawns. “And as a result I didn’t get much sleep. The guest bedroom still has a mattress for me when we get home, right?”

Alec thinks of the surprise he has for Magnus but nods anyways. “Yeah, it’s still there until the master is finished.” He smiles at Clary. “Sorry he kept you from your work. Magnus doesn’t really have a concept of other people’s time.”

Magnus rolls his eyes and scoffs while Clary just giggles. “Oh, please, Alexander. Clary and I are great friends. She even added me on facebook.” He takes Alec’s hand and laces their fingers together. “But you are right. We should get home. It was lovely to meet you, Biscuit.” Magnus wraps his free arm around Clary and then lets Alec pull him away.

“How are you feeling?” Alec asks on the drive home.

Magnus shrugs. “Like I got electrocuted, died, and was brought to life by my boyfriend.”

Alec looks at him. “So we’re dating?”

Magnus rolls his eyes. “Unless you kiss every person you work for.”

“You mean you don’t kiss everyone who works on your house? My brother’s going to be so offended.”

Magnus scoffs but then hones in on part of Alec’s sentence. “Wait, when did your brother work on the house?”

Alec shrugs noncommittally and doesn’t respond. Magnus frowns but drops it. They’re almost home anyways.

---

“You’re kidding.”

Alec’s standing behind Magnus, arms wrapped around his waist and head lowered to rest his chin on Magnus’s shoulder. “Jace, my brother, helped. Do you like it?”

Magnus spins in his arms and locks his hands together around Alec’s neck. “I almost died and you saved me and yet instead of waiting for me to do something for you, you came here and did something for me?” Magnus pulls him down and kisses him. “Of course I like it.”

Alec leans down to kiss him again, except Magnus yawns and breaks the moment. He looks sheepish and sorry about it, but Alec can’t help the fond smile that breaks out on his face. “Let’s take a nap,” he suggests.

Magnus nods and slides out of his embrace. “A nap sounds like exactly what I need.” He kicks off his shoes before walking into the finished bedroom and walks into the closet to change into pajama pants. Before he gets too far with changing, he grabs a pair of his larger sweatpants and throws them out to Alec.

They climb into bed together; Magnus curls up against Alec and shivers at how warm his body is. They fit together easily and being in bed like this is just as easy as every conversation they’ve had since Alec saved Magnus in his bathroom all those weeks ago. Alec kisses the top of Magnus’s head and smiles down at him.

Magnus pulls him closer. “I think this is the start of a beautiful relationship,” he mumbles sleepily.

Alec chuckles. “Just go to sleep.” But there’s a smile in his voice and on his face, and he pulls Magnus just a little bit closer. Right before Magnus dozes off, he hears Alec whisper, “I’m so glad I didn’t lose you.” And he thinks he might hear Alec whisper, “I love you,” but he’s already half-passed-out and it might be his imagination.

Alec stares down at Magnus, running his fingers through his hair and thinking about what he just said to this man. The words feel heavy in his mouth, but still right. “Maybe I’ll tell you for real when we wake up,” Alec muses. He doesn’t think for much longer, though, as his own sleep deprivation pulls him under.

It’s the best either of them has slept in a long time.

#notcrypticbutcoy #malecsanta17 #*fic17 #*gifts17

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bethgreeneishopeunseen · 7 years ago

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PRODUCTION RENTALS

I think I might have taken my stalking to a whole new level… LOL MEAN WHATEVER! I saw this photo of NR from the season 8 set, and I couldn’t resist looking at the background of this photo since it got my TD lurking tingling:

Source (X).

“PRODUCTION RENTALS (770) 963-1234” Well, look at that. Search for that phone number on the net and what-do-we-have-here? http://lightnin.com/ Lightnin is the company AMC has hired to provide the set with equipment. Trucks and generators, camera dept, make-up and wardrobes, honeywagons… Trailers…… And it just happens to be so that Lightnin have photos of ALL of the trailers they can provide a production with. We literally now have PHOTOS of ALL of the trailers. Not only how they look on the outside, but the INSIDE too. I think this might be important to save in case a certain someone posts something.

——————————————————————————————————–

Thank you for this information, anon! This is wonderful to know.

(I found another, clearer shot of the trailer label.) (You can read more about cast trailers here, which includes relevant source links: X.)

I went through the different “star trailers” that the company offers, and you can see general similarities between the display models and the cast members’ trailers. There are differences though in design and some general features, probably due to when they’re rented/bought and what level of actor is using the trailer. The higher-paid actors, the main characters, would obviously have nicer accommodations. They would need such accommodations, due to the amount of time they spend in those trailers. The general feel and layout of the trailers for the cast are all the same, but different enough you can tell each one apart. For example, from what cast member pictures I’ve found, the cabinet handles are rounded while Emily’s are rectangular:

Is that a problem? No.The trailer company offers both handle shapes (X). Emily probably also received a new trailer starting in season 4 or 5, to coincide with her upgraded status and the eventual secretive filming. Overall, I’m even more convinced that the trailer Emily took selfies in last year is her TWD one.

She first caused stir when she posted twice from her trailer, during season 5 filming (X). The first picture was of her guitar, and she posted it the day Slabtown started filming. The second picture was the day Bethfoot was photographed, and she had removed her nail polish. Her lack of nail polish struck fans even then as she had been just filming the Rockstar music video that week and repainted her nails a few days after the Bethfoot fiasco.

Fans connected the locations as the polaroid picture had the same tiling as the guitar picture. The flooring is how I originally connected Emily’s two selfies the following year to the other pictures. The polaroid picture and her selfies both show a place with two types of flooring, one based in tile/laminate and wood. Reviewing the pictures, I couldn’t see the dark brown grout in the two selfies. That could be because of lighting/the filter, that part of the flooring being replaced due wear-and-tear, or a combination. But the three pictures still have the same wood flooring.

Emily posted the first selfie on October 26th, 2015, captioning it, “First day of school. But no calculus. 😁😜☺️”.

Now Love On the Sidelines was scheduled to film from October 26th to November 14th (X). It appears that the cast and crew stuck to this schedule for the most part, going by when the wrap party was held (X) (X) (X), and that’s not surprising. Love On the Sidelines is a Hallmark movie. Not much complexity in story or filming to worry over or intense scenes to rehearse with the actors. Emily posted a selfie on the 22nd, captioning it, “Good vibes today in Vancouver. 🎈💗” (X), and the actor of a minor character posted on the 25th about practicing his lines (X). Emily’s nail color was different though, being a dark purple in the 22nd picture rather than a light pink. She also dropped off the radar between the 22nd and 23rd, posting only in relation to her music, something that her manager could do (X). Emily was likely filming for TWD. With that in mind, I don’t think this selfie was posted in current time. I think it’s a latergram, going by the nail polish. Emily is very good at latergramming - she must have multiple versions of pictures saved on her phone to make certain later grams. She also likes to experiment with social media techniques, such as the geo tagging this year. I think she posted a latergram of her in her trail, from earlier during season 6 or even in five, to test what she could get away with. She then used that specific caption, about the first day of school, in order to make it seem like she was starting Love On the Sidelines.

The following month, on November 12th, when TWD was filming its finale and some of it in the studio, Emily posted her second and last selfie in this particular trailer. She captioned it, “GOODMORNING #stillasleep #foureyes,” but later deleted the picture after people began to comment that it looked like Norman’s trailer.

Once she realized that the technique didn’t work, that it only added fuel to the fire, she stopped doing it. She even deleted this particular selfie. But by deleting the selfie, she only looked more suspicious as it shouldn’t matter if her LOtS trailer looked like Norman’s. Not unless she was still actually on the show. If she had a picture in her LOtS trailer, one that was clearly for LOtS, she could have posted it. But obviously if she did that, people would see that they weren’t the same trailers. As an aside, I want to mention that she referenced the early morning in that post. On the East Coast, it would have been about 7:30. While Emily’s timestamp says 4:22 AM, there is a way to change the timezone on your phone, changing the timestamp. And there’s no way that she would have been at her trailer for LOtS so early. The movie never had very early morning/late night shoots. It was a standard Hallmark rom-com.

With all of this in mind, today I found a picture of Sabrina Gennarino in her trailer. (I was doing research for a different meta I had in mind.)

Source (X).

(Notice the physical similarities and differences, and how much smaller the space feels. Makes sense, since Tamiel isn’t a major character.)

Behind Sabrina hangs a few clothes, and the shirts are clearly Tamiel’s clothes, especially going the stains and the worn edges. A long time ago I read an article on what it’s like to be on a film set, and it mentioned that actors usually find their wardrobe hanging in their trailer (X). In Emily’s first selfie, I noticed that she had some clothes hanging up behind, and I wondered if they were one of Beth’s post-Coda outfits. I shelved the thought away, but Sabrina’s selfie brought it back as now I had concrete evidence that TWD handles its costumes the same way.

Look at the clothes. They aren’t chic and very feminine like Laurel’s outfits in Love On the Sidelines. Emily dressed fashionably and simply, playing a character who was passionate about fashion design but also living on a normal wage. These jeans though are dark and worn, reminiscent of the black, ripped jeans that Emily wore to the season six premiere. Emily has never been pictured wearing a white winter coat, and Laurel never dressed in wintery clothes. To be certain though that the wardrobe wasn’t for the Laurel character, I watched Love On the Sidelines, paying close attention to her outfits. Even while dressed casually, she wore new-looking clothes and she never wore dark, worn jeans. None of them also had a faded mark under the right pocket like this pair.

There is a black shirt of some kind hanging behind the jeans, and its fabric doesn’t match Laurel’s puffy dark cardigan and sleek business coats. The one thing that tripped me up was the shoes. I noticed Laurel wearing similar boots in the movie.

I followed a hunch though, and discovered that Emily owns a similar pair of boots, going all the way back to 2014 (X).

That trailer couldn’t have been for Emily’s Love On the Sidelines project. It’s her TWD trailer, and that’s why we haven’t seen it again, over a year later.

#team delusional #trailers #filming spoilers #submission #love on the sidelines

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haydennation · 8 years ago

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Nylon Guys Magazine Interview

By the time Hayden Christensen suggests that we hop on a couple of snowmobiles and go explore the extent of his 200 acre farm, it’s getting dark outside and the temperature is 10 degrees below freezing. The two hour drive from downtown Toronto up here into bleak, rural Ontario had taken close to four in a rented Toyota Corolla, the last 15 minutes of which were essentially tobogganing down roads closed to all but local traffic. Traffic was invariably composed, I noticed as I slid helplessly down tracks entirely covered in packed ice, of vehicles with very large tires and four wheel drive. Christensen purchased the farm, which is just up the road from his parents; home where he grew up, eight months previously. It’s his first house, and he’s clearly proud of it. “I did those,” he says, gesturing at his kitchen cabinets that are painted so that they appear cracked and aged, and launching into an explanation of the process-‘it takes forever but it sure is worth it.’ He has also tiled the surfaces, painted the walls, replaced the floors, and amassed a healthy collection of antiques from the shops in the surrounding villages, which are scattered throughout the house. Christensen, who was born in Vancouver, is a hands-on kind of guy; the sort who likes to chop wood and rear animals, build decks and grout, hike, fish, ride horses, grow crops, and construct barns. He’s most certainly not predisposed to sitting around and talking about himself and so far now it’s on with full body snowsuits, snowboots, touks as Canadians call beanies, gloves, and goggles and off to an outhouse to start up the snowmobiles. He seems excited, as if he’s waited all day for an excuse to get out there. Out in the barn, though, where he keeps his snowmobiles, ATVs and tractor (“I’m just learning how to use that-it’s harder than it looks”) there’s a problem. One of the machines won’t start. Christensen is crestfallen. “Man, this really sucks,” he says as he pulls one lever after the other on the sleek black machine. “I suppose we’ll have to go on the same one.” It’s a situation that raises an important question; just what am I supposed to hold on to? In the absence of any handles the only options are the actor’s waist or shoulders. I opt for the latter. “Ok, man,” he yells as the engine roars to life, “remember to lean when I lean, and hold on.” It’s been snowing for the past few weeks, but the clouds have parted for the time being and the bright halogen headlights of the snowmobile illuminate fresh powder, at least three feet deep, ahead of us. We fly through open gates, following a recently made trail (“My family came over yesterday,” he shouts. “We hitched a trailer to the tractor and took it out for a picnic”) impressed on the ground. On a gentle slope lie two discarded sleds, one pink one and one blue. (“We were going down the hill on those yesterday.” He says. “Very fun” ) Eventually we get to the top of the hill-Christensen takes off his goggles and stops the engine. “That’s the highest part of my land,” he says, with a grin, “and the highest in the county actually.” At the base of the hill evergreen wildwoods stretch, oblique and forbidding, across the countryside. In the dwindling light the snow, which lies very thick on ever fence-post, branch, and thorn bush, has taken on a blueish hue and the sky-the dark silver of mercury-seems to rest heavily on the land; the moon a chalky thumbprint. Every few miles, off in the distance, the warm lights of a house glow sleepily and implacably against encroaching darkness. “You see that clearing?” says Christensen, pointing to a pale spot a few miles into the woods. “That’s the boundary of my land. There’s a river that marks it, Isn’t it great? I really want to go down there and show you some more. There are trails that I haven’t been on this winter yet, they’d be fun.” And so we head back to the house, where he calls his dad, who informs him where the choke is on the other machine, and what to do with it. Now, with a working snowmobile each, we tear across unblemished snow and down into the forest. Christensen leading and ducking this and that to avoid the low hanging boughs of trees that are covered in snow that scatters like glitter as he passes. “Man.” He says as I pull up next to him by a copse of Douglas Firs, “how fun is this?” “I really want to do everything with the farm,” he says later, sitting one of two large white couches in his living room. The only light is coming from his 60 inch plasma TV showing a hockey match on mute, five or so large church candles, their wax dripping in pools around them, and the fire crackling in the hearth. “There will be dairy cows and probably some sheep. Maybe an alpaca-I hear they’re good for warding off predators. For some reason lavender really appeals to me. I’d like to grow a lot of Lavender. I think that front hay field I want to turn into a big lavender field. Apparently, it’s pretty easy to maintain.” He takes a long drag on his cigarette. “But it’s meant to be a bitch to harvest-you have to cut it all by hand.”

These are the words of a man entirely at ease with himself. Someone, who rich from the success of a starring role in the biggest franchise in movie history, can choose what projects he wants to do and when he wants to do them, and make all his decisions from right here on his couch, watching hockey. (he played competitively until he was 17. “A lot of the guys I played with are pro now”, in front of the fire in the middle of nowhere. “I had a lot of success really quickly but then I was happy not to have anything to do with it.” He says. “I need to not live the insulated life that I think a lot of the people in Hollywood live. I had a really odd relationship with my first agent, because he could never figure out why I wasn’t in L.A. and taking advantage of opportunities there. Star Wars was financially beneficial and all of a sudden I didn’t have a need for my next check and I got to look at acting and my work as really just sort of my own creative expression, and nothing else is really going to affect that. I was turning down what would be considered a lot of money because it wasn’t creatively what I wanted to do at the time.” Today Christensen is such a far remove from Hollywood that it’s easy to forget that he’s still an incredibly in demand actor with the ability to secure lead roles in big budget movies, should he want them. And while his interests mostly lie in developing smaller scale projects like 2003’s Shattered Glass-based on the story of the New Republic journalist Stephen Glass who invented a large percentage of the stories he wrote for the magazine-that Christensen starred in and produced with his brother. His latest project, the Doug Liman directed “Jumper” in which he plays a man with the ability to teleport, is nothing, if grand in scope. “When my agent first called about it. He was like, ‘so there’s this big Fox movie, science fiction, they possibly want to turn it into a franchise,’ and I was like ‘why are we talking about this? Don’t you remember those other movies I just did?” He’s laughing, spluttering over his cigarette. “Then he said “Doug Liman was directing it, I was like “Oh! I was a huge fan of his movies.” In Jumper, Christensen and fellow teleporter Jamie Bell find themselves in the middle of a war that has been going on for hundreds of years between the jumpers (of which there are evidently quite a few) and those who have sworn to kill them; a group led by Samuel L Jackson. Taking place all over the world (We even closed down the Colosseum for three days to shoot a scene”) the film is full of Wachowski brothers-like visual effects and dramatic camera angles. At first it might seem an odd choice for an actor who says he chooses his movies if “there’s something inside me that needs to play the character and needs to be part of the story”. But working with Liman, who insisted Christensen be part a part of a process of ‘figuring the movie out’ wasn’t an opportunity the actor was prepared to pass up. “I felt like I was working with another visionary filmmaker,” Christensen continues. “George Lucas was clearly one of those, and I feel like Doug is too.” Of course George Lucas is the reason anyone knows who Christensen is at all. The reason he is able to afford this house, the one he just closed in on in the Bahamas, all the mechanical toys in his big barn, and the fancy paint for his fancy cupboards. Before Star Wars, Hayden Christensen was an unknown actor living in Vancouver and working on a TV show called Higher Ground that aired on the Fox Family Channel. An agent suggested he audition for Star Wars in LA, which was annoying, he recalls, because he wasn’t making that much cash and had to fly himself down there. “The meeting lasted for maybe 10 minutes and George didn’t even mention Star Wars the whole time so I assumed it didn’t go very well. I was like, “Well, shit, I just flew all the way down here.” A month went by and Christensen, along with five other actors of which, reportedly Leonardo Dicaprio was one, were invited back to Lucas’s Skywalker Ranch to read with Natalie Portman. “They made sure we never saw each other,” he says with a smile. “Although, they have guest houses on the ranch and when I went for my audition I stayed in a room that I guess one of the other actors had stayed in as well and there was a voicemail on the phone from his mom saying, “I’m sorry it didn’t go well honey, but don’t worry, something else will happen” I was like ‘one down!” A few months later the call came. But as exciting a project as Star Wars was, as guaranteed as it was to be internationally successful, provoke hero worship among oddly dressed fans around the world, and set box office records, George Lucas is not exactly a director known for bringing out the best in people. He is, let’s not forget, the man who made Harrison Ford, Ewan Mcgregor, and even Alec Guinness look like puppets operated by puppeteers who had flunked out of puppetry school. “There were battle ships being rolled across the soundstages and you got to put a lightsaber in your belt every day: You were a hired hand,” Christensen says. “You weren’t there for your own creative expression. It’s a very specific style of acting and it’s all so preconceived…And the dialogue isn’t the easiest to say.” “Sometimes he would even do line readings with us,” Christensen glancing idly at the hockey score. “I would tell him that it’s easier if I don’t hear someone else saying the line because then I have that in my head and I’m just going to try and do that. And he was like, ‘No that’s ok, that’s what I want you to do.” He takes a drag on his cigarette and rearranges himself on the cushion. “It didn’t allow me to do my best work, nor did it any of the actors, but I always went to work thinking ‘This is the most unique experience’-I was just lucky to be there.” The fame that followed Star Wars would color Christensen’s perception of Hollywood forever. “From the day they made the announcement, there were people camped out in front of the apartment I was staying in,” he says. “I would go to a restaurant and all of a sudden there were paparazzi. It wasn’t something that happened over time and it wasn’t because of the work I was doing. This was all because I had a meeting with someone that no one knew about and because someone else decided they liked the way my nose sat on my face so my life was going to change.” Christensen’s understanding that it was the Star Wars name, not his, that was attracting his attention allowed him a “removed perspective” on it that seems to have endured ever since. “They offered me coaches to help me deal with it, but I felt like that was silly,” he says. “But then later I almost wished that I had met with them, because it was so overwhelming. It just caught me off guard and made me have a real sort of distaste for that because it was so extreme and so foreign that I didn’t enjoy it. I shied away from anything that I didn’t absolutely have to do. Everything just happened so fast and so dramatically that it allowed me to keep my distance.” And Christensen made some sacrifices for the films. Contractually obligated for five years, he once had to turn down a part in an Al Pacino movie in order to re-shoot a few scenes in Star Wars. “That really bummed me out,” he says. “When we wrapped, it was definitely bittersweet-I definitely enjoyed the sense of career freedom when they were over.” One of the projects Christensen took on afterwards was Factory Girl, with Sienna Miller, in which he gave a much-arraigned performance as Bob Dylan. “I wouldn’t mind talking a bit about that because that was not the performance I gave,” he says earnestly. Because of legal reasons Christensen’s character wasn’t called Dylan in the final cut. “I signed up to pay Bob Dylan and it’s a biopic. A true story,” he says. “I learned how to at least pretend to play the guitar and did a scene where I wrote a song and performed it. But later, because he threatened to sue, I had to go in and do ADR, redub my whole performance and change the way my character talked, because I has been doing the Dylan voice. I don’t know what’s onscreen in the end because I never saw it, but I do know it’s very different from what I did, and I was sort of pissed with the people who made the movie.” Far from lamenting his lack of privacy while attending exclusive parties at LAX and Cinespace, relaxing by pools of Hollywood’s most famous hotels, or perhaps grabbing a bite at the Ivy, Hayden Christensen just goes about his business 3000 miles away from all that and I’ve never met an actor who seems more at ease with their lot. “I think I do a pretty good job of staying out of tabloids. Paparazzi don’t come up to the farm ever,” he says. A lot of actors, though they complain about it, secretly relish the attention of the press, I suggest. “Absolutely, I’ve met a lot of them,” he says. “I always have an odd feeling about them. It’s like ‘I don’t know how you could really want that sort of change in your life.’ It’s really foreign to me. I don’t have a computer so I’m not exposed to any of the stuff on the internet. I can’t do that.” Suddenly from upstairs, I hear what sounds, unmistakably like an oink. Christensen hears it too. He smiles. “Oh don’t worry about that. It’s just my pigs.” There’s a scrabbling on the floor above-the unusual sound of trotters on polished wood. “I should probably go up and feed them,” he says, stubbing out his cigarette and stretching-it’s getting on a bit and he is hosting his family for dinner later. “Wanna come see?” Buddy and Petunia are a pair of pygmy pot-bellied piglets that Christensen acquired a few weeks earlier. (“I only wanted one, but apparently they get lonely”) and that are currently living upstairs in his house; running around in the hall, the spare bedroom, and the newly finished bathroom floor, upon which the four of us are now sitting. He leans over and rubs the tiles. “This wasn’t easy,” he says as Buddy climbs up onto his lap to be scratched behind the ears. “You have no idea how hard a simple pattern like this is to do. I cut the tiles myself!” “I feel really content,” he says. “I think for a while I was having a hard time enjoying the privileges I incurred from working and was pretty much living out of a suitcase. I’ve really enjoyed getting to collect toys and having a dirt bike that I can ride. And in my personal life I’m at a healthy place right now with my relationships [Christensen is dating Rachel Bilson whom he met on the set of Jumper]. I’ve done a lot of growing up since I was 19. I’ve learned a lot. And the more I learn the more I realize how little I know. Before, my agents and the people that I’m in contact with for my work wanted me to be something I wasn’t. They wanted me to pursue things I didn’t want to do, but now I feel more comfortable in my own skin.” “I don’t think I’ll ever have the desire to become something else and give up acting,” he continues. He glances out of the window; it’s dark now and his yard-skeletal trees pitched against the wind-is illuminated by Christmas lights wrapped around the fence. “You know there’s enough space down on the other side of the hill to put a landing strip for a little prop plane,” he says wistfully. Both pigs have now climbed onto him and are snuffling into his stomach. “I’m actually going to try and get a pilot’s license.” I read an interview with you from about five years ago in which you said it was a struggle to protect your integrity and dignity in this industry, I say. But you don’t seem to be struggling now. Holding Buddy up so they’re snout to nose, Christensen scrunches up his face to mimic the pig’s. “Well, I think that’s because I did struggle with it before,” he says putting the pig back on the floor, where it promptly falls over. “But now I’ve got no problem with telling them all to fuck off.”

#hayden christensen #nylon guys magazine interview #2008 interviews #interviews

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peacefulheartfarm · 4 years ago

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Raw Milk Cheese in Virginia

Today I’m going to review how to get raw milk cheese in Virginia via our herd share program. And, because I have lots of new listeners, I’m going to review our creamery project.

I do want to take a minute and say welcome to all the new listeners and welcome back to my veteran homestead loving regulars. Thank you so much for stopping by the FarmCast every week. I appreciate you all so much.

As always, there’s a lot going on and there is not nearly enough time in the day to get everything done. And as always, I love it. It’s so good to be alive.

Homestead Life Updates

We are finally getting a break from the heat. Rain has finally returned – at least for the time being. There is still quite a bit of summer left to go.

Herd Share Program

It has been a while since I talked about our Herd Share program. We offer you the opportunity to have your own part of our dairy herd. You too can experience what we are blessed with by virtue of operating our homestead. I know all of you cannot possibly do what we are doing, but you’d like to have the benefit of fresh dairy products from pasture raised cows.

The way you obtain raw milk cheese in Virginia is to purchase part of the herd and then simply pay a monthly boarding and maintenance fee and we will take care of everything else for you. On a weekly basis, you come to the farm and pick up your fresh milk products. We have butter and cheese year-round. During the active milking season we also have fresh, raw A2A2 milk and Yogurt.

We guarantee fresh milk from the first Saturday in May through the last Saturday in October. Sometimes we have milk earlier and sometimes it lasts longer into November. As I said earlier cheese and butter are available year-round. We have many members who are only in it for the cheese and butter.

If you are not familiar with A2A2 milk, I have a podcast on that topic titled, “What is A2A2 Milk?”. Link in the show notes. Or just go to our website (give web address), click or tap the podcast menu item and browse for it. It’s a way down the page as it was well over a year ago that I did that podcast.

The Area We Serve

For those of you out there listening to the sound of my voice, if you are in the southern/southwestern Virginia area or northern North Carolina area, we are here for you. It is about an hour trip from Winston-Salem, North Carolina and perhaps an hour and a half from Greensboro. In Virginia, Martinsville, Hillsville, and Galax are all less than an hour away. Wytheville is slightly over an hour. It takes us an hour and 10 minutes to get to the downtown Farmer’s Market. Roanoke is 2 hours from us. Floyd, Christiansburg and Blacksburg are somewhere in between.

Herd Share Pickups

We are open for on-farm sales and herd share pickups: Saturdays 3 - 5pm and Tuesdays 10am - 12pm. Come on out and get yourself some homestead sunshine. Take a look at how our animals are raised. We’ll answer all of your questions and make sure you get the best grass fed and finished beef, lamb and goat on the market today. Tuesdays 10am – 12 pm and Saturdays 3 – 5 pm.

Creamery

For new listeners I want to go over what we are doing with our creamery. My husband, Scott, is single-handedly building our USDA inspected dairy facility. It is a monstrous task. He has been doing the physical work on it for three and a half years. Long before that he was drawing up the plans. He was born with a hammer in his hand so he is very skilled at doing these drawings. We had long discussions about what we needed to include. The dairy inspector has been involved every step of the way. Many hours went into the design before the first bit of ground was dug up for the foundation.

Once it is complete, we will be able to offer our raw milk cheeses to the general public. Right now, it is only available via our herd share program that I just talked about. The milk, butter and yogurt will only ever be available via herd share. Unless and until the laws change in Virginia.

There are many different sections to the creamery building project. There is a barn, a milking parlor, a milk storage room, a full bath, the cheese make room, two cheese caves, a commercial kitchen and a storefront where I will do business with all of you.

Barn

The farthest away from my back door is the barn and animal loafing area. This is where we will collect the cows for milking. It is covered and will keep the donkeys out of the rain and snow. There is also a small area on the other of a wall from the stanchion platform. That will be used for various other aspects of animal husbandry.

Milking Stanchions and Milking Parlor

From the loafing area, the cows walk up four short steps to get to the stanchions. This area is set up with metal bars that keep the cows together and at the perfect angle for milking. The cows walk into the stanchions and eat a little snack while we are milking them. We are standing below them where the floor of the milking parlor and the rest of the building is about 2 and a half feet lower than the elevated barn floor.

Let’s do a virtual tour of the rest of the building. You are currently standing on the floor of the milking parlor. It is open and breezy. The design is one we saw at another dairy near us. They got the idea from a trip to New Zealand. Most milking parlors are closed in, dark, and humid. Ours has a roof but no sides. The air freely circulates.

Imagine you were facing the cows in their stanchions. Now turn around and face the other way. The rest of the creamery is now in front of you.

Milk Room

Directly in front of you is the doorway to the milk room. This is where the milk is stored. There is a direct pipeline from the milking parlor to the milk room. Its main feature is a large stainless-steel bulk milk tank. Our tank will hold up to 80 gallons of milk. The milk must be cooled quickly and this is the piece of equipment that makes that happen. In accordance with USDA inspection rules, it must be emptied, cleaned, and sanitized at least every three days.

Directly to your left would be the wall of the large cheese cave. There is no access from this side, called the dirty side. To the far left is a utility room. It holds the washer and dryer and the pipeline milking system. That thing is really loud. I’m glad it will be behind closed doors in the utility room.

Full Bath

You are still standing in the middle of the parlor floor. Directly to your right is a doorway to the clean side. Walking through the doorway, immediately on your right is a bathroom complete with shower. We will be able to come in dirty and sweaty from milking and take a quick shower and get into clean clothes before entering the “clean side”.

When you walk into this section the bathroom is on the right and in front of you is storage area for clean clothes, aprons, gloves, boots and so on that are used within the cheese make room. It is the ultimate in clean spaces. There are even pans of bleach water at various locations to keep the soles of boots clean and sanitized.

Cheese Make Room

Past the storage areas is the entrance to the cheese make room and a hard-right turn will lead to an entrance/exit door to the creamery on the right. We are going to enter the cheese make room. In here we find all of the tools and equipment used to make the cheese. A vat is the centerpiece. But there are lots of cheese forms or molds for shaping the curd. There are sinks and tables – all stainless steel. Shelves contain various sets of weight, measuring tools, and cleaning supplies. In the corner is the magnificent cheddar cheese press we special ordered from the Netherlands.

The floors have a tile with a special and very expensive grout that will hold up to the acid pH of the cheese whey. It empties out of the vat directly onto the floor and flows down to a floor drain in the corner.

The Cheese Caves

After entering the room, turn left and walk all the way across the room to the exit door. It leads to a common area between the cheese caves and the kitchen. Directly in front of you is the door to the small cheese cave. To the left is the door into the large cheese cave. To the right is an open doorway to the commercial kitchen area.

The raw milk cheese caves are heavily insulated rooms that will maintain specific temperatures and humidity. We are currently using the small cave to age the cheeses we are making for our herd share members. It is complete except for electricity. Scott has something rigged up that works quite well for the humidifier, a small lamp, the window air conditioner and Cool Bot. The Cool Bot is an electronic device that fools the air conditioner into thinking it is warmer than it actually is so the air conditioner will continue to run. Most won’t cool a room below 60 degrees. But with a Cool Bot we can get our temperature down to the low 50’s which is ideal for aging cheese. The small humidifier keeps the humidity well over 70% and sometimes as high as 83%. I’d like to get it to go higher. Still working on that detail.

The large cheese cave will be similarly equipped and has enough space to house an entire year’s worth of cheese. Some of our cheeses need at least 8 or 9 months to reach a decent maturity and will only get better with time.

Commercial Kitchen

Standing in that entry alcove, large cave on the left, small cave in front of you, turn right into the commercial kitchen. You can see yet another entrance/exit door. It’s not there yet, but you will eventually see a large stove to the left of the door and a triple sink to your left against that wall. Stainless steel tables will be in the middle of the room. Freezers and refrigerators will be lined along the wall opposite of the door. A window above the chest freezers will give visitors a view into the cheese make room.

Far to the right you will see the door to the storefront. And that is the last room in the building. Of course, it also has an entrance/exit door. This door is where you guys would enter the building to pick up product. Another window here that looks into the cheese make area.

When it is finally complete, we will have an open house for you all to come and see how it all turned out. Classes in cheesemaking and food preservation will also be a time where you all can see the final creation. And if you are a herd share owner, weekly and/or monthly visits bring you even more access to all of it.

That went a little longer than I originally intended but I get so excited when I’m talking about our creamery. I want everyone to know how wonderful this project is and what a wonderful job Scott is doing to bring our dreams to life.

How about some homestead updates on the animals, gardens and orchard.

Animals

All of the animals are doing well, even in the heat. The cows produce slightly less milk on really hot days, but for the most part they are doing a splendid job of producing milk and otherwise munching lazily on grass all day.

The calves are getting bigger every day. Luna’s eye is healed and it looks like she will have permanent scarring on her eyeball. We now have the flies under control and do not foresee any future issues with pink eye.

We are down to just two bulls being raised for meat. I called the meat processor today to get them scheduled. It will be October 2021 before they can be processed. There are still hiccups in the food supply chain due to the virus. It looks like it is going to take quite a while to get that flow back to normal. The overflow from the closure or reduction of service from large processing plants keeps overwhelming smaller, custom processing operations used by small farmers.

The goats and sheep are also doing very, very well. I am pleased that we have had no issues with lambs this year. It is the first time in our history on this homestead that we have come this far without losing a single lamb. A 70% to 80% survival rate is much more common for us.

I noticed the coats on the donkeys are really glossy today. Probably a month ago they finally shed all of their winter coat. Quite often they roll in the dirt and dull their coats, but we had rain last night and they were particularly glossy this morning.

Garden

The heat has kept me busy watering the garden. I don’t know if I mentioned this in prior podcasts, but I hope to have drip irrigation in place next year. We keep improving our gardens each year and I think it is time for the automatic watering system to get going again. We had it working for a couple of years, but we have not reconstructed it since the entire garden was redesigned four years ago.

The peppers, tomatoes and sunflowers are the centerpieces of the garden at the moment. Many of the sunflowers have bloomed. They are gorgeous. The tomato plants are loaded with green tomatoes. I saw an orange one this morning I will have to go our there later and see if there are others. The peppers are producing well. Some of the peppers are smaller than I think they should be and I believe that is due to not enough fertilizing. I need to step up my game in that arena.

Well now that I think on it, the basil, oregano and thyme are also worth note. I took an oregano leaf to Scott the other day and let him smell it and identify it. Don’t you just love the smell of fresh basil and oregano? I’ll be drying some of that for use this winter.

Orchard

A lot of the blackberries are getting eaten by the birds. There is a ground hog hole in there also. He is probably taking advantage as well. Scott went out there with the chain saw and cut a path between the rows. I might have mentioned that last time. He started last week and just yesterday finished all of the rows. I can freely pick berries now. But there is still so much that needs to happen with cleaning up those rows of blackberries. Now that I have a clear path, I foresee the final clean up happening much later. In the fall or perhaps even in the winter.

The strawberries are completely overrun with weeds. I have a task on my calendar that says, “weed the strawberries”. It also says it is four weeks overdue. Do you have any idea how many weeds have taken over in four weeks? It’s a lot. There are far more weeds than strawberry plants. Looking on the bright side, the larger weeds are much easier to pull up all at once. And with just a little work, it makes a very big dent. Feeling you have accomplished something is very easy when you see the earth where previously it was covered in large green things with lots of stickers.

Final Thoughts

That’s it for today’s podcast. I hope you enjoyed the tour of the creamery. It’s good to review how far we have come every once in a while. If you looking for raw milk cheese in Virginia or nearby, I hope you’ll consider joining our herd share program. We make really fine cheese and our milk is rich, nutritious and, best of all, delicious. The butter I make is the best I have ever tasted and I have had other grass-fed raw milk butters. Mine is superb. You won’t find this kind of quality and flavor anywhere else.

If you enjoyed this podcast, don’t forget to subscribe via iTunes or your favorite podcast listening app. Also, please share this podcast with any of your friends or family who might be interested in this type of content.

Thank you so much for listening and until next time, may God fill your life with grace and peace.

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anneedmonsonus · 5 years ago

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Our Tiny Ensuite Bathroom Renovation – Seven Years Later

It’s been a while between posts, online friends. Time feels like it has flown past lately. When we all had to stay at home, the mornings and evenings felt a little slower, but the days still rushed past – and are still rushing past. I wonder if that’s normal for everyone who has kids? With two, it feels like the days go by at triple the speed.

I still can’t get over how fast the school days go by, either. Every day I drop Little Nerd at pre-primary (and Miss Nerd at day care, now that she is back to going two days a week) and I mentally plan out all the things I want to get done – I’ll answer emails, work, run, shower (goodness) do the grocery shop, tidy the house, maybe run a couple of errands – and am generally lucky to achieve three of those things. If anyone has any time-saving tips for maximising time with children, I’d be all ears! In a time when lots of people have lost income, I’ve also been grateful to be doing a little bit more work for the Sunday Times Magazine lately with a new column called Inside Story – a look at how Perth creatives and small business owners have been faring and adapting since COVID-19. I’ve been enjoying writing it but lately in general I’ve felt a bit more scattered, on some days downright foggy, that on some days no amount of exercise and coffee has been able to fix. Something that should only take me half an hour takes two. At first I thought, is this just me being weird? But I don’t think it is – I think it’s how a lot of people feel at the moment, a bit imbalanced and less focused than usual. Anyway, something has had to give lately, and unfortunately for me it has been blogging, and even posting on Instagram.

But, today I’m prioritising House Nerd (Full disclosure: I haven’t showered yet today. FERAL. Doing it for you guys cos I love you. Yes, I promise I’ll shower before I see the other parents at school pickup). And today, I want to share a post on our ensuite makeover – seven years after we renovated it. Because I know a lot of you wouldn’t have seen this when I shared it originally.

When we moved here, this was one of the first rooms we renovated properly – and by this I mean a full gut and retile. It was an old 70s bathroom with original brown tiles with pink roses on them. It was, well, not very nice – the kind of old bathroom where no matter how well you’ve tried to clean it, it just never FEELS clean. (This is my old post here, where you can see all of our ‘befores’). But in this post, I’ll share the photos I took today. And some gross befores, because everyone loves gross befores…… well I do.

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE

AFTER

BEFORE. I know. We didn’t even properly replace the toilet roll for your visit. That’s how much of an energy drain this crappy bathroom was back then.

AFTER

We completely gutted it and replaced everything and I shared it then here. Mr Nerd and I were total newbies to renovating, and we both agree that since then we have learned a LOT about renovating through our experiences and mistakes, and if we were to do another house now, we think we’d probably approach a lot of things differently.

My personal taste now is also pretty different to my taste seven years ago. But when we look back on how we did this bathroom, I still feel good about it.

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As you can see, it is a SMALL ensuite. It is 1.75 metres by 1.75 metres (about 3m square or 30 square feet). The shower space is about 85cm x 85cm. Our house is a three by two, but when we were house-hunting, I remember seeing marketing material for the house that had it as a three by one.

Maybe it was an error. Or maybe it was clever marketing. Because I remember being at the first home open for the House Formerly Known as the Crap Shack, poking around in the main bedroom and going, “Oh wow, there’s another bathroom!” Which maybe I guess is preferential to being told a house has two bathrooms but then you open the door of the second bathroom and you’re disappointed cos it’s the smallest bathroom you’ve ever seen? I don’t know. Isn’t it nicer to NOT be expecting a bathroom and then you open a door and ta-da! Bonus bathroom! Like I said, maybe it was a mistake, but despite its lack of floor space, that Bonus Bathroom still scored some points at my end. Take my money, real estate agency. Yes, all of my money.

One day I’ll stop doing an awkward peace sign in photos.

Speaking of money. I shared on the blog (this is back in 2013) how much this bathroom renovation cost.

After, I got a few emails from people who said it was impossible to renovate a bathroom for under $8,000. Reading a little between the lines of those disgruntled emails, I’m guessing they were people in the industry who didn’t want their work devalued, for want of a better word, or to have potential clients coming to them saying, “Well how come my quote for a bathroom renovation comes to $12,000 but House Nerd girl’s bathroom reno only cost $8,000?” Which is totally understandable. In their defence, if you go to a professional renovation company or an interior designer, you’re paying for their experience, their speed, their trusted trades, things like their discounts from tile companies, the ease, the lack of risk (like no design mistakes… well – hopefully!) When you project manage it on your own, you’re taking a risk. By no means was I out to upset anyone by sharing our bathroom renovation or by breaking down what we paid for it.

However, as I pointed out (and as I had stated in my posts, but I’m not sure if they actually read them) they would have seen that we saved money in more than a few ways – we did some work ourselves to save costs, like we gutted it ourselves, we had a tiler friend who slowly worked on it on his weekends (obviously with a second bathroom, there was no rush).

I remember this dark winter night way back when – I think this was when the grouting was being done. Odd how in restrospect all those days of renovating that dragged into the night seem like fun now!

We bought all our fixtures from the same plumbing store that we really like (some will give you a discount if you do this) and it’s also a VERY small room – even though we used nice finishes like the travertine, of course you’re going to save when you don’t need that much. So can you renovate a bathroom for under $8,000 these days? I don’t know. But there are always ways to save if you really want to. If you want to save money you have to prioritise what you really want, and put time in to hunt around for what you want.

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Anyway. Almost eight years later, we’re still happy with this tiny room, and (to me, anyway) it hasn’t dated – everything as looks as good as it did when it was first done. We love the travertine most of all – the occasional upkeep of natural stone is worth it to us. Although it’s a tiny room, the natural stone makes it a feel a tiny bit special. I like the hob in the shower – hubby built a brick wall and then it was rendered and tiled, and it gives us a space to put bottles in the shower.

Products from Urban Skincare Co. We discovered this brand while staying in our Camperdown accommodation in Sydney (the same accommodation with the REALLY BIG SHOWER, which I’ll tell you about in just a sec) and we both liked this stuff so much we ordered a box when we got home.

I still like the white walls (it’s hard to see in the photos, but they are fully tiled in white rectified wall tiles, where the grout lines are so thin you can barely seen them) the custom-made vanity with Polytec doors, the Corian benchtop. Corian is an awesome material, and still feels kind of underrrated. It’s hardwearing and durable and has lots of nice colours. Once I left a can of hairspray on the benchtop, and the bottom of the can got wet and left a rust mark – you just buff it out and you can’t even tell.

Plant and planter from No Vo’s Home Nursery. You can buy Savon de Marseille olive oil soap from Hard to Find. Chloe from David Jones.

In hindsight, we might have done a few things differently, though. I would have insisted on paying more for the electrics so that when you turn the lights on, the exhaust fan doesn’t HAVE to go on.

I also might have put in a medicine cabinet above the toilet for a little bit more storage. If we were remodelling this same house now, we’d be more inclined to be a little bit more confident and think a little bit bigger.

This felt like enough at the time.

Sometimes we think it would have been better to forgo our walk-in robe (which sits alongside the ensuite) knock down the wall in-between the robe and ensuite, and instead create a bigger ensuite, then add a wall of robes into our bedroom instead. It’s such a simple luxury to have a spacious shower – we went on holidays last year and stayed in a self-contained apartment in Camperdown, and all four of us were basically awed by how big the shower was (yes, we are easily thrilled). But it was bigger than our entire ensuite! With double shower heads so we don’t have to fight over who gets to stand directly under the nozzle! Such decadence!

But, at the time, I wasn’t quite convinced it would be the best way to go, because our bedroom, too, is small, and adding a walk-in robe would have greatly eaten into the space (and doing the renovation this way would have cost more, in terms of additional labour, trades, materials and moving plumbing).

There you go! Have you ever renovated a room and thought to yourself down the track you might have done it very differently? Would love to know. Maya x

The post Our Tiny Ensuite Bathroom Renovation – Seven Years Later appeared first on House Nerd.

from Home Improvement https://house-nerd.com/2020/06/05/our-tiny-ensuite-reno/

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ecotone99 · 5 years ago

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[SF] C. elegans

C. Elegans

Story by jules324

What I remember most clearly from that night are the curtains in the hospital room. That strange white speckled with blue and pink indiscriminate designs; like some sort of Rorschach test. The more you stare at the pattern, the more the images dance and meld together, creating entirely new shapes. My brain tried to create some context, tried to weed through the information and form a narrative.

“Do you know where you are?”

A voice came at me from the right — probably some ad for cheap vacation tickets. Masked as people, advertisements had gotten so intrusive. I had no desire to sit on a beach chair taking selfies. I changed my status to “offline”.

A strange smell was stuck to me, reminiscent of burnt toast. It was so strong I could taste it; thick on my tongue, clogging my throat. The sterile smell of rubbing alcohol tried to cut its way through.

“We only have access to your username. What’s the name on your birth certificate?”

A voice from the left. Deeper. A man’s. He clearly isn’t respecting my offline notification. Men like that give me the creeps. I regularly block or report them. Usually, they try to get in with a simple, “Hey.” Other times, they’re a bit more straightforward, interjecting with their dick wagging out of their pants. Or, as of late, menacing suggestions of one of several inhumane things they’d like to do before screwing me. Asking for my name is a bold move, though…

I reached up to remove my VR headset, only to realize it’s not there.

I have three different usernames, and a fourth left over from high school. I use them to log into everything. To purchase items, listen to music, play online, interact with people. Sometimes, it takes a moment to remember my real name.

They say if someone really wants to find out something about you, it’s available on the internet. They just have to hunt for it. That’s why we were warned not to give away personal information online before we were taught anything else.

Before multiplication tables, before The Odyssey, before biology and US History.

That’s Lesson #1.The “stranger danger” of my generation.

“She’s in shock. Get her information later.”

I don’t like whoever these intruders are.

“Hold her still.”

A strange fear was slipping through me; something was off. My heart started pounding in my chest, desperately trying to push its way out of its cavity, break through my ribs, tear the skin, rip me open like a doll. At this point, I wasn’t even certain whether organs would come out, or stuffing. Finally, a nurse walked into my peripheral vision and seamlessly injected a sedative into my arm.

I slid. I kept sliding deeper and deeper into black, as if someone had switched off the game.

Have you ever heard of C. elegans?I hadn’t either until recently.They’re a fairly simple type of worm used extensively in scientific studies of neurobiology. Whereas humans have around 100 billion neurons, C. elegans have 302. When faced with food scarcity, as a method of self-preservation, their bodies shut down and they enter an immobile, depression-like state.

We humans are in a state of scarcity.Dire official warnings, some from the NIH, some from the CDC, were issued, only to be relegated by algorithms to the bottom of news sites, just above “15 ways to refinance your home”, or “which celebrities are secretly broke.”

The cause of this scarcity, they warn, is a lack of touch. The things that drove us to connect, to reproduce, to bond, no longer give us the thrills they once did.The tech companies understood this.

They figured out what piques our reward centers. They pushed us to want more, designed games and scenarios in which what we’ve been wired to need over the course of 30 million years of evolution was no longer enough.

Holed up in our living quarters, interacting with others only online, in chat rooms, through our avatars — the Beauty filter smoothing out our imperfections — we isolated ourselves further and further.

Don’t get me wrong… it’s exciting.

Online, you can be a better version of yourself. You can say the things you could never say in public. You have others around you who feel similarly, speak similarly. You live in a lawless world where your id can run rampant.

It’s intoxicating.

I’ve been sober for almost a year now and the world still feels a little muted. But finally being back made me realize what I was missing most.I’m just a human looking for another human to hold me; to touch me.That.Fuck, that’s what I miss most of all. I miss human touch. I crave it. I dream about it. I close my eyes, the black sucking me in, and I project pleasant images. The memories from my past have been viewed so many times, they’re barely usable; like track marks on a junkie.

The image of my finger running its way along the back of her arm, goosebumps growing and raising around my fingertip; her arm hair sticking up on end; a smile tugging at the left side of her lips; my lips mimicking hers; our faces in sync; a hand, palm down, placed gently below my shoulder blade.

The weight of it. The type of pressure that can only be applied by another human attuned to your desires.There’s something exciting about feeling someone else’s skin against a part of your body that’s impossible to reach, and thus, rarely touched.

All of that.I wake up aching for it.In the end; in my most basic form, I’m just a person looking for her person.And as anyone after Gen-X can attest — it’s really fucking hard.

After a surprisingly short trial, and a stint in a hospital, I was given a court-ordered mandate requiring me to attend VRA meetings.

I enjoyed going to my meetings. They were one of the few times I didn’t have to make a concerted effort to interact with people. Weekly, I would walk through the heavy wooden doors opening out into a large room. The mismatched chairs were set up in a circular fashion, meant to show we’re all equals; as if they honestly believed we weren’t secretly judging one another, using other’s indiscretions as a point of reference to see where we fall on the spectrum of abusive to mildly addicted.

I preferred the chair closest to the window. It was one of the few with seat padding that hadn’t yet burst through. If I ever arrived late and my spot was taken, an irrational, child-like anger ran up my body like heartburn. I forced myself to quickly quell the fire. In reality, not everything is how I design it. I had to accept that.

On this particular evening, a pale-faced woman with large eyes and short wavy hair that curled around the base of her neck, was sitting in my seat. Her eyes scanned every person in the room, as if creating a narrative around our pasts, furrowing out our stories.

I retreated to a tall backed chair and grumpily sat in resentful silence; my gaze burning holes in the woman’s espadrilles.

“I would like to begin the meeting with our serenity prayer”, the VRA leader started. Other voices quickly joined in, like a sleepy congregation responding to a chaplain’s sermon.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and…”

Through one quarter closed eye, I watched the pale-faced woman as we chanted in unison. Both her eyes were open, and her lips were imperceptibly moving. She looked around at the other members, with her head slightly bowed. Her eyes narrowed as she dwelled on certain characters, her story about us growing more vivid.

Finally, her eyes met mine. Realizing her misstep, she closed both eyes and mouthed the words with more enthusiasm.

“Thank you”, the VRA leader said. The group exhaled as we settled into our chairs, shifting our feet to try and break the discomfort.

Most are ashamed in some form or another, not necessarily because of how they behaved in Virtual Reality, but because their behaviors were noticed. They had made a misstep in the world, or hadn’t hidden their compulsion well enough. Some described the scenarios they had created — the affairs they’d had, how many days they went without leaving their apartment, the Incel meetings, how they learned to load and fire an AR-15 with exquisite accuracy by playing Call of Duty for a summer.

Weird shit like that.

“Would anyone like to share any experiences from this past week? Interactions with other humans?” The VRA leader looked around the room, making purposeful eye contact with everyone, a move that usually caused additional shifting of feet and hands. On this evening, User779 —

“Wonderful, thank you, Steve”. — Steve — decided to contribute. Steve’s clothes comprise of a basic color palette, off-white sneakers, the sole of one foot torn back from the front. His defining feature is the unmistakable smell of stove grease. I’ve sat next to him several times. The smell always reminded me of a diner close to the 11 a.m. turnover from breakfast to lunch — the grill burning off the last of the eggs and oil.

Steve took a long, deep breath, inflating the top half of his body, preparing himself, and exhaled with a grunt.

“This week I, uhh, took the bus over to the park, down by the water.” Steve said, directing this at the grout in between the tiles in front of his feet.

“No…?”, the VRA leader gently encouraged.

“No music, no earbuds, no headset. Nothing.” Steve nodded each point as if to drive it home.

The people around the room passively listened, more than likely reviewing their week. Had they transgressed? What was the definition of a transgression? If you spent hours with your eyes closed imagining your old world, is that just as bad as putting a headset on and being in it? Will your days reset if you admit the truth? Or will the judge rescind your sentence in favor of some harsher punishment?

“It was quiet. Or… it was loud, I guess. But different ’cause I couldn’t control any of the noises separately.”

“How did that make you feel?”

Steve huffed at the question the VRA leader posed.It was the question we all hated, because we all knew it was the only question the VRA leader was allowed to ask.

“Angry”, Steve shot out. The increased decibels caused the muscles in my ears to tense, protecting my ear drums from the unnecessarily aggressive noise.

Others around him nodded in agreement. The lack of control over one’s environment is one of the biggest initial frustrations when getting clean.

“There just wasn’t…” Steve scrunched his face together trying to squeeze the words out. “Enough happening, you know? Like, the park was pretty. But… so what?”

The pale-faced woman across from me furrowed her brow, the creases between her eyebrows deepening. She tugged at her bottom lip, as if trying to tease out an answer to some question.

She didn’t have any of the telltale signs of an addict: the unmistakable marks around the eyes, a mixture of exhaustion and plastic impressions reminiscent of the little indents people who wear glasses get on the bridge of their nose. Her fingers didn’t inadvertently move, trying to encourage some action in front of her. In fact, she seemed strangely balanced. Her world moved in orbit at regular speed and in regular rotation. To her, the universe was obeying the laws of physics, as it always had done.

Jess volunteered next. She had applied for a job as a waitress in a restaurant chain with kitschy outfits and birthday sombreros. Her interactions with the interviewer were stiff.

Jess felt removed from him in a way she hadn’t when she was immersed in her VR world. She felt as though she had become two different people. The one before and after VR was awkward and shy. She was capable of shame. She came to that realization when she was asked about the significant break in her resume.

“People sit across from me now and look at me as if I was just sitting on my couch all day fucking around with video games. They don’t understand what it’s like.”

A lot of VR addicts feel this. The DSM only recently included “VR addiction” in its list of mental disorders, but the reality of the addiction still seemed like a joke. Many refused to believe that something so ubiquitous, that allowed for the exploration of destinations we might never afford to visit, that fabricated social “connection” without physical presence, that “brought our world closer together”, could be harmful.

As the room opened up and settled into the comfort of people telling similar sordid tales, the darker stuff came out.

“The sheets were all messed up. I’m guessing someone had been in there right before me, but I didn’t really care. I fucked her, my hand pushing her face into the mattress. I could feel her mouth move below my palm, I guess to scream or something, but I didn’t move it.”

I looked around the room, there were other similarly disgusted faces. You hear this shit and you want to hit the person.

“In my defense — ”, Mike shot back quickly, taking in the looks of those around him. “I hadn’t even touched a woman in years. I didn’t even remember what it felt like; I got caught up.”

People shifted their gaze, not wanting to acknowledge that at some point, after copious amounts of alone time and VR porn, they too had thought about walking across the hall, knocking on the apartment door, and engaging in some aggressive, explicit sexual act accompanied by unrealistic noises so loud, that their downstairs neighbor would think someone is being murdered.

I had heard stories of Mike’s addiction proclivities before. Each time, he added some color to his more horrific acts. Some studies say lack of empathy and lack of touch go hand in hand. That might explain some of the reactions in this room.

Any well-adjusted human would probably have left to throw up in a toilet by now. But we all sat there staring at our shoes.

Across from me, the pale-faced woman’s gaze had settled to the window behind her. The bridge of her nose wrinkled before she turned back to the room. Her eyes were glassy and somber. They met mine, and in that moment I felt sorry for her.

“Jia, you haven’t shared”, the VRA leader prodded me.

Slowly, the rest of the room looked up at me, overcoming their self-indulgent guilt to focus once more on someone else’s shame.

I leaned forward in my chair. If I had moved a centimeter further, I would have toppled onto the ground. The distraction may have provided me an excuse to leave, or at least buy me some time. In the year I have been here, I have shared the bare minimum. A feeling of disgust crawled through me whenever I thought of discussing my experiences with the people here. I knew I deserved to be in VRA, but I didn’t think I necessarily deserved to be thrown in with this lot.

“Yeah, sure.” I said, settling my elbows on my knees, my spine curved in a catlike position. “My parents won’t see me…”, I started, but immediately dropped this line of thinking.

I still can’t quite figure out what my parents think of me. That’s the frustrating part about returning to reality. You feel shame and embarrassment. Your actions have consequences once again. I’ve regained a number of feelings I didn’t have to worry about in years, along with the ability to guess the emotions of others.

“They’re still not sure what happened, or when the dividing point was between ‘normal’ and ‘abnormal’ behavior. They’re not sure where I am on this spectrum anymore.”

“How did that make…”

“…you feel?”, I finished his sentence with an eye-roll, earning a snicker from several members.

“Sad. Because I don’t think I’m actually capable of doing the thing I was charged with. I can’t prove that it was VR induced. Previous lawsuits against VR companies have been thrown out, so, I’m on my own. My parents think I am that person. You know?”

I directed this question at the VRA leader, hoping he’d drop his, “how does that make you feel?” bullshit and offer some real advice.

“Does anyone have anything they’d like to add to that?”

I sighed and leaned back in my chair. The pale-faced woman looked at me, a sudden awareness touching several muscles so as to contort her face.

“That’s the thing, though, isn’t it? You pacify family by kicking VR. You no longer have online people in your life anymore, which is good. But then you don’t really have anyone.” In an uncharacteristically self-reflective way, Willow described the simple conclusion at the bottom of the equation for all former addicts.

After each meeting, I often stay behind to tidy up. Everyone else bolts for the door, as if they have people to see or a life to get back to, whereas I am actively avoiding my next stop for the evening.

I languidly closed the folding chairs and set them against the wall, the backs of each slipping into the one in front, savoring the remaining moments of silence. The dark oak walls around me were comforting. They closed in like a warm blanket on a cold night, holding me there.

Across from me, tossing away used cups of coffee and crumbs from snacks half-heartedly brought, was the pale-faced woman. Her presence still irked me.

I approached the table, combative.

“First session, or just here for fun?”

The woman dusted off her hands into the nearby garbage bin.

“First session.” She said.

Behind her, several members were heading towards the door. She followed their movement with a pursed lip smile. From halfway down the table, I tossed a used cup into the trash next to her, causing her to jump. She was intruding on my territory and she knew it.

“How long have you been here?” She asked as she picked up another plate.

“11 months.” I said, giving her a sense of my status in the hierarchy of former addicts.

The pale-faced woman moved closer to me, nodding once more. Her lips pursed again, but no smile followed.

“Was it easy to accept?” She ventured further, testing my limits.

“Acceptance is irrelevant. I was given a lenient sentence.”

By now the table was almost entirely cleared; soon, we would have to leave. I tried to hold onto the conversation for longer. Any delay is welcome.

“Hearing people’s stories. What we’ve done…” She started, sweeping her hand across the folding table’s now crumb free plastic covering.

“It resonates”, she concluded this thought, with several nods.

“In a sick way.” I added.

The pale-faced woman looked up at me. Her eyes were hazel; specks of brown rimming the green; they held my dark brown eyes. I felt a lurch inside me.

In that moment, I realized I so rarely look anyone in the face, and if I do, I focus on the cheekbones, bridge of the nose, eyebrows, but never the eyes. There was something torturous about eyes, they creeped into you, they tore at you, broke you down.

Her eyes shifted away; I felt their hold release me. My breathing returned to normal.

“I’m sure when they designed this, they imagined games and stronger relationships.”

“Right”, I added sarcastically. “If we just sit on our couch and swipe furiously enough until our phone screens are blurred with take-out grease, we can weed out all the ‘wrong ones’ and find that ‘right one’; the one that checks every box in our journal.”

Oddly, she seemed to be taking this to heart.

“They move fast and break things. All the while, they leave minds fractured by the wayside. Immobile and alone.” I concluded.

Her eyes returned to mine, glossy once more.

“Sorry.” I acquiesced. “Sometimes I can be a grump.”

She moved again, this time a single, conclusive nod.

“C. elegans.” She said with an uncomfortable smile. “I’m Nell.” She added, the corner of her lips pulled up to show me she was of no danger to me.

“Jia.”

She looked to the table, as if to say ‘that’s it’. She stepped forward, gently grabbed my forearm down near the wrist and gave it a squeeze.

“I’ll see you next week.”

The further my wrist slipped into the palm of her hand the more it burned; a slow burn. Chills ran so far up my body, I could feel them in my temples. My entire being begged her to keep holding on, but within moments, her fingers slid back round again and into her pockets.

All I can remember is a wave, then her left leg disappearing out of sight, followed by the right as she slipped through the great oak door.Paralyzed, I stood in the empty room.

My arm still burned as I walked down Olympic Place. I pushed up the left sleeve of my jacket, certain that if I looked down at my wrist, I would see the fading imprint of her fingers. In the glow of the streetlights, I could see no marks. I ran my fingers over my arm in a similar fashion, mimicking her touch, desperately hoping to feel that jolt once again; the plummet of heart to stomach, tensing of muscles, the wave of euphoria. But it was gone. Not even the faintest ripple remained.

Upon realizing this feeling would now be nothing more than a memory, added to the collection of fantasies to draw upon, I sunk deep into myself. The drop was so dramatic and jarring, that the only appropriate reaction would be to step off the curb into oncoming traffic.

My foot creeped out over the lip of the concrete, reaching out for the mirrored puddle in front of me.The blare of a car horn.

I swung my leg back to meet the other safely on the sidewalk. A car zipped by, kicking up rainwater, whipping it around the tire like a broken ferris wheel.Pay attention.Here it’s possible to die.

I walked through an empty parking lot to the grocery store. The store was almost entirely lifeless. My steps echoed on the linoleum floors. I turned a corner and in front of me was the most overwhelming sight. Half an aisle dedicated entirely to peanut butter. The selection included everything you could ever want: the mixed butters, the organics, the trashy cheap kind. You had your almonds — smooth and chunky — walnut butters in both low-fat and low-sodium. Sometimes, being in the world was exhausting. At least online, your choice was predicted for you.

Tipping up on my toes, I reached out and grabbed the full fat, generic smooth. I find it hard to justify spending $15 on a jar of fancy peanut butter. He tends to like the idea of peanut butter more than the physical sensation of eating it, anyway.

Peanut butter stashed securely in my jacket pocket, I walked past a fenced-in portion of land. The sign stapled up against thin wooden boards boasted a new condominium of affordable housing units. The hospital towered over the construction site, its brightly lit windows beacons shining through the post rain fog. It drew me in. Rain or shine, it always felt like this. An impending feeling of dread. This was one of the best and worst parts of my week.

With a jagged noise, the hospital doors pulled open for me as I neared. The same colorful fake flowers in the lobby always greeted me. It was nice they tried to make the place seem friendlier, but at the end of the day, a hospital is still a hospital. A lobby guard swiped my I.D. and I was given a visitor’s pass with temporary permission to walk the halls.

The elevator zipped up to the 5th floor. As I turned along the corridor, the familiar sign indicating the “burn recovery unit” greeted me.

As I entered the room, I was startled by the voice of his nurse.

“Jeez!”

“Shit. I’m sorry. I thought he was alone.”

Laying down on the bed was my friend. Next to him was his nurse, come to change his bandages.

“You gonna leave the jar this time, or throw it out?” The nurse asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice.

I didn’t like that she was intruding on our weekly ritual. This time was sacred to me.

“I’ll remember this time,” I said flatly. I followed up with a quick, “Sorry”, just in case she decided that visiting hours were suddenly over.

“You in it?” I nodded my question at my friend. After a beat, he responded.

“Yeah.”

That usually was about as much as I could get out of him while his headset was on. It annoyed me. Sometimes I wonder if that’s what people used to think about me when they would try to engage me in conversation.

Sensing some tension, the nurse chimed in again, “He’s hiking in the Arctic right now. I haven’t been there, but from the description on the box, it looks like it takes intense concentration… and a warm winter jacket.”

The nurse smiled at her joke. It made me hate her more. But, as long as he’s distracted, I’m happy.

As I moved further into the room, the rest of his body became visible. You know how everyone has their own distinct smell? His had changed. It took a while to get used to, but it’s beginning to feel like him.

The bandage changing process is a particularly cruel one, but it has to be done. I’ve only seen it happen two or three times. Once before his headset, the rest after. VR caused my pain; VR eased his.

There’s some debate as to whether it’s better for a patient to quickly pull the wrapping off — like a bandaid — or slowly.

The nurse decided on the slow route, every now and again looking up to his mouth for a wince or clench of his jaw.

I swiped the biodegradable spoon from his untouched food tray and plopped down in the seat next to his bed. Everything was easier on this side. From this angle, he still resembled the man I’d run into in the hallways; a casual conversation as we fiddled with our keys. This side is where I spent most of my visitation time.

“Peanut butter?”

A half smile caused his headset to tilt upwards.

“My throats a little dry today.”

I unscrewed the cap, and helped myself. Thank god I didn’t spend the 15 bucks. The likelihood that he will take his headset off hovers somewhere around zero, so I ventured forward…

“I spent 15 bucks on this, one of us is going to enjoy it.” There’s something homey and childlike about peanut butter. It always reminded me of the PB&J’s you’d get in the cafeteria at school; the crust hardening after a day sitting underneath the plastic wrap.

“Anything wild happen around here today?” I asked.

No response. His smile had slid back down again; his lips pursed.

“He needs to concentrate. You feel the cold much more when you really play along.”

“That works for everyone?” I asked.

“Said to reduce pain by up to 50%. Haven’t seen a patient turn down a headset yet.”

The nurse continued to pull back the bandages. I watched in morbid fascination. It looked nothing like skin anymore, though the crusted blood suggested otherwise. His arms looked like twisted plastic, like an action figure melted by some sadistic child.

I found myself looking at his feet, detailing the way his toes had practically fused together. It reminded me of that old N64 game, Golden Eye, in the days before designers made hands with separate digits.I felt sick.Focus on the details. That’s how you’ll know it’s real and not virtual.

I stared at my spoon — at how the lick lines ran up the residual peanut butter. The edges were moist from my saliva, giving the brown an off-color, whitish hue.

As much as we like to praise our designers for all they’ve done, they’re really shit about the details.

The nurse gently removed another bandage. It clung to the skin. If you listened carefully enough, you could hear the tear of the wrapping.With each pull, I flinched.

It’s impossible to believe that the weight of knowing your addiction harmed another human would ever go away.

End.

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endlessarchite · 6 years ago

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The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again

Tiling was one of the most daunting tasks on our duplex to-do list this year (four bathrooms! two mudrooms! and there are still two backsplashes on the list) so it’s a HUGE relief to say that all of those floors and showers and tub surrounds are officially done (well, like 95% done – more on that later). So today we wanted to show you how they’ve all turned out and share some of the lessons we learned along the way, including which tiles we’d buy again in a heartbeat… and the ones we’d think twice about attempting ever again.

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

Listeners of last week’s podcast know that after two long weekends spent tiling the duplex, we completed all six of the floors ourselves (two mudrooms and four bathrooms!) but we decided to hire out the four remaining shower surrounds in order to keep things on schedule. What would’ve taken me and Sherry several more weekends to accomplish was knocked out by our contractor’s crew in less than a week. For each of the four shower/tub surrounds we chose white subway tile for the walls (simple, classic, affordable, and it’s a tile that falls back and won’t compete with the bolder patterned floor tile that we chose for each room). So this post is mostly going to focus on the floors in each space since we’ve covered our adventures in subway tile here and here already.

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

But as for the subway tile we used, we went with this affordable 3 x 6″ subway tile installed in a standard running bond pattern (the same stuff we used and loved on the beach house’s kitchen backsplash). And the two master showers got this white herringbone on the floor, which added a hint of interest to that surface without being too crazy busy.

We showed you all of the floor tile selections in this post about how we chose our tile, cabinets, and paint colors. But we did make one last minute change to the plan from that post: we swapped the two master bathroom tile choices (seen in the two photos above) because the marble-looking tile ended up pairing better with the blue-green doors than the pink ones. As much planning as you do beforehand, there’s really nothing like seeing the tile in the space next to the items that are in there, hence that last minute swap.

We mentioned in that same post that we limited ourselves to larger tiles with interesting patterns, rather than smaller mosaics because we knew it would help the process go faster (we LOVE our pink house master bathroom floor, but it took us forever and a day). But even within that larger-tile parameter, we learned that some tiles were faster, easier, and more foolproof to lay than others. We LOVE how all of them turned out in the end, but there are some that gave us more difficulty (and took much longer to install) than others. So if speed and ease are an important factor when it comes to picking tile, or if you’re a newbie tiler and want to choose something that’s simple & straightforward, this post should help.

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

The blue patterned tiles that we laid in the bathrooms on the left side were the fastest and the most straightforward to install. Why? Because (1) they were square and (2) the pattern was symmetrical on all sides, meaning you could put the tile down in any orientation and it would line up. The combination of those two factors made it much easier to lay out, cut, and install because we were always working with right angles (we’ll talk about hex tile in a moment!). And because the pattern was the same on every edge, we had less waste because we could use both sides of a cut tile again in another smaller spot (like around any edge).

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

The size of these tiles was also really easy to work with. The master bath tile (above) was around an 8 x 8″ square while the hall bath tile (below) was 9 x 9″, so they weren’t heavy or unruly like larger tiles can be, but they filled the space more quickly than a smaller mosaic would have. I think each room took us about two hours to lay, which felt like nothing compared to some of the others.

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

And even though they were just simple square tiles that went down easily, the final floor still looks interesting and intricate – which was the goal. So we’re thrilled with these. Ten stars. Would recommend. Final verdict: If you’re looking to achieve something similar and keep your project as simple as possible, I would choose square tiles like these and these. They’re both porcelain too, so they don’t need to be sealed and cared for like more finicky materials do (we’re looking at you cement tile).

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

The only thing we’d do differently next time is we’d use a darker gray grout in the room above. We were trying to streamline everything and keep cost down by not buying different grout colors for each room (and whatever color went on the floors also went in the shower – some of which weren’t grouted at the time of these photos). But Sherry thinks a darker gray would’ve made the grout lines recede a bit more, helping the diamond pattern show through stronger. Anything for a diamond, right?

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

Now, this tile isn’t actually marble (it’s porcelain, just like everything else – because they’re extra durable and never need to be sealed) but it may be our favorite in the entire house. The marble-like finish is classic and bright, but the geometric pattern that’s layered on top makes it unique and unusual. We’ve actually talked about maybe using the same tile in our own bathroom here in Richmond – thats how much we like it.

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

Like the square tiles, this hex was about 8 x 8″ so the size was very manageable to work with and it provided fast coverage in the room. I think this one maybe took us 3-4 hours instead of 2. And that’s mainly because (1) the hex shape took more care to cut and lay and (2) the asymmetrical pattern took more concentration to not screw up. Speaking of which, there are two different looks you can get with this tile. See how the triangles are all the same color in the left picture below and they’re shaded differently in the right picture because we rotated the hexes? We laid out both options and picked the one on the right – but you could lay it the other way if your eyes like that better.

In addition to having to concentrate on not screwing up the pattern, hex tiles are a bit more finicky when it comes to spacing and not letting your layout drift. One tile laid too close to another in your first corner can cause big headaches down the line as that little inconsistency gets magnified in each subsequent row. So we actually laid out lots of tile BEFORE mixing Thinset to check how everything lined up and to ensure that we didn’t end up with slivers of tile anywhere. This may seem like overkill, but it made things go much faster once we actually started setting things for good.

Sidenote: we love this Mapei grout because it comes premixed AND doesn’t need to be sealed and is durable/flexible/stain resistant. So once it’s dried and any grout haze is buffed off, it’s totally good to go. Our contractor swears by it and won’t use anything else, so we tried it throughout the pink house and after over a year of heavy use, all the grout in the bathrooms & the mudroom still looks mint (no grout scrubbing in over a year, folks!)

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

This other hex tile went in hall bathroom on the same side as the one above and, well, it’s a good thing we love how this tile turned out because it felt straight up cursed when we were installing it.

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

First, it presented some of the same challenges as the last hex tile – a non-square shape and an asymmetrical pattern. But this pattern was even trickier to keep straight, which caused a few bad cuts along the way (plus, it was much harder to reuse cut pieces because the pattern was so particular). I actually laid one tile in the WRONG direction and we didn’t notice it until a week later when it was time to grout. Can you spot it below?

It wasn’t a big deal to fix. I just broke it up with a hammer, removed the shattered pieces of that single tile, and installed a new piece in its place – but it did set my grouting back a day because we had to wait for that new thinset to cure before grouting. And of course, this happened AFTER we had run out of tile during the actual installation. Yep, we were like 80% done and had to order another box. So this room had two pretty frustrating setbacks. But eventually we got it done.

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

We actually think the square footage calculations on the website are wrong because a couple of our readers reported being short on these same tiles as well. And even without any bad cuts, we don’t think we would have had enough (again: it’s really really hard to reuse your scraps with a pattern like this). So if you use these tiles, I’d recommend getting around 25% extra (not just your typical 10-15% recommended overage).

Final Verdict: If ease and speed are important factors for you when you’re choosing a tile, I would NOT recommend this one. The result was great, but keeping the pattern straight kinda made our brains hurt, this specific tile ran short for us based on the square footage listed on the site (and we heard it did for a few other people), and now we know that we can get interesting patterns with simpler square tiles.

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

Let’s move downstairs to the two mudrooms / laundry rooms. I don’t have “after” photos of these because we haven’t grouted them quite yet (since the back doors act as the main entrances for the crew, the mudrooms are still seeing a lot of foot traffic and grime). So right now they’re both covered in protective paper and we’ll grout once things calm down over there. That means my best photos are mostly progress photos.

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

We really liked installing this chevron tile because the rectangular shape made it easy to lay out and cut, plus the size (17″ x 35″) meant the room – which is nearly the size of all four bathrooms combined – filled up very quickly. The only downside to the size was that they were a bit heavy and cumbersome to maneuver, and I had to get creative with how I rested them on the guide of my wet saw to get them to fit under the blade while I cut them. Plus, keeping big tiles level can be challenging so we always recommend using these LASH spacers, which you can read more about in this post.

My only beef with this tile is that ideally, your spacing between tiles would match the spacing of the zigzags within the tile itself. However, to do that, the manufacturer recommends a (wait for it) … 2/17th spacer. WHO THE HECK SELLS A TWO-SEVENTEENTHS SPACER?! Fortunately, a standard 1/8th or 1/16th (which is what we did) is pretty close to 2/17ths. But still, I feel like it’s an unnecessary complication that could make your chevron not line up perfectly. But even still, for a big room, I would definitely choose this tile again.

Final Verdict: Larger tiles can be harder to handle, cut, and to get level, but these tiles were worth the trouble and we finished the room quickly since they were so large. It’s also one our favorite tiles looks-wise (this room gets the most in-person compliments) and it’s extremely durable (porcelain again) so we would recommend this for sure, especially with the LASH spacers we used.

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

I’ve saved the best for last. And by the best, I mean hands-down-the-hardest. Yes folks, this is the one we probably would NOT do again… which is hard to say because it’s so darn cool to look at (even here, when it’s still ungrouted). Reminder: the space between the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it’ll all look seamless in the end.

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

To create this floor we laid three different colors of long porcelain tiles (pink, white, and taupe) in a herringbone pattern, making it a perfect storm of all the challenges of the previous rooms combined:

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

Because of all of those factors – and because it was such a large room – this is the only space that took us an entire day to complete. Heck, it took us more than two hours just to get our pattern planned and the initial pieces cut. Maybe we were just tired (this was room five of six that we did across two consecutive weekends) but it took nearly all of our mental energy to precisely measure all of these angled cuts, to keep things square to the walls, and to not screw up the color sequence in the process.

Final Verdict: This was by far the hardest tile choice and it took the longest and required the most mental calculations (angled cuts, creating the pattern ourselves with three different colored tiles, etc). I think it could’ve been simpler had it been a smaller room (or frankly, just a wider room with more full pieces) or if we hadn’t done the herringbone pattern, so I don’t want to totally dissuade anyone from recreating this. Because again, we’re REALLY happy with the result. But I do want you guys to know what you’re getting yourselves into.

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

This post didn’t cover a lot of “how to” because tiling is something we’ve talked a lot about over the years (I’ll link to some of our previous tutorials at the bottom of this post). But I did want to cover one thing that lots of people asked about on Instagram: cutting around the toilet flange in the floor. See that nice round cut below? Who knew so many people would notice and ask us how it’s done. So here ya go.

I didn’t document this process and we were already done by the time the requests for tips arose, so I’ve tried to illustrate below what I do to make the round cuts around the flange. Most people use an angle grinder to get a really pretty circle cut, but I don’t own one, so my process involves my wet saw and it’s decidedly less pretty, but here it goes…

Basically once I’ve marked the area that needs to be cut, I make a two long cuts from each side at the shallowest angles I can manage (marked in red and purple in the top right picture). This removes a few big chunks and makes the next cuts easier.

Then I make a bunch of short cuts very close together – almost like making teeth – along the edge of the circle (marked in purple and red in the bottom left picture above). The “teeth” usually break off in the process, or if they’re too thick I just run my blade against them again. The final result is rarely a perfect circle and often has little indentations where I made the teeth cuts. But it’ll all be covered by a toilet anyways, so it doesn’t need to be perfect.

In fact, I probably don’t need to be as meticulous as I am since it’ll be hidden under the toilet. But you don’t want to get too lazy because your toilet needs a flat solid surface to rest on and if your chosen porcelain throne has an especially small base, a larger cut could end up peeking out.

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or want to check out some of our previous tile projects, here you go:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again published first on https://bakerskitchenslimited.tumblr.com/

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truereviewpage · 6 years ago

Text

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or want to check out some of our previous tile projects, here you go:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again published first on https://aireloomreview.tumblr.com/

0 notes

statusreview · 6 years ago

Text

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or want to check out some of our previous tile projects, here you go:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again published first on https://ssmattress.tumblr.com/

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interiorstarweb · 6 years ago

Text

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or want to check out some of our previous tile projects, here you go:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again published first on https://novaformmattressreview.tumblr.com/

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additionallysad · 6 years ago

Photo

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again https://ift.tt/2TSQyzF

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

For each of the four shower/tub surrounds we chose white subway tile for the walls (simple, classic, affordable, and it’s a tile that lets the more interesting floor tile in each room be the star). So this post is mostly going to focus on the floors in each space since we’ve covered our adventures in subway tile here and here already.

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

We showed you all of the floor tile selections in this post about how we chose our tile, cabinets, and paint colors. But we did make one last minute change to the plan from that post: we swapped the two master bathroom tile choices (seen in the two photos above) because the marble-esque tile ended up looking better with the blue-green doors than the pink ones. As much planning as you do beforehand, there’s really nothing like seeing the tile in the space next to the items that are in there, hence that last minute swap.

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

Now, this tile isn’t actually marble (it’s porcelain, just like everything else – because they’re extra durable and never need to be sealed) but it may be our favorite in the entire house. The marble finish is classic and bright, but the pattern on top makes it unique and unusual. We’ve actually talked about maybe using the same tile in our own bathroom here in Richmond – thats how much we like it.

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

Final Verdict: Ultimately this tile was noticeably (but not dramatically) harder than the square tiles, and with enough spacers (we used 1/16th spacers) we were able to keep everything lined up and spaced similarly. Even if our spacing had drifted a little, the grout color we used disguised the spacing pretty well anyways. Sidenote: we love this Mapei grout because it comes premixed AND doesn’t need to be sealed and is durable/flexible/stain resistant. So once it’s dried and any grout haze is buffed off, it’s totally good to go. Our contractor swears by it and won’t use anything else, so we tried it throughout the pink house and after over a year of heavy use, all the grout in the bathrooms/mudroom still look mint (no grout scrubbing in over a year, folks!)

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

I didn’t document this process and we were already done by the time the process arose, so I’ve tried to illustrate below what I do to make the round cuts around the flange. Most people use an angle grinder to get a really pretty circle cut, but I don’t own one, so my process involves my wet saw and it’s decidedly less pretty, but here it goes…

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or to check out some of our previous tile projects, check out some of the links below:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

#additionally sad home renovations

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vincentbnaughton · 6 years ago

Text

The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | wall tile | shower floor | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

We showed you all of the floor tile selections in this post about how we chose our tile, cabinets, and paint colors. But we did make one last minute change to the plan from that post: we swapped the two master bathroom tile choices (seen in the two photos above) because the marble-esque tile ended up looking better with the blue-green doors than the pink ones. As much planning as you do beforehand, there’s really nothing like seeing the tile in the space next to the items that are in there, hence that last minute swap.

So let’s start with the easiest ones:

The Square Patterned Tiles

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW White Truffle | wall: SW Spare White

floor tile |grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW White Truffle | drop-in tub

Let’s move on to the next simplest tile to install…

The Marble Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay

Now, this tile isn’t actually marble (it’s porcelain, just like everything else – because they’re extra durable and never need to be sealed) but it may be our favorite in the entire house. The marble finish is classic and bright, but the pattern on top makes it unique and unusual. We’ve actually talked about maybe using the same tile in our own bathroom here in Richmond – thats how much we like it.

(Note: the space between the tile & the tub or the tile & the baseboard in various shots throughout this post will get white quarter round molding, so it all looks seamless in the end)

floor tile | wall tile | grout: frost | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White

But just because this hex tile went down smoothly, doesn’t mean it all will…

The Patterned Hex Tile

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay

floor tile | grout: warm gray | door: SW Oyster Bay | wall: SW Spare White | drop-in tub

The Chevron Mudroom Tile

floor tile | spacers |wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The Herringbone Mudroom Tile

floor tiles: pink, white, and taupe | wall: SW Spare White | trim: SW Extra White

The tri-color pattern took lots of concentration to keep straight

Despite being long rectangular tiles, laying a herringbone meant LOTS of angled cuts, which are less forgiving

It was difficult to reuse cut pieces because of the alternating colors and angled cuts

A herringbone pattern needs meticulous spacing to keep your pattern from drifting

And One More Thing… About Toilet Holes

Speaking of which, the upstairs toilets and vanities got installed last week so we’re hoping to make a trip out there this weekend to check it all out! Things are really coming together!!

More Tiling Projects & How To’s:

If you’re interested in more tutorials on tiling or to check out some of our previous tile projects, check out some of the links below:

How to install a subway tile backsplash (with video!)

How to mix thinset and how to install penny tile

How to install subway tile in a herringbone pattern

How to install cement board and large floor tiles

How to install a herringbone marble backsplash using mastic

How to install oversized tile in an outdoor area

How we customized a hex mosaic in the beach house

*This post contains affiliate links*

The post The Duplex Is Tiled! Here’s What We Loved & What We Wouldn’t Do Again appeared first on Young House Love.

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prouxvaire · 7 years ago

Text

Upstairs Bath: Finish Work and All The Swears

Progress on the upstairs bathroom is– and this is a phrase I haven’t used in conjunction with progress around the house in a long time– coming along nicely

I mean, to be honest, there is nothing nice about it… this bathroom is coming along like a gigantic pain in my ass, but it is coming along, and that’s the important part.

There have been some easy wins over the last week. I mean, I spent last Friday night inside the tub with a beer and caulk gun…

By the end of the night the tub was water-tight and I started giving some serious thought to having a working shower in this bathroom, which meant dealing with the unfinished plumbing.

Three years ago when I bought the tub (and, again, assumed this was going to be a 3 weekend project) I also bought the Delta Addison tub and shower trim kit. It came with a tub spout connector that needs to be soldered to the copper stub-out the plumbers left…

I’m mediocre at sweating pipes. Like, I can do it, but I don’t want to do it within an inch of the new surround tile with zero margin for error. Right? I’m crazy, but not I-want-to-accidentally-burn-my-house-down crazy.

Here’s how I know the idea of finishing this plumbing was stressing me out…

I woke up Saturday morning with plumbing parts in my bed.

Apparently I had a burning plumbing question at 3AM that had to be answered right then.

Also, Saturday morning I got an Amazon notification that a new coupling with a set-screw (that doesn’t need to be soldered on) had been shipped. Apparently 3AM me is very resourceful and good at problem solving.

The new coupling cost $7. So, two years ago when I had a working tub upstairs and thought I needed to bring the plumber back to install this coupling… turns out I just needed a small bout of insomnia, a $7 part, and to stop being such a wuss and start thinking about other ways to solve a problem.

Story of my life, guys.

Here’s how the install went…

I did a dry-fit first, and then cut the stub out down to size using a copper tube cutter (they’re fairly cheap, easy to use, and you can find them at most hardware stores.)

Then, put the coupling on, and tightened down the set screw…

And then screwed the tub spout on…

Yep. Took all of 3 minutes.

After the drywall patches were finished above the shower I also installed the shower head (which was just screwed in with a little Teflon tape.) And then, for the first time in 3 years, had a working shower upstairs….

And not just a working shower, but, an amazing shower. This house has mediocre water pressure, and I thought that until I fixed that (sometime in the next 20 years) it was just going to be mediocre showers from here on out, but turns out all I needed was a really good shower head.

This one is like an effing massage. (And that’s not sponsored in any way, just the gods honest truth.)

Which is all to say, my mom was right. Having this bathroom mostly functional has drastically improved my quality of life.

But, as with all good things, it did not come without a fight. And in my case that fight was with every single one of the five– yes five– separate light fixtures in this bathroom.

There’s the one that used to be in the closet I tore out, and worked briefly 3 years ago before all of the sudden dying… (Currently I’m getting no power to the switch, and have no idea why.)

Then there’s the two can lights I tried to retrofit a few years ago, but the trim doesn’t fit quite right (because why would it?)

Oh, and this thing above the shower.

I can’t even.

But the worst of all of them is this fan over the toilet.

The light hasn’t worked for the entirety of the time I’ve lived here, and just about nothing could compel me to take the cover off that light because I’ve been traumatized by getting a facefull of desiccated japanese beetles one too many times while trying to change light fixtures in this house.

Note: They taste worse than they smell.

Ugh.

But there was no way I was going to have a fully remodeled bathroom and still have that ugly fan over the toilet, so I got to it… and, first of all? There was a (luckily abandoned) wasp nest in there…

Wasps nest notwithstanding, removing the old box from the ceiling was a maddening affair. I have access to the attic so I thought this would be no big deal, but that particular part of the attic had decking installed with nails. So instead of being able to un-screw the OSB to access the fan box I had to haul two saws up to the attic to cut a hole in it.

Then I realized that because of the large space between the floors of my house and the fact the that fan was in a soffit, the box was a solid 18″ below the floor of the attic (i.e. only accessible if I laid on the floor and reached down as far as I could while my face was smashed up against a pile of what was most likely mouse poop. I don’t want to talk about it.)

After maybe 30 minutes of trying to locate the screws and/or pry the box loose I realize it had actually been NAILED into the soffit framing. Nailed. Why.

It’s been a long time since I’ve truly lost my shit in the middle of a project, so I will just say this: I only managed to remove that fan box with the liberal use of my hammer and every single swear word I know.

And, of course, in the process, tore a nice big chunk of drywall out of the ceiling that I’d just finished patching and sanding BECAUSE THIS PROJECT WILL NEVER END.

All the swear words, you guys. All of them.

But finally, finally, I got the new box up, installed the fan and the light, Flipped the switch, aaaaaand…

The light didn’t come on.

You know how this goes… take it all apart, put it all back together again, remain convinced that there will never ever be a working light fixture in this bathroom, and then, after several hours and all the new and creative ways I could combine four-letter words, I finally got the fan AND the light to turn on.

Whew.

At this point I thought it would be smooth sailing… just replace the old fixture above the shower with a new LED retrofit can light. These things are super easy to install. You just screw an adapter into the light socket, push the light up into the can, and voila! New can light. It’s as easy as changing a light bulb.

Except in my house, of course. Because the “can” wasn’t a standard 4″ can OR a standard 5″ can. It’s 4.5″. Because why not?

After some finagling I figured out how to use a 5″ retrofit LED can light (which, yes, I happened to have on hand because I hoard house-parts, apparently) but it was a pretty tight fit, and I may have been less than gentle trying to get the trim to fit into the can, and the next thing I know…

Yeah, cut a wire, popped a breaker, and for the life of me could not get the power to turn back on to this room.

If you need me, I’ll just be sitting up here in the dark for the next eternity.

Ugh. Fine. I did not sit in the dark for all eternity. I eventually stopped whining, reset all the GFI outlets and the breaker, and eventually ended up here:

It’s like the skies parted, the heavens opened up, and angels started singing. Also, 4 of the 5 lights turned on.

So for about a week I had one of the most well-lit bathrooms in the history of modern electricity… and then we got hit with an early-March snowstorm.

Which knocked out the power to the house for the last 3 days.

I mean, I’m sure the universe isn’t actually out to get me, but you know it’s also definitely getting a few laughs at my expense right now.

Here’s the good news though (other than the fact that I own a generator, which is very, very good news after 72 hours without power) the progress may be a pain in the ass, but it is coming along:

Tear out closet and patch drywall

Re-face cabinets

Level, tile, and grout floor

Tile tub surround

Patch ceiling

Move outlets and patch all drywall

Replace plumbing and install toilet

Caulk tub and toilet

Paint radiator

Paint ceiling and touch-up walls

Install baseboard

Install new light fixtures and switches

Add cabinet “feet”

Finish tub plumbing for working shower

Get and hang mirrors

Get hutch for storage

Install shelving, towel racks, etc.

Paint and re-hang door with new hardware

Another couple of weekends and it might actually be finished.

from http://ift.tt/2FWfMqn

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sureyhny · 7 years ago