#all these two asian women did was go on a hike | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

universaltantra · 4 years ago

Text

Nice Jewish Girl Runs Away From Home, Becomes Tantric Lama

Alexandra David-Neél was a Franco-Belgian singer, explorer, author and Tibetan Mystic who became a Tantric Lama. She was the first westerner to visit the forbidden city of Lhasa in the year 1916. Long before Heinrich Harrar spent his 7 years in Tibet making nice with the Dalai Lama, Alexandra had been there, done that, and why her life has never been immortalized on film remains a mystery that only the Hollywood patriarchy can answer. She wrote over 30 books covering the subjects of Buddhism, Tibetan Tantra and Esotericism and that’s just for starters.She was also a much accomplished and sought after translator, being fluent in French, English, Sanskrit and Tibetan. Sadly, only two of her books are still in print today: “My Journey To Lhasa” and “Magic and Mystery in Tibet”. Alexandra lived to the age of 101 and to this day remains the most authoritative source for Tibetan Tantric Buddhism.

Alexandra was born in Paris, October 24, 1868 to an anarchist father who nearly escaped execution by firing squad after the failed revolt of the Paris Commune and a mother who was a deeply religious, conservative heiress. This social incompatibility led to many arguments between the parents during Alexandra’s formative years. No doubt this created a pattern in her life of wanting to runaway from conflict and instilled a desire to find balance through travel. Her earliest attempt to runaway was at the 5, she only got as far as the local park before the Gendarmes found her and promptly returned her home. This was the first of many attempts to runaway until she reached adulthood and was able to claim her inheritance; allowing her to satisfy her wanderlust. I myself being a product of a dysfunctional upbringing, related to many of her situations, which made her story to be particularly compelling on a very personal level.

Throughout her childhood and adolescence, she would find the opportunities to escape her bourgeois surroundings in search of adventure: While vacationing with her parents Belgium, she ran away to the Netherlands, was found and returned home. Later that same year, she embarked on a bicycle trip from Paris to Spain, “forgetting” to tell her parents, naturally. But perhaps her most ambitious and successful attempt to fly the coup was at age 17, when she boarded a train from Brussels to Switzerland, hiked across the Alps where she wound up in Lake Maggiore, on the Italian side of the Alps. This last escapade was certainly a primer for her future adventures in the Himalayas. As she loved to say about herself: “I learned to run before I could walk”.

When she turned 21, she moved out on her own and set herself up in Paris, where she enrolled in the Paris Conservatory of Music while at the same time began to study esoteric traditions with the well known mystic of her times, Madame Blavatsky. She also discovered Paris’ venerable museum to Asian art and culture: Le Musée Guimet; which still exists today. It was here that she fed her hunger for exotic cultures, traditions and converted to Buddhism. Right around this time Alexandra received her inheritance and she flew the coup once again, this time to India. She traveled through India, studying Sanskrit, visiting temples until she ran out of money and returned to Paris.

Upon her return to Paris, she sadly discovered that her desire to share the experiences of her visit was met with antipathy. Since women did not do those things and studies of other cultures were done from an observers point of view. Not as Alexandra had done, as a participant. Needing to find gainful employment, she fell back on her earlier training in voice to pursue a career as an opera singer. As a singer she achieved a fairly acceptable amount of success, traveling the world and finally landing a permanent residency at the Saigon Opera. She even found the time to compose an Opera herself! She continued traveling the world and while performing a gig in Tunisia, she met the man who was to become her husband and would be the facilitator of some of her greatest adventures. Philippe Neel was a civil engineer who worked for the government of France and like Alexandra was extensively well traveled as a result of his job. Together they had an unconventional marriage by the norms of the times. It could be called an “open marriage” but open only in the sense it was Philippe’s support of her travels that facilitated some of Alexandra’s greatest adventures. But let’s not confuse Philippe for a pushover, because underneath all the generosity was an ulterior motive: Philippe also had a mistress and dispatching his wife off to yet another globe trotting mission kept her out of the way. All evidence suggests that Alexandra was ok with this and chose to look the other way.

The Ultimate Late Bloomer:

On August 9, 1911, with her husband’s blessing, Alexandra returned to India. She told her husband she would return in a few months. She would be gone for 14 years. But during all this time Philippe was supportive both emotionally and financially. The letter between them prove this. Even though there was little physical connection between them, their correspondence reveals a strong intellectual connection and more importantly, a heart connection.

Upon arriving in India she travelled north to the Himalayan Kingdom of Sikkim where she was a guest of Maharaja. Here she met the Dalai Lama, whose only advice for her was “Learn Tibetan!” and a great Buddhist mystic named Lachen Gomshen Rinpoche (more about him later). In one of the monasteries she met a teenager named Lama Yuphur Yongden who would become her lifelong companion and whom she would eventually adopt as her son. The proximity of Sikkim to the Tibetan border sparked Alexandra’s desire to visit the forbidden city of Lhasa, which was closed to Westerners. But with no success; she did cross the border illegally a few times but was turned away.

During her mentorship with Gomshen, she lived in an anchorite cave. Essentially as a hermit, practicing yoga, Tibetan Tantra and the study of Buddhist Scriptures. So accomplished did she become in her studies that she was awarded the title of “Lamani” (female Lama) and “Kadoma” a reincarnated female spirit. As a result of this she was allowed to wear the sacred red and white vestments of a Lama as depicted in the pictures here.

On July 18, 1916, she once again attempted to illegally enter Tibet, hoping to make it to Lhasa. She did manage to visit a few important monasteries and struck up a friendship with the Panchan Lama and his mother. She was given an honorary Doctorate in Tibetan Buddhism by the Panchan Lama, who wanted her to stay on as his guest. But Alexandra refused, wanting to return to Sikkim. This was to prove to be a great error on her part. Once she returned to Sikkim, she learned that her actions had sparked the ire of the British Colonial Authorities. Remember ant this point in time, Sikkim, India and the rest of the kingdoms of the subcontinent were under British colonial rule and travel to Tibet was forbidden. So consequently poor Alexandra was kicked out of the country.

This began Alexandra’s Iliad through the countries of Asia. Since WW1 was raging throughout Europe, it was too dangerous to go back. Instead she headed east, visiting China, Japan, Korea, and Mongolia with the faithful Yongden at her side. Determined to return to Lhasa, she and Yongden devised a plan where they would attempt to enter Tibet by traveling from Mongolia, via the northern deserts through the shared border of China and Tibet. In order to make her entrance with as little fanfare as possible (it’s obvious by now that Alexandra had a flare for the obvious) she darkened her skin with soot, dressed in rags and passed herself off as Yongden’s mother. A foreshadowing of things to come. This time her journey was a success, by now it was 1924 Alexandra had now been wandering the face of the earth for almost 14 years. Even though she had achieved a personal Nirvana, Alexandra felt the need to return home. So she packed up and returned to France with her companion Yongden in tow and returned to France

Inner Iliad/Outer Odyssey:

Upon her arrival in France, Alexandra discovered that she had attained something of a celebrity status in France, due to her writings, translations of Buddhists manuscripts and reports of her adventures in popular magazines. She wound up settling down in the village of Digne-les-Bains in the region of Provence. She earned a reputation as a Buddhist scholar of record. The accounts of her adventures were published in many of the major newspapers and magazines of the day. It was here that she wrote her book “Magic and Mystery of Tibet”. She worked on expanding the property and by all accounts created the first Tibetan Tantric temple in the western hemisphere.

During this period of her life from 1925 to 1937 that she began what I like to call her “Inner Odyssey”. Alexandra had clocked in more travel miles than most of her contemporaries an amazing feat for anyone back then, in particular a woman. The origins of her wanderlust began as a way of escaping from her dysfunctional past. As she progressed on her outer journey to forbidden lands, she also began a journey of inner exploration in a quest to find balance. Through the study of ancient and sacred texts, she was able to shed her outer shell to realize to achieve a personal nirvana and become a “Lamani”.

In her book, “Magic and Mystery in Tibet” she recounts many unexplainable phenomena which may appear to be inconceivable to the average Westerner. Some of which are explained here:

Tummo: The ability to control the temperature of your body. This technique came in handy for Alexandra and her companions as they hiked through the Himalayas. Since they often traveled by foot or by horse and on a shoe string budget, learning to control your body’s temperature for personal warmth or to start a campfire would become a mainstay survival technique throughout her travels.

Tulpa: This is not to be confused with the western concept of an Egregore or a Golem. A Tulpa is the creation of a physical being through one’s own thought process. In order to survive under dangerous conditions while trekking through the Himalayas, Alexandra recalls creating Tulpas to serve as her guides and to endeavor protection. Apparently none of these emanations survived for more than a few days according to her.

Bardo Thödel: A death and rebirth ritual in which the Lamas have the ability to die, and in doing so their spirits would leave their physical body and then return at will. This was accomplished by the insertion of a thin bamboo reed or straw into the fontanelle of the skull. This straw or reed would serve as a conduit for Spirit to exit and enter the body, once the magical words had been uttered. These magical words (which I will not disclose here) were also uttered when a Lama would be midwifing a transition of a human from this existence to the next Bardo. In other words, serving as a guide for them at the time of death.

Flying Yogis/Levitating Yogis: In her book “Magic and Mystery in Tibet”, she describes seeing yogis with the ability to levitate or even fly through the air to get from point A to point B. There has been much speculation about this phenomena in particular especially since many Indian Fakirs have been discredited when it was discovered that they were creating the illusion of levitation by relying on a specially rigged chair disguised with cloaks. But what Alexandra describes in her book is nothing of the sort; She witnessed grown men flying across open fields with out any visible means of support.

To the average westerner, these anecdotes may border on the delusional or ridiculous. And yes they sometimes they are a bit difficult to believe. But keep in mind of the environment and culture that produced these assertions: They were produced in the rarified air of Himalayan Kingdoms that are free of are western distractions such as internet, cell phones, televisions, traffic, unhealthy foods. These “modern conveniences” that are more of an addiction than a convenience. There the mind is free of distractions and free to manifest at will. To paraphrase Alexandra: Our thoughts manifest our reality, and the mind that is free of distractions can manifest anything. So there is no doubt in my mind that she used these techniques not only to expand her knowledge of to also heal from her fractured past, make herself whole and to impart healing to others.

Her Relevance Today’s World:

So again, to the Western mind these recollections would seem improbable, but I am here too say that one needs to take themselves out our linear Occidental mindset and learn how to appreciate how these techniques can be applied to our own urban enlightenment. The Tantric Yogis may have had the capacity to fly through the air but they would probably shrink in horror at the thought of us climbing into a big metal bird that flies through the sky. We may laugh at yogis inserting straws into their skulls in order to experience life and rebirth, but how about her modern medical traditions that keep people alive through organ transplants or defibrillation when in some cases the patient may be way past their time to transition?

Our society today is fractured, some say way beyond repair. But I refuse to subscribe to that opinion. Because if these teaching that have existed for thousands of years before our current western traditions, then they will still continue to flourish long after our ministries have been reduced to dust. Today there are advanced thinkers who would have mediation taught in schools not as any part of a religious agenda but as a way of calming a child’s hyperactive mind. As a former art instructor, I can confirm that teaching some simple breath works prior to art class can open a student’s mind so that they can experience a great creative awakening.So imagine, if we can plant a small seed of awareness, what amazing children we will create. Alexandra would have been proud. In fact there are many Tantric techniques that couples can practice in order to bring an enlightened child into this world. But this will be the topic of another blog later on.

Le Troisième Etape:

In 1937 Alexandra was now 69 years old, most people would be entering the third stage of their life, but not Alexandra; She had spent a good 12 years in Digne-les-Bagnes, making improvements on her home, expanding a portion of the structure to which she named the “Samtem Dzong” or “Fortress of Meditation”. The purpose of this structure was for the teaching of mediation making it the first Lamaist Temple in the west and it would later become part of her museum.

At this point in her life she was ready to return to her beloved Tibet and to travel through China in order to study Taoism which is the Chinese form of Tantra. This time she decided to take the Trans Siberian Express so she could enter Tibet through the Northern route. But as the fates would have it, for the second time in her life, she was caught once again in the midst of a worldwide conflict: The war between China and Japan. This event was to be a precursor to World War II and it’s ironic to think that Alexandra who many considered to be a warrior for peace, was now compelled to witness the horrible atrocities that were committed by both sides. But always wanting to make herself useful, she actually worked as a medic and a healer for both sides of the conflict.

Finally in 1938, after a year of navigating the conflicts of WW2, she was able to at last enter Tibet, where she visited monasteries, studied sacred scriptures and settled down in the village of Kangdin for what was to become five years retreat of solitary meditation. It was at the end of these five years when she learned that her husband had passed away. It was now 1946, she had been wandering through China and Tibet for 9 years. It was time to return to France in order to tend to the estate of her deceased husband. So she left Tibet via India this time, departing on a new invention called the jet plane which flew her back to Paris.

Now back in France, Alexandra settled her husband’s affairs. She stayed in at Digne-le-Bains where the accolades began to pour in as a result her accomplishments. The French government named her a Chevalier of the French Legion of Honor. She was awarded the Gold Medal by Geographical Society of France. There were streets and schools named after her. Alexandra David-Neel became the foremost authority on Tibetan Tantric Buddhism.

But fate was to give Alexandra one final cruel blow, in 1955 Yongden, her beloved travel companion and now adopted son, died suddenly of kidney failure. The years of hardship traveling under impossible conditions took its toll on his fragile body. Alexandra was heartbroken, but after cremating his remains, vowed that they would once again return to Tibet. She was now 87 years old. Even though her body was showing signs of wear and tear, there were many who said she looked younger due to her lifestyle of yoga and meditation. She continued writing, translating, teaching and became known as the “Wise Lady of Digne”. Buddhist scholars from all over the world made the pilgrimage to her house in Provence to sit at her feet and drink from her well of wisdom.

Finally, at the age of 100, she felt the need to return to Tibet and so went about filing the papers to obtain her travel visa. On September 8, 1969, she transitioned to the next Bardo a month shy of her 101st birthday and just as her travel visa was approved by the Chinese government. Her body was cremated and her ashes, along with those of Yongden, were taken by her followers to Varanasi India so they could be thrown into the Ganges River.

I would like to think that her ashes traveled the Shakti trajectory of the Ganges to the Himalayas, where her Spirit roams the sacred mountain passes as the Lamani, Kadoma, Flying Sky Dakini, always everywhere and nowhere.

Did you enjoy this Blog? For more information, please visit my website: universaltantra.org or you can contact me by email: [email protected] or by phone: +1 (832) 743-8148

#tantra #alexandra david-néel #tibetantantra #tantrahouston #tantrateachers

5 notes · View notes

d2kvirus · 4 years ago

Text

Dickheads of the Month: March 2021

As it seems that there are people who say or do things that are remarkably dickheaded yet somehow people try to make excuses for them or pretend it never happened, here is a collection of some of the dickheaded actions we saw in the month of March 2021 to make sure that they are never forgotten.

It was brainless enough when the Metropolitan Police suggested that Sarah Everard’s death could be blamed on her for walking home alone at night - but when it turned out that it was a police officer who murdered her, who had also been previously let off at least one case of publicly exposing himself entirely because he was a police officer, brainless left the table and instead we found ourselves noticing they were trying to blame the victim while had covered up for the eventual perpetrator

...while we also had the angry men of Twitter respond to Janie Jones’ clearly not serious suggestion that if a 6pm curfew for women were to be introduced then she would call for a 6pm curfew for men with all manner of bile, shouting, finger-pointing, and comments which the police might just so happen to want to look into

...while smirking bully Priti Patel also managed to get her oar in, as various Reclaim The Streets Vigils were shut down by the police (which is a good look, all things considered...) using the legislation that Patel rushed through a few days earlier to combat BLM protests several months after the BLM protests happened

...but then the Metropolitan Police managed to pivot the focus back onto themselves with their heavy-handed tackling of a vigil on Clapham Common that ended up with them handcuffing various women who were there - which they weren’t so keen to do when Kate Middleton was there - before releasing a statement that boiled down to “Look what you made us do” and then rushing to protect a statue of Winston Churchill for no reason whatsoever but making sure to have lots of photos of them protecting their precious statue anyway

...but then the Tory government demanded they get the last word by bulldozing through their boot stamping on a human face forever policing bill that bans all forms of protests due to it causing “annoyance” as if protesting against the ills of society is the same thing as somebody cutting in front of you in the supermarket queue or not holding open a door

...although the Metropolitan Police did try and regain their title as Biggest Dickheads the following week when an anti-lockdown march featuring professional victim Lawrence Fox and fecal enthusiast Gillian McKeith was met by the police letting them walk in a large, huddled mass without a mask between them and didn't lift a single finger

...and there’s nothing sinister about how the BBC failed to broadcast a single item saying the bill had been bulldozed through, while the piece on their website was buried instead of being on the front page

...and then at the buzzer Her Majesty's Inspectorate of Constabulary and Fire & Rescue Services published a report saying that the police acted appropriately at the vigil, in spite of a wealth of evidence and eyewitness testimony saying they absolutely fucking didn’t

Of course we can trust the Tory government when they publish a report stating that racism isn't a systemic issue in the United Kingdom, even when various people cited as experts for this report were very surprised to hear that they were part of it given they were never asked for their input

So it has been found that proven liar Boris Johnson misled parliament over the Covid contracts being doled out by the Tories, which I’m sure will lead to widespread calls in the media for his resignation - or are we to believe that the real reason for the British media calling for Nicola Sturgeon’s resignation is down to something different?

To sum up the British press completely losing their minds about the Meghan Markle interview, we had various royal correspondents responding to some of the more serious allegations with a combination of vicious smears that don’t debunk a single thing she said or outright misrepresenting what she said to try and tip the narrative in the Royals’ favour, while the Press Gazette issued a statement rejected her claims of bigotry in the British media that can easily be disproved in seconds with photos of various front pages of The Sun, the Daily Mail and the Daily Express on whichever subject you wish to choose - which was supported unintentionally by Ian Murray trying to shout down criticism having been presented with examples of such bigotry live on air - and in response to Murray’s hapless showing, the Society of Editors put out a mealy-mouthed nonpology that pretended that nobody ever said anything about bigotry...before suggesting Murray bugger off

...although Piers Moron Morgan picked up the baton for nastiness by first accusing Meghan of making up that she had suicidal thoughts and immediately after the interview aired it was announced that Meghan’s estranged father was lined up for an interview, although it does have to be said he was far from the only person to respond by throwing that at Meghan like a rock - only to then flounce out of the Good Morning Britain studio when called out for his bullshit, shortly before being told to hand in his resignation or else

So after Keir Starmer tore up the ballot for the Liverpool mayoral election last months, you would expect him to name a new list of candidates that was more to his liking - which is cynical enough - right? Wrong, instead he backed the government's plans to seize control of the city, meaning that Keir Starmer handed over the Labour stronghold of Liverpool to the Tories with no fucking questions asked

Further enhancing public trust in the police was Andy Marsh of Avon and Somerset Police claiming that several of his officers suffered broken bones and one a punctured lung dealing with the protests in Bristol - which turned out to be a complete lie, a lie told by the Chief Constable of Avon and Somerset Police, as not a single officer was treated for any of those injuries

...and a few days later Avon and Somerset Police apparently had to deal with mindless thugs attacking police batons with their faces and seated protesters holding up their hand throwing themselves into their riot shields. Oh wait, that isn't what happened, instead they waded in swinging batons and using blading tactics with their shields

Nice to know that the Tory government are so in control of the Covid pandemic that somebody with the Brazilian variant got through the tough measures of testing people on arrival by simply not filling out the form - and it was three weeks before the Tory government admitted this had happened

...and the main response appeared to be Chris Philp posting a lot of tweets pointing the finger at Croydon council for something completely unrelated the same day it emerged the person with the Brazilian variant was in Croydon, which looked like a blatant attempt to game Twitter’s search algorithm

Smirking bully Priti Patel ended up having to pay off Sir Philip Rutnam to make his claims against her go away after an expensive court case with the taxpayer footing the bill, which I’m sure will lead to widespread calls in the media for his resignation - or are we to believe that the real reason for the British media calling for Nicola Sturgeon’s resignation is down to something different?

Nice guy Rishi Sunak wowed people with his Budget, where he gave NHS staff a 1% pay raise that, in some cases, amounts to £3.50 a week which won’t even cover the fees to park at their place of work, claims that he wouldn’t raise taxes while sneaking in tax hikes, bunging an additional £15bn to Serco for their woeful Test & Trace system, and also pretending that the UK could pursue freeports now that they're out of the EU in spite the UK having seven freeports between 1998-2012 - but we’re supposed to ignore all of that because he paid to have ludicrously self-aggrandising videos of himself made

Smirking bully Priti Patel not only somehow managed to pay £5400 in a single trip to Primark, nearly £7000 in two trips to a restaurant, and £700 on cupcakes, but also claimed the lot on her expenses - however she most certainly did not spend £77,000 on having her eyebrows done, as that business was wound up 2018, meaning she spend £77,000 somewhere - which of course led to widespread calls in the media that she resign

So nice of proven liar Boris Johnson to say how glad he is to hear that Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe is being released from prison in Iran. Yes, that would be the same Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe who was imprisoned in Iranian prison due to proven liar Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, who was then Foreign Secretary, not reading his brief and then blurting out of she was guilty of the charges she was being held under which then led to her being given the prison sentence she has just been released from

In response to the Georgia shooting Fox News really read the mood of the nation when the debate was about anti-Asian hate and incel terrorism by doing their damndest to make sure the message told everyone who the real victim was: the shooter, that poor white boy that he is

It was so nice of proven liar Boris Johnson to arrange a charity gala to...hang on, let me check my notes, raise funds so that Carrie Symonds could redecorate her Downing Street flat

According to Andrew Pierce he doesn't see Meghan Markle as black. Apparently it didn’t occur to Andrew Pierce how that sounds, a.) Really fucking bad, and b.) Like Andrew Pierce has reached the next level of Whitesplaining, which shall henceforth be called Whitekeeping

There’s something definitely sinister about the BBC seeing a clip where Charlie Stayt made a quip about known swindler Robert Jenrick having a huge photo of The Queen and an (upside down) union flag in his office, yet their response was to demand that Naga Munchetty publicly apologise for giggling

As if David Cameron fucking up the country in a failed bid to gain political advantage isn’t enough reason for him to be banned from going within five miles of Westminster, him calling up Rishi Sunak to see if he could get some people in the Treasury make the financial problems that Greensill Capital, who Cameron just so happens to have a stake in, certainly counts as another very good reason

Fish fetishist John Redwood reacted to the US removing trade tariffs on British cheese and British Scottish whisky by proudly crowed from the rooftops that this would not happen if we were still in the EU. Three hours later the US removed trade tariffs on all EU cheese and alcohol exports

In another bout of Keir Starmer uniting the Labour party he decided that Anneliese Dodds would be removed as Shadow Chancellor for failing to effectively communicate the party’s vision as if it was Dodds’ fault for the poor poll results - only to do a quick 180 and back Dodds when the main response to this reason was “What the hell?”

The only surprise about The Core being exposed as a dodgy grift that was being secretly bankrolled by the deep pockets of Tim Rutherford-Browne is that it actually took so long for somebody to expose this - because it sure as hell wasn’t a surprise that Twitter account for The Core, plus the accounts and sock puppets run by Rutherford-Browne, very quickly vanished

Of course The Daily Mail and The Sun would both devote far more time and column inches to Angela Rayner claiming expenses for her air pods and rile their readership into an all too predictable frenzy than they would ever devote to, say, tens of billions of pounds worth of taxpayer’s money being siphoned off into the pockets of various Tory MPs’ mates no matter how unqualified or ill-equipped those people happen to be to fulfill those contracts

Clag peddler Gilson B Pontes demonstrated how ill-equipped they are to deal with fair criticism of their god-awful games (which Sony somehow keeps allowing on their store) by abusing Youtube’s copyright system to try and get Jim Sterling’s account terminated - and failed, thus drawing far more attention to Pontes trying to abuse the system, and Youtube doing fuck all about it even though this issue has persisted for years by this point

Are we going to hear about how Andrew Beattie is the latest victim of “cancel culture” or are we going to hear that Beattie could have started his message about how inclusive Beattie Communications in a better way than literally saying “At Beattie Communications, we don’t hire blacks, gays or Catholics”? Gee, let me guess which one...

...and then Burger King make the exact same error by trying to tweet out a message of inclusivity on International Women’s Day, which was doomed when the first tweet of the chain said just five words: “Women belong in the kitchen”

There’s something perverse about Electronic Arts being hit with a scandal involving FUT cards from the FIFA series not because they’re clearly a form of gambling that the company have gotten away with for many years outside of a few countries who call it what it is, but because it turns out an EA employee has been selling the rarest FUT cards on the black market for several hundred pounds per bundle to many willing players who want to cheat the system. The system of gambling. Which is what FUT cards are

The Tories reached peak flag shagger when James Wild posed a series of questions about the lack of union flags in the BBC Annual Report, as if that means a goddamn thing

Sleazebag and alleged wrestler Joey Ryan thought he could pull a fast one and just so happen to improve his image for when the next round of SLAPP suits goes before the judge by organising an event called Wrestling For Women’s Charity - only for the entire grift to fall apart due to it being held by the company he owns, the charity itself having more than questionable backing, and the fact that Ryan was dumb enough that he tried to sneak his own face onto the poster and thought nobody would notice. Coincidentally, once the poster was out, a lot of people noticed and the event was rapidly shut down. Funny, that...

In the latest attempt by Gab to try and make themselves seem relevant they tweeted out some intense batshittery about preserving our way of life featuring a heavily-armed family (including the dog, which was also packing) around the barbeque. There was one teeny tiny issue with this image: it was stolen art from the indie game The American Dream which actively satirises America’s obsession with guns, and all gab did was remove the watermarks from the picture (which they took without permission) for their rallying cry of “remember us? We used to be where all the edgelords hung out before they went to Parler”

Once again Manchester United fans responded to a loss not by suggesting that the opponents played better but with racially abusing one of their players on social media, with Fred bearing the brunt of it this time in the wake of being knocked out of the FA Cup by Leicester

Forgotten 90s comedian Lee Hurst continued to be the face of angry white men on Twitter who think they’re funny by posting a tweet about Greta Thunberg that managed to be creepy, misogynistic, showing a remarkable failure to understand what condoms are made of, and worked out so well for him that Twitter promptly suspended his account

And finally, irritatingly, we have Donald Trump and his proclamation that he won’t be creating a new political party for the 2024 election as he worries that he’ll split the Republican vote. But Donald, you told us you were so popular, so surely both Republican and Democrat supporters will flock to your new party? Or are you worried at losing two elections in a row?

#dickheads of the month

1 note · View note

mirrerover · 5 years ago

Note

PROMPT PALS ✌🏻Domestic! Taekook edition: Taehyung thought he was helping when he said he’d do the laundry. Thought he’d get things extra clean if he just added a bit more detergent than it said on the pack (why else would that empty coffee mug be next to the machine??). Twenty minutes later he questions his decision-making skills.

Taehyung has discovered there’s small and big ways you can miss someone. Miss Jeongguk. The big way is a constant feeling, ebbing and flowing, sometimes merely background noise and almost forgotten, but always there. Jeongguk’s absence.

The small ways are scattered throughout the day, like individual water drops slowly collecting into waves of missing him. Habits and rituals that are broken. Jeongguk not making their morning coffee on his allocated days (Jeongguk‘s days are Monday and Wednesday, because of his early classes, and the weekends because he’ll go for a run in the park and take a shower before Taehyung has even taken his first piss of the day). Jeongguk not being in their bed at night so Taehyung is back to cuddling a pillow to his chest like he did when he was younger. Jeongguk no longer cooking dinner so there are no dishes for Taehyung to wash.

Jeongguk not immediately replying to his texts because of time zone differences and bad cell reception.

Taehyung redirects his frown from his phone screen to the laundry machine and back to his phone again.

Jeongguk doing all their laundry.

The little digital screen at the top of the washer is blinking back a lot of information at Taehyung concerning temperature, the speed at which it spins, and half a dozen other symbols that show up in different combinations depending on how he turns the big dial in the middle. Bedsheets don’t seem to have their own setting and he’s not sure whether to classify them as cotton or coloured.

Taehyung slips his phone in his back pocket with a sigh and decisively turns the dial to coloured.

People spend most of their time in bed with their eyes closed anyway. Low risk first laundry load.

“Who even cares?” Taehyung grouses as he grabs the porcelain measuring cup and fills it to the brim with Jeongguk’s favourite laundry detergent. Something sweet and flowery. And really, really gay as Taehyung likes to remind Jeongguk. “Right, Tannie?”

Yeontan’s nails click nervously on the wooden floor as he hovers around Taehyung’s feet.

Yeontan has always been an unusually quiet Pomeranian with a borderline obsessive fixation on Taehyung. Those stalker impulses hadn’t improved when Yeontan’s other human dad mysteriously disappeared from his daily routine two weeks ago. Taehyung now takes his shits with a tiny dog lying on his feet.

Scooping Yeontan up in his arms, Taehyung retreats back to the couch in the living room, kicking the door closed on his way out.

He’s streaming One Punch Man and is scheduled to wallow in self-pity tonight while he chows down on take out and wears one of Jeongguk’s sweaters. Like he has done for every night these past two weeks. He doesn’t have time for laundry.

——

Taehyung’s ringtone cuts through his sleep with all the viciousness of a morning alarm, startling him bad enough that he almost kicks Yeontan off the couch in his uncoordinated attempts to reach his phone and make it stop. Somewhere between still asleep and vaguely conscious, Taehyung manages to pick the call up and mutter something resembling a greeting. Maybe a curse.

“Tae?” Jeongguk’s voice clears the fog in Taehyung’s mind a little. “Are you there?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Taehyung grumbles as he awkwardly drags his body up in a sitting position, Yeontan immediately climbing into his lap. “I’m here.”

Jeongguk’s giggles sound tinny coming through the speaker of his phone. But they cause a tightness in Taehyung’s chest that makes his next intake of breath a little staggered.

“You sure?”

Taehyung runs his fingers through Yeontan’s fur and smiles like a loser. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

“Okay,” Jeongguk mumbles around a yawn. Taehyung glances at the clock on the wall. It’s early where Jeongguk is. “I got your texts. All 100 of them.”

“We had a moment,” Taehyung says like that explains things. “But Tan and I made it work. We’re independent women.” Another tinny giggle that wraps around Taehyung’s ribs and makes them clench. “You just woke up?”

“Yeah.” There’s some clatter in the background that indicates Jeongguk is up and moving about. Taehyung imagines the messy bed hair and puffy eyes he’s used to waking up next to. How soft Jeongguk looks in the morning. “We’re in a Bed and Breakfast for one night. ‘S how I’m calling.”

They don’t call often. Not as often as Taehyung likes. There’s only one sim card Jeongguk and his brother purchased to share between them as they’re abroad and it’s more of an emergency thing than anything else. Jeongguk calls when he finds wifi. Taehyung always has his sound on.

“Must be nice. Sleeping in a real bed.”

Jeongguk hums softly, a sleepy quality to the vibrations. So similar to when he’s about to fall asleep and Taehyung presses his lips to the nape of his neck to say goodnight.

“How’s Tannie?”

Taehyung glances down at Yeontan staring intently up at his face. “Abandonment issues.”

“Tae,” Jeongguk whines through the line. The sound so pitiful and familiar it makes Taehyung snicker. “Don’t be an ass.”

��It’s fine. He's fine,” Taehyung says as he scratches Yeontan’s ears. He slouches back further in the couch with a sigh. “He just misses you.”

“Miss him too,” Jeongguk says quietly.

It’s been a little hard on him. Both of them. Taehyung knows some people might call them dramatic for being so moody over Jeongguk going away on a 1-month-brother-bonding-camping-trip in the national parks of the USA. People have called them dramatic. (One person. Yoongi.) But Taehyung’s a soft bitch when it comes to Jeongguk and Jeongguk’s even softer. Two losers in love.

Taehyung grabs the remote and turns off the TV. Only wants to hear Jeongguk’s voice breaking the silence. “What’s happening today?”

“Going on a hike,” Jeongguk says. All the Jeon boys seem to do is hike. Taehyung’s messages from Jeongguk are filled with pics of them on mountains, hills, and near lakes. Cheeks glowing pink and sunburned. Limbs tanned and muscular. Lips stretched in wide smiles so similar they could only be between siblings.

“Don’t get eaten by a bear or anything.”

“You know I’d kill to get back to you.”

“Intruding on a wild animal’s territory and then punishing them by murder when they get defensive. That’s so hot, babe.”

“Anything for you, babe.”

Taehyung snorts. “Nothing like a dead animal rug to declare your eternal love.”

“Exactly.”

Taehyung can still hear Jeongguk puttering about in the background. The familiar sound of bottle caps being popped open. The start of Jeongguk’s extensive skin care regime.

“How’s the toiletry bag holding up?” Taehyung got him a new one especially for this trip; big enough to hold all of Jeongguk’s numerous products. Didn’t even make that much fun of him for having more cremes than any girl Taehyung claims to know. Completely caved and told Jeongguk he was absolutely right to take good care of his skin and be consistent with his dermatologist prescribed acne medication when Jeongguk wouldn’t stop pouting.

“Good,” says Jeongguk. “‘S real nice.” He sounds absent and Taehyung can easily picture him leaning in close to the mirror, focused on applying everything in all the right spots. Just like he does at home. “Junghyun says I can’t wear my perfume anymore,” Jeongguk continues. “Says it attracts all the insects.”

“So he’s stifling your gay?”

“He’s not stifling my gay,” Jeongguk snipes, always so easily wound up. “Skin care isn’t gay, Taehyung. Maybe you should give it a little more thought, so it won’t look like I’m taking Grandpa out on a date in 40 years.”

Taehyung chuckles, feels his heart beat warm and sluggish at the thought of still having Jeongguk on his arm 40 years from now. “Bet your ass would be all over big dicks and older men.”

“If I like big dicks then what the hell am I doing with you?”

Taehyung shakes with laughter hard enough for Yeontan to awkwardly scramble around for balance on his legs. “Calm down, size queen.”

“You calm down,” Jeongguk says, but there’s more smile than bite in his voice. Taehyung swallows at the fondness there. He misses teasing Jeongguk in person. Sharing a bathroom in the morning and smearing kisses covered in toothpaste on Jeongguk’s neck. Trying to avoid Jeongguk ripping him a new asshole with the brutal whip of a towel. Jeongguk giving back as good as he gets.

The conversation falls quiet after that, Taehyung content to just listen to Jeongguk starting his day halfway across the world. Petting Yeontan and offering useless clothing advice as Jeongguk gets dressed. Trying to feel close to him from far away.

“So, do you still need help with the laundry?” Jeongguk inquires eventually, trying to stretch a conversation that’s coming to an end.

“It’s all good. Used your special cup and everything.”

“My special cup?”

“Yeah, to measure the detergent.”

There’s a dubious pause on the other end of the line. “You’re supposed to use the bottle cap, Tae. It’s concentrated liquid. What the hell did you use?”

Yeontan does end up on the floor this time as Taehyung launches himself off the couch. But he’s not in time to do anything but admire his floor covered in suds. Sometimes the small ways of missing someone really matter.

———-

@ghouliecruz I just wrote for the first time in over a year especially for your overworked sleep-deprived ass because that’s how amazing a person I am. So you better take me out for Asian food soon.

#taekook is disgusting in this #literally that sappy couple you can't stand #i'm with yoongi #taekook fanfic #bts fanfic #mirre writes #taekook #mirre answers

42 notes · View notes

praphit · 5 years ago

Text

Gretel & Hansel: White people, hear me!

I know, I know, some of y'all were hoping that my next review would be Taylor Swift's "Miss Americana".

I'm sorry to disappoint you. Why and how is she still making movies anyway? I thought that everyone associated with "Cats" had been banned from Hollywood.

Now, it WOULD be cool, if Taylor got involved in Horror. I'm thinking that a bunch of horror monsters could get together to track her down; kinda like a contest. They would, you know... do their thing to her, and then bring her back from the dead in the sequel, and repeat the process. Every now and then, they could throw in Justin Bieber or someone else with his same level of annoyance. BOOM! Franchise! So, donate to Praphit Productions (millions), so I can make that happen. I'll just CG Taylor Swift in, if I have to; I'm sure she'd be ok with that.

Just picture Jason Voorhees or Kanye West chasing her.

No, people, I'm here to talk to y'all about Hansel & Gretel!

No, no, no, I'm sorry! "Gretel and Hansel!"

I almost forgot about that blow up in their studio. Y'all remember that?

Sophia Lillis' (who plays Gretel - SHE’S GREAT IN THIS-BTW) first day on the set was raw!

She walked up to the director and was like "Bleep this bleep! Who is Hansel? Who the bleep is he?! No one knows that actor! What is he, like 5 years old? Bleep him! How is his name first?! So, a woman can't lead a man, huh??! It's always gotta be Hansel first, right?! And what always happens?! That witch bitch always tries to eat them! Bleep that! Y'all know who I is! I'm Sophia bleeping Lillis! I was in "It" one AND two. What has "Sammy Leakey" (playing Hansel) been in??!

Not a damned thing! I want my name first! You will put it first or so help me God, I will UNLEASH THE FURY!"

Director (Oz Perkins): "I actually like that idea"

SL: "I don't give a bleep what you like! Just make it happen!"

Then, she went to her trailer, and when she came back out, it was "Gretel & Hansel".

(Hansel’s not even in the shot. Lillis was too raw for him.)

Let's see if Gretel fairs better in this story, now that she's getting the chance to lead.

We all know this Brothers Grimm story. There's a family (I don't know what Gretel & Hansel's last name is... we'll just say "Shakur"). So, the Shakur Family was struck by a famine in the land. Stuff happens, and G & H end up off on their own, in the woods, and eventually meet up with a witch, who later tries to eat them.

White people, hear me! Are you listening? STOP GOING INTO THE WOODS! Seriously, STOP! I'm trying to save you. Black people know better, but y'all... smh. I know y'all like to go hiking, and camping, and taking selfies on mountain tops and shit, but PLEASE... STOP! Nothing good is waiting for you out there!

Quit going into the woods to get footage of alleged monsters/spirits. Quit going into the woods to spend the night in cabins. Quit going into the woods to party on the anniversary of the night that 12 people were mysteriously murdered in those same woods. STOP!

JUST STOP! DAMN!

Some of you might be thinking, "Well maybe Gretel will make it. Maybe now that she's leading the duo, things will be different." Nope, she's white... *sigh* so we all know what she and Hansel did... went right into the woods.

This movie is mainly from Gretel's perspective. Right from the jump, we see Gretel being pimped out by her mama. Gretel of course declines to become a professional hoe, but when she comes back to her mama for a possible different direction in life, Mama is like "Would it have killed you to get on your knees for your family?! We're starving!"

I know - Mom of the Year.

Dad isn't even around. I may have missed something, but I don't remember where he was, or if maybe he ran away, a long time ago. One of those "Daddy went to get a pack of cigs, and never came back" scenarios. He may be off in a land flowing with Big Macs and Fries, Idk. Or maybe, being that his "selfish" daughter wouldn't put-out, he decided to get to work on the corner himself. Who knows where he was in this movie??

Gretel was def tough though. And she loved her brother! She was very protective of him. There is a scene where there's some sort of vampire creature chasing down Hansel, and Gretel stands up to the creature. That's the type of character that she is in this movie. She's smart, tough, and though sometimes hard on her bro, she loves him very much.

Hansel on the other hand is annoying as shit. And Dumb! Man, is he dumb! I'm surprised that we never see Gretel slap him. But, she is always able to compose herself in the midst of her annoying brother, and keep the journey going. She even calms him down at one point with some drugs. They end up eating some shrooms on their trip. Now, THAT'S love, people! Seeing someone in need of calming the bleep down, and offering them some good shit. What's a road trip without a moment when the group gets high??

There's a Lando-looking character that they meet along the way.

He doesn't have much of a role in this movie. I'm not saying it's because he's black, BUT he's a fascinating, noble character, who's black and barely in the movie. And they do not trust him at all. I'm not saying it's because he's black... you know what?? - YES! Yes I am saying that!

He saves their lives, offers them food and shelter, and gives them specific instructions that will keep them safe. But, after that (the only character so far that has had G & H's best interests in mind), Gretel immediately questions his motives. White women, hear me! If a black man willingly sticks out his neck for you, IN THE DARKNESS, in order to save YOUR life, that's a man that you can trust. Cuz we (black men) all know, that if we try to save a white woman out in public (even if we succeed), there's a good chance that the cops will still swing by to shoot us. They're thinking just like Gretel is in this movie - "I know it LOOKS like they saved her, but... can we really trust him? - let's shoot him just in case." Granted, this Landoish character sends them off (again with instructions for their safety). They had no quarrels about leaving (and quickly).

So, they runaway from the compassionate black man, who just saved them, and they meet an old lady (the witch) who has black fingers, and house smells a lil like death... and they say to themselves "Let's sleep here!" Ain't that some shit??!

White people, HEAR ME!

STOP!

They don't even question her black fingers, they just let her handle their food. I question people of whom I don't know, with normal fingers, handling my food, but... I guess that's just me.

Then, the rest of the story is legend.

The production design in this movie is absolutely amazing! If this film had no dialogue, and was just silent, it still would have been a beautiful movie (despite the cannibalism:)

The plot, I felt, was secondary to the cinematography.

Some of you might say, "Well that's nice and all, but is the movie scary? Does the witch, at some point, rev-up a chainsaw, and chase the two kids around her house?" No. "Ok, but does the movie, at some point, have little, pale Asian kids making creepy noises at H & G while they're trying to sleep?" NO! "Yeah, but is there some sort of human centipede action happening in the basement of the witch, and she tries to..."

NO! NO! HELL NO! What's wrong with y'all?!

No, none of that. The story that The Brothers Grimm have painted is horrifying enough. Famine and crappy parenting, leading to witch who wants to eat you... I'd say that's all that's required; the director knows this.

They don't need to use any gimmicks, just the same story (pretty much), a lil dark magic, the mentioned cinematography, and well-placed spooky music keep the movie in a consistent place of dread.

I think RT got this one wrong (59%). I don't have much bad to speak of, concerning this movie. I can't give it an A grade, due to it being a copy of a story that we've seen copied many times before. Plus, there are some ending issues I have with it, that I'll get to in a sec. BUT, this film is a hell of a B grade :)

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!

SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WARNED YOU!

A few things:

Soooooo, Gretel has some sort of connection to the witch that is never explained. Apparently, she has within her, the same powers as the witch.

She ends up sending her bro off to Lord knows where. She sends him off on a horse that she says she SPOKE TO, and he (the horse) will get Hansel there (where? who knows??) safely. So, she's talking the animals now?? When did she pick-up that skill? And where the bleep did she even get a horse?

There's some super grease that her and the witch use to do magic, that is never explained.

Now, none of this took away from my enjoyment of the film, but... still though.

There's a message of false empowerment at the end. Like I said, she abandons her brother, so that she can... fulfill her destiny or something. She has dark magic in her, but she is convinced that she'll use it for good. Like I said, Gretel is a SMART character... what happened to all of that smart? It's like saying "Hey, I have this STD, but instead of tending to it, I'm going to use my STD for good. It's going to be hard, but I've gotta be strong."

WHAT?!

I said "false empowerment". The movie isn't painting a picture of this being a good thing, but the "false" part is subtle enough to where people could walk away thinking it's an empowering message.

You abandoned your brother to become a witch! But, maybe I'm not being fair. Perhaps Gretel will be just fine. Throughout the history of human beings, we've had many people who were in power, and who thought that not allowing their power to be checked was the brave and noble thing to do. I think those times in history all worked out well right??

I could have added some pics to accentuate my last statement, but I feel it might have been a little too real:)

So, instead I'll leave y'all with this slightly less horrifying pic

... and bid you adieu.

STAY OUT OF THE WOODS!

#gretel & hansel #john praphit #praphitproductions.com #movies #Movie Reviews #Horror Movies #praphit #taylor swift #miss americana #sophia lillis #oz perkins #hanselandgretel #witches #cats #black people #white people

8 notes · View notes

rwbyremnants · 5 years ago

Link

WARNING: Pain and scarification, urine.

NOTE: Welcome to 2020! Time to keep this Freezerburn train a-rollin'!

=Chapter 11

Shopkeeper’s went dead silent the moment Weiss entered with the Belladonnas. It was a lot emptier than usual to begin with; most tables were empty, and Ilia wasn’t buzzing around. Blake was probably relieved about that. Meanwhile, Vernal and the pair of older women at one of the tables gave them a nasty look when they saw the platinum-haired girl in their midst again.

“Well, well,” Cinder called out harshly from their usual corner. Emerald was there, sipping at a glass, but the others were nowhere to be found. “You’re a bigger idiot than I thought.”

“Enough,” said Kali, and Cinder fell silent, not having expected the older woman to address her. “She’s going straight through to the boss.”

The smouldering eyes flew wide. After a moment, she stood up and approached the three, who were now closer to the center of the establishment. “Want me to take her?”

“Please.”

“Got it.” Now, Cinder seemed to be playing her emotions close to the chest, whereas her hostility had been open and raw a moment before. Her eyes were calculating, moving between Weiss and the two Italian Dragons on either side of her. “I’ll… go ask. What should I tell her?”

“That she wishes to be tested.”

“Alright.”

With that, Cinder slipped into the back room. The instant she was gone, Blake moved to sit with Emerald, and Kali turned Weiss just enough so that she could catch hold of her shoulders. The leather jacket looked a little strange on top of the pretty dress, but also somehow suited the older woman. Weiss would have to remember that combination for the future.

“Remember what I told you,” she said in a gentle voice. “It’s going to seem worse than it is. Just… bite your tongue when you feel the desire to shoot your mouth off, and keep to ‘Yes, High Dragon’ and ‘No, High Dragon’ as often as you can. If you do anything stupid, I’ll try to intercede on your behalf before you get roughed up, but try not to need me to in the first place. I won’t be going in with you, and until you prove yourself, you can’t count on Cinder to watch your back since she still thinks you’re a stoolie.”

“I’ll be careful,” she promised her with a sober nod. “I promise.”

“Alright.” Her lips pressed into Weiss’s forehead, and she sighed at the minimal comfort they provided. “Good luck. Be smart.”

It only took another minute or so for Cinder to ease the door open and say, “She’ll see you now.”

The back room was quite smoky, compared with the front room which was always smoke-free. Weiss coughed, not used to breathing in more than the occasional wisp of her father’s cigars. Several booths lined the smaller room, and in the very back corner was the shadowy figure she had glimpsed before, enshrouded in her cloak as always.

“Sit,” Salem ordered. Weiss sat across from her. “Cinder tells me you sought an audience.”

“Yes, High Dragon.”

A quiet hum of appreciation came from the shadows, and she saw Cinder nodding where she stood by the table out of the corner of her eye. But she didn’t make the mistake of letting herself get distracted; Kali had told her to keep her full attention on Salem at all times. Along with a lot of other things that she secretly hoped would never come into play… and that she didn’t forget them if they were needed.

“You have manners, after all. Now, what brings you here? Being tested? Do you understand what that means?”

“Yes, High Dragon. I wish to… apologise for what happened, and to explain. And b-be tested if it please you.”

“I don’t enjoy tall tales. You have one minute.”

So Weiss crammed her story into a single minute. She was still explaining what she had shouted at her father after he slapped her when Salem held up a pale hand to silence her. In the low lighting, she could tell it was yet paler than her own skin - almost completely devoid of any pigment at all. But she couldn’t see it for long enough to tell for certain before the hand withdrew into the shadows again.

“Very well. You stood in defiance and he struck you, and struck us. I expected no less of Jacques Schnee.”

“You know my father?”

“Not intimately. Only by reputation.” She produced a cigarette on a stem, and Cinder immediately leapt to light it for her, the Zippo seeming to come from nowhere. After a puff or two, she breathed a cloud in Weiss’s face, and she couldn’t help coughing. “Poor baby.”

“Sorry, High Dragon,” she gagged.

“You expect me to believe this fish story?”

“It is the truth. I… wish anything else had happened.”

“Then you are willing to submit to my test?”

The possibilities flashed through Weiss’s mind. Kali had told her about all of them, and while she despised some of the notions even more than the others, the idea of Yang and the rest of the Dragons never believing her was much worse. “I am, High Dragon. If it please you.”

“Very well. Cinder… fetch the box.”

With a clipped bow, Cinder went into a door leading off from the back of the back room. Though she didn’t take her eyes off the end of Salem’s glowing cigarette, her mind wandered to how the brunette Dragon was behaving. This was a level of obedience she didn’t even think Cinder was capable of. She never seemed to care much what anyone else thought or felt. Apparently, the boss truly commanded her respect in ways no one else could.

“Here, High Dragon,” she said as she set the small wooden chest down in the booth bench next to Salem.

“Thank you.” She flipped the top of the chest open and began to rummage around the inside. “Hmm… not today. I never use this on girls her age. That one is interesting…”

Gulping, Weiss finally did spare a glance at Cinder, and saw she was completely at ease. Not darkly excited to see her be tortured, but neither was she worried about Weiss at all. She was doing her job; a consummate professional.

“Here. Yes, I really feel this is the right way to go.”

When she looked to the tabletop, she saw Salem’s ghostly hand laying down a small metal implement. It was a branding iron, if Weiss didn’t miss her guess. The bottom of her stomach fell even further. Though it was not the worst of the possibilities Kali had told her about on the drive over - which she had seemingly given a miss due to her age - it was definitely not the least worrisome, either.

“Yes, High Dragon. Where…” She had to swallow down her fear, forcing her voice to be as steady as she could. “Where… will you…?”

“Ooh, brave girl,” she chuckled, motioning for Cinder to take it. She did, and flicked her lighter again, holding the flame on the business end of the brand. “That is the question, isn’t it? Where will you let me mark you forever?”

“I wouldn’t presume to tell you, High Dragon.”

“I’m asking. Where would you prefer it?”

It didn’t take Weiss much time to think. “M-my back, somewhere. I think.”

“Hmm. That ashamed to see your pretty skin has been disfigured, are we? It already has been once.” The finger that lashed out to slide down the scar below her left eye was gone an instant after it appeared, not even giving Weiss enough time to flinch until afterward. “Very well. I think I should like you to come around here by me.”

As Weiss rounded the table, the mysterious woman moved the chest so that Weiss could sit. Then she put a hand in the middle of Weiss’s back. At first, she was confused, but the gentle pressure got her to bend over the table, knees resting on the bench.

“Good. I’ve made my decision, and I know what my target should be.” As the hand pressed her into the table a little harder, she asked, “You are aware of the consequences if you resist?”

“Yes, High Dragon.” Kali had told her; if she panicked and ran away, or otherwise interrupted the test, she would prove herself a coward and they would either have to start over, or she would simply never be trusted again, depending on Salem’s mood. It was not wise to challenge that mood at all.

But she felt sorely tempted to challenge when she felt a hand hiking her skirt up, tucking it into the collar of her sweater. She couldn’t help but let out a quiet “No” when she felt the fingers wrapping around the waistband of her panties.

“What was that?” Salem asked mildly.

“N-nothing, High Dragon,” she promised her.

“Good.” The underwear was yanked down - probably more violently due to her involuntary protest. A hand ghosted over one of her bare cheeks. Weiss had never felt her heart race this fast in her entire life, not even all those times Yang had kissed her. This was fear without any of the excitement, any guilty anticipation. Pure dread. “Are you right-handed or left-handed?”

“Left,” she told her.

“This one, then.” It was the left cheek already. “Cinder, is it ready?”

“Almost, High Dragon.” The flame from the lighter wasn’t big enough to have heated the hot poker yet.

“Here,” Salem said, pressing a leather cuff against Weiss’s mouth. When she only looked at her in confusion, she added, “To bite down on. Or don’t you want it?”

“Yes, High Dragrphhh,” she said as it was slid between her teeth. She hated to think about where the leather had been - or what it had been used for.

“Good girl. Cinder, show her.”

Then the brand was displayed to her eyes, glowing cherry red a few inches away so she could feel the warmth pouring off it in waves. The brand design was a very small version of the Asian dragon that graced the backs of their jackets. No letters, no other finery; only the dragon itself. After a second or two, Cinder took it away again, and the shadow of the image was still burned into her vision temporarily.

“Are you ready? A nod will do.” Weiss nodded, and Salem patted the small of her back as Cinder went back to heating it to make sure it was ready. “Now… do you swear to me that everything you have told me is the truth?” Another nod. “Do you swear loyalty to the Dragons above all others, including family, country, and other rival organizations?” Though she wanted to protest, she knew better than to openly defy Salem - especially under these circumstances. So she nodded again. “Do you swear to uphold our traditions, our ideals, and never to betray one of us to an outside party?” Another nod - and she hoped Salem couldn��t tell that her cheeks were clenching.

“Very well. Weiss Schnee, I hereby mark you as one of our own.”

It was only at that moment, between the words and the following action, that Weiss fully understood the implications of what she had just done. Blue eyes pulled wide as saucers, and her breath caught fast. She hadn’t simply assured the Dragons that she harboured no ill will toward them and was not directly responsible for the raid on Junior’s.

Weiss Schnee had become a Dragon.

Then searing heat was biting into her hind-flesh, and she screamed.

Everything went blank for a few seconds, possibly minutes. When she could focus again, it was to feel a cold, wet cloth being pressed into the brand. It made her growl into the leather again, tasting her own tears that had ran down over her upper lip, but she held perfectly still.

“Good girl,” Salem purred softly, almost lovingly. “You didn’t even thrash or fall off the table. More of the girls do that than you would think, tough as they are now.”

The other hand jerked the leather free, and she saw her own teeth marks in it as it was taken away. Voice weak, she managed to mumble, “Tha… thank you, High Dragon.”

“You’re welcome.” Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Cinder returning with a towel. “Ah, there we are. And you shouldn’t feel ashamed; better women than you have lost control when being branded. All in all, your voluntary reactions say much more about you than the involuntary ones. A true Dragon should be able to stand a little fire, and you did. Very encouraging.”

Though Weiss was confused, she felt the towel sliding across the table and patting her inner thighs and the confusion was gone. She had wet herself. Why didn’t she even remember that taking place? Shame burned in her cheeks now that she realised that had happened, and she tried to turn her face away, but the feeling of the towel grazing her unmentionable area made it impossible to escape the reality entirely.

Clearly, Salem was going to leave it to Cinder to do the clean-up work, because she was focusing on words now. “So your father decided to take it upon himself to punish us all for your indiscretion?”

“H-he did, High Dragon. I had no idea until today, when… Blake told me about the raid.”

“Mmm. A powerful man like that has the ear of the Sheriff whenever he wishes.” Salem’s fingertips drummed on the table as she felt the cold cloth being flipped over on her burn, and she hissed from the pain. “And you have his ear, typically.”

“I do. When… when I’m behaving, he…”

“You’re going to maintain that. For now. We can use it to our advantage. For example… one of our own may lose her moll.”

“Velvet?” she asked, and she heard an approving hum. “I… I w-was going to talk to him about her father, High Dragon. She shouldn’t have to… to go all the way back to Australia.”

“You’re full of pleasant surprises, Rookie. Very well. Assure him that you’re back to being his perfect little girl. Be more discreet when venturing here or out with Yang. Ask for the favour. Velvet isn’t a Dragon - not yet - but she means a great deal to Adel. I’d never begrudge one of my girls a warm bed companion. Accomplish this little task, and we’ll see what else we can do with you.”

Blushing from how forthright she was being, and also the hands still dressing the wound on her rear end, Weiss thought about that. Maybe Salem wasn’t as cruel as she had been led to believe. Then again, she had just branded her, so the truth was probably that she was both cruel and kind in equal measure.

“So then you believe me, High Dragon?”

“I didn’t say that. I’m willing to give you the benefit of a doubt, because you put yourself through this initiation. More hazing will likely come from the others. Trust is something you build, not a single decision.”

“Yes, High Dragon. Thank you.”

“You must really love my Baby Dragon.”

“What?”

“Yang,” she clarified as Cinder finally tugged her underwear back into place. She could feel some dampness near one of the leg holes and dearly hoped it was from the rag. “I have a feeling we wouldn’t be here right now if you weren’t so hopelessly devoted to her.”

Weiss cleared her throat. “Y-yes, High Dragon. I… I love her.” She was shocked at the honesty in her own voice.

“Then remember well: if you disappoint her, you’ll be disappointing me. I’m grooming her to take over the organization when I’m gone, you know. She is something like…” Salem considered for a moment. “Somewhere between a daughter and a protege. I’m sure you understand.”

“Of course, High Dragon. I won’t let you down.”

“More promises. We shall see. Cinder?”

Cinder didn’t have to be told twice. As she steered the shell-shocked initiate back through the door, she grumbled, “I wish I was in Yang’s position.”

“What?” she gasped, blinking numbly. “You mean… you and I-”

“No, no,” she grunted impatiently. “Even though I guess I did finally get to rub you.” At Weiss’s shocked expression, she snapped, “Don’t be a baby. I don’t care about cleaning up your piss one way or the other; I’m joking. You need thicker skin, Princess.”

Stubbornly pushing through that topic, she said, “Then what did you mean?”

“Her position in line to be the next High Dragon. But I suppose I should be satisfied with having Salem’s trust.” Her eyes slid aside to look at Weiss. “The way you seem to now.”

“But she said she doesn’t trust me.”

“Actually, she did, but she didn’t say she mistrusts you entirely. Which is more than I could say for most stool pigeons who tried to get back into her good graces.”

“I swear, everything I said was true,” Weiss told her as they arrived at the table. Kali was already in the kitchens again, but Blake and Emerald were waiting to see what happened. “I know… I know how it seemed to you, and I understand now why you all looked like you wanted me dead in school. But all I can do is swear on a stack of Bibles that I didn’t do anything to hurt Yang, and never would!”

“Great for Yang,” Emerald scoffed. “What about the rest of us?”

“Give it a rest,” Blake sighed. “She’s been through a lot the past week. Daddy gave her a ‘love tap’.”

That silenced the green-haired girl immediately. She glanced at Cinder, who was also keeping quiet. A moment later, she stalked off toward the bar.

“Her parents weren’t any better. She gets it.”

Weiss remembered being told that Cinder had a pretty unfortunate life until this point. Maybe a history of abusive parents was a piece of that puzzle. Watching the woman order alcohol only seemed to confirm it; though she didn’t know her very well, she could guess that this topic being brought up again might drive someone to drink. After all… it did the same thing to her own mother.

“He really hit you?” Emerald asked, breaking her from her reverie.

“Yes,” she sighed, touching her cheek as the memory resurfaced. “Wasn’t the first time, but… I really thought it would never happen again. Shows what I know.”

“Don’t blame yourself,” Blake cut in immediately, standing and taking up her hand. It seemed that most of her reservations about Weiss had gone away again now that she had proven herself. “You’re a teenager. We all are; we’re not supposed to be the ones controlling our emotions.”

Deflating with relief, she said, “Thank you. It’s so good to hear someone say that! Well, besides your mother.”

Emerald laughed a little, finishing off her current drink as Cinder drifted back toward the table. “Been here three times and you already have Kali fussing over you.”

“Ugh,” Blake grunted.

“It’s nice,” Weiss said earnestly. “She’s really nice. And I mean… I missed that. Having a mom.”

“Yeah,” Emerald chuckled, though it was more subdued. “I mean, my mom was alright. But I’m fine without her.”

Maybe it was an awkward question, but Weiss decided to take her chances. “Are a lot of Dragons orphans? Runaways?”

“What do you think?” Cinder snapped as she set her glass down heavily. “Good little children with loving families always join gangs, don’t they? Oh wait - that’s not how it works.”

“Lay off,” Blake said, though not harshly. “She’s one of us now.”

“That’s right.” Her eyes focused on Weiss’s and she smirked very slightly. For some reason, she knew - knew in her gut that Cinder was about to mention her losing control of her bladder while being branded. But instead, all she said was, “One of us. The princess has become a dragon.”

“I still don’t know what that means,” Weiss admitted. “I have to do more, don’t I? To complete my… training, or whatever it is.”

“I just can’t believe you did it,” Emerald said, serious for once. “Thought you would run screaming before you became a thug like us.”

Cinder surprised them by speaking up. “Well, she did it. And she was less of a yellow-belly about it than you were.”

While Emerald was sputtering in mingled surprise and indignation, Blake giggled. Then she turned back to Weiss with a small, thoughtful smile. “I’m with Emerald, though. You really surprised me today, Schnee. Knew I liked you for a reason. Have a seat.”

She started to, then felt the pull of the tape holding the bandage in place. “Um… maybe I’d better stand.”

“Then sit here.” Without further ado, she pulled Weiss down to sit on her left thigh, so that the injured area hung off the side. She yelped in mild surprise and Emerald snickered, but Blake only looped an arm around her waist for support. “That’s better, isn’t it?”

“Depends on what you mean by ‘better’! For you, clearly!”

“I could start doing this…” Her leg jogged up and down, and Weiss hissed from the mingling pain and pleasure it brought her; she stopped soon after. “But no, I’m just trying to offer you an alternative seat. Don’t forget that it’ll be a few days before you can sit down regularly.”

“What am I going to do in school?” she whispered. “I have to sit all day!”

Leaning forward on her elbows, Emerald said, “Sit on Yang’s lap instead?”

“I’ll give you a special pillow,” Cinder promised her with a smirk. “With a little hole in it. We had it made just for this reason; most girls end up with it exactly where you did. Though you might look a little ridiculous carrying it from class to class…”

“Maybe, but it’s better than being in agony, or having teachers ask why I’m still standing,” she sighed, running her fingers through her bangs and still trying not to think about being this close to Blake. For her part, at least her hands weren’t wandering any further than Weiss’s stomach and the knee draped between both of her own. “Thank you, Cinder.”

“You two look cute together.”

They all turned to see Kali standing there, wearing two oven mitts and a playful expression. Immediately, Cinder piled on, “Don’t they, Miss Belladonna? Someone should take a Polaroid.”

“My little girl is growing up,” she said in a falsely sentimental voice, wiping away an imaginary tear.

“Ughhh,” Blake sighed again, though she didn’t force Weiss from her lap. “I’m just helping her heal her Dragon brand.”

That made the woman’s smile falter. “Oh? So… she went for that test. Interesting.”

“Why?” Weiss asked.

“She must see potential in you as a Dragon. Otherwise, she would have done something else. Either painful… or…” She shrugged, folding her arms below her ample bosoms. This time, Weiss noticed Emerald waggle her eyebrows as she watched them bounce slightly. “Well, we’ve all heard the stories. Or lived through it. All things considered, this does have farther-reaching consequences, but it could have been worse.”

“Made Velvet dance for her,” Cinder remarked. “Wasn’t too bad, but Velvet wasn’t as… comfortable showing off as she is now. A little burlesque show almost left her in tears.”

“Like you did,” Blake muttered.

“I did it because she wanted me to,” Cinder insisted through her teeth. “You’re all so willing to think I’m a sadist.”

“You are! There’s no ‘think’ about it!”

“But I’m not an unfeeling monster!”

“Now, now, girls,” Kali said as she slid into the seat next to her daughter. One of her hands wound up on Weiss’s arm, offering silent comfort; she appreciated that. “No bickering or I’ll send you home without supper. And I have a fine pair of pizza pies in the oven right now.”

Instantly, they all cried, “Pizza!” Kali tittered in approval.

#princess and the dragons #freezerburn fanfic #freezerburn #1950s au #rwby fanfiction #rwbyremnants #nsfw-Text #abuse tw

3 notes · View notes

waywardnerd67 · 6 years ago

Text

Under the Desk

Title: Under the Desk Square Filled: Office Sex Pairing: Dean x CEO!Reader Characters: Dean Winchester, Reader Warnings: Smut/PWP/AU Summary: After a day of long meetings, (Y/N) is frustrated and wanting to go home. When the newest employee of the mail room brings her a few items she decides to work late and asking for his help in a few matters. Word Count: 1465 Created for: @spnkinkbingo

Check Out: SPN Kink Bingo Masterlist

(Y/N) slumped down into her chair after her fourth meeting of the day feeling completely exhausted. She was positive that everyone in the world were complete, bumbling idiots. All she wanted to do now was gather her things, go home, drink a bottle of wine and read the rest of her trashy romance novel. When a knock came on her office door she groaned calling the person in.

Her jaw nearly dropped as a tall, handsome man walked in holding a few packages and mail for her. “Hello Miss (Y/L/N), your secretary was not outside, and I wanted to make sure you received these before you left.”

His voice was as smooth as whiskey sending delicious currents throughout her body. “You can set them here. Are you new?” she asked.

“Yes ma’am, my name is Dean Winchester. I just started a couple of weeks ago in the mail room. I hope you have a great night.” He said walking towards her office door.

(Y/N) bit her lip watching his perfect ass walk out. His long bowlegs carrying his lean body through the door and one large hand grasping the knob to close it. She let out the breath she had been holding when she could hear his cart rolling further away. As she sat in her office going through her mail, her thoughts kept drifting back to Dean and how she wanted to know more about him.

Pulling up his online employee file she found he had graduated from University of Kansas with a degree in business. He held odd and end jobs all around Kansas then moved out to California finding the first job he could in her mail room. He was listed as single with no dependents. He worked until nine in the evening sorting, filing and other odd jobs around the mail room.

She had a short debate in her head before picking up the phone calling down the manager in the mail room asking for Dean to come back to her office. When he knocked again, she took a deep breath before calling him in. He looked nervous as he walked in straightening his tie that laid perfectly down his broad chest.

“What can I do for you, Miss (Y/L/N)?” He asked as she motioned for him to take a seat.

She smiled at him crossing her legs under her desk relieving some of the pressure between her legs. “I wanted to take a moment to get to know our newest employee. Tell me a little bit why you moved here and took a job that is clearly below your level of education.”

He laughed softly before running his hand through his short sandy brown hair. “My parents retired to a secluded cabin in Sioux Falls, South Dakota. I wanted to be close to my family and my little brother is a lawyer out here. Him, his wife and two kids don’t live too far from my apartment. Family is important to me.”

She nodded a familiar ache in her heart pinging, “So, you took the first job you were offered?” He nodded smiling.

“I’m a hard worker and don’t mind working my way up. If I ever get the chance to work on something outside of the mail room I will. Make connections and network with other parts of your business. Best place to start is the one department that is apart of every department. There is always mail to be delivered.” He explained running his hand over his muscular thigh.

She drew in a deep breath before speaking, “I like the way you think. Why don’t you help me with some business models that have been giving me some trouble? No better person to network with than the CEO.”

Dean’s bright olive eyes shined with excitement as he nodded. She pulled out the plans she had been having meetings on all day and motioned from him to move a chair over next to her. After a few hours of having her first intelligent conversation about her vision for her company she looked down seeing it was well past Dean’s quitting time.

“Dean, I think I would like to move you from the mail room as soon as possible. You have a brilliant mind for thinking outside the box. I like that.” She said as he brushed his hand against her thigh by accident sending chills down her body.

“Thank you, Miss (Y/L/N), I would love that.” He said sitting back in his chair. His tied was loosened around his neck and the first few buttons were undone.

She placed her hand on top of his, “Please call me, (Y/N). Afterall I just kept you over your ending time. I apologize for that and will make sure you get paid for it.”

“No worries. Honestly, I had a lot of fun working with you. I have to say I was surprised when I heard that you were not married. A gorgeous, smart and funny woman is hard to find nowadays. Someone should have snatched you up by now.” His eyes went wide for a moment in fear, “Sorry… I probably shouldn’t have said that.”

(Y/N) laughed, “Quite already Dean. I was actually thinking the same thing about you. I’m sure you have women throwing themselves at you all the time.”

The smile on his face warmed her body as he bashfully rubbed the back of his neck, “Never the right woman. I’m not going to settle for anyone less than the right person.”

He looked right at her when he said that making her heart skip. The next thing she knew her body was getting up sitting on his lap as her lips came down against his. They were as soft and full as they looked moving perfectly against hers. His arms circled her waist keeping her securely on his lap. One of his hands slipped up her blouse kneading her breast through her lacy bra.

His lips moved down her neck as he stood up setting her on her desk. She undid his tie tossing it over his shoulder and started making her way down his shirt. She ran her fingers up under his t-shirt feeling his soft, flat stomach. Just as he was about to take off her blouse there was a knock on her door. She pushed Dean down under her desk as she sat in her chair hiding him completely.

“C-Come in.” She called out as the manager from the mail room walked in.

She felt Dean’s hands going up her legs hiking up her skirt around her waist. “I wanted to check with you Miss (Y/L/N) that Dean Winchester was really up here working?”

Dean was sliding her panties down her legs as his manager spoke to her. He spread them just enough to fit his head between them lapping her slick lips. “Y-Yes, he was helping me with a special project. I want to make sure he gets paid for an hour of overtime for helping me.”

(Y/N) was gripping the edge of her desk as Dean’s tongue flicked repeatedly over her aching clit. She did not know how much longer she could keep herself under control and prayed for the manager to leave. She slid closer to the edge of her chair giving Dean a little more room to work her over.

“Oh. Okay, I will make sure that is reflected on his paycheck. I just wanted to make sure he wasn’t skipping out on work. He just seems a little too good to be true on paper.” She nodded unable to speak since Dean had pushed two thick fingers into her.

She took a shaky breath, “That he does, but I assure you he is working hard.”

(Y/N) was so close to coming that he legs were trembling. Dean’s mouth was sucking on her clit as his finger pumped into her. She felt like her body was going to explode at any moment. She was thankful to see the manager walking towards her office door.

“Have a great night, ma’am.” He said walking out and closing the door behind him.

“Fuck!” she groaned coming hard on Dean hand as he curled his finger within her. He licked her clean pushing her chair out, so he could get from under her desk.

“Sorry, I could see how wet you were and could not help myself.” He said as she was leaning back panting.

He stood up her eyes landing on the long outline of his hard cock and she rolled her chair in front of him, “Only fair that I repay the favor.” She said undoing his pants letting his cock stand free from them.

He groaned as she wrapped her mouth around him, “Shit, I think I’m going to like this new partnership.”

If you enjoyed this story then check out my Masterlist!

My Nerd Herd: @waywardbaby @carryonmywaywardcaptain @ladywinchester1967 @akshi8278 @ericaprice2008 @mirandaaustin93 @spnbaby-67 @time-travel-bouqet @1967-essentialghoul @dean-winchesters-bacon @-lovepeacenhope- @destiel745 @carribear31 @srsllydunnodoncare @whimsicalrobots @thisismysecrethappyplace @starstruckzonkoperatorbat @adoptdontshoppets @mrswhozeewhatsis @bella-ca @drakelover78 @imascio08 @pisces-cutie @dwgrl1903 @mannls @the-salty-asian @winchesterprincessbride @xostephanie @klanceiscannon14 @superromijn @witch-of-letters @screechingartisancashbailiff @myinconnelly1 @sister-winchesters99 @thekatherinewinchester @babykalika2001 @maddiepants @tumbler-tidbits @sandlee44

#spnkinkbingo #under the desk #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester x ceo!reader #dean winchester au #dean winchester smut

89 notes · View notes

onouwu · 7 years ago

Text

Nekimo’s Story - Chapter 2 Part 1 - Pleasant Surprise

The guards bring Nekimo and her group to a river, allowing them to bathe and drink before the journey.

Nekimo looks at the thin middle-aged woman in her purple buttoned-down shirt and a white coat. She smiles, scoffing before she washes her face.

“Why are you here? Of course you’re valuable. I’ll need a doctor, but… Of all the people I expected to follow me, you’d be the last, followed closely by Dalia herself.”

Orisa seemed agitated. “You’re going to cause a lot of trouble, Nekimo. I’m just looking to keep people alive.”

Nekimo just smiled. “At least I know that if you betray me, it won’t be the death of us.”

A guard walks up to Nekimo and whispers to her.

"I pledged my loyalty to you, but if you do not have a plan, please just tell me this. I refuse to become their cannon fodder if you simply failed to do what you set out. Your display in front of Dalia was pathetic, I hope that was just an act. All of us are depending on your wit here. Your sister's failed promise of someday holding our own after our servitude is why I walk with you now"

Nekimo just smiled at her with assurance in her eyes as one of the overseers began speaking.

"Seven miles down the mountain is a group we want you to take over. Our army could swoop in at any time, but we've decided it's prisoner work. Report back after you've slain every last one of the people within the camp and you will be given another job."

Nekimo knew the story wasn't right. She has seen the map of their territory and that spot has been there for nearly a decade.

After the arduous trip downward, they spot a massive forest which serves as a border surrounding the bald mountain.

While the Adaego scout the way through the densely forested area, Nekimo spots a line of rusty vehicles covered in dense vines and grass. Despite the slight decay they don’t look very old, and might probably still run if their tires weren’t flattened. Rather, they look as if they were abandoned for some years.

“There’s your target” the officer points beyond the vehicles deep into the forest.

Watching Nekimo and her tribe move, the Adaego guards stand by. Nekimo walks forward until she can no longer see them. She stops to take a breath. Burning and sore, the long walks of the day cause her legs to tremble and forces her to sit. Her group of twelve taking the cue to do the same.

The forest feels rather peaceful now while the twitching and burning muscles in her legs calm down. Lying back, the grass is soft and cool; the large tree next to her creating a nice shade.

“Orisa, why do you care about them so much? I know you don’t get preferential treatment there. I remember when you first came back from there you fell asleep at your front door, too tired to open it … I thought you’d be glad to be back, but you returned the next day, as if you hadn’t done enough for them.”

“They aren’t work, Nekimo. They are people … Living, breathing people. Our kingdom has a kind leader; she takes care of her people and unlike the Adaego, we felt warmth and kindness every day because that’s the kind of people we are.

“There’s no we when you talk of my sister’s tribe.” Nekimo interjected.

Orisa nodded and continued.

“They… they have a different society than we do. Their values and virtues are not the same as ours. Honor replaces kindness and hearts are not always open. You might see them as mindless warriors but, when someone truly cares for them…

It changes you. You will never understand that. You’ve never shown them compassion… nobody has. They’re beautiful and passionate people just as we are.”

A woman appears beyond the trees which cuts their conversation short. She is pale and light blonde, lighter skin than the Adaego tribeswomen. Dressed in camouflage pants and heavy boots with a black tee, Her pale rosy face and delicate frame makes her look gentle and disarming, though Nekimo knows from her own appearance that such traits can be misleading.

Going against Adaego orders, Nekimo motions her fighters to stand down.

The woman draws a large pistol, her stance wide and ready to shoot. The gun looks brand new unlike those she is used to being bought and sold between the surrounding tribes.

The woman gazes over the bodies of Nekimo's troop and takes aim at one of the archers at the forefront of the group.

"We were sent by our tribe to give you an urgent message. The Adaego are at war with us and we beg of your help." Nekimo kneels and rests her hands on her knee, those surrounding her confused but silent, knowing well of her testing nature.

She lowers her gun "We have no interest in local politics. However, you all look very hungry. Please stop by our camp and have a meal if this war of yours allows you that."

Nekimo takes on a more confident, authoritative tone as she gets into her role. "We will be much stronger with full bellies and rested heads. We will accept your offer.”

The pale looking blonde walks into the bushes and motions the group to follow.

Ginika whispers to Nekimo

"Nekimo, why are you talking like your sister?"

"She's told me about people like this. Outsiders, they have certain expectations of how we act. Pretend you know nothing of the world and their guard will be down."

"I see. I’m glad to know you still have a plan. From your expression earlier, it looked as if you knew we were being sent to our death!" Ginika smiled, walking along.

The girl leading them turns around a second and smiles while keeping pace.

"My name is Lilith Jarvi, or Lilly, I am the lead assistant for the research group here."

"You are not a soldier or a scout?" Nekimo asked

"Oh I... mean yes. I'm also a guard for the camp."

Nekimo simply nods and keeps following with her tribe alongside her. the girl walks quickly to her camp.

Finally, they get to what looks like twenty or so vans all busted down with flat tires, some of which have completely rusted out while others look almost brand new. Women who look much different from each other with various ethnic features. Most wear hiking gear and plain clothes. all are carrying weapons, two women with long scoped rifles surround a redheaded woman in a lab coat who seems to be the only unarmed there. She quickly notices the group as if she were expecting someone.

Lilly yells out as she steps from the bushes into the open area spotted with stumps. "I've found a tribe who has been fighting with Adaego. They're looking for a place to eat and rest the night. I'm sure we can accommodate them"

"This is Cassidy Lundh, she is the leader of this troop and the top scientist here.

"Nice to meet you!" the woman walks over, also pale but freckled with a petite build and long wavy dark red hair down to her shoulders. A small device loops around her ear with a coiled wire leading into the collar of her white buttoned down shirt. She goes to shake Nekimo's hand which she awkwardly accepts. Cassidy pats herself on the chest and coughs, turning away politely.

Spotting the concern in Nekimo’s eyes she responds "Don't worry about me, make yourself at home for now. We’ll take care of everyone here.”

Cassidy motions a woman to come over to her as she walks away momentarily to discuss something.

"You, however! You have some work to do. We need to have things ready for the guests you brought here." Cassidy laughed and turned around while Lilly flinched. The fear that she felt from the girl briefly took Nekimo's attention from the armed guards.

Nekimo turned around to her friend "Ginika, did you notice? - She knew we were here before we stepped foot in her presence."

Ginika whispered back "She was very relaxed. Do you suspect Adaego are working with them?"

"Possibly. I've never seen anyone so calm around armed soldiers; Not even Dalia herself."

Lilly walked up to Nekimo "Cool off a while for now, our cook is working to make a large meal for everyone in your tribe this evening"

"Many thanks" She let out, slightly sarcastic, already tired of her fake tone.

Nekimo went off talking to some of the people within the camp. She went up to the armed women with rifles. One being a medium built brown curly haired woman of South-Asian descent with very sleek looking blue framed visors “It’s customary of our people to introduce ourselves to the royal guard of our neighbors. What are your names?”

“Wanda Laghari”

The other woman with straight jet-black hair, and sharp lips smiled.

“Hailey Kwan”

Nekimo introduces herself, then leans in a little and whispers.

“So, who put her in charge?” hoping to get a bit of history on the camp’s politics. Instead, being met with an uncomfortable length of silence.

With a nod she walks off to talk to some others, getting just as little information as before.

By the time she finished meeting the people of the camp, she returned to what was left of her group sticking together more curious than satisfied.

ch2pt2 Click here

8 notes · View notes

pansexual-potatoes · 4 years ago

Text

Who is your hero?: I don’t have one.

If you could live anywhere, where would it be?: I’d become a woods witch, of sorts. I picture it as a cabin so deep in the woods you only find it if you’re lost. Me, my dog and Frank (if we’re theoretically still married) in a very cute cabin with a little mailbox that’s never used and a short walkway to nowhere in particular. I’d have foxglove and lupine up front, hosta and ferns in the shaded areas and a wooden fence around my garden. No driveway but I’d have a shed with a snowmobile, snowblower, and shovel for the winter and a four wheeler, and a tiny car for the summer. I’d have a fire pit for campfires, a hot tub and a pool. Attached to the back of the house would be a greenhouse with a dining area for warm weather. Despite my rural living, I’d get great cell service and excellent internet.

What is your biggest fear?: Losing the people I care about.

What is your favorite family vacation?: My family growing up didn’t do vacations but my husband and I do. I also do fun stuff with my best friend.

What would you change about yourself if you could?: My looks

What really makes you angry?: Disrespect

What motivates you to work hard?: I have bills to pay, and we need to eat.

What is your favorite thing about your career?: I enjoy the plants. I work in a commercial greenhouse and for most of the year the plants are really nice.

What is your biggest complaint about your job?: the pay and lack of needed benefits are big problems.

What is your proudest accomplishment? I’m still here.

What is your child's proudest accomplishment?: Bailey learned to lay down. So far he’s learned Sit, Shake and lay down. I think next we’ll teach him to stay.

What is your favorite book to read?: cookbooks, lol. I actually love reading but my eyes can’t do it much anymore.

What makes you laugh the most?: memes

What was the last movie you went to? What did you think? I don’t like movie theaters. I think the last movie I saw in one was the newest grinch movie and I thought it was a cute movie. I liked how they humanized him and brought his situation into scale.

What did you want to be when you were small? An oceanographer, then a marine biologist

What does your child want to be when he/she grows up? Bailey, I’m assuming, wants to be a smart, happy and curious doggo.

If you could choose to do anything for a day, what would it be? Mentally healthy

What is your favorite game or sport to watch and play? I don’t watch sports.

Would you rather ride a bike, ride a horse, or drive a car? Depends on what I’m doing. If I’m in hell being punished, then you’ll see me on a bike. Horses are nice for leisure. Car if I have errands to run or am busy.

What would you sing at Karaoke night?:

I’m not singing

What two radio stations do you listen to in the car the most?

I don’t listen to the radio. I have Amazon music

Which would you rather do: wash dishes, mow the lawn, clean the bathroom, or vacuum the house?

Any of those except the dishes.

If you could hire someone to help you, would it be with cleaning, cooking, or yard work?

Yard work. I don’t trust people that much except a very few people so cleaning is out of the question. I love cooking so wouldn’t need help there usually either. Yard work is impersonal enough where I’d feel more comfortable with someone doing that.

If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Salad. Anything can be a salad if you try hard and believe in yourself

Who is your favorite author?

Anne Rice

Have you ever had a nickname? What is it?:

Not any that weren’t degrading

Do you like or dislike surprises? Why or why not?

Generally not a fan. I have anxiety and I don’t like being the center of attention.

In the evening, would you rather play a game, visit a relative, watch a movie, or read?

Any except visiting relatives.

Would you rather vacation in Hawaii or Alaska, and why?

Hawaii. The warmth and hiking would be incredible, the beaches pretty and the cold makes my body hurt.

Would you rather win the lottery or work at the perfect job? And why?

Hm. Win the lottery. It would allow me to help not just myself but others too.

Who would you want to be stranded with on a deserted island?

No one. If I’m stranded, I’m not going to make it. I don’t want someone else to go through that. I’ll just suffer alone, thanks.

If money was no object, what would you do all day?

Help people who are struggling.

If you could go back in time, what year would you travel to?

2014.

How would your friends describe you?

According to them, I’m nice but straightforward.

What are your hobbies?

I like cooking, hiking, makeup, and relaxing

What is the best gift you have been given?

Companionship in all it’s forms.

What is the worst gift you have received?

Domino’s and a pack of socks to share with my brother (we had to share both). This was from my moms second husbands mom and we had to sit and watch our then step sister open a pile of gifts. We were kids, and my mom and her second husband had been married for a few years at that point so there was zero reason for us to be treated like that.

Aside from necessities, what one thing could you not go a day without?

Hope

List two pet peeves.

-Disrespect

-Laziness

Where do you see yourself in five years?

Hopefully further along with my mental health

How many pairs of shoes do you own?

3- 1 for home, 2 for work

If you were a super-hero, what powers would you have?

I’d want to be able to financially help people

What would you do if you won the lottery?

First, before I tell ANYONE, my house is getting paid off. Ditto for all our bills. Once all that’s done, then I’ll let Frank know. From there on we decide what we want to do together

What form of public transportation do you prefer? (air, boat, train, bus, car, etc.)

Train isn’t bad, neither is bus.

What's your favorite zoo animal?

Hippos.🥰

If you could go back in time to change one thing, what would it be?

If Frank and I could go back with the knowledge we have now we wouldn’t get licensed for foster care.

If you could share a meal with any 4 individuals, living or dead, who would they be?

My husband, my best friend, Nina, and Gerard Way

How many pillows do you sleep with?

2 when I’m awake, 1 once I fall asleep

What's the longest you've gone without sleep (and why)? Like 3 days. I was having a mental breakdown and ended up in the hospital.

What's the tallest building you've been to the top in?

No idea.

Would you rather trade intelligence for looks or looks for intelligence?

Depends on the ratio between what you lose versus what you gain.

How often do you buy clothes?

As needed.

Have you ever had a secret admirer?

Of course not

What's your favorite holiday?

Definitely Christmas

What's the most daring thing you've ever done?

I fought continuously for ownership of myself in a house where I was viewed as less important than furniture because I was female. I dressed as a boy, quit bathing and became as repulsive as I could so I wouldn’t be attractive to the men or women in my moms lifestyle.

What was the last thing you recorded on TV?

I don’t

What was the last book you read?

Working on a new one.

What's your favorite type of foreign food?

Love Asian foods I’ve tried

Are you a clean or messy person?

Messy, I guess.

Who would you want to play you in a movie of your life?

No one. I wouldn’t want people to see what I went through.

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?

About a half hour

What kitchen appliance do you use every day?

The Keurig

What's your favorite fast food chain?

I don’t like most of them, tbh. Maybe Subway?

What's your favorite family recipe?

My moms bread recipe

Do you love or hate rollercoasters?

As long as they’re not super tall I don’t mind them

What's your favorite family tradition?

The Christmas Poinsettia

What is your favorite childhood memory?

Probably meeting my best friend.

What's your favorite movie?

The nightmare before Christmas

How old were you when you learned Santa wasn't real? How did you find out?

I don’t remember.

Is your glass half full or half empty?

I’m just glad it has something to drink

What's the craziest thing you’ve done in the name of love?

I got married.

What three items would you take with you on a deserted island?

Food, water, and a boat to get me home.

What was your favorite subject in school?

Band.

What's the most unusual thing you've ever eaten?

Pets

Do you collect anything?

Dishes.

Is there anything you wished would come back into fashion?

Comfortable clothes. I’m going to wear them regardless but it would be nice to have a bigger selection to choose from

Are you an introvert or an extrovert?

Absolutely an introvert.

Which of the five senses would you say is your strongest?

Touch

Have you ever had a surprise party? (that was an actual surprise)

No and I’m fine with that.

Are you related or distantly related to anyone famous?

Not that I’m aware of.

What do you do to keep fit?

Lol.

Does your family have a “motto” – spoken or unspoken?

Nope.

If you were ruler of your own country what would be the first law you would introduce?

Baseline living guarantees

Who was your favorite teacher in school and why?

I didn’t really have a teacher I was close to.

What three things do you think of the most each day?

My family, my job, and my obligations

If you had a warning label, what would yours say?

Warning: Avoid asking questions you don’t want an honest answer for. All attempts at niceness will be tried but there is no guarantee of satisfaction.

What song would you say best sums you up?

I have no idea. There are many who describe parts of me but not one I can think of that describes me as a whole.

What celebrity would you like to meet at Starbucks for a cup of coffee?

Weird Al. He seems like a pretty chill guy who wouldn’t mind chatting with an average person.

What's the most interesting thing you can see out of your office or kitchen window?

My lilacs.

On a scale of 1-10 how funny would you say you are?

Like a 2

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Hopefully much further along with my mental health

What was your first job?

Picking pine cones out of this ladies yard.

If you could join any past or current music group which would you want to join?

None.

How many languages do you speak?

English and a lot of American Sign Language

Who is the most intelligent person you know?

My husband

If you had to describe yourself as an animal, which one would it be?

Probably a bear. I’m not super social, enjoy sleeping through the winter as much as possible, am selective in my social obligations,enjoy fish and berries, avoid people if possible

What is one thing you will never do again?

Drive a semi.

0 notes

supernoondles · 4 years ago

Text

2020

A lot happens in a year, even when nothing seems to happen at all.

There's nothing new my commentary about a global pandemic (and the particularly frustrating experience of living in America during it, even with all my privileges of continued employment, owning a car, rent stability, and living in the bay area) will bring to the reader, but I will underscore this: my feelings aren't that 2020 is any kind of exceptional year, but the point where, hopefully, we finally realize that economic/climate/racial injustice has been a terrible problem for a long time, and will continue to be unless we enact massive collective change. A vaccine is not going to make any of those issues disappear, and I worry the people in power (including myself) will return to their comfortable life styles as if the next decade won't be even worse.

Anyway, general DOOM aside (RIP man), here's my year in specific!

From looking through my photos: January was off to a great start. I celebrated the new year with dim sum with J/M/M, as per tradition, and went on a foggy hike through SF with my family that involved my dad and J getting hilariously lost. Soon after I went to Sonoma with J/M -- for all my years in the bay, I had never explored north of the Golden Gate that much -- which was a wonderful trip seeing J's hometown. I helped my lab demo research at the Exploratorium, started growing my own microgreens, and went on more (to become semi-regular and my only source of cardio through the pandemic) bike rides with my lab mates. I finally saw Hamilton (though feel a need to justify here how "cringey" I think LMM is). I went to Genesis, my first gaming-related convention, and it was a lot of fun despite seeing no women. I did so many things, was making progress on research (I think? I don't recall any breakdowns) and my mental health was generally good.

The doing of things continued in February. After not going last year, I went to the Tet Festival in SJ (which was kind of sad). I joined a Chinese learning club and a crafts club and had a delicious omakase. N visited again, I went ice skating and tried to rescue a giant rat from string lights, and saw the Sonic movie in theaters (which would have been my last movie in theaters, sigh). After having a drink at Wursthall with T, I felt terrible (to the unaccustomed reader, not only do I Asian glow, my hands/feet itch whenever I drink and I feel like I want to die), and decided that was the last drink I'd ever have -- thanks to the pandemic that's stayed true. I went on a ski retreat with the lab that felt particularly special (and not just because I didn't have to pay). We (I, in convincing my mostly Asian office) wanted to make 元宵 on the eve of E's birthday, but it turns out that a bunch of CS PhD students really love singing karaoke for like 4 hours straight into the night, and at some point I was like, okay y'all, time to go to bed. So I hosted 元宵 making at my apartment the next weekend, and we watched another Bong Joon-Ho movie (The Host) to celebrate his Oscar win. Typing this out, it seems wild that this was even in this year. I also did sh*** for the first time, hallucinated white woman in the edges of my vision like a GAN, ate a lot of shaved parmesan from TJ, and let go of any stress I had about the UIST deadline to the abundance of nature and the world.

I break from the month-per-paragraph format now because we all know what happens next. M and I biked around campus to film a virtual tour for the newly virtual admit weekend. Being in Gates that Friday (three days before the bay area wide shelter-in-place order) was the last time I'd be on campus for a while. The next day I adopted 3 wonderful baby rats (my biggest brain move this whole year) and the day after that I moved home. I was counting down the days until Animal Crossing and then J and I were duplicating royal crowns in ACNH. At some point my hair got really bad. The months blurred together. Adjusting to WFH was extremely challenging for me, someone who had structured their whole life around the "I only do work in the office and I leave the office when I get hungry for dinner" logic. I would stop working at 6pm but spent the entire afternoon mentally prepping myself to do maybe 30 menial minutes of it. I binged AtLA. I gave up submitting to UIST. In May I hung out in the park with J, who came home from Seattle, which was the first time I saw anyone outside my family. Sometime in there I decided to become a Twitch streamer and had a brief revival as DJ Noon before I felt bad for roping my friends into listening to my music and ran out of interesting songs I wanted to play. In June I, like many others, took to the streets. For two weeks I donated $50 a day to a different organization. I couldn't get any work done at all and spent an entire advisor meeting sobbing so intensely that they felt bad and canceled it after 10 minutes. I emailed the university and got my housing back for the summer and I moved back to start my internship.

The internship was the break I needed -- working with W was a godsend compared to the struggle of my advisors. After reaching new lows at the start of the summer, my mental health was sloping positively again -- working on a new research project helped clear the emotional baggage of the last one. I was also getting more outdoor social interaction -- I went to Ocean Beach with M/D, Half Moon Bay with my family, and going on weekly bike rides with M. At the end of June, M, my roommate, her boyfriend M the clown (there are now 3 different Ms) and I waited for negative COVID results before going on a 2 day camping trip to Mt. Lassen, which felt completely surreal, and, at that time, completely necessary.

The summer dragged on and my mental health, at some point, began to slip. If I were to graph it it would probably look like the inverse of COVID cases in the US -- gradually decreasing, but with high variance from the day to day. I got an embroidery machine, I attended a workshop on docu-poetics with CPH that was so ripe with information my brain physically ached, I saw my lab mates again for the first time as we sat in a very, very wide circle to say goodbye to a post-doc who got a faculty job in Israel. Most weekends I drove to my parents' house and would take J on various hikes around East Bay so he could better appreciate his roots before he went off to Boston for college. He was taking the Switch with him, so in August I bought myself a new one and planned out my entire second ACNH town, which kept me busy for a while -- but surprisingly not as long as I thought, as with planning (and money from my old account) the whole project took I think less than 50 hours. The camping itch came back and the day before my birthday, which was also the day before J would leave for Boston, we went camping at a small state park in San Jose where he got heat stroke and we slept on top of fire ants. The entire experience reminded me how much I disliked camping -- but what else was there to do? I had a wonderful (and long, bless the folks who stayed) Zoom birthday party where I wore a mesh shirt I made and covered with worms on a string. The day after my birthday someone backed into my car, which, following the demands of a racist letter from the HOA, was parked in guest parking. (Ultimately this would be a blessing of insurance money, as the damage was mainly cosmetic and the person kindly left their contact information.) At this time I was also unironically watching ASMR videos to fall asleep, so I painted a two Bob Ross style paintings, one in my virtual art club, to pay homage.

Fire season this year was worse than it's ever been. Being trapped inside the house combined with my roommate moving out at the start of fall quarter and now living alone marked the second downward spiral of my mental health. The bad days were more frequent. I TA'd a game design course, my first time teaching at this university, where many students messaged me to complain that their 95s were not 100s. In the end the lowest grade in the class was an A- and 20% of the class got an A+. At some point I submitted a summer-long project I did with J and S to CHI; it is so much easier to produce work when I do not have to wrangle with M. (This paper gets accepted, but my silly grad student excitement is tampered both by general "why are we still trying to publish when society is crumbling" pandemic feelings and the fact that CHI will not be physically in Japan next year.) Maybe once a month I go birding. I feel increasingly as if there is nothing novel in my life; I am tired of it all and my body feels fatigued even though I don't do anything with my days. Some days it feels like if I don't touch someone I will explode. My use of recreational marijuana skyrockets. I start doing exercise videos semi-regularly with A. I briefly consider moving to Seattle with E, who is about to defend, before it's clear we have, as always, different boundaries and expectations. I look for places in Sunset/Richmond with M to little success.

In October I somehow pull it together and organize student volunteers for a 3 day conference that requires waking up before 5am every day. I do nothing the rest of the week. After we get flu shots and I let someone into my apartment for the first time since the pandemic started, I help E move up to Seattle. The trip is comfortable and we get to take care of each other; this fulfills a need in me. On Halloween J and I dance in a soccer field next to a combination anarchist recruitment center and homeless encampment -- now cleared by the cops -- and eat a mud pie that is too sweet. On my last day in WA I ask E if he would like to have sex, as friends, and he politely declines. I am pleased with how easily I emotionally accept this answer, how through time and therapy I've finally come to cherish our friendship without always looking for what could have been. I am extremely nervous on the flight home, and it's the first and only flight I will take during the pandemic, and the N-95 squishes my face so my head looks like a balloon, but I have the privilege of free 5 minute weekly tests through the university and I collect another negative result.

In November I fully embrace the hyperfixation lifestyle. My brain, always looking for novel stimuli, has given up on doing work entirely and instead thinks of Thanzag constantly. There is one day where I play Hades for 8 hours and I feel gross, as if I've completed my regression to my high school self. It takes 90 hours until I achieve all my goals, and with no more runs necessary to roll for RNG-based conversational triggers, I finally feel a sense of freedom. (My Switch tells me I have used it for 580+ hours this year, which is more than double last year.) The second SwSh DLC is a struggle for me to complete as I do not find catching legendaries enticing. J comes back early from university at my urging to avoid the travel surge, a week before Thanksgiving, and starts living with me. This helps a lot. My next hyperfixations come overlapping and staggered: I write 25k words of a second iteration of my 2015 NaNoWriMo with the protagonist I had developed in high school before I get bored with the story and realize I need yet another iteration; I buy a combination air fryer pressure cooker and ask my parents for a functional vacuum and bidet as early Christmas gifts and become obsessed with immaculate inside living spaces. This carries on to re-decorating my room at my parents' house, after installing a shelf in the closet and a curtain to close it off from the living room, and spending roughly 30 hours over December break organizing and cleaning their entire garage--they have not thrown out a single piece of paper or article of clothing since they set foot in this country over 20 years ago. My therapist quits the practice and my relationship with my advisors improve. I watch a few housewife vlogs and make my own. I have the revelation that doing research in a pandemic is basically just like any other creative project -- no one really cares that much if I get it done, it's just harder to do than, say, putting together a vlog in a few hours. This shift in mindset feels life changing to me, having before thought of research more as work, a taboo thing to pursue in a pandemic, and when W compliments me for the progress I've made in both the system and managing our meeting with M I do not know how to respond because no one has ever done that before. In the last two weeks of the year I start tracking my time. In our last session (that I almost sleep through), my therapist tells me that I seem stable to her and she is not worried about me. I believe her.

In 2020 I made a marked point to let everyone know that I didn't have goals. It felt lofty to have personal ambitions in the face of everything at a global scale. With this said I will now revisit the 2020 resolutions I wrote last year: (1) Intentionally seek out love: absolutely not, (2) Do enough work such that I don't feel guilty: also no, (3) sew one thing a month: no, but in the end I sewed 11 things total this year so I was close, (4) improve my Chinese: this was actually the only thing that did happen, and now my mom and I have better conversations because of it and I'm so thankful.

In 2021, however, I feel like I finally have it in me to have goals again. They are simple. (1) Get laid. (2) Submit the two research projects I've been doing forever. (3) Commit to writing down my thoughts that make me think, "Oh, that's interesting, I should write it down." Ideas are unfortunately such currency in what I do.

Last year I wrapped up this post with some candid, but embarrassing, optimism. I will offer no such high hopes for 2021, but I do ask the reader if they have noticed that I switched tenses from past to present halfway through this post. And that's 2021: an incidentally unintentional, but then consciously controllable, shift to the present.

#noon's shitty end of the year summary posts #my last post on this blog was my 2019 post lmao

6 notes · View notes

roadtrip-2020 · 4 years ago

Text

Telluride, CO.

Telluride has been on my bucket list for some time now, and I am very happy to report that it did not disappoint! In fact, we loved it so much that we extended our stay, and even explored other towns recommended to us in the surrounding area: Ridgway and Ouray. I’ll write about these in a separate post. :)

Where we stayed

The New Sheridan Hotel - The New Sheridan was great because it’s in the perfect location -- right on the main street in the center of everything. We also loved eating brunch at the restaurant and getting drinks at the rooftop bar. The rooftop bar was very popular when we were there and so I’d recommend getting there early and putting your name down. The room we had was small but comfy and had a nice, big bathroom. The staff even washed a bag of our laundry for us, which was so nice and much needed after camping for 8 nights.

What we loved:

Location

Restaurant and bar

Staff was super helpful

What we didn’t love:

Room was small and dark

Kind of pricey for what it was IMO

Me @ brunch at the New Sheridan:

Dunton Town House - Worth the extra splurge!! We LOVED Dunton Town House. Dunton Hot Springs is another longtime bucket list item for me, but it’s an hour or two outside of Telluride, very expensive, and they were all booked when we were in Colorado. We stopped by Dunton Town House while we were staying at The New Sheridan just to see if there was any chance they had a room available. They did!! And it was the best room of the house, Hirsch.

Dunton Town House is essentially a luxury bed & breakfast. The rooms are super cute and comfy, and ours had a little porch area and beautiful mountain views. All the bath products are Aesop, which is a very nice luxury touch. Breakfast is included and SO good. They get pastries from a local bakery, have fresh yogurt, granola, and fruit, and bagels with lox, tomatoes, etc. They even have gourmet cheese and meats for a more European-style breakfast. YUM! They have a host onsite at all times that can help with anything, and all the snacks and drinks (including beer, wine, and alcohol) are available for free.

What we loved:

Our room - beautiful design, super comfy, big bathroom, and mountain views

Staff was so friendly and helpful

Breakfast was so tasty!

Booze and snacks for free

They have cold Dunton branded water bottles filled with water available at all times

What we didn’t love:

The only bummer was that there is only a small common living area to hang out in outside of your room. It’s like an attic or living room and has a TV, board games, books, and a full bar. The one time we tried to hang out there was to watch the Vice Presidential debates (no TVs in rooms), but there was another couple there so we left.

What we did

We were pretty excited to be in a cute town again, so the first two days we were there we mostly shopped, ate good food, and explored. We took the gondola to the mountain village, which was fun and beautiful views, but the mountain village itself looks like most ski villages. Downtown Telluride has much more to offer.

Our second two days in Telluride, we hiked Bear Creek Trail and got massages at Pure Beauty & Wellness Spa downtown.

We also really enjoyed going into the galleries along the main street. I don’t remember any of the names, but we found a lot of cool pieces!!

Recommendations

Restaurants:

The National - The was one of my favorite meals of the trip! A trendy contemporary American restaurant with delicious food and really amazing craft cocktails.

221 South Oak - This was our other favorite meal in Telluride. I believe the head chef is from Top Chef and is known for her vegetarian dishes. We went the other direction and had the Elk steak and Bison Short Ribs...haha

There - Trendy, Asian-fusion small plates. We loved the spicy duck buns, crispy chicken lettuce wraps, and the wagyu skewers.

Smuggler Union Brewery - We came here our first night because we didn’t have a reservation or plan and wanted something good, but casual. We were very pleasantly surprised, the food was pretty good for a brewery! The music and general vibes were on point, so we definitely will go back.

Hikes:

Bear Creek Trail - This was a stunning, moderate ~5 mile hike that leads to Bridal Veil Falls. The trailhead is right by the gondola in town, so we didn’t even need to get in a car. This was absolutely perfect when we were there in mid-October with the leaves turning (pics below).

Shopping:

Crossbow Leather - By far my favorite store in Telluride! Really cool handmade leather goods and women’s accessories. Amazing hats, belts, bags, and jewelry.

Spa:

Pure Beauty & Wellness Spa - We got massages here and they were great! They also have a Salt Cave which sounded cool but was an extra cost, of course.

Also highly recommend taking the gondola to Mountain Village! Beautiful views, especially in the fall!

#telluride #colorado #san juan mountains #travel #road trip

0 notes

wallerthomas79-blog · 5 years ago

Text

DESIGN STRATEGIES AND MOTIVATION

Connecting/Synthesizing/Transforming

The research conducted this month was to discover what research and strategies are needed to produce a design strategy that will sell the benefits and features of a client's product to the intended consumer. These features and benefits must differentiate themselves from the competition, failure to differentiate, will only produce a design strategy that is too broad and will get lost in the crowd of similar strategies. Vlad Margulis says that design strategy is a part of the product strategy and that it focuses on the consumer, what their goals, needs, and pain points are (Margulis, para 7). To develop a design strategy, chapter one of George Felton's book talks about three parts needed for a good strategy. The product, consumer, and the marketplace are the three main parts, and address questions like, Does the product solve a specific problem? Who is the consumer? What is your target audience, and why? How does the product or brand fit into the marketplace, and who is your competition? Answering these questions can help lay the foundation for a successful design strategy.

A designer also needs to know everything about the client, the product, consumer, and the competition. Research is an integral part of a design strategy. Marketers can use demographics and psychographics to help determine who their target audience is, and what needs their product will solve for the consumer. Demographics is research that represents the physical attributes of the target consumer. Like their gender, location, and employment, whereas the psychographics represents the attitudes and opinions of the target consumer. Felton explains it best by saying that demographics represent the outside of a person, and psychographics represents the inside of a person (Felton, p.34).

When the designer knows the client, its product, and who the consumer is. Then two strategic approaches may be used to sell the product to the targeted consumer. The Product-Oriented approach focuses on selling the benefits and features of a product to the consumer by Generic Claim, Positioning, Unique Selling Proposition, and Product Features. This strategy targets the consumer's rational needs. George Felton suggests that the product-oriented approach is better suited for established brands that have a good piece of the market (Felton, p. 46).

The other approach is the Consumer-Oriented approach, which focuses on the emotional needs of the consumer. This strategy is also used to establish a brand's image, voice, and messaging. David Ogilvy says, "Image means personality. Products, like people, have personalities, and they can make or break them in the market place" (Felton, 2013). Using the consumer-oriented strategic approach will help a brand differentiate from the competition and help sell their brand's voice, messaging, and personality to the target consumer. Brand Image, Life Style, and Attitude are all strategies that target the consumer's emotional needs rather than their rationale needs.

Once a designer knows the in's and out's of the product, consumer, and the marketplace. The designer can use all this information to develop a creative brief. The creative brief needs to be precise and focused on the benefits and features that are going to be advertised to the target consumer. The designer wants to focus on the features and benefits that will differentiate the product from its competition. Being too broad or trying to sell to everyone rather than a focused target consumer will fail to differentiate from its competitors.

BoxPark Sushi: Creative Brief

Client Name: BoxPark Sushi

Business Type: Restaurant

What benefits are being promised? Relaxed dining experience.

To whom is it being promised? Men and Women ages 20-45 who enjoy eating sushi relaxed environment.

Why should they believe you? BoxPark Sushi is located in the Box Park mall, which has a modern and casual vibe and atmosphere.

Expanded Categories

Key Insight: Eating sushi in a relaxed casual environment.

Advertising Problem: Newly established restaurant needs to communicate to target consumer that they are open for business and offer a new way to experience sushi.

Advertising Objective: Get more customers in the doors and enjoying sushi.

Target Consumer: Men and Women, 20 to 35 who are sushi lovers.

Competition: Kyoto, Screaming Tuna, and Rice N Roll Bistro

Key Consumer Benefit: Fresh, High-Quality Sushi in a fun and relaxed environment.

Support: Restaurant is in the Box Park mall where it is supported by other modern and creative businesses.

Good Enemy Model

Up Against: Target customers not knowing about BoxPark Sushi.

Stands for: High-quality sushi in a modern and fun atmosphere.

Expression: Modern, creative restaurant.

Demographics

Gender: Male/Female

Age: 20-45 (Average age for East Side is 39)

Location: East Side Milwaukee

Mobility: Car, Public transportation, Uber, Walk or Bike

Income: Average income is $56K

Expenditures: Spends money, likes to dine out and socialize.

Occupation: White-collar workers and College students

Education: Students or graduates with 2 or 4-year degrees

Nationality: Caucasian and Asian

Religion: NA

Marital Status: Single/Dating

Family Status: Single

Psychographics

Attitudes: Generally positive attitude, loves life and works hard to achieve goals.

Opinions: Stays true to what they believe or think, but also values and respects the opinion of others.

Habits: Loves the outdoors and traveling. Seeks new adventures and exercises regularly.

Personality: Kind personality, and gets along with others. Enjoys meeting new people and socializing.

Lifestyle: Enjoys the outdoors and modern conveniences. Eats relatively healthy but not a health nut. Enjoys having a good time with friends and family.

Hobbies: Loves to travel, and doing outdoor activities like hiking, mountain biking, and fishing.

Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs

What is the highest level possible achieved? Physiological Need

Through what features (or features)? Relaxed Environment

Settle & Alreck’s Shopping List of Needs

What need (or needs) is being met? Consistency Need, Nurturance Need, and Affiliation Need.

Through what feature or (features)? High-quality Sushi, Relaxed Environment

Product-Oriented Strategies

Generic Claim: Fresh, high-quality sushi in a relaxed atmosphere.

Product Features: High-quality sushi, fresh, great customer service.

USP: Located in the modern and creative BoxPark Mall.

Positioning: A modern and relaxed approach to sushi dining. Customer-Oriented Strategies

Brand Image (Personality Traits): Modern, Fresh, Relaxed

Lifestyle: Adventurous, Creative

Attitude: Confident, Fun

Inspiration Examples:

Fig.1 (El Luchador Interior Design by hcreates)

This image is an example of a possible restaurant layout and tactile materials used.

Fig.2 (Designer Hannah Churchill, Photographer Seth Powers)

This image is the inspiration for not only the layout of the restaurant space but also the bright lighting and relaxed atmosphere it produces. Based on research conducted, a lot of sushi restaurants have a dim lighting setup which sets the mood. By brightening up space, a more relaxed and open dining experience can be delivered.

Fig.3 Image Retrieved from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/672654894325635273/

This image is an example of the type of industrial styling of the BoxPark Sushi interior.

Fig.4 Designed by Lazaro Rosa Violan

Another example of how the look and feel of the BoxPark Sushi restaurant can provide a possible relaxed and casual dining experience.

Problem Solving

This month the problem that needed to be solved was which benefits and features were going to be sold to the targeted consumer for BoxPark Sushi restaurant. This was more difficult than expected and required a lot more creative thinking. Looking at the concepts and strategies in the learning, made sense and seemed like a pretty easy task. That was not the case when the designer is actually doing the research and work trying to find benefits and features that will truly differentiate themselves from the competition. The first attempt at the Creative Brief assignment was a failure on the designer's part. The benefits and features listed in the brief were way too broad and did not claim benefits or features that the competition could not claim themselves. More thought and creativity will need to be conducted to truly find the differentiating factors that will set BoxPark Sushi apart from the competition. The creative brief has been slightly adjusted to focus on the benefit and feature of “A Relaxed Dining Experience”. Typically Sushi restaurants interior spaces have a moodier lighting setup, which gives the appearance of a fancy atmosphere. To help with the “relaxing atmosphere” the restaurant will adopt a more open space with more brighter lighting setup. We want the customers who come to BoxPark Sushi to feel relaxed and not feel that they have to dress up or only eat sushi on special occasions.

Innovative Thinking

There was a lack of innovative thinking this month, and the work produced this month was not up to par against other designers in the industry. More work done on the research side is needed to narrow the features and benefits to something that can be offered to the target consumer that BoxPark Sushi competitors do not offer or can not claim. The concept of “A relaxing dining experience” may still be too broad and more research and creative thinking will need to be conducted to find a design strategy that will set BoxPark Sushi apart from the competition.

Acquiring Competencies

This month the competencies that were acquired were concepts of design strategies that if used together can help produce a design strategy that will differentiate the client's features and benefits from the competitions. The most important thing for a designer to know is the product, consumer and the marketplace. Without knowing these inside and out, a designer will not be successful in developing the appropriate strategy. Once the product, consumer and market place is known and research is done (demographics and psychographics) then the appropriate strategy to use should be more clear. A product-oriented approach or a consumer-oriented approach can be used, but these approaches do not necessarily have to be used or parts of each approach can be used. It all depends on what benefits and features of the product is being sold. All the learning acquired this month would fall into the Conceptual and Occupational competency categories.

Reflection

Overall this month has been great. This month has furthered the knowledge learned from past months and showed how these concepts could work together to create a design strategy that can differentiate the benefits and features of a product from the competition. Based on the knowledge and learning objectives, there has been a discovery that the concepts learned are kind of like individual steps in the design process. Coming up with a design strategy that has differentiating factors can be a hard task. The first step would be to research and understand the client, product, consumer, and competition. The second step would be to know what problem is the product truly solving for the consumer. Once a designer knows this information, then the next step for the designer will be the discovery of the product's benefits and features and what basic and higher level of needs are being solved. The designer can then decide which design approach would be better to communicate with the target consumer. Will it be a product-oriented approach or a consumer-oriented approach. Then the designer can further look into the buying behaviors of the target consumer and discover what will help differentiate the benefits and features of the client's product or service. The buying behaviors seem to be the extra detail needed to drive home the differentiating factor. Based on the knowledge gained this month, this is the overall design strategy process and order that these concepts are applied. There are probably multiple approaches to use these concepts at different stages in the design strategy process. Still, the order of the concepts and strategies listed above seem to be the most logical approach based on a subjective opinion.

The understanding of these concepts can be easier than the task itself. Finding a feature and benefit for BoxPark Sushi that differentiates them from the competition was harder than first expected. More research is needed, and the scope of the design strategy presented this month was too broad and needed to be narrowed down. Narrowing the features and benefits down to just one main benefit can help the designer discover a differentiating factor that will help sell the client's product to the targeted consumer. More research on BoxPark Sushi's competitors will also need to be conducted to find out what similarities they possess other than the most obvious ones. Continuing this project in the next few classes will be exciting. It will be interesting to see the process of this project go from a not so good creative brief to a more narrowed down creative brief that has a feature or benefit that does offer something different than the competition.

Felton G. (2013) Advertising Concept and Copy 3rd Edition [Online Book] Retrieved from Vital Bookshelf

Jonathan E. Fig.4 (2019) Lazaro Violan [Online Image] Retrieved from https://www.pinterest.com/IndustrialDecorMagazine/

Margulis V. (2017, March 22) Product Strategy Vs. Design Strategy [Online Article] Retrieved from https://medium.com/@vladmargulis/product-strategy-vs-design-strategy-95bb25724bbb

Natalie S. Fig.1 (2019, July 12) El Luchador Interior Design by hcreates [Online Image] Retrieved from https://gritsandgrids.com/2018/07/el-luchador-interior-design-by-hcreates/

Fig.3 (2019) Trendy kitchen design restaurants industrial ideas [Online Image] Retrieved from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/672654894325635273/

Tereza, Fig. 2 (2018) A Tour of The Hook Restaurant in Shanghai [Online Image] Retrieved from https://www.archlovin.com/2018/12/tour-hook-restaurant-shanghai/

0 notes

peedeelove · 5 years ago

Text

how do I journey so much how do I earn cash what do I do Who am I how I make my movies what equipment do i use the place am I going subsequent so if you are fascinated by any of those questions keep tuned so i am gonna divide this video in four sections first one would be Who am I what's my story the way it began journeying 2d one can be after quitting my job how am I sustaining my travels how i am funding my travels how do I earn money third one could be how do I make videos what equipment do i exploit what software do i use to edit videos and the last one could be where am I going next so i'll put the timestamps somewhere over here and you could if you're interested by some specified matters which you could just soar to that point stamp otherwise maintain looking at k so opening with my introduction so my identify is Devon and 29 years historical I was born in this small metropolis of Kapurthala in Punjab and that i did my schooling the whole lot from right here I used to be I was once really just right at reports so I had best two choices either to turn out to be an engineer or a medical professional so I selected the engineering I graduated from topper tuition in Patiala and even there I used to be like you realize studious style of I was once among the toppers like the the factor i'm looking to make is that you understand all my lifestyles I was you already know working difficult just to get a excellent job and get good money then I went to Pune spent like two months there came back to noida then I switched jobs then I went to gorga so like in whole I spent seven years working in the program industry now coming to the part like when I started journeying it was i assume in 2015 my first trick was once again in 2012 however then i did not journey anywhere I did I did go to Singapore and stuff however you understand there was once a household trip when in 2015 I began traveling like I did my first track of that yr was three owned and then I went to be billing then I did a long trek with India hikes that was Roopkund you realize that that is nonetheless my highest 16,500 toes the same yr I did a number of other treks like Kedarkantha and so in 2016 I used to be touring with my loved ones and doing avenue trips with my pals I went to Northeast Gujarat Andamans Jammu Kashmir so I did a variety of touring inside India however then it used to be 20016 2017 I met a pal of mine he did an MBA and in the exchange program he went to Europe so we did the trek collectively we walked as much as Rohtang in view that it used to be closed so like in those three days he informed me so many stories about Europe and in June I was once in Europe myself I was once there for 3 weeks and you know might be that used to be a turning factor after I you understand began taking visiting seriously after that I got here again to India I bought a drone and that i did a video here in my village then I showed it to a resort they usually invited me over for doing a video in order that was once my first professional video in 2017 and then I approached the air Astana after which I went to Kazakhstan after calex tan I obtained a mission with the Indian Navy I did a video for them so you recognize the item is that quite a few stuff used to be taking place and you realize I might see that k there is a like that there can be a probability of constructing a profession on this thing after which I made up our minds to stop my job I quit my job I served a discover of 2 months on 1st of April 2018 I was a free man I had a buddy I had a fb friend he was in Sri Lanka so he was like yeah come over i'm going to show you Sri Lanka I spent one month in Sri Lanka I got here back discovered my Russian visa I went to Russia for one month and that i went to Kazakhstan once more for one month so a lot of travelling used to be going down after which I got a few initiatives with my Indra so yeah the air was once variety of excellent like yeah I had imagined that i'm going to be touring to rather more locations many extra areas but I just did three international locations for 4 nations after quitting my job but then I was you already know I was staying there for months like I stayed in Russia for one month I stayed in Kazakhstan for one month I stayed in Sri Lanka for one month so yeah that was like a rather excellent expertise for the reason that I was not just going to a nation spending two days and coming again I used to be residing there ok now coming to the the following part which is my existence after quitting my job so I wrote for seven years in the IT enterprise I was once incomes good amount of money my lifestyles used to be sorted like I used to be I was touring I was still traveling out I traveled to Europe and that i traveled to Kazakhstan while I still had my job so travelling was once no longer an dilemma but then at any time when I had to travel I had to ask my boss boss should Timmy Legia so and and likewise like despite the fact that I even I get a leaves they'll be like two weeks three weeks at max so you already know like I went to Europe I went to six countries however I was simply there for 3 weeks like I was simply hopping from one city to the other it used to be not you realize experiencing the position so one of the motive was that 2d purpose used to be that I was no longer liking the city of Delhi given that of the entire pollution and stuff 0.33 factor I wanted to come back again to my native land spend a while with my father and mother also I was I used to be seeing likelihood of careers in video making so yeah so all of these causes got here together and that i quit my job so now after I stop my job how how do i how do I control the expenditures of my visiting where does the money come from as a way to answer that question like as I labored for seven years I had a excellent saving so when I used to be quitting the job I had this factor in my mind that ok i have this so much cash even if i don't get any venture or anything i will nonetheless travel for like you recognize one year or two years so I had that 0.33 factor in my intellect oh yeah it's coming to the part I wired money I do freelance initiatives beet pictures or making movies the object is that you already know when you are a smaller company men and women is not going to technique you you will must technique them so like I was once in Moscow I approached a travel company that you recognize I need to do videos if like i will be traveling in Russia if you need some videos i will make some movies for you and in addition they agreed they paid me good for just a few movies I made a few movies for them after which I used to be making movies for some hotels in India even as in Kazakhstan I did a video for a hostel there so the thing is that you need to be your own revenue representative you ought to be your own PR and you need to technique manufacturers like I approached the Astana I showed them my work in order that they appreciated it and that's how they subsidized my flights to Kazakhstan after which to Russia as good so like visiting as a content material creator or a blogger is like many times you get some Bart ideals that you can get a free instrument the place the journey company you have got to do a video for them cash saved is money and so that you get free tools otherwise which you can at all times promote your content material so like there was this video for Moscow I did like the drone video of Moscow it used to be on YouTube I got an e-mail from some corporation in Europe that they need my content material and that i sold my content to them so yeah it is like in India humans just steal the content find it irresistible has occurred a number of occasions however then there are some excellent folks as well as just like the large manufacturers they don't do it they always ask for your permission after which they pay you well as so you already know combining all of this in the last 12 months I made respectable cash you realize nearly the same sum of money I made in my first yr of job in 2010 but then you understand my charges are somewhat bit more than my profits like the foremost section here is that I reside with my mother and father so i don't must pay any appoint i don't must go on a spree so all that is sorted my expenses are simplest my travel bills just about this 12 months I did manipulate to you know there was once just just gap there you realize that is my earnings and that is my expenditure there's a gap and that gap where I consider reducing my savings so a number of folks think that YouTube gives you a whole lot of money but it's no longer precisely proper so like if I see my stats of the last 28 days I've bought like eighty 4 thousand views within the final 28 days and all there's sixteen bucks so so like several of this relies on where your video is being watched if it can be being watched in India and you recognize the Asian international locations the money you get is much lesser you already know as in comparison with in case your video is being watched in the us or Korea like other international locations other than the economic phase after I stop my job lifestyles is good and daily of my lifestyles is one-of-a-kind you are aware of it's no longer the identical that I must rise up at this time go to the administrative center see the same faces daily come again home sleep no it can be not like that so like I meet new humans that's the you understand that is probably the most you know valuable things that I recollect that i am meeting new persons you know i'm assembly interesting people and second thing is that when I'm home I get to spend time with my dad and mom i am i'm no longer dwelling in Delhi and they're dwelling right here so like we we we're having household time so a lot of positives yeah now coming to the part how I make my movies which gear do i use like every of my movies like i am the one one who makes a to edit set who does everything k time to show you so i have DJI maverick pro so this drone has relatively helped me to take my movies to the next degree it can be like so this comes in this pouch and if I open it I get the drone so that you just do this and yeah this is the truth ok so that is the drone i use for my aerial stuff so i am using a Nikon d50 300 for my movies and i've placed on a 35mm lens on it considering it it is a great lens then i have 10 to twenty mm Nikon after which i've a 18 to 300 this is clearly like after I'm travelling with my intra and the cars are a ways away and i have to you understand shoot from a vantage point some video or some thing so I desire a zoom lens so this is what i use then i've a GoPro Hero 5 relatively satisfactory gear like you know i have been making use of it as my essential camera for my vlogs however now I've switched over switched over to the DSLR however this this thing remains to be rather like you are able to do some some quite fascinating matters with the GoPro then that is the mic that i exploit it is a avenue micro this thing is on it to preclude the wind noise and stuff and there is this other mic that i take advantage of which is a wired mic Booya 1m and essentially the most priced thing my MacBook professional like I hold it covered at all times considering the fact that I spent some huge cash on it so that is the equipment that i take advantage of I edit all my videos everything on this computer now coming to the application that i exploit for editing videos so the program that i use is ultimate reduce professional FCP I started with iMovie but then I suggestion of upgrading it and the FCP is an effective one but then it is no longer a free application you need to purchase it in case you are new to videos that you can go with after which in a while that you may switch to FCP ok now the last a part of the video the place am I going next so i'm going to Iceland and Greenland i'm going to be in Iceland for about 9 days and then i'm going to be in Greenland for one month so I approached a travel agency in Greenland they agreed for a collaboration and i will be making movies for them i will be staying there for one month Iceland i'm doing it on my possess yeah it is love it was it can be quite steeply-priced like right now i'm booking my hotels and like now not resorts hostels and they're tremendous pricey like hostels in Iceland are a lot luxurious rather more costly than a satisfactory hotel in India.

https://go.magik.ly/ml/rosb/

#travel #travelphotography #nature #instalover

0 notes

fadingfartconnoisseur · 7 years ago

Text

AK Monthly Recap: September 2017

I started September in Minsk, eager to visit four new European countries. I finished the month in New York, recovering after a very busy six weeks of on-and-off travel. And now I’m sitting in my apartment, totally pooped and yearning to travel like crazy while savoring all the time I have at home.

Here it is — the best of September!

Destinations Visited

Minsk, Belarus

Vilnius, Lithuania

Tallinn, Estonia

St. Petersburg, Russia

Helsinki, Finland

New York, NY, USA

Favorite Destination

St. Petersburg. It far surpassed my expectations with its beauty and grandeur.

Highlights

Visiting four new countries — including one that I thought would be quite difficult. I would really love to visit 100 countries, and being at 74 now puts that goal within reach. Also, I only have one country remaining in Europe — Cyprus!

That said, the last thing I want to be is the kind of person who lands in a capital, spends a day and a half there, and yells, “Country done!” I hate that. And I know that sounds ironic considering that I only visited one city each in Belarus, Lithuania, Estonia, and Russia. That wasn’t my intention at all for Lithuania and Estonia; see “Challenges” for why. So as I move on, I’ll be making an effort to visit more when possible.

Vilnius delighted me from the start. Coming from a tricky destination like Minsk, arriving in Vilnius felt like Scandinavia — people spoke English! There was wifi! Taxi drivers didn’t rip me off! I had a door code and could walk right into my apartment rental without having to meet the owner! But beyond that, I found Vilnius to be a beautiful and artsy city, as well as a major bargain compared to Western European capitals. One highlight was dining at Grey, where they have a Lithuanian tasting menu for just 14 EUR ($16), including beer. Thanks for the recommendation, Alex!

Tallinn entranced me with its beauty. Of the three Baltic capitals, Tallinn is easily the prettiest, and it reminded me very much of Prague. Once I left the old town, it reminded me a lot more of the Nordic cities I’ve seen, which sets it apart from the other Baltic capitals. I felt like I got to know the city much better once I headed away from the tourist zone, dining on Korean food and hanging out in coffeeshops among the locals.

The Hermitage is my new favorite museum in the world. It seriously blew me away — I could not believe the sheer level of art and beauty on display. The analogy that kept coming to mind was if the French had decided to put the art of the Louvre in Versailles instead! St. Petersburg as a whole was a delight from start to finish. It’s now one of my favorite cities in Europe! I loved the grandeur and the fashionable people.

Chill time in Helsinki. One thing I love about Helsinki is that there aren’t a ton of must-see sights — it’s a place for hanging out, drinking coffee, eating Fazer chocolate, and especially SHOPPING. I didn’t do much during my final days in Helsinki — more on that below — and it was what I needed.

Lots of fun times with friends and family in New York. Not one but two sets of college friends came to see Hamilton and I met them for eats in Hell’s Kitchen afterward. One night my sister, her boyfriend, and my friend Dave, a.k.a. the blogger behind Go Backpacking, and I competed at trivia at At the Wallace, one of my local bars, and we WON! My friend Anna from The Legendary Adventures of Anna turned 30 with a bang (and lots of wigs and jello shots), and my friend Amelia hosted a clothing swap where we brought several nice items of clothing we didn’t want anymore, swapped what we wanted, and donated the rest to Housing Works.

Also, my dad came to visit New York for the weekend! He split his visit between September and October, but I’ll share the September highlights here. First we went to see Kinky Boots on Broadway, a super-fun musical with great songs and a heartwarming message. Billy Porter has returned to play his Tony Award-winning role as Lola, and I haven’t seen an actor so perfectly suited for a role since Daveed Diggs in Hamilton. He was that good.

We also spent a lot of time uptown, hanging out at our favorite bars and restaurants in Harlem, visiting the Museum of the City of New York, and did a historical food tour with Taste Harlem. The tour in particular was awesome, the chicken and waffles from Red Rooster were rapturously good, and there was a hilarious little Australian boy on the tour named James who ran off everywhere, high-fived everyone, tried to befriend cops, and kept us all in stitches.

Challenges

A lot of things went wrong on my Europe trip. I didn’t expect that, and the challenges unfortunately ended up putting a damper on what was otherwise a very nice trip.

Minsk was a tough destination, as I wrote last month, but the most difficult part of all happened on September 1. I was planning to get to Vilnius by train, and one of my readers pointed out on Facebook that I was supposed to leave Minsk by air. Some nationalities including Americans are allowed to visit visa-free if they arrive by air and stay less than five days. That was my plan. I double-checked the official US international travel resource, travel.state.gov, and it said the same thing: arrive by air, stay less than five days. Then I checked the website for the Belarus embassy in the US and it said you had to arrive AND depart by air! Eek! Talk about a major oversight on travel.state.gov!

I found a flight to Vilnius for much later that day and booked it — thankfully, it only cost $60 and Uber exists in Minsk, so I could get a ride to the airport (the airport is WAY out of town). I actually found a cafe with wifi that didn’t require an SMS (!), so I was able to summon an Uber from there.

I am so thankful to my reader for pointing that out in the nick of time. You guys really are the best readers in the world, and part of that is because you saved me from a scary experience at the Belarus-Lithuania border!

As for other mishaps, one of my flights was cancelled in Vilnius, and my tour of Lahemaa National Park in Estonia was cancelled. I was not notified by email in either case, which irked me and wasted my time. These two incidents and having to book a late flight from Minsk meant that I lost a lot of time that I intended to spend exploring Kaunas in Lithuania and Lahemaa and Tartu in Estonia. I did not want to only visit the capital and leave. That disappointed me.

Arriving in Russia was a nightmare. Just read the post for the details. Next time I visit Russia, my passport is going to be pristine.

Finally, I dealt with anxiety during the end of my trip in Finland. I sometimes get hit with waves of of anxiety, usually brought on from stress while traveling. The first time was in Chiang Mai in 2015, when I suddenly felt so overwhelmed and suddenly doing easy things felt impossible. I even felt petrified of visiting a new restaurant. My anxiety never been quite that bad since, but it surfaces from time to time.

In Helsinki, I just felt like I was being pressured in every direction. So I did nothing. I walked around, I ate, I shoppedI met with my friend Eva. That was enough to make me feel like an overachiever. It was also pouring at Biblical levels, so I didn’t feel bad about not getting good photos.

The trains in New York have been AWFUL lately. One weekend I went to Brooklyn twice within a 24-hour period and spent about seven hours in transit total. SEVEN HOURS. To the next borough over. In other news, this is why I read as much as I do…