#all the geese

[frankburn]

"Frank? How can we ever thank you?" "Oh, now, come on! Get out! Out! Get out of here you crazy-"

[shalpilot]

probably the last person you want thinking that

[theoriginallastnailinthecoffin]

We don't need a saddle, hun. 🤭🤠😉

Ryan Gosling | GQ (2023)

[the-modern-typewriter]

could you write us more vampires !!!

also u the baddestt ❤️❤️❤️

"Your kind don't look so perfect in the sun," the human said. "It feels like shining a light through a counterfeit. Seeing all the flaws. I love it. Hi~"

The vampire stared at them, eyes wide and viciously frightened and simultaneously filled with a sort of bewildered wonder at the gentle warmth washing over them. It would have been adorable if they weren't a complete and utter monster, devoid of whatever humanity they'd once had. Poor mite. They were so new, weren't they?

"Gosh, really, though." The human leaned down, pressing a kiss to the vampire's forehead. "Just look at you," they murmured. "I could just eat you up, pumpkin. Who were you when you still had a beating heart?"

The vampire's skin was so cold that it almost felt blistering. Sharp. When they were a kid, they'd once made the stupid mistake of licking a metal lamppost in winter, because they'd heard it was so cold that your tongue could get stuck. It had seemed absurd. Impossible. They'd been so sure it couldn't be true. It had taken hours for them to finally be able to move away again.

Kissing a vampire always reminded them of those hours. No matter how many times they did it, they still half expected to end up with a frozen lips, unable to pull away, except with the vampire the scant hours by a lamppost would tick over for forever until all that was left was the dark.

Infernal, gorgeous creatures. How could they not be obsessed? Of course, the other hunters didn't approve, but then. Their track record spoke for itself.

The vampire was still staring when the human moved back. Of course they were.

It was an old myth that vampires burned in the sun, but an even older misconception. Exposing a vampire to the sun only got closer to revealing the truth of them; a dead thing in a box, guttingly vulnerable. They could not move, could not speak, could use none of their devastating array of night-time gifts. In the dark, the vampire was nigh unstoppable, uncageable, unbeatable, certainly too beautiful to deny.

But oh, in the daylight...

It was why every hunter who had been there since the start knew to find the vampire's lair before the moon began to rise. To follow the butterflies to an undead grave, or to whatever more modern alternative the creatures found in the many centuries of increasing refinement that followed. Same thing, though. A vampire in a guarded mansion, hunkered down behind thick walls of sun-blocking glass, was still just a pretty dead thing in a much bigger box. The human had found them all. Seen them all. This one had curled up in the first place that felt instinctively safe like a stray cat, hadn't they? They hadn't even thought to lock themselves in from the inside.

"I know, I know." the human said ruefully. "You thought you were safe. They all do. You were oh so careful! You only ate one of the locals and it was an accident, honest, you just woke up so hungry. You couldn't help it."

They picked the knife up from where they'd set it down and traced the tip along the deceptively soft line of the vampire's mouth.

The vampire's pupils turned to pinpricks of terror.

"Still," the human said, "one local is enough for them to call me around these parts. Bad luck for you, my friend, isn't it? If you'd got turned in a city, you might have had a chance! Sorry."

The vampire, predictably, said nothing. It was the only thing the human found themselves wishing for. To be able to talk with a vampire, not just at them, because certainly it would be foolish of them to risk getting near one at any other time.

The human sighed. They trailed the knife down, dug it into the vampire's neck, where the two distinctive fang marks rested.

"The lucky thing for you, is that I need to find your maker," they said. "Can't just kill you. Or maybe that's unlucky? I suppose that depends on you. As said, most people wouldn't make something like you round these parts. They know better. So how did we get here? I'm rambling. Anyway." They watched, idly, as blood trickled down the vampire's throat. "I know you can't tell me anything, killer, but you're going to try. Flick those pretty eyes up for me twice for yes. Down for no. Okay?"

The vampire was unblinkingly still for a moment, still staring at them, face involuntarily smooth. Then their eyes flicked up twice.

The human beamed. "Good! What a good leech. Now. About the last things you remember when you were still alive...do you remember meeting a tall, dark haired man, by any chance? Voice to die for. Body to kill for. Soul made for sin, etc. etc."

The vampire's eyes flicked up twice.

"Mm, thought so, thought so. Did they give you a name?" They tried a few of the aliases the vampire had used the last few times. No dice. "Okay, moving on..."

By the time evening came dangerously close, they had everything they needed. They plunged the blade into the vampire, regretfully, and rose. They cast a glance up at the sky, calculating the minutes and the seconds, before heading home to do some research.

They were back. The bastard was back.

Less than two days later, they got a call about another fledgling vampire that needed hunting. Could they help? The curious thing was that this one had a note in its pocket when it died.

Honey, I'm home.

You coming out to play tonight?

[ckducky]

It's Bitching about Heaven hours

[theluigiguy]

EXTEND N E C K

(they saw a dog...)

[richs-pics]

Canada geese

[originalartblog]

they're experiencing issues over at the Armed Detective Agency

[boarwinds]

Sometimes cs thinks his silly goofy son was sent as punishment

[salt-n-salt]

IM ALIVE I PROMISE !! (dumps my trash out) HERE !

[mostlybirdsandphotos]

the sandhill cranes are back! I got to see some mating displays, which apparently involve tossing things in the air and hopping around (｡>ヮ< )

[moon-mirage]

Here you go, @firstdragonlady , comedic book-Hayffie (including a goose) because that's how they work best for me:

I think Haymitch would enjoy introducing his feathery friend to his feathery lady. 😂

Bonus: And for an extra dose of snarky Haymitch, I love the idea that he names his geese after some variation of Effie:

“That right there is Effily. Silly little thing. Then there’s Effina and over there is the great Ephigenia. She’s the loudest one, always making noises. I can’t get her to shut up for just five minutes.”

Effie … is not flattered. 😂🪿

[cluepoke-archive]

PSA don't feed the geese !!!

[dropitdoeeyes]

theyre in love your honor and so t4t about it

[ID: A comic 6 panel comic depicting Raphaella La Cognizi and Marius von Raum from The Mechanisms in the meme format originally by Cutbu.

Panel 1: A drawing of Raphaella and Marius stand straight that cuts off at their mid-thighs. Raphaella has a blank expression while Marius looks significantly nervous. A shaky speech bubble above him reads: “I..”

Panel 2: A closeup of Marius’ face. He’s significantly more distressed here, with an even shakier speech bubble reading “I.. I..!”

Panel 3: A shot from over Raphaella’s shoulder. She’s saying: “..J, K, L, M, N, O, P…” Marius, looking suprised, has a spiked speech bubble over him: “…!!”

Panel 4: A bust shot of Raphaella with a dead-eyed look on her face. She says: “Q, R, S, T, U, V…”

Panel 5: A bust shot of Marius. His eyes are watering, he’s blushing and has broken out into a big smile. There are hearts around him as he says: “…W, X, Y, and Z.”

Panel 6: A fullbody of both Marius and Raphaella. They’re spinning in the air while holding hands with one another. There are sparkles and flower petals surrounding them.

[shalpilot]

lucid

[basofy]

now that the @lisadigitalzine account made the announcement i'm gonna post my submissions!! this time i was given the opportunity to make the cover for the credits which was really nice :) i loved making these! pls check the rest of the zine!!