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#all that constant raising of my left arm. the muscle in the side under and behind my arm is not happy
warmgrey · 6 days
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did some spinning yesterday and today for the first time in mmm 6 months or so and ooh ouch muscle pain! havent been well enough to sit in an actual chair so i was sitting in bed which... not great ergonomically with a drop spindle. oof
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slickchickchocolatier · 5 months
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Hi hi 🤗
A heethan ask here!
Heethan's reaction to yn being insecure cause she has a babyish face and her cheeks are slightly chubby ( cause irl also am insecure about my chubby cheeks 😭)
“Baby Face.”
Im sorry it took me so long to get this out. As requested, heethan x reader with chubby cheeks. Enjoy!
Warnings: fluffiest of fluff (not really but it is fluffy), m insecurities, self esteem issues. A very subtle hint of smut breaching. Think that’s it.
“Pretty baby, what are you doing?” He raises a brow and parks the side of his body against the inner door panel. Watching you through the bathroom mirror, he stands behind with his arms crossed and observes you pinching your cheeks. He peeks from under the bill of his cap as he develops a concerning look. “Why are you messing with your face like that?”
“My cheeks are so chubby.” You sigh out in defeat. “I look like a chipmunk, they don’t make me feel attractive. I’m like a baby.”
He shifts his eyes to the ground as he remains propped against the door frame, the muscles on his forearms twitch as he tightens the overlapped cross against his chest. The bill of his hat covers his eyes entirely as he shifts his head. “Don’t say that.”
“But it’s true.”
“Hey…” he walks and closes the distance from behind, taking a piece of your hair and rubs it between his fingers. He remains there, standing behind, appearing enormously tall in contrast to your height. “You’re pretty, cute, and beautiful. I wouldn’t have you any other way.”
You appreciated his words, but it didn’t seem enough as each time you looked in the mirror, you found yourself in the harrowing reality at the amount of fat that was contained in your facial features. You wondered what could he possibly see in you? The chubbiness gave you a jolly appearance, but to see beauty within it was hard. At least for you.
“I’m gonna put on a movie, any requests?” He kisses the back of your head and walks out of the bathroom, leaving you to stand in front of the mirror lonesomely. How could he treat this so lightly? Can’t he see that this was something that affected your self-esteem? Everyday when you brushed your teeth or washed your hands, there was this constant reminder of the babyish expression that stared right back at you.
“Yyyyyyyyy/nnnnn?” He drags out your name as he awaits for a response. You delayed once more and continue to rub your face. He reappears behind your body, eyeing you down through the mirror. “Come here. Now.”
His tone was stern and you knew better than to delay any further. Your heart skips a beat as you regret your actions, realizing you had just caused him to grow irritated. “Heeseung I’m sorry-“
“Come sit down next to me.” He cuts you off and pats the bedding next to him, his eyes glued to a few magazines in his hand. You cuddle against him as he puts an arm around your shoulder. The first magazine he presents to you, was a Vogue copy published in the mid 1980’s. “What’s this for?” You asked him confused.
“These are some magazines that Vicky and my other exes left behind in my car and room. I’ve meant to the throw them away but always forgot to.” He thumbs through the pages and pauses on the centerfold before handing it to you. “Maybe it’s good that I didn’t, because these are going to help me in teaching you a valued lesson.”
You focus in on the center spread and see a supermodel donning a slick black dress with a large hat. Her face looked hollow as the height of her cheekbones stand prominent and sharp. She was beautiful with her naturally contoured and defined features. “She’s pretty.”
“Yeah, she is. All of them in that era were. Girls like her were sought out for having those features, they were considered the most desirable women on the planet.”
Great. This was no help. You just told him about how you were insecure about your cheeks and here he is, showing you women that have the most desired features, a complete contrast from how you’re built. Before you could issue a response in dismay, he hands you a different Vogue edition from the early 2000’s.
You flip through the pages and settle on a photo of a different model, one that had a smaller face, slightly contoured but nowhere near as sharp or defined as the last one. She had short platinum blonde hair, and even had random piercings on her face with thin, high brows.
“She’s not as pretty as the other model but she still has a better face than me.”
He chuckles as he pulls you by your chin and rests you against his chest. “Listen. This model was the ‘it-girl’ twenty years ago. Everyone wanted to be her.”
He takes the third magazine and shows you a random page of another girl. The magazine was also Vogue, published just months ago. The pages featured a myriad of idols of K-pop, all containing a similar feature of an extremely youthful appearance and full cheeks, similar to yours.
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Some had less, while some had more, either way, you felt somewhat comforted as he spoke.
“Look familiar?” He chuckles, the bobbing of his chest matched your small giggles. “These are considered rhetorical most popular and beautiful women of the world. Girls want to look like them, and men want to be with them.”
Your eyes drift down as you started to piece together the message he was relaying. “Point is pretty, beauty within features change every decade…might even be every year. One day, people want to look like Angelina Jolie, and the next, they want to look like Jennie or Lalisa.”
You nod your head as you sink into his body. He leans back against the headboard and brings you down with him. “As far as I’m concerned, you’ll always be in style and the most desirable. I’ll never get tired of looking into your pretty eyes, playing with your sexy hair, touching your soft skin, and best of all—staring at your adorable baby face.”
Immediately following his words, he smacks a prolonged kiss against the bubbled fat of your right cheek. “Mmmmmmmuah! My baby face! God, what I wouldn’t do to show just how much I adore you.”
He really didn’t have to do much to show you. From the moment he laid eyes on you, he did everything to let you know just how much he loved and yearned for you. Even though you may not be entirely too fond of your cheeks, or whatever it is that bugs you about yourself, at the end of the day it really didn’t matter. You are a winner. You win because you had a man who truly treasured and keeps you all to himself; who prefers you without loads of makeup, and likes to see you with nothing on at all versus fully clothed. He loves you the way you are.
“You gonna use that baby face and show me how much you love me?” His voice creeps into your ear in a deep tone as you hear and watch his hand unzips his jeans. You chuckle.
“Yes. I think I can do that for you.”
💜
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sugarsnappeases · 3 months
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microfic - lesbian lilypad | 1.5k words | sexual content but not tooo explicit
HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIA @themuseoftheviolets !!!!!!!!!!! some office rivalry lesbians for your special day i love you so so much and hope you enjoy <333
“What the fuck,” Lily says as she turns the corner and sees Sirius by the printer, sitting on the little table, shoulders against the wall and legs swinging as she watches the paper slide out of the machine.
She looks over when Lily speaks, raising an eyebrow, trying and failing to hide her smirk, which only really serves to incense Lily more.
“What did you do to my print job?” she scowls, moving closer, hands on her hips, standing a few steps away from Sirius, looking down at where she’s sitting.
“What print job?” Sirius replies, in that constant, infuriating, cavalier tone, like she hasn’t a care in the world.
“My print job,” Lily repeats herself, frustrated, then elaborates, “The one that was printing from this printer two minutes ago when I left to get my stapler.”
She brandishes said stapler for emphasis, waving it in Sirius’ face as if she wouldn’t have already seen it in her hand.
“Oh?” Sirius says, lifting her arms to rest behind her head, looking for all the world like she could be reclining on a beach deckchair, rather than a wobbly little table in their office.
The muscles in her arms shift under the fabric of her white shirt as she moves. She’s wearing one of her shirts with the ridiculously frilly collars and cuffs which Lily thinks only Sirius could actually pull off. Not that she would ever tell Sirius that. The way her arms look in this new position makes Lily’s mouth a little dry. Not that she would ever tell Sirius that.
Lily looks back at Sirius’ face, frowns at the cocky little smile she’s now sporting, and huffs, “Well?”
“Well, what?” Sirius smiles wider.
She takes a step closer so as to properly tower over her, “Well, what did you do to my print job?”
Sirius shrugs, nonchalant, a façade of innocence that wouldn’t fool a toddler, “I’m not sure what you’re asking me”
“You’re not sure what I’m asking you.” Lily is unimpressed, pressing the heel of the hand holding the stapler against her forehead. She wonders whether it might be appropriate to punch a staple into her own head and then blame it on Sirius. Maybe that would get her fired, or at least out of the running for this stupid promotion.
“That’s what I said,” Sirius says, slowly, like Lily’s an idiot.
Lily is not an idiot. Lily is incredibly frustrated.
“I’m asking you what you’ve done with my fucking print job!” She raises her voice a little, gesturing sharply towards the printer and its distinct lack of her eighty-three page report on the company’s financial projections.
Sirius raises an eyebrow again, still infuriatingly aloof, unruffled, something a little mocking in the tilt of her lips as she says, “Was it anything important?”
Lily scowls, because yes, it was something important. And Sirius knew it was something important and that was why she had done something to it. She isn’t quite sure what Sirius has done but she’s going to find out and she’s going to get her report back and she’s going to get the promotion and that’s that.
“It was more important than whatever you’re printing,” Lily replies, crossing her arms in front of her chest.
Sirius laughs, “Is that so?”
She taps the stapler impatiently against her side as she nods, because obviously that’s so.
“So, you think your financial projections are more impo-”
Lily interrupts then, shoving a vindicated finger in her face, “So you do know what the print job was!”
Rolling her eyes, Sirius opens her mouth to reply but is interrupted again before she can, this time by the printer emitting a series of loud beeps.
The two of them turn to look at the machine, leaning sideways to read the message on the display screen: ‘Out of Ink.’
After a moment, Sirius sighs, “This is your fault, you know”
“My fault?” Lily crosses her arms again, outraged, “Oh, well I’m dreadfully sorry for using company ink in the company printer in order to print important company files,“
She takes a step back as Sirius stands up, directly in front of her yet still an inch or so shorter, but doesn’t halt in her tirade, “I mean the gall, right? I’m sure this is deeply inconvenient for you,”
As Sirius moves towards the supply cupboard, Lily walks backwards in front of her, still ranting and letting herself be led blindly.
“You know, this reminds me of an inconvenience I experienced not too long ago. Would you like to hear about it? You’re involved actually, what a coincidence!”
Sirius reaches out a hand as Lily’s back hits the door, turning the handle and pushing it open. Lily mirrors the steps that she takes, moving backwards into the cupboard, fuming and making sure Sirius is aware of that.
“I’d just had to deal with the inconvenience of going to fetch my stapler from my desk when I returned to collect my print job from the printer,”
The door shuts behind them, leaving them in darkness except for the light seeping in from the cracks around the door as Lily backs into one of the shelves, Sirius still right in front of her.
“And lo and behold, my print job was missing!”
Sirius lifts her arm up to get one of the ink cartridges from the shelf just above Lily’s shoulder.
“And what should I find in its stead but you!?”
With her last word, Lily jabs her index finger into Sirius’s sternum and their eyes meet, green on silver-grey, direct eye-contact, with inches between them and tension snapping into place like the pencil Lily had broken in an argument with Sirius a week prior.
The stapler clatters to the floor as she tangles her fingers in Sirius’s hair, their lips meeting in a hot, frantic kiss.
They’ve been doing this a lot recently, since they realised that they were both up for the same promotion and that arguing couldn’t quite expel the annoyance they feel for each other. It’s never planned, never purposeful, but it's starting to become a routine; one of them would accost the other with some complaint until, frustration thick in the air around them, they would crash into each other like tectonic plates - destruction, earthquakes.
Last week, Lily had ‘forgotten’ to forward an important email and Sirius had confronted her about it at the end of the day, once most people had already left. They had fucked up against a desk, Sirius three fingers deep and Lily desperately holding back moans as Joan from HR walked past on her way out.
A few days later, Lily had gone to yell about something Sirius had said to their boss and found her on a Zoom call, gesturing angrily at Lily to shut up. Somehow, that had ended with Lily on her knees under the desk eating her out as Sirius frantically tried to wrap up the meeting.
Now, Sirius is kissing her way down the side of Lily’s neck, long, elegant fingers working open the buttons of her blouse and sliding into her bra. Lily gasps at the touch, moving her hands from Sirius’ hair to slip up under the bottom of her shirt, pressing into her sides.
They’re never particularly careful about getting caught - this supply cupboard isn’t exactly out of the way - but Lily refuses to admit that this might do more to jeopardise her chances at the promotion than Sirius herself ever would have. Either way, she thinks she would still be entirely justified in blaming Sirius if she didn’t get it.
There’s someone else up for the promotion too but Lily can’t remember their name as Sirius bites lightly at her nipple and tugs her skirt up to sit around her hips. She throws her head back against the shelf behind her, running her hands through sleek, black hair again as Sirius sinks to her knees in front of her. Sirius pulls her knickers down, running her nose up her inner thigh, and Lily wraps a leg over her shoulder, pulling her closer.
Lily groans as Sirius licks into her - she despises her and is actively praying for her downfall, but god is she good with her tongue.
*****
One annoyingly earth-shattering orgasm later and Lily is pulling her knickers back up, pushing down her skirt and generally trying to look like she hadn’t had a head between her legs just a minute prior.
Sirius is standing up again, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand in a way that’s quite frankly obscene and grinning cockily at Lily in a way that makes her want to both smash her head against the shelves of the supply cupboard and get down on her own knees and return the favour. Instead she buttons up her blouse and tucks it into her skirt, frowning at Sirius.
“So,” she asks, “what did you do to my print job?”
Sirius’ grin widens, not even the slightest pretence of innocence now, shrugging as she replies, “Oh, I threw it in the bin.”
Lily huffs and marches past Sirius and out of the supply cupboard. She slams the door behind her and goes to put Sirius’ print job in the shredder.
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foreverdolly · 2 years
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hi!!! congratulations! i wanted to request biker!austin with the enemies to lovers trope and the quotes “i want it to hurt” and “quit being such a brat”
i love you!!
𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 | 𝐛𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐫!𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐮𝐭𝐥𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
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prompt: "I want it to hurt" and "quit being such a brat"
song: tear you apart - she wants revenge
word count: 1.8k
notes/warnings: biker!austin has my whole heart. the reader being such a brat was honestly so sexy to write. . . i edited this while i was half asleep, so hopefully i didn’t miss any errors! i love you too, angel! thank you for the request ;)
Disobeying orders just so happened to be your specialty though. 
Disobeying orders just so happened to be your specialty though. 
Your father had been a part of the very same motorcycle club that Austin’s own father had once led. You were practically raised in the clubhouse since you had been in diapers, and now that your father had retired you found it hard to stay away. You always gravitated towards men that liked to stay in trouble. The kind that drank too much booze and snorted whatever they could get their hands on. 
You rode them for all that they were worth and kicked them to the curb the second that you became their latest fix. Life was easy that way. 
But nobody knew you quite like Austin. 
But nobody knew you quite like Austin. 
Gone were the days of him following after you like a little lost puppy. Now he treated you more like a nuisance than anything. Maybe he was still butthurt about that. . . thing that happened between the two of you right before you had left on your latest adventure. 
When Austin practically spat your name, the warmth of his body directly behind you, his shadow looming over you, the other men all shut their mouths and took a collective step back. 
You had to hand it to the blonde; his father’s constant verbal abuse had turned him into one scary son of a bitch. Fear was a hard emotion to inspire in you, yet the hairs on your arms were beginning to stand on end. 
Still, you scoffed in annoyance before turning on the heels of your vintage cowboy boots, staring the man down through narrowed eyes. 
“What do you want, Butler?” You tilted your head to the side ever so slightly, a teasing grin pulling up at the corners of your mouth. 
The muscle in Austin’s jaw jumped as he clenched his teeth, his blue eyes hard as steel now that he was staring you down. Still, you didn’t falter. You kept your shoulders relaxed, her hand lazily holding a bottle of beer by the lip of the glass. You were just there to have a good time. He was the asshole that was about to cause a scene. 
You had a way of getting under his skin. It was a talent, really. 
He reached out, locking down on your wrist with a vice like grip so that he could tug you back towards his office. You knew him well enough to understand that he had an image to uphold. Yelling at a tiny girl in front of everybody wasn’t a very good look for him, you supposed. Beer sloshed onto the ground as he continued to roughly tug you, not caring about your small hisses and groans of discomfort. He finally let you go after he slammed the door closed, the well used dart board swinging back against the wood. 
“What the hell was that for?” You gasped out, holding your arm up in front of your face. Sure enough, the skin looked a bit red from his ape-like strength. “God damn caveman. You could have just told me that you wanted to speak with me. Not break my fuckin’ wrist.”
His back was facing you, his shoulders already huffing with labored breaths. You were poking the bear and you knew it. You should stop. 
But you just loved doing it so much. 
Getting reactions out of him was one of your favorite pastimes. He just looked so cute when he was angry, what with his big blue eyes narrowed. His plump lips pulled into a deep frown. God, he was doing it now. You were just about to open your mouth, hellbent on getting him even more wound up than he already was. 
That was before he slammed his hands down onto his desk, sending papers flying off of the sides. A mug filled with pens teetered over the edge, shattering against the old wooden floor. Your jaw ticked, your lashes fluttering as you tried to assimilate the mess around you. 
“I tried being nice and you just ignored me.” He spat out, his hands still braced against the desk, his broad shoulders hunched. 
You stood there a few more seconds, trying to decide if egging him on was the best thing to do in this situation. The older he gets, the more brash and angry he is. 
You ‘tsk’, leaning back against the door as you motion towards the floors. Of course he can’t see you with his back turned, but you don’t care. “God, why are you such a baby? You’re this upset over me not paying attention to you? We’re not twelve anymore.” 
You dragged the heels of your feet as you approached his desk, bending down so that you could pick up one of the broken pieces of pottery. You turned the piece over in your hand, trying to flesh out what kind of design had been painted onto it. Austin snatched the piece out from between your fingers, and all you could do was watch as his fist clenched down and around the shard. You flinched, your eyes flickering up to his face. 
“Quit,” He spoke between clenched teeth, his fist trembling as he tightened his hold on the glass. “Acting like such a fuckin’ brat.” Blood began to drip down the sun kissed skin of his wrist and onto the floor at his feet. 
Your chest tightened, but you decided to ignore the insult. Instead you reached out, taking his hand in yours. “Let go.” You spoke, trying to pry his fingers open. He strengthened his hold, sending even more fat droplets onto the ground. 
“Aus, let go! You’re hurting yourself!” You gave his solid chest a push, making him take a step back. The glass was sent clattering to the ground as he stumbled back into the desk, the legs scrapping loudly. If anybody heard the muffled sounds of your fight from outside of the door, nobody was coming to either of your rescue. 
“I want it to hurt! What the fuck is wrong with you, huh?!” He finally yelled, the muscles of his biceps flexing as he gripped down onto the edge of the desk. You can’t remember a time where you had seen him this angry at you. You must have seriously struck a nerve earlier. 
“Why are you acting like this? Jesus. . . You need to calm the fuck do-” 
“You’re just gonna act like nothing happened. Like it didn’t mean anything.” 
You froze, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. He was that upset over. . . over what happened two months ago? 
“It didn’t mean anything.” You told him, suddenly looking over his face more carefully. 
He laughed humorlessly, his jaw clicking as he leaned his neck back, staring up at the ceiling for a couple of seconds. He was trying to figure out how to handle this situation. 
“Bull fuckin’ shit, it didn’t mean anything. You’re a liar.” 
“Austin. . .” You were approaching the situation a little more carefully now that you knew just how emotional he was over it. He was reacting with anger, but you could see the sadness in his eyes. “It was just sex-” 
“Yeah, sex.” He straightened up to his full height, towering over you. “Between us. You and me. We’ve known each other since we were kids. What happened wasn’t just sex.” He grabbed a fist full of wavy blonde locks, giving them a few tugs in frustration when he took in your blank expression. 
“Don’t try to gaslight me into believing that I’m crazy. I was right there with you.” He was trying to reason with you. 
If you were any other girl then you would have given in right away. If you were any other girl you would have agreed with him- told him that you hadn’t stopped thinking about him ever since you left. 
But you weren’t any other girl. 
You weren’t good at expressing your emotions. Whenever you were forced to you often shut down. You could feel yourself doing that now, all while trying to figure out how to salvage whatever fucked up relationship the two of you had before sex ruined everything. For the last ten years the two of you had been like fire and ice. You two would spit insult after insult at each other, all while knowing that the two of you were a match made in hell. 
You hated his guts, all while loving the shit out of him too. 
“W-We. . .” You swallowed when he took a step closer to you, the toes of his motorcycle boots bumping against your own. “We would never work. We’d just end up killing each other.” You tried, motioning between the two of you. 
“I know that you hate feeling tied down. I do too. But I can’t get you off of my mind.” It was hard to breathe when he was looking at you like that. 
He was looking at you like he loved you. 
He was smart for not giving you enough time to answer. You were stubborn, and you were positive that you’d say the wrong thing. You were bound to mess up and say something that you truly hurt him. Something you truly didn’t mean. 
His lips were just as soft and warm against yours as you remembered. Maybe your overactive mind was playing tricks on you, but you could have sworn that you could feel his hand tremble as he reached down to cup your cheek, his lips pressing kisses down the corner of your mouth, and then down your jaw. You could feel his heavy breaths against your bare collarbones, and all at once you realized that you wouldn’t be able to stop this from happening. 
Not because you were too afraid to say anything. Not because you hated the thought of rejecting him. 
But because you wanted it. 
He was right. He was right about it all, and part of you hated him for that.
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heartlessfujoshi · 7 months
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the horndog and the prince(ss) - a multi-chapter fic
Title: The Horndog and the Prince(ss) Chapter: 2 of 10 Fandom: FFVII Compilation Pairing: RufusReno (Rufus Shinra x Reno) Rating: Explicit (Explicit Sexual Content - Timeline what Timeline - Spanking) Word Count: ~3,270
Ch 1
---
Rufus struggled to get out of Reno’s hold, but with his Turk strength out in full force, it was a futile attempt. He wasn’t going to let the redhead get the best of him, though, and was contemplating kneeing him in the groin to escape, but then something happened that made it much easier to move. 
Reno’s PHS went off. 
The redhead reached for his phone, and brought it to his ear. “What.” The greeting was short and sweet, but it was a distraction that Rufus used to his advantage. He pulled himself out of Reno’s arms, and got out of the bed, holding a pillow against his chest, covering the necessary bits from sight. “What’d ya expect, yo? Yer calling me really fuckin’ early. What is it, boss?” 
Boss. Tseng. Rufus breathed a sigh of relief, happy that it seemed that their time was going to be cut short. He listened to the rest of the one-sided conversation, and then saw Reno close his phone with a grunt. “Trouble?” Rufus asked. 
“Yeah.” Reno got out of bed, and started to put his Turk suit back on. Rufus’ eyebrow raised up as he took in the sight of Reno’s muscular body. For someone as thin as he was, he was seriously cut and he couldn’t help but drool a little at getting to see those muscles work without any sort of hindrance. “Looks like our boss is fucking missing.” Reno grumbled, grabbing Rufus’ tie off the ground and threw it at him. “So now I gotta go downstairs and meet with Tseng, Rude and Elena, and make a plan as to where th’ fuck he is. Got any ideas, Princess?” 
Rufus blushed at the endearment. Why was that word worse than beautiful? Rufus couldn’t make any sense of it. He loathed the way it made his stomach churn in a way that made him feel like a school boy. “You tell me.” He glared at Reno, as he got his own clothes back on. “Where is your boss?” 
“RIGHT FUCKING HERE, YO.” Reno shouted at him, upset for an unknown reason. “Yer a fuckin’ pain in the ass, ya know that?” 
“You didn’t seem to think so last night.” Rufus was quick to remind him. 
“I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS YOU!” 
Smoothing down his shirt, Rufus shrugged his shoulders as he slipped his boots back on. “That is not my problem.” 
“Listen up, Princess.” Reno was soon in front of him, glaring down at him in a way that was making Rufus’ heart beat wildly inside of his own chest. “I don’t like being taken advantage of. Ye tricked me. That ain’t cool.” 
“Are you upset because it’s me? Or because I was able to do this to you?” Rufus asked, standing his ground as he stared at the Turk. 
Reno was fit to spit. He could see the anger increasing in his eyes. Rufus waited for an answer, but all he got was an annoyed scream and then Reno was turning away from him. “Fuck off, Rufus. Yer a fucking nightmare, yo.” 
He watched Reno leave his own apartment, slamming the front door for good effect. Rufus exhaled a long breath, not realizing he’d been holding it as Reno’s temper had been keeping him quiet. His shoulders dropped as he looked around the mess of a room. Rufus rubbed his hand over his face, then pulled his own PHS out of his pocket. He left Reno’s apartment, making sure to close the door behind him without the same fanfare that Reno had shown. 
Once up on his floor, he brought his PHS to his ear and called Tseng. “Where are you?” He asked, playing the fool for a few minutes later. 
“Sir?” Tseng’s voice came into his ear. “I was about to ask you the same question.” 
“I’m in my room, and you’re not here.” Rufus grunted, sitting down on his couch. He sat down too hard, though, and his ass ached in a way that hadn’t been present in a very long time. When was the last time he’d been intimate with a person like he had been with Reno? He was under constant surveillance by his Turks, so the opportunities were extremely low. He’d made his own luck the night before. 
“You were not there earlier.” 
“So?” 
“So?” He could hear the anger in Tseng’s voice. Unlike Reno, who was like a loaded gun, Tseng’s anger was quiet and cold. Rufus knew he had fucked up. “Sir, you do know that we’re currently on high alert because we thought you had been kidnapped.” 
He rolled his eyes. Always so dramatic. “I went out, and got back a few minutes ago. I don’t see why this has to be DefCon Three, Tseng. You know that I’m capable of taking care of myself.” 
“Understood.” Tseng ended the call without another word. Rufus threw his phone across the couch, and crossed his arms over his chest. He knew he had a few minutes before his own personal Turk would be returning to his suite, and knew that there was going to be a firm tongue lashing, and not the kind that he really wanted right now. No, that kind was reserved for a certain redheaded Turk. Who he hadn’t been able to explain why he’d done what he’d done the night before. Shit. 
Things were going to get messy. They already were, but Rufus was choosing to ignore that fact for the moment. 
Five minutes later, his suite door was opening, and in walked Tseng, looking extremely pissed off. Rufus held his head high, and stared right back at him. “You know you’re overreacting about this.” 
“Rufus.” The way his name was said, it made him feel sick to his stomach. Oh, how he hated making Tseng upset. But last night was worth it. And would be worth it in the future. He could handle Tseng. Had been handling him for years now. What was one more tongue lashing? “Your behavior is unfitting for a man of your stature.” 
“You’re upset because you couldn’t find me.” Rufus knew this game. “If you want an apology, you will not be getting one. I will make my own choices, Tseng.” 
“I am aware of this, Rufus.” Tseng’s voice still dripped with the icy anger that he could feel being directed towards him like a frigid blast. He refused to back down, though, and kept his head up. “You picked a very bad time to do something like this. We thought the worst because of that.” 
“And I’m here.” He swept his arm, moving it to showcase the room. “I’m not going anywhere.” 
“You’re correct. You are not.” There was a sharp knock at the door. Rufus turned his head as he tracked Tseng over towards it. The door opened, and there stood the person who he’d been with the night before, looking as put out as all can be, his EMR resting against his shoulder as he tapped it repeatedly. “Come in, Reno.” 
Rufus saw Reno enter his suite, but the redhead was not meeting his eyes. This can’t be good. “Why is he here?” Rufus asked, looking at Tseng. 
“He is here because he is taking over watching you for the time being.” Tseng adjusted his gloves. “We discussed it downstairs, once you let us know you were not kidnapped.” 
His eyes widened as he looked at Tseng. “You can’t be serious. He’s unfit to be my bodyguard.” 
“Fuck off.” Reno’s quip came out of his mouth, his body turned towards the window that showcased the beauty of Midgar. 
“Reno.” Tseng reprimanded him before Rufus could say something back. “Drop it.” 
“Yeah yeah, sorry, yo.” Reno, in fact, did not sound sorry at all. 
Tseng looked at him. “He will be with you at all times for the next week. I’m leaving with Rude and Elena to go and take care of a problem out in Cosmo Canyon.” 
“This is ridiculous.” Rufus tried not to get too excited by what Tseng was telling him. “He isn’t capable of keeping shit together, Tseng.” 
“Rufus.” He bit his tongue, knowing he was pushing it a bit too far as he saw Tseng rubbing his temples. “It’s temporary. When I return, things will go back to the way they were. This will do you some good.” 
“I haven’t done anything wrong!” Rufus shouted. “Why am I being punished?” 
Tseng raised his head and looked at him. “Because of what you did last night.” Rufus stared back at him. He can’t know what I did, can he? “Or whatever it was that made you not be here this morning.” Tseng went to the front door. “Reno - I expect nightly reports from you.” 
“Ye got it, boss.” Reno saluted. “I’ll make sure the Princess stays in line while yer gone.” 
“I have a name!” Rufus glared at the redhead. 
“I’ll return soon.” Tseng left the apartment, the door closing with a sound click. 
Rufus looked over at the redhead, who was glaring at him with hate in his eyes. “Ye fucked up, Ruf’.” 
“I did no such thing.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “If I fucked up, then what’s your excuse?” 
“I DIDN’T KNOW.” 
Right. He hadn’t known. “You never answered me before.” Rufus dropped his arms, and walked over to where Reno was standing. He could see his chest rising and falling, his breathing a bit quicker than normal. That’s interesting. Rufus stood directly in front of him, but didn’t touch him. “Are you upset because it’s me? Or because of something else?” 
“Yer jes tryin’ ta push my buttons, yo.” Reno glared back down at him, his EMR resting on his shoulder. “Ya better be careful, Princess.”
His stomach rolled at the name. It was degrading and awful, but the way that Reno said it made his heart flutter like a stupid school boy. “Maybe I am.” He reached for the EMR and disengaged it, so that Reno didn’t accidentally zap him. He returned it to his hands, feeling a bit better. He turned around and began to walk back over to his couch. “You weren’t supposed to know it was me. I fell asleep.” 
“That makes it worse, Ruf’.” 
Turning around, he looked at the redhead, who wore an expression he couldn’t get a read on. Was it sadness? That couldn’t be, because there was no reason to be sad. “Wouldn’t it have been better not knowing it was me, though?” Rufus sat down, and then flicked the hair off of his forehead. 
“How often do ya go and sleep with random people?” Reno didn’t answer his question, as he walked over and sat across from him on the chair located next to his couch. 
Heat raced to his cheeks as he looked down at his coffee table. “Never.” 
“Don’t lie ta me, Princess.” 
Lifting his head, he stared at Reno straight on. “I’m not lying. Last night was a fluke.” It was, and it wasn’t. He had gone to that bar to look for Reno, but he’d never admit that to him. Not now, at least. 
“Bullshit.” 
“What do you want me to say?” Rufus continued to glare at him. “I’m not going out tonight, if that’s what you’re worried about.”
“I know ya ain’t, cuz I’ll be with ya, twenty-four seven for th’ next week, yo.” 
A deep sigh left his mouth. “Fine. I know you will be.” 
“Why’d ya do it?” 
Rufus stared at his hands, feeling put on the spot. “Why’d I do what?” 
“Ya know.” 
“Because I was curious.” Rufus kept his eyes cast downward, afraid to look directly at Reno. “I had heard that you went to that bar, and wanted to see for myself.” 
He lifted his head just in time to see Reno’s mouth drop open in surprise. He quickly looked away, unsure how the redhead was going to handle that information. “Bullshit.” 
“Not bullshit.” He stood up, and approached where Reno was sitting. Figuring he had nothing to lose right now, he took a seat directly on his lap, his knees now pushed up against the back cushion, while he draped his arms over Reno’s shoulders. He felt the redhead’s hands touch his hips, preparing himself to be pushed away, but then there was no resistance there. Just two warm hands, holding his hips in a loose hold. “I went there to find you. I wanted to find you.” 
“Why?” The confusion was evident in Reno’s voice. “I ain’t nobody, Ruf’.” 
“But you are.” Lowering his head, he brought his lips to his jawline, and left a few kisses there before bringing his mouth to Reno’s ear. He could see his piercing, the small stud gleaming in the light. “You’re fascinating, Reno.” 
The hands on his hips moved down to his ass, and were now holding onto his cheeks in a way that made him release an involuntary moan. “Ye don’t know me.” 
“Yes, I do.” He brought his lips back to his jawline, then hovered them above Reno’s mouth. “I know you very well. Better than you know yourself, probably.” 
“Oh yeah? Then what is it that I want, yo?” 
“This.” 
He dropped his mouth onto Reno’s, and then moaned as he felt the redhead thrust his tongue into his mouth. The hands on his ass squeezed tight, and he couldn’t help but let out a keening moan. His hips rocked forward, and he could feel that Reno’s cock was already stiff, his own cock getting harder by the second. Every sweep of Reno’s tongue inside of his mouth was like mana from heaven. It was becoming difficult to breathe, as they kept recycling each other’s air by breathing in and out together. He broke off the kiss with a soft gasp. 
“Ye don’t know what I want.” Reno repeated into his ear, as he yanked hard on his hips, bringing him flush against his crotch. “I don’t want ya, Princess.” 
“Yes, you do.” Rufus moaned, his hips now moving more rapidly as their pelvis’ lined up perfectly. “Now shut up, and take me to bed.” 
Reno lifted him with no problem. Rufus wrapped his legs around his torso, and groaned as Reno’s mouth touched his neck, teeth latching onto him. He moaned as Reno kept biting him, only stopping to throw him down onto his bed. He pointed to his own dresser next to the bed, and Reno took the hint. Pulling out some lube and a condom, the items were dropped onto the bed as Rufus began to take his clothes off. 
Soon, he was on his hands and knees, his head facing the wall as he felt Reno’s hand slap down hard onto his ass. The debauched moan that left his mouth should have embarrassed him, but somehow, he knew he was safe with Reno. Reno could manipulate him in ways that he would never let anyone else touch him for fear they would go too far. Reno could give him what’s been aching for for years. A partner that could really get him off properly. 
“Ya like that, Princess?” Reno asked, slapping his ass a second time. His skin tingled where the slap had occurred, and all Rufus could do was moan in response. “Who knew ye’d like that kind of shit.” Reno sounded surprised, which was a blessing. “Ya like it rough?” 
Gripping onto the bedsheets with both hands, Rufus nodded his head. “Yes.” Heat flooded through his body as he felt the tip of Reno’s cock now pushing up against his puckering hole. “I like it rough.” 
“Ya didn’t say that last night.” 
“Didn’t want to.” 
“Scared to admit it?” 
Rufus turned his head, and looked at Reno. “Scared to admit it to you.” 
“Don’t worry, beautiful.” Rufus almost collapsed onto the bed at the way Reno said the word. “I’ll take good care of ya.” 
He was about to ask how, when Reno chose that moment to thrust his hips forward. Stars dotted his vision as he was treated to the redhead’s cock slamming back inside of him. Rufus wailed as he was fucked hard, his head dropping down as Reno’s cock did wondrous things to his body. He could feel his cock dripping, spilling onto his sheets below him, but he didn’t care. Nothing mattered right now except for the way that Reno was pounding his ass, his cock striking all the right spots deep inside of him. 
Reno grabbed onto his hips, and pulled him up onto his knees. “This is dangerous, yo.” Reno spoke into his ear, as his hand made a tight fist around Rufus’ cock. “Yer gonna fuckin’ kill me, aren’t ya?” 
“N-Never.” He moaned, his head now resting against Reno’s shoulder as the game of push and pull began. He knew he was going to come soon. The way his body was screaming for release, it was inevitable. “I won’t, Reno. Y-You have…to trust me…” 
“I don’t.” Reno snapped his hips hard, drilling his cock deeper into his body. “I won’t.” 
“Y-You will.”
The hand on his cock began to move at a quick rhythm, making Rufus moan louder. Reno’s teeth bit down on his earlobe, Rufus screaming as he began to come. His release made his head spin, as he listened to Reno whisper filth into his ear. “Yer gonna keep comin’ for me, Princess. Yer gonna keep coming until I fuckin’ tell ya ta stop.” 
Rufus moaned as he was pushed face down into the bed, his cock still dripping with his release, Reno’s hand now on the back of his neck, holding him down. He moaned as Reno’s hips bucked wildly against his, his cock dipping in and out of his ass at a fast pace. Rufus could feel his cock swelling back up as each hit of Reno’s cock was pushing right up against his prostate, making the job easier. And being held down was doing wonders for his arousal. He couldn’t help but moan into the mattress as Reno fucked him good. 
He came again two more times before Reno’s hips stuttered, and he listened to him moan through his own release. Rufus’ body dropped down onto the bed after Reno pulled out of him, his body covered in sweat. Panting hard, he saw the redhead stumble to the bathroom, and then heard him bitching about the condom. When he came back, Rufus was still trying to regulate his breathing, his body feeling like it was on fire, all his nerves were tingling and his head was swimming. 
It was perfect. 
A soft towel touched his ass, and then he could feel it touching his stomach. “Sorry about th’ mess, yo.” Reno was equally out of breath, and then dropped down onto the bed next to him. 
Lifting his head, Rufus brought it to Reno’s chest, and was pleased when he felt the Turk put his arms around him. “I don’t care.” It was true, he really didn’t. After that session, there was no way he would care about anything. He felt too good. 
“Yer a wild one, ain’t ya, Ruf’?” Reno’s hand was now playing with his hair, and he couldn’t help but smile as it felt nice to be touched so intimately. 
“Is that going to be a problem?” 
“Nah, I dig it.”
“Good.” 
He knew they had more to discuss, but after spending all night doing what they’d just done again, Rufus was exhausted. He soon fell asleep in Reno’s arms, and would deal with whatever this was that the two of them were getting themselves into later.  
---
Cross-posted to AO3
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viciousbite · 2 years
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@ikkaku-of-heart​ asked: 💀 (can be Michi or Noir doing the killing if you like)
Send me 💀for a drabble of my muse killing yours. // Not accepting
How long had he kept her alive? ... Time was something the Hound rarely paid attention to. The only thing he saw was how the body slowly began to weaken the longer he kept one alive, and how their bodies slowly transformed into a ghost version of their old one. In the woman’s case, her body was littered in bruises and cuts and bite marks as if a wild animal had attacked her in more than one occasion. 
Ikkaku, a member of the Heart Pirates, that was her name. Michi remembered it very well, but he didn’t use the name, he used anything other than her proper name. Nicknames, pet names, whatever came to his mind the moment he opened his mouth. “Your friends been adoring the gifts I sent them... The look on their faces is always priceless.” Michi murmured above Ikkaku’s bare form as his clawed fingers gently stroked the skin of her bare stomach. 
As his crimson eyes lingered down her form, he could see stumps of what was left of her left hand’s fingers while on the other side her hand was completely missing. Take away her most used body parts, and give them to those closest to her. It was a thrill like any other to Michi, he could barely contain his excitement whenever he heard the screams of pain. It was so hard to keep the blank expression on his face as he admired his latest piece of art. An art that would soon meet it’s end. 
As he leaned his face down next to her face, his nose pressed against the hollow of her malnourished cheek, he could hear her labored breathing. She was barely conscious, the constant loss of blood had left her lethargic, barely moving, as if she was a living corpse. “Don’t worry, darling... You will get back into their arms soon enough.” He whispered into her ear as one would a lover as his fingers slowly brushed back and forth upon her chest where her heart resided. It was time for the main course. 
With knees pressed upon each side of her hips, the Hound straightened his back and unsheathed a dark colored blade from his thigh. The red patterns of the blade gleamed in the darkness of the cell as he slowly brought it upon Ikkaku’s skin. He saw her chest raise and fall, a hitch of a breath came out, giving Michi the signal he craved. She would feel it all, as Michi wanted her to. She would feel every inch of the blade... A blade that slowly pressed below her collarbone. A whine, a twitch of muscles, Michi put in more pressure as the blade easily slid deeper into skin and flesh. A whimper and a gasp, and the weak struggle started below him. The man cracked a smile, sharp teeth prominent as the smile became twisted.
His blade cut downwards, between her breasts as the flesh opened by force and blood began to pool out in rivers. Before he knew it, the whimpering had turned into a quiet scream, her throat raspy from lack of hydration, as she gasped for breath and screamed in silent pain, unable to escape the torture. Michi loved every second of it, and whatever consequences came in the future with her death, he’d embrace them. No regrets, only the pleasure of the hunt, the play, is all he wanted. He was ecstatic.
His breaths were hot, and heavy, as he tossed the blade to the side and pressed his bare fingers into the fresh cut. Feeling the wet blood and the squish of flesh under his fingers made his tail wag behind his back. Like a happy dog ready to eat. A dog that tore its claws into the flesh and with force pulled the skin apart. Blood splattered upon his face and hands as he laid his eyes upon his prize beating below a cage of bones. “Stay with me a little longer little one... It’s almost done...” He reassured his victim, or in his cruel way, encouraged her to cling to life a few more painful moments. 
With bloody hands, the man gripped onto her rib cage and with ease snapped the obstacle away to get to his final prize. The body had gone silent, no more breath left to scream as her eyes were blown wide and filled with tears. Her heart beat in a slow rhythm, second by second getting slower and slower. Before it fully stopped, the Hound wrapped his fingers around the organ and stroked the sensitive flesh like it was something precious. A precious organ, that was ripped from it’s owner by force as the body left behind had gone still, no longer able to function without it’s most important organ. 
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The hound brought the heart to his face, nuzzling it and making a mess off his face. A strong scent of iron filled his nose as he slowly bit into the tender meat. The owner of the snack completely forgotten the more he devoured the organ. It was like a reward, after all the excitement and with the flesh he would have the energy to make something gorgeous of what was left of the owner... Oh, it was going to be gorgeous.
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lilyevanstan1325 · 9 months
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❤️ Still Falling For You ❤️
Chapter 1
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Bucky POV
When I open my eyes it is still dark outside.
I turn to my left side and a small hiss escapes my lips.
Damn!
Still sleepy, I didn't remember to pay attention to my left arm.
I get up slowly and sit down trying to turn on the small lamp on my bedside table trying to make as little noise as possible.
I don't want him to wake up.
Finally I find the lamp button and press it.
I blink furiously trying to get my sight used to the blinding light of the bulb.
Once I manage to focus on the room around me, I put all my attention on my arm.
I slowly pull up the sleeve of my shirt groaning in pain as the fabric rubs against my battered flesh.
Once the sleeve is lifted I try to ascertain the state of my wounds.
The three little burns on my arm are there, round and burning.
The skin is red and small blisters have formed in the center.
They're damn painful.
Fuck!
I push myself out of bed almost reluctantly but now that I'm awake I doubt I'll be able to fall asleep again.
A shiver strikes me as soon as my bare feet come into contact with the freezing cold of the tiles and as if that weren't enough a draft of cold air enters the window making the worn curtain sway slowly.
The house we live in is certainly not a villa but it is basically habitable.
If you get used to the drafts that come in from the old windows and the old boiler that mumbles before dispensing hot water it's not that bad to live there, it's still a roof over your head.
I grab my phone and check the time.
It's 5:30 in the morning.
Not so bad.
In the end, I was able to sleep for almost five hours.
It's almost a record for me.
In pain, I stand up, avoiding looking at my reflection in the mirror.
I hate who I am.
Too tall and slouchy for my age, awkward and awfully shy.
I have a lean physique.
I am weak and pathetic.
By now I sigh resigned and I walk towards the bathroom walking slowly and avoiding the creaking boards of the corridor, once I reach my destination I close the door behind me with the utmost attention, avoiding any noise that could trigger his anger.
Although I doubt that he is conscious at this time.
He probably won't even be in his bed.
He'll either be on the couch or he'll be directly collapsed on the porch of the house, too drunk to drag his stupid fucking ass inside the house.
Maybe if I'm lucky enough he'll be frozen to death...
God how much I hate him!
I undress, forcing myself to remain silent as I raise my arms to take off my shirt.
The neon hanging over my head flickers irritatingly.
From the pain I feel when lifting my arms, I believe that in addition to the burns there is more.
I think I have some cracked ribs.
But nothing broken.
I am sure of it because the pain is not comparable to that of the last time.
So I don't think I'll go to the hospital, Dr. Maximoff is always nice to me and I absolutely don't want to take advantage of it.
This time I can get by on my own.
I immerse myself under the jet of hot water placing my palms on the cold and cracked tiles in front of me and my muscles slowly melt, giving me a few moments of relief.
I raise my face dipping it under the direct jet of water losing myself for a moment in my thoughts, in my dark and tormented mind.
How the hell could I have reduced myself like this?
Why is my one constant desire is to close my eyes and never open them again?
Yet I'm only 18 and I'm in my senior year of high school.
I should have fun, make plans for my future…and instead when I think about my future I just want not to be alive.
Yet I was not like that.
There was a time when I was a happy kid.
I had dreams, passions.
I was smiling and full of life, full of love for my life.
But then happiness was taken from me on an ordinary day.
I shake my head trying to chase that damn memory away.
That damn accident.
I get out of the shower and run a hand on the fogged mirror and my pale, gaunt face fills my field of vision.
I run my hands through my hair that's too short.
A wave of disgust pervades me.
I hate them but I am obliged to cut them like this.
Obviously I can't contradict Colonel Barnes's orders.
I look down again towards the sink and grab the razor from above it.
“A real man cuts his own hair.And he shaves every morning.Nowadays he's full of guys with no rules.This is outrageous”
This is what my father repeats constantly.
According to him, we young people are outrageous, reckless.
While he who is a drunkard and a violent one should be the example to follow.
So to avoid pissing him off in any way I obey without ever complaining.
But obviously this is never enough and I am often his release valve after his alcoholic nights.
A man of fifty too frustrated and dissatisfied who vents all his discomfort on the only person on whom he can do it.
In the eyes of those who know him he is just a poor man who remained widower too soon, forced to manage alone a reckless teenager who often ends up involved in fights for some reason.
A man who always because of his unruly son had to leave the Army to be able to follow him in the best possible way.
But the truth is quite different.
The truth is that he has fallen in love with the bottle so much that he spends his evenings locked in the garage getting drunk almost to faint.
And when he doesn't pass out he goes back into the house like a fury, taking his anger out on me.
Like last night.
If I close my eyes I can still hear the sizzle of my flesh in contact with his cigarette.
Obviously the bastard does it out of sight of others so that his reputation remains impeccable.
He is not the classic drunkard who goes around the bars, he does away from prying eyes.
And he's also exceptionally smart.
He only inflicts beating on me so they are not visible, he hits points that I can easily hide.
Often, while he hurts me, I just hope he overdoes it and that in a fit of pure anger he loses his mind and kills me.
So that I can stop suffering.
Maybe if I were lucky I might even see my mother again.
I sigh wearily and a small pang passes through me from side to side.
Shit!
My battered ribs scream for mercy.
Once I have carefully shaved I go back to my room silently.
I wear clean clothes, the usual black jeans and a sweatshirt large enough to be able to disappear inside.
I grab my backpack and hurry to go down to the kitchen, there is 15 minutes to 7:00 and the bus will pass by 7:30 so I have to hurry.
I grab my old MP3 player and put it in my pocket.
Music helps me cut myself off from the world and survive in this hell of pain.
As I reach the door my gaze inadvertently touches the surface of the mirror next to the desk.
In the dim light of the room my eyes shine through it like two lapis lazuli.
And my mother's face fills my mind with such violence that it makes me stagger.
My eyes, her own eyes.
That's why I hate my reflection.
Because when I look at myself I see her.
In the blue eyes like a crystalline sea, in the hair as black as ebony, in the shape of the ears.
My face reminds me of the boundless love I had for that woman.
Winifred was sweet and kind.
She saw the world with different eyes, she was different from others.
She is almost strange.
She is a dreamer and passionate.
She had an immeasurable love for cooking, a love that she passed on to me and that for years I believed it was my way…but with her death it all ended.
Dreams, hopes, love.
She was everything I wanted to be.
I raise the hood of my shirt thus breaking the contact with the mirror and closing the door behind me as I go down the stairs to get to the kitchen.
Once downstairs I open the fridge but it is practically empty, there is only an almost empty milk carton and a few eggs.
I grab the milk by drinking directly from the carton and grabbing an apple from the kitchen counter I sit on one of the two mismatched chairs that are next to the table.
As I bite the apple I grab my math book from my backpack to finish the last few exercises before leaving the house.
Last night I took a double shift at Joe's and when I got home I was so tired I wanted to sleep.
Obviously I did not succeed in my intent because the Colonel, having seen me return at 10 pm, decided it was an impossible time and the rest is history...
I collapsed aching in bed after midnight had already passed for a while.
Joe is a little man of nearly 80 now and he has a small grocery store.
I've been working with him for two years, obviously only evening shifts because of the school but I'm happy to be able to work there.
The pay is not that great but it allows me to pay for what I need for school and to buy myself something to eat.
The Colonel hates having to provide for my needs so I have worked hard to be as independent as possible.
Reason why I have to travel by bus.
A bus pass costs a lot less than keeping a car.
I am so absorbed in the numbers in my notebook that I notice my father's presence when he is already behind me.
“Why the hell are you wasting your time with those stupid homework?School is of no use to a failure like you” he mumbles as he approaches the coffee machine and pours himself a generous dose into a cup.
I grit my teeth and clench my jaw in anger while remaining silent.
His big hand hits the back of my neck hard, causing my nose to hit the table.
"You heard me?I'm talking to you!" thunders him behind my back.
I quickly raise my head from the table and a hot gush of blood comes out of my nose, I walk away fast enough to be able not to dirty my homework with my blood.
Holding my nose with one hand, my eyes watering with pain, I grab a rag from the drawer and bring it to my face to try to stop the bleeding.
Fantastic!
All I needed was this.
The Colonel looks at me with his arms crossed with a raised eyebrow, as if he is daring me to react.
Why don't I do it?
Because he is big.
His arm is four times my size, his hand is as big as my face.
I would have no chance against him.
And he knows this and it amuses him.
"Then?" he asks in a mocking tone.
"Yes sir, I heard" I murmur through the rag.
He looks at me almost in disgust, muttering a "Sissy" with gritted teeth and a disgusted face.
I wipe my face and picking up all my things I leave the kitchen with my head down.
As soon as I cross the threshold of the house I breathe deeply.
At least until tonight I will stay away from this godforsaken hole.
I reach the bus stop which is one block from here while listening to my music.
I don't have a specific gender, I love everything.
From jazz to rock, I love pop and soul.
I get on the bus going to sit in the back seats and without realizing it, between the music and my thoughts, I arrive at school.
The famous "John Adams High School".
This is a school mostly attended by rich people, very rich people.
Sons of lawyers, entrepreneurs, politicians.
To be normal we are few and fortunately I am part of those few.
I can only attend it because in addition to being public it is part of the district where I live.
Luck or bad luck, it depends on the point of view.
I feel lucky because the John Adams High offers a comprehensive study plan with really good and trained teachers.
It is a truly exceptional school.
Unfortunate instead because I am being bullied by one of the popular guy in the school.
Ever since John Walker, son of Jason Walker aka the current mayor of New York, set his sights on me he has done nothing but make my four years in high school a fucking hell.
He is the classic son of a dad who drives around in luxury cars, squandering money he never had to sweat to get it.
Quarterback and captain of the school football team, he is flattered by all the girls.
A majestic future as a professional athlete radiates before him.
The classic blond idiot with blue eyes, all muscles and with little brain.
But I am the strange one, who is always alone and without friends.
The boy who always dresses in black and spends his days isolated from the world.
I always try to avoid him but unfortunately we follow some courses together and the harassment of him, both physical and verbal, has become increasingly heavy over the years.
I enter with my head down, avoiding eye contact with anyone.
I quickly head to my locker where I put my backpack taking with me what I will need for the next hours.
When I enter the classroom, Professor Talbot has not yet arrived.
I observe the classroom in front of me and immediately I look down.
Fantastic!
To get to my seat, I have to pass in front of Walker and his friends.
Unfortunately, Professor Talbot's course is one we have in common.
I wonder if my day can ever get worse.
I set off quickly hoping that Walker and those other idiots have something else on their minds this morning and leave me alone but unfortunately my prayers are not answered.
"Hey loser!" Walker yells at me, bursting out with laughter, followed closely by his friends.
I ignore him sitting at my desk but he doesn't give up.
“Hey loser!Pass me your math notebook.I have to copy your homework for the second hour” he whispers as he leans over to my seat.
I keep not answering him keeping my eyes down on my books hoping that he will leave me alone.
“I'm talking to you fagot!Give me your fucking notebook or when you leave school I'll make you spit blood with my fists" he intimates him.
I look up and his eyes, evil and soulless, stare intently at me.
He sits there boldly with his legs wide open, wearing his football team jacket.
I know that he would be capable of it and that he would have no problem with it.
In the first year he broke my arm by pushing me from the stands of the stadium.
The second year, he and his gang followed me to the library and beat me up and left me on the ground with a concussion.
Last year, however, they locked me in the locker room of the gym and left me there for the whole night.
For this year he is still limiting himself to continuous and constant verbal humiliations.
Walker is a sadistic bastard but in the eyes of the school and the teachers he is a model pupil, the pride of the school.
So resigned, I grab my notebook and hand it to him, he snatches it from my hands.
"Thanks sissy" he laughs at me with a cruel look.
I look down and a moment later Mr. Talbot makes his entrance starting his biology lesson.
After biology I go to Mr. Baker's math class.
And here for another two hours I have to put up with Walker calling me by every degrading nickname possible that his perverse mind can create.
I am his favorite target indeed as far as I know Walker is always nice with everyone, always ready to bestow smiles and handshakes, so I can say with absolute certainty that I am his only target.
I almost feel flattered.
I shake my head smiling bitterly to myself.
By now I have learned to suffer, to let insults slip on me.
I always try to focus my full attention only on the professors in front of me, focusing on their words and what I am learning.
And closing myself in my hard shell I manage to reach the lunch break with my limbs still attached to my body.
I fill my tray with food knowing that this will be the only real meal my stomach will see for today.
I quickly reach the table at the back of the large room, the only one nobody ever wants to sit at because it is too isolated.
But I love it for this very reason.
This place and the library are the only two places where, even if only briefly, I can stay away from everyone.
I stick a piece of what seems to be stewed with my fork and without thinking too much about it I put it in my mouth, starting to chew thoughtlessly.
The meat is hard, a sign that it has not been cooked very well.
The taste is bland, it was certainly cooked in some industrial broth.
The cut of meat doesn't look bad either but it's cooked like shit.
Had I been I would have finely chopped carrot, onion and celery which I would have browned over high heat with extra virgin olive oil.
In a separate pot I would have boiled a mix of vegetables such as potatoes, carrots, zucchini, tomatoes.
After boiling it for at least an hour I would have filtered it and separately blended the vegetables by adding some animal fat and making a velvety soup.
To the sauté I would have added the meat in chunks and after having browned it for a few minutes I would have added the broth by cooking everything for three hours on a very low heat.
Then I would have served the meat with the velvety soup and a drizzle of oil.
So yes it would have been perfect.
I feel my eyes pinch and even though I'm sure no one is watching me, I pull up the hood of my shirt to hide my eyes from the world.
Because this is what happens to me when I think about cooking.
My biggest dream, my biggest passion.
Passion that my mother passed on to me.
“When I grow up, I will become a great chef!You will be proud of me” I repeated to her every time we cooked together and she smiling at me revealed every little secret to enhance the delicious foods we cooked.
I wanted to be a chef...
I wanted to be a chef but the only one who supported my dream was always and only my mother.
And with her death my dream vanished.
With her death and with my father's blows.
For him, a former Colonel in the American Army, it is inconceivable and disparaging to think that his son, a man, felt fulfilled within the four walls of a kitchen.
I keep eating trying to focus on the last hours of class and the work shift that I would then have to face at Joe's.
But all my goods intentions go to hell when the doors of the cafeteria open and the twins Maximoff, Wanda and Pietro enter.
Beautiful and always smiling, they enter with a sure-footed step, laughing among themselves.
Pietro, blond with immense blue eyes, is a kind and also very nice guy.
He is the captain of the basketball team.
His sculpted physique attracts the gaze of many girls and dozens of them turn around giggling as he enters.
Wanda has long wavy hair, red like fire.
Her blue eyes scan the room in search of a free table.
She too, just like her twin, is beautiful.
A nice girl and loved by many, she is the president of the student committee.
She is always open to dialogue and is always ready to fight for anyone, always active in enforcing the rights of every minority present at school.
And immediately after them, more beautiful than ever, there is the only girl I have feel something for.
The only girl I've had a crush on for years.
But she is not just a girl…she is Eleanor Stark.
Eleanor is something sublime, an ethereal and blinding beauty.
She is tall with an elegant and curvy body, high and firm breasts.
Her beautiful and long legs would make even a saint lose his mind.
Today she is wearing a beautiful beige sweater of what appears to be a very fine cashmere and her beautiful legs are wrapped in a light pair of jeans.
At her feet she wears simple white sneakers.
I smile.
Absurd how her clothing is totally different from all the rich girls here.
While she is limited to jeans, sweaters and sneakers all the others use the school to show off clothes and shoes that I believe cost ten times my salary.
I watch her gracefully advance with the trusty camera around her neck.
And as if that weren't enough, she is also an artist.
But that's not the only thing that attracts me.
Her face is what struck me from the first moment my eyes rested on her sweet figure.
Long caramel-colored hair frames a face with delicate features in which are set the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen.
They are nutty with golden veins.
Her plump red lips are always folded into a sweet smile and two gorgeous dimples appear whenever she smiles.
But in addition to this, there is much more.
Eleanor is sweet, intelligent, kind.
She is practically perfect.
I have a secretly crush on her for four years...absurd how I can feel in love with her without ever even speaking to her.
She is the only girl in the world that I would like by my side but she is also the only girl in the world that I will never be able to get to.
Nora POV
“Oh hey Nora!Look here!" exclaims Wanda slamming a magazine on the table in front of my tray.
I look up listlessly from my lunch bringing my attention to that pile of papers in front of my gaze.
I grab the magazine and look at it carefully.
On the cover a photo makes a fine show of itself.
I look back at my best friend and drop the magazine on the table as if disgusted by it.
I watch her while she smiles at me slyly, reviving her hair with that gesture that she usually does.
"So?" I ask shrugging my shoulders.
"So?" Pietro echoes, leaning over the table, grabbing the magazine and waving it in front of my face.
I try to chase his hand away with one hand but he chuckles and, swinging back listlessly in his chair, starts leafing through the magazine.
"This is the fucking TIMES and you and your family are on its cover" exclaims Pietro shocked by my total disinterest in the matter, his big blue eyes stare at me while a lock of blond hair touches his forehead.
"Not a big deal" I reply by shrugging again and returning to focus on my lunch.
“Not a big deal?It's TIMES Nora!" Pietro exclaims, earning yet another shrug in response.
"On its cover there were John Kennedy, Queen Elizabeth" murmurs Pietro, chewing a bite of pizza.
"Martin Luther King" adds Wanda looking me straight in the eyes.
Pietro nods in the direction of his sister.
I roll my eyes and then bring my attention back to the cover of the TIMES.
I remember the day we took that photo.
It was a horrible day.
Pretending to be proud and in love with my family was a torture.
I found myself forced into a long one-shoulder dress in anthracite gray silk by Yves Saint Laurent.
The left side of the skirt was covered in elaborate black lace as the skirt stretched all the way around me.
I had had to put my hair in a tight and tidy chignon so that the jewels with the stratospheric cost I had around my neck and ears stood out powerfully.
In order to flaunt all our lousy wealth.
My mother, as slim and elegant as ever, was wrapped in a majestic peach-colored dress by Elie Saab.
It was all a puff of tulle and organza, her blond curls falling like golden threads down her bare back.
My father was all stiff and proud wrapped in his Valentino tailcoat sewn especially for him, on his nose rested his very expensive glasses with gradient lenses.
Only the most unbridled luxury for the great Tony Stark.
Tailcoat the same but many size less for my beloved little brother.
Looking at the image of him warms my heart.
He is the only reason why I haven't gone out of my mind yet, abandoning everything and everyone.
Peter was enthusiastic that day, he felt like a model.
Always ready to smile whenever the camera pointed at him.
He is my greatest pride and I love him more than anything else in the world.
"That is, look at you!" Wanda exclaims.
"You and your family look like fucking gods who came down to earth!" she adds laughing.
"Oh please Wanda! Shut the fuck up!" I exclaim, snatching the magazine from Pietro's hands and forcefully slipping it into my bag, hoping that the discussion will end in this way.
The twins look at each other giggling.
“Not a big deal” Pietro murmurs again imitating my voice, making me laugh.
"You're an idiot P" I tease him by throwing him a grape that he catches with his mouth and then winks at me.
Wanda laughs as she looks at the scene.
The twins and I have known each other since the first grade, since my father, in search of another great lawyer who could increase his empire, found Mr. Maximoff.
Mr. and Mrs. Maximoff are two wonderful people, always smiling and sweet.
Oleg is a successful lawyer and my father's right hand man.
Iryna is a powerful woman, she is the chief of surgery at New York Presbyterian Hospital.
They are two present and loving parents, always ready to spend their free time with their children.
In their home you can breathe love and lightness.
They are the family I would like.
I look back at the twins.
We have become inseparable.
It has always been the three of us.
Pietro is a good and kind guy.
In love with life.
In love with women, in love with the love.
Behind him he has a large group of suitors but, besides a few small adventures, he has not yet capitulated for any.
Unlike his sister Wanda who has been a steady couple with Sam Wilson for two years now.
Theirs was love at first sight.
Wanda was only 15 years old and Sam was already attending the last year but despite the age difference they fell madly in love with each other.
After graduation Sam joined the Air Force and despite the distance their love is stronger than ever.
Sam, whenever he can, takes the opportunity to go back to New York to see his girlfriend.
I'm more than sure that after Wanda graduates he will proposed to her.
They are absolutely made to be together.
I sigh dreamy lost in my thoughts.
I too dream of such a love.
Crazy, overwhelming, passionate.
I let my gaze wander around the mess hall and for a moment my gaze stops on the lonely boy who sits away from everyone.
James Barnes.
I don't know him personally, we just take a course together, but every time I see him I can only feel sad for him.
Loneliness is a horrible thing.
I know, because if it hadn't been for the twins I would have been completely alone.
Abandoned to myself.
Maybe on the outside it can look different but despite my popularity, due to my father's name, I have no friends.
The other rich kids in school over the years have tried to approach me but I've never been able to bond with anyone.
Not for my pride, I have never succeeded because of their poverty of soul.
All dressed in the latest fashion, always with the latest smartphone and the most expensive car.
This is the only thing that matters to them.
Money and fame.
But I don't want this.
I would just like to follow my dreams, my aspirations.
I would like to live my life freely and not submit to the choices my father and mother make for me.
They choose what to wear, which car to drive, what to eat, what to say.
My father has even already chosen my future, regardless of my will.
I have to become a lawyer, just like him.
According to him, I must carry on the family honor.
Do what all the Starks have done for more than five generations.
I feel like I'm trapped.
And even if I'm locked up in a gilded cage with all the comforts and luxuries in the end, it's still a cage.
And I feel that day after day I'm withering away.
My hand tightens convulsively around my camera that I always carry with me.
I couldn't live without.
Photography is all I love.
I love immortal moments that will live forever.
Being able to grasp the myriad of facets around me is all I want.
I sigh sadly, resting my head on the table above my crossed arms.
My gaze remains fixed on Barnes who, with his head bowed, eats lost in his thoughts.
His profile just protrudes from the large black hood that covers his head, a head which at this moment is bent slightly to the side.
The perfect curve of his nose runs down to his soft lips.
Seized by an impetus to which I cannot give an explanation, I raise my head from the table and grab the camera.
I bring it close to my face, focusing on the object of my interest.
In Barnes's face there is so much pain and resignation that it is almost magnificent and the urge to immortalize this beautiful pain spreads inexorably in me.
I take a couple of pictures and I freeze immediately when I feel Wanda's eyes burn on the back of my neck.
With feigned nonchalance I put the camera down on the table and resume eating an apple wedge.
"What are you doing?" my best friend asks me.
"Me? Nothing.I liked the light and I took some photos for the yearbook.That's all"
Wanda's left eyebrow soars dangerously upwards.
"Sure?I had the impression that you were photographing Barnes" she teases me.
I shake my head pretending to laugh.
"Oh please WeWe, don't be ridiculous" I tease her calling her by her nickname that her grandmother always uses and she hates so much.
In fact, she grabs a napkin from above the table and throws it at me.
"I hate that nickname!" she snorts crossing her arms to her chest while Pietro and I laugh heartily at her adorable pout.
I turn sideways just in time to find Barnes staring at me.
Our gazes meet for a few moments and it is as if an electrical discharge descends down my spine, radiating pure energy throughout my body.
His blue eyes pierce my soul, digging into me.
As if he could see inside me.
He is not looking at Eleanor.
No.
He is seeing Nora.
It lasts all the fraction of a moment because immediately afterwards my visual field is occupied by a large body.
I curse mentally.
“Hi Walker.Do you need something?" I ask trying not to impress too much disgust in my voice.
My father would be furious if I disrespect the mayor's son.
John smiles at me in a way that I think he thinks is captivating but that I find slimy.
He badly moves my camera and sits on the table right in front of me, I squint at him but he seems to ignore my silent warning.
"You know I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to the Spring Prom" he asks me leaning his elbow on his thigh and leaning towards me.
I withdraw a little, moving away from his face which is dangerously close to mine.
Of course I would never go with him but I don't want to be too cheeky.
"But tradition doesn't want girls to invite boys?" I ask him back, crossing my arms over my chest.
“Nah…who cares about tradition.So are you coming with me?Or have you already asked someone else?" he chuckles like it's impossible for me to pick anyone other than him.
As if in the last four years I haven't made him realize on more than one occasion that I'm not interested in him.
But he doesn't care and always comes back to charge.
I lean my back against the back of the chair and my eyes run to the table where Barnes used to be, only that he is no longer there.
I have time to see his back disappearing from the cafeteria doors.
I turn my gaze back to John Walker.
"Honestly, I haven't asked anyone yet.I haven't thought about it yet, after all there is still a month to go” I reply shrugging.
John gets up.
"Ok.I'll give you a few days to think about it”
So he winks and walks away.
I gasp at his impudence.
I turn to my friends.
“But have you seen it?What a great jerk” I exclaim furiously.
I hate Walker, his pride and everything he stands for.
He is a bad and arrogant guy, I would not go out with him even if he were the last man on earth.
"You won't really consider going with him, are you?" asks Wanda almost disgusted by the idea.
"Oh no!Rather, I shut myself up in a convent” I exclaim angrily, getting up from my seat.
Wanda and Pietro look at me as I get up and pick up my trusty camera and my bag.
"I have a free hour, Mrs. Harrison won't come today.I think I'll go to the library to catch up on my math homework” I tell my friends.
They nod.
"You have chemistry class, right?"
Wanda nods as she stands up and turns to his brother.
“Let's go P or we'll be late” she tells him grabbing him by the sleeve of his jacket and yanking him.
Pietro gets up snorting.
Together we leave the cafeteria.
"Will Sam be here for the Spring Prom?" I ask my friend filling the pleasant silence that surrounds us.
The corridors are still semi-deserted, most of the students are still divided between the courtyard and the cafeteria.
"He said he will do everything possible to be there" replies Wanda, reviving her beautiful hair with her hands.
I turn my attention to Pietro.
"And you?"
Pietro looks at me with a mischievous smile.
"I have received some invitations but I have not yet chosen"
Wanda and I look at each other.
"Are you aware that you are disgusting?" she asks, stopping in front of her locker to take out the books for Professor Stewart's course.
Pietro leans his back against the lockers, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Why?Girls love me.I just want to evaluate my chances well” he replies with a crooked smile.
"Braggart" I murmur, punching him playfully in the chest.
Then I turn to Wanda and kiss her cheek.
"I go to the library.See you in the parking lot at 3 pm, okay?" I yell at the twins as I walk to my destination.
They both nod.
I walk along the long corridors towards the staircase that will take me to the large school library.
I think back to Walker's proposal.
I honestly don't really know who to invite for the spring prom.
Walker is excluded as well as every other guys in the school.
The problem is that I'm not interested in anyone but most of all I'm afraid.
Fear of not being able to understand if someone can love me out of interest in my immense heritage or out of real interest in my person.
Here's another reason why I hate being so rich.
I will always be afraid to trust people.
I may not go to the prom but Wanda would disagree.
If I asked Pietro he would gladly accompany me but I don't want him to give up the opportunity to go out with some beautiful girl.
Shit!
I stop in front of the library door trying to get all these stupid thoughts out of my mind.
I will have time to find a solution, now I just have to be able to finish these stupid homeworks.
I admit it.
I have a few small problems with math, nothing insurmountable but still a nuisance.
I enter the library showing my student card to the librarian and I walk towards a specific point.
In the middle of the shelves on the west side of the library there is a table positioned right in front of a huge window.
I love that place.
Being isolated practically I always find it free and being able to sit there and do my homework observing Central Park helps me to clear my mind of any problems.
I turn the corner but immediately realize that the table is already occupied, disconsolately I'm about to go back when I recognize who is occupying the table.
So with an uncertain step I decide to approach.
"Excuse me?Is this seat occupied?" I ask politely but without getting any answer.
I clear my throat.
"Excuse me?"
But still no answer.
I move from his back to his side and realize that Barnes is wearing earphones.
Obviously he didn't answer, he doesn't hear me.
So I gently pat his shoulder.
Barnes literally leaps into the air, scattering all the papers he held in his fingers on the floor.
His eyes immediately fall upon my face.
I remain dazed staring at him clutching my notebooks in my hands and I smile weakly at him.
He tears the headphones off his ears, his cheeks are red with embarrassment.
"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you" I murmured trying to reassure him with a smile.
He mumbles something incomprehensible, then clears his throat and repeats “No…no, don't worry.Did you need something?" he asks stammering as he bends down to collect his notes.
I bend down with him helping him to pick them up.
"Leave it alone" he murmurs but I shake my head continuing to collect the papers scattered on the floor.
Once finished, I hand them to him and he quickly grabs them.
"I wanted to know if I could sit here" I reply.
He gets up quickly picking up all his things and I look at him dazed.
"Yes sure.Sure” he murmurs in a faint voice.
"Sit down" he adds in a faint voice.
I continue to watch him as he picks up his MP3 player in a panic.
"Where are you going?" I ask instinctively, making him stop with the hand that holds the MP3 in midair.
He looks more confused than me.
"I'm leaving the table" he simply say.
I don't understand his words but then in a moment I realize.
And another wave of sadness overwhelms me.
I shake my head smiling at him.
“But I didn't ask you to leave.I just wanted to know if there is room for me too at this table" I tell him sitting in the seat in front of what he occupied until a few minutes ago.
I set my books on the table and feel his eyes on me I lift my face in his direction.
I smile at him again but his face remains impassive.
This guy isn't really used to being nice from others.
"For me you can stay"
"Really?"
“Stop it Barnes!Sit down” I laugh at his confused expression.
He slowly sits down.
"You know my name" he murmurs after a few minutes.
His is not a question.
I nod.
“We have been following the same course for four months.And we've been in the same school for almost four years.Of course I know your name” I chuckle.
A shy smile appears on his lips.
He's really cute when he smiles.
I don't think I've ever seen him do this before.
He looks back on his notes and I do the same.
I open the math book and try to apply myself with all my abilities.
After almost half an hour of trying to solve the same exercise, I throw my head back, puffing in exasperation.
Barnes lifts his head from his notes, observing me closely.
I disconsolately lowered my head to the book again trying to understand something.
"You have to multiply this first and then divide it by 2⁴" Barnes murmurs after a while as his long, tapered fingers appear in my field of vision, resting delicately on the numbers imprinted on the sheet.
I look up but he's not looking at me, his attention is all about the numbers.
I bite my lower lip and try to do as was just suggested to me.
"I can't believe!" I exclaim euphorically after trying again and finally being able to solve the math exercise.
I raise my head smiling beaming in Barnes's direction, he in turn looks at me almost intimidated.
"Thank you!I could never have done it alone.I'm a landslide in math” I admit, smiling embarrassed.
Barnes smiles at me and this time his eyes do too.
And my heart skips a beat.
What the hell is happening to me?
Embarrassed by my body's reaction to his smile, I move my gaze to the large window on my right but after a few moments out of the corner of my eye I notice Barnes getting up.
"Where are you going?" I ask instinctively regretting it almost immediately.
What the hell of a question is that?
We do not know each other, we are not friends, what leads me to invade his privacy like this?
Barnes watches me with his face on fire.
"I...I have lesson in fifteen minutes" he stutters scratching the back of his neck nervously.
“Yeah…yeah sorry Barnes!It's none of my business, I didn't want to meddle” I murmur torturing my hands nervously.
He stands still as if he doesn't know what to do.
We remain silent until he speaks.
"It's okay" he whispers in a faint voice.
“It's just that I'm not used to this.I'm not used to talking to others” he adds looking down at his feet.
I feel my throat tighten in a grip of displeasure.
Poor boy.
And so an idea flashes through my head, I don't know if I'm doing it for him or because I feel strangely attracted to him.
“How about we meet here every now and then during our lunch break?Maybe we can eat together and you can give me some math repetition.If I were to bring home an insufficiency, I think my father would go crazy" I speak in one breath laughing nervously.
Agitated by the feelings I'm experiencing.
I have seen Barnes for four years, almost every day, and yet I never noticed him the way it did today.
That meeting of our gazes in the mess hall has triggered something absurd and I can't pull back.
Barnes's eyes widen more and more at my every word.
He stares at me without saying anything.
Ok.
Maybe I haven't considered the fact that maybe he likes being alone.
With what conviction did I believe that the quiet boy of the school even remotely wants to be my friend?
"Forget it.Excuses me, I..."
"Ok!" he interrupts me in one breath.
"That's fine with me" he repeats with shortness of breath.
His chest rises and falls quickly, as if he is short of oxygen.
"I have maths on Tuesdays and Thursdays, if it's okay with you we can do in those days" I ask, smiling, happy that he accepted.
"Perfect!" he replies smiling at me again and sending my brain into a tailspin.
When he smiles a lovely dimple forms on his chin.
We say goodbye with the promise that tomorrow we would meet again at the same place at lunchtime.
I watch him as he goes away and once he disappears through the library doors I look back at the glimpse of Central Park that can be glimpsed from up here.
I have no idea what just happened but I just know I haven't felt this alive in a long, long time.
The math book lies in front of me but I can't help but ignore it.
At the moment my mind is occupied with something else.
My mind is occupied by a pair of gorgeous baby blue eyes.
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quindolyn · 3 years
Text
Weeks Without || Poly!Marauders
Word Count: 7,427
A/N: Happy birthday @littlest-dark-age ! While this was not initially meant for you I loved it so much that I thought you might too and I poured a lot of effort into it, enough to show you how much I love you I hope. I think I like this piece! It felt good to write and I hope you all like it too.
Warnings: too long, that's probably the biggest one, angst, fluff, and smut. Slight dom/sub dynamics with dom Rem and Siri, sub Jamesie and maybe switch reader? Potentially just sub, I don't know I feel like any reader x James interaction I write, unless explicitly stated otherwise is at least a little bit dom reader because I project. Oral (female receiving), fingering, hand job, palming, little bit of humiliation. I tried not to include Daddy kink because I know not everyone's into it and I'm pretty sure if any of my stuff can have a daddy kink it does so I tried switching it up. Insecure reader
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2k follower celebration
As you approached the end of your time at Hogwarts there was a certain fear that bubbled up inside of you. Like the rest of your peers you had worries about what waited for you outside of Hogwarts, where you were going to live, what you were going to do? How you were going to pay your bills and if the person, or in your case people, you were leaving with were going to stay by your side.
You were sure that everyone with a partner shared the same worries you did, that being if your relationship was going to survive outside of the sheltered walls inside which it formed. For you your worries were multiplied threefold. You didn’t just have one person you were worried would tire and leave you, you had three boys.
They were all undeniably beautiful, there were days you couldn’t fathom how people as beautiful as them had chosen someone like you.
Despite their constant praise, the way they gazed at you during class and in the halls, the hugs and kisses they gave you any chance they had you still weren’t convinced that you were enough for them.
You tried not to show it, tried not to show the boys you loved so dearly how your insecurities were eating away at you. You were eating less, sleeping less, and even though you spent all your time bent over a book in the library, eyes racing over the pages your studies were suffering too. The time you spent in the library wasn’t so much to actually study so much as it was to avoid your boys, even being around them had grown painful. Worried that every kiss they gave you might be getting you closer and closer to the last had you nauseous.
You knew it was ridiculous but you couldn’t help the feeling from gnawing away at you.
Your boys weren’t stupid, though James often acted as though he was, they noticed you pulling back from them. On the rare occasions they were able to get you with them for more than the duration of dinner it was like you were stopping yourself from enjoying being around them.
You’d catch yourself smiling too wide and drawback. To them it was like clouds blocking out the sun, though they’d swear they would’ve preferred the absence of the sun over yours.
There were only so many ways you could avoid them and when it came time for sleep there was no escaping the giant canopy bed in James’ headboy dorm that could easily fit all four of you. It was probably the easiest way for you to be around them, because after a long day of classes and extraneous studying you were out the minute your head hit the pillow. There was no time for them to prod you about your day, ask you where you’d been during your shared free period.
You speedily made your way through your evening routine before the rest of them got to the room and were climbing under the covers as they finally made their entrance.
Tonight you hadn’t been as lucky, as you barreled into the cozy dormitory, decorated in a frankly nauseating amount of scarlet and gold. You entered to find your three boyfriends were already waiting for you sprawled throughout the room.
James sat on the sofa to the left of the king bed, long legs sprawled out in front of him, they were so long that his feet stuck off the end. With his hands clasped behind his head acting as a pillow, he would’ve been the picture of leisure had it not been for the crease between his brows while he conversed with the two other boys in the room.
Sirius sat curled up in Remus’ lap, nestled together on the loveseat; there didn’t appear to be an inch of space between the two of them. Usually when they were found like this it was as though neither of them had a care in the world, too wrapped up in each other to notice anything else that went on around them. This time was different, Sirius held one of Remus’ hands in his, fiddling with it while he gazed off into the air, eyes focusing on nothing in particular.
It wasn’t tension clouding the room so much as it was worry. Worry about you, worry about your relationship, worry about what they might’ve said or done to hurt you.
As you stepped into the room all of their eyes shot to your figure, ultimately finding your face as they tried to tell what sorts of secrets you were hiding in that pretty head of yours.
“Hi poppet,” Remus spoke promptly, knowing that allowing the silence to stretch on would only serve to worsen the situation.
“You guys are here early.”
Out of the corner of your eye you saw the furrow between James’ brows deepen at your response, you weren’t usually one to sidestep a greeting like that. Though in all fairness you hadn’t been acting much like your usual self lately.
“We’ve missed you puppy, feels like we never see you anymore,” It was Sirius who spoke, hands still fidgeting with Remus’ long fingers, finding the Marauders ring that he wore on his ring finger and sliding it up and down the appendage.
You answered with a noncommittal hum as you toed off your shoes, abandoning them by the door to the dorm before moving to the bed where you shrugged off the bag that had been weighing down on your shoulder all day.
Remus quietly eased Sirius off of his lap, helping him into James' open arms awaiting his arrival. Once the raven haired male was settled into the larger boy’s grasp, strong, muscled arms holding him close to his equally toned chest Remus made his way toward you where you sat, silently working on the buttons of your blouse.
“You want help with those, bunny?” Came the steady baritone of Remus’ voice as he stood a few feet before you, head cocked to the side while his hands were buried deep inside of his pockets.
“I’m fine Rem, I’ve got it,” The use of the nickname normally would’ve worked to lighten the worries that were swirling around in the boy’s head. This was counteracted by the despondency of your voice pulling each syllable downwards into mumbled murmur.
“I hate to say it but Siri’s right (Y/N), we don’t see you anymore and we’ve tried to ignore this weird behavior, thinking that it would pass but it hasn’t,” The lycan spoke as he made his way to the bed, sitting down on the mattress next to you but sure to leave a decent amount of space between the two of you, not wanting to spook you more than you had seemed to be.
You ignored his words, instead focusing your attention on unzipping your skirt, loosening the waistband allowed you to take a deep breath you’d been yearning for all day.
“Bunny, we just want to know what’s wrong, talk to us please.”
Lifting your eyes, lids heavy from the stress of the day, at Remus’ desperate plea you found the looming figures of your other two boys hovering over his shoulder. Fingers intertwined as both stormy grey irises and hazel ones gazed at you.
“Nothing’s the matter Remus, I’m just a little stressed out is all. It's nothing any of you have done.”
Technically that was true, it was nothing your boys had done directly that had caused you to pull back from them but still, a lie by omission.
“Bullshit.”
Each of your heads whipped to find the voice who had spoken, your eyes landing on Sirius’ form you found his sullen figure glowering, tucked into James’ side.
“Sirius come on,” Remus murmured, urging the boy to keep his mouth shut.
“No its such fucking bullshit, she’s been acting like this for weeks and I’m sick and fucking tired of her acting like a toddler.” The boy swivelled, redirecting his attention back towards you, “Stop it (Y/N)! Stop lying to us, stop pulling away, just fucking talk to us for fuck’s sake because I can’t fucking do this anymore.”
With each word the boy’s voice raised an octave and you watched James’ hold on Sirius’ shoulder tighten as though he could contain the flow of words that tumbled from his mouth.
It was all too much, the insecure thoughts that bounced around your head, the aches that had settled in your limbs from pushing yourself too hard on too little sleep, the distinct throbbing that resided behind your temples nearly every day by this time.
Then add on Sirius’ harsh words it was all too much.
“I can’t do this,” You mumbled, haphazardly redoing the buttons of the blouse that had been hanging off your shoulders before pulling your bag, abandoned just minutes ago, back onto your shoulder.
“(Y/N) where are you going?” The frustration in Remus’ voice was evident, he’d been so understanding and gentle the past few weeks but even he had his limits and he was not about to watch you walk away from them.
“My dorm.”
“Since when do you sleep in your dorm?” It was the first time you’d heard James’ voice since you entered the lavish dorm room. The hurt laced in each word was unmistakable, guilt at being the one to hurt the boy you loved so much served to twist the knife that was already planted firmly between your ribs.
For the first time in weeks you finally voiced the overwhelming thought that had been plaguing you, the thought that had caused you to pull away from them in the first place, “You’re better off without me.”
It seemed as though everything in the castle had stopped to listen on your conversation, you were almost certain you could make out the little figure of a portrait peeking its head into the gargantuan frame that hung on the furthest wall of the dormitory should Dumbledore need to call James out in the middle of the night to perform some headboy duty.
The room was so quiet as the boys, your boys, soaked in your words that you swore you could hear Slughorn all the way down in the dungeons, munching on the lavish pineapple that had been dropped off at his office a few hours earlier and that he had saved until now to indulge himself in.
“What do you mean poppet?” The crease between Remus’ brows matched the confusion so evident in his voice.
“I mean…” You trailed off as you felt tears well in your eyes, weighing down on your bottom lashes as they threatened to spill over. You couldn’t find it within yourself to meet any of their gazes, instead keeping your head downturned, eyes trained on your sock clad feet and you shifted your weight from foot to foot.
Before you could force yourself to look up you felt a strong, steady hand slip under your mandible, from the rough calloused nature of said hand you knew without a doubt that it belonged to James.
He slowly turned your visage upwards to meet his, heart crumbling as he took in your waterlogged optics, red and puffy, sunken in my large dark shadows that appeared to be frighteningly close to bruises.
“Why are you thinking that you’re not good enough for us angel?” He spoke, his voice cracking as he took in your heart wrenching appearance.
“Jamie,” You sobbed before throwing yourself into his chest, the barriers you’d erected between you and the rest of them crumbling as you saw the helpless look in James’ beautiful hazel eyes.
The fears and doubts that had haunted you for weeks were still there but you couldn’t find it within yourself anymore to listen to them when they told you to keep your space, to hide from the people you loved the most.
You clung to James’ broad shoulders, standing on your tiptoes so that you could throw your arms around his neck. You felt the weight of your satchel once again slip from your shoulder accompanied by a soft thud against the hardwood floor as one of James’ arms wrapped around your waist, the other slipping under your bum, landing on your upper thighs to support your weight as he carried you over to the canopied bed.
James kept you safely in his lap, sitting down with Sirius and Remus on either side of the two of you.
Even if any of them wanted to pry you off of James there was no way you were leaving the warm solace of his hold, the solidity of his thighs underneath you, the strong planes of his back sprawled out underneath your palms.
There was a comfort in all of it that you hadn’t realized you missed so much, you felt a pang in your chest as you contemplated the boy’s reaction to your insecurities. Would they confirm them, and these past weeks, which could’ve been spent in the exact position you found yourself in now, soaking up the comfort they brought you, had been wasted?
Though you were perfectly content to sit there, snuggled into James’ chest the boys wanted answers, and though they tried their best this was the most like yourself you’d been in forever and they were desperate for answers to their questions before you slipped away from them again.
“I’m sorry I yelled Princess I’ve just been so worried about you,” Sirius murmured, his hand gently sliding up your thigh to rest under the hem of the plaid fabric.
All you could offer the boy was a nod as you turned your visage to meet his, wiping your nose with the back of your hand, “It’s okay Siri-”
“No it's not,” He refuted empathically, his hand moving from your thigh to cup your cheek, dragging his thumb across your cheek bone in soothing circles, “If anyone else spoke to you like that I’d hex them into oblivion. I’m sorry.”
He leaned down, tilting your face ever so slightly upwards to meet your lips. As usual his were unnaturally and enviously red, tasting of smoke and the strawberry candy he stole from the pockets of James’ robes.
His lips brushed gently against yours, it was the first kiss the two of you had shared in weeks that wasn’t a quick peck as you passed in the halls or as you rushed away from them after breakfast. Understandably, he was in no mood to rush it.
You melted into his touch as his grip on your cheek tightened, keeping you from pulling away as he deepened the kiss, kissing with a sort of passion foregin to the both of you. Different from what you were used to, lust filled kisses as he ground your hips into his. This was a sort of apology from the both of you, sorry to have shied away from this for so long and he sorry for blowing up at you.
He kept his lips melded to yours for as long as possible before finally pulling away to suck in a deep breath, replenishing his depleted lungs.
“Gotta tell us what’s going on in that pretty head of yours baby,” Came Remus’s voice from the other side of Jamesie’s broad shoulders, lulling your head off of the one it rested on to meet his sympathetic eyes.
You felt a familiar panic bubble up once again in your throat at the thought of voicing all your insecurities, scenario after scenario running through your head going through all the different ways the boys could react to your theories.
Suddenly you felt like an idiot and felt your cheeks burn as blood rushed to them, resisting the urge to bury your face back in James’ shoulder you swallowed, “W-What if,” You stopped for a moment, sniffing and going to wipe your nose on the back of your hand you were stopped when Remus’ large hand wrapped around your wrist.
Slender fingers slipped a silky hanky into your palm for you to wipe your nose on and you smiled as you glimpsed the initials “RJL” stitched sloppily into it. This was no doubt done by James when he was laid up with a Quidditch injury and had taken up stitching, amongst other things.
“Thanks Rem,” You murmured as you swiped the soft cloth underneath your nose before slipping it back into his hand, you felt your cheeks burn, embarrassed to be handing him back the used, and admittedly grosser material, but ever the gentleman he paid it no mind.
“Now what was it that you were saying (Y/N)?”
You braced yourself, clenching the covers into your fists as you forced the words that had been swirling around in your head out, coming to terms with that there was no more delaying the inevitable.
“Are we gonna stay together once we graduate?”
It was conflicting having finally spoken those words that had tormented you for countless days, hours upon hours of pain and anxiety causing you unspeakable turmoil. It felt as though it was all lifted from your shoulders, you’d spoken the words, put them out there and they were no longer your pain to bear alone.
At the same time, they didn’t just exist in your head anymore. They were real and the people who mattered most had just heard them, their impending response only served to make you grip the sheets even tighter.
“Where’s this coming from angel?” James asked, confusion tightening up his voice.
“I don’t know,” You whimpered, “I’ve just been thinking and you all are so fucking beautiful and perfect, how am I supposed to keep up with you when we leave here. I already don’t deserve any of you. It's already bad enough in here with all the girls and guys fawning over all of you but how am I supposed to fair when you have the entire world at your fingertips?”
As they soaked in the meaning behind your words James’ arms tightened around you to the point of bordering on discomfort but it was so reassuring to be held that close, to know that that was the reaction your words had on them that you couldn’t find it within yourself to complain, only to hold him even tighter.
“Darling,” Sirius’ sympathetic tone was enough to shatter your already fragile facade and before you knew it there were fat teardrops sliding along down your soft cheeks.
You could feel your tears dampening the material of James’ old t-shirt but couldn’t bring yourself to care.
“I-I don’t wanna lose you guys,” You sobbed, letting all the pent up emotion from the past weeks flow out, coming off of you in waves as the knot that had been residing in your chest slowly began to unravel. Each tender caress of your back and stroke of your hair assisted in its efforts until all that was left was your heart. Which, considering that it had been tangled up in barbed wire, thorns piercing your heart with every beat, was in surprisingly good condition, still intact and pumping along.
“You’re not gonna lose us (Y/N/N), ever,” James promised into your ear, his chapped lips brushing across the shell of your ear.
“You can’t promise that,” You protested, words muffled as you spoke into his shoulder, “There might be someone else who you guys love more than me, who’s prettier and smarter and can keep up with you all. M not good enough for any of you and what if one day you realize that?”
“Don’t talk like that princess,” Sirius’ grip was steely on your forearm as he used it to get your attention, “I’ve spent my entire life being told I wasn’t good enough and the truth is that we aren’t good enough for you. I know what it feels like to feel like the people in your life deserve better than you but there is no doing better than you, no one else on this earth holds a candle to you my beautiful girl.”
As you took in each of Sirius’ words letting them heal the puncture wounds on your heart from being wrapped in thorny vines Remus spoke, “We love you more than anything puppy, the day you walked into our lives was the best day of my life and I can’t think of a world where any of us live without you. Especially outside of Hogwarts, things are gonna be just as scary for us as they are for you poppet and I know I don’t wanna do it without you.”
It felt good to hear that the worries you’d been obsessing over were really all in your head, that they really did love you as much as you loved them, but there was still one boy you needed to hear the words from before you could completely relax.
“I’m going to marry one day (Y/N/N), I’m going to marry all of you and we’re going to be Misters and Missus Potter. Remmy’s right, I don’t wanna ever wake up and not have you right there next to me. Mum and Dad say I have to wait till we’re settled and we have jobs and a place to live before I can propose but it's gonna happen bunny, I just hope you don’t realize we’re a pile of daft idiots before then.”
As a lopsided goofy smile quirked his lips upward you felt a similar force mimicking the movement on your own, “Even if you all are daft idiots, m’never gonna find anyone like you guys. My pretty boys.”
“You hear that mates? We’re her pretty boys, if I didn’t know better I’d say (L/N) has a little crush on all of us.”
“Oh sod off Siri,” You let out a watery giggle, gently nudging the boy’s arm as you looked up at him through water logged lashes.
“Is that true puppy? You like us?” Even though he was usually the most mature of your boys Remus’ mischievous side never failed to shine when he called on it.
“No,” You refuted, “I’m actually rather fond of Severus now that you mention it.”
You’d pulled away from Jamesie’s chest to be able to look at each of them but with your words you were harshly tugged back into him.
“Not funny,” The sullen boy murmured into your ear, “Ours, not Snivellus’.”
“Shhh s’okay bubba I know you love me,” You soothed him, tangling your fingers in his hair like you knew he liked.
“I’m so sorry bunny we ever made you feel like Snape loved you more, I never want you to feel like we don’t love you.” He squeezed you, “How can we make it up to you?”
“I just got in my own head is all,” You explained, “I was telling the truth earlier when I said that it was nothing any of you had done, just shouldn’t spend all that time alone with my thoughts.”
Sirius’ elegant hand started rubbing up and down your back as you all sat there, soaking in each other’s presence after so many weeks of turmoil. Each time his hand slipped lower and lower down your back till he was groping your ass with the palm of his hand.
“Do you believe us poppet?” Remus asked, taking note of Sirius’ hand on your bum, “You believe that we’ll love you till the day we die?”
You nodded your head, face still buried into James’ neck, “I know you’re telling the truth Remmy, it's probably just going to take a little while for my brain to start really believing it, I spent so long worrying about it that mt stupid brain is’nt just gonna start listening to me.”
Remus nodded as he brushed a piece of hair from your face, it was the answer he’d been expecting.
“How about we show you how much we love you puppy?” Sirius asked from your other side, hand sliding from your ass to your thigh before slipping underneath the hem of your skirt.
“What do you mean Siri?” You cocked your head to the side in a rather obvious display of your confusion.
Wordlessly he stood up and slipped you from James’ lap moving to the foot of the bed where he laid you out on your back. Your blouse hung open off your shoulders revealing your lace clad breasts to the man as his eyes raked over your body, taking in every curve and line of your body.
Starting on the cushiony pillows of your lips, red and raw from gnawing away at them all the way down to the soft lines of your thighs he took his time appreciating every millimeter of you before dragging his eyes back up to the hem of your skirt.
One graceful hand slid to the waistband, already loosened he bent down to press a kiss where the material had rubbed your skin raw over the course of the day.
As your panty clad center was revealed to him Sirius swiftly dropped to his knees, his eyes quickly darting to Remus over your left shoulder for permission for what he was about to. It was granted to him with a soft nod.
“What are you doing Siri?” You pondered as he slid your legs apart from each other, sitting up on his knees as he began pressing sloppy kisses onto the insides of your thighs.
Instead of getting an answer Remus spoke, his words directed to the boy between your legs as though his words would have no consequence on you, “You can mark her Sirius, let everyone know that she’s our pretty girl.”
His words sent a zap of excitement up your back as you remembered how good it felt to be their pretty girl. Something you hadn’t felt like in weeks.
You bucked your hips as Sirius’ lips ghosted over your pussy still hidden to him behind the lacy material that matched your bra, “I’m showing you how much I love you puppy,'' He responded to your earlier posed question, “Now come on, lift your hips f’me,'' He murmured as he slipped the panties along with your school shirt from your hips revealing your pussy to his hungry gaze. Sirius carefully pulled the garments from your legs before dropping them to the floor next to where he knelt.
Inching closer and closer to your cunt as he worked his way up your thighs leaving a trail of kisses in his wake he made sure to sink his teeth into the flesh at certain points, just hard enough that if he sucked he was sure to leave behind mouse shaped bruises. The thought of being marked by him caused a ripple of arousal to go straight to your core.
Once he was satisfied with the marks he’d left on your thighs the raven haired boy moved quickly, nosing your folds apart to breathe in your scent, even with the minimal stimulation you’d had you were already soaking, though Sirius often seemed to do that to you.
“Fuck,” You swore as his nose bumped your clit and you reached out to grab onto the bedding but found James’ hand instead, wrapping your hand around his middle and index finger as you scrunched your eyes closed.
“Pretty baby,” James cooed as he leaned down to smear a kiss across your brow, furrowed from pleasure, “Siri making you feel good?”
You nodded fervently as the aforementioned boy licked a broad stripe from your quivering, sopping entrance to your clit, lifting up the hood to suck gently as James often sucked on your tits. You smiled thinking that you might fall asleep that way tonight because you knew nothing made the boy quite as happy as both falling asleep and waking up with your tit in his mouth.
“Use your words puppy,” Remus’ voice sounded from your otherside and you whipped your head to face him wondering when he’d moved over there, “Wanna hear that pretty voice of yours.”
“Yes Remmy, feels so so good,” Your words hitched as Sirius slipped a finger inside of you, continuing to suck on your clit as he did so.
As you spoke your eyes wandered downwards and you were met with a familiar bulge having formed in Remus’ trousers. The werewolf’s gaze followed yours and smiled as his eyes landed on his crotch.
Your head quickly pivoted to the otherside finding a matching bulge in James’ trousers. A pang of guilt hit your heart as you hadn’t even thought about either of their pleasure, being too overwhelmed by your own as Sirius had thrown your legs over his shoulders allowing him to pull himself closer to your dripping, aching cunt.
Somehow your hand had found its way to Remus’ cock as you mindlessly palmed at his bulge as though that and that alone would work to help it escape from its zippered cage and into your awaiting hand.
“Can I have your cock Rem, please?” You begged looking up at him with wide eyes, fingers fumbling as they finally stumbled across the zipper.
“Course you can bunny,such a good girl asking me for m’cock so nicely, let me get it out for you.”
Remus expertly lifted his hips as he unzipped his zipper, sliding his trousers and boxers down to his mid thigh allowing his cock to spring free.
As his cock was revealed to you Sirius added a second finger into your pussy, curling it at just the right spot to hit the sensitive spot inside of you each and every time he thrusted his fingers. As he pushed the second finger inside of you you felt the distinct chill of metal, you gasped at the unique, though certainly not unwelcome sensation.
Glancing downwards you saw that the hand belonging to the arm that was pinning your hips to the mattress did not bear the signature Marauders ring they all wore proudly on their ring finger. Having his marauders ring thrusted in and out of you made you clench around his long, slender fingers, the extra stretch provided by the jewelry was impossibly hot.
The combination of seeing Remus’ cock, standing proud and tall as his tip, bright red, leaked pre cum onto his shaft and the extra stretch of not only another finger inside of you, but a ring, had you squeezing your legs around Sirius’ head.
Flicking your gaze down towards him you were met with Sirius’ eyes already on you and he circled your clit with his tongue. Much to your chagrin he pulled his head away from your cunt, smoothing his palm up your stomach as he smiled at you with the most sincere look in his eyes, “You’re beautiful like this puppy, so perfect all laid out for us, making a mess all over my face.”
Looking at the bottom of his face you saw the mess he was talking about, his mouth and chin were glistening with your slick. Before you could reply Sirius was diving back into your pussy, scooping his arms under your thighs to lift your hips so that he had even more through access to your pretty cunt.
Any breath you would’ve used to respond was pulled from you as Sirius’ tongue began working magic on your cunt, tracing it painfully slowly before abruptly speeding up.
Remembering the gift that had been bestowed upon you you grappled for Remus’ cock, quickly wrapping your hand around it and beginning to pump up and down, loving nothing more than the way he throbbed beneath your touch.
“That’s a good girl, so good at playing with m’cock, there’s a good girl,”
“Like this?” Your wide eyes stared up at Remus as you twisted your wrist pulling a strangled gasp from him.
“Yes baby, just like that.”
You were mesmerized by his cock as you watched the head disappear before reappearing from your fist as you worked up and down his shaft, your hand working along the natural curve of his prick.
A whiny moan from your other side broke your concentration as you turned your head to investigate it, never halting your movements up and down Remus’ member.
Your eyes fell upon James’ whimpering form, shifting uncomfortably as his eyes flickered back and forth between your hand on Remus’ cock, Sirius’ head buried between your legs and your face, pleasure plastered over your every feature. God you looked beautiful when you were getting eaten out.
Finally you settled on the raging boner visible through James’ trousers, it looked almost painful the way it was straining against the restrictive fabric.
“Aww Jamesie m’sorry, been neglecting your cock,” You mewled, the hand not on Remus’ cock moving to palm James through his trousers.
“That’s okay bunny, m’good just watching you, fuck you’re gorgeous.”
You threw your head back as Sirius pinched at your clit, his tongue and fingers having swapped places as he circled your tight entrance which was clenching around nothing, but who could blame you?
You were in ecstasy.
There was a familiar fire burning in the pit of your belly, one that had begun simmering the second Sirius had looked you up and down once having laid you down on the bed.
A small whimper escaped you as you felt James’ strong calloused hand grope your clothed breast over the mesh and wire cage you kept them concealed in because fuck did that feel good.
You turned your visage to view Remus, he was painfully hard now and you made sure to keep groping James on the other side of you as you quickened your speed on Remus’ cock.
“Merlin puppy that feels so good, our good puppy. I love you so much my love, so much,” His praise came as he tangled his hands in your hair, using his hold on your to direct your face up to view his. He looked angelic, beads of sweat forming on his hairline with clouded over hazel eyes and the most beautiful lips you’d ever seen that released haggard groans and breaths.
A whine tumbled from your lips at the praise, Remus was always the gentler out of your doms, James barely counting as most of the time he was on his knees with you ready to obey his next command, but his praise seemed to be affecting you more than you were used to. Not that you were complaining though, on the contrary, you were living for it as it spurred you closer and closer to orgasm.
You squeezed Remus’ cock as Sirius nipped at your clit, the sensation walking the delicate line between pleasure and pain but jarring nonetheless. You’d be lying if you said that it didn’t send a rush of arousal to the fire now beginning to roar in your belly.
The feeling of James and Remus’ cocks in your hands was oddly erotic and as they worked to ground you as Sirius pulled you further and further into bliss the holdon them, feeling every vein and ridge and twitch turned you on more and more and had you bucking into Sirius’ mouth.
“I’m gonna cum!” You screamed as Sirius sped up his ministrations on your pussy, sucking your clit between his lips as he mercilessly pistoned his fingers in and out of you.
“M gonna cum too,” James admitted, sucking in a tight breath as he wriggled his hips, resisting the urge to buck up as you lackadaisically palmed at his still clothed crotch, never having the time to properly undress.
The thought of cumming with James pushed you right to the edge to the point where you could barely form words, but knowing you’d need permission before you were allowed to cum you sought out the one person who could grant you such. “Can I cum?” You pleaded, turning your head to face Remus, “Please Rem let me cum please!”
“You gonna cum too Jamesie?” The lycan’s eyes were trained on James’ face, eyes wide as he watched your hand slip up and down Remus’ curved length.
Upon receiving his answer, a yes delivered in rushed nods, Remus turned back to you, “Yes baby, go ahead and cum for us, make a mess all over Siri’s face. Gonna look so pretty when you cum undone, such a pretty girl.”
That final praise tipped you over the edge, sending you into a bliss filled oblivion as warmth seeped to every nook and cranny in your body. You felt your legs tense and spasm as you squeezed your thighs around Sirius’ head, bucking into his face to get as much stimulation as possible because there was no way for you to get enough.
You distantly registered a string of curses leaving your lips as euphoria washed through your body, taking with it any little doubts and worries that hadn’t parted with the boy’s earlier kind words.
As your orgasm passed and you blinked your eyes open you found a lightness in your chest you hadn’t felt in months. All the wounds from being wrapped up in thorns so long seemed to have healed on your heart, to see you tested it out, letting a singular thought about the boys drift through your consciousness. You were immediately reminded of Sirius’ head still in between your legs, lapping up the slick that had made a mess all over the insides of your thighs, James’ softening prick under one palm and Remus’ still rock hard one in the other.
All those worries you had let occupy your thoughts for months seemed stupid and trivial as you remembered just how much your boys loved you.
“Well would you look at that,” You were pulled from your thoughts by Remus’ voice, following his gaze to James who sat resting on his hands, panting, with an unmistakable stain fresh on the front of his trousers.
“Did Prongs cum in his pants?” Sirius simpered, also huffing, though for completely different reasons as he lifted his head from your cunt, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. The seemingly normal sight sent a shiver up your spine but you quickly shook the thought away.
You nodded your head as your eyes caught on the stain on the front of his trousers but no one seemed to notice.
James’ cheeks were burning bright red as Remus came up behind him, brushing the hair out of his face as he leaned down to press a kiss to the crown of James’ head.
Remus helped the submissive boy to his feet, all the while murmuring quiet praises you couldn’t hear from where you laid until one was spoken loudly enough for your ears, “Come on bubba lets get those boxers off,” The sandy haired boy prompted, “Show (Y/N/N) how pretty you think she is, she made you cum in your pants, I don’t think any of us have ever done that before have we?”
James shook his head as Remus quickly undid the zipper on the other boy’s trousers. The taller boy kneeled to help him step out of his trousers and boxers, leaving him naked from the waist down.
It was an undeniably hot sight, James’ half hard cock resting against his toned thigh, both covered in his cum from his untimely release.
Your eyes were pulled up to Remus as he let out an appreciative hum as he inspected the ruined boxers in his hand.
He slipped onto the bed next to you, “Come on puppy sit up f’me,” Opening his arm for you to settle into his side.
“And you Jamesie,” He prompted, patting his thigh for the boy to sit on. As James settled onto the hard plane of muscle Remus’ still throbbing erection poked into his back, the leaking head smearing precum along the boy’s toned back.
Sirius settled in behind all three of you, peering over your shoulder at the soiled boxers, one hand resting on your shoulder and the other on Remus’. You melted under his touch and snuggled ever closer into Remus’ side, turning your head to press a kiss to the back of Sirius’ hand.
“Y’made Jamesie cum without even taking him out of his pants puppy, can you believe that? That’s how fucking sexy we all think you are, made him cum without even directly touching his cock princess.”
“S’like you’ve got super powers,” James interjected, his eyes trained on you, “Your hand angel, its magic.”
You chuckled at his choice of words, whether or not you were intentional you doubted but it made them all the more cute.
“It’s so pretty,” You murmured, running your index finger through the sticky mess before bringing it up to your lips, sucking it completely clean as you couldn’t get enough of James’ perfect taste. “You taste really good Jamesie.”
The boy at the center of your current conversation turned, hiding his head in the crook of Remus’ neck mumbling a “thank you” into the delicate scarred skin.
“Don’t need to be shy,” Sirius crooned, out of character with the gentleness in his tone, as he combed his fingers through James’ dark tresses, “It’s fucking unbelievable how hot it is.”
You smiled at the delicate interaction between the two boys as James looked up at Sirius with wide eyes and puckered his lips, silently demanding a kiss. It was a demand Sirius was all too ready to obey as he dipped down, sealing James’ lips with his.
As he pulled away he caught you staring at him with want etched all over your face, “Don’t worry puppy,” He simpered, moving to cup your face in his hand, “You can get a kissie too.”
His tongue brushed against the seal of your slips as he deepened the kiss before abruptly pulling away, not wanting to get himself any more wound up than he already was.
“My beautiful girl,” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead as he smiled down at you.
“You two need to get cleaned up,” Remus spoke as you and Sirius gazed at each other, “You, especially Jamesie, made quite the mess of yourself.”
James whined at the subtle comment but aside from that made no other objection.
You on the other hand had other, more pressing worries.
“But what about you, Remmy? You’re still hard and Siri hasn’t even been touched yet, need to get you two off,” Your words came out frantic at the prospect of leaving two of the men you loved so much unsatisfied but Remus was quick to quell your worries with a soothing kiss to your hairline.
“Don’t worry poppet, Siri and I will take care of each other while Jamesie runs a bath for the two of you, yeah? We’ll be right in to join you, have a feeling neither of us are going to last all that long.”
You were reluctant to agree after how amazing you’d been made to feel by your boys since you’d arrived at the dorm and the thought of leaving two of them to take care of each other was frustrating, your frustration did not outweigh the pleasure a warm bubble bath promised and in the end you crumbled.
“Fine.”
“Good girl,” Remus extolled as James slipped from his lap and stood before you, arms open and ready to engulf your significantly smaller figure.
You all but leapt into his embrace, loving the way his strong arms could so easily support you.
“Come on angel,” He cooed down at you, “S’bath time.”
Remus and Sirius waited until the two of you had entered the adjoining bathroom before leaping to their feet, their hands quickly finding the other’s chest desperate to pull another close.
James kicked the door closed behind him but not with enough force to fully close the door, the room beyond it was still visible through a small crack.
Through the crack in the door you were able to see Remus and Sirius and even over the roar of the running water James had started that was slowly filling the ginormous bathtub that sat at the center of the room you could make out the words that fell from their lips.
“You’re gorgeous mon chéri,” Sirius muttered against Remus’ shoulder as he tugged on Remus’ cock, the two boys had made quick time and Sirius’ aching member was already in Remus’ palm.
“Just as beautiful as both of our babies.”
“Impossible.”
“Shut up and cum for Godric’s sake,” The smaller man whined, “I want a bath.”
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hawnks · 3 years
Text
when you and Shigaraki start dating the two-fingered gloves become permanent. he never takes them off unless it’s time for mayhem, and even then, only when you’re well clear of the scene.
it’s panic that drives him, his quirk a constant dread in the back of his mind. like he left the stove on, the door unlocked. like at any moment he could end you. he could do it accidentally. he could blink and you’d be gone.
once, you’re on top of him, all your weight balanced on his body. he can feel the breaths expanding your chest, the brush of your hair against his forehead. he wants to keen with how right it feels, wants to smother himself in you. and it makes him almost delirious. it makes him almost forget himself. his hands, where they rest on your hips, twitch. involuntary. a movement that takes less than a second, all fingers pressing down.
it could have killed you, if he hadn’t taken the precautions.
he could have killed you.
you don’t question him about the gloves, though you know he never used to wear them before he met you. eventually you’re glad for it. his touches grow more frequent, more casual. in the dark isolation of hideaways he holds your hand now. he tucks stray hairs behind your ear. he washes your back.
and you can touch him too.
before, all skinship had to be on his terms. you don’t sneak up on someone like Shigaraki— the consequences could be dire.
you never feared him. not like the others did, at least. not like he’d ever touch you with the intent to hurt. but you understood his quirk like you understood wild tigers. you would never willingly place yourself in its way.
it still leaves you breathless that you can simply sit yourself on his lap as he’s texting, steal his attention with a finger against his cheek.
“hey,” you say. “my turn.”
he finishes his message, tosses his phone beside him on the couch. his hands are slow as they tease up your sides, pausing to thumb at the underwire of your bra. “is it?” he returns.
you nod. “i’ve been waiting. been patient.”
his expression doesn’t change. he lifts his hips, pointedly bouncing you on his lap. but his hands don’t stop playing with the crease beneath your top. his eyes fall to your lips, throat, the place where your thigh presses against his midriff.
he hums. “and i guess you think you deserve a reward?”
you nod again, pouting the way that makes him crazy. “don’t we both?”
your hands draw up and down his biceps, feeling the wiry muscle beneath his hoody. he lets you play, let’s you do what ever you want. he’d never admit it, but you could do anything to him. you could gut him and he’d probably thank you.
just so long as it’s your pain, your touch. just you.
you let go of one arm, and he immediately circles it around you, pushes it up under your shirt so he can trace your spine. your own fingers draw down slowly, slowly. until you’re stroking his inner wrist with two fingers and then one. until you’re slipping that finger under the leather band, nail dragging against the tender skin of his palm.
he jolts beneath you, but you’ve got a hold of his wrist. he barely moves in your grip, and you don’t even pause, just keep petting him, the both of you gasping at the sensation.
he had started to heal, under the gloves. the scabs turned to scars, everything softening. the lack of direct stimulus made him sensitive. every graze of your finger against his palm feels like something brand new. like he’s just discovering touch.
it’s been ages since he felt something against his bare skin. at least, something he didn’t intend to destroy.
his lips finds yours, and you’re surprised by the intensity. his tongue takes up so much space in your mouth, his hips keep turning beneath yours, like he’s trying to find just the right angle. Shigaraki isn’t usually clumsy with you. heavy handed and embarrassingly straightforward about his desires, sure, but there is always reasoning behind what he does. always a means to an end.
this, how he holds you now, is decadent and overwhelming. at the back of your mind you’re certain the end here must be collision, wreckage.
his free hand finds your waist, right above your hip bone. he squeezes so hard it hurts. you can feel the raised seam of the leather, the stitches digging into you.
the pressure makes you think of breaking through, of pressing into, and—yeah .
you know. you get it.
“tomura,” you murmur against his lips. then again, more insistent.
he pulls back with a growl, bangs in his eyes.
you’d stopped moving the finger tucked into his glove, too focused on what he was doing to you, but you start to pull it back now.
he twitches like he’s going to stop you, like he’s going to keep you there. but he lets you go.
your palm slides around to the other side of his hand, cradling his knuckles, pulling him to meet you halfway as your lips press gently against each of his bare fingers. you nibble at the edge of the glove, kissing the space where the leather and his bare wrist meet.
you say, “isn’t this enough?”
there’s a heartbeat of silence. he’s shaking in your grip. from adrenaline. unspent lust. you’re not sure. when he speaks his voice is soft and rasping.
“yeah,” he says. “yes.”
and you know that’s a lie, but it’s one you both need.
he’d told you, once, a long time ago, that he’d cut off a finger for you, if you’d ask.
it was late and just after the first time you’d slept together. you were sitting with your back against his chest, coming down from it.
he smelled like smoke and sweat. he hadn’t slept in two days.
he shook then, too, as he held his hands out for your inspection, palms up. “just choose one.”
it was the way desperate people prayed. beggars and men dying of thirst. people who’s only option left was to ask, hands waiting to be filled.
“i can’t do that,” you told him. “why would i do that?”
he laughed, then. a dry chuckle buried against your throat, like he couldn’t believe the situation. that he, driven and powerful, would be wrapped around you like a cocoon. that everything, all he wanted in the world was to touch and be touched.
“because it would be okay,” he said. “if it was you.”
you clasped both his hands, lowered them into your lap. you pinched one of his fingertips, his ring finger. “this one,” you said, bumping your temple against his chin.
he nodded. “okay.”
“when all of this is over,” you said.
he nodded. “okay.”
and you knew over is never really coming. but it’s a lie you both need. and this would be enough.
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levi-lover · 3 years
Text
Something New
Modern Levi x fem!reader
WC: 2.7K
TW: NSFW, 18+ only!!! thigh riding, oral sex(m receiving), praise kink, levi’s fat ass 
AN: Ta-da! here is my first writing post in months! it was fun to get back into the swing of things again! this is dedicated to and inspired by mi amor, @flamingblinglove ! thank you for your love and support, love you so much! 
Your eyes traced the shape of the figure in front of you; patiently, you watched the man in front of you tug his slacks up his thighs. The fabric inched its way so painfully slow you wanted to pull it back down to watch him struggle again. A sigh escaped your lips as Levi buttoned his slacks up and fixed the creases in the mirror. 
“Tsk, did you shrink my laundry again?” Levi asked. 
You twirled your hair around your index finger. “Nope, you told me not to do your laundry anymore because I ruined your whites last time, remember?”
He grunted. “I guess you're right.” 
You walked over to him, resting your head on his shoulder, and traced your fingertips down his toned arms. “Why do you ask, love?”
Levi began buttoning his shirt, his gaze remained focused on his task. “My pants feel... tighter,” he grumbled. 
You raised an eyebrow and looked at Levi’s ass. His pants did look tighter…
“Baby, you look fine.”
“Fine?” he said, slightly exasperated. 
A chuckle left your mouth. “Levi, you look fucking hot.”
You pressed your body into Levi, grinding into his ass, your hands playfully left circles around his side thigh. His body slowly melted into yours, his eyes closed, his head resting in the crook of your shoulder. You left small kisses onto the exposed skin of his neck, your tongue gently lapped at his warm skin. 
The smell of his cologne, sweet and clean filled your nose. You pressed harder into him, his ass pressed closer to your core. 
“You always look so fucking hot,” you whispered against his neck. 
He laughed and removed your hands from his body. You whimpered but he frowned at you. “We need to get going, Hange and Erwin are expecting us soon.”
“Ugh, Levi you can’t do this to me.” 
He looked at you confused. “I didn’t do anything. You're the needy brat who can’t keep their hands to themselves.”
“Well, it’s not my fault your ass decided to be extra fat today.” You pouted and crossed your arms.
“Extra fat…” he repeated your words and went to the mirror to look at himself. 
There was no denying it, the seams of his pants were particularly tight on all sides of his lower body and the fabric covering his ass looked strained. He flexed his thighs and watched the fabric strain under the lights of your shared bedroom.
You sat down and watched him in anticipation, wanting nothing more than to run your cunt along the muscles of his thighs. “Miche, did put us on a new lower body regiment,” he muttered. 
“I see, tell him I said thanks.”
Levi raised an eyebrow at you and shook his head, a light dusting of pink formed on his cheeks. 
After years of being with you, he still hasn’t gotten used to your constant rain of compliments and showers of love. You patted the bed next to you, beckoning him to sit next to you. He sighed as he lowered his body next to yours. You took his hand and kissed his open palm, your gaze lingered on him, your lips warm on his skin. Levi watched you carefully, curious as to what you were going to do next. 
“God, I love you,” he whispered. He teased you about your neediness because he was too shy to tell you he loved how you loved him, how you treated him like the most precious thing around, and of course, he loved how much you needed him to please you. He would do anything for you. 
You smirked at him, lifting your body and placing your legs around his lap until you were straddling him. Your cunt centimeters away from his bulge. You raked your hands through his soft hair, looking down at him tenderly. Levi places two strong hands on your waist, pressing his thumb into your skin, rubbing circles into you. 
Lust leisurely overtook his gaze while he pressed you closer to him. He bucked his hips forward and grinded his growing cock against you. You moaned at the pressure, a tingling joy flowed through you. 
Watching Levi desperately trying to press his body onto yours turned you on more than anything, knowing that he wanted you as much as you wanted him. It lit something animalist inside of you, it narrowed your focus to Levi and him alone, his breathy whines in your ears, his firm grasp on your body. Fuck, that was the only thing that mattered. 
You traced his jawline with your tongue, bringing him closer with each stroke. Your weight was completely on him, his hard cock pressing against yours, you swayed your hips back and force, feeling your wetness dirty your underwear. Each stroke of his cock against your clit elicited a moan from the both of you. 
Levi’s hot breath was on your neck, kissing and sucking at your tender skin. You whined loudly wanting him to know how much you enjoyed his touch. 
His hand went to your ass, grabbing a handful of flesh and pushing you closer to him. The friction of your clothes was too much, you needed to feel him, your heated skin on his. 
Desperation filled your kisses, his warm tongue entered your mouth, lapping at your own. You felt as if your body was melting into his. Levi’s lips were soft and tender against yours compared to his rough grasp on your body. 
“Fuck, Levi I want you,” you whined.
“I’m all yours, baby,” he groaned back. 
You rocked your hips harder and faster, chasing the budding pressure inside of you. 
“Yeah, just like that,” Levi praised.
“W-wanna try something new,” you said breathlessly.
He raised an eyebrow, “Oh really? What do you want, baby?”
You raised your body slightly and shifted your body so you were completely sitting on Levi’s right thigh. He whimpered quietly at the absence of your body on his cock but your mouth nibbling on his earlobe distracted him. 
You dragged your cunt across the muscle of his thighs, sighing each time your clit grinded against him. Levi held on to your lower back and flexed his thigh giving you a harder surface to grind against. He snaked his hand under your shirt and pulled your bra down, allowing him to take your nipple in between his thumb and forefinger and slowly rub your soft flesh.  You closed your eyes, pleasure rolling through your body. Your cunt throbbed against your underwear. 
“Tsk, open your eyes, sweetheart,” Levi ordered. You had no choice but to gaze into his gray eyes, his normal bored expression was replaced by one of excitement and arousal. 
Fuck, that look made you want him even more. It made you want to do anything to keep his gaze on you. 
You circled your hips sensually, you could feel your high building inside of you. Levi wrapped his free arm around you, pulling you closer to his warm body. You held onto his shirt, wrinkling the fabric but he didn’t mind. Surprising, he loved how easily you came undone by humping his thigh like a fucking whore. 
“So fucking pretty,” he muttered into your mouth, “riding my thigh like that.”
“Love you,” you mouthed back.
He sucked on your lower lip, dragging out another moan from you, it was too much. The pressure inside of you was growing, faster and faster. Your head was dizzy and your heart pounding so loud you could hear it echoing in your ears alongside Levi’s panting. His dark hair normally put meticulously in its place was strewn about across his forehead. His face was glowy and pink, he looked fucking heavenly staring at you with those loving and needy eyes. 
“M’ close, Levi,” you whined.
“Cum for me, yeah?”
You nodded and rubbed your clit harder against him, the texture of your underwear heightening the feeling of pleasure running through your body. You cried out Levi’s name as your high came to a climax. He rocked his leg against you riding out your orgasm.
You went slack against his body, leaning your head on his shoulder. Levi smiled, his aching cock oozing precum and leaking onto his slacks. “Good girl,” he said, tucking your hair behind your ear, enjoying the view. 
You sighed and listened to his heartbeat. How long had you been thinking about riding him like that? A smile crept on your face, it was better than you imagined. 
“You ruined my slacks,” he said flatly.
You tucked your head into the crook of his neck. “Whatever, don't act like you didn’t like it?”
“What, watching you get yourself off like the desperate brat that you are?” 
You raised your upper body from his chest. “That, Mr. Ackerman,” you said, pointing at his crotch, “is telling me a completely different story.” 
He rolled his eyes. “I’m only a man, with a very hot girl grinding her needy cunt on me.”
You tilted your head and looked at him with an eyebrow raised. Slowly your hand reached over to palm his bulge. Levi let out a whimper and swallowed, he knew he wasn’t going to last long. Not after having you ride his thigh and definitely not with you looking at him with that look. 
“Oh, really, Mr. Ackerman,” you mumbled, stroking the outline of his cock. “Tell me what can I do to help?”
“Fuck, don’t do this,” he groaned. 
You looked at him innocently, a coy smile forming on your face. “Do what?” 
“You know what I want.”
“I do?” You cocked your head to the side. “You need to tell me, Levi.” 
His face was red and he was utterly flustered. You loved when this side of him came out, he became like putty in your hands, completely pliable to what you wanted. It made you feel powerful.
“I need you,” he whispered, leaning his head on your shoulder, “I need your mouth.”
“It’s right here, what do you need it for?”
“Shit, don’t make me say it,” he groaned, growing impatient as you continued rubbing him through his slacks. You clicked your tongue in response. “I need you to suck me off, please. Fuck, I need you so bad,” he said in the whiny, breathy voice that went straight to your core. 
You caressed his face in your hands, pulling his head upwards to face you. You planted a small kiss on his nose. “That’s all you needed to say.”
You got off his lap and pushed him on the bed, he fell back with a soft thud, his chest rose and fell in anticipation. He spread his legs for you, creating the perfect space for you to nuzzle your head in. 
Leisurely, you massaged his thighs, paying extra attention to the wet spot you left behind. Levi hid his eyes behind the crook of his elbow. You planted a kiss on his bulge and rubbed your face against it, the fabric of his pants was smooth and warm. 
The sound of his belt unbuckling filled the room, he groaned at the release of his pants. Your mouth watered at the sight of Levi’s hard cock straining against his boxers. 
“Fuck, Levi you’re so hard,” you whispered. He responded with a moan as you dragged your tongue from the base of his cock to the tip. In one smooth motion, you removed his boxers, allowing his cock to spring upwards, the tip was soaked with precum. 
The sight was enough to make your cunt throb, you pressed your legs together to bring some relief. Levi looked at you from under his arm and immediately closed his eyes again, the sight of you hungrily looking at him was seared into his mind. He knew he could come just by looking at you. 
You gathered saliva in your mouth and spit on his cock, allowing it to slowly drop down until it ran down his shaft. He helplessly bucked his hips forwards, a silent beg for your mouth. In his daily life, Levi had created a reputation for himself, he was cold and indifferent but when he was under your touch he forgets all about it and could only think about you and your touch. 
“You’re such a good boy,” you murmured. 
“Yeah?” Levi breathed out.
“The best, Levi,” you said before taking him into your mouth. You flattened your tongue and pressed into him, drawing out a long groan from him. 
“F-fuck,” he panted. His cock pulsed in your mouth and you whimpered around him; he arched his back, pushing himself further into your mouth. You kept him there for a moment before lifting your head and removing him out of your mouth with a loud pop. 
A string of saliva and precum hung down your mouth, he chuckled and smeared it across your face. You were so good to him, he thought. 
You lowered your head again, this time taking one of his balls into your mouth while your hand rubbed his sensitive tip, your index finger ran along his slit. Levi ran his hands along your scalp and tugged at your hair. 
With your right hand, you smeared the precum and saliva up and down his shaft, applying a small amount of pressure with elicited small whimpers from him. You turned your head to his thighs and observed how his muscle twitched under his skin. You kissed and sucked on his inner thigh, bruises gradually formed after each kiss. 
“Mmm,” Levi stuttered after sucking on a particularly sensitive spot. You grabbed his hips, pressing him further into the bed, and used it as leverage as you placed him back into your mouth. Levi bucked upwards, in a weak attempt to push himself further into your wet mouth. 
You bobbed your head up and down until his cock hit the back of your throat and Levi let out the most beautiful noise you’d ever heard, your cunt fluttered at his colorful language. “S-hit, yeah. God, just like that.” 
Your jaw was aching and tears were forming in the corners of your eyes, Levi reached down and wiped them from your face. “I fucking love you,” he panted. 
You hummed in response, the vibrations echoed throughout his body and it was too much. Levi was going to come.
His toes curled in his dress socks, his back arched while his hands went straight to your hair, keeping you locked in place he came into your mouth. Eagerly, you swallowed everything he gave you as he meekly thrusted his hips forward. 
You removed him from your mouth and left a little kiss on his tip before crawling up to lay beside him. Levi’s eyes were closed, his face was red and sweaty, and a small smile had formed on his face; he looked blissful. 
He wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close to him, and kissed your cheek. You were both silent for a moment as you two waited for your heartbeats to go back to normal. You pulled at your pants and underwear, you were completely soaked and it was uncomfortable. 
“You’re a fucking pervert,” he breathed out. 
“Whaat? Me?”
“Yes, you.” He gently flicked your forehead. “Riding my thigh like that? Only perverts do that.”
“Don’t pretend you didn’t like it Mr. “I Need You To Suck Me Off”. Only perverts want their dick sucked.” 
He chuckled and rested his chin on your forehead. “It looked like you wanted to do it, I was just helping.”
“Whatever.” 
“You might be a pervert but you’re my pervert,” he said. Your chest bloomed with heat and you nuzzled our face into his neck.
Levi’s phone buzzed from the nightstand. “It’s Hange, they’re asking where we’re at.” You read from the screen. 
“Tell them your sick or something.”
“Levi, I’m fine why would I – Unless you want to stay home and do more perverted things,” you teased. 
“Sure, something like that,” he grumbled and traced delicate lines on your spine. 
You smiled while texting Hange back, happy to know you weren’t the only one with little perverted thoughts. 
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theepisceswriter · 3 years
Text
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Doing dirty things w/ AOT characters while you two most definitely shouldn’t be (Reiner, Erwin, Zeke, Levi)
A/N: my faithful stoned thot anon, shoutout to you for this request and I hope this was something like you were imagining in your mind. I know you only asked for simple mundane tasks, but I wanted to be extra and include more situations. I can’t wait to work on the other ones you sent me !
Synopsis: Basically, you’re trying to do a task that requires a lot of your attention or you to be silent (like on the phone, out to eat with friends, etc), but your partner really really needs some attention in that moment. I suck at descriptions sorry 🥴 If you see any typos no u didn’t, but really I was too lazy to proofread.
TW: Modern AU, hehe naughtiness obviously, choking for Zeke, also embarrassment, fembodied!reader, 18+, MINORS DNI!
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REINER BRAUN: Movie night with friends
Reiner just couldn’t help himself, he really couldn’t. The first sight of you in your silky pajama shorts and this man’s thoughts were going crazy watching you parade around the house as you grabbed the snacks and needed materials for tonight’s movie night with some of you guys’ friends. Luckily the fabric of his pajama pants were loose enough to hide the growing boner in his pants, but of course he made it known to you by approaching you from behind and pressing it against your ass so you could feel just how hard you had made him simply by looking pretty.
His hands began to roam all over your body, stealing a grope of your breast, and his mouth attached to your neck, taking breaks in between kisses to tell you how good you look and how much you riled him up. As good as it all felt, Pieck and Porco were only right down the street, so you took his hands off of your body with promises of making him feel better later in the night once they had left. You’re lucky he doesn’t like quickies like that and prefers to take his time with you or else he would’ve taken you right there up against that counter chile.
Pieck and Porco finally arrive and what was supposed only be one movie turned into two, and now here you were snuggled up under Reiner on a completely different couch than Porco and Pieck while they flipped through a catalogue on the television looking for a new movie to start up; Reiner growing more and more impatient as the minutes went on. The constant caressing on your thigh and pinches he would give your nipples every now and then giving that away completely.
You got tired of fighting his advances off a long time ago and part of you wanted him to continue, to see how far he would actually go, because truth is you wanted him just as much as he wanted you right now. You were just a lot better at hiding it.
It was halfway through the movie that he finally decides to make a drastic move, moving you to a position where your back was pressed against his chest and tapping your hips, signifying for you to raise them so he could pull your shorts down to your thighs.
“Sit still for the rest of the night and I’ll reward us both so good once they leave.” He’d whisper in your ear. The only warning you’d get before he’s slowly easing his cock into you careful not to stretch you out too much, but the wetness that accumulated between your legs all night long makes it so you swallow him completely. A shocked moan leaving both of your lips, but luckily being silenced by the action scene on the tv; both Porco and Pieck too into it to even pay attention to the two of you.
So desperately you wanted to swirl your hips up against you, create any sort of friction to make his cock hit that spot in your soft velvety walls that left you clenching and squealing and him growling into your ears, but instead you had to be as still as possible while cockwarming him. Not being too careful would surely draw the attention of the other two, but Reiner still tested the waters every now and then by shifting every so often on purpose to cause movement.
He was even able to draw a weird moan out of you once that had Porco and Pieck looking over at you like you were crazy, questioning if you were okay which you had no choice but to reply yes to. Barely able to get that out because the feeling of his cock throbbing inside of you mixed with your walls clenching around him was a whole sensation on its own.
“Careful, you don’t want them knowing that I’m balls deep in you right now would you? Or would a slut like you enjoy that; them knowing that your pussy is swallowing my cock whole right now?”
Reiner is degrading during sex sometimes and you cannot tell me otherwise #sorrynotsorry.
And when he said the two of you would be staying like this the whole night until they left he absolutely meant it. After that little moaning incident he surprisingly acted normal the whole night, like the two of you weren’t even doing what you were doing underneath the cover. Knowing how torturous it must be for him to deny you the skin to skin contact and hip bucking you needed from him.
ERWIN SMITH: In a restaurant surrounded by friends
You never thought Erwin to be the bold type to try something out in public with you. The closest thing the two of you have done to it was a quick quickie in his office once with you pressed against the window of the skyscraper building it was located in, but even then you could feel the anxiety in his muscles as he pressed himself up against you; scared of an assistant or important business partner to come barging in on the two of you.
So you can imagine the shock on your face when you were spending the night out with friends at a restaurant, preoccupied with listening to Levi’s horror stories at his tea shop when you felt the ghostly tingles of Erwin’s fingers trail up on your thigh. A hand on your knee was nothing, something he had done plenty of times as a small sign of PDA, but this was different. You looked over to him with a questioned look in your eyes, but his kept his eyes straight and responded to you physically by pressing his thumb against the cloth that separated his finger from your clit.
Almost immediately you choked on the spit going down your throat which garnered the attention from everyone else at the table asking if you were alright. Everyone but Erwin turned to you and if they were truly paying attention that would’ve been a major sign that something was up, but your quick, “I’m okay!” Response had them off your back in an instance and only edged Erwin on more, fingers pushing your panties to the side as he continued on.
The food in front of you hadn’t been touched in around 10 mins since you found yourself full before you were able to finish it all, but you had to pick up your fork and abruptly take a bite of of it when you felt Erwin’s long fingers plunge into you with ease from your wetness and curl up into you; the metal between your teeth the best attempt you had at covering up your moans.
You swear you saw a slight smirk on his lips when you glanced over at him because he’s a menace to society like that.
His hands moved so languidly inside of you hitting all the right spots and pressing down on the sensitive parts of you that always guaranteed a reaction out of you. While also simultaneously still rubbing your clit with his thumb in wide circles, enjoying every twist and turn he saw your face do as you tried desperately to hold your moans in.
At one point, to mess with you even more, he leaned in and whispered into your ear, “You think all these people know that your cunt is clenching around my fingers about to cum?” No one else heard him but you, but it definitely drew the attention of Levi who threw a confused look your way. To which you could only reply to with a smile and awkward chuckle that almost broke out into a moan because Erwin thought it would be a good idea to speed up his fingers.
You didn’t care how obvious it looked anymore, your teeth found comfort in the skin of his arm to stifle moans and your fingers had a death grip on his thighs as your orgasm hit you like a wave. Leaving you with nothing to do but grind your hips down into his fingers slowly to not draw attention as you rode out his orgasm. His fingers were covered in your slick as he pulled them off of you and instead of being discreet and wiping them on his pants or even your dress, he picked up a small dessert off his plate and turned to you. Feeding it to you and sticking his fingers a little too far in your mouth so you can clean your own orgasm off of your fingers. His thumb going between his own lips once he took his fingers out of your mouth and sucking on it gently. “That was delicious.” He would state, never breaking eye contact with you.
The tent in his dressy slacks gave away all the excitement he was feeling on the inside as he watched you squirm in your seat while he did something so naughty to you in public. He couldn’t take it anymore, placing his share of the bill on the table and excusing the both of you for the night before going around and saying your goodbyes. No one seemed to notice anything, except for when you went to Levi to give him a goodbye hug and he whispered in your ear, “Next time get a room or go to the bathroom you freaks.” You totally weren’t embarrassed and didn’t leave the restaurant with warm cheeks.
ZEKE JAEGER: During a zoom meeting
First off, sexy time stuff aside, Zeke is a menace to society and always interrupting your zooms. Whether it’s him barging into the room and asking a question like “Did you eat the last bagel?” While you’re unmuted or walking behind you with his shirt off while you have you camera on. You will never know a peaceful smooth sailing zoom meeting with Zeke in the house.
But you were immune to it at this point and he was a little too immune and comfortable with messing with you while you were in them. But hey, you couldn’t blame him! You looked all too good to him while you laid in the bed on your stomach in one of his band tees and nothing else while you payed attention to the boring lecture happening on your laptop.
Once he realized that your camera was off his hands were on you immediately, rubbing up and down your legs to signify to you that he was in a mood while he made his way on the bed behind you.
“You can’t just be walking around the house all sexy like this and expect me not to pounce on you.”
You want to say something snarky and remarkable back, but a distraction from your boring ass class is exactly what you needed. So instead of protesting this time around, you arched your back so your ass was nearly up to his face to which he replied with playfully slapping you on it and even taking a nibble of your cheek. And because you’re a menace to society you run your own hand along your clothed slit and moving your panties out of the way to put it on display for him.
“I could really use some distracting right now.” Say less, this man’s mouth is on your clit in an instant, devouring you like you’re his first meal of the day. Your hips instinctively grinding down against his tongue as he moved his focus to sucking on your clit at a pace that left you ass up face down on the bed moaning like a pornstar. Never mind his beard scraping against your thighs and possibly leaving a rash there later for you to deal with. It adds a nice touch of pain to your pleasure.
So caught up into the pleasure warming up your lower stomach, you don’t even notice your teacher calling on you until Zeke reaches out and taps on the keyboard to move your attention back to the zoom in front of you, his mouth still working magic on your clit; a mixture of his spit and your juices trailing down his chin. The site is enough to make you cum but you’re forced to divert your eyes away from it as you unmute yourself, quickly asking her to repeat the question, going back on mute before they can hear the slurping noises that Zeke obnoxiously made louder once you unmuted.
“I’m going to kill you.” “Pay attention to school sweetheart before I stop completely. Education comes first!” What an asshole, but despite the joking tone of his voice you know he’d stop in a heartbeat just to mess with you and you’re too close to an orgasm for him to up and quit like that.
From the way your hips move sloppily against his face he can tell that you’re close, but once the teacher repeats the question at you to answer he pulls away completely seemingly to cut you some slack. But, surprise, he only moves his mouth away to replace it with his cock, sliding into you with ease and thrusting into you at a steady pace that has you moan loudly into the microphone on accident.
His face lights up with a smug expression and smile, the embarrassment on your cheeks making him pick up his pace and turning him on in a way. “Now your whole class is going to know that you were getting fucked by me. Too busy getting your hole pounded to even pay attention to the lesion. What a dirty little slut, they’re probably talking about you right now as we speak.”
You’re at a loss of words, not only because of embarrassment but because you can barely form a sentence from the way Zeke is pounding into you so ruthlessly from behind. His hand even coming forward and grabbing at your neck to balance himself against the bed while on his knees.
Your morning with him is far from over and the embarrassment from this zoom is going to last with you forever.
LEVI ACKERMAN:  On an important phone call
I know Levi Ackerman with his hands around our necks really get us going and the thought of dom him fucking us from behind while on the phone with our boss  makes us feel butterflies in our stomachs....BUT the thought of sub Levi whimpering and having to put his phone on mute while discussing business with someone because you have his cock halfway down your throat, is an equally as hot image.
He would glance at you from over his phone and let out a silent “What are you doing?” And make a faint shooing away motion in the air to make you leave, but he doesn’t want you to leave. You know that and he knows that which is why when you went to unbuckle his pants he gladly let you, hips even raising slightly so you can pull them down enough to let his cock and balls free from the restraints of his underwear and pants.
It was such a sudden and rash decision on your end that he wasn’t even hard at all when you pulled him out, but one lick from the base of his cock to the tip of it is enough to make it stand tall. Warranting a deep intake of air that has the person on the other end of the line asking if he was okay. Between the embarrassment from nearly being caught and the pleasure exploding in his lower half from how good you’re working your mouth, his cheeks are flushed with a bright pink color.
“Do you want me to stop” “no, no, keep going, please.”
He’s so needy and close to that sweet release already, the excitement from doing something so naughty while the person on the other end of the phone has no idea has his senses in an overload. Even the broken ‘Y-Yes’s that have to leave his lips every time he unmutes his phone strikes an excited nerve in him that he didn’t know he had; wishing he could moan as freely as he could to show off how good you make him feel, but he bites back those moans with his teeth. Instead opting for a number of praises when he can.
“You look so pretty on your knees in front of me with your cock in my mouth.” “You make me feel so so good, you don’t even know how good I feel right now because of you.” “Keep that up and I’m going to cum.”
Eyes closing shut and breath picking up the closer he gets. His hand even coming down to move your head at a pace that feels godly around his cock.
Usually you would tease and pull away altogether when he did this, reminding him that he couldn’t be too needy, but you would be lying if you said this didn’t have just as much of affect on him as it did on you, thighs clenching together with each bob of your head and moan that left his lips that he couldn’t quite bite back.
He’s an incoherent mess at the end, lips not even able to move together to form sentences and his hips bucking up wildly into your throat to release his load down your throat. His hips still bucking up slightly even after he came because it just felt that good. His mind was so clouded with pleasure that he didn’t even notice the person on the phone had hung up a long time ago, something he would have to deal with later but that proved helpful right now.
“I hope you don’t think that this was it.” Oops, now you awoke the dominant side of Levi’s switch personality and he’s definitely not letting you off the hook for this one.
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monamourbladie-mb · 4 years
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Better?
Anakin Skywalker x reader [SMUT]
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lets... not mention how long i was gone, okay? 😅 i won’t be gone like this again, i promise 🥺 i’ll get right back on requests and such, i just really REALLY struggled on this for some reason... ive got honestly no clue why but eh, here it is. i hope it was worth it! sorry the request took so long anons. 💕 ALSO big shoutout to @anakinswhore for lowkey giving me the inspiration to finish this 🥺 (everytime i almost scrapped this i remembered that my favorite fic writer on tumblr told me i got this, so i knew i couldn’t give up on this :’) thank you so much!
Plot: Anakin gets home from desling with the Bad Batch and is cranky. To help them both unwind, Anakin decides to bring Y/n with him while he showers.
WC: 2.3k
warnings: finger fucking, piv sex, unprotected sex [sorry it’s awkward to write condoms n shit like that— let’s pretend the force works to prevent pregnancy 😭]
Y/n had set down her holo communicator and sighed in frustration, looking at the time.
It was nearing 11 pm, and Anakin had yet to respond to her call. He had promised to call her the moment his mission with the Bad Batch was over, and it was almost 4 hours over the time he had promised.
She grumbled to herself and set it into her desk drawer, standing up and walking to their bedroom. Since it was getting late, she decided to start getting ready for bed. She decided to forego a shower and take it in the morning instead, her exhaustion and worry getting the better of her.
Sliding on her robe, she put her (h/c) hair in a small bun, laying on the bed. She pulled the sheets back and sighed softly as the cold, sheen silk covered her body.
Laying on her side, she did her best to suppress the fears of why Anakin was taking so long to talk to her - trying to stay in a positive mindset. But of course, the turmoil and constant loss from the War made her think differently.
As her mind grew darker, her need for sleep depreciated as she grew more worried. Huffing in frustration when some time had passed and she still hadn’t fallen asleep, she sat up and grumbled to herself.
It wasn’t like she could call Obi-Wan or another member of the council to see if he was alright - it could raise suspicion since, besides working alongside him during some battles, she wasn’t always in contact with him during the War.
Just as she was about to get up to get some water, the door opened and she felt Anakin’s presence through the Force.
She immediately jumped out of bed, retying her robe and rushing out to meet him. “Anakin! Are you okay? It’s so late-“ she began as soon as she saw him.
He sighed snd shut the door, immediately taking off his robe and throwing it over the back of the couch. “I’m sorry,” he said somewhat sternly, sounding exhausted.
“For what, Ani?” she frowned, crossing her arms. “Being late. As always...” he grumbled, walking over to her and kissing her cheek gently. “I didn’t mean to be, the mission went overtime, and we ran into some trouble.”
“Was it successful, at least?”
“Yeah, thankfully. Wasn’t at first, but, we got Echo home safe.”
“So... why do you seem so... down?” she bit her lip, following him into their bedroom.
“I’m exhausted, sweetheart. Completely drained. I’m sorry if I seem off, I was just put under tons of pressure between Rex and Hunter. They got in a big fistfight, and I had to break it up...” Anakin replied, sitting on the bed and sighing, resting his head in his hands.
“Oh, Ani...” she sighed, resting her hand on his shoulder snd rubbing it gently. “I’m sorry, I know the war is hard enough to deal with.”
He shrugged after a moment and grunted, leaning his head back as he sighed. “I think I’m going to take a shower and forget about this God awful day, I’m sorry.”
“That’s fine, I get it. I was planning on taking a shower too, actually, but I might later then.”
Anakin glanced over at her for a moment, sliding his tongue over his lips and letting out a low hum when she doesn’t move, “Aren’t you coming then?”
She raised a brow in confusion, “What? You want me to come with you?”
“You said you wanted to shower, right? Do it with me, no harm in that,” he responded.
She bit her lip, thinking about all the possible endings. She cautiously stood up, walking over to him, “You sure? I can wait, it’s no problem...”
“Y/n,” he said firmly. “What did I say?”
“You said come shower with me,” she repeated. Anakin nodded, “Well, do you want to or not?” he smirked slyly, crossing his arms and watching her curiously.
She took a moment to look up at him, moving up to kiss him gently, “Better get a move on then, you know I prefer it very hot,” she smirked.
He rolled his eyes playfully and deepened the kiss, moving his hands down her back slowly until she pulled away, “Now you’re the one holding us up.”
“Alright, alright, go and get things ready. I’ll be there.” He kissed her forehead gently then pulled away, walking out of the bathroom.
She suppressed a giggle and smile as she skipped to the bathroom, all the thoughts rushing through her mind as she imagined what could happen.
“You’re tired. He’s tired. I’m sure you’re just showering, don’t get your hopes up.”
Boy, that was a lie. She was brushing out her hair and Anakin stormed into the room, pressing her firmly against the counter, crashing his lips onto hers. She gasped into the kiss and dropped the brush onto the counter, gripping onto the counter sides to keep her up-right as he left no room between him, her, and the counter.
Her eyes fluttered close as he cups her cheeks, moving his human hand down the side of her face to her jawline slowly. “Take it all off,” he mumbles, his voice muffled against her soft lips. “I have other things in mind.
She whimpered against his mouth and pulled away for a moment, her chest heaving as she almost was gasping to catch her breath, “What about showering-?”
“Who says we’re not showering?” he smirked, undressing her with his eyes. She swallowed thickly at his gaze and moved to start striping down slowly, keeping eye contact with him.
“Now look at you, all riled up and nervous,” Anakin smirked crossing his arms and watching her.
“Don’t... don’t look at me like that,” she said softly after she got her bra off, her hands starting to tremble from excitement and straight nerves.
“Why not? It’s getting you to tremble, I like it,” his voice gets darker as he moved closer to her, kissing behind her ear. He moved his long fingers over her panties and hooked them in, slowly pushing them down as they fell to her ankles.
She felt shy and exposed as he pulled away to admire his prize, his eyes growing darker as he watched her. He moved his large hands to her smaller waist and pulled her flush against him, keeping his gaze on her face now, “Are you going to get in?”
She nodded, trying to pull away but his grip on her hipbones was too tight. He loosened his grip just enough for her to slink into the warm shower, and he followed suit right after.
He moved his hand to rub her back gently, keeping his ever-darkening gaze transfixed on her smaller body.
She purposefully tried to ignore him, keeping her back turned to his front as she wets her hair under the warm water trickling from the showerhead, trying to occupy her mind with anything but the obvious - she and her lover were showering together.
Anakin trailed his hands lower then moved so his front was placed firmly against her back, kissing the back of her neck, “Don’t ignore me, sweetheart. You’re on edge, let me help you.”
“I don’t know why I’m so nervous, I just,” she turned around and looked up at him and her breath hitched, gripping her hair tighter.
There her lover stood, towering over her with water droplets running down his long darkened brown curly hair onto his toned chest, the small droplets falling down his body over all his muscles.
An involuntary whimper escaped her lips as she shamelessly studied his figure, every inch, every angle... he was just perfect.
“You’re staring,” he smirked, his chuckle low as he pulled her flush against him, looking down at her with dark eyes, “take a picture, it’ll last longer.”
“Oh, shut up,” she said quickly, immediately slamming her lips onto his in a frenzied, heated swift movement. He let out a low growl against her lips in content as he pulled her as close as he could get her. She let out a soft moan into his lips as she felt his hard length press against her, causing her to shudder in anticipation.
“Now you’re needy, what changed, my love?” he pulled away from the intoxicating kiss to kiss and suck across her neck, making her moan softly, “I c-changed my mind,” she stammered, her mind blank and fuzzy with lust as her core began to throb with need.
“I can see that,” his voice was smooth yet deep, knowing he could do the slightest thing and get her riled up even further. He moved his hand and pushed her thigh up near his hip, moving it so he had more room as he danced his thumb over her clit slowly.
Her head fell against his chest and she let out tiny breathy whimpers against his skin, her hips jolting in surprise from the newfound pleasure, “Ani—“
“You’re such a needy little thing, aren’t you? You were acting all innocent earlier, and now that I'm rubbing my fingers all over you you’re a mess,” he clicked his tongue in teasing disapproval as he moved his pointer finger to slide into her heat quickly, alongside his middle finger.
Her eyes widened and she moaned loudly in approval, her heavy breathing against his chest quickening with each ministration.
“Ani, I j-just want you— please—!” she looked up at him with a lusty, needy gaze through her lashes, biting her lip to suppress more moans as he fucked her with his fingers. He grunted in response and curled them against her sweet spot, smirking at her reaction, “Is this what you wanted, sweetheart?”
“N-No—! I want your... i want y-your... fuck, Anakin!” she moaned in response, her hips starting to shake as Anakin knew how close she was already.
He chuckled darkly and leaned against her neck, sucking roughly over her already darkening hickeys as he started pounding his fingers into her harder, rubbing her clit faster, “Use your words, little one, I know you can.”
She threw her head back in ecstasy as she moaned, falling off the edge into bliss as Anakin fucked her through it with his fingers, his eyes wandering across her body now quivering from intense pleasure, water droplets falling from her hair down her breasts.
She went to speak when he silences her with an intoxicatingly passionate kiss, cupping her cheek with his metal hand as he helped her ride her high out, “Good girl...” he mumbled against her lips.
She felt completely out of breath, gripping his bicep for support as he pulled his fingers out of her, using his metallic fingers to brush away some of the wet hair from her face.
He moved her body further from the warm water of the shower so she wouldn’t get water in her eyes as he leaned her against the wall. Keeping his hand firm on her hipbone, he moved her thighs apart gently and began to pump himself slowly, his breathing picking up.
He looked in her eyes and saw an intense lusty gaze he hadn’t seen in them for awhile - and he immediately knew she wanted to continue. He moved his free hand to cup the back of her neck, moving her closer so he can kiss her deeply as he pushed himself into her quickly.
She gasped in surprise against his lips, her eyes fluttering closed as she felt him fill her up completely with one swift thrust.
She arched her back against him, gripping his back weakly as he immediately began rocking his hips into her at an unrelenting pace, grunting in her ear, “So fucking tight for me, angel... And so needy, letting me take you in the shower like this...”
She would never admit verbally just how much she loved his dirty talk, his dirty-natured words sending sparks throughout her pussy and her body as she gripped his hair tightly, “Please, this is all I’ve needed,” she moaned almost out of breath, her heart beating out of her chest as she tightened around him.
His loud growl in response edged her to start to roll her hips against his cock, and he smirked in response, leaning down to kiss across her throat, “So—fucking—tight...” he grunted into her ear, his cheeks burning bright red from the mixture of the hot sex and steamy shower.
Her legs buckled and he immediately gripped her closer to him and the wall, moving her to lean back against it more as he lifts her leg to get a deeper angle, causing her to cry out in ecstasy as the pleasure grew too great.
With her already sensitive, her high build much faster than usual and she gripped his hair tighter, digging her fingernails into the back of his head as she panted, her eyes rolling back, “Anakin—!” she moaned weakly.
He recognized that needy, breathy moan all too well as he knew she was close without her needing to say it. He kisses hot open-mouthed kisses across her throat and collarbone, moaning for her to cum for him as he lazily moved his finger down to rub her through her orgasm; the constant throb of her walls sending him closer to the edge.
She let out a loud breathy moan as her high overtook her, letting out small squeals and moans into his ear as it washed over her. She immediately felt numb as it ran through her, the sight of her moaning and the feeling of her throbbing harder causing him to cum. He leaned his head against hers, moaning shakily as he leaned against the wall to steady himself as he fucked them through it, his metal hand firmly on her hipbone to keep them upright.
Her breathing was shaky and uneven as they came down from their highs, and he kissed her hurriedly and softly, “Better?” she muttered against his lips. Anakin nodded softly and chuckled, pulling out after it had fully faded snd pulling them back under the direct range of the water, “Much, much better.”
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wkemeup · 4 years
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Sunrise (6)
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summary: After an explosion takes his arm and his only sense of belonging, Bucky is content to live out the rest of his days in the hollow comfort of the dark. This is, until Sam drags him down to the local VA and he meets you. (Modern AU) pairings: bucky x reader chapter word count: 6.7k warnings: PTSD, flashbacks/panic attack, a hint into our girl’s past, the sweetest fluff, another book rec 🧡 series masterlist / series playlist
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“So, you really melted ice man's heart, huh?”  
You pouted, throwing Sam a warning glare as you turned back to the stack of books on the cart.  
It had only been a few days since the night on the park bench and you had seen Bucky nearly every evening since. Most of the time you’d find him waiting by the chairs at the entrance to the library for you to get off shift, hair tucked under a baseball cap and hand brushing down at the thigh of his jeans, like maybe he was nervous enough to find the evidence in his palms. He’d brighten up as you spotted him, a lightness coming over his features. You’d lead him down the residential side streets, through canopied trees and flowerbeds along the sidewalk, to spend a few hours at Luciana’s sipping decaf and nibbling through pastries.  
The crowds didn’t bother him as much lately it seemed, or maybe he was getting used to the hustle of rush hour after spending so much time avoiding it. Part of you wondered whether your hand slipping into his and the constant pressure of a slight squeeze had anything to do with it. You wondered if it grounded him like an anchor when his body was eager to float off into space.
He was so impossibly sweet with you; hesitant, like Mrs. Jefferson had said the first day he wandered into the library, but still, there was a lingering charm in it. It sat in the way he looked at you, like he was trying to memorize the lines on your faces, in the way he listened to your long rambles on the latest book you were assigning him, how he had no interest in cutting you off, like maybe he could have listened to you talk for an eternity if you’d let him.  
Bucky Barnes was a little rough on his edges, with some fraying seams and broken pieces, but he was still whole – still complete and wonderful and beautiful. He was soft in his undertones, glimpses of a subtle charm and confidence slipping through the cracks in the small moments when he let his guard down. You didn’t know the Bucky before the war that Sam and Steve spoke so fondly of, but you knew the man he was now and well, this Bucky was everything.  
“He seems like he’s doing better,” Sam said, a little softer this time as he leaned his back to the book shelf. His arms folded over his chest, a smile resembling a sort of pride pushing up at his cheeks. “Took me months to convince him to leave the apartment long enough to check out the VA and you’ve got him down here visiting you almost every day. He’s walking through rush hour just to see you, Y/n. That’s huge for him! Hell, his face might break from how much he’s been smiling lately...”
You laughed, hushing Sam as an elderly woman shot a pointed stare in his direction. Sam held his arms up in defense.  
“He seems happy, Y/n,” Sam finished as you set another book onto the shelf. “Do you get what I’m saying?”
“I get you’re implying that it’s my doing,” you said unconvinced, “but he’s stronger than you give him credit for, Sam. He would have come around on his own. He just needed time. All of you did when you got back. Clearly some more than others. But Bucky... he suffered an immeasurable loss over there. Imagine what that must be like for him to have to readjust to his own body. Of course, he needed time.”
Sam was still smiling at you, nodding along, like maybe you were only proving his point. You believed so strongly in Bucky that it didn’t even cross your mind that maybe it was because of you that he’d started to find himself again. You hadn’t known Bucky when he was holed up in his apartment, shielding himself from the light and drowning in his own anguish. It broke your heart to imagine him sitting alone in a dark, messy apartment, staring at the walls and wishing he were someone else.  
You couldn’t imagine him like that because the man you knew was sweet beyond measure and he made your stomach twist into knots from a simple look across the room. It didn’t seem possible that the light could be drained from the blue of his eyes.  
“I’m not trying to fix him, Sam,” you mumbled under your breath, keeping your eyes trained on the task at hand. “He doesn’t need fixing. I just... I like him and... I like spending time with him. If that means he’s doing better, if he’s starting to look more like the guy you knew, then... that’s good.”
Sam paused, pursing his lips as he studied your face for the subtle reflexes upon your features. You weren’t sure what he was looking for or maybe it was that he was debating whether to argue with you further on the subject, but eventually he resided to concede, letting out a heavy exhale.  
“Just... thank you,” Sam said, relief etched into his voice. “It’s nice having my friend back.”
You looked up at him, a little stunned. “Sam, I haven’t done anything. We haven’t even...um... We aren’t...”
He smiled at you, something genuine, something softer than the cheesy grins you were used to from him. It was a glimpse into who Sam was behind the jokes and the comedic breaks in tension; a man who cared so deeply for the people in his life that he’d cross mountains to see them smile again. He’d come to your aid without so much as a second thought when you’d needed him most, when your world was thrown completely upside down, and here he was again, putting everything he had into making his friend feel whole again.  
Sam put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed. “You’ve done more than you realize.”
You stared at him for a moment, a little lost for words. Could just a few extra days spent wandering around the library, sitting across a café table nursing coffee and scones, and curling up on a park bench have that kind of impact? If you let yourself stop to realize how much brighter your days felt when Bucky was in them, maybe you’d understand what Sam meant.  
“Besides,” Sam shrugged as his smile drifted, “it’s nice to see you happy again, too. Moving on.”
You swallowed and it tasted of bile. The book nearly slipped from your hand.  
Sam chewed on the edge of his lip, a hand swiping over the top of his head. “I know it’s been a few years since we lost—”
“Please— don’t,” you choked out. 
Sam bowed his head, nodding, and you could already feel the swell in your throat. You exhaled a tense breath that struggled to push past your lungs and forced yourself to continue restocking the books, concentrating on the alphabetizing and weathered feel of the covers.
“It’s still hard for me to talk about him, too,” Sam admitted, leaning against the shelf. He shoved his hands into his pockets, a frown pushing on his lips that felt so incredibly unnatural to the man you knew. “But the pain of it doesn’t hurt as much when we have reasons to get up in the morning. Reasons to smile, still. Good things to look forward to.”
You nodded, willing yourself not to cry. It had been so long since you let yourself drift into the memory of the man you’d lost, the name behind the membership card of the loved ones left behind to war heavy in your pocket.  
“All I’m saying is Bucky’s good for you too, kid,” Sam smiled softly nudging you in the shoulder and tickling your sides until a laugh escaped. You clamped a hand down over your mouth as the two of you earned another pointed stare from the elderly woman lurking in the romance section. Sam raised his hands in defense.  
You wiped at your eyes, cheeks burning from grinning. “I could have told you that, you know.”  
“Speak of the devil.” Sam nodded over to the top of the staircase where a man emerged, holding onto the banister; a mop of long brown hair swayed down into his face, a dark green army jacket hung over his shoulders with a sleeve draped down at his left side untouched.
Whatever remained of the lump burning in your throat dissipated, the weight in your pocket feeling a little lighter. A smile grew so wide on your checks you’d nearly forgotten the frown that had ached in the very same muscles just moments earlier.  
“Bucky! What are you doing here?” you laughed as he approached, a little surprised to see him. You nearly wrapped your arms around him before you stopped yourself. You’d only gone as far to hold his hand and you weren’t even sure he’d be comfortable with it given Sam was standing directly on your left.
“Hey,” he replied nervously, pushing a hand through his hair. It looked noticeably softer, a bit of a shine to it, and you wondered if he’d started to care for it again. It was the first time you’d seen him without the baseball cap on. He exchanged a look with Sam before turning back to you. “You said that it got pretty slow on Thursdays and I just wanted to offer you some company but... seems like that’s already covered.”
“Sam can leave!”
Sam pouted dramatically at you as Bucky started to laugh under his breath. It wrinkled up into his eyes and you saw for a moment what Sam had meant; a brightness had returned to the shimmering shades of the open blue skies in his eyes in favor of the muted and darkened ocean waves you’d seen that first day in the VA.
“That hurts, you know,” Sam whined, hand clutching at the fabric on his chest as if he could reach inside and touch his own heart. “We were friends long before this one wandered on scene.”
“Bye Sam,” you sang, waving him off with a nudging on his back. Hands pressed into his shoulder blades, Sam dug his heels into the multicolored carpet under his feet to keep you from pushing him along. You started to laugh loud enough for the woman who scolded Sam earlier to turn in your direction with a scowl upon her face.  
“Alright, alright,” Sam groaned. He stood up straight, brushing you off. “Have fun, kids. Buck, I’ll see you Thursday for the game, right?”
Bucky nodded; hand tucked into his pocket. “Steve’s on nacho duty and we both know he’ll bring enough for twenty people, so you better.”
Sam grinned, pumping his fist in the air. “Exactly what I want to hear.”
“Weren’t you leaving...?” you teased, arms folded over your chest. Sam stuck out his tongue at you and quickly disappeared down the steps. You could hear the rhythmic bounce of his footsteps all the way to the bottom floor. You turned back to Bucky. “So, Thursday night football, huh?”
“Steve started it,” Bucky chuckled, a nervous hand raking through his hair. “They’ve been trying to rope me into game nights since baseball season started. Never had the interest before, I guess.”
That was what Sam was talking about; the small changes in his friend, little pieces of hope embedded into each day, small allowances of motivation and joy. He was finding it again.  
“And now?” you inquired and Bucky shrugged.  
“Sounds like it could be nice. Haven’t watched a game with them like that since before—” He swallowed, eyes darting down. It took a minute, a short breath in and a tense exhale before he cleared his throat and pushed out a smile. “Anyway, how are you? I didn't mean to interrupt if you were hanging out with Wilson, honest.”
“Oh, don’t worry about Sam. He likes the attention too much.” You laughed, stepping a little closer.  
Glancing down at his hand as he held it down by his side – not tucked into his pocket, not curled up in a fist – and you dared to reach for it. You felt the slight twinge of surprise as he jolted under the touch, but relaxed almost instantly as you intertwined your fingers.  
“I’m better now that you’re here,” you said simply, running your free hand soothingly along his arm. It wasn’t unfamiliar contact but it was still new. You could tell it still felt like the first time for him any time you touched him, like he was trying to retrain his body on how to accept touch like this; something gentle and affectionate. You put as much compassion and warmth into each embrace as you could, hoping it might help alleviate some of that anxiety.  
He smiled at you, squeezing your hand in return. “Was kinda hoping you’d say that.”
“Yeah?”  
He nodded, a smile growing on his face as he watched your right hand slide along his arm, running over the bumps in his jacket and feeling for the muscle underneath. If it bothered him, he gave no indication. Instead, he squeezed your hand again, readjusting his fingers, rubbing his thumb sweetly along the back of your hand.  
“Come on,” you nodded, gesturing to the book shelf behind you. “I’ve got more books to put away and I could use some of that company you promised.”
***
Three hours later and Bucky was sitting on one of the beanbags in the Children’s Corner, reading the latest book on a seemingly never-ending list you’d assigned for him: The Silver Linings Playbook by Mathew Quick – the story of a man determined to find the good in the bad as he navigates an evenly matched chaotic love interest, the approval of a strict, suburban Philadelphian family, and an undying loyalty to Eagles’ football.
After Bucky had helped place a few of the novels on the tallest shelves, you insisted you weren’t intent to put him to work and pushed him onto the beanbag chair. Most of the time he pretended to read while he watched you weave around the aisles. Always bright when patrons approached and sneaking a few lines of narrative from each book as you placed it on the shelf, as if you could capture a glimpse of each story and hold it for later.  
You were never more than a few aisles away and he caught you peering over at him every so often, just checking to make sure he was still there. He winked at you as you caught his eye and a laugh would escape passed your lips despite your effort to hide it before you disappeared back to your task.  
He was nearly halfway through the book, using the same clip you’d given him the first day of book club, when he heard the small voice of a child clear their throat.  
A girl, no older than eight, stood behind you as you stocked one of the children’s shelves. She tapped on your spine and backed up a few paces, holding her hands tightly in front of her.
Bucky couldn’t quite make out what she was saying, but you knelt down to her level – the same as you’d done for the boy in the café – and nodded intently to what she was saying. Then, after scratching at your head, scrunching up your face in thought, you brought the girl over to a different aisle and pulled out a book for her.  
She glanced over the cover for only a few seconds before she tugged the book tight to her chest and squealed. She thanked you quickly with an enthusiastic wave before she rushed off to a couple standing by the elevator. She wrapped her arms around her father’s legs, excitedly showing her mother the book you’d selected for her.  
But Bucky couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from you. You stood from your place in the aisle as you watched the interaction between the girl and her parents; how the father patted her on the head and ruffled up her hair, much to the child’s infectious delight, how the mother picked up the book and raised an eyebrow, intrigued.
Your hands were crossed over your heart, a smile brimming bright on your face. Bucky couldn’t imagine how anyone had come to be as genuine and warm as you were; filled with an unending compassion for others beyond anything he’d ever seen before and a love in the simplicity of kindness. When you looked back over at him, he could hardly catch his breath.  
“Hey,” you called sweetly, skipping up to him. The sleeves of a golden yellow sweater hung past your fingertips and you curled the excess fabric into your palms.  “My shift’s over in a few minutes.”
Bucky blinked a few times, pulling himself from his stare before he glanced over at the clocking hanging high above the books. “Wow. That went fast.”
You nodded, swaying on your heels.  
“Luciana’s?” you asked as you bit down on your lip, that nervous kind of look about you like you might actually believe he’d ever turn down more time with you.  
Bucky exhaled a breath of relief, closing the book in his lap. “Yeah, that sounds good.”
“Come on,” you grinned, extending your hand to him.  
You took the book first, placing it into the small bag draped over your shoulder, and slipped your hand into his. Bucky let you tug him up to his feet, though he didn’t need the help despite the sinking feeling of the bean bag chair numbing his legs. He liked the feeling of your hand wrapped tightly in his own and he liked it even more so when you didn’t let go.  
“Heading out, dear?” Mrs. Jefferson called by the front desk as you passed by. She ran her eyes over Bucky, that signature smirk present upon her lips, though you didn’t seem to notice. She winked at him and he felt the tips of his ears burn red.  
“Yes, ma’am! I’ll see you tomorrow,” you replied, waving her off as you pulled Bucky to the doors.  
It was warmer outside than he was expecting, with children running down the sidewalk and tourists in matching t-shirts chasing on their heels. They carried pinwheels in their hands and bags of popcorn as if they’d been by a carnival – which seemed odd in the middle of Brooklyn. Another family across the street pushed a small child in a stroller with paint on her face in the shape of rainbows and a bag of cotton candy curled up tight in her hand.  
Bucky narrowed his eyes, confused.  
“I love this time of year,” you sighed, leaning your head to his shoulder as you walked. “Look at the sky. It’s beautiful.”
The sun was beginning its decent beyond the horizon, the dark cast of a night sky peering over the light blues as they faded into reds and oranges and a distant glimpse of purple. The stars had begun to peak through the clouds.
“Forgot how dark it can get,” Bucky said as you guided him back to the residential streets.  
You shrugged. “Earlier sunset though. Makes for a nicer walk after my shift.”
Bucky smiled at that. You always managed to find the silver lings in every cloud, no matter how dark or grey or filled with rain – you found the good. He wondered for a moment, if you could manage to do the same in him, too.  
“It was nice of you to come by today,” you said. You nudged his hip as you adjusted your hold on his hand with a gentle squeeze. When he looked down at you, you were smiling at him.
“Just like spending time with you.” Bucky shrugged, trying to play it off casually, though his heart was racing. You nodded slowly, the smile growing even wider on your face, though you didn’t say anything.  
The sidewalks were empty on this part of the walk and while a silence had taken over between you, it was comfortable, like the wrap of a warm blanket. Your hand still tucked into his, a gentle squeeze now and then to remind him you were there, a soft humming under your breath. There was a sense of peace in it, a safety he hadn’t known in a very long time.  
The quiet had been his enemy for so long. He’d done everything he could to avoid it; favoring instead the white noise of a broken satellite channel, the clanging of the radiator he’d never fixed, the static of an empty radio station. The quiet allowed too many memories to come through, memories he would have rather left behind when he boarded that plane for the last time. The quiet mocked him and pushed him so far inside himself, he was underwater.  
But now—now there was a kindness in it. The quiet granted him the moments to listen for the gentle rise of your breaths and the hum in your voice. It allowed him a chance to focus on the click of your boots to the sidewalk and the way you said his name like he was something to behold. The silence gave him you.  
And it was ripped away in an instant.
He felt the vibration of it, felt the rumble in his chest and the skip in his heart, before he ever heard the thunderous echo of the explosion.  
No time to react, Bucky shoved you to the ground, throwing his body on top of yours, his arm casting up to shield your face. He couldn’t feel the heat of the fire, but he knew it must be close.  
“Bucky!” you called, frantic, but your voice sounded too far away. His ears were ringing, his heart pounding so loudly he wondered if it could jump straight out from his chest, if it would spill broken and bloody onto your sweater below.  
You called his name again, trying to grab his attention, but it was muffled, like you were calling to him from beneath an ocean.  
He dared a glance back over his shoulder, searching for enemy soldiers, IEDs, tanks, trunks, anything, but he was only met with empty streets, autumn-colored leaves, and brick buildings when he was sure all he would find was dirt and desert.  
Something was wrong.
“Bucky, you’re alright. You’re safe. Focus on my voice,” you called to him again and he felt the touch of something cold on his face. Your hands. Cupping at his cheeks, your thumbs brushing gently over the rush of heat on his skin. He stared down at you, breathing heavy, but you were steady, calm. “Bucky, breathe for me. Come on.”
You took in a deep breath, urging him to follow.  
But no—he didn’t have time. He had to get you to safety. He had to get you out of the line of fire before—
Another explosion.
He flinched as it erupted, wrapping himself tighter around you, caging you down against the sidewalk in an effort to take the brunt of debris though he felt nothing on his back. You groaned underneath him, a slight pain in your voice.
“Bucky, honey.” Your voice was miles away. He could only hear the last remaining remnants of an echo at the end of a tunnel. Your hands pressed against his face again, urging him to look at you. Your eyes were wide as you searched his, full of concern and maybe even sadness, but no fear. Why was there no fear?
“Look up for me,” you told him gently, gesturing to the sky. “You’re safe, Bucky. It’s only fireworks. Look.”
Bucky kept his focus on you. His vision was blurry, a painful ringing piercing in his ears. When you looked up at the sky, tenderly tilting his head to follow, he saw the trail of illuminated sparks against the backdrop of the setting sun as it raced into the sky.  
Then – the explosion.
He still recoiled at the sound as it erupted into his chest, but he kept his eyes focused on the stream of red and gold as it fluttered against the backdrop of deep navies and the peppered brush strokes of fading purples along the horizon, the smoke disappearing in ghosted shadows against the clouds. His lips parted in shock, his breaths coming in a little quicker.  
“No, I... I thought... I was so sure it...” He couldn’t finish a sentence, his mind racing faster than he could speak. He shook his head, staring up at the outlines of the firework long after it faded, the wind carrying it away. It felt so real.  
“Let’s get out of the street, okay?” you soothed, drawing your fingers down his cheeks, smiling encouragingly at him. He nodded, feeling a bit out of it, like maybe he was in some sort of trance.
But then, it happened again.
The firework exploded high into the air and Bucky pressed his face to the crook of your neck, drawing you in as close as he could manage. He was shaking as you ran your hand along his spine.
“It’s okay, honey. I’ve got you.” Your voice was the only thing keeping him from disappearing inside himself entirely. He focused on the imprint of your hand on his back, the feel of your fingertips as you traced the lines on his face. He concentrated on the heat in your breath as it touched his cheeks and the pressed of your body under his.  
“I live close by,” you told him, gesturing to a street off the corner. “Let’s go now, alright? Before the next one goes off.”
Bucky nodded quickly, too lost within his own head to feel the rush of embarrassment seeping into his features. His felt nauseous, his arm shaking, his legs weak and numb as he slowly backed off of you.  
As you began to stand, he noticed the tiny rocks embedded into your clothing when they fell down to the sidewalk, bouncing against the concrete by your feet. There were scrapes on your elbows and a tear in your sweater.
“Come on,” you called to him, extending your hand, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the patch of red on your skin.  
But then he spotted another stream of light flying high into the sky and he reached for your hand, gripping it tight before the firework went off. Even prepared, it made him stumble on his feet as it echoed down into the empty streets.  
“Focus on this, alright? Focus on what you can feel,” you said, squeezing his hand tight in your own. You picked up the pace as you guided him a few blocks away from Luciana’s, further into the residential streets.
If Bucky had been in his right state of mind, he would have thought it was rather pretty; the way the sunset cast a stunning illuminated glow onto the faded brick and the pots of flowers hanging from the windowsills. The fireworks lighting up the darkest parts of the sky in effervescent colors.  
You were beautiful as you tugged him along – hair a little misplaced, leaves trapped in the fabric of your sweater, cautious looks back in his direction as you pulled him by his hand. So beautiful, it kept his focus as another firework went off and he felt the hardened pressure of your grip.
“Go on inside,” you instructed, and Bucky realized he was standing at the door to an apartment – your apartment. He didn’t even realize he’d walked up a flight of stairs and crossed inside a building.  
You were staring at him when he looked at you again and it was only then he saw an ounce of fear in your eyes. You squeezed his hand. “Come on now, honey. Please?”
Bucky swallowed, nodding as he stepped inside. He tried to look around, wanted to know the sort of things you kept around your apartment; if it was littered in as many books as you carried in your bag or if it had the warm tones of the colors you wore in your clothing decorated around your living room. He wanted to look at old pictures on the wall and the stand of DVDs you held onto, even without a workable DVD player, as they piled by the television. He wanted to know so much more about you.
Even in the distance, through the walls and the locked windows, he heard the firework erupt into the sky, the flash of it echoing into your apartment and lighting up the living room, and his whole body winced.  
“Couch,” you told him, quickly kicking your shoes to the mat and shrugging off your jacket. You grabbed a book from your bag and tossed it onto the coffee table. When Bucky didn’t so much as move, you took careful steps closer to him and stilled.
“Do you know where you are?” you asked cautiously, almost instinctively, like maybe you’d done that before.  
Bucky swallowed, though it tasted of bile. He nodded.
You bent down to untie his boots. He stepped out when you asked him to, the slight chill of your fingertips against his ankles as you removed the shoes. Then, you grabbed his hand and led him to the couch.
You laid down with your back pressed against the arm rest, one leg draped down along the back cushions, the other hung over the side. You gestured for him to follow, patting at the space of the couch between your legs.  
“I...” Bucky started, finding the words lost on his tongue. He knew it would help. The pressure, the feel of you to ground him back to reality, to keep his mind from the memories swarming back to the surface, but all he could feel was the emptiness on his left, the shame of a missing piece and he couldn’t stand for you to feel it, too.
“Bucky, please,” you urged. “Let me help you.”
The echo of another firework broke into the sky, the light illuminating your apartment, and despite Bucky’s best efforts, his body flinched.  
He clenched his jaw, desperately trying to keep himself in the present moment, to focus on you and the distant scent of a pine candle on the coffee table, but all he could see was a rush of wind, sand in his eyes from the storm, the laughter of a kid far too young to be carrying a weapon of that size, the low hum of a jeep, a reflection over a hillside, someone screaming, his throat raw and burning and—and—and—
“Bucky? Are you—”
He crawled down onto the couch, sinking you into the cushions and resting the full of his body weight against you. He set his head against your chest; his ear pressed to your heartbeat so he could hear the steady thumping inside, the rise and fall of each breath. His right arm snaked up around your shoulder blades, tucking his hand against you like he was cradling a pillow.  
You were incredibly still for a moment, stunned that he gave in, but then he felt you relax under him. A hum nestled in your chest as you slid a hand along his spine, drawing lines and circles to ease the tension in his muscles. The other swept against his hair, pushing it from his eyes, raking into his scalp.  
You laid there with him like that for a moment, soothing your hands along the tension in his body and humming soft melodies under your breath to distract him from the fireworks as they lit up the night sky. He still flinched, but he recovered quicker, focusing on the steady beat of your heart under his ear and the movement of your hands on his spine.  
He felt something warm touch other the crown of his head, a shaken breath brushing over his hair. Then, the book from the coffee table made its way into your right hand, the clip you’d given him on the first day of book club, affixed to the last page he’d read in the library that day. Resting the binding on his shoulder, you began to read.  
“’When I read the actual story- how Gatsby loves Daisy so much but can't ever be with her no matter how hard he tries- I feel like ripping the book in half and calling up Fitzgerald and telling him his book is all wrong, even though I know Fitzgerald is probably deceased,’” you started, a soft smile evident in your voice. “’Especially when Gatsby is shot dead in his swimming pool the first time he goes for a swim all summer, Daisy doesn't even go to his funeral, Nick and Jordan part ways, and Daisy ends up sticking with racist Tom, whose need for sex basically murders an innocent woman, you can tell Fitzgerald never took the time to look up at clouds during sunset, because there's no silver lining at the end of that book, let me tell you.’”
Bucky sighed, sinking further into your embrace. He didn’t even notice as the final firework took its bow amongst the stars or the burst of applause in the distance, too focused on the gentle vibrations in your voice, the smell of an old book as you flipped through the pages, stealing glances up at your face as you smiled with every word.  
When you finished the chapter, you closed the book and set it gently upon the table. Your hands returned to his hair, carding through it and drawing a hum from his lips.
“You alright?”
Bucky nodded, feeling a little dizzy. He certainly felt alright enough for the numbness to wash away and a steady stream of shame and humiliation to rush in and take its place. Slowly, he lifted himself from your embrace, crawling back against the couch and sitting on the edge of the cushions. You followed him, scooting up against his side.
“I’m sorry.”
Your shoulders sank. “Bucky, please, don’t apologize for—”
“You shouldn’t have to deal with this stuff, Y/n,” Bucky sighed, pinching at the bridge of his nose. Bile was etching its way up his throat. He’d never felt so helpless, so small, so vulnerable as if he were no more than a child. He was dead weight on your shoulders. He couldn’t put that on you, he couldn’t let you carry the burden he’d become.  
“What if I want to?”  
He dropped his hand, looking over at you to find you watching him with that same desperation he’d felt to keep you safe when he’d heard IEDs exploding in downtown Brooklyn just moments before. You reached out for his hand, putting it gently into your lap when you were met without resistance and began to trace over the lines in his palm.  
“What if all I want to do is be with you? What if it’s all I can think about?” you continued, a low ache in your voice he didn’t expect. You lifted his hand to your lips, pressing a kiss to the knuckles and drawing a shuttering breath from his lungs. “I’d hold you for an eternity if that was what you needed.”
Bucky stared at you in stunned silence. He was a mess, barely stable and breaking apart at the seams and... and here you were, willing to stitch him together with needle and string. You saw a mosaic when all he could see were broken pieces. His lips parted to speak, but nothing came out.  
Instead, your hand made its way to his cheek, cupping at the side of his face. Your eyes softened, flickering down to his lips, the touch of your fingertips grazing over his jawline and along his neck like maybe you could feel every pulse of his heartbeat.  
Could you feel his fears, too? The ones that warned him that you wouldn’t like the broken, disfigured fragments he’d become? Could you tell that he was sitting on the edge of a waterfall with the rush of water under his legs, just waiting to be pushed off the ledge? Did you know it was your hand on his shoulder pulling him back to the shore?
He leaned in closer, testing his courage, until his nose brushed against yours. So impossibly close, the heat of your breath warm against his skin. You stayed there for a moment, waiting, foreheads pressed together, until Bucky dared to close the space between.  
Chaste and honest. Slow and aching. He kissed you and the first touch left him breathless, shaken as he drew in an inhale. You pulled him closer, hands wrapped tenderly on the sides of his face and he could feel your lips curve up into a smile as he turned toward you, wrapping his arm around your waist to hold you closer.
God, he’d never wished more for his left arm to find its way back to his body than he did in that moment. He just wanted to feel you in every way he could, to wrap himself around you in his entirety, to hold you the way a woman should be held.  
You pulled back suddenly, laughing under your breath, and he realized your phone was buzzing on the table. You didn’t move for a second, just staring at him, trying to contain your laughter, and he found himself smiling so wide, it reached his eyes. His cheeks ached a little, too.  
He realized it the moment you reached out and wiped your thumb over his lips, how you handled him with such intricacy and care, how you touched him like he was made of worth, how you looked at him like he was something to adore – he was in love with you.  
You lunged for your phone, still smiling as you brought it to your ear. “Hey Nat, I’m kinda busy right— Oh.” Your face fell. “Are you alright?”  
Bucky narrowed his eyes, his hand setting on your knee to give it a slight squeeze.  
“Yeah, yeah, of course,” you said into the phone, pressing your lips into an apologetic line. “I’ll be right there.”
“Everything okay?” Bucky asked as you hung up the phone. You nodded, reaching back out for him and your hand found its way to the side of his face. You held it there, thumb brushing along his cheekbone fondly before you leaned in and pressed slow, brief kiss against his lips – something so casual, so intimate, as if you’d done it a thousand times before. He wished you’d do it a thousand more.  
“I’m so sorry, but... I have to go,” you sighed, a frown pushing down at the corners of your mouth. “Please believe that I’d stay if it was anyone other than Natasha... Something happened at her job and I—”
“No apologies, right?” Bucky eased, resolving your guilt before you even had a chance to allow it to rise to full display. “You don’t have to explain yourself. It’s okay. I’m okay.”
“You’re sure?” You weren’t convinced, but he could tell from the hope in your eyes that you wanted it to be true.  
“Yes,” Bucky replied sincerely. With the fireworks long faded into the night sky and the gentle chirp of crickets beyond your window, the only remaining cause of his racing heartbeat belonged to the woman sitting beside him, the casual touch of your hand against his face. He turned to kiss at the inside of your palm before he lowered your hand into your lap.  
“You could stay here, if you want,” you offered nervously, glancing out to the window half wondering if a new set of fireworks would begin to light against the pitch black of the sky.  
Bucky shook his head, though he smiled for you. “I should head home anyway. I’ve got a book to finish.”  
He reached for The Silver Linings Playbook and held it up in his hand. He had a hard time letting his own smile fall with the way you were looking at him and he tucked the book against his chest as if it could feel his heartbeat. He wondered if you picked this particular book for him in hopes he might start seeing silver linings the way Pat did along the pages of the novel— how you seemed to, as well.  
If anything, you might be his very own silver lining.  
“Come on,” Bucky said, standing from the couch and extending a hand to you. “I’ll walk you there.”
You bit on the edge of your smile in an effort to contain it. It did no use and for that, Bucky was thankful.
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missallsundaes · 3 years
Text
Sanji x Male Reader — Amateur Chef
2111 Words • CW dealing with repressed bisexuality
When Luffy heard your self proclaimed cooking skills in the town market to a friend, he immediately invited you on to the ship, even without trying your food. A bigger crew needs more cooks, was his reasoning for Sanji. Sanji wasn't exactly happy about the new addition to his kitchen, possessive about his things and how the kitchen was maintained. And he was sure that you wouldn't take the same care as he did. At least you had your own set of knives, he thought with a sigh.
The first night cooking together proved to be...a challenge. He was paying you no mind, working in his own entrees for the crew, but the haphazard slap of the kitchen knife against the chopping board, well he could only stand it for so long before his temper got the better of him.
“What the fuck are you doing over there, amateur?” He seethed, turning to face you.
You sheepishly set down your knife on the counter, stepping back to show Sanji the vegetables you were cutting. His heart skipped a beat, seeing your rough cut shapes and uneven chops.
“What are you doing to that poor food!” Worded like a question, but spat at you like an insult. He approached you cutting board, staring down at the mangled shapes of potato, carrot and celery, hand frustratingly pulling through his hair.
“Well I'm just making soup..” You started, you were a bit offended but the chef in front of you was too intimating to talk back to. You'd heard enough stories about Black Leg Sanji to know when to keep your mouth shut.
“So you decided to torture your poor ingredients?” He reached for his own knife, wiping it clean with a cloth before trying to salvage the vegetables. You watched in awe as he saved first the potatoes, then the celery. He looked at you before touching the chunks of carrot on the board.
“You taking notes, amateur?” He said. His voice was softer now though his tone was still harsh. He raised the visible eyebrow, “Come over here and learn how it's done.”
He waved you over to stand in front of him, placing his hand over yours on your knife, he guided your left hand into place, showing you the gentle fist to protect your fingers without losing grip on the vegetables. He started slow, chopping motions in cool even bursts, slicing the chunks of carrot into perfectly measured cubes. You tried to pay attention but the beating of your heart in your throat, his warm hand over yours, and his firm chest placed against your back was all that your mind could focus on.
When the carrot was taken care of he let go of your hand, leaving you feeling you were missing something. You watched him cross the kitchen again, standing again in front of his own prep, you watched him skillfully pull the bones from a huge fish in one movement, running his hand over it to make sure it was all removed, looking for even the smallest of bones.
You hadn't heard about how gentle he was. How careful in the kitchen with perfect mannerisms. He looked at you, and you realized how obviously caught up in watching him you were, jumping to peel the garlic in front of you for your soup. He laughed, turning back to his prep, beginning to make a marinade with fresh lemons and cracked pepper for the fish.
“You're not a chef are you?” He said, looking at you briefly as he squeezed the lemons of their juice.
“No not at all,” you said sheepishly, ”I know a few recipes but when a wanted pirate grabs you and tells you you're going to be a chef on his crew you listen, you know? It's not like I was in a position to refuse..”
He sighed, knowing exactly how enthusiastic Luffy could be when he set his mind on something. “Don't worry, you can be my sous chef. I'll teach you what you need to know. We'll start with more knife practice for breakfast tomorrow, I hope you're okay getting up early.”
You thought briefly of how much you were not a morning person, though this was not the time to mention that. You nodded, “Thanks for helping me. You're a kind man.”
Sanji's face flushed at the genuine compliment, turning around quickly as if there was a pressing matter in the fridge to attend to. “N-nonsense it's just the right thing to do.” He stammered, head buried in the fridge, looking desperately for an ingredient to pull out that would make sense.
///
He kicked your hammock in the men's cabin, foot still perched on your side as you swayed back and forth, trying to regain your senses, shaken from a dream about your new crewmates, the one in front of you in particular.
“I thought you could be up early,” he laughed.
The room was still full of the snoring of the other men, the only light from the lantern in Sanji’s hand, casting golden light across him. He was already dressed in his slacks and dress shirt, looking primed for the day. You were sure that you looked the absolute opposite, feeling the drool caked to your cheek and knowing your hair was probably a wreck.
“Uh, about that,” you chuckled, climbing out of the hammock and hopping to the floor of the cabin. “I may not be as much of a morning person as I said.”
“I figured as much when you didn't wake up the first few times I kicked you.” He said, “Though I bothered you enough for you to say my name in your sleep.”
You turned from him, hiding your face by searching for a clean set of clothes, forcing an awkward laugh, “Oh yeah I must have subconsciously known you were trying to wake me.”
“Well hurry up, these idiots won't be asleep forever, and you do not want to see Luffy without his breakfast.” He left the room for you to get dressed, and you trudged to the bathroom to get ready for the day.
When you met him in the kitchen, he had a multitude of fruits set up at your station. You could smell bacon in the oven already, and he was whipping a large bowl of eggs for what you could only imagine was the biggest omelette of all time.
“Took you long enough.” He said, though he had a smirk on his face, his harsh attitude from yesterday softened.
“Am I chopping these?” You said, lifting your knife to slice the strawberries laid out on the board.
“Ah ah wait. Hold on I'm almost done.” He said, setting down the bowl of whipped eggs on the counter. He approached you, watching over your shoulder. “Do you remember the lesson from yesterday?”
You nodded, ”I think so.” you put your hand in the position he showed you, holding the knife how it felt under his guiding hand, breathed in and started slicing the strawberries.
The difference in your cuts from yesterday to this morning was leagues away. He adjusted your elbow, his firm gentle touch making your heart flutter, and just the adjustment of your arm made your slices neater. “Breathe,” he said, his own breath hot in your ear and making you catch your breath instead. You struggled to retain your breathing, but your cuts were messier now. He took your hand again, your heart beating through your chest. “You're making this so much harder than it is, watch. Breath with me.”
You times your breathing to match his, his firm chest pressed into you, his hand over yours. You felt your chests rise in succession together, making you feel as one. His hand held yours in place, but you were doing the work.
“Exactly like that,” he praised, you felt like you could melt right then and there. “You're doing great.”
He let go of you, stepping back to the stove top to heat a huge skillet for his omelette. “You've got it from here I presume.” You watched him for a moment, testing the temperature of the pan before adding his eggs and watching them diligently. “Most of breakfast is ready, so just get the fruit cut and plated and then we can wake up the crew.”
You nodded, “Thanks again, Sanji.” You said, continuing to chop the fruit in front of you, plating it up on the large platter he had set out.
///
The next few weekswent the same, Sanji waking you in the morning. Him teaching you new techniques to use in the kitchen. Making three meals a day together, not including if someone wanted a snack, getting closer and closer until you couldn't bear it. Your feelings for the man were definitely growing, you had a sneaking suspicion that he had similar feelings for you, but the constant doting of the girls on the crew made you doubt yourself, fearing that he wasn't into men the way you were.
You had already made fresh baked bread together that morning, as you watched his hands knead the dough tauntingly slow, his strong hands rolling it out and beating it down, his sleeves rolled up you could see the flexing of every muscle in his forearms.
You were cracking about two dozen eggs into a large skillet to fry, trying not to think about how close he was to you, chopping chives to put on top of your fried eggs.
“Sanji,” you said, rinsing your hands of the raw eggs in the sink.
He didn't look up from his work, now slicing pieces of smoked salmon, “Eh?” He said.
“I think I might have a problem,” you said, trying desperately not to look at the blond sharing the kitchen with you. He set down his knife, immediately checking your eggs over, the stove temperature, any kitchen error he could think of before looking you incredulously in the face. “It's not my food.” He looked more relieved than you expected and you laughed.
“What is it then?” He said, curly brow peaked with curiosity.
“I think I fell for one of my crewmates since I've been on the ship.” You flipped your eggs carefully, trying not to break your yolks.
“Oh? Nami? Robin?” He said, going back to work at his salmon. He wasn't jealous, per say, it's not like he really expect to feel this way about you. Plus the girls were gorgeous in every way, how could a red blooded man not fall for them. He still didn't know how to accept his feelings for you, forcing down any hint of bisexuality that he ever felt, blocking out those feelings, usually with anger.
“Uh no,” you said, turning off the heat on the stove and letting the residual heat finish your eggs as you seasoned them with salt and pepper. Beginning to set up the crews plates with thick slices of your fresh bread, two eggs each (four for Luffy and Zoro), sprinkling the chives on top, and passing the plates to Sanji to top with smoked salmon and hollandaise sauce.
After a moment of silence so thick you could slice it with the kitchen knife next to you, you continued, “Sanji, it's you.”
He almost dropped the plate he was holding, and you both moved quickly in reaction, hands one on top of the other under the plate. “What,” he said, worded like a question but tone flat in disbelief.
“Just, spending all this time with you has meant so much to me,” you withdrew your hand, looking away from him to hide the tinge of crimson on your cheeks. “Having you close to me, your guiding hands. Your strength. I can't help it.” He was still frozen in place, thoughts racing. “Just don't worry. Never mind, forget I said anything!” You said, plating the last of your half of the plates.
“Wait,” he said, as you were leaving the galley to wake the crew, “I think I fell for you too.” You stopped in the doorway, turning back to face him, but his back was to you. “I grew up not allowed to be who I wanted and even though I can now it's still hard to accept who I am. But I want to learn and be better. I want to be with you.”
“Do you mean that?” You said, letting the door swing back closed.
“Yeah,” he laughed, he turned to you smiling with tears in the corners of his eye. “Yeah I definitely mean it.” He wiped his eye, “Come on then, let's go wake up the ravenous beasts.”
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sorryimanon · 4 years
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Pairings: Bakugou x fem!Reader
Tags: 18+, dirty talk, explicit scenes, mutual masturbation, penetration, bakugou being a switch, reader is a dom, lots of back and forth between characters, slow burn
A/N: this was supposed to be divided into two parts but surprise, surprise! i got lazy :) i had so much writing this. this might be my favorite fic ive written so far! this is a loooong one. enjoy! 
P.S this is the unedited ver. I will posting the final on my AO3 account (sorryimanon)
-
Katsuki disliked her. No, he absolutely loathed her. Ever since she stepped foot into the classroom, it was destined for there to be a hostile barrier between the two of them. Granted, all she did was sweetly greet him like the rest of her fellow classmates, but Katsuki completely saw through her fading facade and ignored the kind gesture with a threatening showcase of his quirk.
"Being nice won't get you anywhere, baka," he snarled, glaring intensely at her all the while everyone watched the whole scene unfold.
He treated her like a foolish peasant after that initial encounter, disregarding her in any way shape or form as disgust shone through his eyes.
Y/N persevered the oncoming school years despite the blonde breathing down her neck consistently everyday. Katsuki's aggressive nature towards her subsided once graduation commenced, alluding to the blossoming maturity each student should have endured before branching off into hero work.
Not long after the celebratory succession, y/n bounced to several agencies that offered the same beneficial agreements for her. None caught her attention. Until one day she received a recommendation from Endeavor himself to work full time at his agency. Of course she accepted it and immediately wrote her sloppy signature down on the contract. Unbeknownst to her excitement, a separate copy of the contract was sent to another uprising hero around her age group.
So when she strutted in that morning of orientation, she never expected to see the very infamous Katsuki Bakugou slouched on one of the many chairs in the meeting room. Her throat tightened as she took a seat next to him, his height still freakishly tall even when they were just sitting. Staring straight forward to prevent from any means of eye contact with him, he lowered his head at her eye level and crooked a half smile.
"I'm gonna make you regret for even considering joining here, extra." A fleck of his spit hit the side of her face. Learning from her past encounters with Katsuki, y/n held her tongue in hopes for him to feel satisfied enough to leave her alone.
Thankfully their office hours were inconsistent to where they didn't intervene with each other, neither of them awkwardly meeting in the lobby or an elevator. However, sometimes y/n and Bakugou would desire the same craving for a caffeinated beverage and find themselves standing shoulder to shoulder by the coffee machine.
Bakugou likes his coffee black, she mentally jotted down as she intently watched his usual routine of preparing the beverage.
Like the asshole he is, Bakugou would purposely tip the mug and let a few trickles of the hot liquid burn her hand. He's done this every single time before he leaves y/n alone in the break room. Deep down, he relishes in the strained expression on her face when he inflicts the pain upon her. Thoughts danced across his head. Some involving him blasting y/n into the stratosphere to her kissing the tips of his boots for mercy. Either way, her being so submissive and, dare he say, a pussy to stand her ground sufficed him enough for the time being. But sometimes it pissed him off.
The constant harassment by the angry blonde went unnoticed by their other colleagues, including Endeavor, leaving y/n to prepare every morning to face the wrath of Katsuki Bakugou. His verbal abuse never wavered, occasionally whispering under his breath "weakling" or "stupid girl" whenever the pair were in the same room together. One time he sent her on a wild goose chase to find a missing case file that miraculously disappeared from her desk while she was copying something in the other room. Hours later, she soon discovers the said file tucked behind Katsuki's arm, snatching it from his grip and not once reprimanding him for wasting her time. Y/N eventually got used to it. Adapting to the annual insults of her work ethics and anything he could muster up from his sleeve. Both finally accepted their twisted dynamic, and became accustomed to the work lifestyle.
Months later, the dynamic soon changed when Endeavor announced an emergency meeting with everyone in the building. Apparently a new wave of villains have been reigning terror over the city, causing major damages and fatalities in a matter of weeks. Rumors started to circulate that the new generation of heroes don't have the capabilities to apprehend this group of evil doers. In the meeting, Endeavor made it clear for everyone to be partnered up before he dismisses them to patrol for the night, suggesting that pairing up with someone who is complimentary to your quirk is efficient for when dealing with these kinds of villains.
That's why y/n didn't voice her complaint when she inevitably got matched with Bakugou. His quirk alone was powerful already. With both of their quirks combined, there's no telling how the mission will go, but she surprisingly feels safe knowing he'll be sticking by her side throughout the rest of the night. It'll be a quick mission, then they'll return back to their previous mundane duties in the office. Back to Katsuki's mental and verbal torment.
"Could you move any slower?" Katsuki barked as both he and y/n were taking a quick stroll through the public park, scoping out for any signs of danger.
She was a step behind him, careful not to bump his shoulder or invade his space. She mumbled out a quick apology and fastened her pace, catching up to the man in gear. Tonight he wore his alternative hero costume, the design made specifically for when the temperature reaches an undesirable degree. The collar touched below the tip of his chin, his chiseled chest covered with the thick black material, and his arms protected from the cold with the addition of sleeves.  
"Fucking weakling..." she heard him mumble once they circled the perimeter again.
Bakugou insisted for them to scout out as many places as possible in hopes for an encounter. He desperately needs any excuse for some action, to use his quirk out of anger. Previously, they patrolled the empty plaza of Tatoone shopping center. Other heroes were there as well, but still no signs of any villains lurking in the dark. For the third time, they met up at the center of the park after making another round, both already tired of the tedious task.
"Just our fucking luck. Still no signs of those stupid villains. I guess we should patrol the outskirts of-."
A bright luminescent beam struck the middle of Bakugou's chest cavity, ricocheting him backwards to slam against the trunk of a large tree, knocking him unconscious instantly. Startled, y/n's eyes frantically searched for the perpetrator, only to meet a pair of glowing green orbs staring right back. She shifted her stance in preparation for their next attack, blocking Bakugou's lifeless body from the villains view. Another beam shot from the darkness, only this time y/n counter balanced the blow by rolling to side, the blast missing her by a couple of feet. Y/N quickly raised to her feet and ran head first towards the dark figure. Without preamble, the figure shot multiple beams at the hero, each one emitting from the void of their chest.
Y/N dodged the bright suffocating strips of light, her feet shuffling and heart racing due to the adrenaline rush. However, she miscalculated her next move which allowed the figure to strike her left shoulder when she was distracted for a split second. Pain shot throughout her shoulder blade. Eyes drawn to a close, her hand shot up to cradle the injury. The intense sensation started to spread from the upper half of her body to below. Everything suddenly became numb, including her sensors. She couldn't feel the tips of her digits nor move any part of her face. The muscles in her legs soon stopped contracting, resulting in her knees giving out. She felt the hard, coarse ground beneath her as the darkness began to swallow up her line of vision. The last thing she saw was a scuffed up Bakugou laying face flat on the drenched grass.
- Y/N stirred awake, lifting one of her half lidded eyes expecting to see the villain looming over her tired body. But all she saw was the popcorn ceiling sheltering her, an overhead fan turned on and the curtains tightly shut. She slowly inclined her body upright and peeled the covers from her clammy figure. Still in the process of waking up, she made her way to the attached bathroom by the bed and located the sink. She splashed the cold water on her face, letting the droplets drench the clothes she was currently wearing. Turning off the facet, she craned her head to view the damage on her shoulder in the mirror. But how come she couldn't recognize herself?
Tuffs of blonde spiked out from her head. Her eyes weren't the same color either. Red crimson irises replaced the ones she had before. The injury from last night on her shoulder wasn't there no more, but she took sight at how broad they became. And she wasn't wearing her typical pajama top and bottoms. This morning she was clad in a black tank top and a pair of soft sweat pants.
No, this can't be true. This has to be some sick nightmare. Jolting backwards on her heel, she let out a terrible shriek. After screaming for a good minute, she calmed down and rested her hands on the bathroom counter, transfixed on the reflection in front of her.
"I-I somehow transformed into Bakugou!" The deep timbre voice of bakugou replaced her own. She tugged on the unkept hair and knitted her eyes shut. "This is only a dream. I'm dreaming right? I can't possibly be in Bakugou's body."
A loud ringing noise alerted y/n to open her eyes again. It was coming from her bedroom. Correction, his bedroom. She glanced at herself in the mirror one more time before retrieving the phone that was stuffed in a green duffel bag. Her eyes widened. She recognized her phone number on the screen. Knowing the circumstances, she pressed answered and awaited for the receiver on the other end to speak.
"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!"
-
"So, we somehow switched bodies because of being struck by that villains quirk the other night. How long did they say this will last then?" Y/N questioned Bakugou the following morning once they agreed to meet up somewhere in private. Right now they were sitting across from each other on a stone bench by the lake, the morning sun peaking through the tall skyscrapers behind them.
Bakugou shrugged his shoulders, technically hers, and said, "Endeavor informed me it'll probably linger for a good week. He also wanted us to not be on duty till we recuperate from this, saying that the side effects will drain our bodies." He couldn't muster up the courage to stare at her, because all he would see is the reflection of himself. "Unfortunately the villain fled the scene before the others arrived to retrieve us. They're still out there causing havoc."
"This is freaking weird."
"Fucking."
Y/N tilted her head in confusion. Across from her, Bakugou pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed in frustration.
"If you're gonna be me for a whole week then you might as well not sugar coat my vocabulary-dumbass."
Right, she now has to devote her time and effort into mirroring Bakugou's explosive personality. But that also means he too has to put on a show in order to persuade everyone he was her.
"Oh, okay..." she started but tensed up when realizing Bakugou was gazing expectantly at her. "D-Dumbass?"
Katsuki groaned as he rolled his eyes at her failed attempt of portraying him.
"This is going to be a long ass week."
- Bakugou grunted in disgust as he scavenged through y/n's closet for something to wear. Every piece of clothing so far hasn't met his criteria of approval to put on his body. There was an unnecessary amount of yoga pants and the most ugliest oversized graphic tees he's ever laid his eyes upon stored in her drawer. Growing up in a household of highly praised designers, the influence shifted his taste in fashion over the years. So, he made the rational decision to make a quick trip to the mall and purchase a few outfits for himself. Considering he's going to be in this body for a whole week, maybe even more, he might as well present himself looking ten times better than she ever has.
He tittered around the mall window shopping, entering store after store leaving with a handful of clothes in plastic and paper bags. So far he bought some outfits that edged a little on the fancy side, but paid no mind to his bank account. Bakugou guesstimated y/n's size during the venture, not wanting to pry or see what's underneath these restricting fabrics. He was about to leave when a frilly-pink themed store caught his attention.
It's a lingerie store, Bakugou thought as he neared closer to the entrance.
Posters inside the displays showcased attractive half naked women clad in nothing but the delicate material. Not to mention they were all posing seductively. An involuntary image of y/n flashed across his eyes, her imitating the same lustrous pose as well as wearing the sheer lingerie like the women behind the glass. Steams of heat practically blowed out from his ears, along with the embarrassing shade of pink panting his cheeks. He clamped a hand on his mouth, eyes widen in disbelief.
The fuck did I just imagine? There's no way in hell that just happened!
He must've been loitering there for awhile because a young girl, possibly his age, was standing in the threshold of the store wearing a pastel pink apron, giving him a welcoming smile.
She spoke, "Looking to shop for something, ma'am?"
Remembering back to y/n's distasteful clothing, he noted that she also lacked having any 'pretty' undergarments. It wasn't that he intentionally raided through her underwear, he just so happen to have stumbled upon the almost empty drawer by accident. In retrospect, he's doing her a favor. He cleared his throat before speaking.
"Yes actually. Can you show me your most expensive set?" - "To your left! That dudes been camping by that spot since the match. He'll snipe you in the open!" Kirishima informed y/n as they both sat criss cross on the cushioned couch.
They've been playing the same game for hours. Y/N prayed for at least one water break or grab something quick to eat since they haven't moved an inch from their spots. Kirishima promised after this match he'll order some takeout for the both of them, but he said the same thing 8 matches ago. All she could do for now was pretend to be immersed in the game, getting a couple of impressive kills here and there, subsequently ranking her to a bronze level. Her digits were beginning to cramp up due to the repetitive moments of smashing down on the labeled buttons on the wireless controller. The screen across from them suddenly went dark and flashed the scoreboard from the recent match. Another successful victory.
"BOOYAAA!!!!" Kirishima clapped his hands and did a celebratory dance. "Ah, good game Bakugou."
Y/N flinched from hearing the blondes name.
"Kirishima, it's Y/N," she reluctantly reminded him.
Kirishima's whole demeanor went south. He chucked out a dry laugh and nervously started rubbing the back of his neck.
"R-Right sorry. Couldn't help myself. I mean, I am looking at Bakugou. Same face, voice, hair, and scary eyes."
After being battered by the villains quirk, Kirishima and Sun Eater were the ones to retrieve them before law enforcement shortly arrived once the perpetrator fled the scene. They were all under one strict oath to not mention this to the public, or else everyone’s image will tarnished and skew the potential of our future rankings.
"I know. I'm still trying to process this whole thing. I've been avoiding all the mirrors in the apartment since I came back." Y/N stood up from the couch and sauntered over to her designated bedroom for the week. She reached for the door handle but stiffened when a pair of hardened hands rested on her broad shoulders.
"Aye, don't worry so much. I bet you Bakugou is thinking the same thing. This week will be over before you know it," he absentmindedly began massaging the area between your shoulder blades and neck.
Does he always treat Bakugou like this despite that nasty little Pomeranian being a complete asshole to everyone?
"Kirishima?"
"Yeah?"
"What is Bakugou like around you?"
The red head hummed to himself at the random question, thinking of a perfect answer to her curiosity.
"The same how he was in high school except more tamer I guess. But I enjoy his presence none the less."
Then why does he seem to unleash his untamed feelings towards me specifically?
Y/N sighed, obviously not satisfied with that answer.
"Out of everybody, he seems to despise me more and more like it's a game," she said without realizing.
"You know how he is Y/N. He's very abrasive and blunt when it comes to other people's emotions, but deep down I know he only acts like that because he wants to present a strong image in front of everyone," he started. "He's scared of others looking down on him, I know that for sure. But I always looked up to Bakugou from the day I personally got to know him. So, I guess he just stayed by my side because of my admiration for him."
Bakugou is always putting up a front then.
"Interesting...well I'm gonna go to bed now. Thanks for keeping me company," y/n said once again reaching for the knob and opening the door, ignoring the red heads pleas for her not go to sleep on an empty stomach. -
The next day Bakugou found himself inside y/n's bathroom, feet firmly planted on the tiled floor not daring to move an inch. Even though he wasn't in his own body that didn't stop him from paying a visit to the gym this morning. He went extra hard on every machine, not caring about the wandering eyes men gave him while he dead lifted weights. Drenched in nothing but his own glistening sweat, Bakugou entered y/n's small apartment as he dragged his tired feet to the bedroom he was now familiarized with.
Something foul wafted into his nostrils, almost making him teary eyed to the stench. He tried to recall the last time he took a shower. Vaguely he remembers washing his body the morning before he got attack by the powerful quirk. It's been several days since then. This was one thing he didn't want to endure during his experience of switching bodies. He's been neglecting his own hygiene to avoid seeing y/n's exposed body parts. Changing out from her clothes with closed eyes was difficult enough, but taking a fucking shower?! Such a shitty predicament. But he can't smell like this for the remainder of being stuck in this body. He'll die of suffocation.
Ah fuck, that must mean she has to take a shower as well. Or worse, she already has and saw everything.
His eye twitched, lips trembling in fear at what he's about to witness.
Fuck it, I can't go out smelling like shit!
With shaky fingers he began stripping, eyes trained on anything but y/n's figure, the faint sound of the water streaming white noise to him. Her gym clothes piled on the floor, Katsuki slipped into the shower, head titled slightly to view only the shower head. He messed around with the chrome handle, indecisive on what temperature he wanted. Settled onto cold to awaken his sluggish state, he positioned himself under the shower head, goosebumps prickling his skin due to the sudden drop of temperature. Water droplets streamed down and canaled to his lower regions, the sensation relaxing his anxiousness just a smidge. He surveyed the options y/n had laid out for hair care products and grabbed the nearest one. Rubbing the body wash into the palms of his hands, he caught himself, arm mid raised getting ready to wash each crevice of his body.
Shit shit shit shit
The hand in front of him began shaking.
She won't know. It's not like I'm touching her sexually, I'm just keeping her clean for fucks sake!
As gentle as he could, Bakugou washed away the soapy residue, fingers cautiously ghosting over anything perking out. A moment too soon, he accidentally skimmed over her chest a little too fast, the tips of his fingers touching something that was hard and protruding. His breathing hitched.
I just felt her fucking nipple!
But fuck, it strangely felt quite pleasant. Pleasurable even if he had to admit.
He continued on with his previous ministrations, cupping her boobs like a madman and swiping one thumb over the taunt surface to test the waters. A fierce, tingling sensation surged shivers down his spine. An unsolicited low moan spurred out from the blonde.
"Hah!"
What the hell?! Why am I still touching her tits? And why am I enjoying it?
Finishing up his routine quickly, Bakugou snatched a towel from the cabinet and rubbed away all the sinful thoughts desperately from his head, a constant fight between his morals and neediness. Nobody will never know what he committed in the confines of her own apartment. And it'll fucking stay like that till on his death bed.
I practically assaulted her. I'm so fucking disgusting
For the rest of the remaining day, Bakugou planned on meeting up with Kirishima to hangout. He wanted to coerce the red head into talking about anything other than y/n. His mind needs the relief. He needs this spell to be over with.
He can't stand trying to fit into women's jeans any longer - Kirishima woke up that morning to a chorus of shrieks. Girlish shrieks, might he add. He thought maybe the neighbors were selfishly doing not-so-holy-things at the peak of dawn. But him and Katsuki were resided on the highest level of the penthouse, them being the only residents on the empty floor. It clicked once he heard his name through the thin walls.
"Ah! Y/N I'm coming!" He leaped from his bed and reached y/n's, technically Bakugou's, room in a matter of seconds.
Y/N's body twitched to the sound of the door being slammed open, the impact rattling the very few wall decorations in the blondes space. Standing in the threshold was the friendly red head, huffing and puffing air out of his chest like he just got done running a marathon.
"K-Kiri! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to wake you up!" Her words afterwards became a jumbled mess, realizing the predicament she pushed herself into.
"Hey, hey, calm down! Tell me what's wrong. It sounded like you were in pain. Did you hurt yourself anywhere?" The red had to remind himself this was indeed another person inside Bakugou's body, because Bakugou would never apologize repeatedly for the sake of apologizing in his entire life.
Y/N was looking quite pallid now, sheepishly tugging on the black covers of the bed, trying to find the easiest way on how to lay this out to her new roommate.
"Well...I just...I woke up to - ah crap."
Instead of explaining her situation, she pulled back the blanket to show kiri the thing protruding between her uncommonly, muscular legs. Kirishima's eyes widen instantaneously, eating up the pitched tent inside her basketball shorts. Oddly enough, this wasn't his first rodeo upon seeing the blonde with a boner. They were dudes. And dudes living together were bound to witness each other's 'flesh swords', he'd like to put it.
"Oh, morning wood? That's pretty normal. Nothing to fret y/n!" He dismissed her with the wave of his hand. "Bakugou gets them all the time! In fact, I remember he'd get them after sparring sessions back in our U.A days-."
"Okayyyyy, Never mind that! I know I have a boner. Just exactly how do I get rid of it?!"
"You mean, you don't know? Haven't you been taught this in Sex Ed class?" Kiri was actually curious as to why she doesn't know nor remember. He surly does. Learning about the human body by the infamous sultry teacher, Midnight, engraved so much information into his tiny-teenage brain.
"That was considered an extra curricular class. I took a CPR class instead."
"Right well, from what she taught us and from my own personal experience, you gotta rub one out."
Y/N's whole face contorted into a confused mess of disgust.
"Rub a what now?" She asked, although she had a feeling what the euphemism meant.
Kiri's face blotched red, the tint flushing to his chest as well. The man was evidently embarrassed about having this conversation with someone who wasn't Bakugou.
"I essentially mean you gotta masturbate. Ya know, in order to calm down your boner," he paused seeing how distraught y/n became. "It won't hurt I promise you! Don't worry, it feels really good! Like, eating ice cream good! Ah no that's not a good analogy!"
"This is so fucking horrifying..." Y/N poked at the thing, rightfully known as his dick, and kept starring as if it might miraculously subside to its original size.
Kiri coughed, grabbing her attention away from Bakugou's dick.
"He has lotion stashed in his drawer," he started, but malfunctioned seconds later. He revealed something private to someone that bakugou condemned as a 'weakling'. "That is if you need it for lubricant. It's kind of tough to jerk off dry..." his sentence fell off midway.
Y/N mumbled out an "Ok", and retrieved said lotion from the lower bunk of his drawers. She felt a pair of eyes on her. Kiri was still standing awkwardly by the doorway, unsure wether or not if that's his cue to leave.
"Um, thanks Kiri. You can leave now," she plopped back onto Bakugou's king sized bed.
This man sleeps alone. He doesn't need a ginormous bed all to himself.
"R-Right! Well, enjoy jerking off- ah no I meant - I didn't word that correctly! Ah geez, see ya later!" He sprinted out the door like his life depended on it.
Locking the door behind her, y/n forced herself into the attached bathroom, the lotion burning the palms of her hand each second. Once she settled down on the lid of the toilet, she shimmied out from his loose basketball shorts, letting them pool at her ankles.
If there's one thing she learned that morning, it was that being a man had its weird benefits. - "Slow down Bakugou! Let me at least catch up before you black out!" Kirishima was on his third shot while Bakugou just downed his sixth one for the night.
The blonde growled under his breath and tugged the red head by his collar to his mouth.
"Fucking idiot, don't call me that. It's y/n when we're out in public," he loosens his grip and snatches kiri's shot and tips his head back to drain it all down his throat, the burning sensation long gone.
"Ugh, my brain can't keep up with this whole switching body shit. It's been so hard back at the apartment." He internally cringes from the recollection of y/n popping her first boner this morning.
"What do you mean? Has that dumbass been giving you a hard time? If she has, I'll give her a piece of my mind."
"Not at all! She's been a saint while living with me. Which by the way, how come you can't just live at the penthouse while y/n stays at her place?
While Kirishima was talking, Bakugou ordered another round of shots. The bartender shoved a whole bottle of Fireball towards the man, saving him in the future to not ask anymore. The young server gave Bakugou a sly wink and returned back to serving other customers down the line. Cheeks flushed red, Bakugou thinks the man behind the bar was being too nice for his liking. He poured two more shots while keeping an eye on the average looking employee. If kirishima kept babbling, he might as well funnel the entire bottle in one sitting.
"I'm just following endeavors orders. We're not supposed to gain attention from those stupid reporters that camp outside our penthouse," he takes another swing of the warm liquid. "I'd rather fucking be quirkless than mistaken for having any rumored relations with her."
"Can I ask a genuine question? How come you hate y/n so much?"
"I don't hate her, I dislike her. There's a difference."
"I don't know man. Sometimes I mistaken your dislike with love."
"EXCUSE ME? IM NOT IN LOVE OF THAT BITCH?!"
"C'mon dude, I'm sensing a lot of denial from you. Also, shouldn't you be acting like her right now? She's very soft spoken if I'm not mistaken,"
"I'm not in denial idiot. I hate how soft she speaks. I hate how sickeningly kind she is even though nobody deserves it. I hate how she wastes her talented quirk and doesn't see the potential. She's a lost cause Kiri. She won't last for much longer in this field if she keeps this up."
"Wow, for someone who dislikes her as such, you surly sound like you care about heeeerrrrrr," kirshima drawled out in a sing-song voice.
"Shut up and finish your shot, shitty hair."
When the blonde was driving back to her apartment later that night, he slammed his fists against the steering wheel when an afterthought came to him.
His whole reasoning as to why he went out in the first place, and he can't seem to restrict himself from talking about the girl he's trapped in.
Even in this goddamn body I can't seem to steer clear from y/n talk! - Izuku had to do a double take when he entered the small coffee shop. Something about seeing the pensive blonde sitting patiently in a booth by the corner really made him feel like he was sucked into another dimension. Today y/n was wearing a white v-neck with a wool green cardigan and tight black jeans.
Kacchan owns cardigans? He thought, clearly amused.
Upon hearing the ding coming from the door, Y/N raised her head from her phone and waved Izuku over to her table. The poor man seemed like he was going combust right there. It's been awhile since he's spoken to his old classmate.
The green haired hero slid into the booth across from her and immediately started speaking Deku language.
"H-Hey Kacchan! Boy it's been awhile hasn't it? I was a little stunned seeing your message this morning asking to hangout. I'm sorry that I couldn't meet up sooner. I had an early patrol shift from 9 to 5. You might know how that feels, right?! Oh gosh I'm sounding like an adult. Can you believe we're adults-."
"Midor- I mean Deku, I called you up to ask about if you have any leads on the villain with the body switching quirk?" She cut him off.
"Oh yeah, that villain has been spotted a few times since the last attack. Of course most of my team hasn't been able to reprimand them. A few close calls though. But I heard two people from your sector got hit by the quirk! Are they doing okay?"
I hate lying to those big freaking green eyes.
"That's not true. They got hurt, but no one was attacked by their quirk. I just need to know if you have any information on the quirk in particular and what to do in order to reverse it."
Underneath the table, Izuku fumbled inside his pockets in search for his mini notebook. He still obtained the habit of jotting down everything, literally everything, in hopes the information will provide any source of aide. Izuku became all jittery and excited at the thought of sharing anything with Kacchan!
The small, crinkled notebook was slid across the table, hitting the tips of y/n's knuckles.
"Page 124, the first indent I wrote. It's mainly about my own conspiracy on what the villains quirk is. That was before their first debut of course. But now since we know it's a type of body switching quirk, I tried to pin point on what exactly lifts the quirks effect on the victim," Izuku explained casually while y/n skimmed through the notes and passages. "I did a little detective work on my own and contacted the people who were attacked by the villain. From what I gathered, let's just say- it's a bit taboo ."
This piqued her interest.
"What do you mean by, taboo?"
The man began to wave his hands around fervently in attempt to steer the blonde away from prying more. But y/n swatted Izuku's hand and continued reading the sloppy inscriptions.
Her eyes popped out from her sockets.
"I have to what?!" A few civilians stared in their direction, obviously gravitated to the familiar gruff voice.
"Calm down Kacchan! Why are you so angry for?"
Y/N rubbed her temple all the while wanting to slowly die than endure anymore of this.
"Nothing. Just- Ugh...Is it alright if I borrow this?"
"Y-Yeah! Kacchan can borrow anything from me as long as he returns it!" There was that gleam again in his eyes.
"Thanks Izuku, I owe you one!" She squeezed the greenettes freckled hand before leaving the booth and the shop all together.
Still in the cafe, Izuku sat frozen as if someone walked in with gun. Internally though, he was screaming. -
Y/N: Please call me. It's urgent
It was a Friday night when Bakugou received the cryptic message from her. He was in the middle of  watching his true crime show when the annoying ding from his phone went off. For once, he just wanted to relax his mind and go on auto pilot without stressing his already strained body. It's the whole principle of Friday's. To fuck off and ignore everyone. What's so fucking important for her to text him out of the blue then?
Another acute ding.
Bakugou peeked over his shoulder to see who disrupted him this time.
Y/N: Bakugou, we need to talk. This isn't something to ignore.
He rolled his eyes and retrained his focus on the tv screen.
Ding Ding Ding
"FOR FUCK SAKE!" He released an animalistic growl from the depths of his throat, scratching his voice box even more. His fingers typed away aggressively, not bothering to read her previous messages.
BK: Leave me the fuck alone. You're to only text me if it involves with the reverse of this stupid quirk 🖕🏼
Three dots appeared immediately after he sent that. Bakugou started losing his patience while waiting for her response. He hated wasting precious time, especially if there was a second party involved. Her message finally delivered. Bakugou's eyes grew larger in size as he read the text.
Y/N: that's why I'm texting you idiot 🙄 I met up with Midoriya today and he may have given me the solution to our problem.
He bit down hard on his bottom lip as he typed out his last text message to her.
BK: fine. come over then. we can talk about it when you get here.
This time he didn't wait for her to respond back and began cleaning her apartment. - Feeling nervous was an understatement. Y/N felt like she was driving herself to her own execution. Bakugou being the one to carry out the death sentence. She didn't doubt the blonde would be elated at the idea of her being put under a torture device.
Okay, maybe he wasn't too malice to actually do it, but he probably entertained the thought.
Thankfully Bakugou's penthouse wasn't far from her own apartment, saving her much needed gas in case he goes ballistic on her.
The door flew open when she arrived shortly after one knock, revealing a very sluggish looking Y/N shooting daggers at her. Well, at least her body wasn't dressed in bruises or burn marks. That's a win. Bakugou paired herself with a cute crop top and silky pajama shorts. He's got taste she'll give him that.
Her apartment remained exactly the same as she left it when they both were ordered to switch residency's.  Only a few traces of Bakugou were found. Mainly in the kitchen, where all his fancy cooking equipment and utensils were laid out. Unlike him, she ate out almost every night due to the red head being incompetent in the kitchen. He almost burnt down the complex last night. He relied upon his friend to do most of the cooking in their household.
The blonde briskly brushed passed her to sit on the couch, slinging his feet on the coffee table to make himself comfortable. Too comfortable, she noted.
"Well, spill it. What did the damn nerd tell you that could help us with this shit?" He inquired without preamble.
Like a hero, she was here on a mission. A mission that needs to be completed as soon as possible, even if the mission itself was ludicrous. She reached into her jacket pocket to retrieve the mini book, and flipped soundlessly to the page Izuku marked for her.
"On here it says that the quirk can last up to a week, maybe even more, depending on the victim(s). The effected will experience dry eyes, nausea, insomnia, painful migraines, and uncontrollable shaking due to being inside another persons body. They must let the quirk take its course then," she read out loud, ignoring Bakugou's groans of annoyance. "But, for rare cases, there have been reports of one's libido being greatly impacted. The victim will be in constant, insurmountable pain unless they relief themselves, then the two bodies will return back to normal."
To her surprise, Bakugou didn't show an ounce of indignation after hearing this piece of information. He seemed almost indifferent.
And there's no denying the truth. Both of their hormones have been off the rails. Ever since the incident in the shower, Bakugou has caught himself numerous times touching Y/N's boobs. Coping a sly feel as he cooked, cleaned, and even while he scrolled through his social media.  Sometimes her ass as well to see if it felt good in his hands. Y/N was no saint either. Sporting boners every hour for no particular reason. All the blood rushing to her lower region became unbearable when she didn't take care of it. Kirishima kept reassuring her that it's natural for a man to get them a lot. But how much was too much?
He threw his hands up in the air and scoffs. "That's it? I just gotta jack off and then we're free from this curse?"
This is the part she dreaded the most. An uncomfortable heat flash roused up her face, a deep shade of red inching across her cheeks and nose.
"No. That's not what it means. We basically have to...ya know...," she paused mid sentence, too bashful to finish, desperately wanting Bakugou to put two and two together.
She shrunk in her position as the blonde narrowed his eyes at her.
"We have to fuck each other?" He profoundly acclaimed.
"Don't put it like that! But yeah, technically, we have to...help relief each other in order to switch back."
"If you wanted to jump my bones so bad you could've just asked." He leans back against the couch, arm draped lazily over the shoulder of the furniture, along with a playful smirk tugging up on the corners of his mouth. Y/N's blood ran cold when she felt the tiniest twitch down below. Her borrowed reproductive organ is betraying her!
"Do you want to be in constant pain till this all wears off? Or do you want to get this over with and never talk to each other again?" Y/N shuffled more towards the abrasive man, a strong tidal wave of anger rising within her.
"It won't matter because you always wound up in my presence anyway. Like a fucking pest that won't leave me alone." Without realizing it, Bakugou got up from his spot on the couch and marched over to Y/N, who at the moment looked like she was about to pop a blood vessel.
Another thing he hated about switching bodies was the fact that everyone towered over him, despite him being on his tippy toes. The woman in front of him acclimated his height, giving her the upperhand if they were to battle it out right now. If anything he could kick her shins at best.
"Whatever...I'm leaving," was all she said before storming off to the front door, grabbing her things along with her as she grew farther from him.
Katsuki's legs were moving on their own. His hand reached out and grabbed Y/N's forearm, halting her movements altogether. She's clearly enraged, thrashing her body back and forth to loosen his grip on her. He eventually grew tired of her stubborness and secured his grip on both of her arms, trapping her between the door and his body, producing a loud 'thump!'. Although he was in her body, he still carried his strength. In a matter of seconds, both Y/N and Bakugou were chest to chest now, their centers tapping aganist each other.  She averted her gaze to the floor, as if their shoes were more interesting than this whole shitshow of a dilema. Bakugou squeezed her shoudlers, a little too much for her liking, to gain her attention again.
"I didn't say no, did I?" he asked hotly, his warm breath hitting her collarbones. An ice cold shiver ran down her spine, causing her breathing to hitch. Bakugou noticed her sudden stiffness and began rubbing gentle circles into the tender flesh of her skin. "Hoho, someone's excited aren't they?"
Confused, Y/N furrowed her brows and backed up further into the wooden door. But her question was soon to be answered as she followed Bakugou's hungry gaze to the prominent bludge taunting from her pants. Betrayed once again by her unstable horniness!
"Guess I'm not the only one," she accuses once spotting the definite wet stain around Bakugou's crotch. He smirked at that.
"Take care of it then," his voice oozed of seduction and want, rewarding him another twitch in your tight pants. The libido was taking full effect now, any animosity they had before was thrown out the window. Past arguments also long forgotten. Their main priority at the moment was to experience the sweet relief of coming undone.
Y/N darted her hand down to the spot Bakugou needed attention from, and cupped his crotch with her abnormally large hand. Bakugou lets out a shaky exhale as her fingers danced around the sensitive area. One of her fingers moved instinctively, feeling how drenched he was in his panties, and rubbed the underside to get a better feel of the sex.
"You're so wet Bakugou," Y/N mused softly. She leaned forward, searching into Bakugou's eyes for any signs of him wanting this to end. But the pool of his irises were blown out, no tint of your original color in them anymore. "Do you want more?"
He nodded quickly, his hair bobbing up and down. Y/N chuckled and removed her hand from its previous position to the hem of Bakugou's shorts, teasingly toying the waistband. She slipped smoothly into his shorts, tickling him in the process, and toyed with the corners of his panties before moving them aside so she could have access to the thing she's been craving to touch. Wetness lathered up her fingers with just one swipe, causing Bakugou to purse his lips and shut his eyes tightly.
"Is Bakugou embarrassed? Are you mad that I have the upper hand now? After all those years of verbally tormenting me, you can't handle my simple touch?" She whispered dangerously close into his ear. During this, she couldn't tell if he was pissed or turned on. Maybe a mixture of both, but she took pride in his strained expression.
"W-Watch your goddamn mouth. Or do I need to shut you up myself, eh?" By shutting her up, he meant mirroring her exact ministrations. The petite hand of Bakugou's latched onto the zipper of her jeans, and impressively dragged it down in one swipe without getting anything caught. He reached into the tight restraints of her boxer briefs and pulled out the hardened dick. He clicked his tongue. "Not to sound like a narcissist, but you gotta admit, my dick looks pretty."
"Just shut up and jerk me off you asshole. I'm starting to see stars," She wasn't lying to speed up the process. Her body felt like it was on fire, including her dick. If Bakugou keeps stalling for the sake of punishing her, then he's going to be seeing white for days on end.
Bakugou tentatively began pumping her, his grip not too tight nor loose on the flesh. Y/N sighed in relief as he swiped his thumb over the slit, covering his fingers in her precum. Seeing that he's giving into her needs, she returned the favor by inserting her index finger inside, not allowing him to adjust once she massaged the velvety walls.
Bakugou arched into Y/N's body, panting harshly against her chest. "H-Hah fuck, slow down. Shit!"
"Take it like a champ, Mr.Dynamight."
"F-Fuck you."
Oh no. Probably shouldn't have patronized him, because Bakugou sped up his languid motions to pure vigorous jerking of the hand. A wave of pleasure shot up through her body, jolting backwards due to the intense sensation. Of course he's a pro at this. What isn't he good at?
Bakugou rested his head onto the crevice of your shoulder since he could only reach so far, and ghosted his lips on the skin, carefully restricting himself to not engage in kissing the area. While doing so, he cupped the underside of your balls, rolling them around in his small hands. They looked so big when being manhandled in her grasp. Y/N stifled her moans as he kept messing with them, all the while stroking her simultaneously. She felt him smile. The cheeky fucker! Two could play it at this game.
Y/N used one of her thumbs that weren't preoccupied inside Bakugou to massage the only place she knew that could make him cum in seconds.  Two fingers inside, one thumb attentively on the clitorous. It was enough to make Bakugou bite down on her shoulder, trying to prevent any moans from escaping his mouth.
"Moan for me Bakugou. I know you want to," she tried to persuade him with more strokes to the clit, occasionally pinching it with her unoccupied fingers. She can feel he was close. So was she. But she needed to coerce him into helping her to finish too. They need to be a team. "Say something Bakugou. Don't you want to cum? If you don't speak your mind I'm going to stop." She couldn't believe the words that were spewing from her mouth. Y/N has never dirty talked before. Nor has she gotten this far with anyone without freezing up. Definitely the libido effect.
Bakugou detached his teeth from her shoulder and stared deeply into her eyes. Pleading.
"Go faster. Please." The want and neediness in his voice said it all.
He indeed felt vulnerable and exposed right then and there when confessing his desire, but he couldn't care less. Her fingers inside him were heavenly. A mantra of ,"yesyesyesyesyesyes", left his throat as her ministrations didn't falter.
"Fuck! Keep going. Just like that- shit - just like that... yesssss." His moans were beautiful. Not because they sounded like hers, but the way how he vocalizes his pleasure made sense in the world. Every whimper or moan puts her closer to the edge.
"Are you- are you about to?" He asked quietly, as though he was afraid you might stop at any rate.
"Yes! So close, just keep stroking," it was difficult to form sentences after that, the build up tension in your stomach tightening like a ticking time bomb, making your pleads indecipherable.
But Bakugou didn't want to hear that. He wanted to her to say those three words of encouragement.
Make. Me. Cum
And then, as if his thoughts were broadcasted live, she snaked her hands into the locks of his hair and pulled him close to where the tips of their noses touched briskly.
In a small voice she whimpers out, "Make me cum, Katsuki."
Listening to her instructions, his grip tightened around the base of her shaft and began teasing the slit, never once averting his glare from her own. Y/N's legs turned into jello. It became harder and harder to stand any longer. She needed to release. She quickened her pace and brutally scissored his pussy, the erotic sounds of their wetness reverberating in the tiny apartment.
"Cum then baby. Cum for me only."
Baby
Next thing she knew a strip of white shot out from below, dirtying the hands of Bakugou's. Her body began to spasm. Katsuki didn't loosen his grip, the stimulation becoming unbearable at this point.
The coil within him loosened, the evidence of his climax coating her fingers, allowing his orgasum to reach its full potential.
The pair blacked out for a split second, but recuperated once the light hit their corneas again.
"Shit." "Fuck." "..." "..."
Silence. Then the realization hit.
"I'm staring at you and not me! It worked! Hallelujah!" Y/N exclaimed, feeling herself to make sure it wasn't a hallucination.
"Gross. You got cum all over my expensive shirt," he said, wiping away the white substance with his sleeve.
Both of them went into the kitchen to clean the after math. Bakugou would grunt occasionally in disgust, sponging away the grime. Y/N throughly washed her hands and towel dried them, thoughts stiffly empty and vexed. She broke the awkward tension.
"Well, I guess we should call Endeavor and inform him that we switched back."
He hummed in agreement.
"And we should probably exchange our things tomorrow or tonight, but preferably soon since we're going to be on duty again."
Another grunt.
"Don't worry about me mentioning this to anyone. We can just keep whatever happened minutes ago between us-
Bakugou cut her off entirely by smashing his lips against hers. Shell shocked by his action, Y/N kept her eyes wide open whilst Bakugou's were knitted shut. She laid her hands on his chest and shoved him away harshly, putting their distance at arms reach.
"Bakugou, what the hell? All of sudden you want to kiss me?" Y/N's face fell, contorting into a mixture of sadness and confusion. "You only kiss people you like. Not hate."
Bakugou moved towards Y/N slowly, a hint of a smile forming as he neared closer.
"And that's exactly why I did it, idiot," he proclaimed confidently, cupping the side of her face. The touch was so tender and gentle she forgot that it was Bakugou at first.
"You're toying with me, aren't you? The libido is probably still lingering. If you really liked me, then tell me the exact moment you did."
Without hesitation he said, "The first day of school. When you walked in."
Y/N slapped the hand from her face, her skin flushing red by his blunt confession.
"Stop lying. You were mean to me the first day of school. And every day after that. I don't think calling people a "weakling" or "stupid" constitutes as liking someone."
All he did was chuckle and continued scooting closer, eventually towering above her. She squirmed underneath him. She secretly missed having his height.
"You're absolutely stupid if you think I really meant any of that crap. I may have gone overboard on the whole berating thing, but that was just my way of pushing my feelings away, in hopes you'd improve better and not take shit from people like me."  
"Ya know, it's kind of hard to detect that when you were practically spitting on my face."
He leaned down and pecked a chaste kiss on the crown of her forehead.
"You can call me all the names you want later. Kick my ass if ya want, but for now let me make it up to you," he whispers before planting his mouth to hers again, only this time she didn't protest.
Heat swirled within her as she watched Katsuki's eyes flutter close, enriched in the moment to open them, and gripped the base of her neck to apply more pressure into the kiss. The man guided her as he moved his plushed lips ontop of hers, consuming the pretty noises she made. And my, were they absoultey rich coming from her.
I want to hear more, the selfish thought banged repeatedly inside his lust filled mind.
Y/N nervosuly closed her eyes shut when Katsuki's wet tongue prodded the entrance of her tight, lipped mouth. Letting him take full control, Katsuki managed to enter the strong muscle into her wet mouth and explored the canvernous place with such eagerness, such tenacity. Like he's been dying to do this for as long as his skillful mind can remember. Y/N found herself moaning as Katsuki grabbed her waist and forcefully collieded their bodies together, her soft breasts pressed up against his hard chest. Her perky tits put him in a trance, remincseing back to the day when first touched them, the guiltiness eating him up from the inside-out. Katsuki slithered one of his hands to the taunt boob and gave it a firm squeeze, causing Y/N to squeak out in embarrasement. They still feel fucking amazing in his hands.
"You're so fucking cute," he drew back from her, already out of breath. Everything was hitting him like a tsunami. He can finally admit to himself that he's been wanting this since they became co-workers. Hell, since the fucking beginning. Younger Katsuki would deem him as a horny loser who lost at his own game, but he wasn't a damn kid anymore.
"K-Katsuki...bedroom?" her hands found their way back into his crisp locks, futher egging him to comply. The small action made him moan.
"Fuck yes," Katsuki growled out and in a haste hooked his arms underneath the back of Y/N's thighs, hoisting her in the air to lead them into the bedroom they're both familair with.
Journeying to her bedroom became a difficult task. If only she'd stop giving his neck, the most sensitve spot out of his entire body, kitten kisses then he'd be plowing her back by now. He grew weaker by the second as the shy, acute kisses trandsitioned into full on sucking and biting. Not that he was complaining.
Katsuki threw her down onto the bed, unable to contain his smile when she hiccuped a chorus of giggles. God, even her giggles are fucking contagious. Strong arms scooped her up momentarily, bringing her to the center of the bed. Grazing her aching spot was Katsuki's growing buldge. Y/N circled her arms around his tiny waist squeezing him closely as Katsuki rolled his hips downwards to meet hers. She seized Katsuki's bicep, whimpering, and rythmically pushed her groin towards his, the tin material of her shorts scraping the surface of his jeans deliciously. His head dragged down to her collarbones, panting softly, wetting the skin from the condesation of his breath.
"I want you so fucking bad, please," he managed to choke out in between the continous grinding.
Gaining a newfound confidence, Y/N mimiced the way how Bakugou unzipped her when they were still in opposite bodies and peeled back his briefs till his inflamed member popped out, smacking his lower belly. He cursed under his breath noticing the immense amount of pre-cum leaking from the head. As much as she wanted to lick it all up, there were other things to tend to. She shimmied out from her skimpy shorts and crop top, not wasting any time for lingering touches. But Y/N caught a menacing glare in his eyes. His attention was focused on something else. Looking down, she saw that she was sporting a sheer laced bra with matching panties. She definitely doesn't remember having these in her personal closet.
"You bought me lingerie?" Y/N tried to sound unfazed at the thought of Katsuki willingly purchasing these pretty undergarments for her. That must mean he's seen her boobs!
"Yeah? So what if I did. Your sense of fashion is nonexistent. I pitied you that much to where I bought you shit with my own money."
His face was stern, scarily resembling the times he'd be bashing someone's head on the concrete during a bloody battle. But his eyes told a different story. She couldn't quite pin point the time or place when she witnessed the same gleaming spark in those vermilion orbs, but she felt safe and wanted all in one.
So she began teasing the straps of her bra, head still in disbelief that the blonde underneath her bought it, and let the material slip off her shoulder seductively. Bakugou's breathing quickened as he watched y/n toy with the next strap. He stopped her midway.
"No," his fingers were ironically cold.
"No?" She questioned him, awkwardly frozen still on his lap. His evident boner pushing up against her sex, making her wet even more.
Numbly, Bakugou pulled up both of the straps to her bra and chuckled lightly to himself.
"I wanna fuck you with this on. It's been on my mind since I bought it," he admitted out loud.
Y/N held back a moan, his words carrying so much weight to them all the while directing it straight to her drenched pussy.
Without saying a word, y/n left acute kisses on Bakugou's neck, trailing it down further and further till she reached the leaking head of his member. He became antsy as she wrapped her petite hand around the base, fingers tracing the topography of his veins. Y/N saw the desperate look on his face and took all of him in her mouth, holding in the breath of oxygen she took before doing so. Bakugou hissed, teeth clamping down on his bottom lip nearly ripping the skin apart. This feels way better and more appropriate. He prefers her wet mouth over her fingers any day of the week.
Y/N sucked in her cheeks, allowing herself to take more of his member. The tip of his head eventually hit the back of her throat, causing her to gag and choke due to the sudden pressure.
"F-Fuck. Holy shit, keep going," Katsuki begged, tears swelling in his ducts already.
The saliva from her open mouth created a natural lubricant, making it easy for her to bob her head up and down. Bakugou's ears picked up the erotic wet squelching sounds coming from her as she kept up the brutal pace, the noise alone making him want to come undone. The sight of y/n slobbering on his dick is now engraved in his head. He let out a wanton moan when she played with his balls, recalling the memory of him performing the same ministration on himself with her beautiful hands.
He can feel the familiar sensation spreading down below, his throat constricting as the stimulation of her sucking and licking becoming too much. Before she could continue, Bakugou reached over and lifted her head by her hair.
"I can't hold it in any longer. I need to be inside you now," his voice was strained to point where it came out as a whisper.
Pushing her back gently, Bakugou latched his mouth onto hers as he spread her legs wide apart. Revealing a canal of her wetness dripping from her panties to the inner thighs. Bakugou licked his lips hungrily. Mentally slapping himself for not tasting her before she gave him head. He'll make sure to explore that endeavor later.
Lips still locked, Bakugou tugged the bottom half of her laced panties aside, strings of her glistening wetness shimmering, and positioned himself at her aching entrance. The tip of his cock teased her folds, coating it even more. He agonizingly went in slow circles, occasionally slapping her clit with it. Y/N's arms were above her head, clutching the linen sheets in anticipation. Katsuki smirked against her lips at her wrecked expression.
"Bakugou please...," y/n pleaded with her full chest. She wants to know how it feels to be wrapped around him. To be one with him. "Don't hold back. Just fuck me."
Bakugou's eyes grew darker after the demand, pure lust taking control over his body now. He sheathed into her quickly without taking his eyes off of her face. A quiet whimper left her throat when he fully bottomed out. He checked for any signs of y/n looking displeased or uncomfortable, but he got his answer when he felt her legs wrap around his torso, pulling him in as close as possible. Bakugou basks in at the sight of y/n sucking him completely, her legs fully bent back in an awkward position. He decides to pull his cock halfway out. y/n whimpers due to loss of friction but gets rewarded seconds later when Katsuki rams his cock inside again, pushing all his weight onto her.
"Oh, fuck, Katsuki!," she whines, instinctively clutching her walls around him.
"You're so tight for me huh baby? Can't help but to clamp around this dick," Katsuki sneered while pumping tentative thrusts into her.
His hands clasped both of her thighs now, pulling her towards him, urging her to move in a harmonious dance with him. Finding somewhat of a rhythm, y/n fucked Katsuki back by rolling her hips, a synapse of heat exchanging between them. Sweat starts dripping down from the crown of his forehead onto the peaks of her breasts. Lost in thought, he tipped his head forward and lapped up the remains of his salty musk, tongue expertly twirling around the taunt nipple. Y/N mewled, hands searching - reaching - for anything to ground herself, settling on interlocking her fingers with Katsuki's nitroglycerin drenched hands. She titled her head and took a whiff.
Caramel and soap
A popping sound went off in her ears. Katsuki released her swollen tit only to look up with hooded eyes, his infamous smirk on full display.
"Open your mouth," was all he said before raising one of his fingers that she was so embarrassingly fixated on moments ago. When she didn't obey Katsuki grabbed her by the jaw and shoved not one, not two, but three fingers in her mouth. Like with his cock, she couldn't handle the intensified pressure in the back of her throat, gagging instantaneously.
"Atta girl. Just take my fingers like a good bitch. Oh? You like it when I degrade you huh? Don't lie, you tightened instantly when I said that." Katsukis pace sped up rapidly, pumping into her cunt like a madman, fingers still lodge down her throat. Each thrust left her shuddering for more, his hips meeting hers to create a loud song, the noise drowning out her muffled screams.
It became hard to see now, a tunnel vision of just a crimson glow. Soon she feels herself becoming light. Katsuki grew impatient and flipped y/n on her stomach, a tiny oof rocked out from her, and inserted his member back into her stretched out cunt.
Y/N yelps as Katsuki's cock hits the sweet spot - fresh tears flooding down her flushed face, babbling nonsense into her pillow.
She caves, sobbing, "yes, yes, ohgod. you feel so good. you're so fucking good -ah katsuki!"
Looming over her trembling body, the blonde slows his harsh thrusts to a savagely slow grind. He lowly chuckles watching her writhe and wiggle her body in desperation.
"You think you can just come that easy? Beg for me to let you come!"
Smack!
A harsh sting rattled her lower back, causing her to bite down harshly on her lip to avoid showing any pain.
"Such an asshole..." y/n huffed out, oblivious to the way how Katsuki was preparing for her next punishment.
Smack! Smack!
"Not good. Ask nicely for me to fuck this pretty pussy into the mattress."
More whimpers into the tear stained pillow.
"P-Please Katsuki..." she begins, frustration growing exponentially with every word. "Fuck me. I need your cock. I always needed your cock Katsuki. Make me scream out your name when I come!"
She didn't even have time to process what she said before Katsuki enclosed his hand around her throat, forcefully dragging her writhing body to his chest, cranking her head in a 90 degree angle. Cock still warming up her insides.
"That's my girl," he said before kissing her lips again, devouring the sweet noises she made.
Her neighbors were in for a long night. - Both of their bodies the next morning faced more damage than any crusade of a patrol. Bruises painted the outskirts of y/n's body, trailing from her thighs to the divots of her breasts. Katsuki paid no mind to it, seeing how he can make a bloody lip a trailblazer look.
Even though no one wanted speak much about the issue at hand - last night was a pivotal moment for their relationship.
Because y/n wouldn't be making a fresh batch of coffee for the Katsuki Bakugou in her kitchen right now.
Because Bakugou wouldn't be lounging by her washing machine, waiting for the timer to go off so he can put her bed sheets in the dryer.
They found themselves sitting comfortably in silence - the soft whipping of car horns outside her cracked window - Katsuki blowing on his coffee before taking a sip. It all seemed unreal to her. In any other circumstance they'd be at each other's necks by now, screaming nuisances in the air. She considers this whole ordeal a ruse. But it isn't. Thank god it isn't. Because Katsuki never looked calmer or relaxed in his entire life till now. And she wasn't going to bat an eye away from this ground breaking phenomenon.
Intently watching him drink from across the table, she ponders if Katsuki liked her from the get go, and maybe just disguised his feelings with disgust towards her later on. The question will go unanswered, possibly until he confides and tells the story himself, but for now she was content not knowing the what if.
"How did you know I like black coffee?" Katsuki asks, quirking up an eyebrow at her.
Y/N takes a long drag from her mug, indulging in the sweet taste of the caramel creamer.
She smiles and says, "I don't know. Just took a wild guess."
-
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achillieus · 4 years
Text
we’re fools. (bucky barnes x reader)
summary: for all bucky barnes knows, he hates clichés. and this thing between you two, happens to be the biggest one.
(enemies to lovers trope or i watched the society on netflix recently and based this entirely on harry bingham and cassandra pressman)
pairing: college au!bucky x reader
warnings: alcohol, angst, too much tension, bucky and reader are stupid and in  denial, sexual tension all around the place
tagging: @tonystankschild​
(other parts)  (masterlist)
part 2/3:
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And then it’s the last week of February and you have an assignment together, you and Bucky, the boy with black hair and a mind that you’re certain is not as clever as he insists it is. You know this cannot possibly end well. You feel it when he sits beside you and his knee brushes past your leg. You feel it when you take a breath and smell his aftershave. Sandalwood and vanilla. It makes you want to lick your lips. Please, get a grip. You try to get away, even propose to write the whole thing alone so you wouldn’t have to spend any time around him. In your mind, you call it self defense. But Bucky’s boastful and you can see him pumping the muscles in his neck, trying to intimidate you.
“My dorm, tomorrow at 7,” he says “Don’t be late.”
-
(your late night instagram search history)
(00:38 AM) #literaturememes
(01:15 AM) @buckybrns
(01:30 AM) #newgirl
(01:50 AM) @buckybrns
(02:10 AM) @buckybrns
You find it annoying; how he’s present even when he’s not around.
-
The thing about Bucky Barnes is that everyone, boys and girls, adore him alike. He’s charming, he’s crafty, he’s brilliant. He’s everything they want him to be and even more. It nearly condones his megalomania.
The thing about Bucky Barnes is that he’s aware he has an audience. Always plans his moves, knows how to play his character perfectly. He wears dark designer jeans and plain Henley shirts, buttons open, fabric tight around his biceps. Sometimes even a black leather jacket and a tag necklace. Girls are intrigued by the bad-boy, straight A student contrast, while the boys are envious enough keep him close and invite him to all of their parties. Bucky gives them whatever they need.
The thing about Bucky Barnes is that he’s utterly lonely. He has never said so, but it’s the truest thing about him. He has Sam. But for how long? Bucky’s used to people going away. It has been imprinted on him. His best friend, Steve, left with his girlfriend in an exchange program last month and Natasha, the one girl he ever came close to loving, just started dating Clint Barton. Clint fucking Barton. What a downgrade.
And then there’s you, sitting at the end of his bed, playing with the ring in your finger, reading some neatly written lecture notes. Usually, Bucky would think about 129 cheeky comments he could make to a girl in his room. But not to you. Are you sure, Bucky? He has grown accustomed to disliking you. It’s the one constant he has left and he’s not planning on losing it.
He leans down and takes the place next to you, a bottle of beer dangling loosely in his hand.
He offers and you decline.
“We need to concentrate on the project.”  
“You’re the biggest killjoy.” Bucky says with a hint of a smirk.
“I’m studying, Bucky.” He can see your left hand holding that dark green pen in a tight grip and your eyes trying to focus everywhere but on his face. He can see your hair glistening in the warm afternoon light that comes from his window. He can see the soft red blush on your cheeks and the beauty mark on your neck. What a tricky thing it is to see. And to feel. And to want.
Is that what dislike tastes like, Bucky?
-
He talks a lot, that’s the first thing you notice. He says all sorts of things, most of them having nothing to do with your project. You’re certain it’s because he’s feeling as uncomfortable and agitated as you. But still, it’s annoying as hell.
“Listen,” you say and turn to his side “I’m not going to fail this class just because you have the attention span of a two year old.”
A laugh escapes his lips and you watch, completely in awe, the way little wrinkles form around his eyes and his nose scrunches. Right now, he looks tender and warm. No, he doesn’t.
“I think we’re both pretty smart,” Bucky says nonchalant and wets his lower lip with his tongue, before he adds, “We’ve got this, so relax doll.”
There are rules, things that are solid, de facto.
Example 1: Bucky never praises you. At least not out loud.
Example 1: Not valid anymore.
Example 2: Bucky uses the word “doll” approximately ten times a day. To other girls. The girls he likes. Not to you.
That’s actually wrong, he called you doll the first time you met. That doesn’t count. He didn’t know you then.
Example 2: Not valid anymore.
It feels foreign. Pleasant and beguiling, but foreign.
“You always call girls “doll”. What is this?” You ask and he looks up. “Is it like your thing, your flirt move?”
Bucky meets your gaze, his forehead creased, and holds it for some seconds before he laughs again. Is this amusing him?
“No, I’m serious.” You bite your lip. “You even did it to me when we first met.”
“I did?”
Of course he doesn’t remember, what did you expect?
“Yeah, when you helped me find the admission office.”
“And you remember that, an entire year later?” He raises his eyebrows, looking entertained and partly interested.
Your mind empties and for some time you feel out of place, embarrassed. But you’re quick to recollect yourself. You can’t let him get you.
“It was my first day as a college student, I remember all of it.”
Liar. You don’t even remember who you sat next to.
Bucky smirks a little too long for your liking and then he leans in, his body bending in a way that makes you forget to breath. He’s so close and you only see blue, a rare kind of blue between the depths of the ocean and the brightest shade of the sky at noon. This would be so much easier if he wasn’t that handsome. Handsome and indomitable. What an awful combination.
“Interesting.” He whispers and lies back, touching the wall.
You tuck a piece of hair behind your ear and clear your throat.
“I should go, it’s obvious we’re not making any progress.” You pick your books and stand up. “Sometimes I wonder how you get all those perfect grades, you clearly-” You merely finish your sentence before he grabs your arm and swiftly, he has you pressed against his wooden bookcase. You don’t have time to blink.
What’s happening? He was sitting down a second ago.
“That day,” he says while his thumb draws circles on your wrist. “You were wearing a denim dress and some Saturn shaped earrings. And you were holding a cherry juice box.”
It’s utterly terrifying how your emotions toss and turn the moment you realize what he’s talking about and the fragile muscles of your heart ache because Bucky cares. Bucky remembers.
“It wasn’t my first day of college, but I remember.”
You want to throw up. Or kiss him. You’re not sure. You know you hate Bucky. Do you? You’ve taught yourself to. And it was never supposed to change. It shouldn’t have to.  
You part your lips to say something, anything, but he shakes his head and steps back.
“You should go.”
And you do. And you’ll never tell him, but you’ll always regret not kissing him then. You’re sure now.
-
your inbox, the next morning
(10:25 AM) from [email protected]
              I’m sending you our assignment. You only need to add a few things and it’s done. If anything else comes up, it’s better we work on our own.
-
For Bucky, it all came crashing down the moment he first saw you. It was all over the moment his eyes met yours. A gourmand perfume lingered in the air around you that day and it stained his pores. And it’s been with him since then. Clinging onto his flesh.
It’s partly obsessive and partly romantic and Bucky tries to keep it locked inside. He thinks he can make it go away easily, the way he flicks a crumb off his expensive cashmere scarf. He thinks if he doesn’t talk about it, it’ll be less true. That’s not how things work, Bucky.
Yeah, he’s starting to notice.
And he���s trying so hard to hate you. The problem is, he doesn’t think he can.
(his late night instagram search history)
(00:45 AM) #tomfordperfumes
(01:30 AM) @y/n
(01:50 AM) #funnycats
(02:15 AM) @y/n
(03:45 AM) @y/n
-
You make it your mission to avoid him and it’s going well until the fifth of March. You spot him at Sam Wilson’s party. You should have known he’d be here, they’re friends. There’s a thick cloud of cigarette smoke all around, but still, you can perfectly see him. He’s standing alone, his skin changing colors under the neon lights, a plastic cup in his hand, eyes crystal blue and swollen and fixated on you.
The room is small and everything feels known but unfamiliar at the same time; the atmosphere, his gaze, the lump on your throat.
They’re suffocating you, the looks you give each other.
-
“Buck, what do you want?” Sam asks, holding both vodka and gin and he observes the way Bucky merely turns his head to look at him.
What do you want Bucky?
Not to play a role anymore. For Steve to be back. Maybe, Natasha. No, he hasn’t thought about her in a month. Perhaps a Pulitzer Prize. Definitely a new pair of sunglasses. But there is one more answer he has behind his teeth.
Y/N, he almost says. Always.
“Vodka.”
-
He leaves before midnight and you can’t remember where the urge came from, yet you’re following him. You know he has noticed. But he just keeps walking until he reaches the door of his dorm and presses his back against it. He sees you and you see him and his eyes cut your heart open.
“Your place is on the other side of the building.”
“I know,” you mumble, “I just never got to say good job on the assignment and I wanted to.” You are unable to meet his eyes. You sound pitiful and you want to hit a wall; with your head.
Why the hell did you follow him here?
Because sometimes you do stupid things.
Bucky mockingly opens his mouth, as if shocked. It almost makes you groan.
“Did Miss high and mighty just comment something nice about me?”
“Why do you have to contradict everything I say?”
He shakes his head and you can feel your heart beat loud and irregular and it’s not because you’re mad. It’s because he’s coming closer, almost chest to chest now. And it’s because you can swear, he just glanced at your lips.
“Someone has to, you can’t act like you know everything all the time.”  
“I don’t do that, you don’t know a thing about me Bucky.”
“Oh, but I do. You’re Y/N, you like plaid skirts and Homer and dark green pens. You expect everyone to be perfect. You expect yourself to be perfect. And you always want to do the right thing.”
His pupils are dilated. Yours must be too. Bucky Barnes is dangerous and fatal. He makes your blood coil and your mouth dry. And there’s a tension, almost pain, almost agony, deep in your lungs and it burns. And you don’t know who leaned in first, probably you because Bucky isn’t that brave yet, but suddenly your hands are everywhere. Your fingers blending in his hair, his digging in the skin on the back of your neck. He’s bringing you closer and it’s a mess and all you can hear is the beating of your heart; a rapid vibration between your ears. It’s pure and raw and it doesn’t hurt anymore.
He tastes like ambrosia and a year-old despair and you think you can go on forever. You eventually break apart because you both need to breath and for a second you worry because he looks like he’s ready to cry, but instead he smiles, softly touching your cheek.
“Did I do the right thing?” You whisper.
...
feedback is so appreciated and motivates me tons, thank you :)
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