#alfie solmons x oc

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Dawn in Your Eyes Part 22

Summary: Alfie has little to no idea why Caroline ever gave him the time of day. The blind woman seemed far too sensible to even speak to him. But soon he finds himself falling helplessly in love.

Part 22: Alfie and Caroline find that there’s something more harrowing than a brief marital disagreement. 

TW: antisemitism 

            “Mr. Solomons.” Candace hesitated to approach the man’s office. She had heard the shouting back and forth between him and Caroline as she put a plaster on Chava’s hand. It was nothing she wanted to get involved in. But Caroline had called for her and insisted that Candace bring Alfie back to the bedroom.

            But Alfie didn’t look to be in the mood for any conversation. “What is it?” He asked gruffly.

            The young woman wrung her hands together. “Well, Mrs. Solomons was asking if you would return to speak with her further.” She explained.

            “Does she? Well, tell her that I ain’t talking about anything else with her today. She’s being reckless, frankly, and I won’t have anything to do with it.” He replied curtly.

            Candace had a fondness for the Solomons family, ever since she had been brought in to care for Caroline during her pregnancy. She thought they were lovely people, having seen them in a vulnerable state of domesticity. But that still didn’t erase Alfie’s temper.        

            So, she tried another approach. “Perhaps, you could talk to me about it?”

            He lifted his head to look at her with scrutiny.

            “I often find that if you tell someone else your side of the story, you can see things a bit clearer.” She explained with a shaky voice. She was just waiting for Alfie to throw her out of the house for being so nosy and prying into his personal business.

            But instead, he sighed. “She wants more children.” He waved a hand to the chair that was sat across from his desk.

            Candace took the invitation and sat down.

            “I just don’t think it’s a good idea ‘cause of what happened with Chava. I ain’t gonna lose her to something that could be avoidable. If we don’t have any more children then we don’t run the risk of-well whatever could happen.”

            Candace nodded. “I understand you want to be cautious. But I suppose you could understand Mrs. Solomons too. She told me it was customary to have a big family.”

            “Yeah, s’pose it is.” He grumbled. “But tradition be damned, her life comes first.”

            “Right, I understand.” Candace nodded. “I think…you’re both right and unfortunately there’s no way of knowing how things will go if you do have more children. But I guess that’s what life is all about. We don’t know how many days we have left.” She shrugged. “It’s about making the best of what you have right now.”

            Alfie scratched his beard as he looked at her. “That’s very Jewish.” He said. “Creating heaven in this life, now.”

            “Oh, I didn’t realize…”

            “No, it’s good. Makes sense. Rational, innit? Life should be celebrated.”

            She smiled. “Right.”

            “Very profound, Candy.” He praised. “I thought Chava was a fast learner because of me but it might be because of you.” He chuckled and stood up. “If you’ll excuse me, I should go talk to Caroline.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

            It took a few conversations between Alfie and Caroline before they reached an agreement. They would go ahead with having more children as long as there was both a midwife and a doctor at hand during the birth. And if possible, she would give birth in a hospital instead of the home.

            But the rest was up to fate.

            Meanwhile, Chava celebrated her second birthday. As she grew and learned, Alfie and Caroline were testing the waters to see if she could recognize Caroline’s blindness. Or at least understand it. It proved difficult as she seemed too young to comprehend but old enough to know something was different.

            As her temper started to develop a little more, it became very clear that she was her father’s daughter. She could throw a fit like no other and when she wanted to be loud, she could be ear piercing.

            Much to Alfie’s chagrin, Chava was a little sponge and would pick up on anything he did or said. She stomped her feet to imitate the heavy sound of his boots in the home. She swore like a sailor and there wasn’t anything Caroline or Alfie could do to change that. Alfie tried to change his vocabulary in front of the toddler but it was too late.

            Alfie was in hot water for a bit with Caroline and Julia but it was something they had to live with.

            Aside from her mouth and occasional temper, Chava was a lovely little girl. She adored her parents and loved nothing more than just spending time with them.

            When Alfie came home in the evening, Chava would run to him with a big grin on her face. And every single time, the stress rolled right off his shoulders. He picked her up and held her close, greeting her warmly.

 ~~~~~~~~~~

            One night, however, her smile wouldn’t be able to cure his stress. As he came home, Caroline met him at the door instead of their daughter.

            There was worry creased into her face and Alfie was terrified that something had happened to Chava.

            “Carrie, what’s wrong?”

            “My aunt just called. Her office building was just set on fire. Or-or bombed, they don’t know yet.” Tears were slipping down her cheeks.

            “What?” It certainly wasn’t the news he was expecting. “Just now?”

            She nodded, clearly just as confused as he was.

            “Right, wait here.” He instructed. “I’ll be right back.”

            “No, you need to stay!” She reached out to him. “It isn’t safe. Not until we know what really happened.”

            “This might be…” Well, Alfie could come up with a few different potential causes. Sure, it might have been an accident, but he wasn’t counting on it. In fact, he was already lining up a list of suspects in his head. However, that meant that the attack was ultimately his fault. Whoever it was, if they were his enemy, they were trying to get back at him for something. Now Caroline’s family and their business were in the line of fire.

            “It’ll be alright.” He assured her. He took her hand in his and kissed her forehead. “Call Ollie. Have him bring Shayna and the kids over. I want everyone to be together until we figure this out. I’ll send Julia here when I get there.”

            Caroline nodded but still looked worried. “Just hurry, please.”

            “I will.”

~~~~~~~~~ 

            Alfie rushed across town. There was a plume of smoke leading the way to the scene. People had gathered at a far enough distance to see what had happened. There were quiet whispers as he pushed his way through. A police car had already pulled up as the fire was starting to be put out.

            Judging by a quick glance at the smoldering remains of the building, there was little chance it was a small accident.

            Alfie found Julia talking with a police officer. Her hand was clutched to her chest. The usually iron-tough woman was shaken by the near-death experience.

            “Julia.” He approached.

            “Oh, Alfie.” She touched his arm, her hand trembling. “Thank God, you’re alright. Caroline thought maybe something had happened to you.”

            “I’m alright. What happened?”

            The cop didn’t look too pleased to see the notorious gangster intruding. “Move along, Alfie, this has nothing to do with you.”

            His eyes darkened. “This is me family, mate. Has more to do with me than it does you. So why don’t you fuck off and find out who did this?” Though, he didn’t really put that much trust in the police to figure out the truth.

            Yet, he could be wrong. “We know who did it.” The officer responded sharply.

            “Yeah? Who was it then?” Alfie demanded, ready to put his hands around the neck of whatever lowlife committed the crime.

            “It’s not any of your business. Scotland Yard will take care of it. Stay away from the matter, lest you want to be locked up for interfering.”

            “That a fucking threat?” He snarled. “You better fucking tell me who it was or I’m going to-”

            “Alfie, enough.” Julia interrupted sternly. She knew her niece would be a wreck if he was locked up for threatening an officer. “I’d like to see Caroline, let’s go now.”

            He glared at the cop. “You’re lucky. I’m gonna find out, you can put money on that, mate.” He jabbed a finger at him before ushering Julia away from the building that was crumbling.

 ~~~~~~~~~

            Before they entered the flat, Alfie stopped Julia. “Did he tell you?”

            “Not who they were. But he said they’re fascists.” She answered quietly. “Blackshirts.”

            Suddenly, it went beyond Alfie. This was no petty retaliation from the Titanic or Sabini. It had nothing to do with who Julia was associated with. It had to do with their identities.

            Alfie could handle people not liking him. Whether they disliked his occupation, his sinful behavior, his kill count, or his distasteful personality. That was all well and good. But once people started targeting his religion, he felt like he could black out from rage. The heart of his people being aimed at like they weren’t even humans. It was sickening. And it was getting closer and closer to home. There was no ignoring it, no chalking it up to a bunch of radical morons with twisted ideology. No, it was serious and far beyond Alfie’s scope of power. Still, that didn’t mean he wouldn’t do anything about it.

~~~~~~~                       

            Caroline hugged her aunt close, relieved she had made it out alive. But she was still confused. “Did you speak with the police?”

            “Let’s not concern ourselves with that.” Julia shared a look of discomfort with Alfie. Neither of them was really in the mood to discuss the root of the crime. It felt horrendous saying out loud. “Let’s just be thankful no one was killed.”

            Caroline nodded somberly. “Alfie, Chava is upstairs asking for you.”

            “Alright, I’ll tuck her in. Just want to talk to Ollie first.” He gave his wife a quick peck before going to find Ollie.

            He and Shayna were sitting in the parlor. Their three children were there as well. The two eldest seemed frightened by what was going on, but the youngest was asleep, unaware.

            “Ollie.” Alfie jerked his head to the kitchen.

            His assistant understood and stood up to follow. “Did they say anything?”

            “Fascists.” He replied quietly.

            The young man looked confused. The Blackshirts had been in the news but it seemed like a distant worry. Surely something so insane would be written off by the general public before anything would really happen. “Here?”

            Alfie nodded. “Scotland Yard’s looking into it, guess they know who did it. Be honest, I doubt they’ll be put in prison. If they do, won’t be for long.”

            Ollie looked wary. “Sir…I don’t think whatever you’re thinking of doing is a good idea.”

            His boss narrowed his eyes. “So, we’re just supposed to let those fuckers do whatever they want? Next time there’ll be people in the building, Ollie.” He snapped. “And we’re gonna be wondering why we didn’t do anything sooner.”

            “But, sir, this is something bigger.” He reminded Alfie. “It’s a political party. They aren’t just a small gang.”

            “A group of violent men with a set of beliefs is a gang. Don’t care if they have a political party. Fuck it, I could have a political party if I wanted. All I care is that they come to realize that they ain’t coming back into Camden ‘less they want consequences.”

            “Well,” Ollie knew there was little chance of talking him out of anything. “Tomorrow I can see what we might be able to find out about what the Yard knows. Though, we don’t have any informants on the inside.”

            “I know someone who does.” Alfie nodded. “I’m going to bring Caroline and Chava to Margate tomorrow. If you’d like Shayna to go as well, that can be arranged.” If he could just pick Camden up and out of London and move all the people to safety, he would. But at the same time, Alfie was afraid of budging. He would not be chased out of his own territory. His family was forced out of Russia because of being Jewish. Alfie was not being forced out anymore. He was staying put.

 //Holy moly I’m so sorry for the delay in this. I kept going back to the document but was in such a block that I just had to put it aside for a bit. It’s been so long since I uploaded that 90% of my tag list deactivated 😂 

Permanent Tag: @papa-geralt-of-cirilla @biba3434 @kimmietea @karmezii @enrapturedbythemoon @vampgirl1997 @tarafaithe @evelynshelby

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Choking On Sapphires 86

Characters: Alfie Solomons x Genevieve (OFC)

Title & Song: Love Interruption

Summary: As Genevieve comes out of her Morphine haze, she finds that life both inside and outside the house isn’t the same as it was before her incident. She and Alfie come to a breaking point of tension for her behavior.  Song is Love Interruption by Jack White. 

Warnings/Tags: Language. References to assault and violence. PTSD. Angst.  Trauma. Fighting, verbal and physical. Discussions of pregnancy and miscarriage. 

Click on my icon then go to my Mobile Masterlist in my bio for my other works and chapters. (Had to do this since Tumblr killed links, sorry.) Please like, comment and reblog if you enjoyed it! It helps out us writers A LOT!

Life without the fog of influence from Morphine was much different for Genevieve. She lets it work out of her system, a nasty process she suffers through, feeling as if she were being punished for the blindness it caused to her behavior. She’d spoken to Claire and Aggie on very intimate levels, demanding they not hold back or be dishonest. She realized she’d been suspended in a dream. Somewhere that wasn’t reality and time had kept passing by without her being involved. She knew that wasn’t how she wanted to live. She wanted her life back. She wanted to be herself again and that self was now someone who had been through something terrible but she couldn’t change it now. She knew it was time to stop living in the past where the pain was. It was time to move forward and leave that old version of herself behind and rise anew.

She and Alfie were not the same people they had been before. She had a lot of thinking to do as to how to approach a relationship with him now. Everything was kept at a surface level while she detoxes and reflects. They share polite conversation in the evenings most nights, but nothing of substance. She wasn’t sure how to even bring up what they had said and done to each other. It wasn’t a subject she wanted to discuss, and it loomed over her like a cloud, always threatening to burst. She knew he was tense from the experience, but she didn’t feel any ill will towards her now like she had before. There wasn’t anger when he met her eyes, nor was there disappointment. Only a carefully calculated endearment that kept them both in their own space, merely cohabitating together.

What Gen didn’t know was that Alfie’s hesitancy to embrace this new version of herself came from his own pessimism for it. He was holding his breath, waiting for something else to happen, something bad, a relapse always on the horizon in his mind. It kept him tense and unapproachable. He thought it was to save Genevieve the hurt of his anger and disappointment again when it happened, but it was really to save himself.

With the withdrawal effects fading from her system, Gen had begun to feel rather poorly one morning. It didn’t incite the lust for the relief from medicine and she was grateful, but she did succumb to an indulgent nap. She sleeps soundly, as she had since ridding herself of the toxins. She does something she hadn’t done with clarity in some time, she dreams. With an array of everyday mundane events, a maze of her own home twisted into a dreamscape she finds herself in her garden again. Surrounded by large blooms, larger than her head that makes her feel happy. In the center of this Eden with its four fountains and golden hour sunlight, an unlikely prospect emerges. One she hadn’t seen in weeks now. One of the children from the Morphine fits stands smiling.

“Hello, Mum.” she greets sweetly, a low and steady voice like Gen’s, the same long black hair and olive skin. Alfie’s eye color and lips. She runs to embrace her, and unlike times before she does not disappear. She holds her as real and solid in her arms as any living thing.

“My darling, my love, my angel...are you real now? Have you come to me finally?” she asks, kissing her hair and holding her face in her hands as she cries.

“No.” she answers with the same soft inflection. Gen’s heart drops. “I’m only what you want to see. I’m what could’ve been What could still be.” she adds with a wise mind that is far beyond the teenage years she appears.

“What do you mean, child?” Gen rasps, touching her face and trying to memorize every feature.

“You’re a mother. You always will be.” she says supportively with a subtle smile.

“I’m...I’m not…” Gen shakes her head in confusion.

“You know it to be true. You’ve seen me. You’ve seen us.” She puts her hands over Genevieve’s and gives her a sympathetic smile. “Don’t cry. There’s no reason to. Only good things to come, mum. Only good things.”

“But my darling I don’t understand. I’ve been told there are no children. So many times.” she weeps.

“What do they know?” she quips with a smile exactly like Genevieve’s. Full of spark and life and mischief. “Only what YOU know matters.”

Genevieve feels her slipping away, the skies going dark, the light is taken away and she grows soft in her hands. “No, love. Tell me what you mean. Please.” she chokes out as everything fades, left in an empty garden on a new moon night. Only her in the center now, no fountains, no flowers, only Gen and her questions.

She pulls herself out of the deep sleep with a deep breath, rising in her bed. She notices the pain in her stomach immediately, pulling back the covers to reveal she’d started bleeding in her sleep. The relief that hits Genevieve makes her cry. She thanks God and cries happy tears, finally a beam of sun breaks through the gloomy cloud of thoughts that haunted her. She wasn’t pregnant, her body was healing now, regaining its normal functions. She could stop worrying about the past haunting her in that way.

She scrubs her gown, the bed linens luckily not soiled, then soaks herself into a steaming hot bath. The pain was intense and making her dizzy, the heat helped soothe her.

“Christ!” Aggie screeches walking into the bathroom, terror in her face as Gen lazily opens her eyes.

“What is it Ags?” she asks in a daze, trying to breathe through the pain.

“What have you done child?!” she rushes to the tub and tries to drag Gen out.

“Fucks sake Aggie what are you on about?!” Gen raises her voice and smacks her away.

Aggie holds Gen’s arms and lets out a wild sound of relief. “Heavens.” she groans. “I thought you’d tried to bloody kill yourself.” she says with her forearms on the edge of the tub, her head resting with a dark laugh as she feels dizzy from the emotional dips and highs.

Gen looks to see the water reddened, and understands and it makes her smile for a moment. “No, no. Just the menses is all.” she shakes her head.

This perks Aggie up as well, she holds her face. “Oh thank God!” she kisses her cheeks. “Oh that’s...that’s the best news.” she sighs out.

Gen can see now she wasn’t the only one holding onto that terrible fear. “Was my reaction as well.” she gives her a soft smile and she kisses her forehead. “I scrubbed my gown. It’s on the sink there.” she motions with a tired hand. “It hurts something awful though, Ags.” she whines with a wince, resituating herself.

“Is it...are you...alright?” she asks, her hands going stiff.

“If my dreams are any indication I am.” she sighs and leans back against the tub.

“What are you on about?” Aggie's face sits uncertain.

“No hallucinations, no medicine, no worries, Ags.” she responds quickly. “I had one of the children I would see visit me though. Hard to tell what she meant.”

“If she was yours it's no wonder.” Aggie smirks, stroking back Gen’s hair.

“I believe she was.” Gen’s face is frowning in thought, looking to the lavender plant Alfie had gotten her sitting on the window sill still. “She said I was right. That I knew.”

“Knew what?” Aggie pulls a stool next to the tub, delighted Gen was willing to talk about such a thing. Babies had been such a delicate subject for her before.

“I think…” she frowns deeper, looking into the water. “I have no proof, mind you.” She shrugs. “But she told me I knew, and I had suspected before I was taken.”

Aggie stiffens at the mention of it, holding her breath, waiting for tears, for screaming, but they never came.

“I didn’t tell anyone, it wasn’t long enough to cause a fuss over. But I was late before I was taken.”

Aggie's eyes go wide, knowing what she meant. She had been, but like Gen said, it wasn’t enough to think twice about.

“Perhaps she’s what could’ve been...you know?” she says with a sad face turning to meet Aggie’s tearful eyes. It hits Gen’s and her cramps worsen, the sting of tears.

“Oh my love, I’m so sorry.” she whispers and leans in to kiss her damp hair.

“She told me it would be alright.” she wipes away the tears that fall. “I'm inclined to believe her.” she nods. “But if I were...if I had been…” she whispers with a soft voice, almost afraid to say any of it out loud, but feeling lighter as she spoke of it. “That means that I, in fact, can become pregnant.”

“You’ve always worried about that haven’t you?” Aggie adds sympathetically with a knowing glance.

Gen’s honest and wide eyes met hers and she nods quietly. “How did you-?”

“I know you, dear.” she gives a wise smile. “I know your cycles and I know what’s going on behind those big brown eyes more often than you do. I know you’ve worried. After all this time with Alfie as well, and not even an accident despite your new-fangled timing as you call it.”

“I didn’t know if I was lucky, using that method or if it was a sign of something more...serious.” she mutters with a purse of her lips.

Aggie leaves a lingering kiss to her head. “I’m so proud of you, sweetheart.” she whispers into her hair.

“For what?”

“For talking about this. Admitting it. And being so...reasonable about it.”

“I find if I bring up the things that upset me first, I can more easily control myself. It’s the outside factors I still have to worry about. But at least...this is one less thing to weigh on my shoulders.”

“Yes, yes, always look to the positive.”

“Even though it’s never hurt so badly before. Christ.” she groans and winces.

“It’s a woman’s pain to bare.” Aggie nods. “Would you like something to ease it?” she asks with a chirp of happiness for being helpful.

“No, no. I don't...well I can’t really.”

“How about just something to sleep? So you don’t have to feel it at least?” she offers with a shrug.

“I don’t think Alfie would be too happy about coming home to me being dopey.”

“Nonsense. You wouldn’t be. I’d tell him you were menstruating and he’d understand.”

“Oh to live with a man so intimately.” Gen chuckles and it causes her stomach to pain again. “Alright. I can do that. I just don’t want him to look at me with that disappointment any longer. It hurts every time.”

“I know my sweet, he’s had his own problems to deal with as well. It’ll all get back to normal eventually.”

----

“Why is she asleep? It’s the middle of the afternoon?” Claire demands of  Aggie as she takes care of Gen’s gown, wanting to keep the news of her bleeding a secret under Alfie’s orders. He didn’t want anything personal discussed, there were many rumors that were true getting out and he had no idea how still. So the paranoia game was afoot.

“I gave her some tonic.”

“You what?” Claire says angrily.

“No, no, just something for sleep. She started bleeding and it was rather painful so in place of something for that I talked her into something for sleep.”

“Oh, she…” Claire’s shoulders slump and she lets out a sigh. “Oh thank fucking Christ.” she groans and rubs her face.

“My reaction was much the same.” Aggie says happily. “But I think there’s something we should tell Alfie.” she adds with hesitation.

“What?” Claire asks moving in close and speaking in whispers.

“Gen believes herself to have been with child before she was taken.” she whispers with wide eyes and tight lips that show her upset at the news.

“What reasoning?” Claire asks with a raised brow that wasn’t convinced.

“She was late. Not much but…” she shrugs. “And she says her dreams are telling her she knows. And she’d thought she might be.”

“All that blood.” Claire’s face contorts.

“Yes.” Aggie lets out a noise of upset. “Should we tell Alfie? It was his after all.”

Claire shakes her head. “No. Absolutely not.” she barks in a confident voice.

“Why not? Wouldn’t you want to know?”

“It will serve no one now. It’ll only bring upset to the house again. He’d dig up that monster and kill him all over again. You can’t tell him.” she glares at Aggie who’s disappointed but nods in agreement. “We also have no proof. And neither does she. It could not even be true. Just her mind wanting her to feel better now, her working through all this you know? Could always be nothing.” she states with a self-assured nod. Claire wasn’t as quick to believe Gen’s dreams as Aggie was. Was a key difference in how they handled things. “It doesn’t matter whether it was or wasn’t. I’m happy and relieved she’s bleeding now, that’s all that matters. He’ll be plenty eased by it as well. These things are women's troubles after all. We must bare them among ourselves. And this is one of those things. Don’t. Tell. Him.” she states coldly.

“I won’t. I won’t.” Aggie agrees. “But I would want to know.” she retorts.

“Well, you aren’t him. He’s on edge enough as is. And I don’t need him becoming a bigger problem than he already is. People are asking about Gen for work, and I don’t want to have to start making up things or pushing her back into it. But it’s starting to get to me.” she admits and sighs.

“She did so well today. Talking about what happened and even mentioning being… kidnapped. She didn’t seem too bothered aside from stray tears. She spoke very clearly and reasonably. I believe she’ll be well enough to return to work soon. I have faith in her.”

“As do I.” Claire agrees with a half-hearted tone. “It’s everyone else I”m worried about.” she frowns.

--------------

Alfie had been dealing with much the same outside of the house. Gossip and rumors galore kept making their way back to him. Some were ridiculous. Those were easy to ignore and dispel, it was the oddly accurate ones that bothered him. It made him on edge in his own home, which made him furious. He didn’t trust anyone, and it led to him being short and cruel to the staff. But at this point, his mood swings were seen as regular, something to expect and look past, he was becoming more difficult to deal with than the one that was expected to act out.

Most recently he’d lashed out in a meeting with a civilian. A simple question of how Gen was doing lead him to accuse him of being up to something. His hand twitching over his drawer with the gun and the man sweating bullets across the desk in his innocence.

“I meant nothin’ by it Mr. Solomons, only heard she’d been down after someone kidnapped her, poor girl. She hadn’t been seen out at her usual functions, my wife told me she wasn’t teaching currently. Thought it best to ask is all.” He stutters out and Alfie's nose twitches, not seeing any ill will in the man’s face.”

“Right.” He draws out, hand returning to the top of his desk as he rubbed his chin. “She’s doing better. Slow process with women and that, yeah? You remember how the younger boys were in the war. Similar to that. But she’s much improved and working again.” He gives the man a nod and returns his eyes to the contract in front of him. “So you can spread that around, right? She’s back to work, studying for her bat mitzvah with the Rabbi. Busy little bee again.”

The man nods supportively, eyes darting and not meeting Alfies face as it still read as angry. “I didn’t mean to pry, sir.”

“No, no. It’s just y’know...people fuckin talk 'bout what they don’t fuckin’ know nothin’ bout yeah?”

“Course sir. I’ve heard nothing but nice things about Your Miss Durand.”

“You’d be the only fuckin one.” He grumbles, hand to his brow before he grunts and returns back to the business at hand.

Afterward, a hesitant Ollie gives him a sympathetic look.

“Don’t fuckin’ look at me like that boy.” He snaps at him as he pops his back in his chair and makes a pained face.

“Sir-“

“Fuckin...NO.” He shakes his head and glares. “I know what ya fuckin did yeah? Sure as fuck don’t need you to point it out. Like I don’t fuckin know.”

“I thought maybe you could do something to bring down the talk?”

“And what fuckin brilliant idea, that I have not thought of already so you suggest?” He groans.

“Perhaps with Miss Durand doing better you could take her out... y’know if people see she’s alive and well they won’t be as inclined to start rumors.”

“Oh! I hadn’t thought of that Ollie!” He answers sarcastically and Ollie sighs, knowing a berating is coming. “And what happens when one of those cunts brings up what happened? What will she do when they say his name, even have the fuckin bollocks or ignorance to ASK what happened? You think she’s ready for that? Because she’s fucking not. She’ll crack and do...who fuckin knows what! Kill someone? Who the fuck knows!” He shouts, rising from his chair.

“Yes, sir.” Ollie answers, looking down to the floor.

“Fuckin daft.” He bites with a slap of his hand to the desk. “Speakin' of I am goin' home after doin' my rounds. See what madness I’ll inherit today.” He mutters as he stomps out of his office.

————

Gen’s taking a nap before tea when Alfie comes home. Claire greets him and her face tells him nothing horrendous happened that day.

“How is she?” the same question, the same gruff way every day.

“She’s been very well. We’ve been working or trying to. She’s still a bit slow, but she’s improving. It’s the memory she’s struggling with now. The names and who people are, she’s getting frustrated with herself but she’s taken it in stride.” her voice is light-hearted and she explains the day with small shrugs and hand movements to accompany her.

Gen had heard Alfie’s car coming up the drive and pulls on a robe to greet him, she finds him and Claire in mid-conversation as she stalls her entry into the entryway and eavesdrops.

“Good. Good. All good. I don’t know if I could’ve taken bad news today.” Alfie says with a sigh.

“I have none as far as she’s concerned.” Claire says with a nod.

“What’s that mean?”

“You know. Outwardly issues.” she gestures vaguely.

“Fuckin’ tell me ‘bout it right? These fuckin’ cunts... runnin’ their fuckin’ mouths ‘bout her. ‘Bout us.” Gen can hear the anger bubbling in his voice as he speaks.

“Yes the clients are getting antsy it seems. They want the personal touch back, the store owners want to know they’re still being heard and they’ll have roofs over their head come next payment.” Claire groans.

“The absolutely ridiculous things I’ve heard, yeah?” he rubs his temple. “From her being dead to pregnant to comatose. Without her out there, they’re runnin’ wild and taking all liberties with it. With her not even takin up her volunteer work they’ve been particularly fussy it seems. What the fuck do they know about anythin’.” he rolls his eyes, hands on his hips.

“Yes, I’ve been asked so many off questions about her. I tell them the same. She's getting better and working from home now. Back on her feet, waiting for the right moment to enter back into her former life.”

“Seems they wanted that months back. Cunts.” he grunts and shifts his feet. “Greedy little wankers, yeah? Can’t let a woman have her peace. And bringin’ me into it! Sayin’ I’m afraid she’ll get taken again and I”m keepin’ her locked up. What a load of bollocks.”

‘Yes, they are all rather...tremendous in their imaginations when it comes to this sort of thing.” Claire's mouth goes into a straight line in annoyance.

Gen steps back, a hurt expression that she feels into her chest is clear on her face. She was making their lives harder. She wasn’t getting better fast enough for them or for the public. She’d been trying so hard as well. Pushing herself and trying to improve, but it seems just as she was feeling good about her progress, there was news to make her feel less than again.

This of course only led to her pushing herself harder. Claire and Alfie both saw it and thought it was her stubborn nature coming back. The problem with it was she was going too hard, too fast and it was doing more harm than good. She’d study her Hebrew until her nose bled and she couldn’t see, knocking her out with a migraine for days and making her useless. She’d exercise to get her strength back in the gardens and pull something, twist her weakened ankle and be down again for even longer. A miserable sight to behold when she was incapacitated because she was so intent on getting better she couldn’t emotionally handle the setbacks gracefully. She was as miserable as Alfie when they happened and neither spoke much. Alfie finally intervenes when he finds her sobbing one afternoon. Inquiring as to what’s upset her as she kneels by the toilet, making herself sick with her thoughts.

“I wanted to be able to face what happened. To remember and know...so that when it was discussed it wouldn’t ruin me.” she groans with exhausted eyes and a scratchy voice.

“Not go well?” he asks, pushing back her hair.

“I was okay with Aggie, but then new things started coming back to me and it just...it’s all so much. And so...bad.” she moans as her stomach turns again.

“You've got to slow it down, love. You’re pushin’ too hard. I was lettin’ you go at what pace you liked but you know right?” he inquired, kneeling by her now.

“No. I'm not. I”m behind.” she sighs out, hands over he face.

“There is no schedule for such a thing. Therefore you cannot be behind.” he states matter of factly.

“Everyone thinks so.”

“Not true.” he insists with pursed lips and a coddling voice.

“Don’t lie to me.” she scowls. He’s almost happy to see it as he knows she is getting back to her old self. “I know you and everyone else thinks I’m broken and I need to prove I’m not. I-”

“But if you keep pushing so hard that you have continued setbacks you lose progress and time.” he explains. “Like a business. Ya got to give them time off to recoup after work. Can’t just make ‘em work round the clock, they’d all fall over dead, wouldn’t they? Same with you.” he points. “Gotta give yourself room to breathe, relax, recuperate. If you do that your progress will be more continuous.” he speaks in plain terms, one hand on her knee.

“But I’m so tired of being like this.” she whispers, he can see her frustration on her face.

“I know love but it’s all part of it innit? Let nature take its course. You are clearly improving, and that in itself is something to be thankful for yeah? Let's not push our luck.” he gives her knee a little squeeze.

“If I have any left.” she rolls her eyes and lets her head fall back against the wall. “I don’t mean to be such a burden.”

“Ya not.” he insists. “Now let's get you into bed, yeah? I’ll have ya tea brought in. How’s ‘bout I read to ya? Haven’t done that in ages. Ya won’t have to work that pretty little head of yours wif ‘at, eh?” he offers and she gives him a weak smile. It had been so long since they’d been close and done such a thing together. He was offering to help her, possibly out of pity or bribery but it didn’t matter so much to Genevieve. She just needed a break.

----------

With increasing pressure from outside, Alfie is feeling the stress of Genevieve and her reputation slipping away. She had been absent for months, but she had also been through a hell of a lot. Without telling exactly what it was, it was understood that people would speculate. But after being taken and held by a man with a reputation like Horne, you’d think people could make a fairly accurate guess. That’s what he’d done. And he found personally, her recovery to be fantastic. But professionally it was a huge thorn in his side. He wasn’t in control of it, and he did NOT like not having control. Therefore resentment built. He’s still polite, he’s still careful with her, but there’s a barrier between them neither want to address. And Gen is desperately trying to make it disappear before it too becomes a real issue.

SO when Gen suggests they go out for a night. Just stop to his club, a little appearance to knock the rust off, you’d think he would be delighted. But he wasn’t. He was suspicious and pessimistic and he wasn’t shy to let her know that.

“I don’t fink it’s a good idea, love. How ‘bout you stick to work for now, eh?” he offers first, a scapegoat to keep her busy.

“Alfie I need to get out and be social again. It was the majority of what I used to do. I know people think I’ve gone mad out here or...whatever else. I need to try to remember how to do this.” her voice is pleading but he does not budge.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea Genny. I don’t think you’re ready. Socializing is its own game. You know that. I don’t want it to overwhelm you.” he puts as delicately as he can.

“I think I'm ready.” she pouts. “It won’t be an event, I won’t be speaking, we’ll just….go out.”

He side-eyes her, looking up from his book as she sits like a sad little kitten wanting attention.

“Please?” she offers with a bow of her head.

“I don’t want you havin' an episode in public, Gen. We can’t have that right now.” is his way of warning her.

“I haven’t had one in weeks. At the worst, I cry. And I can hide that. Excuse myself. Whichever. We can hide in your office if need be.”

“I don’t want to have to do that because that in itself is suspicious.”

She sighs and groans, shoulders slumping. “How will we know if I don’t try?” she offers up. “If it goes well it would do wonders for my confidence.”

His lips form a tight line and his nose twitches. “If you so much as feel your heart go faster you tell me. We can’t-” he scolds.

“THANK YOU!” she moans, leaning forward and kissing his cheek. “I won’t. It’ll be brilliant.” she speaks quickly and rises with her skirt in her hands. “Thank you, darling. Truly.” she dotes with a lovely smile he wants to give back to her as she dashes out of the room, but he doesn’t feel as optimistic as she does.

--------

It was a lovely sight to take in once again for Alfie, Genevieve in her best and decorated like a doll. He gives in to drinking in the sight of her as she emerges from their bedroom as if they’d had the good fortune of never having gone through the past few months.

“You look lovely.” He coos with a gentle tone, a kiss to her cheek as she’s given her handbag and shawl before they depart. He sees a blush to her face, thankfulness for his kind attention that gives away how starved she was for him to be soft and affectionate with her again. He feels guilt stir heavy in his stomach as she bravely ventures out of the house for the first time since coming back from the hospital. However, his reservations for the bold steps she practically demanded he take we’re keeping him reserved and far from the loving and complimenting man she’d fallen for. Alfie was still in business mode, she could tell by his tight jaw and stone-cold eyes that held no warmth for anyone.

She feels so very vulnerable. Far more than she anticipated. Everyone stared, whispered and turned to speak of her arrival en masse. It was bringing up a lot of suppressed reservations she’d pushed through to get herself to this point and making her confidence falter. Something that made her feel very much unlike herself. This is where the trouble began.

Alfie studied her with such precision, down to checking the pulse in her neck and the shine of perspiration on her skin for signals she was weakening. He was not going to let her break down the last of the normalcy he’d built for her in her absence.

The nerve, the gall, the bollocks on the cunts that dare ask her so boldly of her experiences. He assumed it was all from malice and a grotesque need to gawk at the woman who had the poor misfortune of being beaten and abused. Although some asked for pure ignorance of knowing anything of the trauma, a curiosity born from the boredom of their mundane and cushioned loves that knew nothing of the sort. But Alfie's anger burned like the fires that destroyed Horne’s businesses that day for what they were doing to her. She could only take so much until she broke.

“I had heard he was artful in his brutality with women. Did you find it such?” one spectacularly posh, old money hag insinuated with a nasty smirk and a pull of her long cigarette holder.

Gen gulps and chokes mildly. She didn’t expect someone to be nasty enough to ask. But the rich weren’t known for their tact. “He… umm…” Gen begins to feel light-headed, sweat forming and her throat closing,  with tears building fast.

“Alfie.” She squeaks with a death grip on his arm, nails digging into the fabric and entirely not subtle. No part of her reaction was and the part that angered him the most in the moment was the old cunts nerve to try to get a reaction from a broken woman. “I believe I need some air.” She strains with a shamed and lowered gaze that wouldn’t meet his, a single tear escaping and his need to protect his image overtakes all else.

“If you would excuse us. She’s not accustomed to such intrusive blatant rudeness from the type of person who should fucking know better. You should be ashamed of yourself.” He spits as he turns her and gives Gen no option but to head towards his office. The woman is offended and leaves with her feathers ruffled and mouth agape with shock at his retort.

With the click of a closed-door Gen breaks, leaning on his desk and wheezing, her heart feeling like it might burst, breathing being the hardest thing to do while he body tingled and felt numb. She was crying but not voluntarily, her back bowing and heaving as she loudly fell apart.

Alfie with no gentleness turns her to face him and with a cool tone and hard face, he informs her of how to correct herself.

“Breathe in through your nose and out your mouth. Count it out.” He nods as she comes down, her body shaking under his hands on her upper arms. “Like the doctor said. 1,2,3,4. 1,2,3,4,5,6,7.” He counts for her and finds her responding better. “She was only trying to get a rise out of you. Old gossipin’ mare.” He grumbles and lets her go, handing her his handkerchief. “There now. Dry your eyes. Need to look presentable as we leave. Like nothin’ happened, right?” He orders, looking towards the door with a hard brow, no thought to coddle her at all crosses his mind. He could only think of how he told her this would happen and how he’d have to deal with the consequences now. Entirely avoidable but no… she’d had to get her way.

She feels sick on the ride home. A thick and heavy silence in the car, feeling like a young child being punished. She hides her tears of sadness, no longer from panic as they roll down her cheeks silently. As they enter her home his mood does not change, and he begins speaking to one of the maids as Gen begins readying herself for bed.

“Just...keep someone with her now. At all times, yeah. This didn’t go well and she’s not stable yet.”

“Alfie that really isn’t necessary.” She adds in meekly, taking off her jewelry.

He ignores her and continues, her tears growing heavier in her eyes by the second. “Don’t let her make any business decisions, yeah? She’s not herself. Can’t be trusted with things of any significance.” He speaks as if she isn’t standing right there and anger of her own bubbles to the surface.

“Alfie!” She demands with balled fists.

“Wot?” He groans with an annoyed face, showing no other emotion as it meets hers and her heart aches.

“Why are you doing this? It was only a minor set back.” She stutters out as the sadness builds on her chest.

“Because I fuckin told you dinnit I?” He head tilts with aggression. “Like a little brat, ya had to get ya way.”

“I don’t need to be watched. I don’t need that, I-I-...” she chokes a bit, her back stiffening straight as tears bring the black mascara and liner down her round cheeks. His face holds no sympathy and she hurts so deeply it brings out a sob. “Why are you being so HARD on me?!” She demands with a shrill voice trembling with shame.

“Because I can't have you fuckin up, can I?” He spits back to meet her rise in emotion. “I gotta be fuckin scared you’ll hurt yourself. Your body, your business, MY business.” He speaks aggressively with his hands towards her. “You could hurt yaself, someone else or do something bloody stupid with your judgment right now.” A harsh delivery does nothing to soften the words of the same that cut her in a far more painful way that Horne ever did. “I’ve gotta worry that everyone will see how bad you actually are, yeah? Like they almost did tonight?” He takes slow steps towards her and his tone is belittling. “...and ruin your reputation?” He asks her closer now, ignoring the tears and wringing hands of the woman he loved, no longer her Ari but that Alfie Solomons of Camden that everyone warned her about.

“I-I…” She stutters, unable to defend herself from her own injury and pure shock and betrayal. “You’re being so ...so ….MEAN.” She breaks and begins to cry harder, trying so hard to meet his heartless eyes that gave her nothing of the man she knew.

“No, I’m being perfectly realistic, sweetie.” He barks back. “I’m just dealing with this in me own way, yeah? Don’t expect you to understand it.” He taps his temple condescendingly. “Cause I fuckin TOLD YOU this would happen yeah? I fuckin TOLD YOU you weren’t ready.” His brow his low and hard and shows the worry he’s carried the past months for those outside of their conversation. “Because you can’t handle what the fuck is going on out there yet.” He points to the window behind her but she flinches as his arms extend and instead of shame he feels only anger for her weakness in their heated state. “I’m fuckin stressed, right? I’m fuckin worried and workin' me arse off to control everything you've been so adamantly been trying to fuck back up!” He shouts and she cowers like a scolded child. “I have enough to worry about with me own shit. I don’t want to have to deal with another’s. I don’t. Because I want me home to be a place of calm, of refuge and I’ve been comin' home to a fuckin circus for months and I’m fuckin tired, Genevieve.” He groans and rubs his face. “I don’t need this extra worry. I don’t take it well!” He states obviously and raises his arms out to his sides to show his true self. “This is why I never married before. This type of shite. There’s no room for it in a life like ours.” He speaks freely now, and far too honest for the situation. “This is how I deal yeah? This is how I’m trying to control all ...THIS.” He waves his hands to her.

When he stops with flared nostrils and looks in her eyes he feels nothing in that moment. Everything coming to a head between them, it was inevitable.

“IM FUCKING TRYING!” She screams and it surprises him. The raw anger from her clenched teeth and shaking hands that were wet with tears and stained with her makeup from wiping her eyes.

“WELL STOP FUCKIN TRYIN!” He screams back and her lip trembles like a toddler.

She takes a step back and holds her chest, physically wounded from his words and actions.

“You’re not supposed to be trying, you’re supposed to be gettin' better!” His voice lowers but still spits venom in her vulnerable state. “You’re supposed to be  HEALING  not pushing yourself so you keep getting worse!” He hisses again with outstretched hands and he might as well have struck her for how she was gawking at him. “I don’t want to have to worry about you Genny!” he bellows out and slumps, a long sigh coming from deep in his chest. “I want this to be over.” He moans. “And what you’re doing isn’t how we get past this.” His voice drops as he sees the betrayal on her face. The hurt and hate and fear he’d caused.

She doesn’t try to talk. She only sobs into her dress she’d brought up to cover her face. He steps closer to try to comfort her and she shoves him away with one hand blindly. The other clutched, white-knuckled into the gown that was now drying her tears since he wouldn’t.

“Don’t touch me!” A screech from her haggard throat shouts as she slaps at the air between them. “If I’m such a burden then, GO! Go on then! Anything further you see from me tonight will only lead to more disappointment.” she shouts and turns from him, quickly wiping her face.

“Gen, I-“

“GO!” Screams and bends over at the waist, bent in half from heartache. “There is NOTHING you can say to make me want to face you.” She speaks powerfully, a hand extended to her side with a pointed finger to show the determination of her words since her broken voice could not.

“As you wish.” He says with a defeated posture, backing out of the room and heading back to his place of refuge of his old room.

She sobs until she throws up, pushing everyone away that tried to console her. She loudly proclaimed she needed no one and nothing over and over as she sobbed into her pillows and demanded to be left alone. She cried herself to sleep like a child. She rests deeply despite the heart that ached in her chest. But a power rises, a beauty in her breakdown of strength and self-assurance. If no one else believed in her, she’d just have to believe in herself. Alfie has proven she couldn’t have others handle her problems. She had to take control back. She had to get her life back.

———-

He sneaks in during the wee hours of the morning despite Aggie begging him not to. He pads along in the silk pajamas she’d bought him, tired and naked feet on the imported overlapping jewel-toned rugs towards her sleeping form.

She hears him enter, she would always know his footsteps by sound alone and she lays still and quiet. Seething at his nerve to show up the same night. She didn’t need to be coddled by him. Not anymore.

He gets into bed with the woman he does love. Even if he has an ass-backward way of showing it. He knows he was too heavy-handed, but he didn’t handle delicate and intimate matters well. He was business, not all heart. This love and devotion thing was as new and hard to navigate for him as it was her. But even in her less than 100% state she was still handling it far better than he was.

His hand reaches out in the dark. Calloused fingers to her back lightly as he sighs. They run down her spine, over the soft fabric of her gown, feeling her hair cascaded down with it over her feminine form. “I’m sorry, Gen.” he forces out in a breathy whisper into the dark. He feels her move, knowing she was awake even before, only having it solidifying his thought. She says nothing, no sigh, no grunt or sniffle. Only silence beside the sound of his own blood rushing in his ears in the darkness. “‘Spose I deserve that.” He admits quietly with a heavy thud of his hand against the bed and into the expanse between them. Both fall back asleep, dreaming of the other. Both complicated and distorted just as their lives on the other side of waking were now as well. Tomorrow would be more tests and trials, and they would both have to decide how to mend the parts of themselves they were still both so unsure of, their hearts.

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