#akjshdhsjshdbdj

[caeloservare]

@clockwork---heart sent: "...I wish you had someone you felt safe being vulnerable around, too."

Oscar says gently, knowing full well how stressed James had been lately. Just because he acted like a kid-he felt safe enough near James to act his metaphysical age- didn't mean he was unable to tell James wasn't doing his best. Wizard could point out his nervous tics with ease, actually.

James froze in his steps, and only then he realised that he was pacing around his office again. Horror clutched at his chest, making it hard to breathe for a moment, but quickly he sucked in a sharp breath, making his body functional again.

Was he that obvious?

Was he slipping so badly?

"I don't-..." need anyone? What a blatant lie. He would give up his entire current life and walk barefoot into the southern wilds, if he got to meet someone there. Anyone. Someone he could trust, just spend his time with and be himself. Just himself, nothing more.

But then he would be leaving all of this on people he cared for. People that trusted him. He couldn't betray them like that. Couldn't turn his back and leave, couldn't put all that burden on them.

"... I'm sorry." He muttered and took a deep breath. Indeed, he was doing poorly, but he was doing and he will keep doing however possible for as long as needed. "I didn't intend to make you worry."