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#aka the day her human mother got the greatest gift she could wish for: her daughter
writerfae · 1 year
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Maya fact if the day #27
It’s her birthday today! :)
@vampywriter @saphoblin @my-cursed-prince
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phddis · 2 years
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Intro Post
Hi, I'm Max (24, she/they, gmt+1), if you wanna plot with good old Charles like this post or send me a message xx
character’s full name: Charles Francisco Xavier character’s nickname: Professor X, old friend Age: 43 MBTI: infj zodiac sign: Aquarius powers: omega level telepathy
Physical appearance
Height: 1,78m Body build: lean, strong shoulder strength Shape of face: angular Eye color:  dark brown Glasses or contacts:  glasses when working, usually toys with it if not working Distinguishing marks: days old beard, kind eyes Predominant features: greasy hair Hair color: brown Type of hair: straight, curly at back of neck Hairstyle: often let down, strands stuck behind his ears, will sometimes tie it up when it gets too long Voice: clear and calm Physical disabilities: paraplegy (both legs paralyzed), needs a wheelchair to move around Usual fashion of dress: old man style Jewelry or accessories: always his Swiss watch on his right wrist, a hairtie next to it
Personality
Good personality traits: empathetic, generous, loyal Bad personality traits: manipulative, secretive, stubborn Mood character is most often in: tired but contempt Sense of humor: bright and sarcastic with his close friends Character’s greatest joy in life: knowing he was able to help others, no matter the way Character’s greatest fear: being responsible for someone's death Why? I don't think the worse would be the guilt, honestly, it might be the fact that other people's opinion about him could change Character is most at ease when: teaching, sleeping Most ill at ease when:  his team is off fighting, he has to debate in public with morons Enraged when: injustice happens under his nose Depressed or sad when: stuck in a loop about his past or hearing a student of the school talk about their own shitty past Priorities: the school aka all his kids' safety (he's a father of hundreds yes) Life philosophy: "you have to die a few times before you can really live" If granted one wish, it would be: for durable universal peace Why? so he could get a good night sleep once and for all Greatest strength: the fact he truly believes peace can happen between mutants and humans Greatest vulnerability or weakness: his kids Biggest regret: not opening the school earlier Biggest accomplishment: opening the school
Past
Hometown: New York Type of childhood: very privileged but also very lonely, would spend ages without seeing his parents and had no close relationship with them (or anyone for that matter); quite estranged from his childhood and doesn't like remembering it Pets: none Most important childhood memory: his last birthday celebrated with his father, right before his death Childhood hero: Noam Chomsky Dream job: owning an ice cream empire Education: went to Harvard and Oxford, got PHDs in genetics, biology and biophysics, as well as a doctorate in psychology
Present 
Current location: still his family mansion at Westchester, which he transformed into a sanctuary for mutants, he also has a flat near the Columbia University where he teaches thrice a week. Religion: atheist Occupation: Professor of genetics, advocate for mutant rights, Headmaster of his school of gifted kids Finances: wealthy as fuck
Family
Mother: Sharon Xavier Relationship with her: very conflicted, she was a violent woman who went through hardships, and Charles was often at the end of her wrath. Died alone and drowning in alcohol, she truly fucked him up Father: Brian Xavier Relationship with him: Charles' father died when he was still quite young, and the memories he has of him are pretty nice, He was one of Charles' childhood heroes and he made him fall in love with science Siblings: depends uwu Spouse: none Children: none that he knows of for the moment
Habits
Hobbies: reading/writing, playing chess,doing research Plays a musical instrument?  learned piano and cello as a kid Plays a sport? not really, does exercise when he has time though How he/she would spend a rainy day: either catching up on paperwork or gossiping with the kids in the common room Smokes: not anymore Drinks: has a few glasses of whatever's in his cabinet every day, used to get completely trashed during the day but had to stop, will get completely trashed whenever possible Other drugs: not anymore What does he do too much of? worrying What does he do too little of? sleeping, eating well, resting Usual body posture: leaned on his side, elbow on an armrest and chin resting in his palm
Thanks for taking the time to read everything!!
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brigdh · 7 years
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Yuletide recs, for fandoms A-M! I have just barely gotten this in before author reveals, and clearly still have half the alphabet to get through. Ah, well. First off, my own gift!! Water Lens Benjamin January, gen, 2.4k, Teen. “The good widow couldn't dump you in the fast section of the river, apparently,” January said. “It had to be the mud.” “If she'd only panicked five minutes earlier,” Rose agreed with a sigh. “We were on the bridge then – although given the state of that particular river I wouldn't necessarily put money on it being that much cleaner.” All my all favorite story tropes are here: bathing together and playing with hair and the OT3 and Rose doing science and there’s even a mystery to solve in here too! It is wonderful and I love it and everyone should give the mystery author more kudos. And here are my other favorites: so come home 12 Dancing Princesses fairy tale, gen, 21.5k, G. A detective is called to a space station to solve the mystery of whether--and how--twelve astronauts are accessing the surface of a forbidden planet. A very well-written sci-fi murder mystery, with great worldbuilding and characters. Recruits American Gods, Mr Wednesday and Mad Sweeney, 4.2k, G. The Norse god of battle and a mad Irish king walk into a bar. This is not a joke, my son: except in a sense, it is. They are Old Gods, it’s the New World, and the game must be kept going. Really great backstory on the gods in WWI. The Locust And I Awoke and Found Me Here on the Cold Hill's Side - James Tiptree Jr., 2.2k, Mature. Letter of Fr. Francisco Nadal to Fr. Bartolomeo Strozzi, 1588. The original short story is about the horrifying effects on humanity of alien sexuality; this fic translates it into Imperial Spain and makes the different cultural setting really work. Because everyone needs some terror on Christmas! And on the seventh... Aubrey-Maturin Series - Patrick O'Brian, Jack/Stephen, 11k, G. This decision might be considered the luckiest, as standing near Jack meant that Stephen was not alone in his fall overboard. Or it might be considered the unluckiest, as standing near Jack meant that Stephen was foremost in the splinters' path, when the ranging shot abruptly found its range. Desert island fic with H/C, angst, kissing in the ocean, and new species of birds. AKA, everything good in fic. And for that riches where is my deserving? Benjamin January mysteries, Ben/Rose/Hannibal, 1.8k, Teen. If Ben was honest with himself, he suspected that one day Hannibal might simply vanish from their lives. He desperately hoped that this was not the day. Delicious Hannibal whump plus the OT3! What more could anyone want out of the tiny fandom of my heart? Family Gathering Books of the Raksura, Moon-focused, 2.8k, G. After some of Jade and Moon's first clutch are confirmed to be Royal Aeriat, Pearl wants the fledgelings brought to her bower. Ember thinks Moon should be there too. Really adorable baby-fic, with some lovely Pearl characterization. Home Books of the Raksura, Consolation gen, 4.1k, G. It turned out that living like people instead of monsters required all sorts of skills and tools. Cleaning required soap, and some inkling of how to apply it. Consolation’s flight, having been raised by monsters, not people, had none of the requisite skills. This is the post-canon fic about how Consolation learns to be a person that was my greatest wish for Christmas, and it's everything I could have hoped for. Mordre, She Wroot Canterbury Tales, Wife of Bath-focused, 8k, G. At least one pilgrim will not make it to Canterbury. Yes, you ABSOLUTELY DO need the Wife of Bath solving murders in your life. Just trust me on this. Underworlds: The Life and Afterlife of Richard Upton Pickman Cthulhu mythos, gen, 3.7k, G. Explore the life, works and enduring influence of Richard Upton Pickman, a controversial artist of the early 20th century. This exhibition includes several paintings never before displayed in public, including all of Pickman's graphic, unsettling "horrors" currently remaining in North America. The Boston Globe called Underworlds "stomach-turning food for thought"— but decide for yourself! Young children may find Pickman's paintings frightening; parents are advised to consider carefully before allowing them to proceed. This program serves as a guide to the exhibit. Audio versions for your mobile phone are available at the Parrington museum website. Such a well-done pastiche of a museum guide to a series of horrifying paintings. What Is Begotten The Eagle of the Ninth, Marcus/Esca, 7.5k, Teen. Esca learns the Latin word by accident, from Stephanos of all people. Soul-mate. A soulmate AU with an absolutely lovely take on the canon. Of Devils and Other Fine Things Fallen London, The Wistful Deviless/Zee-Captain, 1.1k, G. Wooing a devil can only end in tears. Really fantastic interpretation of what a relationship with a devil really means. head above water Gattaca, Jerome-focused, 1.2k, G. “Do you know,” Jerome’s mother asks his coach, “how Jerome first started swimming? Did he ever tell you that story?” Absolutely wonderful backstory for Jerome. Suspect Gattaca, Anton Freeman-focused, 1.8k, G. Five things Anton thought upon seeing Vincent was a suspect for murder (and one thing he said). Lovely character study on a minor part of the movie, this feel so right. Attempt #534: The One With The Bees The Good Place, Chidi/Eleanor, 8k, Explicit. “Eleanor!” Chidi looks even more upset as he blurts out, “The universe doesn’t want us to have sex, okay?” Eleanor chokes. “I’m sorry, what?” In which Eleanor and Chidi repeatedly try – and fail – to have sex. Totally hilarious, and also hot. Care and Feeding of Your Janet The Good Place, Janet-focused, 1.2k, Teen. Please read this guide carefully before activating your Janet. So, so, so funny. Operation: Seduce Michael The Good Place, Michael/Everyone, 2.3k, Teen. If at first you don't succeed, send a different cockroach. Really hilarious fic about the plan to seduce Michael, with pitch-perfect character voices and humor just like the show's. so slip your hand inside of my glove The Handmaiden, Hideko/Sook-hee, 2.6k, Teen. Hideko lets Sook-hee teach her how to distinguish sapphire from spinel and obediently bites the gold Sook-hee brings back to her. Hideko and Sook-hee, after. A post-canon fic that is beautiful and just perfection. Who's Got Who The Hateful Eight, Chris Mannix/Marquis Warren, 6.7k, Explicit. Warren makes inventive use of Mannix's sheriff star. And, for that matter, inventive use of Mannix. He thinks that will be the end of it. You know, as much as love Hateful Eight, I never expected to begin shipping Mannix/Warren. What can I say but that this fandom has some damn good writers? And they know their porn; good lord this one is hot. As Ice in the Desert Historical RPF, Richard I "The Lionheart" of England/Saladin, 2.3k, Teen. Saladin visits Richard's sickbed with fruit, and a question in his eyes. Gorgeously written, really some of the most beautiful descriptions I've read in quite a while. Two people on the opposite sides of the Crusades in a moment of peace. all the nameless that keeps us rising despite IT, Stan/Richie/Beverly, 4k, Teen. When Stan went over to Richie’s house after dinner to tutor him for their math test tomorrow he thought he knew exactly what he was signing up for. Beautiful depiction of loss and love and a game of spin-the-bottle. Epilogue Jane Eyre, Jane-focused, 3.4k, Mature. Not everything, Jane learns early on, is real. Deeply creepy alternative interpretation of the canon. I love this possibility. How Else Would Sailing Ships Ever Have Navigated? Jeeves, Madeline Bassett/Honoria Glossop, 2.3k, G. “Do you think,” Madeline said to Honoria as the more impressive parts of nature gradually crept up upon them, “that all daffodils are the daughters of sunlight?” Absolutely adorable fic for some minor characters with a pitch-perfect tone for the canon. the worlds that spin beyond our atmosphere Jupiter Ascending, Jupiter/Caine, 7.8k, Teen. When Jupiter woke up, there was a small metal sphere on the pillow beside her. She blinked at it, because it certainly had not been there when she had gone to bed the night before. Then Aunt Nino began to stir and grumble as she too woke up and Jupiter snatched up the sphere, lobbing it hastily into her half-packed suitcase on her way to go and make the coffee. In which Jupiter is propositioned by a space travel agency (but fancier!) and introduces Caine to her family. Gorgeous worldbuilding and wonderful expansion of the canon. I love the descriptions of other planets in here. Damsel King Arthur (2017), Arthur/The Mage, 3k, Teen. In which there's a girl, a dragon, and a castle, and Arthur resolves not to let the truth get in the way of a good story. Totally hilarious and a great fit with the canon. Those parts, which maids keep unespy'd Kushiel's Legacy, Phedre/Joscelin, 1.9k, Explicit. There are few things Phedre has never done. There's one she's never done with Joscelin. Wonderful hot and sweet fic. Het anal, which is rare to see in fanfiction, but so very well-done here. Midwinter Queen The Lion in Winter, Henry/Eleanor, 1.6k, G. Christmas at Chinon, 1183. Conversation gambits keep the Christmas fires burning. Cynical and regretful and funny and heavy, this story does a better job of capturing the voice of the canon than almost any I've read. By Degrees Mansfield Park, Mary Crawford/Fanny Price, 16.6k, Mature. Her conscience had been disturbed, and she could no longer dislike Mary Crawford enough to be safe from her, if such a thing had ever been possible at all. Really excellent slow-burn for one of my favorite Austen ships, and the Fanny characterization is just ideal. Canada Gold Mean Girls, Regina George/Janis Ian, 3.9k, Teen. Regina joined the CIA to catch bad guys. Unfortunately, this time, that meant she had to work with Janis. Yeah, so it turns out that the thing that's been missing from my life is Mean Girls f/f rival spies future-fic. I am so, so glad that this story exists because it's amazing.
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amintyworld · 4 years
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Official Reference Sheet for My DnD Gem Quest Party!
Hey guys, Minty here! I know I’ve posted a lot about my Gem Quest Campaign DnD Party, but I’ve never really explained their characters, or even the party NPCs, so this post will be a reference to that for anyone interested who wants to learn more about them! I may do a separate one for the villains if enough people are interested. Anyway, enjoy!
Also, don’t mind sending in a ask or two about them if you’re curious, I’m more than happy to answer! <3
Mind that this does contain spoilers for the campaign as a whole!
(TW: Abuse, Death, Abandonment, murder, homophobia, amnesia. Let me know if I should tag anything else!)
Scepter (Wizard/Monk, Aasimar, PC):
Family/Allies: Dawn, Goddess of the Light (Birth Mother), Abaddon (Birth Father, Assigned Guardian), Alan (Half-Brother, Guardian), Penelope (Step-Mother), Butler (Close friend), Del (Monk Teacher)
Backstory: Scepter was born the child of the Light Goddess, Dawn, and Abaddon, her mortal lover in an attempt to create a heir to take Dawn’s place as the poison Goddess Talona gave her slowly kills her. After his birth, they quickly realize he’s not immortal, and therefore not a suitable heir to replace Dawn. Despite Dawn’s protests, they send him to the Mortal Plane to live with his father, Abaddon. While Scepter grows up in a very fortunate and wealthy lifestyle due to his father’s black-market jobs, he slowly begins to find out that he’s the son of a god when he finds a gift from Dawn given for him - a magic broom. Abaddon tells Scepter his Mother, Dawn, didn’t want him because he was powerless and that he always will be. After Abaddon remarries to Penelope, Scepter begins to actively rebel against his parents and biding his time until he could leave, learning magic along the way, proving to himself that his father is wrong. After leaving, he goes to a monastery to be trained in the ways of the monks, which is where he meets one of his lifetime mentors - Del. Del taught him to fight as well as the ways of balance and how to control his power with his mind and not his emotions. 
Personality: Calm, Wise, Smart. A clear leader of the group who always comes up with plans to outsmart the enemy. Values the pursuit of knowledge and will stop at nothing to get it, which is one of his only weaknesses. He’s very driven and will stop at nothing to complete his goal. Charismatic, Scepter almost always knows just what to say, and often uses words more than violence. Level-headed, he often has to keep the others in the party in check. 
Alignment: Lawful Good
Relationship(s): Dawn, Goddess of Light (Familial, Bad)  Abaddon / Penelope (Familial, Bad)   Del (Familial, Good)   Princess Lathia of Osishri (Romantic, Warm)   
Gem (as of now): Scepter is the holder of the Water Gem, found in the Kingdom of Osishri. The Gem Spirit inside is Dewdrop. 
Other special items: Magic Broom, Campaign Magic Map (Greg)
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Prince Drive of Keri (Paladin, Human, PC):
Family/Allies: King Aster (Adopted Father), Queen Lianna (Adopted Mother, deceased?), Princess Naris (Adopted sister), Captain Elrik (Mentor), Noid/Evelyn Dior (Mentor/Birth Mother), Kane Estin (Birth Father, deceased), King Ayren (Adopted Uncle)
Backstory: After being found on the side of the road - soaked, cold, and alone, a nearby King and Queen take pity on the child and raise as their own, having not been able to have a child by blood. From the note, the only words that could be made out of the note was the word ‘Drive’, so they named their new son Drive. Drive grew up with happy days filled with fun and surrounded by love as he grew to want to become a knight and be as powerful as his father, even owning a wooden play sword he used to practice dueling with before he was ready to train. When he was nine, he traveled with his parents as a tragedy struck the kingdom - the two King’s younger sister, a duchess and her family were rumored to have been charred to ash by a dragon. As they searched for any hope of survivors, they found a small baby, the Duchess’s daughter, Naris in a trunk someone had stashed her in for safekeeping. Thus, Drive had a new adopted sister, and the two grew to become very close as the years ticked by. One evening, while going on a trip to their uncle, King Ayren’s Kingdom of Westria, the royal family was attacked by a group of horned creatures. The creatures nearly killed Drive but Lianna sacrificed herself so that he and Naris could get away to safety. King Aster was driven to a deep, depressive, grief - he blamed himself so much that he was determined to fix it and bring her back from the dead, pushing his duties and family aside and throwing himself into his work. One night he spoke of a gem foretold by legend to grant a wish, and he set out into the great unknown to retrieve it and fix his mistake. Upon his return with the gem, he demeanor completely changed into one of rage, cruelty, and manipulation. Drive was constantly fighting his own mind and his own ideas for his father’s expectations, making him feel like he was never good enough for his own father. When his father finally decided to set him on training to become the next Guard Captain in Elrik’s place, he was so excited that over the years he became numb and oblivious to how his father and more importantly, his sister changed. 
Personality: Determined, extremely protective, compassionate, and caring. Drive feels like the protector of the party, always wanting to help everyone - his kingdom, his home, his friends, and his sister. Perhaps too Charismatic, he’s too attractive and forced to wear a helmet to somewhat stunt his looks enough he won’t be bothered by random people. He can be a bit awkward sometimes and not really know what to say, but whenever he does say something meaningful, you know it’s from the heart. He’s also somewhat the combat trainer in the group in teaching both Naris and Lathia combat moves to help them. If anyone tries to mess with or hurt his sister, he will do everything in his power to take them down and make sure they can never hurt Naris again. His protective anger over his sister is his greatest weakness.
Alignment: Lawful Good
Relationship(s): King Aster (Familial, Tense), Princess Naris (Familial, Protective), Captain Elrik (Mentor, Respected), King Ayren (Familial, Tense)
Gem (as of now): Drive is the holder of the Earth Gem, found in an ancient forest women tribe founded under a God’s worship and word. Gem Spirit inside is Fern.  
Other special items: Signature Helmet
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Jango (Barbarian, Dwarf, PC):
Family/Allies: Sarnora (Mother), Grimdrak (Father)
Backstory: Jango grew up as the son of Sarnora and Grimdrak up in the dwarf mountain village. His family had a business of brewing ale, they often traded with merchants or other suppliers, since many of the towns and cities did not have the room or the money to distill ale. Jango grew up with the nickname ‘Little lion’, being one of the smallest dwarves in the entire village, yet with the heart of a mountain lion. He pushed himself day in and day out to do his part to help, and eventually over time he got strong enough to help handle the mill by himself. Overtime, his father became a massive drunk and would often end up drinking half their supply - his parents would often argue and fight late into the night. Finally, his mother had enough and kicked him out permanently - Jango has not seen him since. One day, a giant beast, one of the pack leaders of the mountain lions the village had been fighting, killed a large portion of the village overnight. Saddened, Jango set out on his own to kill the beast and save his village once and for all. After coming home with one of the beast’s teeth, he was crowned hero of the village. Now, he still works for the family business and helps his Mom run it when he isn’t out making deliveries. 
Personality: Chaotic, Unpredictable, quick to anger. When he’s not drunk out of his mind, Jango usually is quick to solve problems by fighting and violence, especially if said person does anything to set him off. He’s used to being powerful and isn’t used to being the one getting beaten down. Often the others work to reign him in, mainly Scepter. Though his ways are a bit unconventional, his intentions are mainly pure and his loyalty is true. 
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Relationship(s): Sarnora (Familial, Good), Grimdrak (Familial, Bad)
Gem (as of now): Jango is the holder of the Fire Gem, found in the kingdom of Keri in King Aster’s possession, then with Naris’s dragon form, leading to Drive joining the party. The Gem Spirit inside is Ember. 
Other special items: Bucket O’Ale
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Peanut AKA Galleria (Assassin, Dragonborn, PC):
Family/Allies: General Holly (Lover, deceased), Sasha (Friend), Undertaker (Mentor), Boss (Mentor), One (Mentor)
Backstory: Galleria began and grew up within the walls of the Cloaked castle and under the care of many of the others captured, and one of the few Dragonborns amongst the recruits. She was taken when she was barely a year old, and her village was raided, burned, and attacked. Her caretaker and mother, Connie Wilde, protected her with her life, but was too weak for the army and they were sadly separated. Connie was taken into slavery, and Galleria was taken into their army for her breath attack and poison immunities. She got the nickname Peanut from the other kids, since she was the youngest recruit taken. When she was about 6, she was put to training within her group under many of the Generals, where she met her friends Sarah and Holly. They were strong each within their own right, but together they were unstoppable. They advanced through the ranks, eventually coming under the command of the right hand herself, the ruthless Undertaker - known for sniffing out all and any traitorous behavior, being ruthless with her punishments and training and pushing all her recruits to their absolute limits just to see them waver and suffer. Though the training is rigorous, Peanut and Holly do well and support each other throughout it all. Sarah crumbled and was sent to become one of the guards of the castle, and deemed too weak to become one of the Cloaked. Holly and Peanut grew closer and bonded over watches and scouting missions. They were the perfect team to get rid of targets, and were barely ever apart. They both truly cared and loved each other, they acted as if they were dating, but they never really got super intimate or ever really made it official. They were back from a mission one day, and were hanging out in the dorm alone chatting about the mission and where they could pass by next when Peanut hugged Holly and then gave her a quick kiss. They kissed each other before, but this was the first time they risked it inside the castle - they stilled when they heard a gasp and saw Naris enter the room with their dinner, and she dropped it to the floor in shock. It didn’t take long for her to spill what she saw and when she did it was all over. Holly was tortured and eventually beheaded for her ‘traitorous’ actions, and Peanut was stuck in the dungeon on the list for her own public execution. The Undertaker, angry and embarrassed that she let a traitor slip by her grasp, she threw Holly’s beheaded head inside with Peanut to shut up her resistance and complaints, and to make sure she was hurt. This broke down her spirit and nearly broke her mind. Then, just when things seemed hopeless, the party passed by her cell and the rest is history. 
Personality: Skilled, Sly, and Smart. She can easily make her way out of almost any situation, and is highly skilled in murder and taking out targets, getting information, and leaving paractically no trail behind. Though she wears a calm and content look on the outside, her heart is badly broken and her sadness and anger over Holly still stew beneath the surface - Cloaked are taught to hide and dispose of all emotions, since they are an ‘inconvience’ and get in the way of getting targets taken care of and cloud the judgement of Loyalty. Many of the others are getting used to her casual murder talk as a solution to almost anything, and are kind of intimidated by her skill. Her tough personality hides a gentle and kind center. 
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Relationship(s): Sarah (Friend, Tense)  One (Familal, Warm), Boss (Mentor, Cold), Undertaker (Mentor, Cold)
Gem (as of now): Peanut is the holder of the Wind Gem, found in the infected village of Sewinda, that was deep in the clutches of Corruption’s control. With teh Mayor’s help, they restored and saved the village in return for the Gem. 
Other special items: None of note. 
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Princess Lathia of Osishri (Fighter, Osishirian, NPC):
Family/Allies: Prince Kyro (Brother), Queen Navine (Mother), King Garris (Father)
Backstory: Youngest in the royal family, Lathia has known nothing but the small bubble under the ocean for her whole life. Due to a curse placed in the royal family by the Sorceress Vivica, all women of the royal family must become model wives and all men trained to fight and protect - if they do not embrace these rules, on their 20th birthday they will die. This would be fine if it weren’t for the extra abilities the Sorceress gave them in return for being stuck under the ocean - elemental bending, represented by certain dyed colors in the hair of those with the talent. Thus, Navine had always been hard on Lathia and often pushes and forces her to practice and become the wife the curse expects her to be for her own survival. When her brother, Kyro, brings home Outsiders from above, she sees her slim chance of figuring out what life is really like up above, and what she’s dreamed it would be like. She sneaks around her family to the PCs for answers, and even begins to fall for a few of them. Drive, at her request, begins to teach her to fight, which after that night she practices frequently.  When Kyro gets attacked by the Sorceress Vivica on his Coming of Age day, Lathia doesn’t hesitate to save him, even when her impulsiveness almost gets her killed. The PCs save her and her brother, and help her while she’s recovering and dealing with Kyro, who’s now in a coma. Lathia finally realizes her feelings for Scepter after their night in the library, where they read until Lathia falls asleep in Scepter’s shoulder, in which case Scepter slowly brings her to bed and leaves her with a forehead kiss - Lathia was not completely asleep at the time. Upon waking up and realizing that the PCs went after the Sorceress, she packs a bag and sneaks out to save them on her own. Luckily, with her knowledge, she saves Scepter and Drive from Vivica’s spells, and Drive frees Jango from the cage Vivica threw him in. Once finally cornered, Lathia makes the ultimate sacrifice and reveals herself to fight and have them escape, not realizing her birthday was drawing near, turning her whole body to stone under the light of the moon. Her spirit quickly became trapped in the spirit waters that ran through Vivica’s lair. Once she was defeated into a pile of ash, the PCs finally met the reinforcements headed by Fernando - Lathia’s betrothed. Fernando and Kyro, now awake from his coma, go with the PCs to find the gem, and end up having to face Vivica’s Spirit Form. When they are in deep trouble, this is enough to trigger her Coming of Age and earn her own two bending abilities - water and shadow. While Scepter retrieves the Water Gem, Lathia confronts Fernando and tells him off, saying that she will never marry him. Once everyone is free and safe and the water gem is retrieved, Lathia makes a speech to her people and says that they will rebuild and make a new and better kingdom, putting her brother Kyro in charge as both the King and Queen step down. Kyro asks her why she couldn’t take it, and she tells him that she’s leaving, that she wants to explore this world, find new discoveries for her people, and help make sure that the PCs don’t get into too much trouble. He lets her go, telling her to keep her necklace their mother had given all of the royals in case they were ever kidnapped or lost, as a memento of them, and to lead her home. 
Once joining the party, she helps take down some of the Cloaked by charming and pretending to love them, a skill she’s sadly learned well with her years being in a forced relationship with Fernando. With a little encouragement from Drive, Lathia confesses to Scepter that same night, and they share their first kiss. When Scepter’s Dad makes a deal for a date with Lathia in return to give them the means of finding Naris, Lathia quickly agrees and Scepter saves her from being trapped and mind controlled by his own father. That night, they promise each other to not be reckless, to be safe and to always be there for each other. Once retrieving Naris, she begins to look after the girl a lot when the others are out, and gets to know her and care for her like one of her own. She almost loses Scepter, Drive, and Peanut when Corruption nearly kills them while inside their gems, leaving Scepter hardened, traumatized, and nearly emotionless. She tries her best to be there for him and comfort him, giving him space and time to heal. Even though she doesn’t completely understand what he went through, that doesn’t change the way she feels and her love for him.     
Personality: Strong-willed, Optimistic, Loving. She’s almost like the embodiment of the ‘He’s a little confused, but he’s got the spirit’ meme. She’s learning how to use a sword and get a grip on her new powers, still, she’s a very strong fighter. She can be a bit awkward at times, especially with her first real relationship with Scepter, or when she panics in stressful situations. She’s thoughtful and rarely ever jumps in headfirst - only if others are in serious danger. Despite her rocky relationship with her family, she still loves them and her Kingdom with all her heart. 
Alignment: Lawful Good
Relationship(s): Prince Kyro (Familial, Good)  Queen Navine (Familial, Neutral)   King Garris (Familial, Neutral)  Scepter (Romantic, Warm)
Other special items: Explorer’s Journal, Golden Jewel Necklace
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Princess Naris of Keri (Fighter, Human, NPC):
Family/Allies: Prince Drive of Keri (Older Adopted Brother/Mentor), King Aster (Adopted Father), Queen Lianna (Adopted Mother, deceased?), King Ayren (Adopted Uncle), Duchess Diana of Saxon (Birth Mother), Duke Bryce of Saxon (Birth Father), Captain Elrik (Family Friend)
Backstory: Naris was born the daughter of the Duke and Duchess of Saxon, one of the few shared branches between Keri and Westra, and a peaceful region near the mountains. Sadly, tragedy struck all too quickly during a dragon attack, leaving the Duke and Duchess’s year old daughter as the sole survivor, locked in a chest and saved from the burning flames. Around a few months later King Aster and his adopted son Drive are sent to look for survivors once they hear the news of the attack, and find the child, taking her under their care and adopting her as their own. Sadly, tragedy struck only two years later with the death of Queen Lianna. The Queen’s death threw King Aster into a deep depression from grief and self-blame for her death, making the two sibilings closer and closer over the years as they help to support each other, especially after their father left to find one of the fated magical gems of legend and bring their Mom back to life. Upon his return, it didn’t take long for him to change into something more darker, putting pressure on, manipulating, and abusing his seven year old daughter. He swore her to secrecy and made her so scared of saying a word by promising if she did, Drive would be next. While Drive grew older, trained with Elrik and got better at fighting and becoming a better leader for his people, Naris’s spirit broke day by day as she tried her best to squeeze into her father’s mold for her, getting punished for even the smallest mistakes. Eventually, she fought back and grabbed her father’s sacred treasure - the glowing gem he’d returned with so long ago - and tried to break it and have it release its hold on her father somehow. Her father, angry, stabbed her on the side as she leaped through the window and made it into the woods. There, the gem began to speak with her, asking her what she wanted and promising her every wish and desire. Determined to finish the fight against her father and end his torture and hold on her once and for all, she wished to strike fear into her father’s heart, and turned into a fire-breathing dragon. She stormed the palace and tore it to bits, searching for her father to teach him a lesson, but eventually was stopped when the party pulled the gem away from her with the help of her brother, Drive. After some celebration, she convinces Drive to join the party.
She gets in over her head when she tries to prove she can make it on her own after some of the party call her ‘useless’, which ends up getting her into trouble with the forest tribe. After primsing she’d be more safe, the party gets kidnapped by the Undertaker that night and the truth of their father’s abuse is finally out in the air thanks to her. When the Undertaker realizes they’re kinda strong, she takes Naris and runs off, kidnapping her. She takes her to the Cloaked Castle to become her obedient servant, slave, and pet - torture increases for every act of rebellion, every mistake. Eventually they wear down her spirit and mind enough to somewhat brainwash her into forgetting Drive and her family entirely, believing that she’s the Undertaker’s daughter and calling her ‘Mother’. Once saved, things between her and Drive are tense to say the least, but slowly are making their way to somewhat normal and are trying their best to openly talk about what happened with their father instead of just trying to forget it. 
Personality: Strong-willed, confident, pure of heart, but sometimes a bit reckless. Still learning to fight from her brother and now Peanut, she’s determined to succeed and set things right for herself and make sure she’s never as weak or vulnerable as she was with her father, she promised herself that she won’t stop fighting, that she’d never give up fighting against people like her father. She has doubts about herself and her abilities due to her abusive past, and she struggles talking about it with her brother, who blames himself often for the abuse. Though she’s grown up very fast mentally, there’s still a bit of childlike curiosity and wonder to her about the world around her, and just topics she never got around to learning about on her own. She gets nightmares a lot and can be a bit averse to any physical contact at times due to her trauma. All in all, she still tries to see the best in people, and uses her adapted survival skills and tactics built up from her past to help get out of jams. 
Like her brother, she’s also very protective of those she loves and would do anything for them, and she cares about them deeply, often being the ones to heal them with her own healer’s kit after taught fights or battles. 
Alignment: Neutral Good
Relationship(s): Prince Drive of Keri (Familial, Close), King Aster (Familial, Cold), Peanut (Mentor, Respected), King Ayren (Familial, Tense)
Other special items: Pink Ribbon, Old Photo, Wooden Play Sword, Healer’s Kit
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Noid AKA Evelyn Dior (No Determined Class, Human, NPC)
Family/Allies: Kane Estin (Husband, Deceased), Jane Dior (Mother), George Dior (Father), Rose (Close Friend), Ketin Estin (Son, Deceased?)
Backstory: Evelyn Dior was born into the rich family of the Diors, famous jewelry makers. Her home life was extremely strict as she was taught what to do or say, and was quickly groomed into a ‘well-mannered’ lady in rich society. Though, she was not happy with the lessons or the awkward dinners between her and her betrothed, who was nine years older than her. One day, when learning about the business from her father, she met Kane - one of the miners who worked in getting the metal they needed to craft with - and they became good friends, then best friends, then romantic feelings began to bloom on her 18th birthday. When she finally confessed her feelings and was about to kiss him, her father broke it up and fired Kane, saying that he’ll make sure that he would never see his ‘little angel’ ever again, not if he could help it. He beat up Kane and quickly left. That argument sparked the final match to get Evelyn to leave her family for good and start a new life with Kane. With the help of her servant as well as best friend Rose, they snuck out before sunrise, leaving practically nothing behind.
The two quickly got married and Evelyn changed her last name from Dior to Estin, to officially leav her old life behind. Life was good and eventually they started a family together, Evie pregnant with their first child. Unfortunately, the child was not strong enough to make it and began to slowly die as Evie just lies in bed, writhing in agony as the couple just cries and mourns their dying baby. Desprate, Evie summons a demon named Hragroth and they make a deal - the demon gives her a black stone to help save her child in exchange for the sacrifce of her eye. She agrees, and her child is saved. Kane finds out she did something and confronts her, leading to a bit of an argument between the two, and eventually Kane says that if she really had no other choice, he’ll stand by her. Their son is eventually born a few months later and is named Ketin, after his father. 
While Kane is at work, Evelyn begins to have odd moments with the baby in her arms or playing in his crib - she’ll just try to grab him or snatch something off him, something she couldn’t quite describe, or sometimes even hiss and growl at him, making him cry and snapping her out of it. Other times, she’ll act a bit off around Kane, and once he caught her sleepwalking and trying to throw their child into the burning coals of the fire. She goes to get rid of the stone but when her child is snatched from her arms and taken, she uses it without hesitation and straight up murders the baby-snatcher in cold blood with these dark tenticles coming up from the ground. She saves Ketin, but the townspeople see the whole thing. They accuse her of witchcraft and conspiring against the town, and despite Kane’s protests that it isn’t true, even he’ll admit he’s starting to become scared of his wife. 
One night, the town organizes a riot and begins to burn down Evelyn and Kane’s house, both still inside. Luckily Kane smells the smoke and gets them to safety, not before proclaiming that she needs to let them burn her at the stake and get rid of the demon inside of her, saying that it will be better for Ketin’s safety and the safety of the town, and he even calls out to them as they begin to march toward the two with torches and pitchforks. Evelyn finally goes completely berserk and murders nearly the entire town trying to escape with Ketin, a letter attached that she scribbled ‘Drive and take to the Diors’. She rushed through the rain and lightning as they chased her up a cliff, clutching her child close. She falls off the cliff, the black stone shattering into four pieces to become a part of the four phrophecy stones. The basket holding Ketin flies through the air and eventually lands toward the road, to be picked up by King Aster and Queen Lianna who couldn’t have a child of their own - calling the child ‘Drive’ since that was the only part of the note they could make out in the smeared and wet ink stained paper. 
As for Evelyn, she hears her husband cry out “NOOOO” as she falls, hitting her forehead against a rock and leaving her memories fuzzy. The ‘no’ turns into Noid, which she assumes her name is when she wakes up in a ravine, hurt and bleeding. 
Found by Scepter, who became her first friend and confidant, who asks about her past and makes her get kind of really upset, though he eventually forgives him. Recently, she’s realized she lost her baby and wants to find it because she misses it and doesn’t know what happened to her baby.  
Personality: Defensive, erratic, has good inetions and a good heart. Speaks in third person. Craves friendship and companionship. Hates talking about the past because ‘the bad memories hurt’. Hates all the Cloaked, thinks their parctices are wrong and wants to get rid of them all and stop their reign of terror. Is not much of a fighter, but will fight if she needs to, is more on the fighting tactic side of fighting. Being sheltered in a cave for years, she loves to learn what’s changed in the time she’s been gone. Always a bit of a wild card, Noid just wants to make friends and kick butt. Fun fact - she’s eaten a mostly vegetarian diet while living in the cave, but just discovered meat and loves it. 
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Relationship(s): Kane Estin (Romantic, Close), Jane Dior (Familial, Cold), George Dior (Familial, Cold), Ketin Estin (Familial, Loving Protector)
Other special items: Locket
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kartiavelino · 5 years
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A Look Again at Every little thing Beyoncé Achieved This 12 months
by Billy Nilles | Wed., Sep. 4, 2019 9:00 AM Share Tweet E-mail transfer shut Now Enjoying Up Subsequent Beyonce Reveals Main Leg Throughout Attractive Night time Out With Jay-Z 9. 4. Eight. One. As followers of Beyoncé know, as we speak marks an enormous day for the famous person, as she celebrates her 38th birthday on Wednesday, Sept. 4. (And in the event you do not have the spoken intro to “Get Me Bodied” off her second studio album, the appropriately-entitled B’Day, working by your head proper now, can you actually even name your self a fan?) Although she kicked off the festivities a little bit early this yr, celebrating backstage with hubby Jay-Z and different shut associates on the Made in America Competition after standing in awe of Lizzo‘s set, it is time to do issues proper and pay correct tribute to our one true Queen. Bey’s mother Tina Knowles—aka the lady now we have to thank for bringing the otherworldly icon all the way down to Earth on this very day 38 years in the past—already bought issues going for us, sharing a special message for her daughter on Instagram. “38 years in the past as we speak you got here into my life and I do know and not using a shred of doubt that God despatched you!!!” she captioned a candy snapshot of the mother-daughter duo. “I had lately misplaced my mother and by no means thought that I may really feel that specific sort of love once more however 7 months later I used to be pregnant with you (39 years in the past folks). The second I noticed you I knew that that was IT !!!! We have been the most effective of associates since then. You could have introduced me such Pleasure and delight and love and friendship!!! Your coronary heart is as huge as Texas!! You might be probably the greatest mothers ever! And I like you soo a lot. Have the most effective birthday EVER!!!! Mother.” Images Beyoncé’s Most Memorable Performances However now it is our flip.  2019 has been a large yr for Queen Bey with the icon securing the No. 2 spot on Forbes‘ list of the top 10 highest-paid women in music, and if you check out all she’s achieved since turning 37 a yr in the past, it is not exhausting to see why. Be part of us as we blast our Better of Bey playlist and do that day proper! YouTube Full Possession Not solely did Beyoncé purchase out Topshop proprietor Philip Inexperienced from his 50 % share in activewear line Ivy Park in December after allegations of sexual misconduct, bullying and racial harassment arose towards the him (allegations he has denied), making her the primary black lady to to be the only proprietor of an athleisure model, however, in April, she and Adidas introduced a brand new partnership that may see Ivy Park additional developed whereas she developed new garments and footwear for the enduring firm. As Adidas’ press launch assured, Queen Bey would retain sole possession of her firm below the phrases of their partnership. Shares for the corporate rose 1.three % upon the announcement.  YouTube The GLAAD Award In March, Bey and hubby Jay-Z acquired the prestigious Vanguard Award, introduced yearly to a member of the leisure group who doesn’t determine as LGBT however who has made a major completely different in selling equal rights for the LGBT group, at the 2019 GLAAD Media Awards. Whereas accepting the award, the devoted the honour to her late Uncle Johnny, “probably the most fabulous homosexual man that I’ve ever recognized,” who had handed away from HIV. “He lived his fact. He was courageous and unapologetic throughout a time when this nation wasn’t as accepting, and witnessing his battle with HIV was probably the most painful experiences I’ve ever lived,” she told the crowd, combating again tears. “‪I’m hopeful that his wrestle served to open pathways for different younger folks to stay extra freely. LGBTQI rights are human rights. To decide on who you’re keen on is your human proper. The way you determine and see your self is your human proper. Who you make like to and take that ass to Purple Lobster is your human proper.” Courtesy of Parkwood Leisure The Homecoming Drop A yr after wowing the gang at Coachella along with her beautiful and historical past headlining performances, making her the primary African-American lady to headline the pageant, she and Netflix teamed to launch Homecoming, a documentary and live performance movie that she govt produced, wrote and directed, chronicling the creation of the awe-inspiring present whereas exhibiting it in its entirety for anybody who wished to relive its glory. Days later, it was reported that the movie was a part of a three-project deal Bey had signed with the streaming large value an astounding $60 million. Article continues beneath Chelsea Lauren/Shutterstock The Field Workplace Smash For her first movie in six years, Bey went huge, lending her voice to Disney’s big-budget photorealistic computer-animated remake of The Lion King. Launched on July 19, the movie went on to gross $1.5 billion worldwide, surpassing Frozen because the highest-grossing animated movie ever, whereas additionally changing into the second highest-grossing movie of the yr and the seventh-highest of all-time. Not too shabby. Niklas Halle’n/PA Wire Assembly Her Princess Whereas at The Lion King‘s U.Okay. premiere in July, Bey and Jay-Z finally met Prince Harry and Meghan Markle when the Duchess of Sussex made her first look at a significant movie star occasion since giving start to Archie Harrison in early Could. In line with lip-readers, Queen Bey known as Meghan “my princess” as she greeted her with a hug, congratulating her on the start of her first youngster. “It is early days in that relationship!” a supply informed E! Information. “However I feel protected to say that they positively struck up an on the spot clear rapport, bonding over their youngsters.” The large second got here months after Bey posted a photograph of her and her husband standing in entrance of a duplicate of the Mona Lisa portray that had been changed with a tiara-wearing Meghan as she accepted her BRIT Award for Finest Worldwide Group in February. Netflix The Emmy Nominations Days earlier than The Lion King hit theaters, Bey earned a few invitations to this yr’s Primetime Emmy Awards when Homecoming netted her Four nominations complete, probably the most she’s ever acquired for anyone venture, for Excellent Selection Particular (Pre-Recorded), Excellent Directing and Excellent Writing for a Selection Particular, and Excellent Music Route. In truth, with these 4, she doubles her profession tally of Emmy nominations. Article continues beneath The New Album Bey’s work on The Lion King wasn’t restricted to easily offering the voice of lioness Nala. By no means one to relaxation on her laurels, she additionally produced and curated a companion album for the movie known as The Lion King: The Reward. “That is sonic cinema,” she stated in an announcement. “It is a new expertise of storytelling. I wished to do greater than discover a assortment of songs that have been impressed by the movie. It’s a combination of genres and collaboration that is not one sound. It’s influenced by all the pieces from R&B, pop, hip hop and Afro Beat. I wished to place everybody on their very own journey to hyperlink the storyline. Every music was written to mirror the movie’s storytelling that provides the listener an opportunity to think about their very own imagery, whereas listening to a brand new up to date interpretation. It was essential that the music was not solely carried out by probably the most attention-grabbing and gifted artists but in addition produced by the most effective African producers. Authenticity and coronary heart have been essential to me.” The monitor record included 10 appearances from Bey herself, whereas additionally that includes Jay-Z, Infantile Gambino, Kendrick Lamar, Pharrell Williams, and her daughter, Blue Ivy. YouTube The Smithsonian Name A yr after her history-making Vogue cover was revealed, ArtNews reported in August that The Smithsonian Nationwide Portrait Gallery had acquired one of many pictures achieved by photographer Tyler Mitchell, who grew to become the primary black photographer to shoot the honored publication’s cowl unfold in its 126 yr historical past. “This explicit work introduced us nearer to Beyoncé’s phrases, showing throughout the journal’s pages,” the museum’s curator of images Leslie Ureña stated in an announcement. “And exhibiting us extra of the historic shoot.” The {photograph}, which options Queen Bey rocking a Valentino gown and the ornate headdress you see right here as she leans her elbows on a flower-adorned Greek column, is the second of the singer to be acquired by the museum. The primary, which isn’t presently on show, is a poster from her debut solo album, Dangerously in Love. Joyful birthday, Bey! Share Tweet E-mail https://www.eonline.com/information/1070269/a-look-back-at-everything-beyonce-accomplished-this-year?cmpid=rss-000000-rssfeed-365-topstories&utm_source=eonline&utm_medium=rssfeeds&utm_campaign=rss_topstories The post A Look Again at Every little thing Beyoncé Achieved This 12 months appeared first on Kartia Velino. https://kartiavelino.com/a-look-back-at-everything-beyonce-accomplished-this-year/
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hommebizarre · 6 years
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The Beginning: Part 2
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This is the second entry to a six part series. Please read the first entry if you haven’t already, it was posted October 1st. Happy scrolling!
“Translation” of the entry pictured above:
“Hanna 9-25-?
Once upon a time there was a unicorn. That unicorn was so bored, so it went to Bunny’s house. Bunny had a sign on the door. It said, ‘Dear friends, I can’t play today. My mom took me to the dentist to get three teeth pulled out. -From Bunny’ Then he went to turtles house. His mom opened the door [and] Unicorn said, “Is Turtle there?” [She responded,] ‘He’s at soccer practice.’ So he went to Elephant’s house [and] he went to Lizard’s house to do homework together. So Unicorn went to Dolphin’s house, he had to go to her brother’s football game, so [Unicorn] went home.
[Unicorn] opened the door, he started to cry. His mother said, ‘What’s the matter?’ [He responded,] “I don’t know who to play with. I went to Bunny’s house [and] she had to get three teeth pulled out. Then, I went to turtles house [and] Turtle had to go to soccer practice. Dolphin had to go to her brother’s football game, and then I went to Elephants house. Elephant went to Lizard’s house to do homework together, so who am I gonna–’ ‘Me!’, said his mother. And they played lots of fun crafts and games.
The end.”
As I stated in part one, these journal entries say a lot and it is clear that something was wrong. Why is a seven year old child feeling the need to express such sadness through handwriting? I read all of the entries to a friend of mine and he was literally astounded. It didn’t occur to me how unnatural it was, but after the look on my friends face, I could tell these entries were powerful. Unnatural is the wrong adjective, powerful is more fitting.
Anyway, this entry isn’t about my exciting trip to the fair (once again, refer to part 1). Instead it’s a fictional story about a unicorn who reached out to several friends wanting to play, but alas, the unicorn ended up alone. There are many aspects of this entry that make it interesting to reflect on as an adult. I’m gonna try and make a list of these things, bare with me.
1) I’ve always been an animal lover, and all of the characters in the story are animals. I love animals, but especially sea animals and reptiles/amphibians, so the turtle, lizard, and dolphin characters make sense. Sounds endearing until you realize how fucking sad the story is. I wish I could give seven year old Hanna a hug.
2) Many characteristics show that this fictional tale is a thinly veiled autobiographical story. Around this age, I went to the dentist and got some of my teeth pulled, which was a fairly traumatic experience that I remember quite vividly. I cannot confirm whether it was three teeth or if it was in 2003 (I called my mom and asked), but I wouldn’t doubt it. It’s just a weirdly specific detail. Another reason I can tell I am actually writing about my life is that I played soccer at this age, hence the part where I mention soccer practice.
3) I am obviously writing as if I am the unicorn, but the unicorn is a guy. I probably shouldn’t read into it too hard because I was trying to write as a seven year old, but I found it to be interesting. I knew I was a girl at that point obviously, so why not the unicorn be a girl? Was I trying to hide the fact that I was actually the unicorn? I have no idea. But, to this day, any inanimate object or living animal I always call a “he.” I don’t know why, but when I look at something my brain automatically personifies it as a guy. It doesn’t happen 100% of the time, but I would say a good 85% of the time.
4) As a child I cried. A lot. So much so that my mother would reward me by marking the days on the calendar when I didn’t cry. I cried every day of my life for the first decade. My poor mother. My reaction to not finding anybody to play with are immediately tears. I didn’t say that I was sad or angry, I said that the unicorn went home, opened the door, and started to cry. Sounds like Hanna. *P.S. I still cry at least once a week. Sometimes more.*
5) The storyline itself reflects my lack of friends while growing up. I have always been an outlier that struggled to fit in. I was running around the mountains and collecting rocks as a kid while being alone, I don’t remember there being a friend with me often. This used to be a lot more difficult for me to deal with than it is now. Don’t get me wrong, even today there are times where it isn’t easy being the weird one, but I can appreciate it more than I once did.
6) And last but not least, my mom has always been a source of security for me. Solace was found by the unicorn when he came home and “played lots of fun crafts and games” with his mother. Up until I was about 18 years old I was dead set on the idea that my mother was some sort of godly figure that made no mistakes. Obviously she is human and has made her fair share of mistakes, but learning that as an adult threw me on my ass. She was the only person I had amidst all of the chaos in the household caused by my father. Now I am 22 and I have recently been processing my relationship with my mother in a way I never have before, similarly to when I was 18, but it’s also completely different. This is actually hard for me to even write about because I am still trying to figure out what the fuck I am thinking. Tangent in 5...4….3...2...1.
So, let’s just get a few things out of the way. I know my mom loves me and I have never questioned that in my life. Ever. She supports me in my decisions through my academic career, my career career, my artistic abilities, sometimes even financially when I am struggling to make ends meet (shout out to being a student and a teacher aka I am broke). If I am sad, my mom will always listen to what I have to say and hug me and tell me it’s going to be alright. Awesome, right? I am not questioning her ability to love me, I know she loves me, but recently I have been feeling like there’s always been something lacking in our relationship.
Emotional intelligence is what is lacking. I cannot reprimand her for this, because her awareness is just part of who she is. Certain things that she does/has done indeed hurts me, although she is completely unaware why or how she’s hurting me. Let me list a couple of things that evidence her lack of emotional intelligence: a) the obvious one is carrying my father on her back for the majority of my life. That relationship was toxic and clearly traumatic for me, but my mother stayed in hopes of keeping her family together and to get some money from her mother in law. b) her unconditional love is sometimes too unconditional…? As in, sometimes the best decision to make is to not help somebody, like if helping them is just enabling them. This applies to my dad and also my sister. My mom recently got ordained so she could marry my sister to her second husband on October 20th, 2018. I didn’t go to the wedding, I went skydiving in Vegas instead. Nothing says til’ death do us part like jumping out of an airplane. My sister split from her first husband about a year ago and she is already onto her second marriage. Everything about the story is fishy to me and anybody else I have shared it with, but mama bear supports her babies through it all, even if it’s not the greatest decision on the baby’s part. They also got married in a location that my family and I have been going to since I was an infant. It’s a place that I hold dearly to my heart because it reminds me of family, something that I don’t have much of. So of course my sister marrying her second husband under unclear circumstances in a location I deem as a temple is going to hurt my fucking feelings. I’m scared for my sister because she is clearly not processing things and is suppressing soooooo hard. But, again, mama bear supports her babies through it all. Lack of emotional intelligence. Catchin’ my drift? c) I don’t even have a c), but I don’t think I need one.
Let me try to swing this back around to my original point. My mother has always been a pillar of comfort in my life, as portrayed in the conclusion of my fictional story, but as I grow older I reflect on our relationship and feel a lack of fulfillment somewhere. It’s hard for me to explain exactly what that is because I am currently trying to figure it out, but as I said, her lack of emotional awareness hurts me. I don’t want it to hurt me because I know that it is something fairly out of her control (or is it not?). Ugh, ambivalence. It’s just hard to know that the one consistent human in your entire life is not on the same page as you. Regardless of how many hugs, kisses, gifts, or words of affirmation are given, if your emotional comfort is not on the same page as you then it will result in a feeling of some really confusing unfulfillment.
So yeah. That took a really fucking weird unexpected turn. Sorry if you’re confused. Actually, not sorry if you’re confused, because I am clearly confused so it would only make sense that you also may be confused. And that’s all folks. Thanks for reading. 
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