#aka the Trauma of Unwilling Publicization

[d0gtoothjones]

Family Portrait, Overexposed [x]

[spidney]

If I see one more person saying Sebastian's acting in episode 3 was bad I'm gonna lose my entire shit bc how hypocritical of you to praise his acting in CATWS then say it deteriorated when he did the same amazing work in both projects?!?

May I remind you that in episode 3 Bucky had to come not only face to face with a person that used him but also having to work with him without having a choice because he was desperate to do the right thing?

May I remind you that Bucky had to act like the Winter Soldier aka somebody he tries to get rid of since multiple movies and very clearly shown since the beginning of the series? That all his work to make amends and telling everybody (including himself) that he isn't that person anymore basically was a step back for him the moment he had to act like his old self again? Having to dive into the mindset of his most personal traumas he's still coping with so OF COURSE it means minimalist expressions and having to muster the coldest and lifeless eyes ever known to mankind because he was supposed to be controled and brainwashed? And later having to deal with it and the strength it takes to rebuild a healthy state of mind after throwing away all the good work he did on himself?

Something doesn't add up here, I'll take no criticisms for the job Sebastian is doing for nuancing Bucky's telltale emotions, he isn't gonna serve them on silver platter for you. Bucky isn't going to be overly happy about something he has to do against his will. Can you imagine how traumatic it must be for him to do something he's unwilling to do, unwilling to *be* again?

Have you ever tried not to break down in public? Bucky has been close to tears at least twice in that episode and you're telling me it was bad acting? Just say you don't know the character and go, there's more subtlety than meets the eye and sometimes you gotta look for it.

[365days365movies]

January 4, 2021: First Blood (1982) (Part II)

Quick Recap before we go on. Oh, and SPOILERS right up top!

John Rambo (Sylvester Stallone) is a Vietnam vet wandering through Washington State, until coming upon the town of Hope, run by the Sheriff Will Teasle (Brian Dennehy).

Sheriff Will Teasle is an absolute dick who arrests Rambo for no real reason; just for being a “drifter.” His police force, which includes the sadistic Galt (Jack Starrett) and sympathetic Mitch (David Caruso, AKA Horatio Caine from CSI: Miami), beats John Rambo, and post-2020 me is UNCOMFORTABLE!!!!!!!

Rambo has Vietnam flashbacks (like you do) and escapes the prison, pursued by the obsessive and dickish Sheriff and his equally dickish men (except for Horatio, maybe).

Galt tries to shoot Rambo, and karma bitch-slaps him RIGHT in the face, holy shit. He dies, and Rambo is blamed and shot at, escaping into the forest.

OK?

OK. On with the recap!

At this point, all of Rambo’s actions are in self-defense. In truth, it’s been self-defense since the beginning. However, he does kill two dogs, so...yeah, can’t really justify that. That sucks. The dog’s handler gets shot by Rambo, who now has a gun, and we also see that Galt’s certified sociopathy has leaked into everybody else but Horatio upon his death, including the dog guy, who tells his dogs to straight up kill Rambo. But, as previously stated...that’s not what happens.

At this point, I should introduce the amemedala.

The amemedala is a portion of the mesencephalon (or midbrain) discovered in the brains of millennials and younger individuals, recently discovered, named, and made up by yours truly. This area, attached to the thalamus, acts as a relay center between the cerebrum and the various sensory receptors of the body, similar to the function of the thalamus. However, while the thalamus governs the broad relay of senses to the appropriate areas of the brain for analysis, the amemedala relays appropriate sensory signals to the frontal lobes, where catalogs of shared sociological trends, or memes, are housed. This relay and association generates connections between extrenal stimuli, and entries in the meme catalog of the frontal lobes. While this is technically an autonomic process, it can be suppressed with enough willpower.

Why am I ringing this up in the middle of First Blood? Because EVERY. SINGLE. CELL of my brain is working to suppress the amemedala right now. Why? BECAUSE OF THE LORAX, AND FOR WHOM HE SPEAKS.

Is it an outdated meme? Very much so. BUT I CANNOT GET IT OUT OF MY GODDAMN HEAD AS I WATCH THIS MOVIE.

OK. That is now out of my system. Anyway, Rambo continues to speak for the trees, which is understandably starting to spook the smalltown cops. This leads to the VERY surprising moment where a camouflaged Rambo appears OUT OF NOWHERE and stabs Horatio in the goddamn leg! Like, wow, he was invisible! I had to rewind the film to see where he was. This is tense...and awesome, not gonna lie. This is awesome.

And then, he gets another cop by JUMPING FROM A TREE. Well, a tree stump, BUT STILL. After he takes him out, he stands in plain sight in front of an approaching cop. That cop, subscribing once again to the shoot-first-ask-questions-later policy, fires. And I SWEAR, Rambo is FASTER THAN THOSE SPEEDING BULLETS, as he dodges out of the way, and the bullets HIT THE COP HE JUST TOOK OUT!

And then, when I didn’t think this could get any more intense, that cop triggers a booby trap, and A STICK WITH WOODEN SPIKES GOES THROUGH THIS MAN’S LEGS, AND HE’S SPEARED LIKE A KEBAB OH MY GOD

The asshole sheriff runs to the NEW set of panicked screams, and his compatriot is just Batman-ed away by Rambo. It’s just the sheriff, now. The storm is building, and the forest is getting darker. The sheriff frees leg-spike cop, and goes to find the other cop, who’s been PINNED TO A TREE LIKE A BUTTERFLY IN A DISPLAY CASE. See, look!

HOLY SHIT IT’S RAMBO WITH A KNIFE IN THE FOREST. He pins the sheriff up to a tree, then with some legitimately badass lines, threatens with the sheriff with “a war [he] wouldn’t believe,” and telling him to make like Elsa and…

I love this sequence. It is the most intense, crazy, holy shit sequence I’ve seen so far this month. Wow. I understand why people talk about this movie. Man, that was a hell of a ride! Good movie, though. All right, so, time for the final sco-

Oh. Oh, my God. I’m only HALFWAY INTO THE MOVIE?

...Wow. OK, then.

We now meet Colonel Sam Trautman, Rambo’s commander in the Green Berets. He’s come to “get his boy.” He says that he came to rescue the Sheriff’s dumb ass from Rambo, rather than the other way around. And the Sheriff is...an idiot. He’s an ass, he’s a maniac, and he’s a stubborn idiot. Even after learning that Rambo is the best, he’s unwilling to back down, the dummkopf.

Rambo kills a wild boar in the woods, which makes no sense for Washington State, but whatever, sure. Anyway, they try to get the colonel to lure Rambo out, even though that’s obviously gonna make his PTSD, just...SO much worse. Especially as he starts using Vietnam parlance in contacting him. Not gonna end well, guys. But it’s then that we learn that Rambo is now the last surviving member of his unit, contributing to his trauma. Rambo’s also been trying to get in contact with the Colonel, winding up here because he has no place to go. He says that there are no friendly civilians, and the trouble’s been caused by that “king-shit” cop. I will be using this term from now on.

Wow. Damn. Hell of a reason for that title. And I think I love this movie. Seriously, I’m having a good time.

King-Shit Cop keeps going ahead with his absolute idiocy, despite all warnings to the contrary. So, a bunch of troops now converge upon Rambo’s place, but he naturally opens fire on them, without killing a single person. In fact, he hasn’t killed anyone this whole movie, and they make a point of saying that he’s been holding back the whole time. So, they decide to use the next, most logical course of action. They FIRE A ROCKET AT HIM.

Afterwards, the Colonel and King Shit Cop catch up at a bar, where the latter exposes his full sociopathy, commenting that he just wanted to kill Rambo. This is opposed to the Colonel, who doesn’t really know what he’d do if Rambo survived.

Which, of course, he did. C’mon, you think a little military-grade propelled explosive is gonna kill John Rambo? Nah. He’s the best there ever was, and he’s gonna prove it now. He jumps into a military vehicle holding an M-60, and hijacks it. Doesn’t take long for the news to break that Rambo’s still kicking, and he’s quickly intercepted by King Shit Cop, who JUST. DOESN’T. KNOW. WHEN. TO QUIT. And I’d admire his tenacity if he wasn’t SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

The cops try to run Rambo and the truck of the road, and he plays the UNO Reverse Card on them instead. And I’m pretty sure at this point…

...that old Johnny boy’s just killed some cops. So, yeah, now there’s a bigger problem. He powers through the State Police blockade like it was a banner blocking a football team, stops at a gas station, grabs the gun from the car, and LIGHTS ALL OF THAT SHIT ON FIRE! Destroying the livelihood of an individual who had nothing to do with this.

Yeah, Rambo’s starting to turn from innocent acting in self-defense to public menace REAL quick. And yeah, it’s King Shit Cop’s fault entirely...but, yeah, Johnny needs some help, because he’s losing the train at this point. But, not to be outdone, King Shit Cop is also beginning to lose it, and it’s definitely beginning to seem like only one of them is going to come out of this alive. And the Colonel tries to give him an out, but King Shit Cop’s prepared to go down with the ship that he blew a hole in in the first place. Like an asshole.

But here we go, the finale. John Rambo vs. King Shit Cop (whose name, by the way, is Will Teasle. I just like Rambo’s name for him better). KSC’s on the roof, Rambo’s on the street. Rambo causes more property damage, possibly because banks also give him PTSD (I joke, but PTSD is no laughing matter, John clearly needs help), and then finds his way to a store that has just all of the ammo a psychologically-damaged Vietnam War veteran on a revenge quest could ever need.

And then he BLOWS. THAT. SHIT. UP.

And he does this...ALL of this...just to lure KSC out of hiding. This man DESTROYS A TOWN because this idiot, sociopathic, unhinged, King Shit Cop, won’t just STAND. THE FUCK. DOWN ALREADY.

Rambo enters the police station, where KSC is on the roof. And, like the Colonel and the rest of us guessed, KSC gets shot in the process. And as Rambo stands over KSC, the Colonel finally shows up and does what literally everybody else should have done.

Talk. He just...talks to Rambo. He talks to this mentally ill man, and that mentally ill man responds, espousing his pure anger at the war, the public, protesters, work, the country, the town, himself...everyone. And goddamn, is that shit palpable.

This man can no longer fit in the world that he was forced to leave, and forced to return to. This poor, poor, poor man. It hurts. And it sucks. And he pours his heart out to the Colonel, and to us, and...you feel it. You feel his trauma, you feel his pain. You feel the aftermath of war. And it’s been seven years at this point for the Colonel, but no time for John. Not Rambo. John. And it’s just...never over.

Damn. Goddamn.

This...this is one hell of a good movie. And not just a good action movie, either. A damn good movie.

And that’s it. That’s First Blood.

[vee-angel]

Upcoming Story Introductions

I just wanted to write a brief introduction to give a quick look at some of up-and-coming stories and story series I have in the works.

--The Pervert Pentet--

This is going to be a series of stories exploring the lives of five women who each embrace and exemplify a certain extreme fetish lifestyle. There is:

Potty-Mouth Piper- Skinny girl with Swedish ancestry and a punk-rock aesthetic. Piper is the epitome of a filth-fetishist. On top of living up to her name in the sense that she often insists that her mouth be used as a toilet, she speaks and acts in the most obscene ways possible. As an example, she has a tattoo on the side of her head (which is shaved into a green mohawk) which reads “Ass to Mouth 4Ever.” However, rather than the normal interpretation that anything that’s been up her ass must immediately go into her mouth, she insists that anything that goes into her mouth must have first been up her (or someone else’s) ass. Piper identifies as a lesbian, but is more-or-less free-use for any gender, due to her love of obscenity and bodily fluids. The early part of her story takes place in high school where she meets the love of her life; a timid filth-fetishist names Mackenzie; she becomes obsessed with Piper, who slowly helps Mackenzie open up to her fantasies. Mackenzie helps Piper feel as though she has someone who actually accepts her.

Sharking Sherry- Soft, feminine body with very pretty breasts, slightly large for her frame. Half-Japanese/Half Caucasian. Exposure/exhibitionism fetishist. Sherry grew up in a very Americanized family, but from a young age, she felt drawn to her Japanese ancestry. Her parents had no objections to her engaging in her Japanese culture (after all, things like Pokemon and anime were becoming increasingly commonplace). Due to their ignorance regarding how “adult” anime and manga could be, Sherry was exposed to themes of female humiliation/embarrassment as a form of comic relief at a young age and eventually started watching hentai in her early teens. As she became more adult, she became interested in a Japanese activity called sharking; the trend and fetish of exposing a woman in public against her will where it would be filmed and posted online. After high-school, she takes a year off to visit Japan where, much to her delight, she becomes the victim of a sharking video, but to her disappointment, only her panties are exposed. The experience re-ignites her interest and she later tries to make arrangements with someone online to participate in another sharking video in which she would get to shark another girl, but leaving her completely naked in public. However, due to a miscommunication resulting from her incomplete comprehension of the Japanese language, the people she meets with believe she wants to be the victim. With her having been so adamant about wanting to make the video, she ends up stripped completely naked and is forced to walk back to her hotel without her clothes. She finds the experience humiliating, but at the same time incredibly exhilarating. She decides that whatever else she does with her life, one thing she absolutely wants to do is to have her body and her sexuality exposed, and to expose the bodies and sexuality of other girls. In fact, this is how she ends up meeting Piper, who she ends up sharking, much to Piper’s amusement.

Non-consent Nancy- Nancy grew up as a shy, bisexual, African-American girl. She was bullied through much of her youth, but rather than resenting the bullies, she tried to befriend them in hopes that they would stop. She always tried to think of things they’d like, or ways she could be nice to them. Over time, she developed the coping mechanism of empathizing more with abusers and rapists and bullies than with their victims. In her mind, she often finds herself adamantly defending them and thinking that their victims should be punished. While in public, she maintains a persona of a typical college feminist/black lives matter/lgbt activist, she privately fetishizes victimization, often using her role as a rape-crisis counselor to arrange the re-victimization of women who confess their trauma to her, and to help and defend known rapists. She has an athletic build, due to exercising and women’s self-defense classes, but secretly, she uses her athleticism to abuse and rape other girls. She eventually develops a close friendship (in which she becomes something of a subordinate side-kick) with the artist Teira Volks.

Torture-lover Teira- German-born artist Teira Volks, average build, early 30’s, aryan features, straight blonde hair, perpetually serious expression. As a youth, Teira was close to her grandfather, who was a Nazi officer during WW2. She became fascinated with the idea of torture and suffering. Due to her connection to heinous war crimes, the idea of pain and despair felt very real to her. Not just like some abstract that people read in a history book. As she grew up, she became a controversial performance artist, often causing herself so much pain and harm that it became difficult for her to even find venues that would allow her to showcase such extreme self-abuse. In the past, she had sometimes employed assistants who would allow themselves to be abused, but she usually found them to be insufficiently masochistic, or unwilling to endure her forceful and pushy style of management. She eventually comes across Nancy, who she allows to participate in a performance with her. She finds that no matter how much Nancy hates what is being done to her, or how much she’s hurt or abused or humiliated; Nancy keeps coming back and never says a harsh word toward Teira. In time Teira takes on Nancy as a sort of full-time assistant, often treating Nancy as a slave; forcing her to participate in performances against her will. They meet Piper and Sherry at a performance near their college. The theme of the performance is “mirror,” in which anyone is allowed to do whatever they like to Teira, on the condition that they will allow it to be done to themselves. After Piper imposes her kinks on Teira, and subsequently submitting to having those same kinks imposed on herself, they become friends. With Piper, Teira, Nancy, and Sherry occasionally getting together and forming a tight-knit group.

Bimbo Bailee- Tall and pretty, in a trashy way. Bailee has huge fake tits and dresses in an incredibly exhibitionistic way. Her origins are a bit unclear as she seems too ditsy to remember ever not being a bimbo. Sherry, Piper, Nancy, and Teira meet her at a plastic surgeon's office. Piper makes an obscene comment upon noticing her (“Holy shit, look at the size of the fuck-bags on that little cock-socket!”), while Sherry discretely takes some upskirt pictures of her to post online later. After talking with her, they discover she seems to be profoundly stupid and impossibly gullible. As an example, after someone comments on her tramp stamp that reads “Butt Slut” she consistently says “Nuh uh, it’s a butterfly. That’s what the tattoo guy told me.” At times seeming to become flustered due to the fact that everyone keeps commenting that her tramp stamp (which she still insists is a butterfly) clearly reads “Butt Slut.” She seems to be so gullible that nearly any embarrassing trick or prank will work on her, regardless of how little thought is put into it. She’s consistently vain and often critical of the appearances of other women, generally contextualizing everything they do in the context of how attractive it makes them to men. She sometimes makes comments indicating that she doesn’t believe lesbians are sincere, and are only with each other as a way of getting attention from men. Despite her ditsyness and frequent critical comments about the other girls appearances, Piper, Sherry, Nancy, and Teira decide to invite her into their friend group due to how entertaining she is.

Each of these five characters will be getting their own story to start, and after they all meet up, there will sometimes be stories that involve all five of them, but more often stories will involve only a fraction of the full group.

--The Kinky Mass-Effect Fanfiction Trilogy--

This is the series that is the most fleshed out by far. This is going to be a trilogy of full length erotic novels set in the Mass Effect universe. The third book in this series was actually my first attempt at writing erotica (it sort of evolved from a sort of roleplay, and before I knew it, it was turning into a book). But a ways into the story, I realized that there was a lot of story leading up to the one I was writing, so I decided it needed to be a trilogy.

The story follows Dr. Biavalia Bi’tarah (usually called Beebee, by her friends), a dutiful asari slave and whore for her human master. Her playful sexuality and juvenile sense of humor belie her skill and competence as a fighter and engineer. The first book in the trilogy follows her as she deceives Commander Shepard (female) and Jack (aka Subject Zero) into helping her find someone who could aid her and her master into gaining an edge over the other slavers of the Terminus systems. Aria T’loak also makes an appearance. Throughout the first book, Beebee will happen across situations where sex and kink are preferable solutions to fighting (though there will still be a decent amount of action). And for those of you (like me) who were disappointed that Jack didn’t have any girl/girl romance options in the game, rest assured that the psychotic biotic will be having plenty of sapphic fun with the sapphire slut.

--Unnamed Female-Inferiority World--

At some point in the past, a genetic virus came about that only affected females. If untreated, it would degrade their DNA, and would eventually become fatal. It was discovered that the only way to repair the genetic damage was by administering incomplete pieces of human genetic material (i.e. human sperm). Early attempts to synthesize a more stable treatment were failures, and eventually society came to accept that all females would need to regularly absorb male semen, either anally, orally, or vaginally. This new sexual desperation among females reshaped how males and females interacted, with women having their very lives depending on how sexually appealing they were to men. Over the generations, women with unappealing bodies or personalities became scarce. Yet, every woman still knows that her long term survival depends on being more sexually appealing than the women around her, so even the most attractive and obedient females are still competitive.

Men in this world have become entitled and demanding as women have become more accomodating. Feminism is the greatest crime a female can commit and is punishable by a fate worse than death.

These stories will likely involve a strong emphasis on heavy and extreme kinks. Misogyny, rape, humiliation, torture, filth, and even snuff will be recurring themes. This is most likely going to be a series of stories exploring various aspects and characters of this alternative universe. While I’ve had multiple fantasies set in this universe, it’s probably the least developed so far.