#aka my favourite diluc rarepairs/not-so-rare-pairs as a list

[snekjoy]

One must imagine diluc ragnvindr as the main character in a dating sim game who has about twelve other people with crushes on him. The list goes as follows:

- His childhood friend he kissed once when he was 16 who he hasn't seen in ten years (Thoma)

- His ex-wife who he has complicated feelings towards (Jean)

- The girl from that flower shop who is obsessed with him (Donna)

- An old chinese man who keeps quoting ancient texts at him and saying he knew the guy who wrote it (probably a god) (Zhongli)

- The first one's boss who keeps flirting with him and suggesting they enter a polyamorous marriage in really unsubtle ways (Ayato)

- A gambler lady who thinks he's really good at killing people and keeps sexually (???) choking/strangling enemies they fight (Yelan)

- Some gang leader from Japan with big tits who keeps trying to beetle fight him and is endearingly stupid (Itto)

- An architect from Persia who is knee deep in debt and cares very heavily about everything (Kaveh)

- The architect's roommate, also a well-known Arabian scholar who never takes his headphones off and somehow still hears everything Diluc says (Alhaitham)

- A French prison warden who keeps reminding him to take care of himself while he struggles to reign in his own daughter (?? Child who is always with him??? Coworker?? Diluc can't tell) (Wriothesley)

- his doctor (Baizhu)

- That one night stand he had when he was on a killing spree who turned out to be a leading part of the organisation that killed his father and then fucked his brother but is still trying with him too for some fucking reason (Childe)