#aka i really REALLY needed to draw something war and peace related

[windsweptlassie]

world’s most anxious dad finally gets to relax with his son

very much referenced from this

[panharmonium]

I'm curious if you have any headcanon/any fic plans or just ideas about how Hunith learnt Will knew about Merlin's magic. Sorry if you already talked about it and has slipped out of my attention!

Oh my gosh, any message that asks me about Will or Hunith or Ealdor in any fashion makes me so happy; thank you!  

I'll avoid drawing up an outline for an exact scenario, only because I am always writing more fic about Merlin’s pre-Camelot life and if I end up deciding to actually do this in a fic I’ll be mad at myself for already typing it all out in meta XD  I will, however, talk about some general thoughts, because I do have solid opinions about certain aspects of this whole thing (all my own, obviously; folks are free to imagine this in different ways - these are just my own personal inferences from the canon we’re given).

Putting this under a cut because it got long - you always write me such detailed notes that I wanted to be thorough! <3

So!  Here are some of my thoughts about how Hunith learnt that Will knew about Merlin’s magic.

i. it was not careless.  

In my opinion, Will and Merlin, by the age where we meet them in canon, are not out there goofing around with Merlin’s magic in risky ways.  It doesn’t make sense for Merlin, who is old enough to understand the dangers to his own life and who is also desperately committed to making sure his mother never finds out that Will is in the know (because Merlin knows it won’t go well), and it definitely doesn’t make sense for Will, who, despite his fanon reputation for mischief, is...not actually shown to be like that in canon.

I talked before in my big meta dump about Will that I very much do not read the “he’s always been a troublemaker” line to be indicative of the “pranks and shenanigans” theme that I tend to see in a lot of fic.  The “troublemaker” line, in context, is not referring to Will causing mischief; it’s about Will’s inability to shut his mouth and stop stirring the pot, in the sense of him yelling about stuff that nobody else wants to think about; it’s about him not being able to put his head down and go with the flow.  It’s immediately followed by the line “they’re used to ignoring him,” and what we’re being told here is that Will is the cousin who can’t stop himself from getting political at the holiday dinner table even when the rest of the family is begging him to let them have one single meal in peace.  He cannot let things go, and the rest of his neighbors are completely sick of it (see: Hunith’s ZERO patience with Will when he challenges Arthur in front of the community).

Canon Will, in contrast to some fanon interpretations, is actually a very intense, guarded person?  He’s suspicious and pragmatic and risk-averse.  And I just think it’s important to remember that Will, in his current situation, does not have a lot of time to be messing around.  He was orphaned and left to run a whole homestead as a child.  That’s like...he’s doing the work of an entire family.  Life in Ealdor already leaves little room to slack off, and Will is completely overburdened - somebody in his situation would be desperately busy, almost all of the time, and always on the verge of a potential disaster, if he fell behind on anything.  

So I just don’t read him as someone who is out doing silly things with Merlin in a way that got them discovered by Hunith.  Like - Merlin isn’t careless enough to be goofing off in his own house, for example, and Will isn’t a character who’s daring Merlin to do foolish things for the fun of it.  Merlin is comfortable using his magic around Will, definitely, and we know he’s had at least one mishap in the past (the tree), but at this point in their lives, I don’t see either of them as frivolous or clueless enough to use magic in a way that could get them caught by anyone, or for the purpose of risky/trivial games.

ii. merlin was the one who let it slip

I personally think the lead-up to Hunith discovering Will’s involvement was preceded by two things:

an increase in external stressors (related to the political situation between Camelot and Cenred’s kingdom), making Merlin’s position in Ealdor progressively more precarious/dangerous

Merlin becoming increasingly frustrated, rebellious, and unwilling to hide himself the way his mother wanted him to

The first point is something that I've incorporated into fic, so I think @blueclaw7 is already familiar with it :)  But essentially, when I was collecting info on Ealdor and Cenred's kingdom prior to a previous fic-writing endeavour, there were a few things that led me to wonder just what sort of trouble was brewing in that corner of the world, prior to Merlin's departure:

We know that Cenred makes agreements with slave traders, allowing them to work certain areas of his land without interference (see: Cenred's discussion with Morgause about Jarl in 3.12 - “He's been working our western border for months...We have an understanding.”)  Cenred likely would not allow this unless it benefited him in some way, so I think we can safely assume that he is receiving some sort of kickback from allowing slavers to operate in his kingdom, either in the form of financial compensation or perhaps by having people like Jarl on-call in case Cenred himself needs specific targets rounded up.

We also know that sometime prior to 1.10, Cenred's kingdom and Camelot signed some sort of peace treaty, which according to Uther was “years in the making.”  We're not told how long the two kingdoms had been enemies before that, but my personal interpretation is that they have been at odds for a long time, because the peace treaty doesn’t appear to be very successful - by 2.12, Uther says, “Our treaty with Cenred no longer holds.  We are at war,” despite the fact that we actually haven't even met Cenred in the show yet and he hasn't attacked Camelot or anything (he doesn't agree to do that until Season 3, when Uther is incapacitated and the kingdom is weak).  Uther also later refers to Cenred as Camelot’s “sworn enemy.”  So the treaty just appears to have been a temporary, shaky peace between kingdoms that are frequently in conflict, the terms of which we are not privy to.

We know that Uther “offers a handsome reward for anyone with magic” (2.09, when the bounty hunter shows up with Freya), and we know that normal people will turn others over to bounty hunters for their own benefit (“How did he find you?” / “You can't always trust people.”)

We know that Aredian (the witchfinder) has been operating “in foreign lands” (aka, not Camelot).

So, the question I asked myself was this: why would Cenred and Uther even agree to a peace treaty in the first place, when their kingdoms are clearly constantly at odds with one another?  And looking at the other tidbits of information above, the framework I constructed for myself was that I personally think part of the aforementioned treaty involves Cenred turning people with magic over to Uther - and perhaps allowing Uther's agents over the border to do their own hunting - in exchange for some kind of compensation (probably financial).  We know Cenred is greedy (he's aiming to conquer Camelot even though he is, per his own words, “rich and powerful already”), and we know he canonically has the means to give Uther what he wants (agreements with slave traders working within his borders).  And given that the treaty appears to have been a fairly recent development in 1.10, my personal read is that this treaty was signed sometime before Merlin left Ealdor, and that it prompted an uptick in dangerous activity that frightened Merlin's mother and made her more willing to send him away.  Bounty hunters nabbing people on the road, slave traders being given the freedom to operate without interference, rumors of single agents like the Witchfinder roaming the countryside - all of this would lead to the far more immediate concern of “what happens if somebody in Ealdor thinks Merlin might be magic and decides to make a quick shilling by turning him in????”

I think that is Hunith's biggest concern.  Ealdor is poor.  And Merlin himself says his departure was prompted by not being able to trust the people around him.  When Freya tells him, “you can't always trust people,” he replies, “I know.  That's why I left home.”  And if there were suddenly a higher demand for people with magic, due to Cenred and Uther's arrangement, then there would be more incentive for regular people to look for a way they could turn it to their advantage, especially if they've already been conditioned to see magic as an evil/dangerous thing.  

I think this leads to Hunith being even more cautious, and putting even tighter restrictions on Merlin re: where he can go and when he can be out and who he can go wandering around with, and even on using magic for little things at home where no one can see.  And the problem with this is that Merlin won't tolerate it anymore, not the way he did when he was younger.  Not because he doesn't want to listen to her or because he doesn't understand that she's trying to help him, but because he just can't.  He can't.  It's killing him.  He tells Gaius in 1.01, “if I can't use magic, I might as well die,” and that’s not just him being dramatic; he really feels that way.  He doesn’t just have magic, he is magic.  He can't suppress it that way, without feeling like he's killing himself.

So, to bring us back around to the point of this segment - I think what ends up happening is that Merlin starts pushing back on Hunith’s restrictions, not so he can goof around and do stupid things, but so he can live his life in a way that doesn't make him feel like he's suffocating, so he can just be, without feeling like his entire existence is a crime.  I think the increased pressure drives him more and more frequently to Will, the only person around whom Merlin can exist as a complete person, and I think he becomes increasingly resistant to his mother's directives, and I think his mother gets more and more frustrated with him, because she sees it as him needlessly risking his life, but Merlin is tired of hearing that he can't trust anybody, because he CAN trust somebody; he has somebody to trust right now and he’s had them for ages, and he doesn't think things have to be so dire all the time, if his mother would just see that, but she won't -

And then, when his frustration reaches a boiling point, Merlin accidentally spills the beans.

I don't think Hunith walks in on Merlin doing magic in front of Will, personally.  I think Merlin slips up and tells her, in the course of their increasingly frequent, tense conflicts between “you can't trust ANYBODY/things are too dangerous” and “i CAN trust somebody/i can’t live like this anymore.” 

I think he lets it slip in an argument, as a frustrated justification for “it doesn't have to be like this all the time; things could be better; will's known about it for X years and nothing bad has ever happened to me.”  

And then, of course, it goes very, very badly.

Which brings us to Point #3 -

iii. it was a Disaster.

What I mean by this is that Hunith discovering that Will knew about Merlin’s magic was not a chill situation.  It did not go over well, and it created an interpersonal crisis between the three of them that persists all the way into 1.10.

We’ve already heard canon confirmation of this - “when she found out you knew, she was SO angry” - and it’s obvious that this conflict was never resolved.  I’ve already talked in another post about Hunith’s weird disinterest in/disapproval of Will in favor of Arthur (even after Will’s death!), and Will clearly isn’t feeling very generous with her in 1.10, either - they only interact once, when Hunith snaps at Will to “keep quiet” after he challenges Arthur in front of the village, and after that, they never talk again.  They never go anywhere near each other, in fact.

I know fandom likes to headcanon Hunith as the ultimate mom who is super generous with everyone and would instantly adopt all of Merlin’s friends out of an overabundance of motherly love, but 1.10 tells a very different story about her relationship with Will, and it’s clearly not a completely new issue.  Merlin knew his mother wouldn’t react well to finding out that he’d shared his secret with Will.  It’s why he lied in the first place.  Whatever the relationship between the three of them was before the reveal, Merlin knew that a history of positive interactions wouldn’t make a difference if the truth came out.  His mother would never be okay with Will knowing.

And he was right!  Because Hunith finding out the truth fractures that relationship.  It’s what finally prompts Hunith to send Merlin away.  And that, of course, makes things worse, because a) Will never did anything to deserve that reaction, and b) as I’ve talked about in another post, Merlin disappears without even telling Will he’s leaving.  He just vanishes.  And Will, blindsided, is left in Ealdor with Hunith, who was party to that decision, and he is so...I don’t even know how to describe how full of grief and rage I would be, if I were in his situation.  Merlin was the only good thing in Will’s life. 

I don’t think Will wants to be anywhere near Hunith, after that.  I think he avoids her like the plague.  I think the only reason Will even knows anything about where Merlin is or what he’s doing is because Hunith is careful to chat about it with other people in casual conversation, while Will is within earshot (hence why Will later says, “I hear you’re skivvying for some prince”).  And I think Hunith is probably making a misguided attempt to be kind, by doing that - giving Will a way to stay sort of updated even though they’re not speaking to each other - but I also don’t think her efforts are effective, at all, because the only thing her secondhand updates do for Will is hammer home the fact that Merlin is writing to Hunith instead of him, that Merlin hasn’t directed Hunith to relay Will any message, that Merlin really did just leave without saying goodbye and apparently has no intention of contacting Will again.  And Will doesn’t know why Merlin did that, or what he did to make Merlin not want him anymore, but because Will is who he is, he ends up feeling like Merlin must have never cared about him that much in the first place, and it was just that Will misread the whole relationship; he got his hopes up and let his guard down and believed that somebody cared for him, and he should have known better, because everybody ALWAYS leaves him, and he was stupid to think this time would be different.  And he is so angry at himself, but he is also devastated, and impossibly lonely, because he has nobody in his life, and he has to just sit and simmer in his own pain, because Merlin is gone, and Will would rather crawl over a bed of hot coals than go anywhere near Hunith right now.

And I honestly don’t blame Will for avoiding her.  It’s like...I hate to put this on Hunith, because I do appreciate her in other areas, but there’s just no getting around this: the way she views and deals with Will is markedly different from the way she treats Merlin’s Camelot friends, even though she barely knows them, and despite the fact that she’s perfectly aware that Arthur hates sorcery.  She’s happy to ignore Merlin’s friendship with Will all throughout 1.10, even though that’s the relationship that is in the most desperate need of attention, and instead she chooses to focus on/encourage/praise Merlin’s relationships with people who hate the thing that makes him who he is.  And that is just so...bizarre to me, and I think...I really believe there is a part of Hunith that blames Will for everything that happened, even if it’s subconscious.  Like - I think there’s a part of her that believes that if Will hadn’t found out about the magic, Merlin wouldn’t have been “in danger,” and she wouldn’t have been put in the difficult position of sending Merlin away.  I’m not sure if she truly believed Will was going to sell Merlin to a bounty hunter when he got desperate enough for money (see above re: Will’s situation being a precarious one, survival-wise), or if it was more her fear that Merlin would be too trusting now that one person had accepted him (what if Merlin went and told someone else, because it worked out the first time???  What if he let this thing with Will lull him into a false sense of security?)  But whatever her reasons, she still ends up pushing Will away.  She never treats him with the same kind of solicitous interest that she extends to Merlin’s new companions, and I do think it all comes back to that moment when she found out that he knew.

It’s hardly rational, given what we know about how dedicated Will actually is to protecting Merlin’s secret.  And I don’t think Hunith is like...actively taking it out on him.  But the attitude is still present, as an undercurrent, and I have to be honest about this: the feeling I get from Hunith in 1.10 (and the vibe that I imagine Will was getting from her while Merlin was gone) is that she thinks Merlin is much better off now that he’s moved on from Ealdor, and that leaving Will behind was ultimately best for everyone, and that Will needs to just get over it and understand that he’s not a part of Merlin’s life anymore, so everyone can be happy that Merlin has met such fantastic, fascinating new friends. 

That’s what I hear her saying, when I see the way she completely ignores him while simultaneously loving on the Camelot crew.  That’s what Will hears, too, even if she doesn’t say it out loud.  

And honestly, my heart breaks for him.  He deserved more than that. 

(tangentially, but - I think it bears mentioning, given certain fic trends I have seen, that Merlin himself does not share this viewpoint.  Merlin has never and will never consider his new friends to be a “step up” from Will, and he has never and will never consider Will to be a “past” or less immediate part of his life.  Even after Will is dead, Merlin refuses to tolerate even the barest suggestion of this from anybody - when Arthur tries to say that Will “was a close friend,” Merlin corrects him, saying “He still is.”  Will is just as relevant and meaningful to Merlin in Camelot as he was when Merlin was still at home, and the fact that Hunith doesn’t assign Will as much importance anymore does not in any way correspond to Merlin’s own feelings on the subject.) 

So - the point of all this is just to say that Hunith finding out about Will isn’t an event that ends with all of them coming together and collectively deciding to send Merlin to Camelot while Will and Hunith promise to look after each other while Merlin is away.  Whatever relationship the three of them had before this happened, it’s broken after Hunith learns the truth.  Hunith and Will are completely done with each other, after Merlin leaves.  Merlin and Will are obviously plunged into an incredibly messy situation, thanks to Merlin vanishing without a word.  And even Merlin and his mother have tension - Merlin references the big blow-up to Will in 1.10, but there’s also a moment in episode 1.01, too, that is VERY subtle but also very telling, when Gaius says “your mother asked me to look after you.”  Merlin’s response is just, “Yes,” but the way he delivers it - he looks away, and his mouth tenses up, and there’s this little hesitation and then the tone is almost - rueful, like there’s more he’d like to say but he refrains.  It’s like a “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all” vibe.  And the reason for that is because the circumstances under which his mother asked Gaius to look after him were a mess.  Merlin tells us straight-up in 1.10 that he didn’t want to leave home.  The entire thing was a disaster.

iv.  the reason hunith was “so angry” is because will did not find out about merlin's magic by accident

I think I've talked about this briefly before, but here it is in more detail: I am firmly convinced that Merlin told Will about his magic, as opposed to Will finding out accidentally.

It's not something we can actually know in a canon sense, obviously.  And I know the “Will almost has an accident and Merlin uses magic to help him” motif is more common in fic.  But the reason I’m so set on this is because of how Merlin describes Hunith's reaction to finding out that Will knew.  

“When she found out you knew - she was so angry.”  The way Merlin says that - he shakes his head, almost in awe, like it was something almost frightening to behold - the way he puts an emphasis on “so angry” - to me, this has always been an indication that Merlin voluntarily disclosed his magic to Will.  We know enough about Hunith to be familiar with how gentle and calm she is, and how much she loves Merlin, and how kind and understanding she is with him.  I think if she learned that Will had found out about Merlin's magic in an accidental way - ie, in a way Merlin could not have reasonably prevented - then even though she would still have wished that Merlin had told her sooner, she wouldn't have reacted in a way that made Merlin reflect on it like she was scary-angry.  I think she would have understood, if he explained that he'd been forced into a situation to use his magic to help someone or prevent a bad accident from happening.

However - if Merlin had TOLD Will about his magic, voluntarily, when he didn't have to, just because he felt like it, despite all of Hunith's warnings and all of her efforts to keep Merlin safe - that, I think, is something that would have prompted the kind of anger Merlin references.

To Hunith, that would be unconscionably reckless.  After all she's done to keep Merlin alive, after spending every day of her life sick and sleepless with worry - to have Merlin so easily throw her work away like that, in blatant defiance of every cautionary thing she's ever told him - it's a slap in the face.  Plus, Merlin is now in more danger (she thinks) which just amplifies her fear, and thus her fury.

But what she doesn’t understand is that Merlin didn't do it to hurt her.  He didn't do it because he doesn't appreciate how hard she works to keep him safe.  He did it because he had to.  There came a moment, at some point in the past, where he became so lonely and so desperate to be seen that he made a choice, took a risk, and put his life in someone else's hands.

And he was rewarded for that choice!  Merlin never, ever would have made it in Ealdor without Will’s honest companionship.  A Merlin who did not have a single friend to know and love him for those first two decades would have been utterly unrecognizable by the time he arrived in Camelot - if he even survived long enough to get there.

But Hunith doesn't understand the depth of Merlin's desperation.  She thinks that him telling Will was a foolish, uncalled-for risk, when for Merlin it was a lifesaving necessity.  

So, I think that this is part of what makes Hunith react so badly.  And I also think the severity of her reaction (and the ultimate tragic outcome that follows in 1.10) is something that lingers in Merlin’s mind for a long time, because he never willingly discloses his secret to anyone again.  Gaius and Lancelot find out by accident.  Freya, Gilli, and Daegal find out by necessity, because Merlin needs to leverage his magic in one way or another in order to save their lives.  Even Arthur is a forced confession, demanded by desperate circumstances.  

Merlin doesn't choose to reveal himself to those people.  It's something that's pushed onto him.  Will is a singular instance.  Merlin has only voluntarily shared his secret with one person - just because he wanted to, not because he was forced to, just because he trusted them, just because he wanted that connection so badly.  

And it leads to such painful consequences, in the end, that he never does it again.

in conclusion:

So, to summarize, my foundational thoughts on how this went down can basically be boiled down to those four things: it wasn't the result of carelessness, Merlin was the one who let it slip, it was a huge disaster with long-lasting consequences, and part of the reason why it went so badly is because Hunith found out that Merlin had voluntarily told Will about his magic, as opposed to Will finding out accidentally.  

But, as always, those are just my own personal thoughts about it, and I am still 100% happy to read about all sorts of differing envisionings of this scenario - nothing is confirmed in canon, obviously, so for people who imagine this event differently, have at it!  The world can always use a little more of Merlin’s pre-canon life, if you ask me. :D

[fauzhee10069]

Made too soon? My ‘woke’ OC in a not so woke times

When I was browsing my old drawings, I found one particular work, a work I made for an OC contest back in early 2016:

dA link: Pre-battle Briefing

She belongs to Tolkien’s world, in The Silmarillion. You know? As his fictional universe was created in 1937, surely the standard of female’s portrayal was quite different than today’s standard. You can read further about that here but in short:

"Tolkien's heroines have been both praised and severely criticized", and that his fictional women indeed have an ambiguous image, of "both passivity and empowerment". - Weronika Łaszkiewicz

I was into ‘prominent female character’ at the time, yeah… I prefer to call it ‘prominent’ rather than ‘strong’ because the later often associates with being physically strong/dominant/masculine. I mean, I want my female character to have importance in her role to the plot, but she doesn’t have to be necessarily strong in hand-to-hand combat, genius or superior to the others… problems that are in Dysney’s Rey and many live action princesses (particularly Mulan) at the moment.

What was her story?

My name is Megileth (or Macilё in quenya), I am a Noldorin elf who was born in Valinor near the end of the Years of the Trees. As a Noldo, I’m not really skilled at activities such as gardening and weaving, the results of my work is always messy, let alone to do the work of men like carvers and blacksmiths.

The contest was creating an OC based on yourself (a self-insert), of course I was being honest that I suck at sewing, weaving, and any handicraft works, something that is highlighted in the Tolkien’s world through female characters like Vairë, Míriel and Arwen. However, my OC Megileth also sucks at men’s works (just like me irl).

I feel that accidentally, Megileth is like Dysney’s (animated) Mulan in 1998 that she hardly fits in with the expectations of Chinese female as ‘the perfect bride’ of the time, but when she finally joined the army (aka ‘the world of men’), she was also struggling to be ‘a man’ and to blend into their world. You can watch more about the analysis of Dysney’s Mulan (both 1998 and 2020) here:

Mulan: A Case of Failed Empowerment

During my childhood, I’m interested in studying political science and strategy of war. My father believed in my potential so he made me study and also taught me swordmanship alongside my brothers. When I reached majority, my father and I joined together in Fingolfin’s entourage to middle-earth. Later, I served as military strategist and an advisor in Hithlum from Fingolfin’s through Fingon’s reign.

This is my build up to give her that ‘prominent role’ in story, as The Silmarillion has many battle in it, I wanted her to be involved with those. During the battles, I didn't make her a strong fighter, but rather a character behind the scenes who works as a military advisor. Surely she can fight too but I gave her that ability more as a requirement because she had to be on the battlefield, I thought it would be convenient if she could fight and strong enough to protect herself.

But at this point, it is also my concern that she could be a borderline Mary Sue as her prominence may competes with Galadriel, Eowyn and Haleth. As a side note, Megileth was not meant to work as a sole strategist, she worked alongside several other advisors in strategizing (mostly men with some women too).

I am also one of the advisors who participated during the Nirnaeth Arnœdiad. I'm proposing a marching formation to Anfauglith. Although I know how to fight, but since my martial skill is mediocre at best, I prefer to stay behind the army and observing the situation.

As I wanted her to be ‘prominent’, I gave her role in “Nirnaeth Arnœdiad”. Even though I wanted her to be a character who gets prominent role, I also refrained from making her a Mary Sue, that’s why I gave her limitation that she was just pretty average in hand-to-hand combat.

At the end of the battle which I barely survived, I wandered as nomadic until I reached Eregion and stayed there. Later, after Eregion was destroyed by Sauron, I along with the other survivors fled and settled in Rivendell. I spent my life there to teach the younger generations to prepare themselves if someday war will happen again.

After her role in climactic event ended, I always like the idea of peaceful retirement, that’s why I made her survive and settle down as a tutor.

The Background of Megileth’s story

In the description in my submission, I’ve written as follow:

The reason I chose this role if I live in Tolkien’s world is because I want to defy the stereotypical views on majority of women during middle-age that they are often portrayed and positioned as healers, wives, beautiful maiden, being powerful with magical powers or stayed behind (that's why women like Haleth and Eowyn are awesome).

Perhaps, I was having mentality of “i'm not like other girls” at the time but I am always like this since my childhood… I like to defy what is defined as “mostly/stereotypical/standard/commonly”... whatever. If all my classmates chose blue, I would choose red.

Perhaps, my upbringing from my father also had an effect on that: he wanted me to be an independent woman, not always dependent on men (it was also due to him being made to work so far from our home that we have to be separated for months). I can't always depend on my father so I have to be able to live without always relying on men.

In addition, the role as military advisor is kinda unique. The real me also very fond of real-time strategy and simulation games. The figure who inspired me in this role and background is Qin Liangyu, female general of Ming dynasty.

I am a history lover, I like to study history from different cultures. I'm not always fixated on prominent female historical figures, but whenever I stumble across them, I'm always interested to learn more about them.

Although my OC might deviates from most of the female characters in Tolkien’s world, I am against Mary Sue and as much as possible I tried not to make my OC to be that. Before I gave Megileth an important role as military advisor, I asked myself: “is that even possible?” Then I found some excerpts from The Histories of Middle Earth vol. 10 “Laws and Customs Among the Eldar” that may support the possibility of Megileth’s role:

In all such things, not concerned with the bringing forth of children, the neri and nissi (that is, the men and women) of the Eldar are equal—

There are indeed some differences between the natural inclinations of neri and nissi, and other differences that have been established by custom (varying in place and in time, and in the several races of the Eldar). For instance, the arts of healing, and all that touches on the care of the body, are among the Eldar most practised by the nissi; whereas it was the elven-men who bore arms at need.

Indeed in dire straits or desperate defence, the nissi fought valiantly, and there was less difference in strength or speed between elven-men and elven-women that had not borne child than is seen among mortals. On the other hand many elven-men were great healers and skilled in the lore of living bodies,

but all these things, and other matters of labor and play, or of deeper knowledge concerning being and the life of the World, may at different times be pursued by any among the Noldor, be they neri or nissi.

- (Morgoth's Ring, "The Second Phase", Laws and Customs Among the Eldar, pages 209-214)

Based on my interpretation, this indicates that although certain custom may develop traditional roles for elvish men or women, it does not mean that these roles must be strictly performed. For example, when generally the arts of war are most practiced by men and the arts of healing are most practiced by women, there are also men who choose to become healers instead of warriors and women who are more interested in learning things that considered masculine.

I was happy that I found those excerpts, they gave me ‘a green light’ for the role of Megileth. However, despite the existence of the excerpts, criticism of sexism in Tolkien’s works remain because the lack of actual story/narrative that reflects that.

Then, what was the outcome of the contest?

I did not win.

That’s it. The reason why I did not win and why the winners won remains a mystery to this day.

I didn't expect to get the first place, but I did hope I could at least be runner-up or third, or even to be part of honorable mentions if there is any. If I'm being honest, of course I was disappointed… for not winning any place, but the bigger thing was that I don't know why?

I think I was too ambitious or overconfident at the time, I thought that my concept of Megileth’s story was quite unique and deserves the attention from the judges, I thought that my drawing was quite good (not a top-tier but still acceptable at least). In the end, I did not win anything.

What was the reason they won? What was the reason I did not win? Actually, what were the qualifications to win? My lack of knowledge about this made it even more difficult for me to accept my loss. Had I known the reasons, I will be more relieved to accept my loss: “so, that’s why she won… hmm, congratulation!”

Then to ease my disappointment at that time, I wrote a post about BEST WAYS TO ANNOUNCE CONTEST WINNERS. Although that post looks like a genuinely helpful post, I actually wrote it as "f*ck u!" to the judges, “you hurt my feeling for disregarding my work without reason!” Yeah, I was a whining womanchild and acting immature like a special snowflake.

Was this related to ‘wokeness’?

Of course up to this day, finding the real reason for that loss is absolutely impossible, but in this year 2020, I try to reflect on this matter.

Was my OC too far-fetched? Was Megileth a Mary Sue? Was Megileth incompatible within Tolkien’s world?

With the lack of actual reason and qualification, I have tried to guess it through the winner.

I am Natalie, Queen of Erebor and Wife of Thorin Oakenshield. I am standing with Thorin on our bedroom balcony, in my nightgown with the view from Erebor behind us. This is after the Battle of the five armies and I have just told Thorin that I am pregnant.

The drawing is beautiful so I don’t have any complain there. The winner created her OC as the Queen of Erebor and Thorin’s wife. The illustration is quite romantic, she was also inspired by Agmir's Seasick fanfiction, a self-insert fanfiction with Thorin/Reader.

The concept is pretty average but quite romantic. I've been reading various fanfics for more than a decade, surely self-insert, OC and reader-insert have become common things in various fandoms. Many readers like to project themselves to be paired with fictional characters with charming appearance.

Apart from that, the role of a queen and someone’s wife is also quite common in the Tolkien’s world. Natalie has a role that most of the female characters there have had, as a queen and a loving wife. She stayed inside the palace, welcoming Thorin in their bedroom, giving him happy news of her pregnancy.

Is it this average role that trumps the (so-called) unique role of my OC?

Natalie wears nightgown (feminity) whereas Megileth wears armor (masculinity).

Natalie fits so well in the world of Tolkien whereas Megileth might be trying too hard to be special in that world.

I’m not criticizing the role of Natalie, being a wife and stay-at-home mom does not make you an inferior woman (the funny thing is, I am dreaming of that life right now). But do you think that Megileth is a Mary Sue… as a female character who wants to get a role in the major event of Nirnaeth Arnœdiad?

Was that what the judges thought at the time?

Another interesting thing behind Megileth's story is that initially, I intended to make a female elf OC as a healer.

…the arts of healing, and all that touches on the care of the body, are among the Eldar most practised by the nissi (women)…

- (Morgoth's Ring, "The Second Phase", Laws and Customs Among the Eldar, pages 209-214)

Had Megileth been a healer (perhaps her name might not be “Megileth”) as I had considered back then, would she fit better in the world of Tolkien? Would I have a chance to win?

It was early 2016, although the term "woke" has already been around back then, it was not yet a trend as it is today. I also wonder, is it possible that the judges at that time become woke today if this contest was held this year?

Or perhaps they themselves actually despise the 'woke culture'.

Afterall, it was just a small contest, something that I no longer need to ponder about it.

Most obvious woke culture in these days can be seen in various Hollywood reboots and Dysney’s live actions (particularly, the princesses).

Looking at those princesses and their portrayal in live actions, looking at Mulan in her 2020 live actions version… perhaps a character like Megileth is finally able to get her time to shine.

But expect the criticisms that might attack her as well.

Megileth and Tauriel

Reflecting on this made me think of Tauriel, she is an OC created by Peter Jackson in The Hobbits film trilogy. Tauriel was a wood-elf (silvan) of Mirkwood and captain of the Elven guard of Thranduil’s Woodland Realm. Throughout the film, a subplot develops involving romance between her and Kíli.

The introduction of Tauriel brought quite a cacophony to the fans, various criticisms had attacked her conception. Just like my OC, she got ‘special’ position that isn’t common for the female elves in Tolkien’s world, as a warrior and head of the Woodland Realm guard.

Tauriel’s portrayal in PJ’s The Hobbits struck her like a double edged sword. The canon extremists criticized Tauriel's status as a female warrior and leader of Thranduil’s elven guard, “Tolkien did not write his female elves like that!” On the other hand, feminists also criticized her for being the love interest, “her love story with Kíli was unnecessary!”

There is a legit criticism regarding Tauriel’s character but there is also fan who defended her in the movies, that her existence has brought improvement for The Hobbits.

Tauriel was probably one of the woke characters who came really earlier.

We may not be able to create a perfect character. Among appreciations for your character, there will definitely be criticisms that accompany it. I think, it is enough for us to be happy that the characters we make successfully bring the attention.

As if someone would care about my OC Megileth XD

Self-Insert and Mary Sue

Why do people write SIs? Because to write a decent main character, you need to have a good idea of who you're writing, and everybody knows themselves well enough to write about. A Self-Insert is not only the easiest character to write about, it is the default character to write about. This is particularly prevalent in fanfic, where the setting is already filled in, and the inspiration comes from someone automatically applying their default character. You have to deliberately create an original story, but a Self-Insertion fanfic writes itself (at least loosely).

Going for an SI over an OC can be a lazy choice, and if that laziness continues to the rest of the work, it can be an indicator of a poor story, but this isn't a flaw inherent to SI stories so much as SIs simply having a lower entry bar.

A Self-Insert is also generally considered to be a fair character to write about. ...An SI is assumed to be an audience member, an 'everyman' to some reasonable degree (even if it is assumed that gun-enthusiasts like to write stories in which guns exist, and so on), and this is a key detail. There's never a hard rule on what's considered wanky, but everyone agrees on a gut level that it's fair to write a story on the premise of “this is what I would do in this situation”. Fanfic is often written on the premise of an altered, different or additional protagonist doing things differently/better/more interestingly than the original story, and the use of an everyman as protagonist is usually considered a fair standard, as it usually below the accepted 'power level' of the setting. ...Even the addition of meta-knowledge, whilst sometimes absurdly potent, is sufficiently within the domain of 'the everyman' that people will read it without harming their SoD, so long as there is a tolerable excuse for why that knowledge is present (though many people do include it as their one unicorn).

Furthermore, there is sometimes an element of challenge to it. Many competent original writers avoid giving their protagonists the idiot ball by making a situation really, really crappy. Thus it becomes for many a question of “can I write an interesting story in which the problem is solved better than in canon?” So not only is the SI trying to do a better job than the original characters, the SI-writer themself is trying to do a better job than the original writer.

To be honest, I think the clearest indicator of a Mary Sue is when they stop being an 'everyman', and start being someone whom the audience cannot bring themselves to relate to.

...A non-Mary Sueish Self-Insert is narratively justified. Narrative justification is easier when the character isn't highly-competent, uncommonly popular, or possessed of traits that would not be expected to come about naturally from the circumstances of that story or character, but I feel that the ability of the story to make any oddities of the characters, setting or plot seem reasonable, logical and believable is the ultimate determiner of whether a protagonist is a Mary Sue.

– frozenchicken, from ‘Sufficient Velocity’ forum.

The contest that I participated in was to make a self-insert character (a character based on yourself), in Tolkien’s world.

Megileth is a character that I created based on myself and what was on my mind (at that time).

I was into prominent female figures (be it in fiction or in history), therefore I also wanted to make a character that fits into that.

The idea of Megileth was also influenced after I read several times about the criticisms of Tolkien’s female characters.

…it becomes for many a question of “can I write an interesting story in which the problem is solved better than in canon?” So not only is the SI trying to do a better job than the original characters, the SI-writer him/herself is trying to do a better job than the original writer…

Perhaps I accidentally made Megileth an improved female character of Tolkien, something that is very trending in the circle of feminism today (Hollywood reboots & Dysney’s live-actions) but very much despised by canon purists and casual audiences.

And the judges may have thought that “Megileth can’t be Tolkien’s character,” “Megileth is Mary Sue,” etc (despite her weaknesses and my careful survey not to defy the canon).

I was considering Megileth as a healer, there are many female elves in Tolkien’s world who are healers, according to “Of the Laws and Customs Among the Eldar”:

The scholiast claims that most female Elves do not fight or kill, because it diminishes healing power in which they have chosen to specialize, and that those male Elves who are healers "abstained from hunting, and went not to war until the last need."

Going by the ‘canon’ rules, Megileth as healer can’t be a warrior, she cannot go to war unless until the last need.

Megileth as a healer would lowkey reflect my childhood aspiration to be a doctor. But for a self-insert character (based on myself), she would hardly reflect me at the time (in early 2016). Because by then, I had long neglected my old aspiration that is already impossible to realize.

I thought that ‘Megileth as an elf warrior and advisor’ would reflect me better than ‘Megileth as a healer’.

Then, comparing Megileth with Natalie (the winner) without knowing what the reasons were from the judges regarding the result, I can only assume that Megileth failed to portray Tolkien’s (female) character while Natalie did it very well.

I Nestad in-Edhil: The Healing of the Eldar

To be honest, I felt there was a sense of contrary to this contest. As the contest was about self-inserting, surely I created Megileth to reflect myself (as much as possible) in Tolkien’s world. Then what about the standard for not making her ‘Mary Sue’?

I didn't think about making Megileth so fit into that world, as in giving her the average roles (healers, wives/lovers/queens or handmaidens) because such a role would not reflect who I was at the time, giving her those roles would make her no longer me.

I was not in love to anyone, I did not fantasize about having romantic relationships with any fictional characters. Therefore I can’t be just <insert canon male character name here>’s lover.

Then, my solution to not making her a Mary Sue was that her fighting ability is average, that she was not the only advisor the Noldor relied on in every battlefield, that she is not an exceptionally genius but her capability is quite acknowledged, that she was involved in a losing battle (Nirnaeth Arnœdiad), and although she survived, she does not make a big name like the legendary Galadriel.

Plus, she doesn’t heal people because she can’t be a healer!

I think it was my mistake for participating in the contest, I was tempted by the gifts they offered for the winner. I shouldn't have been involved in that contest.

Self-Insert character is our personal character, they are “us if we are in a world of fiction”. There should be no character better than another. No one should win over another.

Of course my loss at the contest felt like a personal attack on me. “So I made a bad character? But that character is based on me, am I bad then?”

Since then, I have never taken part in any OC contests, especially if it's based on myself.

…an SI can be written like any other character, with flaws and mistakes, while a Mary Sue is by definition flawless.

Of course, it is perfectly possible for a character to be both an SI and a Mary Sue, and it is my understanding that this is the general state of affairs. It is something about writing about themselves that makes authors unwilling to acknowledge their flaws.

…SIs do frequently fall under the Mary Sue label, but not all SIs are Mary Sue fics, and not all Mary Sues are SIs. Thus, it is possible to write a non-MS SI, but it is not possible to write a good MS fic.

- Grey Rook, from ‘Sufficient Velocity’ forum.

Self-inserts are simply characters based on ourselves. People write SIs for the wish fulfillment and power fantasy. It depends on our imagination and how we fantasize, it is possible to make realistic self-insert without making them a Mary Sue, but there will always be a risk of turning your self-insert into Mary Sue.

I think it's not really fair to use “Self-Insert theme” as a contest, it would be better to have it as an event. Artists and writers can have fun with their self-inserts without having to win or lose, without having to feel that their characters are better or worse than the others.

[mysticalmusicwhispers]

What do you think about aph South Korea?

Thank you so much for the ask!!

SK’s a cool dude in my opinion! He’s a bit airheaded sometimes, but really goofy and fun to be around! Plus I think I mentioned here he’s a nerdy jock and I stand by that 100%. 

I’m a bit to a lot annoyed by the manga’s presentation of him, aka groping and awful stuff like that, as well as how he fawns over Japan and China and is really, really, really dumb. Like I’d totally understand how Japan and China feel about him because I’d kick him out of my house in a heartbeat and never let him back. Therefore my brain, being convenient, has sorted out everything I don’t like and put in some other traits that make his character more bearable, and I like him a lot more now.

I want to think of him as compassionate but somewhat untrusting because of the Korean War and everything that’s happened, also Wikipedia’s Korean history and relations with people makes him (and North Korea as well I guess) look extremely ambitious (?) because they fought a lot of wars left and right with neighbors. He’s toned down a bit to a lot in modern day, mostly minding his own business and trying to be nice to people so he can get favors from them, but I think he has more heart and good intentions in his friend-building a little more than some sly old dirtbags. He’s pretty good with trendy stuff in normal human culture; I mean Korean k-pop has kinda a lot of fans, so I think he’s pretty good at pleasing people and being a trendsetter (so hIP AnD cOol).

Also he’s pretty smart but pretends to be dumb for the purpose of joke-making, because I think he likes making people smile (crowd-pleaser cough cough). Pretty good at math (yeah I think he might pretend (?) to hate it like YoUng PeoPLe but in reality he can do problems like a whiz, or maybe he straight up just flaunts it). Also good with phones; if you have a problem, he might know the answer. If SK doesn’t know what’s wrong with your device, go see HK, and if he doesn’t know, you’re actually out of luck. 

He’s pretty handsome (oooOOOhhh lol) and also well built, which makes a lot of people admire him at the least, and a lot of fangirls blowing kisses and heart eyes at him (sometimes he winks right back, and it makes a lotta people swoon) Does a whole bunch of sports, as well as those native to SK, like taekwondo. I imagine he likes to spend afternoons teaching and instructing smol children how to do (idk if fight/play is the right word…) the sport. Also he’s generally peppy and will help you with whatever if you’re a stranger, and if you’re a friend, you can still count on getting help from him, with a side dish of teasing: “Oh, you’re asking me?? How flattered I am” or something.

Going back to his somewhat untrustingness, I think all countries have that a little, because on the world stage they need to do what’s right for themselves, and sometimes that comes at the expense of others. I think SK would have tempered his wariness in modern times because of the peace (ish) and because there aren’t many /major/ wars, or at least not many that affect him. During the Korean War and the whole WWII episode with Japan and Korea, I think he’d be marginally surviving and be rough around the edges, and filled with hatred and revenge. He’s tempered those feelings too, but still has grudges. About his relationship with America, I think they’d be good friendos, I don’t know if SK didn’t trust him at first after the Korean peninsula split, but I think he slowly grew friendlier towards Alfred (if the untrusting situation is realistic). SK still feels guarded but sad about North and him (I like @alfredtalia‘s NK ask blog and her headcanons about the Koreas’ relationship) and usually takes action only to defend himself these days. 

And he’s really funny, and likes dad jokes. Somehow he finds them funny, to a lot of people’s dismay.

So basically I think South Korea’s a cool enthusiastic dude who would definitely be a great friend, but wasn’t always that way in history. He’s also a bit scarred by the most recent wars involving him. I’m a bit disappointed that he wasn’t in the anime, because that would mean more showtime/appearances and hopefully more attention and fans who write/draw/make stuff about him, but I understand the petition from South Koreans regarding his canon character, and I think it should be their decision about their country’s representation. I don’t really like his canon form either so I get why.

[masahikass]

okay so since i couldn’t resist, here’s some info about my random ie:go steven universe!au because i have no energy for online lessons :)

also i didn’t want to post about another au since @/primsbean is making so many posts about her ie:go madoka magica!au which i fUCKING LOVE OHMYGOD- but yeah, alternate universes are my favorite snacc. i have another one to talk about but first let’s say things about the SU one <3

under the cut because it’s LONG - and remember i’m not a native english so i might do some mistakes

okay so first of all, don’t blame me if there will be some events that don’t follow the plot (since i’m NOT remaking steven universe with ie charas!!!!! please keep this in mind) or events that Rebecca Sugar would have never inserted in her show. I respect everyone who worked at steven universe, and my intention is not to say their plot/story was bad, i’m just adding something that did never happen with any chara in the su series to make my au more original, that’s it. peace and love oN THE PLANET EARTH- okay that was the best su song hands down

also keep in mind gems don’t have “gemmic” names (if you know just a little of the su series, you should know all the gems are named after their gem, but i wont give that kind of names to the ie boys - or should i call them gems then? lol)

all the gems - for now - will be males too (as there werent any og male gems in steven universe besides steven, which is an hybrid though so...)

i will list each chara’s gem and ability after the general plot <3

so, the actual protags (though all the charas are!!! these are the two) are Tenma and Fey, who are around 5,000 years old - please if you don’t remember how the gems’ years worked go search it up, there are so many threads about that - and protect inazuma city (insert shooked face) from corrupted gems’ attacks. these attacks are not really frequent and they seem to deal with the situation, but one day they start increasing, being more frequent than usual and also the gems who attack are stronger and different from the previous ones. Fey starts making a theory about a possible new attempt of the homeworld gems (i still haven’t decided which charas will “represent” them, though, since this plot is a kind of season 1 we could say??) to start colonizing Earth via war, as they already did 3,500 years before the current events but failed, with the terrestrial gems rejecting them but also losing a lot of them - since some of them got shattered during the war and others escaped to travel to other planets to start colonizing them theirselves so they could live a new, pacific life. Tenma, at first, isn’t that sure about what Fey said, but as the corrupted gems’ attacks kept increasing he realized he could have been right. as they’re the only two gems who protect their city, they start thinking they should ask help to someone, trying to find more powerful gems. 

Fey suggests to search for a trio (whose name is still not 100% sure... i randomly thought about Prism Trio just because I couldn’t remake Crystal Gems ahahah I still don’t know) which protect old war ruins in a forgotten area which is actually near Inazuma City though - but still, only some gems know about it, for example Fey did researches but Tenma knew nothing. This trio will be formed by your local ie:go chaotic trio aka Shindou, Kirino and Kariya (well, if i don’t get any more ideas for the name, then Gay Trio will be alright), who are respectively 7,600, 8,000 and 7,100 years old and actually fought in the first war. They find them fighting against a corrupted fusion, and try to join them to finish it easily and fastly. As they actually give the trio a good help, they still get scolded by them because they went in an area they shouldn’t have been to. However, the trio is still thankful to them for their help, and when Fey tells them about the situation in Inazuma City Shindou replies telling him his theory might be right as he had heard about the increasing attacks, also because the ruins were more attacked than usual in that period. Tenma kindly asks them if they could give their help back, coming with him and Fey and trying to reject the attacks together, even though he thought they’d never agree. Kirino is absolutely okay with that and shows positivity towards Tenma’s idea, while Kariya isn’t that sure since all of them should get used to a new routine, different from the one they were used to in the last millenniums. Shindou, who was neutral at the beginning, proved Kirino right since that would have been the best way to know more about the new attacks, and finally convinces Kariya to join them.

As they get in TenFey’s temple (which is the only thing IDENTICAL to the original SU one, except for the statue in the original version which is absent now), they start organizing their rooms (you know, in the temple there was that one door who led to each gem’s personal room, so the trio starts get used to them), they also keep fighting against new species of corrupted gems who keep attacking the city.

One day, then, all the five gems get to another ruins area, further from the ones the trio used to fight in, and at a moment Tenma remains alone and encounters... bepreparedtocringeihadnoideassorry... Sasuke. Yes, I did a Lion reference using Tenma’s dog instead. Original af, congrats. BY THE WAY,, he understands this gIaNt DoG (ohmygod the lion sounded better,, damn me and my dumb ideas) is related to gems somehow, and when he gets back - since Sasuke disappears after some seconds - tells the others about it, but everyone gets it as a joke and doesnt trust him. In the next fight, though, Sasuke approaches the gems and gives them help (still idk how, gotta rewatch all the lion episodes 382679345 times to get more ideas), so they all understand Tenma was right.

Some days after that, while Tenma is playing with Sasuke (gOOD BOY,,,,, I MEAN GEM,,,,,,,,,,), the dog drags him into a portal/warp (did i spell it good omg my english gets worse every day...) - just as lion sometimes does in the og series, lol - and since this warp keeps being open for some seconds, the other four gems enter it as Tenma might be in trouble alone. They all discover Sasuke led Tenma to an unknown area, which i wanted to be a desert bUT THAT LOOKS A LOT LIKE THE OG SERIES HOLY SHI- so okay, let’s make it a normal land, where there’s a fight going on. They notice a gem fighting a corrupted one all alone, and this gem seems really in need of help so they try everything to save him (oMg SpOiLeRs ThE gEm Is A mALe ToO!!11!!!111!) as they see he doesn’t have any weapon and only fights with the things he finds around himself, such as common rocks. That gem is no one else (???) than Hikaru *cries in i needed to add him hes so baby* who tells the five gems he had never seen such a powerful corrupted gem before and that he was used to reject the previous attacks in that zone more easily, and when Tenma asks him if he wants to come with him and the others to the temple Hikaru accepts without any doubt. As he gets to the temple, the others ask him if he has any weapon, but he tells them he never had the strenght to “develop” one. Perhaps, his ability (the only i’ll reveal here in the plot!!) is really useful, as he can generate light from his gem and make people and other gems blind for a limited amount of time - which, at the beginning, is really short but always increasing. He also wants to practice it as he wants to control the limit of time (for example, blinding people/gems just for a minute even if he could do for ten). When he shows his ability to the other gems, they all get blind... besides Kariya and here the ship sails *coughs* n-nothing, who is actually immune to the light’s effect. Being the only one who doesnt get blind, he starts helping Hikaru to develop his weapon.

I still haven’t thought about the rest of the plot, but there are still three characters I wanted to add. In order: Kyousuke, as an hybrid whose backstory will be way different from Steven’s in the og series (as he wasn’t born an hybrid, neither one of his parents was a gem), then Minaho and Manabe who are gems from another planet (not Homeworld, though) that are usually fused all the time... but, still, I have to think abt a plot ahah

If you’ve got this far, well... congrats? I know this is really long oh damn-

Btw, before I go, here’s the gems’ weapons and abilities as I promised! <3

Tenma: bow and arrow, he can control the wind

Fey: he basically makes grow poisonous creepers from everywhere (kind of inspired from Lapis in the og series as she generated water and could control it), controls nature in general

Shindou: sword, his voice can reach really high pitches so if he screams he can destroy things (and, maybe, he could start shattering gems too... who knows)

Kirino: lance, has a really high speed

Kariya: basically can make strong claws grow from his hands (idk how to describe it holy fuck,,, i cant draw either, if i could i’d have showed u), his ability is telekinesis

Hikaru: well, i don’t wanna spoil his weapon as i’m gonna make another post asap... i already said what his ability was, btw. also!! i didnt mention it before, but his age is around 3000 y/o

Kyousuke: katana, he can read any person’s mind for ten minutes if he had contact with them, same goes with gems but he must touch their gem in order to read their mind (age, in human years: 17)

Minaho: guns, he can understand if someone or something interacted with someone/something else just by smelling it (sounds cringe ik,, btw his age is the same as Manabe’s, 6,700)

Manabe: since i had no more ideas, don’t blame me if this sounds Peridot-ish, but he can actually generate small but powerful robots he can control and fight with, his ability is controlling technology in general.

Another last thing... these nine characters are the same of the other au i mentioned (which is way more calm than this,,, i also have more info abt that, too), so look forward to that too <3

I’mma go now, bye!

[ralfstrashcan]

3x13 Reaction / Commentary

Yeah I'm aware, stop judging X___X

I feel the need to point this out. Apparently it's common practice for the Praetor to just, kill off their more troublesome charges. Interesting. But Jordan has a different work ethic which is a) apparently not usual for praetors and b) something at least Nick attributes to his past and not, idk, common decency. Just how savage is the Praetor exactly?? (Also let me add this to the list of things why 3x15 makes no sense at all.)

Okay, so they found another mundane dead by Heidi's hand...... why exactly don't they call the Shadowhunters? Aren't they obliged to? I mean?

True, but it sure as hell is her responsibility how she handles them. But we established already that she has a serious perception problem and always sees herself as the victim.

I mean, prime example, if she could have made that smooth exit through the vent where the werewolves couldn't follow, why didn't she just do that from the start instead of attacking Nick? Because she wants to cause trouble and not just “live her life in peace” as she's pretending to.

More like, he didn't have the guts to face Alec like that. Also does that mean he draped Izzy on the couch like that in that cliché sleeping pose with one hand under the head? At least he took off her boots like a sane person.

“I'm just drained.”

Haha it seems Alec isn't the only Lightwood sibling with a shitty sense of humor.

“I don't have the same preexisting condition.” “You mean my addiction?”

No, Izzy, he obviously means your fashion sense, keep up. Seriously, who wrote that stupid ass line of dialogue.

I found it pretty hilarious that Simon, Clary's literally oldest and bestest friend since kindergarten, feels the need to apologize to Izzy for taking up so much time with his Clary-reunion and blocking the path for her. The Clizzy Energy is Strong.

“Hmmmm hot hot hot Clary, please show me more.”

MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY HAHAHAHA PERFECT

Also, Morningstar.... didn't Val name his dumbass tanker ship in S1/S2 Morningstar? Guy really has it with name repetitions, first Jonathan 1 and 2, now Morningstar Ship and Morningstar Sword... I bet he named all his stuffed teddys Mr Snuffels 1, Mr Snuffels 2, Mr Snuffels 3.....

The way he delivers this line me might've as well said “Please cut out the emotional disgusting bullshit my skin is crawling already from this I can't take any more mushiness PLEASE GO AWAY.” Gotta love Alec.

MAGNUS RAGE PUNCHING THE KEYBOARD IS THE MOST RELATABLE THING I HAVE EVER SEEN

Magnus opening up about missing his magic MY HEART OH MY GOD

(Sidenote though: No wonder he got frustrated with the pretentious Shadowhunter Technology, I mean, look at it. There are only runes. Runes may be called runes, but they don't actually make up an alphabet. Why the heck is there a flexibility rune on the screen? It makes no sense.)

This whole scene (and Izzy's lipstick lol) is absolutely perfect. I love everything about it, especially Magnus and especially Izzy. I'd be really surprised if Magnus didn't find a way to get her that weird root thingy anyway, because he surely doesn't buy the “feeling a lot better now” line.

(Edit: Now thinking about it I realized two things, a) she probably didn't take him up on his offer to go to another warlock because she felt like that was unnecessarily rubbing in that he can't do it himself anymore* and b) with that line she probably meant she feels lighter already for sharing what happened and just <3<3<3<3<3)

*The only think that would have made this scene more perfect is if Izzy hadn't skimmed over his magic comment without acknowledging it in any way. Though with this thought in mind, that she rejected his offer to spare his feelings, I find myself placated.

Also I love how Magnus pretends he's going to look for pen and paper when really he's running straight to Alec to tell him all about this (and to prevent a repetition of 2x09 form happening.... and now I made myself sad again).

#effortless (Also reminds me of that post about fire message mechanics that I still owe a certain someone. Where is the time.)

HAHAHAHA

???????????? How do they know that? More importantly, does Alec know? Will he hear through the Shadow World grapevine??? So many questions.

I mean, I have sympathy for her. But like, she's too smart for me to buy that she genuinely can't see any other course of action. She just does this because it's the least effort for her, not because she's truly clueless what alternatives are there for here (aka not running around, killing mundanes, starting a fight with everyone). She just thrives on chaos.

Also “Wolves don't just attack without cause. Not in New York” ? Seems like all Institute except the NY one do a shit job since supposedly keeping peace between the Downworld factions is part of their responsibility. Yes, I am still salty about 3x15. (Also, if anyone's confused by this weird foreshadowing, I wrote notes for this reaction post while watching 3x13 when it first aired, but only got to finish it now after 3x19 aired and I can't keep my chronology-screwing bitterness to myself while finishing up the post. But mostly these are my thoughts from then.)

Yeah something tells me she's not gonna be totally uninvolved in that.

This and the fact that Russel wants to stop Bat from even leaving the Jade Wolf are the final proofs that all the werewolves actually live at the Jade Wolf and pile up in a giant snuggle pile in the kitchen at night. This is further cemented by the fact that Luke and Maia claim to have flats of their own but we never actually see them. Clearly they're both dirty liars that just wanted to mislead.

*late Jocelyn's late friend Eliot #rude #whatever

.......why the hell would Elias code that shit in Circle short hand? So other Circle members, who Jocelyn was hiding from, could easily open that super important safe? So smart! Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't Luke in the Circle as well? Shouldn't he be able to read that, too?

1) Eliot is such a loser and a showoff for ostentatiously writing that J in Jocelyn 2) His hint is seriously “Don't open with brute force.” Wtf kind of hint is that man are you even real.

I'm sorry, okay, but everytime I see / hear Bellicosi I think Maxi-Cosi XD

*glares at 3x15* Will I ever tire of raging about that episode? Unlikely.

Why.....? Since he didn't have any problem 100% blaming Raphael for everything Heidi did (not unjustified, but I'm just saying he's suddenly changed his mind). I mean, if he'd said she's dangerous to him and his family that would've been another matter.

These are all runes that I don't remember seeing on the Shadowhunters' Wiki Rune Page. Please tell me more.

Jace: “Clary, you've been going nonstop since you came back. You need to take a minute.”

lol if only Jace would implement the same advice himself.

“Wow I suddeny remember I had a life before I was 10.”

German Dubbing: Yeah, the ones Consul Penhallow categorically ignored. Honestly. Who dubbs this shit. Wtf.

Listen I love everything about this scene. (Fun Fact: In the German Dubbing she says vampire addiction, not venom addiction lol as if she was addicted to vampires XD)

Alec Lightwood, best brother of the year. Btw he's been holding that title since birth. I also don't think Alec would ever judge Izzy for her addiction / look at her as if she's weak, so the fact that she thinks that says a lot about how the addiction affected her self-image.

Too bad Alec forgets this for the next few episodes and acts like a total tool in that Clave Investigation Thing, smh.

Good to know.

Haha that was witty.

Oooooh why don't they ask another warlock then? For example one who's actually always the smartest person in the room?? Who's also willing to work on this??? Just a thought tho, don't let me interrupt the Maruke Bonding. No, you know what? I hate the shipname Maruke, it's shit, so I'm calling it Luryse as it should have been called. Then again, when am I even gonna talk about that pairing? We shall see.

“Outrageous, just because people around me keep turning up dead! It's ridiculous, really, that they'd think I could have something to do with that. It's as if they're not aware this is a TV show and supporting characters die because *Moriarty Voice* THAT'S WHAT PEOPLE DO!”

“That what the kids call it these days when they get kicked out on their ass?” She literally says “From one exiled to another” so she clearly realized he's full of shit.

“And that's why in two episodes Imma get myself arrested by behaving like a dumbass and then chill in prison as if it's my greatest accomplishment.” Honestly Luke, so many No-s. I can't even.

“Wow I can't believe I have to see this Luryse bs up close.” Hah, now I used the right shipname and can move the f on from bashing that pairing. Sorry about that. I'm sleep deprived. That always makes me extra salty.

“When you're alpha you need to make the pack your first priority. Your personal life needs to take a back seat. And mine never did.” I applaud Luke for admitting he was a shit alpha because he didn't proritize the pack. Hindsight is 20/20.

Wow Luke so helpful <3<3<3 Just like I know and love you.

I also love how nobody questions that Heidi bit that mundane and then chilledly made a phone call at the scene of her Accords-violating crime. How frakking convenient.

But their runes aren't on the same side. Sloppy work. Also, if the illustrator obviouly takes artistic liberties, then the rune missing on the second pic doesn't have to mean anything. Maybe they just forgot to draw it. Then again this isn't even the most flimsy conclusion-making I've wittnessed on this show so I'll let it slide.

lol Jace and Jonathan are basically playing tug of war with Clary: Jonathan burning himself, Jace activating her healing rune XD

Ooooh brainless S1 Clary, how I have not missed you. Srsly now? Carve it out? That didn't work for Simon so why should it now? lol she should ask the seelie queen if she has some handy floor mosaic thingy in her courtyard to help with that.

In his defense, he moved.

It's not gonna work is what it is. Srsly how dumb are they? Why the hell does she think something so powerful can just be carved out?? Wtf.

Woooow they're using a rune removing device, color me impressed. I really thought they'd just put a scalpel to it. So, at least points for trying.

Uuuuh get some morphin, try again. I mean. But anyway.

*break up

......didn't she just break up with him because pack reasons? Where is that not a Shadow World Reason? Please explain. (Also choosing an unflattering screen cap of Simon because he annoys me? Absolutely. I am petty like that.) The easy way Simon accepts their break up really makes me wonder. If Maia hadn't said anything, would he have broken up with her? Since apparently things “changed” and they could “both” “feel” it. Honestly. He literally calls her his girlfriend at the start of the scene as if to draw attention to how ridiculous this is.

You know what, I don't even have the energy to rage about this. Their relationship was so great, they were so supportive of each other, they had great chemistry, great communication, they always stood by each other. And just because Sizzy has to be endgame there were suddenly weird-ass tension between them for no real reason – none that 3A Saia wouldn't have worked through like pros anyway – just so this break up wouldn't come out of absolutely nowhere. It's shit treatment of both their characters and their relationship and I'm just so exasperated with it all. (Also not the way to endear me to Sizzy. But at this point I feel like a broken record.)

Discount? It was free. Which I'm still finding super hard to believe by the way, that a werewolf establishment would just give out free food to vampires who don't even work there. But what do I know, right, I mean it's not like they just mentioned a few minutes ago how werewolves and vampires hate each other? Right?? Hahaha.

Wow. This actually takes the time to highlight that this break up wasn't as amicable as Simon thought. Maybe he thought that they were breaking up for human reasons, but Maia clearly feels she threw her relationship away for the pack and it's hard for her. And Simon's tirade wasn't really encouraging her to let him know that. I really appreciate that detail.

Other things I want to say: 1) I didn't like that Maia just flat out broke up with him. She should have informed him that she was going to step up for the pack and would have to prioritize that over their relationship and then leave it up to him if he wants to put up with that or not. By breaking up she made the choice for him. Her course of action is ic, I'm not critizising that, but from like, a personal stand point I don't like it. 2) Foreshadowing: Since her whole pack gets slaughtered, if that would have been the only reason to break up with Simon she coulda just gotten back together with him lol. Haha sorry I'm trash. I know.

Wow he's really dumb. He knows Heidi's brand of crazy and still he doesn't realize this was a trap. He said himself that Heidi must have done something for the Preator to be after her, and when the Praetor tells him she's been leaving copses left and right he...... takes this as his cue to ally himself with Heidi??? Wtf?????? Does he not believe what Jordan said? Again, he suspected something like that himself and since the Praetor are playing at being the Downworlder Police they wouldn't just make something like that up with no proof. The heck. I don't get you, Boss Vampire Guy.

Also, thumbs down for the Praetor, if they'd just told them their source was Heidi herself (on the phone) this could have been prevented. But, ugh. With how things are I can at least kinda buy that no working communication between vampire clan and Praetor exists.

Still, if the Praetor wants to be accepted as some kind of Shadow World Institution they should really work on their manners.

.................................................

I I don-- I can't. *sigh* I can't believe I just had to watch this with my own two eyes. Have they not been trained for a case like this? A fellow shadowhunter injured in the field? That activating the healing rune should be the first thing you do? Before lovingly prying information from the dying person?? I mean, if that's not Plot Convenience then I don't know what is. Sure, he needs to give them a snippet of info, but not too much. But please, please, couldn't writers have found a way for this that didn't make them look like the stupidest of idiots in the entire frikkin world?! Wtf. WTF. I can't believe it.

Uuuuuuh how did she know how to turn those things if all she had to work with was Don't use brute force?? Do I have to understand that?

“You brought coffee, after all.”

Look she's so ashamed she even turned away from the screen haha. Also it's so refreshing to see grown ass people approach a relationship like idiotic teens. (Yeah, that was sarcastic.)

“And right now I wanna do you.” Hahahaha sorry, too good to pass up, you can bet your ass imma turn this into a dumb comic XD

“I love you, Clary. And I'll love you until I die. And if there's a life after this I'll love you then, too.”

Okay, I wanted to roll my eyes at their love confession, but what Jace said was actually really sweet <3

Alec: All our people were accounted for at the time of the murder. Izzy: We think it was a Clave hit.

Oh couldn't have been one of the millions of Shadowhunters from another Institute? No, I'm sure Alec checked that on their neat little Shadowhunter Intranet, that all other Shadowhunters all over the workd were accounted for as well. Honestly.

Also, Maryse says “By the angel,” but in the German Dubbing she says “What the angel” which makes it seem as if Shadowhunters curse by replacing dirty words with “angel” and just... what the angel XD

Why the hell are they all so obsessed with Latin? Ugh. Exhausting hobby.

Btw lol, please rewatch that scene, the background music is weirdly reminiscent of the Stranger Things Theme hahahaha. (Also omg I'm peeking into the German dubbing and it doesn't even make SENSE hahaha what the shit.)

LOL that's like the soulmate trope but in painful XD basically the creepy incest edition XD But honestly can we appreciate what a nice hand Jonathan has with a knife and with his left hand?? Prodigy.

This is it, the final proof that they actually all live at the Jade Wolf hahahha.

...................................? Why the f is she happy to see Jordan? Last time they saw each other she clearly stated she hated him?? Do I need to understand?? Oh right. In the books Maia and Jordan get back together. Right. Stupid, why am I even surprised by this??

Wtf isn't he the clan leader? Why the hell is he acting so submissively to Heidi all of a sudden? Literally half a day ago he threw her out of his clan, knowing his place. And now he's like a puppet on her strings. Wtf. But I guess that happens when you treat characters as plot devices. They get inconsistent even if they only have two scenes. *sigh*

Awwww would you look at that, werewolves and vampires fighting with fists like mundanes. (Okay some of them had like, daggers, but where are the fangs and the claws? Honestly.)

Okay I did her injustice in my trailer reaction since this is a vamp and a legitimate fight situation.

Wow that actually surprised me. But Jordan also dies in the books so, oops. Just didn't think they'd skip the getting together.

WOW that really surprised me. I thought Maia would challenge him and they'd have an epic fight to the death or something. (Also wtf Griffin guy, what's with that creeper face.)

To be honest I find it hard to believe that Maia acts like this. Scared out of her mind, yeah sure. But she acts helpless, and she's never been that. When she got that pipe thing I thought she'd use it as a stake. Using it to block the door is smart, too, but why didn't she get another to have a stake? Her whole posture, uselessly hangig over Jordan screams damsel in distress and I don't like it at all.

Edit: I had certain fears how this plotline would be developed in 3x14 which thankfully didn't come true, but my conflicted opinion on this ending scene remains.

Anyway let’s take a moment and appreciate Maia’s Killer Boots.

BTW watched the 3x14 trailer and just.... what. Why the f would Magnus ask Lorenzo of all people for help? He can't be trusted. As if he wouldn't use that opportunity to break Magnus even further! WTF! Where's Catarina? Oh, let me guess, another Drunk Doctor Conference *epic eyeroll*

[dork-empress]

So, I’ve talked a bit about what I would do if I could make my own Star Trek Series but last night I was talking with my Dad about what I’d do if I was in charge of the Reboot Series, aka what would become Discovery.

I’m going off the assumption that A) studios want it to be in the reboot universe, B) I have no CONTROL over the movie reboots C) The studio will want this new series to have strong ties to the reboot movies ‘cause that’s their main franchise blah blah blah. 

Essentially, this is me just straight-up re-doing Discovery, and re-naming everything. 

So, Here is Star Trek: Spirit

We start with our premise: If you’ve seen Star Trek The Movie you are aware that Romulans came from the future and killed Kirk’s father and destroyed Vulcan, leaving few Vulcans left. 

So here’s our series, 50 years AFTER the events of the movies (’cause its been about 50 years since the original series aired). Things between Starfleet and the Romulans are...tense. Like, Present-Day Romulus wasn’t really involved with the destruction of Vulcan, as far as anyone knows, but...the ship of future-romulans were sitting around for like, 20 years, and no one knows what they were doing. Many suspect that they took refuge with their own people, and possibly even passed along future tech to the present-day Romulans. 

Recently there’s been even more stirrings, rumors that the Romulans are preparing for war. Star Fleet Intelligence, decides to take action, so they start to organize a spy mission.

The official position is that the Star Ship USS Vigilance is assigned to patrol the neutral zone, and put in place to study any phenomena that happens in neutral space. 

Secretly, though, the Vigilance is a home base for a small ship, bigger than a shuttle but smaller than a battle ship, the spy ship, Blackbird Class, USS Spirit. The true wonder of the Spirit: It’s armed with starfleet’s first cloaking device.

(yeah I know the Defiant had a cloaking device, but the Romulans knew about it and also that series is not in the reboot.)

(Yes the ship is named for double meaning of Spirit like, confidence and attitude and then also like a ghost in that its invisible)

Lets talk characters. I’m actually inclined to use a lot of Discovery’s characters, but....modified.

For instance, instead of Michael Burnham, our main character played by Sonequa Martin Green is T’Shala Uhura. Yup, that Uhura. T’Shala is the daughter of Spock and Uhura (Even if you don’t like the pairing, consider: Guest Star Nichelle Nichols). The name T’Shala is a vulcanization of the Swahili name Tishala which means “One who is Strong Willed” and lets face it, that has to fit any kid of Uhura and Spock. 

T’Shala is 1/4 Vulcan, making her one of the few Vulcans left in Star Fleet, as most are focused on trying to rebuild their community (Spock for one has retired, trying to help out) T’Shala herself has never seen Vulcan, and has pretty well separated herself from a lot of the ideas of emotionless-ness. Without that logical control, though, she’s susceptible to Vulcan bouts of emotional instability. She does look somewhat Vulcan, which allows her to pass as Romulan, a useful skill when commanding the Spirit. Her official position is the first officer of the Vigilance, but she’s really the commander of the Spirit. 

Then we have the rest of the crew, that actually, surprisingly, I’m going to keep close to the crew of Discovery. Maybe the actors could switch around, maybe they wouldn’t, but with some minor reshuffling I think it could work. 

Captain Lorca, for instance, can still be Captain, just of the Vigilance this time. He’s a battle-worn veteran who’s suspicious as hell of the Romulans, quick to draw, BUT he is fiercely protective of his crew. He will put himself on the line for the lowliest ensign, and in fact, that’s often what gets him most in trouble with Star Fleet, his unwilling-ness to keep distance with his crew. The way Discovery presents his photosensitivity is...odd, to me, too. Just with his whole space-eyes thing. I recommend he have like, space wheelchair. Could use prosthetics sometimes, but I have this vivid scene in my head of T’Shala being shown around the Vigilance and asking “Where’s the Captain’s Chair?” and then Lorca hovers in. 

Saru is demoted out of starfleet and becomes the Vigilance’s official Ambassador, a civilian, and terrified of conflict, is well suited to Diplomacy. He and Lorca get in a lot of debates about Federation procedure. As a general rule, he doesn’t like even the existence of the Spirit, but accepts it as a part of Star Fleet’s decision. 

Stamets and Dr. Culber can stay pretty much as they are except Culber is more of a main character, please, and has his own unique relationships with people other than Stamets. Stamets also somewhat doubles as science officer. At some point, they encounter a dangerous space alien creature that Stamets will adopt as a pet, driving Culber up the wall. Culber looks after it anyways because he loves his BF and doesn’t want to hurt anyone. 

LANDRY IS STILL ALIVE please. I think I want to keep her as Security officer/Tactical Officer, hard as nails and Lorca’s right hand. But don’t worry, we’re not getting rid of...

Ash Tyler. He was a prisoner of the Romulans for years, and maybe gets rescued by T’Shala herself, and brought back. He’s a skilled pilot, or something, and often will pilot the Spirit on its missions, as he’s the one most familiar with Romulan space, tactics, and culture from his time as prisoner. 

Then Tilly, of course. Tilly is an Ensign who works in Engineering under Stamets, but often times, she is trusted to be the engineer for the Spirit, and so will often accompany T’Shala on her missions. They become fast friends. She’s also explicitly neuroatypical, I don’t know in what sense, but....she is. 

Now lets talk original characters. Antagonist characters. The Romulans. 

So we’re gonna say right off the bat that the weird baldness? and lines on their face? That is an illness that the future ship of Romulans contracted from their time travel incident. Most Romulans look like Vulcans, pretty much. We....we can modify their shoulder pad armor, though....like. That we can do. 

Except for one. One single Romulan...who left the Future Romulan ship, because he found love on Romulus. Now, his wife is the Praetor (Czar, essentially) he has all this knowledge of the future and a HATRED of Starfleet...and anyone related to Spock. (cue dramatic music) I wanna say his name is....Saelum. yes, pronounced like Salem. He starts the Tal Shiar (Romulan spy group that kinda runs things and everyone’s afraid of it) His wife is Praetor Vis. 

Then there’s the captain of the Warbird Excias, Versa. The Excias patrols the Romulan side of the border, and is often paired up with the Vigilance. She’s loyal to the Empire, of course, but she does not want a war with Starfleet. Suspicious, but not violent. She at some point makes friends with an interesting Romulan woman, Umbra, who happens to be T’Shara undercover. T’Shara has to be careful to avoid her whenever Versa works with Vigilance.

Storylines include:

Various phenomena that occurs in the neutral zone that Vigilance has to investigate. 

Learning about Romulan culture.

At some point we need a straight up parody of “The Hunt for Red October” (Movie/Book about a Russian Defector) 

Some more things about the similarities/differences between Vulcans and Romulans

Possibility of reunification between Romulans and Vulcans???

Civil War breaks out on Romulus. T’Shala wants to help one side, Lorca and Saru are vehemently against it

Section 31 (Starfleet’s not-so-moral secret agency) interferes with Romulus, Vigilance tries to stop them. 

Space whales. I just like space whales. 

Spirit gets trapped without Warp power deep in Romulan space. 

Peace and love in the galaxy. I dunno i just want more bullet points. 

Lots of diplomacy and politics (*cough*andallusionstoUSrelationswithRussia*cough*)

Friendship. 

Other:

BRING BACK THE COLOR CODED UNIFORMS!! NONE OF THIS METALLIC SHIT!! GOLD, RED, BLUE, DONE. JUST. YOU CAN MAKE THEM LOOK COOL BUT. COME ON. 

[janeaustentextposts]

Hello, I know this isn't exactly austen related but you're the only one I can think of who might be able to clarify this for me. I was wondering how exactly cadet branches of houses are formed? I mean I know It comes from a yonger son and so on but what makes him not take his ancestors name/house and instead found a new one? Like the yorks that came from the plantagenets for example? thank you so much for all the questions you answer here, It makes my history nerd heart very happy

Oh boy, genealogy and the Wars of the Roses are not in my wheelhouse, but I’ll paraphrase Wikipedia to the best of my abilities try.

As best as I can tell, the reason why a younger son wouldn’t just take the family name and establish himself elsewhere is just that there’s no real getting away from a powerful dynasty, and it’s probably more advantageous to be connected with the main family than to try and strike out on one’s own.Cadet branches were not expected to submit to ancestral duties in quite the same way as senior heirs, so they could enter into alliances and lines of business which perhaps would have been considered beneath the main family line, though they could then bring in useful wealth and connections, and establish themselves as men of importance in their own rights, to some extent, though they would always be somewhat inferior to the main line with the best ancestral titles and properties.For example, in my own family I can trace a line back to the Howard family of England, but my connections are only to the Carlisle branch of the family, which is itself a cadet branch, alongside other such branches–the Effingham Howards, the Suffolk Howards, and the Penrith Howards. (Also my exact connection is nothing very noble or even definitively provable–my great-great grandmother was a servant at Castle Howard who bore her employer’s illegitimate child.) These families are certainly wealthy and have their own standing, peppered with earls and barons, but the head of the family as a whole is still the Duke of Norfolk, highest in rank and likely holding the best properties traditionally gifted to the holder upon the creation of the title.As to the Plantagenets…are you at all fond of the names Henry and Edward? You won’t be by the time I’m finished.

In the power-struggle between the houses of York and Lancaster, the problem was that York and Lancaster were both cadet-branches of the House of Plantagenet, and could not (or would not) agree which of them had a greater claim to the English (or, by then, mostly English) throne. The family had its roots in France, (we’ll try to ignore this because it’s less important as time goes on and the real beef is over England,) and eventually established themselves as kings of England, with some apparent discord between historians as to whether Henry I is the first English Plantagenet king or whether it’s actually Henry II via Henry I’s daughter Empress Matilda or even Henry III; and they didn’t actually really call themselves Plantagenets, exactly, because they were also “Angevins” with holdings in France but it’s hard to draw a line between where they stop being Angevins and start being Plantagenets with the shifts in what land was held in France being lost over the years and alternative political changes happening in England at the same time.

Henry II has a younger brother, Geoffrey, and French inheritance customs are different back then so it’s assumed Henry will take over the English holdings belonging to his mother Empress Matilda and maternal grandfather Henry I of England, while his brother Geoff will take over the paternal claims to French lands, dividing up the ‘kingdom’ holdings of the family. Anyway, with people being busy ruling on different sides of the Channel and all that, when Henry I died, Matilda’s cousin Stephen (who was also mostly French but again the lines between French and English are super-murky at this point with all the inter-marrying and having all these French and English holdings,) seized the English throne, and Matilda hears about this over in France while she’s dealing with the French side of the family’s stuff and was like oh shit that’s a problem.

So England ultimately falls into civil war because a lot of powerful people all over the British Isles and France are now giving Stephen some obvious side-eye like dude, seriously? Also if there’s a power-vacuum EVERYBODY IS GONNA PILE IN AND TRY TO GRAB A PIECE OF THAT SWEET, SWEET FEUDAL TERRITORY; so if it’s good enough for Stephen to step up and say “I’m having this throne” what more encouragement do other power-hungry entitled men need to try the same trick?

This is also why a cadet branch wouldn’t just go off an establish its own dynasty–you need to control vast swaths of land to have that kind of power, which is why all of this in-fighting happens. To these people it makes more sense to fight their own relatives for control of the biggest and richest bits of property than to try and go off and establish their own rule over smaller and shittier bits of property. After all, what’s the point of having something if someone else has something better? Mix ambitious power-grabs with a staggeringly heady sense of God-given bloodline-based entitlement, and hey presto you’ve got civil wars happening because when these royal relatives aren’t marrying each other, they’re killing each other. There are some peasant rebellions and insurrection-type movements happening at important points throughout this history, particularly when we get the Magna Carta with King John and some commoner uprisings in the rule of Richard II which were a public-relations nightmare I tell you what; but ultimately the driving force of most of the strife is this one mega-batshit extended family unit who can’t agree.All these minor kingdoms and duchys and whatever else they had in France which was obviously not THE France we know as a whole collective country today were having armed conflicts over territory, themselves, so basically there’s a whole lotta fighting going on. Anyway, eventually Steve the Ultimate Black Sheep of the Family and Matilda’s son Henry agree to just let Stephen be king until he dies, and then Henry can take over, promise! Which happens shortly thereafter, luckily, and Henry II is now King of England.He is married to Eleanor of Aquitaine, who I have definitely already heard of, and she is fierce as fuck, rich as fuck, was the Queen of France for fifteen years, got that annulled because the King needed a son, not daughters (high-fiving Henry VIII in the afterlife, honestly,) and so she then married Henry II and became Queen of England because why not? Went on to have eight kids, including five sons because fuck you Louis VI. And spent long stretches of time in prison because schemes galore. (Where is her dramatized biopic miniseries, BBC?) Three of those sons went on to be kings, including Richard the Lionheart, who Disney interpreted rather literally in their version of Robin Hood.

He was ultimately followed onto the throne by his unruly brother John, and the lack of direct heirs began the crumbling of the Angevin empire. John loses a bunch of lands in France, but signs the Magna Carta in England, so he’s a pretty mixed bag as monarchs go, but undoubtedly important, history-wise.

John’s son Henry III refocused on power in England, though he did try to gain back some of the French lands, without much success. There was no more English messing about with Crusades, though Henry III was very shitty to Jewish people in his kingdom, so fuck Henry III, moving on.

His son was Edward I, aka Edward Longshanks, which I only know because I was am a hopeless nerd who loved playing Age of Empires II back in the day and the William Wallace campaign is the learning campaign you gotta play through and Longshanks is the antagonist, so…he…fought the Scots. That’s all I know. Something something they may take oor lives but they’ll never take oor frrreedom! I am flying blind here, can you tell? I just wanted to gather berries and build my castles in peace, okay? It was Sim City for history nerds.

His kid Edward II takes over pounding on the Scots, (and was probably also pounding Piers Gaveston, if you know what I mean. God bless.) He actually had a lil’ family tiff with a branch of the family which was also called the House of Lancaster, but it was a different House of Lancaster which ultimately caused the problems later on down the line with the House of York, so we’ll ignore this House of Lancaster.

I dunno what Edward III did exactly but his accomplishments and failings are largely irrelevant for my purposes of trying to determine what happened with the Plantagenets, so he passed on the crown to his grandson Richard II, who was the son of Edward, the Black Prince, who was played by James Purefoy in the totally factual and in no way fanciful documentary A Knight’s Tale.

(…take five, everybody. We’ll pick this up once we have our breath back.)

So Richard II became king when he was ten years old, and this is where shit starts getting out of hand. His uncle, John of Gaunt, (himself a son of Eddie #3,) holds a lot of power. While most nobles preferred Richard to rule with a series of councils, rather than a regency under the legal control of his uncle, John still had a lot of influence over the young king. Richard II’s rule was riddled with rebellions and crises, and ultimately it seemed to be felt by some that he was a weak and tyrannical young king, leading his cousin Henry Bolingbroke, son of John of Gaunt, to overthrow Richard and place himself on the throne as Henry IV. Bolingbroke would not have been Richard’s heir–that was Richard’s first cousin twice removed, Edmund Mortimer–but Henry argued that that was a claim through Edmund’s grandmother, whereas his claim was through male descendants. Edmund, understandably, was super-pissed about this development and spent the rest of his life plotting and rebelling against Henry and Henry’s son…Henry V.

His son, Henry (…wait for it…) VI, was the king in whose rule conflict would break out which would later be known as the real starting-point for the actual Wars of the Roses. (There’s more fuckery involving wars over territory in France but I am not going back over all that so help me God. All these dudes just need to maybe admit that they are not owed kingdoms by grace of who their parents or grandparents or second-cousins-twice-removed were.)

Edward IV (Yorkist,) having inherited Edmund Mortimer’s indignant rage, kicked Henry VI’s ass and took over the English throne while Philippa Gregory went positively giddy with excitement and I tried not to wince at this casting:

His twelve year-old son reigns for 86 days as Edward V, then enter everybody’s favourite propaganda chew-toy: RICKY THE THIIIIIRD! [blasts airhorn]

Endlessly maligned Good Egg with gentle ways and good bone-structure or cold-blooded incestuous vicious child-killer with a visible disability because back then they believed that kind of thing was a Sign from God that He hated that person for a reason. Depends on who you ask.

Anyway, Richard III was definitely the last of the Plantagenets and he was killed by Henry Tudor, who then took the throne of England as Henry VII and if you can guess what royal dynasty he founded, you get zero points.

So it was John of Gaunt’s legitimate male descendants who would form the House of Lancaster which began causing problems when his son Henry Bolingbroke/Henry IV overthrew Richard II and usurped Edmund Mortimer, the heir apparent. The House of York that would fight them were the descendants of Edward III’s second and fourth sons, in different lines. I don’t fully understand what it all means, exactly, but clearly there’s a lot of arguing going on about family trees and which bits of it are technically better or make a blood-tie to a common ancestral king stronger or weaker than someone else’s blood-tie. As the Yorkists had connections to TWO sons of Edward III, well, clearly that counts for something. Mostly a worrying amount of inbreeding among nobles, if you ask me. Which you did. And I’ll bet you’re sorry you asked, now! :)

[pigeonacademic]

babyfairy here again. just wanted to say i dislike all of the songs in your ratty ass playlist. this is the kind of playlist a school shooter listens to before going in for the kill. ps. you're still ugly as fuck. suck my black ass

@diaroon @saiyanhero

At least I have a playlist! What does your blog have? Eh, nothing except a loli girl theme with a Mew gif. Mew would be ashamed to be associated with you!

Also, I don’t know about you but its not a school shooter playlist. In fact, YOU seem the type to shoot up a school, angry little kid who’s soooo easily offended and CLAIMS that everyone who isn’t black/doesn’t agree with you is racist and you DID advocate for the death of white people in some of your posts. (old ones, but you still hold that mindset.) Seems to me that you’d pick up a gun and shoot up the nearest school just for having white kids. I mean, if you’re willing to go through all this bullshit to continue harassing me, what else are you capable of?As for the songs there, let’s take a looksy:

-Your Heart Will Lead You Home, by Kenny Loggins.

Wow..so a song about missing your friends and how they’ll still be there for you is a school shooter song? I mean you don’t have any friends, so of course you’d think it’s evil because nobody wants to be friends with a racist hypocrite.

-Not One Of Us, from the Lion King 2

Haven’t you seen any of the Lion King movies? They’re sort of a big thing? Come on don’t tell me you hate Disney, lol. How is a bunch of animals singing about someone who betrayed them a school shooter song? I mean, it sort of applies to you seeing as you’re deceptive, disgraceful, shameful and pure evil. People want you to leave them alone, and nobody wants you to come back here because of that. The only difference between you and and the lion they were singing about, at least he made an effort to right his wrongs.

-River Flows In You

Only you would thing a piano song is a school shooting song. Is it because YOU fantasize about shooting up a white school with pretty music playing? Gee whiz girl, get your shit together.

-My Metal Boy

Oh look, another song you think is evil because you never had anyone who cared about you, so you automatically hate it. Only you would hate a song about a loving parent taking care of their child. Then again it’s no surprise. Either you were summoned or hatched.

-Holding Out For A Hero

Can you reach any further??

-Mohombi Maraca

Don’t break your back with that reach, holy shit. 

-Perfect Two

Aw, another song you hate because nobody loves a racist hypocrite :) Stop being racist and a hypocrite and you might find a guy or girl who won’t run away from you. 

-Fallen in Love

Are you seeing a pattern here, because I am! Jealous bitch is jealous because nobody loves her because of her ratty ass attitude, so now she thinks everything is school-shooter songs and evil because it doesn’t apply to her. Pathetic. 

-You’re so True

Seriously? I mean, my playlist is something a normal person would have and yet you would associate it with killing. Why?? Are you that deranged?? You think everything that isn’t Beyonce is evil?? (For the record she IS a Beyonce fan)

-Let me Out

Taken from a werewolf movie, because I liked it. Turns out the girl who THOUGHT she was prettier than the other and got jealous that the main character had a boyfriend was the werewolf. 

-House That Built Me, by Miranda Lambert

A song about homesickness, and you associate something with FEELINGS with murder. You foul reptilian.

-This is WarI don't see how this is a school shooter song, its about war, sure, but nothing about this is school-shooter. Did you even listen to any of these songs?

-In Noctem

So you hate sleepy chorus music, good to know. I bet you hate Harry Potter too.

-MountainsThis makes me think of afternoon sunlight filtering through a hiking trail as a group of friends walk down it, talking with each other and enjoying each other's company and taking pictures of nature. Something you can't relate to.

-Memories, by TiNoXBeatzSo, this is the music I use to write sad scenes for my stories and poems, since I associate this with one of the sadder moments in my life, and it's very peaceful.

-I'm still HereTreasure Planet, song about a boy who's dad walks out on him and his mom and he is sick of other people telling him what to be even though they never change.

-Double TroubleHarry Potter song that I think I heard or read somewhere else in terms of the lyrics.

-The Mechanical GirlTell me how a story/song about a king who orders a tinker and his creation to his castle, decides he wants to marry the robot, throw the tinker out, marry the robot who turns into a war machine to be able to escape and go back to her creator bad?

-Santa Monica dreamWhenever I hear of this, I think of my family back home and the things we used to together, like at Nanny's house we'd go outside and play football, go see the animals, catch up on relatives who visit from so far away, practically half the family shows up to see her every time because she lives a-ways away from everyone else.

-Back on TrackThis is my drawing inspiration music, lol, and also the exercise music for the hamster.

-Stereo MadnessAlso drawing inspiration music.

-Monsters by Mark ProvartTaken from one of my favorite scenes in the Scooby Doo 2 movie

-Piper's Dancing musicI don't remember the original title of it, but this music is peaceful at first, then it gets to where you can dance to it! I used to dance to this back at our old house, and my grandparents love it.

-Spirit of the HawkThis was a song I found back in tenth grade that I liked, and I remember when playing it on the Chromebook while waiting for the bus, this group starts dancing to it, and it's how I met one of my friends, so even though I don't like it as much now, it reminds me of when I met him.

-Mad WorldI like the guy who sings this, his voice is soothing even if the song is sad.

-Boats and BirdsThis one means a lot to me, because the singer sounds like my mother. I don't get to see my mom as much anymore, and when I was younger she used to sing to me all the time and I really miss that. We used to live in the country, just me and her while Dad was off driving cross-country to make deliveries for the company he worked at, and we spent our summer at this one beautiful house outside in the backyard or on the porch, and as I'd paint or play with one of the cats, she'd sing. She also sang whenever I was having trouble sleeping, so whenever I can't sleep, I put this on to help.

-Get off of my BackThis is my song that gets me going, ESPECIALLY when dealing with people like you. So take the song's advice and get off of my back.

-Rosemary's BabyIt's from a horror movie, one that I am pretty sure explains your origins. I actually like Rosemary's singing, since its soothing.

-Battle in the SkiesI'm into steampunk and dieselpunk, and it is also drawing and writing inspiration music.

-Faceoff theme (the show, not the movie)I feel like more of a model when I have this playing while I try on clothing, and it gets me feeling determined, not to mention it helps when sketching out character designs.

-Great SpainThis song is something you can really dance to and the voices sound really pleasant even if I don't understand what they're saying. Alice likes this music too!

-Great JapanI like the vocals and the instrumentals, and I use this as workout music.

-Hellsing music box themeI don't like this as much as I used to, but I really like music boxes so its why I keep it until I can find something better to replace the theme with.

-PanzerkampfSabaton has some of the best history related songs. It gets the heart thumping when you have it loud, and I have a fond memory of this: at school, we had Chromebooks that shut off music that you're playing but they resume it as soon as you open it again. I didn't know this before I opened it and the music BLARED through the classroom. I found another Sabaton fan that way! (Also, my history teacher got introduced to the music and he plays it in his classrooms for other students during free time.)

-What I nap toHocus Pocus was a good movie, then I found this version of it that I find soothing.

-Circle BackwardsThis song makes me feel better whenever I think about home and the schools I left. After I listen to it I feel a lot better.

-Revamped MozartI like remixes of classical songs, and its really fitting for our pets when they get to play with each other. Scratch hops around on the cats, Suzie jumps everywhere, Alice leaps onto things to escape Scratch, Randal runs, Baby swats at Suzie and Oreo just plays in her cage. If I ever video their antics I am putting this as the background music.

-Short HairIts from that one scene in Mulan where she disguises herself as a man. This song conveys so much emotion for that scene, and not a word had to be spoken.

-Airship PiratesUsed as writing inspiration, and I think its pretty good for an Abney Park song. Listening to it right before I make a trip to the library makes me feel like I'm on a mission.

-I need some sleepThis song is self explanatory, aka my Insomnia Song.

-Europa GlobusHoly fucking shit if you don't own a pair of earbuds get some right now and plug it in to listen to this on full volume and make sure you're sitting down because this is one of the fucking best songs and it gives you chills and I swear you can see every battle and event flash right before your eyes like some epic movie and it makes you tremble and shiver its like a brain massage and the best part is if you're not very imaginative there's a youtube video that simulates it and also this is good workout music and I use it when exercising and I'm sure your history teacher will fucking love this

-Burn it DownSong about guys who enact revenge on a boss because of unfair working conditions, but they kill everyone instead because they didn't think to check the building's layouts first.

-Big green tractorThis brings back memories of one of the houses we used to live at, and this song came out around the time I went to my first school dance where they played this. My date and I had a lot of fun dancing, and the sore feet later was so worth it.

-I love to laughThis song also cheers me up and come on how can you listen to this and NOT smile? Maybe if you're a souless reptilian person, but if the lyrics don't get you then the laughter will!

-Benny Hills themeWhen I'm bored I put this on and watch random youtube videos, and for most of the prank fails or parkour fails it automatically makes them funnier. Reading your comments with this playing makes it much more funnier too!

-Touch the skyI really like Brave and this is also writing inspiration

-I love rock and rollIn one of my stories, an important scene takes place at this club that plays a lot of rock and roll, and currently I am at the part where the guy drags his really mousy friend to her crush so she can talk to her. This music helps me envision what the club is like.

-Accidentally in loveFond memories of this song, it cheers me up, puts me in the mood to draw and write romantic things and this is what plays in my head whenever I think about one of my Hellsing pairings.

-Jeeper Creeper's whistleNot really a song, but I use it anyways because I can

-Lone DiggerOh man I LOVE this one! This is the song that got me into electro swing, and the video that goes with it is a little strange, kind of like if Zootopia was geared towards an adult crowd. Stripper Gazelle and bloody fight aside, this song is good. I was dancing to this a few months ago, then I cracked my ankle on the organ chair.

-Tia's Monster remixDrawing inspiration and this is going to be a part of a animation I want to do

-If you're gonna play in TexasSong that my dad used to play whenever he took me somewhere. Emotional attachement, you know?

-Pumped up kicksThe only song about a school shooting, I didn't even realize it was until after I just googled it to see who wrote it.

One song out of how many is 'school shooter' songs?? Did you even listen to all of the songs, or did you just skip through until you found Pumped up kicks?

By the way I am pretty as fuck, 

and no, if you want your ass sucked then go pay one of your friends to do it. Funny how you keep saying you're black even though you're mixed and white passing and yet you demonize other people for daring to claim their ethnic halves just because they are white passing. It's hypocrisy, but then again babyfairy, that's nothing new with you.

[yespoetry]

An Interview with the Authors of 'DICTIONNAIRE INFERNAL' (And Download It For Free Here)

DICTIONNAIRE INFERNAL is a co-authored with Chris McCreary and Mark Lamoureux and was originally published by Empty Set Press on Halloween 2017. With the close of Empty Set earlier this, we have partnered up with ESP and are offering the chapbook as a free ebook. You can read a poem from the chapbook here, an interview with the authors below, and download the collection here and below.

Did you write this collection to any kind of music?

Mark: This is a hard question to answer, because I listen to music more or less constantly and I listen pretty widely (Bill Corbett once told me I have "big ears").  Looking at the poems in Dictionnaire Infernal I see references to Skinny Puppy, Big Black and the theme song for The Karate Kid Part II by Peter Cetera, but that was probably Chris.  I'm sure I was listening to a lot of other stuff, too, but it's impossible to say what.

Chris: In general, I write while listening to instrumental music. The band Earth is probably my favorite for this. That said, this chapbook does have a sestina, “Abraxas,” that is in part a riff on lyrics from the band Baroness, who we both admire. (After the chapbook was published, I sent a message to the band’s singer asking if he would want a copy, but I never heard anything back from him. This might be for the best - it would be mortifying if he read the poem and didn’t like it.)

Describe your favorite meal.   

Mark: There's the socially responsible answer to this question and the honest one.  

The socially responsible one is good moules frites and a bottle of burgundy.  Red wine with seafood because I’m a madman who lives on the edge.

The honest answer is a cheeseburger that they serve at a dairy restaurant where I grew up called Shady Glen where they fry a specific type of American cheese on the fry table so that it gets sort of brown and curled and bubbly, paired with a vanilla milkshake.  Said restaurant was more or less the inspiration for my chapbook 29 Cheeseburgers.  It’s definitely Americana kitsch where the servers all wear these anachronistic uniforms and these little paper hats. 

Chris: Jenn McCreary makes great vegetarian chili. If I could cap off that meal with coffee and a salted chocolate chip cookie or three, all would be right in the world for a moment.

Choose three books that you've always identified with?  

Chris: I’ve always felt an affinity for Tolkien’s hobbits, who mostly want to avoid trouble and stay at home with a book and a good snack. Maybe The Hobbit and The Lord of The Rings count as two of the three books?  I think The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy was probably formative for me as well, particularly in terms of its fatalistic dark humor. 

Mark: I’ve definitely always identified with Satan in Paradise Lost--he is actually an ethical person who has no choice but to fractiously rebel against his creator because that’s how he was made.  He feels bad about leading the fallen angels into a conflict they are destined to lose, but he doesn’t know how to do anything else. Like Chris, I was weaned on fantasy and science fiction books--the first book I ever took out of the school library of my own accord was Ursula le Guin’s A Wizard of Earthsea because I liked the cover.  I felt an affinity to the main character, the wizard Ged, who winds up in a conflict with his own shadow, which he liberated in a ritual he was not supposed to be doing.  The shadow winds up killing his beloved pet otak, which spoke to me at the time because my parents had just gotten divorced and my mother bought me a jet-black rabbit at the state fair that I named Obsidian that was eaten by a coyote about a week later. 

Before I read “serious” books, the first books I read were comic books and I was obsessed with the X-Men, particularly the character Nightcrawler, who was the most freakish of the already freakish team. There is a graphic novel called God Loves, Man Kills in which a televangelist tries to exorcise Nightcrawler, which I found particularly moving.  I have a drawing of Nightcrawler’s signature “BAMF” onomatopoeia that appears when he teleports done by his late creator David Cockrum for me at a comic book convention when I was 12 or so that is one of my prized possessions.

Choose one painting that describes who you are. What is it?  

“The Sphinx & The Milky Way” by Charles Burchfield (Mark)

“Torches Mauve” by Franz Kline (Chris)

What’s a gif or meme that you relate to?

Mark:  I see this as akin to Caspar David Friedrich’s Wanderer above the Sea of Fog but with more screaming. 

via GIPHY

Chris: This meme is a pretty solid representation of chronic anxiety.

What do you imagine the apocalypse is like? How would you want to die?  

Chris: In middle school, I thought a lot about nuclear war and assumed that we’d all die in a fireball at any moment. (There was a period of several months where I didn’t want to be in a room without a radio or TV playing because I wanted to be able to hear the warning broadcasts as soon as they started.) Now I imagine the apocalypse as slow moving, a game of inches where basic resources like clean water are hoarded by the wealthy. As for how I’d want to die… I hope I’m at peace with friends and loved ones, no matter the circumstances.

Mark: Under the Baron Trump administration, faculty at Trump National Stable Geniuses University College must, in addition to their yearly self-evaluations, submit paperwork detailing how they are employing The Art of the Deal Parts 47-72 in their curriculum to Make America Great Again Again Again in order to justify their annual rations of Trump Sausage and potable water.  I will forget about the deadline and be summarily executed the last semester before I retire at age 108.

If you could only watch three films for the rest of your life, what would they be?  

Chris: The Empire Strikes Back, The Fellowship of The Ring, and Heathers.

Mark: Labyrinth, Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind and Close Encounters of the Third Kind.  (It was really difficult to just pick three). 

Where do you find inspiration lately?

Chris: The second season of the show Fleabag is one of the best things that I’ve seen in ages. 

Mark:  I have been writing poems to Bill Evans compositions lately, as well as finishing up a project where I “write” poems to episodes of the old Leonard Nimoy paranormal TV docuseries In Search Of.  I have done almost all of the hundreds of episodes, so I will need to find something else pretty soon.  

Where did you write most of your book? 

Chris: The poems in Dictionnaire Infernal are part of five years’ worth of poems that Mark and I have written together. Each April (aka National Poetry Month), we’ve written a poem a day and posted it to a blog. At the point when we were writing this particular series, one of us would choose a picture of a demon and riff on it, then the other person would finish the poem from there. I would often write my half of the poem first thing in the morning before homeroom at the high school where I teach or maybe later in the day while proctoring a study hall. 

Mark:  Likewise, definitely written either at home or at my office at Housatonic Community College. 

What was something surprised you recently?

Chris: This summer, we went to the shore for the first time in a few years. Our kids, who are now 16 years old (they’re fraternal twins), just got up and… went to the beach with a friend, aka without us. It was a jolt to realize that, Oh, right, they’re at an age where we don’t have to watch them in the water the whole time and scold them if they swim out too far. Although of course we ended up doing some of that, too. If I turned this anecdote into a piece of creative nonfiction, I’d begin to work some sort of metaphor here. 

Mark: At the risk of sounding cliché, as Chris mentions, parenting is pretty much a continuous stream of surprises.  To be honest, I was pretty ambivalent about becoming a parent, but ultimately I find it to be the best thing in the world.  Even at 2, my daughter is my best friend and we continue to discover surprising things about the world. I find it really easy to adopt the perspective of a small child and to see the world in that way, which is a nice panacea to the way I usually see the world. 

What do you carry with you at all times?   

Mark: Major depression and my iPod.  Yeah, I still have an iPod. 

Chris: Journal, iPhone, a 20-sided die, and an asthma inhaler.

Tell us a bit about your writing process. What works and what doesn't? What doesn't, but you keep trying it anyway?

 Chris: Left to my own devices, I’m a fairly slow, fussy writer who builds from scraps and takes a long time to shape those fragments into whole poems. I’ve tried to push myself to approach the process differently, often through the use of source texts, but the idea of a larger “project” tends to fall flat each time, and I end up writing more lyric poems with Duran Duran references in them. Collaborating with Mark over the years has freed me from my own obsessiveness - with those poems, I work quickly and don’t look back. Sometimes, though, there is still some Duran Duran.

Mark: I guess I am an ideal counterpoint to Chris because I tend to work quickly and improvisationally.  I identify with Jack Spicer’s adage that writing is dictation--it’s like capturing a mere segment of a steady flow of words.  Most of the “writing” occurs in revision and making things more (or less, depending) lucid and readable to other people, although I don’t necessarily concern myself with this too much.  It helps to have something to focus on, so I do a lot of what might be called ekphrastic writing, though the pieces themselves are rarely that ekphrastic.  Oftentimes I wind up with pieces titled for the source of the inspiration or improvisation that have little or nothing to do with the source content. I liken this to the jazz tradition of improvising upon standards. 

When I try to write something specifically “about” something starting from scratch, it usually fails pretty miserably.  Lately, though, I have been able to write more narrative things stemming from my quotidian life, which is definitely something I’ve had trouble doing in the past. 

 What are some of your daily rituals or routines?  

Chris: I’m trying to get better at establishing healthy routines. I want to meditate more regularly, for instance, but I have a tough time really establishing it as a daily practice. A lot of my established ritual is based around preparation and consumption of coffee, ideally La Colombe’s Corsica blend with Silk soy milk and raw sugar. 

Mark:  Routines are literally impossible for me - despite even my conscious intentions I will subconsciously sabotage anything that smacks of routine to my unconscious brain, which is troublesome when one is caring for a routine-oriented toddler.  I do my best to adhere to her strictly ritualized schedule nevertheless. The only part of my day that is really sacrosanct is reading non-work related stuff, sometimes for even just five minutes due to exhaustion, before I go to sleep. 

What was the hardest part about writing this book?

Chris: The most difficult aspect for me was the self-imposed deadline of finishing a poem every day, but it was also liberating. Mark and I have now completed five Aprils worth of poems - 150 of them! - without missing a day.

Mark: With these and some of the other ekphrastic projects Chris and I have done for NaPoWriMo, it is challenging to write something that isn’t merely a description or a riff on the song or image that we are writing to or about. 

Define happiness for you.  

Chris: Taking an unnecessarily long nap with my cat Frida.

Mark: Hanging out at the beach with my daughter.

Chris McCreary is the author of four books: [neüro / mäntic], undone : a fakebook, Dismembers, and The Effacements. His review of Arrive On Wave, the Collected Poems of Gil Ott, is forthcoming in Tripwire. Mark Lamoureux is is the author of four full-length collections of poems, It’ll Never Be Over for Me, 29 Cheeseburgers + 39 Years, Spectre) and Astrometry Organon. A fifth book, Horologion, is forthcoming from Poet Republik, Ltd. in 2019. Joanna C. Valente is a human who lives in Brooklyn, New York. They are the author of Sirs & Madams, The Gods Are Dead, Marys of the Sea, Sexting Ghosts, Xenos, No(body), and is the editor of A Shadow Map: Writing by Survivors of Sexual Assault. They received their MFA in writing at Sarah Lawrence College. Joanna is the founder of Yes Poetry and the senior managing editor for Luna Luna Magazine. Some of their writing has appeared in The Rumpus, Them, Brooklyn Magazine, BUST, and elsewhere. Joanna also leads workshops at Brooklyn Poets. joannavalente.com / Twitter: @joannasaid / IG: joannacvalente / FB: joannacvalente

[todokori-kun]

OK TBH I DON’T PLAY OTOME GAMES 

(don’t play any kind of game really, except for the occasional farming game when I’m bored) AND I’VE ALWAYS FELT SO AWKWARD BECAUSE I’M ACTUALLY KOREAN AND YET IT’S LIKE EVERYONE ON THE INTERNET BUT ME HAS PLAYED MYSTIC MESSENGER

but wow, that looks pretty. And it sounds really cool. Also it’s free?

You know what, I might try that out. I’ll definitely let you know if I do :D

WHAT? You dropped TG? Right when one of the recent chapters had an Urie/Saiko moment??? (like dude I totally understand your frustration but just, if you’re going to drop TG drop it after you read that scene- Saiko basically acknowledges that the CCG has turned into a slaughterhouse and she doesn’t want to be a part of it anymore (she says that if push comes to shove, she’ll become a terrorist and leave the CCG). Urie acts like he’s still a coldhearted jerk who only cares about the job and Saiko gets mad at him before running out of the house.

Urie goes to find her and they sit on swings at a playground together, apologizing and talking things over. Urie eventually says that if things don’t work out, they’ll just become terrorists (an echo of Saiko’s earlier words) and Saiko gives this really cute smile it’s just ughhh <3333)

OH Food Wars! I’ve heard of it ^^ I don’t like Echhi so I probably won’t watch it though (anime fanservice in general is something I don’t really like. Like, if it’s meant to be a pure fanservice series then that’s fine, I probably wouldn’t watch something like that in the first place- but when an anime/manga with a decent plot and interesting concepts decides to go and ruin all that with awkward panty shots and weird anatomy that’s just. not my thing lol).

Tatsuo is definitely a glorious bastard.

(I’m doodling him and Naomi a lot nowadays and no matter how I draw them you could never tell that they’re siblings. Naomi just looks like a sweet, average girl and Tatsuo looks like the lovechild of Greedling and Kimblee.

Also, I don’t have that much good art to show you right now, but I’ll probably be able to send some tomorrow or the day after (warning: it’s still not good, and this isn’t just me being insecure) :D)

Yep, I’m on volume two now (or was it three?) and it’s darker than it looks…it’s fun, though! I started it for Hisoka but I’m liking the main characters way more than I thought I would. Gon and Leorio are probably my favorites (Gon=the MC, sweet little boy with amazing instincts. Leorio=one of Gon’s friends, pretends that he wants to become a ‘Hunter’ just for the money but it actually goes deeper than that: his friend was ill but Leorio didn’t have enough money to pay for his treatment and the friend died. Then Leorio decided to become a doctor so he could help people like his friend, but he realized that he needed even MORE money to complete all the necessary studying/training to become a doctor. That’s his real reason for wanting to become rich.).

I just finished Volume 26 of the manga! Only one more volume to go 0.0

Scar’s development is awesome. Everyone’s development is really good (and I don’t actually dislike anybody other than the obvious ones (AKA Father)!).

TRUTH: I am the original Dwarf in the Flask. I write cutesy/angsty headcanons and revel in the reactions from you common, weak humans…

(Question, though: which FMA character do you think you’re like, personality-wise?

For me, I know this is weird but I relate to older!Hohenheim. (I relate to Al too but Al is way nicer than me so Hohenheim it is.)

I think Queen Luna is a bit like Winry + Al + Ed + Riza? idk, who do you relate to?)

Roy: ‘so, guys with long hair…’

*casually glances around the room*

*sees Ed, who’s decided to unbraid his hair and just keep it down for a while*

*smiles sweetly with murderous intent*

“Fullmetal! Would you mind getting a haircut?”

(tbh I ship Roy/Luna. A lot. And I think I sorta ship Greed(ling)/Luna too.)

Water alchemy is definitely useful. Though Air alchemy would be pretty powerful too…

However, I think I’d actually like to specialize in Medicinal Alchemy. I’d also like to learn Alkahestry :)

Queen Luna, are you trying to kill me. Seriously. I’m interally screaming right now. That’s cute as heck omg (tbh Scar-Evans, no matter what kind of relationship, would always be supremely awkward at first. Scar’s naturally silent and stern, Evans WANTS to talk to everyone but is just too shy and anxious lol (like on the outside I’m really quiet but on the inside it’s just “I can just say hi, that won’t be so bad- who am I kidding I’ll totally mess it up what am I going to say AFTER I say hi? Huh? HUH? Evans do you have a Plan B? That’s what I thought you moron, you really have no idea what to do in this situation we’re DOOMED”)

I’d probably get along well with Mei and Xiao-Mei tho.)

Yeah, I know I should appreciate how hard mangakas work to draw/write these mangas, but I did feel the tiniest bit disappointed…we waited a month for this. But maybe it’s because there are actually a lot of 'casual’ fans who don’t know about the 2CT and Yana need to confirm it (also Yana actually might not know how popular the 2CT is? And someone who doesn’t know the 2CT could totally think that Real Ciel is a clone or something).

The one new-ish thing that I learned from this chapter is that it’s getting harder to trust Tanaka XD

But yeah, the art improvement is amazing! Kuro had great detail from the very first chapter but now, I could just stare at some of the panels for hours.

That. Is awesome. Smol Nick Fury is my new spirit animal

And that’s great! I haven’t seen Homecoming yet but I’m planning to (I’m late because my little sister wants to watch it with me but she’s not done with Civil War yet. Speaking of, have you seen Civil War?).

*gasps* you do not know the glory that is otome games? You wound me, my dear Evans ;-; Just kidding, it’s your choice completely :)

OH GOD MYSTIC MESSENGER. That game is hell. It’s an amazing game, but it takes over your life considering it’s based on real time. I LOST SO MUCH SLEEP OVER IT T_T But I regret nothing. 

Because look at this cutie. 

Yep, it’s completely free! On Steam! Here’s the link!

I’ve finished 2 more routes!

This guy, Rod. He’s an asshole. Most of the time I was playing, I had the urge to stick my middle finger up at the screen. He honestly infuriates me so much.

Aand this guy, Rumpel. He’s… okay I guess. A huuge flirt, who has amnesia. His most notable moment in the game: MC (the character you play as) is sick. His response? ‘I guess you’re missing’

I honestly wanted to punch the screen.

Oh, and there’s this queen:

my heart

Well, two more routes left, I’ll get to them tomorrow or the day after that ^^

GODDAMNIT I WAS TRYING TO DROP IT =3= I guess I’ll have to read the chapter, then, since Urie/Saiko. Damn it.

I want to see those two become terrorists together. I really do.

Yeah, Food wars is like that. It had a decent premise, but then it decides that eating delicious food is the most erotic thing ever. In other words, lots of shots that are barely censored! It was actually pretty annoying. Well, I dealt with it, because I try not to drop anime when I start *guiltily looks at TG*

AAAAH I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE THE ART! I’m so excited :3 And don’t worry, in comparison to my art, I’m sure it’s flawless.

Interesting… I might start to read it soon ^^

Oooh, so you’re near the end! What’s the last thing that happened? So i can estimate the amount of feels left for you to experience huehuehue There’s a lot of them in the end. I always cry. Help.

How could I not see it? Of course you’re the dwarf! I was blind all along!

The moment I read your question, my mind shouted this: ALPHONSE ELRIC WITHOUT A DOUBT.

Yep, no doubt about it.

I suppose you are a bit like Hoenheim, though…

Honestly, I mostly relate to Riza (mostly in the ‘I’m so done w Mustang’ part hahahah (but I also love snipers, they’re really cool)), but with Al’s random fawning over cuteness hahah But I’m glad you also think of Winry, since I really admire as a character. She’s quite strong willed. 

Ed is traumatised that day. What did he do to deserve the colonel hating his hair

True, true, if you used a transmutation circle like Roy’s glove to change the concentration of the air around the target, you could make it quite lethal. 

I can see him stumbling on to you playing the piano at some point and just staying silent, because he knows how easily nervous you get and he honestly loves how peaceful you are at that moment. Probably makes a subtle comment later, so he doesn’t fluster you too much.  And then a certain water alchemist comes and starts blabbering about random gibberish, coaxing you out of your shell and he happens to come into the room (totally not because someone told him to come) and is like ????? because at this point he was convinced you’re shy around everyone. From that day on, he makes it a point to try and get close to you.

Mei is adorable! Her perception of Ed in the beginning is one of the best parts of the whole show. Just, wow.

Mm, probably. I still feel a bit disappointed =3= Well, I guess we’ll just have to wait until the next chapter.  And I’m definitely more weary of Tanaka now.  But I honestly hate how RC is treating OC like a child. It’s infuriating, since OC has shown over and over that he’s capable of handling things on his own (also we need their names, now. Please. I’m tired of calling them RC and OC)

Y’all motherfuckers don’t know nothing. But Tony’s salt. Shut your whore mouth Bruce.  Who’s the blond napping on Tony’s arm tho? I can’t figure it out ;-;

Nope, not yet ^^;;;;;;;; I’ll watch it soon?

But Peter is such a sweet cinnamon roll, I cry. Just. He tries so hard and somehow always screws up. My heart hurts for him.

ALSOALSO I’m going to dye my hair red tomorrow :3c It’s temporary, but I’m still excited about it ^^;;

[yirevm-blog]

hello here! this is ya girl rhu, straight outta gmt+1 & bringing here one of my fave ocs ( with a few tweaks, just to make him fit the haneul setting, but thankfully nothing big bc i hate meddling with my own ocs lmao ! ) by the way, my ims and askbox are always open for plotting and stuff, like this whole ass post if you wanna mcplot, while in here you’ll find the full dossier concerning my boy!

☾*✧･ﾟ:*「 min yoongi, cismale, he/him. 」did you know that there’s a human in seoul named yi ahreum? they have been here for the past three years and they are a tattoo artist. they are currently twenty-six and is a part of the ju jak. i heard that they are known to be blunt, but worry not !i heard they are also very brotherly too. remember to stay out of trouble, the magi are lurking around every corner !

now under the cut, a few info about him ( tws for parent death, cults, ableism ) :

the reason behind his name is actually pretty easy, and it’s all to blame on his late mom’s laziness in not wanting to change all the stuff she prepared for the incoming birth. his parents divorced for unknown causes few years after his birth so he has zero relevant memories about his dad or the paternal family, if not that they’re known high class peeps, probably descending from the imperial family considering the last name being ‘yi’.

his mom’s side of the family are all members of the ju jak, and of course due to blood status he was shoved in real early and real fast.

he’s born with a genetic eye disease called monochromacy, more specifically rod monochromacy, which prevents him from seeing colors ( yes, all he sees is grayscale ) and make his eyes actually pretty sensitive to light, but he knows how to take care of them and how to distinguish the basic shades based on brightness. part of the maternal family think it’s not a disease but a magi curse.

always been that one odd ball of the bunch, and unfortunately his disease and the fact he had to also train for the ju jak didn’t help especially during the crude years of highschool in which his sense of loneliness and alienation only grew stronger, and oftentimes he would refuge himself in drawing and avoiding people the most

he just recently lost his mother, after years post-highschool spent doing odd jobs and finally giving in the request of his maternal uncle to actually take him under his wing, try to get him involved more in the ju jak business ( with a huge failure ) and of course promoting his nephew’s artistic talent in his tattoo shop in seoul. he didn’t really take his mother’s death too well and it’s still an open wound for him to elaborate.

he moved officially in seoul three years ago and besides going to the shop to work and chitchatting with clients he doesn’t really know anyone: all he knows is that he wants nothing to do with the ju jak and with the whole war between humans and magi, and that he’s out of any cult-related activity ( which didnt sit well with the ju jak people, consequently still claiming him as part of the clan even if ahreum vocally claims otherwise ) and so is his tattoo shop. that’s neutral ground and neutral ground it’s gonna stay or you’re kicked out.

his fashion sense is odd and of course, exclusively grayscale. loves hats a lot. especially wide hats giving him a fake halo,occasional high soled boots and long, soft cardigans giving him a small sweater paw.

for a period his uncle dyed homeboy’s hair blue… they lasted very little. he remained with the deco something like three to four months before returning to black

has the worst attitude ever like literally, the way he spits vitriol is absurd but it’s a defense mechanism he needs to jot down because he’s gonna get even more hurt if he keeps that attitude but lmao ?? is he gonna learn ?? find out at nine #saltyonmain

honestly he’s just tired he doesn’t want to be involved in the whole magi vs humans war, he has no reasons to believe the chattering of some old crazy fanatics who happened to raise his family, he hates his combat reflexes or the whole being in a limbo bc he’s a human so magi hate him by default & he’s got his disease making him feel an outcast among humans too, so just... let him draw and tattoo people in peace.

i promise once you befriend him he’s a wholesome lot pls,,, think of him like ur local grumpy calico cat ♥

knows everything about anyone, but no one knows shit about him. unless you’re one of the shop entourage, of course. but even then there’s stuff he doesn’t say about himself for obvious reasons.

specializes in hardcore type of tattoos, aka pretty big ones with lots of detail and a very gory, pastelcore aesthetic onto it. doesn’t really like dealing with text-only tattoos and 99% you can hear him complain about how people can be stupid for wanting to get their gums inked

ju jak combat skills comprehend archery, knife / dagger throwing and mixed martial arts ! HE MIGHT NOT SEE COLOR BUT HIS AIM IS NOT JOKE and he’ll never raise a hand on someone unless he’s defending someone else or himself.

please don’t ask about his parents Like Ever

#nyareum is a thing apparently

NOTE: for my personal comfort i will not be ‘chemming’ his romantic relationship and he’s to be considered LOCKED on that front. long story short i prefer to heavily plot a romantic relationship with my muses ( in this case ahreum ), extensively even --and yes, with specific fcs, so i’d rather put this out and clear any doubt instead of leading others on because trust me, i hate being lead on and don’t want others to feel the way i did :’ any other relationship with ahreum ( platonic, brotherly, former hookup, enemies, someone who resents him because he ‘left’ ju jak for his neutral mindset, etc ) are all for grabs in terms of either plotting or chemming.