#age appropriate couples u will always be famous

[rayveneyed]

cw; suggestive / softcore smut, alcohol consumption (possibly dubcon), inappropriate workplace relationships, cisfem!reader

nanami kento is too old for fucking.

he tells you this at 1 am — in not quite as many words — a few too many somaeks in, lethargic and slow from the length of the workday. there’s enough alcohol in his system to have him silk-loose and soft, cursing more freely and allowing vulgarity (or what he considers vulgarity) to grace his ever-so-polite tongue.

you’ve never heard him like this before; you’ve never heard your straight laced coworker utter anything more than a family-friendly expletive (drat being a recurring character — old-fashioned, but endearing). but his shirt is unbuttoned at the collar and his hair is mussed, and the blush of intoxication is rising to his sharp cheekbones — and yes, he curses. it almost sounds elegant when he does it. rolling over his tongue in his poorly-lit living room, where he’d only bothered to turn one lamp on; gathering with his voice like balls of cotton wool deep in his chest.

you yourself have had one too many drinks — that is why you find warmth pooling in your stomach at the sound of his confession, at the sight of his face illuminated in honey-soft light. after all, you’d never let the barrier of strained, charged professionalism drop otherwise. you’d never accept kento’s sudden invite for a nightcap after a night already filled with drinking, surrounded by tipsy coworkers at a local izakaya; you’d never let him help you slip your heels off, deft fingers unbuckling the strap from your ankle and lingering just long enough for you to notice. you’d surely never sit so close to him on his fancy 1.5 million yen couch — and you’d never, ever entertain the comment he’d made, one that he never intended for you to hear in the first place.

“what was that?” you say, coy, as if the comment hadn’t twisted something horrid in your gut. (as if you weren’t imagining him flushed from top to bottom, panting against your neck. it’s the alcohol, you’re sure of it.) “you’re too old for all that crazy stuff? like what?”

his adam’s apple bobs. he’s sitting slumped low next to you, his head hanging backwards against the back of the couch and his gaze somewhere on the high ceilings above your head, like he can’t face you. pretty. handsome. “sorry. i was just thinking out loud.”

“i know.” you take a sip of your own somaek. “but we’re both adults here, right? i mean, i agree. i’m not as flexible as i was at 20.”

his laugh is more of a surprised huff — like he’s just as surprised as you are that your conversation has steered into such uncharted territory. perhaps he’s surprised that he’s even responding to it — but he does, rubbing at his eyes with his thumb and pointer finger. his thigh presses against yours through those infernal khaki slacks. “mm. me neither.”

you shoot him a cheeky grin. “you were getting folded like a pretzel, i presume?”

another laugh, tinged with incredulity this time. “mm. something like that.”

you both sit in silence for a moment. his apartment really is lovely — the kind of apartment you only get when you’re as diligent as nanami, putting aside money for years and steadily working his way up the hierarchal corporate ladder. high ceilings and a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows opposite his couch; a kitchen with a granite island; fancy furniture straight from an interior designer’s wet dream. it’s all neutral greys and browns, cozy and elegant and refined, and suddenly you wonder what his bedroom looks like. you take another sip of your drink.

“getting older’s not all that bad,” you say, almost offhandedly, speaking more to the tokyo skyline than your drinking companion. (you bet he has a double-king with fancy 500-count cotton bedsheets. probably some trinkets. man stuff like shavers and cuff links and aftershave.) “i like it slow anyways.”

a strange, choked sound leaves your drinking partner, and your eyes shoot over to him. you’re suddenly mortified at your careless blabbering — but drunk enough for your embarrassment to be eclipsed by a prideful ignorance. “huh? nanami-san, are you okay?”

he stares up at the ceiling once more. his throat bobs again. a slight blush has dusted the tops of his ears — but before you can linger in it, his eyes suddenly flicker to meet yours. you’re almost taken aback by it — the intensity with which his brown eyes suddenly bore into you, the sullenness and modesty from before pushed aside for something newer. something rawer. “…forgive me for my forwardness—”

“you’re forgiven.”

“—but, i…”

you swallow. he still hasn’t looked away. your breathing has stilted, stagnant and pressing, in your lungs. you fight the urge to press against the point where his thigh meets your own, already on the verge of squirming under his heady stare. “but…?”

straight-laced nanami kento breathes deeply, his chest moving with the force of it, and as his breath shudders out of him, he bites out: “i really want you, right now.”

your heartbeat rushes in your ears.

“but we’re coworkers,” kento continues, like he’s been sitting on it for a while — like he’s trying to convince himself as much as you. his hand — the one not clutching his glass, the one laying on top of his thigh, flexes. “it’s unprofessional — completely inappropriate. i should be written up for simply confessing this to you.”

“but we—” you swallow around a dry throat — all moisture in your body seemingly gathering between your legs, hot and thrumming and nowhere to go— “we’re not working right now.”

a beat of silence.

kento finally looks away from you, and you can breathe again. you grapple with the sudden influx of air in your lungs, the anxiety of misstepping broiling in the pit of your stomach. while you internally struggle with yourself, nanami sets his somaek on the coffee table, before slumping back again.

“i suppose we’re not.”

unsurprisingly, kento does not make the first move. he just sits there, one arm behind his head and the other laying limp at his side, his chin tilted towards the sky and his eyes shut as if to sleep. it’s not in a way that might be construed as arrogance — this isn’t your high school boyfriend sitting back and waiting for you to pull down his pants — it’s pure and utter indulgence. climb over him if you want. kiss him when you want. cross the imaginary line drawn in the sand when it suits you — regardless, he won’t ever touch unless you explicitly make it clear that you want him to. desire curdles in your stomach, almost painful, and it's all you can do to scrabble onto your knees beside him.

before your anxiety takes control of your faculties — before you allow your cowardice to seize your limbs — you swing a knee to the other side of his hips. you're straddling him, close enough that you're sure you're sharing the same air, and — fuck, he's much bigger than you'd anticipated. he doesn't have the wiry, lean stature of the average salaryman — somehow, between sleeping overnight in the office and drinking at izakayas almost nightly, kento's frame is sturdy and large, muscular. like he works out often. you don't know how he does it with the long hours he puts in, but your thighs almost ache with the stretch of his hips between them — and pressed right against you, right where you're sensitive and aching and perhaps a little too needy, is his clothed cock. the slacks do little to camouflage the shape or hardness of it — in fact, you swear you feel it twitch when you seat yourself against it.

kento's eyes flutter open. his cheekbones are slowly reddening, his glasses hooked low on his nose bridge. his arms twitch where they lay, like he was about to move to hold you and thought better of it. you wish he didn't think better of it. "hi."

you give a little smile, hopefully looking less like you're brimming with excitable energy than you actually are. his lips really are quite close to yours. if you just leaned forward... "hi."

they're not chapped, his lips, but not shining with lip balm. they're soft looking and slightly pink, naturally down-turned in a way that makes him seem grumpy most of the time. but they're quirked up in a little smile, now, and all you can think about is how they might feel against yours. your lip gloss has long since rubbed off, between drinking and eating and drinking again, but would the remnants of glitter smear against his lips? would he come away tasting cherries?

kento clears his throat.

"i have to be honest with you," he says. he adjusts his glasses smartly, the way he does at the office, the way that has all the your female coworkers swooning. "i'm… passed the age of doing things no strings attached — that is to say, if—”

heart suddenly swooping in your chest — delighted at being indulged, of having your affections returned — and brain whizzing along like a child who's had too much sugar, you connect your lips with little fanfare. you're perhaps too enthusiastic — prodding his mouth with your tongue as soon as he'll let you, leaning forward until your chests press together and you can almost feel his heart beating through his skin. his lips are soft, after all. soft but weathered, moving so pleasantly against yours — and then his hands squeeze at the plushness of your hips, his teeth take your bottom lip between them, and—

you're panting when you pull away. panting and flushed and hot all over, barely an inch between you for fear of distance. you’re hot where you’re connected, so filled with nervous, excitable energy you think you might wither; nanami’s grasp on you, steel-tight and warm, does little to help. it’s all you can do to give yourself a second to recuperate, chest heaving — and nanami seems just as bad off. the usually well-kept salaryman looks a mess underneath you, with his lips swollen, his eyes half-lidded, and his breathing uneven — even then, though, his eyes are far too intense for you to calm any.

“to be honest,” you say, "i’m — i’m a little too old for that, too, kento."

another small smile. the gap between you is filled once more. you both call in sick that morning.

[toxoiddiamond]

T H E B A S I C S Given Name: Ryoga Zaizen Nicknames: Ryo Age: 38 Birthday: September 5th Zodiac Sign: Virgo Birthplace: Hakodate, Japan Current Location: He recently moved to Gzira, Malta, after having lived in Yokohama, Japan for nearly thirteen years. Speaks: He is fluent in both Japanese and English. He is starting to learn Maltese, but can only have a very basic conversation at this point. Dominant Hand: Right Education: He completed junior high, but opted not to continue on to high school and started working instead so he could help out his family. Occupation: Voice actor, mostly in anime and video games. Most of his voice work is in Japanese, but he occasionally does some in English as well. Every once in a great while, he does some live action acting, but it’s not his preference. Vehicle: 2018 Peugeot 5008 SUV in navy blue. Worldly Possessions: Some very nice recording equipment that allows him to do his voicework from home. A small family altar that he doesn’t actually pray to, but likes having around for nostalgic reasons. Lots of toys and things for his kids. Lots of DVDs and blu-rays of various films of all genres, with a whole shelf dedicated to family-friendly movies and shows. Pet(s): He recently got a one-year-old Shikoku Ken, partly to try and distract his kids from all the upheaval and turmoil in their lives at the moment. He wasn't too sure about having a dog at first, but now he really enjoys having a pet. The dog's name is Kotaro, meaning "small boy."

A P P E A R A N C E Height: 6'1" Hair: Ryoga enjoys trying all sorts of different colors and styles with his hair. He's had just about every color of the rainbow in his hair at some point, and when he was younger he experimented with having super long hair, mohawks, all kinds of things. Nowadays he tends to keep it cut into a more sophisticated, conservative style, but he still enjoys dyeing it various colors. Currently it is a light blue-gray. Facial Hair: He prefers to be clean-shaven. Eye Colour: Dark brown Skin Tone: He enjoys spending time outdoors, so he isn't super pale or anything; he has almost an olive undertone to his skin. Clothing: Most of the time he dresses in a fairly casual manner; his go-to look is skinny jeans paired with a graphic tee and either Vans or combat boots. But he also cleans up very nicely when the occasion arises. He has a few suits in various colors, patterns and styles and they all look amazing on him. Ryoga has a good sense of fashion and always manages to dress perfectly for any occasion. Distinguishing Marks: He has tattoos– like, so many tattoos on his arms, hands, chest, back, legs, basically everywhere except his face tbh. Face Claim: Miyavi

H E A L T H Physical Health: For the most part, his health is pretty good– he takes good care of himself, exercises, eats well, etc, especially because he wants to set a good example for his kids. However, he has had mild issues with his heart ever since he was a teenager– he has a slight arrhythmia and bradycardia (slow heart rate), but has managed both conditions fairly well throughout his life. He has had to stay in the hospital a couple of times after his heart rate slowed enough to cause him to faint, but he now tries to stay active and take his medication regularly so it (hopefully) doesn’t happen again. Physical Abilities/Limitations: He has a lot of upper body strength, partly from working out and partly from carrying his daughter around all over the place. He is also surprisingly flexible and enjoys doing yoga and tai chi as a form of gentle exercise. He’s always been good at imitating people/doing impressions and putting on different voices, which is what eventually led him to becoming a voice actor. Addictions: He used to drink a lot, but completely gave up alcohol in his mid-twenties, around the time he got married. This was partly because he wanted to try and be a more responsible person, and partly because his doctor recommended that he give up, or at least cut way back, on alcohol for the sake of his heart. Allergies: Shellfish Mental Health: Ryoga is under a lot of stress right now, so he’s not at his best. He’s had a lot of anxiety over his (very messy) divorce, then a brutal custody battle (he ended up getting sole custody), and then having to get a restraining order against his ex-wife when she kept showing up at their home and trying to get the kids to come with her, then throwing fits when Ryoga stopped her from taking them. Now that they’ve moved to a whole other country, he feels a bit better, less nervous, but he’s still constantly worried that his ex is going to show up any day. He has done his best to drill it into the kids’ heads that if their mom shows up, they are not to go with her and they need to come get him or call the police right away.

H I S T O R Y Summary: Long or Short Job History: His first job was at a small, hole-in-the-wall beef bowl shop when he was fourteen– he started as a busboy but was quickly moved into a kitchen staff position. A couple of years later, he was scouted by a modeling agent and ended up falling into the world of fashion modeling. He wasn’t super famous or anything; he mostly modeled alternative/goth/street fashion rather than anything too mainstream. This allowed him to network with a lot of people who were able to pull some strings for him and get him auditions for voice work, and within a few years, he had transitioned fully into voice acting (which he is now actually pretty famous for– in Japan, at least). Fondest Memories: Some of his childhood memories, such as family trips, or evenings when everyone was home and actually hung out together instead of going to their separate rooms. His wedding day, which is bittersweet to look back on, but at the time was one of the happiest days of his life. The births of both his children. Various anime conventions he’s gone to– he loves meeting fans and talking to them. Worst Experiences: His father losing his job– it sent the entire family into a downward spiral of anxiety and Ryoga always felt he had to walk on eggshells around them. Having to skip out on high school so he could work and earn money to help his family. His parents being more than a little angry with him when he became a model, started getting tattoos, etc., since they thought he was “ruining his life.” His parents later disowning him when he told them he was dating a man. And, of course, the slow and painful death of his marriage which resulted in a very, very messy divorce.

C O M M U N I C A T I O N Speech Pace/Style: It depends on the situation. If he’s working or in a more professional setting, then he is very respectful, using only polite language. When he’s with friends, he’s louder and more outspoken, and far less polite– not that he’s rude, just that he has a bit of a mouth on him. With his kids, Ryoga is very laid-back for the most part, speaking calmly to them and keeping a patient, gentle tone. Even when he scolds them, he doesn’t raise his voice much, though he can be very firm when he needs to be. Accent: Ryoga has a noticeable Japanese accent when he speaks English, but it’s not so thick that it’s hard to understand him. He speaks very clearly and enunciates well. Favorite Phrases or Words: Tends to say “Aa! Sou?” when he’s surprised about something, which just means “oh, really?” Also tends to say “ehto” instead of “um” or “uh.” Usual Curse Words: He tries to watch his language when he’s with his kids, though he does slip up on occasion (and they always call him out for it). He does have quite a mouth on him though, both in English and in Japanese, and uses whatever curse word feels most appropriate for the moment.

P E R S O N A L I T Y, M I N D S E T, A N D B E L I E F S Personality Type: INFJ-T Sense of Humor: With his kids, he’s pretty goofy and silly, always joking around with them and keeping them entertained. He does a lot of voices that make them laugh. When he’s around adults, he’s more sarcastic but still on the goofy side more than anything. Habits: He is hardly ever barefoot– he always wears socks or house slippers when he’s inside. He tends to eat rice with every meal if possible, in some form or another, or else it doesn’t feel like an actual meal to him. If he’s wearing any nail polish or anything, he tends to pick at it whenever he gets nervous or stressed out. Quirks: Ryoga really enjoys treating himself to things like spa days, mani-pedis, massages, anything along those lines. He doesn’t do it all the time, but once a month or so he gets someone to watch the kids and just takes a full day to himself to relax. He also loves taking baths and keeps various bath salts and oils around so he can take a nice, long bath at home if he’s had a rough day. Fears/Phobias: Anything happening to his kids; he worries about them constantly. His ex-wife finding him and showing up, even though he has a restraining order against her. He also tends to be a bit secretive about his sexuality, after facing some backlash/discrimination for it in Japan– he’s not exactly afraid of anyone finding out that he’s bi, but there’s a reason why he doesn’t offer that information very freely. Strengths: Something Flaws: Something Hopes/Desires: Something Wildest Fantasy: Something Self-Esteem: Something Religion: Something

R A N D O M Sleeping Position: Something Boxers or Briefs?: Something Day or Night?: Something Top or Bottom?: Something Partying or Relaxing?: Something

R E L A T I O N S H I P S Closest Friend: Something Relationship History: Something Sexual Partners: Something Thoughts About Sex: Something

P A R E N T S Name(s): Mom and Dad Age(s): Ages Social Standing: Blue collar, white collar, whatever Occupation(s): What they do Religion: What do they believe Quality of Relationship With His Children: Is good or bad? Living/Deceased: Maybe they dead

S I B L I N G (S) Name(s): First Last Age(s): Ages Social Standing: Blue collar, white collar, whatever Occupation(s): What they do Religion: What do they believe Quality of Relationship with Character: Is good or bad? Living/Deceased: Maybe they dead

D A I L Y L I F E Living Arrangements: Where they live

[keanuvibe]

Professor Reeves (Keanu Reeves x Reader)

A/N: Okay, here it is. The full continuation of the teaser i posted earlier this week :) I'm v excited about this okee. Thank u @keanusreefs for inspiring me, ily<3

Words: 7.0K

Warnings: Swears, Age-gap, SMUT ;), teacher/student (does that need a tag?)

Disclaimer: all characters, places, and people are of my own imagination save for Keanu :) thank you for reading <3

The bell ringing overhead signaled the end of class and the shuffle of students erupted throughout the quiet room. The mild anxiety that came with first day nerves began infecting your veins again, and you took a deep breath standing up. You gave the teacher a nod on the way out, beginning the trek to your final class of the day.

You are a freshman in college, a newbie. However, the catch is: you’re twenty-eight. You started late, leaving highschool with big aspirations didn't turn out like you’d hoped. Being into movies and film since you were a young child, you decided a career in acting was your best option to maybe, eventually, move up in the ranks and get famous. Shortly after high school graduation, you moved to New York and began starring in small plays. Each night you hoped a scout would enter the audience and give you the break you were looking for, but over the years nothing happened. During the day you worked as a bank teller, having started after running out of money. The job was great, and you ended up staying at that location for six years before it got robbed. 

You ended up moving back to your home state and with your parents at twenty-six. You were kind of a deadbeat for two years before your parents urged you to take a couple ‘fun’ classes at the local community college; mentioning how the school had a wonderful drama program. Having nothing better to do, you took out a small student loan, got a part-time job as a waitress, and enrolled at Tulip Ridge Community College focusing on Theater and Acting. You chose a few small art classes to fill the first few hours of the day, and a required English course as well, leaving your last class of the day to be Drama.

Luckily, the theater department wasn’t far from English, being that it is the class prior. You made it to the Drama room placed in a large room just off the hallway from the auditorium, greeting a hustle of students. The ages ranged, but for the most part it looked to be teens fresh from highschool. You scanned the room, greeting the over decorated space. Props from previous shows, you assumed at least, littered the painted white brick walls leaving barely any white to show. Long tables with cheap plastic school chairs sat in the middle of the room, parallel to a large prop presidential stand. On the wall behind the stand was the whiteboards with a projector screen pulled down covering the center.  You assumed that was where the teacher stood. You didn’t even know their name.

In the back of the room stood a mock carpeted stage. It was most likely the place they either used to practice plays when the auditorium was occupied or sat an audience in when they did more intimate shows with a smaller crowd, like a dine-in show. You did plenty of those with your theater company in New York. 

Picking a table that was empty, you quickly hustled to it before anyone else could and sat down in a corner seat. As a couple minutes passed, more rowdy theater kids had filled the room; greeting the others from their summer breaks. Most of the crowd seemed young, however the wonderful thing about community college is there's always going to be older people. 

“Hi, I’m June.” A high-pitched tone spoke, catching your attention. Turning your head, you noticed a lady had taken the seat next to your own. She looked older, maybe early thirties. She donned long brunette hair and was dressed as though it was the year 1984.

“Oh, uh, Hi.” You smiled back, holding your hand out to shake instinctively, “I’m (Y/N).”

“Nice to meet you, (Y/N).” She smiled wide. “Not to pry, but, I haven’t seen you at Tulip Ridge before, are you new?” June seemed like a preppy type, but very vintage.

“Oh, yeah. I’m a freshman.” You responded with a slight chuckle.

“Oh, well, welcome!” The woman responded, cheer evident in her tone. You were about to respond and ask her a few questions, however you were interrupted before you began. 

“Good afternoon class, I’m Professor Reeves.” The humble, deep voice of the teacher startled you and you quickly glanced in his direction. Eyes widening, you greeted the sight of the delicious man. He was tall, towering over the presidential podium prop he stood behind. His hair was long and disheveled framing his face perfectly. He donned a dark brown tweed jacket with a soft green button up underneath, however, and unfortunately, you couldn’t see the bottom half. 

“Welcome back, how were your breaks?” He asked, looking around the room. Students that seemed to know the man chimed back with colorful answers, prompting the man to laugh. You looked over to June who seemed engaged and intrigued by whatever the man was doing. So, is Professor Reeves the hot teacher of Tulip Ridge? What makes it even worse is he’s the Drama teacher. You’ve always had a weakness for theater boys; probably just the inner thespian in you. You had a few boyfriends back in New York, however their ego’s always tended to get the best of them and you’d have to break things off. 

“I see a few new faces in the crowd this year, let’s see,” Professor Reeves’ dark eyes scanned the class once again; eyes connecting with your own. You felt a chill run down your spine as the swarm of dormant butterflies in your tummy rushed to life. 

“What’s your name, breaktaking?” You felt your stomach drop as the teacher gestured towards you. A nervous snort escaped your throat and you felt your cheeks gain heat like a house on fire. You could perform in front of hundreds of people; yet the single attention of this one man was eating you alive.

“it’s- it’s (Y/N).” You nervously chuckled in response. The eyes of your classmates didn’t help the heat retaining in your cheeks. June gently patting your back snapped you back to reality and you looked in her direction. She gave you a reassuring nod, humoring the teacher still. 

“And what compelled you to pursue acting, (Y/N).” Your name rolling off of Professor Reeves’ tongue made the butterflies excite even more and you cleared your throat in an attempt to brush off some embarrassment. 

 “Um, well, I’m not exactly new to acting and drama. I’ve been doing this medium since I was seven. After highschool I even performed in New York for a bit, but um, just small shows.” You answered with a shrug, keeping focused on the teacher. The stares from the other students were burning into your skull, but you ignored them.

“So, what’re you doing at Tulip Ridge then?” The teacher pushed, his dark eyes gleaming into your own. He leaned forwards on the podium a little, his attention still burning at you. You sat up in your seat slightly, not really wanting to admit to a room full of strangers that you feel like a loser and deadbeat and are only here because your parents convinced you.

“Well, I-” You paused, “I want to further my education, that’s reason enough. Plus, there’s no better place to start than community college.” Typical answer, but it hides the truth enough, you guess. Professor Reeves’ stare indicated he knew you were hiding something. You kept eye contact long enough before another student spoke up breaking the stare.

--

The abrupt bell ringing interrupted the movie that was playing on the projector screen. The class erupted as everyone began to gather their things and shuffle out for the day. Shortly after all the new and old students had been introduced, the Professor had quickly jumped into the curriculum for the semester. He went over the syllabus as well as the first project you’d be doing in the class; which is to perform a quick, no longer than three minute, scene from your movie of choice. It has to consist of at least two characters and be school appropriate, obviously. Of course you and your new table mate decided to partner up for the project with high hopes of good scores.  

Speaking of the enthusiastic woman, you and June had talked throughout class slowly learning about the other. You discovered that she is thirty-one, works part-time in a bakery and has a four year old son. She isn’t married, but her and her son’s father are on good co-parenting terms. She’s been going to Tulip Ridge for one year now, making this her final year before she moves on to a four year college. She decided to go back to school after her and her son’s father split, leaving her with half an income but a full child to feed.

“Where are you headed after this?” June asked, tossing her long hair over her shoulder and grabbing her backpack.

“Back home, I’m sure my mom will want me to do some chores for her. I’ll research a scene for us and send you a link, as well. How about you?” You smiled at the woman. Being only a couple years younger than June felt nice, as most of your class as previously mentioned is overenthusiastic teenagers.

“You have got to move out, Sugar.” June laughed with a shake of her head. “I’m going to pick up my kid from daycare and spend a few hours with him before work tonight.” You could tell the woman loved her child a lot. Her voice and demeanor always softened at the mention of him. It almost made you feel the rush to be a mother; but you’re still young.

“Trust me, I know.” You responded with a chuckle. Shortly after, June said her goodbyes and excused herself. As she exited with the main crowd, only a few stragglers remained including you. You scanned the room, greeting the sight of Professor Reeves standing by the door saying his goodbyes to the students. You scanned him up and down now, actually being able to see his bottom half.

He was attractive, there was no doubt about that. The man was goofy too, as you’d expect a Drama teacher to act. During class you asked June if she knew anything about him and she actually gave you a quick rundown. Apparently he used to be a famous Hollywood star back in the mid-eighties to nineties. He did quite a few indie films, and one or two blockbusters. He fell off the radar in the year two-thousand after his wife died; resurfacing as a teacher in your rinky-dink hometown seven years later. The catch is, nobody knows his real name; at least locally. He keeps it hidden, only going by as Professor Reeves or Mr. Reeves. The fact you’d never heard of him kind of shocked you, but it really seemed like the fame world had moved on from your teacher. Students somewhat reacted to him, if they were film buffs, but otherwise he seemed like he lived a quiet life.

Your teacher's eyesight meeting your own caused you to stop staring finally. As a hot blush covered your cheeks once again, you quickly focused back down onto your backpack acting as though you were doing things. The room now sounded mostly quiet, and the pad of the Professors shoes echoed louder to your person.

“Miss (Y/N).” The deepness of his voice gave your spine a chill. You shyly looked up, greeting your teacher. Up close he was stunning. Gorgeous dark hair framed his face and dark full eyebrows covered his fierce brown eyes. You, however, were loving his salt and pepper speckled beard. 

“Professor Reeves.” You greeted back, swallowing the intimidation. The man towered over your smaller frame, you couldn’t help but want to climb him like a tree (it’s been seven months since you last got laid. Things have gotten heated).  

“It’s always refreshing to see new students.” He gave you a small grin. “You said you’ve done shows in New York? What’re you doing back here, superstar?” The man joked. The familiar hot feeling flooded your cheeks and you released a nervous chuckle, quickly casting your eyes to your shoes.

“Well- Like I said earlier: to further my education.” You managed, gathering the courage to make eye contact again. “I could ask you the same. You were a blockbuster star.” When your eyes met, butterflies erupt in your stomach again. What was it about this man that made you so horny and shy at the same time. His eyes narrowed slightly, as though he was saying touche. 

“Well, I’d love to see your work some time.” The deep tone in his voice gave you another shiver down your spine as you kept the eye contact.

“I’d love to see yours. And, uh, then I’ll see if I have a copy somewhere. I did Phantom back in New York. Well, I was ensemble, but…” You trailed off, chuckling to cover the nervous feeling. 

“Ensemble is the backbone of theater, darling.” Professor Reeves’ hand gently tapped your arm after his comment. You felt the shock of his touch and immediately made eye contact as you did so. The man must’ve felt the same, as his eyes shot to yours as well. 

“I-I’d better get going.” You spoke so quietly, quickly shuffling past your teacher. However, you felt his hand linger as you pulled away. You felt as each individual finger dragged against your body before you were out of reach. That’s definitely going to help some tension releasing activities tonight. 

--

It’s been three weeks since the first day and college isn’t too bad, you’ve come to discover. Befriending June was a good option, as you two easily got along being similar in age. You even met her son the other day after school. Plus, your classes are simple too; only taking Art and English credits was a smart decision. Drama had quickly taken place as your favorite class, however. Acting was fun, but your Professor also had taken part in your sway on the choice.

“Alright, we’re going to be doing the quick-minute scenes today, I hope you all came prepared.” The drama teacher's voice settled the rowdy crowd of students as he walked into the room. June slunk back into the chair next to you and you glanced towards the woman. She didn’t have as much performance history as you, she’d mentioned at one of your practices that she was nervous for today. You leaned over and gave her a gentle pat on her shoulder.

“Run over the lines again, it’s gonna be great.” You smiled gently. The woman pulled out the sheet you’d been using to run lines and you saw as she began to mouth the words.

Looking back towards the front of the room, you caught your teacher's eyes. He stood up by the podium, a student clearly trying to converse with him although his eyes seemed fixated towards you. Realizing you were staring in return, he quickly turned his attention back towards the student, consciously adjusting the way he was standing. You bit the inside of your cheek, suppressing the smile that dared to take over and quickly cast your eyes towards the desk again.

The professor quickly got the class into order, quieting everybody down. He stood behind the stand, now facing everybody as they adjusted into their seats. The man shuffled a few papers around before looking back up and tucking some hair behind his ear. You sighed quietly, slinking further into your chair and crossing your legs. Your crush was only getting worse. 

“So, before I start calling names, who’d like to present first.” Professor Reeves made a point to look directly at you. You raised your brow, shaking your head ‘No’ slowly. June would die if you two went first anyways. His eyes then moved on, looking at the other groups of students before he clicked his teeth and shrugged, choosing one of the fresh-from-highschool kids. 

The kid sighed loudly, tapping his partner on the shoulder and standing up. Professor Reeves pushed the podium out of the way and to the side so the students could stand front and center.The two of them introduced themselves as Travis and Mike before jumping into it. As they started, you easily recognized the scene to be from the third Lord of The Rings installment, when Gandalf gives Pippin the speech about death. 

June’s phone sitting on your table vibrated and she quickly picked it up to avoid any more distraction. You glanced over to her, watching her read the text and her expression turn more sour with each word. Furrowing your brow, you scooted your chair closer and quietly whispered.

“What’s wrong?”

The woman didn’t answer right away, instead you could see as her eyes reread the text before she finally seemed to snap to reality.

“M-My son got into trouble at daycare- I need to go. I can’t perform our presentation today.” She seemed annoyed by this but started to collect her things. I guess it was the last class of the day anyways, and you’re sure you can convince Professor Reeves to extend your scene to tomorrow. 

“That’s okay. We’ll figure it out, go.” You gave her a reassuring nod and she smiled back. After gathering her things and waiting for the current group to finish, she stood up and quietly made her way to your teacher, asking to be excused. The man seemed to comply as she thanked him and quickly turned to leave, giving you a small wave and smile on the way out the door. You let your smile linger before a quiet sigh escaped.

Class proceeded normally. A few groups went before the Professor ended up calling your name. He clearly saw your partner leave, so what is he planning?

“(Y/N), why don’t you give your presentation?” His deep voice always had some sway over you. But you resisted, biting the inside of your cheek.

“Uh, my partner had an emergency and left.” You spoke, furrowing your brow. Your teacher nodded, acting as though it was new information in front of the class before he looked back at you.

“Well, maybe I can be your partner today. What were you going to perform?” The coy expression that covered his face said all it needed to. You felt the mock anger that covered the romantic feelings you felt made itself present and you let out a sigh before answering.

“Alright, well, we were going to perform an excerpt from ‘Moulin Rouge’, um, right before they burst into ‘Silly Love Songs’. I have a copy of our lines if you want.” As you spoke, you’d already gathered your copy of the sheet and made your way to the front. Ignoring the stares of your classmates was the best way to deal with your nerves, even though their eyes were burning into you like you were a demon and they were holy water. You were about to perform with your teacher, and that needed all of your focus currently. Handing over the sheet, your fingers brushed and an electric feeling coursed through your body starting from your fingertips. It gave a jolt to your heart, stuttering your breath for a moment. 

“Um, June was a bit scared to do the minor singing part, so I’ll be playing Christian and you’ll be Satine.” You spoke, first looking towards the Profesor then glancing across the class. A few muttered laughs came from the immature minds humoring at the gender switch. The man let out a low chuckle himself but nodded, holding up the sheet so he could read the lines. 

“Christian, I’m a courtesan. I’m paid to make men believe what they want to believe.” Your teacher began, his eyes cast between your reaction and the paper. You quickly got into character, prepared to react.

“Yes. Silly of me, to think y-you could fall in love with someone like me.” You spoke with a sigh, feigning to be sad. 

“I can’t fall in love with anyone.” The man responded with a sad chuckle, stepping closer towards your figure. You felt your heartbeat raise slightly. 

“Can’t fall in love? But a life without love… That’s terrible!” You lightly exclaimed, leaning into the character more. You and June chose the movie having seen it as young girls and loving the romance of it all. Of course you ended up doing a romantic scene with Professor Reeves.

“No!” The man reacted, “Being on the street, that’s terrible.” His tone suggested he was getting defensive just as Nicole Kidman did playing the line.

“No, love is like oxygen!” You reacted again, stepping towards the man. As you got further into the scene, your nerves began melting away. The second hand feeling that came when you did act was starting to kick in. It's been a while since you last did a show, since you left New York two years ago. 

“What?” He spoke, furrowing his brow. You started pacing towards him more.

“Love is a many-splendored thing, love lifts us up where we belong, all you need is love!” By now, you were in his face, arms spread with determination; just like you’d practiced with June. 

“Please, don’t start that again.” Professor Reeves sighed, his hand placing itself on your shoulder and lightly pushing away.

“All you need is love,” You began singing softly, leaning closer to him. 

“A girl has got to eat!” He exclaimed, taking a step away.

“All you need is love,” You sang again, a smile overtaking your face. Your teacher stepped back, turning away from you, really leaning into the character. You assumed he’s seen this move before by how well he was acting. 

“She’ll end up on the street!” He spoke again, turning to face you again. You got up close again, capturing his hand into your own, your faces positioning closer than they should be.

“All you need is love…” You sang softly to finish off your lines, eyes connecting with your teachers. You hadn't noticed the slight wrinkle around them until now, and couldn't help the endearment that rushed your body. 

“Love is just a game.” The professor didn’t sing the part like in the movie; instead he spoke it, but the emotion that line carried still was present. You were getting swept away in the intensity of the scene. His dark brown eyes stared back into your own, hinting his own feelings of lust and want. The sound of someone's chair scraping brought you back to reality and you quickly stepped away to a normal distance. Clearing your throat, you turned towards your classmates and took a quick bow before making your way back towards your table. The burning stare of your teacher's eyes into your back definitely didn’t help. 

“Good job (Y/N). I’ll go ahead and give June the credit too.” Professor Reeves spoke as soon as you sat down after the class had finished clapping. You nodded towards him, trying to catch your breath from the whole situation. You wish June were here to witness that, though. She wouldn’t believe it, and to be honest, you could barely believe it either. 

--

The library was surprisingly empty for prime studying hours, then again, it is a Friday afternoon. Most students are probably drunk right now, pregaming for the weekend, anyways. You, however, decided to study for some test in English at the library instead of going home. You didn’t really want to deal with your parents anyways. Ever since you started school, they’ve been more helicopter-y and won’t leave you alone when you’re home. They want to know everything and it’s exhausting. You honestly miss living alone. Your parents are treating you like you’re in high school again, over eleven years ago. No matter, it was nice to escape the insanity with the quiet, always warm because of the broken heater, library. 

Plus, the escapism helps with distracting your brain from a certain someone. Ever since your presentation in Drama with Professor Reeves about three and a half weeks ago, you’ve been kind of avoiding him. That happening did nothing to help your crush, in fact it only made it worse. He is so handsome and you just can’t help it. His dark, lengthy hair that he often tucked behind his ear; His dark, fierce and sultry eyes that lured you in every time you caught stares. You, without a doubt, are smitten for a man whose not only an authority-ish figure in your life, but twice your age.

The acting exercises you did in class were not helpful either. You noticed he’d minorly started favoring you to play roles. Of course the students hadn’t caught on yet because he hid his favoritism so well, but you just went along with it. Secretly, you kind of wanted to see how this would play out. It’s been nearly two months since the semester started, and the spark you seemed to have acquired hasn’t fizzled. 

“Miss (Y/N)? Not partying?” Professor Reeves spoke behind you. Jumping slightly, you sat up and turned around to look at the man. You already saw him in class today, well, avoided him in class today. This is like a waking nightmare to see him in a safe space. Hiding your feelings, you swallowed before answering. The look on his face was innocent, but you never know what feelings he could be hiding too.

“You scared me,” You commented before continuing, “And, uh, no. It’s not really my scene anymore.” You muttered with a chuckle, turning back towards the table. The echoed footsteps from your teacher indicated he was going to take a seat at the table you currently occupied. Sitting up, you glanced around the library as he did so, but came across nobody.

“Anymore? You look quite young.” He spoke, setting a few books down that he’d had in his grasp. You didn’t notice them before. 

“I’m almost thirty, I’m not young.” You commented with a dry chuckle, finally gathering the courage to look at your teacher. He gave you a laugh, prompting you to let a smile break.

“Well, I’m in my mid-fifties so what does that say about how old I am?” He rebuttaled with humor lacing his tone. You finally broke the resistant act and chuckled, looking towards him. He gave you a soft smile in return, enjoying seeing you filled with humor. The man didn’t want to admit that he also had developed some type of emotion for you as well. Since the moment you introduced yourself he knew you were going to be an issue. Not necessarily a bad thing, just a hindrance. He’s seen a lot of students come and go over the years he’s been teaching, but you’re the first one that’s captivated his eye, ever.

“Right, sorry.” You laughed, looking back towards the notes you’d been writing on. The two of you fell into a silence before your teacher spoke up.

“Hey, are you okay? It seems as though you’ve been avoiding me... If I’m overstepping as your teacher let me know-” The deep voice of your teacher has gone quiet, you knew he wanted to keep this private. 

“No- No… You’re right.” You cut him off, sighing and rubbing your temple quietly. “I, uh, I have been.” The silence of your teacher caused you to look up at him. It was kind of strange to be having such a candid conversation with this man, though he’s just like any other human on earth. 

“Well, may I ask why?” He asked quietly, almost sounding hurt from your choices. You nodded hesitantly before proceeding. Were you about to admit your feelings? Can you even do that? Is it even legal for faculty and students to date? Well, that is if you even date. 

“Ever since our... well my presentation… There's been this weird energy between us and I honestly don't know how to react.” Your voice remained quiet as you spoke and your eyes kept pointed towards the table. Though, you could feel Professor Reeves’ eyes boring into the side of your face. 

“(Y/N)...” The voice of your teacher caught your attention and you looked up. His eyes glanced around the room before he stood up in one quick motion. The towering height of the man was slightly intimidating, however he leaned over swiftly, capturing your face with both of his hands and connecting your lips. 

Fireworks. Explosions. Electricity.

These were all the words you could use to describe the way his lips melded perfectly with your own. His stubble scratched your chin and upper lip so wonderfully and his hands help your face gently. 

The man was the first to break the kiss, as you could've stayed there forever. He parted and stayed only an inch or two away from your face, however. 

“Wow,” You softly breathed, feeling your body physically relax. A slight giggle escaped your throat as you did so. The man smiled back, gleeful from the event that just occurred. 

“I've been wanting to do that since the first day.” He spoke hushedly. You captured his lips once again before quickly shoving your things into your backpack. If things were going to escalate, there was no better time. You cast your eyes up to his, staring through your lashes hinting at the lust you were feeling. 

“The drama room, now.” You rushed, standing up and slinging your bag over your shoulder. You felt your teacher's body heat behind your figure as the two of you quickly, but trying their best to remain inconspicuous, made your way across campus to the Arts building. 

Your teacher shoved open the door, his hand hooking onto your backpack and pulling you in. He swiftly shoved the door closed and locked it shut, making sure it was actually locked. You quickly rushed towards an old prop couch in the back corner of the room, tossing your bag and jacket off. You heard your teacher's footsteps quickly follow and the heat of his hands as he grabbed your arm, flipping you around and shoving you back onto the couch. You grabbed his jacket, pulling him down on top of your figure as you fell. Your bodies felt electric causing your heart to beat faster. 

His eyes glanced down at your chest gazing delightfully at your cleavage. It only gave you confidence as you tangled your fingers into his dark locks, pulling your lips together. His hands then moved and melded firm on your ass, as he didn’t want you to get away. The scratch of his beard only added pain to the pleasure, enhancing the overall experience. Your hands found their way to Professor Reeves’ jeans; slyly unbuckling his belt and with one motion undoing his button as well.  Your hand began to explore, finding his member semi hard and still tucked away behind his underwear. You gently began to rub over the cloth, prompting the man to moan quietly into your kiss.

In the meantime, the man's hands found their way to the zipper of your pants, he’d managed to unzip it entirely and then shifted his hands to unclip your bra through your top. You broke the kiss while he sat up slightly and pulled the apparel off, freeing your legs and top, leaving you in panties and a bra. 

“Jesus, you are… breathtaking.” He muttered, eyes scanning your figure up and down. You felt the self-conscious feelings start to fill your brain and subconsciously hid your figure. Professor Reeves’ large hands grasped your arm, however, and kept you from hiding your gorgeous body.

The man’s mouth was swift to latch onto the swell of your breast, intending to mark the flesh. His fingers gently latched onto your bra, exposing your breast more. He gently kissed down the skin before his tongue swirled your nipple, occasionally flicking it with the muscle. The sensation only fueled your fire down south, and you quickly gathered the courage to gently slide your hands underneath his underwear. Your hand first met the feeling of pubes as you wrapped your hand around the base of his cock, beginning to pump slowly. 

Professor Reeves carefully maneuvered his shirt off his body, tossing it somewhere in the classroom. You admired his body; he was slightly toned on his chest, however his shoulders and arms were more defined. He donned a small patch of chest hair, and a dark happy trail that led to a nice patch of dark pubic hair. His hair was messy, and he combed his fingers through, desperate to remove the strands from his eyes. 

The man now stood up on his knees, quickly shucking off his pants and underwear leaving him completely nude. After that, You took the moment to ogle him and come to the reality that you're about to sleep with your teacher. This is a good idea, yeah? 

Professor Reeves linked his fingers into the sides of your panties, gliding them down and off your legs all while staring at you through his lashes and fallen hair. Afterwards, his fingers gently made their way to your heat, fingers toying and exploring, eyes gazing you up and down. He bit his lip, as a single digit ran up your slit, hitting your clit at the end of it’s journey. You squirmed and gasped at the sudden sensation, earning a whisper of praise from your teacher. He redid the motion, this time with two fingers. You reacted the same, a squeal and squirm, gripping your hand onto his thigh. 

“Darling, so wet for me already.” He commented, voice heavy. “How would you feel I…” He trailed off, slinking down and scooting back until his head came level with your stomach. With the last word escaping his lips, he kissed around your navel, working his way further and further down until a light kiss peppered your clit. Your hands flew to the man's head immediately tangling themselves within his long hair. He took this as an eager invitation, and began to suck your clit with excitement. One of his free hands worked its way up and began to twist your nipple gently. The sensitivity of your body caused you to moan and tighten your grip on the man's hair. His free hand left your nipple and moved down to your vagina. He continued to lick and flick your clit with his tongue as he slowly inserted a single digit. You tightened around his finger, enjoying the feeling of it all as he began to finger you carefully. 

“Oh, Professor,” A breathy moan left your lips. The man’s reaction was to finger you faster while he sucked your clit harder. His beard rubbing against your inner thigh felt so wonderful, and you nearly suffocated the man between your legs. The teacher began to move his fingers skillfully. He kept tapping your g-spot as he did so, earning even louder cries of pleasure from you. He could tell you were getting close, as you kept tightening around his fingers and were basically giving him a head massage. He gently pulled them out, and gave one last sweet kiss to your clit before sitting up on his knees again. His dick was now fully hard and he nonchalantly touched himself, scooting closer to your position. 

You sat up a little, reaching out to grab his member. Your hand replaced his and you switched positions once again, landing you on top. You moved your hair from your face and leaned your head down so your lips were just above his cock. You gently licked the tip, earning a shudder from the teacher. One of your hands gently rubbed your clit while the other held you up as you sucked the bass player off. Your tongue swirled around his member and you bobbed your head, making sure to keep your mouth as airtight as possible. He kept releasing delightful moans, occasionally letting his hand hold your head or fix your hair. He even used it to guide your bobs, keeping you on beat.

“Oh, love,” The man breathed. You cast your gaze up to his face, making sure to stay within rhythm. His  eyes were turned dark from lust as he watched your pretty mouth circle his cock. You then stopped playing with yourself and used that hand to rub him while sucking. His moans only increased and became more frequent with each nod. You finally popped off, finishing with a few kisses around his navel. You wiped the corners of your mouth with a slight grin, sitting back on your knees. The man was only harder now, periodically causing his member to twitch from need. You lazily jerked him with one of your hands as you straddled his lap again, placing you into the cowgirl position. You lined yourself up with him, your entrance just barely touching his tip. 

Professor Reeves gently placed his hands onto your hips, guiding you down onto his cock. You instantly moaned; his hard member filled you so perfectly as you sat down on him, giving you the warm feeling deep in your stomach. The man’s hand stayed firm on your hips as he began to help you bounce up and down on his dick. He even began to thrust up, only resulting in his member going deeper and harder in you.

Each ram seemed to make his hard cock find your g-spot perfectly. Your stomach kept twisting with every thrust, getting closer and closer to your orgasm. The teacher kept averting his gaze between your face and breasts while you fucked, enjoying the bounce of your figure. When you were able to, you would look into his eyes showing you how much you were enjoying him. 

Professor Reeves surprised you by wrapping his arms tightly around your bum, trapping his cock in your pussy as he lifted and laid you on your back again. He then began to thrust more rapid than you'd ever been handled before. Slaps of sweaty skin echoed around the room but you didn’t care at all in the throes of pleasure. You moaned loudly, the Professor as well, only fueling both of your satisfaction. One of his hands found its way to your clit and he began to rub with his thumb. Swirling sensations began to fill your tummy, prompting louder moans. The deep warm feeling before orgasm began to fill each of your limbs.

“Oh, baby, I’m going to cum.” You moaned, opening your eyes long enough to see your teacher's reaction. 

“Darling, cum for me.” He raised his eyebrows in bliss, immediately rubbing your clit faster and harder. In response you tightened around his cock as he thrust, causing the man to close his eyes in pleasure. The pressure was building fast and before you knew it, an orgasm overtook your entire body. You wrapped your legs around the man's back, trapping him deep within you. He let out a pleasure filled gasp as his thrusts became staggard. You could feel his cock throbbing in you as he collapsed and lay with his head snug in your neck. You both lay still, but breathed heavily trying to recover from the incredible orgasm you both just experienced.

Professor Reeves slowly sat up and pulled himself out of you, wincing from how sensitive he was. You felt his hot cum slowly drip out of your pussy, but you didn’t care. The man groaned as he laid down next to you, now both of you laying on the couch, you tucked into his side.

“That was everything I imagined it to be.” The Professor commented after a few moments of silence. You couldn’t help but let a giggle escape as you turned on your side to face the dark haired man.

“I don't even know your name, Professor. You’d think I would've figured it out by now…” You trailed off, studying the man’s face. His eyes caught yours and he let out a short chuckle. 

“I keep it hidden… for reasons.” He trailed off, mindlessly playing with a section of your hair. 

“June told me you used to be a Hollywood actor. I never did a google deep dive to respect your past and, well, you. I wanted to ask you about it instead.” You cast your eyes towards his chest and mindlessly drew shapes with your fingers. 

“It’s Keanu.” His voice was quiet, scanning your face for a reaction. You gave him a soft grin, looking up to meet his gaze.

“That’s a beautiful name.” You spoke in a whisper. He kissed the top of your head as a response, holding your figure tighter. It felt nice to be held by someone again. Keanu was the perfect man for that. Ever since the first day of class he’s made you feel safe. Most encounters with men haven't been pleasant, especially as a female actress. 

“So, when are you going to show me the tapes of your shows?” Your teacher's deep voice gave you goosebumps, and you let out a short chuckle, sitting up and reaching for your bra. In the odd chance anyone was the show up, you wanted to be dressed. 

“When you show me your movies.” You responded cheekily, eyes turning to give the man a wink. He let out a laugh as his large hand landed on your still exposed back, rubbing gently and avoiding your bra straps.

“I remember a certain lady telling me she started in and has a copy of Phantom, and it was mine.” He smirked, sitting up as well and pulling his clothing back on. You shook your head, laughter leaving your lips. 

“How about this, over the course of the semester we…” You paused, eyeing the tall man up and down, “Keep whatever this is going on.” You paused for effect, “And once in a while we’ll watch one of our shows. Deal?” It appeared as though Keanu was thinking for a few moments before he answered.

“Deal.”

[maxismatchccworld]

Patch Notes June 2019

UPDATE: 6/18/2019 – PC 1.52.100.1020 / Mac 1.52.100.1220

Hiya Simmers!

Is it hot outside, or is that just my gland problem? Anyway, let’s not worry about that - we’ve got some awesome new stuff to talk about! With all this Summer heat and with Sims 4 Island Living’s release just around the corner, we’ve got a few new free updates we are so excited to share with you! So let’s slap on some sunglasses, squeeze into that swimsuit, and dive on in...

What’s New?

Randomize Traits Button:

A Randomize Traits button has been added to CAS and in the Live Mode Age-Up Molecule. Oh yes, it’s now just right there, waiting to be clicked. Over and over and over and over. I can’t really believe it either, but here it is. The dark days without this small hero are now just a distant unpleasant memory. From here on out, if you just want to grab-and-go your Sim’s personality and get the heck outta CAS, or if you want to add a little challenge to who your Sims might be, it’s just one click away. Jeepers, this feels good. Seriously, I’ve been wanting this forever.

Lounge Chair:

Everyone (even you) gets a FREE LOUNGE CHAIR! That’s right, we’ve added a delightfully Portable Lounge Chair, so you can now lounge by the pool the way you’ve always wanted: Laid back. With your mind on your Simoleons and your Simoleons on your mind.

It’s Pride Month!

Show your pride with some fantastically colorful new clothing. The rainbow leggings are my personal favorite. Nah, maybe the body suit is my favorite. But now that you mention it, I can’t stop dressing my Sims in the new t-shirts -- created in partnership with the It Gets Better Project -- so I guess I just love it all! In addition, we’ve also included a selection of decorative Pride flags for hanging on your Sims’ walls. Finally, we’ve updated our bathroom door sets in-game so that every bathroom door also includes a gender-neutral version for builders, and includes a full suite of color swatches for mixing and matching to your heart’s content. Happy Pride Month, everyone!

Stilt Foundations:

Or as I like to call them, High Heels for your House. Or House Heels. These things don’t need to be limited to just the tropics. Stilts are a great partner in crime to manipulated and flat terrain alike in any biosphere. You can find them in Build Mode alongside all the other regular Foundation types. Now go get your stilt on.

Further Eaves Extension:

Now you can pull your Eaves… further.

More Door Colors:

Ok, we may have gone a bit overboard here… There are 350 new color swatches spread across all of the doors and arches in the base game catalog. If you’ve ever wanted matching doors in Light Brown, Reddish Brown, Brown, Dark Brown, Gray, White, or Black, then this is certainly the update for you!

A Couple New Lot Traits:

Clothing Optional: This new venue-only lot trait will inspire your Sims to -- you guessed it -- get nude.

Off-The-Grid: Now you can live out your nomadic fantasy on any lot. Applying this lot trait will remove your Sim’s use of power and running water, but on the upside it keeps your bills down. Keep a lookout for existing objects with the “Works Off-The-Grid” note in the Buy Catalog.

More Toddler Diaper Colors:

We added some L’il Swimmies Splashy Diapers! You don’t necessarily have to use them for splashing in the water, but that’s where our brains were at when we made them. We made these not only in anticipation for Island Living, but we also thought you’d appreciate more swimming options for your toddlers to use in the Seasons Kiddie Pool.

Back Float:

A new Back Float interaction is available for Sims swimming in the pool. Click on that water. Try it out. Take a load off.

Fishing Additions:

Brace yourself, we’re about to cast you into a deep dive…

We added several new interactions to allow players to fish in different ways and interact with other Sims around fishing activities.

Sims can perform a few new Fishing-based socials to gain useful info (via UI TNS/Notebook) and push NPCs to Fish.

Fishing is now joinable.

Improved fishing interaction tuning and autonomy to make the interaction more efficient and fun.

Upper skill levels now provide more meaningful rewards, with new Interactions added to Fishing skill levels

New high skill cast interaction “Angle for Big Catch” increases chance of getting rarer fish.

New high-skill VFX visuals on Rare fishing spots.

Ability to now “Mentor Sims in Fishing.”

Fishing UI has improved information, including Notebook info with Bait information.

Tuning for fish that can be caught is unique per world & more fishing spots added to some of our previously shipped worlds.

New bait preference system applied to most existing fish that modify catch chances.

Ceiling Fan Updates:

Ceiling Fans will now cool a room if you have Seasons and the fan is on. Oh yeah, speaking of which, we also added the ability to turn them On and Off. And while we were at it, we figured we’d make them dry off damp Sims too.

Ceiling Objects Build Sort:

We also added a new Ceiling Objects Build sort category to make things like Fans easier to find.

Swimming Things:

There is now a chance for interesting things to happen to your Sims while swimming, like getting a cramp or losing their suit (eek!). Swimming also now gives your Sims a boost in Fitness skill gain.

Part-Time Jobs Update:

And last but not least (you still with me?) all existing Part-Time Jobs are no longer just for Teens. That’s right, now elders could work as Fast Food Employees. Young Adults could be Babysitters if they want. Why not? The Part-Time world is your oyster. Oh oh oh -- and one last thing on that note: You can now have two Part-Time Jobs at once and pick between shifts. Wowee.

And now on to the unintended features…

General Issues.

Toddler’s Needs will now always be refilled while they’re at daycare.

Exterior trim now correctly applies to rounded flat blocks.

Adult Sims will now be able to successfully put Toddlers to bed. I wonder what their secret is. I may need to tap them for tips.

Sims on fire are now able to safely extinguish themselves in a pool. That’s refreshing.

The Dizzy Palms Ceiling Fan’s blades now tilt in the right direction.

Toddlers will no longer be put down from the high chair before they’ve finished eating. Patience mama, they’re still learning.

Gender Preference now affects flirt options.

Teen Sims will no longer spin into their Everyday outfit when going to school. If Randy wants to wear his swim trunks to school, well that’s Randy’s business.

Flirting with another Sim in a group conversation no longer increases the entire group’s Romance with you. That was awkward.

NPC Invites for Talent Showcase and Lounge will now take you to the appropriate venue.

We have fixed that bizarre issue where you’d have your Sims travel home, and then you load into your home lot, and your Sim’s skewer thumbnails are all greyed out like they’re not there, but when you hover over the skewer it tells you your Sims are at home. But like, they’re not at home. You’re staring at this empty lot, unable to play your Sims and you’re like.. “Is this even my home?”. And you start to question whether you selected the right lot on the map, but then you’re like “Wait, yeah - this is totally my home. But where are my Sims? It’s telling me they’re at home, but they’re not here.” Anyway, this should be fixed now.

Ghosts will no longer be obsessively calling you 5-ish times a day to see if you want to come over and hang out. They’ve been working on their self-control and are limited to at most one call per day now.

Terrain Paint now functions properly on Laptop Mode for AMD graphics cards.

NPC Sims will no longer get a sudden need to get nude after waking up if they have traveled off-lot and returned while you are visiting them. This one was weird. I wish I could show you the bug video.

Get Famous

We’ve toned down the amount of excitement that occurs when a celebrity makes an appearance outside of Del Sol Valley. They should be showing up outside of Del Sol Valley less often as well, so that should cut down on the ruckus.

It was a setup! I’ve been framed! It wasn’t me, I swear! You’ll pay for this! You got the wrong guy, it was Wilma! Wilma, I tell you! Celebrity Sims will no longer be falsely accused of stealing things. And for Wilma’s sake, I hope they get over what happened in the past.

Captain Sigma’s Gig costume no longer includes a chicken mask. That was a fowl fashion choice.

Performing “Tell a Group Story” Interaction Goals will now complete for the Fan Meet & Greet Event.

We fixed the issue with Del Sol Valley’s terrain disappearing when View Distance was set to High. Graphics cards (that we know of) that were affected by the issue:

Intel HD Graphics 3000

Intel HD Graphics 4000

AMD Radeon R6 Graphics

ATI Mobility Radeon HD 5145

NVIDIA GT 120

We fixed the Del Sol Valley skyline texture glitch after exiting CAS.

Elder Sims will no longer have the option to retire from the Acting Career, just to be met with a sad, sad reality. Before they were taunted with a TNS telling them they got this big great pension and now they can sit back and relax, but the pension amount was §0. That’s just so dark…

Seasons

Now, if you travel during a holiday, the holiday decorations on your neighbor’s homes will be removed after the holiday ends. They were admittedly being either a bit overly festive or just a tad lazy. Either way, it’s been dealt with.

Sims will no longer gluttonously guzzle/gulp/slurp/chug water/milk/orange juice during events. No need to be so shellfish.

Jogging Vampires will no longer hold an umbrella while jogging because that’s just silly.

Coffee and Tea is safe to drink again. Sims will no longer receive the “Lethal Heat” buff and die upon returning home after drinking three hot beverages.

Cats & Dogs

Strays can now eat and use litter boxes without having to make the lot a Cat Hangout. You poor poor babies. You’re safe now.

Existing Sims/Saves will once again be able to lecture their pets. Now you can let Biscuit know how you truly feel when she jumps up on the counter.

It’s been ongoing, but we are actively calming those overly excited pets. Your queue should no longer fill up with a stack of a zillion bubbles from your pets when you run certain interactions. We’ve been working on this issue for a while with a few other fixes, but it’s been rearing its head with new repro steps here and there. So hopefully this fish sticks.

Having a puppy or kitten nearby will no longer interrupt your Sim’s bath or shower. We swear they weren’t doing that on porpoise.

Sims are now able to walk through doors with Country Curtains.

City Living

Building pieces in apartments will no longer be invisible when viewing from the upper floor. That must have been very disconcerting to not know what happened to your stuff.

Cleared out some pesky extra plants floating around the Romance Festival.

Your Sims should now be able to buy art from the Street Gallery object during a Yard Sale.

Oh this one’s a doozy. Get this: Talking John and Potty Mouth 2.0 toilets no longer play their sound on an endless loop when a child Sim runs the Use & Massage interaction, even after the toilet is destroyed. Bonus points to SimGuruJill for keeping a straight face writing that one.

Foundations will no longer cut out the floor of a Penthouse.

Get Together

Empty Clubs will no longer linger in your Clubs Panel. They are now self-aware enough to know when the party’s over and it is time to go home.

Get To Work

Coworkers are now spawning for the Science career. Yes, they missed you too.

Breast Feed is no longer available for male Sim parents of non-alien babies. Only alien spawn possess the cosmic knowledge of the most nourishing MANaries.

Strangerville

We fixed some buggy dog-walking behavior in Strangerville.

We shortened up the time it takes to complete the Give Orders Daily Task in the Courageous Captain Rank of the Officer Branch of the Military Career. That was a mouthful.

Jungle Adventure

You will no longer receive countless notifications when you leave your kitten or puppy at home while vacationing in Selvadorada.

Vampires

Vampire Sims will now once again gain points after they reach the Grandmaster level on pre-April (2019) patch saves.

Your Vampires will no longer be unrightfully chastised by NPCs for drinking their blood after they specifically asked if it was ok. Like, I’m trying to be polite here and you said it was fine, and now you’re like all bent about it… what gives?

Perfect Sun Resistance Vampires will no longer use umbrellas when routing in the sun. Flaunt it, baby.

We fixed the weirdness with trying to add points while drinking the Draught of Reconfiguration. Now you should be able to add points just fine and your options won’t be greyed out.

Cured Vampires will now change body temperature. Why you gotta be so cold?

Laundry Day

Sims will now hold laundry bags the right way. What is the right way, you ask? Trust me, it’s better than how they were holding it before.

And now to wrap it all up, let’s get playing! I hope you enjoy your summer updates and have yourself one wonderful day today.

Stay Cheesy,

-SimGuruJill

[bluewatsons]

Elaine Hatfield & Richard L. Rapson, Culture and Passionate Love, in F. Deutsch, M. Boehnke, U. Kühnen, & K. Boehnke (Eds.), Rendering borders obsolete: Cross-cultural and cultural psychology as an interdisciplinary, multi-method endeavor: Proceedings from the 19th International Congress of the International Association for Cross-Cultural Psychology (2011)

Abstract

For more than 4,000 years, poets and storytellers have sung of the delights and sufferings of love and lust. This chapter reviews what scholars from various disciplines have discovered about the nature of passionate love and sexual desire. Anthropologists and evolutionary psychologists have assumed that passionate love is a cultural universal. Cultural researchers, historians, and social psychologists have emphasized the stunning diversity in the way passionate love and sexual desire have been viewed and experienced. Culture, ethnicity and the rules passed down by political and religious authorities have a profound impact on the way people think about and act out love and sex. Marriage for love and sex for pleasure have always been deeply threatening to political and religious leaders who have feared the individualistic implications of permissive approaches to romance and passion. Individualism and personal choice are seen as the enemies of order and authority; such freedom are deemed heretical, sinful, dangerous, and an invitation to chaos, selfishness, and anarchy. The fight over the rules governing love, marriage, divorce, and sex stands as one of history’s central and most powerful themes. Today, however, in the era of widespread travel, global capitalism, and the World Wide Web, many of these traditional cross-cultural differences seem to be disappearing. Authority is giving way nearly everywhere to increased freedom, particularly in the personal realm, in the world of passion. Is the erosion of traditional authority and strict personal rules really happening—and if so what does that portend for personal and societal futures?

In all cultures, men and women feel the stirrings of passionate love and sexual desire. Yet despite its universality, culture has been found to have a profound impact on people’s definitions of passionate love and on the way they think, feel, and behave when faced with appropriate partners in settings designed to spark such feelings. Cross-cultural studies provide a glimpse into the complex world of passionate love and increase our understanding of the extent to which people’s emotional lives are written in their cultural and personal histories, as well as “writ in their genes.”

Defining Passionate Love

The Sufi poet Jelaluddin Rumi, who was born in Afghanistan in 1207 A.D., contended, “whoever has been taught the secrets of love is sworn to silence with lips sealed.” Nonetheless, Rumi penned ecstatic missives celebrating the glories of love (Mathnavi and Diwan-I-Shams). In this snippet, he rhapsodizes:

With love, bitter turns into sweetness. With love, dregs turn into honey. . .

With love, thorns become flowers. With love, vinegar becomes wine. . . .

With love, misery turns into happiness.

In all cultures, people distinguish between two kinds of love: “passionate love” and “companionate love.” Passionate love (sometimes called “obsessive love,” “infatuation,” “lovesickness,” or “being-in-love”) is the variety of love with which we will be concerned in this paper. We will not discuss companionate love, a deeper, more intimate, and longer lasting variety of love and friendship.

Passionate love is a powerful emotional state. It has been defined as:

A state of intense longing for union with another. Passionate love is a complex functional whole including appraisals or appreciations, subjective feelings, expressions, patterned physiological processes, action tendencies, and instrumental behaviors. Reciprocated love (union with the other) is associated with fulfillment and ecstasy. Unrequited love (separation) is associated with feelings of emptiness, anxiety, and despair (Hatfield & Rapson, 2005, p. 71).

The Passionate Love Scale (PLS) was designed to tap into the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral indicants of such longings (Hatfield & Sprecher, 1986). The PLS has been translated and utilized by researchers in Germany, India, Indonesia, Iran, Italy, Japan, Korea, Peru, Poland, Spain, Sweden, and Switzerland. The PLS has been found to be a useful measure of passionate love with men and women of all ages, in a variety of cultures, and has been found to correlate well with certain well-defined patterns of neural activation (see Bartels & Zeki, 2000; Fisher, 2004; Hatfield, Rapson, & Martel, 2007; Hatfield & Rapson, 2009; Landis & O’Shea, 2000).

Theoretical Understandings of Passionate Love

Passionate Love: A Cultural Universal

Passionate love is as old as humankind. Love poems have been discovered on the outskirts of the Valley of Kings. Written during Egypt’s New Kingdom (1539-1075 B.C.E.) but surely composed much earlier, these songs (recorded on cuneiform tablets) speak to lovers today. Consider this fragment:

The Flower Song

To hear your voice is pomegranate wine to me.

I draw life from hearing it. Could I see you with every glance, It would be better for me Than to eat or drink.2

Today, most cultural theorists consider passionate love to be a universal emotion, transcending culture and time (Hatfield & Rapson, 2005; Jankowiak, 1995; Tooby & Cosmides, 1992). Jankowiak and Fischer (1992), for example, drew a sharp distinction between “romantic passion” and “simple lust.” They proposed that both passion and lust are universal feelings. Drawing on a sampling of tribal societies from the Standard Cross-Cultural Sample, they found that in almost all of these far-flung societies, young lovers talked about passionate love, recounted tales of love, sang love songs, and spoke of the longings and anguish of infatuation. When passionate affections clashed with parents’ or elders’ wishes, young couples often eloped. Cultural anthropologists have recorded folk conceptions of love in such diverse cultures as Indonesia, Morocco, Nigeria, the Fulbe of North Cameroun, the People’s Republic of China, Trinidad, Turkey, the Mangrove (an aboriginal Australian community), the Mangaia in the Cook Islands, Palau in Micronesia, and the Taita of Kenya (see Jankowiak, 1995, for a review of this research). A number of studies document that in both tribal and modern societies, people’s conceptions of passionate love are surprisingly similar (Neto et al., 2000).

Passionate Love: Cultural Differences

Americans are preoccupied with love—or so cross-cultural observers once claimed. In a famous quip, Linton (1936) mocked Americans for their naïve idealization of romantic love and their assumption that romantic love is a prerequisite for marriage:

All societies recognize that there are occasional violent, emotional attachments between persons of opposite sex, but our present American culture is practically the only one which has attempted to capitalize these, and make them the basis for marriage. . . . The hero of the modern American movie is always a romantic lover, just as the hero of the old Arab epic is always an epileptic. A cynic may suspect that in any ordinary population the percentage of individuals with a capacity for romantic love of the Hollywood type was about as large as that of persons able to throw genuine epileptic fits. (p. 175)

Throughout the world, a spate of commentators once echoed Linton’s claim that the idealization of passionate love is a peculiarly Western institution.

Background. The world’s cultures differ profoundly in the extent to which they emphasize individualism or collectivism (although many cultural researchers focus on related concepts such as independence vs. interdependence, modernism vs. traditionalism, urbanism vs. ruralism, affluence vs. poverty, or a family focus vs. an individualistic focus). Individualistic cultures such as the United States, Britain, Australia, Canada, and the countries of Northern and Western Europe tend to focus on personal goals. Collectivist cultures such as China, many African and Latin American nations, Greece, southern Italy, and the Pacific Islands, on the other hand, press their members to subordinate their personal interests to those of the group (Markus & Kitayama, 1991; Triandis, McCusker, & Hui, 1990). Triandis and his colleagues point out that in individualistic cultures, young people are allowed to “do their own thing.” In collectivist cultures, the group comes first.

Hsu (1953, 1985) and Doi (1963, 1973) contended that passionate love is a Western phenomenon, virtually unknown in China and Japan, and so incompatible with Asian values and customs that it is unlikely ever to gain a foothold among young Asians. Hsu (1953) wrote: “An American asks, ‘How does my heart feel?’ A Chinese asks, ‘What will other people say?’” (p. 50). Hsu pointed out that the Chinese generally use the term “love” to describe not a respectable, socially sanctioned relationship, but an illicit liaison between a man and a woman. Chu (1985; Chu & Ju, 1993) also argued that although romantic love and compatibility are of paramount importance in mate selection in America, in China such feelings matter little. Traditionally, parents and go-betweens arranged young peoples’ marriages. Parents’ primary concern was not love and compatibility but men dang hu dui. Do the families possess the same social status? Are they compatible? Will the marriage bring some social or financial advantage to the two families? (A note: Later in this chapter, we will discuss the fact that since the 1950s, in the wake of globalization, Chinese attitudes and values have begun to undergo revolutionary changes.)

On the basis of such testimony, cross-cultural researchers once contended that romantic love is common only in modern, industrialized countries. It should be less valued in traditional cultures with strong, extended family ties (Simmons, Vom Kolke, & Shimizu, 1986). It should also be more common in modern, industrialized countries than in developing countries (Goode, 1959; Rosenblatt, 1967). In recent years, cultural researchers have begun to test these provocative hypotheses.

Recent Research on Culture and Passionate Love

Recently, cultural researchers have begun to investigate the impact of culture on people’s definitions of love, what people desire in romantic partners, their likelihood of falling in love, the intensity of their passion, and their willingness to acquiesce in arranged marriages versus insisting on marrying for love. From this preliminary research it appears that, although a few cultural differences do in fact exist, cultures frequently turn out to be more similar in their profoundest of feelings than one might expect. Let us now turn to this research.

The Meaning of Passionate Love

Shaver, Wu, and Schwartz (1991) interviewed young people in America, Italy, and the People’s Republic of China about the way they viewed love. They found that Americans and Italians tended to equate love with happiness and to assume that both passionate and companionate love were intensely pleasurable experiences. Students in Beijing, China, possessed a darker view of love. In the Chinese language, there are few “happy-love” words; love is associated with sadness. Not surprisingly, then, the Chinese men and women interviewed by Shaver and his colleagues tended to associate passionate love with ideographic words such as infatuation, unrequited love, nostalgia, and sorrow love. Other cultural researchers agree that cultural values may, indeed, have a profound impact on the subtle shadings of meaning assigned to the construct of “love” (Cohen, 2001; Kim & Hatfield, 2004; Kitayama, 2002; Luciano, 2003; Nisbet, 2003; Oyserman, Kemmelmeier, & Coon, 2002; Weaver & Ganong, 2004). A few cultural researchers argue, for example, that romantic love is more important in modern, industrialized, individualistic cultures (Levine et al., 1995), in Latin cultures (Ferrer Pérez et al., 2008), and in European cultures than in Asian or Indian samples (Simmons et al., 1986, 1988; Medora et al., 2002), or in societies where men and women possess sexual equality (DeMunck & Korotayev, 1999).

There is, however, considerable debate as to how important such differences are. When social psychologists explored folk conceptions of love in a variety of cultures—including the People’s Republic of China, Indonesia, Micronesia, Palau, and Turkey, as well as a variety of other nations—they concluded that people in the various cultures possessed surprisingly similar views of love and other “feelings of the heart” (for a review of this research, see Contreas et al., 1996; Fischer, Wang, Kennedy, & Cheng, 1998; Jankowiak, 1995; Kim & Hatfield, 2004; Shaver, Murdaya, & Fraley, 2001; Xu et al., 2008). In a typical study, for example, Shaver and his colleagues (2001) argued that love and sexual mating, reproduction, and parenting are fundamental issues for all humans (pp. 219-220). To test the notion that passionate and companionate love are cultural universals, they conducted a “prototype” study to determine (1) what Indonesian (compared to American) men and women considered to be “basic” emotions, and (2) the meaning they ascribed to these emotions. Starting with 404 Indonesian perasaan hati (emotion names or “feelings of the heart”) they asked people to sort the words into basic emotion categories. As predicted, the Indonesians came up with the same five emotions that Americans consider to be basic: joy, love, sadness, fear, and anger. Furthermore, when asked about the meanings of “love,” Indonesian men and women (like their American counterparts) were able to distinguish passionate love (asmara, or sexual/desire/arousal) from companionate love (cinta, or affection/liking/fondness). There were a few differences in the American and Indonesian lexicons, however:

The Indonesian conception of love may place more emphasis on yearning and desire than the American conception, perhaps because the barriers to consummation are more formidable in Indonesia, which is a more traditional and mostly Muslim country (p. 219).

Why are these diverse societies so similar in their views of love? Perhaps love is indeed a cultural universal. Or perhaps the times they are “a-changin’”. One impact of globalization (and the ubiquitous MTV, Hollywood and Bollywood movies, chat rooms, and foreign travel) may be to ensure that when people throughout the world speak of “passionate love,” they may well be talking about much the same thing. We would argue that culture and historical pressures produce visions of passionate love that are variations on a theme. Shading, melody, and tempo may vary with culture, but the underlying architecture of the mind may remain the same. Cultural traditions and values may affect romantic visions, how one describes one’s feelings when in love, how demonstrative people are in displaying their love, but the fact of passionate love may indeed be a cultural universal based on similarities in the architecture of the mind and a common neural substrate (Aron et al., 2008; Xu et al., 2008).

The Likelihood of Being in Love

Sprecher and her colleagues (1994) interviewed 1,667 men and women in the United States, Russia, and Japan. Based on notions of individualism versus collectivism, the authors predicted that whereas American men and women would be most vulnerable to love, the Japanese would be the least likely to be “love besotted.” The authors found that they were wrong. In fact, 59% of American college students, 67% of Russians, and 53% of Japanese students said they were in love at the time of the interview. In all three cultures, men were slightly less likely than women to be in love. (In America, 53% of men and 63% of women; in Russia, 61% of men and 71% of women; and in Japan, 41% of men and 63% of women indicated they were currently in love.) There was no evidence, however, that individualistic cultures breed young men and women who are more love struck than do collectivist societies.

Surveys of Mexican-American, Chinese-American, and European-American students have revealed that in a variety of ethnic groups, young men and women show similarly high rates of “being in love” at the present time (Aron & Rodriguez, 1992; Doherty et al., 1994; Hatfield & Rapson, 2005).

The Intensity of Passionate Love

Cultures also seem to share more similarities than differences in the intensity of passionate love that people experience. In one study, Hatfield and Rapson (2005) asked men and women of European, Filipino, and Japanese ancestry to complete the PLS. To their surprise, they found that men and women from the various ethnic groups seemed to love with equal passion. (In the following table 1, none of the ethnic group differences nor any of the gender x ethnic group differences were significant.)

Table 1. PLS Scores of Various Ethnic Groups

Hatfield and Rapson’s (2005) results were confirmed in a study done by Doherty and his colleagues (1994) with European-Americans, Chinese-Americans, Filipino-Americans, Japanese- Americans, and Pacific Islanders.

After viewing the preceding results, some cultural researchers observed: “True, people might fall in love, but they don’t expect to have these desires indulged. When it comes to marriage, in family focused societies people sacrifice their own desires, and accede to the wishes of parents, authorities, and friends.”

To test this notion, Sprecher and her colleagues (1994), asked American, Russian, and Japanese students: “If a person had all the other qualities you desired, would you marry him or her if you were not in love?” (Students could answer only “yes” or “no.”) The authors assumed that only Americans would demand love and marriage; they predicted that both the Russians and the Japanese would be more practical. They were wrong! Both the Americans and the Japanese were romantics. Few of them would consider marrying someone they did not love (only 11% of Americans and 18% of the Japanese said “yes”). The Russians were more practical; 37% said they would accept such a proposal. (These ethnic group differences were significant at the p < .001 level.) Russian men were only slightly more practical than men in other countries. It was the Russian women who were most likely to “settle.” (This gender difference was significant at p < .05).

Despite the larger proportion of Russian women willing to enter a loveless marriage, a large majority of individuals in the three cultures would refuse to marry someone they did not love (see Table 2).

Table 2. Would You Marry Someone You Did Not Love?

For additional information on culture, love and sex, see Boratav (2008); Gabreyna (2008); Gabrenya & Fehir, 2008; Levine et al., 1995; Ryder, Pfaus & Brotto (2008); Schmitz (2008)— several of whose work are represented in this volume.

In Conclusion

The preceding studies, then, suggest that (in the area of passionate love and sexual desire) the large differences that once existed between Westernized, modern, urban, industrial societies and Eastern, modern, urban industrial societies may be fast disappearing. Those interested in cross-cultural differences may be forced to search for large differences in only the most underdeveloped, developing, and collectivist of societies—such as in Africa or Latin America, in China or the Arab countries (Egypt, Kuwait, Lebanon, Libya, Saudi-Arabia, Iraq, or the United Arab Emirates).

However, it may well be that even there, the winds of Westernization, individualism, and social change are blowing. In spite of the censure of their elders, in a variety of traditional cultures, young people are increasingly adopting “Western” patterns—placing a high value on falling in love, pressing for gender equality in love and sex, and insisting on marrying for love (as opposed to arranged marriages). Such changes have been documented in Finland, Estonia, and Russia (Haavio-Mannila, & Kontula, 2003) as well as among Australian aboriginal people of Mangrove and a Copper Inuit Alaskan Indian tribe (see Jankowiak, 1995, for an extensive review of this research).

Naturally, cultural differences still exert a profound influence on young people’s attitudes, emotions, and behavior, and such differences are not likely to disappear in our lifetime. In Morocco, for example, marriage was once an alliance between families (as historically it was in most of the world before the 18th century), in which children had little or no say. Today, although parents can no longer simply dictate whom their children will marry, parental approval remains critically important. It is important, however, that young men and women are at least allowed to have their say (see Davis & Davis, 1995).

Many have observed that, today, two powerful forces—globalization and cultural pride/identification with one’s country (what historians call “nationalism”)—are contending for men’s and women’s souls. To some extent, the world’s citizens may be becoming one but in truth the delightful and divisive cultural variations that have made our world such an interesting (and simultaneously dangerous) place, are likely to add spice to that heady brew of love and sexual practices for some time to come. The convergence of cultures around the world may be reducing the differences in the ways passionate love is experienced and expressed in the modern era, but tradition can be tenacious, and the global future of passionate love cannot be predicted with any certainty.

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Schmitz, P. G. (2008, July). Dimensions of love and sexual behavior: The influence of culture and personality factors. Paper presented at the XIXth International Congress of the International Association for Cross-Cultural Psychology, Bremen, Germany.

Shaver, P. R., Murdaya, U., & Fraley, R. C. (2001). Structure of the Indonesian emotion lexicon. Asian Journal of Social Psychology, 4, 201-224.

Shaver, P. R., Wu, S., & Schwartz, J. C. (1991). Cross-cultural similarities and differences in emotion and its representation: A prototype approach. In M. S. Clark (Ed.), Review of Personality and Social Psychology (Vol.13) (pp. 175-212). Newbury Park, CA: Sage.

Simmons, C. H., Vom Kolke, A., & Shimizu, H. (1986). Attitudes toward romantic love among American, German, and Japanese students. Journal of Social Psychology, 126, 327-337.

Simmons, C. H., Wehner, E. A., & Kay, K. A. (1988). Differences in attitudes toward romantic love of French and American students. The Journal of Social Psychology, 129, 793-799.

Sprecher, S., Aron, A., Hatfield, E., Cortese, A., Potapova, E., & Levitskaya, A. (1994). Love: American style, Russian style, and Japanese style. Personal Relationships, 1, 349-369.

Tooby, J., & Cosmides, L. (1992). The evolutionary and psychological foundations of the social sciences. In J. H. Barkow, L. Cosmides & J. Tooby (Eds.), The adapted mind: Evolutionary psychology and the generation of culture (pp. 19-136). New York: Oxford University Press.

Triandis, H. C., McCusker, C., & Hui, C. H. (1990). Multimethod probes of individualism and collectivism. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 59, 1006-1020.

Weaver, S. E., & Ganong, L. W. (2004). The factor structure of the Romantic Belief Scale for African Americans and European Americans. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 21, 171-185.

Xu, X., Aron, A., Cao, G., Feng, T., Fisher, H., Brown, L., & Weng, X. (2008). The universality of love and neural correlates of relational outcomes: an fMRI study of intense romantic love in China with follow-up relational data. Talk presented at the biannual meeting of the International Association of Relationship Research, Providence, RI.

[itsawonderfullifewithz]

Songs of Summer 2018

To The Movies

For our family, the unofficial start of the summer began when Avengers: Infinity War came out in late April. With the exception of the first Ant-man movie (which Z. really enjoyed), Z had been a casual MCU fan, watching snippets of whatever was playing on FX.

Despite it’s dark ending, we both enjoyed the movie. For me, I enjoyed it so much that I decided that this would be Xavier’s first theatrical experience.

Full disclosure: I know that Avengers: Infinity War isn’t the most appropriate for a 4 year-old. But, I want my son’s first theatrical experience to not just be an enjoyable movie, but to also be a pop culture touchstone. Originally, I had planned on Xavier’s first experience in the theater to be Star Wars: The Last Jedi. While Star Wars is and always will be a cultural touchstone, The Last Jedi has been the most divisive film among the broad Star Wars fan base. I can’t have my son’s first movie be controversial.

So a few days after our first viewing of Avengers: Infinity War, we took Xavier. As expected, he was frightened at some scenes--he covered his eyes at the beginning when Thanos appears. He got some enjoyment once Iron Man, Dr. Strange and Spider-Man show up but fell asleep at the halfway point and woke up at the credits.I know that Infinity War will be watched on an annual basis (Xavier and I watched it again once it came out on Bluray) and hopefully he’ll grow a special attachment to the movie as he gets older.

Not that we were finished with the MCU, since the next movie we saw was Ant-Man and The Wasp. We brought along Xavier (again he fell asleep halfway through). The movie was a welcomed delight, lighthearted and fun after the dark conclusion of Infinity War. Z., however, needs to see it again since she had to go to the bathroom during Luis’ monologue sequence.

The Spy Who Dumped Me was our next movie. No Xavier this time since it’s Rated R. While I enjoyed some parts of it, I don’t think it’s the best of the Spy Parody subgenre--Spy with Melissa McCarthy, the first Austin Powers movie and the Kingsman series do it better.  

Z knew I wouldn’t enjoy her next choice: Crazy Rich Asians. I knew she was interested after seeing the trailer, so I braced myself for the trip to the theater. But, she was very considerate and let me off the hook. She went solo while Xavier and I stayed at home. I’m glad Z. went and saw the movie though. Even though I didn’t go, I’m glad one of us contributed to its box office success, since it’s the first movie with an all Asian cast that had a nationwide theatrical release since The Joy Luck Club in 1993. Representation is great. We just need more Asians in Avengers in addition to Dr. Strange’s sidekick, Wong.  

Cedar Point

Aside from the scare that we had with Xavier, the Cedar Point trip was a blast. The last time Z and I went there was during Halloween in 2013, where we visited the haunted attractions. We watched Xavier hop on the kiddie rides and strolled around the park.

As for myself, I got to ride a roller coaster--something I hadn’t done in twenty years. I had to ride it myself, since my tactics of persuasion on Z. were futile. The Gemini--a wooden roller coaster with dual tracks--was the only choice since it was near closing time. It was a rougher ride than I had remembered it when I was a teenager. Then, at the end of the ride, there was a malfunction, leaving about twelve of us stuck on the track. The attendants weren’t able to get the ride moving again, so we all had to get out and walk on the tracks to the exit. We were only about fifty feet from the ground, so if I fell I’d only suffer from a few broken bones, but what do you expect from a 40 year-old roller coaster?

Weezer

On the weekend of my birthday, Z. and I drove up to Clarkson to the DTE Energy Theater. Last year, Z. picked Coldplay for our summer concert, this year I chose Weezer. Like I said back in February, my fandom for Weezer had been rekindled.

We missed the opening band: the Wombats, which is okay since I only knew one song by them “Let’s Dance to Joy Division.”

We arrived in time to watch The Pixies--they opened with their most famous song Where is My Mind. Gigantic, Wave of Mutilation were also played but they did not play Here Comes Your Man--the only song Z. likes. The Pixies are much like Pearl Jam, where their setlist varies from show to show.

Then came Weezer. They opened up with Buddy Holly and followed it up with more classics from the Blue album, a couple of songs from Pinkerton, a couple of songs from the Green Album, one from the Red Album (Pork and Beans), and one from Raditude (If You’re Wondering If you Want Me To). About halfway through their set, they did a couple of covers: Take on Me by Ah-Ha and Africa by Toto. These covers were the highlight for Z. I think she prefers Weezer as a cover band. Sacrilege.

Food Trips

Z. and I enjoy Ann Arbor during the summer the most since Downtown isn’t swarming with U of M students. This is our time to enjoy the many dining selections we miss since parking can be a pain. This year, in addition to our trips to NYPD pizza and Blimpy’s, we went to Blue Tracker--a bbq joint and  El Tacoreia.

And of course, the summer wouldn’t be complete without a visit to Culver’s. 

Makers Faire @ Henry Ford Museum

My cousin, his girlfriend and her daughter invited us to the Maker’s Fair at the Henry Ford Museum.

The Maker’s fair is basically a “Show and Tell” event held at the Henry Ford Museum, for hobbyists and creators to showcase their work. I hadn’t been to the Henry Ford Museum since I was a kid. I just remember the vintage cars and WWII planes hanging from the ceiling. The Maker’s faire added a lot more to see at the museum. There were plenty of robots, which Xavier enjoys and surprisingly, plenty of Star Wars stuff. It seemed more like a comic book convention than anything else.

One thing that surprised me was they had a section where they featured old technology and the 90’s were included. Like I needed another reminder of my age. 

Funko Pop Collection

The Pop buying started last year when I bought one for Z--The Annabelle doll. But then, Annabelle seemed lonely so I bought Carrie, drenched in the pig’s blood, for myself. It was never meant to be a collection. That all changed this past summer when in a span of three months our collection ballooned to over 100 different Pops.

Since then, we’ve adjusted our buying habits--only purchasing the ones we like and doing it together like another activity.

When we first got married, Z. and I brought up the idea of starting a toy collection. Now it’s coming to fruition.

[bunnybones]

1: Do you have a crush at the moment? it’s more than a crush but yeah

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? umm i really love this 1 person

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? 6 months

4: Have you ever changed for someone? yup

5: How is your relationship with your ex? we don’t talk

6: Have you ever been cheated on? no?

7: Have you ever cheated? nope

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating? FUCK NO

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship? honesty

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? i want a serious relationship but lately it’s been flings

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? yes

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with? none

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship? telling them i love them when i truly don’t

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? whatever is legal in their state i guess

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”? when both partners are over 18 it doesn’t matter

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”? that’s some fake ass shit

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? yeah

18: What do you consider a deal breaker? if they don’t eat pussy

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? when you both are fighting too much

20: Are you currently in a relationship? yes but he is not the one i love

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? idk i havent but maybe some ppl do

22: Do you think people should date their friends? if that’s what they wanna do

23: How many relationships have you had? its a secret

24: Do you think love can last forever? yeah probably

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things? i dunno

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? ummm no

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? don’t feel like u have to tell someone u love them back when u know damn well u don’t

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work? yup

29: What do you notice first about another person? eyes

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? bisexual

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness? no

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? yes

33: Do you want to get married one day? yes

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed? they can get my name but i wont get theirs

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex? no

36: Are you still a virgin? yes

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? personality

38: Do you enjoy love films? yes

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? once

40: Have you ever had a valentine? mhm ❤

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”? so I’ve always wanted to go hiking/camping so we can lay under the stars by a campfire and cuddle and all that cute stuff

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? no

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? idk

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? at times, yes

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends? no

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”? yes

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite? bob and linda belcher

48: What’s your favorite love song? pretty when i cry by lana del rey

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? YES

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are? n/a

[dyk3nukem]

all the vday asks

i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

i think so. 

3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?

2 years and counting!

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

I’m trying to unlearn some bad behavior, but that’s all!

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

w my first one: i hate him and he hates me but we’re civilw my second one: lmao we have each other blocked on instagram and she tried to send at least two diff people to guilttrip me about breaking up w her

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

i sure hope not!

7: Have you ever cheated?

nope!

8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?

i’d want to be just friends with them for a while first, so we could establish some healthy communication and security in the relationship, and then i’d see what i’d feel comfy with .

9: What's the most important part of a relationship?

communication!!! a relationship is nothing if you guys don’t talk to each other about your wants and needs!

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

serious relationships! one time i tried to have a fling but when i was about 2 do the succ he suggested we watch sword art online and i sent him home

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?

i think it can be a rly healthy thing for ppl to take a small break from being in a relationship! we all have our own burdens and issues, and sometimes we need to deal with those by ourselves, and that’s okay! 

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

lmao no

13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

i regret the entirety of both my relationships previous to this one tbh? my first bf i only went out with bc we were best friends and i didn’t want to lose him, but i was not at all ready to have a boyfriend. w my girlfriend, i just...yikes lol that was a bad time

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

like 15 or 16 i guess? 

15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?

i’ve only heard ppl say that when they’re being p*dophiles so like... no

16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?

not rly tbh

17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?

not personally, but if other ppl can, thats rly cute and i support them!

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

cheating, not respecting physical/emotional boundaries, murder probably

19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?

i ended my last one bc she crossed physical boundaries so like? other than that idk

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

i think so! 

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

yeah!! all of my partners have been friends! its a solid foundation for a relationship

23: How many relationships have you had?

3

24: Do you think love can last forever?

i think love starts as a feeling and stays as a choice. it doesnt always feel the same, but it grows with you, so it changes as you (and your partner/s) change!

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

its a pretty thought!

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?

LMAO no way!! my mom hates my partner but i hate my mom so she can suck it

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

Don’t date someone just because you’re expected to! Wait until you’re ready!

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

of course! they’re hard as fuck, but it can work!

29: What do you notice first about another person?

their walk, how they stand, speech patterns

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

We Just Dont Know!

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

of course not! i’d be highkey hypocritical

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

yup! it sucked hella!

33: Do you want to get married one day?

i think it sounds lovely! it’s gonna take me a few years to get fully comfortable with the idea (my parents r divorced, i’ve been engaged, so it’s made me a little skittish) but i think eventually, being married would be sublime

34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?

i personally wouldn’t do it, but if other ppl want to i think its rly cute

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

totes!

36: Are you still a virgin?

We Just Dont Know!

37: What's more important: Looks or personality?

Personality!

38: Do you enjoy love films?

tbh they only serve to make my heart ache

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! my partner has rose bushes all over their house and in the summer they give me roses and it’s the sweetest thing and i’ve saved all but one of them

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

my partner’s cat!

41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?

they take me to an art museum, we hold hands and whisper jokes to each other. they take pictures of me while i’m not looking; i return the favor. we kiss on the bus ride home and we’re in love.

42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?

yREAHBOY HOWDY HAVE I 

43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?

i consider my partner a friend, so, both!

44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?

if u do an xray, u find me 2 be filled with pablo neruda sonnets

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?

nah thats a stupid concept

47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?

that super gay king and his boyfriend what were their names?

48: What's your favorite love song?

oh i love so many,, The Way I Am by ingrid michaelson?

49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?

yeah probs

50: If you're single, why do you think you are?

i’m not :D 

51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?

depends on how horny i am (nice guy)

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

a little bit, ya! i think

53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?

nah

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?

For me, its like? 6/10? 

55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?

yeah i’m trying to work on it but im,,,, really fucking clingy

56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?

i dont think so

57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?

No reason to consider suicide is a silly reason! Emotions are hella fucking hard to handle, and it doesn’t help when you  invalidate the people experiencing them.

58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?

okay everyone fucking thinks my boyfriend tops but I’M THE TOP YOU GUYS

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?

nope!

60: What's your opinion on open relationships?

I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable in one, but I think they’re a healthy way to experience love!

61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?

Depends on the issue I guess? 

62: How do you define "cheating"?

If they do anything w/ romantic/sexual intent without clearing it w me first

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

Nope! Jerkin it is fun

64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?

It’s capitalism but also i love roses

65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?

yEAH holy shit yall i used to be so fuckin touch repulsed but now i die every time i’m not being held

#bunny mumbles

[slipperysoap]

do em all

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?four actually *blows kisses*2: Have you ever been deeply in love?mmm yeah3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?just over a year i believe4: Have you ever changed for someone?dude my main personality trait is changing for people. im a human chameleon on this bitch of an earth5: How is your relationship with your ex?a lot smoother than it was when we were actually dating funnily enough6: Have you ever been cheated on?nah7: Have you ever cheated?Nah8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?NAH9: What's the most important part of a relationship?you gotta Like each other. its really easy to tell yourself you love someone and its easier to lust after someone but you have to Like them if youre going to be able to healthily make things work with them10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?both. i just like to love people11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?if theyre necessary12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?like...... hooked up or Hooked Up13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?despite loving the shit out of love ive got a bad track record of being too distant at times. its not always something i can help but its something always something i feel guilty about 14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?im a kid. this question is fixed.15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?depends on what situation its being applied to16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?i definitely believe in lust at first sight but how do you love someone without knowing anything about them??17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?if i can do it anyone can18: What do you consider a deal breaker?chewing with your fuckn mouth open. you can be perfect but i swear if u make me look at your chewed up dinner i Will puke on you and leave19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?youre not happy in it anymore20: Are you currently in a relationship?nah21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?uh huh honey22: Do you think people should date their friends?not if they dont want to???23: How many relationships have you had?f??????ive?? mostly unimpressive relationships24: Do you think love can last forever?i dont see why it couldnt in the right conditions25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?love can conquer Most things26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?scoff27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?'please for the love of god just stop being a little bitch to people you like'28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?yeah but boy it aint easy. kudos to those loving and living apart and making it work29: What do you notice first about another person?kindve depends on the situation huh30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?pan on the reg baybee31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?no?? 32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?if so i was never told about it33: Do you want to get married one day?maybe? i mean. it used to seem like a pretty hot idea but now its just. youd better be pretty special if you expect a yes to your proposal34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?i think wed better be together for at least twenty years first because otherwise i cant risk anything35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?sure36: Are you still a virgin?tee hee37: What's more important: Looks or personality?both are equally important and anyone who says differently is a lying bitch38: Do you enjoy love films?some, but not really39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?no but wow do i deserve roses40: Have you ever had a valentine?yeah baby41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?watching movies and sleeping. mmmm.42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?yessir43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?my friends oops44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?like..... low key. low key.45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?Could i? ye. Would i?  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?thatd imply me trying to make a move. unlikely.47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?whos even dating who right now48: What's your favorite love song?me, going through my Love mix: inconclusive.49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?maybe! maybe.50: If you're single, why do you think you are?my face looks like a drowned sewer rat and im a bitch whenever i have a crush on someone51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?date the rich guy. marry the rich guy. spend years loyal to his side. kill him and steal his riches in the middle of the night. find my poor love and take them into luxury52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?i can definitely give it. whether its actually applicable is debatable53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?nah. theyre just getting theirs honey54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?0% important55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?not really?56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?no who has the energy57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?i considered suicide when i spilled pop on myself there Are sillier reasons out there than genuine emotional pain58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?depends on the relationship i guess59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?yeah but thats just me baby. i barely know My birthday60: What's your opinion on open relationships?if theyre working out then good for them i guess?61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?me62: How do you define "cheating"?doing things typically reserved for your s/o with? other people??63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?no watch porn use vibes get freaky on your own time64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?a Little but like. i still soak it up every year and come back stronger each time65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?Yes

[mite75]

all of the valentines asks!!! I'm so nosey!

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?: no and idk I'm thinking about keeping it that way for a while unless someone for sure likes me and wants to date.2: Have you ever been deeply in love?: nope3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?: 2 months ^^;4: Have you ever changed for someone?: yup5: How is your relationship with your ex?: bad and ehh6: Have you ever been cheated on?: no dont think so7: Have you ever cheated?: NO8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?: depends on our relationship. but there would be no slack if i even suspected of cheating it might be the end of the relationship and possibly friendship depending on how they act after.9: What's the most important part of a relationship?: trust communication and enjoying being together10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?: i want to be in a serious relationship. i always want to give space at first tho. if in the first few weeks/ month or 2 we see we’re not right for each other that’s chill, we break up no hard feelings anywhere. but like after that i prob really consider it at least pretty serious.11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?: depends. if it’s like alone time or days yea!! but if it’s like entire weeks/months?? and they happen a lot maybe we need to find other people.12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?: 2 both online and in middle school.13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?: nope not really14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?: i can't put input in this because i’ve never wanted sex idk what it feels like in high school to want to have sex. for me i’d say when you’re legally an adult but tbh i can't say anything.21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?: OFC if you can't be friends after a break up maybe your relationship wasn't that great to start >_>22: Do you think people should date their friends?: yea why not??? why would you not want to date someone you can be friends with? or like why would you need to date a stranger?23: How many relationships have you had?: 224: Do you think love can last forever?: idk i have not experienced it. I feel like it can but it’s really hard.25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?: nope!! it can help but it won't defeat any evil you have to do that.27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?: mmmm I'm not qualified to give advice to myself. i would go back to five year old me and be like hey,, dude ur gay.28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?: yes but it’s hard ;_;29: What do you notice first about another person?: usually how they look because I'm not a talker, sometimes it’s an interest they have tho. idk 30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?: I'm a ace lesbian 31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?: yes but it would not stop me from wanting to date them. it would only bother me in the sense that some days i prob would not be able to help them or be there for them. love doesn't stop mental illness i know that but i really would try to help my partner if they wanted it.32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?: no33: Do you want to get married one day?: yes! i mean I'm not in a rush or anything actually I'm super cautious about the topic of marriage in general. but idk it just sounds good to get married to someone you’ve loved for a long time.34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?: nope!! sorry i hate needles I'm not getting words on my skin. only images if i really want them. things that are symbolic. if we’re in a super committed relationship and we’re prob gonna get married i might get a tattoo of something that reminds me of you.35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?: yes i want that. it’s ideal but not necessary.36: Are you still a virgin?: yes37: What's more important: Looks or personality?: PERSONALITY looks do count for a little but if i dont like you I'm not gonna like you.38: Do you enjoy love films?: yes but also no. sometimes they make me really uncomfy. especially if they’re het >_> but sometimes they dont!!39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?: no ;_;40: Have you ever had a valentine?: n o  ‘ u ‘41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?: idk i would just like to spend time around them. i love the beach and amusement parks but tbh i would only have fun depending on the person I'm with. if they get motion sick i would be incredibly anxious at the park the entire time, and if they can't collect shells or swim or enjoy the beach i would feel bad.42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?: yup i dont like it that much sorry ;_;43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?: um?? both?? i’ll prob wanna be around my partner more but i love my friends and i would never loose them because I'm in a relationship.44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?: yes? i like all the cutesy romantic stuff ^u^45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?: yes?? maybe?? i dont like thinking about it rn.46: Have you ever been "friend zoned"?: PFF OMG idk maybe?? but tbh i dont give a shit if i wanna date you i prob wanna be your friend just as bad.47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?: i dont have one48: What's your favorite love song?: XDDD um,,,, maybe girls like girls, idk i can't remember49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?: possibly... I'm sorry dude. if thats the case.50: If you're single, why do you think you are?: because I'm gross ‘o’ also i’m not good at talking I'm very quiet. and i hurt myself, and complain all the time, I'm just not good \ ‘_’ /51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?: HAHA U SLIPPED UP i have to pick the asshole because i dont date guys rip >_>52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?: nope i dont know what it’s like.53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?: haha maybe a little. especially around this season.54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?: idk?? is it really that important?? i mean imma do it but I'm also gonna tell my fam and friends in person prob.55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?: yes, clingy maybe no possibly??? but the other things yea. i dont wanna let my anyone know that tho so usually i just deal with it myself.56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?: nope57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?: mm yea. if ur gonna kill yourself do it for you. not because of someone else.58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?: submissive I'm p sure. but tbh i have no clue.59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?: prob ^^;; I'm super forgetful but i’ll try my best to remember ;_;61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?: both?? why would this have to be a choice??? my sisters and brothers are chill if they tell me something’s bad i’ll consider it, but tbh its my choice.62: How do you define "cheating"?: acting in a romantic or sexual way with someone else without my knowledge or consent, especially if you try to keep it a secret from me. if it’s an accident somehow i won't like fight you i’ll give you another chance but remind you it really hurts me and if you do it again it might not be great for my outlook on you.63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?: idk you do you. why would this matter?? if you for reasons i find hard to understand sadly enjoy porn why should i stop you?? it’s like me enjoying anime or video games. dont force me to watch with you and i dont care, it’s something they enjoy why make them stop?64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?: yes and no! i think it’s cute that there’s a day we share chocolates and presents with the person we love!! but tbh i also think it’s super capitalized and if we dont wanna spend on overpriced chocolates n stuff why dont we have valentines day on our own time?65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?: YES like tbh i know I'm a cuddler. i just really like being comfy next to someone idk it feels good and is hard to describe. 

[ppeachymom]

RIGHT BACK AT U CUNT DO ALL THE VALENTINES QUESTIONS

mean ok1: Do you have a crush at the moment?yeah of course 2: Have you ever been deeply in love?yes . i am currently3: Longest relationship you've ever been in?almost a year4: Have you ever changed for someone?yea but i wasn't proud of it5: How is your relationship with your ex?well. my most recent ex isn't good we don't talk anymore but i've dated a few people in my day so it depends 6: Have you ever been cheated on?ya7: Have you ever cheated?no and i will never8: Would you date someone who's well known for cheating?no never9: What's the most important part of a relationship?uhhh. i mean there's a lot but being open and being able to talk to them about anything is very important 10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?serious relationships ??? yes11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on "breaks"?maybe. but not if they get with another person and then they wanna get back with no lol nope 12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?none13: What's one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?probably breaking up w sam14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?uhhhhh. it's kinda a matter of personal preference but i think as long as ur educated about it and ur doing it SAFELy there shouldn't be a problem15: Do you believe in the phrase "age is just a number"?yes. don't be a pedo . unless ur like way older all i'm saying is that legal adults shouldn't be with underage children16: Do you believe in "love at first sight"?idk bc i think that's really basing "love" off of appearance which . will never work out17: Do you believe it's possible to fall in love on the internet?YES . i have18: What do you consider a deal breaker?cheating19: How do you know it's time to end a relationship?probably when u guys start fighting a lot or have a lot of disagreements or like . u just don't feel as loved as u did the most of the time u get me20: Are you currently in a relationship?:)ye21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?idk . it's kinda worked out for me with like one of my exes but idk22: Do you think people should date their friends?uhh idk u do u but i think it messes things up almost all of the time and if u break up ur friendship will literally never be the same 23: How many relationships have you had?actual relationships that lasted like . 3 24: Do you think love can last forever?yes my parents are so in love i love it so much . i love cute lil old couples it warms my heart i want that to be me one day25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?idk i don't think so26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn't approve of?no27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?don't date *** or break up with the person u r deeply in love with to date *** 28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?yes but it can be difficult 29: What do you notice first about another person?personality definitely 30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?honestly idek anymore lol31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?no bc i also suffer from mental illness lol 32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?uh idk33: Do you want to get married one day?yes!! not for a while tho34: What do you think about getting your partner's name tattooed?it's dumb i think35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?yes 36: Are you still a virgin?yes37: What's more important: Looks or personality?personality bc honestly if someone has a nice personality they're already attractive to me38: Do you enjoy love films?yesss39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?yes but from friends40: Have you ever had a valentine?yes41: What's your imagination of a "perfect date"?idk just spending time w the person and also Kissing i would like to kiss please42: Have you ever read "Romeo & Juliet"?yes43: What's more important: Your partner or your friends?both are important44: Would you consider yourself "romantic"?yes very 45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?no46: Have you ever been "friendzoned"?no 47: Which "famous couple" is your favorite?dan and phil don't @ me ?48: What's your favorite love song?idk probably something from my throam playlist49: Have you ever broken someone's heart?idk maybe but i hope not50: If you're single, why do you think you are?i'm not51: Would you rather date someone who's rich but a douchebag or someone who's poor but a nice guy?poor and a nice guy52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?yes i think i am53: Are you jealous of couples when you're single?yes always54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?literally not at all55: Would you consider yourself "clingy", "overly attached" or "jealous"?literally all of the above 56: Have you ever "destroyed" a relationship?uhh yeah my own LoL57: Do you think it's silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?no but u shouldn't do it58: Are you the "dominant" or the "submissive" part in a relationship?,sub goodbye59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner's birthday or your anniversary?no60: What's your opinion on open relationships?idk not for me but if u like them u do what u want61: Who's more important: Your partner or your family?both i am a very family oriented person but also i luv my bf62: How do you define "cheating"?idk a lot of things i guess like talking/flirting w someone whether it be sexual or romantic or actually doing things u would do exclusively in a relationship 63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?nah 64: Do you think Valentine's Day is overrated?a lil but it's cute65: Would you consider yourself a "cuddler"?HELL YEA

[bioniiic]

all the valentine questions ;))

im only doing this because its you

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?yes on my gf beeb 2: Have you ever been deeply in love?i am right now oops 3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in?almost a year4: Have you ever changed for someone?i have bpd fuck u think 5: How is your relationship with your ex?its alright we dont talk much but she’s nice 6: Have you ever been cheated on?no7: Have you ever cheated?no !!! never will8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating?probably not im wayyyyy too paranoid for that 9: What’s the most important part of a relationship?its cliche but its true so trust n communication. n not fucking abusing each other oh my GOD10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?ive only been in one serious relationship n i plan on keeping it so. the first one 11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”?maybe??? i probably wouldn’t be able to if i went on a beak w someone and they started like seeing other people and then wanted to come back like nar 12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?none ! 13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?being too clingy 14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?i mean. technically when they’re ready. but like as long as they’re educated and safe and doing it w someone their age ig15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”? yea as in if ur old u dont have to let it hold u back from doing fun things like climbing a fuckin mountain but NOT WITH SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS fuck no date someone in yr own age range. at least if ur a fucking child. if ur an adult do what u want just don’t date children 16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”?i have no idea 17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet?i did ? so yes 18: What do you consider a deal breaker?if they’re. smelly n mean19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship?when theyre not talking to you w the same spark as they used to and they’re always making you feel useless and clingy. when ur the only thing holding it together 20: Are you currently in a relationship?yes !!21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?maybe ? very much depends 22: Do you think people should date their friends?its honestly none of my business. like. i did. but if u break up it might be a lot harder because you are really close n have a bond23: How many relationships have you had?224: Do you think love can last forever?yes!! the lil cute old ppl who are still in love that’s who i wanna be25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?no but i wont get into that26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of?no ??? thats rlly not their place 27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?breathe. take it easy n stop worrying all the time 28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?yes but they’re so so so hard :;:((29: What do you notice first about another person?their voice?? their hands n their eyes30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?this is v binary but im pan !31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?not at all im literally a mess if they can deal with me i can deal w them 32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?no33: Do you want to get married one day?some day in a long time maybe. but im a child of DIVORCE ok im v cynical about marriage 34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed?don’t do it idc how long u think ur gonna be together stop it35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?im in a ldr. yes36: Are you still a virgin?yea37: What’s more important: Looks or personality?personality!! but im not gonna sit here n say looks aren’t important like u have seen my girlfriend a true 10 38: Do you enjoy love films?there are films i appreciate more but ill watch them39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?no40: Have you ever had a valentine?i mean. kinda 41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”?DOING NOTHING 42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”?no i watched the leonardo dicaprio one though43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends?go away. BOTH44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”?im a Pisces i eat that shit up45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?no46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”?no also its not real 47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite?barack and michelle obama. idc. iconic. 48: What’s your favorite love song?the first song that came to mind was love at first sight by the brobecks HFJDJNC so i guess that 49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?i hope not 50: If you’re single, why do you think you are?not51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy?poor but nice wtf ??? unless its my sugar daddy n he’s dying anyway id just. u know 52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?i hope i am,,,,,because i give a lot of it53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single?when i was yes54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)?not at all. but like if u want. but that’s not the actual way to make it official,,,, fuckin youths 55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”?ALL OF THE ABOVE56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship?probably 57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart?no but dont do it though 58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship?,,,,,dominant. in all the matters am i right ladies 59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary?i dont think so 60: What’s your opinion on open relationships?do what u gotta do 61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family?my family is literally A SHIT so right now id rather spend some time w my girl62: How do you define “cheating”?everything from talking romantically/sexually w someone else to fucking them. flirting counts boo63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?HFJDJFN OF COURSE NOT 64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated?a little. but its cute 65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”?i cuddle everything n everyone i wish i was cuddling right now

[nomtxas]

answer them all I'm bored

gotcha fam

1:Do you have a crush at the moment? – besides me being in love w k*rl a*zner, grubbie, and burky i dont think i have a crush on anyone (well i guess not what u would call a “crush” i think)

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? – no

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? – almost a month like i think my ex broke up w me a day before our one month (it was back in july so i dont really remember)

4: Have you ever changed for someone? – uhm yeah (god i was such an idiot)

5: How is your relationship with your ex? – non existent like i dont think she likes me very much considering we havent spoken at all since we broke up

6: Have you ever been cheated on? – not that im aware of no

7: Have you ever cheated? – no i would never

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating? – no bc once a cheater always a cheater

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship? – communication like i think people should be honest and open about what they want and what they expect out of the relationship like pls dont tell me ur ok w distance when ur really not, u feel?

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? – serious relationships pls i like the thought of being committed to someone

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? – i dont have experience w that so i dont know how i feel abt breaks

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with? – none i dont do sex

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship? – getting back together w her after we broke up the first time

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? – when they’re emotionally mature the consequences of sex and what it involves so maybe 20 and up

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”? – sometimes 

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”? – yep

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? – yep ive done it twice (but twice it didnt work out both times so)

18: What do you consider a deal breaker? – dishonesty and not being loyal

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? – i dont know actually which is why i guess i was the one getting dumped

20: Are you currently in a relationship? – no but i want to be

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? – yes absolutely didnt work out that way for me but just bc it didnt for me doesnt mean it wont for others

22: Do you think people should date their friends? – i have mixed feelings on this bc i believe u should be friends w someone to get to know them first before entering a relationship w them so u guys will know what u want and how u are but on the other hand i feel that they shouldnt bc u dont want to ruin a good friendship w messy feelings i guess it’s up to that particular individual 

23: How many relationships have you had? – one

24: Do you think love can last forever? – absolutely look at my grandparents theyve been married for almost 45 years and been together for longer than that so

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things? – eh i dont know

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? – probably bc even though it gets hard sometimes my moms opinion matters a lot to me

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? – DONT GET BACK TOGETHER W HER YA DINGUS IT’S NOT GOING TO WORK OUT AND YOURE JUST GOING TO MAKE URSELF CRY AGAIN

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work? – i think so if the parties involved put in the same amount of effort and it’s not all just one sided 👀👀👀   

29: What do you notice first about another person? – their eyebrows? is that weird

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? – polyromantic but i call myself gay all the time bc im attracted to femme presenting people such as myself

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness? – no absolutely not i feel like i would be supportive and try to hold their hand while they take care of themselves

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? – nope

33: Do you want to get married one day? – yes!

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed? – bad karma but if people want to than thats their business

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex? – yep i dont do sex bc im ace (grey ace but still)

36: Are you still a virgin? – yep

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? – both i think

38: Do you enjoy love films? – yes im a sucker for romantic movies

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? – no :(((

40: Have you ever had a valentine? – no 

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”? – a baseball/hockey game and dinner after

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? – high school english was a dark time

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? – both 

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? – yep but too bad i dont have anyone to be romantic w :(((((

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends? – 👀👀👀   

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”? – yep but it’s ok

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite? – the holtbys ok theyre the power couple of the n hl

48: What’s your favorite love song? – life is better with you by michael franti & spearhead it’s so cute 

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? – i dont think so i did get this one anon that said i dont care abt people when they do have a crush on me so idk

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are? – bc im ugly and boring

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy? – hows the poor guy gonna take me to sports games? nah im kid but i feel like the second one bc i dont want to date someone whos mean bc i will cry

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships? – nope not at all

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single? – yep definitely bc i want to have that too

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)? – not really

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”? – clingy and jealous (im trying to work on it tho)

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? – possibly

57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart? – no

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship? – ….sub

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary? – never but then again ive only been in one relationship my whole life

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships? – i personally dont think i could do it but if u do then more power to u

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family? – both

62: How do you define “cheating”? – when u start looking at other people the way u see ur partner and not being honest w them abt it communication is key

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate? – nah

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated? – a little yeah but thats bc ive never been an active participant in it lmao

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”? – def only in the winter tho bc texas summers are hell like literally

[reymowl]

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[whatdoesagoodgirllooklike-blog]

Girly Essays

Essay: Lolita

Girly: Sarah K. Cleaver on Tumblr nymphets

BY SARAH KATHRYN CLEAVER ON 18 NOVEMBER 2014.

These girls are wasting their youth fetishising it, treating it as a theme to be curated, collected and carefully documented.

In August 2013, paparazzi snapshots of Bradley Cooper and Suki Waterhouse were posted on the Mail Online and several other gossip sites. The two were pictured in various sprawling poses as they relaxed in a park in Paris reading - here's the crux - Lolita. The accompanying headlines all reported a similar narrative, but none more hysterically than Perez Hilton; 'Bradley Cooper’s Life Imitates Art As He Reads Lolita To Barely Legal Girlfriend Suki Waterhouse.' The already easy to grasp point was hammered home with the aid of Hilton’s famous Photoshop paint skills -  '21 is just 12 backwards.’ One of these images in particular, - Waterhouse sitting with Cooper's head resting between her denim dungarees-clad legs as he presumably reads a favourite passage aloud - has multiplied endlessly on Tumblr, liked and reblogged hundreds of thousands of times. fallinhardforhim reblogged this from withloveclaudia, yourlittlegirllala reblogged this from moody-nymph, goodbye-lolita liked this. Spot the trend?

A controversial book since its publication, Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita is considered by many to be one of the 20th century's greatest novels but is widely famous largely due to its controversial subject matter - a man in his thirties sexually obsessed with a 12-year-old girl.

According to an interview in the New Yorker with John Bertram, co-author of Lolita: The Story of a Cover Girl: Vladimir Nabokov’s Novel in Art and Design, there have been roughly two hundred Lolita covers since its original blank canvas, which featured black lettering over a shade of green reminiscent of old school exercise books. Somehow, in failing (or not even attempting) to illustrate what was inside, erotic fiction publishers Olympia Press managed to create the dirtiest of dirty book covers. Almost sixty years, two film adaptations and countless references and misrepresentations in popular culture later, it's still a book that garners a curious glance or two from fellow commuters on the tube.

The conflicts inherent in Lolita stem from the impossibility of re-capturing what has been perfectly expressed by Nabokov in those 300 or so pages; the co-existence of obsessive love and self-serving tyranny. Writer Mary Gaitskill in the introduction to The Story of a Cover Girl cites this as the reason why Lolita cover art is so often poorly attempted; 'such impossible, infernal combinations there are in all of us, and we know it. That Lolitarenders this human condition at such an extreme, so truthfully… is this book's most shocking quality… It is also why no one will ever succeed in describing it fully on a book jacket.' Despite this difficulty, references are rife, from pop song lyrics to the long-standing Japanese 'gothic lolita' fashion The young women who have appropriated Lolita on Tumblr are practically a trope in their own right.

The nymphet community is an online subculture revolving around Lolita, its themes and its accompanying imagery. The fandom spans a diverse range of Lolita interpretations, from superficial feeds of anything pastel-coloured, to the almost inventorial, right through to the pornographic and upsettingly dark , As with any following, the community contains those die-hard fans who insist on authenticity alongside those who are along purely for the aesthetic. As one blogger complains; 'whenever I see people that think Lolita is romantic I wanna cry. Have u even read the book/ seen the movie or are you just in the nymphet community to be kool #nymphet #lolita.'

While the spectrum is broad, the average nymphet blog will usually contain at least one of a list of typical references. Firstly, and obviously, Lolita. Quotes from the book, stills, memes and GIFs from either film. Kubrick's 1962 is better stylistically, but Adrian Lynne's 1997 version is the more popular, probably because it's closer to the book, darker, more sexual and far less perfect. Dominique Swain's screen test from the same film denotes a real Lolita buff, as do the deleted scenes found on the DVD. Other 'age-gap' films seen over and over include Pretty Baby (1978), The Crush (1992), My Little Princess (2011), Sleeping Beauty (2011) and Jeune et Jolie(2013). Then there are vintage signifiers, pulp novel covers ranging in levels of bad taste (my personal favourite Daddy I'm Coming), photographs of vintage underwear, Parisian street photographs. There's the personal posts, 'I dropped my pen in a lecture today and two guys and the lecturer went to fetch it for me and is this nymphet power or what? #nymphet #thoughts.' And finally, the porn - huge amounts of porn. 'It's all American Beauty and cum!' exclaims a colleague as we scroll through one of the afore-mentioned pages belonging to a girl named ‘pulp-princess’. All this content is displayed on blogs that have been painstakingly coded to pink-tinted perfection (no basic Tumblr templates for these girls) and soundtracked by the mournful strains of Lana del Rey: 'I'll wait for you babe, that's all I'll do babe, you don't come through babe, you never do. 'Cause I'm pretty when I cry.'

Del Rey pops up a lot on these blogs. She’s a fellow, if honorary (given her age), nymphet. When interviewed, the singer-songwriter, whose real name is Lizzie Grant, cites Lolita as a reference, describing the sound of her first album as 'Lolita lost in the hood.' There is even a track on Born To Die named Lolita, but it's Off to the Racesthat borrows most heavily from both the book and the 1997 film. 'Swimming pool, glimmering darling' - a deleted swimming pool scene, 'Light of my life, fire of my loins' - a direct quote from page one, 'Give me them gold coins, Give me them coins' - another scene in which coins spill over an unmade bed as the couple fight over money that Humbert has bribed Lo with in return for sex. The list continues, even the songs that don't reference Lolitastill evoke that same type of doomed love.

Over the years many young women have probably read Lolita, liked the book and maybe even identified with aspects of the character, but it's only with the prevalence of the internet that you can observe the vast, primarily young and female fandom. Why this character? She has no agency or voice of her own in the book or either film, most of her lines are responses to what is being done to her. But it's her they're interested in, not so much her step-father/lover/abuser Humbert Humbert (affectionately known as Hum) even though the nymphets claim to be interested in older men. And though Tumblr is an aesthetically-led form of social media, for many of these users it's not quite as simple as style over substance either.  This isn't a tentative grasp on the vague and various meanings attached to Lo over the years. Theirs is an informed obsession, not just an attraction to Bert Stern's pictures of Sue Lyon in heart shaped glasses.

With its vast proportion of teenage users, Tumblr is an angsty place. When discussing nostalgia and the internet in a panel discussion on Marques Almeida’s S/S 15 show, SHOWstudio founder Nick Knight pointed out that Tumblr’s community appear to fixate on the dark, the unhappy and the melancholy. 'There's a certain obsession with sadness on Tumblr, sadness seems to be kind of around at the moment… You see things that magazines on the whole won't show. Self harm, food obsessions. Things that are personal. A fascination for death. I do think it ties in with a global movement.'

Western young women today arguably have more options than ever before, but there's a pressure that arises from that to accomplish more. When you never quite feel like you’re getting enough right it makes sense to fetishise the wrong. It's not unusual to find something upsetting enough to make you close the tab in a nymphet blog; the gruesome dismembered body of Elizabeth Short (aka The Black Dahlia) just down the page from a pinterest-y shot of pastel colour silk dresses hanging in a vintage wardrobe. A violent pornographic image transformed into a meme with the darkly romantic Arctic Monkeys lyrics 'crawling back to you', then later a GIF of spindly spiders fighting in the corner of a ceiling. Reading Lolita in Tehran author Azar Nafisi points out that Lolita's real name Dolores means sorrow, and Lolita blogs are always sad. While at face value a curation of the sexualisation of young girls, on closer inspection nymphet blogs document tragedy. The type of femininity these young women – and for that matter Lana del Rey - have chosen to identify with is one that is doomed from the start. Either Oscar Wilde or George Bernard Shaw said youth is wasted on the young. These particular girls are wasting theirs fetishising it, treating youth as a theme to be curated, collected and carefully documented. 

It's this juxtaposition of the cute and girlish with the violent that expresses the core theme of Lolita better than any blonde teen sucking a lollypop on numerous book jackets ever can.

This is an essay written alongside ‘Girly’ - the fashion film. It remarks on the ‘Lolita movement’ and really converses the message I am aiming to portray in my concept as well. I italicised and made bold, key points that I thought really struck a chord with what is going on. The polar opposite ideal I am discussing, and how the sweetness and innocence of ‘Lolita’ is so revolting against the sinister darkness of the paedophilic behaviour occurring in the story. Dolores is a minor, it’s just a game to her,

[savingpeopleslayingthings]

u said be nosy please so im gon be nosy 1-65 valentines day questions hav fun

ooooh yay thank you! I love when people ask a lot of questions, and since I have nothing better to do on Valentines day, this is perfect.

1: Do you have a crush at the moment?

Nope. Wait- theres a cute girl I work with. I don’t know if it’s reached crush levels but I felt like I should mention it.

2: Have you ever been deeply in love?

Do fictional characters count? No? Then yeah that will be a no from me.

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in?

0 days, 0 hours, 0 minutes, and exactly 0 seconds.

4: Have you ever changed for someone?

I’ve definitely pretended to be different in order to fit into friend groups at times. 

5: How is your relationship with your ex?

Fantastic considering they don’t exist.

6: Have you ever been cheated on?

Can’t be cheated on if you never date (insert that meme thing here)

7: Have you ever cheated?

See above question.

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating?

No, most likely not. 

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship?

Trust. I think it’s really important to be able to trust your partner and be worthy of your partner’s trust. Even in a friendship, trust is crucial. 

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

I’d prefer a serious relationship. I’m too in love with the idea of love for just flings.

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”?

If it’s needed, then yeah. It may help the relationship.

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with?

I’m a virgin, so…. 

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship?

Can’t regret anything if you’ve never said/done anything to anyone at all!

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex?

At least 16. Ideally I would say 17-18, but realistically I would say 16.

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”?

Nope. Age can show what stage you are in your life, and if you are in such a different stage as someone else, that relationship can’t be healthy.

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”?

I think there’s definitely a “lust at first sight” which can easily lead to love. 

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet?

I think so. I don’t know if it’s possible for me, but for others, definitely.

18: What do you consider a deal breaker?

Abuse, cheating, overall assholery. Also if they diss any of the books I read then fuck them we’re done. 

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship?

I would say when the negatives of staying with them outnumber the positives. Also that’s really easy to say as someone who has only ever been single.

20: Are you currently in a relationship?

With myself, yes.

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends?

Definitely, if that’s what they both want.

22: Do you think people should date their friends?

See above answer.

23: How many relationships have you had?

A solid 0.

24: Do you think love can last forever?

With work and effort, yeah.

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things?

I would hope so. I’m such a romantic that I need to believe that.

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of?

I would like to think no, but it would definitely put a strain in the relationship at this point in my life, considering that I can’t drive and rely on my parents for a lot.

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be?

There’s no rush.

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work?

I think so. If the two people are dedicated and willing to make it work, it can.

29: What do you notice first about another person?

Usually its either hair (for women) or face/bone structure (for men). 

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual?

Bi! Although I guess I’m kinda pan actually, but I prefer the label bisexual.

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness?

Nope, considering I suffer from ALL OF THEM. Kidding, only like… 200.

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?

No, thankfully.

33: Do you want to get married one day?

Definitely, 100% yes,

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed?

I’ll pass on that thanks.

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex?

I’m not sure. I think I would be able to, but I don’t know.

36: Are you still a virgin?

Yes I am

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality?

Personality, but to be honest looks still play a big part.

38: Do you enjoy love films?

YES!! I LOVE LOVE

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses?

Do flowers after a play count? Because I’ve been given roses by family then.

40: Have you ever had a valentine?

Not a real one. But once in seventh grade a kid literally threw a teddy bear and necklace at me from across the hall. Apparently he had a big crush on me but didn’t want to say it. It was a nice necklace. Yeah nothing came from that though.

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”?

Probably just going somewhere different, maybe the beach or a park or something, and spending time together.

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”?

Yes and I wasn’t a huge fan. I prefer King Lear.

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends?

Friends. But again, I have no partner. If I picked partner I would probably look like a dick.

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”?

I love love, but I have no clue what to do in romantic situations, so no.

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends?

uh maybe idk

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”?

Yeah, but then I helped him get together with the girl he actually liked so it all worked out and I became their #1 cheerleader. 

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite?

Can I do fictional ones instead? because I know nothing about celebrity couples and instead just want to talk about Feyre and Rhys from ACOTAR. They are goals!!!!

48: What’s your favorite love song?

It’s hard to pick a favorite. You know what, I don’t care if I’m cliche. I have to pick Can’t Help Falling in Love

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

Yeah, I think. I don’t know. He was pretty creepy so I didn’t feel much guilt

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are?

Because I’m afraid of commitment and being in a relationship. Also my standards are extremely high, I am too wrapped up in myself, and people aren’t my favorite things in the world.

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy?

Poor nice guy, as long as he isnt a ‘nice guy’

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships?

I actually give people romantic advice a lot. I still question why I’m asked when I have 0 experience, but I won’t complain

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single?

Yeah, a lot.

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on facebook)?

I don’t think it would be too important to me. 

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”?

For the most part, I’ve been pretty distant when it comes to people I’ve dated or have considered dated. But I also didn’t love them, or even really like them that much, so I may end up being clingy if in a good relationship

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship?

You need to be in a relationship to destroy one.

57: x

o

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship?

I’m really insecure and prefer to have things chosen for me, so more submissive. But I also like to be the center of attention, so maybe a bit dominant

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary?

Haven’t had the chance to, thank god.

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships?

If it works for the people in the relationship, and everyone is fine with it, then good for them.

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family?

Family. 

62: How do you define “cheating”?

Touching someone who isn’t a part of the relationship in a way that would upset/hurt your partner. 

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate?

I don’t think so. Unless its all you do. Even if you aren’t in a relationship, that would be inappropriate

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated?

I don’t know. I love all the romance and adorableness, but also why not make every day valentines day and always treat your significant other with this much repect and love?

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”?

I am. Definitely.

Yay now you know more about me!