#afc richmond - women team

[ditheringkestrel]

just found out brendan hunt is/was 15 minutes away from my house do NOT text

[danadaria]

AFC Richmond - Men Team: Himbos, trying to dismantle toxic masculinity, weirdly spinsters, allies, "We would die for you Coach".

AFC Richmond - Women Team: 1/3 have a PhD, political activists, half of them are married to someone from a rival team (or country!), there's 5 token straights, "Rebecca Welton can kill me however she wants".

[writtenndust]

I need to see them take on the world together, in every scenario, in every world. Just give them adventures, please. 

Ted Lasso 3.12 So Long, Farewell

[jamiefartt]

run the world; part two.

masterlist, part 1.

pairings: Jamie Tartt x reader, a bit of Sam Obisanya x reader.

summary: as the striker for AFC Richmond's very first women's team, the pressure is on. you're desperate to bond with the men's team, especially their number 9. so when your captains make you two train together, you find special ways to make it fun for both of you.

words: 10.5k

warnings: nausea mentioned, no smut but sexual references, a looootta dialogue (sorry but I love it), mean Jamie and also mean reader oooh

———

the feeling of Jamie's fingers planted firmly between yours makes your skin red hot, and your arms suddenly stop shaking on your last push-up. with your ears ringing, you know your face is bright red as you forget to breathe for the last strain. Roy counts the last number, and Jamie's hand immediately pulls away from yours as he sits back on his knees. you fold through your elbows, collapsing flat onto the ground, your flushed chest cooling against the cold grass. fighting the urge to glance over at Jamie, you screw your eyes shut, taking deep breaths as you recover from the strenuous push-ups. twenty push-ups is easy, but with the slow speed Roy was counting at, you feel as if you did double that amount. your right hand clenches into a fist, the lingering feeling of Jamie's fingers touching yours making your nerve endings feel like static. why did he do that? it must have been on purpose, him having to outstretch his arm uncomfortably in order to reach you. but why?

"well done. take a quick water break," Roy says as he walks away from the two of you. you don't hear Jamie move to get up, but you can't keep your eyes closed forever, so you push yourself up and onto your knees. his legs are sprawled out in front of you, mud and grass coating his metal studs, and his arms hold his torso up as they're outstretched behind him. trying to avoid his gaze, you keep your eyes down as you reach up to tighten your ponytail. still, you can feel his eyes burning into your skin, and you know he's going to say something.

"ooh, y/n," Jamie starts.

"knew it," you mutter to yourself, squeezing one eye shut as you look up at him.

"I think you've had a bit of an accident." Jamie hisses through his teeth as he points at his own cheek. you quickly reach a hand to your face, wiping your cheek before looking at your fingers. you roll your eyes at him and grunt when you notice it's just some dirt, the irrational thought of it being dog shit leaving your mind just as quickly as it came. "you're the worst," you groan, standing up before jogging towards the dugout, heading straight for the walkway into the training centre. pushing open the door to the women's bathroom, you sigh deeply, wondering what the fuck just happened between you and Jamie. running the tap until the water heats up, you pull a paper towel from its dispenser before soaking it. as you bring it up to your cheek to wipe off the mud, you stare at the hand Jamie touched. it felt like electricity, like pins and needles, and like hot fire running through your veins all at the same time. maybe it was because you had been holding your weight for way too long, or maybe it was simply touch deprivation.

"y/n!" Gia bursts into the bathroom, making you jump and drop the wet paper in the sink with a slapping sound.

"fucking hell, Gia!" you shout at her, placing your hands on each side of the porcelain sink to stabilise yourself.

"how's it going?" she drags out her words, turning to the mirror to redo her hair. she smiles at you and raises her eyebrows suggestively, but when she sees your defeated expression, her face drops and concern clouds her eyes. she nudges you with her knee, her hands occupied as she twists her long hair into a bun, "what's up? did he say something?"

once again, you sigh deeply, too shy to look her in the eye as you think about how to word your thoughts; "no, no, nothing too crazy. he did talk about tying his dick to my tits, though. I have no idea what that was about-"

"oh," Gia laughs, "that was something Roy made them do in training one time! they, like, tied a red string to their dick and then connected it with another guy's dick and tried to play football. it was... kinda hot."

"okay, anyways," you grimace at the thought, disgusted with your best friend, and shake the image out of your head. you continue: "we were doing shooting drills and we made it a bit of a competition and it was actually quite fun, you know?"

"yes! holy shit! I did it! I need to tell Isaac," Gia yells, turning to leave the bathroom. you reach a hand out, grabbing hers to pull her back to face you. "Gia!" you yell, snapping her out of her blind excitement. "oh, right, sorry. continue," she clears her throat and sniffs, trying her best to act casual.

"it was a lot of fun until- basically, if we missed goal post we had to do push-ups together, right? so, Jamie missed and was such a fucking baby about it, and we were facing each other while we did them..."

"go on," Gia's eyes are wide, a smile growing on her lips as she stares at you.

"Jamie caught me checking out his arms- which you can't blame me for!" you say quickly, knowing Gia was about to interrupt you again, "and then when we were doing the last push-up he put his fingers between mine like this, see?" you demonstrate by interlocking your fingers, turning them to get the perspective right. "or, like, here," you pick up her hand, moving your fingers between hers to show her properly. Gia is completely silent, and you wonder if she just hasn't understood your explanation, but when your eyes flick up to hers, her face is frozen in shock. you roll your eyes and drop her hand, clapping in front of her face. her jaw is slack, and she doesn't blink at all until you poke her chest, dragging her back to earth.

"Gia, chill, it might have been an accident." you say, grabbing a new paper towel to dry the remaining water droplets off your cheek.

"an accident? are you fucking serious?"

"he was probably just trying to throw me off or something..." you reason, walking backwards to throw the tissues into the bin.

"y/n... really? he wanted contact with you- physical contact, and that isn't an easy mistake. this is great!"

"no! nothing about this is great! he's a dick, he was definitely just fucking with me. he saw me staring at his muscles, so what? Jamie's got such an ego, I bet he loved the attention."

"yeah he did..." Gia drawls, putting her hands on your shoulders and shaking you side to side. she cackles in your face, and the contagious sound forces a smile through your grumpy exterior. "there you go!" she chirps, "and even if he is just messing with you, just do it back! he's Jamie Tartt, it's okay to think he's fit-"

"I don't-" you protest, but Gia interrupts you again; "shut up. he could get any girl he wants, but I guarantee we can get him to chase you."

you scoff and huff a laugh at her words; "why would I want that?"

"because it's fun."

back on the pitch, you push away your nerves as you head back to Jamie and Roy. you continue your drills, taking shots from different angles to the goal, and you even kick it against Jamie on purpose during one of your turns. this time, when Roy makes you do push ups, you stay a safe distance away from him, keeping to yourself. if this was any other day, you'd find the repetitive drills boring, but you can't deny you're having a lot of fun with Jamie. of course, your constant competition is the main source of that fun, and with every mean or teasing jab you throw at each other, you find yourself enjoying the outlet. football always riles you up, anger and frustration taking over when you miss a goal or pass, but oddly enough, having someone to be unapologetically mean to helps. every time one of you hit the post, you call each other a rude name, or insult each other's skills, and you always count yourself successful when your words bring a small smile to Roy's face.

a whistle blows at the other side of the pitch, pulling you and Jamie out of a childish argument about how to best tie the laces of your boots. you pause mid-sentence, a finger still poking his chest from your back-and-forth bickering. he chuckles, bringing his hand up and wrapping it around yours before pushing it down; "that means I win." you glance down at your hands, his fingers still lightly holding on to you, before looking back up at his face. clenching your jaw, you huff a breath through your nose and pull your hand from his; "this isn't over, Tartt."

jogging away from him, you meet the rest of the team at the side of the field, everyone grouped together to listen to Isaac and Gia again. you find Sam, standing next to him; "hey Sam," you sigh, grateful to have a break from Jamie for some positive energy from Sam.

"hi, y/n, how was that?" he asks you, eyebrows arched as he awaits your answer.

"oh, you know... fucking awful." Sam laughs at your words, and you smile up at him as you shake your head.

"don't pretend it was all bad, y/n. you enjoyed checking me out didn't you?" Jamie's voice appears behind you, and you suck in your lips and close your eyes at the sound. dropping your head forward in defeat, you're scared to open your eyes and see Sam's face, so you whip around to look at Jamie instead. clearly, he caught up with you, and clearly, he has no desire to leave you alone before the next activity.

you cock your head to the side, squinting at Jamie with a challenging look in your eyes; "you wish I was checking you out, Jamie."

he pouts and throws his eyes to the sky, pretending to be deep in thought for a few seconds. he hums to himself as he crosses his arms; "I don't know..." you hold your breath as you await his next words, "you seemed to be doing it at Sam's restaurant too, and uhm, when else did- oh yeah, earlier before we even started training! you're a thirsty one,"

your hand comes up to your hair as you nervously fix your already-perfect ponytail, thinking of what to say to that. he isn't lying, but you also didn't think he'd noticed your particular admiration with his biceps. "yeah, yeah, as if," you mutter, hoping your tone seemed stern enough to get Jamie off your back. you turn back to Sam, looking up at him with a grimace, widening your eyes and shaking your head at him; "what an ego, right?" Sam squints at you skeptically, pouting his lips and nodding along, but you can easily tell he believes Jamie more than you.

"whistle!" Roy's loud voice interrupts your awkward silence, and you face forward and blow out a breath. the thick air is heavy between the three of you, and you can feel both of your shoulders brushing their arms ever so slightly, finally noticing just how close they are to you. you make no effort to move away, however, enjoying the warmth their presence gives you as the cold breeze hits your bare legs. cheeks flushing, you're kind of enjoying the buzz standing between them gives you; is this the chase that Gia was talking about? maybe this is the excitement you initially missed with Sam?

"we're about to play a full 90 minute game as if it was the real thing. we have a starting lineup, and a big list of subs, so-" Gia shouts.

"boys, I don't wanna see any fucking injuries before this weekend, so don't be big men about it and just sit out when you need, understood?" the guys all hum in agreement, some of them saying a simple "yes captain."

"if I call your name, that means you're starting eleven for the bibs, so just stand to the side a bit," Gia continues, motioning a hand to the left of the crowd, "then, I'm gonna call out the subs. whoever's left will be the starters for shirts. everyone got that?" you nod at her words, and the others do the same amongst a chorus of yesses. once she's finished calling out the list, you're in the starting lineup for shirts, Sam beside you. the team is made up of a mix of the two teams, and the smirk on your face as you watch Jamie slip on a bib is priceless. Gia and Isaac know what they're doing, and you can't say you're complaining.

"dream team?" Sam leans down beside you, whispering in your ear. you turn to face him, sending him a quick wink; "you know it."

you all get into position, you and Jamie standing face-to-face in the middle of the pitch. Roy stands beside you two, holding the football under his arm. no captains have been assigned, so it's up to you and Jamie to flip the coin. you stare into his dark eyes, his pupils blown wide, reminding you of the way he looked at you as you were doing push-ups. lips parting slightly, your heart rate speeds up as you struggle keeping your eyes on his; his gaze is intense, completely unwavering as he looks at you. his smirk is subtle, but present, and you let your eyes flick to his lips for a split second. of course, Jamie notices the slight movement, raising his eyebrows ever so slightly.

"heads." you say abruptly, pulling yourself from your staring competition with him. he sucks in a breath as he finally tears his eyes off yours to look at Roy, realising there's no opportunity for him to tease you any further. Jamie watches the coin as Roy tosses it in the air, but your eyes stay on his face, taking your chance to stare at him without being called out for it. dragging your eyes over his sharp features, you admire how smooth his skin is, wondering why such an idiot deserves such good genetics. just as Roy shouts "tails!" your eyes land on Jamie's lips again, and it's too late to look away as he turns to face you again. he leans forward, bringing his face close to yours; "you can kiss 'em if you let me win."

his teasing words make your nostrils flare in frustration as you bring a hand up, pushing it to the middle of his chest. the slight blow makes him take a step backwards, and he laughs out loud at your strop as you move out of the way for him to kick off the match. jaw clenched, you keep your eyes on the ball as he places it down. his feet drag backwards in the grass three times before tucking his loose shorts into his skin-tight undershorts. your eyes linger on his thighs, the deep lines highlighting his muscles. with your eyes glued on his legs, you watch as he runs and shoots the ball to his defenders. you hang back as Jamie's team charges forward, watching as he sprints towards your goal. it all goes so quickly, he catches up with the ball, intercepting a pass between your team and pelting it into the goal all within the first five minutes of the game. "offside!" you shout, but the ref, who's really one of your coaches, counts it as a goal.

and so begins the game, with an instant goal by Jamie. he couldn't be cockier about it, running across the pitch with his arms outstretched, Dani jumping on his back to celebrate. clearly your irritation is obvious, Sam jogging over to you and placing a hand on your arm to keep you close as he whispers in your ear. your eyes find Jamie's across the pitch as he stares at the two of you, no longer celebrating with his team. his mouth is turned down in a grimace, and you stick your tongue out at him playfully. Sam explains a tactic to you, making sure you understand which play you're going to do. apparently, it's one the men do all the time, and that's exactly why they won't be expecting you to do it.

with the ball back in play, your team immediately snatches it from the bibs. making its way down the pitch, everyone is quick on their feet, and you run aimless circles trying to get in the way of the others. the ball is passed to Sam, and as he runs towards you, you start asking for the ball; "yeah, Sam, here! pass it!" defenders are on you instantly, all crowding around you as you run towards the goal. instead of passing it to you, however, Sam makes a sudden shoot for the goal, aiming for the corner of the net. his kick is sharp and fast, the ball flying through the air at a rapid pace before crashing straight into the goal. he sprints towards you with his arms open, and you run straight into them to hug him. your team runs up behind you, all crowding around you and jumping up and down as you all celebrate.

"our false nine!" Ted screams across the pitch, "yes, y/n! that's exactly how you do it!" he runs over to you and Sam, giving you both a fist bump. "hey, Jamie, take notes buddy." he says with a delighted smile before strolling back to the side of the pitch, hands deep in the pockets of his khakis. you widen your eyes at Jamie, holding your fingers in an L-shape and bringing it to your forehead, sticking out your tongue again for added effect. it seems he took it to heart, immediately huddling his team together to discuss plays. you and Sam do the same, but decide with your team to just have fun with it and play as well as you can.

with five minutes left before half-time, you're nearly ready to sub someone else in for your position, the exhaustion and cold suddenly hitting you deep in your bones. the game is red hot, everyone running on pure adrenaline. right before making your second goal of the game, you lose the ball to the opposition, but decide to use your last bit of energy to burst to the middle of the pitch, desperate to get that ball back. they pass it to Jamie, and you narrow your eyes as you chase him. technically, it's up to the others to get the ball off him, but as you watch the ball rolling at his feet, your rivalry trumps the way of the game. sprinting as hard as you possible can, the cold air pulls tears from your eyes as the wind hits you, and you can see your teammates following you in your peripheral; perfect. you push through three powerful strides until you're right on Jamie's heels. using all your force, you slide a foot in front of him, aiming more for his feet than the ball. you trip him up perfectly, and he comes crashing down as the ball rolls ahead of him. whilst you fall to the ground, you see one of your teammates get possession of the ball, immediately passing it back down the pitch.

after landing on the ground on your side, you push yourself up, leaning on your arm to see Jamie lying flat on his back in front of you. his legs are sprawled in front of him, hands coming up to his face and rubbing it in frustration. as he sits up, he smacks the ground, grunting loudly. you throw your head back and cackle as pure adrenaline flows through your veins. whilst catching your breath from your crazy sprint, you force yourself onto your feet, and you stumble over to Jamie with a tired huff, looking down at him with a smug smile. reaching a hand out for him to take, you hear loud cheers and screams erupt behind you, but you don't need to check to know your team scored.

"I win?" you ask Jamie, who squints up at you with one eye shut. he's taking his time to stare at you, so you raise your eyebrows at him in question, and with a deep sigh, he finally lifts up his hand, grabbing yours. you pull him up to his feet, smile smug.

"you win," he sighs, dropping your hand and brushing the grass off his clothes. his face is stone cold, eyes avoiding yours. you move your head to try to catch his gaze, but he quickly turns away from you, walking off the pitch. his shoulders are hunched with his head down, keeping his eyes on the ground as he walks.

"wait, sorry, what was that? I don't think I heard you right," you attempt to tease him, jogging behind him. he ignores you, so you reach a hand up to his shoulder trying to get his attention. Jamie turns to you abruptly, shrugging your hand from his shoulder before catching it with his hand before pulling you into his chest. your smile drops in surprise as a smirk appears on his face again, and your breath hitches in your throat as you crash against him. your legs are too tired to hold you up, so he quickly wraps a hand around your waist, holding you close to him. completely taken aback, you don't have it in you to push him away, instead looking up at him with wide, stunned eyes.

Jamie leans down, placing his mouth right beside your ear. his breath fanning your skin makes goosebumps appear, and you struggle to keep breathing at the feeling. "you win, y/n." his voice is sultry and low, and your hand being held against his chest lets you feel the vibrations rumble through him. your knees threaten to buckle, but you dig your studs into the grass beneath you as he lets go of your waist. you're speechless and breathless at the same time, and the feeling of his arm around you leaves your skin tingling. his hand lingers on the hand he's holding for just a beat too long, and you quickly pull it away from him, reaching your hands up to run them over your hair awkwardly. "okay. thank you, Jamie," you sputter before turning on your heel and walking off the pitch, hearing your blood pumping through your veins as your legs carry you straight towards Roy.

"just sub someone in for me, I need to- uhm... take a shit?" you say unconvincingly, and Roy bites back a smile as he stares down at you. you stick to your guns, popping your hip with a hand on your side as you keep your eyes on his.

"and this shit... is it going to take you until the end of the second half?" he asks you, voice pitching as he holds back his laughter.

"yes, coach." your statement is simple, and you hold your mouth in a straight line as you await his response.

"alright, you're off the hook. have a good shit." he gives you a curt nod.

"thank you, coach." you nod back before letting your legs carry you inside and straight for the stairs. taking two stairs at once, you fly up them, running for the door to your changing room.

stumbling towards the bench in front of your name and number, you drop down onto it, knees wobbling under your weight. you release the longest breath you can, placing both hands on the edge of the bench beneath you in a poor attempt to ground yourself. your skin feels like it's on fire, and the sudden warmth after being outside for so long makes you start to overheat. you stand up, completely overwhelmed by the adrenaline, pulling your long sleeved top off as fast as you can. you push both of your socks down, trying to cool your skin as much as possible. your hands fan your face as you huff deep breaths in and out. pacing up and down the room, your mind races with everything Jamie Tartt; the way his hand gripped yours, and the way he held you up with just one arm around your waist, how dark his eyes looked when he caught you checking him out, and especially the way he looked so up close. his tanned skin looked smooth and soft, and the image of his strong fingers between yours makes your vision blur. you catch your bottom lip between your teeth, slowly lowering yourself back to your seat as you picture his face close to yours. you feel your mind beginning to drift even further, but you don't let it, sitting yourself down again and looking up at the ceiling.

"he's a prick, he's a prick, he's a prick," you repeat quietly over and over, pulling yourself away from the hot spiral your mind is approaching.

"y/n?!" you jump at the sound of Gia's loud voice interrupting your mantra, "Roy said you were shitting..."

"oh my god-" embarrassment hits you like a truck, hands flying up to cover your face.

"fucking hell, y/n. you're, like, bright red and topless... are you okay?"

"yeah, I mean, I don't know if it's the adrenaline or what, but, I don't think I can do any more today," your defeat clear in your weak voice, you drop your hands to your lap and look down at your fingers, pins and needles running through them as you recover from being in the cold.

"ew, okay, go home for today. I'll see you later, just get some rest, yeah?" you nod quickly, suddenly feeling a confusing nausea kicking in at the sheer memory of how Jamie's hard chest felt against your hand. as you shake the thought from your head, you feel the need to tell Gia: "I wasn't actually shitting, just so you know."

"jesus, y/n," she shakes her head at you, walking towards where you're sitting. she squats down in front of you, placing two hands on your knees and looking at you with caring eyes. "go home and take a nice cool bath, yeah? relax and calm down... and I just wanna say," her face goes from sweet to serious as she looks directly in your eyes, "the way you played today made me realise what an honour it is to be your captain. I haven't seen you like that since we were teenagers, y/n. each kick against that ball carried so much talent, and passion, and you were just having so much fun."

you give her a weak, lopsided smile, rolling your eyes slightly. she squeezes your knees before looking down and untying your boots for you; "Gia, you don't have to-"

"anything for my striker," she whispers to you with a wink, "I will literally do anything to keep you enjoying football the way you did today."

"I won't lie to you," you start, "training with Jamie definitely helped," you aren't proud to admit it, and you aren't trying to give him kudos for anything, but your constant quarreling added a new fuel to your old fire. even in simple drills, your motivation to win was doubled, and the satisfaction you felt whenever you beat Jamie was almost greater than winning a match -- but you would never admit all that to anybody.

"I can tell," Gia says, raising her eyebrows at you before pushing herself back, "now, get yourself an uber home. I'll see you later."

you do exactly that, getting straight into an uber without even changing out of your training kit. when you get home, you struggle up the stairs, your legs trying their hardest to keep you up. you start running your bath and pull off your muddy clothes, leaving them in a pile on the bathroom tiles. as you light your favourite candle, you stare into the flame. the adrenaline from training has worn off, but despite the exhaustion settling deep in your bones, you can still remember exactly how all of your heightened senses felt. during drills with Roy, every time your kick hit a goal post, your heart soared. even though you used to play that game with Gia all the time when you were in school, something about the way you held your breath as the ball floated through the air made it all the more rewarding. the suspense and the competition made your blood pump faster, Jamie being a key component to that feeling. you even found yourself clapping for him when he made an impressive kick, and he did the same for you. you don't take each other seriously, and maybe that's the secret to keeping football so fun.

after your bath, your body is entirely relaxed, the weightless feeling of the water bringing a sweet relief to your tired legs. wrapped in your towel, you head down the hallway towards you room. as you pass the stairwell you call a loud "hello?" down to the rest of the house, but there's no answer. with a satisfied smile, you continue into your room, dropping your towel. after grabbing your pyjama bottoms, you throw on a tank top before standing in front of your mirror. you take your time with your skincare as your hair dries, giving yourself some much-needed tlc. whilst staring at your reflection, you can't wipe the smile from your face; all the excitement and energy from today has transformed into pure contentment.

in your slippers, you skip down the stairs, heading straight to the kitchen. thank god for your lazy sunday takeouts, because all it takes is heating up some leftovers for you to have dinner set for the evening. you get comfortable on your small sofa, plate in hand, as you turn the tv on to an old episode of your favourite comfort show. kicking your feet up, you stretch your legs over the other couch cushion, feeling an ache in your muscles similar to those after you've just played a real match. the food warms your bones, and your laughter floods the room even though you could recite this episode from memory if asked to.

walking across the room to the kitchen, you drop your plate in the sink before opening the fridge, bending down as you study what you and Gia have in there. grabbing a cold juice pouch, you laugh at another joke on the television, piercing the straw through the plastic as you head back to the comfy couch. dropping yourself on it, you sigh to yourself, staring at the tv screen as your mind drifts again. a blush creeps up your face as slight embarrassment takes over your thoughts, remembering how Roy saw you checking Jamie out at training. Jamie noticing you doing it was bad, but it's somehow even worse that third person was just watching it all from above. the genuine smile you saw on Jamie's face was something you didn't think you'd ever get to witness with your own two eyes. when it was just you two mucking about during your practice drills, there were a few moments when his smile wasn't cocky, or at your expense, but he would just look genuinely proud of himself.

car headlights shine through the front window of the house, and you pause your show, leaning your head back against the arm of the couch. you crook your neck back and to the side, trying to see Gia walking in the door behind you. you hear chatter as she approaches, assuming Isaac is with her, and when she unlocks the door, you were right. behind her is Isaac, and you begin to smile until you see who they've brought home with them.

"what the fuck?" you sputter, quickly sitting up straight and running your hands over your tied-up hair. Jamie saunters in behind Isaac, ignoring you as he slips his shoes off at the door.

"how are you feeling now?" Gia asks sweetly, ignoring your shocked expression at the sight of Jamie Tartt standing in your living room. she drops herself into one of the bean bags across the couch, Isaac sitting one the one next to her.

"I was feeling great until now!" you exclaim, holding a hand out towards Jamie as you look between Gia and Isaac angrily. he's standing at the door with his arms crossed over chest, clearly unsure of what to do.

"Jamie, please come sit down," Gia beckons towards the sofa with a friendly smile, direclty contrasting your not-so-welcoming face.

"uh, where?" he asks, an unfamiliar shyness to his voice.

Gia raises her eyebrows at you, nodding her head towards your spread out legs. you huff and roll your eyes as you fold your legs beneath yourself, sitting criss-cross on the left side of the sofa. without saying anything, Jamie sheepishly walks over to you before sitting on the other cushion. suddenly, you regret ever buying the cozy two-seater, feeling Jamie's broad shoulders brush against yours as you both keep your arms crossed.

"so, we have gathered you here today to witness the joining of two lives," Isaac says with a serious voice, brow low as usual.

"Roy spoke to us after training today, basically proposing a bit of an idea for the two of you." Gia follows, and your eyes are stern as you flick them between her and Isaac. trying your best to look unfazed by Jamie's close proximity to you, the strong smell of his cologne makes that particularly difficult. it floods your senses, salty and fresh. it's the opposite of what you'd imagined, but it still suits him. you steal a glance at his man-spreaded legs, his black denim jeans tight around his thighs. you're not a big fan of his skinny jean look, but you really don't mind the way they hug his muscular legs.

Isaac continues; "Roy said that he thinks you two had a lot of fun training together today, and loved watching the flirty little rivalry you've got going on."

"woah!" you shout, holding your hands up in surrender, "we were not flirting."

"yeah, she was checking me out, not the other way around!" Jamie shakes his head and grimaces, pointing an accusatory finger at you.

"I wasn't checking you out," you groan, looking over at him, "you're the one who offered to kiss me!"

he scoffs at you, sitting up straight as he says: "that is not what happened." with raised eyebrows, he looks at Isaac and Gia, now pointing at them too.

"okay, whatever, I don't care who wants to kiss who," Gia interrupts your protests, "we all think that you two should train and practice together outside of regular training. so, instead of going to the gym after trainings, you continue doing drills and stuff together."

the silence which falls over the room is deafening, you and Jamie matching in expressions as you stare at your captains with your jaws slack.

"train... with him?" you say, utterly confused by the suggestion.

"instead of the gym? what about my gains? Isaac, come on, you can't be serious," Jamie holds his hands out, acting completely helpless.

"sorry bruv, you can still get your reps in whenever you want, but we think you guys can really help each other get motivated and stuff." Isaac tries to smile at the two of you, bearing his teeth in a wide grin. but when he's met with your bored faces, he soon drops the expression.

"the next few games we have are... important, of course, but the stakes aren't too high. after last week's win the women have nothing to worry about, and I mean, the guys seem to be doing just fine, so," Gia rambles, using her hands to emphasise her point. she sighs, dropping her hands in her lap as she slumps her shoulders; "y/n, I haven't seen you play the way you did today in years, and you said it yourself Jamie-"

"stop!" you yelp, interrupting her mid-sentence holding your hands up in front of you as if physically stopping her. while you bite your lip, considering their proposal, you turn your head to look at Jamie and to your surprise, his eyes are already on you. he blinks quickly, looking down at the ground and reaching a hand up to rub his chin. you scan his face, letting your eyes run down his torso before landing on the same place on the ground he seems to be staring at. fingers pulling nervously at the straps of your tank top, you chew on the inside of your cheeks. as you try to picture having to spend any more time alone with Jamie, you start shaking your head side-to-side. your eyes flick back up to Gia, a deep frown now appearing on your face; "no."

in your peripheral, you see Jamie's head snap to the side, eyes boring into the side of your face, but you can't make out his expression. Gia looks at you with a fed-up look in her eyes, and Isaac stays silent. you stare at your captain, emotionless, waiting for her to let you off the hook and send Jamie home. instead, he's the first one to say something, huffing at your words.

"pfft, why not?"

"why not? Jamie, you don't want to do this either," you spit out quickly, finally turning to look at him. your eyes meet, and you immediately notice how alert his eyes are, pupils blown wide.

"yeah, I mean, true... I just don't get why anyone wouldn't wanna spend time with me." he scoffs.

"jesus christ, Jamie," you roll your eyes at him, leaning back against the sofa and crossing your arms again. Isaac and Gia mirror you, both rolling their eyes at Jamie's narcissistic comment.

"listen, if I were getting paid to play football with a woman that would be a whole different story, but I'm not, so." with a shrug, he draws his mouth into a straight line.

"Jamie, your whole job is playing for Richmond," Isaac starts, "you get paid to train... what's the difference if you're training on your own or with y/n?" Isaac takes his explanation slow, squinting at Jamie as he does so.

"it's different 'cus..." Jamie replies, confident at first before his voice falters, his eyes darting around the room thinking of a valid reason. you stare at him expectantly, genuinely curious about what he'll come up with next, but he trails off, staying silent.

"oh! let me guess Jamie, it's because you're not into all that feminist shit, is that it? or is it because I won today? because I beat you, and you're too fucking insecure and egotistical to admit that sometimes you're not the only person out on that pitch who wants to win. how embarrassing for you," you say, standing up from where you're sitting and walking over to the kitchen in a huff. you keep your back turned to everyone as you stand at the sink, turning on the tap and running the water over your hands just so it looks like you're there with a purpose. the air is heavy as long seconds pass, and you're not sure exactly how long the room stays silent for.

"right," Jamie eventually sighs, slapping his hands on his thighs before pushing himself up from the sofa, "I'll be off then." you turn to face the room again, leaning against the kitchen counter.

"Jamie, wait," Gia tries, but he holds a hand up to her as he pouts with a shake of his head, moving towards the door and slipping his trainers on.

"I'll give you a lift," Isaac mutters, struggling his way out of the beanbag before following Jamie out of the front door, still in his slippers.

hands still gripping the counter, you stare down at your feet, only slightly embarrassed by your little jab at Jamie.

"y/n, what the fuck?" Gia snaps as soon as the door clicks shut.

okay, maybe you're more than just a bit embarrassed. you hear Isaac's car rumble to life in the driveway, and you can feel Gia's eyees burn into you. you're suddenly too shy to look up at her, feeling your cheeks turn hot.

"you literally told me you had fun with Jamie! what was that all about?" she first sounds confused before fading into a more concerned tone. the care in her voice makes you look up at her slowly. pushing yourself away from the counter, you lift a hand up to rub your tired eyes before pinching the bridge of your nose.

"I know," you sigh deeply, "I just don't want him to know that." the corner of your lips quirks up for a split, but no real smile breaks through.

Gia sighs too, moving over to the sofa and sitting down where Jamie had previously been. she stares at you, a knowing look in her eyes, before patting the space beside her. you look away from her briefly, eyes glancing at the television, which is still showing the paused image of your abandoned tv show. shuffling towards her, she opens her arms for you, and when you sit down on the couch you lean into her. letting out a deep breath, your mind flashes with thoughts of Jamie for what feels like the tenth time today; his strong fingers between yours, how big his hand felt around your waist, the goosebumps on his neck as he watched the coin flip. your eyes flutter as you imagine his lips, how soft they looked despite the cold air, and the sound of his voice close to your ear. whenever you found yourself close to him, shoulder-to-shoulder on both the pitch and the couch, he always felt so warm. he radiates heat and electricity, your blood running hot even just thinking about him. whether that's in a good way or a bad way, you're not too sure.

"you don't fancy him, do you?"

"oh my god, Gia, no!" you laugh at her question, slapping her leg playfully.

"awe," she coos, "that's a shame. because I kinda think he has a bit of a thing for you."

you shoot up, leaning as far away from her as humanly possible as if it would remove you from that thought completely. you stare at her with your eyebrows arched, a mix of shock and disgust pitting in your stomach.

"wh- oh my god, ew," you shake your head, eyes darting around the room at a rapid pace as you consider her words, blinking fast, "why would you even think that?"

"I can see the way he looks at you, y/n. anyone can see he at least wants to shag you," Gia shrugs as if what she's saying doesn't absolutely repulse you. "what?" she asks you with a chuckle when you just stare at her blankly, "I bet you calling him insecure made him violently hard, and that's why he left so fast."

an unhinged laugh bursts out of your mouth at that, a hand flying up to cover it; "violently?! jesus christ," you both laugh together, the tension in the air dissipating as you continue joking about the idea.

"I mean, Jamie is physically fit, yeah," you explain to her, "and who wouldn't wanna say they've slept with a famous footballer?"

"exactly! why do you think I'm with Isaac?" both of you chuckle before you continue, "but I just don't think us spending any more time together would do anyone any good. today was great and it was exhilarating and fun, but honestly, I think the bickering will only lead to worse."

"you really think so?" Gia's eyes turn soft as she sounds hopeful in her question, "I know he was rude to you at the restaurant, but like... just think about it, y/n, please? for me and Isaac? things have been so stagnant in our teams- good, but stagnant, and I really think it would look good for the coaches if we can get you two on board with this."

you stare into her pleading eyes, completely understanding why she's asking this from you. when you all elected Gia captain, she was the happiest you'd ever seen her. all weekend you heard her on the phone to every family member and friend she could reach, sharing her good news. at every training, she absolutely glows, and her eyes still tear up a bit when anyone casually calls her 'captain'. being able to share her passion for football through her role in the team even multiplied when her and Isaac started going out, and you really wish you still had the same spark for the sport. but spending one-on-one time with Jamie Tartt of all people? if he was literally any nicer to you, it would be an honour to train with someone you admire so much. but now that you know him just that little bit more, enduring any more frustration and anger-inducing strops from him would drain you more than the actual training.

"you never know, maybe he could surprise you," Gia suggests, almost reading your mind.

"he's nice to look at Gia, not nice to talk to." you sigh.

"I don't know about that, y/n, Isaac wouldn't be friends with him if he hadn't cleaned his act up."

"but he hasn't cleaned anything up with me. it really seems like he's just got something against me personally," you hang your head as you nervously fidget with your fingers. what Jamie said at Ola's got to you more than you'd care to admit, even to your best friend.

"give him a second chance, y/n. who knows, it might be fun?"

when you lie down in bed that night, you try to distract your mind with seemingly endless tiktoks, but your brain feels too busy to even just doom scroll. you place your phone on your bedside table, turning over and hugging the soft duvet closer to your chest. your mind races back and forth, the word 'fun' running circles through it. there's nothing fun about being disrespected by someone you once admired, but the thought of being able to shamelessly annoy that same person does sound quite enjoyable. you wouldn't mind getting the excuse to stare at his impressive build some more, that sounds quite fun, but your stomach cramps at the memory of Jamie catching you multiple times. he caught you staring at his arms, his shoulders, his lips. you feel like a mess, head dizzying at the mixed messages you're sending yourself.

after some deep breaths and counting an absurd amount of sheep, you finally manage to meet sleep, but when you wake up early the next morning, deep exhaustion hits you. after turning off your alarm as fast as you can, you yawn so wide your ears pop, groaning to yourself as you dangle your legs off the bed. the cold morning air hits your body as you further climb out of the duvet, and you groan as pain sets into your muscles. "fucking hell," you mutter to yourself, not expecting the first minutes of the day to be so strenuous already. dragging yourself from the bed, you shuffle towards your bedroom window, squinting as you pull the curtains open. the sky is overcast, but still bright, despite the autumn sun having only just risen. you lean your forehead against the window, hoping the slight condensation forces your body awake, but it isn't the glass which shocks you into being alert, it's Jamie standing outside talking to Isaac.

he's leaning against his car casually, the hood of his blue hoodie pulled over his head and tied tightly with the strings. unlike his usual obnoxious fashion sense, he's wearing dark, loose joggers and runners. you stare a little bit longer, quite enjoying the view, until you realise you have no idea why he's at your house again. reaching up, you unlatch your window, pushing it open and leaning over the windowsill. "good morning boys," you call down to them, interrupting their conversation. they both look around, looking for where your voice came from, "up here." you say flatly, waving an unenthusiastic hand.

"good morning!" Isaac chirps, genuinely in a good mood.

"nice hair!" Jamie says with a smirk on his face, and you curse to yourself as you duck out of the window quickly. you glance at the mirror next to your bed, seeing your pony tail hanging on for dear life as your hair has folded in on itself in your sleep. you tug the hair tie out of it, leaving your hair down and messy as you appear back in the window.

"what is this prick doing here?" you ask Isaac, and a sudden shiver runs over your body as the cold really starts to bite you.

"he's giving us a lift to work," Isaac replies.

"why?" you snap.

"because he's a nice person." Isaac snaps back, holding his hands out beside him.

"yeah, so hurry up, woman, don't make me late." Jamie snaps as he dismisses you with a wave of his hand. slamming the window shut, you move quickly between your room and the bathroom, getting ready as fast you possibly can. you decide to leave your hair down on your way to training, a new choice since you normally always have your hair tied up for training. dressed in simple yoga pants and a hoodie, you grab your phone and rush down stairs. your gym bag is exactly where you left it at the front door, and you don't care to check what's in it before picking it up and pulling open your front door.

Gia has now joined Isaac and Jamie at the latter's car as they all chat. it's more a heated discussion than a simple morning chat, but you choose to ignore it. Jamie faces you, still leaning against the side of his fancy car, whilst the other two stand with their backs to you. you let your eyes rake over Jamie properly this time, stunned by how good he manages to look in such a low-effort outfit. the bagginess contrasts his usual too-tight jeans and tops, and you quite enjoy knowing the muscles underneath his clothes without seeing them almost ripping their seams. when the door clicks closed behind you, Jamie's eyes flick away from your friends, landing on you. he blinks a few times, tipping his head back as he drags his eyes down your frame before coming back up to your face.

Jamie seems to be well aware you can see him staring, but he still doesn't tear his eyes away from yours. Gia and Isaac don't seem to notice him staring, continuing whatever explanation they're giving Jamie, but he's definitely not listening. time moves in slow motion as you stare at each other. his fingers come up to untie the string of his hood, and you see his jaw clench as his neck becomes visible. waiting patiently for his next move, your in a bit of a daze, never breaking eye contact with him, even when he stuffs his hands into the pocket at the front of his light blue hoodie. Jamie licks his bottom lip before pulling it between his teeth, and your head tilts down slightly as your eyes focus on the movement. he lifts his lips into a smirk, the change in expression making you quickly look back up at his eyes.

"nice hair," he finally speaks, his tone more genuine than mocking like it was when you were in the window. this comment pulls Isaac and Gia out of their conversation, turning to see you standing on your front step, bag over your shoulder. "oh, finally. let's go!" Gia chirps as she begins walking around the car, completely oblivious as to what she just missed between you and Jamie. Isaac follows, walking to the other side to get in the passenger seat. despite the small smile on your face, you roll your eyes, pushing at the wooden door to make sure it's locked before walking towards the car. you walk right up to Jamie, looking up at him with your head cocked to the side; "thank you, Jamie. nice hoodie."

giving you a tight-lipped smile, he mirrors your tilted head, letting his eyes flick down to your lips. quickly darting his eyes back up to yours, his pupils completely dilate, regretting his seemingly accidental glance. smiling at the reflex, you furrow your brows teasingly, waiting for him to say something, anything, a sarcastic comment or stupid joke, but you get nothing in response. instead, Jamie awkwardly looks down at his shoes, pushing himself off his car and stepping aside to pull open his door. "wait," you say, hand involuntarily reachiing out and wrapping around his wrist, stopping him in his tracks. you gulp nervously, dropping his arm almost as quickly as you grabbed it, before sighing. "I just wanted to say sorry for what I said yesterday, I didn't mean it."

"oh, I'm sorry, y/n... would you mind just quickly remindin' me what exactly you said?" Jamie crosses his arms as he pushes your buttons.

"look, I'm apologising because I'm trying to be nice to you so please don't make this harder than it already is." you sigh, placing a hand on your hip and popping it.

"sorry love, I don't think I can," he leans closer to you, and the heat of your breaths so close together makes a little puff of steam in the cold air.

huffing an annoyed sigh through your nose, you suck in your cheeks before saying: "Jamie," you start, and his eyes are on yours expectantly, "I'm very sorry for calling you insecure,"

"and?" he drawls, not making any move to distance himself from you, and you almost lose your thought at the smell of his amazing cologne again.

"insecure and egotistical," you add, turning to look up at your bedroom window simply so you don't have to look at Jamie. the two of you stand in silence for a few long seconds, and your eyes finally meet his again as you wait for his response. "okay, thank you, y/n." his voice is the same low tone as it was on the pitch yesterday, when you had your hand pressed to his chest, and the sound pulls your stomach into an excited twist. he doesn't drop your eye contact, so you decide to be the one to do it, grunting at him as you pull open the car door, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach. the sound of his low laugh is cut off as you drop into his low car, pulling the door closed behind you.

squished behind the driver's seat, you're face is hidden behind your gym bag. you're grateful for it, not brave enough to face either Gia nor Jamie in the rearview mirror. you settle your gaze out the window, the pout on your lips remaining there during the whole drive. you don't actually feel bad for what you said to Jamie last night, but if apologising means getting Gia off your back, then it's worth it. you want her to excel as captain, and you want to help her do that any way you can, even if that means spending more time with Jamie than you'd like to.

when the car finally pulls into AFC Richmond's car park, you're the last to get out. Gia and Isaac rushed inside to see your coaches, leaving you and Jamie behind.

"coaches duties, I guess," you mutter as you watch them race into the training center, saying it more to yourself than to Jamie. he has one hand resting on the roof of his car and the other reaching out towards you. with a grimace plastered on your face, you look up at him with an eyebrow raised, puzzled by his gesture; "what?" you snap.

"so much for feminism," Jamie groans, rolling his eyes and sighing before jutting his hand closer to you. as if he's a child trying to show you a snail on his hand, you move back, shaking your head at him with the same confusion on your face. ducking his head down with another sigh, he drops his hand for a moment, smacking it against his leg.

"your bag," he says, clearly irritated, before bringing his hand out again, "can I carry your bag for you?"

"what the fuck?" you laugh loudly, attracting the attention of other staff making their way into the building. Jamie lifts his hand to give them a curt wave, sending them an awkward smile. as you clutch your stomach with laughter, you turn away from Jamie, making your way towards the door.

"what?" he whines, following close in your step, "I'm being serious! I'm trynna be nice here."

"Jamie, since when is it feminist to assume a lady needs her bag carried?" you push through the doors, smiling to yourself, knowing this is driving him nuts.

glancing back at him, you see him walking with his shoulder slumped, a bewildered look on his face; "I'm so confused," his words are surprisingly genuine, no more bitter edge to his tone.

"Jamie," you smile at him, stopping in the middle of the hallway to face him, "I'm fucking with you. but, no, over my dead body will I ever let you touch my stuff." you continue walking, speeding up your pace as you approach the staircase which leads to the women's locker room.

"you say that, y/n, but I was literally on your couch last night so..."

with your back still turned to him, you hold your tongue, simply rolling your eyes as you choose not to bite back.

"woah, Jamie, you went home with her last night?" is the last thing you hear someone say before sprinting up the stairs, again, ignoring it. whatever Jamie replies to that question would only make you angry, so you decide to tune it out and be the bigger person.

as you make your way down another hallway where the ground is covered in fake grass, you bump into Roy. your eyes lighten up at the sight of him, raising a hand to wave at him, but when you see his smile turn smug, you drop your arm. you feel your cheeks go hot as you remember the words you two parted with yesterday, and your wide smile shrinks into a polite, tight-lipped one.

"how did your shit go?" Roy speaks when you meet each other in the middle of your path. you sigh, ignoring his question and looking at him with stern eyes; "do you think I should train with Jamie?" your voice cracks in the middle of your sentence, not because you're going to cry but because you just don't know what to do about the situation. Roy fills his cheeks with air before blowing out slowly, extremely slowly. he stares down the hallway for so long that you glance over your shoulder to make sure there's not a ghost standing there.

"Roy, I'm going to be late to training if-" you whisper, but he's quick to interrupt you.

"yes."

"yeah? really?"

"yes."

"why?" you challenge his deadpan answers, crossing your arms over your chest and furrowing your brow at him.

taking a deep breath in through his nose, you're actually quite nervous for his answer. you're well aware they haven't always been the best of friends, and Isaac's told you all about their old rivalry, but he's you also know they've managed to move on from that by now.

"because..." he starts, dragging the word out in a growl, "as much as I hate to say this, I think he needs real competition with someone in order to be good at football."

"why do I have to be that competition? can't you just use someone from his own team,"

"sadly, I can't personally fight him, and he's too much of a team player now."

"so I'm gonna be his fucking punching bag so you guys can score goals?" you suddenly start getting warm, and not in the nice way. "Gia said this would somehow help her as our captain but now you're saying I'm basically just doing Jamie a favour," you continue.

"not entirely," Roy breathes out, staring at you with the hope that you'll let it go and agree, but you put up more of a fight.

"tell me what's going on."

"fine." he grunts, "first of all, Ted's made Jamie all nice and kind by giving him a second chance, so he's not as intense on the field as he used to be. sometimes they need him to be a prick, just not to his own teammates. so, after seeing you guys rile each other up at training yesterday I thought it could be a good idea to have you bring back that fire in him."

with your mouth dropped open, you stare up at Roy while he speak completely bewildered by his explanation. you consider protesting, since this is probably the most consecutive words he's ever said to you, you let him finish.

"second, Gia thinks you might need the same kind of thing," he stutters through his statement, clearly wary of your response. but when he sees your unwavering expression, he continues; "I mean, I do see where she's coming from. she wants you to enjoy football again, and she knows you have fun with the more aggressive parts of it,"

"fun... fuck's sake," you mumble to yourself, pinching the bridge of your nose.

Roy ignores your interjection; "y/n, I think in asking you to do her a favour, Gia is also doing you one. she wants you to play the best you can, and you want her to succeed the best she can. don't even think about Tartt in all of this, he'll be just fine without or without you."

you chew the inside of your cheeks, staring up at Roy with a complete lack of emotion. your mind, however, is running on high, and you feel like an overheating motor as you think over his points. you want to ask what Jamie thinks about this whole idea, but you decide against it; this isn't for Jamie, this is for Gia. you want her to be the best captain she can be, and you want to be the best footballer you can be. you know your passion has worn off with the stress of playing for Richmond, and as much as you don't want to agree that this will help you, you know it's true. you know very well that you need this as much as Gia needs you, and you hate to think of having to leave the team just because you couldn't do your best on the pitch. the deep need for football has dissipated over the years, but your want for it has returned.

"fine."

———

yaaay part two! finally! i can't wait for the all the juicy shit coming up! i hope you enjoyed reading, i'm always open for any and all feedback -- my ask is open!

also sorry if there's typos i didn't get to properly correct the second part much love <3

[softspaceboibrian]

The Heart Wants What It Wants || Jamie Tartt

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x Y/N where Y/N works at AFC Richmond || I used she/her pronouns, but there is no actual physical description, so the pronouns can be switched with whatever anyone wants or prefers!

Characters: Jamie Tartt; Keeley Jones and Rebecca Welton (Y/N's best friends); Sam Obisanya, Isaac McAdoo, Colin Hughes and Dani Rojas (Jamie's support team); Roy (being his usual grumpy self).

Summary: when Y/N goes into Rebecca's office to have her usual morning chat with her best friends, she doesn't expect it to result in a very messy confession from her crush.

Warnings: bad language, like a lot. slight sexual harassment. Roy being harsh with Jamie. Jamie being all over the place with his feelings. fluff, a lot of pining and crushing. just bad writing, really.

WC: 8355 (it's kinda long, I know... but I didn't know where to stop! sorry!)

A/N: This is my first time writing for JAmie or any Ted Lasso character in general. I hadn't written anything in months, and I guess it shows. but I was so sad that there weren't enough Jamie fics on here that I thought I could just write one of my own. hopefully people like it! I'm in the middle of my exam session, but if you have any requests or suggestions, feel free to write me!

this gif is completely unrelated, i just love phil dunstan

“Come in” Rebecca’s voice was clear and loud as always, even through the closed door. As you walked in, you took in the smell of hot tea permeating the door – definitely something you could always count on.

You greeted both Rebecca and Keeley, before plopping down on the sofa right in front of the big windows looking out onto the field. You looked out for a moment, noticing the team making their way outside to finally begin practice. You had been working at AFC Richmond for almost a year now, all thanks to Miss Keeley fucking Jones, obviously. Ever since you first day there, everyone had immediately started treating you as if you had always been part of the family, especially Rebecca. “If Keeley likes you so much, it must definitely mean something.” That was her excuse when she invited you out for drinks with the two of them on the second day. “Also, there’s only so many women working at AFC Richmond, we have to stick together, don’t we?” And the rest was history, as some author would say. Even the team had liked you since the get-go. Some more than others. There should be a disclaimer here: you had never cared for football, in any of its forms. But Keeley had been so persuading, making the job sound like a party. And she wasn’t lying. Being with the team was more fun than you could have ever imagined. Yes, some of them were self-centred, and some were self-centred pricks, even. But somehow, you had taken a liking to all of them. And now, after an entire year of working there, you knew them so well that she could even make out who was who all the way from Rebecca’s office.

You were so lost in your own thoughts, that when Keeley talked, you almost jumped out of her seat. “Babes, is everything alright?” Her voice was kind as always. “You seem off today.”

“Everything is fine.” You fixed yourself, turning around so to face both of your friends.

You smiled, or rather you forced yourself to make your smile feel as real as possible. But when you met Rebecca’s gaze you froze. She was holding one of those shortbread biscuits that Ted brought her in every morning and that you only had the pleasure to taste once and, well, you completely understood why Rebecca loved them so much. “I call bullshit.”

“What?”

“I said I call bullshit.” The woman put the last remaining bit of biscuit in the small, pink cardboard box, as to save it for later, and then made her way on the couch with you and Keeley. “You have been off for, well, quite a few days now. And I love that you’re an independent woman and everything, but Keeley and I are your friends. Actually, I would like to believe that we are your best friends. We care for you and we would very much appreciate it if you would trust us enough to come to us with your problems and thoughts.”

“Yeah, babes. You know we’re always here for you.” Keeley moved closer to you and leaned against the back of the couch.

You sighed, burying your face in your hands. You had wanted to talk with them for a while now, but you were always too afraid they wouldn’t care about it, or you were too embarrassed about how they might react to it. But this time it was them that asked you to tell them. And they seemed truly interested in knowing what was going on in your mind.

“Chop, chop, out with it.” Rebecca let her heels fall to the ground and set herself comfortably in the corner of the couch. Yeah, well, as comfortable as that extremely fitted pencil skirt gave her permission to.

You bit your lip for a moment, gathering all the courage you had. “It’s stupid, really.” You tried to laugh it off, hoping that they would just let it go.

But they didn’t. “It’s not stupid if it’s making you feel like this.” Keeley said, putting a hand on yours.

“Fine.” You sighed, looking off in front of you. “I think I may have feelings for Jamie.” You blurted out as quickly as you could.

“Our Jamie? Like, Jamie Tartt?” Keeley asked.

“I know it’s stupid. I shouldn’t like him, right? I know you think it’s stupid. I know you think he’s a prick, and you’re not wrong. I know that he’s a prick. Fuck, that makes me hate myself even more. How could I like a prick? Well, he had changed a bit, and now he-s a bit less of a prick. But still, he’s Jamie fucking Tartt, he’s probably one of the hottest footballers out there, in any way possible. He could fucking have whoever he wanted. Hell, he could have a fucking model. I’m sure he had model. He had you, Keels. And I’m just me. I fucking hate that I’m feeling this.” You started rambling on aimlessly, putting out there in only a few seconds all the fears and insecurities you had been holding in for the past who knows how long.

“Hey, love. Just, wait a minute.” Rebecca’s voice broke your train of thoughts, thankfully just in time, or who knows where you could’ve ended. “Let’s just calm down a moment, okay?”

“It’s just-” You sighed. “I hate that I’m feeling these feelings. I don’t want to feel them. Not for him. I don-t want to be his latest conquest that he’s going to move on from and forget as soon as he finds someone more interesting. I don’t want this. But I can’t help it. I… Fuck, I feel like I’m back in middle school. Shit, shit, shit. How old am I? 12? No, I’m not. I’m 25 years old, for fuck’s sake. I should fall for proper man. Not people like him.” Your eyes filled up with tears, which you tried to hide as best as you could, even though you knew that the other two would notice them, nonetheless.

And they did. Rebecca and Keeley shared a quick glance, before sliding even closer to you, both immediately wrapping their arms around your figure. “Listen, babes. You said it yourself. I’ve been with Jamie, and he was in his top prick form back then. Now he’s… he’s changing. I don’t know if it’s the training with Roy or if it’s Ted finally rubbing off on him, but he’s no longer the dickhead I dumped almost two years ago.”

“She’s right. He has changed.” Rebecca agreed with Keeley. “Also, you cannot tell your heart what it should and shouldn’t feel. It will only cause you more pain, and we definitely don’t want that.” The woman had this motherly instinct that you had always loved. She always knew what to say to make you feel better, or at least less shitty about yourself. “And remember, you could never do worse than me. I was married to the king of the shitheads.” She added, which made both you and Keeley laugh.

“Okay, let’s do this.” Keeley got up and ran to the door, only to lock it and run back to the couch. “If it’s alright with Rebecca, we’re going to take the morning off to talk, just the three of us.”

“Sounds perfect to me. I really didn’t have much to do anyway.” Rebecca was a great liar. You knew she probably had so many documents to read through and to sign. But she always made time to help you with your problems. And that’s why you loved her so much. “Is that right with you, love?”

You didn’t even need to say anything. You barely nodded, and next thing you knew, the three of you were sitting on the couch with no shoes on, a warm cup of tea each and a big chunky blanket on your legs. You never really thought they would be this open with you. Yes, they had made it clear ever since the beginning that they liked you and that they cared for you. But you had never thought that you could go to them for something like that and they would do all of that for you. But they did.

“Okay, let’s start with one simple question: are you two talking? Or, I don’t know, did you go on a date?” Keeley’s question was very straightforward and made completely sense. However, the answer wasn’t as easy to give.

“Well, we haven’t really gone on like a proper date. But we did spend quite a lot of time together last week.” You looked at the other two and you could feel them asking for more information with just their eyes. “It didn’t start as the best of situations…”

------------------------------ FLASHBACK ------------------------------

You didn’t really want to go out that night. It wasn’t really your thing. You usually spent your nights at home, reading a book or watching a movie. Or, if you were lucky, you would go out with Keeley and Rebecca for dinner and drinks, which you loved. What you didn’t love was going out for drinks with people you weren’t as comfortable with. But you had never really learnt how to say no to people, so when your old high school friend – who had moved to America for college and you hadn’t heard from since – messaged you on Instagram, saying that she was back in London for a few days and wanted to go out with you to “catch up”, you couldn’t really bring yourself to decline the offer or make up an excuse. So, you just agreed and made plans to meet up with her in front of a very busy and very fancy place downtown. You hated clubs, especially busy one, but even more you hated going to new places without people you knew. But you knew the girl, in a way. You were really close in high school, so things shouldn’t be too bad, right?

“So, you’re working for a football club! Never thought it would happen!” The girl shouted over the loud music which you were already hating with all your guts. But you just pulled through it.

“Yeah, it’s a good job.” You hated having to raise your voice so much, but it was the least you could do if you wanted to have a conversation with her.

“Do you know any famous footballer?”

“I mean, I know the boys from the team. I suppose they’re famous now. But yeah.”

“Would you introduce me to any of them?”

There it was. You had been talking with her for half an hour and, knowing how she was back in high school, you had been wondering how she hadn’t yet asked you about the guys. A small part of you really wanted to believe that she had changed and that she had stopped sleeping around with guys just because they were hot. But apparently, you were wrong. “Well, it’s complicated. They’re in the middle of the Premier season right now, and most of them are training really hard hoping to be rostered for their national teams. Plus, you’re only going to be in town for a few days, so that wouldn’t really work.”

“I wouldn’t mind moving my flight back for a footballer.” She smirked.

“Maybe next time.” You fake-smiled. “Also, who would want to go out with a football player? Most of them are self-centred assholes who only care about winning.”

“But they are sexy and they have money.”

“But you’re studying law in an ivy league college, you could be the one with money in the relationship.”

“Nah, I don’t really care about that. If a hot guy with money wanted to be with me, I would literally give everything up.” She said, as if that was the most obvious answer. Now you were remembering why you never reached out to her after high school was over.

You spent another half hour listening to her blabbering about something you didn’t really care about. And you could tell that she knew, but didn’t say anything. That was how things had always been between the two of you back in school: she was the popular one, with guys running after her, and her constantly cancelling plans that you two had made to go on a date with a different guy, while you spent your afternoons with the drama club, putting on the next show, to which she was always invited but she never came. It wasn’t all bad. You actually had good times with her. You spent a lot of time over at her house, and you were almost part of her family. But once you were no longer forced to see each other every single day at school, it didn’t take long for you to realise you were completely different. So, you just stopped looking for each other, making plans or going out. That’s why, when the messages stopped coming altogether, it didn’t really hurt you, since you were the first that had started to back out from that friendship. But years had passed and you had really hoped she had grown out of that phase of her life. But you were wrong. People never change, that was what you said to yourself as you were absentmindedly nodding to whatever she was saying now.

“Listen, Y/N, do you mind if I leave you alone here for a moment? There’s a guy over there that has been eyeing me for a while now and, I don’t know, I have this feeling I should go over there.” That was her usual excuse. I have this feeling. As if sexual craving could be described as an actual feeling. But you didn’t care, you actually wouldn’t mind to spend a few minutes by yourself. So, you just told her to go. And she did. Not a single “are you sure you don’t mind” nor an “it will be quick, I promise”. She simply picked all her stuff up and left.

And then you were alone.

You thought about leaving a couple of times, but you thought it would be rude because what would happen if she came back and you weren’t there?

So, you just remained seated there, in the small booth, waiting. And waiting. You looked around, studying the crowd, and hoping that she would just come back, or at least text you to let you know her intentions for the rest of the night. But that message never came. And you waited there, alone.

Until, after almost twenty minutes, a random man approached you. He had to have been at least 15 years older than you. He was dressed all fancy, a black blazer and jeans, a white shirt with the first couple of buttons left open to show a few sparse grey hairs on his chest, as if that was something that all women found sexy; I mean, who did he think he was? Roy Kent? He walked over to your table and leaned on it to get closer to you. “Is this seat taken?”

The first thing that hit you was the almost nauseating amount of perfume and aftershave, closely followed by the stench of cigarette and alcohol as soon as he opened his mouth. “I’m waiting for a friend.” You replied, hoping that would be enough to send him away.

“I’ve noticed you’ve been sitting here alone for quite some time now.” He smiled, and you wanted to throw up. “And I don’t she’s coming back. She and that boy looked very intimate if you know what I mean.”

That comment sent shivers down your spine. How long had he been looking at you? “I’m waiting for another friend of ours.” You said, hoping that he would buy it.

He moved closer to you. “Let me wait with you. I wouldn’t want to leave such a pretty girl out here on her own.”

You hated when people called you a girl. You were a grown woman, for god’s sake! But you hated it even more when that comment came from creepy old men that were nonchalantly flirting with you.

“They should be here any minute now.” You replied quickly. “And I actually prefer to sit alone.”

“Nonsense! Let me keep you company!” He smirked, sliding even closer to you. You were on the verge of tears, feeling this awful sensation in your stomach. You felt like you were going to throw up, and you weren’t sure whether it was because of his terrible taste in perfumes, the horrible stench of smoke, or just his presence in general. You wanted to just get up and get away, but it was as if your legs had forgotten how to move. You tried to insist, telling him that you were going to meet them outside, but he wouldn’t let you go. He started moving his hand, and you knew that, if you didn’t move, he would put it on your thigh. But, with tears pooling at the corners of your eyes, your body completely froze.

“Y/N!” A voice called your name. You turned around to look at the source. Your vision was hazy from the tears, and the strobe lights weren’t exactly helping you in that moment. “I’m sorry I’m late, I couldn’t find a spot to park me car.” He walked over to your table and waited for you to do or say something to sit next to you.

“You’re Jamie fucking Tartt!” The old man exclaimed. “Fuck, man. You’re great! My mates and I don’t really like Richmond, but you’re the best player in the team. You and that Oby- Obe-, you know, the Nigerian guy.”

“Yeah, cheers, man.” Jamie replied, taking a seat next to you. “Now, would you mind leaving us alone?”

“Is she your date?” The man asked, and you could tell that he was confused because why would a star like Jamie Tartt go out with a normal girl like you?

“Do you have a problem?”

“No, no!” The old man finally stood up from the table. “You enjoy her.” He smirked and gave him a wink, before looking at you up and down for the last time and eventually leave.

You finally could feel your body relax again when your attention was caught by Jamie talking. “What a fucking creep.” He shook his head, before finally looking at you. “Are you alright? Did he do anything to you?”

You shook your head. “I think you got here just in time.” You smiled at him, almost feeling guilty for probably having ruined his night.

“Were you here alone?”

“Well, not really. I was here with a friend but she left with a guy.” You stopped, quickly looking around. “But I don’t think she’s coming back.”

“Some kind of friend.” He sighed, still looking at you, as if he were studying you, trying to understand if everything was truly okay, trying to assess the situation. “Do you want to leave?”

“What?”

“I said, do you want to go out, maybe grab a bite?” He raised his voice, thinking that you might have not heard him over the loud music.

“Don’t worry, I’m okay. You can go back to your evening if you want. I’m fine, I swear.”

“I was here on me own.”

“You go to clubs alone?”

“Well, yeah.” He looked at you for a moment. “Listen, really, I don’t have anything to do here. And in any case, I would much rather spend time with you. So, if you want to leave and do something actually funny instead of waiting for some shitty friend to hopefully come back, then count me in.”

------------------------- END OF FLASHBACK -------------------------

“Did you go with him?” Keeley asked, looking at you as if she was watching the latest episode of a soap opera, completely hooked up to the story.

“We spent the entire night together.” You said shyly.

“Doing what?” You had never seen Rebecca so shocked and interested in a story in a while.

“We ate in a chicken shop; we stayed there talking for a while and then we took a walk.”

“How long did you stay out for?”

You could feel both Keeley’s and Rebecca’s eyes on you, demanding an answer, wanting to know more, to know everything. “Well, we took the sunrise as our cue to go home.”

“Babes! You’re telling me that you stayed up all night talking with Jamie?” Keeley squealed, jumping on her knees. “Like, you found topics to talk about for, what, 7? 8 hours?”

“It wasn’t that difficult. I didn’t even have to force it.”

“What did you talk about?” Asked Rebecca. And all of a sudden, the almost 50-year-old and 30-year-old women in front of you turned back into their high school personas and you almost wanted to laugh at how adorably funny that scene was.

“Well, a bit of everything, you know. Our lives, where we grew up, our favourite things, favourite food, favourite movie, favourite city, the books that have impacted us the most, the cities that we dream of visiting one day. Normal stuff.”

Keeley looked at you, in complete shock. “You talked about books. With Jamie. How?”

“He said that he had noticed I like to read and asked me about my favourite book. I told him and then asked him the same thing. And he told me.” You replied, as if that was obvious. But it was only then that you remember that Keeley had been with Jamie in the past and, if she was that shocked, it must have meant that, when they were together, he didn’t read. Possibly at all.

“Babes, remember when I told you he had changed since I had broken up with him, right? Well, that’s an understatement. When we were together, it was fun, but we didn’t really talk about that kind of stuff. He was much more superficial. I don’t think he never really asked me what my favourite food was. And the fact that he was taking an interest in all of those things about you, well, it definitely means something. I wouldn’t take that for granted.” Hearing Keeley, someone you trusted with all of your heart, someone you loved and looked up to, someone that truly knew who you were talking about, saying all of those things, made you feel things. You didn’t know what those things meant, but they were things you hadn’t felt in a long time. And for the first time in days, you were finally accepting the idea of having feelings for Jamie Tartt.

After a few moments of silence, Rebecca asked you “Was that the only time you spent time together?”

“Well, no. I mean, we’ve been talking basically every single day. He sends me a good morning text almost every day, and we talk a lot at night. Sometimes he calls me.”

“Okay, okay. That’s good.” Rebecca said, almost as if she was an investigator gather all the evidence. “But you didn’t answer my question: did you go out another time?”

You immediately felt heat rising to your cheeks. “We didn’t really go out.” You looked at the two women in silence for a moment. “Last night he… ehm… he showed up to my place.”

“What?” They both almost screamed at the same time.

------------------------------ FLASHBACK ------------------------------

You had just finished putting on your pyjamas after a long warm shower. You still had to decide what you wanted to eat, something you always dreaded because, as much as you loved cooking, you hated preparing food for one. You started making your way down the stairs and to the kitchen when your doorbell rang. You weren’t really expecting anyone, so the sound left you confused. You looked through the peephole before even saying anything, so that if it was someone you didn’t know, you could jut pretend you weren’t at home. But, when you looked through it, you were surprised to see Jamie standing right outside of your door.

You immediately took a look at yourself in the mirror right beside the door, trying to make yourself look at least presentable, before finally opening the door. When Jamie’s entire figure came into view, you noticed the food boxes in his hands. “Jamie?”

“Hi, Y/N! Ehm, I’m sorry to barge in on you like this but… ehm… I thought we could spend some time together, you know?” Was Jamie blushing?

You stood there, a soft smile on your lips, looking at the man in front of you. “Sure.” You giggled, moving to open the door even more, as a way to let him in.

“I’m sorry, I should have texted or called. That was stupid. If you’re busy I can just-”

You cut him off. “Jamie. I’m not busy. You can come in. I just wasn’t expecting visitors, so the house is, well, it’s not tidy.” You take a step forward to take some of the boxes off of him. “What’s with all of this food? Did you rob a supermarket?” You laughed, nodding your head as a sign for him to follow you, before making your way to the kitchen.

“No!” He laughed, and suddenly you felt this weird sensation in your stomach. “I didn’t know what you were craving and so I got everything that you told me you liked.” He said, while putting the boxes on the counter. “I got us a pizza to share, because you said you’re not a huge fan, but that you like to eat it while watching movies. I also got us kebabs because they’re always good, and sushi because why not. Oh, and I also got us those spicy Korean rice thingies that you said you love so much. What’s their name? Tee- To-”

You laughed as he struggled to say the word. “Tteokbokki.”

“Yeah, those.” He smiled, putting his hands on his sides.

“Just a question.” You walked around the kitchen gathering cutlery and plates to eat. “How many people did you think were going to be here? There’s enough food to feed an army.”

He looked at you and then the food, before bursting out laughing. “I told you! I didn’t know what you were craving. And I wanted to do something nice for you, but I overdid it.”

You put the plates on the counter and turned to look at him. “It’s okay, I appreciate it anyways.” You smiled. “But why would you wanted to do this for me? It’s not my birthday or anything.”

“I just… I had a very good time with you the other night.” Was Jamie blushing? Again? “And I was really in the mood to watch a good movie. So, who better than you to watch it with.”

You smiled, trying to hide the blushing coming onto your cheeks as well by turning your attention to the food on the counter. “Did you have a movie in mind?” You asked, while putting the different foods on the plates.

“You said that you really like Dead Poets Society, right? And that you think everyone should watch it at least once in their lifetime, right? So, I thought, since I’ve never seen it, we could, I don’t know, watch it together. If you want to, obviously.” He waited for you to plate the food to pick a couple of plates up and follow you into the living room.

“That actually sounds like a perfect plan, Mr Tartt.” You smiled, while taking a seat on the couch, waiting for him to join you.

------------------------- END OF FLASHBACK -------------------------

“Fucking hell, that’s adorable!” Keeley exclaimed. “He never did that for me! When he showed up uninvited, it was usually because he wanted to have sex.”

“Well, this is good!” Rebecca joined in. “He has changed. He listened to what you told him, he remembered your favourite food and your favourite movie. And before you say something like ‘but that’s not a big dead!’, yes it fucking is. It is a huge deal. Men aren’t always reliable. Rupert never was, at least. I vividly remember telling him my favourite drink at least a dozen times. And every single time he would get me something completely different. At the beginning I was too afraid to say anything, so I just drank it. But then I started to speak up. And still, he didn’t remember.”

“Yeah, okay, but him remembering that I like pizza only when watching movie doesn’t mean he feels anything for me.” You said, throwing your head back.

“I’m sorry, babes, didn’t you say that he told you that he wanted to spend time with you?” Keeley asked. “You said it yourself: he came to your place with all the food you had told him you liked and suggested to watch your favourite movie together because he had had a good time with you and wanted to do that again.”

“He decided to spend time with you rather than going out with other people or spend the night texting some random girl on dating apps.” Added Rebecca. “He chose to be with you.”

“I suppose you’re right.” You sighed. “I still don’t think he has feelings for me, though.”

“Whatever, babes.” Keeley took a sip out of her mug, before refocusing on you. “What happened next? Did you watch the movie?”

“Yes, we did.” You smiled at the memory. “He got emotional at the end. I’m not saying that he cried, but he definitely had glossy eyes by the time of the ‘O Captain, my Captain’ scene.”

“Which means he feels comfortable enough to show his emotions in front of you.” Rebecca noted. “And what happened next? Did he leave or did you spend another night talking?” She smirked, trying to make fun of you in a friendly way, almost mom-like.

“Well, he stayed a while longer.” You looked at the two women. “We talked a little about the movie, he told me what he thought of it, we discussed a little about why I thought it is a very important and still relevant movie, and he agreed with me. At first, I have to be honest, I thought he was just agreeing with me to not make me feel bad. But then he added to my argument and I stood corrected. He had truly understood the point of the movie and of my thoughts. For the first time in, gosh, I don’t even know how long, I felt seen, listened and understood by someone that wasn’t you two or Sam.”

Keeley brought a hand to her chest. “I have conflicted feelings because, by the way you’re talking, I want to tell you to just run out of here and into this man’s arms; but at the same time, every now and then, I remember you’re talking about Jamie, and it feels so weird because he’s so different from what I remember him to be like.” She explained. “Which is good, but kind of unsettling.”

Rebecca nodded along with what Keeley said, before eventually turning once again to face you. “What happened after you talked?”

“We decided to watch Modern Family, you know, to cheer ourselves up after the movie.”

“And?” Asked in unison the two women.

“And nothing.”

“I call bullshit.” Said Rebecca.

“Agreed.” Added Keeley. “What aren’t you telling us?”

“Nothing!”

“That’s not true!” They once again spoke in unison, which was starting to become quite weird.

“Nothing happened. We just… fell asleep.” You almost murmured those last words, almost too scared to say it out loud in front of them.

“I’m sorry, what?” Asked Rebecca, who had obviously heard and just wanted you to say it again out loud.

“We fell asleep!” You shouted. And you were so glad that Rebecca’s office was so high up and far from others. “As we were watching the show, he started leaning into me. At first, he laid his head on my shoulder, and then, somehow, we ended up with his head in my lap and my hands in his hair.” You could feel your cheeks burning up.

The two women shared a quick look, before turning back to you, huge smiles on their faces. “When did he fall asleep?” Asked Keeley.

“I don’t know.” You looked down at your own hands. “I fell asleep as well. I don’t know how or when, but when I woke up, it was like 3 in the morning, and we were lying on the couch. He had his head on my stomach and an arm draped over my waists.”

“What did you do?”

“Nothing.” You were fidgeting with your bracelet, too embarrassed to look up and meet your friends’ eyes. “I didn’t do anything. I didn’t want to do anything. I didn’t want him to go away.” For some reason your eyes started filling up with tears.

“Hey, babes. It’s all right.”

“No, it’s not!” You almost shouted, tears finally falling down your face. “It’s not fucking okay. I hate feeling like this.”

“Love, hey, just… wait a second. Take a deep breath.” Rebecca moved closer and wrapped her arms around you. “Why do you hate it?”

“I don’t know. I’m feeling all these things for someone that doesn’t even like me back.”

“You don’t know that, Y/N.” Keeley moved closer as well, taking your hand in hers and leaning her head against yours. “I mean, you’re the coolest person I know, you’re fucking smart and interesting, and you’re fit as fuck. I think most of the team has at least a tiny crush on you.” She smiled, hoping to cheer you up. But that didn’t work.

“Listen, love.” Rebecca squeezed you, before pulling away slightly. “As that song says, the heart wants what it wants. I know feeling like this is terrible, but there’s only one thing that you can really do, and that’s talking to him.”

“But what if he says that he was just being a good friend? What if I misread every single thing he has done and said to me up until now?”

“And what if you haven’t?” Keeley asked. “Finding you at that club was completely random, pure luck. But he then chose to spend the entire night with you. Just like he chose to send you a good morning text every single day, and he chose to come and spend the evening with you. Also, I’m almost 100% sure that he woke up as well during the night, but didn’t say anything because he didn’t want to go, just like you didn’t want him to leave.” Keeley brushed a rogue strand of hair out of your face. “I know it’s hard, but you have to act.”

“But I’m scared.”

“Which means that you care.” Rebecca smiled. “You care about him and about your relationship.”

You looked at the two women in silence for a few moments. You wanted to cry, and you wanted to scream. You wanted to run out of there and straight to Jamie. You wanted to hug Keeley and Rebecca ad tell them how much you loved them. But all you could do in that moment was smile and be glad for the wonderful friends you had. “So, I should go and talk to him?”

“Yes.” Keeley smiled.

“And you should do it right now.” Said Rebecca, standing up from the couch. “The team is going back inside, which could be a good moment for you to swoop in and talk with Jamie.” She seamlessly slipped back in her high heels and fixed her blouse. “And if anyone has anything to say about it, they will have to come to me. I’m the owner of this club, after all.” She winked.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The team had just made their way to the changing room, ready to hear Roy giving them “pointers”, or rather making sure they knew every little thing they had done wrong. But Jamie didn’t really care about that. Jamie knew that he had played like shit, but he couldn’t help it. His head was someplace else.

“Oi, Tartt!” Roy’s voice echoed in the room, and everyone’s head turned to look at the man sitting in front of his changing station. “What the fuck were you thinking, uh? You fucked all the assists. The team was constantly looking for you, and you were nowhere to be found!”

Jamie’s eyes remained low on the ground. “’m sorry, coach.” His voice was soft. “I’ll do better next time.”

His teammates couldn’t believe what they were seeing. Somehow, in the span of 24 hours, Jamie had lost all of his confidence. They looked at him and almost couldn’t recognise him. And the worst past was that no one really knew what to do with him, how to talk to him, how to cheer him up. Because that’s the thing with teams: you’re a family, you’re all extremely close, but you’re still a bunch of men that don’t know how to handle emotions and how to talk about their feelings. So, they just bottle everything up and hope that, sooner or later, it will just go away.

But right now, looking at Jamie, Sam felt compelled by something to just stand up and walk over to him, to say something. “Is everything all right?”

Sam’s voice startled Jamie, who was so deep in his thoughts he had almost forgotten he was at the clubhouse. “Uh?” Jamie looked up and was met by Sam’s concerned look. “No, yeah, everything is fine.”

“It don’t look like it, bruv.” Isaac joined in the conversation.

Sam took a seat next to Jamie. “You don’t have to talk to us about whatever is on your mind. We’re not going to force you. Just know that we’re here for you.”

“Sì, muchacho. We’re a familia.” Dani and Colin walked over as well, almost forming a barrier between him and the rest of the room, creating a safe space for him.

No one said anything for a few moments, most of them unsure of how to act, of what to say to him. They wanted to ask him, to help him, but they had no idea how. So, they all remained quiet, until Jamie broke the silence. “I feel so stupid.” Jamie’s voice was low. “I… I feel like a middle schooler.”

“What do you mean?” Colin asked.

Sam immediately turned to look at Jamie. “Did something happen with your dad?” And Jamie could feel the worry in Sam’s voice.

“No, no, I haven’t talked with me dad since Wembley.” He shook his head, rubbing his face. “No, I… You’re going to laugh…” He looked up, but all he saw was seriously interested faces, the faces of friends that were genuinely concerned for him. “I have a crush…” He almost whispered, but it was still loud enough for them to hear. They all shared a quick look amongst themselves, before turning to look again at the man sitting before them. “I feel so stupid because, usually, I have all this confidence with women, right? I’m so sure about me self that I don’t worry about the possibility of a rejection. It doesn’t affect me, usually…”

Sam nodded along with everything that Jamie said, as if he could relate to every little detail. “But with this woman in particular, you’re scared.”

Isaac asked the question that everyone wanted to ask. “Who is this woman?”

Jamie looked up from the ground, meeting everyone’s eyes. He could tell that his friends wanted to help him, but something was stopping him, almost too afraid to admit he had feelings for her, too scared that they would laugh in his face and say that she deserved better than him.

“Muchacho, you’re a beautiful man, and every woman would be lucky to be with you.” Dani always had this way of talking that could give confidence even to the shiest and most introverted person in the world.

“No, you don’t understand. This woman is different from the others.” He sighed. “She’s not a top model or an aspiring actress that wants to be with me because I’m famous. She’s… she’s different.” Jamie started fidgeting with the ends of his shoelaces. “And I’m different. I’m not the same person I was two years ago, I know that. And I think that’s why I’m so scared. Like, what if she doesn’t like me? What if she still thinks I’m a prick? Uh?”

“Listen, boyo. You said it yourself; you have changed. And if this woman doesn’t like your new you, then too bad for her.” Colin took a seat next to Jamie, opposite to Sam. “But if you truly like her, you should tell her. Don’t let your fear get in the way of your happiness, okay?”

“Yeah, like Selena Gomez said in her song, the heart wants what it wants.” Smiled Dani.

Jamie looked at those people around him, and for a moment he felt all the guilt for how he had treated them two years before rise to the top. Did they forget everything he had done to them? Did they forget how bad he had made them feel? He had treated them so poorly, and yet, now they were there, next to him, showing care and interest in how he was feeling. “Thank you, boys.” He smiled softly.

“You know we’re here.” Sam smiled, giving him a small push with the shoulder. “We’re family.”

“Yeah, bruv.” Isaac added. “But are you going to tell us who this woman is or not?”

However, their conversation was cut short by the door to the changing room opening, and Y/N walking in, looking around, clearly searching for someone. And that was when the boys realised Jamie didn’t need to tell them anything, because as soon as he saw her, he stood up. He fixed his hair and immediately took a step forward. None of them said anything. They just remained quiet and watched the scene unfold in front of their eyes.

“Jamie.” You smile once you finally met his eyes.

“Y/N” He replied, softly, taking another step towards her.

“Do you… do you think we could talk for a moment? Alone?” She said quietly, but the silence in the room made it extremely complicated for her not to be heard by everyone.

Jamie nodded. “Yeah, sure.”

You smiled, turning around to exit the changing room. Jamie took a deep breath, turning quickly to look at the four guys standing a few steps away from him. He nodded to them, and they nodded to him in return, as a way to say ‘you got this’ or ‘go get her’. So, he took one more deep breath, and followed her outside.

Once he stepped into the corridor, he noticed Keeley and Rebecca standing in the middle of it, looking at the two of them. Keeley smiled, which gave Jamie a boost of confidence, Whereas Rebecca was looking at him in such an intimidating way that immediately sent shivers running down his spine. He knew they were there for you, and he knew how much they cared for you, so it wasn’t difficult for him to understand what Rebecca’s gaze meant: ‘break her heart and I’ll break you’.

He greeted the two women with a quick nod, before realising you were still walking down the corridor. “Wait up, Y/N!” He said, jogging after you. “Where are we going?”

“Boot room. It’s the quietest place in here.” You looked at him, noticing his expression, as if he wanted to say something. “I already asked Will to leave us alone in there.” You replied, quickly grabbing him by his hand and pulling him through the doorway.

“You always think about everything.” He chuckled, getting into the room. He never really understood when or how that room had become like a sort of therapy room for the team, where most of them went when they needed to get something off of their chest or just be alone, but couldn’t leave the clubhouse. That place stank like hell. But he was glad nonetheless for the privacy. “You had your supporters with you as well, uh?” He smiled.

“Yeah.” You laughed under your breath. “They are actually the ones that forced me to come and talk to you.”

“Should I be scared, then?”

“No! No.” You shake your head. “I don’t think so.” You started pacing around the room, trying to give order to all the things you had in your head at the moment.

“Is everything alright?” Jamie looked at you, slightly worried.

You looked at him, taking a deep breath. “Yes.” You nodded. “Just give me a moment because I haven’t really thought about what I want to say to you. Or rather, how I want to say it to you.”

Jamie nodded, taking a step towards you and catching your hand before you stepped away again. “Do you mind if I go first, then?”

You looked at him, surprise painted all over your face. You didn’t know what to say, so you simply nodded, waiting for him to talk.

“Okay, so, first of all, I wanted to tell you that last night was… well, I really enjoyed spending time with you, and I really wish we could do it more often.” He smiled, squeezing your hand as a way to catch your attention. “And then to the difficult part... Okay. The boys told me to just be me self. But it’s difficult, you know? Because, like, I am always me self, but when I’m with you, I’m different from how I am with the others. Not in the sense that I’m not truly me self, but in the sense that, when I’m with you, I’m me self even more than usual.” He stopped, looking down. “Sorry, I didn’t really have anything prepared either.” He chuckles.

You couldn’t help but smile. “Go on, you’re doing great.” You said, trying to look at him in the eyes.

“What I’m trying to say is that when I’m with you, I feel like I’m truly me self. Like I’m the most authentic version of me. And I like it. I want to be like that always. But I feel like I can only be like that when I’m with you.” He looks at you. “I lied before. I don’t want to be with you more often.” You stopped and looked at him completely confused. “I want to be with you as much as I can. I want to be with you every fucking day.” You giggled, feeling the blood rushing up your neck and to your cheeks. “I want to make lunch for you. Well, no, okay. I want to learn how to make lunch for you. I want to take you out to dinner. And I also want to order in and watch a movie on a couch like we did last night. I want you to play with me hair because, fuck, that’s the most relaxing shit ever.” You bit your bottom lip, trying to contain all the happiness that you were feeling in that moment. “I want to go out with our friends and be able to show you off. I want to hold your hand as we walk down the street.”

“Jamie…”

“Wait a second.” He interrupted you, pulling you even closer. “I want you to wear my jersey at matches. And to cheer for me. And I want to kiss you whenever we win a match. In front of everyone. I want to go out and celebrate with the team, and while we’re there, I want to hold you close while we talk with them, and then be able to just walk home together and celebrate just the two of us. And I don’t mean have sex. I mean, that would be fun, but I meant like having a party just the two of us. Drinking, and dancing and laughing. Or we don’t have to go home, and we can just walk around town all night, like we did that time.” He became all serious all of a sudden. “I want to be able to protect you from creepy old men. Actually, no. That wouldn’t be necessary because you would never need to go out by yourself ever again.”

“Jamie, I…”

“Wait, I’m not done.” He interrupted you once more. “I want to be able to sleep over at your place and you over at mine. I want us to buy toothbrushes to leave at the other’s house. I want to wake up next to you like we did today, but I want that every single day. I want to have me clothes at your place and your clothes at mine. I want to drive Roy mad by telling him last minute that I’m sleeping over at your place, so he has to come all the way there. And after I’m done training with him, I want to stop at a cafe as I get back home and I want to buy your favourite latte, so that you can wake up to the smell of warm coffee every day.”

“Jamie!” You shouted, trying to stop him from talking.

“What?”

“Just-” Your hands found their way to the back of his head, as your eyes remained fixed on his. “Just kiss me, will you?” You laughed, before pulling him down towards you.

When your lips finally crashed against one another, you could feel the tension you had been holding in your stomach finally releasing. You pushed yourself on your tiptoes, as Jamie’s hands slowly and softly found their resting place on the small of your back, helping you up, and pulling you closer to his chest. Your hands played with his hair, and in that moment, you were sure he could feel your heart beating like crazy in your chest.

“So…” He whisper while pulling slightly away, only to press his forehead against yours. “Did you want to say something?”

You kept your eyes closed, too afraid to open them and realise that it was only just a dream. “I think you said everything.” You chuckled, trying to get some air back in your lungs.

“Well, if you wanted to say something…”

“Jamie.”

“What?”

“I love you.”

A/N: sorry, this was so long! so, if you read it all the way through, then thank you! please, feel free to leave me any kind of feedback and don't forget to send me suggestions or requests if you have them! thank you again! ily <3

[scoatneyhall]

This news has people saying they'd like to see more from AFC Richmond (obviously) including the creation of the women's team. This is kind of a nightmare idea for me, because one thing I, as a football nerd, need people to understand about the concept of an AFC Richmond Women's Team is that they absolutely definitely already should have had one during seasons 1-3 of the show? Which made the pitch from Keeley in the s3 finale montage land SUPER badly for me. Like, a nice idea, easily conveyed, but nope.

Because the "football canon" of the situation is that every established Premier League club now has an affiliated women's team. And like yeah, Richmond aren't very good. But most other clubs going down the ladder into the Championship, League One, etc, also have women's teams. Richmond, when the show started, had been in the Prem without relegation for a long time. They would not be the only Prem club without a womens team!!! They would have been constantly called out for it, it would have been a huge criticism and pressure point.

(Side note: same goes for a youth academy - clubs are required to have one. So you can imagine that off-screen, AFC Richmond is operating an academy, a Development/ Reserve men's team, and a women's team, it just has nothing to do with the squad Ted coaches and their training may well be housed elsewhere.)

The WSL (womens top tier in the UK) doesn't have as many teams in it as the Prem due to structure (12 vs the Prem's 20), so the levels the men's and women's teams play at can vary drastically within the same club. Not all Prem clubs have the womens team in the WSL. But any club you (or the TL writers) may have compared to Richmond, or based them on? They do have a women's team, whether they play at the top level or not.

So for me, the moment with Keeley works okay as a "don't question it" thing in the context of a harmless series finale montage, but it doesn't work as something to build new stories off, at least not in the simplistic way it was presented. Because any extension of the Ted Lasso Universe, or a Ted Lasso season 4, that would possibly incorporate the "starting of a women's team" would be the show going SO far outside the realm of football realism that it feel like a major contrast to how the show has approached the football element before - including like, what division or tier a newly launched team would even be allowed to start in, and all that. You're not meant to dig into the moment in the finale, just process it as a nice, fuzzy concept. But if there is more show to come, with a plot line that tackles the idea pitched in the finale, it could never match the level of football realism that was applied to the show before, because they've invented a totally fake situation that just doesn't work like that. They would be lowering their own bar. I know that many elements of TL, like Ted coaching, are already extremely fake, but their dedication to most of what counts is very good and very specific. Following through on what the finale implied about the women's team would be a drop in football realism from their existing standards and I am suuuuper not interested in that happening. It would be a quality drop for sure.

This is a bit of a rant and I am possibly the only fan who cared about this, but that Keeley and Rebecca scene was honestly one of the worst finale moments for me just because it implies something soooo wroooong.

HOWEVER, there's a pretty easy fix, and it would be cool if they went in this direction: the only reasonable explanation is that Rupert ran the women's team into the ground/never funded it, just met the bare minimum requirements, and they were currently playing below FA level, like in the 5th tier with only semi-pro players who don't get a professional wage - basically hobby players, and Keeley’s pitch was about reviving them and getting promoted up the tiers ASAP, Welcome to Wrexham style, with new funding, recruiting etc. Sucks that they got no attention from Rebecca before now but they may not have had money to spare for it during season 2 or before Rebecca sold shares in the club... dealing with that, and the fact that Rebecca had to knowingly leave them on the back burner and neglect them... that could be interesting. There's a story to be had about the women's team, don't get me wrong, but it isn't as simple an idea as the finale implied and that the fans have since run with.

[yelena-bellova]

Heartfirst: A Ted Lasso Story - Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine: People Watching

Plot: The Greyhounds take another hit in Amsterdam, and a night out brings about revelation and realization for Y/n.

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: language, discussion of child neglect

A/N: AMSTERDAM!! This is the one that really ties the whole thing together and sets up the rest of the series. I think it’s also my favorite so far. Very little of any other characters (sorry to my Jamie girls) but I promise it pays off ☺️

Enjoy!!

(Yes, this chapter is titled after the Conan Grey song. It fit too perfectly)

————————

The Amsterdam match, while not counting for anything, was a tremendous defeat.

The Greyhounds lost to Ajax, 5-0, unable to score a single goal against the Dutch. The boys hung on the field despondent, the home crowd booing and taunting them as loud as they could.

Y/n watched from the suite, seated between Keeley and Higgins, her eyes drifting across the crowd. Rivalry between fans had never bothered her, until Richmond had become her club. Now she was feeling every insult as if it were directed at her.

“Rebecca,” Marjolein, a high-up at AFC Ajax took the chair next to the blonde, “My apologies. Now, you’ve come all the way to Amsterdam and we at Ajax have been such rude hosts.”

The woman gestured to the scoreboard that the foursome couldn’t bear to do more than glance at.

“Marjolein, you’ve been more than gracious,” Rebecca replied, “Especially given the circumstances.”

The cruelty towards the Greyhounds had been particularly hard to handle because it all tied back to the golden boy. Zava. The signs, the banners, the cheers against them…without the prick, apparently AFC Richmond was worthless.

As the whistle blew, the match officially ended and the teams headed off the field. Y/n, Keeley, Higgins and Rebecca stood to their feet.

“Till next time,” Rebecca thanked and shook Marjolein’s hand. Keeley and Y/n followed suit.

“Truly was an honor to play here at the Johan Croyff Arena,” Higgins complimented.

Marjolein touched her hands to her chest, “No. The honor is ours completely. But it is pronounced Johan Cruijff.”

“Oh,” Higgins nodded, “Still.”

Left to themselves, the foursome listened to the stadium chant the words to Three Little Birds as it played over the speakers. Salt in the wound that was still actively bleeding.

“This song’s depressing,” Rebecca muttered before downing the last of her champagne.

Higgins gagged, his tell-tale sign that he was uncomfortable. Y/n put her hand on his shoulder and took it upon herself to lead the group out. When the boys came off the pitch, her job began.

Higgins, Keeley and Y/n went to the locker room, the two women waiting outside as Higgins collected who they needed.

“I hate him,” Y/n complained, leaned against a wall, staring up at the bright florescent lights, “I hope a storm comes through and just wrecks that avocado farm.”

Keeley managed a snort while pacing the hall, she was tense about something other than the match.

Y/n peeked over at her boss, “You good?”

“Yeah,” Keeley said quickly, picking at her nails a little before she stopped in front of Y/n, “I have something I need to tell you.”

Barely opening her mouth to ask what it was, Y/n was stopped by Higgins emerging from the locker room, Jan Maas and Roy in tow.

“Let’s get this over with,” Roy grunted, walking alongside Higgins down the hall.

“If you’re gonna fire me,” Y/n looked back at Keeley, “Do it now.”

“No,” Keeley replied, hurrying to catch up, “It can wait.”

They stood to the side with Higgins as Jan Maas spoke in his native tongue, his tone surpassed the language barrier. The team were hurting.

Eventually, the interviewer turned to the coaching side. “And so, Roy Kent,” he began, “Don’t you think Richmond’s objectively poor performance is due to the fact that you’re nothing without Zava?”

Y/n inhaled, holding her breath after, “Here we go…”

“Who cares?” Roy replied, “It’s a fucking friendly. A friendly is a pretend match. This is a pretend conversation. You’re a pretend person with a pretend job. And I’m having a really hard time pretending to give a shit.”

If Zava didn’t give them enough headlines to clean up, Roy certainly did.

Will passed them in the hallway with armfuls of bags, whispering hellos to Keeley and Y/n, before Rebecca returned.

“Okay, a night out in Amsterdam it is,” she said quietly, “Let’s make the best of it. What’s the plan?”

“Ooh, I’m spoken for, I’m afraid,” Higgins replied, “It’s my first time in Amsterdam and I have a date with someone special in the red-light district.”

Rebecca, Keeley and Y/n watched their co-worker leave, staring in confusion.

“Nah,” they all said in harmony. There was no way.

“Just us, then,” Rebecca smiled at the two women.

Between the loss and her general stance on spending time together outside of work, Y/n already had her excuse prepared. “I’m exhausted,” she said, “I’m just gonna order dinner and turn in early.”

Keeley’s nervous smile returned as Rebecca turned to her expectantly, “I’d love to-“

“That’s a quick cancellation,” Rebecca replied.

“How’d you know I was gonna cancel?” Keeley asked.

“Because there’s a certain note in your vocal range that you only ever hit when you’re being preemptively apologetic,” Rebecca explained, glancing over to Y/n, “Am I right?”

Y/n scrunched her face at both her bosses, landing on Keeley. “Just a…little.”

“Come on,” Rebecca continued, “Out with it.”

“All right,” Keeley sighed, “Apparently, tonight is the best aurora borealis ever. Like it’s the aurora ‘boreal-iest.’ In Norway.”

Rebecca nodded understandingly while Y/n tilted her head. “How are you getting to Norway?”

Keeley ever-so-slightly shifted between feet, “And Jack and her plane are waiting for me at the airport right now,” she looked nervously to her employee, “That’s what I wanted to tell you.”

Y/n’s mouth opened and closed, her mind trying desperately to find words opposite to what she truly wanted to say. Keeley. Jack. Keeley and Jack. A thing. The boss and the boss-boss. What could go wrong? Everything.

Luckily, Rebecca spoke first. “Subtle,” she smiled at her friend, “And amazing.”

“Yeah, that’s,” Y/n’s total discomfort with the situation cut off the signal to her brain. She awkwardly made a fist and raised it, “Great. So great.”

Keeley was so in her own world, no doubt one that sat on a Dutch runway, she didn’t notice Y/n’s terrible performance.

“Go,” Rebecca nodded toward the end of the hall.

“I promise I’ll make it up to you,” Keeley grabbed Rebecca’s hands.

“Yes, you will,” the older blonde replied.

“Oh,” Keeley caught Jan Maas heading down the hall, interview completed, “Great job, Jan.”

“Yes, seriously,” Y/n added, “Thank you so much.”

The Dutch man smiled at the two and gave a wave.

“And, Roy,” Keeley called to her ex, “Thank you again for doing this.”

“Yeah,” Roy nodded, “Anytime.”

Keeley squeezed Rebecca’s arm, “I love you.”

“I love you,” Rebecca repeated.

“I love you,” Keeley grabbed Y/n’s hands, “And there’s nothing you can do about it.”

Y/n forced a laugh, nothing was actually funny at the moment, and watched as Keeley ran down the hall, Norway bound.

Rebecca, having spent enough time with Y/n, could sense her unease. “What are you thinking this very moment?”

“I’m watching my career get blown up because of a stupid night sky,” Y/n grinned, her eyes following Keeley’s fluffy pink coat bounce up and down.

Roy left the interviewer, coming to stand between the two women. It gave him a prime spot to watch his ex-girlfriend bound out. “Where’s she going?”

“Somewhere that believes they deserve her,” Rebecca replied, letting the thinly veiled comment smack Roy. She touched Y/n’s arm in goodbye before leaving the same way Keeley had.

Y/n let out a sigh, her and Roy turning to one another in silent resignation over separate matters. Y/n’s eye caught on the poster beside them, her face shifting with disgust.

Zava.

Roy turned and faced it, a small shrine to the legend’s short stint at AFC Ajax, and pounded his fist against it. It fell to the floor where Roy promptly landed a few kicks before casually walking off.

Y/n looked down the hall to where the interviewer was still filming, watching in shock as Roy stalked off.

“We’ll pay for that,” Y/n smiled.

“No, we won’t,” Roy called out.

Sneering once more at Zava’s arrogant grin, Y/n marched off toward the exit, ready for the day to be over.

—————————

Of course, by the time she got back to her hotel, it was barely 6PM. There was a whole evening to kill.

Y/n ordered room service, snacking as she scrolled the social media reactions to the match. When it became fruitless trying to find anything positive, she set her phone down on her nightstand and grabbed the tv remote instead.

She flipped between stations, finding most of the programming to be in Dutch. Eventually, she settled on the hotel’s channel that showcased their amenities and the city’s activities.

Y/n dropped the remote in shock, “Oh my gosh.”

With a Dutch overdub, a very out-of-fashion Keeley described some feature the hotel rooms had.

Y/n laughed, covering her mouth as she watched her boss over-exaggeratedly move around the screen. The sight was bringing her thoughts on Keeley back around to a more positive place.

It was eating at her, though, Keeley and Jack. Both of them were perfectly lovely, and Y/n had been witness to their natural chemistry. But dating the person that financed your company? That could decide at the drop of a hat to pack you up and dissolve everything you’d worked for?

Not that Jack would do that. Y/n reminded herself that the woman was level-headed and genuinely believed in Keeley’s vision. But there was always the great big “…what if?”

Y/n ran a hand through her hair, sitting on the edge of her bed. How could anyone be comfortable taking such risks with their career?

Deciding that she’d spiral if she stayed in her hotel room any longer, Y/n went to her suitcase and grabbed a change of clothes. She threw on her sweater and jeans, collected her wallet, phone and coat, and headed out the door.

She felt a twinge of guilt, telling Rebecca she was staying in and leaving the woman to fend for herself. But it wasn’t enough remorse to get Y/n to send a text.

Once she reached the lobby, she had to pass through the lounge to get to the exit. She quickly stepped back behind a wall when she spotted the entire team seated together, in deep conversation. Y/n couldn’t turn down another invitation, nor did she want to answer any questions, good-natured as they may be. She waited until a bellboy came through with a full luggage cart, hurrying alongside the suitcases that formed a perfect shield.

In the clear, Y/n stepped out into the evening air, inhaling deeply. She didn’t know where she was going, but she was going to enjoy herself. If nothing else, she was going to leave saying that she’d spent a night out in Amsterdam.

She wandered down to a busier part, not so stupid to think that as a single woman she could roam the city freely. In the more touristy section, there were buskers, much like in London. They provided a pleasant soundtrack as Y/n weaved through the crowds, searching for the first place she wanted to stop. Eventually, she spotted a street vendor, selling coffees and pastries, and decided that was as good as anything else.

Y/n walked until she found an empty bench, claiming it for herself. She ate her pastry, sipped her coffee and watched the crowd, listened to the chatter of the people passing by. There was something about being in a new city that electrified her, it was the same feeling she’d had when she’d first arrived in London. Everything was fresh and exciting and full of possibilities, even if she didn’t take any of them.

“And here-“

A familiar voice broke through Y/n’s thoughts. She traced it to find Jamie jogging down the cobblestone street.

“Is the most beautiful girl,” Jamie announced, running in place in front of Y/n and gesturing to her, “In all of Amsterdam!”

Spotting Y/n a grin, Jamie went on his way, leaving her laughing as he left. Ten seconds later, a well-worn Roy stopped to catch his breath.

Y/n smirked, knowing that Jamie was exhausting him. She lifted her leg to show her sneakers, “You want me to-“

“No,” Roy panted, keeping one eye on Jamie, “Don’t give him any more fucking energy.”

Roy took off once more after his protege. Y/n watched the two men disappear into the night, smiling and shaking her head.

With nothing else to do, she decided to call her sister. Her and Caylee had a standing catch-up each Sunday and she wasn’t going to miss it.

The dial rang twice before it picked up, “Hey.”

Y/n smiled at the sound of the familiar voice, “Guess where I am?”

“Where?”

“Sitting along a canal in Amsterdam, sipping a coffee, surrounded by people I don’t know.”

“Look at you,” Caylee cheered, “Being all spontaneous and shit.”

With a full mouth, Y/n laughed. “I mean, I knew I’d have the time. Not sure that counts.”

“Still, it’s good to know you’re out. You with anyone?”

“No,” Y/n said, watching one of the boats float down the canal, “Just me.”

Caylee’s silence was deafening, and predicted. By them both.

“So not your boss, who you said keeps inviting you places?” Caylee asked.

Y/n chuckled, “My boss is in Norway right now.”

“And not your other boss who, quite frankly, sounds fucking amazing?”

Y/n sighed, thinking of Rebecca’s earlier invitation. “She…had plans.”

“Not the coach who home invaded you to deliver fresh baked cookies?”

“No,” Y/n was starting to squirm under Caylee’s interrogation, “And they were biscuits.”

“And not the ridiculously hot footballer who’s basically just dropped himself in your lap?”

Y/n pinched the bridge of her nose. Jamie had texted her multiple suggestions on how to spend her night in the city. She’d felt bad ignoring them.

“It’s not-“

“Yeah, I know,” Caylee cut her off, “It’s not like that. That’s not the important part of what I’m saying.”

“What are you saying?”

“You’ve got all these people who are jumping to be around you and you keep pushing them away, and quite frankly, it’s kind of ridiculous.”

Her tongue poking her cheek in frustration, Y/n let her free hand fall to her lap. “Why is it ridiculous?”

“Because you’ve got no reason to be doing it,” Caylee said, no doubt with a shrug. Y/n was inhaling to argue back when she was cut off again. “You’ve got every reason to. I do too. Except these people actually want to be with you. They’re fucking proving it every Sunday night you call me and tell me how you had to dodge another invitation to a birthday party or another drink after a match…”

Y/n felt backed into a metaphorical corner, all too exposed. She kept searching for some comeback, some solid point to make, but couldn’t find one.

“It’s a lot more complicated than that, Caylee,” she said, trying to steady her voice.

“It’s really not,” her sister replied.

“Yes, it is,” Y/n’s tone jumped, “You make it sound like all I have to do is go out for a coffee with my boss and all my issues are magically solved.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.” Caylee, to her credit, didn’t drop her even tone.

“That’s exactly what you’re saying,” Y/n retorted, her brain and her mouth working at different speeds, “Y-you’re saying that I should— I-I should jus-just let them into my life and-“

“When are you going to stop punishing everybody else for what Mom and Dad did to us?”

Y/n’s breath caught in her chest and her stammers stuck to her throat. The truth could paralyze you like that.

Caylee didn’t speak, letting the question wash over her sister. Eventually, after watching someone self-destruct for long enough, subtlety was useless. Sometimes you had to hurt them to help them heal.

“I love you,” Caylee said softly, “But you deserve a better life than this. The only thing standing in the way…”

The sentence didn’t need to be finished. Y/n knew.

“You can hate me if you want.”

Y/n chortled, looking down at her coffee cup. “I’ve tried. Doesn’t work.”

Caylee hummed, her smile somehow vocalized as well.

“I love you,” Y/n returned, “And I’m…sorry. For everything.”

“Yeah, that’s another thing you need to stop doing,” Caylee pointed out, “Stop apologizing for our shitty childhood. You didn’t do anything.”

“Yeah, well, you’re my baby sister,” Y/n sniffled, trying to stop the tears before they’d even formed, “Bit of a habit, I’m afraid.”

“Hey, I turned out fine,” Caylee chuckled, “Boyfriend, job, friends…I’m happy. I just want the same for you.”

Y/n smiled, she was so proud of her sister. She’d built her own life, and had found an inner peace regarding their childhood that Y/n had yet to discover. She wasn’t envious, she longed to understand how Caylee had done it. How she seemed to be able to pack up their parent’s negligence in a box and stick it under her bed. It was all Y/n had wanted since moving to London.

“Well, not that this isn’t fun, getting a verbal finger wagging,” Y/n sighed, “But-“

“Go,” Caylee urged, “You’ll never be in Amsterdam again.”

Y/n furrowed her brows, “I might.”

A sisterly silence crackled between them.

“You’ll never be in Amsterdam again,” Caylee grinned, imagining her tightly-wound sister in a city of such debauchery.

Y/n laughed, “Probably not.”

“I love you,” Caylee repeated, “Really.”

“I love you too,” Y/n echoed, “I’ll call you Sunday.”

“I’ll be here.”

Without another word, the siblings hung up, returning to their corners of the world.

Y/n took a breath, looking down at her coffee as if it held all the answers. She couldn’t very well sit on the damn bench all night, not after that conversation. She needed to do something.

Amsterdam. Tulips. That made sense. She needed to see tulips in their native soil.

Y/n searched the map on her phone and found a nearby garden, less than a half mile’s walk away. She could do that no problem.

On the way over, her thoughts managed to leave her alone. The weight of what Caylee’d said hadn’t fully landed. Weaving between tourists and dodging the drunken ones was certainly enough to keep Y/n occupied. She could keep herself in semi-excitement about her destination.

Upon arriving and paying for admission, she found the gardens to be surprisingly quiet. It was close to closing time and a fair share of parties were heading out the way she was coming.

Y/n strolled through the greenhouse. She found the path to the outer section, the pebbles crunching under her sneakers as she followed the signs with floral markers. Her head stayed quiet.

The sprawling tulip patch was stunning. The marketplace ones Y/n had bought and placed in her kitchen window didn’t do the real thing justice. These bloomed with the kind of radiance that only came with being in the place they truly belonged.

Y/n tried to admire them, but had never been more aware of her solitude. There were families strolling past, couples gazing at the flowers, hand in hand. The bustle of the Amsterdam streets had melted away, the peaceful silence of the gardens provided no escape from one’s thoughts.

She’d been at Richmond four months, growing more and more pleased with the job each day. Except it wasn’t the work that made her happy. She didn’t get a pit in her stomach at the thought of exchanging emails with some sneaker company. She didn’t feel jolts of electricity down her fingers from scrolling Twitter to see how a press conference was received.

It was the matches that thrilled her. Sitting in the owner’s box at Nelson Road. Being squished between Keeley and Rebecca and Higgins. Watching the team run up and down the pitch. Cheering and screaming when one of the boys scored a goal. That was what made her happy.

The tears built as a supercut of moments played in Y/n’s mind. The team, inviting her out after nearly every match, genuinely disappointed each time she declined. Keeley, clawing and scratching her way into Y/n’s life, desperately trying to be a friend. Rebecca, as intimidating as she was, constantly praising Y/n on her talents, always encouraging her. Ted, offering time and time again to be there for her, to welcome her into their fold. Jamie, texting her a full fucking itinerary for a night he wouldn’t even be there for. Helping her find an apartment. Listening to her talk about her shitty childhood.

Being there for her.

They all wanted to be there for her.

And she was too fucking scared to let them.

Y/n sniffled, her eyes so blurred that the tulips turned to watercolor blobs.

“Ahem.”

She turned to her right, a grey haired man taking slow steps toward her, pulling something from his jacket.

“Here you go, dear” he said, offering her a handkerchief.

“Oh,” Y/n tried to collect herself, inevitably failing and taking the cloth, “Thank you.”

“No need,” the elderly man held up a hand, he spoke with a thick Dutch accent. “It is easy to recognize a broken heart.”

“Oh, no,” she denied as she dried her eyes. She tried to give a small smile, “I’m just a little lonely. It’ll pass.”

“Ah,” he came to stand beside her, facing the tulips, “I would not say that.”

Y/n stayed silent, sensing the stranger had more to say.

“Loneliness…it is like a warning. A wave lapping at the shores,” he smoothed his hand over the air, “It grows a little bigger, and it starts to hit the shore. And out in the distance, more begin to build. But still,” he shrugged, “No storm, no worries. It is simply a wave. Until the skies darken, and the storm shows up,” he moved his hand to simulate bursts of thunder and lightning, “And everybody is running and asking ‘Ahhh! How? How did this happen? Why did no one tell us this was coming?’”

Y/n smiled slightly as the man clasped his hands together, speaking higher for the imitation.

“And the storm says,” he cleared his throat, “‘I did tell you. The waves grew wilder and wilder, but it was of no concern to you. You laughed and continued on, saying that it was nothing...that it would pass.’”

Y/n clenched the handkerchief tighter in her fist.

“Loneliness is not to be isolated further,” the man mused, smiling grandfatherly at Y/n, “Rather, to be smothered in the company of good friends, a lover. Family.”

Whether he was an angel or a hallucination, the man was telling Y/n everything the part of her mind she didn’t listen to did. She’d hidden away all her life, terrified to let anyone in. The effort had finally beaten her. She was tired of the loneliness, tired of lying, tired of fending off the efforts of those who were already in her heart.

Y/n gave a watery smile, “You might be right.”

He smiled back, “Maybe.”

With a wink, he started back up the path he’d come.

“Wait,” Y/n held up the handkerchief, “You forgot this.”

The man looked back and waved a little, “Keep it. A little reminder not to be alone for too long.”

He went off then, Y/n watched him until he disappeared around a corner, feeling dumbstruck. Terrified. Relieved. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do, but her feet set off with such purpose, it didn’t matter if she knew. She was on the right track.

She ended up in the red light district, of all places. There was no one to call, each of the Greyhounds off on their own adventures, but Y/n was determined to be somewhere there was life. To do something. Not stand on the sidelines and pretend she had no desire to be in the middle of it all. A jazz club seemed like the perfect answer.

The establishment she decided on was busy, but not too crowded. She took cautious steps through, hoping she didn’t pick too rowdy of a place. Soft jazz played from the stage at the back of the smoky room. She was about to settle at the bar when she spotted the backs of two heads she knew quite well.

Walking up to the two men, Y/n tapped Higgins on the shoulder.

“Y/n,” he exclaimed, no doubt a little tipsy, “What are you doing here?”

“Just wandered in,” she replied, looking past him and giving a little wave to Will, “You mind if I join you guys?”

“Oh, please,” Will gestured to the table, jumping up from his seat to help Y/n into a chair.

“The more the merrier,” Higgins added before going back to playing the upright air-bass.

Y/n tried not to laugh, she’d never seen him off-the-clock. She suspected Will hadn’t either as the two of them caught each other’s eye, sharing a look of mutual amusement.

“Has he been like this all night?” Y/n asked.

“Uh, little bit, yeah,” Will answered, Higgins scatting in the background.

One of the women that had been playing on stage made her way down to the Richmond table, scrunching down to Higgins’ level. She raised her voice over the music, “Do you play?”

Higgins startled, stumbling over his words due to surprise and liquor. “Uh…um…”

Y/n smiled and turned to the woman, “He does.”

“Yes, he— Yes, he does,” Will was quick to follow, “He plays bass because Chet Baker- Chet Ba- Do you know who Chet Baker is?”

The woman smiled sweetly at Will.

“All right, okay,” he replied, settling back in his chair and looking to Y/n, reminding her of an excitable puppy.

“What do you say, Higgins?” Y/n asked, looking over at her co-worker.

He looked to be wrestling with an already made decision. Will patted him on the shoulder, urging him to accept the unspoken offer. Buoyed by his co-workers, Higgins scooted his chair back and followed the woman up to the stage. Will and Y/n cheered him on.

“We went to see where Chet Baker killed himself,” Will said, his grin didn’t quite match his words.

Y/n raised her brows, still smiling. “Well, that must’ve been fun.”

“It was,” Will replied, “What have you been doing?”

Higgins took hold of the bass, getting a feel for it before playing a complex intro to a song.

Y/n’s eyes never left the stage, “Nothing as fun as this.”

“Let’s get lost now!” Higgins called to the crowd.

Everyone let out a shout of approval, Will and Y/n’s the loudest, and the rest of the band kicked in. Y/n pulled out her phone and opened her camera app, she hit record just as the woman who’d pulled Higgins up began to sing.

As the song played, for the first time in four months, Y/n smiled so broadly, her cheeks hurt. When Higgins went into a solo, she grabbed Will’s arm and the two of them watched ecstatically. She felt like she’d come to an oasis in the middle of a desert, not even realizing how in need of water she was.

When the song ended, she was the first one to her feet.

—————————

The next morning, the Greyhounds were surprisingly sober aboard the Coach. They went about their separate conversations, waiting for the last of them to find their way onto the bus.

An unfamiliar pair of shoes slapped up the steps, drawing a couple of eyes upward.

Y/n stopped at the front of the bus, holding up a beanie.

“This,” she said loud enough to get all the player’s attention, “Is a collection plate. It will be sitting at the back of the bus, where at some point during the eleven hour drive back to our lovely nation, you will each place an unspecified amount of money which, in total, will amount to what we owe the hotel in damages to pillows,” Y/n held up a finger, smiling annoyedly, “And keep in mind, I do know your salaries. Give accordingly.”

There was a mixture of shame and amusement on the Greyhound’s faces, but no real regret. Nor was Y/n actually mad. She had questions, but she couldn’t stop herself from laughing when she came down to the lobby and saw Higgins doing damage control at the concierge desk over the feathery mess.

She made her way to the back of the bus where Ted and a very dressed-up Beard sat.

“Hey, stranger,” Ted greeted, looking up from his notebook, “How’d Amsterdam treat ya?”

“Alright,” she replied, looking at the empty spot next to Ted, “Do you…mind if I join you guys?”

Ted smiled, surprised but delighted. He knew if he said too much he might scare Y/n right back off the bus, “You kiddin’? Scoot your boot, c’mon.”

Sliding in beside him, Y/n exhaled against the plush seat. Will had already packed her bags in the luggage compartment and she’d texted Rebecca to let her know she wouldn’t be joining her on the jet back to London.

She finally got a full look at Beard’s ensemble. A big snout and pig ears, a glittery jumpsuit with silver platform boots, and an unmistakable blue and red lightning bolt painted across his face.

“I hate that I know what you’re going for,” Y/n remarked across the table.

“Don’t hate it,” Beard replied, spreading his hands, “Embrace it.”

Y/n chuckled before the cheering from the Greyhounds caught her ear. She glanced down the aisle to spot Rebecca making her way towards them.

“Hey,” she greeted.

“Hey, boss,” Ted added as Rebecca slid in next to Y/n, looking more relaxed than ever. “So, twelve unanswered texts, three un-haha’ed GIFs. We good?”

“I’m sorry, Ted,” Rebecca smiled, speaking slowly, “My phone is at the bottom of a canal.”

Ted pondered the answer, “Is that Keats?”

Rebecca shook her head, “Nope.”

“Well, I guess I didn’t need to send that text,” Y/n commented, “I won’t be on the plane home, by the way.”

Rebecca gave a breathy laugh, reaching over to pat Y/n’s hand. Out of character as all get out, but Y/n was happy to see her boss so…at peace.

“Hey, Will,” Ted called down to the kitman, “How we looking?”

“Uh, we’re two short,” Will answered, “Who’s missing?”

Y/n had clocked the missing presences the second she’d stepped on the bus. Being the closest to the window, she was the first to spot them, but she didn’t quite believe what she saw.

Jamie rode up beside the bus on a bike, Roy sitting behind him and hanging on with one arm slung round Jamie’s hips.

“You lovely people,” Jamie called out as Roy eagerly hopped off.

“Oh, this is gonna be good,” Y/n remarked.

“Don’t fucking ask,” Roy groaned as he came down the aisle, “Let’s go.”

Just as he’d taken his seat, Jamie jumped aboard, holding his fists in the air. “We saw a windmill!”

The Greyhounds cheered, high-fiving Jamie as he found a seat. He caught Y/n sandwiched between Rebecca and Ted, the two of them sharing a grin.

“You take my advice?”

Y/n shook her head, “Not a bit.”

Jamie clutched his chest, letting himself fall into one of the chairs. “I’m hurt,” he called over the chatter.

Rebecca slid her feet up onto the table, shutting her eyes as if she meant to go to drift off. This was the most relaxed Y/n had ever seen her, and she suspected the same went for Ted.

“Everything okay, boss?” Ted asked.

Waiting a moment, Rebecca responded with a tune that had had a much different meaning the day before.

“Don’t worry,” she sang, “‘Bout a thing. ‘Cause every little thing’s, gonna be all right.”

“Well,” Ted smiled, “I appreciate it.”

“Singin’ don’t worry,” Beard continued, singing back quite nasally, “About a thing.”

Y/n laughed, what else was there to do? She was watching a man in a David Bowie/swine get-up sing Bob Marley, and there was literally no place she’d rather be.

“‘Cause every little thing,” Rebecca sang along with Beard, “Gonna be all right.”

Ted chuckled alongside Y/n, “Ready for eleven hours of this?”

“Definitely,” Y/n nodded.

“Everybody!” Beard called to the bus before continuing the song, “Don’t worry…”

As she sang with the team, Y/n felt the four month old tension she’d been holding melt away. This was where she belonged, this was where she wanted to stay.

—————

Heartfirst Taglist: @lalla-04p @optimisticsandwichgladiator @makingmunson94 @taytaylala12 @storysimp @sokkigarden @lightninginab0ttle @poohkie90 @alipap3 @verra-nerevarine @shineforever19 @spaceagechimera @burnafter-reading @qardasngan @cyberpvnk-enthusiast @sogoodtoheritsvicious @buckybarnex @angelsunflxwer @blueanfield @thewildestwonderland @sablecities @oxxolovemelikeyoudooxxo @strawberryacethingz @mentalistfan @tortilla-maria1 @katdahlali @for-fuck-sake-im-alive @glitterquadricorn @jamieolivia27 @imvibin69 @katlizada @lil-tracys @fanaticalfantasist @heyitz-julia @cactajuice @peachyy-tea @notalxx @rockchickrebel @anxiety-prime-max @mentalistfan @loveforaugust @jellycolors @actuallybarb @heletsmelovehim @lovinnscarletknight @imfalling-inlove

[illiterateaffairs]

DISTRACTIONS X | LET ME BACK IN

pairing: jamie tartt x f!reader (ted lasso)

rating: T

word count: 8,787

summary: jamie’s upset that you’re keeping secrets from him and keeping him a secret. you need to find a way to fix everything.

A/N: Thank you all for your reactions on the last chapter. Even if you’re mad at the reader, I love that you guys care so much about her and Jamie. I hope despite the angst this chapter makes it a bit better...here we goooooo! xo

distractions masterlist | previous chapter  

Something was wrong with Jamie. And you had a feeling it was your fault. 

After you returned from your interview with the publishing house in New York, Jamie started acting differently. He was quiet and distant. When you tried to ask him about it, he brushed you off. At first you thought something had happened, and that he’d eventually tell you what was wrong in his own time. But that was a week ago and he still hadn’t given you any explanation as to what was making him act like this.

You think maybe he’s caught on to your own secrets, such as the job opportunity you still weren’t telling him about. The interview had gone well, so much so, that you were about to have your second. You had talked yourself up to telling him about it before then, but since he was already not talking to you, you didn’t want to make matters worse. Or you were using Jamie’s feelings as a perfect excuse to delay the inevitable. Either way, you weren’t any closer to explaining your behavior than he was explaining his. 

It was eating you up inside. You wanted to ask what was wrong, but you couldn’t bear the answer. You figured he was mad at you for all the secrets surrounding your relationship, and in a perfect world you’d give in and tell him everything. But you seized up every time you thought about doing so. It only made you feel even worse that he was pushing you away, and you were helpless to do anything about it. His behavior hurt you, but you couldn’t help but feel like you deserved it, so you took it. 

It was clear communication was something you both needed to work on.

You also didn’t want to pry too much because you figured AFC Richmond’s upcoming match against Man City was also getting to him. 

In the bits and pieces he’s told you about his dad, you knew he hadn’t seen him since they had it out when they played at Wembley. They were also going to Jamie’s hometown, and the die-hard Man City fans weren’t particularly thrilled when Jamie left the team for his brief reality tv stint. You can’t imagine how all of this is weighing on his chest. You imagine it's pretty hard, and again you just wish he’d come talk to you about it.

Today you decided to try giving Jamie complete space by not reaching out, with the hopes that maybe he would do so himself. In an effort to not sit around and wait by your phone, you go out to lunch with Keeley and Rebecca to enjoy your day off. 

Turns out it's exactly what you needed. Not only were you dying for a good meal - that Rebecca was paying for - you were in desperate need of girl talk. You were thrilled to catch up with both of them, and were even more excited to hear that Rebecca was investing in Keeley’s PR company so it didn’t have to completely shut down. You were also very intrigued when Rebecca made reference to Roy spending the night with Keeley a few nights ago, and upon questioning from both of you, Keeley played coy as to whether that meant her and the brooding football coach were getting back together. 

Unfortunately, that’s when the topic changed to your own romantic endeavors. Both of your friends inquired about how you and Jamie were doing. At first, you plastered on a polite smile, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to convince them everything was okay if you couldn’t even convince yourself. As soon as your faux-smile flips into a wobbling frown, both women sit up and are at the ready to comfort you. 

“We’re actually not great right now,” you choke out, feeling yourself becoming emotional about everything for the first time. Determined not to cry, you bite your tongue, “Jamie’s been distant lately and I’m pretty sure it's my fault.”

“Oh, babe,” Keeley sighs, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear, “What makes you say that?”

You take a deep breath, “First, that I’ve still been hesitant to tell everyone about us.”

Rebecca frowns from her seat on the other side of you, grasping your hand, “I’m sure he understands why you want to wait.”

“But I don’t even fully understand why,” you sigh, squeezing her hand, “And it's not just that. I’ve been lying to him about something else, too.”

Rebecca and Keeley remain quiet, giving you the space to admit it yourself. After collecting yourself, you begin to explain how you were interviewing for a literary job in New York, thanks to a friend back home. You told them it was going well, and that you had another interview set up in a couple days, and while you were excited to have a job in your dream career field, there was also something holding you back. And you didn’t want Jamie to worry about you moving away, especially if you didn’t know whether or not that was going to happen yet. But you fear he’s caught on to the sneaking around and is upset with you. 

You take a deep breath, after you word vomit every worry you were feeling. You were staring at the table throughout your whole explanation, and when you finally look up at them, they’re exchanging looks with each other.

“What?” you whisper, “Do you think I’m a horrible person?”

They rush to assure you they do not in fact think you’re horrible at all. They completely understand why you’ve been keeping this to yourself, but admit that it probably isn’t making Jamie feel good that you’re keeping something from him, even though he doesn’t know what it is. 

“I know its scary,” Keeley says softly, now holding on to your other hand, “But I don’t think Jamie will react as badly as you think. Yeah, he’d probably hate the idea of you leaving, but he’s also so supportive of you. You know that.”

You nod, “I do know that. I think it's just the last time I told someone I was with that I wanted to go after a new job, he made me feel like shit.”

Keeley scoffs, “Well that guy was an asshole and he’s not Jamie.”

“I know.” You repeat, firmly this time. Hesitantly, you turn your focus to Rebecca, “What about you? Are you upset that I've been considering another job?”

“Please, I’ve been waiting for this day to come since you started,” Rebecca chuckles, “You and I both knew this was just temporary, until you were in a better place to go after what you really wanted. I’m proud that you’re making those steps now.”

You close your eyes, absorbing her kind words. While it was reassuring to hear, it didn’t make any of this easier. 

“Even if it was supposed to be temporary, that didn’t stop me from finding the best people I’ve ever met,” you squeeze both of their hands, “I don’t want to leave any of you just as much as I don’t want to leave Jamie, even if it's what I’ve always wanted.”

Rebecca and Keeley exchange another look, this time with small smiles forming on their faces.

“What if we told you, you could do both?” Keeley asks mysteriously.

You narrow your eyes, “What? Did you suddenly invent teleportation or something?”

“No, better,” she smiles proudly, “I recently took on a new client who’s an up-and-coming author from Wales, who is signed under this major agency here is London. So, because I’m the best person ever, I reached out to his agent and told her all about you and the book you’re working on, and she’s interested in meeting with you.”

“A literary agent, in the U.K., is interested in meeting with me?” you ask, dumbfounded.

Keeley nods aggressively and Rebecca gives you a huge grin.

“So, if they like my work, they could potentially sign me, and I could stay in Richmond?”

“Yup,” Keeley confirms, “And then when you eventually finish your incredible book, I can be your publicist!”

You laugh in disbelief, “I don’t know what to say.”

“Say you’ll think about it,” Rebecca says, “We know New York was where you wanted to be and maybe that’s still your dream, and we’d 100% support you. But if staying in Richmond is where you want to be now, you can do that too and still pursue writing.”

“Yeah, we love you, and we just want you to be happy,” Keeley assures, “Although, selfishly, I’d want you to stay here but that's just me.”

“No, I second that.” Rebecca quips.

“But totally no pressure,” Keeley tacks on, and after a beat, the three of you burst into a fit of giggles. 

“Thank you, both,” you smile genuinely, “For everything but mostly being so supportive. I appreciate you looking out for me, and I will definitely consider meeting with that agent.”

“Good,” Rebecca cheers, pulling her hand from yours to clap hers together, “Everything will work out, career wise and with Jamie, too. I know it.”

Keeley squeezes your hand again, before returning to finishing her brunch, and your conversation swings back to what Rebecca has had going on. While you still needed to fix things with Jamie, as well as figure out what the hell you wanted to do with your writing, you had a feeling no matter what happened, everything would be okay. 

Contrary to feeling more confident in your situation, it had only gotten worse. Over the last few days, Jamie had gone from distancing himself from you to completely ghosting you. Your attempts at reaching out weren’t completely ignored, but his responses were minimal and you could tell were excuses. At work he’d avoid you, and when you invited him over, he’d say he was either tired from training or doing extra training. Again, you couldn’t pretend it didn’t sting, but you tried to push it all away, hoping after the Manchester game, he’d start feeling differently. 

Meanwhile, you were also grappling with not one, but two job opportunities. The one Kara presented was in your dream city, but the one Keeley offered would keep you here with your new found-family. Both were appealing, but both scared the shit of you. Moving to yet another city was a big deal, but staying in one just for someone else was a mistake you’ve made before. Not that Jamie was at all like Mason. You knew that above all else. But it was still something to consider. Plus, it was anxiety inducing having two of your friends get you these chances that felt a little unearned, especially with how you’ve been handling everything. It was a lot to process, and the one person who usually helps you relax was avoiding you. By no fault but your own. 

Jesus, you were getting no work done today, with all of these other problems taking up space in your brain. Plus you were hiding from Ted’s mom in an effort to keep your secret, because she in fact did not know about everything. 

“Oi!” you jump at the sound of your office door being busted open, a booming voice accompanying it, “You need to fix your boyfriend.”

With your hand over your chest, trying to settle your racing heart, you give Roy Kent an apprehensive look, your eyes flitting to the hallway behind him.

Roy rolls his eyes, “Most of the team has cleared out for the night. No one’s going to hear us.”

Still, he invites himself into the room and pushes the door shut rather aggressively, before plopping himself down in the seat across from yours with his arms crossed.

You calm down a bit, but you still feel nervous with the glare he was giving you. Did his eyebrows get thicker?

“What do you mean?” you ask eventually, wondering if you come off like you don’t know exactly what he’s talking about.

“Tartt,” Roy spits out, “He just spent the last fifteen minutes crying into my arms.”

Your face falls, “He did?”

“Yeah. Said he’s lost his wings.”

“Jesus,” you mutter with a frown. “Did he tell you why he feels like that?”

Roy shakes his head, “He says he doesn’t even know.” You bite your lip, breaking eye contact with him. He tilts his head, “Something tells me you might have an idea.”

You sigh, crossing your own arms before looking at him again, “He’s been acting off the last week or so.” Roy nods. “I think it has something to do with the Man City match coming up.”

Roy grunts, “That doesn’t surprise me.”

You hesitate before adding on, “And I probably have something to do with it, too.”

Roy furrows his brows again, “What did you do?”

You grit your teeth, “I think it's more about what I’m not doing. I’ve had some personal stuff I’ve been sorting through recently that I’ve been keeping to myself. And I can tell he’s been wanting to tell everyone about us even though he says it's fine that we’re not.”

“So?” Roy shrugs, “Just fucking tell everyone.”

“It's not that simple.”

“Why not?” he questions, “Are you embarrassed of him or something?”

“No! Of course not. I do want people to know.”

“Then why not tell people?”

“Because every time I think about telling anyone - the team, my family - I get this horrible feeling in my chest and I feel like I can’t breathe. I don’t know why, but it freaks me out.”

Roy’s silent for a second before letting out a “Huh.” Another moment goes by, “You should talk to Ted about that.”

Inwardly you laugh. Oh, how that was only another part of the problem. A problem you still didn’t understand the root of.

“Either way,” Roy continues, “I think you should at least tell Jamie this. He needs you.”

“Don’t you think I’ve tried?” you say, “He’s barely talked to me the last few days, and when he does it's nothing of substance. I want to help him but I don’t know how to get him to let me.”

Once again Roy doesn’t say anything right away. You instead decide to break the silence this time.

“Maybe Keeley would be able to get through to him,” you suggest softly, “She already kind of knows something’s up and she’s known him longer. Maybe he’ll listen to her.”

Roy looks as apprehensive about the idea as you sound, but you both know it's not a bad one. Eventually he nods and stands up.

“I’ll ask her,” he states. You take that as the end of your conversation before Roy turns back in your direction in the doorway, “You’re going to have to talk to him eventually. Jamie may be stubborn and weird and a fucking idiot sometimes, but you’re important to him. He’ll come around.”

You give him a slight smile, though it's a bit forced, and thank him. He nods once, his lip quirking up a bit in what must be his version of a smile, before he disappears down the hall. 

Maybe if you couldn’t fix Jamie someone else could.

Apparently no one knew how to fix Jamie. 

While you hadn’t heard from him into the next day, Roy and Keeley had informed you she’d try to talk to him when everyone arrived in Man City. You waited in the suite you were sharing with her and Rebecca, anxiously hoping she’d come back and announce he was magically doing better. But, when she quietly entered the hotel room, the look on her face told you everything.

“He’s still upset?” You question already knowing the answer.

Keeley regretfully nods, “And I think I made it worse.”

“How could you have possibly made it worse?” you exclaim. 

“I didn’t mean to!” Keeley cries, her hands shaking, “But there’s team movie night, tonight, right? Maybe some time with the team and a good, old-fashioned rom-com will cheer him up.”

“I don’t know, Keeley,” you sigh. You hesitate for a few seconds, before asking, “Did he say anything about me?”

Keeley looks at the carpeted floor, “Not really. I brought you up - said you were worried about him - and he just looked sad and didn’t say anything.”

“Fuck,” you breath out, collapsing backwards on your bed, “Did I break him?”

“No,” Keeley urges, jumping on to the bed beside you, “Trust me it can’t be just your shit. The boy is unhinged right now.”

You snort despite the situation. 

“Come on,” Keeley nudges you, “Let's get a drink, relax a little, go to the movie night and see if we can’t talk to him after, yeah?”

You sigh again, before reluctantly nodding and letting her pull you up and out of the room. 

Jamie needed to clear his head. Contrary to what he had hoped, a team viewing of You’ve Got Mail was not enough to lift his spirits. In fact, he could hardly get through five minutes of the movie without thinking of you. And thinking of you came with a reminder of how you’d been hiding things from him, and then how he’d cowardly been avoiding you instead of facing the problem head on. Of course those anxieties also doubled when he remembered the game he was playing this weekend. 

He felt guilty for shutting you out. Of course he did. He honestly hadn’t meant for it to get this far, he was just trying to figure out how to bring it all up. But then he started spiraling about returning to his home town and seeing his dad that it all became too much. He wanted nothing more than to talk to you about his worries, but you were apart of the reason he was so anxious. He could sense your own guilt - especially during the movie when he could feel your eyes staring at the back of his head. But he was still afraid of where the conversation would lead, so he once again pushed those feelings away. 

Jamie knew there was one place he could go that would instantly make him feel better. And that was his mother’s house.

As soon as the credits rolled, Ted was calling for a 10PM curfew, but Jamie was on his way out. He expertly navigated the streets of Manchester, hoodie pulled over his head to avoid unwanted attention. About halfway through his commute, he caught onto the fact that you, Roy, and Keeley were trailing him. Despite his avoidance of all three of them, he couldn’t help but feel amused that they were trying to sneakily follow him. 

After leading them through a tunnel, in which the trio lost track of him, he doubled back and snuck up on them. Once again, he was satisfied that he’d managed to startle the three, but then he noticed the worry on your face, and he was reminded of the situation you were all in. He briefly considered ordering them away, until Keeley asked if he was buying drugs, so he figured ridding them of any weird suspicions they may have about him would get them off of his back. 

As he led them unknowingly to his mum’s house, he felt a pain in his stomach knowing you were purposely leaving space between the two of you as you followed behind. He wanted nothing more than to take your hand, but just because you felt bad about hiding things from him, didn’t absolve you of everything. 

When they arrived on his street, a few of the neighborhood kids started yelling obscenities at him. Jamie just shook his head, knowing as well that Roy was definitely amused, before walking them over to his house. 

Simon, his step-dad, greets them warmly and Jamie introduces them to his three confused companions. Then before he knows it, his mum is bounding down the stairs and all of his anxiety begins to melt away as she engulfs him into her arms. 

Pulling away briefly, he turns back to see the curious looks on your faces, “Mummy, I’d like to introduce you to my friends, Y/N, Keeley and this hairy prick’s Roy.”

You smile sweetly in recognition as you all greet Jamie’s mom, but Jamie can tell you’re still caught off guard. 

“It’s lovely to meet you all. I’d give you a hug but I’m not letting go of this one,” Jamie’s mom, Georgie, says cheerfully before Jamie picks her up and spins her around.

The lot of you end up in the living room after that, Jamie collapsing in his mother’s arms on the couch as Simon serves the rest of you with some of his homemade sweet treats. After Jamie tells her about the jerks online making fun of his hair, Georgie suggests that Simon give the rest of you a tour of the house. As they all file out, Jamie looks up at you. You give him a tiny smile; one that somehow conveyed guilt, sorrow, and support. Jamie was both happy you were here and scared as hell about where this night was going to go.

Now left alone with his mum, she finally presses Jamie to confess to what has been bothering him. He begins to explain how ever since he stopped playing football to spite his dad, he’s begun to feel like he’s lost his passion; that his heart wasn’t in it. 

Georgie frowns and holds her son closer. She lets him know that whether or not Jamie was the way he was in spite of his father, he was an amazing human. She also admits to how emotional she was when she saw him play for England. She assured him that even if his dad was in the stands tomorrow, drunk and screaming at him, it didn’t matter. He had nothing to prove to him. Even if he was feeling lost, she was positive he’d find his way eventually. 

Jamie instantly felt comforted by his mum’s words, hugging her tighter. He knew that no matter what happened with his dad, he’d always have her and she’d always be his biggest fan. 

After her speech, they sit in silence for a few moments, with his mum brushing her fingers through his hair.

“Jamie, is something else bothering you other than your dad?” she asks softly. 

Jamie plays with the strings of his sweatshirt, not even sure where to begin when it comes to you. He hadn’t told his mum about you officially, but he certainly hadn’t shied away from mentioning you over phone calls the duration that you’d been here. 

“There’s also a girl,” he says slowly, “That I’ve been seeing the last couple months.”

He can feel his mum smirk into his hairline, “One of the girls that came here with you tonight?” Jamie already knows his mum knows about Keeley, but he still clarifies that it's you. “And you like her?”

Jamie sighs. Like doesn’t even begin to cover it. “I’m mad for her.”

“So what’s the problem?”

“I think she’s hiding some things from me,” he admits quietly, “And she’s also been keen on keeping our relationship a secret from most of our friends and I dunno why. I’m afraid she’s ashamed of me.”

“But she treats you well? Makes you happy?”

“Yeah.”

“Then she’s probably just scared, babe,” she tries to soothe his worries, “I doubt she’s keeping things a secret for any reason to hurt you.”

“But why would she be scared?” he questions, “I’m not going anywhere. I’m not going to hurt her. I’ve done and said everything to make sure she knows that. Well, up until I started avoiding her the last few days.”

Georgie shakes her head at that last bit, but ignores it, “It doesn’t matter what you say. If voices in her head are telling her otherwise, they’re still going to be louder than any other voice even if it's unreasonable. This is the girl you told me about right? The one with the asshole boyfriend from America?”

“Ex-boyfriend,” Jamie mutters making his mother chuckle.

“She’s probably still reeling from the way he treated her. Even if you prove that you’re not anything like him, it's still gonna take some time for her to fully trust you. Or anyone. You need to be patient with her, love.”

Jamie sighs. He knows she’s right. He has his own voices in his head working against him half the time, he should be more understanding of whatever is going on in your own head. He gets that you’ve been fucked over before, and you’re definitely putting up walls because of it. He just wishes there was something he could do or say that would erase all of the emotional scars you had. But again, maybe that was something you could work on together. He just needed to actually step up and talk to you. 

Even though you and Jamie have been in a rocky place, you are enjoying the tour of his childhood home. There are so many little things throughout the house that give you a glimpse into Jamie’s life, you try to memorize it all. You’re loving everything you learn, that is, until you make it to Jamie’s room and see the poster of Keeley with two footballs covering her breasts. You feel a little weird seeing a picture of your friend and boyfriend's ex in his childhood bedroom, but part of you is equally amused, especially with Keeley’s reaction. And then there’s an old photo of Roy pinned right beside it that completes it all. 

Simon leaves the three of you alone to check on his baked goods in the oven. You eventually excuse yourself to the bathroom in order to gather your thoughts, but also to give Roy and Keeley the chance to talk. You’ve been sensing the tension between them all night, despite their insistence on just being friends.

As soon as you shut yourself in the hall bathroom, you stare at your face in the mirror. You look downright exhausted. And you were. All of the worrying you were doing about Jamie, on top of the shit you were keeping from him, was weighing heavily on you. Seeing him turn into a little kid in the presence of his mom both melted and broke your heart. He was clearly hurting for a million reasons, and it killed you to even be one. It also hurt you when he introduced you to his mom as a friend, but it was your own doing. 

Splashing water on your face, you begin to question everything. Why did you really want to keep your relationship with Jamie a secret? You have half a mind to send an email blast to the entire club right now saying you’re together, but even the half-baked idea makes your stomach hurt. But why? Why couldn’t you just be a normal person and tell the world you had a boyfriend. It wasn’t a big deal.

Except it was. Because it was Jamie. And with all his quirks and occasionally prick-like qualities, you adored him. More than you’ve ever adored anyone. It was the biggest deal in the world and you didn’t want to risk messing it up. 

But you already have. 

That’s it, you decide, staring your reflection down as you dry your face with a hand towel. You were going to tell Jamie everything. About Ted. About your job conundrum. And then once the air was cleared and Jamie - hopefully - still wanted to be with you, you’d hopefully feel better and be able to tell the world. You don't give yourself the chance to change your mind. As soon as you were back in Richmond you would talk. But hopefully you get the chance to at least apologize to him tonight. If he lets you. 

You don’t have to wonder about that long. As you exit the bathroom, you nearly run full force into Jamie, but he gently grabs your arms to steady you.

Your heart doesn’t settle though, as you find yourself alone with Jamie for the first time in what feels like ages. 

“Hi,” you breathe out shakily, studying his eyes for any sign of what he might say to you.

“Hi,” he repeats just as quietly, slowly and reluctantly, removing his arms from around you.

After a few seconds of silence, both of you open your mouths to apologize, but as soon as the words ‘i’m sorry’ leave his lips, you’re frowning.

“Jamie, you have nothing to be sorry for,” you insist, “You’re the one who’s been hurting these last couple weeks, and I have been the one to make it worse.”

Jamie shakes his head, “But I do have a reason. I fucked up. I should have just told you what was bothering me instead of pushing you away. You don’t deserve that.”

“I-”

“You don’t.” he states, leaving no room for argument.

You swallow thickly, “Why did you? Push me away, I mean?”

Jamie shrugs his shoulders, “I think I was afraid if I confronted the issue, that’d you tell me you didn’t want to be with me or something. So I just shoved it all down. But that clearly didn’t help.”

You sigh, “I get that. I still want to be with you, though, just so you know.”

The corner of Jamie’s lips lift, but it's still wobbly, “What has been going on with you then? I know you’re keeping something from me, and I know it has something to do with why you don’t want to tell anyone about us. I want to respect your decision, but it honestly has been killing me not telling anyone.” Jamie’s voice gets small, “Is it me? Are you embarrassed of me? Am I not good enough?”

“No, Jamie,” you step forward and gently place your hands on his face, relieved he doesn’t push you away, “You know that’s not it. I like you so much and I’m proud to be with you.”

“Then why don’t you want anyone to know?”

“You want the honest answer?” He nods. “I don’t know,” you whisper, “It scares me, Jamie. I don’t know why, but the idea of more people knowing makes me even more afraid of losing you somehow. I know that doesn’t make sense, but for whatever reason, keeping to our bubble makes me feel like I can protect us from anything bad happening.”

“Babe?” he quips quietly, “Something did happen. That’s why we’re having this conversation.”

You sigh, defeated, “I know. I told you I’m bad at this.” 

Jamie frowns and wraps you in his arms, “You’re not any worse than me. We just need to talk to each other.”

“Yeah,” you nod into his shoulder, “I promise I have more I want to tell you - and I will actually tell you - but it’d probably be better to do once we’re back home.”

Jamie’s heart swells. He knows you don’t mean anything by the word home, but he can’t help but feel comforted by the phrasing. “That sounds good,” he says softly, pulling back slightly so he can see your face, “Promise me, it's nothing bad. Like, you’re not seeing someone else, and you’re not wanted for murder, right?”

You laugh, despite the weight of the situation, “No, it's none of those things.” 

“Good,” Jamie smiles softly, “And I promise not to ignore you the next time I’m upset.”

“Thank you,” you give him your own watery smile, “Are you going to be okay, tomorrow? At the game, potentially seeing your dad?”

“I don’t know. I hope so,” he answers honestly, “Seeing mum always helps.”

Your smile widens, “Yeah. Your mom is wonderful. I’m really glad you have her.” You brush a few strands of hair out of his face, “I also promise next time we visit it will be under better circumstances, and you won’t have to introduce me as your friend.”

Jamie grins, “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” 

“I’m still okay with waiting as long as you need,” Jamie adds, “I’m scared, too. Also eager to brag about my insanely hot girlfriend everywhere I go. But I can wait. As long as you need.”

You giggle, “Thank you.”

“Alright, let’s get Keeley and Roy, and get out of here.” Jamie states, making a move in the direction of his bedroom. However, you tug him back.

“One more thing,” you whisper, before planting your lips on his for a long awaited kiss. When you eventually part, you both smile, “I missed that.”

“Me too,” Jamie nods before pressing his forehead against yours, “Never going that long without doing that ever again.”

You chuckle and agree, before you both part to collect Roy and Keeley. When you reenter Jamie’s room, you find the pair with their hands interlocked. They react as if they were in the middle of something - which they clearly were - but Keeley stands up and drags you out of the room, leaving the boys behind. You make a mental note to ask her about that later. 

Outside o the house, the four of you say goodbye to Jamie’s mom and step-dad. His mom surprises you and gives you an extra tight hug. You have a feeling she probably already knows a thing or two about your relationship with Jamie. You find yourself unbothered by this though, and hope you find yourself feeling this way about telling your own family soon. 

You watch on and admire Jamie and his mother as they say goodbye. You’re once again so thankful he has a parent like her in his life, and that he’s clearly gotten the best parts of himself from her. He also definitely gained much of his confident arrogance from the way she talks about him, but he wouldn’t be Jamie without it so you can’t complain. 

After one last wave, and a promise to return, the four of you head down the road, making plans to get a drink upon arrival back to the hotel. 

The rest of the night you feel a sense of relief flood you. You and Jamie were okay. More than okay, in fact, you come to realize, when he’s propositioning you to come back to his room with him. A room he wasn’t sharing with a teammate, he’s sure to emphasize. You of course eagerly accept, and spend the night wrapped in Jamie’s arms before falling into a blissful sleep. 

You find yourself thinking about your late night hook-up when you lie awake early the next morning. Things were different between you. They were more intimate, even by your standards. It was like you used your bodies to convey every ounce of how sorry you were, and how much you cared about one another. It was slow. Tender. Loving. 

Before you can linger too much on that thought, Jamie’s eyes are fluttering open as he lays on the pillow next to you. As soon as he blinks the sleepiness out of his eyes, he gives you a warm smile, which you return.

“Good morning,” he whispers, running his fingers through your messy hair.

“Good morning to you, too.”

“I wish I could stay here with you all day, but…”

“You’ve got to get ready for the game.” you finish for him.

He nods regretfully before pushing himself out of bed. Before he can get too far, you reach for his arm.

“Will you be okay out there today?” you ask, once again.

And again, Jamie seems unsure, but he plasters another small smile on his face before leaning down to give you a kiss, “As long as you’re there watching, I’ll be fine.”

You can’t help but smile back, pecking him one last time before shooing him off to get ready.

With another moment alone, you once again feel relieved that you and Jamie are back in a better place. However, you feel that familiar ache in your chest that something is missing; that you still have things to make up for. You know you still have a lot to explain to him, but that could wait until tomorrow. You needed to see Jamie win this game first. 

Richmond’s match against Man City on this day will go down as one of the most stressful football games you’ve ever witnessed. 

Everything started out smoothly. You watched enthusiastically from a box, seated in between Keeley and Rebecca, with Higgins on her other side. Van Damme was blocking every attempt made by the opposing team, and Jamie assisted Colin in making the first goal of the match. As you and your friends cheered, Leslie was hesitant to celebrate in fear of jinxing the team, so he stayed frozen in place.

Unfortunately, things took a turn after that. It was like the whole stadium was against Jamie. From the moment he walked onto the pitch, angry Man City fans were booing and cursing his name. Not only that, it seemed like every player on Manchester’s side was out to get the footballer, knocking him down or stealing the ball every chance they got. 

You watched on nervously, trying not to let it get to you. It was the name of the game. But it didn’t mean you had to like it. 

Half way through the game, the worst of your fears happened. In an effort to prevent Man City from scoring, Jamie leapt to block the ball and hurt his ankle in the process. You watched with bated breath when he wouldn’t get up from his spot hunched behind the goal line. He brushed off Isaac’s attempts to help him, and eventually got up himself. You let out a sigh of relief, until after walking a few feet, Jamie is falling back onto the pitch and the medical team is rushing onto the field.

“Holy shit,” you mutter under your breath.

Keeley takes your hand in hers and gives it a squeeze. “Hey, it's okay. Jamie’s going to be okay.” But you can tell she sounds just as nervous as you feel. 

You don’t know how long you’re waiting to see if Jamie will make it back up, but its torture. Ted is clearly banking on Jamie being able to play again, refusing to substitute anyone for him and having the team play with ten players instead of eleven. For their part, they’re holding down the fort, and Van Damme continues to block every shot. But you don’t care about the game, you just care about Jamie. 

At this point, both Rebecca and Keeley have a hold on each of your hands as you watch the medics look after Jamie. You know the coaches must be getting restless, because Ted goes to talk to Jamie again. You wish nothing more than to be able to rush down onto the pitch and comfort him yourself, but you trust that Ted is giving him the pep talk he needs to hear. 

And it seems as though you were right, because minutes after talking to Ted, Jamie is up and walking back onto the field, to the excitement of the crowd and his teammates. 

You feel a weight lifted off of your shoulders, letting go of your friends’ hands to clap for him yourself. 

“Yeah, let's go Jamie!” 

It was as if the next few moments happen in slow motion. After defending another goal against Man City, Van Damme is sending the ball down the field to an open Jamie, who expertly navigates around several opponents to get towards Richmond’s goal. You watch in awe as Jamie scores the team’s second point, bad ankle and all, all on his own. 

You practically fly out of your seat to cheer for him, screaming and jumping around with Keeley and Rebecca. In the midst of the stadium’s celebration, a whistle blows to finally send in Jamie’s substitution. Looking a bit shell-shocked and relieved, Jamie slowly makes his way off the field, but it's not without a proud send off from the entire crowd - including the Man City fans who were previously cheering against him.

Jamie’s touched face fills the jumbo-screen, and your heart swells with adoration. You know how much this has to mean to him. You also feel overcome with love for your uncle, who let Jamie have his moment before taking him out of the game. 

You had never felt more proud of Jamie, and you were once again overcome with the urge to run to him. 

You sit anxiously through the final moments of the game and rejoice in yet another celebration when the clock finally runs down and Richmond is declared the winner. Even as you embrace both of your friends in all the excitement, your thoughts are still consumed by Jamie.

You needed to see him. 

You can hear your heart pounding in your ears, as you walk with Keeley, Rebecca, and Higgins down to the guest locker room. You try not to appear over-eager, wanting to remain in step with your friends, but you find it hard to resist the temptation to run ahead of them. After what feels like a trillion years, you make it to the locker room, finding the team’s celebration in full force. You break away from your group, as they go to congratulate the coaches. Part of you also desperately wants to talk to Ted, about a lot of things, but particularly how much you appreciate him for being there for Jamie tonight, but you had to see Jamie first. Your eyes scan the room as you walk through, congratulating Colin and Dani as you pass each of them, before you finally notice Jamie, towards the middle of the room. Sam had his arm around him, most likely supporting his teammate with his injury and all. 

Not even really processing that your feet take you there, you find yourself in front of the footballers. Sam sees you first, giving you a blinding smile. You don’t hesitate to return it, but your attention is hard pressed on Jamie, and Sam seems to get the memo. 

“You’re here!” Jamie exclaims, breathless from the excitement, and a bit confused about what you’re doing.

You nod, “Yeah,” you shout over the noise, a bit breathless yourself. “You were…incredible out there.”

Jamie squints at you, though he’s thankful for the compliment, “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you bob your head up and down, still running on adrenaline. 

Jamie’s confusion is palpable, but when he goes to say something else, you don’t give him the fucking chance. 

Like a force, you wrap your arms around Jamie’s neck and pull him in for an earth-shattering kiss. You feel Jamie’s surprise, but it's short-lived as he wraps his own arms around your waist. You balance Jamie’s weight as Sam lets him go, only to start cheering for the two of you. This, of course, grabs the attention of the rest of the team, who immediately join in when they see what the two of you are doing. 

You hear shouts of surprise and excitement, and a few people shaking your shoulders, but you couldn’t care less. Your focus was entirely on Jamie, who was giving you the best kiss of your life right now. Unfortunately, breathing was still a thing so you had to pull away. When you do, you can’t look away from Jamie’s eyes, that are once again overcome with emotion. You imagine you look the same.

“Is this really happening?” Jamie eventually gets out, shakily.

All you can do is nod again, with a breathless laugh, “I think so.”

Jamie eagerly kisses you again before engulfing you in the tightest hug. Into his shoulder, you whisper how proud you are of him, and he only squeezes you closer to him, if at all possible.

Over his shoulder, you notice the rest of the club. Roy and Keeley look on at you two happily - or as happy as Roy Kent can look. Higgins for his part looks delighted as well, and Rebecca looks proud as hell. Beard looks like he’s frozen in place from the shock. And Ted…

You hadn’t really thought about how you were doing this in front of Ted.

When you study him, he is exchanging a look with Rebecca, who shrugs her shoulders innocently. Ted looks back at you, a little bit stunned, and a little bit amused. When he makes eye contact, you find yourself opening your mouth as if you could explain from where you were through all the commotion. He just raises his hand, signaling there was no need to say or do anything, and then he gives you a supportive smile.

You are once again flooded with relief. You knew you would eventually have to talk to him about everything, and explain more to Jamie as well. But at this moment, everything felt right in the world for the first time in a long time. 

The team’s victory celebration carries on throughout their bus trip back to Nelson Road and into the locker room as most of them get changed for a night out. Jamie elects to stay behind, wanting to rest his ankle, and also get a bit of alone time with you. 

You help Jamie walk to the treatment room, before telling him you were going to grab something from your car. He, of course, doesn’t let you leave without pulling you in for another kiss. He’d been kissing you any chance he got all night, basking in the freedom he now had to do so as he pleased. You had to admit, you could definitely get used to all the affection.

For your part, though, you didn’t need anything in your car. You just wanted the chance to task Roy and Keeley to find some champagne, so Jamie could still have his own little celebration. But you also wanted to talk to Ted. 

On your way to the coaches office, you pass Beard who is headed to the after party. When he clocks you, he gives you a wide eyed look. 

“You, missy, are my shit list,” he states, crossing his arms.

“What for?” you cross your own arms, “You want Jamie all to yourself or something?”

“No, Jamie’s not my type,” he teases, “I’m hurt that you didn’t tell me.”

You chuckle, “To be fair, I didn’t tell a lot of people.”

“Still, I thought we were closer than that.”

You give him a smile, uncrossing your arms to touch his shoulder. “I promise the next time I secretly date a footballer on the team you coach, you’ll be the first to know.”

“Thank you,” he places his own hand over yours, before pointing a finger at you, “But this better be the first and only time that happens.”

You giggle again. He kisses your head, letting you know that he is very happy for you, before disappearing into the night, as Beard does. 

That leaves you to find Ted alone in his office, packing up his bag. You knock on the doorframe, getting his attention, and immediately receiving a playful grin from him. 

“There she is,” he sing-songs, “Mrs. Jamie Tartt.”

You scoff, “Woah. Woah. Woah. We aren’t betrothed.”

Ted snorts, “I know. I just like teasing you, Kiddo.”

You laugh lightly, before you decide that it's now or never to address the elephant in the room. 

“I’m sorry for not telling you,” you say softly. 

Ted shakes his head, “There’s nothing to apologize for.”

You nod, but you don’t feel any less sorry. 

“Does Jamie know about our little family-affair?” Ted eventually asks.

You shake your head, “No. Was thinking I’d wait to tell him tomorrow, but…”

Ted nods, seemingly knowing exactly what you’re thinking, “You’re scared?”

“Yes,” you breathe out deeply, “But I don’t get it. I can’t tell him about you. I haven’t been able to tell you or Michelle or Dad and Pop about him. I really, really like him and I should be able to tell everyone that. But it terrifies me and I don’t understand why.

“I do,” Ted sticks his hands in his pockets and raises his shoulders, “Because as soon as you say something like that out loud, especially to the people who know and love you most, it makes it real. And that’s what's scary.”

You suck in a huge gulp of air, “Yes. That’s exactly how I’ve been feeling. I just didn’t know how to put it into words.”

Ted nods, continuing, “And telling family is twice as hard, because they’re the people who know you better than anyone else. They can call you on your bullshit, but they also know when something is the real deal. Which is probably why you never told us about what was really going on with Mason.”

You narrow your eyes at him, “How do you…”

“Rebecca may have mentioned a couple things in passing,” he admits, “She is not a fan of him to say the least. Rightfully so, it seems.”

“Yeah,” you agree shakily, “Even though Jamie is a lot different than Mason, I think I didn’t want to hear truths I wasn’t ready to accept yet.”

You did everything you could to keep your family and Mason out of the same room - and Mason made it easy - because you weren’t ready to have them all tell you how bad he was for you, even though you knew it deep down. But with Jamie, you just weren't ready to accept how important he was to you.

“It’s all understandable, Kiddo,” Ted states, “And I’m sorry that you went through that alone for a bit.”

You shrug it off, “I was okay. I wasn’t completely alone.”

Ted’s eyebrows raise, “Apparently so.” 

You feel your cheeks get hot, “That’s not exactly what I mean, but yeah, Jamie was certainly nice to have around the last few months.”

Your uncle chuckles, “Well, I’m happy that you found each other. I know you don’t need my approval or anyone else's, but I think you two are really great for each other.” 

Your stomach swirls, comforted by this notion. “Thank you. I think Jamie would be happy to hear that, too.”

“Well, I’ll be sure to let him know once you finally get your act together and introduce him to the family,” you roll your eyes, “Now, get outta here, Kiddo, and give that boy some company.”

You nod, taking a half step out the door before immediately spinning around to capture him in a big hug, “Love you, Uncle Ted.”

Ted sighs quietly, “Love you, too, Kiddo.”

Ted once again shoos you out of his office, and you bid him a goodnight, telling him to give Dottie a hug for you. 

When you rejoin Jamie in the treatment room, you find him typing away on his phone. He pockets it when he notices you come in, and gives you a sweet smile. 

As you join him on the infirmary bed he’s perched on, you press another chaste kiss to his lips. Jamie struggles to think of a time where’s been happier. He had you, and the rest of his people knew. He couldn’t ask for anything else. As you lean against his shoulder, and once again recount how proud you are of the game he played today, he can’t help but stare at you and take in just how special you are to him. He wants to find the words to express this to you, and a certain L word nearly leaves his lips, when he hears the door open to reveal Roy and Keeley. 

Jamie looks up at them curiously, brushing off how flustered he is from his previous thoughts, “What are you two doing here?”

“I invited them,” you speak up, drawing his attention back to you as you give him a smile.

“Yeah, wanted to keep you company,” Keeley adds with a bright smile of her own.

Roy reveals a bottle of champagne from behind his back, “And fucking celebrate.”

Keeley squeals and claps as you squeeze him into a hug. While Jamie would have loved a night just the two of you, he can’t complain when he’s surrounded by a group of people who care about him. He never thought he’d be so lucky. 

As Roy pops open the bottle and starts passing it around, you also can’t help but feel warmed by this moment. As the four of you share the champagne and joke around, you’re in disbelief that you’ve made it here; to be surrounded by genuine friends and a boy who was crazy about you. Not to mention becoming closer to your family again with Beard and Ted around. You still had a lot to sort out regarding your career, but one thought echoed through your brain the rest of that night:

Why would you ever want to leave this place?

A/N: THERE IT IS!! oof i poured my heart into this one and can’t wait to hear what you all think! the secret is out!!! mostly. ted has something to say next as well all know. anyway. TWO CHAPTERS LEFT!💗

Taglist: @atabigail @escapismqueen @boundtomyfate @sammysgirl1997 @lil-tracys @shephard17895 @alaspice @itsbarbraann @redpool @drmeghanjones @straightforwardly @alex-sulli @aiyaiy @artemismaximoff @roadtoself-love @theloud-yet-quietone @forcesofgrief @kirisimpster @geek-and-proud @grippleback-galaxy @lalla-04p @gabbycoady13 @royalestrellas @qardasngan @creationcitystreet-em @percysaidnever @emily-b @mrfitzsimmons @k-n-e @agentstarkid @legobatmans9thab @mrsprongs25 @sokkigarden @for-fuck-sake-im-alive @dollfaceyourfear @dicgohargreeves @heyitz-julia @vampirodelascajas @grxcesmind @lizziel1410 @a-sweet-little-fangirl @bcon24 @looooooooomis @queen-of-dumbasses @moseyluvs @alipap3 @amachira @respondingtoshowerthoughts-blog @daphneblakeswife @chelseamount @k0z3me @lickitandsendit3 @miakat9 @shimmeringfrenchie @meg-ro @selmasemlan @hellfire-babez @rockchickrebel​ @katdahlali​ @taytaylala12​ @lemonpiegurll​ @pri00r​ @brianandthemays​ @afraidofshrimp​ @curlypeter​ @sonyume​ @rexorangecouny​ @thewildestwonderland​ @cyphah @buckybarnex @eviemae263782 @piper570 @ibong-adarnaaa @spookysins @optimisticsandwichgladiator @marveltg365 @ringpopdust @gcidrvsh @beardsplitter @scaramou it wouldn’t let me tag the last few of you, let me know if its something with your settings, otherwise i can keep trying in future updates! <3      

[jerichojemini]

Rebecca Welton x Reader

It’s had been two years since you came to play for AFC Richmond’s Women’s Club. And it had been a year and 6 months since you’d started dating Rebecca Welton.

It was fun, sneaking kisses after practice, her ravishing you after you won a game. But it was starting to get more serious and you wanted to go public.

“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours,” Rebecca asked, as you both laid on her couch watching some reality tv show Keeley recommended.

“I don’t know,” You sighed as you fidgeting with the rings on Rebecca’s fingers.

“I think you do know,” You turned your head to face her, and she gave you a kiss. “But you’re just afraid to tell me.”

You nodded in agreement.

“Just tell me.”

You sighed mustering up all your courage.

“I think we’re pretty serious right,” You waited for her to respond.

“Of course.”

“So I was wondering if you wanted to go public,” You looked into her green eyes, trying to calm the doubt in your mind.

You weren’t out yet but it had been assumed by most of the team that you were a lesbian. Mostly because you never brought dates to galas or events and you never would indulge in girl talk about guys. Which it was true but sometime you wished they didn’t just assume.

And you were the first woman Rebecca had ever dated. At first you just thought you were her mid life crisis. Most people buy sport cars and date models. But you just thought she decided to try women. After month three it became apparent to you that, that wasn’t the case.

“Sure,” Rebecca answered turning back to the tv.

“Really,” Your eyes went wide.

“Yes,” Rebecca smiled.

You turned your whole body around, now straddling her.

“I love you so much, Rebecca,” You smiled brightly, leaning down to give her a kiss.

“I love you too, Y/N,” She smiled, as she kissed you.

———————

A few weeks later you came out to the team. There response was warm and welcoming. Though some of them, did stop talking to you. But you understood, you were the captain, and now you’re dating the owner of the club. Shit, if it were you, you’d probably do the same.

“So big game today,” Coach Lasso started to talk.

Ted Lasso was re hired as head coach for the women’s team around the same time you came here.

“That means bring your a game,” Coach Smith said.

Coach Ariana Smith was a 5’3 beast. You’d played one game against her, your first year playing professional soccer in America. A year after that she retired and a year after that she started coaching. Short, and fast she was able to maneuver around the field was grace. But she was the biggest shit talker you’d ever know.

You zoned out going over every play in your head. You all used unconventional methods since Coach Lasso originally coach American Football. And most of the time it worked.

Right before it was time to go out on to the field Rebecca decided to pay you a visit.

“You’re going to play well today,” Rebecca smirked as she gave you a kiss.

“I play well every time,” You joked.

“I know you do, I’m just teasing.”

Coach Smith walked over with the grumpy look that she always wore.

“Hey you better not be distracting my Captain.”

Coach smith was the only one who dared to speak to Rebecca that way.

“I’m not,” Rebecca said pulling away.

And surprisingly Rebecca always let her.

“I’m never distracted coach,” You responded.

Coach smith just gave you a look.

“Well I best be off, I just wanted to wish you good luck, so good luck.”

“Thank you,” You gave her one more kiss before she walked away.

—————-

It was the second half of the game. The other team was up 1 and it was looking down for AFC Richmond’s Women’s team. But you knew that there was still time left.

“Melissa,” You yelled.

She looked over as you signed 32 X. It was a play that you came up with. 32 because that was you number, and x because well it sounded cool to you.

She nodded understanding what you meant.

The play was successful earning a goal for your team. You were tied 1 to 1 and for you a tie was going to cut it.

So this time you call another play, one of your best ones. It was a sure fire way to get you to win. As the finally seconds ticked away on the clock, Delaney kicked the ball to you.

You took on deep breath as you kicked it, scoring the finally goal for Richmond. As the announcer said the finally score, you ripped your jersey off. Running around in just a Nike sports bar with your hands up.

It became your signature move, it wasn’t inventive but it made you feel powerful.

You search the owners box for Rebecca and found her green eyes looking at you with pride. An idea popped into your head and you just couldn’t shake it.

So you ran into the crowd, running up the steps to the owner box’s. Hoping over the wall that separated it from the rest of the crowd.

“What are you doing,” Rebecca laughed as you hopped over the wall.

“Coming to kiss you,” You pulled her close waiting for a nod of consent.

And once she did you gave her the kiss of a lifetime. You didn’t even realized the cameras were facing you as you did it. But once you looked up you saw you and Rebecca on the Jumbotron.

“I have to get back, you coming to celebrate,” You whispered.

She just nodded.

“See you later,” you said before jumping back over the wall and running down the stairs.

A/n: if you made it this far thank you. Also I might start doing requests after I finish that mirandy fanfic that I’ve been putting off for years and that whole greys anatomy series I forgot about

[ilovehugslikealotalot]

I NEED CHRISTMAS THEMED REBECCA WELTON X READER

maybe one where there’s angst where Y/n is really close with Rebecca and the team so she spends lots of time at the club and Rebecca is trying really hard to Show y/n that she loves her but y/n is completely oblivious, Rebecca spills to Keeley how much she loves y/n and Keeley tells y/n abt and surprises Rebecca or something.

you can alter things so it makes sense! ☺️

Make Your Wish Come True

Rebecca Welton x Fem!reader

(not my gif)

WARNING: MINORS DNI, cliffhanger ending?

❝ She’s showed me what love was supposed to be. I find my heart so full of her I can hardly call it my own❞

-Rebecca Welton

~~✿ஜீ۞ஜீ✿•.¸¸.•*•.•ஜீ☼۞☼ஜீ•.•*•.¸¸.•✿ஜீ۞ஜீ✿~~

“You know, I really don’t think she fancies me. I really just don’t seem her type, Keels” Y/n says, unconvinced of even the slightest possibility. “Oh come on! She totally fancies you!”

Keeley had known y/n since their middle school years. They’d always get into some chaos wherever they’d go, sometimes, (which means all the time) Keeley would be the one always in isolation for taking the pranks a bit too extravagant. One time, Keeley and Y/n egged their neighbors house. But, a certain someone took it a step too far and toilet papered his car and dyed his dog key lime green.

A year ago, Rebecca had met y/n whenever they had run into each other in the hallways of the FC. Of course, since Rebecca is Rebecca she was always quite professional, and with y/n being clumsy and always getting herself, sometimes others, injured with her recklessness.

Y/n was in a rush to get to Keeley on a particular Saturday, hearing heels clicking in the distance, y/n paid no mind, focusing entirely on her phone. “Y/n watch out!” A familiar voice shouted, but, before y/n could turn around her dance smashed into someone, someone tall, and blonde, and beautiful…

“Miss Y/l/n, I’d say to be careful, but we all know you’ll fall again,” Rebecca smiled, chuckling sweetly, making sure y/n didn’t trip and fall on the floor. Y/n freezes up slightly, but still manages to utter a coherent sentence. “Thank you, Becca,” The blonde woman nodded with the same charming smile and let go of y/n before walking off, a faint blush on her cheeks.

The two shorter women watched as Rebecca strutted away with her hips swaying perfectly as she went. “She wants you…”

“Not! I can only keep dreaming.” Y/n sighed dreamily staring at the mistletoe in the heavily decorated hallway. Ribbons and trees lined the tables, and festive lights seemed to burn your eyes.

“Maybe Santa can Make Your Wish Come True!” Keeley exclaimed, grabbing a Santa plushie off of her desk and squeaking it, causing the two to laugh.

——————————

Rebecca never thought she would find herself surrounded by the Ted’s little…friendship circle.

“So, uh, boss. What brings you here?” Ted smiles, his hands folder in his laugh. “Well..Uhm, I’m positive you all know y/n, correct?” Rebecca looks around, everyone nodding, listening intently. “I…I feel…strongly toward her,” she had worded it that way for a reason, she was quite unsure about this, the memories of her last relationship with Rupert still haunting her mind. “Strongly, how?” Nate asked, slightly squinting his eyes as if he knew what she was going to continue with, Rebecca sighed, “I like her, I really do” Higgins clapped his hands together, “I knew it!”

“Like or love?” Roy bluntly enjoined, the blonde stood there for a minute to finally admit to herself what she had register for long.

“Love.” She spoke barely above a whisper, Roy smirked, to tease Rebecca further he urged her to be louder, “Huh?”

“I said I love her! Okay?!”

That was they had needed. From that point forward, everybody in AFC Richmond knew about about Rebecca’s little plan. She gave y/n extravagant gifts, showered her in compliments, and flirted every chance she got. Yet, y/n and her infinite wisdom thought that Rebecca was being friendly. In all truth, the blonde was about to just come clean, so, to prepare herself, Rebecca goes on to tell Keeley about just how much she’s willing to go for y/n. Though, she might’ve already known.

At the little firm Keeley had been managing, Rebecca hastily made her way to her best-friend’s office. A state of panic washed over her, she really just didn’t know what to do, she’d never dated a woman so this was all knew to her. “Keeley?” The taller woman called, opening the door, “Becca! What’s this about, y/n? Did you finally snog her?”

Keeley was one to be quite blunt when it came to romantic questions. “No, sadly” Rebecca chuckled joylessly, tossing her bag on Keeley’s office couch. Keeley frowned, hating the look on Rebecca’s face, “Man, is she really that blind?” She joked, chuckling at Rebecca’s little smile, “why don’t you just tell her? She likes you, isn’t it obvious at this point?” Rebecca looked at up at her in disbelief, “you’re joking?” Keeley almost screamed, these two were a bunch of idiots. For a literal month, these two had been pining for each other, they’ve been flirting non-stop and yet they still don’t know if the other likes the other? Jesus Christ, they were going to be the death of her.

Rebecca jumped out of her seat and ran to her car, the snow falling gracefully as the cold hit her cheeks. Buttoning her jacket to keep warm, she dialed a certain someone’s phone number..

[peterpparkrr]

Banter (Ch. 4)

Series: Banter

Pairing: Roy Kent x f!Reader

Summary: Sam has his restaurant’s soft open. You and Roy spend the night together. No! Not like that!

A/N: I cried twice during this week's episode, how are you guys doing?

(Ch. 1) (Ch. 2) (Ch. 3) // (Ch. 5)

series masterlist

"Keeley..." You singsong as you walk up to where she and Rebecca are staking a claim in front of the bartender.

"What did you say to Roy?" You ask her as you lean your face toward hers, making an effort to keep your voice low seeing as the man in question is only on the other side of this relatively small restaurant.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean," Keeley replies with such a convincing tone of innocence that you’d almost believe her if it weren’t for the fact that Roy Kent was staring at you with such unabashed intensity that you felt like you might combust.

"He's...looking at me," You whisper-hiss in her direction. Causing both women to look over your shoulder to where Roy is sitting with Jamie Tartt, Jamie going on about something while Roy continues to stare in your direction.

“God, he really is intense, isn’t he?” Rebecca comments as she turns back to you, sipping her drink. 

You purse your lips to keep yourself from snapping at your newfound friend. 

You know this is amusing to Keeley and Rebecca, everything about your love life is amusing to these women, but you’re having a hard time laughing about it when everyone else knows just as much about your business as you do. And how it sometimes feels like they know stuff you don’t know. 

“I need to know why all of that intensity is aimed in my direction, and Keeley’s my best bet,” You reply as you stare at your best friend expectantly. 

“Nothing! I just encouraged him to explore the relationship- friendship between you two!” Keeley defends.

“Go say hi to your new friend,” She adds as she prods at your side.

You sigh but move to say hello to him anyway.

Jamie has disappeared off to somewhere else by the time you move to this side of the room.

"Hi... friend," You greet Roy as you come up to him with an awkward smile, your hand coming up in a half-wave, half-fist bump that just makes it look like you greet people by punching the air.

Cool.

"Right," Roy replies gruffly as he frowns down at you. 

"This place is nice, I'm impressed," You comment as you glance around the space.

When Keeley had invited you and explained that one of the AFC Richmond players had started a restaurant you kind of expected it to be like most celebrity-owned establishments, completely detached from that person other than the use of their name to get people in the door. With little care for anything other than making money.

But you were pleasantly surprised, Sam clearly had a lot of oversight here as owner, he was helping deliver plates to people’s tables, checking in with the chef, and making the rounds to ensure everyone was having a good time. 

Not to mention the fact that the food looked absolutely amazing.

Sam cared a lot about sharing his culture and food. And it showed.

"Maybe Sam should quit and become a full-time restaurateur,” You comment as the man in question sneaks around the two of you with two plates in his hands.

"Don't you fucking dare put that idea in his head," Roy replies. “The team needs him.”

"You'd figure it out,” You say with a wave of your hand. “Ted and Beard are both pretty smart guys," You add with a small smile.

"And you too, I guess," You add with a sigh, smiling at Roy as he takes your teasing remarkably well given your past. 

"How have you been?" Roy asks you.

"Oh, um, good," You reply with a nod. “You?” 

“Shit,” Roy replies.

“Oh… um…” You stammer as you glance at his expression nervously. Only to see him staring back at you as straight-faced as always but with a glimmer of something behind his eyes that has your short-lived anxiety quickly morphing into relief and amusement. 

“You’re fucking with me, aren’t you?” You reply as you hit his upper arm with your palm. 

“Yeah, glad you finally noticed,” Roy replies.

You smile up at him for a moment before a server with another platter of delicious-looking food walks past you. 

“Watching all of this food come out is making me extremely jealous, do you want to order some food to share?” You ask as you gesture toward an open table in the corner.

“Yeah,” Roy replies. 

As you move to sit down you miss the look that Roy and Keeley share.

As it turns out, talking to Roy is easy.

You’d initially been a little worried that with your nervous energy and hatred of long pauses that trying to make conversation would be like pulling teeth, but once the two of you get going you can’t stop. 

“What do you mean?!” You shout as Roy finishes telling you the story of how his ex-girlfriend stole his Rolex and sold it for drug money.

“I said what I said,” Roy replies.

You burst into laughter at the whole story. 

“Uh oh,” You mutter as you see Sam out of the corner of your eye start to put chairs up on the tables. 

And then you glance around to realize everyone else is gone except for Sam and his employees.

Keeley and Rebecca had bid you goodnight a little while ago but everyone else had still been here then.

“I think Sam is trying to very politely tells us to fuck off,” Roy replies as you pull your phone out of your bag to realize how late it’s gotten. 

And get a glimpse at a series of texts from Keeley almost exclusively consisting of emojis including but not limited to the peach, eggplant, and explosion emojis.

“Do you want to go get a drink? There’s a pub down the road that makes good cocktails,” You ask Roy when you turn back to him. 

“Yeah,” Roy replies as he moves to stand up.

“Thanks for tonight, Sam, this place is seriously amazing, it’s going to be a huge success, I can already tell,” You tell Sam with a smile as you and Roy make your way to the door.

“Good food,” Roy adds from beside you.

“Thank you so much for coming,” Sam replies with a grin. “And I hope you’ll stop in again soon.”

“Oh, we will,” You reply without even thinking about it before you head out with one last wave.

We. You said we. Putting you and Roy into a shared unit without even thinking about it. 

And you didn’t hate it.

As your brain spirals Roy switches over the walk on your other side, his hand ghosting the small of your back as he places himself between you and the road. A move that you’ve only read about in books. Or heard about on TikTok from people who apparently have better boyfriends than you’ve ever had.

The spiral pops an embarrassing story of your own into your brain.

“I once had a boyfriend who was stealing money from my wallet and when I caught him he claimed it was a ‘boyfriend tax’,” You blurted out as you glanced over at Roy. Filling the silence with your rambling.

“Your terrible ex story reminded me,” You add. 

Roy looks down at you and stops dead in his tracks as he turns to face you more completely. You stop walking too and take a step back to glance back at him.  

“What was his name?” Roy asks. 

“Br– wait, I’m not telling you that,” You stop yourself when you realize what he means. “I can’t let you go to jail for murder.”

“You don’t know that it was going to be murder,” Roy replies.

You laugh.

“C’mon,” You say as you loop your arm around Roy’s and pull him along to come with you. “Let’s go get that drink. Maybe I’ll tell you his name after I’ve had a few.”

After the change in locations you’re ready for the mood to shift and for you to down a quick drink and bug out as whatever weird truce you and Roy have going on fizzles. But the conversation continues to flow even better as the two of you share a few more drinks.

Once it becomes truly too late that even the bar crowd is starting to think Roy offers to walk you home.

"Thanks for walking me home," You tell Roy when you reach the door to your flat. "I'd ask you to come in but it's probably way past your bedtime with practice tomorrow."

"Yeah," Roy replies.

"Tonight was fun, I'm glad we were able to break the ice," You say as you glance down at Roy’s lips. Waiting for him to look at you and do the same. 

But his eyes don’t move from the top half of your face.

"Me too.”

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow- today technically," You add.

"Goodnight, (Y/N)," Roy says with a small smile.

"Goodnight," You reply.

And then Roy turns on his heels and walks down the hallway.

You watch him disappear down the staircase before you turn and shove your key into your door.

"Goodnight," You mutter to yourself as you push open your door. "What the fuck?!" 

[alwritey-aphrodite]

Never Looked Back

Prologue of There’s Nothing Like This

Series Masterlist

Pairing: Jamie Tartt x fem!footballer!reader

Warnings: none :)

Word Count: 1.3k

Author’s Note: the rest of the chapters will have more Jamie and more words. Shoutout to @buckychristwrites for letting me word vomit to her and to my wife @andr0medafallen for being a supportive baddie

Flying has never been your favorite thing, and as you begin your descent over London, you’re reminded of the last time you’d flown this far. You’d been seventeen, alone and anxious and on your way to Chelsea, brimming with excitement over finally reaching your dream.

Not even seven months later you were on your way home, ligaments torn and joints aching in a way you’ll never get rid of.

Now, sitting for so long makes your hips cramp and your knees lock and you can feel your ankle swell and pulsate with pain. You know your back would start cramping if you weren’t landing, so you have something small to be thankful for. Really, you’re just lucky that you have a few days to recover before training begins.

It hits you how pathetic it is that you, a professional footballer, need to recover from a plane ride. You try not to let it bother you, try not to wallow in self pity and hatred the way you did when you were 17, laying on your mother’s couch post-op and believing your life was over.

If only you could see yourself now, on your way to join the brand new AFC Richmond women’s team.

The idea of leaving the US was nerve-wracking, but you simply couldn’t pass up the opportunity to play in England again, to try one more time to achieve a dream you’d had since you were a little girl. It was so clear that everyone you talked with truly believed in creating a space for women, to support them and push the sport forward, and that starting a women’s team wasn’t simply a way to keep up with other clubs, to stay relevant.

As the plane lands, you finally allow yourself to feel excited in that same giddy way you did the last time you made this journey. You were finally one step closer to making your dreams come true, and you weren’t going to let your negative thoughts and fears ruin it for you.

The entire ride to Nelson Road, you couldn’t help but let that giddy excitement course through your veins, feeling like you’re a little kid again and on your way to your first day of school. You can’t help but wonder who’ll be in your class, who your teacher will be. The Richmond women’s team has been kept fairly quiet, and you have practically no idea what you’re getting yourself into.

Walking through the doors, your nerves start to build again, and you think your heart is going to beat right through your ribs as you make your way to the front desk. Before you start speaking, you need to take a deep breath or else you’re worried you’ll collapse, and that seems like bad luck considering you’re here to be an athlete.

“Hi, I’m here-“

“I know why you’re here,” the receptionist cuts you off and you’d be upset if she wasn’t beaming at you, “Ms. Welton is waiting for everyone in her office.”

The receptionist shows you the way, gesturing up a grand staircase that gives you plenty of time to freak out some more, your anxiety only growing the closer you get to the owner's office. As you open the door, you wonder if it’s too late to turn and run and catch a flight back to America.

All those feelings disappear when you see one of the other players talking with a gorgeously tall woman, and you can’t help but to squeal despite how unprofessional you know it makes you look.

“Mackie!” You yell out, causing the other woman to turn towards you, a grin blooming on her face when she notices you. Claire McKenzie had been one your best friends since you both debuted for the US team together at twenty years old, bonded by your age and your bench riding skills.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” She asks as she pulls you into a tight embrace, completely forgetting about everyone else in the room.

“I’m here to play some fucking football!” You reply, feeling ten times lighter than you did in the hallway now that you know you have Mackie on your side.

Breaking apart from the hug, you feel everyone’s eyes on you and you’re wishing the floor could just open up and swallow you when the woman who must be Rebecca Welton smiles kindly at you.

“I’m glad to know some of you ladies are already friends,” she says, the room breaking into laughter and the weight lifting off of your chest.

After everyone had arrived, she took the time to introduce herself and the few other non-players in the room, including Keeley Jones, the true mastermind behind the Richmond women’s team. No matter how much this team means to you, to the rest of the team, to Rebecca, it means ten times more to Keeley. This was her idea, her baby, and you can already feel the pride and excitement radiating off of her at the sight of the team gathered before her.

You’re determined to win it all for her.

“This is Coach Kent, and Beard and Nathan Shelley will be your assistant coaches until we can find someone to fill those spots permanently,” Rebecca says with a smile, but you can all feel the tension coursing underneath the surface.

“So no one wanted to coach us?” A voice from the back of the room asks, and it’s like you’ve been drenched in freezing cold water now that somebody’s said it out loud.

“No one has expressed interest… yet,” Rebecca adds, trying to keep up her jovial facade as the players start to mutter to each other. It feels like you’re in gym class again, standing and hoping and praying you get picked for dodgeball but knowing you’ll be last again.

“Oi! I fucking want to coach you, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t,” Roy says, sounding angry but you can’t quite place what he’s truly feeling, “and these two want to fucking coach you.” Beard and Nate nod, Roy crossing his arms across his chest as your murmurs die down, placated by his statements.

“With the limited space and limited coaching staff, there will be some days where you share training with the boys, but we’re all one big family here,” Rebecca adds, and you can tell by now that the smile plastered on her face is fake, that she’s trying to convince herself as much as she’s trying to convince you.

As you wrap up in the office and head downstairs to see the dressing room, you can’t help but feel as if the entire world’s against the team, against you. All you know right now is that you’re going to need to work ten times harder than everyone else to prove yourself to the fans, to the media, to the world.

Passing by the men’s dressing room, you briefly lock eyes with someone walking towards the pitch, who smiles as you pass. It’s so quick that your brain isn’t able to process who it is, so you try to forget it and follow the rest of the team to the brand new women’s dressing room.

The players rush into the room as if the floodgates opened, everyone trying to find their kit and their name and their number. As much as you want to play it cool, want to make a good first impression on Rebecca and Keeley and the coaches, you can’t help but grin and run with the other girls, everyone giddy as they see the kits in person.

When you finally find yours, you can’t help the tears that spring to your eyes.

It’s the classic Richmond blue, with your name in bold white above a large number nine.

It’s as if everything you’ve ever wanted is right in front of you: you’re a striker on a team you care about. You know it’s going to be an uphill battle, know you’re going to need to prove yourself over and over and over, but right now, with your kit in your hand, your team laughing and smiling around you, you think you can face it.

Tags: @andr0medafallen @buckychristwrites @benedictscanvas @whimsical-roasting @sokkigarden @scaramou @guccilongboard @onceuponaoneshot @presidential-facts @yepyeahuhhuh @loveslide @allthefandomtherapy @gibby31 @buddyjuststop @ellietartt @cancvr @rae4725 @brianandthemays @sonyume @aiyaiy @captainfrisbee @dalebo3 @theloud-yet-quietone @imsoluckyeverythingworksoutforme @rockchickrebel @legobatmans9thab @curlypeter @lostinwonderland314 @yokolesbianism @jamietarttdodo @kno-way-home @nicklet94 @fan-goddess @innocentbi-stander

[daydreamgoddess14]

Support System - Epilogue

CH1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4 | CH 5 | CH 6 | CH 7 | CH 8 | CH 9 | CH 10

MASTERLIST

Just a little ending continuation for you. That's all folks - we're definitely done now 😘 Under the cut so you don't get spoiled before reading Chapter 10!

Epilogue

You got back to Nelson Road from a Fab Four lunch where you’d celebrated the sign off of the AFC Richmond Women’s team. The new season was still only a couple of months in, but the change in jobs had so far been incredible. You needn't have worried about getting on with Keeley, or about Rebecca’s terrifying reputation. The four of you gelled perfectly together, and it only improved when you called in the coaching staff reinforcements. The ethos, philosophy and culture of the club had never been so ingrained in its leadership before and it had helped the club go from strength to strength. You’d stopped by the bakery on the way back to the stadium for a box of cupcakes for Ted, Coach Beard, Roy and Nate and left Rebecca at the foot of her stairs so you could carry on and deliver them.

“I’ll come too, see Ted.” She’d followed you through the changing room. You could hear the team in the gym, the coaches were all in the office except for Roy. 

“Oh. Hiya fellas, seen Roy? I texted him when I left Ola’s.” You looked around as if you were half expecting him to be hiding by his desk, but he wasn't around at all. 

"Haven't seen him in a hot minute, sorry." Ted had replied, eyes only for Rebecca. Nate had gone to check on the players in the gym, Beard had his head buried in his book. 

"Guess I'll leave these here then. Tell him to come and say hi when he turns up?" You asked Beard who tipped his hat. Your afternoon focused on branding opportunities for the women’s team, you’d had some logo ideas you wanted to run by a few people so took the chance to stretch your legs. You said hello to the team in the ticket office, looked in on the players in the gym, “Anyone seen Roy?”

“Nah, sorry!”

“He’s around here somewhere I think.”

“I thought I saw him in the boot room.”

“Not the boot room you melon, the treatment room.” As you received at least 14 different answers, you held up your hand,

“Never mind! Thanks boys.” You carried on up to Rebecca’s office where she was meeting with Sharon, “Sorry, am I interrupting?”

“Not at all, are they the logo options?” Rebecca held out a hand,

“Sure is, seen Roy?”

“I think he’s downstairs.” Sharon smiled.

“He’s got a meeting with me at 4.30 so he’ll be about somewhere.”

“I know, I’m getting Lexie today. Let me know what you think of those and we’ll catch up tomorrow. Bye both.��� You left the office and went via your own office to get your things. In the carpark, Roy’s car had gone. Because of his late meeting with Rebecca, you’d gone in separately that morning. You swung into the school car park and waited at the main doors to be let in.

“Oh, I’m sorry - Lexie’s already left today? Phoebe’s uncle collected her?” You rolled your eyes, he’d forgotten about his meeting with Rebecca.

“Ok, not to worry, thanks!” You jumped back in the car and used the voice control to call him. There was no answer so you carried on to your house. You expected to see his car, but it wasn’t there. This was starting to get annoying. You hopped out of the car and went to put your key in the lock, but it wouldn’t fit. “What the fucking fuck is going on today?!” You looked through your key bundle but your house key wasn’t there, it had fallen off. Back in the car, you tried to work out whether he’d have taken Lexie back to the club for his meeting. He still didn’t answer the phone so you went straight to his house. His car was on the drive, you breathed a sigh of relief. The door was locked so you rang the bell and waited for Lexie to answer. Nothing. You rang the bell again. At your hip level, the letterbox flipped open,

“You need to use your key.” Lexie whispered.

“I don’t have a fucking key?” It had been on your to-do list for the last few weeks since you and Roy had talked about it. You already had a spare for your house and easily handed it over to him. You looked back down at your keys and saw a new, different key where your house key had been. The letterbox closed again, you slid the new key into the door handle and it clicked smoothly, the door opening. Just inside, Roy and Lexie were standing with a house shaped helium balloon and a little cake made in the shape of Roy’s house. Everything fell into place in your brain. “I do have a key.” You realised.

“If you want it?”

“Roy’s decorated my bedroom!” Lexie squealed, his hand clamped over her mouth gently,

“Oi! Don’t ruin it!” She giggled and swung herself around using his arm as leverage. You looked up at him,

“Not just a key?”

“I was thinking we could move in together? I never want to know a world without you both.” You couldn’t stop the tears even if you’d tried, you rushed into his arms.

“We’d love to.”

FIN

[multifandominfj]

Picture this:

Kathryn Hahn as the Coach of the AFC Richmond Women’s team should Ted Lasso come back/get a spin off.

[jamiefartt]

run the world; part one.

masterlist, part 2.

pairings: Jamie Tartt x reader, a bit of Sam Obisanya x reader.

summary: as the striker for AFC Richmond's very first women's team, the pressure is on. you're desperate to bond with the men's team, especially their number 9. so when your captains make you two train together, you find special ways to make it fun for both of you.

words: 10.6k

warnings: mean Jamie obvi, no smut but def some sexual jokes and tension, alcohol and chugging but nothing gross.

———

metal studs click against the ground as you bounce on the balls of your feet. stretching your neck, you look down at your blue boots before craning your neck back up, eyes gliding over the number 8 in front of you and moving towards the ceiling. the dugout is hot and tense, shoulders grazing those of the opposing team. Manchester United's red and yellow kit starkly contrasts the pink and purple of yours, and while their socks are black, yours are a bright white. you bring your right hand up to your chest, rubbing small circles as you try soothing your heart. sliding it down, you trace the large letters printed on the front of your shirt; KBPR. loud music plays over the speakers of Nelson Road Stadium, and you try make out the words over the screams of the crowds. you take a few more deep breaths before suddenly, you're feet are carrying you on to the pitch as if on autopilot. 

facing forward, you almost get lost in the swing of the ponytail in front of you, shaking your head and clapping your hands together, forcing your mind into focus. the crowd's cheers tenfold the more players appear from the tunnel, and you look around at the sea of colours in the crowd. you spot a lot of Richmond's bantr branded jerseys in the sea of people, appreciating their effort to support your team despite repping the wrong colours. 

"let's go ladies!" you hear someone roar beside you as you approach the middle of the pitch. your head snaps to your left, finding the source of the encouragement. Isaac McAdoo, Richmond men's captain, is leaning over the side screen next to the pitch, borderline folding his torso over it with two fists in the air. next to him, all the Richmond boys line the sideline, all dressed in the women's kit. they clap, cheer, and holler for you all as you make your way to the center circle, stopping right before it to stand shoulder-to-shoulder. 

as much as you want to wave to the guys, you're too in your zone, having gotten into game mode in the dugout. you take a few more deep breaths, looking straight ahead of you with a stone cold expression on your face. you look directly at Roy, your team's manager, who matches your demeanor. the teams are introduced, and you take in the crowd's encouragement when Richmond is called out. once dismissed from the line up, you drop to your position in the centre of the pitch. you roll your right sock midway down your shin before pulling the left one up and over your knee, ready to use your right foot to carry your team to victory. 

your head goes quiet as you take deep breaths, ignoring the players in front of you, faces and sounds blurring in your mind as you become completely calm. looking around, everyone's faces become unrecognisable as your brain stops registering them, full focus on the ball currently being carried towards you. your team captain, Gia, holds the ball towards you, clearly having won the coin toss. her face is the only one you can decipher, and she smiles at you despite your inability to return the gesture with the cold expression that comes from your focus.

"fucking kill 'em." she mutters to you, pushing the ball into your hands. you give her a curt nod as you watch her features merge together into an indistinguishable blur. the only thing you can see is the ball, which you place firmly at your feet, and the goal miles away from you. twisting the football into the grass, you take one last deep breath, anxiously awaiting the referee's whistle to signal your cue to kick off the match. in your mind, the stadium goes quiet, even though you know the noise is still deafening. to you, all that matters is the football, your feet, and your role in the team. it's one of your biggest matches of the season, and in order to keep your position as striker you need to impress. Roy trusts you, and knows you can do it, but more often than not your nerves get the best of you, and that way you find it hard to trust yourself.

the first whistle blows, then the halftime whistle, and eventually the final whistle rings through your ears as the crowd roars. you sprint to the side of the pitch, heading straight for Roy as you scream. you wrap your arms around his shoulders and his hand smacks your back. you let go and turn around, Gia running straight into you and holding you tight. as she hugs you, you feel more and more arms press around your frame as your teammates come in for a group hug. the supporters chant and shout for your team, celebrating your 3-2 win. it was tight, and the result was set to be a tie until you scored on a whim in injury time. 

you and the girls jump up and down, studs tapping the ground rhythmically as they chant your name. cackling with a loud grin on your face, you're well aware of how hard you're blushing at the praise and attention. you've redeemed your position on the team, knowing you'll be safe as number nine for the rest of the season. 

when the pressure around your shoulders loosens, you let go of Gia and lean forward, hands on your knees as you take a few deep breaths. you feel hands slap your back and shoulders in celebration, and the odd hand on your ass as a joke from your friends. your eyes are glued to the grass, noticing how each blade points in a different direction. you notice where they've been flattened by studded boots, how they move in the wind, and even the angle at which they've been cut. 

a firm hand on your shoulder interrupts your thinking, and your attention returns to the actual matters at hand. lifting your head, you blink a few times to bring your mind back to the pitch. it's Roy, who silently nods towards the dugout, signaling you to head to the locker room. standing up straight, you huff a sigh before letting an ecstatic smile return to your face. jogging to catch up with your team, you place your hands on Gia's shoulders and hop into the air. the two of you laugh together as the team continues their celebratory shouting all the way to your changing room. 

the noise echoes through the stairway as you all flood upstairs, clapping each other on the back and hugging. once you're all in the dressing room, it doesn't stop. you all huddle in the middle of the room and jump up and down as you chant: "we're Richmond till we die! we're Richmond till we die! we know we are, we're sure we are, we're Richmond till we die!" 

you're the first to notice the new presence in the room as you stop singing and tap the shoulders of the teammates around you. "guys, guys," you say, trying to get them to turn their attention to Rebecca and Keeley who have just walked in behind Roy. with a satisfied smile on her face, Rebecca winks at you, and you swear your heart almost stops beating in your chest. 

"oi!" Roy shouts, finally gaining the attention of the team. he says nothing else, simply cocking his head towards the two women next to him.

"hello ladies," Rebecca says, contentment evident in her voice as well as her expression.

"girls!" Keeley squeals, "you were fucking phenomenal!" she screams as she claps her hands, and everyone immediately matches her energy, clapping and cheering with her.

"yes, indeed," Rebecca interrupts the celebration, "you were all absolutely amazing!" 

Keeley continues, smiling up at Rebecca; "which is why we've brought you guys a present... boys, come on in!" 

one by one, the Richmond men's team file into the room; Isaac at the front, carrying a bucket of beer bottles, and the rest of the team behind him. they all crowd into the room, and suddenly the spacious changing room starts to feel cramped. you're even a tad embarrassed; you've just come off the pitch so you're sweaty and tired, and your hair is barely even tied up in its elastic anymore. brushing down your shirt, you quickly tighten your ponytail and flatten the top, hoping you look even slightly presentable for the guys. it's not that you want to impress them, but you can't say they're particularly unattractive, so you do your best to smile nicely and stand up straight. 

looking down at your feet, you quickly adjust your socks, pushing them both down to the edge of your boots. when you flick your head back up, your eyes meet those of one of the men in front of you. you recognise him immediately; he's Jamie Tartt, Richmond's star striker. of course, you wouldn't dare keep your eyes on him, so you look away quickly. you share a number with him, but you're nowhere near his level at the game.

"girls, I feel like I can confidently say that you all made AFC Richmond incredibly proud today," Isaac begins, booming voice commanding the room, "and we thought that should be celebrated our way!" he drops the bucket of drink at his feet before taking a step back, crossing his arms over his chest. Gia runs towards him, standing in front of the bucket and holding her hands out to stop the girls from approaching.

"wait!" she shouts, "first, a drink for the woman of the match..." a few people's heads turn towards you as you stand with a cheeky grin on your face, knowing it's you. you wouldn't say you're necessarily a cocky person, but you're pretty sure your goal today will go down as one of your best. your captain continues; "y/n! come up here, bitch!" 

you stride towards her and Isaac hands you a bottle. easily twisting off the cap with your hand, the girls ooh and aah as you wink at them. they all clap and yell as you chug as much as you can. with a grimace on your face, you shake your head, struggling to swallow the cheap beer. one of the guys smacks your shoulder and you hear him laugh, but your eyes are screwed shut tight as you drink even more, so you can't see who it is. when the last drop of the bottle is drained, you turn it upside down in front of you, nothing spilling out. Gia is the first to go crazy, jumping onto your back and cheering. the whole room erupts in shouts and whoops, and you can feel the beer fizz in your stomach as you laugh. you carry Gia away from the bucket, and everyone rushes forward, reaching for a bottle and cracking them open for each other. you pass on a second beer for now, craving nothing but water after all the excitement. 

as much as you share a building, you don't often cross paths with Richmond's men's team. you've been to a few of their games, though, Gia insisting all of you go to show your support, but you've never met them face to face. as you stand off to the side of the crowd, you drag your eyes across them, noticing the height disparities, the flashing smiles, and some of the most beautiful hair you've ever seen. interrupting your thoughts, Isaac lifts his bottle into the air, and shouting: "to Richmond!" everyone repeats him, lifting their drinks in the air before cheering.

as everyone turns to each other and dive into their own conversations, the divide between your team and the men's shrinks as they all start to mingle. smiling at the sight, you move to the left of the room towards your assigned cabinet. bringing your right foot onto the bench, you lean forward to untie your laces. as you swap legs and pull the laces on your right foot, you feel a hand on your shoulder. 

"y/l/n?" the voice is gruff and deep, their hand still holding your shoulder as you stand up straight. you turn your head, immediately smiling at the sight of Isaac.

"Isaac!" you laugh, lifting an arm as you beckon for a hug. he wraps an arm over your shoulder, clapping your back as you embrace.

"congratulations, bruv. you fucking smashed it," he says with an uncharacteristically wide grin. you smile back at him, a humble expression on your face at his kind words. you fold your hands over the navy Richmond crest on your shirt; "all thanks to Keeley and Rebecca," 

"they've done a good job with you lot," he nods, crossing his arms over his chest, "I want you to meet someone." 

he nods his head to the side, and your eyes follow the direction before landing on Sam Obisanya. standing behind his captain with his arms folded politely behind his back, his wide grin is infectious. he bows slightly forward and says: "it's so lovely to meet you, y/n. I'm Sam," 

your smile grows at his sweet tone as you wave a hand in greeting; "hi Sam! I'm y/n, but I guess you already know that," he laughs at your words, and you feel compelled to do the same. 

"I'll leave you two to chat." Isaac interjects, slapping a hand on Sam's back and pushing him closer to you. Sam winces through a smile, chuckling nervously at the set-up. with his captain at a fair distance from the two of you, he relaxes a bit more.

"you were so good out there," he says genuinely, eyes locked firmly on yours.

"thank you so much, that means a lot coming from you." 

"really?" his grin morphs into a smirk, "how come?"

you feel a blush creep onto your cheeks; "I mean, I've seen you play -- you're such a key player for Richmond. you're assist against Chelsea last month was fucking incredible! you make it look so fun and effortless..." you stop talking mid-ramble, noticing how you're supposed to be pretending you've just met him, not like you've been to every match he's ever played.

"thank you, y/n, I really appreciate it. when you play, it's hard to watch anybody else on that pitch."

his words stun you, and all you can do is blink up at him in disbelief. the genuine smile on his face accompanies his sentiment, warming your heart. you're not sure what to say, so you glance down at the ground as you try to subdue the blush on your cheeks with a few deep breaths. "how come you guys came to this match?" you ask, desperate to change the topic.

"Ted said it would be good to bond the two teams a bit more, and I agree! you know, I always wanted to come to one of the women's matches but couldn't find anybody to come with me. that's why tonight, to celebration for your win, I'm hosting everyone at my restaurant with an open bar!" 

"Oh woah, Sam that's so generous. you really don't have to do that," you smile at him again, and his bright smile is fixed as he waves his hand and tsks; "don't worry about it. I love having people at Ola's, especially my team, so why not include you guys- or girls, whatever." 

the two of you share a laugh again, and you find your heart skipping a beat every time you hear the sound escape Sam's lips. your gaze drops from his as you flick your eyes past him, only to see Jamie staring at you from across the room. you don't linger, just look back at Sam to continue talking, but you find it hard to fully listen to him when you can now feel the other man's eyes burning into your face. subconsciously, your hands come back up to your ponytail, making sure the hairs are as tidy as you can get them in your post-game state. why is Jamie Tartt looking at you? 

once everyone's finished their beers, you say goodbye to Sam and the other players before all heading for the showers. you let cold water cascade down your back, goosebumps covering your whole body at the feeling. the shower room is steamy and scorching hot, and the contrast between the air and your water temperature brings a certain peace to your mind. you and your teammates laugh and chatter around you, making fun of the opposition and talking about the guys who came to celebrate with you. with your eyes closed, you let the water hit your face, and it cools the nerves talking to Sam gave you. 

his smile could light up an entire stadium, and he's so kind and chivalrous. he's the only Richmond men's player you've actually ever noticed around the building since he always smiles at everyone. you've seen him laughing and talking with the most random people in the hallway, from the secretary to physiotherapist. you try to do the same, saying hello and goodbye to everyone you pass everyday, and you're pretty sure people appreciate you for it. but Sam seems to genuinely have a place in his heart for everyone, especially the fans. you've seen him interact with them before and after matches, and it's not that you always keep to yourself, you just know there's a zone you need to be in to be able to play football the best you can, and that zone doesn't include other people. 

after your shower, you get changed into a simple pair of blue jeans and a white blouse, some mascara highlighting your eyelashes. if it was up to you, you would be leaving Nelson Road the same way you arrived; in your Richmond branded tracksuit. but when Gia saw you reach for the purple joggers her eyes shot you daggers, so you grabbed the extra outfit she instructs you all bring to every match. "you never know where you'll end up." she always says, and you all oblige. you can't complain though, Gia is your best friend, both at Richmond and in your daily life. you share a place in town, a cozy but spacious attached home, and you wouldn't have it any other way. you all voted her as captain because of her open mind and her free-spirited approach to football. she doesn't see it as a job, she still sees it as a hobby, and it's how she succeeds. having fun is the key to everything in her life, and as much as you wish you were like that, you put way too much pressure on yourself. it used to be fun for you, a hobby you get to do professionally, but you feel more and more disconnected from that with every game.

you drop into her passenger seat, throwing your bag on the backseat behind you. without asking, you connect your phone to her car's bluetooth and turn on your shared playlist. Gia gets comfortable in the driver's seat as you press shuffle, and the two of you squeal when your favourite Justin Bieber song starts playing. the bass pumps through the car as she pulls out of the Richmond gates, heading to Sam's restaurant. both of you sing along loudly to the music, and you direct the lyrics towards her in a dramatic lip sync. it's easy to laugh with Gia, and you're grateful for the friendship you built with her before coming to Richmond. having grown up together, she got you into football, and eventually you both climbed up the same ladders to get to the same premier league team. if you hadn't had Gia in the beginning stages of the development of Richmond's women's team, you're not too sure you would have made it past the first qualification rounds. but thankfully, she's always been there to cheer you up and lift your spirit, reminding you constantly to try to enjoy football, not fear it.

she turns down the next song, and you groan in frustration; "I like this song!" you whine. 

"I saw you talking to Sam in the dressing room," she teases, ignoring your annoyance. 

"yeah... Isaac introduced us. have you ever spoken to him? he's so unbelievably friendly, I genuinely can't imagine him ever getting angry."

Gia huffs, shaking her head with a chuckle before responding: "you haven't seen him with Mister Jamie Tartt. he can seriously get on his nerves. Isaac tells me about it sometimes and Sam doesn't let Jamie off easily," 

"well I think your boyfriend was trying to set us up, and I didn't appreciate it."

"yup! he definitely was..." Gia laughs as you roll your eyes. Isaac and Gia have been together since last season, before you had even played any matches. when she was elected captain, Roy thought it would be good to have the two meet and get close, just in case they needed any advice from each other down the line. at first, they would meet for weekly coffees, and soon enough he would be sitting on your sofa when you and Gia came home from late night trainings. 

"Sam is lovely, don't get me wrong, but I don't know if we mesh romantically, you know?" you say, looking out the window at setting sun over the brick buildings of Richmond.

"why not? Isaac told me Sam's had a bit of a crush on you for quite a while, so..."

you snap your head around to look at Gia; "he what?"

"yeah... I mean, from what Isaac tells me, he loves watching you train. he often comes to watch us with Isaac when they're on break or whatever," Gia shrugs casually, and you look at her with wide eyes. 

"why didn't you tell me this earlier? I had no idea he was watching! I didn't even think he knew me before today! God, that's so embarrassing, Gia..." you groan, rubbing your hands down your cheeks dramatically.

"what?! it's fine, y/n, look- I just wanted you to meet him first. if you didn't click I wouldn't be telling this," 

"how do you know if we clicked?"

"babe," she states curtly, "I saw you blushing and rambling. it was so cute! he walked away with such a big smile," 

"oh my God! shut up!" you exclaim, turning towards the window to hide how red you're going. with a deep sigh, you shake your head, and Gia leaves you alone with your thoughts as she keeps the music low. Sam is amazing -- he's a genuinely lovely guy, and a great footballer. admittedly, he made you blush, and smile, and feel all fuzzy inside. but your mind can't help but drift to the dark blue eyes you kept meeting across the room.

pulling into a parking spot one street down from the restaurant, the music stops suddenly as Gia stops the car, and you're pulled from your thinking. "come on," Gia says, "it's gonna be so much fun! you need to talk to Sam some more." rolling your eyes, you push your door open. you hop out of the car with an excited smile, looking forward to celebrate with your team. 

as you start walking up the street towards Ola's, you ask Gia: "do you reckon Jamie will be there?"

Gia's head snaps up to look at you, and her brow furrows in confusion as she scans your face for any ounce of humour. your face stays neutral, however, as you try your hardest to look inconspicuous. "uh- I'm not sure... why?" Gia asks you hesitantly. 

"just wondering," you shrug, avoiding her gaze.

"y/n," she stops walking, grabbing your elbow to hold you back, "do you have a thing for Jamie? oh my god, is that why you don't wanna pursue things with Sam?" 

shaking your head, you shrug again; "I'm not planning anything with him, Gia, chill." you try your best at a reassuring tone, and hope it goes unnoticed. her eyes are skeptical as she squints at you, her hand still holding your elbow. "I just think I should meet him since we play the same position! he's kind of a legend in the making, you have to admit," you continue.

"fine," Gia sighs and drops her hand, "just don't break Sam's heart, okay?" 

"relax, Gia, I promise I can keep it in my pants," you crack a smile as she chuckles, and soon enough you're both laughing out loud. Jamie is attractive, sure, but his whatever he was wearing today took away some of his points. an orange top with a black puffer bodywarmer, paired with a cap with 'ICON' written across it? please.

the red corner building comes into view as your laughter dies down, and the warm light from inside illuminates the footpath. faint music and chatter hum through an open window, and suddenly your chest feels warm before you've even entered the restaurant. the reason you're here tonight is your team, and your win, and you. tonight is a celebration of your team's win, and it's a chance for you and the girls to accept praise and compliments galore. contextualising the reason you're here makes you comfortable in the fact that this isn't work, this isn't football, and there's no pressure on you whilst you're here. pushing open the door and moving past the curtain in front of it, the air isn't heavy, instead it's warm and full of admiration. 

the bell above the door dings as you enter, attracting the attention of the people closest to the entrance. when their eyes fall on you and Gia, they smile, clap, and even cheer. a blush appears across your cheeks instantly, but you're able to play it off as you hide your face in your teammates' shoulders when they hug you. you laugh with them, the stress you were putting on yourself quickly dissipating with every kind smile someone gives you. you move further into the restaurant, waving at Roy and your coaches. you move over to Keeley, Rebecca, and Barbara as you say hi to each of them with a kiss on the cheek; "very European," Keeley comments. with a laugh, you walk to the back of the room, eager for a celebratory drink. 

"just a gin and tonic please," you say to the waiter with a smile. leaning an elbow on the bar, you turn to the side, facing the kitchen. between the shelves, you spot Sam talking to one of his employees. you smile as you watch him, now noticing how smart he looks in his dark purple shirt. feeling your eyes on him, he turns to face you, a wide grin growing on his face at the sight of you. interrupting his own conversation, he appears from the kitchen, folding his hands together as he approaches you.

"y/n! long time, no see!" he jokes, and you share a laugh. you thank the waitress as she places your drink on the bar, and Sam's grin softens to a content smile. 

"I like your shirt," you say.

"oh, thank you! I wore it to match your kit." his statement is simple, but feels big. the effort doesn't go unnoticed by you as your lips part slightly, looking at him through your lashes as he nervously rubs the back of his neck. "you pay very good attention," you note, patting a hand on his chest, instantly feeling how hard it is. it's too late to hide your surprised expression at the feeling of his taut muscles, and you look at Sam with slight panic in your eyes at your reaction. to save you the embarrassment, he throws his head back with a cackle; "did you forget I'm also a footballer, y/n?"

you shake your head and laugh along with him; "whatever, let's go grab a seat."

Sam nods at you, still chuckling to himself when you start walking towards Isaac and Gia at a table towards the far-side of the restaurant. with Sam following behind you, you wave at a few more of your teammates as you pass them. Gia smiles brightly as you approach, as she raises her eyebrows suggestively, you widen your eyes at her with a shy expression, silently telling her to shut up. you sit down next to her and Sam beside Isaac across from you. as you're taking a nervous sip of your drink, you feel a hand tap your thigh, glancing at Gia with a knowing smile before pushing her hand away. chuckling to yourself, you place an elbow on the table and rest your chin in your palm. 

"did you enjoy the match, Isaac?" you ask, making sure you bare your sweetest smile, knowing Sam is watching you.

"of course, bruv. it's great watching you two do your thing on the pitch. I'm just glad I got to bring the lads to this one," slapping a hand to Sam's shoulder, he shakes him a bit. Sam laughs, and your eyes find his again. as outgoing as he is, when he looks at you, he goes so shy and nervous. it's endearing, but it feels like something is missing between you. there's a few butterflies, but there's no tension, no chase. if you're going to dive back into the dating pool after your shitty ex, you want something exciting and electric to start with. maybe Sam can still surprise you, it's still early in your night together. 

"y/n, I was just telling Isaac about that one bitchy player who tackled you during the game. she was so nice to us before!" Gia starts, and then the conversation takes off. the combination of alcohol and Sam's kind smile warms your chest, and you finally start to relax into the space as the chat flows between the four of you. the restaurant is cozy, dim lighting hiding the permanent blush on your cheeks, and when glancing over at Sam every now and then, you realise just how attractive he is. when his smile is replaced by a listening look, his other features catch your eye. his dark eyes are so focused on Gia as she speaks, respect pouring out of them as he hangs on to her every which word. despite his almost constant smiling, he doesn't have a smile line or wrinkle set in his perfect skin. his cheeks look soft, not too chiseled or sharp, and you imagine placing a soft kiss on them when he drops you off at your door after a hypothetical date. letting your eyes drop to his lips, you notice the hint of pink between them, and continue your daydream to imagine kissing his soft lips after this made-up date. 

your thoughts are interrupted when his lips open to a big smile again as he laughs at something Isaac says, and you quickly smile and chuckle, hoping you weren't caught staring. glancing around nervously, you look out the window to the street, before looking around the restaurant. you recognise basically everyone, but haven't spoken to many of the other Richmond players yet. as much as you're enjoying getting to know Sam, you're intrigued by some of the other men's team members. you look towards the busier side of the restaurant, watching as the Richmond guys all laugh and talk to each other, clearly having a bond worth many years of playing together. during the training rounds for your team, you idolised these men, trying to find out what exactly Richmond was looking for. you studied their matches and plays, and had to try very hard not to freak out when you first met Roy Kent. spotting him sitting at a round table behind Isaac, you notice him speaking to someone next to him. when you look at who that is, your eyes meet Jamie Tartt's. 

despite Roy clearly speaking to him, Jamie's focused on you. you want to tear your eyes away, but something keeps them locked on his. he's slumped back in his chair, one hand on the table and the other resting on his thigh. you drag your eyes down his frame; he's still wearing that stupid orange outfit, but you can now make out the deep line across his bicep beneath the tight fabric of his shirt. when your eyes drop down to where his hand rests on his leg, you notice how his jeans hug his bulging thighs. lips parted, you blink yourself back to the conversation going on at your table, quickly looking away from Jamie and clearing your throat subtly. you adjust in your seat, flattening nonexistent creases in your blouse before going to take another sip of your drink, only to realise your glass is completely empty.

"be right back," you whisper to Sam, careful not to interrupt Gia's story as you stand up from your seat. brushing past Sam, you touch your hand to his shoulder. he smiles up at you and when you walk away, you make sure your hips sway that little bit more than usual, hoping he's watching. you beeline for the bar, not stopping to speak to anybody as you pass them, despite the many smiles and waves from friends and familiar faces. placing your glass on the bar, you wait for the waitress to appear. instinctively, you pull your phone from your pocket, checking its notifications. 

"well done today," someone speaks next to you.

"thank you-" you begin, looking up from your phone and slowing your sentence halfway. the Jamie Tartt leans forward on the bar, resting on his elbows as he looks you directly in the eye. the small smile that had appeared at the compliment immediately drops, and you blink slowly as you process his sudden presence. 

"should I be worried about my reputation as Richmond's best striker?"

"what?" you furrow your eyebrows at him, immediately hearing his mocking tone. 

"as much as I love the whole girl-power thing you've got goin' on, I hope it don't fuck with my status." 

you gawk at him, jaw slack at his obnoxious statement; "what the fuck are you talking about?"

"I mean-" 

"what can I get you two?" the waitress returns to the bar. interrupting Jamie.

"I'll have another gin and tonic, please, and you can be generous with the gin." you say, smiling sweetly. when she turns to Jamie, he shakes his head silently, before standing up straight and facing you. 

"I mean..." he tries again, "if the press start calling you Richmond's star striker, I'm gonna have to have a serious chat with coach Kent," 

it's impossible to wipe the unimpressed look off your face, staring at him with raised eyebrows and a grimace. you can't believe what he just said to you, and his behaviour is seriously unexpected. sure, you'd seen his cocky press junkets and shitty attitude in the media a year or two ago, but you were under the impression he'd changed since then. you'd spent the last few months studying his football, his plays and techniques burnt into your brain from how often you'd watched his highlights on repeat. the mixed messages confuse you, and your urge to bond with players you admired so much suddenly vanishes. 

"never meet your heroes, I guess," you mutter to yourself, taking a sip of your drink as you move to return to Sam. 

"Tartt," a deep voice huffs, and suddenly a wall of black appears in front of you, stopping you from leaving. tilting your head up, you see Roy, chest puffed and arms crossed as he stares at Jamie.

"ah, speak of the devil," Jamie says with a fake smile. rolling your eyes at him, you want nothing but to go back to the lovely man waiting for you at your table. instead, Roy puts his hand on your shoulder and guides you back in front of Jamie. 

"were you bothering my striker, Tartt?" Roy grumbles, keeping his hand on you. Jamie huffs before pouting, throwing in an eye roll to piss you off just that little bit more. you feel like a child on the playground, your teacher making you stand in front of the mean girl as he waits for you to make up. 

"you're striker?" Jamie spits, "I was here first, ya'know." his belittling tone makes your drink taste the bad kind of sour, and all you can do is sigh, waiting for the moment Roy dismisses you and you can go back to Sam. 

"it's not about who was here first, it's about who's more respectful, and that will never be you." Roy states, confidently putting Jamie in his place. he holds his fist up towards you, and you bump your knuckles with his before pushing past him, finally walking back to your seat.

"what the fuck, Roy-" you hear Jamie start to sputter at him, but you quickly tune it out when your eyes fall on Sam's again. with your eyebrows still raised in shock, you slide back into your seat. 

"are you alright, y/n?" Sam asks, concern painting over his face when you don't return his smile. 

"what's that about?" Gia says as she stares at Roy and Jamie bickering by the bar.

with a deep sigh, you shake your head; "fuck knows... has Jamie always been such a dick?" you ask the table. Sam nods at the same time as Isaac shakes his head, and you and Gia look at each other completely confused. 

"nah bruv, he's gotten so much better," Isaac says to Sam before chugging some of his beer.

"eh, I don't know about that," Sam replies as he raises his eyebrows, "he's learnt how to play as a team, but outside of football he still doesn't talk much."

"he's different with Isaac, though, right?" Gia asks, her boyfriend blinking at her a few times before turning to you. "he's a good guy..." he takes a deep breath before continuing, "when he wants to be," Isaac smacks Sam on the back, laughing loudly. Sam glances up at you with a shy grin, but your face screams unimpressed at the joking about his shitty behaviour. 

the night continues smoothly, with no more Jamie staining your celebrations. after your conversation at the bar, Roy kept him well away from you. you get to know Sam some more, before chatting with your teammates and meeting some of the men's team. Roy even apologises for Jamie's behaviour, but you shrug it off; "footballers, innit," you say, and Roy laughs and nods in agreement. your whole interaction with Jamie was so confusing, and completely unexpected. you'd hoped him being a dick on the pitch didn't translate to outside of the stadium, and to others it didn't, but he didn't seem to hold back when it came to you. the restaurant starts clearing out around 10pm, people needing their rest after the big match. you and Gia wait around until you're the last ones there, and your nerves suddenly set in as you realise there may be some implications between you and Sam. 

"Isaac's coming home with me, by the way," Gia says, locking her arm with Isaac's. she looks at you with her eyes widened, jaw clenched as she darts her eyes towards Sam. you sigh and drop your lids for effect; "Sam, this was amazing, and thank you so much for hosting the team. I would stay for another drink with you but," you force a yawn as you wave your hand in front of your face, "I'm just so exhausted after the game, you know how it is..." 

"ah, okay," Sam starts, rubbing his palms together as his disappointment gets concealed under a kind smile, "get your rest, y/n- and you too, Gia, of course." 

when you're finally back in Gia's car -- squished into the backseat with Isaac in front of you in the passenger seat -- she refuses to start the car. 

"what do you mean you're tired?!" she yells at you, the small car making the noise ten times louder. you smack her arm; "shut up! what's your problem?!" you shout back.

"I think he wanted to get to know you a bit more..." Isaac urges.

"ugh! I have nothing more to say! we've basically gotten to know everything about each other already," you complain, and Gia looks at you with one eyebrow raised. "you're so annoying. why don't you ever let me wingman you?" she finally turns the key in the ignition, pulling out of her parking spot and starting down the road. 

"just leave me alone," you mutter, fishing your headphones out of your gym bag and putting them over your ears. like a grumpy teenager, you play your music loud to shut out the sound of Gia and Isaac talking, leaning on the window beside you as you look out at the passing cars. your mind can't help but drift to Jamie again, still upset by his mean tone towards you. according to Isaac, he's apparently 'gotten better', whatever that's supposed to mean. because to you, he just seems like the same old egotistical prick like when he first came to Richmond on loan from Man City. even when he played in blue you respected him as a footballer, and were actually quite excited to see him come to help an underdog team. 

when Gia finally turns into your road, the recognisable row of houses coming into your view, you pull your headphones off. "I don't think that's a good idea," Gia sighs, but Isaac protests; "no, I swear, I think it'll work." 

"what will work?" you ask, unclicking your seatbelt and leaning between the two of them as Gia pulls into your driveway.

"jesus, y/n, you're gonna give me a heart attack," Isaac groans, holding a hand to his chest. 

they ignore your question, and you let it go, eager to get inside to your big warm bed. the second the car stops, you jump out, speeding to your front door. you unlock it, slipping inside and quickly taking off your shoes at the doormat. almost slipping on the hardwood floors, you run to the stairs, sprinting up to the next floor and straight into your big bedroom. luckily enough, your house has one bedroom downstairs and another upstairs, both with bathrooms on each floor, allowing you to have your own space. you wouldn't mind sharing with Gia, and you actually both slept downstairs for the first week of you living here. you would never admit it to anyone else, but you were a bit scared of how high the ceilings of the upstairs bedroom reached, especially considering the attic above it to which you didn't have any access. 

you close the door and press your back into it, tipping your head back and sighing, eyes closed. dropping your bag at your feet, you dig your phone out of your pocket, seeing texts in your family group chat congratulating you on your win. you thank them in reply before getting ready for bed. finally nestled in the duvet, you scroll through your phone, mindlessly switching between tiktok and instagram as you only half-absorb everything you see. that is, until a press junket with Roy, Jamie, and Sam, pops up on your for you page. Sam's smiling face makes your cheeks warm, his smile absolutely contagious. Jamie, however, looks fucking miserable. 

Roy is between them, calling on interviewers. "Jamie, on the heels of making your England debut, how does it feel to be named Premiere League Player of the Month?" one of them asks him off-camera. the Jamie you spoke to today would have been absolutely gassed by that question, but the Jamie on your screen doesn't seem as thrilled. Roy rolls his eyes, obviously expecting him to be a prick about the question, but instead, he gives a half-assed shrug. "uh-, ehm, yeah, yeah, it feels good, I guess. but it's really the team making me look good. so, I should be doing a better job of making them look good, really." your expression matches that of Roy and Sam on your screen, the shock evident on your face as you sit up in bed. he goes on to object his award, despite how much the other two big him up. 

the timid look on his face breaks your heart a little bit, and seeing the way his eyes seem to glaze over when he's not speaking makes you question whether he's the same man you met today. is this what Sam and Isaac were talking about? switching apps, you type his name into instagram, quickly finding his verified account. you scroll through his pictures, seeing mostly promo pictures for Richmond, or random brand deals he's done. there's nothing personal about his page, and his cocky pout in all of his pictures gives you the ick immediately. any vulnerability he had in that interview completely slips your mind as you sigh deeply, locking your phone and placing it next to your bed. you lay down again, closing your eyes and breathing deep, and right before you drift off, those dark blue eyes challenging you at the bar are the last thing you see before slipping into sleep.

you, Gia, and Isaac all pile into her car on monday morning, heading to Richmond for another day of training. "just to give you a heads up, y/n," Gia says as she starts the car, "we're trying something different at training today." you perk up, leaning forward to feel less like a third wheel between the couple. 

"oooh, what are you planning for us captain?"

"over the weekend, Isaac and I were discussing maybe combining our morning trainings with the guys? just to spice things up a little, you know?"

"yeah, because it's the middle of the season and everything, Gia and I thought we could use a little switch up just to make things more fun." Isaac adds.

"oh yeah! that's a great idea," you say, genuine excitement in your voice. Isaac stares at you with a furrowed brow, trying to sense any sarcasm in your tone, and Gia's silence proves she's thinking the same thing. "whatever you do, don't make me train with Tartt. if you can promise me that, then I'll try to have fun." your emphasis on the last word is only half-mocking -- you really do want to try to make football fun for you again. 

"y/n..." Gia trails off before taking a deep breath, "it's gonna be quite hard to train you both as strikers if you don't train together..."

"that's not true!" you protest, shaking your head with a confused face, "just make me striker for one half of the training team, and make him striker for the other, that way we won't have to interact." 

"right, until you play a game against each other," Isaac adds, "what then?" 

"then I'll just have to fucking destroy him." you huff, leaning back in your seat and peering out the window. maybe kicking Jamie's ass in training is what will make all of it a lot more fun. the grumpy expression on your face contradicts your thoughts, the image of an anxious Jamie replaying in your head. you can't seem to get his big, sad eyes out of your mind, his eyebrows knitted together in worry and discomfort. Roy and Sam seemed equally as surprised in the moment as you were watching the reupload last night, and seeing that different side of him makes you think that maybe today he'll be different than at your match on saturday. maybe he was just having a bad day.

"good mornin' dickhead. ready to get your arse kicked?" Jamie's smug face winks at you as you meet him in the hallway on your way to the training pitch. "hi Jamie," you respond with a flat, unamused tone; he wasn't just having a bad day then. both dressed in different colour training kits, the men's and women's team flood onto the grass, crowding in front of the coaches as they await an explanation for their joint training. Gia and Isaac step out of the large group of players and stand in front of them, ready to give their announcement. 

"so, here's the plan." Isaac's booming voice quiets the chattering players. you're already listening, of course, refusing to talk to Jamie who is still standing next to you. "psst," he leans closer to you, and you reflexively lean the other way, "do you think they're gonna make us tie a string from our dicks to your tits and make us play." with a disgusted grimace on your face, you side-eye him, catching a glimpse of his cocky grin. you roll your eyes, redirecting your attention to your captain. 

"Isaac and I have decided that we're all going to train together this morning, and in the afternoon, we split off again." Gia announces.

"the point of today is to get you guys to have fun with football. just for this morning, you can all forget about the upcoming men's match this friday, and the girls can recover after their amazing win last saturday!" the group all clap and cheer at Isaac's words, both in excitement for the next match, as well as in celebration of the last match. clapping and smiling along with the group, you nudge your shoulder to one of your teammate's next to you, temporarily forgetting about the annoying presence beside you. 

once everyone calms down again, Gia continues the pair's speech; "we're gonna start by having you all group up with everyone who plays your position. wingers with wingers, strikers with strikers, defenders with defenders, that kinda thing,"

your mouth drops, and you gawk at Gia who tries desperately to avoid your gaze, but eventually gives in. "I'm sorry," she mouths with a shrug, and your shocked expression turns into a bored one as you turn to face Jamie. with a smug smile on his face, he runs his tongue along the inside of his cheek as you both cross your arms across your chest. 

"you've got to be fucking kidding me," you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose as you try to calm yourself with a few deep breaths. when you look up again, Jamie is staring down at his feet, digging his studs into the grass. rolling your eyes, you turn to face Gia and Isaac again. everyone has grouped up, and you and Jamie seem to be the only pair. your brows furrow as you look around; "is there not even a second teamer than can join us? please, Gia," 

"nope," she pops her lips together as she says it, "you two are they only strikers." her voice is stern, and you narrow your eyes at her with a curt nod. "right..." you drawl as you stare at her, challenging her. her simple smile is unwavering, and she's clearly not giving this up. she cocks her head towards Jamie, who is still distracted by his own boots. sighing loudly, you untangle your arms to slap a hand to his, feeling his hard muscles through his long sleeve. the feeling surprises you, and you let yourself glance at his biceps, the taut fabric stretching over them. keeping the disgusted look on your face, you hope he doesn't notice you checking him out. when you lift your eyes, however, he's looking you straight in the eye. you jump at the sudden eye contact, frowning at his forwardness. 

"is there something on my arm?" he asks you, not taking his eyes off yours.

"no," you snap, and you hope the blush creeping up your cheeks is just because of the cold autumn air. 

"are you blushing?" 

"no, fuck off," you mutter, slapping his arm again as you turn your attention away from him. Gia and Isaac take turns explaining how today's training is organised, assigning different coaches to different groups. thankfully, Isaac gives Roy the responsibility of making sure you don't murder Jamie during your session. "alright, let's go!" Isaac shouts, Beard blowing his whistle. you stay rooted in place, trying your hardest to find it in you to actually go interact with Jamie. him and Roy are already making their way to the goal to the left of the pitch, footballs in hand. 

"good luck, y/n." Sam's voice appears, alongside a hand on your shoulder. you place your hand on his, smiling up at him meekly. "thank you, Sam... have fun!" his smile is warm and sympathetic, and you kind of appreciate the pity, it's more than Gia gave you. Sam's words give you the courage to finally move, slowly falling into a jog as you head towards the far side of the pitch. if the whole point of today was to have fun, why the fuck would they lump you and Jamie together with Roy as your peacekeeper?

"alright you two..." Roy says as you approach. you stand next to Jamie, leaving an obnoxious amount of distance between the two of you. Roy tosses you a bright orange football before continuing; "I've been told you need to be friends. I wouldn't have a fucking clue why since you're not even on the same team, but whatever. we're gonna keep it simple, you each take turns kicking the ball against the goalpost, whenever one of you fucks up and kicks it into the goal, you both get down and do fifteen push-ups. understood?" 

"so scoring a goal is bad? what is that supposed to teach us?" you ask.

"and if she fucks it, which she probably will, I have to do push-ups?" Jamie groans.

"yes." Roy says, a simple answer to two apparently-simple questions. 

"jesus christ," you and Jamie both mutter at the same time, making you both look at each other and roll your eyes, also at the exact same time.

you move toward the penalty spot to go first, ignoring how in sync you two seem to be, and the ball firmly at your feet. you push down you right sock before pulling the left as high up your leg as possible. taking a few steps back, you blow out a sharp breath before charging forward and kicking the ball, perfectly hitting the middle of the top goal post. Roy claps with a small smile on his face, and you look at him proudly. without a word, Jamie bumps into you as he places his ball down, quickly taking a shot, the ball smacking in exactly the same spot as yours had. you both jog to collect your footballs, and you decide to up the stakes. aiming for the top goal post again, you now kick the ball so it curves up high into the air before slowly dropping and bouncing off the right spot. Jamie wastes no time to copy you, even turning his back to the goal in a cocky manner, knowing he aimed it perfectly. he holds his hands up in the air as he slowly spins around, proud smile on his face. you roll your eyes for the umpteenth time, turning your head away from him to hide the way the corners of your mouth lift slightly at his bragging. pressing a hand into his chest, you push him out of the way for you to take your next kick, and you finally let the smile through. 

with a loud laugh, Jamie claps and whoops, pushing his fists into the air; "I did it! I made it laugh!" 

"it?!" you shout back, obviously offended.

"go on then, try something harder." he cocks his head towards the goal, biting down on his bottom lip as he grins at you. you run towards the ball and thrust your hip forward with as much might as you can muster, swinging your leg. the ball shoots at the goal, knocking off the top one before bouncing against the left post. "ha!" you shout as you turn to Jamie, pointing a finger at him, "watch out Tartt, I might be coming for your reputation," you mock his words from saturday evening, and he struggles to wipe the shock from his face. his lips are pouted with is eyebrows raised, head tipped forward as he looks between the ball, to the goal post, back to you. his jaw clenches, and you can see his sharp jawline jutting out before his adam's apple bobs up and down with a gulp. although it's mid-october, the skin of his neck is still sun kissed from summer, and you let your eyes drift down to the collar of his navy training top. even through the fabric, the muscles in his shoulders are defined, and the lines on his biceps are still showing without him needing to flex.

"what?" his voice snaps you out of your daze, dragging you back to the cold pitch. your cheeks feel hot again, and you do your best to look pissed off at him; "what?" you snarl back.

"you're staring at me." 

"no I'm not," you mutter, turning away from him and abruptly jogging toward the side of the pitch. as you run away from Jamie, you squeeze your eyes shut, cringing at yourself. what possessed you to just run away? grabbing your water bottle, you chug as much as you can in one go, taking a few deep breaths. "come on, y/n... focus," you mumble to yourself before walking back to the goal as casually as possible. 

neither Roy nor Jamie bring up your little trance, and you count yourself lucky since it would be pretty good ammo for Jamie to annoy you with. the two of you continue your competition, the smack of the ball against the goal becoming almost rhythmic as you don't waste any time to outdo each other with each turn. Jamie even takes it to the next level, moving to the middle between the penalty and the halfway line. from there, he attempts to hit to goal post, and you hold your breath as you watch the ball soar through the air. Jamie locks his hands behind his head, and you have to tear your eyes away from his arms yet again. the ball skims past the top post, missing it by mere centimetres, and you flinch as Jamie screams at the top of his lungs. you stare at him with wide eyes as he falls to his knees, keeping his hands behind his head as he plants his forehead into the grass. he groans and whines to himself dramatically, and you look to Roy. when you see him look equally as confused as you are, you find your feet carrying yourself towards a floored Jamie. 

"Jamie?" you ask with a soft voice, reaching a finger out and poking him in the back, "you okay?" 

"did I lose?" he asks, voice high pitched and cracking.

"Jamie, what the fuck? get up!" your tone is no longer gentle as you poke him harder and tapping your foot to his ass. he lets himself topple over, lying on the ground in fetal position, faking loud racking sobs. looking around you, you notice a few other footballers staring at you two, clearly concerned and confused. you crouch down, looking at him with your mouth drawn in a tight line, rubbing your hand over his arm. 

"Jamie, baby, should I get the medic?" you pout as you coo at him condescendingly, and the petname snaps him out of his dramatics. his face morphs from a cry to a disgusted look as he stares at you. you tilt your head to the side; "if you do these push-ups with me I'll let your mistake pass as a bit of fun." 

he jumps up almost immediately, jogging towards Roy before you can even stand up straight. getting down on his knees, he looks up at your coach and asks; "fifteen? why not twenty?" 

"fine." Roy grumbles and you look at him with a defeated look. "are you serious?" he shrugs at you as you whine, getting down on all fours in front of Jamie.

he smirks down at you, chuckling to himself as he contemplates his words for a few seconds; "you know, y/n, whenever I've imagined you in this position I'm usually behind you." 

his words knock the wind out of you, and you cough a few times as you sit up on your knees. you slap your hand on your chest as you clear your throat, completely shocked by the nerve of Jamie Tartt. throwing his head back, he laughs at your reaction, hand clutching his stomach as he struggles for air. Roy doesn't say a word, doesn't even laugh, just looks around waiting for you two to stop your antics. as Jamie recovers from his laughing fit, and you finally stop coughing, he keeps his eyes on you as he drops forward, planting his hands in the grass. "you know I'm just joking, yeah?" his words may be kind, but the brazen smirk on his face says otherwise. with a wink, he runs his tongue along his bottom lip before dropping his eyes to your lips briefly. your mouth opens slightly, his behaviour giving you absolute whiplash. he's teasing you, winding you up, but also flirting? you give your head a shake before putting your hands down again, keeping your eyes glued to the ground as you try to hide the blush inevitably making its way up your face. 

"okay, stop fucking around," Roy interrupts the flustered silence, watching as you and Jamie push up onto your feet, holding your body weight with your arms. he starts counting out loud, going painfully slow so you have to continue holding yourself up as you wait for him to say the next number. still facing the ground, you huff breaths out through your mouth, still persevering. glancing at Jamie, you look up through your eyelashes to see his strong arms flexing as he pumps up and down. his fingers clench, digging into the ground as he brings his chest all the way down, brushing the blades of grass without letting go of the push-up. the lines in his arms are impossibly deeper now, and you can see his shoulders bulging through his top. your jaw slack, you drag your eyes up to his neck, seeing the muscles strain in its sides. 

"y/n!" Roy shouts, making you jump and sag through your elbows a little before picking your weight back up. your head snaps up to look at Jamie, who's staring at you with an amused grin, eyes dark with his pupils blown wide; "you missed a count, love," he drawls, "too busy starin'?"

embarrassment takes over as you roll your lips and put your head down, arms starting to shake as your holding plank becomes almost unbearable. you just got caught staring at Jamie's muscles, again, by both him and Roy. all you want is to run inside, lock yourself in the bathroom, and never show your face. instead, you mumble a "sorry" and continue your push-ups in front of Jamie. as Roy starts counting again, you screw your eyes shut, swearing not to let them drift across Jamie's body ever again. you squeeze your eyes so hard you start seeing red specks float across your vision. Roy gets to eighteen, and your ears throb as your blood pumps quickly. your arms shiver under your weight as he counts excruciatingly slowly. but on number nineteen, your body suddenly tenses, feeling warmth on your right hand. you allow one eye to open, squinting down at your hand, only to see Jamie's fingers laying between yours.

———

NEW SERIES!! thank you so much for all the love on my last series! if you haven't read it yet, please check it out if you'd like to!

sorry for the big build up with Sam and everything, but I had to give you a reason to hate Jamie, didn't I? I'm really excited to write this, I'm all for longwinded tension ;p

[blue-bujo]

Bowled Over (Roy Kent x Reader): Chapter Four

You work at a bowling alley and a young girl named Phoebe has a birthday party there. You catch her uncle's eye.

Roy Kent x female reader

Will try to update roughly every two weeks

Chapter Four: Feelings

(2.1k words)

Warnings: Roy Kent-level language (you know what you're in for), discussion of mental health (anxious/insecure thoughts)

Summary: You start to realize that maybe you’ve caught feelings when you can’t stop thinking about Coach Kent.

After the chaotic visit from AFC Richmond, you thankfully had a day off. You stayed in, not leaving your modest little apartment – no, flat, they were called flats here. You stayed in, not leaving your modest little flat and found yourself thinking again about Roy Kent.

How you had managed to touch his hands twice, you would never understand. Only you could be that awkward. But he could have handled it better. Running away like that didn’t fit his dark, moody persona. Even you knew that Roy Kent’s main dynamic when he’d played had been that of unbridled rage.

You randomly flipped your TV to Sky Sports for some background noise while you did a few chores. AFC Richmond was a fan favorite, so coverage often turned to them. In most clips, you could see Coach Kent shouting in the background. He was passionate, you had to give him that. It was interesting…

The comments that the little girl, Phoebe, and Jamie Tartt had made wouldn’t leave your mind. There was no way you could be considered even remotely fit, right? You were a bowler, for crying out loud!

But if there was attraction, it might explain the bizarre reactions. And the fact that he’d come back, yet hesitated to come inside. And the small talk before he left yesterday… Could he be attracted to you?

No. No way.

Something you hadn’t experienced in a long time was bubbling up to your chest. Butterflies. The joy of finally being wanted again. And by a footballer! If it was true, you’d never doubt anything again.

Reality soon crashed back down on you. You were a naturalized citizen working a low-paying job at a bowling alley. He was a high-profile figure with two decades in the sports world. Believing that he fancied you was a sweet daydream, but nothing more. A morning spent googling had shown you what his past experience with women was, and it was nothing like you.

Still, he had come back.

If he came back again, you’d consider the possibility that Roy Kent was interested in you.

The greyhounds were wrapping up another training, and their spirits were sufficiently recovered following their loss at Brighton. Montlaur was back off of the DL, but O’Brian was in for Zoreaux at goal until his sprained wrist healed. With their formation changed, Roy and Nate had been drilling them endlessly. Roy had let Nate lead; he didn’t want to overwhelm O’Brian, who hadn’t had so many minutes in goal for years. His mind was otherwise engaged, anyway.

After the bowling day, Roy Kent had given up on forgetting about Splits and given control to Just Roy. That Roy had been trying to come up with an excuse to go back, but everything seemed too desperate. Which he was, desperate for connection, but he didn’t want it to be so fucking obvious.

Today, though, as he saw one of the boys snapping a selfie halfway through training, inspiration struck. When he had first visited the bowling alley for Phoebe’s birthday, Splits had had to take the photo for the wall. She had been so busy when the whole team had been there that no picture had been taken.

Except Higgins had taken one to send to Ted in America.

Roy almost smiled, but caught himself. If he got the picture from Higgins, he could go back under the pretense of giving it to Splits. He’d wait until training was over, and then pay Higgins a visit. It was a perfect scheme. Fucking perfect.

Higgins, of course, obliged. Roy now had the excuse he needed. Tonight, he would go see Splits.

Two days after the chaotic visit from AFC Richmond, you had another shift at the bowling alley. Lettie, the owner and a woman you adored like a grandmother, was waiting so eagerly for you to clock in that you knew she had gossip, but you hadn’t guessed what it could be when she told you.

“There was somebody here to see you last night!” she practically buzzed. “You didn’t tell me you had a man these days!”

“I didn’t know I had one,” you answered, confused. “Who was he?”

“He said his name, but he sort of mumbled it, so I couldn’t properly hear him. But he specifically asked after you, and he seemed a bit disappointed when I told him you weren’t scheduled. I told him you’d be back today, and he perked up. At least, I think he did; he was so intense!”

You knew you had to interrupt Lettie or she would ramble forever. “What did he look like?”

“Oh, he was a handsome lad, but maybe a bit older? Dark and brooding, but shy; he hid in his eyebrows the whole time he was here. But that body! Built like an athlete, he was!”

“Lettie, stop, you’re married! What would Cecil say?” You laughed, but only partly at the older woman. Partly, it was nervous laughter. It sounded like she was describing Roy Kent. He had come back, and been disappointed when you weren’t there! The butterflies flared to life in your stomach.

“Did he say he was coming back today?” you asked, hoping you sounded casual.

“Well, he didn’t say it in so many words, but he nodded, and like I said, he did seem to perk up when I told him you were on today. I’ll be sure to be in the back when he shows up, so you can flirt with him properly.”

You couldn’t hide the blush that was rushing to your cheeks. Lettie was too much; she was always overly invested in everybody’s dating lives, and she’d be the first to admit it. She reached over and patted your shoulder encouragingly before she left with one word of advice.

“Let him pursue you, dearie. Nothing makes a lonely girl feel more valued than being pursued by a man.”

“Thanks, Lettie.”

You had a lot of time before the normal weekday crowd came in to ponder Lettie’s words. It was true that you were lonely, painfully so. You didn’t see yourself as desirable or interesting, and you hadn’t for a while. It was hard to see yourself as anything but bland. But when Roy Kent walked up to the front doors of your bowling alley, where would see him hesitating through the tint of the glass, you started to hope.

He seemed to by talking to himself. Maybe pumping himself up to approach you? That seemed to be the case, because when he stopped, he walked purposefully to the door and stepped inside, directly toward your counter.

“Welcome in!” you called as he approached. “What brings you back?” You hoped your tone was normal, despite the way your heart was currently beating in your throat. He was all in black today with an amazing leather jacket, and it was working for him.

He came straight up to you, as close as the counter and the register would allow. You kept your hands firmly planted on that counter, and like last time, his hands were shoved deep into his pockets.

“I wanted to come back and give you a picture for the wall. You seemed fucking busy the other night and didn’t ask for one, but our team’s operations manager took one, and I have it if you want it.” Roy’s words seemed a bit rehearsed, you noticed.

Smiling, you replied, “You didn’t have to do that, Coach Kent.”

That apparently wasn’t the response he had been expecting, because it took him a moment to form his next sentence. “Of course I did. I didn’t want you to get in trouble for something you had no control over. We were a big enough group to be a proper fucking nuisance; this is the least I can do.”

He was holding back. There was a restlessness in the way he was standing, shifting his weight from side to side. It mirrored the way you were feeling. Behind Roy, you could see Lettie watching through her office window, motioning like she was pushing you or Roy forward. You twisted a ring on your right hand – an anxious habit of yours – and took your figurative step forward.

“I really appreciate the thought,” you said, noticing the way he stood a little straighter as he heard you, “and you will be saving me from a lecture later. Can I see the picture?”

Roy took his phone out of his back pocket and unlocked it for you. It was a different angle than most of the celebrity pictures, shooting across several lane approaches. It layered the team, who were all looking up with impromptu, genuine smiles. It was the best picture you’d seen taken in your bowling alley.

“This is great!” you exclaimed happily. Then, motioning to your manager’s business card by the register, you added, “Can you email it to this address? That way my manager can have the joy of printing it out.”

Roy made a sound that seemed more like the clearing of his throat than one of the grunts you associated with him, and answered slowly. “Not to be too forward, but I was hoping I could text it to you?”

Stunned, you blinked. Had Roy Kent just asked you for your phone number? You heard yourself stammering like an idiot as you told him he could. Roy opened a new contact and held out his phone for you, which you took and tapped in your name and number before handing it back to him. He texted you the photo, and you added his contact to your phone. Then the two of you looked at each other.

The man in front of you was the first to break the silence; you were following Lettie’s advice and letting him do the work. He held your gaze with his dark eyes and didn’t break it.

“Look,” he said, “I really came here because I think you’re fucking fit, and I wanted to get your number so I could talk to you. If you’re not interested, just tell me now and I’ll leave you alone and go be a fucking idiot somewhere else. I’ll honor whatever you decide.”

He finished his speech and dropped eye contact to look down at his shoes. Your heart was beating so hard in your throat that you could barely swallow. You looked over his shoulder at Lettie’s office, where the old woman was giving you two thumbs up, and found your voice.

“I’m interested,” you said. “Really interested. Thank you, Coach Kent.”

Roy transformed in front of you. A massive smile stretched hugely across his face, hiding his eyes and dazzling you. He tried to stop it, but he wasn’t able to. He grinned at you uncontrollably.

“Fuck yeah! I’m so glad. But please, no more of this stuffy ‘Coach Kent’ bullshit. Call me Roy.”

“Okay, Roy,” you said, stuck in your own uncontrollable smile.

Lettie was clapping excitedly in the background, and Roy was oblivious. He finally managed to get some of his self-control back, and was smiling with closed lips, his eyes twinkling now that they were visible. You both looked happily at each other.

“Right, are you free in the next night or two?” he asked.

As quickly as you could, you opened the shift schedule on the computer. Roy was leaning on the counter trying to see it. You looked through the week’s calendar and huffed.

“I’m scheduled for the next three afternoon to evening shifts,” you told him. “The first I’m free is four days from now.”

“That’s not fucking ideal, but it’ll do,” the man said gruffly. “It took me almost that long to work out an excuse to come in here and ask you out. I can wait that long. Would you like to go out with me in four days? Just somewhere casual where we can get to know each other?”

You nodded. Roy Kent was asking you out!

He smiled that dazzling smile again. “Cheers! I’ll see you then. Until then, I’ll text you.”

His mission successful, he turned and strode to the doors beaming. Before he exited, he looked once more at you and gave you an awkward little wave, and then he was gone. Lettie immediately rushed out of her office and held you at arm’s length, studying you closely.

“Well?” she demanded.

“I have a date with Roy this week!” you squealed. Then you both hugged each other tightly and jumped up and down in celebration.

Tag list: @preciousbabypeter @harry-bowie-mercury @amieinghigh