#admittedly i'm a VERY picky reader but the fact that so many fic that get rec'd can't clear that low bar is frustrating

[mybrainproblems]

Yeah, you're right!!! It most def is a more recent thing. I literally cannot read anything where dean is THAT repressed, it's physically painful

Like! Normally I'm a voracious reader of fic when I first get into a ship but with destiel I basically gave up after reading some of the more "modern" stuff on rec lists bc I felt so dissatisfied and unfulfilled. Based on the fraction of a fraction of fic I've read it seems to have really taken off during 2020 slash when s15 started airing but especially post-15x18??

Which I find baffling since we have from the vessel himself that Dean doesn't think angels are capable of love the way that humans are. Which means he's thought about it! And! This is actually said within the show with Dean's line about how trying to care just "breaks" angels because "they don't have the equipment" to care the way humans do.

Dean is not repressed but he does repress his desires. It's a minor linguistic difference that adds up to a massive emotional and psychological difference. And it's in the text babey.

I was going to toss this in the tags bc I think this might come across a bit dickish but fuck it: I think a lot of the recent "Dean is repressed" crap comes from the confession and Dean's perceived lack of reaction that the larger internet community clowned on. Which is kind of funny when you think about it bc if you're in the fandom you know it's all about the microexpressions and jacting joices? And it's obvious that the scene was chopped to hell and we were TOLD THAT by both Speight and Jensen! I'm not trying to be like "only real fans understand!" but I do think that the larger reaction by the internet to the confession and Jensen's really understated performance did impact destiel writers' characterization of Dean in fic written post-confession.

(And for the record, I had not seen anything besides gifs on Tumblr and watched the confession scene on 5 Nov and was blown away by Jensen's acting in that scene, awkwardly edited as it is. It absolutely did not read as a lack of or negative reaction, but then again I am terminally and painfully deancoded.)

I could literally go on about this for hours but I'm trying to be low sodium.

[shinidamachu]

I read the InuKag amensia Purity fic, but unfortunately I got turned off by the fact that they made the source of conflict yet again Kikyo/the love triangle even though this was supposed to be post her final passing.

Maybe it’s just due to Sunrise beating a dead horse, but I’m so tired of the love triangle being used as InuKag’s main source of conflict and “obstacle.” There are so many other topics to explore on what they’d need to overcome such as the fact that they’re of two different races and two drastically different eras - is Kagome ready to leave her entire life and family behind for an era that only knows blood & pillage? Is Inuyasha comfortable with Kagome risking it all for him and exposing her to the prejudice of being with and potentially bearing a hanyou’s children? What about her safety? She’d be much safer in her own era wouldn’t she?

These are the things I wish a 3 year separation angst Kagome getting amnesia fic would explore, except I get the love triangle as InuKag’s main obstacle… again! (no offense to the author of said fic)

Well, I don't think I have read Purity yet, but I know for a fact not every trope will be everybody's cup of tea. Love triangles in general seem to be especially controversial among audiences and that's okay.

Personally, I don't mind Kikyo drama as long as it's well written and in character, because as you guys probably have noticed by now, I'm very opinionated about the love triangle and it makes me rather picky when it comes to fanfiction.

I totally understand being over it, though. Sunrise — and Takahashi herself, although admittedly in a smaller proportion — really did beat a dead horse. I totally agree that Inukag was a very nuanced pairing and, as such, the possibilities for conflict are endless, but never got explored to their full potential. Or at all, in some cases.

The obstacles you mentioned are just the tip of the iceberg. We could keep listing complications all day long, be it sticking with specific canon facts only or creating entirely new generic situations, but many opportunities were wasted to favor the love triangle instead and that's undeniable.

However, I'd also argue that the reason this is such a recurrent fanfic theme is precisely because it left much to be desired in the original story. I, for one, have always thought the execution was frustrating and unsatisfying. Many things were left unsaid, many dimensions of the dynamic between Inuyasha, Kagome and Kikyo were swept under the rug or simply not explored because it wasn't convenient, even though it was absolutely necessary to do so.

This resulted in many misconceptions and misinterpretations within the fandom, not only of the characters involved but also of the story itself, which in turn has fed ship wars for ages. Then again, this was hardly unintentional. And I'm not talking only about the anime here. Sunrise just happened to be more shameless and unscrupulous about the whole thing.

I don't blame readers who avoid this kind of fanfic like the plague, but I also don't blame writers who feel the urge to fill in the gaps and "fix it", because I actually relate to that a lot.

In the specific case you brought up, I don't think that just because Kikyo died, Kagome's insecurities died with her. Some wounds take longer to heal than others. Some wounds seem to be healed until something or someone makes them bleed again. And more often than not, healing is a working progress rather than a linear path you take and then is done with. Falling into old habits, self doubting, self sabotaging, letting your anxieties and insecurities get the best of you even when you think you know better is only human nature. And Kagome is the most human character in Inuyasha.

If Kagome has lost her memories, it makes sense to me that she would need some reassuring every now and then, especially because getting these memories back eventually might very much feel like reliving them all over again, which can definitely be confusing, frustrating and heartbreaking.

Now, since this fanfic didn't do it for you, all I can do is sugest that you keep looking for the ones that will check your boxes. This is a very old fandom. Certainly someone has written a story that aligns with your needs at some point.

If you can't find any, then maybe it's time to create it, because I assure you that, somewhere, someone has the same craving as you. In case you don't feel comfortable writting something yourself, it's always a good idea to team up with someone who does.

Luckily, we've got plenty of talented writers in the fandom, and in my experience they're quite approachable. I'm positive you can find someone willing to beta your writing, work on this story with you as a partner or take your request as a comission.

I wish you the best of luck and ask you to tag me or hit my inbox again if you find or write something like that, because I would love to read it.