#adding mature tag bc oh wow i said breasts ooga booga

[vacantgodling]

exploration / body neutrality

wip: jenna the reaper (book 2 whatever that’ll be called)

characters: jenna magboo & yehna (for clarification due to a long series of events, jenna and yehna are sharing the same body)

explaining the context of this excerpt and how we got here will take too long but tl;dr if you are not comfortable with benign and neutral body exploration relating to what people consider “sexual characteristics” (ie and mainly breasts/boobs/tits) then don’t read.

Jenna stood in front of the mirror. It wasn’t often that she took a good look at herself; it wasn’t something she thought about. She knew what she looked like and had categorized her features like a checklist to easily answer any demographic conversation if it should arise. But, it was wholly unimportant to see them together in her opinion. But now looking, with one green eye watchfully regarding her, Jenna realized that some things had changed since she last looked. 

Her head was still small, shaped like a heart her mother told her. Her eyes, or, eye, was still brown and was still downturned like the natural shape of her mouth. Her lips were still full and round, similar to her nose, which also hadn’t changed. Even her eyebrows, with their thick patches of dark hair that slimmed out near the tips was the same. Her hair, however, braided and tangled— maybe a bit matted—had changed. The blonde, present since she was a child, finally creeping up towards her ears and towards where her eyes rested. She hadn’t realized it’d traveled up this far and, at this pace, she’d be fully blonde by the end of the year. Maybe sooner than that. 

Jenna’s eyes trailed downwards, and up til now, Yehna hadn’t said anything. She never truly heard her Reaper counterpart before she spoke; her mouth would simply start moving on its own without her having a say in the matter of Yehna wanted to speak. She couldn’t communicate to anyone but Carlos how Yehna’s frequent emotive expressions that crossed and twisted her visage were painful; her facial muscles not used to such vigor. Yet Yehna let her have this reign, this quiet moment. 

But that wasn’t why they were here. 

Jenna slowly unzipped her blue downy sweater. She wore it so often it was like a second skin, and she couldn’t remember the last time she’d ever existed outside of it. She let it drop to the floor. Her grey tank top exposed her arms to the room and she felt uncomfortable goosebumps immediately rise on her skin. The cold was prickly and stinging. She wanted to retreat underneath her covers but she didn’t. Yehna still said nothing. 

Carefully, Jenna pulled the tank top over her head, then let both it and her arms fall to her sides. 

She studied her breasts in the mirror curiously. 

The development of her body was also new. Jenna was used to the formlessness that came with her blue sweater. It was never something anyone brought up, neither her moms or Carlos. She knew, intrinsically, how her body would likely form. She felt the curves of Kashmira whenever she was held close to her chest in a hug, yet she knew it was possible to become more lanky and lithe like Adunni. Still, there was a wonderment when she looked at the shape of those in her favorite pinup magazines. Tall women. Short men. Fat women. Skinny men. Curved and uncurved alike. Yet she never gave herself much thought until now. 

Without realizing, she had cupped them between her hands. They fit nicely, and had an unobtrusive weight about them. Goosebumps formed on them easily like her arms, and the pinch and sting of the cold hardened her nipples until the bloomed like little mountains on top of her areola. 

“Soft.” Yehna whispered through her in a rasp. When Jenna glanced up, she saw Yehna’s green eye staring back at her intently. “It feels like skin.” Jenna answered. But it was a fascinating sensation none the less. Between a thumb and forefinger, she felt Yehna roll her left nipple curiously, and while it didn’t hurt it made one of them gasp. Who, she didn’t know. Perhaps both of them.