#actually looking at it more the proportions in general are kinda fucked but I've been running on not a lot of sleep for a while now

[72stars]

takes break from fussing with designs to doodle a tired little Cyclops before bed, good night

[gaogaigoatgrrl]

i hope that in the wake of predstrogen/predesterone's back-to-back deletion we don't forget about the ongoing building wave of seemingly organic transmisogyny from the userbase leading up to it, some of which may or may not have been the result of terf psyops but all of which certainly wouldn't have been possible without the eager participation of a significant proportion of users, including but probably not limited to:

the entire concept of transandrophobia (if this offends you, think long and hard about why you want so badly for it to be real)

the ongoing backlash against the terms tme and tma (if they offend you, think long and hard about why they might have practical value to trans women and people with similar social positionality)

the ongoing trend of trans women's blogs getting flagged on the flimsiest of pretenses and generally receiving far more scrutiny for "adult content" than anyone else's

the seeming unironic revival of "baeddel" as a slur for outspoken trans women, on the basis of a long-dead clique that, ironically enough, self-applied the long-dead (and tbf, etymologically questionable) slur from the middle ages to reclaim it

the entire "trans women should be fucking trans men instead of complaining about transmisogyny" genre of post

the backlash when tgirls finally started calling out the aforementioned bullshit

the copypasted anons sent to several trans women (many of whom were lesbians) sexually harassing them and threatening corrective rape for calling out the aforementioned bullshit

the backlash when tgirls called the aforementioned bullshit sexual harassment

the expansion of flexible queer label use (which to be clear, i am generally all for) to include "afab trans women", muddying the waters and making transmisogyny harder to articulate

the backlash when tgirls started calling out the aforementioned bullshit

the aita incident in which a trans woman described a cis woman claiming to be a trans woman in a group chat and giving other trans women terrible medical advice based on no actual qualifications or experience, and got a huge backlash for warning them about the aforementioned bullshit despite the stakes of, you know, following terrible medical advice

everything from the sixth point onward happened within the past... week? two weeks? my sense of time is a bit fuzzy. who knows what the rest of this week has in store?

people on this website are so incredibly hostile to trans women even being able to name our own oppression, let alone resist it in any concrete way. and i know it's not just this website. don't you get tired of the crab bucket bullshit? holy fucking shit.

like, i've been lucky, i've overwhelmingly managed to dodge it (probably on account of frankly being a pretty boring and inconsistent poster). this time last year, i was actually bored that i didn't have anons in my inbox to argue with. but i've seen it happen to so many other women now, it's absurd. even if it never hits you personally, you can never shake the awareness that it's happening to so many of the cool girls on here, people you like and whose posts you laugh at and who you look up to. they just kinda seem to drop like flies over time. don't you get tired?

[fernsnailz]

hello! i was wondering how long you've been animating for? and what got you into storyboarding & comic making? do you have any tips for comic making (paneling) & animating?

i've been animating since i was a teenager but i didn't start animating consistently until college, so a little over 5 years! but i've been making comics since i was little, so animating and storyboarding just kinda came naturally from that.

my general advice for comics is that it's all about flow and timing! flow is about determining the right pacing for your scene as well as making it readable. usually the panels flow from one into the other - like in the example below (by tracy yardley who is REALLY good at this stuff), the motion of the characters leads into the next panel, and the speech bubbles also line up with where the action of the panel naturally leads.

obligatory archie sonic mention complete

timing is just as important and can be conveyed in a number of different ways in comics. usually with my work, the size of the panel indicates how long i imagine the moment is. so a small panel is a short moment, and a large panel requires a bit more time.

long moments can also be split into multiple shorter moments if you break it up into numerous panels.

paneling itself can be pretty tricky - i tend to break a lot of my pages up into thirds first (at whatever proportion you need), then arrange whatever panels i need within those thirds.

these aren't really rules that are set in stone, just a few things that i've found have helped me. you don't need to fill a whole page with tons of Stuff for a comic - it's all about figuring out how you want your story to flow through the page's space. same with storyboarding, that flow and timing is important in an even more literal sense because storyboards flows through actual time, not just space on a page.

idk if any of this makes much sense so. i also highly highly recommend the Comics Devices Library for other elements and principles you can use lol it's very good 👍

i don't have as many tips for animating since 1) i consider myself to be a comic/storyboard artist first and an animator second, and 2) animating is. very complex lol. if you're new to animating then i suggest starting SMALL and trying out some beginner animation exercises and the 12 Principles of Animation.

if you're already an animator and just looking for general advice then uhh. idk arcs are important. arcs are SO fucking important do not forget that most motions move in some sort of arc. also remember to label your keyframes and looping animations. and put secondary actions and limbs on different layers if you don't want to go crazy. also animate your character's eyes and pupils moving if a shot feels too still. yeah that's all i got good night tristate area

[shima-draws]

Saw your tags and omg HARD AGREE. Dragon Cry is SO bad nfkanmdsa

ME AND YOU SHAKING HANDS

Actually yes thanks for giving me the excuse to rant. Hold on. I'm typing furiously rn.

-Okay first of all they gave us the most ridiculously confusing plot I've ever seen. The twist with Sonya being Animus was kinda cool but they never really. Explained why she had a bond with him? She mentioned he used to be kindhearted at some point but we never see that literally ever at any point in the movie?

-The storyline is so all over the place it's a HOT mess. Especially the scene right after Natsu escapes the weird bird cage thing he runs off to find the others and suddenly they're all there? For some reason? Where did they come from. Why didn't they have a little reuniting scene. I literally rewound the movie to make sure I didn't accidentally skip a scene but nope they just made the most awkward cut/story progression in history I guess!!!

-The fanservice was so. SO bad. Like yeah the majority of the time I can at least tolerate it but this time it just made me extremely uncomfortable. Why are Erza and Lucy's boobs SO fucking large. Why did they have to make Lucy dance in like two strips of cloth. I thought I woke up in an alternate universe where Fairy Tail was a hentai. I genuinely wanted to vomit lmao

-The animation style really threw me off like I can tell it was either animated by a different studio or they wanted to try a different art style for the movie? But it just felt wrong and the proportions and faces were weird and. Yeah idk.

-What was up with the Three Stars?? Iirc we never got to learn their names or what their motivations were they were literally just. There. And they were built up to be these super powerful wizards only to get their asses kicked by FT like two scenes later. I get that being a movie obviously the fights had to be shortened but they literally did the same thing in Phoenix Priestess but WAY better. They really were like yeah uh we need some enemies for Team Natsu to fight let's just go with these guys and not give them any personality or backstory or motivations. (Except for the doll dad he was okay I guess)

-WHY WAS LEVY THERE. LITERALLY. ACTUALLY. She literally did nothing she served NO purpose in the movie she was just there?? Did they just want to shove in as many cameos as possible??? I know generally Levy isn't much of a fighter which is fine, I was kinda expecting them to do a Gajevy scene where Gajeel rescues her from some soldiers or smth which would have been fine but they didn't even do that. She literally just stood there and had like 2 voice lines. GO GIRL GIVE US NOTHING

-SPEAKING OF CAMEOS this is more personal beef than anything but man WHYYY wasn't Loke in the movie,, my boy my beloved my stupid idiot lion I'm so mad he wasn't even onscreen for like, 5 seconds

-I'm sorry but Juvia was so unhinged this movie her possessive/stalker behavior over Gray was actually super fucking creepy lmao

-What did they do to Happy. What the FUCK did they do to Happy

THEY MASSACRED MY BOY. LOOK AT HIM. HE'S GOT ANXIETY

-ALSO the scene where Happy and Lucy were crying over Natsu and we got tons of flashbacks from his POV of people who are important to him? WHY THE FUCK WASN'T HAPPY THERE?? They literally showed everyone from Fairy Tail precious to Natsu except Happy and I'm just sitting here like. HELLO?? You are SO wrong for that

-I will say I DID enjoy the little Nalu teasers we got especially the scene where Natsu showed Lucy the stars 🤧

But yeah I was here for this and this only:

The Nalu + Happy family bonding moments made it OKAY

Anyway sorry rant over. Dragon Cry bad. Natsu's brief moment of looking half dragon was a super sexy character design choice but the buildup is not worth it imo

[undasura]

hi!! i love your art + ocs they are so cool i know you have an art FAQ but i was wondering if u had one for your dollies? i actually have been getting into them recently bc of you :D i was kinda just wondering about like models you have/where you got them from/where you get clothes for them from etc. im more interested in smaller scale ones generally but still if u wanna share anything that would be cool :3 thank you!! p.s. i love the 3d sculpts/prints you do for them its so cool....

thank you!!! i didnt think i'd get anyone into dolls actually lmfao

zephyr doll is an imomodoll 75, with jointed hands from DF-H

rali doll is a wip but she has an obitsu 50 skeleton/shins/feet/arms/hands, angel philia thighs, dollfie dream dynamite hips, and a dollfie dream flat L bust... shes a piece of fuckin work

their heads are sculpted by me with luv... hehe

anywho i usually get my clothes from luts! they carry a lot of nice stuff for zephyr's size (a whopping 2 feet tall...) i havent looked around for much stuff for rali yet. they also make dolls themselves as well

i actually ordered directly from imomodoll's tao bao shop via a proxy (super buy) to get zephyr's doll body which idk. i dont really recommend it's scary as fuck navigating that site. as for rali, i ordered the original obitsu 50 cm from parabox.jp and hybrided/modified the dollfie dream parts (ordered from the volks usa site) onto the skeleton. I got the AP thigh parts from faithz

if you're interested in smaller scale bjds I reccomend 1/6 scale lil guys. they're about 30cm tall usually (around barbie doll height) but typically, from what i know about, have more chibi/child-like proportions!

i've heard good things about tinyfox's 1/6 line and also imomodoll's 1/6 line - they're both vinyl bjds and have an internal skeleton as opposed to a resin bjd which are strung tightly with elastic. also i will say imomodoll and tinyfox have some suprisingly cheapo prices (around 200 iirc???) for their fullsets which include a faceup/wig/clothes/eyes/etc along with the doll itself.

i'm anti recast (which everyone should be btw. dont steal people's art. jesus) so i dont reccommend anyone shop for dolls themselves (like heads/bodies/etc) on aliexpress, temu, ebay or etsy--- they're usually stolen from the artists.

sites i can reccomend for buying legit doll stuff is alice's collection, jane's doll land, clover singing, and i think i've heard good things about stacy's pink ocean but i can't remember lol. those sites i just linked carry all sorts of stuff from official dolls to clothes and accessories to maintenance items.

if you're interested in getting vinyl dolls i recommend starting with an obitsu parabox like i did! they're cheaper than dollfie dreams and if you dont like their head sculpts for their dolls it's mega easy to mod a DD head onto one.

thank you!! ill probs make a doll faq soon so this doesnt get lost.

[turbles]

(I posted this on twitter back in early March but since that platform is going down the tubes rn I'm reposting here as well for archival purposes)

Some background here. 6 years ago I took up reading fanfic as a hobby. Very quickly I realized I'd need a way to mark which fics I'd already read or tried to read and dropped, so I wouldn't keep running across the same ones over and over and forgetting I'd already read them. So I started bookmarking EVERYTHING regardless of my actual opinion on it (I'll come back to this)

Anyway eventually I realized that, via the filtering options AO3 provides for your bookmarks, I had a pretty good way to collect pointless data about my reading habits and make some really pointless graphs. So when I reached exactly 2000 bookmarks I decided to do that. as a reward to myself.

data for the original 2000 was collected from whenever I started doing this, through March 6th 2023

Caveat: obviously the possibility of human error in this data is significant. I was never consistent on whether I should bookmark all individual fics in a series or just the series itself if I read the whole thing, for instance, and I've surely forgotten to bookmark plenty of things I did read over the years. this is just for fun though so I'm not sweating it.

thank god for how detailed ao3's tag system is tbh

Anyway here's a pie of all fandoms (with over 50 bookmarks):

For some temporal context of the above, I fucking counted every bookmark from the top 9 categories there and arrayed them by month-bookmarked so I could make this chart of growth rates:

Genshin impact will of course continue to grow because the game continually releases new stuff and characters. Numbers spiked in October coinciding with sumeru's release. we'll see if another spike happens once fontaine releases in a few weeks from now. interestingly to me, I started been playing genshin like 6 months before I started participating in the fandom because it took me that long to get accustomed to the uh.. genshin-ness of the characters and the story, enough to start making inroads towards actually caring about the characters.

looks like FE3H grew the fastest, but it will eventually plateau like yoi, dragon age, and ffxv before it. Still kinda going strong though,since there's just lots of people writing for this fandom, and helped by the fact that it has a really large cast.

This next chart will take a little background info. So to indicate to myself something about the quality of the fic, when bookmarking I would choose to "Rec" it or not. As I said previously, I am literally bookmarking everything I read whether I loved it or hated it or it caused me pain or whatever. My criteria for whether I Rec a fic or not has never been set in stone, but THE IDEA is that recced fics were ones I overall quite liked, felt were well written and would be willing to go back & reread or had something else that made them stand out from the crowd. A recced fic isn't necessarily one I would literally recommend to people to read, and non-recced could mean anything from it was good but had one part that bothered me, to I had just read a bunch of that author's other works and this one was weaker than their others, to it was horrendous and ruined my whole day, to it was just kinda boring.

HOWEVER I did add my own more curated tag, Greatest Hits, for the ones that I really loved, that stuck with me after reading it, that I regularly desire to go back and revisit. While I rarely ever adjust my recs, I have often added (even sometimes removed) the Greatest Hits tag from fics years after first reading them.

Anyway that means this chart could be said to express in a really general way my opinion on the general quality of the writing in a given fandom:

I found it interesting that AA has such a high proportion of recs. I think its overall lower number of total bookmarks works in its favor here, as I tend to dip toes into a new fandom by first looking at top-kudosed fics and then when I find authors I like, trawling their bookmarks for more and branching out that way. So I tend to find pretty good fics earlier in the process. the longer I'm looking through a more stagnated fandom, the less good fics I find, is I guess the logic here. So in the case of AA, I suppose I didn't get much deeper than skimming the cream of the crop before I moved on?

Comparing genshin and fe3h vs. dragon age and ffxv, which all have more similar total bookmarks, was interesting too, to explain why genshin/fe3h's ratio of recs is higher. Both genshin and fe3h have really large casts, and therefore lots of different characters and pairings to read about, so it's almost like each pairing is kind of its own pool of fics that I'm skimming the best ones out of. with DA and FFXV there's really only a couple ships I'm interested in, and their ratios are similar accordingly

because we all know. that the main draw for fanfic tends to be shipping. so here's the top 10 most bookmarked ships pie:

and because genshin and fe3h are sizable enough to warrant a further breakdown of ships for that fandom alone, here's some pies for that:

it makes me laugh that dimiclaude is statistically significant when really I was just trying it out and ultimately decided I really don't even care for that ship

And a growth rate chart for genshin impact ships specifically:

so funny story, as I was playing through the liyue story chapter I was NOT a fan of childe at all, in fact I passed up two of his reruns before reading on the wiki (almost immediately after his 2nd rerun ended) a key piece of his backstory that all of a sudden caused his whole characterization to fall perfectly into place in my mind and he shot up the list to being my top fav character in the game literally over the course of like ten minutes. and yeah that was november 2021 and as you can see that's when I started really reading genshin fics LOL

forecasts have haikaveh and cynonari continuing to trend up for a little while, though the next region and thus a whole new cast releases soon and could stymie those trends. zhongchi is a staple genshin ship and imo a bit more flexible content- and dynamic-wise than many of the other pairings here, so I predict it maintains a regular gentle incline even in the face of shinier newer pairings.

The less stacked roster fandoms don't have as interesting breakdowns, but here they are just for curiosity:

and yeah that's all I made at the time! I only thought of it after but I'll be recording data on Ratings from now on as well. I'd also considered looking at things like average word count on recs or greatest hits fics, but absent of even more highly specific filtering tools that would probably fall under diminishing returns. maybe someday.

This was dumb but very engrossing and fun to make and I learned how to use google sheets out of it so we'll see if that ever comes in useful in my life

[freebooter4ever]

Are the lines on your drawings stylistic choices or are they measurement/guiding lines? Either way, they are cool, but just wondered. I dont understand drawing at all, might as well be a magic spell to me. I was looking at the pencil (?) sketch of Malkin with the cheesecutter hat on.

i, uh, definitely did not google 'cheesecutter hat' until after i saved out these images. :/ sorry about that. if you'd like the other one broken down, i can do that too lol. my reading comprehension when im tired is kinda lazy i just saw 'cheese' and imediately thought 'omelette'. SO here's the 1) initial sketch, 2) 'clean' sketch, and 3) final lines for the omelette boy drawing instead:

also i have had a cumulative of about 9 ish hrs of sleep total for the past two days so keep that in mind for if this explanation makes no sense, its not my fault. :( anyway! the way i draw definitely has changed over the years but currently im really trying to focus on the line i "see" rather than the one that is actually "there". i've been applying this to my writing for years (story vs happening truth) and you know it never occurred to me that i could do it in my drawings too till like...a few years ago. in general these lines seem to form the planes of the subject. if you google 'stanford bunny' you can find an easy example of a 3D surface turned into triangles. I do this too - see things in relative triangle proportions, except i've been doing it long before i knew how computers worked. i cant begin to tell you how long d*sney and cartooning's obsession with round building blocks of anatomical structure fucked with my brain until i finally decided i could cast that teaching aside completely.

ANYWAY sorry off subject again. so we have these sketchy under lines, and usually as im trying to find the proportions and form of the subject these lines end up being where the light/shadow hits. here i saved out the 1) 'flat colors', 2) the 'light', and 3) the 'shadow' parts on their own (i lightened the background for the 'shadow' so its easier to see):

the light is like four or five 'overlay' layers of pale yellow/orange. you can see how each of these layers follow one of those sketchy lines i did initially. and the same with the shadow but instead its a dark red color set to 'multiply' for each layer. and when you combine everything together you get:

some bullshit :). anyway you know that anniversary edition of beauty and the beast that featured the version previewed to nyc audiences in 1990 with the glen ke*ne sketchy keyframe animation of the beast's transformation? i watched that - must have been sometime after i graduated college - and i felt robbed that THAT version was never presented as a final piece. the 'unclean' drawings had so much more life and movement and intensity to them. tldr i like the messy lines, i hate 'inking' with a passion (HATE. IT.), and when i finally allowed myself to stop giving a fuck drawing became way more interesting. but my art is shit and i will never be glen k*ane so i dont really feel like the best advocate for this "style". alas. there was this one artist on tumblr who i fucking loved whose sketches were SPECTACULAR but the asshole racists in the m*c*ha*nz*o fandom bullied her off tumblr and ive never been able to find her art anywhere else since. she was also very negative about her 'unclean' sketches and it made me so sad. there was also this other artist whose sketches were awe inspiring but all she drew was p*rn and well...we all know what happened on tumblr in december 2018.

also i 100% stole the lighting scheme from The Bear which is currently one of the most gorgeous shows on television right now in my opinion

im really really sorry if this makes no sense, if im feeling motivated maybe i'll try again when my brain is fully functioning but with the actual 'cheesecutter hat' doodle ^_^

[angeloncewas]

ohoho opinion time? let's go

obviously liking build mart or not is heavily dependent on who you're watching because you're more likely to enjoy a certain game, if the person you're watching is having fun. as someone who has consistently watched false's pov live (false my queen 🖐️), i like build mart. at the same time, it is kind of a shitty game and i 100% get why people, especially people like dream, would hate it. i'd hate it to of i were there, bro, memory? shit.

but like. i don't care? i usually don't care about stuff like this tbh but, as my track record suggests, i did go down some,, interesting people's blogs and posts and opinions on the matter

main big thing i see (mainly on tumblr btw bc i can't stand twt) are people wanting build mart removed or changed, mainly for dream. which imo is fair, a large reason parkour warrior was changed to tag was actually because of grian, and the way grian reacted to parkour warrior is very reminiscent to how dream treats build mart ngl. but like,, they did change build mart? between seasons? it wasn't a big change, but i remember literally everyone i watched (pvpers and builders) said the new change made it so much better. and i don't think they're going to remove it, just like they're not going to remove a lot of the pvp games. people prefer different games and that's just like,, how it is ig

big thing is dream's reaction, largely because he is one of the biggest people on mcc and has such a vocal disdain for build mart, so what he says, a lot of people will go with (kinda like mid game voting y'know, just with more dts) which is what creates the discourse, people mainly parroting what their favourite little meow meow says. and ofc this fandom is.. a wild one, so discourse is Discourse and the actual problem gets so skewed. i've seen people say noxcrew is ableist because of build mart? and that they're favouring hermits? which is. strange. bc if you look at the amount of pvp games i'd say they're more definetly not

imo i like build mart, i don't think it should be removed, unless there's another building (or ngl even redstone) based game that can replace it, but even then a lot of the pvpers are still gonna hate it, so there's no real winning here, just like grian still hates parkour tag. at the end of the day, it is still literally a minecraft tournament, and this is getting blown way out of proportion, but discourse is expected, and actually a lot of the time very civil. people just like arguing, let's be real lol.

anyway

feel free to disagree with me here, i love ur opinions and i like changing mine

-rabbithole

Appreciate the compliment afjdsk and I hope you're well, rabbithole anon ! I'll answer under the cut for length :)

> While it's definitely true that the streamer in question effects how you see the game, I don't think it's entirely up to that (not that you're saying it is, just my opinion). It's kind of boring to watch on the admin stream even though they can see any perspective they'd like, and the rush of winning imo is dampened by the activity itself even when the people are exceling. I haven't watched False though, so it's totally possible that she adds something special.

> I've seen some weird-ass thread on this topic too lol. Why y'all being so personal about a game you're not even in PLEASE /lh

> Dream was lying (affectionate) when he said that it hasn't been changed in ages, but I really don't know if the changes are enough. I actually say this as a Wilbur viewer - I remember him saying that the carts were definitely the problem after the first time they played the new map, but I'm pretty sure he hasn't exactly had stellar reviews of the game since. It doesn't feel much different, except for in aesthetic.

> That being said I don't have a solution to offer as an alternative. I don't think it should be removed unless they had a replacement equivalent ready, but I also can't say that it's perfect as-is, y'know?

> I've never seen people saying either of those things personally, but I don't doubt that they're out there and it's weird as fuck lol.

> I don't wanna keep rehashing the same arguments, but I guess my issue is the sort of "shut up and smile" mentality people have toward Dream. Not saying you do, just in general - why is Wilbur allowed to constantly scream about how Ace Race is a shitty fucking broken-ass game that needs to be burned in a fire while Dream can't even say he might opt out for his own enjoyment next time ? I know they're different people with different audiences, but I just don't like assigning that kind of responsibility based on coincidence and what have you

> People need to chill out and watch every single MCC VOD <3 ajfkds

(Sorry I'm not more convincing - I feel like I've said my piece since I never really had strong Build Mart beliefs to begin with - but I really appreciate your perspective and I hope you had a good MCC day lol)

[lillupon]

So, I've got a very long rant/opinion here and Idk really know how to say this without coming off kinda bad but I'm gonna say it anyways. I agree with the fact that the seventeen tag has been kinda dry lately on most fanfic places, but it's really only in the smut area. It's the sane way with other groups too I feel like. All of the nice little innocent tags are boomin to this day and thats completely fine. I think the smut tag is dry tho bc lately I feel like a few social issues (like sexualizing people and disrespecting them and their identity) have crossed over into kpop and have been ?blown out of proportion? Lately there's been a rampage of people who like to say that writing smut about someone is disgusting and is dehumanizing because people want to assume that it would make the idols uncomfortable which could equate to some morality issues on how you are reducing someone only to their body without their consent and a bunch of stuff like that. It kind of pisses me off bc this is fiction. About grown adults. Clamping down on horny people who simp over hot asian men isn't going to solve the issues we face in real life. I think a shit ton is wrong with the world we currently live in, and deciding to come after something that isn't even real bothers me. Like what does that actually accomplish. But yeah, I think thats a reason why smut has been dying down. I mean, on youtube almost every video about unpopular opinions, or things they dont like about kpop will include something about shipping idols in fanfics. And then everyone in the comment section will talk about how its all fine and dandy in moderation, but once people start writing smut it's crossing the idols personal boundaries. It's something I've been seeing a lot more often and I think people who are interested in writing smut are being turned away from it bc we've gotten to a point where people are being called disgusting for having fantasies.

Hi Anon, thank you for sending in this Ask. 

I want to preface this by saying: when I write or talk about Mingyu and Wonwoo fucking on my blog, it is a fantasy. I am not speculating about what the real Mingyu and Wonwoo might be like in bed. I am imagining the versions of Mingyu and Wonwoo that I have created in my head, that exist only in my stories. None of it is real. I understand that this can be a blurry boundary for some people. But for me, the separation between fantasy and reality is well-defined. Now, on to your Ask!

You’ve hit the nail on the head with this one. You’ve also touched on many of the issues I have been struggling with myself as of late. It’s difficult to argue about morals since everyone has a different set of values, as well as different comfort levels. Some people think real person fiction (RPF) is a gross invasion of privacy. Others are fine with it. And others don’t care one way or another. There is no single answer; I can only offer my answer. Which means, of course, people are welcome to disagree with it, or parts of it. 

In this essay (LOL But forreal: this is an essay), I will be sharing my experience in the k-pop fanfic community from 2014 to present, the etiquette I personally abide by as a reader and writer of RPF, as well as my stance on RPF in general.

I started reading and posting fanfics back in 2014/2015 on a website called AsianFanfics (AFF). Obviously, no one on that site had a problem with RPF, since AFF is a platform made specifically for sharing stories about Asian celebrities. For many years, I read and enjoyed RPF with zero guilt. I scribbled away by myself in my own corner of fandom and curated my own content. I didn’t interact much with other fans, readers, or writers. I didn’t have a Twitter, and I only used tumblr to reblog memes. As a result, I’ve been able to avoid a lot of anti-shipping discourse, as well as purity and cancel culture. I had no idea there were so many negative opinions about RPF. It wasn’t until I became active on the subreddit r/Fanfiction last year that I learned about all the discourse surrounding RPF. 

This newfound ‘awareness’ does make me feel guilty at times—but only because after mulling this over, I still don’t think this is something to feel guilty about.

Here’s what I remember, first and foremost, when I create and consume RPF: fanfics and my favourite ships are fictional, and fiction is fantasy. This is basic etiquette when it comes to RPF, and most people in the k-pop fandom understand this. Delusional fans exist, of course, but they are not representative of the entire k-pop community. 

Another point of etiquette is to keep fanfics within fandom spaces. I would never push my fics into celebrities’ faces, or go around claiming that my fanfics are accurate representations of a k-idol’s life or personality, in any way, shape, or form. I would also discourage directing ship-related questions to official accounts, or bringing them up during fansigns or other face-to-face interactions; I believe that in these instances, shipping does have the potential to strain real-life relationships.

So with basic etiquette out of the way, let me share my approach to RPF in general.

As much as we like to think we know our favourite celebrities, we really don’t. All we see is their public persona. And this public persona is intentionally controlled, managed, and curated by a team of people: directors, tabloids, editors, makeup artists, publicists, etc. How “real” are these celebrities? We are so distanced from them that they may as well be fictional.

I draw from the public persona that idols project, and I work them into my own writing. But at the end of the day, these personalities are my own interpretation. My interpretation is probably nothing like an idol’s actual personality. I just use the “public persona/character” that idols portray as inspiration for my own stories, which are set in wildly different universes.

More than anything, I think of k-pop idols as “actors” in my fic. You know how when you write an original novel, you scroll through Google images, looking for the perfect person to portray your original character? RPF is literally that, except you might build upon pre-existing dynamics and personalities.

When it comes to explicit fanfiction, two main concerns are prevalent: one of consent, and one of sexualisation.

If we argue against explicit RPF due to lack of consent, we should be willing to apply the same lens to all explicit works. How do we know that the creator of a movie, book, series, etc., is okay with us using their characters in our stories, explicit or not? We don’t. Perhaps some creators encourage fanfiction, but don’t want their lovingly crafted characters engaging in sexual acts or experiencing trauma. We just don’t know. I feel this line is even more blurred when we talk about characters from movies or TV series.

Let’s take Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes, as portrayed by Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan, from the Captain America movies as an example. I am willing to bet that when people consume and create explicit fanfiction about Steve and Bucky, they are imagining Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan in their heads. I doubt many people are imagining the 2D cartoon versions of Steve and Bucky, even though they’re technically the exact same characters. Why? Well, it could be because movies are more readily and easily consumed than comics, and so people are unfamiliar with comic book Steve and Bucky. But it might also be because fans find Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan attractive. Is this really any different from RPF, where fic authors make up everything about a celebrity’s life?  

When readers and writers of fanfic talk about how hot Steve Rogers or Bucky Barnes is, those comments are about Chris Evans and Sebastian Stan’s bodies. When reading explicit stories, fans are going to picture Chris and Sebastian’s bodies in their head, doing sexual things. Can we say, “Well, it’s not really you, Chris/Sebastian”, when in a way, it is?

The reality is, people are going to thirst over celebrities, regardless of whether or not explicit fanfiction exists. They’re going to post thirst tweets on Twitter. They’re going to talk to friends and strangers online about how hot [insert celebrity name here] is. They’re going to fantasize about dating and having sex with their favourite celebrity. Or, as it is in my case, they’re going to make up stories in their heads about their favourite idols dating and banging each other. People are going to do all of this without ‘getting consent’ from the celebrity. Cracking down upon and shaming writers of RPF isn’t going to change any of that.

To be honest, I’m not sure why people think it is disgusting to imagine sexual scenarios about real people. It is okay and normal to have these kinds of fantasies. I suppose the alternative is to fantasise about having sex with cartoon characters instead? It’s a very binary way of thinking to say that if you imagine/write real people in explicit scenarios, you are immediately sexualising, dehumanising, or objectifying them. There is more to dehumanisation than writing smut about our favourite celebrities. For one thing, you can love someone and appreciate all parts of them, and still want to fuck their brains out. And generally, fanfics come from a place of love—love that is not only sexual in nature.

Is it the sharing aspect inherent to fanfiction? The possibility that a celebrity might stumble upon explicit works about them? The chances are very low, I think, of the k-pop idols I enjoy writing about coming across my English fics. But I also believe in curating your own content, and that applies to celebrities too. Perhaps a celebrity should not go searching for fanfics about themselves. And of course, people should not show celebrities their fanfics, unless invited.

Another argument I hear against (explicit) RPF is, “How would you feel if someone wrote fanfiction about you?” First off, I don’t like this argument because there’s a difference between someone who decides to be a public figure versus someone who decides to remain a regular private citizen. Celebrities should and do know what they’re getting into when they choose their occupation. (This is not to say, “They are celebrities; sexualise them all you want because that’s what they signed up for.” Here, I am only acknowledging that people might have sexual fantasies about celebrities they are attracted to. Presumably, celebrities are cognizant of this.)  

If someone (whose existence I am not even aware of, mind you) decides they want to write explicit fanfiction of me in some tiny corner of the Internet, I wouldn’t care so long as: (1) they don’t shove it into my face, and (2) they don’t harass me and ask invasive questions about my personal life and relationships. It’s not hurting me or negatively affecting my life, so it wouldn’t even register as a blip on my radar. When fanfiction remains within its appropriate spaces, it is largely harmless. 

Now, if a k-pop idol were to ask their fans to stop writing fanfiction about them, would I? Yes, I would. However, I can’t imagine that happening. Judging by the number of ‘sexy’ concepts, fanservice moments, and variety shows such as ‘We Got Married’, I am certain that k-pop idols realise they are the stars of many fantasies—some of which are explicit in nature. Considering the prevalence of shipping in the k-pop industry, I would argue that shipping is subtly encouraged.

It’s sad that so many talented writers are shamed out of fandom, or feel that k-pop cannot be the medium through which they tell their stories, or explore their sexuality, or cope with trauma, or simply have fun. Professional works and Hollywood love their RPF—readers and writers of fanfics should be able to, as well. 

As you said Anon, “clamping down on horny people who simp over hot asian men isn't going to solve the issues we face in real life” (this is a lovely sentence, by the way). The kind of person who dehumanises another and reduces them to a sexual object will do so some other way, if not via fanfiction. I don’t think the issue of fetishisation can be fixed simply by telling people not to write explicit RPF. In my experience, people who read and write RPF are more respectful and thoughtful about these things than the general public. We’ve all seen the general public say highly sexual things about celebrities in the media and to their faces, or tag celebrities in their thirst tweets. Are these things less invasive than fanfiction? Personally, I don’t think so. And in my opinion, there are more pressing and damaging issues in stan culture than fanfic.

In conclusion, I don’t think there is anything wrong with creating and consuming RPF, both explicit and non-explicit so long as we:

Remember we are writing fiction

Keep RPF within its appropriate space, and

Do not harass celebrities about their personal lives and relationships

RPF is not for everyone. There may be people who enjoy RPF, but draw the line at explicit stories. This is fine. Everyone has their own personal preferences. What is not fine, however, is attacking people for creating things you don’t like. I’m not sure what kind of moral crusade people are on and what they hope to achieve by shaming writers of RPF, explicit or otherwise. Ultimately, fic authors are writing a fantasy. It’s not real; no one is being hurt. I think it’s important for people to curate their own content, and AO3 makes it very easy to filter out explicit works and unwanted tags. 

Maybe this is me trying to justify my own participation in explicit RPF—I don’t know. What I do know is that I love k-pop, and fandom is an important part of my media and entertainment experience. I adore the k-pop idols I write about, and I just want to imagine them being happy and getting lots of love and orgasms. Let a bitch be horny, goddamn… 

Some bonus fun facts!

At the time I am writing this, on AO3:

26.2% of Stray Kids fanfics are rated M or E

26.3% of Seventeen fanfics are rated M or E

29.0% of Merlin fanfics are rated M or E

34.9% of Captain America (Movies) fanfics are rated M or E

40.1% of BTS fanfics are rated M or E ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Coincidentally, I saw this post on Reddit this morning: Can we have a RPF positivity post?

[golden-redhead]

Do you think Kokichi is bi? Because of the "I like you" thing with Himiko. I can't figure out if it was genuine at all or not - it's a weird thing to write into Kaito's script just to get a reaction from her, but it's also weird given how heavy his crush on Shuichi seemed to be. Also I've recently come to terms with the fact that I'm bi and that my weird unexplainable feelings toward female classmates weren't actually unexplainable, hi.

Uhh, I have a feeling that many people will hate me for my response, it’s so full of controversial and unpopular opinions, but here we go, I guess.

Starting with the Himiko thing, I think it was mostly there to get a reaction out of her, it’s a very Kokichi thing to do in my opinion, maybe it seemed a bit out of nowhere, but if I really think about it I kinda have to admit that many of his comments sounded like that. Personally, I think people pay too much attention to that line? And I feel like it says much more about Himiko than about Kokichi. And how she actually has this... very heteronormative view of the world and it was very flattering for her to hear something like that from a boy, as opposed to her being clearly uncomfortable when Tenko was paying so much attention to her. I think that’s something more worth discussing than a passing comment that seems more like weird fanservice than anything else. Because that can be actually analyzed, this fact that she was pleased to hear that.

Secondly, I don’t really have, like... fixed... orientation headcanons. I just... don’t. And I never understood why fandom is so obsessed with them tbh. I’ve always seen the fact that my interpretations of characters as fluid as a good thing and I just... don’t really think about things like that, like... actively? For me it’s always been, what best fits the AU I’m writing or just a gut feeling that doesn’t really need to be overly analyzed, I guess. Especially since, you know, sexuality in general is fluid. As for bi Kokichi... For me bi Kokichi only works in AUs where he could have sex with women but I believe that romantically he’s exclusively attracted to men. unless we’re talking abt polyam relationships but that’s another topic entirely

Also, it’s gonna be super controversial, but... I don’t think... that Kokichi..... actually had a crush on Shuichi. Or at least it’s not that important whether he had or not because the game was more important.

There. I said it.

Like, I genuinely think that fandom took some small hints of it that could easily be interpreted as him being simply suspicious and kinda impressed by Shuichi’s talent and EXTREMELY blew it out of proportion.

And it doesn’t have anything to do with how I feel about this ship, I just genuinely don’t think it was there as much as fandom insists it was. As oppossed to komahina where it was all over the place and they had an actual bond and interacted a bunch of times.

I think that people in V3 fandom really tend to overlook how freaking suspicious Shuichi must have been in Kokichi’s eyes. People forget that we can sympathize with Shuichi’s actions and see where he’s coming from because we have the first person narration, but in REALITY, his actions must have been super suspicious if you analyze them from the perspective of other characters. We know he’s good. Kokichi can’t know that. Like, look... this guy solved practically every trial, no one else even really tried, he had full control during the motives reveals, it’s fucking dangerous to have someone this perceptive who could easily manipulate the facts and NO ONE would even realize. And then he goes and becomes friends with a fucking assassin and an optimistic idiot that had some pretty dangerous ideas and ability to motivate and convince people to do what he tells them to do.

I’m not denying that Kokichi might have had a crush on Saihara, but more than anything, I think he was suspicious of him and afraid of what could happen if he happened to be the mastermind or was somehow manipulated by Monokuma. I think that in a way he tried to focus on that more than on his feelings because letting them dictate his actions would get him and everyone else killed. And, story-wise, that is much more important but not really discussed in the fandom because of shipping wars and people forgetting that we know why Shuichi acts the way he does, but other characters can’t say the same thing.

But yeah, anyways, I’m happy to hear that you realized you might be bi : D It can be a bit scary and weird, especially this realization that ‘oh my god, all these years I’ve been attracted to girls and now suddenly EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE’, haha. Honestly, I’ve had 2-4 years to get used to the idea that I’m bi but it still blows my mind a little? I know how you feel! I’ve been there. And for me knowing that I’m bi, knowing that such a big part of me finally makes sense... Like some weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I hope it’s the same for you :3

[depths-of-escapism]

Alright! heres my 2021 end of the year art progress thing!, this year was a fucking mess lmao.

(keep reading to see high quality versions of the art pieces, my thoughts on each piece, and my mess of a year lol)

January. this was my first full month having a tablet! also my first time really messing with glitch effects in general.

Overall i remember feeling like i had so many things i wanted to draw and so many styles and it was all so new and fresh and agh i really got *into* art this month.

and then this art piece i feel like has aged pretty well!, the neck and shoulders feel off, but thats really about it!

February. yeah still just riding the high of having so many different ideas and concepts and honestly? this piece has always been one of my favorites lol

March. Andddd the final month i feel like of unique concepts before the spiral, also at this point i was really getting into the editing process and imo? getting pretty good at it.

April. The start of the spiral. uh, yeah, i've never really mentioned this on any of my socials but i do feel like it heavily effected my art but uh,

My father passed away unexpectly in april, he was uh, never really that good of a guy towards me so i was never really close with him but uh, yeah, when he died i was forced to accept that my relationship with him would never improve.

also honestly? i kinda felt happy when he passed, and realizing how fucked up that is i was forced to accept just like, how *bad* things were between us, and idk, i still have a lot of mixed emotions surrounding him.

in terms of the art piece its not very good, but i feel thats to be expected given context.

May. uh, yeah, the spiral kept contiuning, my great grandpa passed away this month, and i uh, i found myself crying and griefing him. and then i realized that i had cried more for him than my own father.

and that uh, kinda just fucking broke me.

also due to my family being smaller i ended up having to take care of all of the house chores & animals for the whole family, i only say this to explain i had far less time to actually make art compared to before.

for context before the spiral i was easily able to work on pieces for around 15 hours max. after the spiral i was only able to work on pieces for around 8 hours max (not that i ever really hit the max but i definitely started to rush my work more than before)

then talking about the actual art piece, uh yeah! another one i feel like has aged pretty well, its one of the few pieces I've actually taken reference photos for and it shows in the proportions and hands lol.

June. actually a pretty normal month, i do think this was probably around the start of me forcing myself to draw a lot more, and that uh, probably wasn't the move.

the art piece is uh, decent, i feel like the pose and cropping could of been done better though.

July. okay okay, final depressing life note for this post i swear.

but uh yeah! I got kicked out of my friend group of three years for being too depressed lol (like im not saying this as fuck them cause fair enough I'd think of doing the same in there shoes but uh, being told your too depressed to be around, yeah that hurt)

and uh, yeah, at this point i kinda felt like i had lost everything other than my art. and yeahhhhhhhhh def forced myself to draw *a lot* more then i should of.

still a good art piece though!, i do kinda feel like i started getting very stuck in one style though.

August.

another standard month, and the art piece uh, its very ambitious for how rushed it had to be. oh also its fan art of automagoria!

September.

starting to play around with style again and uh, i think it worked? some parts def look off but also that's kinda the point lol

(see post contiuned in the reblog)