#actin like it was intentional? like i specifically wanted him here so he has to experience firsthand the shit he's put me through

[kindacreepy-kindaugly]

So. Turns out he hates me (in part) cause I'm the reason he's here

[xbadnews]

MINI CHARACTER PLAYLIST

SHARE AT LEAST FIVE SONGS THAT REMIND YOU OF YOUR MUSE, OR THAT YOU ASSOCIATE WITH YOUR MUSE’S CHARACTER ARC. Including lyrics is optional.

i can hold a grudge like nobody's business - adam jensen

Living just to say goodbye Save me from my selfish pride Can you see the words written on my face?

okay so something i talk about quite a bit is that percy tends to live day to day. it's something he works on with time but it's not a linear process; he's someone who perceives himself as dead before the story started. he lives with the intent of dying, quickly, but not before these impossible string of events he thinks somehow, through his price, he & his friends can achieve. [ killing the briarwoods, r i p l e y , taking on the chroma conclave, stopping vecna ]

but while he feels he's destined for death [ or already dead ] he's b e g g i n g to be seen. i think it was @deathwalkerr that pointed out to me how badly percy wants to be feared, how badly he wants his innate danger to be acknowledged. his pride drives him to be impulsive, which mixes super dangerously with this inability to think about the future.

You got me actin' like the old me But you don't even know me

i like these lines mixed with the sentiment of him holding grudges because there is this bittersweet feeling that comes w him getting close w vox machina. they become the closest thing he has to family, they're the people he feels closest to alive with. but he feels unknown for a long, long time.

so while he starts to engage in more positive/fun things there's still this sentiment of ' you don't know who i was, you only know what i show you ' which kind of hangs over his head for a long time before he can trust himself entirely with vm. this being said, i definitely think keyleth is the first person to draw him out of this mentality. she's the first one to bring his walls down & see percy's fluctuating definition of ' self ' .

Can I get a witness? 'Cause I can hold a grudge like nobody's business Seein' double vision Show me what you got and I'll show what you're missing

this is the chorus!!! a huge part of why it's here. again, playing off of that desire to be seen as dangerous. to be seen as unpredictable. to be handled with the caution he does not have. yes! got a lot of positive traits. he tries to be good but good is not the priority. he's also petty, angry & often unafraid when he should be.

it's also sort of a sentiment of ' well you aren't seeing it so i'll Show You ' but that's a whole nother conversation.

2. arsonist's lullaby - hozier

so first of all before i get into specifics, i have to clarify that this is one of my favorite songs for percy. one of the themes of this blog i like to dig into is utilizing your demons, using the worst parts of yourself to do what you think is necessary.

When I was a child I heard voices Some would sing and Some would scream You soon find you have few choices I learned the voices died with me

this is a sentiment i love. sort of plays off of when percy met the raven queen & asked if he was always broken & she answered yes. there's always been a darkness within him, an urge that couldn't quite be satisfied. i have this headcanon that as a kid, percy was a secret thrill seeker. he'd climb whitestone walls & frame his siblings for pranks & get up to all sorts of trouble.

he rarely got caught because no one was ever looking at him, he's the backup of a backup & what he's doing was always secondary to whatever his older siblings were doing. so there's always been this wildness within him that's manifested in different ways, that he's used in different ways. as a kid, it was just to get a thrill. as an adult it's a stronger beast entirely, but it is the beast the forged his survival.

All you have is your fire And the place you need to reach Don't you ever Tame your demon But always keep 'em on a leash

this plays on that thought of ' that beast forged his survival '. it's like, even in his most desperate times he still had that wild will to live. that rabid, instinctual fire to live. has it burned through his life like a storm? yes!!! in so many places ashes is all that's left. but you can do so much with ash. you can make ink, bricks, compost.

it's this sentiment again of utilizing that fire within him regardless of the consequences because that fire is how he's survived. it's costed so much, but it's always been apart of him. it will never not be. it's just a matter of learning how to manage it in a way that he can still live a life. that he can build whatever fluctuating definition of the future he's trying to work towards, whether or not he's able to view himself as a part of that future.

When I was a man I thought it ended When I knew loves perfect ache But my peace has always depended On all the ashes in my way

again, it's that idea of ' you can do so much with ash ' & as he grows up, he does. he absolutely does. he doesn't put out his fire, but he learns how to manage it. it's like this shift between ' what it's done to him ' to ' what he can do with it'. he learns to love longterm, he cares longterm with time. it's not a linear journey by any means, but it's one he takes. but he still uses his fire to protect his home, his friends, his family. he keeps growing, but never forgets what exists within him. what he can use to make sure he never loses it again.

3. hi ren - ren

so i'm going to clarify before digging into this that i have a lot to say on this song. it is a song based in mental illness but i also have it on percy's playlist because it definitely feels like how i imagine percy's relationship w/ orthax is. but i also love it as a back & forth because one of the things i preach is that percy's healing journey is not linear. some days are harder than others & i feel like this song nails the battle within self.

And I've been making some progress lately And I've learnt some new coping skills So I haven't really needed you much, man I think we need to just step back and chill

there are a few chunks of this song talking about doing a little better, looking at the present in a different light than his usual perception. it's this idea of 'getting better' & trying to leave old habits, old pieces of yourself in the past. which as talked about previously, does not work for percy. he defines survival by the worst, most ferocious pieces of himself & orthax is one of those things.

And when I'm gone, maybe I'll be remembered For doing something special with myself That's why I don't think that we should talk, man 'Cause when you're with me, it never seems to help

again that feeling of ' i am doing better, i will do better ' which is part of like percy;s endgame. he wants to be remembered beyond the weapons he put into this world, he wants to be better than he was previously & thinks that he can be. knows that he can be, eventually. but there is this scar of orthax left in percy's mind that leads to moments like the next lyrics.

You think that you can amputate me? I am you, you are me, you are I, I am we We are one, split in two that makes one, so you see You got to kill you if you wanna kill me I'm not left over dinner, I'm not scraps on the side Oh, your music is thriving? Delusional guy

i like these lyrics because it makes me think not only of orthax targeting ripley as a conduit to get back at percy, but also like the thoughts left from getting rid of orthax. it's like this thought of even if he's gone, it doesn't change the darkness within percy. it doesn't change his capacity for violence. it's this feeling of ' i will never be free from this part of myself & it will always remind me '

Fuck you, I don't need you, I don't need to hear this 'Cause I'm fine by myself, I'ma genius And I will be great, and I will make waves And I'll shake up the whole world beneath us

but percy snaps back. he cultivates this faith in people via vox machina, which leads to faith in self that again is not a linear progression but it's one he treasures. he knows this nastiness is apart of him but it doesn't stop him from wanting to be better, from trying to be better. he has changed the world & wants to continue to do so despite this internal pull away from self-help.

When standing in-front of my solar eclipse My name it is stitched to your lips, so, you see

this is another bit talking about orthax/percy's darkness as being a part of him, regardless of the growth he goes through. it will always exist within him, whether or not he wants it there.

As I got older, I realised that there were no real winners And there were no real losers in physiological warfare But there were victims and there were students

this line specifically i feel like alludes to one of my headcanons abt him absorbing bits of the people around him, absorbing bits of ripley specifically when he was in captivity. just that thought of ' there are victims & there are students ' like percy learned how to survive via his suffering rather than allowing it to kill him.

It was never really a battle for me to win, it was an eternal dance And like a dance, the more rigid I became, the harder it got The more I cursed my clumsy footsteps, the more I struggled So I got older and I learned to relax And I learned to soften and that dance got easier It is this eternal dance that separates human beings From angels, from demons, from gods And I must not forget, we must not forget That we are human beings

this is just here because these lyrics shape how i view percy's state of mind. ' the more i cursed my clumsy footsteps, the more i struggle'. it plays off of the sentiment of the last song, that this darkness, that orthax will always be a part of him. what he's done will always be apart of him. his mental illness will always be apart of him. but it does not define him. it's not all he is. he has fucked up, he will continue to do so, but he will keep going. it really lends to the shift between ' i will die, i am dead ' to ' i want to live, life is too full to miss '

4. this too shall pass - danny schmidt

My friend makes rings She swirls and sings She's a mystic in the sense That she's still mystified by things But scared to ask How can nothing seem to last

these lyrics specifically make me think of how percy views keyleth. their relationship is one of my favorites & i think these lyrics really hit the nail on the head for his view of her. specifically ' She's a mystic in the sense that she's still mystified by things ' because he see's her learning journey firsthand & plays a part in it. but there is this anger within her that burns things up, just like the fire within him.

i also love this song in terms of he & keyleth's relationship because of the sentiments surrounding how temperamental life is. like it passes, quickly. percy's life will be the blink of an eye to keyleth, there will be a day when she forgets his voice, the wrinkles on his forehead, passing details that won't matter in a couple hundred years. does he think she will forget him? sometimes. but he knows in his heart she wont. but that doesn't make life any longer, existence any more permanent.

also i like these lyrics because it sort of sells this idea of the peace they work towards relentlessly being a temporary solution. their work together will one day be undone & all they can do is hope it will last the span of their lives.

So I pray to hands And I pray to needs And I pray to blades of grass To find forgiveness in the weeds

percy is faithless, he doesn't hold much trust in the gods. but he has faith in the people he loves. he believes in his family. so though he doesn't practice religion, love is the closest thing he's got. which is a hard pill to swallow for him when his instinct is anything but love, when the instinct that has driven him to survive for so long. but because of him practicing love ( to the best of his ability ) he tries to practice forgiveness. it's hard, relentlessly so, but he makes that active effort to work towards it. there will always be someone wretched, but he was wretched once too. does that mean he has to trust them??? absolutely not! but that doesn't mean he's going to condemn them either.

I just never did believe And so I never prayed myself Except to those that prayed for me

this plays off of that last idea, that the closest thing to religion he has is love. that the closest thing he has to faith is in people.

5. up the wolves - the mountain goats

There's bound to be a ghost at the back of your closet No matter where you live There'll all ways be a few things, maybe several things That you're gonna find really difficult to forgive

here's that theme of forgiveness/healing not being a linear journey. percy forgives the people who hurt him in theory. it's a means to move past what they did to him, to become more than what happened to him. but that doesn't mean it's an easy process. he decides to forgive ripley right before she kills him & there is a lot of emotional debris from this

also bonus song: i'm not angry anymore plays on this theme. [i'm not angry anymore, well sometimes i am.] it's like this feeling of wanting to be better, wanting to forgive but it's a whole process when that ability for danger & to take a grudge has defined so much of what he's accomplished up until this point. it defines a part of him that he begs to be feared, that he uses as a weapon in survival. but survival doesn't have to be a fight & in order to accept that, he has to let go of a few things. of alot of things. which is not easy, it's one of the hardest things he's ever done. including taking down a literal god. but man, is it worth it.

There's gonna come a day when you'll feel better You'll rise up free and easy on that day And float from branch to branch, lighter than the air Just when that day is coming, who can say? Who can say?

again, it's this feeling of forgiveness not being a linear journey. one day he will feel better, one day things will be better & eventually he is able to see that. but it's not an immediate effect. saying you forgive someone & actually forgiving them are two separate things & it takes a long time to do, but it's something that is eternally worth doing.

he accepts the parts of himself forged by the people who's hurt him, by the people he's hurt. he accepts that they will always be apart of him, but stops holding it against them if that makes sense??? it's a huge weight off of his shoulders, but it's not immediate. it takes time, but one day he does feel better. one day he gets to be better.

tagged by: @mindhallow [ thank you this is my favorite thing to do ] tagging: @delightfalse, @deathwalkerr, @spellwound, @countercharmd , @xavthew0rld , @whalefelled, @heartheaded, @lunarfey, @luxcruor, @chosenpower, @vchloras, @firefurious

[koszmar-zycie]

⛔ - do they believe in revenge?💫 - do they believe in fate/propecy/destiny? for all your darling!

Koszmar: “I’m conflicted, regarding revenge. Some people will try to differentiate revenge and justice; often citing the difference in motivation. One being emotional, and the other being rational. I’ve gone back and forth between yes and no, as well as which label suits me best. I find that the ends are always the same, and so “revenge or justice” doesn’t matter. Most moralities are the same, simply with varying details. So in the short sense, I do. Because I believe that there are many things that should not go unpunished. As for destinies and fate, I suppose I do. In a somewhat blurred sense. I feel like many have a specific destiny to fulfil, though it may not be terribly grand. Similarly, I also feel like some people are born with a purpose as opposed to destiny. The different being that you’re not given a destination, so much as a motivation. For example, I don’t believe my ‘destiny’ is to destroy the Alliance or slay some great named evil. But I do believe that I was born and reborn as Forsaken with the purpose of strengthening the Forsaken and the Horde.”

Taima: “Hmm. Revenge is an iffy thing. I know that those such as our great leader Baine, or the Alliance’s King are often motivated by revenge. Even if they say otherwise. Which is not a fault. As Koszmar says, the ultimate endgame is the same. Perhaps there’s a taint that blinds them, but for the most part they seek a clarity and peace through their desire to see a wrong atoned for. Then you have those, such as Greymane, who wields revenge as a fuel for mindless bloodshed and violence. I know many of my Alliance friends even feel the same, though few would ever speak such words. That man is a great king and seasoned, experienced man. Yet he will never know peace, because he does not honor his son through aimless and purposeless slaughter. Ultimately, no. I do not believe in revenge. Though I can see how pretty much any man or woman could be claimed by it. Now, as far as fate and destiny? I suppose it’s not really mine to say. I’d like to think so, but to be honest, I’d rather just focus on the now and what I can do, rather than what I may or may not have been assigned by a greater power!”

Xiuying: “I should say not. As Taima said, most of us would be controlled by it in some respect, as it is easy to fall to if you have something to lose. But by default, I do not think it serves a terribly useful purpose. I’d rather see things resolved without the need for such reactionary responses. Fate is funny. In Pandaren culture, we have often heard of fated heroes and the destiny of this or that. It’s kind of engrained into our culture and mentalities. In many ways I do believe in fate. I couldn’t really tell you how. I can see how certain spirits or deities might shape mortal beings into instruments for good or evil, and set them onto a particular path, though.”

Haytham: “Revenge. Ugly word. Of course, not one that arguably most of us haven't followed. Being Gilnean it’s easy to see that Lord Greymane had sent most of us on borderline suicide missions against the Horde in the name of vengeance against the Forsaken. I believe the Tauren Shaman said it best, there. I know a great many Gilneans who would throw their life down for Genn’s revenge. I also know many who see that it is a blind rage, and as a fairly experienced former first mate, I can tell you that blind rage almost always kills that who wields it. I hate this war. Honestly. Regardless of my feelings of the Horde or the Forsaken, I hate the whole thing. Of course I sail for Greymane, but I have dramatically grand fears that his attempt at justice is vastly more motivated by hatred and rage than by true justice. And I would prefer that he not lose his own life to such a thing. Few of us who believe this dare speak our minds. Many feel that hatred is the only way, and that handling the Horde or Forsaken intelligently is a sign of betrayal. I, however, will NOT apologize for wanting to see Lord Greymane alive and well. Anything else is... no pun intended... throwing him to the wolves. Or I suppose, allowing him to throw himself to the wolves. That’s a FAR more traitorous action that trying to reign in his aggression.”

“As for fate? Sure. Why not? I’ve seen many strange and otherworldly things in my time at this point. Fate or destiny wouldn’t seem half as outlandish as any of those things.”

Rahab: “Revenge. It’s what most, if not all, Death Knights are driven by. I’ve made it clear that once the war broke out again and everything went to s**t, that I stand strictly by my brothers and sisters of Acherus, and not Horde or Alliance. The stupidity and blindness of both factions baffle me, as one born of peace and reborn of vengeance. We didn’t unite against the Lich King to make heinously flawed comparisons to former villains in order to force another war, or petty civil war. Some vengeance is acceptable. Fake vengeance is not. You wrote your own fate. You betrayed your own fate. You don’t have the RIGHT to blame someone else and call for vengeance and justice. All who would say otherwise are nothing more than pathetic mongrel beasts in need of culling.”

“Fate? Perhaps. Was it our destiny to be slaughtered and then reborn into suffering? Perhaps. If so, I would love to know what we did to deserve such fates. Elf. Goblin. Human. Gnome. Tauren. Dwarf. All the others. If my comrades and I don’t stand as proof that fate and destiny are flawed, and that the living simply cling to any excuse to bleed, then I don’t know what does. Destiny and fate.” Rahab spits onto a dirty stone brick near a corner of the chamber. “Honestly.”

Willow: “Hahahaha!” Willow laughs, though without sinister intent. Rather, it is the laugh of someone who has genuinely heard quite a humorous joke. “Revenge? You’re asking a Forsaken about revenge?” She kicks her feet up in typical, casual Willow fashion. Pale skin tintly ever so slightly green. “You’re serious? Of course revenge is valid! Take that stupid wolf. We were in a war. Apparently his kid knowingly and intentionally got in the way of the Dark Lady and the geezer. Greymane blames Sylvanas for that? Maybe he was a good kid, but that dumbass committed suicide there, friend. It’s the fault of the tower someone jumps from. But here we are, being lectured by Greymane and his Alliance buddies (and some Hordies with flimsy morality - she whispers additionally) about revenge and justice? HA!” Willow flips a leg over the other, and brings them down, one crossed in a sitting position. “Look. Revenge is a thing. It’s not justice. It’s not even concrete. It’s just something you say after you’ve been beaten in order to feel better about your desire to hurt others. I don’t have any interest in hurting the Alliance by and large. I’m sure plenty of them seek peace with us. But a great many don’t. And for that, MY revenge is filling their arteries with pretty, lovely toxins and letting their red ink paint my canvases.” 

“As for fate and destiny and all that, I don’t really care, to be honest. I just want to survive. And help those who deserve to survive, survive. And for those who don’t?” *willow spins a pair of black and red daggers with bat motifs before re-sheathing them. 

Ja’Zara: “Revenge be dangerous. Real dangerous. Ya can’t expect it ta bring ya peace. In a way, I agree with Willow on one ting. Dat revenge is something ya get as a result of damage or defeat dat ya already suffered. It’ll aaaalways be a chain, mon. I can get behind quick and clean revenge. But otherwise, I’d hafta heavily retink it before actin’. If ya let it build, it’ll just keep goin’ on and on and on. And dat don’t help nobody.”

“Now, as for fate and destiny, I can say dat I believe it. Da Loa and everyting we’ve been taught and raised with tells me dat. We make our own way, but it don’t mean dat dere isn’t sometin’ else bigger den us dat wants us to achieve sometin’ with real impact. Know what I mean, mon?”

****************************************************

Thank you so much @stonestridernerd! This was a good one to go through!

[adapted-batteries]

Whatever You Need

Fandom: The Librarians

Rating: general/sfw

Relationship: pre-relationship Jazekiel

Word Count: 7837

Stone learns Ezekiel remembers the video game loop, and that it’s troubling his sleep, so he decides to do something about it. 

Also posted on my Ao3.

---

“Ever since you saw that girl on the tv show, you had a thing for her. That’s why the potion didn’t work on you. You were already in love with her.” Stone watched Ezekiel for a moment, taking the thief's hesitation as confirmation.  He walked away, leaving Ezekiel alone in the Annex, confident his theory had been correct.

Until he remembered the look on Ezekiel’s face, that is.

A sense of unease had fluttered in the back of Stone’s mind as soon as he left. He couldn’t quit thinking about it, regardless of what he attempted to occupy himself with in the Library. Looking at the stack of books in front of him, Stone sank into the reading chair, giving in to whatever his mind was trying to point at him.

Something about Ezekiel’s response wasn't...right. He dropped trying to play it off really fast, way too quickly for Ezekiel Jones, but he didn’t own up to it either...he should've been flaunting the reason he was immune, that's just how Ezekiel normally acted. And that look, Ezekiel was going to say something, but didn’t. It wasn’t an embarrassed silence, there wasn’t any flush on his face. How could he have read him so wrong?

“Ugghnn,” Stone groaned, leaning forward in the chair and shoving his face into his hands. He then leaned back into the chair, sighing at the ceiling, before standing up to go find Ezekiel.

Stone caught Ezekiel nose deep in some book on one of the desks. Apparently the others had already left, or were still somewhere in the Library; only Ezekiel occupied the Annex, furiously studying whatever it was. Stone soaked up the image for longer than he should have. “Hey, Jones, um,” Stone started, not expecting Ezekiel to spook.

Ezekiel jumped at the sudden noise, slamming the book shut like his life depended on it. He looked up at glared at Stone, unease already pooling in his stomach. “What? Come to make fun of me?”

Stone gave him a confused look. “No I…” Stone faltered, words suddenly leaving him.

Ezekiel raised an eyebrow. Somehow Stone not teasing him was making that unease worse. “Yes?”

“I, uh, I came to apologize, for uh, what I said earlier,” Stone stammered, wishing he hadn’t left that rather comfy chair.

“And just what is it you’re apologizing for, hmm?” Ezekiel quipped, his snarky defense wall going up.

“I shouldn't have assumed what I did,” Stone said, earning a “go on” look from Ezekiel. “I jumped the gun on the first thought I had, didn’t think about...anythin’ else that might affect my theory.”

“Having fun beating around the bush, mate?” Ezekiel asked, throwing in too much sarcasm than it needed. It did its job though, getting Stone to open his mouth slightly in confused surprise. For some reason Stone’s face riled up Ezekiel even more. “Are you gonna call me gay now and bully me like the football jock I know you were?”

“I...what?” Stone had no clue why this conversation was diving headfirst into alligator infested sewers, nor why he felt that weird pang in his chest at the last bit of Ezekiel’s statement. “My past has nothin’ to do with this,” He heard himself say much more angrily than he meant, which fanned Ezekiel’s flame hotter.

“Of course not, ‘cos I shouldn’t except some backwards hick to think outside of his little hometown,” Ezekiel spat, sitting on the edge of the chair.

“Why...you don’t know how much I wanted to get away from that shit? To be myself instead of the box I was forced into?” Stone said, not quite shouting. He didn’t know why Ezekiel was prodding him; he closed his eyes and breathed in, trying to calm himself down. “Where is this comin’ from?”

“All you ever do is tease and belittle me, why should I expect any different when you act like you know everything,” Ezekiel replied, practically seething.

“I don’t...if you’d quit actin’ like such a child…” Stone stopped himself, trying to de-escalate the argument. “What is this about? I’m serious.”

“Of course you’re serious now-”

“Ezekiel!” Stone didn’t mean to shout. The way Ezekiel flinched made Stone think back to when his dad would yell at him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean-”

Ezekiel was a lot more rattled from Stone’s shouting than he should’ve been, mainly because his shout sounded just like one of the times Stone had shouted at him to attempt to alert him to an oncoming rage person...a bit too late.

“Ezekiel?” Stone asked, voice much softer than it had been. Ezekiel didn’t notice that he came around the desk and was at his side, looking at him with concern.

“I...um, I zoned out, didn’t I?” Ezekiel said, his voice shaky.

Stone looked at him, eyebrows furrowed slightly. “You could say that...what’s goin’ on?”

Ezekiel looked up at Stone, giving him a similar face to earlier, like he was keeping himself from saying what was actually on his mind. He didn’t want to talk about any of it right now.

This time Stone caught it. “Whatever it is, just say it...and don’t dodge me this time.”

Ezekiel looked away, not very sure that he wouldn’t break down. “You remember the DARPA place?” Ezekiel asked, immediately scoffing at himself. “Of course you don’t. Well, um, I went through a whole lot of respawns...not always because I died-”

“Wait, you remember? You told us you didn’t,” Stone interjected, earning a glare from Ezekiel.

“Do you want to hear about my trauma or not?”

“Sorry...uh, go on,” Stone stammered, sitting on the desk.

Ezekiel leaned back in the chair, shutting out the growing urge to bolt. “I didn’t remember right after. It didn’t start coming back until the whole Sicily thing. And no, I don’t know why, it just did, ok?” He sighed, gathering his thoughts. “Being in a video game is not as fun as you think. I respawned...a lot, sometimes because I died, though mostly because one or more of you guys went down, and, uh, the rage people, they weren’t gentle in their methods of killing.” Ezekiel shuddered in his chair, face a bit pale. “You...uh, you yelled like that to try to alert me a few times...not that it helped.”

Stone bit back his response; him being sorry wasn’t going to make Ezekiel feel any better. He tried to formulate a good response, but Ezekiel took his silence as oversharing.

“I’m alright, it’s not too bad, just stuff like that, if it’s super specific,” Ezekiel added, shaking his head. He stood up, intending to leave.

“You sure?” Stone asked, standing up as well.

“I’m fine,” Ezekiel snapped, defenses going back up. “It’s late, I’m going home.” He started towards the main door.

“Alright,” Stone said. He couldn’t help feeling like whatever progress they made just diminished.

Ezekiel didn’t wait to hear Stone say “goodnight.”

---

Whatever time it was, it was well into the night. Stone knew that based on the fact that his eyes were trying their best to signal their tiredness at him. He promptly ignored them and kept reading. Recently, he found a nice reading chair at a second hand furniture store, and since then his ability to ignore his need for sleep had gotten stronger.

Stone about leapt out of the chair when loud, erratic knocking came from his door. He glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. It took his eyes a moment to focus on the hands; it was working towards 1:30 in the morning. The knocking sounded again, somehow more urgent. Stone walked over to the door, quietly, peering through the peephole and seeing...Ezekiel? He fumbled with the lock and opened the door.

“What’re you doin’ here? It’s late,” Stone said, motioning Ezekiel inside his apartment. He looked lost, jumpy, on-edge, so Stone steered him towards the small couch he had and went into the kitchen to make something comforting for Ezekiel to drink.

Ezekiel wasn’t quite sure why he came here. He just remembered waking up from another nightmare, the overwhelming desire to make sure Stone was okay, and somehow ended up at Stone’s place in once piece. A hot mug of cocoa is in his hands helped him remember the time, and temperature outside, and his lack of warm enough clothing. Stone was one step ahead of him, already draping a blanket around his shoulders by the time Ezekiel thought to ask for one.

Stone scooted his reading chair to better face Ezekiel, then sat in it, watching him intently. He waited for Ezekiel to stop shivering, and down about half the mug of hot chocolate, before he leaned forward, hands clasped in front of him, elbows on the tops of his legs. “So, ya gonna tell me why ya showed up at my house in the middle of the night?”

He could make an excuse, or just not say much, but he did just show up to Stone’s house pretty out of it, and there wasn’t going to be an easy way to explain that without Stone getting on his case. For all he knew, Stone was assuming he was on something. After staring into the half empty mug for what seemed like an eternity that fit into about ten seconds, Ezekiel looked up at Stone. He decided being bluntly honest was the best idea. “I needed to make sure you were alive.”

“Alright...and why did ya need to know that?” Stone asked, concern filling his face. Ezekiel hesitated, biting his lip. Stone racked his mind for what could be the cause, though admittedly his brain was a bit sluggish from the late hour. Then he remembered the last time he saw Ezekiel shaken up. “You had a flashback, didn’t you, like a couple weeks ago?”

Ezekiel shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal. “More like a reoccurring nightmare, but yeah.”

Stone took a deep breath instead of telling Ezekiel that this wasn’t something he needed to be dismissive with. “What was the nightmare about?”

“I don’t remember it all,” Ezekiel said automatically. He drank some more hot cocoa, knowing full well he remembered exactly what terrified him enough to come to Stone’s apartment. Stone didn’t buy his excuse; he just sat patiently and waited for Ezekiel to continue. “A rage person took you by surprise, from behind, before I could do anything about it.”

Stone nodded, deciding he didn’t need to press for more details. “How long have the nightmares been going on?”

“Uh, well, since I started remembering,” Ezekiel answered, earning another concerned look from Stone. “The flashbacks during the day weren’t much compared to the dreams, really.”

Anger bubbled up in Stone’s chest, but he fought it down; being angry with him hiding that was going to ruin any chance of Ezekiel ever coming to him again. He kept that feeling out of his voice for the most part, but he still sounded annoyed. “Why didn’t you tell anyone about this?”

Ezekiel knew Stone was mad at him. His heart rate sped up of its own accord, and he kicked himself internally for looking at the door and judging if he could make it out before Stone stopped him. “I couldn’t. I just...I didn’t want to be seen as messed up,” he finally said, fighting his growing urge to bolt. He made himself focus on the last swig of now warm cocoa in his mug. “I didn’t want to give anyone a reason to want me gone.”

“So you were just going to hide it till it made you do something like this?” Stone asked, losing his battle with his annoyance. “Do you even know how ya got here? Ya could’ve gotten hurt, or hurt someone else.”

Ezekiel looked up at Stone, eyes narrowed, but hurting. “You think I’m not freaked out about this?” he quipped, waving his free hand around. “I thought I could deal with it myself, no need to involve anyone, not having to deal with...this.”

The hurt in Ezekiel’s voice pinned Stone back into his chair. He took a moment to steady his emotions. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean...I’m just really, look. I care for you, and nothing you could do would make me want ya gone. I know hidin’ stuff is what ya do, but this isn’t somethin’ ya need to be dealin’ with alone.”

Ezekiel bit his lip again, this time overwhelmed with the sorry concern from Stone. No, Stone shouldn’t be taking the blame for this; this was on Ezekiel. He shook his head. “No, this is on me. It’s a wake up call I guess. I’m lucky nothing bad happened, but something could’ve easily went wrong.”

“No,” Stone retorted, defensive. Ezekiel gave him a confused look, so Stone explained. “It’s on us too, for makin’ you feel like ya couldn’t talk to us. I dunno how much is from your past and how much is us, but obviously we’ve not done enough to make ya feel like you can confide in us.” Ezekiel opened his mouth to protest, but Stone held up a hand. “I know we’re not as bad as the folks in my hometown. They didn’t think my father was in the wrong at all for what he was doin’, but I wouldn’t say we’ve done much of any confidin’ in each other in stuff like that, ‘cept for maybe when you were stuck holding the door open with Cassandra I guess.”

Ezekiel chuckled as he remembered. “I wouldn’t exactly say it was a mutual sharing of truths,  but I certainly learned a lot of random things about her.” His smile faded as he remembered what Stone said before that. “What happened with your dad?”

Stone didn’t feel up for talking about it, even after not hearing from him since he was last in Oklahoma, but Ezekiel shared, so he needed to do the same. “Well, you met the man. He, uh, was an alcoholic to say the least. I thought it was normal, he wasn’t the only one in town doin’ that for sure, but I came across some books and realized he’d been abusin’ me most of my childhood, enough to make me the man you met three years ago.” Stone laughed bitterly at himself, running a hand through his hair. “You’d think once I knew, I’d do somethin’ about it, but I didn’t, I just let it happen. Made a solid shell around myself that he approved of and that was that. ‘Course it didn’t stop there. I made shells for myself everywhere, to hide away, keep myself safe.” He looked up at Ezekiel, sorry in his eyes. “Then I dragged you both into keepin’ that shell there. I knew it was wrong, and I tried to get rid of the oldest shell I had, but I didn’t. I tucked my tail between my legs and ran away back to the Library.”

“Facing your abuser isn’t an easy thing to do,” Ezekiel said. He had a suspicion that something was up when they were in Oklahoma, but he never pressed it. It had been too early in their friendship, but Ezekiel hadn’t forgotten.

Stone sighed, looking up at the ceiling. “This wasn’t supposed to be about me.”

“Actually, I think you helped, a little bit anyway,” Ezekiel confessed. “Not that I want to hear all about your messed up childhood, but, well, now I know you’re like me, in a way.”

Stone was mildly shocked at Ezekiel’s admittance. “Well, uh, glad I could help.”

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention this to anyone,” Ezekiel said, finishing the last of his cocoa.

“Seriously? Not after I let you see a glimpse of my past?” Stone asked.

“Would you like me running around telling everyone?” Ezekiel scoffed.

Stone shrugged, realizing his hypocrisy. “Alright, this stays between us. But you aren’t fine, and you came to me, remember that. You can get better, but ya sure as hell won’t if you don’t talk to someone about it. I don’t care if it’s me, just don’t hide it like you have been, please.”

Ezekiel pressed his lips together, contemplating his options if he agreed. Doing so would give Stone a reason to bug him more, but after tonight, he wasn’t sure he could get better on his own. Eventually he nodded.

Stone visibly relaxed, standing up and taking Ezekiel's empty mug from him. “You’re welcome to stay the rest of the night,” Stone offered, walking into his kitchen to deposit the mug in the sink.

“Thanks,” Ezekiel said, yawning. He kicked his shoes off and curled his legs under the blanket by the time Stone walked back into the living room.

Stone looked him over, making sure he had what he needed in the way of blanket and pillow. Intending to go to his own bed, Stone started walking down the hall, but stopped before he completely left the living room, turning partially to look at Ezekiel. He opened his mouth about to say something, then closed it, before actually saying, “G’night.”

Ezekiel may have been tired, but he knew Stone hadn’t been about to say just that. He didn’t have the energy to call him out, though, so he let it slide, nodding at him. Stone took that as his signal to leave.

It didn’t take long for Ezekiel to drift off to a dreamless sleep. His back may have complained the next morning, but he considered sleeping roughly six hours without waking up a win.

---

The climax of dealing with Apep left them all exhausted, some more emotionally done than others. Sure, Stone was glad they all made it out in the end, but he couldn’t help feeling that need to put space between himself and Eve and Flynn again. It was like when he first met Cassandra, where he couldn’t trust her for months, except he’d put his trust in Eve and Flynn already. At least they explained themselves, and it made sense, but that didn’t make the anxiety go away.

It helped they went to work right after they got all the artifacts back in the Library, something to focus on. He figured Ezekiel felt the same way, although probably for different reasons. Seeing Eve demand they do anything to save Flynn hurt enough for him to remember, no doubt Ezekiel was going to have dreams that played on what could’ve happened if they hadn’t intervened in time. The day after they defeated Apep, Stone watched Ezekiel closely as they finished putting the artifacts back in their places in the Library. He seemed tired, like he hadn’t slept well.

Thus, it was logical that he let Ezekiel stay over, since it seemed to help last time. He hadn’t come over since then, mostly because Stone had been gone, training with the Monkey King. He’d be lying if he hadn’t spent more than a few nights wondering if Ezekiel was doing alright.

Cassandra was sitting at a desk, currently switching between a few books, trying to flush out her theory that Einstein Rosen bridges were at work. At the main table, Ezekiel had been intently staring at, and sometimes typing on, his laptop, mainly sifting through the many, many accounts of visions people had been posting. Stone had been reading through one of a few biographies on Nostradamus at another desk, but his running theory that said physician’s spirit was somehow infecting the internet was falling flat.

Deciding his eyes needed a break, he grabbed a pen that had been sitting on the desk and stuck it in the book to hold his place. After a bit of stretching, Stone walked over to Ezekiel, looking at the laptop screen over his shoulder. He glanced up at Cassandra, seeing her still very much absorbed by her reading, then looked back to the screen, hunching over Ezekiel’s shoulder a lot closer than he normally would have. The thief didn’t jump, but he did glace at Stone out of the corner of his eye.

“If you want to come over tonight, you’re more than welcome to,” Stone whispered, not quite into Ezekiel's ear.

Ezekiel kept scrolling a bit more, not really focusing on what he was supposed to be reading as he thought it over. On one hand, Stone asking outright made him immediately want to decline, but Stone’s assumption it might be a rough night was accurate, and he did sleep better at Stone’s place than he had in awhile. “I’ll take you up on that, mate.”

Stone had expected some resistance. “Uh, alright then.” He stood up, giving another glace to the still-reading Cassandra. “I’ll let you get back to your research.”

They all spent another hour researching. Flynn and Eve had disappeared awhile ago...Stone figured they weren’t going to be seen till the morning. Once Cassandra decided she was too tired to do any more, she bid the two good night, then went off to find Jenkins and do the same. Stone finished up the notes he’d been writing. “You ready to head out?” he asked Ezekiel.

Ezekiel had started packing up his laptop as soon as Cassandra had left. “Yeah. We’re getting some form of food, right? ‘Cos I’m starving.”

Stone hadn’t really thought about food, but now that Ezekiel mentioned it, his stomach growled a bit. “Sure, food. Whaddya want?”

Ezekiel scoffed at him, holding a hand to his chest dramatically. “How dare you not know that my answer is, and will forever be to that question, pizza.”

Stone shook his head at him, chuckling as he collected the books he’d been using. “Alrighty then, Pizza Man. There’s a place on the way to my apartment, Mario Brothers. Order us somethin’ from there and we can pick it up.”

Ezekiel whipped his phone out way too eagerly. “Will do. Any preferences? Dislikes?”

Stone stacked up the books to reshelve and picked them up. “I don’t care, do whatever ya want man.”

Ezekiel raised his eyebrows. “Are you sure you want to give me that power?”

Stone shrugged with the books. “You don’t like anchovies, and you’re hungry, so I think I’m safe,” Stone replied with a smirk, walking into the reference shelves. “Once I get these put back up, I’ll be ready to go, so hurry up and order.” He took his time shelving the books, giving Ezekiel extra time to place the order.

The ride to the pizzaria was mostly silent, save for the country radio station Stone had tuned to earlier that morning. Ezekiel, surprisingly, didn't make any comment about the music, or about anything else, until a hot pizza box was in his lap. Stone glanced over at him in the passenger seat while they were stopped at a red light. “Good thing we’re only a couple minutes away, I’d rather not have a drool-flavored pizza.”

Ezekiel rolled his eyes at him playfully. “You're not the one with the heavenly smelling pizza right in front of you, mate.”

“True.” Stone glanced at the light as it turned green and started driving. “That is if you haven’t already eaten it by the time we get home.”

“Hey, the only reason I haven’t got a hot slice of cheesy goodness in my hand right now is out of respect for the interior of your truck,” Ezekiel quipped. “You have no idea how much restraint is going on.”

Stone smiled at the road in front of him. “Glad you intend to keep my seats clean, as long as it means I’ll actually get to eat some of that pizza.”

Within five minutes the boys had settled themselves at the little table next to Stone’s kitchen, devouring the pizza with obnoxious moans of enjoyment. Stone frequented the pizzeria more often than he probably should, but if he trained enough on his own or with Baird, he compensated for it.

Stone had his sleeves rolled up, the arm with the partially gone tattoo holding his slice in front of him. Ezekiel motioned with his own slice at Stone’s arm. “So, how come you didn’t feel the need to tell anyone about that?”

Stone made a point of chewing slower before he answered. “We were a bit busy, don’t ya think?”

Ezekiel shrugged at the poor excuse. “There was time between when you saved Shangri-La and when you used it. Cassandra didn’t wait to tell us about her new and improved gift either.” He took another bite of his pizza, continuing after he swallowed that bite. “I mean I’m not surprised you didn’t. Just kind of a low blow after we had that heart to heart awhile back.”

Stone was suddenly really uncomfortable; Ezekiel had hit the nail on the head without hesitation. “I dunno man. I wasn’t exactly wantin’ what I got. Havin’ magic on my arm felt...wrong...I mean I’ve been adamant about not using magic from the get-go, yet there I was with super powerful stuff.”

“Didn’t want to be seen as a fraud?” Ezekiel suggested, a hint of condescension in his voice.

“Alright, it was a stupid thing to hide, and I should’ve had more faith in my friends. I was fallin’ back into old behavior and didn’t think past the anxiety. You happy now?” Stone snapped, gripping his slice hard enough to flatten the crust between his finger and thumb. He followed Ezekiel’s gaze to his pizza, putting it down on the plate in front of him. “Sorry.” He looked back up to see Ezekiel smiling smugly at him. “What?”

“Oh, just giving you a taste of your own medicine. Not so nice being on the other side when you didn’t initiate it, is it?” Ezekiel replied, raising his eyebrows as he took another bite of his pizza.

Stone sunk back in his chair a bit, basically admitting Ezekiel was right. He decided to change the subject. “How have you been? After Apep and all,” he asked, trying to not seem pressing by focusing on his pizza.

“Fine, mostly. A little lost sleep, but nothing new so far, so that’s a win I guess,” Ezekiel replied, not exactly convincing.

Stone raised an eyebrow at him. “Fine?”

Ezekiel sighed in defeat. “Okay, maybe not so great...and I’m hoping your couch can work its magic and ward away my nightmares.”

“Ya know it’s just better if you tell me the truth instead of making me dig for it,” Stone chided, finishing up his slice.

Ezekiel looked at him while he took a swig from his beer bottle. “You’re the one to talk, mate. Let’s face it, both of us are a long ways off for being proactively open to each other.”

“Doesn’t mean we can’t start bein’ better about it,” Stone said, pointedly looking at Ezekiel.

Ezekiel raised his eyebrows, partially in surprise. “You gotta walk the walk, mate.”

Stone sat up in his chair. “I’m willin’ to if you are. It’s an area we both need to work on.”

Ezekiel thought about it for a moment. It was pretty big commitment to make, but something in the back of his mind told him that it’d help. “Sure, why not.”

For most of the night, the couch did its job, until roughly 4 am. The nightmare he figured was going to happen eventually decided to show up; basically a replay of Flynn with the Eye of Ra on his forehead, except they were ten seconds too late. The black cloud and ley lines sucked into Flynn, the force knocking him off the broken edge of the platform, where the sheer amount of magic in him caused him to explode, just like it had done to human Apep. Seeing Flynn die hurt, of course, but the worst of it was Eve, on her knees at their side of the broken ledge, looking down into the abyss yelling Flynn’s name. Once he woke up from that, he wasn’t going back to sleep anytime soon, so he laid on the couch and browsed the internet on his phone, spending most of the time watching weird videos on Youtube.

Stone walked into the living room a few hours later. “Nightmare?”

Ezekiel looked up from his phone, eyes a bit bleary. “Yeah.”

Stone nodded, not quite awake enough to talk about that yet. Instead he went into the kitchen to make them breakfast. Nothing too fancy, just some eggs, frozen hash browns, toast and jam, and coffee. Ezekiel wandered into the kitchen by the time Stone had finished cooking, pouring himself a mug of coffee and pilfering in Stone’s fridge for milk. Stone plated the food and brought it to the table, putting one in front of Ezekiel and the other where he sat the night before. He returned to the kitchen for utensils and his coffee that had been half drunk as he cooked, then sat down.

Stone waited for the coffee to kick in before he started any conversation. “So...what was the nightmare about?”

Ezekiel glanced up at him from where he'd almost accomplished his task of making it look like there were never any hashbrowns on his plate. While he finished his mouthful of potato, he shoved down the urge to not say much. He did promise to not do that just last night. “New one this time,” Ezekiel said once he swallowed. Stone nodded at him to go on. “Uh, it was very much themed on what happened a couple of days ago, particularly focusing on the ‘what if we had been too late’ scenario.”

“Oh,” Stone said He knew he should say more than that, but nothing very useful came to him. “How bad was it?”

Ezekiel shrugged, not bothering to stifle a yawn. “Well, since the actual defeating of Apep wasn’t exactly graphic, the dream wasn’t either. It was more the concept of Flynn being dead, and Eve sobbing into the chasm that ruined any chance of sleep for me.”

Stone nodded, drinking some coffee. “Well, my couch is always open if you ever need it.”

A smirk appeared on Ezekiel’s face, contrasting the dark circles under his eyes. “What if you bring a lady home?”

“Nothin’ much like that happenin’ for me lately,” Stone said, shaking his head with a faint smile. “Besides you gettin’ sleep is more important than hookin’ up with someone.”

Ezekiel’s eyes went wide; he was not expecting such an honest response. “Uh, thanks, mate,” he stammered, going back to finishing the rest of the food on his plate.  

---

A couple months passed since Stone’s open invitation to Ezekiel. He’d taken him up on it several times, and for the most part, Stone’s magical couch let him have some quality sleep. At first Ezekiel felt weird, going home with him, talking about whatever was bothering him, but they both couldn’t deny that Ezekiel was loads better after he’d slept well. Something about having Stone nearby, knowing he was safe, put him at ease.

Stone got good enough at reading Ezekiel that the thief didn’t even have to ask if he could come over. He kept it very casual and inconspicuous, simply waiting for the others to leave so no one saw them leave together. Stone did his best to keep Ezekiel relaxed and focused on anything else then why he was staying over, going so far as to buying a PS4 just so he and Ezekiel could play games together. Stone’s apartment became a haven of sorts for him.

So the first time Stone walked in on him crying post dream, he didn’t feel nearly as embarrassed about it as he would’ve a few months before. Stone had gotten up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and for whatever reason, felt the need to check on Ezekiel before he went back to sleep. He didn’t say anything, he just sat next to Ezekiel and let him cry on his shoulder. Ezekiel eventually fell asleep, and Stone had apparently covered him back up with the blanket before he went back to bed. They didn’t talk much about it the next morning besides Stone saying “I’m here for ya whenever ya need it,” but knowing Stone didn’t think any differently of him was a relief.

---

It had been a week since he had slept at Stone’s place, and he was really feeling it. When Cassandra asked him if he was feeling okay, he figured it was a sign he probably should go home with Stone. He camped out in the Annex, waiting for him, doing “work” on his laptop while Cassandra and Jenkins did actually productive things at the main table and in Jenkins’s lab.

Stone had spent the afternoon training with Eve. He walked into the Annex showered, but still with a post-workout glow about him. Ezekiel looked up at him as soon as he entered. It took only a second for Stone to see the silent question in his eyes. He had intended to head home early, cook himself a good meal, and take it easy, but he knew that Cassandra was going to be there for at least another hour, and his stomach would protest waiting that long.

He walked over to Ezekiel, gym bag slung over one shoulder. “I was gonna head out now, but do ya wanna wait?”

Ezekiel looked up at him. “Oh, uh...” He paused to glance at Cassandra and Jenkins busy cataloging items on the main table, then looked back to Stone. He knew how long Stone had been training because he definitely had been watching the clock. “No, we can go.”

Mild surprise appeared on Stone’s face. “You sure?”

Ezekiel gave another glance to the still busy Cassandra and Jenkins. “Yeah. I don’t want to keep you waiting.”

“Alright,” Stone replied, shifting his gym back on his shoulder as Ezekiel stood up and gathered his things. Stone happened to glance in the direction of Cassandra right as she looked up at them.

“Are you guys leaving?” she asked, a quizzical look on her face. Jenkins glanced up for a moment at her question, then went back to work.

“Uh, yeah, well I’m givin’ him a ride home,” Stone stammered, looking to Ezekiel, who nodded in confirmation albeit a bit too enthusiastically.

“Oh, well have a good evening then,” Cassandra said, furrowing her brow a bit at them.

Stone knew that face; Cassandra thought something was odd. To dig himself into a deeper hole, he cleared his throat awkwardly. “Uh, you too, Cass, and you as well, Jenkins.”

Jenkins looked up from his work, not being very subtle with his “something is suspicious” face, and nodded at them. Satisfied they could make their exit, Stone gave a nod to Ezekiel, and the two rather quickly strode out of the Annex.

Stone didn’t say anything until they were in his truck. “Sorry about back there. I didn’t mean to draw attention to us or anythin’.”

Ezekiel shrugged, fiddling with his seatbelt as Stone turned his key in the ignition. “It’s fine. It’s not like we can keep hiding forever.”

“Well, all we did was just give them ideas....but that doesn’t matter right now,” Stone said, diverting himself from giving Ezekiel any more anxiety than he already had. He shifted the gear into drive and started down the road. “I dunno about you, but I’m starvin’. Any ideas for dinner, that aren’t pizza preferably?”

Ezekiel rolled his eyes exaggeratedly. “I do eat more than just pizza...I just happen to make pizza the majority of my diet.”

“Then enlighten me on what makes up the minority,” Stone said, chuckling.

Ezekiel thought for a moment, pushing aside the many still unhealthy meal suggestions that came to mind for something that Stone would approve of. “You need a good post-workout meal. Hmm, how about stuffed peppers?”

Stone thought about it for a moment, then decided the idea sounded good and he didn’t have any other suggestions. “Sure. Need to swing by the grocery store for ingredients then, that alright?”

“As long as it tastes good, I can handle shopping,” Ezekiel replied.

“I should’ve known the way to your heart is through your stomach,” Stone chuckled, glancing briefly over at Ezekiel.

Ezekiel had no clue what Stone meant by that, so he laughed it off. “Heh, you’d think you would’ve learned that by now. Even Jenkins knows my favorite tea,” he said, scratching at his neck nervously.

Stone hadn’t meant to make him uncomfortable, so he focused on driving. “Jenkins knows everyone’s favorite tea, but whatever floats your boat man.” Ezekiel gave him a smug smile, but settled on looking out the window.

Of all the things Ezekiel thought he’d do with Stone, grocery shopping was not on his list. It was weirdly comfortable, wandering around the store together, smelling the bell pepper that Stone held out to him to make sure he approved, obligingly picking out some junk food to not-very-secretly put in the cart just so he could see Stone’s feigned disappointed face.

The most surprising part of the experience was the amount of information Stone knew about cooking. Ezekiel would be lying if he said he didn’t think it was kinda cute to see Stone explain the uses of ingredients they were getting and answer Ezekiel’s questions as they waited in line at check out. He startled himself with that thought. It didn’t help when he caught the elderly lady behind them with an endearing smile on her face, apparently listening to them talk, but before he could explain they weren’t together, it was their turn to put their items on the conveyor belt and pay. He silently thanked several deities when they walked out without the old lady actually saying anything to them.

Stone may had been joking earlier, but Ezekiel decided he should suggest Stone cook more often. He may have made Ezekiel work for his food, cleaning out the peppers while Stone prepared the ground beef, but the stuffed peppers were well worth the work and agonizing thirty minutes in the oven.

“Mmm...how come I didn’t know you could cook?” Ezekiel said, fully enjoying the flavor party happening in his mouth.

Stone chuckled at him, looking quite pleased at Ezekiel enjoying his food. “Never came up. Besides, if everyone knew, I’d have to to cook for them. It’s bad enough you know now. I’m never gonna get rid of ya am I?”

“Amazing food and a magical couch? I should just move in,” Ezekiel joked, not quite realizing what he said for a few seconds. “I mean, uh…”

“Little early in the relationship, don’t ya think?” Stone quipped, then took a drink from his bottle of beer before he said anything more stupid. He cleared his throat, not unlike he did in the Annex earlier, and went back to devouring the food in front of his face. They decided it was best their mouths were occupied with eating.

They ended up playing Rocket League for awhile, spending the evening relaxing in each other’s presence, pointedly ignoring their conversation during dinner. Or at least openly talking about it, that is.

Stone chalked up Ezekiel’s game being a bit off to his lack of sleep lately, but in reality Ezekiel was more than distracted analysing the last couple of months to find signs of Stone doing things that would hint at him wanting something more.

Ezekiel figured Stone was a bit sluggish from his training, but in reality he was contemplating the concept of Ezekiel moving in, what Ezekiel had to have been implying since he lived in a one-bedroom apartment. Night eventually crept up on them, and both were ready to get some sleep.

Something woke Stone up around two in the morning, but he wasn’t sure what at first. He sat up and looked around his dark room. Nothing seemed amiss, so he laid back down, already drifting back to sleep.

“Stonn...noo dnnn.”

Stone sat up at the noise. It had been faint, faint enough that Stone thought he had started dreaming already.

“Stone, plzz...cmm baa.”

He definitely wasn’t dreaming. It sounded like Ezekiel; he must be having a nightmare, Stone figured.

“Connl Baair’, wai’ mmm.”

Stone swung his legs over the side of his bed and got up, groggily shuffling into the living room. Ezekiel was tense, one arm gripping the sofa at a weird angle, the other hidden under the blanket, stress contorting his face into a close-eyed scowl.

“Gotta time i’ righ’,” Ezekiel mumbled, moving his head like he was looking around.

He decided he needed to wake up Ezekiel, and spent a moment thinking about the best way to do that. He knelt down next to the couch so he wouldn’t be looming and freak Ezekiel out even more, and went for the standard light shake of the shoulder. “Ezekiel….hey, Ezekiel,” he said, voice low.

“Mmnnn Stnnn n’t ye’,” Ezekiel groaned, turning his face from the back of the couch towards Stone. He waited a moment, but Ezekiel didn’t wake, still deep in dream.

“Ezekiel, wake up,” Stone said, shaking him again. Ezekiel still didn’t wake up. Switching up his methods, Stone touched his face, definitely only on the theory that the face is more sensitive than the shoulder and would be more likely to wake him up. “Ezekiel.”

This time, his eyes opened with a sharp intake of breath, squinty at first, then wide in terror. Before Stone could pull his hand away, Ezekiel grabbed it with his free hand, keeping it pressed against his face, breathing growing considerably more erratic. Ezekiel started counting in his head, staring at Stone to force the image that had been in his mind to go away. He wasn’t dying, no, he was fine, right in front of him, real as the hand on his face. He vaguely registered that Stone looked concerned and was saying things, but most of his brain power was focused on calming himself down. By the time he got to one hundred and twenty four, Ezekiel’s breathing had slowed to more of a light jog rate.

Stone hadn’t expected him to start hyperventilating, or clamp down on his hand like it was the only thing in the room that was real. He found himself muttering various reassuring phrases like “it’s alright” and “you’re safe” and “I’m alive,” but he doubted Ezekiel actually heard him. Eventually Ezekiel let go of his hand, slowly sitting up on the couch, looking like he just sprinted, but his breathing was considerably better than a couple minutes ago. “You alright?” Stone asked.

Words didn’t want to work for him yet, so Ezekiel just nodded. A random idea popped into his head. He didn’t want to freak out Stone more than he probably just did, but he wasn’t going to be able to go back to sleep on the couch anytime soon. He could always play it off somehow.

Both men opened their mouths to speak. “You were sayin’ my name,” Stone said just as Ezekiel asked, “Can I sleep with you?”

Stone looked at Ezekiel, mouth slightly open, partially from finishing his statement, but mostly from surprise. “Uh, sure,” Stone said before he really thought about it. “Whatever you need man.”

Ezekiel relaxed slightly, but still looked slightly embarrassed. “Thanks.”

After a few long seconds, Stone cleared his throat and stood up, pointing towards the pillow next to Ezekiel so he would bring it with him. He realized he didn’t really think this through when they walked into his room. Being alone, he had no need for a bed bigger than a full; it was going to be tight to fit them both on the bed without ignoring all personal space boundaries. Ezekiel didn’t seem to mind at all;  he walked to the side of the bed and put his pillow down while Stone shifted his over, and proceeded to climb under the covers, staying as close to the edge as he could.

Once both were situated as best as they could manage, silence filled the room once more for a few minutes. “Don’t be afraid to wake me up if ya need to,” Stone said to the ceiling, trying to make Ezekiel feel more comfortable.

“Okay,” Ezekiel replied softly, also at the ceiling. Despite waking up from the nightmare a handful of minutes ago, he was already drifting off to sleep. His last thought was considering the possibility that Stone’s bed had stolen the magical restful properties of the couch.

Stone woke up again sometime later in the early morning. Thankfully, it wasn’t due to Ezekiel having another nightmare. It took a couple seconds to realize that there was a definite pressure on his arm and side. Ezekiel was sort of cuddling his arm, holding onto it like a child holds onto a teddy bear. He was on his side, facing Stone; he could faintly feel Ezekiel’s breath on the side of his head. For a moment Stone thought about how he could extricate his arm, but he couldn’t bring himself to disturb Ezekiel in any way. It was oddly assuring, almost comforting, having Ezekiel holding his arm, like he knew for sure that Ezekiel was sleeping soundly. Stone ended up falling back asleep with a smile on his face.

The next time Stone woke up, it was directly due to the absence of pressure on his arm. The light filtering in through the curtains told him it was sometime in the morning, but before his alarm went off at 7:30am. He turned his head to see where Ezekiel had gone to find that he had just finished releasing Stone’s arm and was in the process of putting a few inches between them. Apparently Ezekiel had been watching Stone to make sure he didn’t wake him up; when Stone looked at him he immediately sped up and attempted to leave the bed in such a way that if Stone hadn’t reflexively grabbed his arm, Ezekiel would’ve ended up on the floor.

Stone released his arm, using the free arm to prop himself up. “It’s fine man. I meant it when I said ‘whatever you need’ ,” he said, voice low and rough from sleep.

Ezekiel, now sitting on the edge of the bed, bit his lip and nodded, willing his face to not go red. Then he stood up, pointedly not looking at Stone. “I’m gonna take a shower,” he declared, then promptly left the room.

Stone watched him go, not sure why Ezekiel seemed so flustered, that is until he thought about not what he said, but how he had said it. He knew exactly how he sounded, and had a good guess how he looked. Though he definitely did feel more for Ezekiel than he had a few months ago, he hadn’t meant to imply anything with the open-ended phrase, at least not after spending most of the night sharing a bed with him.

Stone’s hands found his face as he flopped back onto his pillow. “Ugghnn.”

---

Post Notes: This is the extra fic I ended up writing after finishing up another fic which I’ll be posting in the Flynn lits week. Basically I referenced the events of this fic, and decided I wanted to flush them out more.

Since Ezekiel had no blatant reason to be immune, I decided he’d probably be pretty curious or concerned, thus him attempting to research why in the very beginning. I didn’t give him an answer though because I don’t really know what I think was up in that scenario. The only plausible one is he’s a demigod and that made him immune, but I blatantly refuse to believe Stone was right at all, see my Cizekiel week post for my reasoning on that.

I also wanted to touch a bit on Stone’s abuse, because while it’s clear something happened in his childhood in the episode “And What Lies Beneath the Stones,” there’s been nothing else on it, and I really haven’t thought about it since I last watched that episode either. I’d like to think it would be something they could bond over.