#according to the notes he was apparently in the bathroom and they got bored autographing so they just started doodling all over the posters

[somelazyassartist]

Oh shit I've been out of the TAZ loop for MAYBE two weeks bc I've been temporarily focusing on Dungeon Meshi and in that time nobody told me TAZ Live! in Seattle came out????

[dukereviewsmovies]

Duke Reviews: Iron Man 2

Hello, I'm Andrew Leduc And Welcome To Duke Reviews, Where We Are Continuing Our Look At The Marvel Cinematic Universe...

As We See The First Sequel For Tony Stark, Otherwise Known As Iron Man Called Iron Man 2...

Taking Place 6 Months After The First Film And Before The Events Of The Incredible Hulk, Tony Resists All Phone Calls From The U.S Government...

(Start At 0:45, End At 0:51)

To Hand Over His Iron Man Tech While Also Dealing With His Declining Health From The Arc Reactor In His Chest As The Element That Powers It Is Slowly Killing Him. Meanwhile, Rogue Scientist Ivan Vanko (Played By Mickey Rourke) Has Developed The Same Technology And Built Weapons Of His Own In Order To Pursue A Vendetta Against The Stark Family, Will Tony Get The Government To Back Off And Stop Vanko At The Same Time?

Let's Find Out As We Watch Iron Man 2...

Starting In Russia In The Room Of Anton Vanko Who Watches The Ending Of The First Movie. Calling His Son, Ivan To His Room, Anton Tells Ivan That That Should Be Him And That All He Can Give Him Is His Knowledge Before Anton Dies...

After That We Watch A Montage Of Ivan Making An Arc Reactor Before We Get A Title Card...

6 Months Later, Tony Stark Makes A Fantastic Enterance And A Maaaarvelous Introduction At The Opening Of The Stark Expo Which (According To Psylocke Disguised As A News Reporter) Is Going To Be Going On All Year...

Signing Autographs While We Get A Stan Lee Cameo...

Stan Lee Cameo!

Tony Eventually Makes It Out To His Car Where He's Confronted By A U.S. Marshal (Who Is Actually Sue Storm From Fan4stic) Who Gives Tony A Summons To Appear Before The Senate Armed Services Committee...

Which Actually Should Be Called The Larry Sanders Show...

And The Next Day In Washington D.C., Stark Meets With The Committee, Headed By Larry Sanders Himself, Gary Shandling Who Tries To Get Tony To Turn Over The Iron Man Suit To Hydra...

Oh, I'm Sorry I Meant To Say The American People, (Laughs) Have No Idea Why I Mentioned Hydra, Let's Just Forget I Ever Said It...

Having Their Primary Weapons Contractor, Justin Hammer (Played By Sam Rockwell) Make A Speech Why Tony Being Iron Man Is A Bad Idea, They Soon Have Rhodey (Now Played By Don Cheadle) Enter The Chamber As Over The Past Year Rhodey Has Made A Report On Iron Man...

Having Rhodey Read A Specific Paragraph In His Report (Despite Them Telling Rhodey That He'd Be Testifying In A More Comprehensive And Detailed Manner) He Reads It, However Despite The Senator Telling Rhodey To Stop He Goes On To Read Another Paragraph That Shows The Good Of Tony As Iron Man Than The Bad...

Showing Photos That Show That Enemies Around The World Are Making Manned Copies Of The Iron Man Suit, Tony Soon Shows That All Those Copies Are Years Behind Him And Will Most Likely Never Come To Fruition...

(Start At 3:13, End At 4:39)

Back In Russia, Ivan Starts Production Of His Electric Whips, Which He Manages To Get On-Line...

Meanwhile At Tony's Malibu Home, We Discover That The Arc Reactor That's Keeping Tony Alive Is Apparently Killing Him And Tony's Continuing Use Of The Iron Man Suit Is Accelerating His Condition As Another Palladium Core Has Been Depleted And Despite Running Simulations No Other Element Can Be A Suitable Replacement For The Palladium Core...

With Pepper Coming In To Talk About Buisness, Tony Finds It Completely Boring And Decides To Make Pepper CEO Of The Company. Completely Speechless And Not Knowing What To Say, She Eventually Says Yes...

As Ivan Buys A Ticket To Monaco, Tony Boxes With Happy...

Even Though The Last Time Jon Favreau Was In A Boxing Or Wrestling Ring He Got His Ass Handed To Him And His Girlfriend Broke Up With Him Because He Wouldn't Quit, Even Though He Had Broken Every Single Bone In His Body...

While Pepper Tries To Get Tony To Sign Over His Company While Also Hiring A New Assistant For....Tony....

This Is Natalie Rushman, (Played By Scarlett Johansson) Who Quickly Becomes Tony's Assistant After Kicking Favreau's Ass Again...

Seriously, Jon, How Long Can You Stand In A Ring Without Getting Your Ass Kicked?

And Tony Finds Some Hot Pics Of Natalie That Defiantly Belong In A Victoria's Secret Catalog...

Going To Monaco With Pepper And Natalie For The Monaco Grand Prix, They Run Into Elon Musk And Justin Hammer And His New Squeeze, Christine Everhart...

While In The Bathroom, Tony Decides To Pull A Bruce Wayne In The Dark Knight Returns And Race His Own Racecar During The Race, But Unbeknownst To Tony, Ivan Vanko Is There And He Is Out On The Race Track With The Intent To Kill Tony...

Knocking Tony's Race Car Off The Road, Vanko Tries To Kill Tony Despite Tony Trying To Fight Him Even Without His Suit But When Happy And Pepper Arrive, They Give Tony His Mark 5 Suit So He Can Fight Vanko...

Going To Prison To Talk With Vanko, He Tells Tony That He Comes From A Family Of Butchers And Thieves And That His Father Is The Only Reason That He's Alive, Saying That If You Can Make God Bleed, Then People Will Cease To Believe In Him...

After Tony Leaves, Vanko Gets Dinner Along With A Note That Tells Him To Enjoy The Potatoes Only To Discover That The Potatoes Are An Explosive Device...

Killing Some Guy The Guards Placed In His Cell That Looks Like Him, Ivan Sets Up The Explosive Device And Walks Out Of His Cell As It Blows Up...

Getting Grabbed By 2 Guards, They End Up Taking Ivan To Justin Hammer, Who Busted Ivan Out Of Jail Because He Liked What He Did To Tony And He Wants To Be His Benefactor To Which Ivan Accepts...

Back At Tony's Malibu Home, The News Is All Over The Monaco Incident, And It's Gotten So Bad That Rhodey Has To Tell Tony To Get On This Or Else The Army Is Going To Take Tony's Suits Whether He Likes It Or Not...

However, Noticing That His Friend Is Not Doing So Well, Tony Eventually Tells Rhodey What's Going On With Him, Which Leads Rhodey To Worry About Him Saying That He May Like Lone Gunslinger Thing But He Doesn't Have To Do This Alone, But Tony Just Tells Rhodey To Trust Him And That He Knows What He's Doing...

Meanwhile At Hammer Industries, Hammer Shows Ivan Where He'll Be Working While Also Showing Him His Own Brand Of Iron Man Suits That He Wants Ivan's Help With Stating That He Wants To Make Iron Man Look Like An Antique Which Ivan Tells Him That He Can Make That Happen

Later That Night, Tony Prepares For His Birthday Party With Natalie As Tony Asks Her That If She Knew That This Was The Last Birthday She Was Ever Going To Have, How Would She Celebrate It And Natalie Tells Him That She Would Do Whatever The Hell She Wanted Whomever She Wanted...

And Boy, Is She Going To Regret That!

Tony Gets In His Iron Man Suit And Gets Stonefaced Drunk To The Point It Takes Rhodey In The Mark 2 To Stop Tony...

(Start At 0:46, End At 3:29)

Well, At Least All Life Didn't Stop Instantaneously And Every Molecule In Their Bodies Didn't Explode At The Speed Of Light...

With Rhodey Flying Away With The Mark 2 And Placing It In The Military's Hands, Tony Goes Out For Doughnuts Only To Have A Conversation With Nick Fury (Played By Samuel L. Jackson) Who Reveals That Natalie Rushman Is Really Natasha Romanov Otherwise Known As The Black Widow, Who Gives Tony Some Lithium Dioxide To Take The Edge Off While He Finds A Way To Fix The Problem...

Telling Fury That He's Gone Through Every Element To Try To Replace The Palladium But None Are Feisable, Fury Tells Tony That He's Wrong And He Hasn't Tried Everything...

Meanwhile At Hammer Industries, Hammer Sees How Ivan Is Doing On His Iron Man Suits Only To Discover That He Has Turned Hammer's Suits Into Drones. Not Happy About This, All Hammer Tells Him That They Better Be Impressive....

Returning To His Mansion With Fury, Natasha And Coulson, Fury Tells Stark That The Arc Reactor Is Based On Unfinished Technology That His Father Said Was The Stepping Stone To Something Greater And Something So Big It Was Going To Make The Nuclear Reactor Look Like A AAA Battery...

(Start At 1:15, End At 3:32)

With Fury And Romanov Leaving Tony With Coulson And A Box That's Been In Their Custody For Ages, Tony Figures What The Hell And Gets To Work As The Military Gets Justin Hammer To Update The Mark 2 With His Weapons...

Back At His Malibu Mansion, Tony Watches A Film Reel Of His Father That Looks More Like Howard Stark's Funniest Home Videos At First But Then It's Soon Revealed To Be A Secret Message To Tony...

(Start At 2:13, End At 2:59)

Visiting Pepper At Stark Industries, Tony Tries To Tell Her Everything Even The Point That Natalie Is A Spy (To Which She Tells Tony To Drop Dead In Russian) But Pepper Just Doesn't Want To Hear It From Tony Anymore To The Point That She Goes Back To Work...

But Before Tony Leaves, He Looks At His Father's Model Of The Original 66 Stark Expo And On It, It's Enscribed That The Key To The Future Is Here, Which Has Tony Thinking That Whatever His Father Left For Him Has To Be In The Model So, Tony Decides To Take The Entire Model Back To The Mansion, So J.A.R.V.I.S. Can Make A 3D Model Of It...

Flipping It Upward We See That The Model Looks Like An Arc Reactor, Getting Rid Of Nearly Everything On The 3D Model Except For The Pavilions Which He Uses As Protons And Neurons As The Framework To Discover The New Element...

J.A.R.V.I.S. Tells Tony That The New Element Will Make A Viable Replacement For Palladium If Synthesized, So, Tony Gets Back Into Construction Mode In Order To Do So

With Coulson On His Way To New Mexico For The End Credits Scene, Tony Gets To Work On Synthesizing The New Element And Succeeds With The Reactor Accepting The New Element...

Back At Hammer Industries, Ivan Gets To Work On Some New Electric Whips As Hammer Calls Him To Say That Larry Sanders Wants To Pop By To See The Drones But Telling Hammer That The Drones Won't Be Ready By The Time They Arrive, Hammer And His Men Pay Ivan A Visit...

As Hammer Says That He's Going To The Stark Expo And When He Gets Back They're Going To Renegotiate Their Deal And If He Doesn't Make Good On It, He's A Dead Man. Leaving Ivan With 2 Guards, He Takes Care Of Them Before Calling Tony...

Tony Tries Tracing The Call But Ivan Hangs Up Before The Trace Can Be Completed. Believing That Hammer Might Be Involved With Vanko, Tony Puts In The New Arc Reactor And Tells J.A.R.V.I.S. To Put A New Suit Together...

That Night At The Stark Expo...

Honestly, If Justin Hammer Was Going To Come Out To Music Why Wasn't It This Music?

Anyway, Justin Hammer Begins His Presentation By Introducing The Hammer Drones...

(Start At 1:32, End At 3:20)

But Before Hammer Can Finish What He Was Saying, Tony Arrives In His Brand New Mark 6 Armor To Tell Rhodey That Vanko's Alive And He Believes Hammer Is In Cahoots With Him, But Before Rhodey Can Do Anything His Suit Locks Up And The Drones Go On-Line And Start Attacking Not Just Tony But Everyone Else...

Tony Tries Hacking Into Rhodey's Shot But He's Unable To And So Is Hammer, Who Is Attempting To Get The Drones Back On Line As Pepper And Natasha Arrive To Figure Out What's Going On But Not Wanting To Tell Them, Natasha Puts Hammer In An Arm Hold Which Makes Him Tell Everything...

Tony Dodges Rhodey And The Drones Attacks While Natasha Goes With Happy To Hammer HQ To Deal With Vanko...

Eventually We Get A Scene Where Tony Saves A Young Boy In An Iron Man Mask (That's Supposed To Be A Young Peter Parker) From A Hammer Drone...

Yeah, This Is One Theory I Don't Buy Even Though Marvel Confirmed This Because The Age That This Kid Is Now And The Age Peter Is In Civil War Don't Seem To Add Up To Me....

Tony Continues To Dodge Attacks From Rhodey And The Drones As Natasha Arrives With Happy At Hammer HQ...

(Start At 1:19, End At 3:19)

When Natasha Eventually Arrives At Vanko's Room, She Finds Him Gone Which Gives Natasha An Opportunity To Both Shut Down The Drones And Get Rhodey Back On-Line To Which She Succeeded At That...

(Start At 1:31, End At 4:38)

With Hammer Arrested, Vanko Arrives In A Brand New Suit And Starts To Give Both Tony And Rhodey Trouble Eventually Leaving Them With Only One Option Left And That's Crossing The Streams...

(Imitating Bill Murray In Ghostbusters) I Love This Plan!, I'm Excited To Be Apart Of It!, Let's Do It!

With Vanko Near Death, He Sets His Suit And All The Drones To Self Destruct, Knowing That Pepper Is Near One Of The Drones Tony Races Off To Save Her...

Saving Pepper In The Nick Of Time, She's Not Exactly Happy To See Tony Saying That She Can't Handle The Pressure Anymore To The Point That She Quits Her Job, Understanding Why Tony Accepts And Kisses Her...

The Next Day, Fury Has A Meeting With Tony To Show Him Romanov's Assessment Of Him For The Avengers Initiative To Which She Decides That Iron Man Should Be Involved But Tony Stark Shouldn't. This Leads Fury To Decides To Use Stark As A Consultant...

Refusing At First Because Fury Can't Afford Him, Tony Says He'll Do It On One Condition And That's That Larry Sanders Gives Him Their Medals In Washington That They've Earned For Saving Everyone And He Makes It Happen...

In The End Scene For This Movie, We See Coulson Arrive In New Mexico Where He Makes A Phone Call To (Maybe) Nick Fury To Tell Him That They've Found It Only For The Camera To Zoom Out To Show Us Thor's Hammer...

This Movie...Is Okay..

It Has It's Good Moments And It's Bad Moments, I Love The Fight Scenes In This Movie, The Stuff Between Tony And Nick Fury Is Interesting Along With Most Of The Story Where The Rest Is Just Okay Or Groan Worthy And To Tell You The Truth I Can And I Can't See Why People Hated The Movie So Much, Yeah, It's Iron Man Against Another Guy In A Suit Of Armor But So What? The Scene Was Awesome And I Really Liked It, The Story Doesn't Go Anywhere? Bullshit, It Doesn't!, Black Widow Was A Wasted Character? Yeah, Kind Of But In A Movie About Iron Man, You Can't Make It Completely About Her And Not Focus On Iron Man, Some Complaints May Be Stupid And Others May Be Right But Either Way I Still Love Watching This Movie And I Say See It...

Till Next Time, This Is Duke, Signing Off...