#about to sign the lease for this apartment... 1 month and i've got my own place

[mothkisserx]

[dicaeopolis]

oh i am feeling VERY broke rn but god i am free.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for kicking my brother out?

Long story short, last year I (24) got my own apartment, it's literally only a 1 bedroom; I got it myself without a cosigner, I paid an entire year of rent up front, and I paid a triple deposit because it's my first lease anywhere, and I've never asked anybody to help me pay any of the bills, I even moved all my furniture in completely by myself without help from anybody including my mom or her stinky husband (32, ew) or my brother (19)

I lived here by myself for about 4 months when my brother and my mom's stinky husband got into a fight

(it was Stinkys fault, he was starting shit with all my moms kids and my brother was just the only one aggressive enough to put him in the hospital like he deserved, but my mom defended him and lied to the court so he wouldn't be deported, he's her only source of income atm because of her disability)

anyways, my brother went to juvie for a few months and the courts say he and Stinky can't live in the same house together anymore, since this happened a few days after he graduated high school, they decided to not try him like an adult for the sentence, BUT if he breaks the restraining order, he will be tried like an adult; so my mom asked if my brother could live with me for a few DAYS so she could get her own place, for her and her kids (including the brother STILL IN MY HOUSE), and divorce Stinky-mcgee

I agreed to do it under the radar because I would have to pay a huge fee to add him to my lease, but it's against my lease to have him here this long without adding him...and my apts are trying to rebrand as "luxury" to raise rent, so they're kicking people out left and right for very minor offenses like smoking cigarettes indoors or hanging clothes on their balcony, things TECHNICALLY against the lease but REALLY stupid. (and charging new people more than what the people being kicked out were paying)

they will 100% evict me if I don't pay to add him to my lease if they find out, so I can't even call the maintenance man (he's a snitch, he already snitched on me for having more pets than I said I did). So I can't get my AC fixed and its 110°F outside rn...if I get evicted, I don't have any savings and I will be homeless, BUT ANYWAYS

it's been 7months, and my mom hasn't even LOOKED for an apartment,

my brother has 3 jobs and a car, but instead of looking for an apartment he spends all his money on his girlfriend (20), and video games, and shoes (I get that he's still a teen, so he wants teen things), but he won't even pay for the grocery bill if I ask (I only ask for groceries, the CHEAPEST bill, since I work with food, I rarely eat at home anyways, so it's mostly HIS groceries) and he always says he doesn't have enough money

I am at my fuckin limit tbh,

but I'm not sure if he could get an apt the same way I did with his conviction history (he's been to juvie like 6 times for different things), and my mom has been evicted so many times for fighting people that I doubt she could co sign if they look into her renters history; and my older brother (27) won't co sign or take him in because he says my brother isn't reliable enough, and he doesn't want to take the financial hit if my brother gets arrested again and can't pay rent... (the other kids are still school age, so they don't count)

he's old enough to go to a shelter, but we use to live in a shelter for YEARS after a tornado took out our house and our dad, and he took it the hardest, so I think living in a shelter might be a trigger for him(?)...so I kinda feel bad for suggesting it(?)

WIBTA if i just packed his shit, put it in his car, and told him to go to either his girlfriends house or a shelter?

(I kinda feel shitty for even thinking of it tbh)

What are these acronyms?

[philipkindreddickhead]

A while back I lived with someone and having years between then and now I've had some time to reflect on the relationship. We started out as roommates. Shortly after we moved in together they confessed they were interested in me and I, rather stupidly, agreed to be with them. It was ill-advised and very short. In that time we had sex. They came inside of me without asking first. I was not on birth control. They explained very quickly that they did not believe they had semen in their fluid. That it was just like vaginal fluid. That they always came inside their last girlfriend and SHE never got pregnant. They were not diagnosed as infertile. They did not know if their last girlfriend was infertile. I shrugged it off because I didnt know what else to do. Getting mad couldnt make them not come inside me. They thanked me for trusting them so implicitly which made me turn sour. I didnt have a choice but to trust them. They robbed me of that choice. I didnt know better enough to say anything like "hey have you actually been diagnosed with having vaginal fluid instead of seminal fluid?" I could only trust that they knew more about their body than I did.

I broke up with them shortly after although not for the sex. Honestly there were so many reasons why but the catalyst was that they were poly with our other roommate who shared with me that they had led her to believe the two of them would be more exclusive when they moved to my city. That it sucked for her to see the two of us together but that she didnt want us to break up because of her. I wasnt sure was else to do with that information. I hardly wanted to potentially cause problems with BOTH of my roommates over a relationship that was mildly unsatisfying. I didnt tell them the truth about why we broke up. I dont remember what reason I gave. I only didnt want to ruin their relationship by saying "hey x told me she didnt really want to be poly" They didnt stop pestering me for a long time about why we broke up and trying to argue with me about why we should be together.

Later they lived with me while someone else paid their rent. They told me they had no where to go because they realized they werent attracted to their non-binary-femme male bodied partner. I was the only one who said it wasnt fair of their partner to pressure them into sex to validate the femme identity. I paid all their food and all other expenses. I even offered to help them get a job which they refused for a long time because they didnt want to work for a corporation. I was dating someone new and they kept asking me if my boyfriend wanted to fuck them. If he wanted a threesome. Eventually I snapped and asked them why they cared. If they were a lesbian (as they described themselves) why did they want to know so badly if my boyfriend wanted to fuck them. When we broke up they started asking me if I wanted to have casual sex. I said Id have to think about it because I wasnt prepared to say "no" I did like them as a person at the time. (Sometimes I still do) I just wasnt emotionally available. But eventually I just outright told them no because they would. Not. Stop. Asking. Everyday theyd be like "hey have you thought about it yet?"

Eventually I ran out of money and couldnt support them anymore. The lease was almost up too meaning theyd have to start paying their own rent. They had a job at that time, after finally caving and taking the job at my workplace, but they still owed rent to a previous apartment complex. I gave them I think either a month or two months notice that they needed to find somewhere else to live if they couldnt come up with even 1 months rent to prove they could be responsible enough to sign onto the lease with me. They went around calling me a bitch to all their friends telling everyone that they were getting kicked out. I guess its hard to e-beg if you cant paint yourself as a victim.

They came to visit me and this time they had huge cosmetically enhanced breasts. I should say they had breasts before. They always said they were natural but anymore I dont know. They could have been from synthetic hormones. I wouldnt have known better. They explained that all they wanted was to have breasts more natural to their body size. The breasts were bigger than my head despite her not being much bigger than me. It was deeply confusing because we'd often had intelligent discussions about cosmetic surgery being detrimental to women's collective health.

One of our last arguments was over the word queer. They called me an assimilationist because I objected to it. That I didnt "get" queerness. I just remembered being so irritated. This was a person who admitted to me theyd been raised to talk to women, be in relationships with women, sexually persue women. But because they didnt do so until they presented as a woman they argued they must be a "lesbian." Nevermind they were currently fucking a whole cis man. Nevermind they began presenting as female-and therefore persuing women- in high school at a more age appropriate time. But I was less deserving to be in the lgbt community because I didnt "get" queerness according to someone who was born I guess attracted to both sexes, raised with opposite sex attraction being the goal, and constantly talked about how opposite sex attracted they were. (Just for clarity's sake Im not saying Im more bisexual than they are, or doubting their bisexuality. )