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90363462 · 2 years ago

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I've Got 12 Random Sex Items You'll Wish You Knew About Sooner

When's the last time you went online sex shopping?

Shellie R. Warren

Oct. 15, 2021 05:42PM EST

You know what? Sometimes, you've got to push a few coins aside and determine in your mind that you're going to invest into your sex life (if you had a sex jar, this would be easier to do, by the way. You can read more about what that is all about here). If you're someone who is totally down to do that, but you don't have a clue where to begin, boy have you come to the right place! Between the joy of being a writer who sometimes gets samples sent to me, the constant research that I do for the couples I work with and having folks shout-out certain items semi-often, I've compiled a list of 12 sex-related items that may seem random AF (a pun is kind of intended there) and, at the same time, can make sex so much better between you and your partner. Where's your pad at? You're definitely gonna wanna take note.

1. Jenga PDF Sexy Couples - Erotic Adult Party Game for Adventurous Couples

Something that's cool about sex games is they can help to bring some laughter and lightness into the atmosphere. While having that kind of goal might seem odd on the onset, it's always important to remember that sex doesn't have to be sober-minded and serious. It's actually supposed to be a lot of fun! So, if you want to bring some extra light-hearted-with-a-touch-of-horny foreplay into your space, this is a PDF that you can purchase and immediately download with instructions, including numbers to put on your Jenga pieces and naughty questions that you can ask your partner. (It's on Etsy. You can cop it here.)

2. Melting Rose Petals

If there's one thing that can hinder a lot of us from going all out when it comes to "setting the stage" for a romantic evening, it's the thought of how much clean up will be required on the back end (sigh). That's a part of the reason why this particular item caught my eye.

If you and yours adore nothing more than soaking in the tub together, rose petals can definitely help to cultivate the right mood. The dope thing about these, in particular, is they slowly melt into your bathwater while leaving a smell of fresh stems. This means no worry about having to scoop petals up when you're done. Excellent.

(Pink Cherry is the site that sells them. Go here to buy a batch.)

3. Earthly Body Edible Massage Candle

What I personally like about this product is it combines the soft glow of a candle with the convenience of a massage oil that you can easily lick off — a win all the way around, y'all! What makes this edible massage candle even better is it's vegan-friendly, has apricot and coconut oil in it (which makes it nourishing for your skin) and it comes in three different flavors — strawberry, watermelon and vanilla. Since it's a 4 oz. candle, it should last you, shoot, at least a couple of rounds, right? Here's hoping. (Adam & Eve has got you on this one. Get it here.)

4. Edible Candy Lingerie Gift Set

There are times when, while I'm perusing the internet, I'll see something that is simply cute. That's how I felt when I noticed what looked like a string bikini set (top and bottom) that's made out of edible candy. Pretty sure there's no need to break this one's possibilities all the way down, right? Anyway, Walmart sells both pieces at a reasonable price. You can check it out here.

5. Sensuva Ice Cube Flavoured Cooling Nipple Balm

For some, nipples are a peak erogenous zone. For others, not so much (check out "So, What If 'Typical Erogenous Zones' Annoy TF Outta You?"). That said, whether you are trying to experience (or experience more) nipple orgasmsor you're with someone who is a "breast person" and you want to learn how to enjoy getting aroused in that area more, something that could help you out is nipple balm. This particular kind will help to harden your nipples while providing a cooling sensation. Plus, the chocolate mint flavor will definitely help to put an even bigger smile on your partner's face. Lovehoney carries it. Get it here.

6. System Jo H2O Flavored Lubricant Collection

The wetter, the better, right (check out "The Wetter, The Better: 10 Creative Ways To Use Lubricant")? Yeah, my sentiments exactly. Flavored lubricant can be a lot of fun, especially when it comes to oral sex, because it provides a way for you to do what you're doing while enjoying a flavor that you really like. Something that I dig about this brand is it's got a ton of different flavors to choose from including Cherry Burst, Cotton Candy, Green Apple, Peachy Lips, Juicy Pineapple and so many others (the company boasts of a whopping 17!). Dear Lady is a site that has a good amount of different ones (go here). Yet if you want to go to the System Jo H2O site to see what other merchants carry this product, you can do that by goinghere.

7. Like A Virgin Tightening Pleasure Gel

So, before we even get into this one, check out an article that I wrote on this topic last spring entitled, "What Science Says About A So-Called 'Loose Vagina'". The bottom line is your vagina doesn't "overstretch" from sex (remember, we can push babies out through there!). So, more than anything, the name of this product is probably more of a marketing ploy than anything else. Still, it gets a shout-out here because it creates a tingling feeling as it helps the muscles within your vaginal walls to slightly contract (in the best way possible), of course. Restoring you to virgin status is pushing it yet providing a nice sensation during intercourse is something that it certainly can do. (Another Adam & Eve gem. Cop it here.)

8. GLYDE Organic Flavored Condoms

There's no way around the fact that the best way to proactively prevent contracting an STD or an unplanned pregnancy is to use a condom (check out "10 Things You Should DEFINITELY Know About Condoms" and "10 Ways To Make Using A Condom So Much More Pleasurable"). Here's the thing, though — a lot of people seem to forget (or is it blatantly ignore?) that you can get a sexually transmitted disease or infection from oral sex too. This is where flavored condoms come in and if you're not in an exclusive relationship where both of you get tested regularly, you should definitely have a box of these in your stash.

What I like about this brand is 1) the condoms are organic; 2) they are ethically made; 3) they're made out of latex and are ultra-thin (which your partner will definitely appreciate) and 4) they come in a variety of flavors. In fact, I recommend getting a variety pack (vanilla, strawberry, licorice, wildberry and blueberry) to see how you like 'em.

GLYDE is the company. The page for the variety pack is located here.

9. High on Love Chocolate Body Paint

Have you always been curious about whether or not weed ultimately makes sex better? If so, check out "7 Proven Ways Weed Makes Sex So Much Better". After doing that, getting yourself some chocolate body paint (the kind that has hemp seed oil in it) just may pique your interest. Some perks about this particular brand of body paint is it's water-based (so it won't jack up your sheets), it smells and tastes like chocolate and, since hemp seeds are full of protein and amino acids that can help to boost your energy levels, at the very least, you'll be in for a night of sensual experimentation and longevity. (EdenFantasyssells it. Get it here.)

10. We-Vibe Melt App Controlled Rechargeable Clitoral Stimulator

A couple of years ago, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, "How To Experience Amazing Foreplay (When You and Yours Are Apart)". The main reason why is because statistics show that at least 14-15 million people within the United States alone are currently in a long-distance relationship. If you happen to be one of them, hey, I don't have to tell you how challenging it can be when it comes to "scratching that itch", each and every time the mood hits. A work-around that can at least help things to become more bearable is a clitoral stimulator.

What intrigues me about this one is it comes with 12 different sensations, is waterproof and USB-rechargeable and you and your partner can connect it to an app so that he can help to get you off (yes, literally) no matter where he may be. The main hack to keep in mind is this one works best with some water-based lube. And while it's not the cheapest thing on the block (it currently retails for around $150), can you really put a price tag on consistent sexual pleasure? I mean, relatively-speaking? #wink (Get this at Lovehoney. Find it here.)

11. Wonderful Honey

Something that I kept hearing about the past few months, to the point where I did some investigating with some of the men in my world, is Wonderful Honey. Word on the street is it's a natural way to increase testosterone levels and build stamina and endurance. Each shipment contains 12 packets at 15 grams a pop. Like I said, men are huge fans. Couldn't hurt, right? (Medallion Mercantile is just one site that sells it. Check it out here.)

12. Dripstick

I don't think there's a better way to round up this sex-themed shopping list than to share with you something that I think every woman should own.

It's called a Dripstick and it's currently the only stick on the market that is able to remove excess fluid from your vagina following sexual activity. It's medical grade (a sponge is what you'll be using). The packaging is solid. It's also really easy to use (instructions are here).

So, if wet spots irk you, you and your partner like quickies but you hate the after-romp clean-up or there's some other reason why you've always wondered why something like this doesn't exist — Merry Christmas (LOL). It finally does. Awkward Essentials is the company. Get yourself at least one 20-pack box here. Enjoy!

Join our xoTribe, an exclusive community dedicated to YOU and your stories and all things xoNecole. Be a part of a growing community of women from all over the world who come together to uplift, inspire, and inform each other on all things related to the glow up.

Featured image by Giphy

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yondzone · 4 years ago

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Bungou stray dogs relationship headcanons

sfw very sligth nsfw

those under 16 please do only read the sfw part

↰ 𓂃 ⌲ ⌂.

⋆ ☄.⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠂* ; ☔

𝕱𝖎𝖔𝖉𝖔𝖗 𝕯𝖔𝖘𝖙𝖔ï𝖊𝖛𝖘𝖐𝖎

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ If you managed to have your way to his heat, then you are definitely one special fellow to him, so only to you and around you he will show is soft persona that he never let anyone see in decade.

⌗ If you end up living together, the little time he his at home he will he bring your breakfast at bed to make up for the fact that he his basically never here.

⌗ He prefer kissing you on the cheek rather than on the lips. And in the morning (if by miracle he didn’t already leave) he’ll automatically kiss you cheek to wake you up. And if he his here before going to sleep he’ll ask for a kiss on the cheek.

⌗ He also like night cuddles (of course he won’t admit it.) he never touched anybody so you give hi this feeling of constant novelty.

⌗ He loves when you are jealous and he is gonna tease you with those word : "you seems jealous, is everything fine ? :)" in fact he hates people but if it means seeing your jealous face he don’t mind playing the womanizer for some minute to just tease you.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗Fyodor is definitely a top this bitch will rather die than being a bottom.

⌗ He know the effect it have on you when he tie his hair up so you can be sure that evrrytime you do the deed he while have is hair up ✨.

⌗ Low key have a master servant kink that get him going for hours.

⌗ Hes not someone very vocal when you both do it.

⌗ He doesn’t look like this but he his really touchy in the bed.

⌗ Bed is his favorite place he is quite traditional in fact he does not want it in other place rather than the bedroom.

⌗ But he lost his traditionalism the day you introduced to him ‘sex toys’ oh so a new way to torture you without killing you? he’ll take this opportunity gladly.

⌗ One day you tried to be on top and your ‘master’ did not like that so he destroyed you for the whole night.

𝕮𝖍𝖚𝖚𝖞𝖆 𝕹𝖆𝖐𝖆𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖆

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Chuuya is very romantic, like very romantic.

⌗ He likes kisses, giving and receiving, he does not have a favorite place to kiss or to be kissed because he loves hems all.

⌗ When he is stressed or tired (or both), he likes to cuddle you, wine and cuddle are his comfort things.

⌗ Speaking of cuddling, he likes to cuddle you while taking a shower (hot water and rose petals) after all he his very comfortable with you and love your presence

⌗ He feels more confident when you compliment him, and he will shamelessly admit it ‘please compliment me more’

⌗ Chuuya is quite jealous and possessive. If someone tries to hit on you or make a move, he will go feral on this person and make sure everyone in the future who you belong too

⌗ A whore for PDA in public, he will always hold your hand or put his arm around you, so that everyone will see that you are taken.

⌗ He won't tell you that he loves you often, because he prefer action out of words. He's the type of person willing to do anything to drown you in gifts and make you happy.

⌗ If you find something nice or cool, he will buy it for you, just to see you smile. Needy Chuuya want to see you smile

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ He his totally a switch, one day he can feel like a total top and the day after will feel the need to be dominated.

⌗ He like being on top yes, but he prefer it when you are riding him he really love seeing you body from below, its exquisite.

⌗ He is an hips man, he love them. So you being on top of him gives him the opportunity to admire and explore your body.

⌗ Chuuya likes your moans very much, he finds them adorable and it shows that you feel good, which makes him happy.

⌗ Chuuya is vocal, way too much vocal in the bed.

⌗ He his considered as the king of aftercare trust me, its heaven.

𝕯𝖆𝖟𝖆𝖎 𝕺𝖘𝖆𝖒𝖚

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Do not lie to yourself, a relationship with Dazai have high chance of ending not well because of some toxicity he may develop as time goes on.

⌗ He his really possesive, once he got you he wont let you go,never ever.

⌗ He love to kiss you. He loves the taste of your lips and the feeling of kissing you makes him feel something he never had.

⌗ In public, dazai will be the dork he his but… in worse. (yes its possible) he will be playful to death with you.

⌗ While when you are alone, he is much more sentimental but he will continue to remain slightly playful.

⌗ He loves teasing you, if he manage to make you blush, it will makes him continue even more because he finds you oh so adorable when you are embarrassed.

⌗ At night, he will cuddle you while holding you tightly, so that you can feel safe and loved.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Dazai doesn't really feel the need to have sex he have better thing to do and never really tough about commitment wit anybody.

⌗ But when it's with you, he will have sex with you after-all all opportunity to your body, he’ll take it.

⌗ Slow and passionate sex over here! He his rarely pn the fast and rough side but if you ask he’ll comply to any of your desire.

⌗ He don't really have favorite position, nor kink except maybe some bondage

⌗ Did I forget that he have a praise kink? Of course receiving and giving,

⌗ Dazai is very vocal, im not talking about moan they are relatively low, but about praise, when you both are doing the deed, praise are overflowing (🦋🦋🦋)

𝕾𝖎𝖌𝖒𝖆

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ Sigma never had anything except his casino which his his whole life so at first when he get implied in a relationship he will be clumsy not knowing how human relation work

⌗ He will need guidance from you, he wont make first move simply because he does not know how it work.

⌗ He his kind, really really kind to you. He view you as something very fragile and it will take time for him to comprehend that you are not weak.

⌗ Because he his always in his casino the only moment you can see him his when he his in his office, he barely goes to sleep too occupied maintaining the casino.

⌗ You finally gave him what he desired : reasons to live, you are very much cherished by him.

⌗ And you also need to cherish him and make him gain confidence in himself.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ He his a bottom he have no social skill and does not know anything about how the society or relationship work as I already said.

⌗ You basically need to do everything and engage everything.

⌗ Your kink are his kink, you’re favorite position is also his favorite.

⌗ The man cry a lot out of pleasure in the bedroom, he his utterly beautiful when he cries.

⌗ As time goes by he will gain in assurance and try to be on top but out of habit he just revert back to being bellow. But please praise him, he tried.

𝕹𝖎𝖈𝖔𝖑𝖆𝖘 𝕲𝖔𝖌𝖔𝖑

▚ 𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ … how did you get yourself into this relationship again?

⌗ do not go out with him I repeat to not go out with him, at home its okay but when in public he start to theatrically declare his love to you, I promise dying would be better than having to support this embarrassment anymore.

⌗ you know that he love asking rhetorical question right? Just let him be, read a book or play on your phone while he monologue

⌗ the number of nickname you have can’t be counted on two hands

⌗ he forces you to call him by nickname and pet name he himself thought of ‘from now on call me the pineapple of your ocean eyes’ …. the fuck is wrong with his brain, where your first tough

⌗ He always kept on repeating that he wanted to be free and first say to you that you should not hope for him to be sweet or be present but every time you come home he his here patiently waiting on the couch.

⌗ his change of persona really surprise you every time they happen, even after years of dating it’s sill hard for you to grasp his true self, a playful sadistic idiot, or a serious full of guilt person aware of his cruel crime.

▚ 𝖓𝖘𝖋𝖜 :

⌗ he his so sadistic, he love to see you cry

⌗ definitely into cosplay and role play in the bedroom ‘today I am the pirate and you my parrot look at those beautiful costume’

⌗ you have an enormous box with all of your disguises

⌗ he have every sex toy possible, may or may not have already bought every sex toy from a store

⌗ usually rough, very rough, and sometime he break the mood with his goofy attitude, he does not mind the mood being broke because he’ll restore it in no time

⌗ they are time he his acting like a narrator as he fuck you ‘then gogol slowly slap her pink ass-’ this is really disturbing

⌗ you can have a little of respite when he decide to have sex with his serious personality respite.

when it happen it’s fast but passionate and stop the joke and the room become silent only filled with both of your moans

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omgbigfluffwriting · 4 years ago

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Let Me Be Myself Chapter 3: Memory Lane

A/N: this was written for @daydreamingatnight209 for Pom’s server swap.

Summary: Spencer and Reader take a trip down memory lane courtesy of their inquisitive kids.

“Hey, Mom, how did you and Dad fall in love?” My daughter asks Y/N. I snort, remembering that it started with a dare. Y/N snorted herself. “Aunt Emily said it was ridiculous.”

I glanced at Y/N, wondering what she was going to say. This was the first time any of our quints had shown any interest in how they came to be. “It started with a dare.” Y/N finally says. “Mine, to be accurate.”

“Yours?” Our daughter echoes in disbelief which makes her siblings start listening in as well. I'm surprised Emily actually said anything on the matter.

“Yes, mine.” Y/N said with a chortle as I remember.

----- Memory Start -----

“Come on, Einstein, it's just a prediction! Most often, they don't come true.” Y/N tried to convince me as I doctored my coffee. I snorted.

“You expect me to walk into there for something I know won't come true?" I hissed. My dearest wish has never happened. I wished last year on my birthday that Y/N would finally see that her current boyfriend was an asshole. “Wow, that's actually a new low for you.” I took a measured sip of my coffee. “Why won't you take Reginald?”

She sighed. “I tried, Spencer. Every time he makes up an excuse as to why we can't go.” I rolled my eyes as I made up my mind to go with her. Reginald's continued excuses are the reason I’m going with her. I’m also her best friend...though I wish I weren't friend-zoned.

“I’ll go but Reginald’s still an asshole.” I said as I added a bit more sugar to my coffee. What can I say, I like it sweet.

“Thank you, Spence!” she exclaimed and kissed me on the cheek. I blushed and thankfully, she didn't notice that my face had gone as red as my cardigan sweater. “I don't know what I would do without you.”

“Let’s hope you never find out.” I muttered before taking another sip. “Is Reginald working late tonight?” Y/N nodded miserably. He was probably cheating on her, the bastard. I’d seen him making out with his current receptionist the other night. “Come over to my place. Let's finish the Tenth Doctor tonight.”

“As much as I would love to, you and I both know he hates our Doctor Who nights.” she replied. I hated knowing that I’d be a healthier choice for her to have a relationship with than Reginald.

“Actually, who names their child Reginald? Even Elton John had the sense to change his name!” I exclaimed as we went out into the bullpen.

"Not everyone is Elton John, Spence." Y/N wearily replies as she sits down at her desk across from mine.

----- Memory End -----

“You had to coerce Dad into going?” Our first daughter asked, bringing me back into the present. Our other kids were laughing uproariously at Y/N’s recount of convincing me. “I thought coercion was wrong.”

“Honey, your mother didn't coerce me. There's actually a difference between coercion and persuading, which you’ll find out the definition of in a few years.” I said, smiling at the memory. “Besides, I got what I wanted in the end.”

"And what was that, Dad?" One of our two boys asked.

"I wanted your mother and by extension, you." I simply said as I squeezed Y/N's hand lightly to let her know I loved her. She gave me a smile and leaned her head into the crook of my neck.

----- Memory Start -----

We walked into the fortune teller’s tent. I was still highly skeptical about it. I still believe that most fortune tellers prey on human emotions, it’s a profiling turned carnival trick and that it’s not adequately rooted in science. She took one look at us, rose to her feet and bluntly asked, “When’s the wedding? You two make a lovely couple.”

Awkwardly I answered, “We’re...not together.”

She smirks at me and says, “Yet. Fate wants you two together.” I blinked in surprise at her declaration that we were supposed to be together.

After telling her that we weren't interested in a full session, we walked out of the tent. Suddenly, “Oh shit, tonight’s date night!” came out of y/n’s mouth. I raise my eyebrows at her. Twice a month, our team held Date Night, which gave established couples a chance to relax and have fun. I always volunteered to babysit Henry and Michael on those nights because I didn't want to see Y/N with Reginald.

The fortune teller came out and said, "Mr. Reid, a quick word before you and your friend leave." I nodded and went back into the tent, while Y/N went shopping since our task was completed. “You need to go to date night tonight. I'm sensing that this is the chance that you've been waiting for all year.” I blinked in surprise again.

“It’s Doctor and how did...” She pointed to my FBI ID Badge. I had forgotten to take it off when we left work.

----- Memory End -----

“But how did you two get together?” our three daughters ask in unison. I laughed. Whenever the kids were inquisitive, they were my kids. “And how did you know this would be your chance to sweep mom off her feet?”

“A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell.” I stated.

“In Dad speak that means you think we're not old enough.” Said our second son. I could see the disappointment on my children's faces. I wasn't going to share everything about what the fortune teller had said to me that day.

“No, it means I haven't told your mother how I knew.” I calmly replied. “And there are some things I would rather keep to myself.”

----- Memory Start -----

I had totally spaced on Date night. I found a sexy number that I had gotten for my birthday and hadn't worn (as Reginald hated it) in the back of my closet. It was a rose-gold colored knee-length bodycon dress that showed a healthy, tasteful amount of my cleavage (which wasn't much, thankfully).

“You are not wearing that tonight.” Reginald said as he walked by my room. I frowned, bristling at the imperious demand.

“I will wear whatever I want.” I replied, deciding on the dress in that instant.

“You look like a skank in that dress.” He said and then left to make his own preparations. I ignored him and put on the dress. The moment he saw me in it, he refused to speak to me. When we got to the bar that the team was at, JJ raised an eyebrow.

“And here I thought Reginald wouldn't let you wear that.” JJ remarked.

“It looks good on you!” Penelope gushed. “Spencer chose well.” I looked at her, shocked. “Wait, you didn’t know Spencer got it for your birthday? He saw it and knew it had to be yours.” I shook my head.

“That's why he refused to put a gift tag on it.” JJ explained. “He knew Reginald would never let you wear it as we all did. How...” I grinned, emboldened by the knowledge that Spencer had gifted me this dress.

“I told him I would wear whatever I wanted.” JJ and Garcia both beamed.

“Good.” both women remarked as they took sips of their drinks. I was drinking a piña colada and despite Reginald being an ass while ignoring me, I was having fun.

He seemed to be getting into an argument with Prentiss and Rossi when I looked for him. I frowned since that likely meant he was drunk. He'd pick a fight with Bigfoot, if Bigfoot existed, while he was drunk. “Where’s Spence?” I asked. After he had finished speaking to the fortune teller alone, I tried to get him to tell me what she’d said and my best friend immediately clammed up.

“He’s here somewhere.” JJ remarked as Reginald came up to us. This surprised me as Spencer preferred sitting for his godsons rather than come to Date Night.

“We’re leaving.” He growled. “Doctor Noodle Boy is here.” Again I bristled, this time for the nickname he gave Spence.

“No, we just got here. If you want to go, go. JJ and Penelope...” I started with tears threatening to fall. Why had I not heeded Spencer's warnings about Reginald?

“I said we're going.” he restated, raising his voice.

“Let me go to the bathroom first.” I said. He nodded and I ran to the bathroom, intending to cry my eyes out but before I got there, I was pulled into a warm, minty embrace. It was Spencer.

“Spence...” I cried into his shirt. He lifts my chin and tenderly wipes away my tears.

“F*** him.” Spencer said. “Leave him and be with me. I don't know when I'll have another chance to convince you.” Spencer murmured before kissing me on the forehead.

On a preserving whim, I decided to leave Reginald. I pulled Spencer's head down, stood on my tiptoes and kissed him just as Reginald stomped towards us. “You wore that for him, didn't you?” Reginald snapped. I gathered my courage which was boosted by Spencer standing behind me.

“We’re over, Reginald.” I said.

“We’re over when I say we're over.” he growled, forcefully grabbing my arm. “We’re going, NOW!” However, Spencer looked at him.

“I’ve been very tolerant of you up until now for Y/N’s sake. Get your hands off her before I break your fingers.” Spencer said coolly.

“Make me, *Pretty Boy*.” Reginald challenged.

“Don’t touch what's no longer yours.” Spencer hissed and broke Reginald’s wrist, ignoring his howl of pain as he escorted me away. I looked back to see cops escorting Reginald outside. When we got back to the dance floor, ironically, ‘You Shouldn't Kiss Me’ was playing. “I knew that dress would look gorgeous on you.” he whispered as he led me onto the dance floor.

We danced to song after song like we were the only two in the room. “I hate to interrupt,” Rossi said coming up to us some hours later. “But the bar’s closing.” Spencer gave me a final twirl.

“Now, how about that Doctor Who marathon?” he murmured. I beamed at him in response and nodded my head. He intertwined his fingers with mine and we walked to his car.

“Thank you.” I murmured, holding onto his hand tightly.

“For what?” Spencer asked.

“For everything. You were right. He was an asshole.” I said, twining my arms around his neck.

----- Memory Start -----

Our kids were laughing uproariously at Reginald’s wrist being broken and my admitting that Daddy was right. “It wasn't that funny.” I mumbled.

“Y/N, you rarely admit you are wrong so yes, it is funny.” Spencer said as I rolled my eyes. I was waiting for the kids’s bedtime to break some welcome news to my husband. I was pregnant again.

“What happened next?” Our kids eagerly asked in unison. Spencer’s lips quirked into a small smile.

“Your mother broke her foot while we were on a case.” he said with a chuckle. “Not to mention the fortune cookies with dinner that same night.”

----- Memory Start -----

I fell down, my gun falling from my hands as I heard a loud crack. I tried getting up but couldn't. Prentiss directed Spencer to carry me before cautiously going into the house. I groaned as Spencer lifted me up, held, and carried me bridal style. “How is it that now we're finally a couple, odd things keep happening?”

“The fortune teller said Fate wanted us together.” Spencer replied as he carried me to an SUV. I groaned at his answer.

“How can you be so...blasé about all of this?!” I exclaimed as he drove to the emergency room. What happened to our man of science?!

“I knew from the moment I met you that you were the woman I’d love for the rest of my life.” My eyes widened. I hadn't expected that answer out of him. “You know, I want kids.” He said as he drove.

“Where did that come from?” I asked. Spencer said nothing. “So do I.” I admit as I keep my eyes on the road to distract me from my pain.

Thanks to my foot being broken, I had to hobble on crutches which meant I couldn't fly. It had something to do with what Spence had done before I was hired, apparently. Prentiss arranged for me to have a ride home with JJ as I lived in the same general area. “Could you drop me off at Spencer's?” I asked, seeing Reginald on my doorstep. JJ nodded and turned around. I slowly made my way up to his apartment after she dropped me off and knocked on the door.

When he answered, he said, “What's wrong?” as he let me in.

“Reginald is waiting for me on my doorstep.” I replied. Spencer made a disgusted noise before kissing my forehead.

“When is that guy going to learn?” He mumbled. Then he brightened. “I was just about to order Chinese, want some?” I nodded in agreement. While we waited for our food, Spencer asked, “Doctor Who or Star Trek?”

“Star Trek.” I said as I realized I didn't have any clothes. Fortunately, Spence was one step ahead and had earlier bought me a change of clothes besides pj’s from the store. He also handed me a hoodie sweater.

“This is yours now, Y/N.” I unfolded the sweater to see that it was his Caltech hoodie. “I figured that bastard wouldn't give up.” he said as we settled down to watch Star Trek Voyager. We only had to pause it once in order to get the food and we ate in companionable silence.

When I took our dishes in, I saw a hastily written note taped on top of a couple fortune cookies. It said, ‘Doctor, these are for you and the Mrs.’

Mine read, ‘A good marriage requires falling in love many times — all with the same person.’ I agreed with the sentiment. Spencer’s read, ‘If I know what love is, it is because of you.’

“That is so true.” he murmured.

----- Memory End -----

“It’s still true.” Spencer replied as he looked at our kids who were making faces at us for kissing.

“Don’t I know it.” I replied. “Not a day goes by without me thanking the Lord that you were there when Reginald tried to force me to go home.”

“Me too.” Spencer said, kissing me on the forehead, like he had been ever since that first night.

“Moom!” Our daughters said, embarrassed. Our sons groaned.

“Our love only grew stronger, Y/N.” my husband reminded me. I smile at the five kids, soon to be six. I couldn't keep quiet any longer.

“Come December, there's going to be a new Reid.” I announced. Spencer’s eyes widened at my news. The kids looked delighted.

“That’s wonderful!” Spencer exclaimed, hugging me. Then in my ear, he whispered, “Remember that time we had to share the same bed on a case?” I chortled.

“How could I forget?” I replied.

----- Memory Start -----

“I'm sharing a room with who, Prentiss?!” I exclaimed in shock. Prentiss had just informed me that I'd be sharing a room with my new boyfriend.

“There aren't enough rooms, so you're rooming with Reid.” Prentiss repeated, “I didn’t expect any protest considering he is your boyfriend.” She shrugged and I followed Spencer to our room. But I received another shock when we entered the room. There was only one bed. Thankfully, there was a couch.

“I’ll take the couch.” I said, not noticing that Spencer was behind me.

“We can share the bed.” he murmured. When I started to protest, he added, “We’re only sharing a bed, it isn’t the end of the world.”

“I thought to save it for my husband.” I absentmindedly said.

“Oh, so you think I won't be your husband? Don't worry, I’ll behave. I'm only joking.” he promised.

“I know you will. I trust you with my life so I can trust you with my virtue. Okay, we can share the bed.” I agreed. He put his arms around me. I leaned into his embrace.

----- Memory End -----

“You were the one that didn't behave.” he reminded me quietly. I grinned, remembering the rest of that night. That had been the night that the quintuplets were conceived.

“You could have said no.” I replied. I felt his chest rumble with laughter.

“I should have made you promise to behave too.” He mumbled. I laughed as he kissed my neck.

“Mom, what happened next?” Our three daughters asked.

“I nearly lost your father.” I said.

----- Memory Start -----

Tears fell down my face. I was pregnant with Spencer's child after two months of marriage and he was in the hospital in Texas with another neck injury, this recent injury courtesy of Reginald. “Hey, you okay?” JJ asked.

“What if he doesn't pull through? I can't do this without him.” I sobbed.

“Do what?” JJ asked again.

“I’m pregnant, JJ.” I said, still sobbing. “I can't raise this kid without him. Diana won't be much help...”

“Y/N, the doctor wants to talk to you.” Emily called out before JJ could say a word of reassurance to me.

Reginald’s bullet narrowly missed Spencer's carotid artery and hit Spencer a few inches below it. I didn't need to worry about him, since he went to prison for assaulting a federal agent. I was told I could visit but was warned to not excite him as he needed to rest. Angry, I went to visit Reginald.

“To what do I owe the pleasure of your company?” Reginald asked smugly.

“Your stunt. You could have killed him, Reginald. If he dies, you better believe I will be pushing for you to go to Death Row.” His eyes widened.

“I only wanted you back,” he explained.

“How does killing the man I lo-” I pause, considering my words carefully. “How does killing the man I love get me back?” I demand. “Let me tell you something, Reginald, if you ever loved me, you will let me go. Never contact me again.” I left after that. I went home, cried, ate ice cream, cried and went to sleep.

Three weeks later, I was beginning to show when Spence woke up. The funny thing was JJ had to drag me to the hospital because I did not want to see him unconscious again.

I entered his room to see him sitting up, animatedly chatting with Luke. Luke smiled and got up. “I’ll just um...” he left.

“Spence...” I breathed in relief and kissed him. “If you ever...”

“I know, I know. You’ll kill me.” he murmured softly. His fingertips brushed the curve of my growing belly. “Are you...” he asked excitedly.

“As of yesterday, ten weeks pregnant.” I answered, just as excited as he was.

“Um, love, you don't look ten weeks pregnant.” Spencer said. “You look thirteen, maybe fourteen weeks pregnant...”

“Shut up.” I muttered.

----- Memory End -----

Our kids were howling with laughter at my telling daddy to shut up. I laughed too because it had been funny.

“I was right after all though.” Spencer said as he held me in bed after we’d gotten the kids to bed. “Five children...”

“I’d never been more terrified in my life than I was at the moment we found out I was pregnant with quintuplets.” I muttered. Well, that was a lie. I had been so petrified at the idea of raising Spencer's child on my own if he died. There was no way I could have raised all five on my own.

----- Memory Start -----

“Ready to see our baby, Einstein?” I asked Spencer the day of my second ultrasound. Spencer smiled at me and nodded as he tenderly tucked a lock of my hair back into place behind my ear. I noticed Spencer’s enlarged eyes and shocked expression first before hearing the doctor’s words.

“That would be babies, Mrs. Reid.” the doctor dryly stated as he looked at the ultrasound screen . Both Spencer and I stared at the screen in shock.

“Babies?!” I repeated dumbly, seeing a pair of fetuses on the screen.

“I was only joking! Do twins even run in your family?” Spencer exclaimed and then asked. In fact, yes, multiples did tend to appear on both sides of my family.

“They do, Spence.” I said softly. “At least they’ll have each other growing up.”

“Looks like quintuplets.” the doctor informed us. Both Spencer and I paled. That meant a high risk pregnancy.

----- Memory End -----

Pulled out of my reminiscing by Spencer's lips on the top of my head, I took a look at the ultrasound photo. “Seven, Einstein. There's possibly twins in here.” I said as I pressed his palm to my still flat stomach.

“I’m glad I accepted your dare, Y/N. Happily married to the woman I love and adore more than my own life with seven kids to boot.” We were both wrong. Later, we would find out, much to JJ’s and Garcia's amused delight, I was pregnant with triplets so we had eight energetic, bright, and happy children.

“Now will you tell me what the fortune teller told you?!” I asked in exasperation. Spencer smiled. “And don't give me that ‘A gentleman never kisses and tells’ shit you gave the kids earlier.”

“She told me that I needed to attend Date Night the night that we got together.” Spencer said, shocking me as he drew patterns on my tummy with the pad of his finger. “Why, do you regr...”

I put a finger to his lips and remarked, “If you love me, Spence... don't ever finish that sentence.”

“Your wish is my command.” Spencer said, kissing me tenderly as one of our babies kicked.

#criminal minds #fanfiction #dr. spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #fluff

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90363462 · 2 years ago

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I've Got 12 Random Sex Items You'll Wish You Knew About Sooner

Shellie R. WarrenOct. 15, 2021 05:42PM EST

1. Jenga PDF Sexy Couples - Erotic Adult Party Game for Adventurous Couples

2. Melting Rose Petals

(Pink Cherry is the site that sells them. Go hereto buy a batch.)

3. Earthly Body Edible Massage Candle

4. Edible Candy Lingerie Gift Set

5. Sensuva Ice Cube Flavoured Cooling Nipple Balm

For some, nipples are a peak erogenous zone. For others, not so much (check out "So, What If 'Typical Erogenous Zones' Annoy TF Outta You?"). That said, whether you are trying to experience (or experience more) nipple orgasms or you're with someone who is a "breast person" and you want to learn how to enjoy getting aroused in that area more, something that could help you out is nipple balm. This particular kind will help to harden your nipples while providing a cooling sensation. Plus, the chocolate mint flavor will definitely help to put an even bigger smile on your partner's face. Lovehoney carries it. Get ithere.

6. System Jo H2O Flavored Lubricant Collection

7. Like A Virgin Tightening Pleasure Gel

8. GLYDE Organic Flavored Condoms

GLYDE is the company. The page for the variety pack is located here.

9. High on Love Chocolate Body Paint

10. We-Vibe Melt App Controlled Rechargeable Clitoral Stimulator

A couple of years ago, I wrote an article for the platform entitled, "How To Experience Amazing Foreplay (When You and Yours Are Apart)". The main reason why is becausestatistics show that at least 14-15 million people within the United States alone are currently in a long-distance relationship. If you happen to be one of them, hey, I don't have to tell you how challenging it can be when it comes to "scratching that itch", each and every time the mood hits. A work-around that can at least help things to become more bearable is a clitoral stimulator.

11. Wonderful Honey

12. Dripstick

I don't think there's a better way to round up this sex-themed shopping list than to share with you something that I think every woman should own.

Featured image by Giphy

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