#ablanc canois

[fantroll-purgatory]

@buttercup-n-stuff

Hey, I’m back with this boy!

Hey! This is mod TR. I like your new sprite! We’re a little bit confused because while it’s true that you waited the month before resubmitted the boy it…doesn’t look like you’ve changed too much about the bio? You’ve even stepped back a few of the things you seemed sure about in the last one. So instead of CD reviewing this again, I’m stepping in to see if I can provide new ideas for you to bounce off the character. Let’s jump in!

World: Beforus

Name: Ablanc Canois

Age: 6.5 or so sweeps

Theme/Story: Weird albino lad that somehow didn’t get murdered as a baby. Lives in caves.

Hmmmm. The thing is, Beforus’s culling system isn’t about killing! It’s about being put forcibly under the care of your “betters” (which is to say, higher blooded trolls). As with CD’s review, I’d also suggest that he’s depigmented instead of albino; this way you can still let him live in the caves and explain away his appearance!

Review Goals: Story, mostly. Really got no idea what to do.

Strife Specibus: Scissors was my last idea, but I may reconsider to something like shovel? idk

I still really like scissorkind from your last one, and since you haven’t explained why you wanted to change it to shovelkind I kinda wanna keep the scissors!

Fetch Modus: uuuuhhhhhhh

When you last submitted Ablanc you said that you wanted something memory-based since you yourself are forgetful, and Ablanc is your trollsona, yes? We could just use Jade’s MEMORY MODUS for that!

Blood Color: Lime! Albino lime, duh.

Lunar Sway: Derse

Title: I think it was page of heart? It’s been a while.

You’re correct! For what it’s worth, I find that it helps to keep a word doc of details for fantrolls I plan to show people repeatedly so that I can remember details like this.

Symbol and Meaning: Cano

Handle: pastelProgramming

Cute! You sure you don’t want to go with pastelProgrammateur, a la CD’s prior suggestion?

Quirk: Absolutely no clue! Hooray!

CD suggested last time that you use **** for “fluff” to reference the fact that he liked fluffy things, but I see that that has since been removed from your bio.

How about;

He ends all his phrases with a semicolon;

Since he’s just learning how to program;

Special Abilities: Can see in the dark, but can’t see very well in light. Squints a lot as a result.

Lusus/Guardian: Last idea was a jadeblood, but that might change if I have a good reason for him to live.

Like I said before, he’s probably alive because Beforus isn’t Alternia! A Jade Custodian would be a very likely assigned guardian for a limeblooded mutant troll.

Interests: Programming, writing, trying to make friends online.

Appearance: See image

Personality: Generally grumpy, tries not to be but always fails. Hard to be around, has an unpleasant personality. Is actually quite soft and likes fluffy things.

Let’s sink our teeth into this part a little deeper. Why is he grumpy? Given that you’ve made him a mutant on Alternia, he’s most likely not given a lot of autonomy! You should think a little bit about how he reacts to that level of control.

Land: Uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh

Once again, I’m going to double down on CD’s rec of Land of Honey and Drops!

I hope this helped with your character, but remember: if you feel like any of our suggestions are missing the point or don’t fit your character, you can feel free to message us about why that is! We’d be happy to work with you to refine him further.

-TR

[fantroll-purgatory]

I’ve been a little afraid to submit this one since it’s my sona and I’m a terribly flawed person but here we go, don’t hold back.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Albino Isn’t A Personality.

You shouldn’t be so self-depreciating! Don’t talk like this about yourself or about your creations. It’s not a good habit for your mental health (or to spout to strangers), as temporarily relieving as it can be. As for your characters- if you know that you’re having a problem with them, try to work on that problem instead of just throwing your hands up like this. You have creative concepts, so I know you can let your character development fly with a little more elbow grease! 

For this reason, I’m going to cut out all your additional self-depreciating jokes! No self-disparaging on this blog! 

World: Honestly? No clue. My memory of Beforus is a little iffy, so I can’t remember if it has/had limebloods.

Beforus does have limebloods! Though they’re called yellowgreens over there. I think we might lean into the beforus thing here just to give you some more wiggle room than being stuck with another Lime Rescued By Jade story. 

Name: Ablanc Canois  Age: 7 Sweeps

Theme/Story: So I kinda just made him albino for fun, because my sign is lime and regular old mutants are boring. I was thinking maybe some overly soft jadeblood hid him until he was old enough to survive deeper underground?

Like I said, I want to shift this more towards a Beforus Story than an Alternian one. I might keep the cave thing, though, and maybe consider the low-light adaptation angle? I Think instead of just being an albino troll, you could go with a Depigmented troll, like the condition arachnids get when they live in caves for extended periods of time but in fast forward. Maybe he was accidentally left in the caverns for longer than intended/got lost and had to survive on his own until eventually being rescued and culled into the hands of a jade when he was a toddler troll? Feral Wolf Child type of troll but with a cave crawler bug instead.  Goals: I’d say the sprite is pretty good for my standards, but I might be completely wrong so you can take a look if you really want. Mostly I just need help with [reworking the personality to make it stronger].

I think your sprite is definitely pretty good! My only recommendation might be changing the outline on the sweater to a lighter gray instead of black, since that makes the sweater detail hard to see. And maybe in inverse of that, turning the hair’s outline black so that it stands out better against the skin. 

Strife Specibus: Scissorkind, don’t ask me why because I have no clue.

Baby Ablanc: [running around the house with scissors]

Their Custodian: no! no!! get back here!! Fetch Modus: Probably something with memory since I’m really forgetful and irony am I right kids

It could be something the jade custodian gave him to try to force him to practice! Or you could do something even more blatant in that regard, like a Manners Modus where the jade custodian tries to get him to Practice Etiquette With His Modus.  Blood Color: Albino Lime, or just lime if you want. Symbol and Meaning: Cano Handle: concernedConfusion (My most common mood)

Relatable! But I think we should tug in the interests you have a little more. Maybe confusedProgrammateur? The latter part is a mashup of Programmer and Amateur, to reflect that he’s very new to the skill but still working on it!  Quirk: Er… I’m not very good at quirks.

You can probably just base what he does around your own habits or quirks! If there’s a particular piece of media you like or something, you could try to theme it around that? Since you like fluffy things, you could also consider adding *** around his sentences to create some Pompoms, For Fluffiness. **his sentences are soft and fluffy just like him*** Special Abilities: Since we don’t really know what limes could do, I’ll skip over that. He can see without any light though.

Limes are said to either have soothing abilities or have powers that let them manipulate the natural world! Like, firebending. Those are just theories, though, and not everyone of every caste has powers, so I think it can definitely slide. The low light conditions are accounted for in the backstory I gave! He can see well in darkvision hours. The tradeoff is that he probably can’t see AS well in the light. Still adjusting even after all these sweeps.  Lusus/Guardian: uuuuuuuuuuuh

Like I said above, Jade Custodian is probably the way to go.  Interests: Oh boy. Writing, drawing, programming, none of which he’s actually very good at. Also likes fluffy things.

Being “good” doesn’t matter as long as you’re enjoying it, that’s what hobbies are for. No Commodification Of Pleasures On This Humble Blog. You should try writing up a Homestuck Intro style introduction for yourself so you can see if you can remember more particular interests to add to the list. What kind of programming do you like in particular? What sort of stories do you like to write/read? Having an interest in writing usually comes from a place of liking a particular genre, right? 

Personality: Acts confused and annoyed by people to make them go away, wants friends but doesn’t think the ones he has actually like him. Very self-deprecating. Is this based too much on me?

It’s a trollsona, that’s what trollsonas are for! But you do gotta remember to try to integrate to the environment. What would you feel like or be like under these new circumstances we’ve imposed?  Lunar Sway: Derse

You need to put more emphasis on dissatisfaction if you want to play up the derse side. What do you want to fight against? What aspects of yourself do you hide or struggle to hide? Remember that the fight can be silly if you want. Is your rebellion against society or against your Troll Mom for not letting you run with scissors? Either one can a dersite make.  Title: Rogue/Page of Heart.

Interesting choices for sure. It’s always hard to classpect for trollsonas since I don’t know you or your Life Arc personally, but I think from this character writeup I might be leaning Page of Heart. You’re in that Potentiality Phase, now, where you’ve got to build up and strength your sense of identity before you can put it to proper work.  Land: You might know by now I suck at land.

How about… the Land of Honey and Drops, a cavernous planet that smells of honey, fragrant and floral and sweet, it is easy to lose yourself here, to walk among the caves forever and to forget who you are. The inhabitants of this planet are kept wandering husks by the perfumed honey and need your help to rally them and help them take back their identities. 

Anyway I’m going to go rethink my life choices. Thanks for tolerating all my requests. You guys are the best.

Don’t rethink your life choices, be excited you sent in a neat character. That’s what we’re here for after all! Thank you for sharing and I hope this all helped!

-CD