#abc give josh a boyfriend challenge

[unkreativstermensch]

Nobody can tell me that Josh Russo wasn’t fully ready to hear the “Am I in love with my best friend” crisis instead of the “my boyfriend used to be engaged to my ex” crisis in that break room.

*gasp* “Another boy???” (read: Eddie???)

And then just fully being there for the tea. And then Gay Guru-ing Buck. Talking about Glee. Making a dramatic exit. I just love him. He might be my favorite.

[oranjis-shipping-mess]

ABC challenge~ Jihan C is for crashing down (What happend? Part 1)

"Can you just let it go for now?" Joshua groans as he's looking for his car keys. "No, Joshua. We are supposed to talk about these things. I don't care that we have a reheasel dinner to go to." Jeonghan follows Joshua around the house. "Well, I care. We can talk about it later." Joshua sighs as he finally finds his car keys. "We're already running late, let's go." Jeonghan rolls his eyes at Joshua's stubbornness, but does follow Joshua to the car, trying to let it go.

The drive is long and quiet. "Joshua, please. Why don't we just talk about it? You know I won't leave you because you slipped once. I just wanna know why you did it." Joshua gives Jeonghan a quick glance, "Jeonghan, fucking let it go already. I was drunk, okay? There is literally no other reason as to why I kissed that guy." Jeonghan frowns, "I don't buy it." Joshua looks at Jeonghan again, "seriously, if you don't leave it alone, you can just go to that dinner alone." Joshua hisses, not focused on the road anymore. "Josh, watch out!" Jeonghan screams, but it was already too late, as their car crashed in to the car in front of them. Joshua hit his head hard against the steering wheel, as Jeonghan hit his head against the dashboard. Both car alarms sounding loud over the road. "Shua?.." Jeonghan groans as he tries to sit up straight. "Joshua, hey.." Jeonghan whispers as he reaches his hand out to pull at Joshua's shoulder, not getting a response. He reaches for his phone but blacks out just before he can call anyone.

"What happend?" Seungcheol asks, worried, as he sits down beside Jeonghan's hospital bed. "We were arguing and Shua wasn't focusing on the road anymore.." Jeonghan says as he reaches for his forehead, which still hurt like crazy. "Where is he?" Seungcheol asked as he had noticed that Joshua wasn't in the same room. "He didn't wake up.. Cheol, this is all my fault.." Jeonghan had started sobbing at this point. Seungcheol toke ahold of Jeonghan's hand, he let out a sigh. Seeing his ex-boyfriend like this did hurt him, but he knew they were both strong and would get through this. "Han, i'm sure Joshua will be just fine. He's strong, he'll get through this." Jeonghan squeezed in Seungcheol's hand, "and i'm sorry for ruining your rehearsal dinner, I guess he is furious.." Seungcheol shakes his head, "he isn't. He totally understands the situation. He's with the guests right now. And hey, the wedding isn't till tomorrow. But I do have to find myself a new best man." Seungcheol chuckles. "No, I'll be there!" Jeonghan quickly sits up, immediatly regretting it as he felt dizzy and his head was pounding like crazy. "Nope, you're not going anywhere. The doctors need to watch you. But it's fine, Hannie." Jeonghan pouts, "i'm the worst fiancé and the worst best friend." Seungcheol carefully pets Jeonghan's shoulder, "you really are not, you know that."

Later that night, Jeonghan had practically begged his doctor to bring him to Joshua's room. After a succesfull begging of 5 minutes, the doctor agreed and put him into a wheelchair, slowly walking him to the room where Joshua was being held in coma. Jeonghan had asked if he could be alone with Joshua for a moment, the doctor agreed, but would be back in 10 minutes.

"Oh, Shua.." Jeonghan whispered, getting a hold of Joshua's hand. It was the first time seeing Joshua after he tried to wake him up in the car. They had put bandages around Joshua's head and there were tubes applied to his arms. "You don't know how sorry I am.. How much I regretted bringing it up again and again, when you clearly stated we would talk later. I am so sorry for making you feel cornered, and sorry for having you lose your focus. I am so sorry for being the worst fiancé ever. You know, when I proposed to you, I made a promise. To be there for you during good and bad times. I was supposed to listen to you, and trust you that you would talk to me later. Which i'm sure you would have done, because it's you, Joshua. You are the most honest, pure person I've ever met in my life. And if you don't come out of this coma, I will never, ever forgive myself for it." Jeonghan sighs, wiping his tears away. "I love you so much, little one. But I really don't deserve you." He continued, pulling his engagement ring from his finger and putting it around Joshua's finger instead. "I don't know if you're ever gonna wake up, but please take good care of that ring.. It was my promise to you."

[jodiwalker]

Don’t Let the Door Hit Ya: A Pre-Hometowns Assessment

I know I've missed a lot here. The last time I checked in with The Bachelorette, Rachel was dating the entire "Hoodies" section of the Urban Outfitters in Times Square, and now her boyfriends couldn’t even make up an intramural basketball team without recruiting someone off of the elliptical machines. I know it doesn’t make any sense to come back in with commentary on what is notoriously the most boring episode of any Bachelorette season—the one right before Hometowns where Rachel cuts every guy she knew she was going to cut from the very moment she met them but kept around because they gave good hugs and always had gum—instead of any single other upcoming episode.

Ahead of us we'll be meeting the families who inspired these bros to seek love and/or protein gummies Instagram sponsorships on television; dropping in on date specifically designed for sex at Chris B. Harrison's invitation; and Rachel wearing a truly bomb ass silver dress in which she will be proposed to shortly before making the much more important decision of either going back to being an attorney and retaining the public's respect and adoration, or becoming the next host of Do You Want to Build a Tiny House Filled With Poltergeists: Weekend Edition? in which case we will turn on her in the swiftest of fashions, despite all the good she's done for our dear, awful, corrupt ABC franchise of choice.

With all that tantalizing drama waiting ahead of us, perhaps I should also briefly glance back at the carnage in the rearview mirror. I nervously avoided the Lee/Kenny drama for weeks, and now that I've watched, it simply must be said…

You guys. The Bachelor isn't racist! We've all been so wrong all along! The Bachelor's contestants may be racist, and the world around it may be racist, but The Bachelor isn't racist. No, no, no. It's just Lee. Lee is the problem! Lee is racist and since The Bachelor chose him and put him on the show, and were aware that his blatant, dangerous, toxic racism was, indeed, racism, they're totally in on it. It's meta!

Not buying it? Okay, watch this—name all the times Lee was racist on this season of The Bachelorette: That time he kept telling Eric he "loved him to death" while demeaning him every chance he got; that time he called Kenny aggressive for (initially) fussing at him calmly about interrupting him with Rachel twice; that time he kept calling Kenny aggressive while openly explaining to the cameras that his main hobby is riling people up and then smiling at them or saying sociopathic shit like "Jesus loves you" or "I'll pray for you"; telling Rachel that he was scared of Kenny; lying to Rachel about Kenny throwing him out of a van or whatever while actively sporting Cameron Diaz's jizz-hair from Something About Mary.

Okay, now name all the times The Bachelor WASN'T racist: that time it picked Rachel, a black woman, as The Bachelorette after 30 seasons of not doing that!

But for real, screw The Bachelorette for giving Lee a platform and putting Kenny in that situation which was, by the way, a storyline they pilfered directly from Unreal season 2—not even the good season! And let it be known that any goodness that comes from this season is a direct result of Rachel and any badness seeps from the pores of this franchise which was one step away from having Lee wear a Confederate flag swimsuit and be all, Whaaaa I'm just proud of my heritage?!

But Rachel, whose only human flaw seems to be that she has absolutely no self-control when it comes to large, statement rings—even when wearing winter gloves!—has somehow managed to live up to our absurdly high expectations. Heading into Hometowns, she has four dudes and what I imagine is a world of emotional trauma that is utterly not worth it lying ahead of her. Let's briefly assess their odds before they take us into their childhood homes and adult male psyches.

Matt (Who?) is only worth noting because of the sobs that overtook Rachel when she told Matt (Who?) she had to send him home. Every season the Bacheor(ette) sends home some man or woman that I while professing them their rock, their best friend, their damn Jiminy Cricket that I have literally never heard of before in my life. [Ed. note: The Bachelorette—the one place in the world the friend zone DOES exist, men. Because this woman IS contractually obligated to date you!] For JoJo, I seem to recall it was Vinny the Barber, who went on to a prosperous life in Paradise where he acquired a much more reasonable hairline. I can only hope the exact same for Matt.

I would wager that Dean is as cute (and tear-inducing) as the kid in the kid in Lion, while simultaneously making me want to put my face on his face as much as the grown-up kid in Lion: my boyfriend Dev Patel. Dean looks like the 26-year-old actor they'd cast to play the high school sophomore having an affair with his AP English teacher on The CW. Indeed, we've got a real Hot Archie on our hands here, and he is going to get his precious, fragile, surprisingly woke heart shattered into a million pieces by our resident Veronica-meets-Josie.

Rachel knows Dean is too young for her. Rachel knows she's not going to marry Dean—how else do you explain his first date being a blimp ride and his second date being…going to Catholic mass? But I think Rachel would be quite pleased to make a man out of Dean in the Fantasy Suite, and also, probably just wants to see if she can make him grow up a little in their time together. Yes, it will be awfully traumatic for him when she breaks up with him very soon after meeting the family that he's so self-conscious about. But one day, he'll look back fondly on Ms. Lindsay and all that she taught him about Fahrenheit 451 and the importance of clitoral stimulation.

Eric's weird. Aside from the initial challenges he faced with Lee and Lee's general dickish-ness, I was pretty bored by him. That probably comes from the fact that he's always seems like he's falling asleep in his interviews and his fashion sense rests somewhere between Season 1 Michael Scott and Blake Shelton on The Voice. But when he's with Rachel, all the sudden he appears to be quite a fun person. Eric has never been in love or brought a girlfriend home, so this all seems very, very real for him—and he will probably be very, very scarred when it all ends.

Peter is highly handsome and seems highly normal; he apparently has access to a unending supply of nice sport coats, and he is really easing into the salt-and-pepper thing nicely. If Rachel chose Peter and married him, I think they would be very happy together and have a lot of beautiful, athletic, well-dressed children who would one day compete on The Bachelor(ette) and talk about how their parents have been married for 35 years. So it's too bad…

Rachel's going to pick Byan because Rachel is absolutely in love with Bryan. I mean, maybe it's not too bad? Maybe Bryan is fine. But this relationship just feels so Andi-and-Josh circa 2014…and we all know how that ended up circa 2016. It could just be that Bryan resembles a cross between Aaron Murray's brother and Aaron Rodgers' brother, but something about Bryan's constant charm and dedication to telling Rachel exactly what she needs to hear feels a little off. Perhaps Bryan is exactly what Rachel needs…or perhaps he has a half-brother named Aaron somewhere and this will all be yet another strike against the good name of chiropractors.

See you in Hometowns—hope everyone was telling the truth about being sure their parents would be cool with them bringing home a black woman even though they've never done it before and that is actual dialog pulled from the year's most acclaimed and terrifying movie about race!

[kbaldwin0609]

‘The Bachelor’ Episode 9 Recap: ‘Why Can’t I Just Have a Normal Relationship?’

Warning: This recap contains spoilers for Episode 9 of The Bachelor.

Welcome to week 9, rose lovers! I’m not gonna lie — it was real hard not to fast-forward past the whole “Andi surprises Nick” garbage and just pretend it never happened, but I persevered, because that’s what professional recappers do. Let’s get through it… together.

“Hey,” blurts Nick, as he awkwardly ushers Andi inside and offers her a drink. (“I think this conversation might call for some whiskey,” says the former Bachelorette, playing her role to a T.) “What the f*** is she doing here?” wonders Nick. Filling time? Giving the guy who edits the promos something to work with? Auditioning to host a new ABC Digital series about speed dating? Who the hell knows. What we do know, however, is that queen Vanessa is not happy.

Don’t worry, honey — that’s the whole point of this show! Come on, Team Bachelor, let’s move things along with the whole “Andi gives Nick advice” thing and finish the rose ceremony that should have happened last week.

The former Bachelorette now lives in New York, apparently, and just wanted to check in on her ex to see how the whole televised wife hunt is going. “It’s been good,” he says. “I have four very smart women, very strong-headed women.” “And they stuck around?” retorts Andi. (Gurl, let she who has not gone to the fantasy suite with Juan Pablo cast the first stone, okay?) As the whiskey starts to seep into his system, Nick gets a little more relaxed, and he starts teasing Andi back. “You dumped me on national television!” he reminds her, as though she could ever forget. “And now you’re going to be dumping 29 girls,” notes Andi. Nick’s response — a mumbled “maybe 30” — just blows Andi’s mind.

That’s right, toots. Nick’s not about to give a chunky Neil Lane diamond to someone he doesn’t really want to marry “just because she’s the last one standing.” (Somewhere, Brad Womack is in a corner, alternately pumping his fist and weeping.) But forget everything Nick just said, because he really does think this is going to work. And that brings us to the REAL reason Andi is here: Payback. Back in 2014, spurned suitor Nick shocked Andi (and thrilled producers) during the After the Final Rose special by putting this non-question to her on live television: “If you weren’t in love with me, I’m just not sure why… like, why you made love with me.” Looks like Andi’s been waiting three long years to get him back for that “below the belt” (no pun intended) comment.

To his credit, Nick doesn’t seem too chastened by this pointed query. Though “as a man” he wants to get down with all the women, as a reality TV veteran he’s not sure it’s the best idea (lest he get put on blast on live TV). Andi counsels him to do it, if he sees “potential” with the woman in question. The meeting ends with the final task on the Nick Viall Image Redemption To-Do List.

Not for nothing, pal, but it appears the “ladies” have just been standing downstairs shivering this whole time.

And we’ve been waiting a week for this damn ceremony. Get a move on! Yeah, yeah, everything’s “amazing,” “special,” “difficult” — we get it. HAND OUT THE ROSES! And the three women heading to the Fantasy Suite are: Raven, Rachel and… Vanessa. Holy crap, rose lovers — it’s over. Corinne’s reign of camera-hogging terror is over!

Heads up, Raquel: Time to whip up a big batch of cheese pasta, because your Corinne is coming home and she’ll have a whole lot of feelings to eat. Despite her defiant head shake, Corinne quickly succumbs to her disappointment and breaks down in tears. “I’m sorry if I ever did anything to make you upset,” she sobs as Nick leads her downstairs. He comforts Corinne as you would a small child, smoothing her hair and smooching her forehead. “You didn’t do anything wrong,” says Nick. “Not a thing.” She doesn’t ask for more of an explanation, and he doesn’t offer one. In perhaps her most mature move of the season, Corinne whimpers a sad but heartfelt “Good luck” before climbing into the Reject Limo.

Girl, who says you can’t? Next time, though, try looking for it somewhere other than national television. I’m almost positive your results will be better. Oh, who am I kidding? We’ll see you in Paradise, honey — and here’s hoping your promise to “never kiss up to a man again in my life” holds true.

Related: ‘The Bachelor’: Nick Viall Explains his Fashion Choices

The next morning, Nick hops a (promotional consideration provided by) Finnair flight to Inari-Saariselka in Lapland, Finland. Here he will romance the final three women among the snow and limited sunlight, in his ongoing search for emotional “clarity.” Raven, you’re up first! And she has two things on her “never have I ever” to-do list: Tell Nick she’s in love with him, and let him know that she’s never had an orgasm. (Though how he doesn’t know this by now, I can’t understand — she’s said it about 12 times in the promos already.)

First up, though, is a helicopter tour of the wintry landscape, and then darts and drinks by the fire at a local pub. Nick and Raven chat about hometowns, familial love, domestic chores — he’ll do the cooking, she’ll fold the laundry — and fantasy suite nerves. In case you missed it the first 19 times…

But now Raven’s feeling optimistic. “Today’s the day!” Let’s hope so, honey.

At dinner, Raven screws up her courage and finally tells Nick and his gigantic turtleneck that she’s never told a man that she loves him. (Her last boyfriend, meanwhile, only said it to her when he was drunk. Man, that guy sounds like a real winner.) “The way that I feel about you, I never felt about him,” says Raven, who gets increasingly emotional as she tries to share her feelings with Nick. “From the very beginning, it was easy for me to see you as a partner… With every step of the way you have made it so easy for me to love you, that I felt I missed an opportunity during hometowns for me to tell you… I do love you.”

Somebody set off the confetti cannons — she did it! And it really did look tough, so good for you, Raven. I’ll admit I almost wanted Nick to pull a Ben Higgins and say it back, just so Raven’s first experience with dropping the l-bomb would be a good one. But the Bachelor knows better, so he just answers with a kiss.

Raven’s work isn’t over yet, though. When Nick whips the Fantasy Suite card out from under his plate, she doesn’t hesitate to accept — but there’s a catch.

“I was not expecting that,” admits Nick, when he learns of Raven’s predicament. But he’s ready to accept the challenge… next week? Alas, yes. Looks like we’ll have to wait for next week’s “three-hour extravaganza” to find out if Nick’s night with Raven earned him a trip to Red Lobster, and to see his dates with Rachel and Vanessa, of course. After that, it’ll be time for the Women Tell All — and the best part of the whole season: bloopers.

And with that, this leg of Nick’s “journey” comes to an abbreviated end. Are you shocked Corinne went home — or that she stayed this long? Is Vanessa really in trouble, or is Team Bachelor just working their editing magic? And how much time do you think they wasted shooting that Rocky 4-style training montage?

Post your thoughts now! And be sure to check out Chris Harrison’s exclusive blog right here. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to send Raven a gift card for The Pleasure Chest.

The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC. Watch clips and full episodes of The Bachelor for free on Yahoo View.

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[oranjis-shipping-mess]

ABC Challenge~ Soonchan S is for Sabotage

What happened before Juvenile/Yield from Chan's POV. ---------------------------------

"Hey bby, you don't have to wait up for me, ya? Dance practice will probably end late." Chan said as he pecked Soonyoung softly on the lips. "I'll wait. I really don't mind." The older spoke, yawning as he tried to sit up straight on the couch. Chan laughed at his boyfriend, "you're so silly.. Well, I gotta go now, before I run late." He finished with one more kiss, leaving the older alone at the appartment.

Chan felt his heart skip a beat when he left the appartment. He had never lied to Soonyoung in their four years together before, he wasn't even completely sure as to why he was doing this, but he couldn't stop himself. He went to the café that the other one had mentioned, and went inside. It wasn't long till he spotted the white haired boy, already sitting at a table.

"So, you are Chan? It's nice to finally meet you." The guy said, as he got up from his seat and greated Chan with a hug. "And you must be Joshua." Chan answered, sitting down across from Joshua. "You look nervous. But you really don't have to be, we talked about this over the phone." Chan nodded slowly, "I know, but I just can't stop thinking about my boyfriend. We've been together for so long now. And I sort of feel like I'm making a mistake.." Chan spoke softly, looking at his hands. "Hey, listen. I understand, this is new for you, yea. But it's never wrong to try and discover what you want. And look at it from the other side, this could really improve your relationship."

Chan and Soonyoung had been in a relationship for four years now, had known each other for way longer then that. One thing was very clear in their relationship: Soonyoung was the top and Chan was the bottom. But Chan wasn't sure anymore, he tried to turn things around, but Soonyoung was always too strong, and it's not like Chan didn't enjoy it, he did, and he loved Soonyoung with all his heart. But he didn't get any pleasure anymore, atleast not enough to give Soonyoung back what he deserved. So he just started saying he was tired, not feeling well, or he would make plans with his friends to stay out late, so Soonyoung would be asleep when he returned home. He felt ashamed, but didn't wanna make Soonyoung feel like he was doing something wrong, or that it was him, that couldn't give Chan the pleasure he needed, or desired. So he wen't online, something he never thought he would do in his life, ever. Yet here he was, sitting across from Joshua, who had found his pleasure in helping other people find out their sexual preferences in bed.

"Chan, I see you thinking. If you really are too umcomfortable with this, you should go home. Go to your boyfriend and forget about this. But if you wanna find out what you want, what you desire, then stay. You know I can help you."

Chan's body felt extremely hot after the several shots they had taken. He felt funny, and didn't feel as guilty anymore, as Joshua had lead him to his appartment. It started with a few sloppy kisses, slowly making their way to Joshua's bedroom. The boy had taste, his room was as fancy as ever, and there was a huge kingsized bed in the middle. Everything was suddenly going at an extremely fast pace. Before Chan could even think things through, clothes were spread all over the room and they were in bed, naked.

Chan was completely out of breath, looking at Joshua, who was wiping sweat from his own forehead. "Wanna go for another round?" He asked, licking his lips, which were still puffy from the kissing. "I- I really shouldn't. I should go home.." Chan said, sitting at the edge of the bed. "How long do people usually make use of your service?" He asked, a bit unsure of his own question. "Hm, that really depends. Sometimes a week is enough, but some people take several months. Sometimes couples come together. So, yaknow. If you want to take your boyfriend with you next time, it's no problem. Just let me know in advance, ya?" Chan shook his head, "no, I won't take him with me. I don't want him to know about this. I need to figure out what I like, and then I will just tell him." Chan put on his clothes again, he felt slightly sick to his stomache, but didn't really know how to handle all of this, even though it was his own choice.

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Never had Chan thought that it would be so addicting to touch another men. To do whatever he wants, no feelings attached. "You know, Chan. As much as I like helping you out like this, don't you think you've figured things out by now? It's been what? Five? Six months? I mean, I don't mind having you stick around for so long. You're handsome, and you sure as hell found your way in bed." Joshua chuckled, "but yaknow. If you still haven't told him, don't you think it's about time?" Chan shook his head, as he rested his head on Joshua's sweaty chest. "This is just okay, for now. He doesn't have to know. That way he doesn't get hurt. I don't want that. " Joshua let out a sigh, "you have said that so many times. I really think it would just be easier to come clean to him about this whole situation. But it's up to you, Chan. Anyways, are we still up for going to that club tonight? First drinks on me." Chan sat up, grabbing his shirt. "Definitly, I'll be there immedeatly after dance practice." Chan said, as he was completely dressed again. "I'll see you tonight, Josh." Joshua waved him goodbye from his bed, feeling once again sattisfied with Chan.