#abby calling me angel is cute BUT SHES MY ANGEL MY BLESSING
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ennabear · 20 days ago
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OH OKAY SO I’M GONNA CRY. SO THATS WHATS GOING ON. AAAAAAAHSHBSWBEHHS I CANT BELIEVE ITS HEREEEEEE!!! BODYGUARD ABBY IM GONNA EAT YOU WHOLE BABYGIRL!!!!! this fic just received a 60 minute standing ovation from ME. can you believe it guys??? the power of ray strikes again (thank god, this fandom would be NOTHING without you)
"God, forbid your hair be in ruin, sweet girl." Abby's wet lips look inviting, especially when she's smirking at you. Delectable, enticing, desired seeping underneath your soul as you try your best to keep them at bay.
"Now that would be positively tragic, wouldn't it? Just a paparazzi's wet dream. Need my hair in ruins for them to get a handsome payday." Abby shakes her head, the budding smile threatening to reveal itself. You can see how it grows, despite the effort she makes to disguise it.
"I think you do enjoy my company. Paid or not, I bring some light into your life." You play with the ends of her hair. The blonde feels a tingle pricking at her skin. She ignores it.
"I can see that smile."
abby anderson call me sweet girl challenge ready set go!!!! hahahah pleaseeee i’d enjoy her company so much!! i’m smiling so hard rn omg… the way you write her is so fucking CUUUUTEEE. she brings all of the light into my life i swear to god… and so do you, raybear, with these absolute lethal masterpieces that you craft for us 🖤🖤 thanks a billion for this mwah mwah mwah i’m gonna smooch you sooooooo hard it breaks my lips
It's these little things Abby remembers, constantly getting her in trouble.
When paparazzi are around, you always accept her hand as she guides you through the swarming crowd. Abby knows you despise it. How inhumane it makes you feel. You feel like an attraction, an object the masses had come to see rather than being viewed as an actual person. In these moments, you cling onto Abby the most. While she's intimidating to all, there leaves a small exception for you, never has she once been anything to you more than just a sweet, gentle giant she wants close to her at all times.
GENTLE GIANT GENTLE GIANT GENTLE GIANT!!!!!!! so unbelievably true… i need her so bad… ngl i would HATE being an actress and you capture this anxiety and overstimulation so well, but would i do it just to have abby as my bodyguard??? well… i’m not saying no…. please i need her to be my bodyguard every day when i get anxious about other strangers walking on the same sidewalk as me….. i need to grab onto her big warm hands…….. mmmmmmh 🍽️
remember when i said some fics deserve to be made into movies??? yeah. yeahhhhhhh HEAVY on this one. (me saying “remember when” as if it wasn’t literally last night 🤦) but SERIOUSLY this is so perfect i can SEE IT PLAY OUT IN MY PEA SIZED BRAIN!!!!!! i’ll never EVER stop singing your praises rayray…. and if you and emi ever wanna cook up a real script… heh… let’s just say…. remiplutenna world domination……
"Please tell me this is the woman I ran into earlier or else I'm going to be even more embarrassed for answering a stranger's phone."
"Well you're in luck."
"Oh thank fuck—" You curse yourself before being so vulgar with someone who you didn't even know. "Sorry! God, this is all my fault. I must have swapped our phones when I picked them up and didn't even realize."
AWWWW THIS IS SO SMART OH EM GEEEE. ACCIDENTALLY SWAPPING PHONES???? AAAAAAAA THATS ADORABLE 😭 abby being in such a rush and a cranky mood that she doesn’t even notice….. real… but i’m swooning i need this to happen to me and her ASAP although my loser ass wouldn’t know how to handle it 🤦 but lemme pretend in the magic of this fic that i would be so chill and cool for a sec 🙂‍↕️
There is a moment, a short one where your eyes go to her chest, the silver barbells constricting against the small fabric, clear as to what lies beneath.
Abby does smirk at that. She's only human.
well yes 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭 and damn i’m only human too, lemme stare at this bitches nipples for a few minutes… i mean… uhhhh…. lemme suck on them???? or ummm wait….. i didn’t mean to say that haha. yeah sorry heh.
i’d let her guard my body any day…. actually, i’d let her do whatever the hell she wants to my body but that’s a conversation for another time.
"Did I do good? You always say you miss stargazing with your brother back home. I know it's not as quiet as the cabin you have, but I thought it would be okay for now."
"The view isn't bad, not one bit." She admits as she lets you rub her abdomen, the goosebumps crawling upon her skin the more Abby lets you touch her as if she's yours to hold. "Lev would like it. I'm convinced the kid likes you more than me now."
LEV MENTION OH SO IM REALLY BAWLING NOW. MY BABYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! i need to go stargazing with her NOWWWWW we’d have such a fun time, me and my nerd ass 🤓 but also i wanna hold her and hug her and kiss her… sigh, domestic abby i need you. rayray try not to make me sob challenge failed 😞
"Abs, look at me." She meets your eyes, away from the constellations in the sky, afraid if she looks for a moment too long she'll be stuck here forever. "Talk to me, m'right here, not going anywhere unless you want me to."
Instantly, Abby grips your hips, keeping you in your place.
"No, that's not-"
"What?"
"I'm not what you want. I'm surely not what anyone needs. Hell, l've only been with one woman which is deemed to be for not being enough, right? I'm the girl who came out too late, who doesn't have enough experience but because I'm built like some fucking adonis I need to know whatever the fuck I'm doing but I don't. I never know what l'm doing. The only thing I know how to do is protect you, that's all I'm good for and I'm not gonna screw that up just because-”
"Because what?" Your pelvis is on top of hers, your face coming closer to Abby's, watching as you are irrevocably close to her, closer than you've ever been, wet lips ghosting over her pouty pink lips. Abby doesn't even know when you moved, how you got so close, too lost in her own head to register your movements.
NOOOO ABIGAIL ANDERSON DONT SAY THATTTT MY HEART IS SHATTERING 😭 please my baby has too much anxiety… she just needs me to hold her and kiss her and protect her for once…. SHES WHAT I NEEDDDDDD i would gladly be scared and lost and confused by her side 🖤🖤🖤 my sweet sweet baby who i love so much…. who i wanna kiss….. among other things….
"It's not something I'm proud of and I never wanted you to see me differently but l'm not ashamed anymore though. I'm not that person anymore. I haven't been since I met you." Abby falls silent, her cheeks turning crimson before she can try to hide it "You not knowing how I was, it's just the humbling I needed. Not to mention you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen — you still are— but you had a girlfriend so I kept my feelings silent. Something just felt different with you and then you were single and I was afraid of you."
"Why?"
"Because I didn't want to ruin you so l made a promise to myself. I would never start anything with you, not unless I was in love with you."
"You love me?"
I LOVE YOU SOOOOO MUCH, ABBYYYYYYYY 😭 GET THAT INTO YOUR THICK SKULL ONE WAY OR ANOTHER!!!!! AND GOD RAYRAY PLEASEEEEE CAN I CATCH A BREAK FROM THIS SWEET FLUFF BEFORE MY ROOM FLOODS FROM ALL OF THESE GOD DAMN TEARS??????????? the way you write dialogue is sooooo cute and so incredibly realistic 😭 my poor babygirl is oblivious and she needs me to repair her heart (which i’d GLADLY do.)
Like honey to a bee, there's nothing that's ever been so sweet.
This is all you need.
"Abby?"
"Yeah, angel?"
"Let's get out of here."
DA PERFECT ENDINGGGGG YUPPPPP!!!! I NEED TO KITH HER NOWWWW!!!!!!! I NEED HER PRETTY SOFT LIPS ON MINEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! SUCH POETRY RAYBABY IM BEGGING ON MY KNEES FOR YOU TO WRITE A BOOK PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEEEUHHHH!!!!
i love u so much sweetiebear rayray and i love everything you cook for us although sometimes it’s deadly (like right now, my heart can’t take this)… i’m actually biting my metaphorical tongue so hard rn (get it, cause i type with my fingers on here, and not my mouth??? hahahah) to keep myself from getting sappy cause i always do and then i feel like a fucking ding dong after 😭😭😭 but i am so proud of you and this banger nonetheless, and i’m adding this (along with the rest of your masterlist) to my list of amazing fics i need to re-read :33 mwah mwah MWAH!!!!!
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≛ LONELY IS THE MUSE!
❝ ABBY!CENTRIC ONE SHOT ❞
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feat. bodyguard!abby x famous actor!reader
warnings. eighteen+, suggestive nsfw content: reader fell first nd and abby fell harder, some angst, fluff, slightly coded fem reader, personal trainer!abby, just two idiots pining. i saw the discourse for some romance and i wanted to do my part. enjoy friends.
LONELY IS THE MUSE, entangled in an endless web of a high profile life, everyone waiting on you hand and foot, hollywood’s star in their prime — everyone needing a piece for themselves. yet the mysterious blonde who has not a clue to who you are catches the eye of the lonely muse.
wc. 8k
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“You know you don’t have to stand this close to me.” Abby counters, but her words didn’t make you move an inch. Not that she really thought they would. Secretly, she enjoys your gentle touch. She likes how comfortable you feel around her. The downpour in New York has your arm entangled with her own, your hand gripping her bicep as she holds the umbrella.
“Maybe, but I don’t want to ruin my hair.” You replied gently, as you rested your head against her relaxed bicep.
“God, forbid your hair be in ruin, sweet girl.” Abby’s wet lips look inviting, especially when she’s smirking at you. Delectable, enticing, desired seeping underneath your soul as you try your best to keep them at bay. 
“Now that would be positively tragic, wouldn’t it? Just a paparazzi’s wet dream. Need my hair in ruins for them to get a handsome payday.” Abby shakes her head, the budding smile threatening to reveal itself. You can see how it grows, despite the effort she makes to disguise it. 
“I think you do enjoy my company. Paid or not, I bring some light into your life.” You play with the ends of her hair. The blonde feels a tingle pricking at her skin. She ignores it. 
“I can see that smile.” 
Better than anyone, Abby knows the gleam in your eyes is too dangerous to entertain, so she looks forward. It’s what she's paid to do, to keep you safe. Not to entertain some weird crush that will soon pass when you move on to the next actress, artist, or producer. She doesn’t need a reminder of how different your world is, she’s already abundantly clear on where the both of you stand. Worlds apart from each other, even if you’re leaning against her, the greedy hands of the public grab onto you first, mercilessly sucking the life out of anyone who enters your life. 
All it does is isolate you, making your life incredibly lonely. Trapped on the throne you built with your raw talent, but the industry is a double edged sword, as much as it appears to lift you up, it impales any sense of normalcy at a private, peaceful life. You take pride in these little moments you have with her. It’s the only time you get to have a taste of normalcy, even if you did have a bodyguard, which wasn’t entirely normal. Yet, Abby is a gentle reminder of a life she wishes to have. Someone who is kind, and loving; a soul that exists for no selfish gain, greed, or selfishness. 
Sometimes, you take advantage of it. 
Abby knows you crave physical affection. Ever since your messy break up, you’ve been finding any little excuse to justify it. Abby didn’t really mind at all. Even if she tried to deny it in her head, she’d miss it if you stopped. The incessant need you have to be close to her at all times, your essence bleeding on to her, suffocating her with everything she wants, but knows she can’t ever let herself dip into the deepest edges of you. 
Especially, not when you are still attempting to decode the wreckage of your last relationship. 
Abby hates seeing you like this, but she knew there was little she could do to help. All she could do is let you ride the wave of heartbreak, take in the silent tears hitting full cheeks, and hope it would all end soon for you. For now, she would allow immediate proximity.
You’re hurting. You need it.  
The first few weeks, even a couple months after, she expects it. Now it’s month four, and you were still touching her all the time. Lame excuses falling from your lips daily and Abby was sure you didn’t even believe them. She thought about bringing it up to you, establishing healthy boundaries before she crosses a line.
Yet, it feels…nice.
It felt good to be needed. The reason she had taken this job in the first place. It wasn’t what she had imagined for herself – a bodyguard of a famous musician. She jokes about it now, but it's a twisted fate for the two of you. Your eyes shine bright whenever someone asks, and you always take the lead.
Abby has always been more reserved, and your personality is as bright as the sun. She liked Abby the second she laid eyes on her. Not because she was beautiful or the most gorgeous human she’d ever seen.
Which she is.
No.
Her stupid pounding heart, the one she felt beating violently out of her chest, loves you, has no idea who she is.  She had thought possibly the blonde stranger was putting on a front, some did. They liked to conceal their intentions behind greedy eyes and malicious intent.
But Abby turned out to be different.
When a blossoming friendship turned into a job opportunity, it took Abby through a loop. It was the very last thing she was expecting from you. You’d kept her in the dark and when you announced exactly who you were, Abby really didn’t know. Never was she really a fan of social media, didn’t really partake in it unless someone was showing her the latest trend going around. She’s a little old fashioned but she likes it. It worked in her favor when it came to you. Unknowingly, for the first time since your fame struck as quick as lightning, you had the pleasure to befriend someone who had no idea who you were. 
As fresh as breathing your first breath of air, you took pride in the circumstance. Someone enjoying your company for who they are and not just for your social standing, fame, or most importantly the money. Before either of you could really even fully come to it, Abby has become such an influential person in your life, and then you were attempting to entice her with a job opportunity, and she accepted. 
You thought it would take longer and knew from the moment you had asked. But her life was uprooted by you, and she felt guilty about how much it fills her up with glee. 
In the last year, Abby became the only person worthy of your trust, the only one who would keep your confessions confined, not letting the secrets drip like cheap wine down the drain. Rather more as if she was out in the vineyard, carefully hand picking the grapes for the wine as she crafts it herself. Giving it the love, care, and attention it needs to flourish into fine beverage. From one sip alone, knowing she would crave for the taste. 
Getting to know you in ways some would dream of. Often, the mass of the public did, but you’re more selective who you let in your life now. Swiftly, you noticed how easily Abby listened. 
Listening and seeing you for who you are, not some strewed version the media made you out to be.  
She understood why you felt the need to and maybe why you felt comfortable with her. You spent time with her more than anyone. After two years together, she had learned every little detail about you. Where you liked to get your morning coffee, your favorite brunch spot, which bar you like to frequent when you had a night to give, which gym was your favorite, and to not speak with you until you’ve had said coffee. 
It’s these little things Abby remembers, constantly getting her in trouble.
When paparazzi are around, you always accept her hand as she guides you through the swarming crowd. Abby knows you despise it. How inhumane it makes you feel. You feel like an attraction, an object the masses had come to see rather than being viewed as an actual person. In these moments, you cling onto Abby the most. While she’s intimidating to all, there leaves a small exception for you, never has she once been anything to you more than just a sweet, gentle giant she wants close to her at all times. 
Her stature is standing a little over six feet tall. Her arms always looked too good against the tight fabric of her shirt. The one you grip onto as she is navigating through a crowd with you in tow, she’s always focused. The remainder of your team was behind you, while she was always in front of you.
At all times, protecting you.
But it was moments like today, you were grateful for. You blended with the hectic life of the city. You were just two people waiting at a crosswalk, waiting to get to your next destination.
Abby tries not to pay too much attention to how you’re squeezing her bicep, with a strong grip further indication you weren’t letting go anytime soon.
She supposes it’s better than feeling your hand in hers. There were times when Abby deemed it necessary. She would grab it whenever she needed to get you through from point a to point b, quickly. It made you follow her pace instead of lingering behind. She didn’t even know how she was supposed to feel with your head resting against her arm, your body so close to hers.
How was she supposed to act normally?
The rumors were already getting bad. You denied them when asked, and you did gracefully each time.
All Abby could think about if this moment was captured, it would be perceived as intimate. It felt like it was, but she didn’t want the entire world to see. Not when she felt the two of you walking this very nimble line of friends, something professional, and something more. She didn’t need thousands of eyes giving their two senses in a situation she didn’t even fully understand yet. All it took was one person to snap a photo if she gets too close to you. If her touch stayed on you for too long, or if she let the love reach her eyes. The ladder was the most difficult to control. It’s a part of her just as much as the air in her lungs.
This life is new to her. At times, Abby wondered if she’s biting off more than she could chew.
The only reason she’d left was for you. She had a small, quiet life. Abby’s life was very average, a cloud of normalcy hovered above her before the two of you met. A personal trainer full time and she resided in a cabin about half an hour from where she worked. She chopped wood to relieve stress, Her girlfriend liked it at the time, and she did too. She had her two dogs, and a darling kitten. 
She enjoyed the privacy. The isolated countryside her sweet family could reside in. Abby had built this life she was proud of, and it made her happy. For a time, it worked. She was genuinely content with where she was. There wasn’t a need to stress or control where her life was going. It felt like a huge relief. She tended to live inside her own head, not be present in what she has right in front her.
It had been months since she felt like that. It’d felt good and she was proud of herself for not succumbing from within and really coming to terms with what she had built around her. This was the most difficult route for her to take. To allow herself to be open, even if there was a chance of her falling.
Abby really should have felt remorseful for leaving it all behind.
Nora was sweet. The most caring partner she ever had, but there wasn’t much she could compare it to. Besides her, there had only been two, and she didn’t even count Owen. A long misstep until she landed where she needed to be. He did care for her, and he seemed to be more kind-hearted than most men, but the bar was set so low, he should’ve exceeded expectations.
And he did, in some areas.
Others, he fell more than flat but there was little to nothing he could do about it. Abby likes girls and he wasn’t one. Her sexuality shattered their relationship into a million pieces – leaving neither of them any option but to move on.
Nora felt real. This genuine connection she’d never experienced before. Abby knew it one year into their relationship. The pair had built this life together, one where she didn’t feel trapped in, and one Abby could be proud of. She felt acknowledged and loved Nora. There wasn’t a sliver of a doubt in her mind this where she needed to be.
She tells Nora when she needs space, and she isn’t ashamed of it. If she didn’t want to go out, Nora wouldn’t guilt trip her into it. Abby didn’t feel pressured to intertwine her identity with Nora just because they were together. Nora hardly ever gave Abby a reason to be upset. She showed up like partners were supposed to, even when Abby didn’t.
But it was a heavy weight to carry for Nora. Being her first serious queer relationship, Abby was left stunted in areas where Nora had to lend a helping hand. She never made Abby feel bad about it, but the two of them could feel the string keeping them threatening to snap.
Often, it frustrated Abby. To always be the one receiving help and never giving it. She didn't blame her partner, but she was left at a crossroad. 
She never understood Owen more and it really pissed her off.
To no fucking end.
But Nora was far more patient than Abby had ever shown. Maybe it was the testament to love or maybe Nora was just a good person and Abby is shitty. She had more patience than Mother Thersea herself, and it amazed her. Always guiding Abby with a gentle hand, never getting upset with her even when she let her anger shine through.
It makes her feel undeserving of a love she could never earn.
This pure and untainted love had never touched her before, and she’d never fallen this hard. Abby didn’t want to be anywhere but here. She really thought this could be it. Nora could be the one. They could get through those hardships together, right? 
Then you came and overwhelmed her like a tsunami.
She was running late, which was completely out of the ordinary for Abby. Instead of her neat braid, her sun kissed-blonde hair was in a low bun. Underneath her eyes was evidence of her lack of sleep. She hadn’t been getting any as of lately and the bags only seemed to get deeper.
Abby wouldn’t call the fights constant, but it sure did feel like it.
The back and forth, having the same fight consistently. Abby was more than frustrated. The biggest efforts she made were dismissed by Nora, even making her upset at times. She was trying too hard and being annoying, or not doing enough and then it meant she wasn’t present in the relationship.
Abby felt her stuck at a wall, Nora on the other side of it and she couldn’t hear a damn thing.
So, she was running late.
One of the many fights  they’ve had with each other as of late. Nora is tired of dealing with a “baby gay” as she likes to remind her in the heat of their arguments. Abby gets offended, her lips forming into an even deeper pout, her porcelain skin flushed in anger before she gives them both space. 
Contemplating about the future of their relationship in the shower, causing her to be late to work in the process. 
Astronomically behind – her client arrived at the gym she worked at half an hour ago. The most recent argument with Nora plagued her morning. All they seem to do is argue, trapped in what they both need from the relationship, but all the two of them could do is argue, argue, argue.
But neither of them makes a move. They are still as the eerie silence that carries them into questioning. 
It’s when she’s too inside her head, fearing about the future, when she violently bumps into you. Body colliding with yours, Abby’s stone-like build causes you to crash into the pavement, your belongings scatter along with Abby’s. 
“Fuck. Are you alright? Sorry, I’m in such a hurry, I’m sure I wasn’t even paying attention.” You let her pick you from the ground, she does with ease. She looks right through you and you expect the excitement, the excited tears, or to be asked for a picture but it never comes.   
“For a moment I thought I ran into a wall—” You giggle to yourself. “Really, I’m alright.” You spoke softly. You pick up both of your belongings that had slipped from both of your grips, returning it to its owner. 
“Are you sure you’re okay? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Abby asks again. 
You think it’s cute how much lace of concern is conveyed in her cerulean eyes, full of light and wonder, so beautiful it stops you in your tracks. 
“No no! I’m fine! Really don’t worry about it.” 
Honestly, you’re still in amazement she has no idea who you are. It makes your fondness of her grow even more. The two of you depart quickly, go about your day, and you think nothing of it until you go to unlock your phone to message your manager and it’s not a picture of the moon you’d taken during the eclipse, it’s the mysteriously hot and kind woman you’d run into before. 
Shit. She has my phone. 
Lucky for you, Abby was coming to the same realization. Ready to bring out the workout she had planned out for her first client, opening her phone to access where she had written everything out only to find this isn’t her phone. Well, fuck. 
Abby hollers at Dina to take over the client for a moment, excusing herself for a moment before retreating into the office to call from her direct line. 
Idiot Anderson. Now you get to make an idiot of yourself, twice. 
Way to go. 
She calls her phone and it rings a few times before the familiar voice chimes through the speaker, the one she heard this morning during her fit of anxiety. 
“Please tell me this is the woman I ran into earlier or else I’m going to be even more embarrassed for answering a stranger's phone.” 
“Well you’re in luck.” 
“Oh thank fuck—” You curse yourself before being so vulgar with someone who you didn’t even know. “Sorry! God, this is all my fault. I must have swapped our phones when I picked them up and didn’t even realize.” 
“It’s okay, really, if I was paying attention where I was walking this morning it never would have happened. Did you wanna meet?” 
“No! Let me. Please, this is all my fault. I should at least be the one who makes the drive.” 
“Are you sure? It’s really no trouble. I don’t mind.” 
“I’m really sure.” 
Abby offers the address of work, thinking once after she does if it’s a good idea, a total stranger knowing where she works but she’s already giving the street name and suite number before she can even make her mind. Abby usually doesn’t get nervous but this situation has sent her into a frenzy, thinking about how dumb she could have been. Nora will get a good laugh out of it she thinks, then she is reminded of the fight the two of them were still in. She wonders if she’s even tried to reach out to her yet or if Nora’s just waiting until Abby’s anger rolls over. 
More favorably, the ladder. 
Until the two of them have the comfort of their lives, the cushion they have between their shared friends and the home they share twenty minutes out of the state, until it comes up again and they’ll be contemplating it all over again. Anxiously, the front desk girl, Bevs, the younger girl who has a crush on her, shyly comes up to her. 
Bevs says what she assumes is your name, confusing Abby in the process. 
“You know her?” 
“How could you not? She’s one of the most famous actresses ever.” Abby is stunned to say the least. Truthfully, she had no idea. Her lack of social media keeps her out of the loop and as much as her friends tease her about, if Abby knew who you were the first time around, she’s sure she wouldn’t have been able to say more than two words. Clearly, you’re a fresh face to her. Already, Abby knows Manny is going to have a field day when Bevs lets this information spill in her sheer excitement. 
Great, she thinks. 
“Oh.” 
“I put her in your office. Some of the clients were already starting to have questioning looks, putting the pieces together. Hey! Maybe they're as clueless as you.” 
“Bevs, go back to the front desk.” With a curt nod and realizing she has pushed too far, with a tail between her legs she retreats back to her post. 
Okay, Anderson, let’s get this over with. 
Abby smells you the minute she steps foot in her office. It’s not the usual pinewood scent the candle in her office radiates. There’s a lingering smell of lavender with just a hit of vanilla. It’s sweet as it engulfs her nostrils, she finds herself sniffling slightly, a silent beg for more of it. You’re standing the minute you’re aware of her presence. Painfully, Abby is aware of her lack of clothing. The tight sport jacket is left unopened, her black sweatpants, accompanied with her sports bra, abs on display as she watches your eyes examine her carefully. 
She’s not sure how to feel about it. 
There is a moment, a short one where your eyes go to her chest, the silver barbells constricting against the small fabric, clear as to what lies beneath. 
Abby does smirk at that. She’s only human. 
You keep staring at her for a minute longer, well it feels like one but Abby deems it couldn’t have been more than a few seconds. “Sorry to keep you waiting.” 
“It’s really not a problem.” The more time goes on, the sweeter you are. “It’s pretty close to where I live.” 
Abby didn’t know it then but you were lying straight through your teeth. The trainer didn’t know you moved around your entire day to make the phone swap or the butterflies swarming your stomach from just how attractive and nice she seemed to be. There was something about her that sent your caution flying to the wind, drifting in the leaves with the rest of your pride. 
“Well I appreciate you coming out this way, even if it’s in your area. I really wouldn’t have minded taking the drive.” Abby pulls out your phone as she hands you yours. It’s simple, transactional, and it should have just been left at that but you had a fondness of putting your foot in your mouth. 
“Are you a trainer here?” 
“Uh, yeah. Been doing it for a few years actually. I spent so much time here already, now I get paid for it. Can’t really complain.” 
“Do you ever do private sessions?” 
“Um-” Abby scratches the back of her awkwardly, not sure if you’re asking her genuinely or if you’re trying to insinuate something else entirely. 
“Oh fuck no! I didn’t mean it like that. I just have a….job opportunity I have to get in shape for and you just look like you know what you’re doing.” Abby thought you might as well point to her physique but if anything she was flattered. It was always nice knowing something she’s been working on for years, her longest standing commitment besides Nora, is appreciated. 
“Sure, we could work something out.” You slightly smile before you exchange phones, this time on purpose, to put in the other’s number. Normally, she didn’t give out her number to clients, but Abby makes an exception for you that day. To this day, she’ll never outwardly admit why she did, not even to herself. 
Two years later, she’s single from her life being turned upside down by you. The casualty being her own relationship, leaving Nora behind was one of the hardest decisions she’s made. Nora never agreed on Abby taking the job. As much as Nora wished for Abby to be more open about their endeavors, as soon as she accepted an offer that could drastically expand the trajectory of their life, Nora couldn’t be asked to compromise another thing. 
That was that. Not even two months into Abby working for you and Nora had called it quits. Abby never talked about it, only you knew she had a girlfriend she used to talk about when you began training with her, and then it was just silent. Back then, you didn’t know her well enough to pry, so you didn’t. 
Even as time passed, the two of you became friends through your employment, spending all your time with her during press season for your upcoming film, Lonely Is The Muse, together. Today was the only day you had off, even if it means Abby technically had the day off, you insisted that both of you leave the hotel and go out for the day. It's the most peace you felt during the European leg of the tour. Only one more day of dealing with your sensory issues, people in your face telling you when and where to go, or the distasteful question regarding your past public breakup instead of the work you were promoting. 
Some interviewers were kind enough to let the drama go but some wanted to get their own viral moment, waiting for you to say the wrong thing. As the industry likes to say, any publicity is good publicity. 
When you’re America's sweetheart actress of the century, such luxuries can’t be afforded. 
As your manager likes to remind you, there’s a reputation you have to protect. 
“Would you like to head back now? Long day tomorrow. Last day of interviews and then your flight leaves first thing in the morning.” 
“Did Stassie put you up to this?” 
“Maybe.” 
“I thought you were supposed to be the fun one.” 
“Mhm, your definition of fun is letting you do whatever you want.” 
“And the problem with that is?” 
All Abby can do is chuckle. 
“What do you want to do then?” Abby asks. She takes note of the sparkle in your eyes, as blinding as the sun but obtaining the serenity of the moon. “I’m all ears sweetheart.” 
It’s how the two of you end up here, a rooftop party, a friend of a friend you said. The party was lowkey, more than the typical ones you would get invited. Maybe because you weren’t in Los Angeles, Miami, or New York — but tucked away on another continent — or perhaps everyone here is just discreet. 
There’s only two fans that come up to you instead of twenty. You’re thankful for some sense of normalcy, one night where you can just feel normal. It still never gets old, people coming up to you as they confess the impact you’ve had on their life. It feels unbelievable at times but you’re grateful for the luxury life you’ve been granted. 
“Here. No liquor tonight.” Abby hands you a glass of red wine, your favorite beverage of choice when you couldn’t have tequila. 
“Yes Ma’am.” You playfully salute her. More than anything, you enjoy the not so subtle chuckle. “Not that I don’t love your company but isn’t Stassie supposed to boss me around?” 
“She felt under the weather. Plus, we both know you don’t listen to her.” 
“And I listen to you?” Your hand plays with her loose blonde hair, smoothing out the white button she’s wearing. 
“Yeah, you do. I wonder why that is.” Abby is playing with fire tonight. Possibly due to the fact that you wouldn’t leave her side, not even for a moment, keeping your body close, practically gluing yourself to her. Yes, she’s charged with keeping you safe and protected but it seems you find enjoyment bringing it to another level entirely. 
“You’re much nicer to look at, that’s all.” It’s light, a quiet whisper, not meant to be heard by anyone — not even for Abby to hear. “Don’t wanna make my handsome bodyguard upset.” 
Faking your pout as you let the words leave your lips, Abby chuckles as you get closer to her, her body standing strong as you push your weight onto her. Stoic as always, while you lean on her, she keeps her eyes peeled. Ensuring your safety at all times. 
“Flattery isn’t going to get you a shot tonight.” 
“I’m just stating the obvious.” 
Abby chuckles, again. She’s delighted you’re enjoying yourself, even if it comes at her expense. There’s a soft jazz song playing outside, couples dancing to the music, you zone out for a moment as you look upon one in particular. 
They are older, possibly in their forties, raven hair beginning to gray, fine lines crinkle when they smile at each other but it’s hard to take note of anything else but the way the couple looks at each other. Your mind wonders how long they’ve been together, if it’s been for years, months, a couple weeks. 
It doesn’t really matter. You just want that. 
The feeling isn’t lost on you, especially when you’re in the arms of the woman you love. For her, she’s being protective, doing her job but you wish it was different. A bubbling desire dripping off your tongue, a need to have her close to you but because she wants. Not because she’s paid to. 
“If I can’t have any tequila shots, god forbid, you have to dance with me.” You down the rest of your wine, placing the empty glass on the bar. “C’mon, you can give Stassie an earful later.” 
Pulling her towards the makeshift dance floor, Abby leads as your head rests against her chest. The steady, soft heartbeat soothes you, a reminder of the safety you feel with her. Caught in the riptide of her kind eyes and heart full of gold. It’s what makes her so unique, so loved, so her. With a surprisingly good tone, Abby sings to the music softly before twirling you around and spinning your body back to her. 
“Is there anything you can’t do?” Your hand rubs lovingly on her lower back as she holds you in her arms. You take pride when it doesn’t feel transactional. When she holds you and it feels as if she was meant to. There’s nothing else comparable to it, her frame melting into yours as your soul finds solace in her warm embrace. 
“There’s plenty of things.” Playfully, Abby smirks. 
“Oh yeah. I’m sure.” 
The sarcasm practically drips out of you as her smirk grows wider. 
“Can I ask you something?” You hesitate for a moment as you find her beautiful blue eyes staring into your soul. It’s only then does everything troubling might dissipate while she holds you — secretly hoping it’s forever. 
“You can ask me anything.” 
You give yourself a moment to collect your thoughts as you move to the delicate beat. “Do you ever wish for a life where you could have had a normal life? I wonder if things could be different.” 
Immediately, Abby answers. 
“Not anymore, no, not for a second.” 
If it was even possible, Abby pulls you closer to her, not urging a word more. It’s how she is, cold and distant to some but they don’t feel the stutter in her breath when you’re near or the soft pad of her thumb rubbing soothingly on the back of your hand. Or the soft words of encouragement when you’re having a difficult day. 
They hear none of it. 
She dances with you for a couple more songs, before you find solace on the couch. You lay beneath the moonlight, your body cuddles into her side as you stare up at the sky. 
It’s lost on you how you’ve ended  with her, someone as kind and untainted as her, wanting to spend her free time with you, but you’re grateful for it. Whatever god you have to thank, you’ll get on your knees to praise their alter for bringing Abby into your life. She’s the best thing to ever happen to you and she doesn’t even know it. Albeit, she hardly knows the extent of how wonderful she is. 
“Why here?” 
“It’s a good night, nice weather. Why not?” 
A question with a question. It’s the most straightforward answer you’ll ever give her. Innuendos for the sweet girl to piece together, but with the soft circles being drawn her stomach with the pad of your finger leaves little to nothing to decode. 
“It’s nice, yeah.” 
Abby always has so little to say but her mind swarms with a thousand reasons why this is a bad idea and a million of why this is where the constellations in the jaded sky have led to you. Straight into the pits of innocence, a heart that’s been hurt more times than she can count but still as golden and whole as one could be. 
“What do you think of Italy?” 
“It’s nice.” 
“Nice? That’s all I get?” 
Abby smirks but her body stills when you play with the waistband of her trousers before gliding back to the security of her abdomen, carving the liner of her defined abs. The ones she tries so hard to cover up, but you saw on the very first day you met her. 
“Do you want more?” You ask, an eyebrow raising in suggestion. Abby knows it’s a double edged sword, one she doesn’t want to be injured with. 
“You’re playing a very dangerous game.” Cautiously, Abby warns. “I’m not sure that last drink was a great idea.” 
You rest your head on her sternum, sapphire eyes looking down at you as her hand finds home on your waist, the blunt of your nails scratching softly at her stomach. 
“They always seem like a great idea at the time, don’t they?” With a gentle hand, you caress her scarred cheek, the pad of your thumb gently tenderly kissing the freckled skin. Outlining the softness of her jaw with your left, while your right one refuses to leave her stomach. 
“I don’t see how anyone would ever want to leave you.” Abby hums, not giving you much to go off of, tight lipped as she’s always been. The Nora situation has always been on your mind. One day, Abby’s speaking of her like she’s the love of her life and the next? Abby stiffens so tight when you bring up her name you promise yourself to never speak of it again. Until now, almost two years later, you’re more curious than you have ever been. The fatal ending, not belonging to you, but still you paw for the answers with your greedy palms. 
“You can just ask me if you want to know. I can see the look in your eyes.” 
“What look? I don’t have a—” 
Abby tilts your chin with your palm, leaning into her touch as you often do. 
“Yes, you do.” 
“How do you know this look?” 
“Hm.��� Her thumb pulls at your bottom lip, “You’re just trying to get me in trouble now.” 
Your tone shifts, your eyes become transcendent, more crystal clear than they’d been all night. 
“What happened between you and Nora?” You ask, treading lightly on the ground you’re skating upon, in fear the ground beneath you might just crack if you apply too much pressure. 
“Why is it so important to you?” 
“It’s not that it’s—” You face plant into her chest, giving yourself a moment to breathe. Fuck, even her chest smells good. 
“You don’t ask about anything unless it’s of value to anyone. You don’t waste time, you’re very adamant about it. Painfully so.” Blonde eyebrows relax as she closes her eyes for a moment, but her touch on you soothes you. It’s gentle; a somber comfort bleeding into blissful joy. 
“But I’ve spent a lot of time with you.” 
“Yes, you’ve spent a lot of your time with me.
Abby opens her eyes to see you, your head tilted to the right, as you look upon each carve of her angelic face, the one that could only be carved by the gods above, resembling an angel on earth. As pure as the snow with the biggest heart of gold you ever have had the pleasure of knowing. 
“What?” 
“I didn’t say a thing.” You smile slyly. 
“We didn’t break up because of you, if that’s what you’re asking.” Abby sighs, “You’re not some homewrecker. My home with Nora was already wrecked before we met.” 
“Are you just saying it to make me feel better?” 
“No, I’m not.” You play with the ends of her golden hair, it hurts to be this close to what you want but knowing it’s so clearly out of your reach, league even, all of it will end the same. “Nora wasn’t fond of her being my first relationship with a woman. It caused a ripple effect, me feeling like I wasn’t good enough and her feeling like she has to carry me in the relationship, emotionally anyway.” 
“Is that why you broke up?” 
“No.” 
“It was because of me.” You state, as a matter of fact, knowing there is no other truth to be known. With tears welling up in your eyes, an ache  in your heart, one that made you ache all over. The dread of the guilt weighing heavily on your heart, time and distance still isn’t enough for you to run from it. 
“It was a job that was a great opportunity. Alright? It wasn’t you, even if I hadn’t, we both wanted different things. I didn’t even realize it until after but I wasn’t happy. I promise, it has nothing to do with you.” 
What Abby didn’t know, you needed to hear her say those words. In the back of your head, a monstrous demon unleashes in your mind, telling you crashed her relationship. You were the problem and her inevitable doom, but she’s assuring you it wasn’t the case. 
“We hardly knew each other back then.” 
As pathetic as it sounds, Abby can’t imagine her life without you. 
“Yeah hardly.” 
There’s that look again, pouring into Abby’s soul as it eats her up whole, the gleam in your eyes begging for more. It’ll complicate things if Abby gets involved, she knows this, but it already seems like she is despite her best efforts not to be. 
“Did I do good? You always say you miss stargazing with your brother back home. I know it’s not as quiet as the cabin you have, but I thought it would be okay for now.” 
“The view isn’t bad, not one bit.” She admits as she lets you rub her abdomen, the goosebumps crawling upon her skin the more Abby lets you touch her as if she’s yours to hold. “Lev would like it. I’m convinced the kid likes you more than me now.” 
“As he should. I’m pretty damn amazing.” 
“He asks too many questions though.” 
“About what?” 
“I dunno…..things.” Abby retreats back into her shell, the layer of protection she uses to protect herself from getting hurt. Most of all, out of everyone the gods could torture her to be confused about, of course it has to be you. Everyone in your life is always begging for pieces of your time, pieces of your affection and bits of your time to suck you dry. Abby has always wondered how you juggle it all. It feels cruel to even think you would put her in the mix. 
Painfully, there’s nights like tonight, where she sees the desire swarming in your eyes — every part of her pleads to give in to the temptation. Give into something she’s never even let herself think about until the last few months. As thick as drywall, there was a barrier keeping her heart from you, one she kept to protect you and herself even. 
The absolute last thing she wanted was to wreck everything this has to offer. If she makes the wrong move, all of it can come crashing down on you…it’s the last thing she wants. Make you a martyr in her story, one she thinks and dreams of often but knows you’re too big for her to exist in your life. The circles you run in don’t even exist in the same planet, the same fucking universe if Abby’s being honest. 
“What things?” You pout, your hand traveling south, caressing her thigh with a familiarity Abby wishes you didn’t have. She wishes for a lot but they never come true, that’s all you can be, a dying wish Abby curses upon a fading star.  
“It’s just stupid shit, not worth mentioning.” 
“Abby…” 
“Yeah?” 
“I—” You take a deep breath, your voice already shaky and you haven’t even told her yet. “I don’t think you even know how much you mean to me.” Abby isn’t sure where you’re going with this, terrifying her instantly. 
Have you finally had your fill of her? Were you gonna fire her? Now? 
“Lev doesn’t just talk to you about us.” 
“Us?” Nervously, Abby stomach clenches, unprepared for where this conversation is heading. 
“Why are you so scared?” 
Abby visibly and loudly gulps, almost making you giggle slightly. 
“I-I’m not.” 
The stonewall she attempts to hide behind but you won’t let her, not tonight. Slumping in the shadows, waiting for you to find someone else to love as she watches your happiness from a far, that’s what she allows herself. Nothing more and nothing less. 
“Abs, look at me.” She meets your eyes, away from the constellations in the sky, afraid if she looks for a moment too long she’ll be stuck here forever. “Talk to me, m’right here, not going anywhere unless you want me to.” 
Instantly, Abby grips your hips, keeping you in your place. 
“No, that’s not—” 
“What?” 
“I’m not what you want. I’m surely not what anyone needs. Hell, I’ve only been with one woman which is deemed to be for not being enough, right? I’m the girl who came out too late, who doesn’t have enough experience but because I’m built like some fucking adonis I need to know whatever the fuck I’m doing but I don’t. I never know what I’m doing. The only thing I know how to do is protect you, that’s all I’m good for and I’m not gonna screw that up just because I—” 
“Because what?” Your pelvis is on top of hers, your face coming closer to Abby’s, watching as you are irrevocably close to her, closer than you’ve ever been, wet lips ghosting over her pouty pink lips. Abby doesn’t even know when you moved, how you got so close, too lost in her own head to register your movements. 
“It doesn’t matter.” Abby puffs out. 
“It matters to me.” You sink into her, further, if it's even possible. “No one matters more than you, alright?” 
“But there’s people.” Abby looks for an excuse to get up, she comes up enough so she’s sitting up against the armrest of the patio couch, holding your lower back as she does so, leaving you straddling her hips. 
“I don’t care. All that matters is you.” You push a piece of blonde hair away, seeing her beautiful cheeks more clearly, her shining blue eyes finding its unique path to your heart, the one especially made for her. “Here just let me talk, alright? You don’t have to say anything. Just listen.” 
Abby is nearly crying, practically purring as you run your fingers through her cascading blonde hair. It’s too much but not enough. Although she is sure of one thing, the one thing she wants more than anything. 
“I’ve always been one for pretty girls. I had a reputation around Hollywood, always chasing one after the next, never reaching my fill or as the tabloids like to say.” You chuckled half-heartedly; the wound cutting deeper than you would have liked. “My publicist having to pay paparazzi an obscene amount of money to get these photos from ever hitting online, month after month, it was pathetic really. Just trying to fill a hole, one I didn’t even know how to fill.” 
“I didn’t know that.” 
“It’s not something I’m proud of and I never wanted you to see me differently but I’m not ashamed anymore though. I’m not that person anymore. I haven’t been since I met you.” Abby falls silent, her cheeks turning crimson before she can try to hide it “You not knowing how I was, it's just the humbling I needed. Not to mention you were the most beautiful woman I had ever seen— you still are— but you had a girlfriend so I kept my feelings silent. Something just felt different with you and then you were single and I was afraid of you.” 
“Why?” 
“Because I didn’t want to ruin you so I made a promise to myself. I would never start anything with you, not unless I was in love with you.” 
“You love me?” 
“It’s impossible not to.” You sigh into her, forehead pressed against hers, her strong hold not letting go. “You don’t have to say anything or do anything. I don’t expect anything in return. I just can’t live in a world where you think because you’re not experienced as some, you think you’re less than people who are.” 
“It’s true, I’m not there with everyone else and it shows.” 
“Abby, you’re not getting it.” 
“Well, no shit. I’m not good enough for any of this, you especially.” 
“It’s not…” You bite your lip as you reach for her hands on your waist, intertwining them with your own. “Abs, it would’ve saved me a lot of trouble.” Your lips ghost over her lips again, but this time Abby inches closer, her breath warm as it hits your mouth. 
“What?” 
“If I was a patient person and waited for you.” 
More than before, Abby’s breath is heavy as the rise and fall of her chest is rapid, trying to calm herself down but it’s impossible when you’re this close. It’s a lot for her, maybe she’s overly sensitive, but your touch is practically lighting her on fire. Abby wonders if it will ever be able to be put out or if your magnetic touch will leave her scorned. 
Puppy eyes inwardly pleading for an ounce of your touch, so sweet as she supports your weight with her strong thighs, anchoring you to her — never quite letting go. A single glance detrimental to the layer of protection she built around herself. 
“There’s no more waiting, m’right here.” Abby closes the gap indefinitely, lips connecting with yours as they move in perfect harmony, as if this is what she was made for. Involuntarily, she whimpers in your mouth as you gently tug at her bottom nibble at her bottom lip, your tongue sliding in as it dominates her own. It happens too quickly — the way her very being melts into you. 
Like honey to a bee, there’s nothing that’s ever been so sweet. 
This is all you need. 
“Abby?” 
“Yeah, angel?” 
“Let’s get out of here.”
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nickireadstfc · 8 years ago
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The Foxhole Court, Chapter 3 - Ball Is Life
In which things get progressively gayer, Neil has a boner over Orange Sportsball, Andrew’s Serious Issues™ continue and youth alcoholism has never looked this good.
Sounds good? Then it’s time for Nicki to read The Foxhole Court.
           Neil spotted the Foxhole Court long before they made it onto the stadium parking lot. Built to seat sixty-five thousand fans, it’d been placed on the outskirts on campus.
SIXTY-FIVE THOUSAND WHAT. To put this into perspective, the three biggest stadiums currently used in American lacrosse seat 30,000 (Harvard Stadium, Boston Cannons/Harvard Crimson), 34,000 (Navy-Marine Corps Memorial Stadium, Chesapeake Bayhawks) and 70,000 (Sports Authority Field at Mile High, Denver Outlaws).
It should look something like this (the Hard Rock Stadium in Miami, used in football, seating exactly 65,000):
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And that’s the seating capacity for a shitty Exy team.
What the fuck. I’m beginning to realise that this sport may be bigger than I initially thought.
           Neil went up to the fence and stared through it at the outer grounds. (…) It made every hair on his body stand on end, and his heartbeat echoing in his ears sounded like an Exy ball rebounding off a court wall.
This is some Oliver Wood type of sportsball obsession, holy shit. Calm down, hombre.
(Will I make a Harry Potter reference every single chapter? Probably.)
And now, things get good:
           “What’d your girlfriend get you [for your birthday]?”
           Neil looked at him. “What?”
           “Come on, cute face like yours has to have a girlfriend.”
Okay, first I freaked out over this because he’s canonically cute omg this is the best th-
And then this happens.
           “Unless you swing my way, of course, in which case please tell me now and save me the trouble of having to figure it out.”
NICKY I LOVE YOU. YOUR ASS HAS JUST BEEN INSTANTLY PROMOTED TO SECOND FAVE.
Canon gay people!! I expected this but still!! This is chapter three and we’ve already got canon gay people!!
Am I biased because of my own queerness? Totally. Ya girl loves herself some good representation.
But hold on, my friends! This masterpiece of a scene isn’t done yet!
           Neil stared at him, wondering how Nicky could care about such things when the stadium was right there.
I am HOWLING. This may be the best sentence in this entire chapter.
BALL IS LIFE. BALL IS LOVE.
Neil has priorities, you guys.
           “I don’t swing either way,” Neil said. “Let’s go in.”
           “Bullshit,” Nicky said.
           “I don’t,” Neil said, and impatience put an edge in his voice. It wasn’t quite the truth, but it was close enough.
Spoiler alert: He’s demisexual, tumblr (and certain demisexual friends) have told me this as I got it wrong in my powerpoint slideshow post. Sorry about that.
S/o to all my demisexual peeps, and s/o to Nora Sakavic for representation beyond the usual. ❤
           The majority of the pictures looked like they’d been taken by one of the Foxes themselves. These were scattered anywhere they could fit and held up by tape.
Where is the Foxes’ snapchat I need to see it.
Nicky probably uses the Fox filter all the time. Andrew probably hits him for it.
           Exy was a co-ed sport, but few colleges wanted women in their lines. According to Fox lore, Palmetto State refused to approve any of the women Wymack asked for his first year.
*effie trinket voice* That is MISOGYNY!
           Nicky tapped the faces in the closest photograph. “Dan, Renee and Allison. Dan’s good people, but she’ll work you to the bone. Allison’s a catty bitch you should avoid at all costs. Renee’s a sweetheart. Be nice to her.”
Yet another quote I fucking knew by heart before even starting the books. Y’all really aren’t very creative in finding captions for your grunge-y pastel moodboards.
Also, if Renee is such a sweet soft angel (which is pointed out again later, so I believe it), the fuck is she doing with the Foxes? Has she killed a man with kindness? Am intrigued. When do we meet this murderous snowflake.
Next up, they enter the actual stadium and Neil proceeds to have the Biggest Sports Boner Ever over the court.
I can’t quote here because this description goes on for two pages, but I would like to point out that this is one of the most well-written passages of the book so far. I had the scene play in my head like a film, lights flooding the stadium, Neil imagining what it would look like flooded with people caught up in thrill of a game, his longing to play this court even if it will cost him his freedom. Chapeau, Miss Sakavic.
Also damn. And they said Kevin is the obsessed one.
(Cue generic “enemies discover they have more in common than initially thought and overcome their differences by playing sports together and become close friends” trope.)
(I apologize for calling this generic. I love it.)
           “Satellites can pick these [windbreakers] up in outer space,” [Neil] said.
           Nicky laughed at that. “Dan commissioned them her first year here. She said she was tired of everyone trying to look past us.”
Nicky laughs, my skin is cleared, my crops are growing and an angel gets his wings.
Also I will present this Dan with the Best Captain Ever Award instantly when we meet her.
           “You know we donate a portion of our ticket sales to charity? Our tickets cost a little more than anyone else’s because of that. Renee’s idea. Told you she’s pure gold.”
WE HAVE FOUND THE SECOND HUFFLEPUFF THIS IS NOT A DRILL. RENEE LET ME LOVE YOU.
And now it’s Orange Sportsball time!
           “Is Kevin not going to play today?”
           Nicky looked surprised that he’d ask. “Kevin only tolerates our court under two conditions: Alone, or with Andrew on it.”
Ah yes, thank you for reminding me, I had momentarily forgotten what level of EXTRA Kevin is on.
           “Thank you,” Neil said belatedly.
           “Huh? Oh no. Don’t worry about it. You can make it up to me some other time when the others aren’t around.”
           “Can you try and get ass when I’m not standing right here?” Aaron asked.
I thank our otherworldly overlords every day for the comedic gay blessing that is Nicky Hemmings.
           “If you take German as your elective here, just let me know and I’ll tutor you. I’m good with my tongue.”
For fuck’s sake, keep it in your goddamned pants.
Or, as Germans would say: Jetzt ist nicht der richtige Zeitpunkt, den Lörres reinzuhämmern, mein Freund. #erstmaldlrh
Also, is this Erik guy for real? He sounds p irrelevant. 10 bucks says they’re gonna break up.
They play a beautiful game of Orange Sportsball, Neil gets a glimpse of happiness (yay), and on their way out they are greeted by Kevin being Mad and Extra.
           Kevin got right in his face and tangled his fingers through the netting on Neil’s racquet. (…)
          “Forget the stadium. Forget the Foxes and your useless high school team and your family. See it the only way it really matters, where Exy is the only road to take. What do you see?”
          [bla bla long sequence in which Neil ponders on the fact that Exy is Everything™]
          “You,” Neil said at last.
          “Tell me I can have your game.”
          It wouldn’t do them any good, but Neil wasn’t going to get into that. “Take it.”
          “Neil understands,” Kevin said.
*”enemies discover they have more in common than initially thought and overcome their differences by playing sports together and become close friends” trope intensifies*
Do people ship those two? Because I can totally see that happening.
Speaking of shipping: Andrew is back!
           [Andrew] scooped the whiskey up and twisted the lid off.
          (…) “About time you stopped that, don’t you think? Abby’s going to beat me senseless if she realizes you’ve been drinking.”
          “Doesn’t sound like my problem,” Andrew said with a brilliant smile.
Daamn Andrew, back at it again with the youth alcoholism!
I’m not kidding though, manic Andrew scares me so much more than soulless Andrew did. I want my murder son back, not this fake-cheery, Joker rip-off version.
I’m temporarily comforted as we are reminded that Wymack is, in fact, the Best Person Ever:
           “Showers aren’t communal here. Coach put in stalls when he built the stadium. The board wouldn’t pay for it – they didn’t see the point – so it came out of Coach’s own pocket.”
LET ME LOVE YOU, YOU WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING.
Andrew makes fun of Neil for wanting to shower in privacy and for having a beat up body, Neil freaks out, yadda yadda, go die in a fire, you manic asshole.
Also, I know this isn’t what’s meant here, but I’m really liking the idea of trans!Neil. Scars on his torso? Always showers in privacy? Changed his identity and his name? Just saying.
They then drive over to Abby’s house, who also immediately claims a place in my too-big heart:
           “David? Shut up and make sure the vegetables aren’t boiling over. Kevin, check the bread. It’s in the oven. Nicky, table. Aaron, help him. Andrew Joseph Minyard, that better not be what I think it is.”
What. A. Mom.
For the record: I’m chipping in with Nicky’s betting pot as well. Those two have skipped long past the boning zone, straight into actual married couple land.
Everyone gathers round and eats some lasagna like the wonderful dysfunctional family that they are. Yay. Now I want some lasagna.
(Note to self: Do not read before dinner.)
Then, Neil is taken to his new home by Coach Wymack, and Nora Sakavic gets childhood abuse trauma spot on once again:
           Getting in the car alone with [Wymack] was the hardest thing Neil had done all day. Andrew was crazy, but Neil had an ingrained distrust of men old enough to be his father. He spent the entire ride frozen and silent in the passenger seat.
Kudos.
However, of course, Wymack is totally undeserving of distrust as he is the Best Person Ever, Coach of Champions, Owner of My Heart.
           “Use what you need, and take what you want from the kitchen. It’ll piss me off more if you act like a skittish stray cat than it will if you eat the last bowl of cereal.”
Happy sigh.
Nicki out.
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yllem · 7 years ago
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Softball 2017- June 4th
Royals: My mighty Royals are back in action this year! Of the 13 players I coached last season, 11 returned and I drafted ALL of them. Softball was not for Abby and Zoe moved to baseball. I want to say nice things about them all and my season! Or bad things! Whatever!
To begin, these kids aren’t as good as Morgan at first, so we won’t clobber everyone this year, but I have finally mastered lineups and keeping them all together. This year feels very organized and having 9 returning players on this team with their families is a blessing.
Calleigh: I am so impressed with her improvements as a softball player! Not only is she hitting very well (with Laura’s old bat I might add), but her glove is really improving and she is looking great at first base! What helps Calleigh is her size and athletic ability through multiple sports. I see her becoming a very good softball player.
Haley: My little bundle of joy, Haley keeps everything so jolly on the field and connects with any team she is near. She has made great strides as a player, assuming because her dad probably works with her. I am hoping she gets the opportunity to play up this year in midget. With her passion for the sport, she will also have a very successful softball career.
Bella: My fourth season coaching, and my fourth year with Bella! I love the company of she and Vince. What hurts Bella is that she is so small. If we can give her confidence, she won’t shut down because she is discouraged. She’s come a long way with fielding ground balls. Just need to break her bad habits while throwing and she will lead the team.
Sophia: Wow, Sophia improves every year. Erica told me that one day she also wants to coach softball which warms my heart. I feel like I’ve been a good role model to them! She is hitting so well, even though I am throwing the balls to her fast. Her glove has also gotten better, but we need to break her noodle arms and she will be ready to move up. Very impressed with her! Love this family and having her on my team for a third season.
Ava: Little Ava is still so little which has hurt her playing ability, but she always improves throughout the season and brings a her sweetness and energy to the team. Don’t know where I would be without her over these last three years!
Giana: I have seen improved focus from her in our third season together. She’s still my silly, funny, catcher, and her bat is always improving. If we can keep her focused 100% of the time she could be a good little player. She just turned 7, so she will have at least one more season in pee wee, if not, two for insurance. Having Ray on the field is an invaluable asset. Such a fun guy!
Allison: I am always impressed by her knowledge of the game and her playing ability. She joined our team for the second year a little late, and I cannot be happier about having her with us. She’s adorable for starters, but an incredible little player. Will be an incredible softball player. No question.
Keira: The Keeney family is so helpful and kind. Glad that we can be together, again! Keira, Keira, so clever and quick... she’s one of Joe’s favorite girls for that reason. Always makes us laugh. She has come such a long way this year and I love hearing her talk about how excited she is to play in midget. Power to ya, little thang!
Lucy: Ahh, Lucy... so energetic and fun, but really lacking focus this year. I adore she and her parents, so I am hoping she warms up throughout the season. She’s only played one game so far, but became successful throughout last season. Spirit award winner last year..
Charlotte: One of my new girls! I can’t believe that Charlotte is only 6 sometimes. She’s so big! She’s really great about making contact with the bat, despite it being her first season. As long as she is paying attention, she is also pretty solid with keeping ground balls in front of her and has an impressive arm for someone so young. Her mom is so excited to be out there, and her dad will probably be a coach one day, haha.
Aubrie: Anotha newbie. I see a lot of improvement to come from Aubrie, especially when games are not so spaced out. She works hard and is warming up the the sport. It helps to have Giana on the team to bring her out of that shell. 
Claire: Little stud, how is your form so perfect your first year? Claire is very excited to play midget next year, which is something I love to hear! I am hoping she does not get bored playing down and will have to give her more responsibility. Her dad Jim has been helpful as well. What a sweetheart. Fits right in with the girls as if she’s played with us for years!
London: She is only 5 years old which makes things really hard. She cries a lot on the field and consistently comes late or not at all without mention. If she can stay engaged, I hope to see improvement. Otherwise, I’m just trying not to lose my shit babysitting. Sweet kid, but five might be too young for softball unless a parent is on staff to help coach.
Angels: This year started off pretty tough.. I picked a studddd out of the evaluation as my pool pitcher and she quit without even coming to one practice, saying the team wouldn’t be competitive enough for her. Whatever, dude. This dad has coached before and said he felt bad but I think that’s a load of garbage. Luckily, in the draft, I took a lot of beginning pitchers and both are coming along great! I learned today that the girl I got to replace the studdd taught herself to pitch and is slow, but can throw strikes. That means I have five girls that can pitch in games, and three more young ones to develop. Nice! 
So far on the season, we have played three games. The first got called for darkness. Had we played the last inning, we would have won. The second game was a slaughter, and the last one we won! Excited for our three games this week.
Morgan: My second year with this all in, all out player. I love her passion for the sport and she never fails to impress me with her willingness to play anywhere and learn any position. She is working on pitching currently, catching really well, and is always solid as a short stop. One of my favorite kids ever and I am so lucky to have snagged her early in the draft for a second year.
Angie: Our second season together, Angie is either on or off with her effort. If we can straighten some things out, she could be a solid player. I feel the need to protect her since I know her situation. She is a sweet girl and I am hoping to see a lot from her this season. She has improved SO much.
Tatiana: Little miss Seattle commutes from downtown to be on this team. She can step on the mound and throw strikes with a big smile on her face. I like that she is able to make friends in the city this way. She’s a strong player, but gets a little rusty. As long as she lays off the high pitches, this girl is going to be a killer.
Arabella: I am so happy that everyone passed on this kid!!! She is somehow always on base. Like through three games I’m pretty sure her OBP is 1.000. Great! Also a huge asset with her pitching and her glove. Eager to learn but keeps it cool on the field without getting frustrated. I love it.
Lindsey: This kid is all over the place but is so energetic and I love that! Need to work on that attitude sometimes, but I can tell she’s enjoying herself and she feels pride in her position. Not having a bad first season. Looking forward to her growth as a player and I’m glad to have her goofy self and the help of her dad.
Abbey: This kid is always so happy and she’s so small and cute! I didn’t know who the heck she was in the draft, they basically just tossed her to me, but she is a great addition to our team as a catcher. She’s starting to make good contact now that we are playing more games and she never gives me any issues. Also she goes to Thorp which is cool.
Lauren: This is my replacement for the stud. She has not played since she was seven years old and on a baseball team, but is continually making strides as a player. Her pitching today looked good and I love that she is always looking to learn things about the game by asking questions. I needed a first baseman and she was the perfect addition to our team for this reason. She is a leader on the field as well. So excited to see her improve more and more each game!! I’d honestly rather have her on the team than the studdd since she is open with everyone and truly wants to be there.
Chloe: First year and very timid. I drafted her because I liked her family a lot and that is still a good reason to have her. I am going to work with her more so that she gets better and has more confidence. She made me a little heart that says “Thanks for all the help” which is one of the most meaningful things a player has ever given me. 
Briana: Little stud is in her first summer season after fall ball and ran down a ball in center and caught it! I see her being very good as she continues to learn. Great drive, great kid. Hoping to give her some time at second this season.
Katelyn: First year playing, and smaller than her sister which is what slows her down. I love her drive to learn and continue to get better. I am going to work with this kid, like Chloe, to make sure she is able to improve.
Gabrielle: I love having this spark of joy because she has a good arm and a good glove, despite her tiny size. She always has me smiling and having Andy along there with her has been a great relief. He’s awesome and I enjoy his company. Gabs loves softball and as she gets bigger, I look forward to seeing her growth as a player.
Emily: MY SUPERSTAR CAN DO IT ALL! Incredible glove and an even better attitude. How many 12 year olds can switch hit?! She pitches hard, and as long as we keep her from hitting batters, she will be an ace. I want her to learn to work through situations while it is still early in the season, but I would be lost without her. Awesome girl. Unlike the pool pitcher, she is not intimidated by playing with younger girls and serves as a great leader to them and friend.
I love my teams!
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