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cierraonline · 2 months ago

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A Short Elf Apocalypse

Chapter three - 01x02 Light Bulb

Warning - none

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“So, how's your first week going so far?” asked Viola Banks, the fifty-year-old mother of the twenty-three-year-old eighth-grade teacher.

“The exact answer I gave you when I was attending the school as a student,” Siren commented, opening the heavy front doors to the building of her workplace—and nightmare. “Nothing has changed, and nothing ever will, Mom.”

“Well, something did change. You aren’t a student anymore,” the optimistic voice of the older woman rang through the speaker of the teacher's iPhone. “I’m sure this feels a little like being a superhero in the dark pit hole you call a soul.”“You read through my 10th-grade diary again, didn’t you?” Siren stopped in her tracks, recognizing the reference in her mother’s words.

“Hey, I’ve got to get some mothering in, now that you’ve moved out to live with your wife…who you’ve been married to for two years…why did you wait to move in with her again?”

“I like going at my own pace, not the standard,” Siren rolled her eyes. “But if you really want an update on how life as a teacher has been, here it is: So far, I've got this annoying little elf always trying to talk to me and make me part of her clique with her and this wannabe Sheldon.

“Who, Janine and Jacob?” Her mother cut her off. “They’re nice people. You should befriend them! I like them better than your current friends, whose only goals in life are smoking the devil’s evaporation (hookah) and shaking their tail feathers as if they’re having seizures (twerking). Janine and Jacob are the kind of friends you need.”

“Janine and Jacob are the kind of friends an Alzheimer’s patient needs, so they can forget they ever met them.” As Siren walked down the hall toward the lounge for her morning coffee, her attention was drawn to a random little girl holding her hand while staring up at the flickering lights. “And now, thanks to this crappy building, we’ve got flickering lights recreating ‘The Shining’, and I have a random child holding my hand.”

“Sounds like a beautiful day at Abbott to me,” her mother’s smile was audible through the phone.

“Yeah, so why don’t you come back?” the teacher sarcastically responded.

“Oh no, I’m packing for the Bahamas. I’m going to enjoy my retirement. Tell Barbara and Melissa I’ll have a bottle of imported wine and fine cheese waiting for them when I get back.”

“You mean that cheap wine on your kitchen counter and sliced block cheddar cheese?” Siren deflated her mother’s fancy image with reality.

“Shoot, $8 for a bottle and $5 for some cheese—it’s fancy to me. Love you, baby, have an inspiring day.”

“Love you too, Mommy.” With that, the call ended.

“You call your mommy, ‘Mommy’, too?” The girl still holding Siren’s hand looked up with wide eyes.

“Girl, don’t you have lights to be scared of?” Siren snarked.

“Oh yeah,” the little girl, probably in second grade, turned her terrified gaze back to the lights.

“Guys, the lights in the back hallway have been out for weeks,” Siren heard Janine’s squeaky, annoying voice as she entered the teacher’s lounge.

“Thank you for the update.”

“What are you wearing?”

“And we need to do something about it. Okay?” Janine stayed focused, ignoring their side comments. “Uh, Melina, from your class… Yeah, she was afraid to come to school this morning. Said it looked like ‘The Shining’, and I don’t even get how she knows that reference.”

“She loves ‘The Shining.’ It's a classic movie,” Jacob added.

“You mean her?” Siren made her presence known, holding up the hand of the girl who refused to let go.

“Melina, I thought I walked you to class already?” Janine turned to the little girl.

“But then I had to pee!” Melina exclaimed in a childlike voice. “Plus, she looked scary, so she can scare away the monsters,” she pointed to Siren. Bending down to meet the girl’s eyes with an intense stare, Siren tilted her head and said, “Boo,” nonchalantly.

“Ahhh!” The student screamed, letting go of her hand and running out the teacher’s lounge.

“Siren!” Barbara scolded her goddaughter, to which she received only a shrug in response.

“This isn’t okay, alright? And I already talked to Mr. Johnson, and he said there’s nothing he can do,” Janine brought the attention back to her concern.

“What do you want us to do about it?” Barbara asked the naïve teacher.

“It can’t be hard. It’s just screwing in a few new bulbs.”

“So why don’t you do it?” Siren walked over to make herself a cup of coffee, adding sweetened almond milk and dropping in a caramel hard candy. “Why does it have to be a group project?”

“Because we’re a team,” Janine smiled.

“And you’re the only one on the team complaining about the lights,” Siren pointed out.

“Janine, just worry about what can be controlled,” the kindergarten teacher emphasized.

“Exactly. On a hot day like this, all we can do is our own jobs anyway,” Melissa added.

“I know that’s right!” Ava walked into the lounge. “Why is it February and hotter than the devil’s bootyhole outside?”

“Climate change,” Siren and Jacob said in unison.

“We’re living in the middle of its disastrous effects,” Jacob continued. “The permafrost in Russia—”

“Nerd,” Ava fake-coughed into her fist.

“Ava, can someone from the city come and check on the back hallway lights?” Janine turned to her.

“Girl, no. Do I look like the Kool-Aid Man? I don’t have enough juice to manipulate the inner workings of City Hall,” Ava retorted. “They’ll probably come in the summer.”

“In the summer?” Janine was disheartened.

“Tough break.” Jacob walked over to the upset teacher with a container of breakfast food. “Want some egg white bites?” he offered as Melissa and Barbara left after the principal.

“No. I don’t have time to eat,” Janine replied, giving him a look up and down.

“They’re just egg white bites. You microwave them,” he called after her, before turning to the only teacher left in the lounge besides him. “Want some, Siren?”

“You got hot sauce?” Siren asked, not even looking up from her TikTok feed, filled with WNBA coverage and tattoo artists’ work.

“No,” Jacob shook his head.

“Then no.”

XXX

“Alright, I let you guys eat your breakfast and freshen up—it’s my time now,” Siren declared, walking into her classroom to see her students scattered around, sitting and ready to learn. “First lesson of the year that doubles as your English and History. Half of the class will read “The Diary of a Young Girl” by Anne Frank, and the other half will read “Chains” by Laurie Halse Anderson.”

“Why are we reading two different books?” Mason raised his hand, confused, as teachers usually had the class read the same book.

“So we can get through the reading material the board wants you to read faster and move on to the better stuff. Plus, for your first History lesson, you’ll use your assigned book as a primary source and other books in the school’s library as secondary sources for your first Socratic seminar. You’ll debate which event in history was worse: holocaust or slavery.” Siren walked behind her desk, bringing out two stacks of newly purchased books, ten of each.

“Do we get to pick which book we want to read?” Candace asked from the couch area.

“Nope. When you’re older, whether it’s for college research papers or if you want to be a lawyer, you won’t always get to defend the side you want. This will also help you knock out biases.” Siren took the first stack of books and handed them out to ten of her students at random. “This assignment will take two weeks. One week to read and gather research, and the second week to prepare your arguments and anticipate counterarguments. During English, you’ll be reading, and during History, you’ll conduct research in the library.”

“Are you going to be the judge?” Jahmil asked.

“There will be two judges—me, and a teacher I can slightly stand.”

“What are the rules?” Javon raised his hand.

“The rules are: One, no profanity. Two, no sharing argument points. Three, do not take this lesson outside of class and start harmful debates. Four, actually listen to what each side has to say.”

“Siren,” Kyle raises his hand.

“Yes, Kyle.”

“Can I talk to you outside the classroom?” The boy looked around at his peers with a nervous stance.

“Sure,” Siren nods. “In the meantime, all of you get started. First period starts now. As you read, take notes; that’s how you will be graded in the English portion.” As the class got started on their assignment, in which they were actually excited to partake, the teacher and student stepped outside for a private discussion. “What’s wrong, Kyle?”

“I–I don’t feel comfortable doing this assignment… because you know, I–I’m…”

“White?”

“Yeah.” The student nodded his head.

“Okay, let me ask you a few questions,” Siren took a seat on the hallway floor, and the student followed. “Were you there during slavery?”

“No,” Kyle shook his head.

“Were you there during the Holocaust?”

“No.”

“Do you agree with those who promoted those horrific events?”

“Of course not,” Kyle looked at the teacher as if she were crazy.

“Do you agree with modern interpretations or developments of those ideologies?”

“Huh?” He looked confused.

“Do you agree with the mindset of those who are racists or follow Nazi ideology?” Siren rephrased.

“Oh, no.”

“Then you have nothing to feel uncomfortable or guilty about due to the color of your skin. In fact, that’s why I gave you “Chains.” There’s more to being white in a classroom of predominantly Black students—there’s an opportunity to be an ally. Because one day, your classmates right now are going to be in your position, where they might be the only Black student in a predominantly white class.”

“My grandparents voted for Trump. Does that mean I’ll also have to vote Republican?” Kyle asked.

“What’s your grandparents’ favorite cereal?”

“Raisin Bran… it’s so not cool or good.”

“But you see how they might love it, but you don’t. Opinions work like that. The beautiful thing about opinions is that we’re not supposed to agree on everything, or life would be boring. They can try to force their opinions on you, but as long as you keep that big brain of yours working, your opinions will always be yours.”

“Thank you, Siren,” Kyle smiled, feeling better than he had before the conversation.

“You’re welcome. Now go inside and get started on your reading,” Siren directed him, and he got up from the floor and headed back into the class.

“Ha! And you said teaching wasn’t meant for you,” a feminine voice pulled Siren out of her concentration.

“How long have you been sitting there?” Siren squinted her eyes at the senior teacher.

“Long enough to see the student become the teacher,” Barbara smirked, looking down at her goddaughter. “You might not have wanted to do this, but you’re really making an impact on those kids. It’s been two days, and they haven’t even given Ava trouble yet. Teaching is a calling, and you unknowingly answered. You didn’t do it because your mother forced you; you did it because it’s in your blood and heart. It’s like watching a flashback of me and your mother when we first started. I’m proud of you,” Barbara said in her saintly voice.

“Why does it feel like you’re still teaching me?” Siren tilted her head.

“Because the teaching never stops, no matter how old you are.”

XXX

The classroom was at peace. The kids were engrossed in their reading materials, while a soft, chill playlist from YouTube played in the background. Everything was going smoothly while Siren prepared for the math lesson scheduled in thirty minutes. And then disaster struck—the lights went out. Siren had a good idea who the culprit was.

“Oh no! It’s the apocalypse!” Javon jumped from his seat and started running around, pulling down the shades and looking for a flashlight.

“Javon, the power just went out; nothing serious,” Siren tried to calm the boy. “If anything, it’s just a short ‘elf apocalypse.’” Siren stated, standing up from her seat. “You guys stay here, take a break from reading, and I’ll go try not to kill an elf.” With that, she exited the classroom and headed down two flights of stairs.

“Where is she?” Siren stomped in her leather heels like Ursula, as if the sea itself parted to let her walk through in terror. In fright, everyone in the hall pointed to the shorter teacher. “You just couldn’t help yourself, could you? You just had to put your little kid hands on anything so it fits your idea.”

“I–I just wanted—”

“I don’t care what you wanted,” Siren cut her off. “I care about what you interrupted. The light wasn’t bothering anyone besides one student who’s a little kid. Of course flickering lights scare her because it’s connected to a horror movie. All you had to do was walk her to class and follow your training on what to do when a little kid is scared: distract from the little details and look at the big picture.”

“I–I…”

“You don’t get to talk anymore because soon you’re going to make your next move, try to fix your mess, and make a bigger mess.”

“Alright, Siren, that’s enough. I’m sure Janine understands that what she did was very foolish,” Barbara tried to reign in her goddaughter’s wrath. “Listen up, everybody…”

“Listen to Barbara, y’all!” Ava shouted, frantically shouts while shaking the wooden ladder Janine was gluing herself to.

“Are you kidding me?” Janine clutched onto the ladder as she was afraid of heights.

“I should push it. Maybe you’ll break your leg, and that’ll stop you from Janine-ing up the place,” Siren glared at the frightened woman.

“This is what we’re gonna do… Everyone without power, please head to the gym,” Barbara directed the teachers.

“Head,” Ava emphasized.

“We’ll conduct classes there until this is all fixed. It’s not ideal, but it will work.”

“You heard her. Let’s go,” Ava nodded.

“Guys… I just want to say, I’m sorry, everybody,” Janine tried to apologize. “I just thought if I could get up here and get this done, then we wouldn’t have to wait and…”

“And look where it landed us, baby girl.”

“Yeah, how’d that work out for you?”

“Everybody, please, head to the gym,” Barbara announced. “We’ve got bigger fish to fry now.”

“Oh, Jesus! My branzino!” Melissa’s realization hit, and in the next second, she was running down the hall to the teacher’s lounge. “Everybody out of the way! Out of the way!”

“If someone could please help me?” Janine called out. “I feel like I’m one wobble away from death.”

“A–Alright. Okay. I got you,” Gregory moved to help but was beaten by Siren pushing one side of the ladder, causing it to fold. Janine fell a couple of feet to the floor, sprawled out.

“There,” Siren muttered before walking away.

“Thank you,” Janine whimpered in pain. “I don’t think she likes me much.”

“That would be an understatement,” Gregory added.

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