#a while ago i opened up the controller for my cats heating pad to check the board bc the display flickers and two of the buttons dont work

[today-i-am-thinking-about]

electrocution

[zhongliologist]

Breeding Kink Pt. 2 | Dragon!Zhongli

Pairing: Zhongli x fem!reader

Genre: SMUTTTT!!

Words: 5.2k

A/N: Oh god i have no braincells anymore. Zhongli fcked with my braincells as well. Here ya go. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Happy Birthday as well.

Warning: THIS IS AN 18+ FIC, SO MINORS OUT THERE, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION.

PART 1 HERE

*

It was already deep into the night.

The last of the busy market kiosks has died down, the golden glow of their lanterns flickered off for the day, while the late-night loiterers had gone to rest at their station as silence and the sound of crickets settled in. The harbor has truly gone to sleep after a rough day’s work, and will rise once again at early dawn.

Yet inside the bedchambers of a certain married couple, things were still heating up.

“Z-Zhongli…! Please…!”

You held on to the silken sheets tightly with face flushed and sweating. Every now and then, a moan would escape your lips, savoring the moment where ecstasy was at its peak. It felt good—really good—as your husband Zhongli thrusted sharply into you.

“YN…” he growled beside your ear as he bent down, kissing the bare skin of your shoulders. “YN…I’m close…haa…”

He could feel all the pleasure welling up inside of him. You were holding on to him like a vice grip, as if wringing him out of his seed and coaxing him to come inside you. Zhongli felt his dick twitch at the thought of filling you up, pushing him closer to his climax.

“Aahhh…so g-good….mmnn….! Zhongli…! I’m gonna—”

“My love…I-I…!”

—!

“Mama? Papa…?”

A knock at their door, followed by a small voice stopped the both of them in their tracks.

Oh no, not again…

Looking at each other, you and Zhongli immediately scrambled to compose yourselves.

“Yuqing…ah, please stay where you are—"

“Honey, just a second! Let me…let me just find my slippers—”

Hurriedly, you grabbed your discarded robe on the floor and put on your sandals, while your husband raced to the adjacent bathroom to relieve himself. “Love, I’ll be there in a moment. Please take Yuqing back to her room in the meantime,” was what he said.

As you opened the door, you were greeted by curious amber eyes—the same as her father’s—who seemingly stared at you as if trying to assess the situation. She was carrying her favorite plushie, a geovishap hatchling, for some reason, while you knelt down and caressed her cheeks gently.

“Yuqing? What’s wrong?” you asked her, “It’s way past your bedtime.”

“Something jumped from the window, Mama…! I…I don’t want to go back!” She replied, almost in a whisper as she held on to the plushie tightly.

Your daughter’s words immediately caught your attention. It could just be a squirrel, or maybe something more dangerous. Nevertheless, you have to go check it out.

“Alright, honey. Let’s see what it is,” you replied as you carried her on your arms. “Mama and Papa can easily hunt monsters down!”

Yuqing blinked at you. “Hm? But where’s Papa?”

“Oh, uh…he just needs to pee,” you replied awkwardly, not totally forgetting what you two were doing a while ago.

By the time you arrived at Yuqing’s bedroom, you were greeted by a calico cat which was carrying her own young into the room, staring at you both with scrutinizing eyes. It seemed to have taken a liking to the room and decided to take shelter there. You instantly knew what was the matter.

“It’s a mama cat!” Yuqing exclaimed happily, jumping from your grasps as you muttered “be careful!” at the ecstatic child.

“Don’t come too close to it, honey,” you told her, sitting on the bed as you watched your daughter crouch near the animal to observe it. “The mama cat doesn’t like it if you touch her kittens. She might scratch you.”

“Oh…” your daughter murmured disappointingly, and then returned to your side when she had enough watching.

Looking down to her, you could really see how much Yuqing resembled Zhongli—the same eyes, the same dignified yet gentle countenance. Her hair was a little lighter but it’ll probably turn as dark as Zhongli’s when she’s older. You smiled at the thought of watching your daughter grow—a few years ago, she was still so small and fragile as you held her for the first time, but now, she’ll be turning six, and then eleven, and then little will you know, she has become such a fine lady.

Pulling her into an embrace, you caught the child off guard as you smothered her with kisses.

“Mama!” She protested, but was giggling at the same time. “Mama…what are you doing!”

“I just love my dearest Yuqing!” you exclaimed, but then stopped to pat her head gently. “Now, are you still scared?”

The dark-haired girl shook her head with a smile. “I’m ok now, Mama! It was just a cat.”

“Alright,” you smiled as you began tucking her in again. “We’ll talk in the morning what we’ll do with the cat, but right now, it’s time for you to sleep. Little girls need to sleep for them to grow big, okay?”

“Understood! Good night then, Mama!” Yuqing replied underneath her blanket, as you gently soothed her head. The whole time, you continued to do it until she had finally fallen asleep, soft snores coming from the small child which made you smile warmly.

By the time you returned to your bedroom, you could see that the bathroom lights were still on. You were waiting for Zhongli to swing by Yuqing’s room earlier but for some reason, he’s been caught up in the bathroom this whole time. It also seemed like your husband had heard you enter the room and began calling for you.

“Dear…! Perhaps you could come here for a moment?”

Curious about what was going on, you then stepped into the bathroom and only to be greeted by a much larger, more draconic Zhongli. You could only stare at the large protruding horns on his head, the scales on his arms and legs, and the tail that was swinging back and forth between his legs. Not to mention the large thing on his crotch that made you do a double take at the mere sight of it.

Zhongli closed his eyes as soon as he noticed your stunned expression. Despite how he looks, he still had a bit of his self-control intact.

“YN, I think we have a problem here,” he told you as calmly as he could.

“I might be going into heat again.”

*

It was finally D-Day.

The both of you spent the last week trying to prepared for this, because unlike the first time, you had responsibilities. For one, Yuqing had to be taken elsewhere and away from the carnage. It will not bode well if your child is there while your husband is being one horny dragon.

The people both of you know where highly dangerous though. Among the rejected list was Childe, Hu Tao, and Venti, with the last one loudly lamenting how he couldn’t have fun with Yuqing in Mondstadt. Keqing and Ningguang would be great but they’re busy with work, while the adepti wouldn’t have enough skills and patience to babysit a child for a week, even if it was the child of the former geo archon. That’s why in the end, you asked Lumine and Aether to take care of your daughter for a while—they were at least, safe enough not to put Yuqing in danger. Hopefully.

On the other hand, you had to prepare yourself for another bang of your life. The first time had caught you off guard, but this time, you were prepared to satiate your half-dragon husband to the fullest. You had also prepared yourself to conceive another child. Well, you really were planning to, but it was the night when Yuqing interrupted you two.

“Dear?” A head peered into the kitchen—or rather, a head with two horns.

Zhongli’s dragon features seemed to be staying longer and longer the nearer his heat approaches. Luckily enough, it wasn’t much of a rare sight in Liyue.

“Oh, morning, Zhongli. Should I brew you some tea?” you asked, busying yourself with breakfast for your family of three.

“It’s alright. I’ll do it,” he replied as he stepped in beside you, preparing the hot water to be boiled.

For a while, the both of you stayed like this in silence. You were concentrating on not getting the congee burned while he was trying to get the proper temperature of the water.

In the end, it was Zhongli who broke the silence.

“Will you be alright later?”

You whipped your head to his direction. “H-huh? What? Me? Oh, I’ll be fine!”

“Are you sure?” he asked, turning to you and caressing your cheeks with the tip of his sharp claws. “If only I could assure you that it will be painless.”

“Zhongli,” you called his name firmly as you flipped an egg. “You have never hurt me, and you never will. I survived the first time, right? We have Yuqing running around after all.”

Your words seemed to have magically melted his worries away, no matter how tacky you thought there were. But you didn’t know that Zhongli simply needed your assurance that it will be okay, otherwise, he’d go into a spiral of worry. Comforted by your presence, he crept his arms around you, hugging you from your side.

“Ah, my wife…my lovely wife…” he muttered happily as he nestled his head on your shoulder, savoring your scent and your warmth. “You’re really my wife…”

You giggled at his sudden show of playfulness. “That I am, sir.”

For Zhongli to be this affectionate, it seemed his heat has really gotten to him. Normally, he’ll reserve these kinds of actions for the both of you late at night, but right now, he’s incredibly clingly and wouldn’t stop following you wherever you go. For the most part, he really loves taking in your scent and running his hands around your body.

Soon enough, you hear the loud and rapid padding of feet on the floor as it dashed towards the kitchen where the two of you were. In a few moments, Zhongli was face to face with his own daughter who grinned gleefully at him.

“Mama, Papa!” Yuqing exclaimed as she clung to you like her father.

“Now young lady, what brings you here early in the morning?” Zhongli asked mischievously, still hugging you and resting his chin on your shoulder.

“Lumine and Aether! They’re coming right? They’re coming!” she almost shouted, arm tightly adhered to your leg.

“In about half an hour, darling,” you replied. “Now, are you both aware that I’m trying to cook here? I can’t move!”

Instead of letting go however, Zhongli tightened his hold of you while nuzzling deeper on your shoulder while Yuqing did the same on your leg. You grumbled. “Like father, like daughter.”

Giggling, Yuqing glanced at her father who was tightly clinging to you like she was.

“Papa, do you like Mama?”

Zhongli, for a moment, smiled at her warmly before replying. “Very much so, my dear.”

You could only hide your flustered expression at his words. But of course, it made your heart skip a beat, even after marrying him and having his child, Zhongli could still make you feel this way with just a few words.

It was a good thing that Yuqing changed the subject before your heart could explode.

“Papa! You have horns!” she exclaimed and pointed at Zhongli’s head.

“Oh? Is this your first time seeing it?” he asked as he knelt to the floor. “Do you want to touch it?”

Zhongli could definitely see his daughter’s amber eyes sparkling with curiosity as she slowly inched her way closer to him. Yuqing may look like him, but she definitely has your temperament. The way she sees the world with so much wonder and excitement reminded Zhongli of you.

“Can I, Papa? Can I?” she asked, her small fingers reaching out for them.

“Yes, you may, my dear.”

Bending down, Zhongli felt Yuqing glide her fingers at smooth surface of the horns. “Be careful though, the tips should be sharp enough to wound you.”

Filled with wonder, the child gazed at Zhongli with amazement. “Papa, are you a dragon?!”

“I can become one.”

“Does…! Does that mean I can be a dragon too?!”

Aahh…You smiled at the two of them as you finished the last of your cooking. “Alright now. Let’s have breakfast. The twins will be here soon if we don’t hurry up!”

*

“Aether! Lumine!”

The dark-haired girl immediately ran towards the twins right after you opened the door to greet them, incredibly excited for the week ahead. Aether scooped her into his arms right away as Lumine pinched her cheek for being so adorable.

“We’re extremely grateful to you two for agreeing to take care of Yuqing,” you told them bashfully. “It was hard to think of anyone reliable and willing to do it in such a short notice.”

“It’s okay, YN,” Lumine replied, “We’d love to have Yuqing around anyway! Right, Aether?”

Distracted with playing with Yuqing, Aether turned to Lumine who was looking at him pointedly. “Huh? Oh! Oh yeah! We’re gonna play a lot!”

“Let’s play house again, Aether!” Yuqing interrupted, “I’ll be the mommy, Lumine will be the aunty and you’re the daddy!”

A large, tall shadow loomed over the twins from behind you. “I prefer if you’d arrange the designations in a different way.”

“Oh, Zhongli.” You turned to your husband who was menacing enough to make the male twin tremble like a leaf, especially in his half-dragon form.

“M-Mr. Z-Zhongli!” Aether immediately felt a chill run down his spine. If anything, he felt an overprotective dad is way scarier than all the monsters he battled so far.

“Good morning Mr. Zhongli,” Lumine greeted the man calmly with a smile. “You don’t have to worry about anything! Yuqing can be the mommy, I’ll be the daddy and Aether’s the dog.”

“Good.”

You could only smile awkwardly at the whole exchange. If this continues on, Zhongli might change his mind and insist his daughter to stay.

“Alright, here’s all her clothes for the week as well as other stuff she needs,” you interrupted as you shoved a bag on Lumine’s hands. “Please don’t hesitate to call us if something happens.”

Lumine only glanced at you with a plastered smile. Bothering them isn’t something she’d really want to do.

“We will, YN,” Aether replied and then exchanged looks with his sister. “I think it’s time for us to take off now though.”

“Alright. Come on, Yuqing, let mama and papa kiss you goodbye,” you told them as you reached out for your daughter who easily climbed out of Aether’s arms.

Crouching down, you and Zhongli embraced your daughter tightly, kissing her cheeks several times until she began protesting. With Zhongli chuckling, he patted her head gently while reminding her of several things.

“Now young lady, be of your best behavior. Don’t make Lumine and Aether worry too much.

“I will, Papa! Can I have almond tofu as a reward then?”

Zhongli smiled at her amusingly. “Alright. Do we have a contract then?”

“Yes! It’s a pinky promise!” Yuqing held out her pinky and linked it with Zhongli’s, who was careful not to scratch her with his claws.

“Don’t forget to drink your vitamins and eat your vegetables, ok? And sleep on time. Be careful not to go anywhere without telling Lumine or Aether!”

Yuqing sighed, “Yes, yes, Mama. I will.”

Ruffling her head, you finally kissed her forehead while Zhongli did the same.

“Don’t forget to have fun!”

As she ran off to Lumine’s side, the both of you stood up.

“We’ll be going then. See you after a week!” Aether exclaimed as they began to take the steps down the porch.

“Bye, bye, Mama, Papa!”

With that, the three of them disappeared and went off their way.

Glancing at your husband, it had finally dawned on you that this was only the beginning.

“So, should we get started?”

He asked, and you froze.

*

“W-wait…! Zhongli!”

“What’s the matter?”

Your husband asked you, as if he wasn’t pinning you against the wall, nuzzling against your neck as he took in your scent. You could feel his warm breath against your pulse, his hands on your waist as he continued to pepper small, faint kisses on your skin.

“It’s…it’s the middle of the day…a-and…and…!”

“You never had an issue with that… are you getting shy, my love?”

You could sense the teasing tone in his voice as he nibbled on your ear, without ever the intention of removing himself from you. Flustered, you pursed your lips as you bit down a moan.

“N-No, I’m not! It’s just…!”

“It’s just what?”

Zhongli smirked at your unexpected bashfulness, urging him to tease you more to see more of that adorable expression of yours.

“I-I mean, we just sent off Yuqing…and they might return or something—”

“Oh, they won’t.” Zhongli gave your jaw a small hickey. “Or at least I’m sure they are well aware not to bother us.”

“H-Huh…?”

Without furnishing you an answer, he simply knelt down before you and wrapped his arms around your thighs to hold you down. Looking down, you could see him smirking mischievously at you, making you gulp.

“Why don’t we get you ready, my love?”

Slipping his head underneath your skirt, you instantly felt his lips on your thighs as he kissed his way up towards your core. You could feel yourself melting at the heat of the situation; the sensation of his warm tongue prodding your clothed entrance.

“Z-Zhongli…! Mnhh…!”

Even with your underwear on, you could easily feel him stimulate your sensitive clit as he circled his tongue around before sucking it. Your knees buckled immediately as you found your hands holding on to his horns, careful not to pull too much.

“You’re so drenched here, YN,” he told you, his voice vibrating against your sensitive parts.

“D-Don’t say that! O-Ohh…! Fuck!”

You couldn’t even tell him off properly as soon as he slid of your underwear and began to tease your hole with his tongue. You could feel him go in and out as his warmth filled you up. But it wasn’t enough, of course. After getting a taste of the real thing, nothing could satiate you other than him.

“Zhongli…oh god! Ah—!”

Without stopping, he continued to lap on your juices and stimulate you until you were at the edge of orgasm. You could feel your legs grow weak and the only thing keeping you from falling to the floor was his tight grip on you as he ruthlessly ate you out like a hungry man.

Peeking from underneath your skirt, Zhongli watched as he gradually pushed you closer and closer to your climax. His bright amber eyes filled with lust as he stared at your half-lidded eyes and trembling lips; crying his name out loud over and over again. He wanted to take you then and there, push his cock inside you until you were filled to the brim; his hard on was excruciatingly painful inside his pants, but he had to be patient and get you ready for him.

“Come for me, love,” he muttered, circling his tongue around your clit once more and sucking it.

It only took an instant for you to shiver and tremble in pleasure as you felt your orgasm wash over you like a tidal wave. Your skin felt like a surge of electricity passed over you as your knees buckled and your arms held on to his shoulders to stop you from falling over.

Removing himself from underneath your skirt, Zhongli then scooped your weak figure and carried you on his arms towards the sofa. He had you sitting on his lap facing him while you encircled your arms around his shoulders and waiting for your high to calm down.

For a while, the both of you stayed like this. Zhongli kept on giving you small pecks on your neck and shoulders, slowly divesting you of your clothes as he went around your body. It was slow and sensual; unlike the first time he was in heat.

“H-Hey…you too…” you purred, kissing the underside of his jaw.

He only hummed at you; his hands busy with getting your skirt off of you. “Yes?”

“Let me undress you too.”

Zhongli reigned in his urges as soon as he heard your suggestion. His face flushed as he watched you slowly remove his tie and unbutton his shirt to reveal his toned chest. Groaning at the feeling of your hands on his bare skin, he knew he only had a few moments left before all his self-control could fly off the window. But it was incredible, he could only feel himself grow even harder.

Soon enough, you were already on the floor kneeling before him. Zhongli felt himself tense up at what you were about to do, but had to strength left to stop you from doing it. Silently, he watched as you glide your hands on his things and then to the prolific bulge on his pants. You could feel him poke you earlier while you were sitting on his lap, which gave you the idea of blowing him off.

Gradually, you undid his belt and pants and finally take out his monstrosity of a cock. Zhongli gave a guttural groan as he felt your hands pump his shaft tentatively, his claws biting at the soft leather of the sofa.

It wasn’t the first time you saw his cock, and while it was impressive in normal days, the one right before you was definitely befitting of a dragon. You hesitated.

H-how did this thing fit inside of me before?!

Nevertheless, you continued on. It was massive but it was definitely hot, seeing Zhongli sitting there in front of you with a flushed face and his cock out. Timidly, you gave the tip a small peck as you slowly allowed your tongue to glide over it.

“Y-YN…that’s…!”

Empowered by his reactions, you then licked the underside of his shaft until it was glistening wet with your saliva. Eventually, precum began to ooze out of the tip and curiously, you began licking it as well, sucking it in the process.

“Ughh…! F-fuck…YN…! I’m really—”

Trying to bob your head up and down, you could only fit so much of him inside your mouth as your jaw tried to accommodate his size. But you felt your core tighten up and become wet, thinking that this cock will eventually fill you up to the brim with his cum.

Zhongli was rapidly losing it. He wanted to cum, but he wanted to cum inside of you and have you bear his child. He wanted to see your cunt filled with his seed until it oozes out of you, and then plug his cock back inside of you to fill you up once again.

No, this won’t do.

“YN…! Y-YN…! P-Please stop! Mnnh—!”

He held your chin to make you stop—the way your lips left a trail of saliva to his dick tempted him push it back inside your mouth—but he had to end it there, right before he came inside your mouth. Slowly he guided you towards him; confused as to why he stopped you right before he was about to come, you moved back to his lap where he gently caressed you and wiped his fluids from your cheeks.

“Let me kiss you, my love.”

In a soft and gentle kiss, Zhongli captured your lips. You could feel it radiating with love and warmth as he slid his lips over yours, his tongue darting inside, as if trying to fill his senses of you and only you. You both kissed until your lips were swollen, until you felt him rub his shaft against you unconsciously, making you moan in the kiss.

“Z-Zhongli…” you gasped for air. “Are you…holding yourself back?”

With those amber eyes, he gazed at you seriously—all the while keeping your lips closed to his.

“Is it a sin to treasure you so much?”

His words caught you off guard, but eventually, you smiled. Zhongli never failed to express his love for you. He was gentle and kind, a good husband and an even better father. Brushing a few stray locks of hair from his sweat-riddled face, you kissed his forehead as a way to show how much you appreciated his thoughtfulness.

“Thank you for thinking about me, Zhongli,” you remarked, “But right now, I really want you to let loose and fill me up completely with you.”

With eyes blown wide, Zhongli felt himself twitch at your words—his arousal no longer hidden. Grabbing the back of your head, he then crashed his lips against yours in a searing kiss lidden with passion and lust. He bit and licked on your lips while his hand groped your full breasts, pinching at your nipples to make you gasp against his lips.

“Then so be it,” he smirked. “I’ll make you completely mine.”  

Guiding his shaft to your slick entrance, he pushed himself inside of you in one go—making you squeal at the sudden sensation of being penetrated. It took some time for you to accommodate his large cock, but eventually, your cunt was drenched so much that it hadn’t become much of an issue.

“Z-Zhongli…! Oh god—fuck! …s-so big…!”

You began riding him, moving up and down on his lap while Zhongli continued to make you feel good by playing with your breasts. You could feel his sharp claws make indentations on your skin, but not hard enough to draw blood, but it was a strange sensation which only heightened the pleasure of having his dragon cock thrusted inside of you.

“Hnnghh!! Y-YN…!” Zhongli winced at the sudden tightness, and began to distract himself from cumming by licking on your pert nipples until they were red and sensitive.

With pleasure attacking you from different parts, you could only mewl as Zhongli gradually turned you into a lewd mess as you felt him twitch inside of you. Soon enough, he’ll be cumming inside of you, and that would the first among many others for this entire week. If his first heat said anything, Zhongli wouldn’t stop mating with you until you were fertilized with his seed.

The thought did nothing but coax you to your climax. You could feel yourself tighten around him as he pounded into you mercilessly, your juices mixing together. Zhongli was also close. He was already extremely aroused, and it wouldn’t take long for him to climax.

“A-Ah—! YN….! L-love…I’m…I’m close…!”

He muttered with face flushed and breath ragged.

“Yes…! Oh god, yes…! P-Please, Zhongli…! Ah—! F-fill me…fill me up…!”

In just a few thrusts, the both of you came at the same time. He pushed deep inside of you and came; his warmth filling you up until he was spent. You were still shivering with pleasure when he pulled you in for a kiss, his tongue once again ravishing you with so much intensity that it could be argued that he made you come once again with just a kiss.

Reeling in from the afterglow, you could still feel him hot and hard inside of you, as his breathed hard against your neck. You were no different though—the way your mind was still covered with a haze of lust, or the way his cock inside of you felt so good as it hit a particularly good spot. The aphrodisiac you got from Dr. Baizhu seemed to be quite effective.

Removing yourself from his embrace, you staggered to stand up with your limp legs, but managed to crawl on fours right beside him.

Zhongli was both bewildered and disappointed to have your warm body away from him, but when you pushed your ass before him and gazed at him with sultry eyes, he felt his heart rate pick up the pace.

It was embarrassing to show your cunt dripping with your juices and his cum, but you didn’t really care much. You were too entrenched with arousal to feel embarrassment.

“Z-Zhongli…let’s…let’s do it again…?”

Grabbing your ass, he spread you out even more, and even slapped your butt lightly. Zhongli could definitely see his cum dripping out of you and promptly scooped it up with his finger and pushed it back inside of you.

“P-Please…! Zhongli…I—!”

He smirked. “Very well.”

Without warning, he slid himself back inside of you; making you bite back the remaining words. It felt incredible having him inside. It was hot, as if you were burned and electrified at the same time. Your mouth hardly had the time to close as he continued to piston in and out of you.

This time however, Zhongli began playing with your oversensitive clit, groaning loudly at how you tightened your walls around him. You squealed in delight as his cock hit a particularly good spot, making you cum sooner than expected.

“Oh…o-oh god! Z-Zhongli….! Zhongli…! A-ah…!”

Yet despite your premature climax, he continued on—thrusting inside of you and prolonging your orgasm. It was so good you could feel tears pooling the side of your eyes as he plowed your sensitive cunt.

“You came, didn’t you?” he asked, his lips once again on yours. “I’ll make you come again soon enough.”

True to his promised, Zhongli picked up his pace and fucked you as roughly as he could. You knew there will be bruises after this but the pleasure was greater than anything for you to care about. The way his cock just fills you up, hitting your g-spot over and over again relentlessly, or the way his groans just sends shivers down your spine.

“F-Fuck…! Fuck…!Z-Zhongli! I’m—! I’m gonna…!”

“Yes, love...! Haa….come for me…! I’ll fill you up with my seed…”

Once again, you came from the overstimulation—your arms failing as the pleasure was greater than anything you experienced so far.

“F-fuck…YN…a-ah—!”

With that, Zhongli suddenly bit your shoulder as he pumped more of his seed inside of you, which only overflowed from your hole. You mewled at the mixture of pain and pleasure, unable to distinguish the one from the other, but you knew it felt extremely good.

Zhongli was silent for a while as he lapped on the bitemarks he had made. He was glad that he hadn’t bit too hard, but for some reason, he also liked how you were marked as his.

“Allow me to take you to the bedroom,” he whispered to you as you nodded your head groggily. Sleep was beginning to approach you fast.

Unsheathing himself from you, you winced at the sudden feeling of emptiness. But it was immediately remedied by the feeling of his warm body near you as he carried you to your shared bedroom. Slowly, he laid you down on the soft mattress and eventually joined you there, embracing you from the back.

“Let’s rest for now,” he muttered right before your eyelids fell heavy. “We’ll need it for later.”

And he was right.

For the next few days, the two of you tainted every room inside the house (well, except for Yuqing’s bedroom).

From the kitchen where Zhongli fucked you from behind, bending you on the counter as he emptied himself inside of you—to the bathroom where cleaning up turned into another round where he slowly entered you while underwater—or on the floor, which was only because you couldn’t reach the bed because he was too horny for his own good.

It was only then, as the both of you rested from the last round which took all night and early morning, that you realized how much time had passed.

“Mama! Papa! I’m back!”

Your eyes shot open, and glanced at Zhongli who was staring at you as well.

“Oh no.”

[leggomylino]

Vibe So Hot | Han Jisung

Genre: Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Han Jisung x fem!reader

AU: neighbor au, prank war au

Word Count: ~11.7k

Warning(s): mild language (censored)

A/N: inspired by the song “Vibe So Hot,” Priscilla Ahn

ღ Stray Kids M.List | M.List ღ

-〤〤〤-

There were times when you weren’t really sure about Han Jisung. 

The day you moved from your parent’s house into your new home, life was a dream. A delight. A living fantasy. You and your closest friend of twenty-odd years had been visualizing it for ages- a home for just the two of you, where you could make and break all the rules you wanted, eat dinner out of the cookie jar, throw paint and crayon all over the walls, and dump all the grease, homework, and leftover brussel sprouts down the garbage disposal that you wanted. It would be your kingdom with the two of you at equal pedestal on the throne, and no one could say or do anything about it.

While your visuals and ideals did change over time, what with hormones and taxes and a general understanding of how the world worked, you and F/n never stopped dreaming of the day you each held one half of the kingdom between your fingers. One half of freedom. It was a blissful, beautiful Tuesday morning. Exactly five months ago. Birds chirping in the small tulip trees. The sweet spring breeze ruffling the surrounding azaleas. The simple but water-efficient sprinkler system the two of you had worked a summer job to afford that was...spraying…...coke… 

...Yes, it had been a beautiful Tuesday morning. And also the arrival of hell next door.

“HAN JISUNG!” you yelled, banging on your neighbor’s front door. “Han Jisung, I know you’re home!” You stamped your foot. “Open this door right now!”

It was now five months later. Five months since you’d moved into your dream home, something small and sweet and affordable that you and your friend worked hard for years to achieve. Just something small to start the two of you out, while you finished up school and figured out what the heck the two of you wanted to do with the rest of your lives. 

It had easily become five months of back-and-forth hell. “HAN JISUNG!!!”

Click. The door slowly creaked open. It was dark inside, far too dark for 2 pm, like something out of a horror movie.

Oh, but you weren’t falling for another one of his tricks. Not this time. “Han Jisung, I know you’re there…” You called...weakly. “C-Come out this instant. I know it was you who stuffed cereal into the birdfeeder and left glue on the door handles. I was almost late for work this morning and F/n is stuck on the back porch.”

There was no response. You agitatedly sighed, running a hand through your hair and taking a handful of strands with you thanks to the faint remainder of krazy glue that simply wouldn’t come off.

“Han,” you called, poking your head inside. “Han? Han Jisun-”

The moment you stepped inside, a loud whrr! resounded, your body hoisting upwards. You spun around in the flimsily thin netting, falling into a fetal position backwards.

Han and a few of his cronies came out cackling at your expense, watching you gently spin and sway in their ridiculous trap. “I caught Y/n!” one of them cheered. “That’s 1,000 points.”

Another scoffed. “You didn’t do anything,” he said, blowing long blonde locks out of his face. “The points go to me for setting up the...project.”

“Shouldn’t they go to Han?” Yet another asked. “It’s his house.”

You rolled your eyes, attempting to adjust. Han tromped over proudly and swung his arm around the boy. “Exactly!” he cheered, pinching his cheek. “I’m glad you see it my way.”

The kid squinted his fox-like features in disgust, shoving the ringleader away from him. Han merely laughed, smirking up at you next. He sent a flirtatious wink your way. You scoffed.

“S’up, gorgeous?”

“Drop dead.”

“Ouch,” he playfully winced, pretending to take literal damage. “Didn’t like the glue, or the cereal? I told Hyunjin no one wanted his bland raisin garbage. But,” He shrugged. “He insisted it was good for the birds. The raisins, anyway-”

“Screw you,” Goldilocks groaned. “Shove off, I never said I ate the stuff. I just said it was better than wasting Lucky Charms or something actually good.”

“...Yeah, so there’s that.” He spared a passing eye roll before putting back on his deceitfully charming smile. Disgusting. “What brought you to swing by? Just dropping in?”

The other boys laughed again, causing you to turn an annoying shade of pinkish-red, some cross between coral and rouge. “I don’t have to tell you anything!” you snapped in your anger.

Unfortunately, Han Jisung needed to know the facts. “Then...how am I supposed to help you? Oh, oh! Hold on a minute.” He simpered. “Are you maybe trying to tell me that you came by unannounced because...you wanted to get caught up in my web?”

Han’s crew all made catcalls and whistles along with nervous smiles and suggestive expressions. The nerve of him. You fought yourself into an upright position, clawing angrily at the seams. “I meant you already know what you did wrong! Get me out of this stupid thing and get over to my house so you can fix it.”

“Oooo,” A freckled-faced boy you recognized as Felix cooed. He’d often been a leading officer in many of Han’s classic pranks and schemes. “I think she wants you bro.”

The heat on your face was intensifying, whether from rage or embarrassment, you didn’t care. Your prison shook. “That’s not what I-”

“Well then,” Han (classically) interrupted. “Guess I better get over there and fix it.” He wiggled his eyebrows in a salacious manner, padding around the clamour of boys and taking the stairs three at a time like a gazelle. When he reached the top, he revealed a rope from around the corner, lowering you gently...at first.

After three careful tugs, he dropped the rope entirely. Your eyes went wide, screaming as you fell--

...Right into Han Jisung’s arms. The boy glided down the stair rail and caught you at the last possible second. “Plenty of time to spare,” he insisted, showing you his teeth.

You slapped them away, wrestling your way back to your feet. “...You’re such an asshole, Han Jisung,” You dusted yourself off, smoothing out your attire single handedly. “I--”

...You yanked your hand down. Away from his face. Hard. Harder.

It was stuck. Your hand was stuck to his cheek. Krazy glue.

“OW! Ow ow ow okay! That hurts! Sh*t!” He cursed. You rolled your eyes, kicking his leg. 

“That’s what you get for gluing my door! Now come on!”

To make things less awkward, you gripped his left ear, yanking him like a mother would a misbehaving child. The others crowded around and followed, laughing as—

The door slammed in their face. “OW!” You heard Hyunjin yelp. His watered-down image through the distorted window showed him covering his nose, the other two goons frantically asking if he was okay.

...Well, Felix did, anyway. Fox-face merely stared and shook his head a little. “Let’s go. You’re cleaning the glue off both doors and changing out the birdfeeder. If you screw it up, you’re buying me a new one.” A harsh gaze fell over your shoulder. “After you unstick F/n!”

Han grunted, his groans and whines a feeble echo of white noise along with the ridiculous passes he occasionally made on the way over.

-〤〤〤-

After spending an hour and a half watching Han unstick glue from around your house (after unsticking your hand from his face) and taking a trip down to the hardware store for a new birdfeeder that 100% came out of his pocket, you sighed, trudging yourself through the front door and collapsing onto the nearest sofa by a front-facing window. You leered, observing Han shuffle up his own walkway and exchange harsh words with his friends before they all piled inside.

That bastard. He was always coming after you, ever since you first moved into the neighborhood. After the first week of assaults (from moving day) you’d asked the other neighbors if any of them had any bad experiences from house 117, but they all gave a generally same response: “Who, Han Jisung? Oh, heavens no! He’s such a nice boy! A little quirky, sure, but such a nice boy! ...Are you sure it wasn’t a raccoon or a stray cat?”

Heh, yeah. Like a stray cat was capable of impersonating your friend to have the locks on your house changed. Didn’t they have to do security checks for that stuff?!

Speaking of locks, the sound of keys ricocheted from your left, and you turned your head to see F/n enter...very strangely. They looked spooked, their eyes wide as they turned their head this way and that, creeping into the house like an Egyptian wall painting.

“Is the cost clear?” they asked. “Is he gone? Nothing’s missing? Nothing’s amiss?”

“Relax, F/n,” you said, scratching your head. You desperately needed a shower, but that had been rather hard with the pipes spewing nothing but Mr. Pibb for the past three days. It’d apparently be a fourth until they cleared out. “The menace is gone, back to his evil layer. I made sure he cleaned up his mess and got him to replace your grandmother’s birdfeeder.”

F/n scowled, back to normal as they tromped into the room, throwing their bags down. “She made that birdfeeder from scratch, Y/n. With her own two arthritis riddled hands, that birdfeeder may as well have been an ancient relic. It was one of a kind.”

“I know, I know,” you insisted, peacefully trying to calm them down. “Just relax. I got it under control and taken care of.”

“You said that last time. Now look at the place.”

You looked around. “...It looks spotless. Han actually did a really nice job with that extra work he put in.”

“Well it wasn’t before! ...Wait, you let him into the house?!”

Whoops. “Only to do some extra chores. To make up for outside. And many other times he’s screwed us over.”

Your friend grabbed the sides of their hair, practically seething. They regarded you like you’d gone insane, and they were just on the brink. “Y/n have you lost your mind? Are you stupid? I thought you were smart! What was that 3.5 GPA for?!”

“Hey, GPA isn’t everything. It’s just a matter of getting on a teacher’s good side and paying attention. Also, I’m aware that...that may have not been the best move. But it’s fine!” you insisted, now following your friend into the kitchen. “I was watching him the whole time. He didn’t leave my line of sight once!”

F/n opened the fridge, glaring perplexedly. “...Not once?”

“......” 

You thought. Oh wait...well…

You smiled sheepishly. “...Actually...ahaha...he may have asked to go to the bathroom once…”

F/n’s jaw dropped. “And you let him?!”

Your hands found their way into the air. “What was I supposed to do, F/n? Follow him into the bathroom? That’s creepy and gross and uncalled for.”

Your friend grabbed a beer from the fridge, slamming the door shut after. “No, Y/n. You tell him to go next door and use his bathroom.”

“But what if it was an emergency?”

“I think he can hold it.”

“But what if he couldn’t?”

They paused just beside you, giving you a harsh glare. “After all he’s done? I’d say that’s a real shame and another mess he’d have to clean up.”

“F/n--!”

“NO, Y/N,” Your friend of twenty-odd years turned to you, making it halfway back to the front door. “You don’t get it! It has been five years--”

“Five months.”

“...It has felt like I have had my guard up for five years. I can’t relax in my own home. I can’t relax at work, I can’t relax at school-- I can’t relax anywhere!” They polished off the beer, crumbling the can and tossing it aimlessly into the kitchen. You ducked, the can soaring over your left ear and colliding with a kitchen cabinet. “URGH!”

They grabbed their bags, beginning to march out. You were faster, sliding on sock-clad feet across Han-polished floors to beat them to it, blocking the exit. “F/n, listen. Please. I agree it’s bad, but I think you’re overreacting just a little.”

“Overreacting?! …” S/he crossed his/her arms, glaring at you skeptically and in disbelief. “Okay, fine. Which bathroom did he use?”

“Huh?”

“Which bathroom?”

You swallowed, thinking again. “...Uh...the upstairs one.”

F/n deadpanned. Cold and hard. “Great. Thank you for that. All my school supplies are up there. My office and workspace is up there. That’s where I sleep, Y/n.” You blinked. 

“You sleep in your office?”

“URGH!”

They pushed you aside, storming into the wide, open world. Hysterically you followed, snagging your keys off the side table by the front door and making sure to lock up behind you. “F/n- ...F/n wait…! Ah, stupid locks…!”

“Don’t follow me, Y/n!”

“WAIT!”

“I SAID DON’T FOLLOW ME!”

From the corner of your eye, a silhouette of dark brown hair and overly-white teeth made its way toward your property line. “Hello F/n, Y/n.” The careful fall breeze blew the shade from his eyes, where evil and mischief still resided. “Having a little back and forth banter, are we? A disagreement, perhaps?”

Han-bleeping-Jisung. Your vision narrowed, a scowl aimed directly at him. When he was around, it’s all you could focus on. Your senses heightened, and not in a good way. He couldn’t be trusted.

You shouldn’t have let him into your house. Your sensors were picking up on something. He seemed too happy for someone that was just forced into doing chores in a house that wasn’t their own. And willing so…

A hot vibe was residing along the back of your neck, between your shoulder blades. A sinking, sensationally bad feeling. “What can we help you with, Han?”

“Oh,” he piped, brows raised. “We’re on a single name basis now. That’s rare.”

F/n cast him a dark look and continued down the sidewalk to their car. You sighed, trying to relax and having little success; F/n was right, it was hard to remain calm with a hellion next door. “What do you need?”

Han Jisung shoved his hands in his pockets. “Need is a strong word. I need a lot of things. Food, water, air--”

A groan escaped your lips. “Fine. Forgive me. What do you want?”

“Hmmm…” He smirked, listing his head. “I want a lot of things, princess. Depends what you’re referring to.”

You’re pretty sure you could hear the gag coming from F/n’s car as they started the engine, shifting into reverse. Han chuckled, letting you know he heard it too.

“Alright, fine.” He held his hands up in surrender. “You caught me. I came to warn you.”

“Warn me about what?”

“......” He pursed his lips. “...I may have gotten a bit carried away and...well, I couldn’t resist, really. But I was thinking and, maybe it was in bad taste. Since Hyunjin did break your grandmother’s bird-thing.”

A rustling came from the bushes. “That wasn’t me! That was you!”

Han cringed, turning over his right shoulder. “Shhh!”

You faltered, zoning in on Han’s shrubbery. “Who is that? Is that Hyunjin hiding in your flowers?”

Han rolled his eyes, tossing...some junk from his pockets. A coin or something. “I told you not to say a word!” 

Blonde hair revealed itself from the viburnum bushes on Han’s property. “Cattywampus.”

“I SAID TO SHHH!”

Hyunjin scoffed. “Oh, so when we’re playing Scrabble, it’s not a word. But now that we’re probing Y/n for information, all of a sudden, it’s a word!” 

The air left your lungs, quite dramatically, and you took a step back farther into the safety of your porch. “...What is he talking about? What information?”

Tensions spiked like never before. Han simply groaned. “Dammit...thanks a lot, Hyunjin.” He turned to you with a sour face. “Yeah, okay, whatever, just...I wanted to know when your birthday was.”

He shrugged, trying to pull off the most innocent, blow-it-off look possible. You weren’t buying it. “What were you saying before? What did you do to my house?”

“Oh yeah,” He clasped his hands behind his back, sending another classic trademarked wink your way. Hyunjin freed himself from the viburnum flowers, along with Fox-face, who’d gotten himself tangled up in the next-door rose bush; he tripped over an illy placed hoolahoop and ran into Hyunjin, the two of them taking turns removing literal thorns from their sides. “I left you a present inside.”

I left you a present inside.

I left you a present inside.

He left you a present inside your house. A surprise. A bad one. You had invited him into your living space, your relaxation hub where relaxation was scarce, and gave him just enough alone time to leave something behind.

Something terrible. Something rotten.

Han Jisung was no longer looking like Han Jisung to you; what you saw before you was his true form: a plotting, overzealous, sadistic little impish demon of a man, no...a demon pretending to be a man. Someone like Han Jisung couldn’t possibly be human. There was no love at all in his heart.

“F/N!” You yelled, chasing after them as they drove down the street. “F/N, WAIT! STOP THE CAR! PLEASE!!!”

You could feel Han Jisung’s eyes as he trailed you all the way down Maple Street, his friends watching as F/n hit the brakes a hundred feet shy of the stop sign and let you clamber in the back. 

“Step on it.”

S/he nodded, slamming the accelerator and getting the two of you safely out of Dodge. “I’m going to a friend’s house. I have to return a few things I borrowed before Han Hellion ruins them,” They looked over their shoulder. “Where are you headed?”

Your eyes glared proudly through the rearview mirror. F/n drew back, nervously looking between you and the road unassured.

But there was nothing for it. They could yell and pitch a fit at you later. Today, this very moment, everything was going to end.

“The craft store,” you said. “And you’re coming with me.”

“What?”

“We’re taking our house back.”

“......”

The car rolled to a stop at the cross section of Water and Runway Boulevard. If it was the friend you were thinking of, F/n would have to make a right here. Your local craft store was the opposite direction.

With a unanimous nod through the rearview, the two of you made a left down Water Street.

-〤〤〤-

Hobby Lobby had to be your favorite store, next to Fye’s Music Records where you occasionally went for your music collection and your favorite restaurant. ...Though a store wasn’t really a restaurant, and vice-versa.

You and F/n scoured the many aisles of arts and crafts, decor and gifts, candles and knick-knacks, searching high and low for everything on a messy-scribbled list the two of you put together in the parking lot. Revenge was going to be so sweet. Total bliss.

“Buckets?” A young employee repeated back to you. “Yes, let’s see, they should be near the back of the store, on the right-hand side. If you pass the glitter and pipecleaners, you’ve gone too far. I believe they’re on Aisle 13.”

“Thanks,” F/n said, grabbing your wrist and dragging you behind them. They almost seemed more excited about this whole revenge-war than you did. “Aisle 10...Aisle 11...Aisle--”

S/he stopped, pale-stricken. “What is it?” You tried peering around the corner. “What’s wrong? Are they sold out or somethi--”

Your heart nearly stopped. There, in the middle of the aisle, stood Lee Felix, perusing a wide selection of glitter glue. A bucket (not a basket) hung from slack fingers, carrying a barrage of other craft equipment as well as a plastic bag from the Home Depot next door.

Some kind of rage was flooding through your system. You could sense it in F/n as well. The two of you were in sync, fed up with the Hellion Clan’s crazy antics and batsh*t ideas that only brought you pain and suffering. Enough was enough.

You practically shoved your friend aside. “LEE FELIX!”

Felix jumped, startled, frantic, eyes zooming in on you like a deer in headlights.

Then, unlike a deer in headlights, he ran.

“AFTER HIM!” F/n cried, shoving the list in their pocket. S/he ran farther towards the front of the store to block the entrance, while you followed in hot pursuit of the freckled boy’s trail.

Your phone buzzed as you ran, and without taking your eyes off your target you shuffled it out of your purse, slamming the receive button a little too hard. “What?!”

“He’s going towards the back of the store! He’s heading for the emergency exit!”

You gave a quizzical look toward your friend’s voice coming out of your phone, then back at your target’s backside. “What? How do you know that? Where are you?!”

“Look up. Aisle 1. Holiday crafts.”

Carefully your eyes scanned the tops of the shelves near the entrance, and after doing a double take on a statue you found F/n squatting among some Santa Claus and Christmas angels, a pair of high-grade binoculars in their mits.

You had no idea when they’d gotten those. “Where did you get those from?! How the heck did you get up there?”

“That’s not important right now! Just SEIZE HIM! He’s getting away, run faster!”

With an aggravated grunt you hung up, shoving your phone away and pushing your legs to hit the tile twice as hard. Some twenty feet in front of you Felix squeaked, making a surprise turn down Aisle 2 and knocking over a stack of decorative boxes. You cursed, calling forth your skills from high school gym to hurdle yourself over the monstrosity and skid to a temporary halt before barreling down the half-storage half-Christmas decor aisle. 

“He’s getting away!” F/n yelled. “Move!!!”

“Why don’t you help me?!” You called back. Felix made a 90 degree turn, charging farther back into the store in the opposite way you were anticipating; unless…  

A store manager suddenly appeared at the end of the aisle, holding her hand out to stop you. “Excuse me, I don’t think so; there’s no horseplay allowed in the store.”

Though she tried to grab you, you dodged like a badass, perrying right, then left, then spiraling after a mop of retreating orange hair down Aisle 7. “Can’t! Sorry! I’ll pay for this later!”

“I’m sorry?!”

“Hold that thought!”

The sound of static and muffled voices crackled behind you as the manager called for backup, but you didn’t care. This would all be over once the little coral pipsqueak was in your grasp; you’d make sure to make him sing everything that was going on.

“LEE FELIIIIIX!”

Somewhere on the opposite side Felix squealed, either running into something or barricading another path to ensure his freedom. You slid to another halt, straining your ears to pick up on the sound.

Maybe you could sneak up on him. You were getting pretty tired, and running all over the store wasn’t a very good strategy for either side. Tiptoeing down Aisle 6, buttons and sewing equipment, you held your breath, carefully peering down both directions of the aisle.

Empty, minus a mom and her kid. You dropped down on all fours, crawling to the next aisle-- except--

“Ow!” you hissed, pricking yourself on something sharp. It was a discarded sewing needle.

It gave you an idea. After sucking on the injury a moment, you snagged the discarded object, pinning it to the side of your bag. 

You hopped to your feet and gathered the strongest thread and yarn you could. After diving into a pile of fabrics when a few security guards walked by, you got back to work setting up your ingenious idea. A little thread here. Some fabric there. A weight right here…

You quickly sewed (loosely) a few strips of fabric together, finally finishing your creation. “Sorry, this aisle is closed right now,” you said to a few customers, spreading slime over each end of the hall. It was showtime. “I’m ready,” you told F/n, uttering the words through your phone.

F/n had done well to keep their disguise as an oddly-put Santa, peering through their binoculars when no one was looking. “Okay. I sort of lost him after the cops started lurking by here. Let’s see…”

Another curse left your lips. “He didn’t leave, did he?”

“No, I didn’t hear the doors open or close. He’s gotta still be here somewhere…..aha!” Their cry made you jump. “Found him!”

“Where?!”

“Opposite side. Aisle 18. He’s hiding around the picture frames.”

“Dang it,” you groaned, “I need him over here!” You looked around hesitantly. “Can you get him over to this side? I’m on Aisle 7. Additional Sewing and Craft Supplies. Fabrics, yarn, etc.”

“I’m scared to leave my post, but…” F/n sighed. “...I guess if you have a plan, I can chase him that way.”

“Great, okay. Hurry.”

“Roger.”

You hung up, taking another deep breath. Waiting. Ducking when the cops circled back around.

Suddenly, you heard a familiar battle cry from the other side of the store, followed by a man’s scream. The security guards and management started racing that way, but by the time they’d get there the source would be long gone…

Because he was headed straight for your trap. You scaled to the top of the aisle, keeping low with a blanket of fabric over your head as you watched Lee Felix weave in and out of craft stands and passing customers, buzzing toward Aisle 7 like a bee to a honey hive.

“RwARGH!” F/n cried, their Santa disguise flying with a full-powered shove. Felix went plunging for the nearest aisle, your aisle, and the moment his sneakers hit Elmer’s Color Slime Kit, he slipped, spinning out of control right into the giant DIY net you created. Yes! Score!

“HIYAH!” You screamed, jumping off the aisle shelf and tackling him. Gave over. You’d won. 

Felix squirmed and fought with all the strength he had left in him, his abs, his arms, his quads, but alas, twice his body weight from you and your friend combined was more than enough to stop him. He gave out with a long sigh just as an employee rounded the corner, crying for assistance.

You were out of time. Tying his hands behind his back and bundling the rest of the fabric around him, your friend threw a couple twenties from their pocket at the young man before the two of you slipped out the emergency exit.

“You’re going to tell us everything!” You demanded, carrying his torso. Felix scowled, rolling his eyes. Despite his obvious anger, he was sweating bullets and looked rather afraid. 

“I’m not telling you anything. You made me drop my stuff.”

“You can go back for it later. F/n, open the door.”

F/n shook their head, placing your captive’s feet down and unlocking the back of their car. “Nuh-uh. He’s riding back here.”

“In the trunk?!” The boy cried.

“In the trunk.”

F/n was dead serious. You stifled a laugh, even if it was kind of mean. Felix whined and bowed his head as the two of you placed him inside, F/n smacking a bow on his head that’d stuck to them during the chase.

“Okay. Let’s get out of here.”

The two of you slammed the door shut.

-〤〤〤-

The moment light hit your captive’s eyes, he squinted, groaning from the bumpy ride (as F/n insisted on hitting every speed bump and pothole). Lifting the boy on the count of three, he made sure to cry out for help- “HAN!!! HYUNJIN!!! JEONGIN!!! I’M OVER HERE!!!”- but, as it was expected, F/n simply dropped the boy on the driveway and threatened to stomp over a...delicate area...before smirking at his wide-eyed response and stuffing the bow in his mouth.

“Um, F/n…” You muttered, hoisting your prize up the porch steps, “don’t you think maybe you’re being too-”

“Don’t,” they warned, casting you a glare. “I’m not being too anything. These jerks deserve way worse.” They shifted Felix’s weight in order to allow you room to open the door. “Besides, it’s not like we’re gonna torture him or anything. Just ask a few questions.”

Felix gave a sigh of relief.

“...We can figure out what to do with him after that.”

...He took a sharp breath, beginning to sweat.

Inside the house the two of you tossed Felix onto the couch, running around the lower level to gather equipment before shifting him to a dining room chair. You were adjusting his bindings when the phone rang, F/n scampering off to answer it after sharing a look.

They smirked at the familiar caller I.D. “Y/n and F/n residence,” S/he answered in an overly-pleasant tone. “How may I help you?” Quickly they pulled the phone away, placing it down on speaker. The two of you, and Felix, glared at the voice coming out from the other side.

“We know you have him,” Han’s voice echoed throughout the living room. He sounded serious, demanding almost, sending a shiver down your spine. That was new. “What do you want?”

“Oh, what do we want?” F/n asked. They scoffed, peering out the blinds on the opposite side of the fireplace, just next to the kitchen. Directly at Han’s estate. “That’s something you don’t hear everyday.”

Han huffed, sounding disgusted. Suddenly, Felix erupted, spitting out the bow you’d forgotten to secure. “HAN! HAN I’M OKAY!!! BUT I LOST THE STUFF AT--”

Frantically you pounced, stuffing a fistful of Kleenex in his mouth. A chorus of anxious whispers filled the other line from Jisung and his goons, before Han silenced them and got back to business.

“Felix, if you can hear me, it’s okay. I need you to take one for the team right now until I come up with something.”

Ironically and unneeded, Felix nodded, as if Han could see him. You and F/n rolled your eyes. 

Suddenly, a loud splat! sent them squealing backwards. 

Your jaw dropped, watching rotten egg dribble and creep down your immaculately-just-cleaned window. Felix chuckled, falling on a sour note after you elbowed him. When two more assaults hit, you ducked for unnecessary cover behind Felix, F/n plastering themselves against the fireplace. 

“What do we do?!” you whispered, cringing every time an egg bomb made contact with the glass. What if by some crazy law of nature those things actually broke the window and leaked into the house?! It could take days to get the smell out. Heck, given that it was right next to the fireplace, and you had yet to test the installation of the seams...it’d likely start leaking into the house within the coming hours.

The pelts were slowly getting louder, rising in a horrifically drawn-out crescendo. “GIVE HIM BACK! GIVE HIM BACK!” you heard the goons chanting.

Were they on the roof?! You couldn’t bear this much longer. Your house was being eggified. Sullied. Disgraced. Finally cracking under the pressure, you flew some hand signals F/n’s direction that didn’t really mean anything and army-crawled to a yet-to-be-ambushed window, examining the battle situation outside before rolling back to your feet and sprinting for a backroom.

“Where are you going?!” F/n whispered harshly. S/he and Han bantered back and forth a bit, his demands of Felix’s release rattling the warfront before you returned with exactly what you’d been looking for: a megaphone. Ah, camp counselor days.

F/n saw what you were doing and instantly, wildly, vehemently shook their head no. But you were taking matters into your own hands now. 

“Han Jisung,” you stated, loudly enough so your voice could travel over the massive egg-pelting outside. “Hold your fire and I’ll bring Felix outside.”

You waited a few seconds, and the firing stopped. Han’s voice practically purred over the speaker. Very disgusting. “You’re starting to see things my way. That’s good.”

“Oh yes. I’m most certainly starting to see things your way.” The phone lifted between your fingers. “We’ll meet on the roofs in five minutes. If I hear or see one more egg on my property, the meeting is off.”

“......” There was an uncomfortable silence on the other line. 

You tilted your head. “Han Jisung? No deal?”

Felix whined a few feet behind you. Han sighed, clearly hearing it. “...Fine. We’ll meet you there.” Click.

You tossed the phone to F/n, who scarcely caught it, juggling it a few times on nervous butterfingers. “Alright, look,” s/he said, pacing across the room and slamming it down on the receiver. “I don’t know what kind of cockameme scheme you have planned, but…”

You smiled. “Don’t worry. I know what I’m doing.”

They sighed exasperatingly. “I’m sure you told yourself that when you let him into the house earlier, too.”

“......” You faltered, crossing your arms. “Touche. But this time, I really know what I’m doing.” With the utmost confidence and summoned strength you tilted Felix’s chair back, causing him to panic. “C’mon. Help me get this up through the attic.”

-〤〤〤-

Glitter glue. Hair dye. A bucket.

Truth be told, you actually did manage to go back and secure Felix’s belongings. It was around some point during the creation of the gigantic net at Hobby Lobby: F/n had seen them while running around, snagged it, and stashed the goods in the car without telling you. 

Now, you were going to use them against the enemy. If only you knew what the wrench from Home Depot was for… “Okay, listen up,” you stated, standing proudly on your roof. F/n stood at your side, Felix in between you two, still strapped to the dining room chair. Though the Kleenex were now gone, his pie hole remained shut...with Puffs. Not the good brand, F/n had said. “We have your friend, and as you can clearly see, he’s fine. We haven’t done anything to him.”

“Yet,” Hyunjin sneered, standing atop Han’s roof. He crossed his arms at Han’s right, Fox-face (Jeongin) on the left. “I fail to see how tying him up and stuffing his mouth shut equates to not doing anything.”

“Hyunjin, enough big words,” Han moaned. “We get it, you’re good at Scrabble, and you should have won. Lay off already.”

Hyunjin growled, making a face. From the opposing roof, you lowered your mic, extending your hand left. F/n glanced sideways, placing the box of hair dye in your hand. The situation on the other side swiftly grew stiff, everyone’s eyes watching you expectantly.

“Y-Y/n...what are you doing?”

It came out as more of a statement than a question. A fretful smirk played on the corner of your lips. “Oh my, what am I doing? …”

Yours fingers got right to work tearing open the packaging. Felix turned his head as far as his binding would let him, his eyes widening and brows sinking beneath his coral-colored bangs the moment he recognized the object...and the word permanent etched within a warning sign. “Mmm! Mm-mm mmm! MMM!”

“Wait, Y/n,” F/n said, reaching out. They suddenly looked hesitant, unsure. “We never questioned him first. Shouldn’t we…”

You paused, tossing the box and plastic wrap over your shoulder. With any luck, it’d blow into Han Jisung’s yard; if not, you could just pick it up later. “What, now you’re getting cold feet?” You huffed. “You’re the one that was getting carried away before. I thought you were sick of all this crap.”

“I am...I am. I’m just saying, maybe we should have pressed him for answers before running up here.”

“After they started egging our house?! What, was I supposed to wait for toilet paper to fly through the trees and spray paint to stain our front door?!”

“No, I’m just saying—”

“I’m done talking!” Your eyes narrowed, focusing on Han’s. He was staring right back at you, an intense look residing. “I want revenge. I want action. This ends today.”

You popped the cap off the bottle of murky green liquid, Hyunjin and Jeongin both seeming to lose their posture as the cap flipped through the air, bouncing to the ground below. They started to squirm, much to your delight; though perhaps a little overdramatic; but it was about time the other side felt the same pain and turmoil you had. It’d been far too long an unjust imbalance.

But Han held his hands at peace, calming his soldiers and taking a step forward; sending the imbalance back where it was, in his favor. He cupped his hands around that loud mouth of his. “Y/n!!! Listen to me, you don’t wanna do this! ...I-I don’t think, anyway!”

He seemed nervous. Flustered. You actually had Han Jisung, Hellion of 117 Maple Street, in a nervous fluster. 

The moment was sweet, rich, decadent and savory. In the air, a cool breeze blew by. 

“I’m sorry? What was that?” You lifted the bottle over Felix’s head. His whole body tensed, slightly leaning away like a magnet that didn’t attract. 

Han bit his lip, gaze flitting between your hand and the boy below. Behind him, Hyunjin and Jeongin watched with battered breath, biting their nails and covering the lower half of their faces. Han sighed, suddenly waving his hand behind him. “Jeongin, you shouldn’t see this. Cover your eyes. I don’t know if I can stop her.”

The boy frowned, shakily turning from Han’s voice back to you. “I-I can’t, Han...it’s too horrible, but I can’t look away.”

“Then get back inside. I’m sure Y/n will at least allow that much.”

Raising his brow at you in question, you carefully gave a single nod, watching the young fox-face go. Jeongin had never done anything to you, except for maybe participate in the egg-throwing debacle eight minutes ago. Otherwise, as far as you could tell, he was clean, just a bystander in Han’s antics.

As the roof door shut above Jeongin’s head, F/n gave you a worried look. “Y/n…” s/he said, turning to you sideways. “...Something’s not—”

“Shhh!” You spat. Your hand holding the bottle teetered towards a horizontal slant. “Not now. This makes things easier. One less groupie to worry about.”

“But Y/n—”

Felix could practically sense your movements, starting to squeal. “HAN! Please! I have an interview tomorrow and I don’t think they allow unnatural hair!!!”

F/n grunted, crossing their arms at being ignored. You listed your head to match the angle of the bottle. Revenge was so sweet. “Well, Han?”

It felt like an eternity went by. Everything was still, calm, the only noise to be heard the rustling of the trees. A distant clicking that was probably just the other neighbor’s cat. You felt like you were in a Shonen anime, where the characters face off for episodes at a time with nothing but empty heated stares and uselessly repeated banter (usually flashbacks).

“......” Han Jisung swallowed. “Okay, Y/n, stop.” He sighed. “...You win.”

A heaviness released from your chest. You...won? That was it? Was he really just surrendering right now? No surprise counterattack? No negotiations?

Instead, Han Jisung and his last remaining sidekick glared pitifully in your direction, like all hope had fleeted from their grasp. Meaning… 

You won. You actually won... 

The biggest smile took over the lower half of your face, so happy you could have cheered, overjoyedly so, kissing your friend’s cheek. You squealed in delight, tossing the bottle in the air and not really caring where it landed, so excited, so stoked, so—

“Ow!” a young man’s voice said.

Gasp. What was that?! That didn’t sound like Felix or...your friend...that was...wasn’t...

“Y/n!!!”

You whirled around, just in time to see Jeongin standing at the height of your roof, stuffing your friend down the ladder. He paused, similar to how Felix had in Hobby Lobby; that deer in the headlights look; and with terrified effort kicked F/n down the attic, hopping in and letting the door drop after him. 

Laughter could be heard bellowing along the wind, a hurricane billowing your direction. You whirled around, flabbergasted, horrified to see Han Jisung with that coy smirk on his face, that evil glint in his eye, the long-legged Hyunjin doing a memey sort of dance, as the two of them laughing it up at your expense. Even Felix, still bound to the chair, was…

...Well, actually, he looked rather annoyed and a little pissed. “HEY!” he griped, stamping his feet. “What happened to releasing me first?! I thought that was part of the plan!”

Plan…? …… 

“You mean…” You glared expressionless. “This was all setup...from the beginning? Even Hobby Lobby?”

“Duh,” Hyunjin piped, giving you an incredulous look. “We saw you and F/n heading that way, so I called Felix while Han coached Jeongin on the art of...sneaking onto other's property. We knew the two of you were probably at your breaking point, given how you were screaming all the way down the street…” He shrugged. “We figured you’d try to retaliate. It was too good to pass up.”

“......”

Anger wasn’t enough anymore. You were downright enraged, seething...and also, a bit heartbroken. A lot heartbroken. It was all planned. Your revenge was just another part of their game. They anticipated it, adjusted to it, even arranged it. It was all for not...and, what’s more…

Now they had F/n. The Fox-faced demon would be scampering out of your house and into the devil’s layer at any minute.

But he’d made a fatal mistake. You still had one of their own in your grasp.

With the utmost vexation and irritability you screamed, grabbing the bottle of hair dye from where it got caught between two shilling panels and tore the whole lid off, dumping the entire bottle into Felix’s hair. Han and Hyunjin froze in the middle of their victorious dance ritual to watch in horror as Felix screeched, trying to shake the substance out and make any feeble attempt he could to get away. You ripped open the glitter glue next, aiming it right at his scalp.

“Give F/n back right now or I’m adding glitter. Lots of it.”

“......”

Han Jisung and Hwang Hyunjin just continued to stare at you dumbfounded. Because they didn’t respond, you emptied the entire container, not caring if it seeped into the boy’s eyes as you dropped everything else for the attic door. 

“OH SH*T! MY EYES! MY FACE! YOU GUYS SUCK! AHH—”

The roof latch clicked behind you.

Flying down the ladder and around the hall you ran with all your might for the front door. Surprisingly enough, however, Jeongin was having a tough time getting there himself, wrestling with F/n for a position that allowed him to keep them quiet while having the freedom to move quickly. Unfortunately for him, F/n wasn’t going down without a fight.

“Let...go…! Get…off…...ahh! Y/n!!!”

They were wrestling at the end of the hall, just above the stairs. You pushed yourself harder, faster, ready to pulverize this kid you once found cute and adorable.

Something was off, though. You noticed as you got closer. The way they fought— it was almost too carefully, like they were trying to avoid hitting something.

You found out too little too late. F/n’s eyes widened. 

“Y/n, no, look out—!”

Fwoosh!

Your foot tripped over a wire, and the three of you went tumbling upwards.

You couldn’t believe you fell for the same trick twice.

-〤〤〤-

“Hold still,” Hyunjin groaned, clawing at Felix’s bindings. The boy practically refused, squirming with all his might.

“I’m holding still! I can’t see!”

“What does that have to do with being still?!”

Felix fumed.

Han Jisung made his way to the top of the ladder, rolling onto his back to catch his breath. It wasn’t like he wanted to drive Y/n to do this. Rather, he was just having a little fun, passing time, and essentially, getting to know her. 

She was the girl he thought about spending quite a bit of his life with, after all.

He turned his head sideways, taking in the view of the mountains, the small forestry area, the big city on the other side. Dang it, he knew Y/n’s roof had a better view of the area. “Both of you...quit whining...for a sec…”

He fought to catch his breath. Normally he thought himself to be in pretty good shape, but maybe eating a whole cheesecake and slacking off last week for that Netflix marathon put him back a few steps. Diagonally above him, Hyunjin sighed, removing the last of Felix’s restraints. “Okay, there. You’re free now.”

Felix stood, immediately rubbing his shirt over his face and stretching his arms out wide, then his legs. He looked around. 

“Something wrong?” Hyun asked. Felix began to sweat, visible from a mile away.

“Oh, gosh, you guys. I still can’t see. I think I��m legally blonde.”

“......” Hyunjin blinked. “You mean legally blind? Legally Blonde is a movie.” He glanced up at his sparkling dishwater-green hair. “Also, your hair’s green now. An ugly green. And shiny. Too shiny—”

“Both of you shhh,” Han griped, sitting up sideways. He pushed himself up all the way, stumbling diagonally as he hiked up toward the other side of the roof. “Has Jeongin come out yet? Where’s Y/n?”

“I don’t know,” Felix spoke, swatting at his surroundings. “I can’t see anything.”

“He obviously wasn’t talking to you,” Hyunjin piped. He leaned over the edge, examining the front porch, then the lawn. “...I don’t know either. I didn’t hear the front door but, then again, I couldn’t hear anything with Whines-A-Lot back here blubbering so loud.”

“Why are you in such a bad mood today? Normally you’re really sweet and chill. And why is everyone attacking me all of a sudden?! I’m the one that agreed to be the bait of this operation! Me!”

“Okay, okay,” Han waved his hands. He really hated being the responsible one, but with these two at each other's throats and Jeongin nowhere to be found, he really had no other choice. “Felix, go inside and see if you can find Jeongin. Or Y/n. Anyone.”

Felix scoffed, throwing his hands in the air like a tossed salad. “Oh, yeah. Send the blind guy in. That plan always works. Makes total sense!”

“Oh, right...uhh, Hyunjin?”

Hyunjin scrunched up his face. “No way. I’m not going in there. Breaking and entering is not going on my personal record. Pranks are fine, but I’m not violating the law. That’s your department, Mr. Fifteen-Unpaid-Speeding-Tickets.”

“......” Groaning, Han made his way to the top of the roof, kneeling just short of the peak to pull the lever. However, the door wouldn’t budge. “...It’s locked.”

“Locked?”

“Yeah, that’s what I said. Locked.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Shoot, why would she stop to lock the door? Now wh—”

“HAN JISUNG!!!”

All three college boys froze. Crouching, they whipped their heads around wildly. Even Felix. “What was that?!” He asked. “Was that Y/n?!”

“HAN!!!” Another called. Smaller, lighter, yet contradictingly more masculine. Hyunjin gasped. 

“That sounded like Jeongin!”

Then, suddenly, all three missing voices meshed together, the chorus dark and booming: “LET US OUT! LET US OUT LET US OUT LET US OUT!!!”

Hyunjin jumped to his feet, kicking and pounding at the door. “Quick, open the door! We have to rescue Jeongin!”

Han’s jaw fell a little. “What about Y/n?”

“What about her?!” He grunted, hitting the door harder. “Jeongin is our first priority!”

“I thought you didn’t like breaking and entering,” Felix sneered from the back, still waving at the air like a recently-blind person would. His elder tsked, scowling.

“It’s not breaking and entering if someone’s life is in danger! Han, what the hell kind of trap did you put in there?!”

Han blinked, trying to process. Everything had gone South so quickly, curved in a direction he wasn’t expecting— he couldn’t think. His mind drew up blanks. Never in his thirteen years of pranking history had he ever not been in control of his own crafty work. 

Now his work was playing a joke on him. “Han! Hello?! Earth to Jisung?”

“...I…”

“What did you do in there?!”

“......” He swallowed, barely regaining his composure. “I set up another net. Just a quick one, like the one from earlier today.”

“What?!” Hyunjin roared. “But that took me all morning! How did you do it in five minutes?!”

“I didn’t,” he replied. “I did it in four.”

Hyunjin deadpanned, smacking a hand over his face. “‘Kay…how did you manage to pull that off?”

His superior in the art of mischief fell back on his behind, staring out seamlessly at nothing in particular. Obnoxiously calm for the circumstances. “I’ve been sneaking into her house every now and then when she left the back door open. I’d set up a small part here, or a spring wire there, just small stuff out of the way that no one’d notice. They’ve hardly been home with midterms going around.”

“......” Hyunjin shook his head in disbelief. “Han, there’s no way they wouldn’t notice or not accidentally set something like that off until now.”

Han turned back to him in earnest. “I just set the final wire down this afternoon. The activation one. One of them— probably Y/n— tripped over it.”

“...If that’s true, then…”

Another sonorous from down below reached the canopies above: “LET US OUT!!!”

Hyunjin dropped back on all fours. “LET US IN!!!” he cried, pounding on the hardwood door. “Jeongin, buddy, it’s going to be oka—”

“Come on!” Han said, leaping to his feet. He grabbed Felix by the wrist, tugging the two along behind him before making a crash landing for the bushes. No time to waste now. He needed to get his act together, take a leap of faith that, maybe, if he played his cards right, Y/n could see him in a whole new light.

It would be a long shot. If he remembered to jump from the right spot, anyway. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!” Both boys screamed, clinging to each other’s sides. They hit the shrubs, bouncing forward and rolling into Y/n’s front yard.

“...Was that a trampoline???” Felix asked. Han scoffed, shoving the two off of him.

“I planted an emergency escape device in her bushes last week, just in case.” He dusted himself off, screwing his head on straight while jogging to the front porch. “What do I look like, stupid or something?” 

“......” Hyunjin watched him cross to the front door, lying upside down. “Do you want us to answer that?”

“...No.” 

Han rang the doorbell. Stamped his foot. Remembered all house guests and tenants were currently tied up at the moment, slapped himself, panicked. He banged his fist against the door. 

“Y/n?! It’s okay! Daddy’s going to fix this!”

Hyunjin made a noise (he was full of noises), tromping up the steps while Felix rolled himself around in the yard, trying to figure out which way was up and what he should do with himself. “Did you just call yourself—”

“Yes, now shut up.” Han dug around in his pocket, pulling out a key. “Heh heh heh…” 

He jimmied the lock, twisting and turning the key this way and that. But the door wouldn’t budge, not even an inch.

“Sh*t!” He grabbed his hair. “Why isn’t this working?! I made copies of her keys three weeks ago!”

Hyunjin glared sideways. “You changed out her locks two weeks ago.” 

Shoot, that was right. Han kicked the door, fuming. “Dang it! ...Ow!” 

He was spent. Gone. Energy depleting. And now, his foot hurt. Spinning around he banged his head against the door, sliding down to sulk on his backside. 

He hadn’t meant for things to go awry. He’d just wanted to mess with Y/n, see what made her tick, have some fun. Find out what she liked, what she didn’t like, maybe get up the nerve to ask her what she was doing for dinner next Saturday so he could mess with the food at her favorite restaurant and force her to come to a candle-lit dinner in his backyard instead, where he’d have her second-favorite takeout waiting on plates of gold he’d “borrowed” from Hyunjin’s aunt.

If only things would have worked out that way. “LET US OUT LET US OUT LET US OUT!!!” the house called.

Hyun and Han shared a pitiful look, plastering themselves to the walls and door. They had no choice. There was nothing left. “LET US IN LET US IN LET US IN!!!”

“HAN JISU— …” 

Quiet. That was strange. What was it quiet?! What happened?! What could have—

...Oh no. What if…!

“DON’T HURT JEONGIN!” Han screamed, pressing his nose to the glass. “PLEASE! Y/N F/N PLEASE HYUNJIN WILL KILL ME IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO HIM!!!”

“WHAT?!” Hyunjin yelled, pressing against the glass as well. “Move over, I can’t see! WHAT ARE YOU FIENDISH PEOPLE DOING TO HIM?!”

There was no response. Han began sweating profusely, feeling his heart ready to burst in a bad way. This was it. It was over. He’d have to call the cops to have them released, and then Han would probably go to jail for twenty-seven misdemeanors and a couple felony charges. Not to mention those unpaid speeding tickets.

Chink. Clunk. Creek.

A force against him gave way, the front door magically opening. As Han and Hyunjin fell forward, a blind, sparkling, green-haired man smiled down at them, standing at the other side.

-〤〤〤-

The clamouring coming from your front door set you on edge, wiggling and slashing at the ties that bound you. And F/n. And Jeongin.

The three of you piled on top of each other in an awkward heap, you being fortunate enough to have flipped on top. “Ow! Y/n, get your foot out of my eye!” F/n cried.

Apologetically, you shifted your weight, trying to give them room in the small net. Jeongin huffed as you did, making the most cumberous and uncomfortable face as you shifted your bottom over his backside, close to his head. “This is your fault for sneaking in here and trying to kidnap F/n,” you scolded, only feeling a little sorry given the circumstances.

He blushed, perplexingly so, carefully trying to claw his way to a corner that didn’t exist. “I, um...I’m sorry…”

Like that was enough to get the three of you out of this arrangement. Rolling your eyes, you focused your attention on the front door you could just barely see, tuning your ears to adjust and pick up on anything.

“What are they saying?” F/n asked. You shrugged, huffing and puffing disorderly.

“I don’t know. I can barely hear anything. They’re whispering. They keep looking over here, though.”

“Who opened the door?! How did they get in here???”

F/n was currently squished with their head facing the opposite direction, explaining their heighted insecurity and naggingness. You sighed, squinting and rocking your weight in order to make the small flexible cage sway to better see around the corner. “I think...Felix let them in. He must have used the back door or something.”

“Son of a b*tch, Y/n!!!” F/n quietly fumed. “This is why I always tell you to make sure both doors are locked! You never think to check the back door and it drives me crazy!!!”

“I know, I know okay?! Calm down! You’re gonna draw attention!”

“HAN!!!” Jeongin suddenly screamed. “FELIX! GET ME OUT OF THIS THING!!!”

Both you and F/n panicked. “SHHHHHHHH!!!”

He regarded the two of you like you were crazy. “Just five minutes ago you were screaming too!”

F/n hissed. “Yeah, well that was five minutes ago, and this is now!”

Jeongin sighed. “Listen, this is really uncomfortable for me, especially because you’re sitting...entirely too close to me,” he spoke, “so how about I make a deal with you two?”

“No way. I don’t make deals with demons. Or vipers, or monsters, or Fox-faced devils that sneak into our house and try to kidnap me!!!”

Jeongin sighed again, letting out a slight hiss of annoyance at the end. At the base of the stairs, Han and Hyunjin started making their ascent, Felix stumbling around a bit with a bandana now over his eyes before following after them.

“Oh shoot,” you whispered. “Here they come.”

Making his way around the net once, Han paused right square before you; and there it was, that evil flirtatious wink, tongue sweeping over his lips scarcely so. “S’up, gorgeous?”

Shoot me. I want to die.

Han poked your nose, making a little annoying sound effect and laughing when you teetered backwards, swatting away at the germs he left on your face. “Aww, I think someone doesn’t like their situation very much.”

“Lay off. Get us out of this stupid thing and then get the hell out. If you don’t, I’m calling the cops.”

Han chuckled and slapped his leg like you were just the cutest little thing to him. “Oh, alright, calm down princess. You’re just sour over falling for the same trick twice.”

It burned you how much truth there was to those words. You would have spit at him if F/n wasn’t at risk of being in the line of fire. “Just shut up and get us out of here. Take your friend with you.”

Tangled up behind you, Jeongin sputtered; you could feel him roll his eyes. “Gladly,” he muttered.

After admiring your pissed-off look for a few seconds, and Han taking a few selfies for his own selfish gain, Han and Hyunjin got right to work, snipping wires here, tugging at rope there. Eventually, after a few moments of unblissful trepidation and embarrassment, the net lowered gently, falling lifelessly about a foot above ground. 

The three of you groaned, F/n having the wind knocked out of them for a second. Scampering and shoving off of each other, you turned away the moment you found your legs, brushing yourself off and walking down the hall a few paces. Your feet prickled with numbness, then faded and blood rushed through. 

When you turned around to check on F/n and kick everyone else out, Han Jisung had already found his way to your face. “Hey there, gorgeous. All better?”

You scowled most irately, placing your hands on his chest to push him off and startling yourself when he wouldn’t budge, and your hands just...stayed there. “Get out of here. You got us out, now you’re no longer welcome.”

“Oh, was that all you needed from me?” He smiled. Almost tenderly. Or maybe it was, you didn’t know. “I’m hurt, Y/n. I thought maybe we could...talk more. Get to know one another.”

“What?!” You tried to see around him, but he mirrored your every step and movement. When you pulled your hands away, he latched onto your wrists, placing them back. His fingers smoothed over the backs of your hands, intertwining with yours. You gulped, a feeling in your gut exploding.

“This is nice,” he said softly, giving your hands a gentle squeeze. “Isn’t it?”

It most certainly was not nice. Not nice at all! ...Yet, you were having quite a bit of trouble telling him that. His hands were so soft and...rigid...even the small calluses that sprouted along his palms and outline were somehow oddly alluring, inviting you to stay. 

You shivered, bristling all over. No, no. Get ahold of yourself Y/n. This can’t happen. I can’t go down like this. 

Shaking your head you shoved yourself back instead, running two steps to the right...and slamming gently into the adjacent wall. Gently. Softly. Softly slamming.

What the hell, why was everything with Han Jisung so soft all of a sudden?! You bore your eyes up at him, seeing as he was now just...inches away from you...again...g-getting closer…

His nose brushed right up against yours. A breath caught in your throat, begging to scream. Everything else in your body was. He had slithered himself to press up against you.

You’re pretty sure, even if you couldn’t feel it, your face was the darkest shade of red right now. Han undoubtedly noticed too, simpering just a fraction from your lips. “What should we do now, princess? Should we…” He inched your waist forward. “...go next door?”

Next door. Next door, where the hellhole of disasters had started. 

...Something about that line just didn’t sit right with you. Feeling as if the whole moment had been ruined (and good gravy you had to get out of this), you shimmied yourself a bit of wiggle room and shot your knee skyward, wincing as a howl of pain rang out in your ear. You kicked Han back, making a run for F/n…

...Who was again, gone. Everyone was gone.

Turning around, Han gave you a childish salute, that flirtatious wink following him all the way out the front door. You couldn’t do anything. Just observe him leave in shock.

Until you heard a thump from downstairs, and raced to find Felix feeling his way around the kitchen. 

“Now, I know there’s a backdoor somewhere...it was in here when I came in…”

You bore your eyes into him. Smirked.

Five minutes later, his whines echoed all through the house and down the porch steps.

-〤〤〤-

It may not have been high noon, but that didn’t stop Hyunjin and Fox-face Jeongin from turning on an old western showdown score. 

You stood on your side of the property line, Felix rebound though now standing at your side. If he was miffed about his hair and the overzealous glitter drawing attention to it, he didn’t say anything. Possibly because being temporarily blind was pulling all his attention away.

On the other side, about ten or twelve meters from the line, stood Han Jisung, in all his hellion, dark-profiled glory. F/n was bound and gagged beside him, looking like a tick about to pop. You’d never seen that vein before, throbbing above their forehead. Hyunjin and Jeongin observed from afar, amongst the safety of shade and porch railing.

You lifted the megaphone you’d brought back with you from the roof. “On the count of three,” you instructed, gripping Felix’s sleeve tight. 

Han Jisung cackled, or his eyes did anyway, a sparkle of humor at play. “Alright. Hostage exchange on three.”

“Okay…”

You both paced exactly twenty-something steps until you were only two feet from the line.

“One…”

“Two…”

“...Thre—”

“Wait.”

Your mind did a little flip, attention spiraling upward. “What?”

The hellion next door smirked. “I have one condition.”

“Oh?” You sputtered. “So do I.”

“Ladies first.”

You deadpanned. “Stop intervening and disturbing my life and F/n’s sanity and I won’t call the cops.”

He laughed, a very hearty, joyful sound. It sort of...made your heart spin. “That’s fair. I can agree to those terms...if you agree to mine.” You scoffed.

“And what would that be?”

Han Jisung smiled. Brighter than the sun. For once, it was almost as if he was revealing a side of his persona to you he’d kept locked away all this time; he suddenly appeared to be genuine, sincere, and oh-so benevolent. Not to mention handsome. “Go on a date with me. Saturday, at five.”

“What?!”

The world came to a crash. Everything just seemed to stop, the birds even dropping like flies to gawk at the enigma that was Han Jisung. Behind him and to the left, Jeongin and Hyunjin stared at each other in bewilderment. Felix muttered some kind of disbelief beneath his breath. F/n looked like s/he really would pop.

“Mmm?!” They shrieked. Han chuckled, ruffling his hair away from his face and casting squinted eyes out over the neighborhood. 

“Yeah, uh...I’ll pick you up at five, if you like. I mean, you have to, because this is a condition. My deal. Where we’re going is a surprise, but I can give you a hint.” He leaned forward, twitching his nose a bit. “There’s a lot of action going on in the color department, and it usually gives me an allergy attack. But, I figured you may enjoy watching my face fall apart.”

“.........”

Slowly, you adjusted your gaze over to F/n. They were shaking their head wildly, though limitedly, so as not to tip off anyone. 

“.........” You turned your face back to Han Jisung. “...Make it five-thirty. I have an errand to run that day.”

He bit his lower lip to keep from smiling too much. “Deal. Okay, on three. One…”

“Two…”

“Three.”

You each pushed your captives over at the same time, Felix and F/n stumbling forward over the property line. Hyunjin and Jeongin raced down into the lawn while you quickly got to work untying and freeing your housemate. 

S/he turned and looked to you with the utmost confusion and disappointment in their eyes. You smiled, sadly, and turning away watched as three of the four boys embraced and spat at each other, Hyunjin and Jeongin poking and teasing Felix about his hair, and Han Jisung watching you back with stars in his eyes. Once a hellion, it was as if a great fog had lifted over the valley, and now you could see he was both day and night. A myriad of sunlight, and a mischievous moon.

“You’re not really going on a date with him,” F/n scolded, walking in sync with you up the porch steps and in through the front door. You waited until they were safely inside and halfway to the kitchen for another drink, waving and even winking in Han Jisung’s direction. It caught him off guard, and you snickered at his confused stare. 

“We’ll see,” is all you said, shutting the door behind you.

-〤〤〤-

Saturday, 5:25 p.m.

Your house mysteriously felt like the Island of the Lost.

“F/n! Have you seen my hairbrush?!”

Running back and forth in front of the TV, up and down the stairs, rummaging through both bathrooms, F/n sighed, annoyed at having their early-evening talk show interrupted. They set the TV on mute. “What are you looking for? Your hairbrush?”

You nodded, heading back towards the upstairs bath. F/n jumped up from a commercial break, following you.

“How did you manage to lose your hairbrush? Sheesh, Y/n, you’ve been forgetful all day.”

You turned toward the mirror, staring worrisome eyes at the curlers in your hair, the sloppily-applied two minute makeup job on your face. F/n noticed as well, giving a small pout as s/he crossed their arms, leaning against the doorframe. “Where are you going, anyway?”

Uh-oh. “Hmm...?”

You pretended not to hear that. F/n blinked, their face falling to an unimpressed state. “I asked, where are you going?”

“......”

“......”

Downstairs, the doorbell rang. Crap. It wasn’t five-thirty yet!

F/n turned toward the sound, their brows lifting in minor surprise. “Who could that be? Are you expecting a package or anything?”

They began wandering in the direction of the staircase, but you cringed, throwing yourself as a blockade. “Ahahahahahahaha! …” Sweat. “...I-I’ll get it. You should get back to your show!”

F/n gasped, pushing past you and gracefully making a sharp left just a few feet from the door. Phew. 

You peered around the corner, trying to make out the silhouette through the foggy glass. 

Tall-ish. A bit on the short side. Skinny? Seemingly masculine.

It had to be him. Panic struck you like a bat out of hell, scrambling to the bathroom and ripping the curlers out of your hair. You fought through three bottles of creams and mascara while juggling your toothbrush hanging out of your mouth, rinsing, spitting, and finally flipping your hair down, shaking it loose and flipping back over.

Oh yeah. Messy-chic look. Perfect. With a touch of gloss (or lipstick) you smoothed out your casual-dressy outfit before skipping downstairs and slipping on your favorite dress shoes at the door, purse slung over your bodice.

This was it. You discreetly shifted your eyes to the left. F/n was still inthralld in their talk show. Now was your chance for a clean getaway without any awkward accusations or encounters.

Taking a deep, measured breath, you gingerly opened the door, blowing it out on the exhale. Han Jisung stood in all his new-lighted glory, his back turned to you as he examined the neighborhood, waiting.

You gave a small cough, stepping out and locking up behind you. Han turned around, his eyes widening when he saw you. “Whoa...uh…”

“Yes?” Your gaze traveled down to the flowers in his hand. “Are those for me, or an apology to F/n?”

You both laughed, Han thrusting them forward a bit forcefully. An awkward color painted a ring around his face, across his ears and along the curves of his cheeks. “Uh, b-both, I guess. ...But, mainly for you.”

He was nervous. For real this time. You smiled, taking the small bouquet and burying your face into the petals. You inhaled deeply. “...Mmm...they smell really nice!”

You beamed. For maybe five seconds. After that, a spout of water soaked your forehead.

Han Jisung pressed his lips together, trying his darndest not to laugh. His eyes avoided you entirely, observing everything but your face. A moment later, he bolted, signalling for his groupies to turn on the sprinklers. Coffee rained down on both of your lawns, dyeing both sides murky Vanilla Latte.

You chased him down the porch steps, through the caffeinated shower, laughing.

-〤〤〤-

“...And that about wraps up our show for today!”

F/n flipped the TV off, turning their gaze to the window. Is it raining already?

As they approached the window, their jaw fell. They opened the window. “Y/N!!! HAN JISUNG!!!”

...It was no use.

Pulling up a chair, they fell to their knees, observing the bizarre weather in a moment of acceptance. They extended their mug over the windowsill, sighing as the caffeinated shower refilled their morning latte.

ღ Stray Kids M.List | M.List ღ

[yoontopia]

𝟯𝟮. “𝗜𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸𝘀 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗼𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂” | 𝗷𝗷𝗸

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader; genre: fluff, sort of idol!verse;  words: 2.8k

warnings: none ; rating: G

Part of the ‘100 Ways to say I Love you’ drabbles

author’s note: had to throw the long hair and tattoos in there, i couldn’t stop myself

You lay in bed staring blankly up at the ceiling, head void of thoughts. You could smell the barbecued meat despite your closed bedroom door, the deliciousness wafting in and making your stomach grumble. You know you need to get dressed and head downstairs soon, but the exhaustion from the past week is settling in and you cannot bear to move.

You hear your mother calling for you and you shout back in response that yes! you’re coming, for the guests will start arriving soon. Being back home after almost five years of being away at university halfway across the world had your parents throwing a very informal barbecue for the neighbours living on your street. It had been about a week since your return and your parents had been so excited that they had been treating you like a prized possession. You wondered how long this treatment would last, before your mom would start shouting at you to carry out your shares of household chores.

Sitting up in your bed, you looked around your bedroom. You had grown up here, spent your childhood and teen years here, but had moved away at the ripe age of eighteen, and never looked back. Your room, therefore, had remained immortalized, peeling posters of whatever rock bands you’d been obsessed with stuck on the wall. A small desk stood under the window, stacked with your old textbooks, the wall next to it covered with taped photographs of you, your family, and your childhood friends.

Smiling slightly to yourself you got out of the bed and made your way to the photo wall, looking at each picture carefully. Most of the photos were of you and your best friend Jooyoung, who had moved away for university herself. While the two of you had headed your separate ways after high school, you’d kept in touch, often video calling each other and giving out life updates. Jooyoung, in your opinion, was your soulmate, someone who’d been there for you since day one, who knew you inside and out. You missed her terribly and were almost sad that she wouldn’t be here today. Unlike you, however, Jooyoung visited home often, attending university a mere three-hour drive away.

Your eyes travelled to the other photos, some of you with your parents, of your old cat whom you terribly missed, until your eyes landed on one particular picture, which had been crinkled with time. It was a photo of you and Jooyoung at a lemonade stand out on your driveway, accompanied by a skinny boy with a mop of dark hair falling over his forehead. You frowned slightly staring at the boy’s face, memories flooding in. That’s right, Jooyoung and you were part of an inseparable trio during your school years, the third leg of which was made up by one Jeon Jungkook. Nerdy and geeky and video-game obsessed, Jungkook had lived across the street from you and you and he had spent many years being attached at the hip. This was, however, one of the only photos you had left of him.

At the ripe young age of fifteen, Jungkook had moved to Seoul on his own, having been scouted by some entertainment company. You remembered laughing at him with Jooyoung when he’d told you what had happened and had warned him that he was about to get scammed. But it hadn’t been a scam, and Jungkook had moved to Seoul and you’d never heard from him again. His emails had dwindled after a while, and once you’d moved away and gotten busy with your own life, you’d forgotten all about him. Your mother would occasionally give you updates over phone calls that he’d been training to be put into a group, that he’d debuted, that his group had gathered decent popularity in the country. Your mother had spoken with quiet pride, talking about Jungkook as though he was her own son. It made sense, you supposed, he’d been quite close with your parents, just like you’d been close with his.

You’d left Korea around the time he’d debuted and had never bothered to check his group out, partly due to not wanting unwanted memories to return. Jungkook had all but cut you and Jooyoung from his life and you needed no reminders of that fact. Their international popularity wasn’t very high, but if your mother was right, everybody in Korea with a working internet connection knew who they were. You supposed it was a flex, being a childhood friend to someone sort-of famous, but you doubted famous idol Jeon Jungkook even remembered you. You wondered if you’d even recognize him now, some seven years later. He was probably rich, and you were a struggling unemployed graduate moving back home to start your job search. Two completely different worlds. However, in your small, sleepy town full of fishermen and farmers, even famous Jeon Jungkook would have a hard time being recognized. This place was literally filled to the brim with the elderly.

Your mom calls for you again and you yell back that you’re coming. Walking over to your dresser you changed out of your sweatpants into jeans and a striped sweater. Shoving your feet into your bedroom slippers you took a deep breath before heading downstairs, pulling your bedroom door shut behind you.

You padded downstairs and joined your mother in the kitchen where she was busy setting plates.

“Need help?” you asked. Your mom smiled at you and handed you a bag of cutlery.

“Please put these out,” she said. “Forks in one cup knives in one cup.” You nodded and sat down on a stool near the kitchen island and began sorting the cutlery.

People were beginning to arrive, and you could hear them greeting your father who was busy cooking up a feast in the front yard barbecue.

“Where’s Seungwoon?” you asked, wondering where your little brother had gone off to. Your mother looked at the clock near the stove.

“I sent him to get some extra drinks. You kids will need drinks,” she let out a soft laugh. “I keep forgetting you kids are all basically adults now. I stocked juice yesterday, but I realized you’d probably need alcohol too, so I sent him to buy some.”

“You sent an eighteen-year-old kid on a booze run?” you snorted, and your mother laughed along.

“He was eager, so I put him up to it.” She said and you laughed. It felt nice, being back home, hearing your mother’s laugh in person.

“How many people did you invite anyway?” you asked, leaning to look outside. It was a bright sunny day, the sweltering August heat shining through the kitchen window.

“Not too many,” she said, putting some bread in the oven to warm. “The Sungs’ next door, Sooyeon and her husband are coming, although Jooyoung isn’t home, I’m afraid,” she looked over at you apologetically and you sighed. “She’s interning and working through the summer and couldn’t get the weekend off. They work her to the bone, but she really sticks to it. Let’s see… a couple more families that you probably don’t know, they’re new on the street, moved in three or so years ago. They don’t have any kids.”

“So there is nobody my age!” you said in surprise. “Seungwoon didn’t need to go get alcohol just for me and him mom, I can drink the juice.” Your mom laughed at your outburst and looked at you, hands on her hips.

“They Jeons’ are coming, and they have two fully grown kids who will need to be fed and watered,” You stopped sorting forks and looked up in mild shock. Your mom smiled knowingly. “Junghyun’s back for the weekend and I believe so is Jungkook,” she sighed as she said that. “Boy he must be a true Seoul child now – I wonder if our cheap countryside liquor and food is up to his current tastes, I haven’t seen him for years, unless its on TV of course.”

“So, you just want everything perfect because we’re having a minor celebrity over?” you asked glumly.

“Can you blame me?” she exclaimed. “You’ll see what I mean when they come, he’s different. People from Seoul are just different. I bet he drinks some fancy overseas brand of beer.”

“He’s not from Seoul,” you snapped. “He’s from here and if he looks down his fat nose at our country bumpkin ways, I’ll sit on him like I used to.”

“I’d like to see you try,” your mother grinned. “He’s had his growth spurts while yours seem to have forgotten you.”

“I’m short because grandma is short!” You exclaimed, but only half annoyed. Your mother laughed again and changed topics. The rest of the time was spent in you setting out plates in a pile and mixing the dressing into the salad and bringing out the napkins for people to grab. Your brother returned shortly after, and you helped him unload the soju and beer into the fridge. Then you resumed your seat at the kitchen island, scrolling through your phone while your mother had you taste everything to make sure it was edible.

“Stop fussing mom,” you said, at last. “Everything tastes good, and dad’s barbecue ribs are always a hit.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just excited you’re back,” she sighed. “It’s nice to have some help in the kitchen like this, just us girls.” The two of you shared a smile. Just then, the doorbell rang. Your brother opened the door. You turned to see who it was, and a smile split on your face.

Jungkook’s mother came in first, holding a bottle of wine that she put down next to you. She gave you a big smile and you let out a little squeal and jumped up to give her a hug.

“Oh my! You have grown so much!” she said laughing, pulling you in for another hug. The two of you were so busy catching up that you almost didn’t notice a tall figure entering after his mother. When you looked up, you finally saw him, and you had to exercise great control to stop your jaw from hitting the floor.

Because right there, talking quietly in the entrance to your house to your little brother, was Jeon Jungkook. You wouldn’t have recognized him off the street. He was tall, broad, wearing a well fitted black sweatshirt and black jeans that were ripped at the knees. A pair of expensive sunglasses were tucked into the front of his sweater. His hair was long, falling into his eyes, and curling around his ears, which had been pierced in multiple places. The silver of his hooped earrings shown every time he moved his head. You blinked – was that a tattoo peaking up from his sweater and curling around his neck?

Forcing yourself to turn your attention back to Mrs. Jeon, you laughed awkwardly at whatever she had been saying, only hearing half of it. Suddenly feeling small and awkward, you turned back to your phone and buried yourself in it. Jeon Jungkook had gone out and come back looking like a walking magazine cover and you still looked like you did at fifteen, only now with two degrees to your name. You tried to tune everything out as you scrolled twitter, hoping that you’d suddenly become invisible to everyone around you.

“Guk!” his mother called affectionately, and you bit your tongue trying not to curse out loud. “Look who’s here!” You heard him walk over, could smell the faint cologne as he approached his mother.

A soft voice said your name in mild surprise, and your chest constricted because you hardly recognized his voice either, which had deepened in the last seven years. You locked your phone hesitantly and turned in his direction, trying to meet his eyes.

Round brown eyes blinked back at you, containing the surprise that his voice also held. You gave him a small smile in greeting.

“Hey Jungkook, how’ve you been?” you asked, hating how meek your voice sounded.

“Kids, go upstairs,” your mom said from her spot at the stove, not bothering to even look up. You suspected she felt as small in Jungkook’s presence as you did. You sighed and got off your seat slowly and beckoned for Jungkook to follow you. He did.

Once in your room, you sat down on your bed and Jungkook awkwardly took a seat at your desk chair.

“So,” you started, letting the word drag out. “A singer, huh?”

The tips of his ears went red, to your surprise. You’d expected confidence, even cockiness. He rubbed the back of his neck almost shyly.

“You know?” he asked. You shrugged.

“My mom’s a fan,” you said truthfully, snorting. “I’ll be honest though; I’ve never checked out your music.”

“Ouch,” he said, and to your surprise, a look of genuine hurt crossed his face. But you blinked and it was gone. “How are you?”

“M’fine,” you said slowly. “It’s weird being back, but I’m getting used to it. I’m done university and now I gotta job hunt y’know.”

“Right,” he said, sounding impressed, and you didn’t know why. “What was your degree in?”

“Dual major in biochemistry and pharmaceuticals,” you said. His mouth opened and he looked genuinely stupefied.

“Woah that’s like, cool,” He said, and you let out a small laugh because he sounded genuine. “So, you’re like an academic.”

“Kinda?” you said. “It doesn’t feel any different though. I’m unemployed for now.”

“I always pictured you doing well at school and stuff,” he said, still sounding awed. “It’s a good look.”

“A good look?”

“Dunno, science? It’s a good look, it suits you. It looks good on you.” You blinked. Nobody had put it that way before.

“What? That’s such a weird thing to say,” you said huffing out a laugh. The tips of Jungkook’s ears went even redder.

“I’m just saying I always pictured you being successful,” he said softly. You frowned.

“Are you serious right now?” you asked. He looked at you, head tilting in a heartbreakingly familiar way. “Who’s the more successful person in this room right now? Aren’t you like, a millionaire?”

“I only finished high school!” he told you and you gaped at him. “I never got to go to university, so I think it’s cool that you got out of here and did all that all on your own.” His sentence ended in a mumble. The two of you sat there in silence after that.

“Was it hard?” you asked after a while. He looked up at you in question. “Was it hard giving it all up?”

“Yeah… I guess,” he said. “But what part of life isn’t hard?”

“Was it worth it?”

“Yeah,” he said and this time there was no hesitation, which had you smiling. “I did miss all my friends though.”

“Like me,” you joked

“Like you.” He said simply, and the smile slipped from your face.

“You stopped keeping in touch,” you whispered.

“Keeping in touch made me sad,” he said quietly. “I was homesick a lot back then, and all I wanted to do was run away and be able to go to school with everyone again. Your emails and updates made me sad and homesick.”

“I’m sorry that’s not what I—” you started but he cut you off with a knowing smile.

“I know, but to a fifteen-year-old it felt like the end of the world.” You stared at him.

“Yes, but now you’re like… you,” you said at last, finally letting yourself sound impressed. “Don’t you have a gaggle of fangirls throwing themselves at you? I swear that’s what happens to good looking famous boys.”

“You think I’m good looking?” he asked, his bashful expression disappearing replaced by a small smirk. You swallowed but decided to play nonchalant.

“Have you looked at you?” you gestured at him and his smirk widened.

“You’re still so cute,” he said simply. Your cheeks suddenly felt a tad too warm. You were about to ask him what he meant by ‘still’ when you heard your mom calling you both down for drinks. You stood up.

“C’mon,” you said and walked to the door. When you looked back you saw Jungkook still stood near your desk, staring at the photos taped to the wall, a small smile playing on his face, his hand on a certain crinkled picture. “Guk.” The nickname slipped out accidentally.

He looked over at you, and you tried not to blush under his gaze. You still couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that this man was the same boy who beat your brother at every video game and who you used to sit on when he annoyed you and who you and Jooyoung had bribed into putting on a full face of his mother’s makeup at thirteen. But as he approached you, you couldn’t help but feeling that maybe he hadn’t changed all that much after all.

“Let’s go I’m hungry,” he said. “Hey, do you guys have any juice?”

You couldn’t help it. You laughed.

[digitalworldbound]

miyako and hikari (platonic) for 133?

Number 133: “Slushies aren’t just for kids. Fuck society!”

Characters: Miyako & Hikari. Finally, one of my 02 babies! This is set while the girls are maybe around 15 and 16.

I wrote this in first person as Hikari, just to give it a more casual, carefree feel! I hope you enjoy these teenager-y, summer vibes. The ending kind of sucks, but please ignore it. (Minor swearing) 

Send me a prompt! 

As a certified teenager, it’s safe to assume that I love summer. Why wouldn’t I? It’s the time of the year when you can pretty much do whatever you like. Summer is the grand time where the months-long prep and countdown for family vacations actually come in fruition.

But there’s danger that lurks during summer. It’s the trap of monotony where sleeping late, waking up at noon, watching endless TV, and playing video games for hours become a routine. Well, not if you are friends with Miyako.

Despite chatting with friends into the wee hours of the morning, the girl is an early riser. She’s the “get up and go” type, only grabbing a banana for breakfast as she sprints out the front door. Afterall, an object in motion in stays in motion.

It was the first Saturday of summer vacation when she barged into my room, a flurry of purple hair and lipgloss. “Hika!” she screeched. Miyako was one of the only people that called me by a nickname, and never failed to abuse this privilege. “What are you still doing in bed? If you want to go scope out hot guys on the beach with me, you have to get up. We’re burning daylight!”

I didn’t even have to glance at the clock to know that it was inhumanly early. The coffee machine in the kitchen was silent, and the sound of my brother snoring permeated the apartment. Somehow, I managed to pull myself away from the warmth of a slept-in comforter, yawning all the while. Before my feet hit the floor, Miyako was rummaging through my wardrobe, clicking her tongue in disapproval at my large collection of borrowed basketball t-shirts. “Hmm, where do all these come from, I wonder?” she asked pointedly. She laughed airily, flashing me a wink.

“Ha, ha, Miya, very funny. You know me and him are just friends,” I offered, attempting to stretch the sleep out of my joints. She shook her head in disapproval, purple ponytail swinging behind her.

A note about Miyako: she fancies herself a matchmaker, and believed I was her perfect target.

For years, she has tried everything to pair me up with my best friend. A few summers ago, she locked us both in the hall closet, smushing us between the extra linens and a scratchy, wool blanket. Takeru and I are pretty close, so we weren’t particularly bothered by our close proximity. We might have been able to enjoy our time together had Miyako not forgotten about us. It wasn’t until my brother came home from soccer practice that someone heard our desperate pleas for freedom. Ever since then, she has stayed out of it.

With a hum of approval, she tossed a sundress in my direction.  I barely had time to catch the flimsy, yellow fabric before she barked out another order. “Go to the bathroom and put that on, we need to hurry.”

Another note about Miyako: Never argue with her when she gets in one of her Moods.

My socked feet padded their way silently to the bathroom, pausing only to check the time displayed in the hall: 7:45 in the morning. Changing quickly, I slipped the sundress over last season’s bathing suit, adjusting the straps as the material settled around my hips. Miyako, being a full year older than me, had taken puberty gracefully, filling out gradually and evenly. My body, it seemed, had other plans. The hips seemed to be its first priority, leaving the top of my dress little to fill itself out.

I made my way back towards my room, careful to avoid any creaky floorboards. Miyako sat atop my bed, flicking through a stray magazine. She hadn’t noticed my arrival, and I took my few extra moments of silence to study her.

This past semester, she had shot up several inches, giving her legs the slender look of a model. Her cut-off shorts only emphasized this fact. Her Hawaiian-esque button down should have been tacky, but she left the buttons undone, showing off her camisole underneath. A bathing suit top poked out from underneath it, accentuated her new curves. Compared to her, I felt like a little girl playing dress up.

While I struggled to coax the tangles out of my horrendous bedhead, Miyako gave me the rundown of the day. “Okay, so I was thinking we hit up Starbucks first. They have some new fruity lemonade that I’ve been dying to try, and I’m also kind of hungry.” As if to punctuate her statement, my own stomach growled, and I grinned sheepishly up at her. “Make that two of us,” I laughed.

She rambled on about sunbathing and beach volleyball, the metallic jingle of her bracelets accentuating every point. Miyako talked with her hands, making gestures large and small as if it would help the listener understand her better. Spoiler alert: it never did, but it was fun to watch all the same.

My hair finally tamed, I applied some light concealer, desperate to rid myself of the dark circles clinging underneath my eyes. “You know,” her jingling stops, “You really don’t need any makeup, Hika.”

I only snort in response; taking compliments has never been my forte. Grabbing my purse and phone, I slipped on a pair of sandals. “Okay, I’m ready.”

“Let’s rock and roll!”

-

As one could expect on the first weekend of summer vacation, Odaiba beach was cluttered with people. For mile it seemed the white sand was obscured by sunburnt bodies and an array of towels, but that was understandable.

The passing heat wave had been brutal. One could not go outside without sunscreen, lest risk getting sun poisoning. Within minutes, Miyako sucked her lemonade dry, settling on chewing the left-over ice. “Oh!” she squealed, bits of ice flinging about. “An empty spot, just over there!”

Years of running away from evil Digimon  looked like practice as we narrowly dodged the ample bodies of beach-goers. Arms linked together; our feet kicked up sand behind us as we ran. Just as we were about to secure our small area, a blue beach towel obscured the white sand.

I was panting too hard to notice Miyako’s eyes light up or the stranger’s shadow obscure the sun’s rays.

“Hey, guys! What are you two doing here?” a familiar voice asked, humor lifting at the end of his question. My breathing stopped mid-pant, silently cursing whatever deity that would listen. Once my heartbeat was under control, I managed to stand up straight. Raising a singular eyebrow, I challenged our guest. “Well, Takeru, the last time I checked, this beach is open to the public.”

His blonde hair reflected the sunshine, a soft, golden glow haloing around him. As if I needed any more reason to fall in love with him. He laughed in good nature, smiling a boyish, toothy grin.

“You took our spot.” Miyako pointed out, arms crossed over her chest. Wrinkles formed between her brows, her effort to look more menacing. A pair of heart-shaped sunglasses shielded her hazel eyes, and I almost giggled at the thought of her trying to look domineering while wearing something so innocent.

“Who says we all can’t share?” he countered; blues eyes illuminated by mischief. Never one to back down from a challenge, Miyako stood her ground, “I don’t think so.”

Anxiety clenched at my stomach. As of late, being in a close proximity to Takeru made me nervous, especially when he was shirtless with little rivets of water trailing their way down his abs. He was no longer the cute little eight-year-old that sat with me by the campfire. Years of basketball practice had solidified his athletic figure, and two summers ago, his growth spurt had him towering over his own brother. Seeing him in nothing but a pair of swimming trunks did not help my flushed state.

“It’ll be fine, Miyako. We can just squish our towel beside his.”  Rolling her eyes, she begrudgingly pulled out her Hello Kitty! themed towel, spreading it haphazardly on the ground. “Let’s just get in the water. That’s where all of the cute guys are, anyway.”

Takeru, for his part, pretended not to notice the hostility in her voice. He was as used to her moodiness as I was. Standing there awkwardly, he only made the move to leave as we began to strip down to our bikinis. “I should probably go find Ken and Daisuke. I’ll catch you both later,” he stammered, eyes intently focused on the granules of sand that had clung themselves to his hands.

Looking at each other, Miyako and I burst into a fit of giggles. She had a twinkle in her eyes as she wiggled her eyebrows in my direction. “No, absolutely not.” I deadpan, knowing exactly where this was about to go.

Her glossed bottom lip poked out, her attempt at a puppy-dog look. In my opinion, she looked more like a Kardashian, and when I told her exactly this, the lip was sucked right back in.

Though it was still pretty early, the sun was high in the sky. My cheeks were warm, and my shoulders had turned a light shade of pink. “We need to put some sunscreen on before we fry.”

“Nah, I’m good. I need to work on my tan anyway.” Miyako’s high-waisted bikini bottoms and halter bathing suit top suited her figure, the cornflower blue color complimenting the slight tan she had already developed. She raised an eyebrow at my pink one-piece, but I just shrugged. Shopping for a skimpy bathing suits had never been one of my priorities.

Neither of us felt comfortable oogling guys when our friends were here and apt to make fun of us, so the though of swimming was abandoned. I smeared sunblock on any bit exposed skin, using the technique a toddler would when icing a cake: all hands on deck.  

The pair of us sprawled out, Miyako’s body covering most of the cartoon cat. My pale legs claimed Takeru’s towel as my own. His blonde hair had disappeared in the throngs of beachgoers, and considering that he wasn’t the sunbathing type, I figured he wouldn’t complain.  

Rays of sunshine encapsulated me, and the muscles in my shoulders slowly unwound. Eyes closed, I only half-listened to surrounding conversation. A child begged his mother for ice cream while some teenaged girl made her move. A nearby volleyball game was in full swing, both teams shouting at one another. The summer air was stagnant, smelling of sunscreen, sweat, and salt.

We laid around, soaking in the sunshine and the freedom that came with summer vacation. Those last few weeks of school had been stressful. Between taking pictures for the school paper and studying for any upcoming exams, I had been ready to lose my mind. Takeru had also been acting strange, flip-flopping between avoiding me at all costs or never letting me out of his sight. It had all be so intense that I was grateful for Miyako’s distraction, even if it meant waking up at the ass-crack of dawn.

“Psst.” I whispered. I rolled onto my side, doing my best to ignore the way iced coffee moved around in my belly. In our haste to get to the overcrowded seaside, we had forgone any breakfast, hoping that caffeine would be enough to fuel us throughout the day. The rumble in my stomach proved otherwise.

Miyako groaned, peeking at me through her ridiculously long lashes. Note to self: interrogate her about the brand of mascara she uses.

“Psst, Miyako.” She ignored me once again, opting to rotate like a rotisserie chicken.

“Ugh, fine, I’ll go find food on my own.” I stood up, dusting invisible debris off of my legs. Sure enough, I had my friend’s full attention. Anything that involved eating always got her going. In a flurry of purple hair and sand, she was up on her feet, eyes searching for the nearest snack source. A laugh bubbled out of my throat. Miyako tended to do all things with a theatrical flair, making even the most mundane tasks enjoyable.

Once, in middle school, we were both sentenced to lunch duty. Our job was simple: serve food to our peers. Dishing out food was easy; just ladle the mystery meat on a plate and voila! You were finished. It would have been simple enough, had we not had to wear hairnets and white smocks that made us look more like a middle-aged lunch lady than we ever wanted to. Miyako was never the type to wallow in self-pity. She ignored the looks of sympathy other girls gave us and found pleasure in the odd slurp sound the food made when hitting the trays. Soon, it became a competition of who could create the best squelch, testing out different flinging techniques until we were satisfied. By then end of lunch period, our smocks were littered with oil stain, and our cheeks were sore from smiling.

Miyako channeled her inner lunch lady food-flinging abilities as she practically pushed innocent bystanders out of her way. God help those who stood between Miyako and, well, whatever it was that she wanted. Her ponytail navigated through the crowd, giving me no choice but to follow. Her legs lead us to a slushie cart, manned by a woman who was all smiles and sticky syrup. It might not have been solid food, but I wouldn’t deny myself a sugar high.

A small line had already formed, several children tugging on their parents’ sleeves. My bathing suit clung to my skin uncomfortably. I tried to shift in place, but the air was thick with heat. Aside from seeing my childhood crush half-naked, waking up early hadn’t been the best idea. The sun was high in the sky, my morning shadow disappearing.

The line moved quickly, and before long, the pair of us stood at the front, pondering our choices. Finger resting on her lip in faux-concentration, Miyako made a show of deciding on a flavor “Could I have a mix of wild cherry and blue raspberry, please?”  

“Why pretend to chose when you get the same thing every time?” As a woman of few pleasures, I found a great joy in calling Miyako out. Her flush of embarrassment was a rare sight.  Turning towards the employee, I order the first flavor to have ‘strawberry’ in its name.

A few minutes later, we found ourselves walking along the shoreline. The waves lapped at our bare feet and we slurped on our slushies, rambling on about anything that came to mind.

“You know,” I said, disrupting the natural lull of conversation, “The last time I drank a slushie like this was before I even met you.”

By now, Miyako’s slushie had melted into a dark purple, the last remnants of red dye staining her lips. “But slushies are, like, a summer staple. What’s up with that?”

I twirled my straw around, savoring the last bits of pink ice that had collected on the bottom of my cup. “Well, my brother would probably make fun of me. He already gives me a hard-enough time about my ice cream addiction; he says sweet things are for children.” Switching voices, I lowered my pitch and curled my arms, much like an ape would at the zoo. In a horrible attempt at mocking my brother, I continued, “ ‘Hikari, sweets bad, protein good. Eat more meat.’”

I took a few more steps before I realized she was no longer beside me. Turning around, I barely had time to register the shocked look on her features before she cried out: “Slushies are not just for kids! Fuck him!” Apparently, my friend took summer treats very seriously. 

If her passionate outburst hadn’t of attracted attention, her colorful language sure did. Quickly, I grabbed her arm, hastily pulling her towards our belongings. Embarrassment colored my cheeks as I attempted to dodge the gazes of judgmental bystanders. “Miyako, you can’t just say things like that,” I whispered to her, clenched teeth giving my tone a pinched quality.

“C’mon,” I thrusted her towel into her arms, “let’s get out of here before we get kicked out.”

Pulling on her shorts, she cast me a sideways glance. “I’m sorry, Hika, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

Sighing, I held both of her hands between mine. “You said what you did because you care about me, and I can’t fault you for that.” I gathered up the rest of my own belongings before continuing. “Besides, you forgot to feed me today. I’m thinking we get some McDonald’s. Your treat?”

She laughed, hands now busying themselves with her shirt. “Isn’t McDonald’s for kids?”

Tossing my purse over my shoulder, I turned around and winked. “Fuck society.”

[sasuhinasno1fan]

Kitty at the Garrison

Ok so cross your fingers for me to actually catch up with the other prompts. And yes this is inspired from that one post on tumblr that starts with the same lines. Garrison

“I know what you’re up to and you won’t get away with it.”

“Oh god. I know I’m not supposed to have it in here but it’s so cold outside and I panicked –”

“Wait, what?”

This wasn’t at all what he expected. He was coming back from his tutoring session with Adam, who seemed like the only person who believed that he had a chance of getting into the fighter pilot program, when he saw Keith sneaking around. Keith was the best student at the Garrison and everyone knew it. His test scores were perfect, his flight simulations always passed and he was Shiro’s favourite. He was also stuck up, arrogant and an asshole, at least in Lance’s eyes. He’d tried being nice to him when he first met him and got it thrown in his face. Lance was hurt and tired of getting compared and told how he wouldn’t compare. Some dark part of Lance just wanted to get Keith into trouble. He got into enough of that by himself and was getting in constant trouble for it but he always seemed to get chances. So he went to scare him, maybe get a provocation out of him, but he hadn’t been expecting that response.

He watched Keith undo the top few buttons of his orange uniform shirt and saw a small ginger head poke their head out. It was a kitten.

“Did you see it’s mom?” Lance asked, jumping into fostering mood. His family fostered a lot of cats. The lived near a large colony and would help with TNR a lot of the times. Only when the moms weren’t around or they snuck in the house to give birth there did they take human action and help raise them before adopting them out. “Tell me you didn’t just pick up a kitten without checking to see if it’s mom was there.”

“No, I was outside for hours and I kept my distance. She wasn’t even well hidden so I was sure she was alone but I double checked.”

“Ok, I need to get a better look at her to find out how old she is but we need to get her warm first.” Lance started listing off.

“Wait, we?”

“Yes we. There is no way that kitten has a chance if you’re the one raising it. I’m helping you. Now, do you have a heating pad or something?”

“No?”

“Ok fine. I’ll do it the old fashion way. Come on, my room is empty now. Hunk still has class.” Without even waiting for an answer, Lance grabbed Keith by his arm and pulled him to the dorms. He opened the door to his room, revealing the messy yet well lived in room. The loft beds weren’t made and the desks that were under them were almost just as messy. One loft bed had posters and pictures all around it while the other seemed to be covered in gadgets and cook books.

Lance threw his bag on the desk with the photos and opened one of the drawers to pull out a bag of rice. He also pulled out a can of KMR, kitten substitute, a bottle and a small can have wet food. He also pulled out a package of sock and pulled out one side, pouring some of the rice in the sock and stuck it in microwave. He saw Keith was still standing in the middle of the room, the kitten still curled up.

“Off.” He ordered.

“Huh?”

“Take your jacket off.”

“What?” Keith asked scandalized.

“So I can see the kitten idiot. I need to know how old she is and check if it even is a she.”

“Oh.” Keith undid the rest of his shirt and let Lance take the kitten from him. She felt thin and cold, no doubt from the sudden chill the area was experiencing. She was wiggling in his hands a lot. He didn’t have a scale to measure her she he gently opened her mouth and peeked inside. Her incisors were poking out and he saw the beginnings of canines, so she was 3-4 weeks. A quick peek under the tail proved she was a girl. “Go into the closet and on the floor there’s a tub. Grab one of the blankets in there so she can get warm with the heating pad.”

“What heating pad?”

“The rice filled sock? It’s gonna act as a heat source for her. Luckily, whoever her mom was didn’t leave her really young. She still needs to be bottle fed and there’s a chance she might already go to the bathroom by herself already but we’ll have to wait to find that out.”

“How do you know all this stuff?” Keith asked pulling a blue blanket out of the bin.

“My family fosters kittens. Animals aren’t allowed in the buildings unless service animals but I always have the items ready just in case.” Lance noticed Keith staring at him. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just…you usually seem to have nothing better to do than poke and prod at me so I didn’t realise you’d care about this sort of stuff.”

Lance bristled at that. “It might not accrue to you in the mullet head of yours, but I have other things I focus on and knocking you off your high horse is one of them. And another thing, even if I didn’t know how to properly take care of a young kitten, that wouldn’t stop me from trying. So how about you stop judging me and help me.”

Keith looked slightly apologetic and handed Lance the blanket, which Lance wrapped the kitten in and pulled the rice filled sock out of the microwave.

“Now start the kettle, I’ll teach you how to make a bottle. Once she gets warms, she’ll realise how hungry she is.”

Keith listened to Lance’s orders and watched as the hungry kitten downed the bottle of milk.

“Good girl, you were really hungry, weren’t you? Now the question is where the heck are we gonna keep you? Hunk is gonna be back in two hours, 3 if he decides to go sneak into the kitchen and cook something seeing how tonight is taco night. I swear, my family is Cuban, doesn’t really like tacos and can do better tacos than this place. She can’t stay here.”

“Well actually, I have a room all to myself.” Keith said.

Lance rolled his eyes, “Of course you do.”

“For your information, my roommate dropped out of the Garrison. All the other rooms were filled and no new students came in so I have the room all to myself. We can keep her in there.”

Lance thought for a second. “Fine. But I’m still helping to take care of her. I still don’t trust you to do this correctly. And you can’t tell Shiro, he’ll just go and tell Iverson.” Lance demanded.

“I can keep a secret.”

“But you can’t control your hair.” Lance muttered loud enough.

“Excuse me?”

“Pay attention, will you? She still has to be stimulated to go to the bathroom, unless she can do it herself, which in that case, you’ll be doing laundry a lot more. It’s gonna be kinda hard to hide a litter box.”

Keith sighed, like he was wondering what the hell he got himself into.

Keith flicked a wad of paper and watched the 5 week old kitten dash after it. She might just be at the age of wanting to start play but she was catching on pretty quick. Still a bit wobbly though. He still couldn’t believe he was keeping a cat in his dorm. It was a hassle having to rush back and forth between classes and his room to feed her, even with Lance’s help, but he was enjoying it. Even the extra time with Lance. He wasn’t sure if they’d ever truly consider themselves friends but they were pretty close. After the kettle in Lance’s room broke, they had to sneak into the kitchen to get hot water. Which meant Lance having to go and make some sort of fool of himself to distract everyone so Keith could fill a thermos of it. They worked well together surprisingly. Lance was still in charge of taking care of the kitten and he made it pretty well known. Keith just put up with it but Lance did know best. He’d watch Lance play with the cat and cuddle her, gently stroking her sleeping body with the pleasant smile on his face.

Speaking of which, Lance was late. His tutoring session with Adam had apparently been cancelled so Keith thought he’d be over once his classes ended.

There was pounding at his door, which startled the kitten.

“What?”

“There’s surprise inspections going on, they’re heading to our section next. I’d hide your things.” A cadet yelled from outside the door.

Shit. Fuck. Damn it.

Surprise inspections were just how they sounded. Different members of the staff would each take a section of the dorms and search all the rooms to make sure the students didn’t have anything they weren’t supposed to. They’d almost taken his mother’s dagger one time, but let it go when he mentioned it was a family heirloom. However that wasn’t going to fly with the kitten. He scooped up the kitten and hide her under one of the blankets at the end of the bed before shoving all the obvious cat stuff into his bag. The kitten started mewing in confusion but Keith quickly shushed her. Shiro had left a week ago on the Kerberos mission and even though he knew Adam and Shiro left on bad terms, Adam was still nice to him. He was hoping Adam would search his room, he’d understand.

“Inspection!”

Shit. It was Iverson.

With one last shush to the kitten, Keith opened the door, standing out of the commander. The man’s single eye took in the room.

“I should hope I don’t find anything in here.”

“No sir. Nothing at all.”

“Cadet, do you not have access to a broom? The floor is covered in paper.”

That it was. It was the simplest toy for the kitten to start playing with so pages had been ripped from his note books and made into balls. Most of them would end up in places the kitten didn’t want to reach so Keith would just make more.

“I was writing an essay sir. Wasn’t happy with what I was been writing so I tore it from my book.”

“Try not to kill the planet more.” Iverson ordered.

“Yes sir.”

The man walked around the room, Keith following him, hoping there weren’t anymore opportunities for him to get caught. He opened the closet, drawers from his desk and the extra storage containers. Keith glanced up to where the kitten was hiding, glad the blanket wasn’t moving. He might just get out of this. Then of course, Iverson lifted the mattress and the kitten made her displeasure known, loudly.

“What the?” ripping the blanket away, the kitten meowed even louder. Iverson turned to Keith, who looked away.

Shit. Fuck. Damn it.

Lance stood by the door that lead out to the parking lot and watched as a Garrison Jeep pulled in and Adam got out. He didn’t bother waiting for him to come into the building, Lance ran out to meet him instead.

“Is it true? Did they expel Keith?”

“No thankfully not. Luckily your sister pointed out everything that Keith had was to help raise the kitten, so most of the board couldn’t find fault in Keith taking in a kitten to take care of it, especially after the cold front.”

“Did he say who helped him?”

Adam looked confused. “What are you talking about? Keith said he found and raised the kitten himself. Apparently, he fostered kittens before so had the stuff needed.”

Lance was surprised. Keith never told the board he was involved.

“Where’s the kitten now?”

“With your sister. Why?”

“I need you to do me a favour and take me to where Keith is.”

“Why?”

“I’ll explain later. Just wait for me ok?”

Lance ran back inside and tracked Veronica down, where he found her feeding the kitten. She pulled away from the bottle when she saw her other owner though.

“Hey sweetie.” Lance greeted.

“’Sweetie’? Lance how do…wait.”

“I might have been the one to help Keith, but I guess he didn’t give me up for some strange reason.” Lance still didn’t understand why. Ok yeah, they bonded over taking care of the kitten. It’d had might of only been 2 weeks of taking care of the kitten together, but Lance found didn’t hate Keith as much as he did before. They had a few things in common and could actually have a conversation. He still didn’t think it would not be enough for Keith not to give him up.

“Keith said he was the only one involved. He never mentioned you.”

“Yeah, I know. Look, can you help me? I want to take her to Keith. I need to talk to him anyway.”

Veronica looked like she had questions but agreed to help. She signed a pass for Lance to be let off the grounds and packed up the kitten’s things, making sure Lance wasn’t caught as he rushed back out to meet Adam.

“So…last time I checked, you didn’t exactly get along with Keith. How did that change?” Adam asked.

“Well, I found him sneaking back in and after getting yelled at by Iverson that day, I just wanted to get him in trouble. Then I found out he’s snuck this girl in and I knew he’d have no clue how to take care of her. So I told him I’d help and we bonded I guess.”

“I’m proud of you.” Adam said, Lance looking at him in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I know how much you don’t like Keith, even if I do. You could have gotten him expelled but you didn’t because you wanted to take care of the kitten and the fact that you were worried about him tells me you actually care about him.”

Lance shrugged. “I guess so. I mean, he’s not that bad.”

“I’m glad you think so. I think he could benefit from having a friend like you.”

Keith was on the porch of the wooden cabin Adam pulled up. He seemed extremely confused until he saw what Lance was carrying.

“How did you get her back?” He asked, meeting Lance halfway.

“My sister was looking after her.” Keith looked confused. “Communication Specialist McClain? That’s my older sister.”

“Oh. Um, can I?”

Lance let Keith take the kitten out of the bundle he’s kept her in so she wouldn’t squirm during the ride. She quickly made herself at home on Keith’s chest, her claws hooking to his shirt.

“Can I ask you something? You could have told the board that I was also involved, why didn’t you?”

Keith was pretty quiet before he answered. “I didn’t think you deserved to get in trouble. Besides, it would have pushed back your chances in getting into the Fighter Pilot program.”

Lance didn’t think Keith actually had been paying attention when he mentioned that. “But what about you?”

“I get in trouble all the time, this is nothing new.”

“Well, thanks. I thought that since you got suspended for a month, you could take care of her. Usually cats are adopted out at at least 8 weeks and I thought she would benefit staying with someone she knows. I can come by as much as I can.”

“You could get in trouble.” Keith pointed out.

“You’re not the only one who can break a few rules.” Lance answered, a confident smirk on his face.

“I’m sure.” Keith said, a teasing smirk on his face.

Adam couldn’t help but laugh at the scene. Those two, they were like him and Takashi. Maybe when he got back, he could talk things out with him.

[shippingtheswann]

MODEL BEHAVIOR A Captain Swan modern AU  by @shippingtheswann​ for the @captainswanbigbang​ 2017 year!

SUMMARY: Emma is an up and coming model living in LA with her best friend Ruby. Killian is a star baseball player for the LA Dodgers. Their families are close - and they grew up together. However, what happens after not seeing each other for 6 years - when they are forced back into a situation that requires them to reconnect and explore what was once there.

RATING: Explicit

WARNING: There will be smut later in the story, some mention of violence, hard language, mention of pregnancy loss

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

Special shout out to Monica @acaptainswaneternity​ - the artist with this story. I have loved everything she has done for me - so make sure to check her out! She made an amazing cover and the best image sets for each chapter.

Another huge shout out to Nicola @alocin209​ who beta read everything and tried to keep me on target!

Can also be found on FF - Chapter One; Chapter Two; Chapter Three; Chapter Four; Chapter Five; Chapter Six; Chapter Seven; Chapter Eight; Chapter Nine

A/N: Sorry for the slight delay. We lost power yesterday (well, it was scheduled but I forgot - they turn off the power when they move from A/C to heat), so I couldn't post the story last night, as my phone now sucks thanks to the new Iphone Update. But, here we are - Chapter 9. Only two chapters left. I really hope you enjoy this chapter.

With the deep sleep she had the night before, Emma thought that it would take forever for her to fall asleep alone that night. Yet, when she woke in the morning, alone in her bed, she was surprised. The day must have taken a toll on her, enough to make her fall asleep without even getting under the covers or changing her clothes.

They had gotten home around dinner time, exhausted after the long drive. She wanted to talk to Killian about his day, to make sure that the practice had gone well. She knew he was supposed to be home soon. So she waited patiently for a while, hoping to see him before he found his own bed. She was also hoping for an invitation to join him. While she knew, somewhere in the back of her mind she wanted to enjoy more intimate activities with Killian, she realised that want was pretty small. What she really craved right now was just his touch, his hands wrapped around her hips, drawing her in close as they fell into a deep slumber.

She had caught herself daydreaming more and more about him as the day dragged on. After her mother's revelation, she couldn't help it. Almost everything made her think of him, even things that had nothing to do with him. After lunch, her grandfather suggested they head down to the main area and take a look at the new expansion. She rode in the golf cart with him, Regina and Henry. Nothing about that should have made her think of Killian, yet she couldn't help but picture him beside her, holding her hand as they went over the rolling hills.

She remembered glancing at the clock around nine and wondering where he was. His practice was supposed to end hours ago, yet he still wasn't home. She was sure she heard a car pull up just a few minutes prior, but no movement had sounded in the house. Her body was starting to protest her attempts at staying awake. She knew she needed her sleep too. Tomorrow was a big day and it was going to be a long day too.

So, she let her body take over. She had said she would only take a light cat nap, so she left her lights on and her door unlocked. Hopefully, he would come to her. Hopefully, he would wake her, not wanting to wait till morning to talk to her. As she drifted off, she was thinking about how she would then beg him to stay with her. How he wouldn't be able to say no to her soft plea and the sleepy look in her eyes. She hoped that he would then help her undress, maybe leading to something more.

It was like she could feel his hands removing her shirt and pants. He wouldn't take it any further, as he was a gentleman and he believed in good form. Instead, he would use those fingers of his to gently massage her shoulders as she laid on his chest underneath the softness of her covers. She could almost feel his skin on hers, lulling her into the deep sleep that carried her through the night.

She had fallen asleep with her phone and tablet on the bed with her. After all, she had planned for a cat nap. Looking around in the glow of the morning sun, she could see they had fallen to the floor in the middle of the night. She sent up a silent prayer that her phone kept its charge. She didn't want her phone dying in the middle of Henry's ceremony. She wanted to get as many pictures as possible, but she also knew she would need something to keep her mind busy while the school called out over 1500 names.

She was disappointed to be alone in her bed, her door showing no signs of being opened. Thoughts began swarming in her mind. She couldn't keep them all straight. Part of her tried to explain why he hadn't come to her, why he didn't wake up with her that morning. It tried to tell her that maybe he was just really tired from practice, which she could understand. It told her that he was being respectful by not coming to her so late, wanting to give her a good night sleep before today.

The other part of her was a bit more dramatic. It told her that he regretted spending the night with her, even if he had said otherwise. It told her that he didn't come to her simply because he knew he wouldn't get anything from her other than a place to lay down. It told her that he was a man and needed more. She had always heard of people having an angel and devil on their shoulders, fighting to choose what is right, but she never expected it to happen to her.

Expect they weren't trying to stop her from doing something. They were fighting over whether she should really take this leap with Killian. One part of her was worried that he was just like every other guy out there, that he was just like Neal. The other part thought his gentlemanly ways were just too good to be true.

Emma knew she had to make a decision, and it didn't have anything to do with Killian Jones. She had to decide then and now that no matter what happened, she wouldn't let her fear get in the way. She wasn't going to let her mind play games with her anymore. She had decided yesterday to take the chance with Killian and she wasn't going let something as dumb as him not coming into her room last night scare her away. She wasn't going to let her past, her fears, or her self-doubt take control any longer. She was going to finally get what she wanted.

She marched downstairs with a purpose. She was going to confront him and lay it all on the line. She wasn't going to wait any longer. When she got downstairs though, Killian was nowhere to be found. Finally taking the time to get a bearing of her surroundings, she noticed it was still quite early. Henry had to be at the venue by 10 to prepare for his commencement. Her parents were probably starting to stir, knowing that they had a lot to do that day. The caterers were arriving right after Henry was set to leave to prepare for the party that was going to begin a few hours after the ceremony. Yet, she knew her mother still had some final things to do.

Instead of worrying, she decided she would surprise him with breakfast. The families didn't need to leave for the venue until close to noon, so she had plenty of time to make him something special, to go with her special invitation.

She knew he liked pancakes, or at least he used to. She had a special recipe from her father too, one that Killian had never tried, even though he grew up next door. David's special pancakes were reserved for birthdays and holidays, but Emma decided that this occasion called for a little bit extra. Normally, she would have just used the box recipe and not done anything special.

Her father's recipe called for nutmeg and some vanilla, along with a few other secret ingredients that Emma swore she would take to the grave. She had made them for Ruby and Lacey once before. She could remember Ruby's face as she took the first bite. Emma never really believed in the saying that food could be better than an orgasm, but the ecstasy on Ruby's face made her a believer. The girls begged Emma for the next couple of months to make them again, but Emma refused, saying they are only for the most special occasions. Christmas that year was at Granny's and for all of their birthdays they were traveling, so Emma hadn't made them again.

She flipped the last pancake, hoping that her father would be able to use the rest of the batter when they woke up, which she was sure would be soon. No one in the Nolan household could resist the smell of those pancakes.

She loaded up the tray that her mother kept for breakfast in bed with the pancakes, some coffee, and the special syrup that her dad kept just for these occasions. Special pancakes always called for special syrup he said. Mrs. Buttersworth wouldn't do, so her dad had ordered special flavored syrup from somewhere in Canada just to match his recipe. She laughed at him the first time he explained that to her. Some men order special beer to go with their foods, women paired wine, but her father paired syrup to his pancakes.

She stopped quickly in the bathroom downstairs, wanting to make sure she looked OK. Thankfully she had taken her makeup off right when she got home, feeling sticky and sweaty from the early June summer. Her hair was still braided, with some small flyaways, but overall she looked good. It was thanks to all the beauty regiments they kept her on for modeling. Her skin was her career and she couldn't abuse it. She was letting most of that regiment go for these three weeks.

She padded almost silently back upstairs. She didn't want to wake anyone too soon. She didn't want the questions from her parents or Henry. She didn't want to explain to them why she was bringing Killian special pancakes on a morning that wasn't so special for him. She definitely didn't want to explain anything to them until she explained herself to Killian. That is why she chose to enter his room through their bathroom. She didn't want to wait outside in the hallway for him to answer the door, she wanted some privacy for them and she knew there was a chance that would be ruined if someone happened to walk past her.

She knocked on his door with the end of the tray. At first, she didn't hear any movement and it somewhat disappointed her. Plus, she had her hands full, something she didn't really think about. She couldn't just barge into his room like this. She would need to wait for him to come to her. She was trying to knock again when she heard movement. She heard the fall of his feet on the floor and the shuffling of blankets. She waited, counting the seconds until he finally opened the bathroom door.

Five long seconds. Those five seconds felt like an eternity. Each passing beat was like a bullet being shot at her. Fear was beginning to creep back. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe she should just let things happen and not try to force them. But as she began to think those thoughts, the door to the bathroom swung open and Killian was standing in front of her.

"Swan?" he asked, sleep still hanging on his voice. His hair was messy, more than it was the day before. Yet he was just as handsome and it made a smile creep on her face.

"Morning, I made you breakfast, but I can come back…" she began, starting to feel bad that she woke him.

"Don't you dare take those pancakes away," he smiled as he grabbed her arm. "Thank you for breakfast, would you like to come in?"

Her smile grew as she nodded and walked into his room. She wasn't 100% sure what to do from there, not really planning anything out other than the pancakes and maybe her confession. Thankfully, he did the rest for her. He walked over to his bed and sat down in his spot, the one he occupied the first night. He kept the sheet low along his hips as he situated himself, preparing for the tray. She walked over to him, leaning over to set the tray down over his lap. He was so close it set her skin on fire.

"Something smells good," he whispered, his arms moving to hold her there next to him. With her still bent over, her face almost leveled with his.

"It's just pancakes," she replied in almost a whisper.

"I wasn't talking about the pancakes," he quipped, her head turning towards him. He took the opportunity that was presented and kissed her sweetly. A simple thank you for the breakfast, but there was something behind that kiss that could lead to more. But before anything could escalate, he pulled back with a smile on his face.

"Delicious," he smirked.

She rolled her eyes a bit and moved back. She wasn't sure what to do now. Should she talk to him while he was eating, or should she wait until he was done? If she didn't wait, she would be doing most of the talking or he would ignore his food for her.

"Thank you for breakfast love, but there is something else going on isn't there?" he questioned. His stare kept her in place. "Is it about last night?"

His last question made her finally move. She walked around the bed and sat down next to him, where she realised she was starting to consider was her side. She almost rolled her eyes at her own thought; she had only spent one night in this bed, how could she feel that this was her side and that his? How could she believe that it would always be that way?

Before she could answer, Killian decided to say something else.

"Love, I am really sorry I didn't come to you last night. Well, I tried. I didn't get home till late, then my father wanted to talk to me. By the time I got up to the room, it was well past ten and I thought you might be asleep. I tried to knock on your door but there was no answer, so I assumed you wanted to be left alone," he explained as he cut up his pancakes, trying to avoid eye contact with her. She wasn't sure why, but it was probably the same reason she had tried to avoid eye contact with him. She was a bit embarrassed by it all. Not embarrassed of him, just embarrassed by her behavior. She couldn't believe how she was acting.

"No, don't apologize. I tried to wait up for you, but I must have been so tired. You must have been too. I was just hoping you would come and tell me everything," she confessed.

"Really? That is what I wanted as well. I couldn't wait to get back here to tell you all about it," he added, a smile returning to his face.

He took a bite of his breakfast and made a slight moan. It was erotic watching him eat the pancakes. The way he licked his lips after every bite, making sure to get all of the syrup that came on the fork. She almost had to shake herself out of the spell he was casting on her.

"How was it?" she finally asked as he made his way through the stack.

"Brilliant. It was bloody amazing, Swan!" he sounded so joyful and excited.

"I'm glad to hear it," she replied.

"I haven't felt like that in a long time. It felt good being back on a field where there was little pressure on me to succeed. The guys are mostly young, and I was actually able to help them out, so it was different than what I am used to. The coach is a bit grumpy, but he means well. I really think these next three weeks are going to help me." She could hear the hope in his voice. She was glad that he was finally getting back the love he had for the game.

"You said your father talked to you?" she asked, wanting to put off what she had to tell him for a while longer.

"Aye, he did, but I really don't want to talk about that, I want to talk about you. Why did you make me breakfast?" he questioned.

Shit,she thought, it was now or never. This was the moment where she would tell Killian that she was falling for him, that her feelings for him never once really left her. Taking a big sigh, she turned to look at him, hoping that it wouldn't scare her away. But immediately, she turned back looking down at the comforter she had pulled into her lap. Her hands began to play with a loose part of the fabric.

"I like you Killian, like a lot. I am not really sure what it all means, what this time home means for me, what it means for you, but I know that I want to spend as much time with you as I can. I want to find out what us being here, being with each other means. I know I could get hurt, I know that in three weeks we will both be heading back to LA to live out our lives, but I don't care. I want to see where this all goes. I guess what I am trying to say is…. will you go on a date with me?" Her confession came out quick, but strong. She didn't muffle any words, even if she didn't look at him the entire time. Her hands were holding the blanket tight, unwilling to let go in fear that they might do something crazy.

"Shouldn't it be I doing the asking part?" his question came almost too quickly.

She finally turned to him, and saw a smile on his face. The sleep was almost entirely gone from his eyes. He was wide awake now and there was joy to his emotions. Her jaw went slack, unsure what to think of the situation.

"Um….." she mumbled.

"I would love to go on a date with you, Emma Swan. I would love nothing more, but on one condition," he replied, moving the tray that was now empty of pancakes onto the floor before turning to pull her hands in his.

"Let me plan the date? Say tomorrow? Pick you up at your room?" he asked playfully.

"What, do you think I can't plan a date?" she replied, finally finding her words.

"Not at all, but since you made a confession, I will make one too. I've been thinking of asking you out since yesterday morning, so since you robbed me of that moment, allow me the honor of planning our date. I promise you won't be disappointed," he beamed.

"Alright," she almost whispered.

Before any other words could be said, he pulled her to him, his arms coming to wrap around her waist. His lips on hers were rough and fast, pouring all of his emotions into the kiss. It was similar to the kiss they shared before she left yesterday morning. A hunger grew in her belly. She needed more. Kisses wouldn't be able to hold her any longer.

She moved quickly, positioning her body above his, only the thin sheets and their clothes between them. Her arms snaked around his neck, trying to pull her body as close to his as she could get. His arms moved from her waist up and down her back, playing with the hem of her night shirt. She could feel him grow beneath her and without thinking, she pressed herself down onto him, gyrating just a bit, just enough to have him growl at the motion. His teeth came out and took her lip between them, biting slightly.

Her hands moved from his neck down his body, feeling every hard inch as she went. His hands mimicked hers, except they moved up and under her shirt. She wasn't wearing a bra, so when his hands made contact with her nipples, they perked instantly under his touch. She moaned into his mouth, craving more. His touching on her skin was leaving a trail of fire in their wake. She had never had someone touch her the way Killian did. His hands were rough, but his touch was gentle. He gripped her in a way that made her need more of him. She circled back down on him, feeling his length rub against her spot. God if this was anything like real sex with him, she didn't know how long she would be able to last. His fingers tweaked her nipples and caused her to break their kiss, throwing her head back. She tried hard to not yell out, knowing that someone in the house would hear her.

Her hands finally made their way to their destination. As she began to slip one beneath the elastic of his pants, she felt him move beneath her. He was quick and decisive, placing her on her side so that she was facing him, leaving a small space between them. Without missing a beat, he was back kissing her, silently pleading with her to continue her assault on his body. Her hand finally weaved down his pants, and grabbed a hold of his cock. He was bigger than she imagined, even though she had felt him a few times before. She didn't really move, just gave it a bit of a squeeze as she kissed him harder.

His hands moved from her breasts down to her shorts. They trailed over her clit through her clothes, teasing her. If he didn't touch her soon, she was sure she was going to explode. His hand began to trail up towards the top of her shorts when a yell came from beneath them.

"Emma, are you up?" Shit Emma thought, her mother.

As quickly as things had escalated between them, they dwindled. Emma pulled herself away from him, missing his touch immediately. She knew that their moment was over, but that there was a chance for more moments later.

"Yes!" she yelled trying to keep her voice calm. Thankfully she knew her mother couldn't tell which room the bellow came from. "Be down in a minute!"

She turned back towards Killian who looked a bit annoyed with the situation. He was lying on his back, his skin red and lips swollen. He looked delectable, and Emma cursed her mother for having the worst timing.

She leaned over his body, her hand sneaking across his chest.

"I guess we'll have to finish this later," she said, peppering kisses along his jaw.

"Aye love, I guess we will have to," the annoyance that she saw was clear in his voice.

"Gotta go, see you downstairs," she winked as she planted one last kiss, a promise, on his lips.

The next couple of hours lasted way too long. She went downstairs after her mother called for her and ate breakfast with them. Her mother asked why she had made some pancakes already. She lied and said she just couldn't wait and knew her father would be making them anyway. They seemed to take that as a perfectly acceptable excuse and continued on with their day. Her parents were too excited to wait and gave Henry his graduation present early. He was going on a trip across the country! Henry's dream had always been to road trip with his friends to California for Comic Con then road trip back home. Her parents are helping his dreams come true. The only stipulation was that Henry was going to visit Emma for a week in LA. She didn't mind, not at all. She couldn't wait to show Henry around.

All too soon, Henry left for school. She knew Killian had already showered, as when he finally came down from his room, he looked calm and collected. She could also smell the slight scent of her shampoo. Some pretty dirty thoughts popped in her head when she saw him again for the first time and the smell of her shampoo made them so much worse. She could almost imagine showering with him, basking them both in the scent.

She excused herself to shower while Killian tried to get out of eating even more pancakes. But just like everyone in the Nolan family, he couldn't say no to more special pancakes. Emma laughed to herself as she climbed the stairs. She ate almost six herself, way more than she normally would, so she was sure Killian had room for more.

She took her time in the shower, hoping to move along the morning. They had some time until they would need to leave. She didn't think she would be able to handle just sitting around the family room with Killian, letting the attraction stir between them. The air would be too hot, too stifling.

She washed her body more than twice, took extra care with her hair, even shaved. She didn't need to, since she was a religious waxer thanks to her schedule with modeling, but anything to take up more time. When the shower began to run cold, she knew it was time to get out. She took her time getting ready from there. Normally, she would have just slightly blowed dried her hair, allowing it to fall more naturally. Today, she went all out. Why not, right? Your little brother only graduates from high school once.

By the time she was done, she looked ready for a shoot. Over the years she had picked up tips and tricks from the professionals. Her makeup was artfully applied yet looked natural. Her hair fell perfectly, framing her face and body in a way that would drive Killian mad, she was sure of that. The dress she had chosen to wear just made her that much more attractive, even if she did say so herself. It was a long maxi dress, but it had a huge slit that came almost to her hip. The top portion perfectly accented her cleavage.

She knew she shouldn't make it harder on him, because she was already having a hard time keeping her hands off of him. Yet she couldn't help herself. She wanted to tease him a bit, the same way he was beginning to tease her this morning. This dress would be the perfect weapon.

By the time she was walking back down the stairs she only needed to waste 15 minutes before they would all leave to head to the venue. She could deal with 15 minutes, especially when she heard Brennan talking. She wouldn't be stuck alone with him, with no one to stop her from taking him by the tie and pulling him off until everyone was ready.

It wasn't until they were splitting into cars that reality came back to bite her in the ass. Her parents were going to take their sports car to the venue, since it was such a nice day, and David said they needed something to keep her mother's mind occupied. Mary Margaret was still concerned she forgot something for the party, even though the backyard looked amazing and the food was on schedule. Brennan and Adelaide were also opting to take their sports car. So that left Killian and Emma to take one of the family cars, joined by Evie. Awkward was the nicest word Emma could find to describe that car ride.

She wanted to be close to him, but as he drove it was difficult. She saw him taking glances at her every chance he had. She saw the way his eyes fixed to her body when she entered the family room. She noticed the shift in his body when the slit of the dress was revealed. Her plan almost soured when he walked past her on their way to the car, when he whispered a comment about her dress.

"You are breathtaking, Swan," he whispered, the tone of his voice anything but innocent. She knew she would be paying for that dress later, in a way she wouldn't mind. The wink he gave her as he walked away made her weak in the knees.

Thankfully, they had to be seated in separate areas of the venue. The high school rented out the large college stadium near the school for the event. Families were given four special tickets that gave them lower seating, closer to the action. Anyone else who wanted to attend had to take the upper level seating. Emma was glad they wouldn't be sitting together for hours. The ceremony was to begin at one and wasn't supposed to end until at least 3 hours later. That is what happened when you had a large high school. Emma could remember one year where the ceremony lasted 5 hours. That year, the valedictorian ran over in their speech and since then, everything was limited and practiced multiple times, so that families didn't have to stay at the ceremony for too long.

The whole thing was pretty boring. If you've been to one high school graduation, you've been to them all. She was going to spend the time playing some game on her phone, but instead, she found herself daydreaming about Killian, something that had been happening way too much.

She had gone from not thinking about him in a few years, to thinking about him constantly in the past three days. Three days had changed so much in her life. Never did she expect the last few days to go anything like how they have. It was only a few days ago that she walked into her bedroom to find her skeezy boyfriend in her bed with someone else. What followed this was Killian coming back into her life, like no time had passed between them at all.

She thought coming home would be a challenge. She thought that she would hate the time at home, but Killian changed everything. She could already tell that she wouldn't want to leave at the end of the three weeks. Things at home with her mom were slowly getting better, her head was clearing and things seemed to make more sense; it was becoming obvious that these changes came because of Killian.

Thoughts drifted to tomorrow. What did he have planned? And had he really been thinking the same things she had been for the past couple of hours? Would he have asked her out soon, if she didn't jump the gun and ask him first? Normally, she wasn't one to take those risks. In her relationship with Neal, things were traditional. Neal wore the pants, he made the decisions. The only thing that was different was she paid for their apartment. Yet when she thought of Killian, she couldn't help but speed things up. She had said they would let fate take them where it may lead, but Emma wanted fate to move things along, not take its damn time.

Before she realized it, Henry's name was being called. Tears began to form in her eyes as she watched her little brother walk across the stage. His face was being projected on the screens that line the stage. His smile was contagious. She was so proud of her brother. Beside her, her father had wrapped her mother in a tight hug. Her mother had tears streaming down her face, so happy for her son to finally be graduating high school. She was sure that there were a few other things her mother was feeling, but in that moment, Emma knew that even if her mother didn't always agree with her, she always did love her and Henry.

Things moved quickly once Henry was across the stage. The ceremony ended sooner than anyone thought and all too soon, they were back at the Nolan residence getting ready for the party to begin. Emma knew there were other family members that sat in the upper section near the Jones' and they would be arriving soon. Her mother made sure that there was some time between the ceremony and party, to give them plenty of time to do any finishing touches.

Her mother put Emma to work setting out the party favors. Emma really couldn't understand why a graduation party would have party favors but she knew better than to question anything her mother wanted for a party. Thankfully, Killian and the Jones' were also put to work. The car ride back from the ceremony was identical to the car ride to it. Emma was thankful for the time spent in Killian's company, but couldn't wait to be in the open air.

Killian was in charge of making sure the strung up lights were working and there were no burned out bulbs. It gave her ample opportunity to stare at him while he worked on the ladder. His arms were contracting in amazing ways, his back stretching underneath the tight white shirt he had worn underneath his ceremony gear.

He did take time during the setup to sneak glances at Emma too. She could feel his eyes on her, especially as she walked back and forth from the garage to get more favors and other random decorations. The tension between them was palpable. It was a good tension though, one that kept her smiling with thoughts of what was to come between them.

As she walked into the garage for the probably 13th time, Killian cornered her, pressing her into a darkened corner. His lips were on hers instantly. No words passed between them, instead they let the chemistry flow freely. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her close. The kiss lasted less than a minute, but was a promise of things to come. As quickly as he jumped on her, he left. Again, no words were said, but a wink was on his face as he left the garage. She was out of breath and completely taken aback by his behavior. She realized it was his way of getting back at her for the teasing she had been giving him all day. She had to admit, she liked the punishment.

For the next thirty minutes, things went the same way. He snuck kisses from her whenever possible. Once behind the tree house as she walked back there to get a stray decoration, once when she went into the house to take a bathroom break. More than anything else, she constantly felt his eyes on her.

Never before had she felt good when a man looked at her the way Killian did. When Neal looked at her, there was always something behind his gaze. She never truly felt love, acceptance or understanding when he looked at her. When men in LA stared at her, it made her feel squeamish, like she was just a piece of meat. However, Killian's gaze made her feel good. She knew he was only looking at her with longing and compassion.

As the party began, she had hoped that she would be able to steal some time with Killian. There would be more people around, which meant less time that anyone of significance would have with him or her. She wasn't ashamed of him or what they were doing, but since she still wasn't 100% sure what their relationship meant, she didn't want it under any scrutiny.

However, more people came to the party than Emma thought. A bunch of Killian's friends from high school heard he was in town and stopped by to see him. Emma's old friends did the same. Thankfully, most of them were already invited and Mary Margaret didn't seem to mind the few extra stragglers. She always ordered way more food and drinks than were needed, so maybe it just meant less food they had to store at the end of the party.

Their friends kept them apart most of the party. She hadn't seen Lily or their group since she left for LA. She thought that at least some of them would have tried to keep in touch, but they didn't. Sure, she knew what some of them were up to; Facebook allowed her the option to stalk them when she got bored, but other than random Happy Birthday posts, she hadn't heard from any of them.

"So, Killian is here…" Lily started to ask her after they had been catching up for a couple of minutes.

"Yeah, we actually were on the same flight out here," Emma started, already annoyed at the tone in Lily's voice.

"And you are OK with him being here? After all the shit he put you through?" she questioned.

Emma was blindsided by the question. Out of everything that had happened over the past couple of years, this is what Lily had to harp about. Their catch up had been quick; Emma telling her about living in LA, graduating college, getting modeling gigs, while Lily told Emma how she married Walsh, had two kids, got divorced, and worked in a diner. Instead of Lily asking about anything else, she had to ask about Killian. It blew Emma's mind.

"Yes, actually. We talked on the plane a bit and a few times since. He's actually staying in the guest room since his brother is down as well," Emma said, trying to sound perfectly happy.

"I don't know how you do it Ems, after everything he did, how much of an ass he was, how he just stopped all communication. I would have kicked his ass. I mean, doesn't it hurt, knowing he got so much out of life, even after the shit he pulled?" Lily pondered.

Emma was fed up. Her anger started to pool in her mind. How dare Lily even bring that up? She had no idea what any of them had been through and it wasn't like her life had been perfect.

"No, it doesn't make me angry. We've both grown up a lot since then. He apologized for his behavior, and I apologized as well. We are friends again," Emma said, hoping to end Lily's inquisition.

"Well, I just don't want to see you get hurt again. He hurt you once before, and you never know, he could do it again. I mean, I didn't think that Walsh could ever cheat on me but he did it twice. I just don't want you to get too attached to him again. Besides, it isn't like you two would be able to actually have a relationship this time. Even if he is single, you both travel so much, it would never work. I'm just looking out for you," Lily said, with a fake concern in her voice.

Emma realized Lily had always had that tone. Even when they were younger, when Lily seemed to care, she just didn't want anyone to be happier than her. In fact, Emma didn't think her graduation party would have gone the same way if Lily hadn't gotten her drunk.

"Thanks for the concern Lil. Hey, I need to check in with my mom. Catch you later," she said quickly, walking away before her emotions got the best of her.

She was angry that someone who didn't seem to care about her over the past six years, now seemed to overly care about her well being. She was pissed that she couldn't focus on the present instead of the past. But what frustrated her the most was that the things Lily had said were some of the fears that slowly crept back into Emma's subconscious, without her friend's help. She had already been having some of those feelings for a while. Even if she didn't want to admit it, Emma worried that their careers would take them from each other. She worried that he would do the same thing he did all those years ago, leave her and not give any explanation.

She had told herself too many times over the past three days, while she fought with her own mind, that Killian was different now, she was different now. Sure, it may happen, but she would rather enjoy the time with him than worry about what would happen after him. At least that is what she kept telling herself. She knew though that the fear was still there. She had been hurt too many times before and she just wasn't sure if she could survive it again.

She walked quickly out of view of the party, walking into the Jones' backyard and to the swing that sat under their large tree. She wanted to believe in her and Killian. She wanted to believe that he could never hurt her again. She wanted to experience everything with him, but now she wasn't quite sure if it was something she could risk.

"Love, is everything OK?" she heard a small voice say from nearby.

Of course Killian had followed her. She shook her head a bit, mostly out of her own annoyance that she didn't think that he would follow her. Of course he would; he wasn't the same Killian.

"I guess I just needed some time," she explained, trying to keep her voice even.

"I saw you talking with Lily, how was that?" he asked, but she knew he already knew it didn't go well. It seemed that she was still an open book to him, even now in the dark.

She didn't reply. He walked over to her and placed his hands above her head on the swing. He towered above her from behind. It felt good having him standing next to her, almost protecting her from all the negative thoughts that were surrounding her. Those feelings seemed to melt away when he was around her. In his presence, she felt that he would truly never hurt her again, that he would try to be the man he wanted to be.

"So I never really told you why I was coming back home for your graduation party, did I?" he asked, moving his hands from the rope of the swing down to her shoulders.

Again, she shook her head, knowing he could see her. She was surprised he was willing to talk about it. She thought they had put their past behind them, wanting to leave what happened all those nights ago in the past. She did wonder why he was coming home that day though. In her mind, she imagined it was because he was going to confess his feelings for her, but she also thought it was simply because he missed his family and friends.

"All those years ago, whenever we talked, I always felt complete. Like for once, someone was finally listening to me and really hearing me. You cared about what I was going through, and I cared about you and what you were going through. Over the months, I felt compelled to be near you. The messages and phone calls weren't enough. I just knew I had to see your face, to make sure what I felt for you was real. So much was going to ride on that, so I had to make sure," he confessed.

Emma wanted to look into his blue eyes, but her face was glued onto the grass beneath her feet. Was he admitting to feeling the same way she felt towards him all those years ago?

"I had fallen in love with you all those years ago. I didn't think I could actually have a life without you. That was until Milah came back and changed everything. Something inside of me made me think that you didn't matter, that nothing but that baby mattered. I am so sorry for doing that to you. I am so sorry for making you think that you didn't mean anything to me, when at the time, you meant almost everything," he finished.

Finally, Emma looked up at him, almost not believing anything he had said. Did he really just say he once loved her, that she almost meant more to him than his own child?

She didn't get to respond, as he continued.

"When I finally saw you again, it was like things were finally falling back into place. All those feelings I had for you came rushing back. You listen to me in a way that no one else listens. I know you are scared of what could happen, I can see it. I understand it. But know this, I don't want that to happen, not this time. What I am feeling for you is strong and powerful and I am not sure what it means or where it will lead, but like you, I want to see where it will take us." His voice was strong but low as he walked around to kneel in front of her.

His hands came up to cup her cheek, pulling her gaze from the grass to his face.

"I'm sorry I let people put fear into me again. I keep going back and forth. One minute I trust you and I am so glad you are back in my life. I want this and I want you. But then, something happens and I get scared again. We've just been hurt so much in the past and I don't know if I can survive being hurt again," she confessed, looking into his eyes.

"I get it, Swan, but I know no matter where life takes us, no matter what it throws at us, I would rather spend a few weeks with you, than no weeks. I also know that at least if this, whatever it is between us was to end, I would still consider you my closest friend. I just hope I can prove to you that I would never purposefully hurt you," he said.

Instead of replying, Emma kissed him. She leaned forward and pushed her lips to his. His words were just what she needed to hear. She wanted to make sure that they were in this together, that he didn't just want to relive the past, but change their future.

"Come on, I think it's time for bed," she said as she pulled back, a small smile on her face.

The party was still going on, but Henry had left a while earlier. Her parents and the Jones' would be keeping the party going for a few more hours too. In her mind, the party was over and it was her time to have Killian all to herself. She had originally thought about what the night would hold for them, but as they climbed the stairs of the Nolan house, sneaking in through the front door so no one would see them hand in hand, she felt dead on her feet.

"You looked absolutely beautiful today, Swan," he said once they were in the privacy of his room. He was behind her, his hands snaking around her waist to pull her closer.

"You looked rather dashing as well," she smiled.

He helped her undress, handing her a shirt for her to sleep in. It smelled just like him and was surprisingly the most comfortable thing she had ever worn.

She climbed into the bed, sighing as her head hit the pillow.

"How about I tell you a story to help you sleep love, that way you are 100% rested for our date tomorrow?" he winked again.

"Sounds like heaven," she replied, moving to place her head on his chest.

As he began a story of the time most of his team in the minors went to Jamaica to celebrate the end of the year, but one of the younger kids got them into a load of trouble, she fell into another peaceful sleep, all the worries about their relationship, their past and their future fading away.

[adventuresof-ernie]

Monday we pulled Ernie out for a bit of bonding. As you may know if you’ve been keeping up with the story, we’ve tried giving him treats to help with the bonding process, first with meal worms, and also with apples, neither of which he’d cared about or tried to eat. Today we tried chicken, as his previous owner told us he liked chicken. He was very excited and ate it, but he quickly anointed, (as you can see in the video above) which I found strange, as I’ve read that they only do that when they taste or smell something that they’ve never tasted before. Perhaps we prepared it in a different way than he was used to, as Jesse fried it.. but there was no sauces or spices or anything, just plain white chicken breast in a dry pan... We’ve seen him anoint before, but never this much, this was quite a bit more “foam” than I’ve seen so that’s interesting. Of course we had to give him a bath after that, which is like his favourite things so of course he was plenty happy. Honestly, I was holding him in a towel when I went to the washroom, and as soon as I turned on the tap he perked right up!! I’m telling you, this little guy LOVES baths. This was like his 4th or 5th bath since we brought him home less than a month ago though, so I’m hoping we can slow down the trend! Once he was dried off, I put some more vitamin E on him, and he ran a few laps around the couch before 20 minutes of bonding with Jesse. He was pretty happy, as he usually is after bath time.

Tuesday we had a “Snuggle Sack” with us which Ernie seemed to like, he would settle in it on our laps and that was that. He still go into his huffy-puffy fits, however they would be over much quicker than if he didn’t have one. So we’re maybe starting to find some things that this grumpy gus actually likes. He spent about 5 minutes on the couch wandering around, he then spent half an hour in his snuggle sack on Jesse’s lap, and then half an hour in the snuggle sack on  my lap before we put him into his “new remodeled” bin. If you want to read more about that, check it out here >>http://bit.ly/2mVAwHS<<

On Wednesday Ernie was like a whole new hedgehog!! When Jesse woke up at 5am, he could hear Ernie running around in his wheel, and when I woke up at 6:45, I could STILL hear him running around! I knew that once he heard me get up (and subsequently the cats start meowing at me for breakfast) it would startle him and he would hide in his castle, so I stayed in bed a few more minutes to let Ernie be himself. At around 6:55 he stopped running in his wheel and started eating a lot! I got out of bed at 7:00am and the cats came with me, and by the time I made it to the living room, he was already burrowed in his castle. When Jesse got home from work around 2pm, he says that Ernie was out of his castle and up and about and looking around, which is unusual for him during the day time! Jesse took advantage by taking Ernie out of his bin and letting him run around on the couch for a bit, and then brought him to his playpen to explore in there a little more. 

At about 9pm we pulled him out of his bin again for some bonding time with us. I put him in his snuggle sack and put him on my chest and he was huffy puffy for a little while, then Jess took him from me and put him down on the coffee table for a moment and he opened right up immediately! So we let him  run around there for a few minutes. He anointed with Jesse’s leather wallet. lol.

It was really exiting to see how open he was. I’m not sure why there was such a big jump in his mood all of a sudden, whether he’s getting more used to us, or he’s physically more comfortable with the switch to fleece and his nail trimming, our attempts to keep his skin from getting too dry... but I am SO in love!!

Look at him in Jesse’s hands, he’s not in ball form! That’s a big deal!!!

Wednesday was a big day. I hope this is us making progress! <3

On Thursday we pulled Ernie out around 8pm. He opened up and wandered a little bit around the couch, and then Jesse decided to put him on the coffee table again... he LOVED it, he ran around and pushed coasters around, jumped over remote controls - it was the sweetest thing! Jesse decided to let him get a little more active and we put him in his play pen. He actually wandered around for 15-20 minutes and went half way through his tunnel (before squirming out the way he came in backwards) before finally going into his hide, which usually happens close to right away, if not right away! I genuinely feel like he’s really warming up to us and it’s just SO nice! :) 

Friday night we brought him out on the couch for a bit and he wasn’t too interested. He seemed to be having a grumpy day. He wandered around a little bit on the couch and then curled up and went to sleep, so Jesse put him back in his bin since he was sleeping anyways, but then we heard him running on his wheel a little while later, so we figured since he wanted exercise now, we’d put him in his play pen. He ran around a little bit and the a few minutes later buried himself in his hide. This time he didn’t even look for the “door” he got his nose under the corner and lifted it up with his face so he could get in. We shut the door and gave him some privacy and then when we were going to bed, we out him back in his bin for the night.

On Saturday I put him in his play pen for 1.5-2 hours while I did his laundry (Washed his bedding, fleece strips, towel, etc.) Since I was home alone, I would shut the door to the spare room to ensure the cats did not bother him. For the first while he was burrowed under his shredded paper, and he then made his way over to the cardboard box. Typically the shredded paper is in the cardboard box, but I pulled them apart today and kept them separate.  The second time I came back up from the laundry room (it was the longest I had been gone of the 3 trips downstairs) I opened the door it felt pretty chilly in that room. We knew that the radiator in the room was broken, and that it is a little chillier than the rest of the apartment, but since the door is typically open, sharing heat with the rest of the space I guess I never noticed how chilly it can get, or how quickly it can get to that point. We do have a heating pad underneath his playpen hoping it would help, but now that I’ve noticed exactly how chilly it’s gotten, I doubt that it is really helping. Since hedgehogs are more susceptible to cold than we are, I’m wondering if he really notices the temperature drop even when the door is open, although we can barely tell. Because of this I  wonder if he will be more active in there once the weather warms up, perhaps he’s borrowing and hiding as a way to keep warm (on top of the fact that he just wants to, I’m sure) but I can’t help but think that might be at least part of the reason. I guess only time will tell!

Once all of Ernie’s laundry was done, I brought him out and put him on the coffee table since he seems to love being on it. I also have it pulled to the side of the room because I’ve been hanging out on the floor the last few days, meaning the table is right up against the radiator, so I thought that would help him warm up from the chilly play pen! He ran across the table twice and then found a cozy spot right next to the rad and didn’t move for a while, he may have been trying to sleep. So I grabbed his snuggle sack and brought him to my lap. He did huff and puff a tiny bit, but he relaxed quickly. Ernie didn’t crawl around on my lap or explore at all like he does with Jesse, but he did hang out there calmly, so I’ll take that as a win!

Sunday was pretty mellow, he hung out with us for a bit, nothing exciting, he kept to himself and was pretty huffy puffy.

[grannygremlinaudio]

the front half of my house reeks of skunk right now and I’m done

Fricken animals. 

The coons have been around since we moved in, but we haven’t seen them much (until this year) since they got evicted from the neighbor’s rear addition when the house sold (3-4ish years ago).  I haven’t seen an opossum since that one that froze to death under my basement steps one exceptionally harsh winter, like 9 years ago.  I’ve never seen a single skunk in the neighborhood until this year, but now they’re everywhere.  I’d be walking down the alley to the corner store and there they are, foraging in the bushes along someone’s property line.  I have learned to watch out, because they’re stupid and arrogant (true fact I found out recently when visiting a Raptor Sanctuary: they have no natural predators other than The Great Horned Owl - that’s because Owls have no sense of smell and the Great Horned is the only one large enough to carry one off  - and we have none of those in the city, obviously).  I mean, they can’t actually see very well at night, so many times they come around the fence/bush right into me.  If I am lucky I can see them coming a ways off and can make noise so they notice I am there before they get too close, so they bugger off another way.  I am starting to wonder if the neighbors think I’m crazy - all they hear is a guy talking angrily (cussing) but calmly to something they can’t see and probably don’t realise are animals.  I bump into (at least) one skunk in my own yard (which is tiny; downtown row house) at least every other night.  I have gotten pretty good at dealing with them, but still have had 2 close calls where the little shit (4 babies + mom; the youngins are pretty dumb - also more dangerous, like venomous snakes, because they haven’t learned to control the amount of shit they release) turned around and raised it’s tail at me.  I have never bolted so fast in my life.

Earlier in the year I was just seeing them in the alley.  Then they were trying to dig under the fence (right by the gate to the inner part of my yard from the outer/parking pad, so I would bump into them all the time) into the neighbors shed (which uses the fence as a back wall).  Had the neighbor give the all clear and I dug down deeper and stuck wood down there so they would give up digging and move on.  That worked, but then they found another spot, just across the back alley from there, again, digging under the fence and floor of my other neighbors outdoor closet/plastic shed thinger.  So they were still around my yard every dang night - but at least I could see them coming. 

I dunno how, but the neighbor evicted them.  Swore that they saw them move to a burrow up the street away from me, but I am seeing them in my yards (both front and back) even more now (them in the front is new).  The front is the worst because they poke out from the neighbors bushes literally a foot away from where I stand to smoke when it’s raining and I’m pinned against the wall/door (which I lock so the smoke don’t get in - not a good latch otherwise).

The other week I was trapped in my house - skunks front and back.  I was livid, like pick a fucking side; stay with your brother(s) you dumb fuck.

Then there started to be incidents.  I guess they’re meeting some of the other local wildlife (in my anger at skunks I totally forgot to mention that I had an opossum almost run right into me last night; apparently they’re pretty blind too.  I was grooming my tomato and bean plants out back, yes I am a nighttime gardener - that’s the time I have available, when I saw something in my peripheral vision, turn around and there’s an opossum there, litterally flipping over in the air within my reach as it realised it was running straight into a larger animal, me in case that wasn’t clear, and freaked out at it’s own stupid, scampering off back the way it came.  I had also seen it, or another, in the alley skulking slowly along the fence a few times this year, which is crazy because the thing about opossums is that you tend to never see them; they are good at the not being seen; their signature move as it were, but back to the skunks).  Had an incident where I was going out back for a smoke, opened the door and nope - there’s that smell - lets go out front instead (yes, one popped it’s head out the bush/picket fence but it was alone so I was able to scare it away with my voice; still had to retreat myself though because the assholes just come again after a few minutes when they think you’ve gone and I’ve been too lucky already).  But it was weak/normal; gone the next morning.  Then I went to the store one time and once I got around the corner in the alley I smelled it.... but then I still smelled it when I got to the store (google claims that’s just < 1/4 km) so it musta been a large, ahem, discharge in an open space (such as that T intersection of the alley) for it to spread like that.

Then last night, somewhere between 3:30 and 5 I got woke up by the stink drifting in.  At first I thought I was dreaming, because I’m inside in bed.  AC so no doors or windows open.  One of the juvenile skunks must have just blown his entire load somewhere under my front deck.  I know houses aren’t perfectly airtight, but damn, it smells so very strong in my bedroom, the front foyer, and the basement below, as if the little shit sprayed inside.  Oddly it is not traveling any further into the house, though I suppose we’ll see what the status of that is when I get home from work.

On the plus side, it covers up the dead animal smell that started from that same area a few days ago... oh wait, fuck shit ass!:

“ stronger skunk smells that have worked their way into fur, clothes, or carpeting can linger for several months to several years if immediate action is not taken. If a skunk has died near or under your home, skunk scent will linger far longer. “ from here

So yeah, this is now going to be the 4th larger mammal (mice don’t count - it’d be double or more) that has died on my property since I’ve lived here (< 15 years).  When I moved in there was a dead cat (orange tabby) under my neighbors front deck, literally just on the other side of the wood separating it from my basement steps.  That was not so bad a smell, and went away quickly (due to neighbor with issues that cat was not removed until the house was sold many years later - that’s one pissed off kitty ghost and it freaked me out occasionally to know there’s a kitty mummy right there... also it was weird because apparently it may have been his cat).  Then the aforementioned opossum under the steps (I actually opened the basement door the night before - it hissed at me so I just went ‘nope’ and went out the back instead; I wonder if it would have survived that frigid night if I had fed it).  Then I was cleaning under my back deck one time, and nearly put my hand into a dead racoon (hilariously posed as if playing dead, on it’s back with it’s tongue hanging out one side of it’s mouth and arms perched up like a TRex; cartoonish aside from the signs of decomposition, which were super gross; the abdominal cavity... never mind you don’t wanna hear it, just feel lucky that you have not seen what cannot be unseen).  I could not get out from under there fast enough let me assure you (and I was a good 5 meters in with only belly crawl room; couldn’t even turn around).  Took me a few hours to chill out, get suited up/supplied and get back under there to remove it (animal control won’t do it for you - you have to bag it and they’ll come get it from the curb; I’m a seasoned veteran by now).  Luckily I had a system down since the opossum (under the steps in a tight spot); garbage bag over a snow shovel, scoop it up and then pull the bag back over the carcass and tie it off in a hurry; coveralls, bandanna, goggles, dust mask and my dad’s old full grain leather engineers gloves.

This dead animal (I know that smell; also the flies - so many flies) is worse than before.  The cat smelled a bit for a while (would come and go with the hot weather the first summer we lived there).  The opossum not at all (frozen solid) and for some reason the racoon didn’t smell that bad either  except right up close (I mean I nearly stumbled right into it without smelling it).  But this is rank. It probably does not help that the death occurred at the start of the biggest fricken heat wave we’ve had so far this year.  The problem is (with all the smell avoidance tricks I know, and a flashlight in the daytime) I was not able to locate the source; no body... so days later the smell is still there (taking my bike in/out to go to work is such a horrible experience, I can’t even put it into words).  The skunk smell is actually a relief in comparison, but not strong enough to cover the death stench when outside the basement door (it does if you’re by the main front door on top of the front porch). ... though the rotting carcass smell does not creep inside like the skunk does, so bit of a trade off there.

Anyway, I know the undersides of both my front and back decks are animal highways at night.  Something died under there, and then a skunk came across it a few days later, and/or another live animal checking it out (apparently, opossums do eat carrion, so that’s my theory), and literally shit it’s pants, and now my life sucks so much more.  I fucking hope that corpse is your mom asshole.

It pisses me off though, because I helped my neighbors get rid of their animal invaders (see above about the  wood preventing the skunks getting in to one neighbor’s shed, and a recent post about helping the other neighbor get rid of a racoon in his porch roof) and the city won’t let me cut down the trees on the rear property line (the corners actually) that prevent me from building a fence (tree growth knocked down the old fence that used to be there). Even though they are nuisance/weed species - a Tree of Heaven (ptui! - one of them ironic names) and a Manitoba Maple.  So on my short street (6 houses) I’m the only one with open entrance, grass/plant life (rest are patio-ed/graveled) and actual full grown trees = wildlife magnet. Like literally we’re an urban mammal oasis and I am so tired of it.  This is even more annoying because the development just N of me was allowed to chop down 5 mature trees (developers can afford the ‘construction’ tree removal permit = close to 10k per tree all in after the fees and replacement costs etc vs 2k for a removal with cause, which I am starting to think they reject 100% of the time to get you to pay more) and the neighbor, where the house was sold, clear cut his rear (over 5 trees, just not mature so the regulations don’t prevent the chop... or they got away with it, whatever).  Even after 1/3rd of the Tree of Heaven fell on my (at the time) new (to me; bought used) car (10K worth of bodywork; glad it was insured).  It is not my job to bear all the responsibility for hosting all the floura and fauna on my tiny block.  I do not concent to this burden! 

In addition to the wildlife, we now have homeless people starting to congregate behind the shelter at the bottom of the street.  I was trying to be cool about it, cuz, you know, I get it, but now they’re doing drugs in broad daylight or defecating as I or my wife walk the kids home from school.  Just everything at once.  There’s screaming and fighting and fucking at night too, though luckily not in the last week or 2.  Not being able to fence my yard also means I have them (and drunken folks from the bars etc) coming in my yard to pee/litter.  I once found stolen property hidden behind my car (a bike), and the junkies (not the shelter party people; different people) try robbing us all the time (have found the car tossed because my wife, in her coming home stress, forgets to lock it; they’ve tried my rear door a number of times, a few successful (I am up late so I have also had altercations I could have lived without).