#a protagonist with a villainous narrator in their brain

[the-modern-typewriter]

Hi, I really love your writing. It’s actually incredible how you can write people of the same pronoun and still make it easy to discern the two characters. I was wondering if you have any tips on how to do that without using phrases like “the short one” or anything like that.

1. Use the character's names

I often use 'the protagonist ', 'the antagonist', 'the hero', 'the villain' on tumblr. However, functionally, I use these like names and/or titles.

Using a character name allows you to periodically clarify who is talking or doing something when the reader would otherwise get confused. I know some people take this a step further by actually using 'Hero' 'Villain' as names more literally/directly, but I don't personally like doing that. It jars my brain.

I think 'the hero' etc works as an indicator where 'the short one' doesn't because it's neutral/not providing new info. Traditionally, we often only use physical descriptors when we don't know who a character is, so it creates distance/can jar when used in the middle of a scene. If you are in first person or limited third, there's just not necessarily a reason why your narrator would think of the other character in that way, which is another reason it can feel odd.

Basically, it's a bit like how we don't notice 'said', but would really notice if someone was uttering/shouting/mumbling in every dialogue tag.

2. Use proper paragraphing.

New character doing something, new line. New person talking, new line. New idea/point, new line. Shift in time or setting, new line.

3. Don't be afraid of easy beats

What are easy beats, you say? They are the moments of action or thinking in between dialogue. Body language. Whatever. Even if you don't use 'he/they/she said', because that can get repetitive. They are a way of providing context and variety to your writing, that can often do double work making it clear who is doing or saying something.

Example:

''So this is dialogue," they said.

"Right."

"And you didn't need to say you were talking next, because it was obviously someone else because it was on the next line. And now it's obviously me again. Hi!"

"All well and good until we've been chatting like this forever."

"Well." They stretched out, lazily. "That's what the easy beat that just happened was for. Did you catch me stretching in the middle?"

"But now I'd need a name or some kind of indicator," Character B replied. "Or it feels odd. Too many theys"

"It's all about balance, my friend. The instinct comes with practice."

Character B wrinkled their nose. "But what if I want to talk for a really long time?"

"Well," they said. "Then you can often start with a pronoun use or a character name to establish. Then you make your next point. Try and keep it relatively easy to follow. After that, try to have some kind of easy beat or action happen so the whole thing isn't talking heads." Character A rose towering to their feet, waggling their fingers in another hello. "And, if we're lucky, we never need to say 'the short one said' again, because we can flow our descriptions more naturally into the action.' Now." They sauntered closer, stopping in front of Character A with the worst smirk that B had ever seen. "Shall we ask the audience which of us is taller?"

[lunar1an]

thinking a lot about wildbow's early works (worm, pact) and his more recent moralistic works (ward, pale) and the sheer difference in narrative empathy

in worm and pact you have characters who do fucked up things but it feels like a lot of effort is put into understanding the people behind them and where they're coming from. rachel's dogs maul people but there's a whole Arc of taylor learning to vibe with her and befriend her and of rachel getting what she needs (a place alone with her dogs where she can let other people in at her own pace) and growing as a person. all from the angle of 'this is genuinely good for rachel and helpful'. we want her to succeed because we care about her.

in pact we see how sandra duchamp grew up, how she's just as much a victim of her family as she is someone who perpetuates that harm, and while she's an antagonist the story doesn't spoonfeed it to us--we're allowed to see her human and sympathetic moments and we're allowed to feel bad for her while also wanting her stopped.

it felt. i don't know. like the story in general respected these characters, respected the reader's ability to empathize with those characters while also knowing Murder Bad or whatever.

but then the major worm fandom interpretations shifted. you had reddit and other popular sources going on about how taylor was actually horrible and an unreliable narrator, and how the undersiders were actually ~super fucked up and evil criminals~. pact and twig were spared this for the most part by virtue of being less popular with those crowds.

and i'm not sure if the morality discourse got baked into wildbow's brain by osmosis or if he felt like he wouldn't be appeasing his fandom if he didn't address it or what.

but by ward suddenly that narrative empathy, for the most part, is missing. it becomes conditional -- the protagonist and others do not extend empathy towards others until they Properly Recognize What They've Done Wrong. any improvement, any attempt to do better isn't legitimate unless the Bad Deeds are addressed and atoned for by whatever inconsistent standards the narrative adheres to. what matters isn't riley being in a healthier place and making connections--ward thinks that we should be rooting for riley because she recognizes she messed up and is constantly making up for the atrocities she committed.

i think it's kind of reached its peak in post arc 13 pale though. every time empathy is extended it's near-always accompanied by a patronizing little reminder of "mmmm, well you did Bad Things too".

you aren't allowed to just say "well damn i sympathize with charles", for example, because the narrative constantly reminds you that actually he is Still Doing Bad and therefore you aren't allowed to feel for him. it doesn't help that the story continually one-ups itself on thinking of ways to make charles over the top evil either.

but either way it's just. bleak. in a story purportedly about community building it's shockingly uncaring. you can't just sympathize with a morally grey character or take them As They Are without the story casting judgment and constantly reminding you of their verdict. it's just exhausting and makes any positive message the story tries to send feel hollow

OBLIGATORY NOTE: this essay does not mean "actually all fallen and e88 and etc should be empathized with". what it does mean is that in a moralistic work it becomes telling when ex-nazi rune gets her own interlude and a bunch of pagetime to show how she's 'doing better' while that same courtesy isn't extended to many villains who are traumatized and might have, say, legitimate reasons to not want to be arrested or feel like they have no other option, or legitimate reason to not support the heroes, but oh. they do Crimes so actually none of that matters as long as they're still Doing Crimes.

[animebw]

*patiently waits for the list of titles you're giving a chance this Fail season*

WELL WAIT NO LONGER MY FINE FRIEND

Must-Watch

The 100 Girlfriends Who Really Really Really Really Really Love You

Listen, do you know how good a harem anime has to be for me to recommend it? This was one of the funniest manga I've read and the adaptation does it justice and more.

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End

Yeah, it lived up to the hype. Let's see if it can match the strength of those incredible opening episodes for its whole run.

Spy x Family Season 2

THEY GOD MASAAKI GODDAMN YUASA TO DO THE NEW OP WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME

Runners-Up

Firefighter Daigo: Rescue in Orange

I guess Brain's Base has decided that making Kennjirou Tsuda narrate everything is a recipe for success, lol. But this is shaping up to be a really strong mix of character drama and disaster movie, with the courage to really take its time and let the weight of its sequences settle.

Migi and Dali

I don't think I can properly describe this one except to tell you to watch the first episode knowing nothing about what to expect.

Overtake

Good season for adult workplace drama between this and Daigo. More of an inspirational sports story for F4 racing, but done really well so far.

Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions

Honestly the detective side of this one is kinda weak so far. Thank god the characters are so entertaining and the production is so wonderfully energetic so you barely mind.

Shy

I was initially gonna recommend just reading the manga on this one, but then the second episode turned out lightyears better than the first, so hey. If you're looking for a superhero show to tide you over until MHA's next season, put this on your list.

Undead Unluck

Now this is a much better use of Fire Force's director than Fire Force was. Also, I have it on good authority that the gross groping gags vanish pretty quickly into the manga, so breathe easy on that front.

If You Have Time

Arknights: Perish in Frost

I'm still waiting to see if this can follow up on the first season's actually really good finale or if it'll settle into being just kinda boring again. Fingers crossed!

I'm in Love With the Villainness

I remember bouncing off the manga for this one, and the adaptation isn't exactly a stunner. But it's breezing through the most annoying parts of the opening chapters at a strong clip, so here's hoping it gets to the good stuff soon!

Stardust Telepath

Look, the main character's voice being really squeaky and annoying is usually a dealbreaker for me, but this has enough charm for me to stomach it for now. Love seeing CGDCT shows with this much energy in the production.

Uma Musume Season 3

I'll admit, that was probably the strongest opening episode we've had for an Uma Musume season. Will this be the moment the weird horse idol show finally clicks for me? Let's find out!

On Thin Ice

Ancient Magus Bride Season 2 Part 2

Ugh, this is really turning into a drag. I want to be on board with more Magus Bride, but the increasingly limp production and complete lack of focus on the main relationship are running my interest into the ground.

My Daughter Left the Nest and Returned an S-Rank Adventurer

I would very much like the main female character to gain a second personality trait beyond loving her daddy please and thank you.

Shield Hero Season 3

I... have no excuse for myself.

Already Dropped

16Bit Sensation Another Layer

Like I said:annoying squeaky moe voices are usually a dealbreaker for me. I made it seven minutes into the first episode before I couldn't stand listening to the protagonist for another second.

Bullbuster

I'll give you this, Bullbuster, it takes effort to take a premise like mecha vs monster battles filtered through realistic corporate and engineering bureaucracy and make it boring.

Faraway Paladin Season 2

God, did I really use to like this show? I'm sure I did, but this first episode really make me question what was ever interesting about it

Vexations of a Shut-In Vampire Princess

It took all of five minutes for the show to get into an extended sequence of the main character almost peeing herself in her pajamas. Hard pass.

[odetoviscera]

Baldur's Gate 3: The Evil Experience

on the recommendation of @leupagus: My Very Special Evil Boy, Vexation. don't worry about the blood, it's a fashion choice.

if you've been wondering how evil you can be in baldur's gate 3, wonder no more-- So Evil.

so beginning at the beginning, i of course chose the Dark Urge (obvious serial killer) origin, who is conveniently customizable, so i also made him Drow and a Lolth Worshipper and a Warlock (all of which has made him only marginally more evil, tbh, mostly the related dialogue options make him a smug bastard, although OCCASIONALLY this will give him a "hmm what if i enslaved you" option which people do indeed react to as if he's an evil maniac and they should flee and/or try to kill him. this goes great for them considering i'm the protagonist.)

i wake up on an illithid ship with no memories, as one does. i befriend a walking talking brain, by which i mean i lobotomize it so that i can more easily control and manipulate it, as one does. i may not know who i am, but i definitely know that i am powerful, mean, and more important than everyone here. also i have a great old one in my brain giving me eldritch blast, so the tadpole wriggling around in there seems normal. i crash the ship sort of accidentally and am set loose on my merry way to wrack the Sword Coast with terrible mayhem. probably. as soon as i figure out if i'm about to turn into a mindflayer.

the first sign of my uncontrollable evil mania was when i tried to talk to a squirrel in act one (actually, i tell a lie, the FIRST sign was when i was tempted to hack Gale's hand off instead of dragging him out of the portal he got stuck in, but i decided i needed a wizard more than a dismembered hand) and the narrator informed me i had been Gripped By A Compulsion and promptly dropkicked the squirrel into a tree. it died, obviously. i was given the option to decide if i cared about this and decided that my opinion was a frankly inappropriate level of malicious glee considering the heights from which i, clearly child of murder, have obviously fallen to get amnesia and get tadpoled and fall out of the sky on a dying illithid spaceship. anyway this set me up for Being Maximally Deranged, however there is No Karma Meter or any equivalent system to MEASURE your evil or limit your dialogue options-- i have free reign at all times, i COULD decide that suddenly i'm going to be a Repentant Murderer, i can do Nice Things if i want the reward or the exp or i am exercising my single scintilla of compassion accidentally inculcated by my eventual three simultaneous romances (one of which is with the mindflayer who lives in my brain/an artifact stopping ME from becoming a mindflayer. this game is so horny, very classic dnd "i roll to romance the villain". except i am also the villain.) at this point i have no romances, though-- at this point my companions watch me kick a squirrel to death and their collective response is "well… that seemed… excessive."

i also have the option to tell every single one of them individually that i am driven by a blood mania to murder and destruction. opinions of this range from "well admitting you have a problem is the first step!" to "that's nice, just point it at the enemy instead of ME". no one seems appropriately concerned about this. they'll learn.

anyway the next sign of my uncontrollable evil mania is that when i decided to be nice to a bard for no reason and she showed up at our next long rest to Join The Party (oh we do get a bard companion, that's nice, i said, like a fool.) i promptly murdered her in the night. as in i woke up covered in blood with her corpse ritually slaughtered at my feet and said "hm. probably shouldn't let anyone else find out i did this" and then sulked when no one gave me proper respect and rewards for murdering her. fortunately the next day my Evil Butler materialized to do just that, and proved he wasn't a figment of my imagination by giving me an Evil Cloak that lets me turn invisible everytime i murder someone. i spend the next half an act or so convinced i'm going to slowly kill off my party, but fortunately i develop the ability to control myself. now i only murder when I WANT to murder.

the rest of act one i am SORT OF a good boy-- i do deliberately get a child killed but i don't PERSONALLY kill her, i get a druid's snake to do it, so does it really count against MY soul? yes but only me and daddy bhaal know it so i am able to continue playing Goody Two Shoes for the rest of the act. (i don't know he's my daddy yet, but like… i know it. i, the player, know it. in my soul. i've played these games before.) delightful fallout, my child murder gets the druid killed after i Helpfully Save The Tieflings by telling the opposing force i'll totally help them break in and kill them all, then betraying them at the last minute. i kill so so so many goblins. i get an inspiration point for how many goblins i kill. goblins are still sentient. It's Still Murder.

act two, however, empowered by all my Blood And Chaos, i turn over a new leaf. sure sure being lauded by the tieflings was fun and all, but i do somewhat regret not killing EVERYONE. i'll do better this time. this shadow-cursed hellscape is really vibing with me. it's also trying to eat me every time i'm not carrying a magic lamp but you can't win 'em all. i pretend that i'm with the antagonists (can you call them villains when I'M the villain?) so i can get their lamp. it's carried by a drider who does not appreciate my sincere compliments about how beautifully fucked up he is. his loss, i'm down to fuck anyone. i'm already fucking a githyanki and a vampire spawn.

when i get to the Big Bad Tower where supposedly they'll know about my tadpole, i discover they know something WAY MORE IMPORTANT: who the fuck i am. everyone here recognizes me. no one will tell me anything. several of them are appropriately terrified. this is infuriating but also promising. the Big Bad is a smug dick and i want to eat his heart raw. i daydream about this.

my butler arrives to tell me if i murder a Special Girl i'll get a treat. i like treats and i LOVE murder so i go looking for her. she's maintaining a Magic Selenite Moon Shield over the single not-shadow-cursed place here, which i hate on principle-- also it's a harper outpost and i hate them too, they'd probably disapprove of murder. some rando minion with wings drops in to tell me the Big Bad of the region wants to kidnap her (ALIVE, he specifies) so obviously i now double want to kill her. i kill her in one round. the magic shield collapses. EVERYONE dies (including the tieflings i saved in act one! full circle.) and then i kill their shadow-cursed undead corpses again, for good measure.

my treat is getting to turn into the slayer. i KNEW i was a bhaalspawn.

behold my true glorious visage. (with blep.) my only complaint is that i can only become this hulking death machine once per long rest. it is, however, not a turn-limited form, i can stay in it Forever if no one kills me as long as i'm willing to Just Murder No Talking. also it has a spectacular ladder-climbing animation, this bitch goes down ladders face-down like a lizard, i love him.)

anyway i don't go back to the Big Bad Tower bc presumably they'll be mad about the dead girl (i'm guessing she's Big Bad's dead daughter miraculously resurrected. i'm totally right by the way.) but the last time i was there i got a quest to find the Big Bad's Relic, which is obviously his phylactery or something since he's got a whole death aesthetic-- after a whole Temple of Shar sequence it turns out his phylactery is a captive aasimar actually. my companion wants to murder her for shar-related reasons, so i give her the go-ahead since i don't have any SPECIAL reason to kill her myself. my companions should get to be evil occasionally too.

with his phylactery dead, it's pretty easy to mow through the Big Bad Tower, especially since i can now turn into the Death Machine. i don't have to talk to anyone here. i can Just Murder.

nearly kill the Big Bad but he flees to his basement, where it turns out there's an mindflayer colony, big deal, we've all got tadpoles in our brains (i've been eating other tadpoles for extra power along the way, because of course i have) okay fine it's a slightly big deal bc there's an elder brain here that my Special Mindflayer Friend is shielding us from whatever. it's under the control of the Big Bad who's death aesthetic turns out to be that he's the Chosen of Myrkul, and also here are reps of the other Dead Three, Bane and My Daddy. i hate bhaal's chosen on sight, as is traditional for a bhaalspawn. i will murder her someday. i will murder her SO GOOD.

unfortunately she and the baneite fuck off with their elder brain to lay siege to baldur's gate while i'm daydreaming about it, so for now all i get to murder is Big Bad Myrkul Edition. moderately satisfying. he turns in an Avatar of Myrkul in the second half but i destroy him so quickly he doesn't even get to regenerate with the hojillion corpses in the area. nobody murders like vexation.

off to baldur's gate to save the city/get bigger hunting grounds!

i do cure the shadow curse on my way out though, because i'm never coming back and i've left the place a blighted wasteland, why not, it gets me a pet druid.

there's also some drama with githyanki and vlaakith, as usual, turns out the Rebel Prince Orpheus is actually how my particular mindflayer (who is finally revealing that he's a mindflayer, a thing i have suspected all along because of all the psychic shit he does) is doing the shielding, etc. etc. also i let my mindflayer boyfriend turn me in a half-illithid, which means i get no tentacles but a BUNCH of new mindflayer powers to make me an even better murderer. can't wait to see who wins in the tug-of-war for my mind, body, and soul--the illithids, my great old one beyond the stars, a devil who keeps trying to get my attention, my vampire boyfriend who wants to ascend to vampire god, or Murder Daddy. my bet is murder daddy.

anyway we get to baldur's gate, where i break in bc i don't want any guards to know i'm here-- just jumped and flew my way up the side of the bridge past the checkpoint. easy peasy now that i have illithid flight powers on command no cooldowns just Psychically Levitate wherever i want to go. also i can turn into a displacer beast. that's right, i now have to option to become TWO DIFFERENT terrifying horror beasts and rip through mobs like papier-mache. my patron really needs to keep up, warlock powers are falling behind. (no they aren't, i've hit level 10 and can now eldritch blast three times in one round and every hit knocks enemies back and terrifies them. i'm gonna chew this city up and swallow it one bite.)

however, first thing when i get into the citadel: the baneite is being coronated Archduke, bc of course he is. so i head up to see if there's a chance to murder him and a room full of peers, BUT. for the first time EVER-- this little shit is willing to tell me Who I Am. Assassin of Bhaal, former high priest of His Temple, and ONE OF THE INVENTORS OF THIS CONQUEST PLAN. that little bhaalite chosen is my bhaalspawn sister (obviously) who fucking tadpoled me, gave me amnesia, and discarded me before making sure my corpse was cold. this will be a mistake! FOR HER.

in the meantime the baneite wants me to know that he is a big fan of mine, would i like to murder my sister since i already murdered the myrkulite, and then he and i can rule this city together with an iron grip and a blood knife, since he's sure he'll have a lot of use for an assassin as a tyrant. mind-reading and my brain-illithid agree that he is actually on the level about this, at least for the moment, so of course i agree. i will rule this city. and then i will murder him. and then i will murder EVERYONE. in THE WORLD.

so now i'm hunting the current chosen of bhaal so i can kill her and steal her place-- my butler is sending me divine visions of it, SHE can't turn into the slayer, i am evil daddy's favourite. she's also kidnapped one of my companions and is threatening to kill her if i show up but i care about that less.

and that's where i am so far! will report on Future Evils.

[anulithots]

Anuli out of context

Hmm, we'd make a very unreliable narrator, Anuli. Agreed, Anuli, agreed. Very well that we'd also make a very unreliable murderer. Also agreed, Anuli, agree-

I love writing Anuli's 'talking to faerself' monologues.

Somewhere in the world, a wasp plopped a leaf hat upon its head and found it quite pleasant.

Kamari clapped. I startled. My heart decided today was a fine day to take up an off-beat dance obsession.

I nodded. "Much ta da's"

Or, in this case, regular droplets inched, one after the other, with sunlit taunts, refracted over their lack of edges, in sparkles, shooting stars that traced the diffused sage of leaves with silver etches

Existence is a paradox, Anuli Or perhaps paradoxes are why I talk to myself, Anuli

I nodded, rustling the stolen moss - which started to mourn the water with its almost rough tips, and water heard none of its cries - beneath me.

Good thing I was not the protagonist. Only a side character... or, not even that - a narrator!

The story would stagnate, meander around in a useless monologue - much like this one - before the inevitable end of DEATH because NOTHING HAPPENED and the DUMB CHARACTER BRINGS NO JOY. ONLY UTTER DISPAIR AND INTERNAL SCREAMING.

It was fun writing an Anuli chapter about executive dysfunction

I poked my head. Be functional. Make stories. You have one job.

In order to avoid death one must follow the call to adventure! Hopefully the character's life means something to them and they don't... just... accept death.

Existence requires action. Do you hear me? Head? Thoughts? For now, I address thee, and banish thy dillydallying sliminess to the land of 'bleck'. BEGONE!

If it did, if it chose a path, the butterfly would have to admit its doomed narrative, and no one wanted to acknowledge their doom until it curled in their lap and ate a finger. The sillies. Nothing good comes from finger eating.

yes this is a reference

Sense trickled over the sides, left my insides dry, and clumped in static mush near my throat. Oh, wonderous. Quite wonderous. What joy.

Slipped through my fingers. All the wonders that could've been, left as dead buds, petals that never saw the sunlight or the stars

Ha! Silly Place of Tethers. Didn't it know that such villain advice - even when said with semi-sincerity - fell upon unhearing ears, for it was dumb.

The Kamari in question lilted faer voice to weave between the chirps of early crickets - early because cricket society values those with the almost recklessness needed to risk the light for a song - as a full moon spilled and sparkled over faer leaves.

Sometimes I feel like rhetorical devices are just a way to seem witty without actually being witty

The world set the scene for utmost joy while I flew in hapless circles and died beneath faded petals

"I - no-" I shook my hands but the tears clung. Silly things. Didn't they want a munity?

Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong. Nothing was wrong. Plot holes and darling murders; what was wrong with me?

'Too soon,' said the earth, 'Yet welcome, welcome little one; it was not your fault.' 'Oh, but it was,' said the butterfly, between sobs, 'for I wanted to fly forever.'

The funniest thing is that I only use 'said' for Anuli's characters.

Going insane whilst alone with the Place of Tethers would be perfectly in character

And that's it! Anuli out of context! Thank you for getting this far, and I hope you enjoyed the corners of faer brain... it only gets weirder and sillier from here!

@waitingforthesunrise @sm-writes-chaos @holdmyteaplease @full-on-sam @osbob-the-existent @awleeofficial @clearcloudlesssky @gummybugg @sleepy-vix @starryeyeddarlings @sea-dwelling-wizard

lmk if you'd like to be added or removed <3 🌿

[words-after-midnight]

Hello! A pre-emptive Storytelling Saturday for next week: Describe your WIP in bullet points so my ADHD brain gets it quickly! 🥺🥺🥺 I would love to hear more

(Let's just ignore the fact that it's Sunday.) Hey, sorry I've been sitting on this one for a little while!! I'm not sure if you mean bullet points as in an actual summary or tropes, features, etc. so I'll try to mix both in. I'll just do libaw & TDL since I feel like SUPERNOVA's still very much percolating and not necessarily concrete enough for this exercise. ^^

tl;dr: I primarily write extremely dark (realistic) crime fiction focused around complex and unsympathetic queer characters. Fair warning: dead doves and heavy themes abound.

LIFE IN BLACK AND WHITE 🌙❄️ | Adult psychological thriller

A man works to overcome an increasingly dark obsession with his estranged ex-lover after the catastrophic interruption of their twisted relationship, only for an unexpected event to bring the past back to haunt him - literally.

Themes: Importance of nuance, domestic abuse/violence, control, agency, choice, obsession, unrequited love, mental illness and recovery, stigma;

Unreliable (and often unsympathetic) narrator;

Protagonist is obsessed/"in love" with the antagonist;

Heavy use of symbolism;

Fast-paced;

Aughts period piece;

Very intimate, introspective narrative (first person present ftw);

Queer lit, but make it dark and gritty.

THE DOTTED LINE 💀🐍 | Adult psychological horror

Young inmate navigates the perilous terrain of a U.S. medium security prison while plotting his escape (+ various bonus antics that sound very made up);

Villain protagonist with some very... interesting opinions... who lives by his own convoluted rules and morality;

Side cast that the protagonist gives zero shits about but usually still manage to be compelling;

Extremely dramatic events described in the most deadpan tone imaginable;

Themes: Survival, reinvention of self, identity, agency/autonomy, nature vs. nurture, corruption, prison abolition/heavy critique of the correctional system.

Experimental psychological and body horror + plays with classic slasher tropes; heavy experiments with form/prose/structure.

Subverts the hero's journey structure.

Currently drafting very slowly and intermittently; the draft should be finished in approximately 84 business years.

[naamahdarling]

Some people call bunnies Vegan Cats, so I was wondering if you would provide some professions for these two fluffs even though their servant (aka Mommy, aka me) didn’t follow directions?

Morphi is the white bunny with eyeliner and beauty mark- cuddled between his two loves: bowl and DeDe. Short for Morpheus Lord of Dreams He is a bit…stupid - usually has nothing but elevator music playing between his ears. Occasionally his two brain cells align and he is a mad genius until he inevitably moves and they fall out of alignment. He’s also a picky bitch and turns his nose up at certain greens and fruits. And expects humans to move out of his way when he is on the move. If you don’t do what he wants he will box you and then nip you. Methodically gets treats out of puzzles but will just stare blankly at you when you first offer him one from your hand. The vet and vet techs call him a little angel because he is so chill when they have to examine him or clip his nails.

DeDe is short for Death. She is a criminal mastermind with PTSD from having a rough kithood when she was dumped in a green space near our old house. We got her to a rescue and then adopted her when we moved in to our current place. She can tell time and will come get us if we are late for meals. She has claimed a large decorative knife I placed on a low shelf (she rubs her chin on it whenever she walks by). Dislikes having her picture taken. She loves Morphi but is a huge asshole to him (chases him, steals his treats and toys, kicks him out of their tent). It takes two vet techs to examine her or trim her nails, and has scratched the hell out of me for daring to pick her up. But she loves her manservant (aka Daddy, aka my partner), and will let him pick her up, comb her, and pet her.

They both love to hide behind furniture and pestered the ouija board box so much I had to remove said board and let them go hogwild on the box. Morphi likes to eat my clothes off the drying racks and DeDe eats any and all wires while I am rescuing my underwear. I love them with every inch of my being.

VEGAN CATS!!!

Morphi is the boy sidekick of the tough and plucky girl protagonist. Without him, plots would not advance and she would have nobody to confide in. Critically, while not the protagonist, the book is from his point of view, and his narration is so charming that the reader does not realize until some way in that he's a bit of a himbo. Were it not for Plot happening, he would be a househusband (husbun?), but would have some stuff going on the side. Like a really successful Youtube channel or something, where he shows off some sort of cool hobby like time lapse puzzle assembly or model railroading, or he might play the synthesizer and do off-genre covers of classical music.

DeDe is the supposed villain of the week, until she crops up in Season 3 as a real badass. She's not quite there yet, but is readying herself to make her play. That said, her rough background makes me feel like she isn't merely a villain, that perhaps she comes around, and joins the heroes' side. She is formidable, her methods are questionable, but she gets results. I'm seeing her as some sort of rogue or thief or cat burglar. Vegan Catwoman, almost. Someone who moves around stealthily or infiltrates by deception. She is hard to catch off-guard but can be very affectionate with those she has adopted for her own. Don't mess with her found family.

[whack-patty]

[points at you] FAVORITE CREEPYPASTA OF ALL TIME GO

ALRIGHT FOR ANYONE WHO FOLLOWS THIS BLOG WHO IS YOUNGER/NOT A FAN OF HORROR I'M GONNA PUT A CUT HERE JUST IN CASE: SPOOKY CLOWN VIDEO THUMBNAIL BELOW THE CUT. ((I may be being too cautious but I am well aware that my usual artistic content on this blog may attract people who are less comfy with the uncanny than I am so it never hurts to be respectful))

Ok so fav one I've read, mostly for nostalgia reasons, is of friggin course Chicken Bones

Read it as a kid and it was the earliest reading experience I can remember going "WOAH... YOU CAN HAVE A VILLAIN WITHOUT SEEING THE VILLAIN??? YOU CAN HAVE STORY HAPPEN BEHIND THE SCENES AND STILL KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING WITHOUT IT BEING SPOON-FED TO THE AUDIENCE??? YOU CAN HAVE A CLIFFHANGER ENDING THAT DOESN'T SUCK???? AMAZING" and it's changed my brain chemistry ever since. I want to learn how to do what the ending of chicken bones did to 12 year old me

Also it has a cool setting description at one point and the protagonist's only description is a canonically ugly haircut <333 gotta love me a story where the protagonist isn't a sacred little angel or the coolest guy in the room

CURRENT favorite creepypasta to listen to is Creepsmcpasta's edition of Mayhem Mountain!!!

I GENUINELY USE THIS TO HELP ME FALL ASLEEP.

ITS A DANG GOOD ONE BECAUSE ok ngl I'm just realizing how similar my reasoning is for liking both stories. Apparently I have a type

Anyway spoilers:

- also has a villain (this time with a name) but they never see or interact with him once

- ARCHITECTURAL HORROR!!!!!

- A MIDDLE AGED CAST!!!!

- all with distinct personalities that are shown through the way they interact with each other, not just told as archetypes!!!

- there's TWO girl characters, and they aren't JUST "and this is my unnamed girlfriend who dies" ((my standards are so low for pastas hAHQGEFD))

- THE NARRATION IS. MMMM 👌👌👌 GOALS. The author shows what needs to be shown and tells just enough without it being too much and its delicious

- actually really accurate descriptions of what it's like to be in a life or death situation instead of the protag reacting like an anime character or an action hero to it

- and apparently I'm a huge sucker for "the villain is still at large" stories where the villain is a normal human instead of an unkillable monster

ANYWAY YES. CREEPYPASTAS MY BE FRIGGIN L O V E D. There's more good ones but these two take the cake for me hands down

[silvercrowsystem]

Not to bring the Disk Horse back but this is concerning:

Legitimately, I do not understand the issues with proshipping, and why it's seemingly so endemic to the DID community now. The rules are very simple:

Do what you want in the privacy of your own head.

Write whatever you want, but tag it appropriately so others can avoid.

Ship whatever you want, it is fiction and does no harm of itself.

When the hells did we stray from the basic tenets of Fandom and Transformative Works? It's FICTION! Hurt/Comfort? Whump? It's largely just vent art under another name! Tag it, or blacklist it, and move on.

Writing about a subject is not tacit approval of its real world counterparts! Unreliable narrators exist. Protagonist does not mean "hero of the story." Antagonist does not mean "Villain." And professionals all tend to agree that working something out through its fictitious representation; whether art, writing, music, etc; is healthier for the brain than ignoring it or pretending it doesn't exist.

It allows us to explore "problematic" emotions and situations without involving real people. That is GOOD! It is HEALTHY!

[wip-collector-ace]

Time for me to rate different popular book tropes on a scale of 1-10 ✨

Y'all are free to agree or disagree.

The Chosen One: Eh, I mean, there are good books/TV shows/movies using this trope, but why does it always have to be a teenager or somebody really young? /rh. Give me a middle-aged woman or something [6.5/10]

Enemies to Lovers: I personally only like it when there are queer undertones (or overtones) to it because if I wanted to see straight couples argue and insult each other and then forget about it seconds later in real time, I'd go to my parents' house /hj. Don't get me started on Booktok (they are literally incapable of doing this trope well). [Hetero- 2.5/10; Queer- 7.5/10]

Lovers to Enemies: The drama. The heartbreak. Scrabbling for what is left before it slips away and it's too late to save it... Look, I'm not normally one for romance--- HOWEVER, this always gets me (especially if done well). [9/10]

Love Triangles: Kill it with fire. [1/10]

Redemption Arc: We've all seen Zuko's character arc--- need I say anything more? But seriously, this trope has real potential to be amazing in the right hands. Not all antagonists deserve redemption, but if you have a strong arc, I can be convinced to ignore the batshit evil they've probably done. /hj. [8/10]

Found Family: Oh, I love me some found family--- with or without a happy ending. People of different backgrounds come together after getting over their differences and realize that the bonds they've created are stronger than what anyone else could give them?? I eat that shit up. [8/10]

Main Character Having Obvious Plot Armor: Look, this may not be a specific trope, but we've seen/read what it is so we know. I get it--- the main character needs some level of plot armor to get through the story (that is if you don't plan on killing them off), but you cannot sit there and tell me that the protagonist managed to get away from 10 people shooting at them unscathed /nbh. Make it excusable/believable. [Overall, 4.5/10]

Unlikely Allies: Literally enemies to lovers minus the lovers part and now the 'hero' and the 'villain' are confused about why they're friends now. Seriously though, I really enjoy seeing people with contrasting personalities or motives being brought together by outside forces to work together to a 'common goal'. It doesn't even require for it to be romantic--- which I really like. It's great. [7/10]

Unreliable Narrator: Being gaslit by a book? Honestly? I like it. [7.5/10]

The Red Herring: If done well, this trope keeps me hooked. I particularly like this in thrillers and horror novels. However, if you just have a red herring just to throw people off and never bring it up again or it has no ties to the rest of the story, then why? (If that makes sense) Anyways, shout out to Beyond Evil for making my brain mush with the amount of plot twists and red herrings it contains. [Overall, 5.5/10]

[waldensblog]

Reading King of Scars and Rule of Wolves

So I’m all caught up on the Grishaverse novels now! What a ride! I’m a bit late to the fandom but happy to be here and absolutely ready to tell you all about my love of this duology in particular. 

Most will be below the cut, but the TL;DR of it is: -I am still a Darknikolina, so I absolutely lived for every Darkolai moment, and loved the small Darklina and Nikolina scraps I got. 

-I love the Darkling’s arc and see it as an anti-villain to anti-hero one.

-Nina is now my favourite crow, and also I loved the crows cameo. 

In the original trilogy, we only have Alina’s POV, and as much as I love the intimacy of being in a single character’s head, alternating POVs is a big strength of both the Soc Dulogy and the KoS Duology because it gives us a wider scope, and helps alleviate the “unreliable narrator” syndrome that a single POV can have (I touch on this briefly at the end with my “extra” section). Being able to go into Nikolai’s head, Zoya’s head, Nina’s head, the Darkling’s head, Isaak’s head, and Mayu’s head gave a lot of depth to the story because it let us see how different character’s perceived the same events. 

Nikolai I adored being in Nikolai’s head, because I loved seeing what he actually thinks. He always plays a charming, roguish prince/king, so seeing his own worries and insecurities that he never voices is great. I loved his diplomacy with the Starless Saint Cult, because it really shows what a great leader he actually is - he doesn’t have to agree with a perspective to listen to it, and he knows he won’t change anyone’s mind by shutting them down and making them feel unheard or dismissed. I loved the cameo with the Crows in Ketterdam too. In terms of ships with him? I’m still a Darknikolina, so I liked when he mentioned Alina and how the rejection still kind stung, and how he had maybe started to love her. It was nice to see him move on from her, though I’m not fully on board with him and Zoya - I don’t dislike it, but it didn’t eat holes in my brain as it did for others, so I suppose I’m just neutral on those 2. I was, however, absolutely obsessed with every Darkolai moment. More on that below. The way he got pulled into a bit of a tether with the tea scene, seeing Alina from the Darkling’s POV? Rent free in my head as a Darknikolina.

The Darkling and my continued Darknikolina obsession The Darkling, oh yes, oh YES. I LOVED being in his head. He is still absolutely unhinged and it is excellent. The way he occasionally trails off in his mind when he approaches an uncomfortable thought, the way Alina lives rent-free in his mind. I really really wish we had one last POV chapter with him near the end - either his sacrifice from his POV, something right before that (maybe his escape/capture or sitting in the war room like a Drama QueenTM waiting for them to notice him), but since we didn’t - I’m extremely happy it was in Nikolai’s POV. I ADORE his arc. In the original trilogy, he is the anti-villain. He has noble goals, but his methods are not. He is tired, and willing to do anything - very much any-means-necessary the-ends-justify-the-means and it is fascinating from a philosophical POV, character analysis, etc. I am obsessed with how he absolutely haunts the narrative in King of Scars, and then in Rule of Wolves, he comes back, we have his POV, and he takes on an anti-hero role, showing how the anti-villain and anti-hero are really 2 sides of the same coin - again, from an character analysis POV, it’s fantastic. His sacrifice at the end for Ravka... I wish he wasn’t being tortured for eternity, but I LOVE that he gets a redemption arc and the way the protagonists end with “he doesn’t deserve this” even if they can’t forgive everything he did (and he isn’t asking them to). I love it so, so much.  Ship-wise? As I said, still a Darknikolina.  “Bring me Alina Starkov”, wanting to see what became of the girl who (literally and figuratively) drove a blade through his heart, “where is she?” Elizaveta wouldn’t tell him, implying he asked a bunch, the effect her very voice had on him, the ENTIRE tea-with-your-ex scene (you can’t convince me either of them is really over the other. Alina could have just said no to tea, she didn’t. She grieved him at the end of the trilogy, she wanted to see him too I NEED this fanfic from her POV like right now), the way she absolutely lived rent-free in his head in his POV chapters, Yes. YES!!!!!!  But also. Also. The banter with Nikolai, the way neither of them has entirely pure “you are enemy” thoughts towards the other and cringes at the thought of the other being hurt - Darkling actively HELPING “the boy king” against the Fjerdans by giving a power boost to their shadow demon they have a shared link to (almost like shared custody lol) and then thinking “hmm, I could do more” before ultimately going “nah”. When “the bastard actually winked at him” YEEEEEEEEEEEEES. When the Darkling tells Nikolai he can’t be the sacrifice and does it himself and then Nikolai and the Demon feel the pain and Nikolai can’t stay because it’s become a place of MOURNING. YES. YESYESYESYES. The books did NOT dissuade my Darkolai-ness and only amplified it.  

Zoya I never thought much of Zoya in the original trilogy - neither good or bad, she was just there. Now, as a main character, we had her POV. I will say, I didn’t love her or dislike her - she was probably my least fave of the main characters, but  that isn’t a strike against her but rather as a comment to how much I loved these books and characters. Given how many people love her, I expected to love her too, but I didn’t. I enjoyed being in her head okay, and I do like her arc - especially because at the beginning, I kept thinking she was a bit too hot-headed to make a good General, but near the end she seems to be more in control of her temper, so I think she’ll have some bumps in the road but manage. 

Nina Nina, oh Nina my beloved. I love this bisexual waffle loving crow. I loved her POV chapters, though they seemed entirely disconnected from the main Ravka story for the majority of the novels - they only link up at the very end. It isn’t an entirely bad thing, but from a reader POV, it would be nice if they were more clearly connected from the start. I never really vibed with her and Mathias, but I like her with Hanne. The idea of Grisha spies on the Fjerdan throne is hilarious, though I’m not sure how long they can really pull that off - even with Nina’s necromancer abilities.

Extra Also, one more thing. Because we spent the trilogy in Alina’s head, she kept going on and on about how everyone loved Mal, how he fit in everywhere, how handsome he was, etc. but then in these books... sure, he popped up, but he was not described that way by other characters. He was very much “the tracker”, and kinda just trailing along as Alina’s plus one. Which is hilarious to me because it confirms for me that Alina had serious Mal-goggles on the entirely trilogy, so everyone else was kinda like “Who? Oh right that guy”. The man did not live rent-free in ANYONE else’s head like Alina seems to think he does (this is not Mal hate. It’s just funny to me). 

Overall I absolutely LOVED these books and I think they are my fave of the Grishaverse novels. I am extremely excited to see how they will adapt these for season 3 of the show, even though I know they’re going a different direction with the show in general, I am hopeful they keep my fave elements (bring back Ben Barnes!!!!!! Don’t even bother with the in-Yuri’s-body-shifting-face thing, just bring back Ben!!!!!! Give him this arc and keep the Darkolai!!!) and add some things that weren’t there (MORE Darknikolina!!!!!), the Crows are already in this story, so I’m sure they can weave the Ice Court Heist in, and maybe more of their RoW role in S4. If we do get another Crows book with Sankt Felix heart and the thornwood, I hope it’s as good as RoW at least, and it could make a good S5. 

[leatherbookmark]

that being said, and i'm sorry for being a cunt, but

it's... very irritating to read mxtx gushing about how utterly likeable wwx is, how cute lwj is when he's got wwx on his brain, how xy is "trash yang" (this is not from the interview but from the chapter comments), or... whatever she said about jgy... is the interview in japanese or chinese? i've seen chinese terms brought up by the translators and i just ???

it's just like. girl? are we all stupid for reading like, moral greyness, unreliable narrators, Layers into your work? her answers can sound so... idk, shallow? at times. the part abt her "feeling bad for jgy, but please go die now" stayed in my mind for obvious reasons, and now the 狡猾, because: no, wait, hold up, why? i want to hear more! you wrote this character, this antagonist who isn't even working against the protagonist, who's similar but different, whose circumstances are tragic and understandable as such, and you just go... cool motive, still villain, go die? like, seriously?

on top of that, i always wince when people describe jgy as cunning, crafty, plotting, treacherous, manipulative great actor etcetc, because it paints him as this... confident grey eminence who's got everything under control, rather than a guy who just... tries to survive... there was a post abt wwx's manipulation -- literally pissing people off into doing what he wants them to do -- but he's never called manipulative. but someone who doesn't know jgy would think his moustache is a thing straight out of uzumaki. it's like boiling xy down to an insane psycho who's so craaaazy and evil! 100% deranged! it's just incorrect. it's not even "well yes, but it's actually deeper than you think", it's just wrong.

...and then i see the author doing the same. AM I INSANE.

similarly, it's kinda strange to read her gushing about wwx and lwj, because while i understand on a technical level that People Are Different, most of the fic writers i know/have read are drawn to characters because they're fucked up, complex, tragic; they're a puzzle, a fascinating mechanism. not a great guy who's so great and amazing, seriously, who wouldn't like him. have i mentioned that he and his boyfriend are in love that's stronger than everything else in the world? like. did you... write wwx being supremely obnoxious as a teen while thinking he's the coolest guy imaginable?

there was a time when i, still in the clutches of cql wgxn, saw a couple of novel excerpts and decided i hated them. wwx was so annoying! lwj was so different and unappealing! i'm not gonna read this book, it's going to ruin the characters for me! and i mean. it kind of did, but also it didn't. and i sort of... feel this way about the word of god. like, yeah, some of that stuff is interesting, although it's not anything i'd consider invaluable or even particularly enlightening -- but mostly. it's just annoying

[thethirdromana]

Speaking of masculinity, the "sequel" to the Beetle was published a couple of years later, called The Goddess. It features Sydney Atherton (in personality) as the narrator-protagonist. He arguably is even more macho and punchy, and is a “prodigy of bone and muscle”, “an adventurer from the four corners of the world, soiled with something of the grime from each of them”. He is ready to fight every single man. He falls in love at first sight with a girl who comes from his window amnesiac and covered in blood (she witnessed a bloody murder, which brain-fevered her). Her personality is being brain-fevered and child-like. He calls her “an angel”, keeping with the Victorian the Angel in the House (she was an independent actress before this, but the bloody scene changed her to this.) The protagonist is rough with everyone except her and is trying to prove she didn't kill the man. They marry at the end. One of the characters is called The Jew, who forges signatures and collects money from his grift. The title character is an Indian goddess idol that laughs evilly, performs consensual sadomasochism, encourages alcoholism, fratricide, crimes, and kills with At Least Fifty Knives At Once. The villain is a middle-class madman who traveled to India, and is described as effeminate, which makes sense because madness was called "a female malady" in the late 19th century.

Dialogue sample of the climax:

‘I’ll kill you!’ he kept on muttering, in a voice which fury had made husky. ‘Don’t be an ass!’ I cried. But he was an ass.

I have to admit, you're not really selling it to me.

(OK, "'Don't be an ass!' I cried. But he was an ass" is objectively hilarious. But I'm not sure if that's what our pal RM was going for.)

[anitrendz]

REVIEW: I’m the Villainess, so I’m Taming the Final Boss AKA My Guilty Pleasure

Season aired: Fall 2022

Number of episodes: 12

Watched on: Crunchyroll

Translated by: ?

Genres: Fantasy, Romance, Comedy

Thoughts: I’m the Villainess, so I’m Taming the Final Boss is my guilty pleasure of the season. While others immediately assumed the story would be a carbon copy of a prior villainess anime, I knew that would not be the case. Despite the lack of female-led isekai anime, I’ve enjoyed each one I’ve watched more than male-led isekai due to the variety of plots, characters, and themes. I knew that this one would resemble nothing of My Next Life as a Villainess: All Routes Lead to Doom aside from the premise, and I was right.

After her fiancé rejects her in favor of another girl, Aileen awakens her past memories as a sickly girl in her previous life. Unable to live freely like everyone else, she spent her days playing games – one of which was an otome game. After dying, she is reincarnated as the ill-fated Aileen, the antagonist of the otome game who suffers a humiliating death after the rejection of her fiancé. Indignant at the prospect of dying before her time again, Aileen sets a course of action to marry the demon lord, Claude, instead. Claude was the final antagonist of the otome game. Why shouldn’t two villains team up and live their lives to the fullest together?

I like I’m the Villainess, so I’m Taming the Final Boss for several reasons. Aileen’s an incredible protagonist who is determined, intelligent, and funny. She’s got quite the business- and political-minded brain, and she’s very active in taking what she wants and going where she wants to go. Claude is an attractive male love interest that my inner teenager couldn’t help but swoon. The world is larger than one would expect with multiple kingdoms and different cultures. There are plot twists that, despite my experience in watching anime, continue to surprise me.

Nevertheless, the anime is mediocre. Many of the things I praise above are directly due to the source material — not what the adaptation brings to the table. In fact, the adaptation brings down the story instead due to its irregular pacing and subpar animation.

The anime fits three separate arcs in just 12 episodes, and each arc has enough material to easily fit a 12-episode format. Things happen at breakneck speed, and the ending of each arc is wrapped up like someone speedreading through the narration.

This bad pacing hurts the first arc more than anything else, because the first arc is about the development of romance between Aileen and Claude. In just four episodes, they fall in love despite the fact that Claude has every reason to be suspicious of Aileen. She’s a stranger once formally engaged to his estranged younger half-brother who marched up the doorsteps to his demonic castle and demanded the two get married without any explanations. Since the first arc’s purpose is to establish character dynamics without as much plot, speeding through that development makes the characters feel shallower and the relationships forced. Although I like Aileen and Claude’s interactions, I still can’t help but feel like something is missing.

While not as evident in the later arcs due to plot, the rushed pacing does sacrifice the supporting characters and their respective dynamics, as well. Villains who take a turn seem to become better people out of nowhere. Other romances between supporting characters don’t fully make sense. Worst of all, it doesn’t even give proper time for a well-waited reunion between the two main characters of the series. Yet, the fact that I still enjoyed the underlying story and characters prove that the anime could’ve done so much more.

The visuals and animation struggled from beginning to end. The character faces are flat, the world looks like a children’s cartoon in a non-purposeful way, and the most animation we ever see are the characters running and walking. To hide the lack of animation, the anime will often switch back and forth between angles and perspectives that conveniently skip over movement. The technique works in the first few instances, but it becomes increasingly obvious as the anime depends on it.

The only two technical aspects the series does well are the music and the voice acting. The music is dramatic with orchestral accompaniment, perfect for the comedic dramatism of the series. The soundtrack even includes duck noises, a hilarious motif that directly ties to one of the funniest running jokes in the entire series.

With a cast of award-winning seiyuus, the voice acting remains on-point from beginning to end. Rie Takahashi was perfect as the rambunctious, intelligent, and funny Aileen with her flexibility to deepen her voice which came in handy in the second arc. Yuichiro Umehara’s distinctly deep and silky voice helped elevate Claude’s skipped development, lackluster facial expressions, and lack of movement. Despite Claude’s eyes staring straight ahead emotionlessly in several pivotal scenes, it’s the voice acting that portrays exasperation, surprise, or fear. Tomokazu Sugita is unrecognizable as Almond, an adorable crow demon, and Jun Fukuyama always nails suspicious yet silly characters like Keith.

So, despite my critiques of the anime itself, I actually end this series with a lot of hope. While I’m the Villainess, so I’m Taming the Final Boss didn’t perform to my expectations, its ability to still win me over every Saturday with its story and characters is proof of something bigger: female-led isekai are worth adapting. Perhaps this is just the beginning to a new phase of isekai, where we will be able to enjoy many female-led isekai with even better adaptations.

Rating

Plot: 7 (Multiplier 3.5)

Characters: 7 (Multiplier 3.5)

Voice acting: 8

Art/Animation: 5

Soundtrack: 7.5

FINAL SCORE: 69.5

[transfemgorgug]

just had a dream that netflix was somehow causing a tsunami that was going to destroy most of iran and one other country i can’t remember for profit. and the countries were bordering each other but are nowhere near each other irl also when’s the last time there was a TSUNAMI in IRAN. points for anti capitalism ig but points deducted for not knowing jack shit about geography. also it was a romance and it was about a bunch of rich teen socialites. also i know netflix was somehow going to be foiled bc the movie (the dream was told in movie format btw) was being narrated by someone telling future events, and it mentioned the leads’ children also i kind of *was* the main lead, but not fully? like her name was rose i think and GODDAMMIT I THINK THE ROMANTIC INTEREST’S NAME WAS JACK. IVE NEVER EVEN SEEN TITANIC FUCK OUTTA HERE. it was gay though so at least there’s that. also the “me partially being the protagonist” thing showed up when me and the love interest went on our first date and i was considering throwing my ten year plan out of the window to marry this woman and donate my rich socialite money to important causes and travel the world fundraising for those causes, kinda like tahani in the good place but without the family drama. and i was like “fuck how am i gonna explain this to my real world gf. maybe he’ll come with me? oh i hope he comes with me” also it took place in massachusetts somehow, and i woke up before my brain could figure out how to foil netflix. when i woke up the villain (who was probably the ceo of netflix i’m not sure) has just locked rose/me in a like. panic room compound thing so she’d survive, but had abandoned everyone else for dead, even though he said he was gonna save some of them. and there was this really poignant moment where roses mom was like “but rose is safe” and all roses/my loved ones, who were all in this crowd, were quiet for a moment and then were like “yeah…at least rose is safe”. which is really cringe and main character energy of me sorry y’all. but then roses mom started investigating this weird box office thing that was there for some reason and it had a netflix employee in there who had been covering the box office windows in anti-netflix graffiti. and for some reason he was still as a statue until roses mom realized he was the one who’s done the graffiti, and then he started talking and everyone was like “oh shit we thought you might’ve been dead”. also at some point the villain was talking to roses mom (who definitely wasn’t my mom my mom sucks shit) about his evil plan and he was showing this simulation of what would happen in the tsunami and he was threatening to kill rose/me, he showed her how he could save me and it was really bullshit and even in the dream world roses mom was like “that looks fake as hell there’s no way thats gonna work. and if it somehow does work nobody’s gonna buy it and everyone’s gonna know the tsunami was done on purpose”. anyway sorry about the wall of text how’s everyone doing tonight.